Hi! I see that this video was posted 3 years ago! I hope it is still being watched. My own understanding of freedom has been broadened since studying Montessori, and am really interested in dialogue about how/why it "works"...aka, is fundamental to true, deep learning and personality development. Montessori was very much onto something that our culture had lost(and is still groping for in the dark)... somehow. An understanding about how children learn and what they need to thrive well. It seems to me that freedom is essential in the cultivation of the ability to fully engage in the world, and do so with joy. Its why people all over the world will fight to the death for it! Didi is right when she observes that many people are afraid of "giving" too much freedom to children. Unfortunately, many parents seem to devote much time and energy into "predicting" what bad thing the child may do, or what bad thing could result from a child's behavior or actions, and seem determined to make sure that the child is aware of that bad thing and that it would be bad if that bad ting happens. Things such as hurting oneself, spilling, knocking something over, making noises at a quiet time, the list is quite long. All this over-management and warning is not helpful to the child. occasional interference is obviously fine and sometimes helpful, but it needs to be spare. These "bad" outcomes are all common and often necessary mistakes in the quest for knowledge and competency, and unless the situation is severely dangerous, you are actually interfering in development and self-control. I feel really bad for these kids! And also the parents/adults, because they are only making their own situation more difficult without knowing it. So...freedom to make mistakes!!! I do have a bit of an issue with the concept of "freedom within limits". It confuses me a bit, because the idea can easily be watered to down enough to be both meaningless and manipulative. I see so many adults giving children "choices" that have no depth, thinking that this is the "right" way to parent, such as choosing a breakfast cereal or what socks to wear. Just imagine if these were the only options you had! Another version of this is the endless negotiating until both sides seem to concede something in order to appease the other, in order to move on with life. This seems like such a huge amount of energy to spend on small things so often, and does little to build trust or a sense of ease and charity. My own idea of how to incorporate freedom into a relationship is thus: one person asks(or demands) for something, the other person has freedom to respond yes or no(not necessarily the words...response can also be action,either immediate action or action taken later). So the communication has been made...one person has told the other what they need or what they would like. The other person can take that in in whatever capacity they may have at the time, and respond as their capacity dictates. This is why Montessori INVITES children to watch a lesson, and children are INVITED to use those materials at a time that works for them. In terms of psychology, this respect for the autonomy of others develops trust and a sense of security in the relationship. I believe that this is a key reason that so many children really thrive in a well-run Montessori classroom! I'd like to know if this makes sense to others...thanks!
I’m a nanny! I usually have to follow schedules, when the children are to be up, that they need to be dressed and down for breakfast, for the ones in school, to be ready to leave on time, how can implement these in a way that allows for freedom of choice, movement, time, etc.
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Hi! I see that this video was posted 3 years ago! I hope it is still being watched. My own understanding of freedom has been broadened since studying Montessori, and am really interested in dialogue about how/why it "works"...aka, is fundamental to true, deep learning and personality development. Montessori was very much onto something that our culture had lost(and is still groping for in the dark)... somehow. An understanding about how children learn and what they need to thrive well. It seems to me that freedom is essential in the cultivation of the ability to fully engage in the world, and do so with joy. Its why people all over the world will fight to the death for it! Didi is right when she observes that many people are afraid of "giving" too much freedom to children. Unfortunately, many parents seem to devote much time and energy into "predicting" what bad thing the child may do, or what bad thing could result from a child's behavior or actions, and seem determined to make sure that the child is aware of that bad thing and that it would be bad if that bad ting happens. Things such as hurting oneself, spilling, knocking something over, making noises at a quiet time, the list is quite long. All this over-management and warning is not helpful to the child. occasional interference is obviously fine and sometimes helpful, but it needs to be spare. These "bad" outcomes are all common and often necessary mistakes in the quest for knowledge and competency, and unless the situation is severely dangerous, you are actually interfering in development and self-control. I feel really bad for these kids! And also the parents/adults, because they are only making their own situation more difficult without knowing it. So...freedom to make mistakes!!!
I do have a bit of an issue with the concept of "freedom within limits". It confuses me a bit, because the idea can easily be watered to down enough to be both meaningless and manipulative. I see so many adults giving children "choices" that have no depth, thinking that this is the "right" way to parent, such as choosing a breakfast cereal or what socks to wear. Just imagine if these were the only options you had! Another version of this is the endless negotiating until both sides seem to concede something in order to appease the other, in order to move on with life. This seems like such a huge amount of energy to spend on small things so often, and does little to build trust or a sense of ease and charity. My own idea of how to incorporate freedom into a relationship is thus: one person asks(or demands) for something, the other person has freedom to respond yes or no(not necessarily the words...response can also be action,either immediate action or action taken later). So the communication has been made...one person has told the other what they need or what they would like. The other person can take that in in whatever capacity they may have at the time, and respond as their capacity dictates. This is why Montessori INVITES children to watch a lesson, and children are INVITED to use those materials at a time that works for them. In terms of psychology, this respect for the autonomy of others develops trust and a sense of security in the relationship. I believe that this is a key reason that so many children really thrive in a well-run Montessori classroom! I'd like to know if this makes sense to others...thanks!
I’m a nanny! I usually have to follow schedules, when the children are to be up, that they need to be dressed and down for breakfast, for the ones in school, to be ready to leave on time, how can implement these in a way that allows for freedom of choice, movement, time, etc.
ON POINT!!!! I am sharing your video on my social media. :)
excellent video!
Kindly keep post a video about gentle parenting and positive discipline.
great video thank you!!!!!!