I think y’all in the comments are mistaking that polygamy was revealed to quench out mens desires, it was not 🙂. It was actually meant to protect woman/and their offspring, that verse was revealed post war (after war) where many woman where left widowed and their offspring were left fatherless. Plus all the wives of the prophet were divorcees/widowed except literally (one)
Discussion is not required. Every Muslim woman should go into marriage knowing that her husband may at some point take another wife. if you discuss it before he may at the time not desire another wife, but it could change later in life and there's nothing wrong with it provided he is able to.
@@kharkaroto9486 For that reason, the women should put up a marriage contract and write this, if she does not want a cowife. This is the right of the women and every women should know about it.
@@selenamuller9012 personally I think that notion of putting in the contract doesn't stand. I will go away and research it, because it seems ridiculous to say the least. Putting conditions is understandable, outright prohibition is ridiculous. Anyway I would hope men would have the sense not to marry such a woman. If women start doing this en masse there's going to be a lot of single women and rightfully so.
@@EliteKozarcan I believe in Allaah❤❤❤ The Most Just. The Most Loving, The Most Murcifel. Think about it. Men are arrogant they think that they had the right to marry 4 wifes. Who they think they are?? A3oudoubillaah min asjataan erajeem. Laaillahaillellaah ❤ ❤ ❤
@@khadijabenassou8996 Are you aware that there are more female than male on this planet? Indeed who are these men who want to marry 4 women and grant them dignity and security, it's beter the take 1 spouse and date 3 on the side right? hahhaha you ignorence is beyond me
I think its outdated (Polygyny) my mom was in polygyny with my dad and we saw him only once a month for one week. One week out the month was horrible. We needed our dads protection and he was with others wives. Why practice Polygyny when you can't protect your family amd leave them at the mercy of criminal to harm them? Our house was broken into three times .. our dad was not there due to Polygyny
assalam i had an aranged marraige,tried to make it work .times were hard,yet i thought we were ok He always talked about second marraige, so i listened did not act jealous or anything,Then he started sitting at this place where he went and sat and everyday he would sit and talk to this woman. I tried to talk about it but he shut me up and started acting real nasty,He was rude and disrespctful to me.I would pass and see then sitting on her veranda and act like i could not see.i stopped going that way.He married her after 10years of this behavior I am 48 and have been married for 28 years i have children who are ready to marry and you know the most painful part is that for most of my married life financially we have struggled,i moved to india with him and stayed and this is what i get . pray to Allah the almighty for guidance
This was not the way it had to be.If he couldnt fix issues with first wife ,he shouldnt get another.Secondly,i have seen abusive men rant more about polygamy rather than virtous ones.They are hypochrites who wont even offer salah which is fard but run after marraiges which can satisfy thier lust without fulfilling responsibilities associated with it.Obv,it is the easiest way to bind and abuse a woman for a selfish lazy adulterous man.A man who really fears Allah knows that any shortcoming from his side he would be answerable in eternity.
You can’t make a issue of him marrying mother wife if he i guiding your right if he’s not then u have every right to be upset. He was flirting for 10 years or so that was wrong . Marrying her afterwards she don’t see that as wrong
@@asmaaziz6380 thank you my dear. Cause my understanding of polygamy was, financially stable. Equal. In everything. And yes we never talk about the neglected fard
sorry this lecture was given wrong.. if he's going to cheat because he can't have another wife, then he doesn't even deserve his first wife.. and that's HIS FAULT for not respecting the limits of Allah and fearing Him.
I am totally agree with you! Even Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam did not allowed to Ali radiyallahu to have second wife. He said if you will have second wife then first divorse Fatimah. If someone sadden Fatima, he sadden me. After that Ali radiyallahu anhu stopped to have second wife. end of discussion !!. Prophet Muhammad did not give lecture to his daughter Fatimah “look Fatimah this is allowed in Quran, Ali has the right to have second wife..I have also many wives..etc” No! Even Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam id not allowed Ali to have second wife, because her daughter did not wanted and sadden. Can we now say that Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam said something against Quran!? Of course No!! This shows how prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam respect the feelings of women, this shows that even the father of women are allowed and can step in to let divorce in such those kind of cases. And also yes Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala allowed to have up to 4 wifes BUT IF THE MAN WILL BE JUSTICE EACH TOWARDS HIS WIFES. AND ALLAH SUBHANEHU WA TA’ALA ALSO MENTIONED THAT ONE IS BETTER IF MAN WILL NOT BE JUSTICE! It is also mentioned clearly in Quran Surah Nisah 4/129 that “ NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU WANT TO, YOU CAN NOT AFFORD TO TREAT WOMEN FAIRLY”. Why no one is talking these Ayats!? Can a man give guaranty to treat in justice with both wives!? Emotionally, economically etc..I dint think so! We live in a such bad era that everyone knows clearly that most of man even almost every man can not be justice. If someone can not be justice then it makes something halal to haram. So please before given ONE SIDE (men perspective only) psychological explanation, think both sides psychology like in ayah 4/129 and Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam did. also please share the ayah to men Nisa 4/3 and 4/129 first and the experience that Ali, Fatimah and Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam had before, and also men have to know the responsibilities, the rights of women, if he will treat unjustly then in akhirah there are big big big consequences..why no one mention this!?! MaN hs to know these consequences So that men can see the truth, not see one side of selfishly “I am man it is my right”. Even with those kind of ( one side men perspective) explanations shows the injustice towards women. So please be Justice like mentioned in Quran Al Kareem. Also this is not a right for men this is just a permission by given Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala. Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala knows best.
@@AAslan-wd2zeI agree with you, they won’t look at when the prophet pbuh didn’t allow Ali ra to re-marry considering that was the actual time when women really needed support. Also I heard not sure exactly the prophet pbuh also said he is worried fatima ra iman ( faith ) will be effected with this, but then what about our faith. I do agree polgmny can sort out a lot of problem but it’s also caused a lot of problems as marriage is based in lust which lust is not ever lasting and eventually men may decide to divorce as it’s to much headache which some women are finding out now who be secret wives then they get divorced as divorce is in the man’s hand too. I have teenage daughters and will In’shaa’allah ensure they are educated
I think that basically women shouldn’t make their whole life revolve around their husbands. We need to get romantic ideas out of our heads, maybe we as married women need to wake up and have something else in our lives too, be it work, education, interests, businesses, open up our own social networks and basically have a life. The nature of men is different to that of women. Maybe we should just face it. But that doesn’t mean they are allowed to have affairs and marry their mistresses. We all know the strict Islamic ruling on adultery. Stoning to death is not a joke. Children need to be around their fathers and it’s more difficult if parents get divorced. One wife is more straightforward and satisfying for most men. But if the man is very rich it’s not a bad deal, you could get your own house out of him, children, have a career and get intimate when needed. It’s sounds horrible but it is logical. This is not paradise, this is duniya. Just bear in mind the punishment for adultery. It’s all a test and Allah swt knows best. What do you think?
Completly agree ! I've been through heartache to now not really caring about my husband and it hurts him...he married behind my back said hurtful things about me to these women who then told me what he said and he said he did it because he was in a bad place begged for my forgiveness moving forward I've now had two more children for him and don't love him like I did when I first met him he now wants to make a real go of things be romantic and loving and constantly asking me if I love him I've told him the truth I don't not like before I see you as something halal for me when I need it (intermacy), your he father to my kids and were friends. He doesn't hold a important spot in my heart anymore and men need to keep that in consideration that their first wife will probably have her feelings change for him and focus more on her own life and children. Consiquence they have to deal with
Thank you sister so much for sharing your story. It sounds like you have had some difficult times and Allah has tested you but you have now found peace. May Allah bless you and reward you for your patience and may Allah swt shower his blessings upon you, your children and your family. You made a very interesting point about how your feelings changed once your husband had another wife. How could your feelings stay the same it’s just not possible. We can go through the motions but ultimately only we decide who will hold that special place in our hearts.
I am a revert Muslim a week ago, I don't know much about the Qu'ran yet, in my opinion, if our goal to the Jannah, then we will help each other to avoid sin. In Jannah the man has atleast two wives. This maybe very hard to women but it's also a way to perfect our unconditional love and acceptance. Peace. May Allah guides our heart.😔
MashaAllaah. may Allaah keep you firm on the straight path sister. Beautiful to hear sisters that come to this realization. You should thank Allaah for that.
@@marcelolb1221 As Salaamu Alaikum, this is a year ago .. Alhamdulillah Alhamdulillah 🥰, I was single when I became a Muslim, Alhamdulillah 4 months ago I married to a man who has deep consciousness of Allah SWT. I am pleased to read your reply brother. Jazakallahu Khayran.
@forestriver7180 My humble request don't reject your husband in sex. If you welcome your man with happiness in bed then he will less likely to involve with another women.
People think that only men are on fault here. Just last year, I was asked by sister to be her husband. She was willingly wanted to be a second wife because she couldn't carry kids. But just cos she couldn't doesnt mean she cant have desjres. If islam wasn't there. A non Muslim would have slept with her and she would be his side chick, islam comes and protects her right as a women. And it will be a win win for both sides. There are many examples. In uk non Muslims are sleeping around without having any protecting and then get hurt. Islam avoids all that.
Then she can marry someone who already has children but doesn't have a wife. In this way those children will get a mom and she will get both husband and child. She doesn't needs to jump on a married man actually 😒😒
You are right mate, people are acting stupid, at times, someone who is already married, looks a lot more responsible than someone who is divorced. People can like anyone they want. And if it is halal, then why not
You can better divorce him and let him go. And if you have childeren let them stay with you and stay in good friendship with the father from your kids, because a child need also the love from a father. And if you dont have childeren leave him. You deserve better.
@@EliteKozarcan it all depends on what you can handle. If you can't handle him having a second wife, if it is detrimental to your mental health and emotions which is causing you to resort to other sins then yes, you have every right to leave. Allah didn't say it was mandatory for a woman to stay with a man who wants a second wife, He just gave the man an option. And if a man has an affair behind your back and then divorces you after you find out, good! Its something to celebrate! You will be free from all that mess and move on eventually.
Quran understood in its entirety: treat others as you would yourself. So husbands ask yourself would you be ok if your wife has a second husband? That would be your answer.
@@zahara6355 of course but the reasoning of human understanding does not abrogate the clear explicit divine law of allah which is in the holy Quran. Even the wives of rasulullah had feelings of jealousy but they knew this human feeling cannot be a reason to justify their marriages to rasulullah as invalid (nauzubillah) they contained their feelings and not let it overtake them. Because they understood the law of allah on this matter
Sorry to hear this topic,;it's so painful to hear as a woman !muslim men doesn't respect the feelings of women they are selfish, ,,the word of Allah says :u can marry two or three wives as long as u can treat them equally n fairly,,they never understand fully!!remember u can't serve the two kings at the same time 😌😌
Men talk about sunnah, start with your fard also Muslim brothers ignore the sunnah of fasting on Monday and Thursday, they ignore the sunnah of praying 2 rakats before fair, they forget that Tahajjad is a sunnah. The only sunnah brothers remember is polygamy.
It’s hard to find an Imam these days that will perform a nikha for a couple that wishes to marry in the way of polygamy. I’ve have had and seen so many doors shut and slammed in our faces. InshaAllah we find one that believes without judgment. Ameen.
My conclusion of this is that Islam caters for a man's satisfaction so much that he can have four wives just to prevent him from adultery so us women have to suffer for this, sorry but most women whether it is allowed or not will leave their husband. Why does Islam not cater for a woman what her desires, what if she wants her husband to be hers and hers only. Women will be jealous its just in us, we have emotions so why does Islam not recognize a woman's emotions and not cater for them we are very sensitive. To accept this for a woman is extremely hard. Can someone respond to this on why Islam does not cater for a woman and focuses on a man since they can't control their sexual desires. women also have sexual desires why can't a man fill his desires with one women or is that not even enough for them. I am Muslim and I want to follow everything that my religion tells me but blindly following this is simply ridiculous. Let me guess then everyone is going to say well its a test for us women. So where's the test for a man to only have one wife and control himself.
Sister, its allowed for the women to forbid polygamy in their nikah. If he ever gets married again, remember you can get a KHULA. Don't EVER feel like ALLAH hasn't given you a choice. Allah's Rahma is always open to His slaves. I am also a Muslim woman, and i also can, to an extent understand where you are coming from. It is not right to put all women in the same box, as if they have no desires and that they are only married to reproduce Some women love SEX just for the sake of SEX. not to have children. Not all women are submissive. Some women are independent, and are fully capable of taking care of themselves. But you need to remind yourself, that humans changed the original meaning of marriage. We developed and mixed it with 'LOVE'. The origin of marriage is to reproduce, simple as that. nothing more, nothing less. Romantic love, on the hand is a notion we invented, and deep down, what you call love is nothing more than a chemical reaction that compels animals to breed, it hits hard then slowly fades away leaving you in a failed marriage. Hum However, with a rational mind, you have to understand that with Allah legislations, there are wisdom behind them. For example, polygamy is a solid, constant reminder from Allah (SW) to women that you life does not revolve around a man, rather all of Your HEART should ONLY be filled and belong to Allah, and not his creation. I am not married, and i will not get married, as i don't have a desire for it. BUT, back to the point, remember!! men will always disappoint you, and Allah will NEVER. So, only put your dependency, hopes, and expectations only in Allah. Don't get attached to other than Allah. Walah, you will free yourself from shackles and disappointments and sadness and all negative emotions when you don't have expectations or demands from from people. why, because, ppl will disappoint your, in one way or another, and that will lead to to your downfall. Only rely on Allah, and remember all the problems you face in life, that seem big and unsolvable, are only temporary. state of happiness and sadness are temporary, and we will die and met all our Lord, and go to our final abode. Sorry, if I have said anything wrong. May Allah bless you and me, and guide us all into the right part. Read the book: reclaim your heart by Yasmin Mogahed
Saarah X In Christian : Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines .Abraham, Jacob, David, Solomon, and others all had multiple wives. In hindu : lord krishna had 10,000+ wife's. ! So which religion is better!? K let me know where r u from?
I agree with Nora. MARRIAGE IS NOT JUST ABOUT LOVE. This is what BOTH men & women need to understand. Also, speaking as a man, men do desire to be intimate a lot. There are polygynous families out there that do get along. NOT because we want more sex or more love, BUT BECAUSE WE WANT TO SUPPORT ANOTHER ONE.
In summary: 1) Be aware of your own personal biases. 2) Don’t trivialise, taboo or “weaponise” the topic. 3) Raise healthy discussion without any foregone or assumed conclusions. 4) Come to terms with Allah’s ﷻ thoughts on the matter by both Reasoning & Feeling.
Yes we have to talk. But Even Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam did not allowed to Ali radiyallahu to have second wife. He said if you will have second wife then first divorse Fatimah. If someone sadden Fatima, he sadden me. After that Ali radiyallahu anhu stopped to have second wife. end of discussion !!. Prophet Muhammad did not give lecture to his daughter Fatimah “look Fatimah this is allowed in Quran, Ali has the right to have second wife..I have also many wives..etc” No! Even Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam id not allowed Ali to have second wife, because her daughter did not wanted and sadden. Can we now say that Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam said something against Quran!? Of course No!! This shows how prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam respect the feelings of women, this shows that even the father of women are allowed and can step in to let divorce in such those kind of cases. And also yes Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala allowed to have up to 4 wifes BUT IF THE MAN WILL BE JUSTICE EACH TOWARDS HIS WIFES. AND ALLAH SUBHANEHU WA TA’ALA ALSO MENTIONED THAT ONE IS BETTER IF MAN WILL NOT BE JUSTICE! It is also mentioned clearly in Quran Surah Nisah 4/129 that “ NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU WANT TO, YOU CAN NOT AFFORD TO TREAT WOMEN FAIRLY”. Why no one is talking these Ayats!? Can a man give guaranty to treat in justice with both wives!? Emotionally, economically etc..I dint think so! We live in a such bad era that everyone knows clearly that most of man even almost every man can not be justice. If someone can not be justice then it makes something halal to haram. So please before given ONE SIDE (men perspective only) psychological explanation, think both sides psychology like in ayah 4/129 and Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam did. also please share the ayah to men Nisa 4/3 and 4/129 first and the experience that Ali, Fatimah and Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam had before, So that men can see the truth, not see one side of selfishly “I am man it is my right”. Even with those kind of ( one side men perspective) explanations shows the injustice towards women. So please be Justice like mentioned in Quran Al Kareem. Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala knows best.
@@islamcuentametuhistoria6675 No, don’t judge based off modern society, return to how the prophet ﷺ lived and what he viewed as right and wrong. His wives nor did the wives of the companions found it torture. Rather this is a modern woman problem based off your upbringing.
@robthebob4586 Actually, if you read the Hadith, the Prophet SAW and his wives had hard times with each other many times so much so that he did not come home for a month. Many of the Prophet's SAW wives thought he was being too inclined towards Aisha (RA) (though he wasn't and they just felt that way). His wives repented and sought to focus on the hereafter instead. The Prophet SAW was so attached to Khadija RA that he outright couldn't stop talking about her in front of Aisha RA even after Khadija RA had died. The Prophet SAW told Aisha RA that Allah did not give him a better wife than Khadija RA. So even though, overall, with the will of Allah, the relationship of the Prophet SAW and with his wives was loving and successful, it is wrong to say it was all smooth sailing and that there weren't problems during the marriage
If a The Most High allowed men to have more than one wife so they don’t fall into sin, then if a man has the tendency to always want another, then who’s to say that after the fourth wife he will finally be able to control his natural tendency and not still fall into sin? Since you all say The Most High only allows a man 4 wives, could someone please answer this
He will want more than four. But Allah capped him at four for time reasons so each wife gets her time. Its not a hindrance because he is free to divorce any of them.
@@margarethelmuth7337 men get 72 hoorul ein wives they're beautiful with round shaped milky breasts and beautiful soft butts and other women assets which men are attracted to. They protect their chastity for their husband and always pray for him.
these days MAJORITY OF MEN have low taqwa n those that get married twice do injustice to both wives esp first wife...but they learn the hard way wen they do injustice and destroy a happy home they REGRET it after a year or so ...after the fun is over n have to live with wat they created.GOOD LUCK to them.i know lots of men who cannot keep up with justice .even if a man looks after one wife in rhis day n age esp in first world countrys its a massive deal.
@@missbutt8214 hahah lol what do you mean fighting? Yes I understand that you want me to shut my mouth because you cant handle the truth, because you have no contra argument, your the archetype women, don't expect you to understand, ciao
No, I think a woman would feel bad about it if her husband does things in secret and covers up wrongdoing. When he is not clear about his intentions with you or another woman. If he is truthful and clear on the matter from the beginning there would not be any issues. It's if he starts to lie or hide the truth that it hurts a woman's heart.
I think parents need to realise just to get children married at a very young age often doesn't settle well please let them grow in age and maturity then as they learn they can make the best partner choices usually in the beginning there is sheer excitement about love but few months or a year into it your miserable and not happy please please allow your children abit of space to grow and mature
Why would it be difficult for a MARRIED man to control his desire? What is it that a second wife could give to the husband but the first wife can't? How is it possible that a healthy woman is not enough to fullfill a husbands desire?
@@lalelu9053 I'm agree with you. But nowadays men grow up in horny fabricated environment. So it's hard for men(most) to overcome. This is common issue mostly women does not understand.
Wallahi I am so dissappointed with this imam. I know there are imams out there who talk about this subject in a logical way. While this? This just rotates about the sexual desires of men. What are you doing to Islam? You misinterpret our deen.
Islam does not shy away from sex!!! The Quran talks about it!!! When the scholars say things that concur with your desires you are happy and run behind them and when your feeble understanding fails to comprehend the vast oceans of ilm Allah subhanahu wa tala has placed in the scholars you become disappointed with them. I would be pleased to inform you the scholars of deen have earned the pleasure of Allah and are in no need for your pleasure or your approval. You need tp swallow your ego, desire and pride and humble yourself before the ulama inorder to benefit. If you say his lecture is wrong bring your proof from Quran and Hadeeth!!! A brother in Islam.
Alhamdulillah this worthless slave of Allah has studied this great deen under the ulama and from the little knowledge that i have been blessed with through the Ulama i can say the sheikh is right in what he is saying
my husban he got married lady .he bring her to my house he told me she can work in our house .he say she is house maid .he never told me she was his wife.after 10 years I found out she is maried to him .she has 2 kids .I did refuse maried but I didn't like the lies.then I ask him divorce.
Good job!! These men does not fear Allah. And behave in bad way towards 1st wife. Good job for the divorce. Make dua for a good brother to honor you only.
He did that because he knew you were cause problems if you knew. Men wouldn't do this kind of stuff if you women didn't get between them and their God GIVEN right.
This is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard in my life. Telling the wife that there is a danger in not allowing her husband to have another wife while she's married to him. Because her husband who can't control himself like a wild animal will look at porn, flirt and become a horrible person ALL because she won't let him get married and sleep with another woman. I got news for you buddy the man is going to do those things regardless if she let's him get married or not, because she is not the problem his Lust is the problem! Maybe instead of destroying his real marriage the first one and losing her respect, love and heart he should get himself under control and stop sinning..That would take care of the problem not giving him more women to lust after!
Allah has given men this right. what creation of Allah has the right to say he cant . and what about the rights of the widowed woman an the divorced women or the poorest women in our ummah ? do you think it better that they marry a non muslim just so you wont be insecure about your position in his life ?
Just Me if the husband is doing his duty to his first wife she dose not have any religious reason why he could not or should not . this conversation is not up for input from non Muslims . It was not up for discussion in the time of the prophet (saw) nor the four rightly guided caliphs .
i do not rejected poligamy..if the husband can treated the wives in fairly..why not.but in some cases i see some wife be treated unfair by their husband..some of them left without money to support themself and children..and they chased out from their house.
Good point. That's why Allah SubhanOTallah commands men if they fear they won't be able to do the justice (its very difficult) then marry only one. Bi the way Quran is the only Religious book which limits men, no other religious book does that.
@Anna Łuniewska; I am a man so, don't speak for me because you are wrong. A man can love more than one and its common for us / someone tells you otherwise believe me its not true for most of us.
Anna Łuniewska ...That doesn't even make sense and is not an objective statement. The Prophet (saw) married more than one woman, the accounts of his later wives and the accounts of Aisha (ra) shows that the Prophet (saw) did things for them that clearly showed that he loved them all. So your logic is flawed. Secondly you can't speak on behalf of men, if Allah has allowed a man to marry more than one then clearly he is capable of loving more than one woman and treating them fairly.
You are absolutely right... Islam allow only those man who can create justice between wives and equality... If someone can't afford or cannot manage or give equal support, time, companionship and financialy... Allah don't allow those people to marry ... It's Responsibility... Not a New Scandal... Its Great responsibility...
Yes,and if having second wife is so interesting and good and solves mens problems then the first wife should also go and become a second wife to someone else.Should not be a bad idea,though i am not against Shariah but feelings bind homes,needs make houses.
@Amirah M Women may not lust after men but its not necessary for her to love her husband.She may fall in love with other man who respects her and deals with her kindly.
@reem If you are able to read properly, which I doubt you can from your previous comments, I was commenting on her specific situation, offcourse the case is plural, but by your comment you have shown your real face :)
Whenever I ask men how they would feel if they shared their wife with 3 other husbands they say it's not allowed. They can never address the question how they would FEEL and we all know why that is.
It’s impossible for us to understand we can’t comprehend we are not women after all we are built differently a man can love multiple women a woman can not shes hard wired to love a single man that’s why women cheat a lot they fall in love with other men allah is the wise on he gave men this right for a reason
@@luqmanabdulahi5061 you did the same thing. You avoided the question. I’m not asking you to feel how women feel. I’m simply asking how would you feel if you had to share your wife legally with 3 other men. Just answer this simple question. Secondly, which data have you gathered to conclude that women cheat more. Even if it was true then that contradicts your own statement that women are designed to love one man. It shows that they can love more than one man otherwise they will stay with the one they have. Thirdly, if a woman does it it’s cheating but if a man does it it’s ok because he’s designed to love more than one??? What kind of a logic is that? Why don’t you simply admit that you like it cos it gives you more variety in women and you don’t like the same rules for women because you won’t be able to handle it. Atleast be man enough to admit it instead of making up silly logic to justify yourselves.
Look sis he didn’t answer LOOOL The truth is men don’t care about how women feel deep down. Men are selfish humans honestly. No one cares about how we feel no one. It’s come to the point where I don’t even want to get married no more.
@@sammo2713 loooool as expected. They will never admit to anything. They will never accept their selfishness and double standards. And they will never answer this question because it will prove that polygamy hurts women.
Just ask prophets wifes how they felt.... this is not a taboo subject... Being a man I cant feel how a women gives birth to a child, yes its a difficult I can understand and empathize... but thats the test in this life to obey the commands of Allah... even though second wife was not really a test in previous times... even now... its a thing which works for very small percentage of men and women... dont worry about it
I feel some imams simplify Islam so much. Where in the Quran or Ahadith does it state that men are allowed to get 4 wives merely because they are more “addicted” to their sexual desires? Our Prophet SAW never married the women he married because of his desires, they all had a purpose. Most - if not all - of his marriages were for saving the woman, who was most often a widow. Never have I heard of someone from the Sahaba that married just because of his desires. You guys ruin Islam and its reputation. Things are not that simple. “We created you in pairs” - do you forget this ayat?
Plz advice, wen he cnt provide, 1st wife, nd get d scd wife, nd his has taken my cash by lying about his work, iv help him for 30yrs , gv 5 kids, stil hd has batryed, wat to do
If one wife isn't enough for a man, he won't be satisfied with two, three, or four wives. he will always have wantering eyes for more. Why would women want to live in a household like that?
Not really. Polygamy has become a taboo now but hundreds of years ago, it was common in all cultures. It is allowed in all major religions. Our own ancestors had multiple wives. You can't say they were never satisfied or had wandering eyes. A wise and just man will be satisfied irregardless of how many wives he has or even without one. Nowadays having more than 1 wife is not preferred and not easy too. Islam allowed 4 wives but recommends only 1. Peace!
@@AbdulBasith2304 not all. Check your facts. There is poliandry even today in some countries/cultures. Those who practice poligamy are usually in religious cults and/or fundamentalists ,on the West. It's nota mainstream religious practice,it's considered backwards and outdated.
I have a important question about exta wife. Are there legal obligations and requirements that need to be fully and proven for financial stability meeting every obligations without taking away from the first wife's home. Possibly causing hardships and struggle? To prevent this from happening. Also and what if the other woman is having a different intention and can justify a legit reason, but could be intended to seek weatlh, fame, or a easy way out of their living situations, in order to seek support for themselves? Are there guidelines and expectations in other wives, that show My kind of experience that is similar to the first spouse? Meaning because anyone can use a man and marry them. But what if that other woman unknowingly can be the cause of privacy and security reasons to the first spouse? Is there a a background investigation and security questions and concerns? I do recognize that a lot of woman marry men to escape their living situation. Without recognizing that being a wife requires alot of responsibility.
Not correct everyone comes from different walks of life many people fall into big sins but have fear for Allah you cannot determine someones fear of Allah from the outside. People are put into tight situations in life and they react which ever way it may be. When the man killed 99 then 100 I do not agree that he dose not fear Allah because he wanted to change. But people have to be aware of the fact that others come from different backgrounds and understand actions differently and grew up indulging in different things. It's a very limited understanding to say something like this and many Muslims fall into kufr and shirk and bida but want to judge someone for a major sin where's the logic.
No one is making you feel guilty. If you have shut your husband out completely not even allowing him to express his god given right . Then that is wrong on your side. Get into your head Quran : that you may Like something and it is bad for u, and u may dislike something and it is good for u. Allah knows and you know not
B Tai Having desire to do something forbidden in Islam is not a sin until person starts planning towards the sin ,if the person fights of the sin evil desire and brings it back to line with gods guidance then the person will be rewarded for it by god and god will appreciate the efforts and won’t let it go to waste and acting on the forbidden desire is a sin.
@chavvah, so you want to maintain more than one husband Or is it that you just want to have multiple sexual partners? There is a difference. Allah dignified polygamy for men by stipulating that all the rights of marriage are observed so that she is not just a sexual object. There is no dignity in polyandry for women, only whoredom.
@@rjvillamor3982 the standard legal way a Muslim man gets sexual access to a woman is through marriage. So the difference is that the Divine mandate requires dignifying sexual relationships by marrying and fulfilling all the rights and obligations of a marriage. Since, in Islam, men have the responsibility of maintenance of women, he must have the material means to support the women he marries. So there is a lot of red tape between a Muslim man and sexual access to women that's designed to have a sobering effect on his impulsive desires.
There is a need for Men to be real Men and take more wives if they feel they cant control their sexual desires and will fall into haram. There is no need asking first wife for permission . Ok guys?
the best is to tame his ego and be happy with one, if he can't do that he have to be just to his wife, just treating equally is not enough, he has to be just to both of them, if he can't he's not allowed a second wife and its haram for him!
The problem is the deceit when most scholars teach to not even tell us and this is oppression.....Allah swt says in the quran "the believing men and women conduct their affairs by mutual consultation" .....how can you be a believer and hide something like that from your own wife, It is deceit if he didnt tell her his a polygamous man before he married her,like nabi saw wives knew he would take other wives and they still accepted to marry him.... the problem is not polygamy but the deceit...Allah sw .....whoever says a women daoesnt have a choice has no empathy or mercy because no women wants go be alone half her life...nabi saw split each day and split each night so women were not alone every second day because we have needs of love and affection just like he has desires for sex everyday not every second day.Many scholars dont talk about the womens rights to love and affection,how can you be alone 50% of your life thats oppression.No one gets married to be alone.
@@mirzabaqir5159 "If you fear you might fail to give orphan women their ˹due˺ rights ˹if you were to marry them˺, then marry other women of your choice-two, three, or four. But if you are afraid you will fail to maintain justice, then ˹content yourselves with˺ one1 or those ˹bondwomen˺ in your possession.2 This way you are less likely to commit injustice." Quran 4:3 Clearly incorrect. First thing that is mentioned is orphaned women whose rights you cant give unless you marry them. If you cannot deal justly with them after marriage then only marry one. Polygamy is not to fulfill a mans desire as he can fulfill that alone with wife, he does not need another as he cannot handle another for that is a dangerous fantasy. He does not have means or mental faculties required to handle more than one relationship, it's near impossible for the average man. There is nothing here stated about a mans desire but for the women who seeks protection through marriage either for herself or children.
@reem We're not talking about the terms of a contract, but what's allowed in Islam. Now show me verses for your claim, or accept the fact that in Islam he does not need her permission nor tell her.
@reem It is NOT allowed in Islam unless it is included in the contract. If you claim it is allowed in Islam then show me a verse or a hadith that states he needs your permission or even tell you before taking another wife. It is solely his right and he can do whatever he wants. He chooses to give up this right if it is stipulated in the contract and he agrees to it. No, it is not cheating. Cheating is him engaging in adultery. It is not cheating if he goes and takes another wife without telling you. It's his right alone with no connection to you. He can also divorce you without talking to you about it, that's his right. Stop trying to invent your own Islamic Shariah. If you think otherwise then bring your PROOF from the Quran and hadith. The Prophet did NOT stop Ali (r.a.) from taking another wife. Fatima (r.a) was not upset because her husband was taking another wife. She was upset because he was marrying the daughter of Abu Jahl, the Prophet's worst enemy. Don't try to twist religion for your agenda. Listen up guys, if women are going to take your rights away by stipulating in the contract that you can't take another wife then don't marry such a woman, and let her be alone forever. If you do agree to marry her then you TOO can make stipulations in the contract. You can stipulate that if she works or comes into possession of money or property then she has to give you a share. How much share? 75% since she's taking 75% of your right to additional wives (3 more wives). Remember, women, we too can play this game.
Rare it is you would find a Muslim men marry more than one wife RARELLLLLLLLLLLY, and however the women numbers are far greater than men. What solution would you provide for women who don't have husband? Not marry at or poligamy or just play around to spread corruption. And who gives you right to decide for a women but she herself has the right. A woman may don't want to be part of poligamy or may be she don't mind; who are you to decide for her? Islam is not a fairy tail religion but a practical solution for this life and successful life in hereafter. Do your research, in western countries a men/women before he settles down with one how many partner he/she already has? yet you are against poligamy because you don't care about your other sisters in humanity who will be left out without a husband and on top of it what's the divorce ratio western society? Now even the concept of marriage is depreciating from society. And for my sisters; if you think you would live happily after a marriage, please understand this life is test (good/bad both shall come as a part of it) and soon you shall meet your creator Allah SubhanoTallah. If you follow Allah Subhano Tallah's commandments you will go to Jannah and where you will get everything you desire, a true happiness forever beyond your imagination. May Allah guide us all. Ameen.
What if the number of male exceeds in a society should a woman starts marrying and settelling those poor men......? DONT limitate it to sexual desire as well as many studies show women also have same sexual desires than men in some case even more? if it was about desire it should be for both but Allah allows polygyny with his devine knowledge it is permissible in some cases not farz other wise if it was so necessary and men are biologically like that he would have created more wives for Adam A.S as well but the begining of mankind was from one man and only his one wife......
Will a woman die if she does not get married?🙄🙄🙄. I don't think so. It's better to live alone and submit yourself to Allah then destroying other's family.... lol
My wife has been very clear about it..if I ever want to have a second wife she will not have problem with that it's just that she will leave me without creating any trouble for me as she will not be able to handle share me with someone else ..Well I don't want a second wife and I will never leave her coz she is my Queen and I want be with her in Jannah inshallah..she is the best thing that has happened to me..Women do understand that Allah has given them the right to have more wives but women also have the right to leave if they cannot bear..
Ladies don’t put yourself in this situation and these Alams will never help you or understand you. Just stipulate it in your marriage contract that your husband can’t take another wife. This legal in Islam but they never tell you after all man are man.
May Allah guide us. There will always be beauty in polygamy but it's us who don't understand or see the beauty. Polygamy gives us a halaal person to sleep with, we are all human at the end of the day. So that on its own is good reason to work through our problems. I know of a single woman with kids who asked a man take her as a second wife just so that she can be in a halal relationship. Unfortunately he didn't agree, but was willing to enjoy her in a haraam way. Astagfirullah May Allah protect us. So when are married we get ungrateful and want more, but when we are single for long enough we get hopeful for even a little bit, whatever it is we should never ever be in a haraam relationship. If we single a haraam relationship should never be considered, Inshallah. So if we consider our Imaan and the Imaan of the ummat we will see the beauty of polygamy, although it is a big responsibility and if do decide to take part we have to take on the responsibility it comes with, the responsibility of ensuring that all people under your care, wife's and kids, have their Imaan protected and are taken care of. May Allah guide us.
oh wat an ansr i cn nt even undrstand that why a man would hve desire for another aftr ol he hve one you are wrong mister behind there is an another ansr bt nt this one husband shuld lower his gaze as he gt to know that an unknwn women is standing in frnt of him
I'm 2nd wife of my husband before I become second wife I got divorced from my 1st husbands cos hes drug addict and I'm having two daughters my 2nd husbands expect my daughters too but my husband 1st wife knows about our marriage now she's create too much trouble for us she's force my husband to divorce me she's don't have kids cos of medical problem.... I expect my husband 1st wife as a my elder sister but she's gives too much bad Duas my daughters and me now she say to my husband if he's not divorce me she's will b do suicide my husband don't talk Me now he says to me do saber..... What should I do why halal things is so impossible I want to asked women 2nd wife doesn't have heart? They don't have feelings ? They don't have rights too live as a normal wife? Is Islam gives us this teach?
Can't you earn and live by yourself? From your description it seems your second husband loves his first wife. So you shouldn't actually meddle between them. Ask him to help you get some work that you can to provide for yourself and your daughters. Teach your daughters to be independent by setting yourself as an example. No woman will tolerate her husband with other woman. If you were at her place you would have also done the same. So don't blame her and leave them alone
@@sultanajinnia9821 seek Islamic counseling or just get ready for hellfire you liberal turd. Earning for a woman is prohibited in Islam specially if it's breaking laws of Hijab (which includes Face) when a Man is providing for her. Taliban shall fix the hypocrites like you, Islam doesn't need such libturds
Please brother answer the question why does Allah say if you can't do justice between them only take one. As I understand it we worship Allah to protect us from committing sins such as zina. It's not a women's job to worry. what sin her husband is committing. But to worry about protecting herself from sins. Please brother get back to my question
I better break up the marriage instead of sharing I don't agree with this mufti he is telling in a wrong way...making women angry with his such speech. ..Allah allow woman to take "hula" (divorce )...if I have to choose I better leave the man who wants 2nd wife...if Allah gave rights to men to marry more than one then at the same time Allah allow women to leave the man who we don't want to live with anymore
Sasa Khan I think u should not only read but also understand the issue before bullshitting on here, Islam is not what u want, It is what is given. A woman can sure ask for a divorce, but if it's granted or not is a different issue. This issue is that of ijma of sahaba. U find islamic rulings to be for animals, astagfirullah, what else can I say We should live as Allah wants us to, not make Allah accept what we want lol Ur claim here also means women of sahaba were animal or what? U should work to think more like a woman and not like a man, it's a sign of the hour that men will imitate women and women will initiate men, and this is exactly what I see with ppl and this issue these days
Quraishi to think like a woman? So you think a man has different feelings? Completely different mind? You would be surprised... Maybe you should think that times have changed and in those days there aren't many widows and orphans that need the help of a wealthy man... These days Muslims marry second wife's for lust and not to help them out so maybe they are the ones who should stop bullshitting and start living by the rules and not abusing rules from other centuries...
Quraishi Where is the point in keeping a wife, who has no longer any love for you in her heart, who lost her respect for you and will never be able to trust you again? Where is the point in forcing yourself on a wife who is disgusted by you and your polygamous marriage and can't bring herself to be intimate with you? Isn't it better to give this wife her freedom? Or do you thrive on the pain and suffering you caused her?
i am a born muslim my question is islam is a religion of peace right and the biggest sin is to hurt some one's feeling then how this kind of religion allow men to hurt women as no women in the world can share her husband i follow islam alot before marriage but after getting marriage i just came up with the thought that whether i am in the right religion just because of this concept of second marriage May Allah guide me to the right path answer will be highly appreciated
Noor-ul-huda khan in the past men often died in battles and left their women behind without any money... So wealthy men married them to help them. Times have changed, but men still abuse the old "law" just because they can and most of them won't even care about your feelings or even about God... No matter what they claim.
Noor-ul-huda khan ...Islam means submission of your own will for the sake of Allah. Part of being a true Muslim is to accept what Allah has ordained, whether you like it or not and without any harj in your heart. Feelings are taken into consideration but it is not the biggest thing. It is only encouraged not a prerequisite.
Aslam u Alaikum sister... Should I tell you one story? What if you married a man, and you have 4 child's. Time passed and they become bigger and onevday they become young.. There is only one boy and 3 girls.. The boy go abroad for better income.. And girls got married one by one... The last girl when come to marry... She loved someone... And and marry her loved one... But her lover was not loved her but Her money.. So he take her Properties and signed her for sake of her love before insulting,abused and torturing her. At the end she take HULA (divorce) from him... Now she is your most Lovely daughter but her heart was broken into peices... She went to die.... Cuz of what bad happens with her.. But she is muslimmah so she live.. Even though she don't wanna live more.. And you know that what is inside her mind.. You try to merry her again but our very own made specific society don't want to give their boys to marry the divorced girls.... (It's our society, in Pakistan)... May be there is same or different culture.... After 2 years... That girl don't even marry to anyone cuz there is no good proposal came for her.. What you will do with that daughter... Consider it if it's for your own daughter.... Well I will give you one more choice. After 2 years... One of her university friend knows about her condition... who knows about islam and Love Allah more than anyone in this world.. So he come to you and ask for permission to marry her (purposal ) that man is already Married but is practice deen and financially good and from good renowned family in your area. If it happens.. He ask you to merry her and he will wait for your answer.. What will you do? Will you allow that innocent daughter (divorced lady, unfortunately) to marry that man? Or will you take her into your home for her all life? Dreaming that there will be one Prince come for her and marry her.. And one day all things will be fine? Put yourself into that situation... Than understand that why Allah allowed This Wisdom based decision...
For as many wives as "he has" I want just as many husbands... Like the person underneath me said you shouldn't have a problem with that right?? I I think all women around the world should have as many husbands as their husband has wives.
Amber Terrell In Christian : Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines .Abraham, Jacob, David, Solomon, and others all had multiple wives. In hindu : lord krishna had 10,000+ wife's. ! So which religion is better!? K let me know where r u from?
@@MrDsheikh very logical. If the first husband spreads his butter thin between all the kids with all the wifes he has,as many do...they marry for pleasure not thinking about finances at all, then those wives need another husband to provide for them as well
I'm a reverted muslim .. 27years old... I wanted yo marry a single man . I was not brave enough to accept polygyny.. but i Got to know that some people only appreciate you when they knoe you have accepted islam but the don't accept you as a family because of their fear. Or whatever.. same happened with me .. i was searching for a muslim man . First they showed their interest but after that they rejected just bcz I'm reverted . Just when i started to think about polygyny . Now im learning more about polygyny
Dont. Do it. Its a criminal acct with your self. Because you will see the man. 2 times a week. And believe me that. Felling its the worst. In the live. In my experience. He was married before. And. He divorce and. I became. 1 wife. Guess what yes. He. Was getting married. Over. And over. Why i think. Because. The quit. And i just found out. And now he got married. Againg. Subahanallah. Don’t dooooo it. If you want peace and. Don’t hurt other woman felings
I don't know about others but being a women i said to my husband whenever u think i m not enough for u n ur family do another marriage bcoz we did love marriage n his parents dosn't accept me. I always said to him do second marriage girl of your parents choice but my husband denied n said this is big responsibility ek ki puri krlu woi bahot hai. In my opinion husband should be afraid of second marriage not wives. Bcoz it is seriously a big responsibility to love equally two or three wives fulfil their wishes equally n if u r not able to do u will be in hell in the world n hereafter.
@@covidcol3505 You get pregnant and reproduce then see how she feels about your feminine nature Men =/= women Gender roles are decided by creator not creation
@@robthebob4586 hit a nerve have i. women are a mans equal you want to keep them subjugated and at home and pregnant. men can have more fun but muslim women can't
if you are women then how to keep the man marry only one wife? if you are men how to keep your self marry only one wife? and why many women rejected polygamy???
Why would you want to deal with a bunch of women? Each woman has a separate personality, separate needs, separate wants ... why would you want that much responsibility?
I like Islam a lot but I think I will never understand this. I think women have desires too, not only men. I think it would be very painful to share a husband, is so horrible to think that maybe one's ilusions is to be everyday of your life with your husband or going to the market or your children school plays next to your husband taking his hand in public and you can't cause Monday to Wednesday is the second wife's days ??? What happen when in intimacy you are thinking what he is doing to other woman? And sleeping and dinning alone with the kids, is a happy life ?? And we must understand that Allah permits this. I just don't get it. I don't like it. Men, Muslim or not will die of jealousy, anger and disappointment if their women are touched by someone else, why they don't have empathy? Wouldn't it be fair if the first wife doesn't feel good divorce her husband ? Will he help her financially (I guess not). I just have so many questions for this topic, I wish I could be a Muslim but being a Muslim means I should understand and accept this. It's just so complicated, I have so many doubts about it. What happens if the man loves more one woman than another, 'cause no one can get through perfection, wouldn't be unfair ? The husband will rather be with the other, and he will be kinder.....
This Mufti is not telling a Muslim woman must allow her husband to marry a second wife, but only to allow the freedom of expression & beliefs of her husband on this issue. If the pair love each other so much and have a good married relationship then there would not be this discussion in the first place. The scholar also tells men they are stupid to keep fantasising to marry another wife and the couples to reconcile their differences. Fantasising other male or females is not Islamic as Allah said in the Quran not to even come near adultery and in the hadith literature even the gaze is restricted as in the Quran where both men and women are told to '..lower the gaze' see Quran 24:30-31. Islam encourages men to care for their wife and only marry one as it would be difficult to do justice to more, however Islam allows up to 4 wives only when there are valid reasons pertaining to 'orphaned' women with no one caring or protecting them and only if they can do justice to them which the Quran states clearly they will not be able to and so therefore, to only marry one.
sister, i would like to clarify little bit of ur doubt.....imagine a scenario where u have a younger sister who unfortunately can't manage a man for marry (may b it is due to her Uglyness or Handicap & so on..) , His waiting for marriage extent so long that She reached in her old age , may b it is 40 or 40+ .... How will u feel about your own sister who was not chosen as life partner by any man.....would u let her in this way for the rest of her life or you will let her to marry to someone who take her as 2nd wife (& u will quite sure that the person takes ur sister's hand is a pious, religious & responsible man )....SIMILARLY, We Muslims Consider all muslim sisters as OUR OWN SISTER ...so, we don't want to make any of our sister Looser ..... it is a sign of Magnanimousness of a pious sister who gives Priority to her fellow sister over herself EVEN IF it is a matter of SHARING Husband....More over it is the reality that there is so many millions of FEMALE overnumber than Male....u can't bypass the Reality.....
Marcela Nieto In Christian : Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines .Abraham, Jacob, David, Solomon, and others all had multiple wives. In hindu : lord krishna had 10,000+ wife's. ! Number of females r more so wat should other women do?
Marcela Nieto if you are Muslim then seek Allah’s Aid in accepting this. If you are not, then don’t worry about it, for issues nonexistent compared to not worshipping Allah or worshiping others beside Him. That is more pressing. Besides once you accept Allah, the you the Legislator of this issue being discussed Cares more about you then you do yourself. My Lord Merciful and Loving. And He wants good for you. Learn Who Allah is. Uh... from Muslims. They know who they worship five times a day in prayer more than anyone else. May Allah Guide you.
It's the same men that would be angry when their son has a way stronger relationship with the mother than himself and only looks up and cares about his mum...
Yes i believe that conversation can happen in normal way but not to threaten wife....Allah created only one hawa despite the men nature....what if wife finds other man attractive and wants to marry him it will hurt husbands feeling...what if man after having 4 wives still wants to have another because of his natural desire!!! A good happy family always has two partners that is one husband and one wife
Yes we have to talk. But Even Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam did not allowed to Ali radiyallahu to have second wife. He said if you will have second wife then first divorse Fatimah. If someone sadden Fatima, he sadden me. After that Ali radiyallahu anhu stopped to have second wife. end of discussion !!. Prophet Muhammad did not give lecture to his daughter Fatimah “look Fatimah this is allowed in Quran, Ali has the right to have second wife..I have also many wives..etc” No! Even Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam id not allowed Ali to have second wife, because her daughter did not wanted and sadden. Can we now say that Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam said something against Quran!? Of course No!! This shows how prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam respect the feelings of women, this shows that even the father of women are allowed and can step in to let divorce in such those kind of cases. And also yes Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala allowed to have up to 4 wifes BUT IF THE MAN WILL BE JUSTICE EACH TOWARDS HIS WIFES. AND ALLAH SUBHANEHU WA TA’ALA ALSO MENTIONED THAT ONE IS BETTER IF MAN WILL NOT BE JUSTICE! It is also mentioned clearly in Quran Surah Nisah 4/129 that “ NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU WANT TO, YOU CAN NOT AFFORD TO TREAT WOMEN FAIRLY”. Why no one is talking these Ayats!? Can a man give guaranty to treat in justice with both wives!? Emotionally, economically etc..I dint think so! We live in a such bad era that everyone knows clearly that most of man even almost every man can not be justice. If someone can not be justice then it makes something halal to haram. So please before given ONE SIDE (men perspective only) psychological explanation, think both sides psychology like in ayah 4/129 and Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam did. also please share the ayah to men Nisa 4/3 and 4/129 first and the experience that Ali, Fatimah and Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam had before, and also men have to know the responsibilities, the rights of women, if he will treat unjustly then in akhirah there are big big big consequences..why no one mention this!?! MaN hs to know these consequences So that men can see the truth, not see one side of selfishly “I am man it is my right”. Even with those kind of ( one side men perspective) explanations shows the injustice towards women. So please be Justice like mentioned in Quran Al Kareem. Also this is not a right for men this is just a permission by given Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala. Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala knows best.
What rubbish. GET OUT OF YOUR JAHALAT. The prophet *NEVER* gave Ali any ultimatum because he had no right to. *and fatima was NOT upset about him re marrying, thats WHY he sent a proposal in the first place*. He sent a proposal to a woman from the enemy tribe to the Prophet, and that goes against his Glory. Thats what angered fatima, she was angry for her fathers respect, not for Ali. Then Ali showed remorse for doing something so stupid. And after fatima died he had foir wives and hundreds of bondswomen
Where is the gratefulness to Allah when a couple are both satisfied, mentally, physically and spiritually but still the man is not contented. How can a wife be righteous, obey her husband and be guided to the Akhirah when her mentor do not follow every Islamic rule? (Ex. Being physically close to his female friends) and believe in polygamy.
ESSAN 29 do you have kids? When i get married i want to help a sister inshallah i pray it is a good sister so its one of those rare situations. Just telling u if u ever walk out.. Inshallah youll stay in a happy marriage ameen. I dislike it too but wud only like one good sister cuz i have a fear of having kids
what? i will never stay with him. are kidding me? if gets married its a proof that he does not love me. some men even encourage the first wife to be friend with his others wifves. hell no
The purpose of marriage in islam is not men's physical pleasure As said in Quran (......so that ye seek them with your wealth in honest wedlock, not debauchery.)(Quran4:23) Not for debauchery
"natural desires" is not a sufficient excuse. If 1 wife is not enough then there's no guarantee that 4 wives will be enough. people used to have more than 4 wives in the old "natural desires" times
@S K it’s kinda not funny actually. Men who marry multiple wives do so often only because they can and an opportunity comes their way. Not because there is something wrong with their first wife.
I agree with almost everything he says here. The problem is that women feel the same. The problem is the allowance men receive for feeling attraction to other women while women feeling attraction and desire to other men is seen as forbidden, evil, insane, etc. Human beings are human beings and maybe it is less in women. I'll agree with that. But women also want more men and enjoy the idea of more men. The belief that women are sex objects for their husbands instead of active sexual, emotional beings just like men are, is sexist and cruel. When a woman cheats on her husband it is the highest horror for Muslims. But they think polygamy is simply god accepting the sexual desires of men. Why doesn't Allah accept the sexual and emotional needs of both genders? People are people, not sexes. Some women want to be submissive and some women want to be dominant. Squeezing them into these roles regardless of personality creates a big problem. Islam came halfway, but it stayed too far inside its anti-woman semitic shell. Come out, Islam. Come out.
Kitura Aslam u Alaikum Sister, Let's see you will get what you want... You have 2 husband's... Okay Now let's see we make rule that one day is for 1st Husband, and 2nd day for 2nd Husband... Okay... After some months you will got Pragnent.... Will you tell me plz that Baby is from whose husband of yours? Who is the Baby's father?
The baby's father will be present in the child. And because they love me they will not care whose child it is and they will love it and love me any way.
Kitura don't you think that if a Baby knows who is his/her Real mother... Do the Baby have not the Right if he/she wants to know, that Who is His/her Real Father?... When that baby go to school, so if they management board enters the name of that Baby, whose name that Baby select? Or he will say that He Have 2 fathers.... And Can't compare from which father he came from cuz His Mother do intercourse with both of them same time.. Day by day... ? Just for discussion... Is that baby not feel bad about him/her? At least the offsprings know that whose their Real Mom and Dad... Don't they have that Right? In polygamy, at least the Babies know that who are their Real Father and Mother...
Aslam u Alaikum sister... Should I tell you one story? What if you married a man, and you have 4 child's. Time passed and they become bigger and onevday they become young.. There is only one boy and 3 girls.. The boy go abroad for better income.. And girls got married one by one... The last girl when come to marry... She loved someone... And and marry her loved one... But her lover was not loved her but Her money.. So he take her Properties and signed her for sake of her love before insulting,abused and torturing her. At the end she take HULA (divorce) from him... Now she is your most Lovely daughter but her heart was broken into peices... She went to die.... Cuz of what bad happens with her.. But she is muslimmah so she live.. Even though she don't wanna live more.. And you know that what is inside her mind.. You try to merry her again but our very own made specific society don't want to give their boys to marry the divorced girls.... (It's our society, in Pakistan)... May be there is same or different culture.... After 2 years... That girl don't even marry to anyone cuz there is no good proposal came for her.. What you will do with that daughter... Consider it if it's for your own daughter.... Well I will give you one more choice. After 2 years... One of her university friend knows about her condition... who knows about islam and Love Allah more than anyone in this world.. So he come to you and ask for permission to marry her (purposal ) that man is already Married but is practice deen and financially good and from good renowned family in your area. If it happens.. He ask you to merry her and he will wait for your answer.. What will you do? Will you allow that innocent daughter (divorced lady, unfortunately) to marry that man? Or will you take her into your home for her all life? Dreaming that there will be one Prince come for her and marry her.. And one day all things will be fine? Put yourself into that situation... Than understand that why Allah allowed This Wisdom based decision... Plz answer this too? I will be appreciate your answers...
I'm American and I am not Muslim. You have a problem with this because to you it is weird, but to me it is normal and to my children it will be normal. No problem.
You talk about how difficult the notion of polygamy is for women to even talk about ... but if it is actually true that God supports polygamy, WHY wouldn't it be natural for BOTH PARTIES??
Yes women can love more than one. We have desired too. We fear Allah and don't act upon them. Some women don't want more than 1. Some women do secretly
Carib Spice men don't have periods where they can't have sex with their partner. so if women stop having periods, become capable of becomibg pregnant with multiple kids from miltiple men at tge same time and stop having mood swings we can settle on the deal. tell me when you've accomplished that!
How inconclusive of a reply and how shallow to pass a personal remark on youtube. If periods stop at 30, which they don't*(unless somethings wrong with the internal system), you still have not told me how women can accommodate to carry multiple children from multiple men at the same time. This video is solely for people who accept Allah as their creator and accept themselves to be His slaves. If you're not a muslim yet then your purpose of coming here has to be to become one soon. If the purpose is to merely contradict then join the line of the billions who hate this mighty religion.
mohammed Taqiullah Shareef- early menopause doesn't necessarily mean there is anything'wrong' with a woman, at all, early menopause can be genetic and yes they may well stop even in the twenties, being uneducated on the matter doesn't change the facts, why would a women need to carry several children at once? the ability of carrying several children from alternate partners is not something marriages generally require as a prerequisite, there are plenty of people who marry knowing they cannot bear children/or have children in the case of men, at all, so whats your point. who said i'm contradicting anybodies religion, i'm merely contradicting you and your apparent stupidity,
Allah has made a way for everyone. Some women can exist as co-wives, most cannot. Some men dont want added responsibilities. Some want many wives, some dont even want one. Also, men weaponize this to use against their wives. Why not make your intentions clear? That i will marry more. That way there is no deception. The woman can decide if she will accept that or not.
This is the worst kinda explanation ever. Am sorry but it's like ur giving a clean chit to a man, just so that he desires he can torment a women. It's like my husband's desire is way more important than my sanity.
If you were not raised by a hindu mother and a zun mureed father, LITTLE THINGS would not make you insane. Thank God my daughters are not as worthless as you.
she was staying my house 1 year.she use to bring my house to her family .like her mother her sister her brother. I didn't know them .she use to bring them to show me .when I don't even know them.I ask my husband divorce becouse I wil never trust him again .so is haram to ask divorce .
Nadia Hassan sister it's not haram to ask for divorce.. If we have major reasons... I feel sad and sorry for your situation, Islam allows Husbands to Create justice between both... And he might not creating it. He must be fair with both of you and must be honest.. May you and hour Husband love each others more and start making good solutions to the problems...
Nadia Hassan sister ask him da reason y he had 2nd wife? In Christian : Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines .Abraham, Jacob, David, Solomon, and others all had multiple wives. In hindu : lord krishna had 10,000+ wife's. ! So which religion is better!? In our religion it is allowed only if he hv 4 requirements!
I lived in Lahore. Most married women always knew that their husband used to go to Heera Mandi for song and dance and more. This Haram and Halal discussion is out of place, when it is a part of life. The wifes knew it, and talked about it. Nothing she can do.
can someone answer my simple innocent question that if a man leave his home go abroad work hard day and night and finally after 10 or 15 years of hardwork get a strong position in that country and able to buy his own house car and property then one day a stranger who is very poor and need all these more then him came to him and he had to handover all these things to him or to share all his things with his poor muslim brother then what a man will do share it with stranger who have not gone through all these hardships or will happily give half of everything or full of it to that poor man who need it more????? come on guys what are you talking about stop using islam to fulfill your lust please stop using woman on the name of islam stop this nonsense specially this message is for islamic scholars who try to prove at any cost that prostitution is allowed in islam on the name of nikkah please stop this nonsense and girls and women stop being accused and used by such nonsense men like this man trust Allah take divorce and Allah will give you Nd your kids Rizaq inshaAllah
Noor-ul-huda khan In Christian : Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines .Abraham, Jacob, David, Solomon, and others all had multiple wives. In hindu : lord krishna had 10,000+ wife's. ! So which religion is better!? K let me know where r u from?
If nobody share property with stranger he can become a thief. Then he will be a threat to an everybody property. To avoid this Islam has solution which is logical.
As-Salaam-Wa'laikum brother what I want to know if a sister who is young herself and she has two kids and her husband wants to take a second which she's not happy abut but she know in Islaam man can marry 4 times. Now the thing is can she live near her family for help and she knows that she will be jealous and she don't want to course fitnah in the house. she don't want to live in the same town. Does she has that right to do that live where she wants to live
After became second wife where I lossed my whole future in Muslim sir .I am from hindu background who said many reasons and such valuable words to accept and made me loving after 2.5 yrs who said simply if want live or go .now daily crying life bro
Still today ,I did not live my married life with him at night as second wife because he s saying that first wife threatening by his children..then y Muslim people are marrying second person by showing some health issues to first wife and telling more reason that unsatisfied.... After now I am begging every day to him ..pls when u come home and also financial issues also came ..Actually I gave all my jewels and divorce money also to him ..after asking him to return who he made me feel begging every day with vegs fruits and rents also more ..... Actually many Muslims are using their 4wives allowed an Islam and they are slowly making women to love them by saying their troubles after first wife came and after they are ready to live with first wife only because society knows and they are getting another kind of profits by second wife and simply leaving them like widow .. Even ramzan month fully I were opening my nonbu days by requesting him lot then he braked the fast just 2 days ...I am from hindu background.... 2days only I had nonbu kanji by requesting him lot and had it...then also he scared with his time while they called .. One day if I have the kind of relationship then he will spend 1hr or just 10mins in hour home maximum. He s scaring for his first wife and daughter and finally as divorced women myside this also like widow . I am just biotech discontinuation women .so unable to go job ..having girl child 6 yrs which brought by first husband... Anyway I hate Muslim law and Muslim religion because only by these kind of people As well as I like all Islam women who follows their dress code and masjith prayer activities very strictly
Not acceptable... I mean a person if loving his 1st wife how can even think to have other one. Obviously one wife he takes will be his official wife and other will be in secret. How is it possible for another women to face it every day in just name of Islam n nikah while will she die every day? Yes she deserves the one who keeps her with complete dignity and respect.
Nero Ve nope. wrong...if you have a read about this matter in detail When looking at the etiquette's and the permissable and impermissable conditions during nikkah...Not allowing a man a right that ALLAH himself has given him is considered to be an impermissable condition regardless of whether it is on the nikkah contract or not. just saying
qash maz Just saying..its allowed there is a fatawa given from the Fatawa comitee of saudi arabia. you can read it.its in a summery of islamic jurisprudence 2 chaper 6 by sh. Salih al Fawzan. its also confirmed be sh omar suleyman and dr zakir Naik and a lot more. so its legitim!. Do you think you have more knowlege than these shuyukh..i dont think so. this topic is matter of ikhtilaf. you dont need to follow this but dont say its wrong becouse some of our great shuyukh allowed it and proofed it with the sahih hadith about the prophet where he forbit ali ra. to marry another women beside his daughter. by the way you can also forbid the sexual contact to slaves in the nikah. If you had read about this issue in drtail you would have known this. salam.
and in the hadeeth narrated from the Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) it says: “The Muslims are bound by their conditions, except a condition that forbids what is permissible or permits what is forbidden.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (1352). And he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Whoever stipulates a condition that is not in the Book of Allaah it is not valid, even if he stipulates a hundred times.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (2155) and Muslim (1504).
what is halal means? to merry second wife when you are not even enough for the first wife , I know man that was impotent he did not want to go doctor so he married second one to cover up .
libin alale the first wife is not obligated to stay with him if he's impotent. she should desire children and she can end the marriage and get someone potent
Mohammed Taqiullah Shareef Many men marry 2 when they themselves are on WELFARE. ..they marry two expecting Western governments to support one or both families...this is wrong on SO MANY LEVELS....I'm not for all the recent austerity measures in the UK but I AM happy that this will seriously restrict these ldiotic men..Islam CLEARLY stated you can marry more if you are FINANCIALLY ABLE.... not if your government is!
libin alale Also so many men here in the West marry again when they themselves are on WELFARE. ..what a joke...they give Muslims a bad name. ...they make out to authorities second isn't married ...so when she has kids they are illegitimate in the eyes of the law. ..imagine a n iqaabi sister going to welfare and saying I'm not married but pregnant....don't imagine its happened again and again and again.....it's sickening
May Allah gave us strength and help us to bring 2nd wife , and may allah help us to deal with bad situations ,. May Allah give me beautiful wife with good akhlaq , allah knows the best what is good for Us |
Allah gave the brothers this right yes he did it's in the Quran but also brother it says in the Quran of you can't do justice only marry one. And also in the Quran it says you will never be able to do justice even if you try to do so.
And then Allah says to be just as much as you can within reason and not to completely incline towards one and leave the other. Don’t leave things out to fit your own narrative.
@@robthebob4586 to the ones already married to more then one wife at that time why then would you put a woman through that by marry another woman when you have been warned you can't be just.
And it says if they come to an agreement as he can't be just. so that is a clear waring brother's can't be just. it's not fair to enter a marriage knowing you can't be just
@@aishanaja2074 Because after that Allah says do not completely incline to one over then other and try your best to be just. Hence why it’s explicitly stated in the Quran that men may marry 2, 3, or 4.
@@aishanaja2074 Not completely just bit Allah says to try to be as much as you can and not completely incline to one over the other. Quran 4:129 And it will not be within your power to treat your wives with equal fairness, however much you may desire it; and so, do not allow yourselves to incline towards one to the exclusion of the other, leaving her in a state, as it were, of having and not having a husband. But if you put things to rights and are conscious of Him - behold, God is indeed much-forgiving, a dispenser of grace
I think a lot of people misunderstood the shaykh. Please dont jump to conclusion... research more on why does Islam allows poligamy? In fact Islam is the only religion in the face of the earth which has the statement of marry ONLY one. In the Quran God says marry women of your choice in twos, threes, fours but if you cannot do justice then marry only ONE. Quran (4.3) It is not a must. It is optional. It is there to solve your problem out. Your probplem of surplus of women since so many of you men becoming gay etc... so Islam offers you solution. As muslims, we summit our will to the will and plan of Allah (God). Allah knows best.
This is big Haram , woman needs to live with the pain and suffer because of the man. And do not forget that we are living different time. Not time of prophet Muhammad. With that you are making woman to feel bad about herself . I’m leaving here in Arabs world and they are all suffering , being another woman . We are leaving different , women can talk , work being educated . Not a black dots who will just do what husband want. Women fight for your rights and do not let man wash your bran . You can always do better
Allah knows what's best for us we don't, if practiced correctly if a man is God fearing as a woman I think polygyny is a great solution to today's society whereby the number of women is far more jen men and today's there is so much fitnah so its hard very hard for our muslim brothers to protect themselves. We women must realize that yes its hard to accept but we have to submit to Allah that means submitting to His laws whether we like it or not . Inshallah the hardship is rewarded by Allah directly these women who are patient and submissive to their Creator.
I think y’all in the comments are mistaking that polygamy was revealed to quench out mens desires, it was not 🙂. It was actually meant to protect woman/and their offspring, that verse was revealed post war (after war) where many woman where left widowed and their offspring were left fatherless. Plus all the wives of the prophet were divorcees/widowed except literally (one)
It’s best to have this discussion before marriage in a halal manner so there are no issues after marriage.
I agree with you
Discussion is not required. Every Muslim woman should go into marriage knowing that her husband may at some point take another wife. if you discuss it before he may at the time not desire another wife, but it could change later in life and there's nothing wrong with it provided he is able to.
@@kharkaroto9486 For that reason, the women should put up a marriage contract and write this, if she does not want a cowife. This is the right of the women and every women should know about it.
@@selenamuller9012 personally I think that notion of putting in the contract doesn't stand. I will go away and research it, because it seems ridiculous to say the least. Putting conditions is understandable, outright prohibition is ridiculous. Anyway I would hope men would have the sense not to marry such a woman.
If women start doing this en masse there's going to be a lot of single women and rightfully so.
@@kharkaroto9486 if their is no war, there wont me " a lot of single women". The chances when getting a child are nearly 50/50 to get a boy or girl.
please understand women's also have a heart and feelings
sure, jealousy is a very ugly feeling isn't it?
@@EliteKozarcan
I believe in Allaah❤❤❤ The Most Just. The Most Loving, The Most Murcifel. Think about it. Men are arrogant they think that they had the right to marry 4 wifes. Who they think they are?? A3oudoubillaah min asjataan erajeem.
Laaillahaillellaah ❤ ❤ ❤
@@khadijabenassou8996 Are you aware that there are more female than male on this planet? Indeed who are these men who want to marry 4 women and grant them dignity and security, it's beter the take 1 spouse and date 3 on the side right? hahhaha you ignorence is beyond me
@@EliteKozarcan
Its not. Ther are more men then women. Allaah ❤ ❤ ❤ is The Most Just
I think its outdated (Polygyny) my mom was in polygyny with my dad and we saw him only once a month for one week. One week out the month was horrible. We needed our dads protection and he was with others wives. Why practice Polygyny when you can't protect your family amd leave them at the mercy of criminal to harm them? Our house was broken into three times .. our dad was not there due to Polygyny
assalam i had an aranged marraige,tried to make it work .times were hard,yet i thought we were ok He always talked about second marraige, so i listened did not act jealous or anything,Then he started sitting at this place where he went and sat and everyday he would sit and talk to this woman. I tried to talk about it but he shut me up and started acting real nasty,He was rude and disrespctful to me.I would pass and see then sitting on her veranda and act like i could not see.i stopped going that way.He married her after 10years of this behavior
I am 48 and have been married for 28 years i have children who are ready to marry and you know the most painful part is that for most of my married life financially we have struggled,i moved to india with him and stayed and this is what i get . pray to Allah the almighty for guidance
If that's so... May Allah reward you for your patience and steadfastness... And trust that Allah is All seeing, All knowing...
Divorce him sister. You're in a relationship with yourself and not your husband
This was not the way it had to be.If he couldnt fix issues with first wife ,he shouldnt get another.Secondly,i have seen abusive men rant more about polygamy rather than virtous ones.They are hypochrites who wont even offer salah which is fard but run after marraiges which can satisfy thier lust without fulfilling responsibilities associated with it.Obv,it is the easiest way to bind and abuse a woman for a selfish lazy adulterous man.A man who really fears Allah knows that any shortcoming from his side he would be answerable in eternity.
You can’t make a issue of him marrying mother wife if he i guiding your right if he’s not then u have every right to be upset. He was flirting for 10 years or so that was wrong . Marrying her afterwards she don’t see that as wrong
@@asmaaziz6380 thank you my dear. Cause my understanding of polygamy was, financially stable. Equal. In everything. And yes we never talk about the neglected fard
sorry this lecture was given wrong.. if he's going to cheat because he can't have another wife, then he doesn't even deserve his first wife.. and that's HIS FAULT for not respecting the limits of Allah and fearing Him.
I am totally agree with you! Even Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam did not allowed to Ali radiyallahu to have second wife. He said if you will have second wife then first divorse Fatimah. If someone sadden Fatima, he sadden me. After that Ali radiyallahu anhu stopped to have second wife. end of discussion !!. Prophet Muhammad did not give lecture to his daughter Fatimah “look Fatimah this is allowed in Quran, Ali has the right to have second wife..I have also many wives..etc” No! Even Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam id not allowed Ali to have second wife, because her daughter did not wanted and sadden. Can we now say that Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam said something against Quran!? Of course No!! This shows how prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam respect the feelings of women, this shows that even the father of women are allowed and can step in to let divorce in such those kind of cases. And also yes Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala allowed to have up to 4 wifes BUT IF THE MAN WILL BE JUSTICE EACH TOWARDS HIS WIFES. AND ALLAH SUBHANEHU WA TA’ALA ALSO MENTIONED THAT ONE IS BETTER IF MAN WILL NOT BE JUSTICE! It is also mentioned clearly in Quran Surah Nisah 4/129 that “ NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU WANT TO, YOU CAN NOT AFFORD TO TREAT WOMEN FAIRLY”. Why no one is talking these Ayats!? Can a man give guaranty to treat in justice with both wives!? Emotionally, economically etc..I dint think so! We live in a such bad era that everyone knows clearly that most of man even almost every man can not be justice. If someone can not be justice then it makes something halal to haram. So please before given ONE SIDE (men perspective only) psychological explanation, think both sides psychology like in ayah 4/129 and Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam did. also please share the ayah to men Nisa 4/3 and 4/129 first and the experience that Ali, Fatimah and Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam had before, and also men have to know the responsibilities, the rights of women, if he will treat unjustly then in akhirah there are big big big consequences..why no one mention this!?! MaN hs to know these consequences So that men can see the truth, not see one side of selfishly “I am man it is my right”. Even with those kind of ( one side men perspective) explanations shows the injustice towards women. So please be Justice like mentioned in Quran Al Kareem. Also this is not a right for men this is just a permission by given Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala. Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala knows best.
what Allah permits no one can make it impermissible.
Where are you from?@@AAslan-wd2ze
@@AAslan-wd2zeI agree with you, they won’t look at when the prophet pbuh didn’t allow Ali ra to re-marry considering that was the actual time when women really needed support. Also I heard not sure exactly the prophet pbuh also said he is worried fatima ra iman ( faith ) will be effected with this, but then what about our faith. I do agree polgmny can sort out a lot of problem but it’s also caused a lot of problems as marriage is based in lust which lust is not ever lasting and eventually men may decide to divorce as it’s to much headache which some women are finding out now who be secret wives then they get divorced as divorce is in the man’s hand too. I have teenage daughters and will In’shaa’allah ensure they are educated
I think that basically women shouldn’t make their whole life revolve around their husbands. We need to get romantic ideas out of our heads, maybe we as married women need to wake up and have something else in our lives too, be it work, education, interests, businesses, open up our own social networks and basically have a life. The nature of men is different to that of women. Maybe we should just face it. But that doesn’t mean they are allowed to have affairs and marry their mistresses. We all know the strict Islamic ruling on adultery. Stoning to death is not a joke. Children need to be around their fathers and it’s more difficult if parents get divorced. One wife is more straightforward and satisfying for most men. But if the man is very rich it’s not a bad deal, you could get your own house out of him, children, have a career and get intimate when needed. It’s sounds horrible but it is logical. This is not paradise, this is duniya. Just bear in mind the punishment for adultery. It’s all a test and Allah swt knows best. What do you think?
Completly agree ! I've been through heartache to now not really caring about my husband and it hurts him...he married behind my back said hurtful things about me to these women who then told me what he said and he said he did it because he was in a bad place begged for my forgiveness moving forward I've now had two more children for him and don't love him like I did when I first met him he now wants to make a real go of things be romantic and loving and constantly asking me if I love him I've told him the truth I don't not like before I see you as something halal for me when I need it (intermacy), your he father to my kids and were friends. He doesn't hold a important spot in my heart anymore and men need to keep that in consideration that their first wife will probably have her feelings change for him and focus more on her own life and children. Consiquence they have to deal with
Thank you sister so much for sharing your story. It sounds like you have had some difficult times and Allah has tested you but you have now found peace. May Allah bless you and reward you for your patience and may Allah swt shower his blessings upon you, your children and your family. You made a very interesting point about how your feelings changed once your husband had another wife. How could your feelings stay the same it’s just not possible. We can go through the motions but ultimately only we decide who will hold that special place in our hearts.
@@sharifahhunterify I feel bad for u. Don’t let these dogs fool u
I also don't care about my husband anymore, I don't love or care about him because he destroyed my life, I don't make time for him anymore.
Sounds horrible but logical sums up everything .
I am a revert Muslim a week ago, I don't know much about the Qu'ran yet, in my opinion, if our goal to the Jannah, then we will help each other to avoid sin. In Jannah the man has atleast two wives.
This maybe very hard to women but it's also a way to perfect our unconditional love and acceptance.
Peace. May Allah guides our heart.😔
Become Christian. We love our wife’s unconditionally. Because we love what God provides
@@PochoRepublic biggest lie I ever heard
MashaAllaah. may Allaah keep you firm on the straight path sister.
Beautiful to hear sisters that come to this realization. You should thank Allaah for that.
@@marcelolb1221 As Salaamu Alaikum, this is a year ago .. Alhamdulillah Alhamdulillah 🥰, I was single when I became a Muslim, Alhamdulillah 4 months ago I married to a man who has deep consciousness of Allah SWT. I am pleased to read your reply brother. Jazakallahu Khayran.
@forestriver7180 My humble request don't reject your husband in sex. If you welcome your man with happiness in bed then he will less likely to involve with another women.
People think that only men are on fault here. Just last year, I was asked by sister to be her husband. She was willingly wanted to be a second wife because she couldn't carry kids. But just cos she couldn't doesnt mean she cant have desjres. If islam wasn't there. A non Muslim would have slept with her and she would be his side chick, islam comes and protects her right as a women. And it will be a win win for both sides. There are many examples. In uk non Muslims are sleeping around without having any protecting and then get hurt. Islam avoids all that.
Then she can marry someone who already has children but doesn't have a wife. In this way those children will get a mom and she will get both husband and child. She doesn't needs to jump on a married man actually 😒😒
@@sultanajinnia9821 exactly, there are lots of single men with children that would make sense for her to marry, instead of someone else's husband 😑
You are right mate, people are acting stupid, at times, someone who is already married, looks a lot more responsible than someone who is divorced. People can like anyone they want. And if it is halal, then why not
@@sultanajinnia9821 not really. Cos she can live in her own space. Not live with them. Look at the bigger picture.
You can better divorce him and let him go.
And if you have childeren let them stay with you and stay in good friendship with the father from your kids, because a child need also the love from a father.
And if you dont have childeren leave him. You deserve better.
Sure, you deserved that man who has an affair behind your back and if you find out he divorces you, hahahha
@@EliteKozarcan it all depends on what you can handle. If you can't handle him having a second wife, if it is detrimental to your mental health and emotions which is causing you to resort to other sins then yes, you have every right to leave. Allah didn't say it was mandatory for a woman to stay with a man who wants a second wife, He just gave the man an option. And if a man has an affair behind your back and then divorces you after you find out, good! Its something to celebrate! You will be free from all that mess and move on eventually.
@@samia6888 agreed
That's why I love hindu men. They are kind hearted their love is pure.
Quran understood in its entirety: treat others as you would yourself. So husbands ask yourself would you be ok if your wife has a second husband? That would be your answer.
jealousy is one of the most ugly features a person has
Islam is not based on personal feelings. Its laws are legislated by the Quran and sunnah.
@@hamzahr6838 Quran commands us over and over again to use our reason, not just follow what others say
@@zahara6355 of course but the reasoning of human understanding does not abrogate the clear explicit divine law of allah which is in the holy Quran. Even the wives of rasulullah had feelings of jealousy but they knew this human feeling cannot be a reason to justify their marriages to rasulullah as invalid (nauzubillah) they contained their feelings and not let it overtake them. Because they understood the law of allah on this matter
@Kat J they probably have voor women hahah
Falling into Haram is not always the reason for men to take another wife.
Sorry to hear this topic,;it's so painful to hear as a woman !muslim men doesn't respect the feelings of women they are selfish, ,,the word of Allah says :u can marry two or three wives as long as u can treat them equally n fairly,,they never understand fully!!remember u can't serve the two kings at the same time 😌😌
yes you can, how about he leaves you for another one?
@@EliteKozarcan then that not really polygamy is it? He just wants the second wife because the first got old and ugly after bearing his children
@@avagray9705 you can be married to a old ugly women and cheat if you want
Men talk about sunnah, start with your fard also Muslim brothers ignore the sunnah of fasting on Monday and Thursday, they ignore the sunnah of praying 2 rakats before fair, they forget that Tahajjad is a sunnah. The only sunnah brothers remember is polygamy.
Women are not Kings
It’s hard to find an Imam these days that will perform a nikha for a couple that wishes to marry in the way of polygamy. I’ve have had and seen so many doors shut and slammed in our faces. InshaAllah we find one that believes without judgment. Ameen.
look on the internet, if someone is willing to do Nikah. make sure of course they are muslim. worked for us.
Why do you need an Imam? You need her wali and 2 just Muslim shohoud..
Why do you need an Imam? You need her wali and 2 just Muslim shohoud..
My conclusion of this is that Islam caters for a man's satisfaction so much that he can have four wives just to prevent him from adultery so us women have to suffer for this, sorry but most women whether it is allowed or not will leave their husband. Why does Islam not cater for a woman what her desires, what if she wants her husband to be hers and hers only. Women will be jealous its just in us, we have emotions so why does Islam not recognize a woman's emotions and not cater for them we are very sensitive. To accept this for a woman is extremely hard. Can someone respond to this on why Islam does not cater for a woman and focuses on a man since they can't control their sexual desires. women also have sexual desires why can't a man fill his desires with one women or is that not even enough for them. I am Muslim and I want to follow everything that my religion tells me but blindly following this is simply ridiculous. Let me guess then everyone is going to say well its a test for us women. So where's the test for a man to only have one wife and control himself.
Sister, its allowed for the women to forbid polygamy in their nikah. If he ever gets married again, remember you can get a KHULA. Don't EVER feel like ALLAH hasn't given you a choice. Allah's Rahma is always open to His slaves. I am also a Muslim woman, and i also can, to an extent understand where you are coming from. It is not right to put all women in the same box, as if they have no desires and that they are only married to reproduce Some women love SEX just for the sake of SEX. not to have children. Not all women are submissive. Some women are independent, and are fully capable of taking care of themselves.
But you need to remind yourself, that humans changed the original meaning of marriage. We developed and mixed it with 'LOVE'. The origin of marriage is to reproduce, simple as that. nothing more, nothing less. Romantic love, on the hand is a notion we invented, and deep down, what you call love is nothing more than a chemical reaction that compels animals to breed, it hits hard then slowly fades away leaving you in a failed marriage. Hum
However, with a rational mind, you have to understand that with Allah legislations, there are wisdom behind them. For example, polygamy is a solid, constant reminder from Allah (SW) to women that you life does not revolve around a man, rather all of Your HEART should ONLY be filled and belong to Allah, and not his creation. I am not married, and i will not get married, as i don't have a desire for it. BUT, back to the point, remember!! men will always disappoint you, and Allah will NEVER. So, only put your dependency, hopes, and expectations only in Allah. Don't get attached to other than Allah. Walah, you will free yourself from shackles and disappointments and sadness and all negative emotions when you don't have expectations or demands from from people. why, because, ppl will disappoint your, in one way or another, and that will lead to to your downfall. Only rely on Allah, and remember all the problems you face in life, that seem big and unsolvable, are only temporary. state of happiness and sadness are temporary, and we will die and met all our Lord, and go to our final abode.
Sorry, if I have said anything wrong. May Allah bless you and me, and guide us all into the right part. Read the book: reclaim your heart by Yasmin Mogahed
Saarah X In Christian : Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines .Abraham, Jacob, David, Solomon, and others all had multiple wives. In hindu : lord krishna had 10,000+ wife's. ! So which religion is better!? K let me know where r u from?
I agree with Nora. MARRIAGE IS NOT JUST ABOUT LOVE. This is what BOTH men & women need to understand. Also, speaking as a man, men do desire to be intimate a lot. There are polygynous families out there that do get along. NOT because we want more sex or more love, BUT BECAUSE WE WANT TO SUPPORT ANOTHER ONE.
Like the man said: how much do you believe in the verse that allows us to have more than one? Should we remove that verse?
Jess A and if your wife doesn’t except? Do you now make haram for yourself what Allah Made Halal? Refer to the first verse of At Tahrīm.
In summary:
1) Be aware of your own personal biases.
2) Don’t trivialise, taboo or “weaponise” the topic.
3) Raise healthy discussion without any foregone or assumed conclusions.
4) Come to terms with Allah’s ﷻ thoughts on the matter by both Reasoning & Feeling.
It's a reality and we should not be ashamed of talking about something that is halal
ikr most of these women would rather us do it in haram than do something in halal
Yes we have to talk. But Even Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam did not allowed to Ali radiyallahu to have second wife. He said if you will have second wife then first divorse Fatimah. If someone sadden Fatima, he sadden me. After that Ali radiyallahu anhu stopped to have second wife. end of discussion !!. Prophet Muhammad did not give lecture to his daughter Fatimah “look Fatimah this is allowed in Quran, Ali has the right to have second wife..I have also many wives..etc” No! Even Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam id not allowed Ali to have second wife, because her daughter did not wanted and sadden. Can we now say that Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam said something against Quran!? Of course No!! This shows how prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam respect the feelings of women, this shows that even the father of women are allowed and can step in to let divorce in such those kind of cases. And also yes Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala allowed to have up to 4 wifes BUT IF THE MAN WILL BE JUSTICE EACH TOWARDS HIS WIFES. AND ALLAH SUBHANEHU WA TA’ALA ALSO MENTIONED THAT ONE IS BETTER IF MAN WILL NOT BE JUSTICE! It is also mentioned clearly in Quran Surah Nisah 4/129 that “ NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU WANT TO, YOU CAN NOT AFFORD TO TREAT WOMEN FAIRLY”. Why no one is talking these Ayats!? Can a man give guaranty to treat in justice with both wives!? Emotionally, economically etc..I dint think so! We live in a such bad era that everyone knows clearly that most of man even almost every man can not be justice. If someone can not be justice then it makes something halal to haram. So please before given ONE SIDE (men perspective only) psychological explanation, think both sides psychology like in ayah 4/129 and Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam did. also please share the ayah to men Nisa 4/3 and 4/129 first and the experience that Ali, Fatimah and Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam had before, So that men can see the truth, not see one side of selfishly “I am man it is my right”. Even with those kind of ( one side men perspective) explanations shows the injustice towards women. So please be Justice like mentioned in Quran Al Kareem. Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala knows best.
Its halal. Not doubt about it. But its kind of torturing if. You are the second. Wife no problem because. You are the new toy
@@islamcuentametuhistoria6675 No, don’t judge based off modern society, return to how the prophet ﷺ lived and what he viewed as right and wrong. His wives nor did the wives of the companions found it torture. Rather this is a modern woman problem based off your upbringing.
@robthebob4586 Actually, if you read the Hadith, the Prophet SAW and his wives had hard times with each other many times so much so that he did not come home for a month. Many of the Prophet's SAW wives thought he was being too inclined towards Aisha (RA) (though he wasn't and they just felt that way). His wives repented and sought to focus on the hereafter instead. The Prophet SAW was so attached to Khadija RA that he outright couldn't stop talking about her in front of Aisha RA even after Khadija RA had died. The Prophet SAW told Aisha RA that Allah did not give him a better wife than Khadija RA. So even though, overall, with the will of Allah, the relationship of the Prophet SAW and with his wives was loving and successful, it is wrong to say it was all smooth sailing and that there weren't problems during the marriage
If a The Most High allowed men to have more than one wife so they don’t fall into sin, then if a man has the tendency to always want another, then who’s to say that after the fourth wife he will finally be able to control his natural tendency and not still fall into sin? Since you all say The Most High only allows a man 4 wives, could someone please answer this
That's why there are 72 hoor in Jannat whose beauty is always fresh. Alhamdullilah
@@theajaydeva I’m sorry, I don’t understand what do you mean by that?
@@theajaydeva Al-Hamdu-liLLĀH
He will want more than four. But Allah capped him at four for time reasons so each wife gets her time. Its not a hindrance because he is free to divorce any of them.
@@margarethelmuth7337 men get 72 hoorul ein wives they're beautiful with round shaped milky breasts and beautiful soft butts and other women assets which men are attracted to. They protect their chastity for their husband and always pray for him.
these days MAJORITY OF MEN have low taqwa n those that get married twice do injustice to both wives esp first wife...but they learn the hard way wen they do injustice and destroy a happy home they REGRET it after a year or so ...after the fun is over n have to live with wat they created.GOOD LUCK to them.i know lots of men who cannot keep up with justice .even if a man looks after one wife in rhis day n age esp in first world countrys its a massive deal.
than choose the right wives
These days majority women has low taqwa for going against the commandmebts of Allah
@@EliteKozarcan you're fighting everywhere.. can't you just shut your mouth
@@mirzabaqir5159 don't blame... thats not a good thing.. focus on your deen.
@@missbutt8214 hahah lol what do you mean fighting? Yes I understand that you want me to shut my mouth because you cant handle the truth, because you have no contra argument, your the archetype women, don't expect you to understand, ciao
No, I think a woman would feel bad about it if her husband does things in secret and covers up wrongdoing. When he is not clear about his intentions with you or another woman. If he is truthful and clear on the matter from the beginning there would not be any issues. It's if he starts to lie or hide the truth that it hurts a woman's heart.
offcourse the women doesnt lie en never hides anything, right?
Honest is the key but she would still get angry lol emotions are serious
I think parents need to realise just to get children married at a very young age often doesn't settle well please let them grow in age and maturity then as they learn they can make the best partner choices usually in the beginning there is sheer excitement about love but few months or a year into it your miserable and not happy please please allow your children abit of space to grow and mature
As a married muslim I agree what mufti said. It's very hard to control desire. May Allah save us from fitna!
Why would it be difficult for a MARRIED man to control his desire? What is it that a second wife could give to the husband but the first wife can't? How is it possible that a healthy woman is not enough to fullfill a husbands desire?
@@lalelu9053 if it's not a challenge for man to control desire then why prostitution is highly demanded whole over the world.
@@lalelu9053 alhamdu lillah Allah saved me from physical zina but it's still a challenge for many men. I'm stating this with responsible.
@@mohammedmafaz841 Ah ... I see ... It's not that one wife can't provide enough intimacy, it's just that you desire variety, right?
@@lalelu9053 I'm agree with you. But nowadays men grow up in horny fabricated environment. So it's hard for men(most) to overcome. This is common issue mostly women does not understand.
Wallahi I am so dissappointed with this imam. I know there are imams out there who talk about this subject in a logical way. While this? This just rotates about the sexual desires of men. What are you doing to Islam? You misinterpret our deen.
Islam does not shy away from sex!!! The Quran talks about it!!!
When the scholars say things that concur with your desires you are happy and run behind them and when your feeble understanding fails to comprehend the vast oceans of ilm Allah subhanahu wa tala has placed in the scholars you become disappointed with them.
I would be pleased to inform you the scholars of deen have earned the pleasure of Allah and are in no need for your pleasure or your approval. You need tp swallow your ego, desire and pride and humble yourself before the ulama inorder to benefit. If you say his lecture is wrong bring your proof from Quran and Hadeeth!!!
A brother in Islam.
Alhamdulillah this worthless slave of Allah has studied this great deen under the ulama and from the little knowledge that i have been blessed with through the Ulama i can say the sheikh is right in what he is saying
@Pink Salt sorry don't really understand what you mean...
my husban he got married lady .he bring her to my house he told me she can work in our house .he say she is house maid .he never told me she was his wife.after 10 years I found out she is maried to him .she has 2 kids .I did refuse maried but I didn't like the lies.then I ask him divorce.
Good job!! These men does not fear Allah. And behave in bad way towards 1st wife. Good job for the divorce. Make dua for a good brother to honor you only.
Truth will set you free Wow
"These men" who are they?
He did that because he knew you were cause problems if you knew. Men wouldn't do this kind of stuff if you women didn't get between them and their God GIVEN right.
What how it took you 10 years to find out?
He didn't do any sin by what he did. You, however, did do a major sin by getting a divorce without a legitimate reason.
This is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard in my life. Telling the wife that there is a danger in not allowing her husband to have another wife while she's married to him.
Because her husband who can't control himself like a wild animal will look at porn, flirt and become a horrible person ALL because she won't let him get married and sleep with another woman.
I got news for you buddy the man is going to do those things regardless if she let's him get married or not, because she is not the problem his Lust is the problem!
Maybe instead of destroying his real marriage the first one and losing her respect, love and heart he should get himself under control and stop sinning..That would take care of the problem not giving him more women to lust after!
Allah has given men this right. what creation of Allah has the right to say he cant . and what about the rights of the widowed woman an the divorced women or the poorest women in our ummah ? do you think it better that they marry a non muslim just so you wont be insecure about your position in his life ?
Kendrick Martin oh yes because giving them their rights means letting their husband sleep with other women..yeah umm no.. that is some messed up crap!
Just Me if the husband is doing his duty to his first wife she dose not have any religious reason why he could not or should not . this conversation is not up for input from non Muslims . It was not up for discussion in the time of the prophet (saw) nor the four rightly guided caliphs .
Just Me are you s Muslim ?
i agree with you
I also want to have second husband , when the right time to tell my husband?
Your mother must have been a Prostitute..
i do not rejected poligamy..if the husband can treated the wives in fairly..why not.but in some cases i see some wife be treated unfair by their husband..some of them left without money to support themself and children..and they chased out from their house.
Good point. That's why Allah SubhanOTallah commands men if they fear they won't be able to do the justice (its very difficult) then marry only one. Bi the way Quran is the only Religious book which limits men, no other religious book does that.
aufalina a mam can lust after many women, he can care for quite a few... But he will love only one woman... So there will always be a loser.
@Anna Łuniewska; I am a man so, don't speak for me because you are wrong. A man can love more than one and its common for us / someone tells you otherwise believe me its not true for most of us.
Anna Łuniewska ...That doesn't even make sense and is not an objective statement.
The Prophet (saw) married more than one woman, the accounts of his later wives and the accounts of Aisha (ra) shows that the Prophet (saw) did things for them that clearly showed that he loved them all. So your logic is flawed.
Secondly you can't speak on behalf of men, if Allah has allowed a man to marry more than one then clearly he is capable of loving more than one woman and treating them fairly.
You are absolutely right... Islam allow only those man who can create justice between wives and equality... If someone can't afford or cannot manage or give equal support, time, companionship and financialy... Allah don't allow those people to marry ... It's Responsibility... Not a New Scandal... Its Great responsibility...
Yes,and if having second wife is so interesting and good and solves mens problems then the first wife should also go and become a second wife to someone else.Should not be a bad idea,though i am not against Shariah but feelings bind homes,needs make houses.
Yes we can love more than one man
We fear Allah and don't react on it
Some women can't and some women can.
@Amirah M Women may not lust after men but its not necessary for her to love her husband.She may fall in love with other man who respects her and deals with her kindly.
@@asmaaziz6380 the problem are women, they choose for lust instead of love
@reem If you are able to read properly, which I doubt you can from your previous comments, I was commenting on her specific situation, offcourse the case is plural, but by your comment you have shown your real face :)
@reem nice vocabulary your mother thaught you. Just because you lack intellect to make logical arguments is not a reason to resort to primitivism
Whenever I ask men how they would feel if they shared their wife with 3 other husbands they say it's not allowed. They can never address the question how they would FEEL and we all know why that is.
It’s impossible for us to understand we can’t comprehend we are not women after all we are built differently a man can love multiple women a woman can not shes hard wired to love a single man that’s why women cheat a lot they fall in love with other men allah is the wise on he gave men this right for a reason
@@luqmanabdulahi5061 you did the same thing. You avoided the question. I’m not asking you to feel how women feel. I’m simply asking how would you feel if you had to share your wife legally with 3 other men. Just answer this simple question.
Secondly, which data have you gathered to conclude that women cheat more. Even if it was true then that contradicts your own statement that women are designed to love one man. It shows that they can love more than one man otherwise they will stay with the one they have. Thirdly, if a woman does it it’s cheating but if a man does it it’s ok because he’s designed to love more than one???
What kind of a logic is that? Why don’t you simply admit that you like it cos it gives you more variety in women and you don’t like the same rules for women because you won’t be able to handle it. Atleast be man enough to admit it instead of making up silly logic to justify yourselves.
Look sis he didn’t answer LOOOL
The truth is men don’t care about how women feel deep down. Men are selfish humans honestly. No one cares about how we feel no one. It’s come to the point where I don’t even want to get married no more.
@@sammo2713 loooool as expected. They will never admit to anything. They will never accept their selfishness and double standards. And they will never answer this question because it will prove that polygamy hurts women.
Just ask prophets wifes how they felt.... this is not a taboo subject... Being a man I cant feel how a women gives birth to a child, yes its a difficult I can understand and empathize... but thats the test in this life to obey the commands of Allah... even though second wife was not really a test in previous times... even now... its a thing which works for very small percentage of men and women... dont worry about it
I feel some imams simplify Islam so much. Where in the Quran or Ahadith does it state that men are allowed to get 4 wives merely because they are more “addicted” to their sexual desires? Our Prophet SAW never married the women he married because of his desires, they all had a purpose. Most - if not all - of his marriages were for saving the woman, who was most often a widow. Never have I heard of someone from the Sahaba that married just because of his desires. You guys ruin Islam and its reputation. Things are not that simple. “We created you in pairs” - do you forget this ayat?
Surah nisa chapter 4 verse 3
ﷺ
The most stupid comment I have seen here....
Allah ﷻ allowed Men to have upto 4 wives.
Who the heck are you to ask the reason for it, then?
Plz advice, wen he cnt provide, 1st wife, nd get d scd wife, nd his has taken my cash by lying about his work, iv help him for 30yrs , gv 5 kids, stil hd has batryed, wat to do
I feel that once another women is added in a marriage then there's no love anymore no trust everything is broken
Do you mean from the woman's side there would be no trust anymore?
At 4 minutes is there an error in defining what is abnormal?
If one wife isn't enough for a man, he won't be satisfied with two, three, or four wives. he will always have wantering eyes for more. Why would women want to live in a household like that?
Not really. Polygamy has become a taboo now but hundreds of years ago, it was common in all cultures. It is allowed in all major religions. Our own ancestors had multiple wives. You can't say they were never satisfied or had wandering eyes. A wise and just man will be satisfied irregardless of how many wives he has or even without one. Nowadays having more than 1 wife is not preferred and not easy too. Islam allowed 4 wives but recommends only 1. Peace!
@@AbdulBasith2304 not all. Check your facts.
There is poliandry even today in some countries/cultures.
Those who practice poligamy are usually in religious cults and/or fundamentalists ,on the West.
It's nota mainstream religious practice,it's considered backwards and outdated.
Marry a hindu man. You will find pure love, peace and happiness.
I have a important question about exta wife. Are there legal obligations and requirements that need to be fully and proven for financial stability meeting every obligations without taking away from the first wife's home. Possibly causing hardships and struggle? To prevent this from happening. Also and what if the other woman is having a different intention and can justify a legit reason, but could be intended to seek weatlh, fame, or a easy way out of their living situations, in order to seek support for themselves? Are there guidelines and expectations in other wives, that show My kind of experience that is similar to the first spouse? Meaning because anyone can use a man and marry them. But what if that other woman unknowingly can be the cause of privacy and security reasons to the first spouse? Is there a a background investigation and security questions and concerns? I do recognize that a lot of woman marry men to escape their living situation. Without recognizing that being a wife requires alot of responsibility.
If a man does zina its coz he has no fear for Allah don't coz off his wife he went with someone else
Not correct everyone comes from different walks of life many people fall into big sins but have fear for Allah you cannot determine someones fear of Allah from the outside. People are put into tight situations in life and they react which ever way it may be. When the man killed 99 then 100 I do not agree that he dose not fear Allah because he wanted to change. But people have to be aware of the fact that others come from different backgrounds and understand actions differently and grew up indulging in different things. It's a very limited understanding to say something like this and many Muslims fall into kufr and shirk and bida but want to judge someone for a major sin where's the logic.
No one is making you feel guilty.
If you have shut your husband out completely not even allowing him to express his god given right . Then that is wrong on your side. Get into your head
Quran : that you may Like something and it is bad for u, and u may dislike something and it is good for u. Allah knows and you know not
@@SuperServentofAllah can wives express that they too are attracted to other men, its human nature after all.....
B Tai
Having desire to do something forbidden in Islam is not a sin until person starts planning towards the sin ,if the person fights of the sin evil desire and brings it back to line with gods guidance then the person will be rewarded for it by god and god will appreciate the efforts and won’t let it go to waste and acting on the forbidden desire is a sin.
B Tai
For w wife to have more than one husband is against Islam and human nature .
what if the man still have extra desire even after second marriage?
When 1 is not enough 2nd 3rd and 4th will get borring too. Then he'll start divorcing the old ones to get new "halal" ones. Great logic!
men allready do this sweetie, it's called dating, now you pick where you want to end up
"I fear misguiding scholars for my Ummah more than the Dajjal"
-Prophet Muhammad SAW
Well said 😊😊
How is this scholar misguiding? Also what's the reference for that hadith?
@@soufianghalb8679 he's literally a sufi
I have a natural desire to have more than one husband 😉
I do too ✌🏼✌🏼✌🏼
Gosh it’s not only men
Poor men. They can't even accept reality. They think God only gave hormones to THEM.
@chavvah, so you want to maintain more than one husband Or is it that you just want to have multiple sexual partners? There is a difference.
Allah dignified polygamy for men by stipulating that all the rights of marriage are observed so that she is not just a sexual object. There is no dignity in polyandry for women, only whoredom.
LivingThoughts men also want to have multiple sexual partners thats why they marry morethan one.
Whatd the difference
@@rjvillamor3982 the standard legal way a Muslim man gets sexual access to a woman is through marriage. So the difference is that the Divine mandate requires dignifying sexual relationships by marrying and fulfilling all the rights and obligations of a marriage. Since, in Islam, men have the responsibility of maintenance of women, he must have the material means to support the women he marries. So there is a lot of red tape between a Muslim man and sexual access to women that's designed to have a sobering effect on his impulsive desires.
There is a need for Men to be real Men and take more wives if they feel they cant control their sexual desires and will fall into haram. There is no need asking first wife for permission . Ok guys?
Its better to have a second wife than having a secret girlfriend and committing zina. Of course both wives should be treated equally
I Strongly agree with you
the best is to tame his ego and be happy with one, if he can't do that he have to be just to his wife, just treating equally is not enough, he has to be just to both of them, if he can't he's not allowed a second wife and its haram for him!
@@Azimi001
"he has to be just to both of them"
that's obviously what he said, stop making an argument from nothing
@@shadowstorm5261 i wasn’t reacting to the video but this comment are you ok akhi?
@@Azimi001 yeah ik. So stop making an argument over nothing. Of course the original commenter ment that
The problem is the deceit when most scholars teach to not even tell us and this is oppression.....Allah swt says in the quran "the believing men and women conduct their affairs by mutual consultation" .....how can you be a believer and hide something like that from your own wife, It is deceit if he didnt tell her his a polygamous man before he married her,like nabi saw wives knew he would take other wives and they still accepted to marry him.... the problem is not polygamy but the deceit...Allah sw .....whoever says a women daoesnt have a choice has no empathy or mercy because no women wants go be alone half her life...nabi saw split each day and split each night so women were not alone every second day because we have needs of love and affection just like he has desires for sex everyday not every second day.Many scholars dont talk about the womens rights to love and affection,how can you be alone 50% of your life thats oppression.No one gets married to be alone.
Are u kidding me ? quran doesnt say that marry second wife bcz of your desire. No no
he could, polygamy is as old as mankind
It is mentioned in the quran surah nis chapter 4 verse 3
Quran says that because Allah has purpossley placed that desire for multiple women in man
@@mirzabaqir5159 "If you fear you might fail to give orphan women their ˹due˺ rights ˹if you were to marry them˺, then marry other women of your choice-two, three, or four. But if you are afraid you will fail to maintain justice, then ˹content yourselves with˺ one1 or those ˹bondwomen˺ in your possession.2 This way you are less likely to commit injustice." Quran 4:3
Clearly incorrect. First thing that is mentioned is orphaned women whose rights you cant give unless you marry them. If you cannot deal justly with them after marriage then only marry one. Polygamy is not to fulfill a mans desire as he can fulfill that alone with wife, he does not need another as he cannot handle another for that is a dangerous fantasy. He does not have means or mental faculties required to handle more than one relationship, it's near impossible for the average man. There is nothing here stated about a mans desire but for the women who seeks protection through marriage either for herself or children.
I think men need to educate women on their true creation so we understand man and how their created.
Thank you sister that’s the key of how Allah created us and you guys
polygomy is not bad thing but permission of first wife or told him before marrage
Don't need permission from first wife. he would tell her if she didn't cause problems.
@reem Show me where in the Quran Allah says that he needs permission from his wife.
Do not invent your own Islamic Shariah.
@reem We're not talking about the terms of a contract, but what's allowed in Islam. Now show me verses for your claim, or accept the fact that in Islam he does not need her permission nor tell her.
@reem It is NOT allowed in Islam unless it is included in the contract. If you claim it is allowed in Islam then show me a verse or a hadith that states he needs your permission or even tell you before taking another wife. It is solely his right and he can do whatever he wants. He chooses to give up this right if it is stipulated in the contract and he agrees to it.
No, it is not cheating. Cheating is him engaging in adultery. It is not cheating if he goes and takes another wife without telling you. It's his right alone with no connection to you. He can also divorce you without talking to you about it, that's his right. Stop trying to invent your own Islamic Shariah. If you think otherwise then bring your PROOF from the Quran and hadith.
The Prophet did NOT stop Ali (r.a.) from taking another wife. Fatima (r.a) was not upset because her husband was taking another wife. She was upset because he was marrying the daughter of Abu Jahl, the Prophet's worst enemy. Don't try to twist religion for your agenda.
Listen up guys, if women are going to take your rights away by stipulating in the contract that you can't take another wife then don't marry such a woman, and let her be alone forever. If you do agree to marry her then you TOO can make stipulations in the contract. You can stipulate that if she works or comes into possession of money or property then she has to give you a share. How much share? 75% since she's taking 75% of your right to additional wives (3 more wives).
Remember, women, we too can play this game.
Stop fighting huh...
Rare it is you would find a Muslim men marry more than one wife RARELLLLLLLLLLLY, and however the women numbers are far greater than men. What solution would you provide for women who don't have husband? Not marry at or poligamy or just play around to spread corruption. And who gives you right to decide for a women but she herself has the right. A woman may don't want to be part of poligamy or may be she don't mind; who are you to decide for her? Islam is not a fairy tail religion but a practical solution for this life and successful life in hereafter.
Do your research, in western countries a men/women before he settles down with one how many partner he/she already has? yet you are against poligamy because you don't care about your other sisters in humanity who will be left out without a husband and on top of it what's the divorce ratio western society? Now even the concept of marriage is depreciating from society.
And for my sisters; if you think you would live happily after a marriage, please understand this life is test (good/bad both shall come as a part of it) and soon you shall meet your creator Allah SubhanoTallah. If you follow Allah Subhano Tallah's commandments you will go to Jannah and where you will get everything you desire, a true happiness forever beyond your imagination.
May Allah guide us all. Ameen.
RehanNWL great reply sir...
RehanNWL ameen
Ameen Ya Rabbi
What if the number of male exceeds in a society should a woman starts marrying and settelling those poor men......? DONT limitate it to sexual desire as well as many studies show women also have same sexual desires than men in some case even more? if it was about desire it should be for both but Allah allows polygyny with his devine knowledge it is permissible in some cases not farz other wise if it was so necessary and men are biologically like that he would have created more wives for Adam A.S as well but the begining of mankind was from one man and only his one wife......
Will a woman die if she does not get married?🙄🙄🙄. I don't think so. It's better to live alone and submit yourself to Allah then destroying other's family.... lol
Some men are married to more than one and still look around 🙄
Allah ﷻ allowed that the Men can have upto 4 wives.
Who the heck are you to stop that?
My wife has been very clear about it..if I ever want to have a second wife she will not have problem with that it's just that she will leave me without creating any trouble for me as she will not be able to handle share me with someone else ..Well I don't want a second wife and I will never leave her coz she is my Queen and I want be with her in Jannah inshallah..she is the best thing that has happened to me..Women do understand that Allah has given them the right to have more wives but women also have the right to leave if they cannot bear..
Ladies don’t put yourself in this situation and these Alams will never help you or understand you. Just stipulate it in your marriage contract that your husband can’t take another wife. This legal in Islam but they never tell you after all man are man.
May Allah guide us.
There will always be beauty in polygamy but it's us who don't understand or see the beauty.
Polygamy gives us a halaal person to sleep with, we are all human at the end of the day.
So that on its own is good reason to work through our problems.
I know of a single woman with kids who asked a man take her as a second wife just so that she can be in a halal relationship. Unfortunately he didn't agree, but was willing to enjoy her in a haraam way. Astagfirullah May Allah protect us.
So when are married we get ungrateful and want more, but when we are single for long enough we get hopeful for even a little bit, whatever it is we should never ever be in a haraam relationship. If we single a haraam relationship should never be considered, Inshallah.
So if we consider our Imaan and the Imaan of the ummat we will see the beauty of polygamy, although it is a big responsibility and if do decide to take part we have to take on the responsibility it comes with, the responsibility of ensuring that all people under your care, wife's and kids, have their Imaan protected and are taken care of.
May Allah guide us.
In today's society a woman is not a vulnerable creature. She can earn and live well. She doesn't have to be the tail of a married man
Very good advice.We can’t close our eyes to this issue.
ቀ
oh
wat an ansr
i cn nt even undrstand that why a man would hve desire for another aftr ol he hve one
you are wrong mister
behind there is an another ansr bt nt this one
husband shuld lower his gaze as he gt to know that an unknwn women is standing in frnt of him
You're not a man that's why.
@Kat J Take your Atheist THOT views back to your Atheists. Theists follow God's rule and don't invent their own.
@Kat J stop acting like you know what is or isn't part of someone's religion.
I'm 2nd wife of my husband before I become second wife I got divorced from my 1st husbands cos hes drug addict and I'm having two daughters my 2nd husbands expect my daughters too but my husband 1st wife knows about our marriage now she's create too much trouble for us she's force my husband to divorce me she's don't have kids cos of medical problem.... I expect my husband 1st wife as a my elder sister but she's gives too much bad Duas my daughters and me now she say to my husband if he's not divorce me she's will b do suicide my husband don't talk Me now he says to me do saber..... What should I do why halal things is so impossible I want to asked women 2nd wife doesn't have heart? They don't have feelings ? They don't have rights too live as a normal wife? Is Islam gives us this teach?
Can't you earn and live by yourself? From your description it seems your second husband loves his first wife. So you shouldn't actually meddle between them. Ask him to help you get some work that you can to provide for yourself and your daughters. Teach your daughters to be independent by setting yourself as an example. No woman will tolerate her husband with other woman. If you were at her place you would have also done the same. So don't blame her and leave them alone
@@sultanajinnia9821 seek Islamic counseling or just get ready for hellfire you liberal turd.
Earning for a woman is prohibited in Islam specially if it's breaking laws of Hijab (which includes Face) when a Man is providing for her.
Taliban shall fix the hypocrites like you, Islam doesn't need such libturds
@@slaveofallah3747 I can’t believe you are a Muslim speaking like this.
Please brother answer the question why does Allah say if you can't do justice between them only take one. As I understand it we worship Allah to protect us from committing sins such as zina. It's not a women's job to worry. what sin her husband is committing. But to worry about protecting herself from sins. Please brother get back to my question
I better break up the marriage instead of sharing
I don't agree with this mufti
he is telling in a wrong way...making women angry with his such speech. ..Allah allow woman to take "hula" (divorce )...if I have to choose I better leave the man who wants 2nd wife...if Allah gave rights to men to marry more than one then at the same time Allah allow women to leave the man who we don't want to live with anymore
Sasa Khan women cannot just take a divorce at will
Oh ya u better check with it...women r human not animals
Read the Quran before u saying bullshit here around
Sasa Khan I think u should not only read but also understand the issue before bullshitting on here, Islam is not what u want, It is what is given.
A woman can sure ask for a divorce, but if it's granted or not is a different issue.
This issue is that of ijma of sahaba.
U find islamic rulings to be for animals, astagfirullah, what else can I say
We should live as Allah wants us to, not make Allah accept what we want lol
Ur claim here also means women of sahaba were animal or what?
U should work to think more like a woman and not like a man, it's a sign of the hour that men will imitate women and women will initiate men, and this is exactly what I see with ppl and this issue these days
Quraishi to think like a woman? So you think a man has different feelings? Completely different mind? You would be surprised... Maybe you should think that times have changed and in those days there aren't many widows and orphans that need the help of a wealthy man... These days Muslims marry second wife's for lust and not to help them out so maybe they are the ones who should stop bullshitting and start living by the rules and not abusing rules from other centuries...
Quraishi Where is the point in keeping a wife, who has no longer any love for you in her heart, who lost her respect for you and will never be able to trust you again? Where is the point in forcing yourself on a wife who is disgusted by you and your polygamous marriage and can't bring herself to be intimate with you? Isn't it better to give this wife her freedom? Or do you thrive on the pain and suffering you caused her?
i am a born muslim my question is
islam is a religion of peace right and the biggest sin is to hurt some one's feeling
then how this kind of religion allow men to hurt women as no women in the world can share her husband i follow islam alot before marriage but after getting marriage i just came up with the thought that whether i am in the right religion just because of this concept of second marriage
May Allah guide me to the right path
answer will be highly appreciated
Noor-ul-huda khan biggest sin is shirk, not hurting someone's feelings,
It also hurts the mans feelings if he cannot marry more.
Noor-ul-huda khan in the past men often died in battles and left their women behind without any money... So wealthy men married them to help them. Times have changed, but men still abuse the old "law" just because they can and most of them won't even care about your feelings or even about God... No matter what they claim.
Anna Łuniewska those who care about god follow his rules, change in times never changes islam or sharia
Noor-ul-huda khan ...Islam means submission of your own will for the sake of Allah. Part of being a true Muslim is to accept what Allah has ordained, whether you like it or not and without any harj in your heart.
Feelings are taken into consideration but it is not the biggest thing. It is only encouraged not a prerequisite.
Aslam u Alaikum sister... Should I tell you one story?
What if you married a man, and you have 4 child's. Time passed and they become bigger and onevday they become young.. There is only one boy and 3 girls.. The boy go abroad for better income.. And girls got married one by one... The last girl when come to marry... She loved someone... And and marry her loved one... But her lover was not loved her but Her money.. So he take her Properties and signed her for sake of her love before insulting,abused and torturing her. At the end she take HULA (divorce) from him... Now she is your most Lovely daughter but her heart was broken into peices... She went to die.... Cuz of what bad happens with her.. But she is muslimmah so she live.. Even though she don't wanna live more.. And you know that what is inside her mind.. You try to merry her again but our very own made specific society don't want to give their boys to marry the divorced girls.... (It's our society, in Pakistan)... May be there is same or different culture.... After 2 years... That girl don't even marry to anyone cuz there is no good proposal came for her.. What you will do with that daughter... Consider it if it's for your own daughter....
Well I will give you one more choice. After 2 years... One of her university friend knows about her condition... who knows about islam and Love Allah more than anyone in this world.. So he come to you and ask for permission to marry her (purposal ) that man is already Married but is practice deen and financially good and from good renowned family in your area. If it happens.. He ask you to merry her and he will wait for your answer.. What will you do?
Will you allow that innocent daughter (divorced lady, unfortunately) to marry that man? Or will you take her into your home for her all life? Dreaming that there will be one Prince come for her and marry her.. And one day all things will be fine?
Put yourself into that situation... Than understand that why Allah allowed This Wisdom based decision...
For as many wives as "he has" I want just as many husbands... Like the person underneath me said you shouldn't have a problem with that right?? I I think all women around the world should have as many husbands as their husband has wives.
Amber Terrell In Christian : Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines .Abraham, Jacob, David, Solomon, and others all had multiple wives. In hindu : lord krishna had 10,000+ wife's. ! So which religion is better!? K let me know where r u from?
YAS Gurll yasss agreed we shud have moreee
I’m tired on these men only getting the perks
Not so logic sister 😊
@@MrDsheikh very logical. If the first husband spreads his butter thin between all the kids with all the wifes he has,as many do...they marry for pleasure not thinking about finances at all, then those wives need another husband to provide for them as well
I'm a reverted muslim .. 27years old... I wanted yo marry a single man . I was not brave enough to accept polygyny.. but i Got to know that some people only appreciate you when they knoe you have accepted islam but the don't accept you as a family because of their fear. Or whatever.. same happened with me .. i was searching for a muslim man . First they showed their interest but after that they rejected just bcz I'm reverted . Just when i started to think about polygyny . Now im learning more about polygyny
Don't get demotivated sister. Islam is a blessing on you. When a true Muslim finds you, he won't reject or even (usually) be into 2nd marrige.
Dont. Do it. Its a criminal acct with your self. Because you will see the man. 2 times a week. And believe me that. Felling its the worst. In the live. In my experience. He was married before. And. He divorce and. I became. 1 wife. Guess what yes. He. Was getting married. Over. And over. Why i think. Because. The quit. And i just found out. And now he got married. Againg. Subahanallah. Don’t dooooo it. If you want peace and. Don’t hurt other woman felings
@@islamcuentametuhistoria6675 agreed don’t
@@islamcuentametuhistoria6675 women like YOU are worthless, no wonder he left YOU.
I don't know about others but being a women i said to my husband whenever u think i m not enough for u n ur family do another marriage bcoz we did love marriage n his parents dosn't accept me. I always said to him do second marriage girl of your parents choice but my husband denied n said this is big responsibility ek ki puri krlu woi bahot hai. In my opinion husband should be afraid of second marriage not wives. Bcoz it is seriously a big responsibility to love equally two or three wives fulfil their wishes equally n if u r not able to do u will be in hell in the world n hereafter.
Loving equally isn't an obligation.
Prophet pbuh loved Aisha most among all his wives.
Fulfilling basic needs equally is an obligation
well you take a second husband ..a younger one see how he feels then..you are his equal don't let a man decide your future for you....respect...
@@covidcol3505
You get pregnant and reproduce then see how she feels about your feminine nature
Men =/= women
Gender roles are decided by creator not creation
@@covidcol3505 I can tell your not a Muslim so don’t speak about that which you have no knowledge on.
@@robthebob4586 hit a nerve have i. women are a mans equal you want to keep them subjugated and at home and pregnant. men can have more fun but muslim women can't
if you are women then how to keep the man marry only one wife? if you are men how to keep your self marry only one wife?
and why many women rejected polygamy???
Why would you want to deal with a bunch of women? Each woman has a separate personality, separate needs, separate wants ... why would you want that much responsibility?
@@EvaAnika because fornicating is forbidden maybe
@@EliteKozarcan poligamy is legal fornication
@@EliteKozarcan he already has a wife. If wife has to bear being in a polygamous marriage, why can't the husband just confine to one?
I like Islam a lot but I think I will never understand this. I think women have desires too, not only men. I think it would be very painful to share a husband, is so horrible to think that maybe one's ilusions is to be everyday of your life with your husband or going to the market or your children school plays next to your husband taking his hand in public and you can't cause Monday to Wednesday is the second wife's days ??? What happen when in intimacy you are thinking what he is doing to other woman? And sleeping and dinning alone with the kids, is a happy life ?? And we must understand that Allah permits this. I just don't get it. I don't like it. Men, Muslim or not will die of jealousy, anger and disappointment if their women are touched by someone else, why they don't have empathy? Wouldn't it be fair if the first wife doesn't feel good divorce her husband ? Will he help her financially (I guess not). I just have so many questions for this topic, I wish I could be a Muslim but being a Muslim means I should understand and accept this. It's just so complicated, I have so many doubts about it. What happens if the man loves more one woman than another, 'cause no one can get through perfection, wouldn't be unfair ? The husband will rather be with the other, and he will be kinder.....
This Mufti is not telling a Muslim woman must allow her husband to marry a second wife, but only to allow the freedom of expression & beliefs of her husband on this issue. If the pair love each other so much and have a good married relationship then there would not be this discussion in the first place. The scholar also tells men they are stupid to keep fantasising to marry another wife and the couples to reconcile their differences. Fantasising other male or females is not Islamic as Allah said in the Quran not to even come near adultery and in the hadith literature even the gaze is restricted as in the Quran where both men and women are told to '..lower the gaze' see Quran 24:30-31.
Islam encourages men to care for their wife and only marry one as it would be difficult to do justice to more, however Islam allows up to 4 wives only when there are valid reasons pertaining to 'orphaned' women with no one caring or protecting them and only if they can do justice to them which the Quran states clearly they will not be able to and so therefore, to only marry one.
Thanks for your smart answer brother.
sister, i would like to clarify little bit of ur doubt.....imagine a scenario where u have a younger sister who unfortunately can't manage a man for marry (may b it is due to her Uglyness or Handicap & so on..) , His waiting for marriage extent so long that She reached in her old age , may b it is 40 or 40+ .... How will u feel about your own sister who was not chosen as life partner by any man.....would u let her in this way for the rest of her life or you will let her to marry to someone who take her as 2nd wife (& u will quite sure that the person takes ur sister's hand is a pious, religious & responsible man )....SIMILARLY, We Muslims Consider all muslim sisters as OUR OWN SISTER ...so, we don't want to make any of our sister Looser ..... it is a sign of Magnanimousness of a pious sister who gives Priority to her fellow sister over herself EVEN IF it is a matter of SHARING Husband....More over it is the reality that there is so many millions of FEMALE overnumber than Male....u can't bypass the Reality.....
Marcela Nieto In Christian : Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines .Abraham, Jacob, David, Solomon, and others all had multiple wives. In hindu : lord krishna had 10,000+ wife's. ! Number of females r more so wat should other women do?
Marcela Nieto if you are Muslim then seek Allah’s Aid in accepting this. If you are not, then don’t worry about it, for issues nonexistent compared to not worshipping Allah or worshiping others beside Him. That is more pressing. Besides once you accept Allah, the you the Legislator of this issue being discussed Cares more about you then you do yourself. My Lord Merciful and Loving. And He wants good for you. Learn Who Allah is. Uh... from Muslims. They know who they worship five times a day in prayer more than anyone else.
May Allah Guide you.
It's the same men that would be angry when their son has a way stronger relationship with the mother than himself and only looks up and cares about his mum...
For some reason a guy watching porn occasionally seems like less of an issue than marrying a whole other woman.
Astagfirullah
Yes i believe that conversation can happen in normal way but not to threaten wife....Allah created only one hawa despite the men nature....what if wife finds other man attractive and wants to marry him it will hurt husbands feeling...what if man after having 4 wives still wants to have another because of his natural desire!!! A good happy family always has two partners that is one husband and one wife
Lol horrible way to explain this.
Yes we have to talk. But Even Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam did not allowed to Ali radiyallahu to have second wife. He said if you will have second wife then first divorse Fatimah. If someone sadden Fatima, he sadden me. After that Ali radiyallahu anhu stopped to have second wife. end of discussion !!. Prophet Muhammad did not give lecture to his daughter Fatimah “look Fatimah this is allowed in Quran, Ali has the right to have second wife..I have also many wives..etc” No! Even Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam id not allowed Ali to have second wife, because her daughter did not wanted and sadden. Can we now say that Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam said something against Quran!? Of course No!! This shows how prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam respect the feelings of women, this shows that even the father of women are allowed and can step in to let divorce in such those kind of cases. And also yes Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala allowed to have up to 4 wifes BUT IF THE MAN WILL BE JUSTICE EACH TOWARDS HIS WIFES. AND ALLAH SUBHANEHU WA TA’ALA ALSO MENTIONED THAT ONE IS BETTER IF MAN WILL NOT BE JUSTICE! It is also mentioned clearly in Quran Surah Nisah 4/129 that “ NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU WANT TO, YOU CAN NOT AFFORD TO TREAT WOMEN FAIRLY”. Why no one is talking these Ayats!? Can a man give guaranty to treat in justice with both wives!? Emotionally, economically etc..I dint think so! We live in a such bad era that everyone knows clearly that most of man even almost every man can not be justice. If someone can not be justice then it makes something halal to haram. So please before given ONE SIDE (men perspective only) psychological explanation, think both sides psychology like in ayah 4/129 and Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam did. also please share the ayah to men Nisa 4/3 and 4/129 first and the experience that Ali, Fatimah and Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam had before, and also men have to know the responsibilities, the rights of women, if he will treat unjustly then in akhirah there are big big big consequences..why no one mention this!?! MaN hs to know these consequences So that men can see the truth, not see one side of selfishly “I am man it is my right”. Even with those kind of ( one side men perspective) explanations shows the injustice towards women. So please be Justice like mentioned in Quran Al Kareem. Also this is not a right for men this is just a permission by given Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala. Allah subhanehu wa ta’ala knows best.
Exactly
ﷺ
What rubbish. GET OUT OF YOUR JAHALAT. The prophet *NEVER* gave Ali any ultimatum because he had no right to. *and fatima was NOT upset about him re marrying, thats WHY he sent a proposal in the first place*. He sent a proposal to a woman from the enemy tribe to the Prophet, and that goes against his Glory. Thats what angered fatima, she was angry for her fathers respect, not for Ali. Then Ali showed remorse for doing something so stupid. And after fatima died he had foir wives and hundreds of bondswomen
They leaving firs wife kids how is that right they leaving with second wife
Where is the gratefulness to Allah when a couple are both satisfied, mentally, physically and spiritually but still the man is not contented. How can a wife be righteous, obey her husband and be guided to the Akhirah when her mentor do not follow every Islamic rule? (Ex. Being physically close to his female friends) and believe in polygamy.
JazakAllah Khair.
It hurts especially when he is not being honest!
she walks in, I walk out. No discussion not bullshit.
ESSAN 29 do you have kids? When i get married i want to help a sister inshallah i pray it is a good sister so its one of those rare situations. Just telling u if u ever walk out.. Inshallah youll stay in a happy marriage ameen. I dislike it too but wud only like one good sister cuz i have a fear of having kids
what? i will never stay with him. are kidding me? if gets married its a proof that he does not love me. some men even encourage the first wife to be friend with his others wifves. hell no
ESSAN 29 sorry just saw your comment. A lot of women say no then don't mind to be a second wife
The purpose of marriage in islam is not men's physical pleasure
As said in Quran
(......so that ye seek them with your wealth in honest wedlock, not debauchery.)(Quran4:23)
Not for debauchery
Allah gave male the right to marry 4. Allah is Ahkamul Hakimin. The Giver of Law. So no question. We believe in Allah and His Deen.
"natural desires" is not a sufficient excuse. If 1 wife is not enough then there's no guarantee that 4 wives will be enough. people used to have more than 4 wives in the old "natural desires" times
Made me cry so much . Heart broken at the thought !
Don’t believe this. They don’t care about sunnah they only do it for desires.
Narcissist men do polygamy marriages for lust/sexual desires
These men are covert narcissist
Hopefully we’ll get better husbands in Jannah.
@S K it’s kinda not funny actually. Men who marry multiple wives do so often only because they can and an opportunity comes their way. Not because there is something wrong with their first wife.
I agree with almost everything he says here. The problem is that women feel the same.
The problem is the allowance men receive for feeling attraction to other women while women feeling attraction and desire to other men is seen as forbidden, evil, insane, etc.
Human beings are human beings and maybe it is less in women. I'll agree with that.
But women also want more men and enjoy the idea of more men. The belief that women are sex objects for their husbands instead of active sexual, emotional beings just like men are, is sexist and cruel.
When a woman cheats on her husband it is the highest horror for Muslims. But they think polygamy is simply god accepting the sexual desires of men. Why doesn't Allah accept the sexual and emotional needs of both genders? People are people, not sexes. Some women want to be submissive and some women want to be dominant. Squeezing them into these roles regardless of personality creates a big problem.
Islam came halfway, but it stayed too far inside its anti-woman semitic shell. Come out, Islam. Come out.
Kitura Aslam u Alaikum Sister,
Let's see you will get what you want...
You have 2 husband's... Okay
Now let's see we make rule that one day is for 1st Husband, and 2nd day for 2nd Husband... Okay...
After some months you will got Pragnent....
Will you tell me plz that Baby is from whose husband of yours?
Who is the Baby's father?
The baby's father will be present in the child. And because they love me they will not care whose child it is and they will love it and love me any way.
Kitura don't you think that if a Baby knows who is his/her Real mother... Do the Baby have not the Right if he/she wants to know, that Who is His/her Real Father?... When that baby go to school, so if they management board enters the name of that Baby, whose name that Baby select? Or he will say that He Have 2 fathers.... And Can't compare from which father he came from cuz His Mother do intercourse with both of them same time.. Day by day... ? Just for discussion... Is that baby not feel bad about him/her?
At least the offsprings know that whose their Real Mom and Dad...
Don't they have that Right?
In polygamy, at least the Babies know that who are their Real Father and Mother...
Aslam u Alaikum sister... Should I tell you one story?
What if you married a man, and you have 4 child's. Time passed and they become bigger and onevday they become young.. There is only one boy and 3 girls.. The boy go abroad for better income.. And girls got married one by one... The last girl when come to marry... She loved someone... And and marry her loved one... But her lover was not loved her but Her money.. So he take her Properties and signed her for sake of her love before insulting,abused and torturing her. At the end she take HULA (divorce) from him... Now she is your most Lovely daughter but her heart was broken into peices... She went to die.... Cuz of what bad happens with her.. But she is muslimmah so she live.. Even though she don't wanna live more.. And you know that what is inside her mind.. You try to merry her again but our very own made specific society don't want to give their boys to marry the divorced girls.... (It's our society, in Pakistan)... May be there is same or different culture.... After 2 years... That girl don't even marry to anyone cuz there is no good proposal came for her.. What you will do with that daughter... Consider it if it's for your own daughter....
Well I will give you one more choice. After 2 years... One of her university friend knows about her condition... who knows about islam and Love Allah more than anyone in this world.. So he come to you and ask for permission to marry her (purposal ) that man is already Married but is practice deen and financially good and from good renowned family in your area. If it happens.. He ask you to merry her and he will wait for your answer.. What will you do?
Will you allow that innocent daughter (divorced lady, unfortunately) to marry that man? Or will you take her into your home for her all life? Dreaming that there will be one Prince come for her and marry her.. And one day all things will be fine?
Put yourself into that situation... Than understand that why Allah allowed This Wisdom based decision...
Plz answer this too? I will be appreciate your answers...
I'm American and I am not Muslim.
You have a problem with this because to you it is weird, but to me it is normal and to my children it will be normal.
No problem.
You talk about how difficult the notion of polygamy is for women to even talk about ... but if it is actually true that God supports polygamy, WHY wouldn't it be natural for BOTH PARTIES??
Yes women can love more than one. We have desired too. We fear Allah and don't act upon them. Some women don't want more than 1. Some women do secretly
You are not our creator to know what is in our hearts and Allah has given stringent conditions for polygamy.Knoe the religion before quoting it.
We can love more than one. Happen all the time. Women talk in groups amongst themselves. If you're not a women then please you know nothing
@@speakonit25 i know,i meant it for others who think only men are justified to look for love.....
@@speakonit25 your free to fornicate but don't expect any rights
U are correct .
...as long as women can have second husbands. Would a man be okay with that? He shouldn't have a problem then.
Carib Spice men don't have periods where they can't have sex with their partner. so if women stop having periods, become capable of becomibg pregnant with multiple kids from miltiple men at tge same time and stop having mood swings we can settle on the deal. tell me when you've accomplished that!
women stop having periods as early as 30, men have mood swings too you just had one, and you guys can't get pregnant at all, so what gives...
How inconclusive of a reply and how shallow to pass a personal remark on youtube. If periods stop at 30, which they don't*(unless somethings wrong with the internal system), you still have not told me how women can accommodate to carry multiple children from multiple men at the same time. This video is solely for people who accept Allah as their creator and accept themselves to be His slaves. If you're not a muslim yet then your purpose of coming here has to be to become one soon. If the purpose is to merely contradict then join the line of the billions who hate this mighty religion.
mohammed Taqiullah Shareef-
early menopause doesn't necessarily mean there is anything'wrong' with a woman, at all, early menopause can be genetic and yes they may well stop even in the twenties, being uneducated on the matter doesn't change the facts,
why would a women need to carry several children at once?
the ability of carrying several children from alternate partners is not something marriages generally require as a prerequisite,
there are plenty of people who marry knowing they cannot bear children/or have children in the case of men, at all, so whats your point.
who said i'm contradicting anybodies religion, i'm merely contradicting you and your apparent stupidity,
Carib Spice ...it would be hell for a woman to have more than one husband. It's practically impossible
Allah has made a way for everyone. Some women can exist as co-wives, most cannot. Some men dont want added responsibilities. Some want many wives, some dont even want one. Also, men weaponize this to use against their wives. Why not make your intentions clear? That i will marry more. That way there is no deception. The woman can decide if she will accept that or not.
This is the worst kinda explanation ever. Am sorry but it's like ur giving a clean chit to a man, just so that he desires he can torment a women. It's like my husband's desire is way more important than my sanity.
If you were not raised by a hindu mother and a zun mureed father, LITTLE THINGS would not make you insane. Thank God my daughters are not as worthless as you.
thanks a lot
nice video ajd explanation
she was staying my house 1 year.she use to bring my house to her family .like her mother her sister her brother. I didn't know them .she use to bring them to show me .when I don't even know them.I ask my husband divorce
becouse I wil never trust him again .so is haram to ask divorce .
Nadia Hassan sister it's not haram to ask for divorce.. If we have major reasons... I feel sad and sorry for your situation, Islam allows Husbands to Create justice between both... And he might not creating it. He must be fair with both of you and must be honest.. May you and hour Husband love each others more and start making good solutions to the problems...
Nadia Hassan sister ask him da reason y he had 2nd wife? In Christian : Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines .Abraham, Jacob, David, Solomon, and others all had multiple wives. In hindu : lord krishna had 10,000+ wife's. ! So which religion is better!? In our religion it is allowed only if he hv 4 requirements!
Divorce him
I lived in Lahore.
Most married women always knew that their husband used to go to Heera Mandi for song and dance and more.
This Haram and Halal discussion is out of place, when it is a part of life.
The wifes knew it, and talked about it. Nothing she can do.
can someone answer my simple innocent question that if a man leave his home go abroad work hard day and night and finally after 10 or 15 years of hardwork get a strong position in that country and able to buy his own house car and property then one day a stranger who is very poor and need all these more then him came to him and he had to handover all these things to him or to share all his things with his poor muslim brother then what a man will do share it with stranger who have not gone through all these hardships or will happily give half of everything or full of it to that poor man who need it more?????
come on guys what are you talking about stop using islam to fulfill your lust please stop using woman on the name of islam
stop this nonsense specially this message is for islamic scholars who try to prove at any cost that prostitution is allowed in islam on the name of nikkah
please stop this nonsense and girls and women stop being accused and used by such nonsense men like this man
trust Allah take divorce and Allah will give you Nd your kids Rizaq inshaAllah
its generosity to share his property and Allah will reward him
Noor-ul-huda khan In Christian : Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines .Abraham, Jacob, David, Solomon, and others all had multiple wives. In hindu : lord krishna had 10,000+ wife's. ! So which religion is better!? K let me know where r u from?
If nobody share property with stranger he can become a thief. Then he will be a threat to an everybody property. To avoid this Islam has solution which is logical.
As-Salaam-Wa'laikum brother what I want to know if a sister who is young herself and she has two kids and her husband wants to take a second which she's not happy abut but she know in Islaam man can marry 4 times. Now the thing is can she live near her family for help and she knows that she will be jealous and she don't want to course fitnah in the house. she don't want to live in the same town. Does she has that right to do that live where she wants to live
Same my way of thinking😧
Yep she does .. she can live where she wants to. You have to provide equal protection for both you can not force her to live same house or same town
After became second wife where I lossed my whole future in Muslim sir .I am from hindu background who said many reasons and such valuable words to accept and made me loving after 2.5 yrs who said simply if want live or go .now daily crying life bro
Maheswari Rebecca please don’t let one foolish brother ruin Islam for you leave him
May Allah give you happiness u deserve sister
Stand firm n hold onto ur deen (Islam)
Still today ,I did not live my married life with him at night as second wife because he s saying that first wife threatening by his children..then y Muslim people are marrying second person by showing some health issues to first wife and telling more reason that unsatisfied....
After now I am begging every day to him ..pls when u come home and also financial issues also came ..Actually I gave all my jewels and divorce money also to him ..after asking him to return who he made me feel begging every day with vegs fruits and rents also more .....
Actually many Muslims are using their 4wives allowed an Islam and they are slowly making women to love them by saying their troubles after first wife came and after they are ready to live with first wife only because society knows and they are getting another kind of profits by second wife and simply leaving them like widow ..
Even ramzan month fully I were opening my nonbu days by requesting him lot then he braked the fast just 2 days ...I am from hindu background....
2days only I had nonbu kanji by requesting him lot and had it...then also he scared with his time while they called ..
One day if I have the kind of relationship then he will spend 1hr or just 10mins in hour home maximum.
He s scaring for his first wife and daughter and finally as divorced women myside this also like widow .
I am just biotech discontinuation women .so unable to go job ..having girl child 6 yrs which brought by first husband...
Anyway I hate Muslim law and Muslim religion because only by these kind of people
As well as I like all Islam women who follows their dress code and masjith prayer activities very strictly
I am waiting for zakirnaik reply
@@maheswarirebecca7834 than you should have picked the right man
Not acceptable... I mean a person if loving his 1st wife how can even think to have other one. Obviously one wife he takes will be his official wife and other will be in secret. How is it possible for another women to face it every day in just name of Islam n nikah while will she die every day? Yes she deserves the one who keeps her with complete dignity and respect.
its allowed for the women to forbid polygamy in the nikah soo if you dont care about your nikah... dont cry later.
btw.. this is a bad video.
Nero Ve nope. wrong...if you have a read about this matter in detail When looking at the etiquette's and the permissable and impermissable conditions during nikkah...Not allowing a man a right that ALLAH himself has given him is considered to be an impermissable condition regardless of whether it is on the nikkah contract or not.
just saying
qash maz Just saying..its allowed there is a fatawa given from the Fatawa comitee of saudi arabia.
you can read it.its in a summery of islamic jurisprudence 2 chaper 6 by sh. Salih al Fawzan. its also confirmed be sh omar suleyman and dr zakir Naik and a lot more. so its legitim!. Do you think you have more knowlege than these shuyukh..i dont think so. this topic is matter of ikhtilaf.
you dont need to follow this but dont say its wrong becouse some of our great shuyukh allowed it and proofed it with the sahih hadith about the prophet where he forbit ali ra. to marry another women beside his daughter.
by the way you can also forbid the sexual contact to slaves in the nikah.
If you had read about this issue in drtail you would have known this.
salam.
and in the hadeeth narrated from the Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) it says: “The Muslims are bound by their conditions, except a condition that forbids what is permissible or permits what is forbidden.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (1352). And he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Whoever stipulates a condition that is not in the Book of Allaah it is not valid, even if he stipulates a hundred times.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (2155) and Muslim (1504).
Indeed yes
@@QashMaz i think the scholars mentioned would know about these ahadeeth when forming the fatwah bro
what is halal means? to merry second wife when you are not even enough for the first wife , I know man that was impotent he did not want to go doctor so he married second one to cover up .
libin alale the first wife is not obligated to stay with him if he's impotent. she should desire children and she can end the marriage and get someone potent
Mohammed Taqiullah Shareef
Many men marry 2 when they themselves are on WELFARE. ..they marry two expecting Western governments to support one or both families...this is wrong on SO MANY LEVELS....I'm not for all the recent austerity measures in the UK but I AM happy that this will seriously restrict these ldiotic men..Islam CLEARLY stated you can marry more if you are FINANCIALLY ABLE.... not if your government is!
libin alale
Also so many men here in the West marry again when they themselves are on WELFARE. ..what a joke...they give Muslims a bad name. ...they make out to authorities second isn't married ...so when she has kids they are illegitimate in the eyes of the law. ..imagine a n iqaabi sister going to welfare and saying I'm not married but pregnant....don't imagine its happened again and again and again.....it's sickening
May Allah gave us strength and help us to bring 2nd wife , and may allah help us to deal with bad situations ,. May Allah give me beautiful wife with good akhlaq , allah knows the best what is good for Us |
Ameen
Does'nt your first wife have good ekhlaaq??? Is she not beautiful???
ALLĀH.capitalize the letters
Assalamu alaikum!! Polygamy is not everyone neither men nor women .
Perfect answer! I am going to enjoy more about this subject with my husband
Allah gave the brothers this right yes he did it's in the Quran but also brother it says in the Quran of you can't do justice only marry one. And also in the Quran it says you will never be able to do justice even if you try to do so.
And then Allah says to be just as much as you can within reason and not to completely incline towards one and leave the other. Don’t leave things out to fit your own narrative.
@@robthebob4586 to the ones already married to more then one wife at that time why then would you put a woman through that by marry another woman when you have been warned you can't be just.
And it says if they come to an agreement as he can't be just. so that is a clear waring brother's can't be just. it's not fair to enter a marriage knowing you can't be just
@@aishanaja2074 Because after that Allah says do not completely incline to one over then other and try your best to be just. Hence why it’s explicitly stated in the Quran that men may marry 2, 3, or 4.
@@aishanaja2074 Not completely just bit Allah says to try to be as much as you can and not completely incline to one over the other.
Quran 4:129
And it will not be within your power to treat your wives with equal fairness, however much you may desire it; and so, do not allow yourselves to incline towards one to the exclusion of the other, leaving her in a state, as it were, of having and not having a husband. But if you put things to rights and are conscious of Him - behold, God is indeed much-forgiving, a dispenser of grace
I think a lot of people misunderstood the shaykh. Please dont jump to conclusion... research more on why does Islam allows poligamy?
In fact Islam is the only religion in the face of the earth which has the statement of marry ONLY one.
In the Quran God says marry women of your choice in twos, threes, fours but if you cannot do justice then marry only ONE. Quran (4.3)
It is not a must. It is optional. It is there to solve your problem out. Your probplem of surplus of women since so many of you men becoming gay etc... so Islam offers you solution.
As muslims, we summit our will to the will and plan of Allah (God).
Allah knows best.
This is big Haram , woman needs to live with the pain and suffer because of the man. And do not forget that we are living different time. Not time of prophet Muhammad. With that you are making woman to feel bad about herself . I’m leaving here in Arabs world and they are all suffering , being another woman . We are leaving different , women can talk , work being educated . Not a black dots who will just do what husband want. Women fight for your rights and do not let man wash your bran . You can always do better
ﷺ
It is not "normal" and not ALL men want a 2nd 3td or 4th wife. It is sick and disgusting to normalize it so much.
You're not Muslim right?
@@cissejr7695 she's a sick and disgusting liberal far from islam and only muslim by name
Slave if you are a Muslim and allowed to be so disrespectful Shame on Islam
All your life you have watched your worthless father under the feet of your bitch hindu mother
This is not normal. What about the woman feelings and desires? No one wants share thier spouse. A real man will be able to control his lustful desires
Allah knows what's best for us we don't, if practiced correctly if a man is God fearing as a woman I think polygyny is a great solution to today's society whereby the number of women is far more jen men and today's there is so much fitnah so its hard very hard for our muslim brothers to protect themselves. We women must realize that yes its hard to accept but we have to submit to Allah that means submitting to His laws whether we like it or not . Inshallah the hardship is rewarded by Allah directly these women who are patient and submissive to their Creator.
Where are you finding the numbers for men and women?
Not finding it right