"Take baby steps" Yes I agree but when I started I just decided to go to school fully decora-ized and pretend I wasn't dying from shame. The next day I was cured. LIKE I JUST CHOOSE THE AGRESSIVIEST METHOD POSSIBLE BUT HEY IT WORKED. Anyways I do not recommend to start like me, it was just an irrational decision, but I'm just an inpulsive bitch
@@cybrgrl My friend(been friend for 9 years) hates my style(I dress in decora kei now) and has become more distant and I don't know what to do, I'm scared she will stop talking to me😭
@@dsnyder3601 it's probably going to be hard to accept, especially since you two had been friends for such a long time, but like the og commentor said; if they don't accept and love you the way you are, and even pureposely become more distant with you because of a fashion style, then they may not actually care enough about you to be called a friend... it's super sad I know, I myself and maaaaany other folks in the alt comunity had to go through that. If you really have doubts, try and reach out to them and open about your doubts and feelings, communicate is key in any kind of relationship and you'd be more at ease having clarity on the situation even if it is a truth that hurt(although it might not be 100% the case, that's why asking is super important!) And if things really turn out badly, don't be scared you will not have friends anymore, just interact in the comunity, forums or even discords if there are any; you can also do that simply to meet new peoples! The comunity is super cool and there are an incredible amount of peoples not only open to accept the style but who are also dressing as such that you can befriend!! Heck even a good amount of the artistic and weeb comunity are super accepting of it if you are part of it/like these things uvu So don't worry I'm sure everything is gonna be fine for you in the end! Hope it all goes well and you have a good day💖💖💖
Me and my friend roast eachother by joking , but it started going to far. everytime I make something or decorate something , she tells me "it's ugly" I try going along and telling her "You're ugly" but then she responds even ruder and it just makes my self confidence go down , but she has been my friend since Kindergarten and I'm scared when I let go I'll miss her. :(
When you see someone wearing something unique and a style you wont see everyday, go up to them and compliment them! When i was insecure about wearing just platforms, someone told me they loved my shoes and eversince then, i have felt better with them
"there's nothing wrong with being weird. weird is awesome" as a member of the weirdcore community that's one of the nicest things I've ever heard about us.
I’m a guy but I wanna start dressing more femininely so I’m glad this was here. I still like masculine clothing but I don’t want my wardrobe to be one and not the other. Thing is, women have a lot more options when it comes to fashion and that’s what really started to get to me. I just wanna be able to express my feminine side via fashion because oh my god stuff can be so cute. The only other problem I have is that I just wish I looked more feminine overall like physically but that can’t really happen easily can it?
@@veronicaorsmth update for you guys: Sooo turns out I’m bigender! And I’ve been able to start dressing a lot more towards how I like and I’m really proud of myself!
Parents are THE reason I didn't dress how I wan't my mom just straight up laughing at me when I didn't dress baggy and ghetto like the other Latino boys in my school or my dad always being like "im so glad your not gay" when i'm bi and love fashion. I love you so much and im crying right now I hope you see this LOVE YOU Edit: People like you and my friends give me the confidence to do it anyways!
I'm in the same situation, with traditional asian parents. They say "you must've been brainwashed to like these things, nobody sane would like them naturally". I also need to hide that I'm bi. I pretend to be an entire second person with them, which is shitty to do with your own parents I know, but I'd rather have 2 lives than none. Good luck Jammy.
so i had these friends who would tell me how to dress. i used to wear really basic clothes: skinny jeans, sweaters, basic white t shirts.. i would get made fun of but i remember one day wearing super colorful clothes, tons of accessories aka decora fashion, and my "friends" started making me feel guilty. i fought back for myself because they kept saying "how do you evem have the CONFIDENCE to wear that? it looks terrible" or "did an 8 year old force you to wear this?". it was hard thinking of comebacks but i easily said "atleast i have style" or "i want to stand out" and stuff like that. i kept coming to school in outfits like those and it got normalized. i do get called "crazy" but i dont care because my outfit makes me happy, i wear what pleases me, not other people
as a male who likes j-fashion and relativity girly things i find it hard to not think that others are judging you based on what you wear. I'm a confident person but sometimes that feeling slips in. But no matter what im always ready to be myself!
i wore rainbow makeup and all black clothes with skirt and cat ears shopping a couple of days ago and a pretty girl asked if i was a decora and that really gave me confidence 🥺
i started secretly dressing in goth fashion when i was 8 years old and hid it until i was 10 because my sister made fun of people who dressed that way, now im 14 and everyday i live my best life wearing whatever i want and not caring what others think, be yourself!! >3
@@s.sumbrella7616 I might be trapped in high school for now because of one of the a hole that insults me and calls me names when he doesn’t like the things I want to wear and that includes things like knee boots doesn’t matter the color and the style of the boots. When I try to explain or ask him a question he continues doing this and ignoring my question during my last period class. He does the same thing when I was looking at the British hunters from Downton Abbey after I am done with my classwork. Good thing I ended up moving far away from him in class as well as ignoring him. I did tell on the teacher but he doesn’t stop so for me ignoring him and make 0 eye contact works very well.
The most stressful thing for me is people taking pictures of you without permission. This has happened to me so many times since I started school again and it's so uncomfortable as confident as I am in my style. But I don't wanna go out looking boring :/
I relate to this video so much!! I’ve been wearing J-fashion for over 3 years by now, and I’ve never felt happier and more confident. I suffer from social anxiety and ‘regular’ anxiety, and strangely enough my fashion style helps me be confident in myself. At the same time, I tend to have bad anxiety days where I struggle to go out in more ‘out there’ outfits, so I wear my ‘comfort’ looks that I feel 100% comfortable in (outfits and pieces that I LOVE and have worn very often). I get a big range of reactions to my fashion when I go out, and like you I’m just so sick and tired of people not being decent human beings! A lot of people around me tell me how they wish they had the confidence to wear what they want, and I always encourage them but it makes me sad to know that there are a lot of people who suppress their true style for others :(. I’ve been able to help other people gain the confidence to wear what they want just through showing up in my style everyday, and it’s the best feeling!❤️
@Mitsurugi Jin Ikr people have so much hate in their hearts it’s sad. Sometimes I think people actually want to have the confidence to be themselves but they don’t so they take it out on others who actually do because misery loves company. Sickening.
One thing I learned that helps is, "a person can't give you what they don't have". Some people don't have love so they can't give love. Just one example. Some people don't have logic so they can't give you logical behavior. A second example.🥰 Love your style. I'm Goth myself but I really loved others in similar subcultures. 😊
I appreciate this video even though I feel pretty confident with having an alternative style, but it can be hard especially for guys. Often I find that people will be more willing to accept when a woman or girl wears bright and colourful clothes, but when a guy does it (or at least, for myself) people will actively shy away or treat them badly. There's a huge difference in how people treat me vs my female friends who have similar styles --- but I try not to let it bother me too much. On anxious days it can get to me though!
I know how you feel. It's rough, especially when it comes from other men. But hey, at least we're not wearing the same 3 button up shirts ever day. Their lack of style isn't our problem.
I love dudes that rock a unique style instead of just some button up and a pair of dark jeans. I hope people wisen up to the fact that men should be able to dress how they want without it being stigmatized❗
For me, I was always looked down on because I was ''different'' than the rest in my class, even relatives would give me the stare and tell me that I'm older and should wear something that fitted my age (I was just a teen discovering myself at that time). Again I wasn't wearing anything extreme, it was a skirt with stripes and a long fluffy hoodie, some big shoes and I had my hair in two pigtails. It wasn't super pastel or dark, just natural and I felt so discouraged, embarrassed after they said that and I started crying that day. Keep in mind that it was also my first time ever doing something like that (going out of my comfort zone) because I saw someone do that online. Only to get these hateful comments and even in front of everyone like a whole gathering. I then locked myself up, always in my room with personal issues and stuff and felt like I looked stupid etc. Then I fell into a dark hole and was super insecure about literally everything about me. Of course because I stood out, people started commenting on my looks and stuff and it just made me more anti social. It's a long story but I hope I didn't go anywhere personal lol EDIT: I'm in a better place now, and I literally don't give a f if people judged my looks. I read my comment again for the first time in a long time and wow, I really was in a bad place, also this was a year ago?? I was a people pleaser and once I decided that I wanted to be me I felt discouraged because I wan't used to it. My family is very supportive of me and always been that way. I just never really saw it until I realized, I was the one thinking negatively. Changing your mindset is key.
:( I’m sorry you had to go through that. I did something similar when I was 14 and i was mocked for it and it really sucked so I would put my hair into two buns (African hair) right as I left the house and flaunt it at school. Right as I came home I put it back in a single bun and eventually my classmates got used to me being that way and would compliment me occasionally. If I was went out I would add an accessory I loved right after I left the home and would wear it outside. 🍃 Now I’m nineteen and slowly buying items of clothing that i love and replacing the old ones with them. I wear a bright green froggy headband outside and you bet im buying more. 🌧 I’m sorry about such relatives, people like that suck and you don’t deserve such a ratty treatment. 🌧 It may be hard to hide things for a while around family, but my advice is to try things bit by bit outside and indoors until you’ve built up the confidence to be who you are and wear what style you like. ☀️ ☀️ 🌸 Wear your things. Let them talk, soon they’ll get used to it. And if they don’t, you don’t have to wear it around them, wear it somewhere else. But don’t let some people with their own lives use insults and harsh words to hinder you from living yours.
Don't listen to disgusting people like that and when our family makes us feel embarrassed it's just that they care about other people who aren't even apart of their life and it's just wasting their own, don't let your life go to waste just because of them! yesterday I turned 15 my sister always discourages me about wearing any j fashion because she's just too caught up with what people might think and that is just wasting your life tbh I felt embarrassed when I'm with her and I'm always trying to please her but i stop trying now cuz if she's that embarrassed than might as well not be with her and im very grateful for a mother that understands me and let's me wear whatever.
Pppprrreeeeaaacccchhhhh!!!!!! This is SUCH an important message... and I love that you teared up a little! You're passionate, you care!! I've been preaching this message too and more need to hear it. Thanks for this grrllll!
Thankyou so much for this video! I was having a similar conversation with my mother about changing my wardrobe and where to get plus sized clothing to suit my interests. She supports me and has said the exact things you have said here, it's nice to see that what she has said is a general idea across many people. I'm starting to feel more confident to wear what I want to wear and this video is helping me even more. Thankyou so much!! 💕💕
Decora makes me so happy, but my mom hates it. She doesn't want to be seen anywhere NEAR me when I'm wearing it because it apparently makes her feel ashamed. Last time I wore it she said all this bs that tore my confidence down, like how she's embarrassed for me, herself, and my father, including "You're not gonna stop wearing it anyway because you don't listen to a fucking word I say" damn right, I'm not gonna stop wearing it. It's one of like three things that makes me happy. 👌
Honestly Just remember that if someone judges you and they’re looking, they prolly think you’re really cool. also Remember that people are scared of different and stuff that they don’t understand. My mom always just told me that I wanted to dress that way because it’s a sexual thing or that I’m just doing it for attention…
This advice works for any style. Wear what makes you happy. Other people only see a snapshot of who you are. No one ever really knows you. Surround yourself with people that support you. Be you and Be Happy.
My only obstical is my family I'm slowly getting to the "goth" fashion I want to dress as And I'm coping with what I have As well as my sewing skills I'm getting there
I went through such an identity crisis about a year ago. I kept trying styles that I thought would make people like me better. I even spent $400 buying a used Louis Vuitton. It was expensive and exhausting. One day I was criticized for the way I dressed by a family member and I realized that I will be judged no matter what I do. I was also using fashion to hide and protect myself from judgement. That week I put my LV up for consignment and I bought a pair of goth platforms that I was in love with but hadn’t had the confidence to wear. The shoes arrived and it made me so happy! I wore them and got so many compliments for wearing something different and at the same time I was very comfortable in what I was wearing. I felt so cute! Now I wear whatever the hell I want. I’ve gained so much confidence in all areas of my life and I don’t want to hide anymore. If anyone reads this, please be yourself. Staying in the box is not fair to yourself. Love to everyone ✌️❤️
From my experience I easily made it in because I got bullied regardless of what I did and didn't do. In my mind since nothing I did mattered to anyone and everyone loved to make me feel miserable I stopped giving a crap and began to dress how I felt most comfortable. I remember being stared at like I was a criminal for wearing an orange beanie in middle school, having had little to no support I got used to standing out.
マンバrrican I’m so sorry that you had to go through that and I hope things are better for you now 💖 But you’re so right, no matter what you do, there will always be bullies and jerks and people who don’t understand so it’s so freeing to just wear what you want and become your most authentic self 💖
I'm glad I'm not worried about that because I've been making kandi and already have kidcore and alt shirts and stuff I'll be wearing to school. The people that will probably make fun of me will be wearing something like NIKES anyways
About the topic of other people not thinking about you, I find that is so true! I'm especially most guilty of staring at people in public accidentally, or I look at people with unique styles in awe, and often times try and go out of my way to compliment them as a sign of encouragement (like when I served a lolita girl in work I just couldn't keep my mouth closed haha)!
i’m alt and i got my platform demonias today and i was super nervous to wear them out even though they’re my dream shoes. This really helped, thank you! 💖
I’m a furry and a therian and I like to wear real tails, when I wore my first one to school I wasn’t even acting weird I was just wearing it and everyone was barking at me and meowing at me besides my friends. And the first time I dyed my hair and went to school everyone thought it was cool. So that’s definitely a mood change.
I really needed this because I’m going out with my friends tomorrow and I want to wear a decora outfit. I don’t care what my friends think, they usually support me but to get where we’re meeting I have to walk through quite a shady place where I’ve had trouble off people for the way I dress before. This confidence boost really helps
ive saved this video to my “style shit” playlist. man, im constantly down on myself about the styles im into or have been into. i just wanna let things occur gradually, and honestly its fun just getting hair clips and keychains and atm looking for shoes and ways to customize shoes. i think being on insta makes things worse cuz im like hahah these ppl are so much better than i am :/ logically ik its just a snapshot in a day of someones life thats been edited for aesthetics but irrationality is powerful lmao im subscribing. im not rlly a decora person, more on the kawaii/fairy kei end w some streetwear/tech wear mixed in, but i appreciate the advice and i think ur videos are useful for learning abt jfashion in general. so thanks
theres also this issue i have where i feel like im not alt enough? i dont rlly consider myself alt, i never got into scene, probably the furthest i went w music was melanie martinez... idk ?? its brutal i learned abt alt when i got into kpop a few years ago and hahah i think the media def poisoned my mind, i avoided pastels for long aside from pink (cuz its my fav color) but then id fight with the jewel toned purples and yellows i would wear that the media would say are meant to look good . im kinda getting emotional watching this hhh the reassurance is rlly nice
My mom ruins all of it. I like a emo/tomboy style but she always says stuff like “God gave me a girl not a boy plus it makes you look fat and ridiculous”
If my parent just made fun of me or didnt like how i dresses but didnt literally force me to change and throw things away that i like this would be a lot easier, im not allowed to were makeup because "i look like a clown/it makes me look too much older" and honestly its bullshit.
i actually enjoy the weird looks i get, it means i caused some sort of impact on that persons day XD also PLEEEASE more decora on a budget vids! your tips were soo helpful ❤️💛💝💙💙💜💚
Y'all my mother is a conservative Christian, and she knows I'm a lesbian. I'd say I'm more femme lesbian, but I would also like to wear some pride stuff. She won't let me wear anything that acknowledges I'm gay, and she won't let me dress the way I want, and makes fun of what I want to wear. I really want her to understand that it makes me feel shitty about myself whoever she makes me wear a tan sweater and blue jeans to school. Idek it use doesn't feel like me
Thank you for this? I came across this video on accident and so far its helping me. I've been wanting to dress differently but anxiety, self confidence, dysphoria and a lack of clothing that makes me truly happy... are major road blocks. I want to dress a bit more colorful but with the rise in conflict I'm scared of being a easy target for violence since I'm in something "unique." Bright clothing is basically a bulls eye for anyone with a long range weapon Sad how I have to worry about that but this is our world now. Edit: not sure if decora fashion is my thing, it looks fun but might be a bit too colorful for me, could try a more toned down version, i love colors but intense colors can give me overload. I love pastels but i also do love some neons too... maybe its time to invent my own unique style. I have a sewing machine so maybe i can create my own pieces with older clothing... now i regret getting rid of my bright blue pants, they were too tight but those would have made interesting shirt sleeves
It's okay to feel uncomfy! but I really believe that taking baby steps as said in the video will really help you. I had an emo/scene style back in middle school and I loved wearing it so much that I never cared what anyone thought of me really, It honestly helped me make genuine friends who loved my style and accepted me as the person I am. SO just be you! and it's okay to take baby steps in order to achieve your dream aesthetic :)
im not even allowed to dye my hair bc my stepdad sees someonne expressing themself and just goes off about how insecure they are and how they dont want people to see who they really are but its the opposite :/
This is such a sweet video and really helpful for people in any subcultures or fashion and even just in general I'm a punk and I've kinda just started living to see people's reactions. Its made me realise I'm a bigger person than the people staring or making rude comments but also could be inspiring and helping a lot of others out there
I can't shop online so I'm not able to wear exactly what I want, but my fashion sense is not quite the same as a normal person. It's funny because before quarantine I would only wear a black hoodie, a t-shirt and leggings. Now I'm happy to wear a skirt out.
I'm not even in Japanese fashion, but you video was sooooo helpful!!! I'm always afraid of wear mi style (kind of glamorous cottagecore) but always ends wearing hoodies and jeans. Thank you sososoosoooo much you are amazing!!!!
Thx for the amazing advice! I’m young and I’m getting into Kawaii fashion and I had a toxic friend who basically would laugh at me for everything She laughed at my style me liking gacha/anime content and she even laughed and made fun of a baby picture of me… they really lowered my self confidence a lot but I’m working on cutting off bad and toxic people out of my life and embracing my inner and outer beauty and style! ❤️
My personal style lately is late 90s, early and mid 2000s, 2000s punk girl (more like inspo from Bratz Rock Angelz and Bratz Pretty N Punk dolls) and cute and cool anime girl fashion (think Misa Amane and Nana for example). Where I’m from almost everyone is a little more conservative and basic. I’m literally sick to death of suppressing my true style and aesthetics because I’m terrified of getting judged and getting nasty stares. But you know what I’ve decided fuck it life is too short to not be your true self and to care what some sad and miserable people think of you. It’s THEIR loss, not yours, because you’re the one having a good time and not them. They’re the ones missing out because they don’t have the confidence to be themselves so they take it out on others who actually do. They’re just miserable and sometimes I even pity them because they must have really sad and boring lives. I have social anxiety so you can imagine that I HATE when all the attention is on me but I’m gonna try to rock my style and act like a mfn queen and embrace the glares and be like “yeah I’m fuckin cool and fabulous, must suck to not have style like me” 💅🏻👑✨
I wear regular clothes, but the thing that always makes me not give a sh*t about what people think is the fact that they actually don’t think anything they just want to be rude bc they see you (in their perspective!) as a potential victim and try to bring you down because their parents and/or other peopl made them have a low self-esteem so they want to make someone feel bad about themselves so that they will feel good about themselves. It will still feel weird being the center of (any kind of) attention because that’s normal but you get used to it.
Anyone else see someone dressing in the style that you have in your wardrobe but you’re too scared to wear, then get upset and sad cuz they have the confidence to wear it and they look amazing…?
I started to get more confident in wearing decora (and just confident in general) some months ago. it first took me a lot of time to find my style and you helped with that ! When I found your TH-cam channel I already knew I love decora fashion. Right know I'm wearing kandi and colorful necklaces, and I stardet wearing a bit makeup! I'm still learning more about decora fashion and gaining more confidence. Thank you for this video.
I’ve been obsessed with various gothic/alt styles since I was little and Monster High first came out. Now I’m older and recently bought my first article of nu goth clothing and I have my nana’s gothic boots from the 80s so I’m excited.
Thank you so much for this video :) It was really helpful. I am a baby goth but I have social anxiety and the unwanted attention I get when I am dressed in my goth clothes in public makes me really uncomfortable sometimes and triggers my anxiety, especially when I am at school. I am really working on trying to feel more comfortable dressing how I like and not caring so much about other people’s opinions :) Btw I love your style, it’s so cool 💖
Well I am mostly afraid of men bc they can be really agressive I would like to wear more kinky? Alt fashion like Nana from anime Nana or mini skirts but ugh i dont want old men catcalling me especially when i go late or alone Thank you so much for video)
Personally I just want to have enough confidence to wear red lipstick, pink, florals, ruffles, bows, feminine and girly clothes. I am always afraid of people mistaking me for Barbie and underestimating my intelligence, especially because I am a natural blonde.
my style is more gutter punk-ish but i ADORE decora! I'd love to dye my hair neon green and wear cute hair clips and everything colorful. I'm definitely going to work on getting cute accessories and outfits. you've inspired me! Much love! 💛
I feel like this video came at the perfect time. I had smthn on that felt a little too dressy, that I felt nervous wearing bcs I rarely ever dress up and it felt like smthn ppl would judge me for. :/
This is really good advice. I have been asked this question a lot over my life since I have dressed in alt styles for over ten years. I wear something very similar to decora now its like if you mixed the dopamine dressing trend with decora that's essentially my style nowadays. I only wear extremely bright colours and loud big makeup and fun colours in my hair. I was a very insecure child and definitely dressed for other people for a while. Then I think I was 13 or so when I just decided I didn't care anymore. It does take time to get to a point where you won't mind the stares, because there will be people that stare at you. How I take it now when I get stared at is that they just love my outfit, most people actually really like bright styles as they see them cheery and happy. My partner and I are both alt and we both are very used to the staring. Tbh after a while it becomes fun going out all dressed up.
I'm slowly buying clothes for my style, oddly I feel way better in the most dramatic clothing (not that dramatic, just not the most normal, like platform shoes, and stuff like that)
Thank you so much for uploading this!!! This made me feel more confident and comfortable with myself in what I want to wear!! (I’m inspired by mall goth 90s fashion and Fruits magazine!!) again thank you so much for uploading this :>
Aaa tysm for making this! I'm starting to wear kawaii fashion, but I've been a little nervous since I wear more modest clothing, I also have trouble finding knee length pleated skirts.
I’m so happy you made a video on this topic for those getting into dressing more true to themselves!! Starting out can be really scary! :( I never thought I’d have the courage to dress the way I do now, and even just recently when I went out, people were giving me dirty looks, pointing, giggling, etc. Where in the past I would’ve panicked and wanted to hide, now I just mostly feel bad for those people for being so close-minded and feeling like they have to pick on someone for no good reason. As obvious as it sounds, you need to remind yourself that if people react negatively towards you simply for dressing the way that makes you happy, you are NOT the problem. Have a nice day/night everyone!! 💕
My style is kinda a mix of different styles, mostly babyish/childish style, pastel doll, and lots of pink and unicorns :) I feel the cutest and prettiest when i wear what i love, and my family (except my dad because he's religious) and my friends are very supportive, but i get a lot of stares and comments from strangers. Some of them are good but some are not so nice.. but it doesn't bother me at all because i know this is my life, my body, what makes me love myself more and be happier. I know im cute and beautiful and they can stay mad and keep wearing their boring clothes 😂 Just be confident with what you decide to wear and realize that nobody own your life and body except from YOU ❤️
Scene kid here! I'm slowly building the confidence to dress more scene, but it's hard to do that when simply wearing black shorts with striped tights underneath result in weird looks. Luckily, there's an alt girl in my programming class that likes my style and her compliments really make me feel better about myself. My mom also loves my style and is always looking for clothes she thinks I might like ^_^
thank you so much for this video ! i'm interested in gothic lolita style, trying to build up courage for myself since i don't have the support of my family. i can just say taking small steps helps alot. thank you.
Commenting from a few years down the road to say that this has been one of my comfort videos for quite a while now. Also that you dress the way I wished I could when I was like 8, and you inspired me to get a neon plaid skirt that I found at a thrift store :D
I watch your videos when I need to remember the good people in fashion. I'm a designer too and the fashion world is rough. You have created such a lovely corner of the internet, thank you 💫
I SO needed to hear all this stuff. Thank you so much for making this. I may need to re-evaluate my closet and try more style experiments. So far I am really loving Uchuu Kei but my interests vary so much that I will likely combine several styles together to be more me. Again, this is such an amazing video, thank you.
I’m a Jirai-Kei girl and I live in an East Asian country, so there are quite many girls who wear jirai fashion as well so I’m mostly confident in my own country. The thing is I’m going to study and move to Canada and I’m scared that people around there will not be familiar with this fashion and will look at me weirdly.
I used to always be scared to go outside in super color full outfits (not decora or kidcore just colorful) but now I just like to wear whatever I want not to impress anyone just to be myself!
You are wise beyond your years. This video is going to do a lot of good for a ton of people. Plus, it is always a good reminder for everyone...including myself. Thank you very much for the excellent content.
as someone in the process of transitioning, these are great steps too. I got used to wesring my binder at home first before wearing it to the corner shop. After a few days of these smaller steps, I wore it to work.
CubsGirl there is a girl in my class who where’s Decor faction like everyday and This video makes me feel so much better about what I wear and Honestly I just want to say I am also secretly a decor fashion lover even though I almost only wear black. But I also just want to say I know this video not only, effects me but also effects other people on how they dress.
I don't wear jfashion atm, but I do want to become more confident in dressing as I like. I don't think women should have to shave, which is unusual by "fashionable" standards. I have felt this way since high school, and I have slowly allowed more people to see me with hairy legs. I will still shave for the summer and for special occasions though. I built my confidence up over years too, but by bit.
I have a colorful style and it’s not super out of the ordinary, but the compliments I get make me feel so confident about myself!! so I’ve been trying to compliment other people more but it’s hard because I’m kinda awkward lol
I was really afraid to talk with my mom about lolita fashion. I show her a picture of a lolita on pinterest and I talked to her about lolita fashion and she said "oh, I alr know what lolita fashion is, when you show me some clothes I did research and I knew you like that type of style, there is nothing wrong with you wearing it, except for the price"
The way I see it, (I live for drama so-) Either nothing happens and you go about your day looking fabulous, or you get a funny story. In other words, you can have a TH-cam story time if anybody says anything.
TYSM FOR THIS VIDEO!! i wear minimal decora / kawaii / lolita style clothes and i was kinda afraid at first but after watching this i decided to start wearing it in public and i surprisingly got a lot of compliments!!
I think I’m going to wear my modern Victorian inspired dress to school tomorrow... I’m so scared I’m always super insecure but I love the dress because it’s comfortable and it’s not form fitting but it’s vintage and I’m so scared people will think I’m weird So wish me laughing clothes I guess 😟🍀
My parents won't allow me to dress alt/Gothic/punk and I've been told by them when I wear something I like they tell me that I should change because it doesn't look right. I even feel like I can't really wear or do stuff when I want to I barely wear a skirt or dress around them because I lack confidence. I really hope when I finally get to move out I'll finally be able to gain the confidence and wear what I like to wear! Also I love your hair clips they are so cute!
its my siblings that make me feel so unconfident saying i cant wear a bucket hat cause "it doesnt look good on me" So i have bought my own and i dont Listen to em anymore
i id'd as a trans guy for awhile but i've really been wanting to wear skirts and bright colourful clothes recently, my parents are supportive of me being trans 100% (buti id as nonbinary now which i haven't mentioned >_>)!! but i've already established like oooh i hate dresses and 'girly' stuff etc but man i really just wanna wear bright rainbow and skirts now lol T~T sorry for rambling ahah, but thank you for making this video!!!!
nice hilbert pfp >:3 also this reminds me of how i currently identify as a nb transfem, but i still like androgynous, leaning masculine clothing and ill probably relearn to like masculine clothing like suits and such once im more confident with myself
This is so wholesome and uplifting! Thank you for such good content. I wish more people thought like this and understood that people can wear whatever the hell they want and can't dictate how other should live their lives. More self-expression and less judgment!
"Take baby steps"
Yes I agree but when I started I just decided to go to school fully decora-ized and pretend I wasn't dying from shame. The next day I was cured. LIKE I JUST CHOOSE THE AGRESSIVIEST METHOD POSSIBLE BUT HEY IT WORKED.
Anyways I do not recommend to start like me, it was just an irrational decision, but I'm just an inpulsive bitch
Same 😳😂
JSBDSM I FEEL YOU THO, IN 6TH GRADE I PULLED TO SCHOOL IN MILITARY LOLITA AHAHAH
@@yamihere5569 YO, YOU'RE MY IDOL NOW I WANNA DO THAT SO BAD!
u sound like an aries
Dang I wish I could just do that
If your “friends” make fun of the way you dress, they ain’t your friends. Don’t worry I’ll be your friend.💖
So true!!!
I want a friend >.
@@cybrgrl My friend(been friend for 9 years) hates my style(I dress in decora kei now) and has become more distant and I don't know what to do, I'm scared she will stop talking to me😭
@@dsnyder3601 it's probably going to be hard to accept, especially since you two had been friends for such a long time, but like the og commentor said; if they don't accept and love you the way you are, and even pureposely become more distant with you because of a fashion style, then they may not actually care enough about you to be called a friend... it's super sad I know, I myself and maaaaany other folks in the alt comunity had to go through that.
If you really have doubts, try and reach out to them and open about your doubts and feelings, communicate is key in any kind of relationship and you'd be more at ease having clarity on the situation even if it is a truth that hurt(although it might not be 100% the case, that's why asking is super important!)
And if things really turn out badly, don't be scared you will not have friends anymore, just interact in the comunity, forums or even discords if there are any; you can also do that simply to meet new peoples! The comunity is super cool and there are an incredible amount of peoples not only open to accept the style but who are also dressing as such that you can befriend!! Heck even a good amount of the artistic and weeb comunity are super accepting of it if you are part of it/like these things uvu
So don't worry I'm sure everything is gonna be fine for you in the end! Hope it all goes well and you have a good day💖💖💖
Me and my friend roast eachother by joking , but it started going to far. everytime I make something or decorate something , she tells me "it's ugly" I try going along and telling her "You're ugly" but then she responds even ruder and it just makes my self confidence go down , but she has been my friend since Kindergarten and I'm scared when I let go I'll miss her. :(
When you see someone wearing something unique and a style you wont see everyday, go up to them and compliment them! When i was insecure about wearing just platforms, someone told me they loved my shoes and eversince then, i have felt better with them
"there's nothing wrong with being weird. weird is awesome" as a member of the weirdcore community that's one of the nicest things I've ever heard about us.
Weirdly, wearing gothic clothes boosts my confidence!
Yes! I live in central Alabama, but I'm happiest in my platform boots and bondage pants.
Wearing clothes that you love boosts your confidence, and that's why it's *sooooooo* great wearing what you love!
I’m a guy but I wanna start dressing more femininely so I’m glad this was here. I still like masculine clothing but I don’t want my wardrobe to be one and not the other.
Thing is, women have a lot more options when it comes to fashion and that’s what really started to get to me. I just wanna be able to express my feminine side via fashion because oh my god stuff can be so cute.
The only other problem I have is that I just wish I looked more feminine overall like physically but that can’t really happen easily can it?
I love to see people who consider both “masculine/feminine” styles :D Fashion shouldn’t even be categorised that way!
makeup is my best tip!! winged eyeliner can go a long way :)
GO FOR IT!!!!!!!!
@@veronicaorsmth update for you guys:
Sooo turns out I’m bigender! And I’ve been able to start dressing a lot more towards how I like and I’m really proud of myself!
@@kyubeyz_7062 :D
Just what i need to start uni looking like a clown, a confident clown
let's start uni being the cutest most confident clowns >:3
🤡
I’ll join you, but I’ll look like sentient wallpaper
@@emstert8665 OMG SAMEE
i'll join you, but i'll be a cybr.grl's wallpaper clown instead
Parents are THE reason I didn't dress how I wan't
my mom just straight up laughing at me when I didn't dress baggy and ghetto like the other Latino boys in my school or my dad always being like "im so glad your not gay" when i'm bi and love fashion. I love you so much and im crying right now I hope you see this LOVE YOU
Edit: People like you and my friends give me the confidence to do it anyways!
Parents worry too much about the wrong things for the sake of having "face", you matter more than their expectations ♥️
💕💕💕💕 I’m sorry you dealt with that ;0;
I'm in the same situation, with traditional asian parents. They say "you must've been brainwashed to like these things, nobody sane would like them naturally". I also need to hide that I'm bi. I pretend to be an entire second person with them, which is shitty to do with your own parents I know, but I'd rather have 2 lives than none. Good luck Jammy.
i’ll adopt u 🥺
Same, I wanna where darker clothes and wanna have black nails but my mom hates Goths
so i had these friends who would tell me how to dress. i used to wear really basic clothes: skinny jeans, sweaters, basic white t shirts.. i would get made fun of but i remember one day wearing super colorful clothes, tons of accessories aka decora fashion, and my "friends" started making me feel guilty. i fought back for myself because they kept saying "how do you evem have the CONFIDENCE to wear that? it looks terrible" or "did an 8 year old force you to wear this?". it was hard thinking of comebacks but i easily said "atleast i have style" or "i want to stand out" and stuff like that. i kept coming to school in outfits like those and it got normalized. i do get called "crazy" but i dont care because my outfit makes me happy, i wear what pleases me, not other people
They were projecting their own insecurities onto you. When they said "how do you have the confidence to wear that" that said everything
as a male who likes j-fashion and relativity girly things i find it hard to not think that others are judging you based on what you wear. I'm a confident person but sometimes that feeling slips in. But no matter what im always ready to be myself!
🌸💝🌸💝🌸💝 keep being you.
i wore rainbow makeup and all black clothes with skirt and cat ears shopping a couple of days ago and a pretty girl asked if i was a decora and that really gave me confidence 🥺
i started secretly dressing in goth fashion when i was 8 years old and hid it until i was 10 because my sister made fun of people who dressed that way, now im 14 and everyday i live my best life wearing whatever i want and not caring what others think, be yourself!! >3
My mom always says whenever i want to wear a cute flower hat or a funky necklace "you need to grow up!" , so this video really helped!
Ignore her, choose happiness because there's a big difference looking "mature/adult" and actually being mature
@@s.sumbrella7616 I might be trapped in high school for now because of one of the a hole that insults me and calls me names when he doesn’t like the things I want to wear and that includes things like knee boots doesn’t matter the color and the style of the boots. When I try to explain or ask him a question he continues doing this and ignoring my question during my last period class. He does the same thing when I was looking at the British hunters from Downton Abbey after I am done with my classwork. Good thing I ended up moving far away from him in class as well as ignoring him. I did tell on the teacher but he doesn’t stop so for me ignoring him and make 0 eye contact works very well.
I relate too much
@s.sumbrella7616 what if I'm not mature myself?
honestly my problem isnt needing the confidence to dress like how i want in front of other people, its telling my parents how i want to dress.
The most stressful thing for me is people taking pictures of you without permission. This has happened to me so many times since I started school again and it's so uncomfortable as confident as I am in my style. But I don't wanna go out looking boring :/
There are only 1 or 2 people like that in my school a lot of the people just mind their own business or compliment others
Hi! Just a question where do you get the clips in your hair? There adorable!
Thank you so much! They’re all from various sources so I either make them myself or buy them on Etsy shops or AliExpress 💖
I relate to this video so much!! I’ve been wearing J-fashion for over 3 years by now, and I’ve never felt happier and more confident. I suffer from social anxiety and ‘regular’ anxiety, and strangely enough my fashion style helps me be confident in myself. At the same time, I tend to have bad anxiety days where I struggle to go out in more ‘out there’ outfits, so I wear my ‘comfort’ looks that I feel 100% comfortable in (outfits and pieces that I LOVE and have worn very often). I get a big range of reactions to my fashion when I go out, and like you I’m just so sick and tired of people not being decent human beings! A lot of people around me tell me how they wish they had the confidence to wear what they want, and I always encourage them but it makes me sad to know that there are a lot of people who suppress their true style for others :(. I’ve been able to help other people gain the confidence to wear what they want just through showing up in my style everyday, and it’s the best feeling!❤️
@Mitsurugi Jin Ikr people have so much hate in their hearts it’s sad. Sometimes I think people actually want to have the confidence to be themselves but they don’t so they take it out on others who actually do because misery loves company. Sickening.
i relate to this so much. its crazy how when i wear really vibrant and attention-drawing stuff it actually HELPS my anxiety
Thank you so much!! I actually feel a lot better now about wearing what I want!! Time to go be Kyoshi and step on some people
One thing I learned that helps is, "a person can't give you what they don't have". Some people don't have love so they can't give love. Just one example. Some people don't have logic so they can't give you logical behavior. A second example.🥰 Love your style. I'm Goth myself but I really loved others in similar subcultures. 😊
I appreciate this video even though I feel pretty confident with having an alternative style, but it can be hard especially for guys. Often I find that people will be more willing to accept when a woman or girl wears bright and colourful clothes, but when a guy does it (or at least, for myself) people will actively shy away or treat them badly. There's a huge difference in how people treat me vs my female friends who have similar styles --- but I try not to let it bother me too much. On anxious days it can get to me though!
This is why there aren't many guys wearing Gyaru these days, people are mean.
I know how you feel. It's rough, especially when it comes from other men. But hey, at least we're not wearing the same 3 button up shirts ever day. Their lack of style isn't our problem.
I love dudes that rock a unique style instead of just some button up and a pair of dark jeans. I hope people wisen up to the fact that men should be able to dress how they want without it being stigmatized❗
For me, I was always looked down on because I was ''different'' than the rest in my class, even relatives would give me the stare and tell me that I'm older and should wear something that fitted my age (I was just a teen discovering myself at that time). Again I wasn't wearing anything extreme, it was a skirt with stripes and a long fluffy hoodie, some big shoes and I had my hair in two pigtails. It wasn't super pastel or dark, just natural and I felt so discouraged, embarrassed after they said that and I started crying that day. Keep in mind that it was also my first time ever doing something like that (going out of my comfort zone) because I saw someone do that online. Only to get these hateful comments and even in front of everyone like a whole gathering. I then locked myself up, always in my room with personal issues and stuff and felt like I looked stupid etc. Then I fell into a dark hole and was super insecure about literally everything about me. Of course because I stood out, people started commenting on my looks and stuff and it just made me more anti social. It's a long story but I hope I didn't go anywhere personal lol
EDIT: I'm in a better place now, and I literally don't give a f if people judged my looks. I read my comment again for the first time in a long time and wow, I really was in a bad place, also this was a year ago?? I was a people pleaser and once I decided that I wanted to be me I felt discouraged because I wan't used to it. My family is very supportive of me and always been that way. I just never really saw it until I realized, I was the one thinking negatively. Changing your mindset is key.
:( I’m sorry you had to go through that. I did something similar when I was 14 and i was mocked for it and it really sucked so I would put my hair into two buns (African hair) right as I left the house and flaunt it at school. Right as I came home I put it back in a single bun and eventually my classmates got used to me being that way and would compliment me occasionally. If I was went out I would add an accessory I loved right after I left the home and would wear it outside.
🍃 Now I’m nineteen and slowly buying items of clothing that i love and replacing the old ones with them. I wear a bright green froggy headband outside and you bet im buying more.
🌧 I’m sorry about such relatives, people like that suck and you don’t deserve such a ratty treatment.
🌧 It may be hard to hide things for a while around family, but my advice is to try things bit by bit outside and indoors until you’ve built up the confidence to be who you are and wear what style you like. ☀️
☀️ 🌸 Wear your things. Let them talk, soon they’ll get used to it.
And if they don’t, you don’t have to wear it around them, wear it somewhere else.
But don’t let some people with their own lives use insults and harsh words to hinder you from living yours.
Don't listen to disgusting people like that and when our family makes us feel embarrassed it's just that they care about other people who aren't even apart of their life and it's just wasting their own, don't let your life go to waste just because of them! yesterday I turned 15 my sister always discourages me about wearing any j fashion because she's just too caught up with what people might think and that is just wasting your life tbh I felt embarrassed when I'm with her and I'm always trying to please her but i stop trying now cuz if she's that embarrassed than might as well not be with her and im very grateful for a mother that understands me and let's me wear whatever.
Pppprrreeeeaaacccchhhhh!!!!!! This is SUCH an important message... and I love that you teared up a little! You're passionate, you care!! I've been preaching this message too and more need to hear it. Thanks for this grrllll!
Aww your diy’s are so cute :)
Thankyou so much for this video! I was having a similar conversation with my mother about changing my wardrobe and where to get plus sized clothing to suit my interests. She supports me and has said the exact things you have said here, it's nice to see that what she has said is a general idea across many people. I'm starting to feel more confident to wear what I want to wear and this video is helping me even more. Thankyou so much!! 💕💕
Classy Undercut // Electra that’s awesome, that makes me so so happy to hear that she’s so supportive of you! Mama definitely knows best!! 💖💖💖
Decora makes me so happy, but my mom hates it. She doesn't want to be seen anywhere NEAR me when I'm wearing it because it apparently makes her feel ashamed. Last time I wore it she said all this bs that tore my confidence down, like how she's embarrassed for me, herself, and my father, including "You're not gonna stop wearing it anyway because you don't listen to a fucking word I say" damn right, I'm not gonna stop wearing it. It's one of like three things that makes me happy. 👌
Honestly Just remember that if someone judges you and they’re looking, they prolly think you’re really cool. also Remember that people are scared of different and stuff that they don’t understand. My mom always just told me that I wanted to dress that way because it’s a sexual thing or that I’m just doing it for attention…
This advice works for any style. Wear what makes you happy. Other people only see a snapshot of who you are. No one ever really knows you. Surround yourself with people that support you. Be you and Be Happy.
My only obstical is my family
I'm slowly getting to the "goth" fashion I want to dress as
And I'm coping with what I have
As well as my sewing skills
I'm getting there
I went through such an identity crisis about a year ago. I kept trying styles that I thought would make people like me better. I even spent $400 buying a used Louis Vuitton. It was expensive and exhausting. One day I was criticized for the way I dressed by a family member and I realized that I will be judged no matter what I do. I was also using fashion to hide and protect myself from judgement. That week I put my LV up for consignment and I bought a pair of goth platforms that I was in love with but hadn’t had the confidence to wear. The shoes arrived and it made me so happy! I wore them and got so many compliments for wearing something different and at the same time I was very comfortable in what I was wearing. I felt so cute! Now I wear whatever the hell I want. I’ve gained so much confidence in all areas of my life and I don’t want to hide anymore. If anyone reads this, please be yourself. Staying in the box is not fair to yourself. Love to everyone ✌️❤️
From my experience I easily made it in because I got bullied regardless of what I did and didn't do.
In my mind since nothing I did mattered to anyone and everyone loved to make me feel miserable I stopped giving a crap and began to dress how I felt most comfortable. I remember being stared at like I was a criminal for wearing an orange beanie in middle school, having had little to no support I got used to standing out.
マンバrrican I’m so sorry that you had to go through that and I hope things are better for you now 💖 But you’re so right, no matter what you do, there will always be bullies and jerks and people who don’t understand so it’s so freeing to just wear what you want and become your most authentic self 💖
I'm glad I'm not worried about that because I've been making kandi and already have kidcore and alt shirts and stuff I'll be wearing to school. The people that will probably make fun of me will be wearing something like NIKES anyways
Same I’m learning to wear my kandi In public cause I’m very proud of my kandi
@@amelialewis4383 i'm already doing that!! and you should too
PL4SHT33TH do you have tik tol
@@amelialewis4383 Ohh, no nabfbhg
ikr they make fun of us but like they can’t really say anything because their style doesn’t stray far from jcpenny 😭
About the topic of other people not thinking about you, I find that is so true! I'm especially most guilty of staring at people in public accidentally, or I look at people with unique styles in awe, and often times try and go out of my way to compliment them as a sign of encouragement (like when I served a lolita girl in work I just couldn't keep my mouth closed haha)!
i’m alt and i got my platform demonias today and i was super nervous to wear them out even though they’re my dream shoes. This really helped, thank you! 💖
I know you commented this 6 months ago but I wanted to ask which Demonias do you have.
i need that froggie hood in my life, it is incredible 🐸🍄💖
🐸!
I’m a furry and a therian and I like to wear real tails, when I wore my first one to school I wasn’t even acting weird I was just wearing it and everyone was barking at me and meowing at me besides my friends. And the first time I dyed my hair and went to school everyone thought it was cool. So that’s definitely a mood change.
i want n a m e s .
@@oldchannel_ignoremyoldcomments cant say their names but their initials are ks ms and b
I really needed this because I’m going out with my friends tomorrow and I want to wear a decora outfit. I don’t care what my friends think, they usually support me but to get where we’re meeting I have to walk through quite a shady place where I’ve had trouble off people for the way I dress before. This confidence boost really helps
ive saved this video to my “style shit” playlist. man, im constantly down on myself about the styles im into or have been into. i just wanna let things occur gradually, and honestly its fun just getting hair clips and keychains and atm looking for shoes and ways to customize shoes. i think being on insta makes things worse cuz im like hahah these ppl are so much better than i am :/ logically ik its just a snapshot in a day of someones life thats been edited for aesthetics but irrationality is powerful lmao
im subscribing. im not rlly a decora person, more on the kawaii/fairy kei end w some streetwear/tech wear mixed in, but i appreciate the advice and i think ur videos are useful for learning abt jfashion in general. so thanks
theres also this issue i have where i feel like im not alt enough? i dont rlly consider myself alt, i never got into scene, probably the furthest i went w music was melanie martinez... idk ?? its brutal
i learned abt alt when i got into kpop a few years ago and hahah
i think the media def poisoned my mind, i avoided pastels for long aside from pink (cuz its my fav color) but then id fight with the jewel toned purples and yellows i would wear that the media would say are meant to look good . im kinda getting emotional watching this hhh the reassurance is rlly nice
My mom ruins all of it. I like a emo/tomboy style but she always says stuff like “God gave me a girl not a boy plus it makes you look fat and ridiculous”
Once you own it, it's like a breath of fresh air. Living your life, your way, is the best way.
I now realize I have been skipping steps... X'DD I just showed up to school one day with pink hair and a coat with bunny ears and pink ribbons lmao
i love that!! ❤
@@cybrgrl OH MY GOD- I wasn't expecting a reply! I love how you dress it's just so amazing aaaa
If my parent just made fun of me or didnt like how i dresses but didnt literally force me to change and throw things away that i like this would be a lot easier, im not allowed to were makeup because "i look like a clown/it makes me look too much older" and honestly its bullshit.
i actually enjoy the weird looks i get, it means i caused some sort of impact on that persons day XD also PLEEEASE more decora on a budget vids! your tips were soo helpful ❤️💛💝💙💙💜💚
Mary Kurosawa that’s a good mindset to have! I’ll try my best to do more of those ☺️💖 I’m starting my Decora series next week~
Y'all my mother is a conservative Christian, and she knows I'm a lesbian. I'd say I'm more femme lesbian, but I would also like to wear some pride stuff. She won't let me wear anything that acknowledges I'm gay, and she won't let me dress the way I want, and makes fun of what I want to wear. I really want her to understand that it makes me feel shitty about myself whoever she makes me wear a tan sweater and blue jeans to school. Idek it use doesn't feel like me
Thank you for this? I came across this video on accident and so far its helping me. I've been wanting to dress differently but anxiety, self confidence, dysphoria and a lack of clothing that makes me truly happy... are major road blocks.
I want to dress a bit more colorful but with the rise in conflict I'm scared of being a easy target for violence since I'm in something "unique." Bright clothing is basically a bulls eye for anyone with a long range weapon Sad how I have to worry about that but this is our world now.
Edit: not sure if decora fashion is my thing, it looks fun but might be a bit too colorful for me, could try a more toned down version, i love colors but intense colors can give me overload. I love pastels but i also do love some neons too... maybe its time to invent my own unique style. I have a sewing machine so maybe i can create my own pieces with older clothing... now i regret getting rid of my bright blue pants, they were too tight but those would have made interesting shirt sleeves
i really have a pastel cute style but i’m scared to go out with the style bcuz my parents will judge me and people will judge me :((((
Me too!!!!!! 😭
It's okay to feel uncomfy! but I really believe that taking baby steps as said in the video will really help you. I had an emo/scene style back in middle school and I loved wearing it so much that I never cared what anyone thought of me really, It honestly helped me make genuine friends who loved my style and accepted me as the person I am. SO just be you! and it's okay to take baby steps in order to achieve your dream aesthetic :)
@@spiritlxss tysm ur amazing 😭💗
im not even allowed to dye my hair bc my stepdad sees someonne expressing themself and just goes off about how insecure they are and how they dont want people to see who they really are but its the opposite :/
This is such a sweet video and really helpful for people in any subcultures or fashion and even just in general
I'm a punk and I've kinda just started living to see people's reactions. Its made me realise I'm a bigger person than the people staring or making rude comments but also could be inspiring and helping a lot of others out there
yeahhhhi i love this attitude, i cant wait to see people's reactions i think it will be funny at worst, and friend-making at best >:P
I can't shop online so I'm not able to wear exactly what I want, but my fashion sense is not quite the same as a normal person. It's funny because before quarantine I would only wear a black hoodie, a t-shirt and leggings. Now I'm happy to wear a skirt out.
I'm not even in Japanese fashion, but you video was sooooo helpful!!! I'm always afraid of wear mi style (kind of glamorous cottagecore) but always ends wearing hoodies and jeans. Thank you sososoosoooo much you are amazing!!!!
Glamorous cottagecore sounds amazing 😚
Thx for the amazing advice! I’m young and I’m getting into Kawaii fashion and I had a toxic friend who basically would laugh at me for everything She laughed at my style me liking gacha/anime content and she even laughed and made fun of a baby picture of me… they really lowered my self confidence a lot but I’m working on cutting off bad and toxic people out of my life and embracing my inner and outer beauty and style! ❤️
I wish I could hug you through the screen. ❤️ I think this applies to self confidence in general. I just gotta stop judging myself and do what I want!
*internet hugs!!* YES YOU GOT THIS AND I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!
I dress more goth but I ADORE this style and your channel, this video is really helpful :,) 🖤
Watched this video 1 year ago and now I wear what I want
It's incredible
i'm proud of you
@@cybrgrl
Thank you
My personal style lately is late 90s, early and mid 2000s, 2000s punk girl (more like inspo from Bratz Rock Angelz and Bratz Pretty N Punk dolls) and cute and cool anime girl fashion (think Misa Amane and Nana for example). Where I’m from almost everyone is a little more conservative and basic. I’m literally sick to death of suppressing my true style and aesthetics because I’m terrified of getting judged and getting nasty stares. But you know what I’ve decided fuck it life is too short to not be your true self and to care what some sad and miserable people think of you. It’s THEIR loss, not yours, because you’re the one having a good time and not them. They’re the ones missing out because they don’t have the confidence to be themselves so they take it out on others who actually do. They’re just miserable and sometimes I even pity them because they must have really sad and boring lives. I have social anxiety so you can imagine that I HATE when all the attention is on me but I’m gonna try to rock my style and act like a mfn queen and embrace the glares and be like “yeah I’m fuckin cool and fabulous, must suck to not have style like me” 💅🏻👑✨
☺
I wear regular clothes, but the thing that always makes me not give a sh*t about what people think is the fact that they actually don’t think anything they just want to be rude bc they see you (in their perspective!) as a potential victim and try to bring you down because their parents and/or other peopl made them have a low self-esteem so they want to make someone feel bad about themselves so that they will feel good about themselves.
It will still feel weird being the center of (any kind of) attention because that’s normal but you get used to it.
Anyone else see someone dressing in the style that you have in your wardrobe but you’re too scared to wear, then get upset and sad cuz they have the confidence to wear it and they look amazing…?
I started to get more confident in wearing decora (and just confident in general) some months ago. it first took me a lot of time to find my style and you helped with that ! When I found your TH-cam channel I already knew I love decora fashion. Right know I'm wearing kandi and colorful necklaces, and I stardet wearing a bit makeup! I'm still learning more about decora fashion and gaining more confidence. Thank you for this video.
I’ve been obsessed with various gothic/alt styles since I was little and Monster High first came out. Now I’m older and recently bought my first article of nu goth clothing and I have my nana’s gothic boots from the 80s so I’m excited.
Thank you so much for this video :) It was really helpful. I am a baby goth but I have social anxiety and the unwanted attention I get when I am dressed in my goth clothes in public makes me really uncomfortable sometimes and triggers my anxiety, especially when I am at school. I am really working on trying to feel more comfortable dressing how I like and not caring so much about other people’s opinions :)
Btw I love your style, it’s so cool 💖
Well I am mostly afraid of men bc they can be really agressive
I would like to wear more kinky? Alt fashion like Nana from anime Nana or mini skirts but ugh i dont want old men catcalling me especially when i go late or alone
Thank you so much for video)
i live in austin too! i dress more goth but i want to explore j fashion, i’d love to bump into u some day 🥺
your style is literally so gorgeous 🥺💕
Personally I just want to have enough confidence to wear red lipstick, pink, florals, ruffles, bows, feminine and girly clothes. I am always afraid of people mistaking me for Barbie and underestimating my intelligence, especially because I am a natural blonde.
Do it!!! You got this :)))
you're personality just seems so nice and just makes me smile
I'm already confident with myself but imma watch anyways :>>>
THAT'S GREAT!
my style is more gutter punk-ish but i ADORE decora! I'd love to dye my hair neon green and wear cute hair clips and everything colorful. I'm definitely going to work on getting cute accessories and outfits. you've inspired me! Much love! 💛
I feel like this video came at the perfect time. I had smthn on that felt a little too dressy, that I felt nervous wearing bcs I rarely ever dress up and it felt like smthn ppl would judge me for. :/
I’ve always had a soft spot for colorful, fun stuff. Now I’m wanting to Re-decorate my room now.
This is really good advice. I have been asked this question a lot over my life since I have dressed in alt styles for over ten years. I wear something very similar to decora now its like if you mixed the dopamine dressing trend with decora that's essentially my style nowadays. I only wear extremely bright colours and loud big makeup and fun colours in my hair. I was a very insecure child and definitely dressed for other people for a while. Then I think I was 13 or so when I just decided I didn't care anymore. It does take time to get to a point where you won't mind the stares, because there will be people that stare at you. How I take it now when I get stared at is that they just love my outfit, most people actually really like bright styles as they see them cheery and happy. My partner and I are both alt and we both are very used to the staring. Tbh after a while it becomes fun going out all dressed up.
I'm slowly buying clothes for my style, oddly I feel way better in the most dramatic clothing (not that dramatic, just not the most normal, like platform shoes, and stuff like that)
Thank you so much for uploading this!!! This made me feel more confident and comfortable with myself in what I want to wear!! (I’m inspired by mall goth 90s fashion and Fruits magazine!!) again thank you so much for uploading this :>
Aaa tysm for making this! I'm starting to wear kawaii fashion, but I've been a little nervous since I wear more modest clothing, I also have trouble finding knee length pleated skirts.
omg i have the same issueeee !!!! it feels good to know im not the only one XD
@the cutest snail i am obsessed wif aliexpress but i cant ever find any with colors or patterns i like 😭
@the cutest snail tysmmm 💕 you are a life saver bc i got so tired of wearing black skirtsss sksksjjsjs
@the cutest snail oooo i will look into it and yea same lol i recently bought a frog hat bc why not 😂
@@AsaMarshall for real! I can never find any cute pastel colored skirts
I’m so happy you made a video on this topic for those getting into dressing more true to themselves!!
Starting out can be really scary! :( I never thought I’d have the courage to dress the way I do now, and even just recently when I went out, people were giving me dirty looks, pointing, giggling, etc.
Where in the past I would’ve panicked and wanted to hide, now I just mostly feel bad for those people for being so close-minded and feeling like they have to pick on someone for no good reason.
As obvious as it sounds, you need to remind yourself that if people react negatively towards you simply for dressing the way that makes you happy, you are NOT the problem.
Have a nice day/night everyone!! 💕
My style is kinda a mix of different styles, mostly babyish/childish style, pastel doll, and lots of pink and unicorns :)
I feel the cutest and prettiest when i wear what i love, and my family (except my dad because he's religious) and my friends are very supportive, but i get a lot of stares and comments from strangers. Some of them are good but some are not so nice.. but it doesn't bother me at all because i know this is my life, my body, what makes me love myself more and be happier. I know im cute and beautiful and they can stay mad and keep wearing their boring clothes 😂
Just be confident with what you decide to wear and realize that nobody own your life and body except from YOU ❤️
You inspired me so much to find my style, and when I finally found it I didn't really have the confidence. So thank you for making this video 😊💗
this is SO HELPFUL, thank you!! many people's advice is "just do it!", but baby steps are so comforting 🥺❤️
Scene kid here! I'm slowly building the confidence to dress more scene, but it's hard to do that when simply wearing black shorts with striped tights underneath result in weird looks. Luckily, there's an alt girl in my programming class that likes my style and her compliments really make me feel better about myself. My mom also loves my style and is always looking for clothes she thinks I might like ^_^
thank you so much for this video ! i'm interested in gothic lolita style, trying to build up courage for myself since i don't have the support of my family. i can just say taking small steps helps alot. thank you.
kyoshi 🥺 i love your hat !! also gonna start linking ppl this video if they ask how to be confident because you said everything and so well !!! 💓
Emillu Mika, holy crap you’re here! Can’t wait for new uploads from you💖
@@rooby3616 ahh thank you, im trying to get back on it 💗
you really did me like this? i will fall asleep before this :'(
I’m so sorryyyy T___T I’ll still be here for you whenever you do wake up again! ~
@@cybrgrl ill be back in 8 hours! :p
itsilonahere x sweet dreams! 💖
@@cybrgrl oop- atleast i came back
@@ilonap2566 welcome back!!!
Commenting from a few years down the road to say that this has been one of my comfort videos for quite a while now. Also that you dress the way I wished I could when I was like 8, and you inspired me to get a neon plaid skirt that I found at a thrift store :D
I watch your videos when I need to remember the good people in fashion. I'm a designer too and the fashion world is rough. You have created such a lovely corner of the internet, thank you 💫
I SO needed to hear all this stuff. Thank you so much for making this. I may need to re-evaluate my closet and try more style experiments. So far I am really loving Uchuu Kei but my interests vary so much that I will likely combine several styles together to be more me. Again, this is such an amazing video, thank you.
I’m a Jirai-Kei girl and I live in an East Asian country, so there are quite many girls who wear jirai fashion as well so I’m mostly confident in my own country. The thing is I’m going to study and move to Canada and I’m scared that people around there will not be familiar with this fashion and will look at me weirdly.
I used to always be scared to go outside in super color full outfits (not decora or kidcore just colorful) but now I just like to wear whatever I want not to impress anyone just to be myself!
this is so helpful because I really wanna dress scene/emo but currently the style is popular because of the amount of bullying 😭😭
dont listen to them! they are jealous of your drip
It's the rawring 20's x3
You are wise beyond your years. This video is going to do a lot of good for a ton of people. Plus, it is always a good reminder for everyone...including myself. Thank you very much for the excellent content.
as someone in the process of transitioning, these are great steps too. I got used to wesring my binder at home first before wearing it to the corner shop. After a few days of these smaller steps, I wore it to work.
Hey i'm so happy for you! 🏳️⚧️
CubsGirl there is a girl in my class who where’s Decor faction like everyday and This video makes me feel so much better about what I wear and Honestly I just want to say I am also secretly a decor fashion lover even though I almost only wear black. But I also just want to say I know this video not only, effects me but also effects other people on how they dress.
I don't wear jfashion atm, but I do want to become more confident in dressing as I like. I don't think women should have to shave, which is unusual by "fashionable" standards. I have felt this way since high school, and I have slowly allowed more people to see me with hairy legs. I will still shave for the summer and for special occasions though. I built my confidence up over years too, but by bit.
You have no idea how much this video means to me, I always come back to it when I feel insecure haha
I have a colorful style and it’s not super out of the ordinary, but the compliments I get make me feel so confident about myself!! so I’ve been trying to compliment other people more but it’s hard because I’m kinda awkward lol
I was really afraid to talk with my mom about lolita fashion. I show her a picture of a lolita on pinterest and I talked to her about lolita fashion and she said "oh, I alr know what lolita fashion is, when you show me some clothes I did research and I knew you like that type of style, there is nothing wrong with you wearing it, except for the price"
The way I see it, (I live for drama so-)
Either nothing happens and you go about your day looking fabulous, or you get a funny story.
In other words, you can have a TH-cam story time if anybody says anything.
your personality is literally angelic
TYSM FOR THIS VIDEO!! i wear minimal decora / kawaii / lolita style clothes and i was kinda afraid at first but after watching this i decided to start wearing it in public and i surprisingly got a lot of compliments!!
I think I’m going to wear my modern Victorian inspired dress to school tomorrow...
I’m so scared I’m always super insecure but I love the dress because it’s comfortable and it’s not form fitting but it’s vintage and I’m so scared people will think I’m weird So wish me laughing clothes I guess 😟🍀
My parents won't allow me to dress alt/Gothic/punk and I've been told by them when I wear something I like they tell me that I should change because it doesn't look right. I even feel like I can't really wear or do stuff when I want to I barely wear a skirt or dress around them because I lack confidence. I really hope when I finally get to move out I'll finally be able to gain the confidence and wear what I like to wear! Also I love your hair clips they are so cute!
its my siblings that make me feel so unconfident
saying i cant wear a bucket hat cause "it doesnt look good on me"
So i have bought my own and i dont Listen to em anymore
i id'd as a trans guy for awhile but i've really been wanting to wear skirts and bright colourful clothes recently, my parents are supportive of me being trans 100% (buti id as nonbinary now which i haven't mentioned >_>)!! but i've already established like oooh i hate dresses and 'girly' stuff etc but man i really just wanna wear bright rainbow and skirts now lol T~T sorry for rambling ahah, but thank you for making this video!!!!
nice hilbert pfp >:3 also this reminds me of how i currently identify as a nb transfem, but i still like androgynous, leaning masculine clothing and ill probably relearn to like masculine clothing like suits and such once im more confident with myself
This is so wholesome and uplifting! Thank you for such good content. I wish more people thought like this and understood that people can wear whatever the hell they want and can't dictate how other should live their lives. More self-expression and less judgment!