Jealous Wife Shoots Entire Family Prior to Narcissistic Denial Episode | John and Sungnam Lisowski
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 ก.พ. 2024
- This video answers the question: Can I analyze case of John and Sungnam Lisowski?
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"That didn't happen. And if it did, it wasn't that bad. And if it was, it wasn't my fault. And if it was, I didn't mean it. And if I did... You deserved it."
The Narcissist's Poem
Thank you, I wrote this down to take to my shrink.
Brilliant. 👍🏻
Going to use this.
Oh crap. Yeah. Yes. This is true. I'm shook.
. . . known colloquially as "mom" or "pop" (short for papa), in my experience
Bingo!
The fact that the girls knew their mother was poisoning them and told their dad and he just said “I hope not” shows the extreme denial he was in!
Wrong. He was already heavily drugged from what she put in the coke. That's why he sounded that way
She picked him because he'd not stand up to her
After he saw his wife eating the dogs of the family be became numb to everything
My father is weird like this. I think He abused us Kids because he felt inferior to my mothers wrath
The scariest thing about narcissists isn't what they do, but what they can convince you and others to do. What kind of person they can convince you to become.
If you have decided to leave your partner, dont announce your departure. Just leave.
💯💯💯💯 this cannot be understated. Let them find you and all of your shit vacated when they get home one day - and that goes whether you are a MAN OR A WOMAN in a bad relationship! People do crazy shit
And don’t just leave your kids behind…
I AGREE 11 HE DOES bear SOME Responsibility, without a doubt !!
If you can, trick them to leave.
Well, that’s if you’re in a really toxic and abusive relationship. Otherwise, definitely don’t do that.
The kids noticing the white stuff in their sodas and thinking their mom is trying to poison them all, is quite telling.
Yeah that's pretty dumb,, an intelligent psycho would just grind up the benzodiazepine pills, put them in a half cup of distilled water,, let the drug dissolve in the water and then pour off the water and leave the pill - gunk in the cup... THEN,, divide up the clear water in however many doses you want, and viola,, add a lethal dose in solution... about an ounce should be sufficient because if you put 90 pills in 4 oz of water, 1 oz would be equivalent to 22 1/2 pills..... Goodbye and adieu to you Spanish ladies, goodbye and adieu to ladies of Spain......
That's so messed up. As horrible as this is, ultimately at least it saved their lives that they were already expecting her to kill them. It seems like there wasn't actually any poison in there (or I missed that bit). But if they hadn't expected it from her, they likely would have been too startled and in disbelief to fight their mother when she was shooting them. No surprise element left for the psychopath.
@@murphychurch8251 Ya, it was possibly the powder she emptied from some sleeping pill, capsules.
My children realized their father didn't love them and they were afraid he would kill them. Thankfully, he got most of the financial benefits and I got the kids, as he only pretended to want them, as he told me he would, but he did severely harm us psychologically, economically, and directly and indirectly physically in the process. It was a nightmare navigating our way out safely, and I was told to stand up for myself by a therapist who didn't understand the danger I was in. It worked very briefly but alerted him to become much more covert, which he used against me in family court, and the process was terrorizing. @@murphychurch8251
That likely means she talked about killing their father somewhat frequently.
She is evil but who emails their wife/husband to tell them you want a divorce because you have a new lover?
I'm thinking this came from Sungnam herself
@@xxxxxxxxx3944he did have a lover and was a delusional coward though not violent.
he was probably cheating on her for years since he traveled a lot and was fed up with his wife acting weird.
Really? That's what you're concerned about after hearing all of this?
Really? That’s not what this is about.
he must have been some kind of idiot to tell his wife that he had a new lover
Trying to make her jealous
He did it to put her down, to praise himself.
Some men do it.
A kind and mature man will deliver a message in the way that it keeps his wife’s dignity together.
Why any woman needs to be told in details in written notice that "your husband is now in love with a different woman, therefore, he needs to get rid of you to start a new happy life, and your kids will be raised by his new lover"?
he set himself for issues
He was possibly on an emotional high, but it was an incredibly stupid thing to do. I think a lot of people never think that an abusive person will go as far as murder.
I'm guessing his new lover demanded he tell her, so as not to keep her a secret
Maybe he thought she'd be happy to see them all go, since she treated them all so badly. At the very least he must have thought there was nothing she could do to stop him leaving, and maybe he figured the girls were old enough and would be able to leave soon too. Clearly the possibility of murder was not on his mind. He did not understand the type of person she was.
If only he'd snuck away with the kids and not told her in advance......
Sometimes when I get an Amber alert I wonder if that's what's going on.
An immature creep.
Why ?? So that just as they become teenagers they could grow up in a country most rich people buy their way out of & poor people try run away from ??
@@j3suisd3 He had a lot more money than most living in China. They would have been fine. Living like kings.
@@j3suisd3 so rather stay with a murderous and abusive parent...???
Anddddd THIS is why therapists tell you not to announce your escape from the narcissist! I feel like this is what happened with Chad Doerman too (guy who killed his 3 young boys in front of their mother). If you suspect your spouse is a narc, find out the best way to leave without triggering them (if there are no kids involved- just leave in the middle of the night). Or risk this happening.
Better find out before dating such individual...
Leave with nothing but your pocketbook if you have to!
@@lisagreene1458 The most important thing would be not forgetting your smart phone, otherwise how are you going to post about your ordeal on social media. 🤣
True! But not for social media purposes. For 911
@@jltaco85 Please no ! it's always the same story again and again.
When a psychopath is facing the loss of their preferred daily victims and lifestyle, it can almost be guaranteed that the departure will not end well.
Millions of men have learned this the hard way.
@@spinetingler-op6st Words of Truth
At that point, they have nothing to lose...
@@spinetingler-op6stAnd billions of women
@nicky132 - well said.
I had a similarly deranged mother who started out by telling me that she'd kill me if she got too depressed. I was seven. She would punish me in similar ways, where I'd have to hold an uncomfortable position for hours at a time, often for irrational or make-believe reasons. My mother is also from Asia and there are lots of corporal punishments like that. She used to keep a big oak walking stick to beat me with, and she would ask me to retrieve her stick at random times, just to see how I would react. Things got a lot worse after my parents split up (father was an addict and unable to be a parent at all). I cut her off after she held a knife to my throat on Lunar New Year; the adrenaline kicked in and I got free, bolted out the door, and ran two miles to my then-boyfriend's house. When I hear stories like this, I am reminded of why I went NC with her and changed my name. It puts the scolding of the "But it's your mother" people out of my head -- yeah, she's my mother, but she's also a violent narcissist who told me on multiple occasions to take my own life. Glad the girls survived. Hope they were able to get support and guidance from good people.
Her own life story as a child must be dark. You did right in your choices. Stay well.
Best wishes. Stay safe. 💙
People will often try to shame others for their past decisions without any understanding of the context or what that person was going through or dealing with and what they had to do for their own survival and what was best for themself.
went to a school where the head mistress, a nun, did this. she was truly psychopathic. none of the adults did anything. I can only imagine what was done to her to make her like this. and I was one of the favoured ones. many others faired far worse than me, from psychological terror to broken arms and canings and standing for hours. it felt like post war ptsd being put onto little kids. even the teachers were terrified of her. this must be a particular kind of disorder, beyond narcissism and psychopathy.
I’m so sorry. My suggestion is to say… I pour the precious blood of Jesus between her and I and I break that soul tie and I denounce any self harm or suicidal intentions in Jesus’ name Amen”. That just is so deeply offensive for someone to suggest you off yourself. You are worthy of love and a wonderful life❤ take care
Given her nature, it was very, VERY thoughtless for him to send an email announcing the breakup. He should have been present for that in case his daughters needed protection.
In domestic violence situations like this, whether you are male or female, never let the bad guys/bad gals win by letting them know that you are leaving and taking the kids with you.
My first thought.
My first thought. He sent that email and ignored red flags. He said that he wanted to protect his daughters but failed to do so
@@nanettevantriesteharder2469but you do it in a safe way. You don’t send email, knowing very well it will trigger your partner.
Ahhh, the old victim blaming trope
For him to call her from China, declare that he's got somebody else and he want s a divorce from her, who is known to be unstable and alone with his children, is not only extremely cold, but profoundly thoughtless. He didn't even consider what his kids would go through. Frankly, he's as much a narcissist as she is.
I personally think she shouldn't be charged with his murder. That was a suicide far as I can see.
@@michaelwaninger3155🙄
Uhhh no he’s not. The word narcissist is soooo over used nowadays it’s just cringe asf now ee 🤮
I think he was scared of her.
how out of touch with reality you have to be to compare his behaviour with hers ☠ he was a bit reckless, she was a full blown psycho. typical victim blaming
My narcissistic mother would talk about poison all the time. I was convinced she was poisoning me or the rest of the family. I don’t talk to her anymore. My step father divorced her and me and my siblings don’t talk to her. I could see her doing something like this lady.
My mum too. She'd often say, "One day when you eat my food it will be poisoned, you'll never know.". She did and said worse but yeah, she was a lot like this person.
I don't even understand how some people can be so out of control. Don't get me wrong, my mom is a raging egomaniac but not to these levels.
@@Aaron-kj8dvi mean , if you admit your mom is a maniac she s pretty much in the same boat as these other ones , i guess some mothers take out their life frustrations on their children , i can totally see an unhapoy mom or neglected mom seeing her children as the reason why she s feeling unhappy ? Wich happens more often than we think im sure , this of course is just a theory , my opinion as Dr G would say
peace✌🏼
😂 boo hoo
@@poopy-333hey! That's a classic narcissistic response! Well done, you are a narc.
My narcissistic mother would drive erratically to punish me also. I was in a really bad car accident when I was 6, a head-on collision on the highway where 3 people died. She used my PTSD from that accident against me. Hearing that this mom did something similar sent chills down my spine
Im so sorry, and glad you are alive and safe now 🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂💝🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂
my dad did the same shit (driving erratically to punish me) youre not alone and i hope you’re recovering well 🫶🏽
That's awful! I hope you are safe now and away from her abuse.
My mom used to drive erratically with me and my brothers in the car. It was so scary, the feeling of helplessness knowing there wasn’t anything I could do to protect my younger brothers in that moment. I really thought she would kill us one day. It’s interesting to read these comments and see that it’s, sadly, a common thing.
He made a classic mistake as someone who makes excuses for his abusive partner. He gave her the benefit of a doubt when it came to kids; falsely believing that she loved them more than herself as her abuse was only towards him.
This false belief was what he used to keep himself in that marriage for so long. It was an unmerited hope that he and his children sadly paid the price for.
“Remember, I’m never wrong, and even when I’m wrong, I’m not wrong” - narcissistic ex-wife
I’m so thankful for my parents. I honestly believe they were the best parents in the whole world, but they died way too young.😢
So sorry ❤
If they were good parents I have no doubt they raised a good person and they are very proud of you
Awww. I’m glad to hear you had such wonderful parents though.
Me, too.
Sorry for your loss
I had lovely parents, thank God. I can't even imagine what it must be like for children trying to figure out the madness.
I love these stay single, and stay alive stories.
That is not the moral or take away from this story. You do not need to stay single to stay alive and to believe so is a different form or mental illness.
Just incel thoughts
@@SolidSiren Bettter take away is don't get involved or associated with people that are clearly dangerous.
@SolidSiren Calm down. You took that a bit personally.
Since 9/10 times it's the spouse or partner that committed the murder, I'd say it's a great reason to stay single!
@@TheDramacist By that logic, 9/10 elevator-related deaths affect the people inside the elevator, so it's a great reason to not get in one. But you fail to mention the possibility of the outcome you are trying to avoid, and you also fail to acknowledge that the chances of that negative outcome doesn't affect everyone evenly. Your relationship skills (ability to choose a partner, communication, not breaking up with your wife via email, ability to sense when mental health is becoming an issue, etc) will greatly affect how susceptible you are to the outcome you are trying to avoid. It is easily avoided in other ways.
When you leave a narcissist or an abuser leave in silence. Don't announce it. Just go and let your lawyer or a middle man contact the abuser.
Stay sober and vigilant ! He was living in a daydream, didn't see the monster in front of him.
Those cops were NOT from Uvalde!
😂Exactly my thoughts.
LOL! It seems a lot of us had the same thought. 😂
Aurora IL police are real men 🌹❤🇺🇸
with nice healthy big BAWLS@@BrookdaleBroker
The Uvalde cowards will never be forgotten. The most pathetic cops in history.
Chris: I think Mom is trying to poison us.
John: YOLO **chug chug chug**
😂
Omg 😅
Ha!
Bruh 😜💀
As a single dad for two teenage girls, I am horrified by the behavior of this psychopath. Kudos to the police for putting her in jail finally.
She wasn't a psychopath. Just a malignant narcissist.
Yes it's terrible but women deal with this at a much higher rate from men
@PB_324 you sound like a narcissist who just cant let someone else be a victim just one time huh. But but but women. Yeah everyone knows
@@gary_rumain_you_peons Agreed. Stop giving people any excuse, sometimes there are just people with horrible personalities with no empathy. What a nasty human being!
@@gary_rumain_you_peonsshe’s a psychopath.
I wonder how many families live like this, just short of homicide, for years if not for a lifetime. 😞
dear wife, i have a new lover, want a divorce and the kids. the kids will be relocating to china to be raised by my new lover. sincerely yours no longer
It possibly can trigger a huge resentment to any healthy loving person. Not to mention a mentally unwell wife.
He had some serious issues as well. That was off the chain.
That was a horrible email to send your wife. No matter what the state of your relationship was
To be fair she was a terrible wife.
He didn't protect his children! He didn't even try.
@@happyinparis the mother did much worse
I always feel so bad for the children in situations like this. They're always the ones that suffer the most for their narcissistic parent's sins. Sungnam was a violent domestic abuser same as any man.
Hope Victoria and Christine are doing well.
It’s called a trauma bond. Speaking from personal experience, it is hard to recognize when you are in the midst of one. The unconscious is a powerful thing. :(
Unconscious people are known to be quite powerful!
I knew about trauma bonds but I never thought it could happen unconsciously. I realize that I have been in one. Ended the “friendship “ but I still think about her and I want fair resolution. Thanks for texting this. I was trauma bonded to her abuse and my trying to explain her wrong doings to her, thinking she would actually hear me for once. I kept thinking - if only I could explain it just right then she’d know and stop hurting me. But she wouldn’t have! We were trauma bonded. I can let this go now. She never would have stopped.
It's like a chicken in a tornado.
The chicken is so busy trying to stay alive in the chaos that is can't see all thr danger and trash. Only after the tornado is over does the chicken sèe all the damage
"I hope not." Famous last words.
Damn that's poignant as f though you know it? Poor guy was just too mellow for his own good...
Or: 'I can't breeve'
@@micnorton9487he was a idiot. He told her another woman was going to take her kids then went back home and thought nothing of it?
@@Drkbardockssj He was but still,, I hate to blame a victim......
@@micnorton9487 yes but we do a disservice not blaming victims sometimes. Sometimes victims hold some blame.
This woman was the whole DSM5
Everybody’s gangster until Grande moves to the timeline of the crime.❤
That just made me snort with laughter!
Malignant narcissism possibly meets bipolar disorder- geezus this is terrifying. My dad was a narc/bipolar/sadist and hearing this story- I consider myself lucky!
What a combination.....smh
The extension is being of the Korean culture. John also took no consideration that his Korean wife would be accepting to a Chinese female counterpart raising her daughters. There was a foundation of ignorance on John's part.
Being Korean is no excuse for murdering your family. Don't infantilize this grown-ass woman.
“Impolite word for sex-worker that rhymes with ‘door’”
😂😂😂
Knock knock 🚪 come in…😂
😂😂😂
Bore.
@@mobilegameplaywalkthroughs990More... Gore... Wore... Smore... Lahore lol...
🤣😂
“…John may have been more afraid of living without a romantic partner. Some people just need to have a lover, even if that lover is toxic…”. This is something I’ll never understand. Life is too short to be in a miserable relationship. Also, it’s similar to people who go from one relationship to the next over and over. They just can’t seem to live on their own.
Desperation, thinking you won't find someone better, lead people to stay in toxic relationships.
that's because you have a semblance of emotional self sufficiency
She was Violent, Cruel, and Abusive!
And he was WONDERFUL 😖
Typical ∆$!@n culture
And that was her *nice* side.
I wish he had come home, taken the kids out the house then gone back and told her that he wanted a divorce.
@@shredderhatervictim blaming 🤡
If you're going to demand a divorce, you better have all of your stuff packed and a new place to go to immediately.
Those poor girls. They are so beautiful. The worse thing John could do is announce he wanted a divorce and not go through with it immediately. He put it off too long.
Hindsight. How'd you know something to that extent would happen.
@@Oldkekistaniyou should, given she was treated for her mental condition prior. And why would you push/ place more stress on an unstable wife.
Of course she was wrong, very wrong as well
That and you don't tell loonies that until you're WAY over there
Good thing those girls are so beautiful. Oh the love. So beautiful. So beautiful.
Greetings from Thailand, love your channel Dr. Grande. I grew up with a narcissistic east Asian grandparent. I don't miss those years at all.
I love being single for life, no kids, and loving it.
Amen😄
Mmh because people who actually love it need to stop to say they love it haha
@@JustMe-fo4evyes 😅
I have a grown daughter and even though I love her I can say for sure that single and childless is a good way to be! Those who go the partner-parenthood route are fulfilling a necessary evolutionary imperative. Great. OR you can be free and really happy if you’re not brainwashed into thinking you’ve missed something. You haven’t.
@@user-lj4xs4gn8u Hopefully she reads this
She was a typical traditional Korean mother who grew up in the 70s. Judging by her name, which seems rural and masculine even by Korean standards, she probably was a country girl who wasn't well-educated. I'm curious as to how the couple ended up together. People in the west have no idea how culturally different people are from other parts of the world. Older Koreans are Confucian through and through. This means they have no identity apart from group identity. That's why she killed herself after committing the crime. The punishments Dr Grande mentioned will seem abusive to Americans, but even up to the 90s and 00s, those were standard punishments for Korean children.
The Standard punishment was still abusive
He seemed awful in his emailing divorce and custody.
"People in the west have no idea how culturally different people are from other parts of the world." That's because political correctness has brainwashed many westerners into believing all people are"just like us" and "the same". Judging someone based on their behavior or culture is "wrong" and "prejudiced" and yet not doing so costs many people their lives. Prejudice or pre-judging someone or a situation is how the brain helps us avoid problems and stay safe.
@@janetdonald9801
Filing for Divorce= Murder.
Mmkay.
@@annaess3844how the mother used it was indeed abusive.
However...it's easy to use the term about another culture, when all it means is that it's different than you choose to discipline. Is standing nose in a corner worse than holding ones arms up for the same length of time? Same thing.
it's too bad that John didn't move in silence with his plans instead of announcing his intentions. if he could have gotten the girls and himself away to safety, then told her he wanted a divorce, he would probably still be alive. sad situation indeed.
That would have been reasonable, since he and his children were indeed victims of domestic violence and child abuse. The problem is that, even if they are miserable in marriages or in girlfriend-boyfriend relationships, in which they are subservient to their more dominant spouses or lovers, heterosexual men do not want to perceive themselves as victims, in which they might become depressed over thinking that they are weak and ineffectual. So, they do the supposedly honorable thing in the interim by self medicating to numb the pain. Yet, it is not honorable to cheat. It makes no sense whatsoever to alert your dark tetrad abuser of your intent to leave to protect yourself and your children, let alone for the arms of another. That is like a matador teasing a charging narcissistic beast by waving a red cape in its face.
You can't just take off with someone's kids, tho. That's the big problem here.
I agree. Why would he email something like that? And from China!
@@windsofmarchjourneyperrytr2823 Those were his kids, too. He could have taken them anywhere in the world as their father before family court got involved through a petition of divorce through his lawyer. Because he had abdicated his position of leadership within the family to his wife, he was not thinking strategically in not draining the money from their bank accounts to support the kids and himself. In its translation as "Never do an enemy a small injury." in Chapter 3 of The Prince, this is probably what Machiavelli would have advised, I think. The problem was that he was really not thinking with the head above his shoulders at all, which got him in this horrible position in the first place.
@@S.H.A.D.O.999 right. I could see doing it if there were no children involved but with having kids in the picture, it would have been better to get home, get them away from her. The kids and himself.
Terrible to keep reloading & chasing, can't imagine the terror involved. What a narcissistic, evil woman. Glad there were survivors. Great points as usual. Thanks Dr G😊💘💘
Funny, I zeroed in on the reloading part too. I think it just shows that it wasn't an emotional thing but even something where she could've naturally stopped and taken a breath and realized what she was doing but she thought it through to the point to have more ammo ready to reload.
@@Aaron-kj8dv Exactly. That's ice cold. You have to really be thinking bad thoughts to keep reloading as shows another level of anger & evil. That terror of hiding or running from a maniac...oh my I can't imagine 😑🥺
Do we think maybe the mom went thru serious abuse from her mother? My mom was a monster and I left as soon as I could but I always wanted to know why and then learned she was a narcissist. But what made her that way?
Those girls were strong kids.
Both parents were narcissistic. The mother was sociopathic too.
The husband has his guilt in the drama. He treated the wife as an object.
Many cases like this. Two narcissistic parents with the antisocial one killing the family. They all ended the same.
💯 agree
When a vulnerable narcissist who is masochistic meets a grandiose narcissist who is sadistic and they fall into codependent love because they are mirror images of each other, most likely the latter will win the survival game.
Wife treated him as a punching bag but man as always bad, clearly.
Man bad!
I an soooo glad my mother left my father when my brother and I were small,3 and 5. The only real memory I have of him is drunkenness and verbal abuse. I left my so called church member husband when my kids were 3 and 5. I wish I had done it earlier or never married him. I apparently have poor judgment and will never do that again. Why must a child live through a bad marriage?
The problem is that most people are too immature and lack the personal insight into who they are and what is best for them. They follow the same dysfunctional patterns they saw in childhood. So, nothing changes across the human developmental life span from one generation to the next, unless individuals choose to break free from past mistakes in order to live a better quality of life for themselves.
“This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.”
― William Shakespeare, Hamlet
@nanettevantriesteharder2469 true. It took me a while to understand and a bunch of counseling.
You just repeated what your mother did.
What a nightmare. Those poor girls.
As someone with a narcissistic mother, this is literally my worst nightmare. I have gone to bed many times wondering if my dad would still be alive by the time I woke up.
I can't imagine the pain those poor girls have gone through. I hope they were able to find happy, stable homes with better people.
They never returned to their Aurora home. An uncle living in a northeastern state took them in, and they live in that area today.
I remember the Bible verse framed in our kitchen growing up..."Better is a dinner of herbs where love is, than a stalled ox and hatred therewith"
We didnt have much growing up but we were raised in a Christian home. My parents were not perfect but did their best to raise us. We did eat a lot of vegetables because we cant afford fancy food.
We were able to graduate and have decent jobs.
My parents died young and I miss them. My faith keeps me going that they are with my Savior, and we will see each other once more.
The daughters are so impressive for saving themselves! That must have been absolutely terrifying. I hope they are doing well now.
Let this video serve as a warning to everybody in similar circumstances. I feel fortunate that I came to see my narc ex girlfriend as an adversary, albeit not before a considerable amount of damage.
She was a nightmare, as was her husband.
Poor kids didn’t stand a chance with them for parents.
Research within the adult homeless population significantly correlates at least 1 Adverse Childhood Experience (ACE) with 30% mental illness and 50% substance abuse. More than one ACE is associated with at least 5 of the top 10 leading causes of early death in the US. Unfortunately, people are drawn to what they learned in childhood because it is familiar to them. That does not make both parties' behavior in relationship with each other equally bad. Had their father managed to make a new life for himself and his children, he may have sought help for his alcoholism to accommodate a new way of life. We will never know for sure. On the other hand, there was no evidence to suggest positive change on the part of their mother. Murder, especially in terms of an attempted family annihilation, should have been an unthinkable option. Sometimes the scales of justice tip one way and not the other because of such one-sided egregious acts.
Oh fuxk you. Don't put them on the same level. 😂 You are crazy
its so strange how ppl rush to blame the man in these situations. no one does this when the genders are reversed.
It is most likely the result of the conflation (i.e., the merging of two or more sets of information, texts, ideas, etc. into one). For example, the conflation of social Darwinism and the eugenics movement, in what is now perceived as identity politics, during WWII's Jewish Holocaust, demonized one side to justify the total extermination of others through genocide. If overpopulation is your greatest fear, disrupting biological reproduction is a way to lower total fertility rates by country to zero.
I wish people would put down the booze. I believe it's the biggest (optional) cause of mental health and family issues in Western culture.
Alcool consumption is not the cause of mental health problems , it's the consequence
And other cultures too! But I agree
The husband seemed weird anyway.
Creepy. I’m Korean and she reminds me of my own mother. Well except the murder part but the unrepentant narcissistic tiger mom rings true.
She a psycho but who ends their marriage by email? That’s another kind of psycho. Those poor kids.
Both parents were very narcissistic and emotionally absuvie to their children, honestly. This was a disaster waiting to happen!
Yeah, he was cold-blooded for that.
Just made the same comment. He should have made sure his daughters were safe first. Preferably by being present for this.
@@bunberrier
everybody, i mean everybody, even most low intelligence person, is wiser after the event. i myself should have done many things differently in hindsight.
And who would be happy being told that your daughters would be raised by the new girlfriend??
I'll be honest when I first heard that John initiated divorce via email and included that he had a new boo, I wondered what kind of absolute jerk he was. After hearing about the relationship...I appreciate his position, but I still find it a jerk (and stupid) move.
Both parents unstable! Poor girls 😢 they'd no chance,i wish them well
I hope the sisters stayed close to each other.
This man John was a kind of geek. He was certainly smart about technical stuffs but merely an idiot regarding life and human relationships .
Obviously he couldn’t understand that the woman he invited to his life was 10 levels lower than him.
The Children were Very Smart!
Thank you for creating a video on Super Bowl Sunday.... I expected the whole country to stop for this day but you pulled through :)
I really believe that a regular flawed human can't grasp the degree of hate that a malignant narcissist carries. It is beyond comprehension. That being said, John should have known better than to declare his intention to her. He knew what he was dealing with. Why gamble with your life just to make a point? The girls are the bravest, most fearless, most strong young women I've ever seen, and I hope a little pride for this, and rock solid self trust will always temper their grief. I hope their lives are full of safety, healing, and love going forward. Won't be easy, but if anyone can do that, they can.
The husband shares the blame. You don't tell your spouse that 1.) You have a lover, 2.) You want a divorce, and 3.) I plan to take our kids--to another country--and make my new chick their mother. That's not just disgustingly callous, disrespectful and cowardly, it's stupid. This could potentially set anyone off, let alone someone you already know to be selfish and violent. HE set things in motion. Maybe she'd have done it no matter what but she definitely didn't need the gigantic helping hand he gave her. Furthermore, why didn't he leave long before when she first started abusing him and more importantly abusing the girls? Why did he wait until he had a replacement wife and mother? Pathetic.
Poor girls had two irresponsible, self-centered shallow parents.
they were married for about 19 years - he should have know who she was
do you blame Nicole Brown Simpson as well? You victim blamers are sick.
That woman was a monster
I LOVE Dr. Grande !! He ALWAYS hits the nail on the head. He knows EXACTLY what he is talking about ! I wish he had a Practice in my city.
Between seeing what my parents went through when I was growing up and stories like these, I’ll never get married, and I probably won’t be having children either. Too much risk of somebody waking up and deciding it’s time to destroy you on some random Wednesday.
Yup
I thought I was the only one who felt this way
Same, no marriage, no kids, I don't even want a live together relationship.
AMEN!
@@user-xj5xp6qz5g I’m not sure about that but I bet someone has walked in oncoming traffic because of a divorce
If you are lucky the narcissist is to much a coward to go to jail.
Dr Grande IS the Super Bowl
Hi Dr Grande,
My Dad always to me, anyone who shoots someone from behind is a coward.
As always I learn something new from your videos.
Narcissistic mothers can be even worse than such fathers. And in this case, the poor girls also had a father that was - despite being intelligent and hard working - emotionally clueless... and just as disengaged from reality as his wife. The girls survived despite their parents and thanx to their own wits and awareness. They deserved to be alive, I hope they make the best of it. God bless them!
If I were her children and her husbands family I would be looking to hold law enforcement accountable for not charging this woman with domestic abuse the many opportunities they had to do so. Why are some women so easily given a pass by LE when it is entirely clear that they are the aggressor?? This needs to change. Just maybe if someone in power had held her responsible for her violent behaviour those girls would be enjoying their teenage years with their loving father.
my thoughts exactly when the cops realized he was the victim and not her... and then they just left without doing anything, what a horrible sexist double standard. Anyone can be a victim of domestic abuse.
Doesn't matter. They still treat it like a joke in court. Even when their boot print is on your body...
No complaining witness and no acts occurring in their presence rich people don't get arrested for shite like that
It was a he said/she said situation. John chose to not press charges; he might not have wanted to disrupt his family. Male victims of domestic violence often fear being branded as cowards. And after she got out of jail, there would be the likelihood she would seek retribution.
You nailed her perfectly with your analysis. She obviously was a tyrannical monster mother, a rare breed. I feel very sorry for the rest of the family. Rest in peace for the father.
My mom still tries to get me to date. She says, Oh I met a nice guy who you should meet. I say, Mom - marriage and pregnancy, they’re killers.
Those poor girls, their dad doesn't seem like much of a prize, but what an absolute psycho their mother was. How horrible that no one ever stood up for them while their 'mother' continued to abuse them. I hope they were able to support each other and give each other strength as they grew up.
Thank you Doctor Grande, from a New Jersey girl transplanted to Las Vegas. I will wave you from the Super Bowl. Now, to amaze myself with your chilling tale.
Wonder who Dr. Grande is rooting for 🧐🤔
@elizabethhamm5320 I'm guessing Kansas City, Just a theory, my opinion!
Wow. How do you get over your mother trying to shoot you?
You don't. Two decades later, they are still in psychotherapy.
Both were cruel.
Interesting to see the pathological behaviors as well as the East Asian cultural norms the mother encapsulated. Half her behaviors made sense in a Tiger Mom regard. There are very blurry boundaries in Chinese families that reflect dysfunction.
" I ran into a paring knife that my wife was holding with my face--John, explaining a cut on his cheek
I can't believe she Murdered her Family!! My God! No Heart at all! And chasing her Daughter??!!!
Seems you didn’t watch the video.
She did murder her husband and tried really hard to kill her daughters, until the police intervened. She was a wannabe family annihilator.
My Cousin had a Dominating Girlfriend and she even tried moving in my late Granny's home without asking while we're both supposed to care for our Granny who was declining from Dementia.
I know someone who did something similar. Protected and saved his son. But killed his wife and her daughters. One lived.
Thank you
This one hit hard.
Sungnam can mean “Anger” in Korean which is chilling coincidence
When Dr. Grande mentions your hometown 😮
Seoul, Korea?
...and you think your worst fear is about to come true... to be the subject of a Dr. Grande video!!
John telling his wife via email that he had a mistress, wanted a divorce, and wanted to take his daughters away was a fatal mistake. It also put his daughters in extreme danger.
Those poor children...😞
My goodness. I can't imagine growing up in that awful environment.
Bravo John. Getting bold when you find a lover, not when you should protect your children
So was it bold or cowardly? Can't decide which way but man clearly bad as always, lmao.
Dang she was a TERRIBLE shot
My ex is like this… she believes the law doesn’t count with her conduct toward family members.
Now I understand why John emailed! She was a Very Frightening person!
That only emboldened her to carry out her evil plan more.
It was stupid of him to email
@@siobhoncHe didn't think things out. His frequent traveling would have made it difficult to develop and carry out an escape plan. He may not have even consulted an attorney when he sent the email. He didn't imagine that, faced with losing everything she had built her world around, she would resort to murder.
I enjoy your take on these cases. Sad thing is even as productive as you are you’re never gonna run out of crazy terrible content. 😢
Thank you Dr. G for consistently bringing us daily videos. We greatly appreciate the work you put in to every episode!
Best Wishes
How did this man pick this woman for marriage?
He wasn’t attractive, so he decided to shop around outside of his country. Obviously.
@@alexeysamokhin9629what a surprise he got!
Dr. Grande at his best. Thankyou for this detailed explanation of narcissitic-to-psychopathic characteristics.
Hopefully the young ladies will continue to grow into adulthood with the best outlook possible. They may already be more attentive than many of their age, to the possibility of people being manipulative. Wishing them well.
He emailed her about a new love, and Divorce?? How Heartless! Not man enough to say it face to face,! And about the Children, too! Cruel!
I hope you are sarcastic. The woman was outright scary, he was obviously terrified of her. She was a malignant narcissist and those people are very hard to confront face to face. They are very adept in gaslighting and making you feel like you are the villain. And when they feel they are losing their grip on you they become very vindictive. There is also a chance he was drunk when he sent that email.
This is the most unhinged takeaway you could possibly have. She MURDERED him and you're calling him a coward. I wonder if you'd have the same feeling if the roles were reversed. Either way it doesn't matter because not only is it shocking that this was your main takeaway but that 7 people have as low as an IQ as this comment and liked it. May God have mercy on their souls lol
The email was a bad move. It just fueled her rage and gave her time to plan the crimes
@@ky7299Is that why he came back and was living in the same home after he sent that email from China? John was spineless, and that embarrassing ending to their marriage no doubt made her more erratic than she already was.
@@texasrefugee7888 but then he came back and lived with her over the Christmas holiday. I can't tell who is the bigger psycho.
"Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm a schizophrenic... and so am 'I" 😂😬
Ego that woman had bigger than a planet Earth itself😮
Wow, how the hell did John decide he wanted to marry this woman?
Why wasn’t she arrested for her violent actions? And don’t send your master plan to the enemy John.