10 THINGS ALL GAYS DO BEFORE COMING OUT

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 12 พ.ค. 2024
  • Counting down the top 10 things all gay guys do before they come out of the closet. How many did you do?
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ความคิดเห็น • 603

  • @StanChris
    @StanChris  3 ปีที่แล้ว +110

    how many did you do 👀

    • @indianman2140
      @indianman2140 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      StanChris hey can you react to Dennis asmr bf role play?

    • @g9713
      @g9713 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      StanChris pls react to Dennis asmr boy friend role play please please

    • @pcmasterrace3596
      @pcmasterrace3596 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      React to Dennis boy friend role play asmr

    • @jesusshedhisblood.2390
      @jesusshedhisblood.2390 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      React to Dennis asmr bf role play I want to see your reaction

    • @yourlocalgay1452
      @yourlocalgay1452 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      All but the changing voice thing

  • @TheLordPranamya
    @TheLordPranamya 3 ปีที่แล้ว +135

    I just searched "gay" and found this guy and it's literally the best decision I've ever made-

    • @notyourtiger
      @notyourtiger 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Same here lol I just found him

    • @sam_9228
      @sam_9228 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Same... I'm still in the closet lmao

    • @Annoy_mouse
      @Annoy_mouse 24 วันที่ผ่านมา

      ​@@sam_9228same

    • @Annoy_mouse
      @Annoy_mouse 9 วันที่ผ่านมา

      ​@@sam_9228same

  • @greggtilghman6349
    @greggtilghman6349 2 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    I'm 57, there was no coming out when I was a teen/post teen. You walked down the mall, passed a guy you were interested in, you turn back and look, if he is turning back and looking, approach him! That and the prolonged gaze, straight men are uncomfortable with a prolonged gayze.

  • @joey5952
    @joey5952 3 ปีที่แล้ว +135

    When hanging out with my group of guy friends I’d go along with talking about girls but it never EVER felt right 😂😂

    • @this_guy5903
      @this_guy5903 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Me literally everyday

    • @chrisfoxevententertainment7689
      @chrisfoxevententertainment7689 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@this_guy5903 everyday with my co-workers and friends too.

    • @anthonyterrellgarcia9231
      @anthonyterrellgarcia9231 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Joe C Like half of my friends are girl but I’m only attracted to men so imma be around them more but hopefully my friends that are girls don’t get sus 🏳️‍🌈

    • @kimkk2981
      @kimkk2981 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Same 🤣🤣🤣

    • @AdamBalery_AHB
      @AdamBalery_AHB 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      or when ur surrounded by hot friends and have a crush on one of em but u have to handle it inside u😒

  • @Bill_Russell_aka_Coolbreeze
    @Bill_Russell_aka_Coolbreeze 3 ปีที่แล้ว +206

    Nope! Generation gap alert! lol In my time there was no "coming out". No exaggeration but I'd most likely not have made it to 21 had anyone even suspected. Most likely would have been beat to death. I actually envy your generation who never had to experience that and get to grow up with a sense of acceptance and normalcy. It's a great thing and a testament as to how far we've come.

    • @jaydenfoster7321
      @jaydenfoster7321 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      My gay hero was my uncle. Sadly he passed away January 7th 2020. He was 61 (diabetes). I loved to hear his stories about growing up gay in the 60's & 70's in Meadow Grove Nebraska. Fortunately my grandparents were 50 years ahead of their time. They told him he was going to have a rough life but they would always support him. He said in 1974 he gained a black brother in law. And soon after mixed nieces and nephews. He told me about being chased from a few jobs for being gay. About being afraid to go to the gay bars in Houston because gay bashing was a thing. How he was even shamed by other gay people because his life partner was his first cousin. But he did have an amazing life otherwise 😊

    • @nerdyguy2599
      @nerdyguy2599 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@jaydenfoster7321 ayy im in htown and yeah i heard alots of stories from some neighbors of mine about stuff like that

    • @jaydenfoster7321
      @jaydenfoster7321 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@nerdyguy2599 Are you native or an implant like me?
      GO STROS 😷

    • @nerdyguy2599
      @nerdyguy2599 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@jaydenfoster7321 well implant 😂😂 i was born in chicago my fam brought me here when i was around 3 months old and then we moved to a small town still near houston tho

    • @jaydenfoster7321
      @jaydenfoster7321 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@nerdyguy2599 WOW. My Uncle was born in Cook County hospital. Chicago lol What town near here?
      Instagram? I'm "my_giggle_pics" there.

  • @itsame4373
    @itsame4373 3 ปีที่แล้ว +110

    Sadly another one would be self hate. It’s a tough thing that I think a majority go through. Thanks for your positivity Chris! You the best.😁👍🏻

    • @IH8COMERCIALRNB
      @IH8COMERCIALRNB 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Yeah, for a little bit. For a long time I wished I was straight, and at some point, I wondered if being female would be easier, although I never actually wanted to be female because I FELT female..

    • @briandufty5081
      @briandufty5081 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      A hanging out. Or hanging in the closest. Y..

    • @PinkbubblegumPop
      @PinkbubblegumPop 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Is'nt he? ❤️

    • @matthewjay660
      @matthewjay660 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yeah. Heard. I did your #11. ⬆️ It took me 36 long years to finally stop fighting and accept myself and Come Out. 🏳️‍🌈

    • @oculusanji24fe48
      @oculusanji24fe48 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You know I hear a podcast and the guy said " if you could choose to be straight would you " and that left me thinking, becusse I said yes at first. But the more I thought I realize being gay has become a part of me , I experience tons of fun things becusse I explore with guys , I become great firends with my sister over being gay and being more open with her. So no I wouldn't change who I am now for the world

  • @PatrickArgentina
    @PatrickArgentina 3 ปีที่แล้ว +52

    I counted 5 in total : questioning my sexuality + thinking it was a phase + hoping no one suspects I'm gay (these three when I was a teenager) , watching coming out videos (still do it from time to time) , being scared of how my family would react (still), ... Number #11 for me, I would say: constantly thinking of how much better my life would be if I was out (that's a bit sad lol sorry for the honesty)

    • @zacharydalton4699
      @zacharydalton4699 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I understand that last part all to well. I think about that a lot

    • @anthonyterrellgarcia9231
      @anthonyterrellgarcia9231 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Almost Exactly The Same For Me

    • @johnphillips7144
      @johnphillips7144 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Hmm, coming out? I never felt the urge to ''come out to my family'' I decided to let them come to their own conclusions. I mean, they never came out to me about being heterosexual. If they don't know by now they're idiots.

    • @PatrickArgentina
      @PatrickArgentina 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      John Phillips I like your philosophy!

    • @somedude3548
      @somedude3548 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Not out yet but number 11 for sure. I think about this a lot before going to sleep tbh. Yes it’s sad but it’s true.

  • @stevebrown8368
    @stevebrown8368 3 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    I'm an older guy man, happily married and this took me way back. Did most, except the computer stuff for obvious reasons
    Lol

  • @trevormf
    @trevormf 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    Regarding number 6, I certainly did this in the past. And, while it might be fun to have some sort of secret code, and in some places it could be necessary, I think it’s important to just be out and proud in a visible way, one, so that it becomes more normalized, and two, so that closeted individuals can see an example of someone living their truth and know that it’s ok. Besides, I love seeing people out in public just being themselves. It makes life more diverse and interesting. What’s fun about everybody trying to fly under the radar and be heteronormative?

    • @PinkbubblegumPop
      @PinkbubblegumPop 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I wish that was possible everywhere but actually it's getting polarized...the gap between the conservative / ultra religious & the liberals is just jaw dropping. Just take a look at this week's Taliban controlled Afganistan & Hungary & Russia in the past year not to mention Africa & all the middle & far east. Basically all of the spots of acceptance worldwide right now are post Anglo Saxon / Brit / french / German descendants & even there conservatism is gaining hold. It's not even just about religion it's about they way you are conditioned to think growing up. even completely ultra secular post communist countries are homophobic mostly & it's got to do more with that toxic masculinity vibe where 'Men are Men & females are props' well, at least that's how I perceive things. Am I right? anyone? 🤍🏳️‍🌈🇱🇺🇮🇱#CorkyCarla (Demisexual Biromantic Post feminist & straight) ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

    • @qweku_nas2824
      @qweku_nas2824 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Cute

  • @landrybeck
    @landrybeck 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Chris, I'm 38. The more of you that I watch, the more I realize that you're my hero. Honest to God, you speak to me like no other gay dude does. ILY. I'm so happy that you came into your own a decade or so later than I did. I remember being so suicidal and miserable. It wasn't until 23, that I was able to confidently start coming out to friends. I wish I had your balls when I was younger. I missed out on so much. Fortunately, you don't have to.

  • @BiteBolt_77
    @BiteBolt_77 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I came out to my Parents and sister today and today is my birthday. Got the conference from you StanChris

    • @StanChris
      @StanChris  3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      congrats! hope it went well, happy late bday 🎂 🎊

    • @BiteBolt_77
      @BiteBolt_77 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@StanChris It did went well only positive reactions. It helps that i'm from the Netherlands so most people are quite liberal

    • @franciscopagan3255
      @franciscopagan3255 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@BiteBolt_77 you are brave! God bless you!

    • @PinkbubblegumPop
      @PinkbubblegumPop 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@BiteBolt_77 Een grooooote gigantisch knufel van een oudere zus kind 🤍🏳️‍🌈🇮🇱🇱🇺❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • @yourlocalgay1452
    @yourlocalgay1452 3 ปีที่แล้ว +76

    11. watched glee more the 1 time for the gay characters

    • @galvansaucedobruno2793
      @galvansaucedobruno2793 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      i haven't saw glee in my life

    • @yourlocalgay1452
      @yourlocalgay1452 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@galvansaucedobruno2793 whaat, well its amazinggg it has a ot of gay people and they cover alot of songs (700+)

    • @galvansaucedobruno2793
      @galvansaucedobruno2793 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@yourlocalgay1452 Ok I will see it

    • @yourlocalgay1452
      @yourlocalgay1452 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@galvansaucedobruno2793 thats greatt

    •  3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@yourlocalgay1452 I never did, not once. But I'd like to say you sound like a very sweet guy.

  • @eugene.brucebell8108
    @eugene.brucebell8108 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Another great video Chris. I love how you are trying to help closeted gays to come out to their family, friends and then the world.

  • @ivanz4377
    @ivanz4377 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Ive done all 10, but the denial phase was similar 😂. Another thing ive done is going from being on the verge of coming out to planning on faking my life for another couple years 💀

  • @brucemunn146
    @brucemunn146 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I love this video ! I came out of the closet in November 1992 because someone like you inspired me ! Thank you StanChris !!!

  • @eschnitger
    @eschnitger 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    I love the nails.
    When I was coming out there were no coming out videos... We just had to wing it...LOL

  • @stevenwilson4324
    @stevenwilson4324 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Enjoy your vids. Back before we had youtube vids or even online shopping, we had to go to actual book stores to find "coming out" books. That is if you even lived near a larger city that had a "gay" book store. Glad times are changing.

  • @chrismoreau9983
    @chrismoreau9983 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Chris I do enjoy your vids....but as an older gay ....most of those (internet related) wasn't around when I came out in 1988 .... but could very much relate to getting out of the small (550 pop.) town I was in
    keep up the good work 👏

  • @agstafford1
    @agstafford1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I am 60 and so it was a bit different than today coming to grips with my sexuality. I do remember always being attracted to boys. As for celebrity crush, David Cassidy. When the Partridge Family first came on television I was in the 5th grade and rode the school bus in southern Wisconsin, the windows would fog up and I remember writing "I love David Cassidy" in a heart shape on the window. In my teens I became very spiritual/religious to try to deny being gay to myself.Finaly when I was 22 I had followed my family to Phoenix from the Grand Traverse Bay area of Michigan. I found my first gay bars and community and accepted myself in December of 1982 and came out to my sister on new years Eve day and once I got home on New years day I came out to my mother. My mother's only question that day was, and it was NOT in a mean angry way but out of love and because of my spirituality, if I believed that I could still go to heaven. I said yes. My mother told my dad later that week and his reaction was "so long as he is happy" I was so blessed to have such a loving and accepting family. I wish that ALL lgbtq could have as good of a coming out as I did.

  • @rayali9854
    @rayali9854 ปีที่แล้ว

    I standby this chris.great vid

  • @maxam3930
    @maxam3930 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The number 10
    *i felt that, and i feel it everyday*

  • @frankg5573
    @frankg5573 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Nope didn’t do any of them. We did not have the environment that you guys have now!! We had to take chances on who might be gay because of no internet or cell phone apps. Most of my experiences were from sleepovers or just talking about things that were gay to see how they reacted. I’m so jealous of you guys ... well not jealous but envious of how you guys get to come out nowadays!! But hey keep up the great work and videos you do!! Gives me something to look forward to!! Like your Only Fans page❤️❤️Thanks for all you do!! Love ya ✌🏻❤️😎🏳️‍🌈

  • @xxchainsmokingxx729
    @xxchainsmokingxx729 3 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    That’s funny being a bisexual guy and i’ve been through with almost 6 lol

  • @Triad3Force
    @Triad3Force 3 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    The signal is you lock eyes with them for a little longer than two straight men would. Then look away for a beat and then look back. Usually happens naturally if you both are attracted to each other. Just don't force it like some do and stare without blinking for too long and it gets creepy.

    • @octoberboiy
      @octoberboiy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yessss haha

    • @chrishail5518
      @chrishail5518 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I get intimidated if I do that

    • @bulozengakira8449
      @bulozengakira8449 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Stfu!!! I saw this in a documentary!!! they used it in like the 80/90's n shit in passing on certain streets and if the person would look back theyd kno to find a spot. I guess it started as like a sex thing but now its more

  • @LauderdaleJoeM
    @LauderdaleJoeM 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I did 5 or 6 of these various items at some time, but utimately took the dive into number 10 and relocated to South Florida-Fort Lauderdale & went to gay bars galore & met tons of other 24 yr olds & was Blown away at how gay it was/is. We progressed so fast & I got my 1st couple bf's pretty quickly, or the found me, but I was bold about myself @ the nightclubs because everyone gay had moved here from somewhere. I came here after Chicago & central IL. So I'm living on the beach & parents want to come visit, on way to FL Keys for a business trip. I had to tell them because I lived with my 1st boyfriend at the time since they were going to use my bedroom, so we had to sleep in the living Room & of course I had to tell them ahead of time. So I called them before they got on the plane and told them up front, what to expect. They had to take it well cuz they were gonna stay here. Somewhat awkward, but they'd be leaving after cpl days. Went smooth. My bf & I drove to Duck Key & did dinner w/my parents after the business day. I'd dated girls during college so mom thought I was bi. So coming out over the phone worked for Me! I wonder if any teachers ever noticed me looking at boys?

  • @garygreely7782
    @garygreely7782 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Very good video. I think I went through all of them, I did get beat up by my brother since he thought I was gay and my parents never punished him for it. My parents always suspected and would make comments about certain things. My grandparents always knew but never said anything about it. It was the unspoken topic and they always loved me for me, that is my grandparents. I don't want to go into my parents. Keep up the great work.

  • @thegame248
    @thegame248 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I did #1 #5 (Nick Carter) #6 #8 and #9. Love the Jonnor clip edit.

  • @nickmebep
    @nickmebep 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    love this list, my straight voice has been gathering dust, havent used it since high school. still gonna move to SF one day, gay mecca

  • @kurtwhiteley481
    @kurtwhiteley481 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I did #2, #3 🙄, and #8. but that was it actually xD I've always felt quite confident about myself so I didn't have a lot of issues with hoping no one would know I'm gay, or clearing my history or anything like that.

  • @Amaryllon
    @Amaryllon 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    4 out of 10.
    1.) I didn't actually question my sexuality. I just noticed that other boys started to be interested in girls and figured I was just a late developer, puberty being different for everyone. Until one day I had an epiphany of sorts and knew I was gay, so I pretty much went from "Sexual attraction? What's that, lol" to "I'm gay."
    2.) I came out (at least to one person) when I was 15. TH-cam was just a few years old then and not really on my radar...
    3.) I've never changed my voice or the way I talk. My voice has always been boring...
    4.)No. I have crippling social anxiety. I'm 28 and to this day I've never even had a conversation with someone that wasn't completely platonic...
    5.) I've done that. Obviously :D
    6.) I've done that. But not very long actually. It took like maybe a year between me realising I was gay and telling my friends. The more people I told the less I worried or even cared.
    7.) Nah. When I realised it was pretty definitive :D Everything suddenly made sense.
    8.) Obviously.
    9.) Again, obviously. :D
    10) Nope. Too anxious and too attached to my family for that. I still live only about 20 km from my parents :P

  • @jayduc
    @jayduc 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Yes the list is accurate.. just glad I live in Montreal so in college was out and partying in the village

  • @andrewjackson5805
    @andrewjackson5805 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Raised in the church, dated 1 girl for 2 months, knew at 19 but didn't come out until 63, wanted to tell brother and sister personally, watched TH-cam and called gay hotlines .

  • @siddharth7860
    @siddharth7860 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    No. 2 is like sooo sooo relatable 😂 I even found this video while finding coming out videos😂

    • @m.m.2341
      @m.m.2341 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Young guys have it soo easy :D
      Coming Out videos weren't a thing 15 years ago, but thankfully online dating (via PC, no Apps) already existed.
      I know gays who are in their 60s now, their just must have been REALLY tough.

    • @siddharth7860
      @siddharth7860 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@m.m.2341 Yes yes

  • @LtexprsGaming
    @LtexprsGaming 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Definite my #11 would probably be referring to people im crushing on by a different gender ie thinking of a guy but making it out to be a girl so no one would know

  • @strafrag1
    @strafrag1 ปีที่แล้ว

    Hi Chris and guys. My 1st celebrity crush was when I was 8 years old in the fall of 1961 (yeah, i'm old) . I would watch the TV show Dr. Kildare with actor Richard Chamberlain. My mom and I never missed it. Great video, Chris. Cheers, Peter.

  • @teams3345
    @teams3345 ปีที่แล้ว

    You are so correct in this list. I don’t think I ever changed my voice however. I never had an effeminate voice. Great list.

  • @Tptray
    @Tptray 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Yeah we do most of these things. The computer stuff doesn’t apply to me personally since I’m old. I got really involved in religion for a while. Presumably to atone for the perceived sins of my gayness. Then once I came out, I eventually went to theology school to work on “reforming religion from within” and justifying myself I guess. Anyway, cool video and channel!

    • @PinkbubblegumPop
      @PinkbubblegumPop 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Timotht have you had any succes 'REFORMING RELIGION FROM WITHIN'? What denomination are you? 🤍🏳️‍🌈🇱🇺🇮🇱

  • @jonmcintosh2729
    @jonmcintosh2729 ปีที่แล้ว

    When I was in my 20s the internet wasn't a thing and the only way to hook up was at a gay bar or at the town cruise area. Also bathhouses if you lived in a big city. Still I think I went through 6 or 7 of those in the video. Thank you for posting.

  • @mathwithruben
    @mathwithruben 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    The moment when I realize I've done all the things you said )))
    But I'm not publicly out yet, 2 of my best friends know about it and a bunch of gays obviously )
    #11: Talk about those topics with your friends/family members to get a gist of what they think about that and how they will react )))
    Thank you so much for your videos, love you )

  • @javonphillips3679
    @javonphillips3679 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    Only hanging With girls all day at school :like if you did to 🏳️‍🌈

  • @harukaidou3047
    @harukaidou3047 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I haven't done 2 and 7. And as for the 9..uhh, I'm lazy to clear my history so I always go incognito. 🤣🤣

  • @GAND-OZZ
    @GAND-OZZ ปีที่แล้ว

    Bro. I haven’t come out yet and I was looking through your videos to see if you had a coming out one. I am in my bed, on my iPad, late at night, with headphones in. What the heck

  • @pd4654
    @pd4654 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Loved when you said "scary parts of the south" LOL. Reality is all that is gone, the south is safe, very safe!
    Did all #'s

    • @PinkbubblegumPop
      @PinkbubblegumPop 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      This is soooo wierd it's August 2021 now & you must have wrote this a bit before January 6th Capitol riots & over 4 honourable policemen who commited suicide due to those traumatic events. The mere fact that in 2021 there are close to half of americans who are NIANDRATHAL enough to have chosen EFFFFIN' TRUMP OR TRUMP FAMILY A-G-A-I-N is proof enough to how scared an individual should be even in the not so united UNITED STATES 😢🇱🇺🇮🇱🏳️‍🌈🌎🤔🤍 I'm a grown straight female but an avid supporter of LGBTQ+ & other 'minority' rights & every time I encounter an homophobic he or she are ultra conservative, ultra religious without knowing much of the historical facts about their own faith or how it came about or just extremely close minded and dum & that include aaaalll ethnicitys & sectors ❤️#CorkyCarla

  • @Pope_RemytheRatatouille
    @Pope_RemytheRatatouille 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    5:20 I have an idea, the whistle from the hunger games, the one with the mocking jays

  • @ck85x65
    @ck85x65 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Dated many girls starting in middle school and through high school. Had a lot of sex, with a lot of partners. Not possible for me to come out, for many reasons. Am now (forcibly) retired, and dying of loneliness. For a couple of decades, drank and smoked away my anxiety and emptiness, signed into rehab, now completely sober. Still dying of loneliness. I know I have so much love to give (I’m a cancer, and am an empath) but fortune has dealt me loneliness despite my efforts to find someone. Hope you do better in your life than I have done in mine.

    • @PinkbubblegumPop
      @PinkbubblegumPop 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🏳️‍🌈🇮🇱🇱🇺 Huge hug from meeeeeee Carla Maria 🤍

  • @k2cocky38
    @k2cocky38 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Spot on again Chris

  • @PrinzOtto
    @PrinzOtto 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Young guys pretty much dominate the internet social media. I watch several younger vloggers and I have to admit I especially enjoy your content. But. I came out in the 70s so some items on your list weren’t available to me. I did #4, dated a girl from my job figured it would be a cool cover especially at work. When she started getting sexually aggressive I didn’t know what to do LOL so I ended the relationship real fast. One thing that was on my list and probably not so much on yours because you have access to the Internet was going to a dirty bookstore and buying my first dirty magazine and bringing it home that’s the time I had just graduated from nursing school and I was living with my folks. Another item I would put on my list is going to my first gay bar. I was petrified, I would go to the bar and drive around the parking lot and then just go home scared to death I would run into somebody that would know me. Finally when I worked up the nerve to actually go in I know sooner got past the front door a girl I work with saw me. (Not the one I had dated) She looked at me and laughed and smiled she pointed at me and then she pointed at this floor like you here? So she grabbed me by the arm and took me around and introduce me to some people the most, The most significant of the people that she introduced me to was “Marty” and it made me real comfortable then at work because Marty was the administrator of the nursing home where I worked and suddenly I became one of his favorite employees LOL. As for coming out to my folks, they were super cool. I was getting ready to go to the bar one night and my mom says to m, “where are you going and when are you coming home?” And I looked at her and said “do you really want to have this conversation?” Then she looked at me and says “no I don’t I don’t wanna have this conversation here I don’t wanna have this conversation now.” and she went to her room and I went to the club LOL. But eventually my parents set me down and confronted me in a non-confrontational manner and they were very cool and very accepting . They ended up becoming P flag parents 😀 🏳️‍🌈

  • @kyihsin2917
    @kyihsin2917 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I grew up and came out in the 1980s, so watching TH-cam videos and clearing my history weren't issues for me. I did have a girlfriend when I was 14 for one month, and she broke up with me when it became clear I was not interested, but other than that I never dated girls. And I grew up in a fairly liberal big city, so I didn't long to move away. Most of the other things I did do!
    I do NOT want us to go back to the dark days when we had to use code words that straight people were unaware of (one from the '40s and '50s was "Do you know Dorothy?") We should be moving towards being able to casually mention something that shows we're gay without caring whether straight people know.

  • @Joekeegans
    @Joekeegans 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Omg I did the WWYD thing too late at night!!

  • @Mcflyeon
    @Mcflyeon 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I have come up with three of my own: 11. Admiring a lot of guys (real or fictional), 12. Secretly looking up on hot guy images, 13. Finding some a lot of things hot for guys (that could be 'simple' or 'weird' including taking their shirt off. My celebrity crushes includes Prince William since my childhood and Danny Jones from Mcfly who made me fully realise that I was gay.

  • @stevefreedman470
    @stevefreedman470 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Hi baby...thanks for your video...honey I've seen so many of these videos but I appreciate the list as I had gone through the same thing many years ago...I am a new subscriber...be good and good luck! xx "Mama" Steve😊👍

  • @jpmasters-aus
    @jpmasters-aus 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    For the older generation like me, getting married and staying married for 20 odd years, having kids, from there most of the list applies. There are very few “coming out” videos for older people (and there was no internet when I was your age (and going through your coming out), but most to the 10 still applied. I have made a “Coming Out” video on my other channel.

  • @hamzaabdul4273
    @hamzaabdul4273 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I’m going to tell u I’m bout to do everything in this list😩

  • @labourlawact7826
    @labourlawact7826 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I'm brand new here, subscription added and the bell rung.
    Hi Stanchris. You really don't have to be ashamed of being gay. I really like you, handsome. 😊👋👍

    • @PinkbubblegumPop
      @PinkbubblegumPop 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Chris ❤️ reading aaaalll of the comments religiously is so worth my patience encountering all of the hotties that are hitting on you lol 🤣❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🏳️‍🌈🇮🇱🇱🇺🤍

  • @bgoins12
    @bgoins12 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Wow. I did 9 out of 10. Ten was the only one I didn't do.
    4. Yes, I attempted to date a girl to cover it up, but it failed horribly, especially when I got grossed out about kissing a girl. Blech!
    7. At first I thought it could have been a phase, but I realized that no, I definitely liked guys and had zero interest in girls.
    8. I was terrified at coming out. I didn't come out until last week (August 4th) after hiding it for 15 years.

  • @mcrfan9175
    @mcrfan9175 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Love your nails 🖤

  • @patrickblaney
    @patrickblaney 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I've heard that we haven't had a secret handshake since the 1950s. (I'm not sure where I first heard this. It's not original.)
    There's always the "Clang Clang Clang" gay test, but it's a bit dated. It's a reference to Judy Garland singing "The Trolley Song" in the 1944 movie "Meet Me In St. Louis". As you might know, a slang term for gay men is "friends of Dorothy", a reference to Dorothy Gale, the character played by Judy Garland in "The Wizard of Oz".
    To perform the test, you say "Clang Clang Clang" and look to the other person to respond with "went the trolley". I'm sure this existed before "American Dad" but it was used in an episode of that show as one way to expose gay Republicans in order to keep the party pure.
    The song includes the lyrics
    Clang, clang, clang went the trolley
    Ding, ding, ding went the bell
    Zing, zing, zing went my heart strings
    From the moment I saw him I fell
    I may be gay, but I don't have the Judy Garland gay gene. Of course, "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" 🌈 is a great song, but I don't know the words to every song she recorded.
    Maybe there's a more recent gay anthem that could serve as an updated test? Something by Kylie Minogue, Pink or Troye Sivan?

  • @Matty__Matt
    @Matty__Matt 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    5:06 Same I try that shit all the time like to tell them threw telepathy
    #1, #3, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9 for sure, and finally #10

  • @ryanbunton6987
    @ryanbunton6987 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I can relate to every single one of these😂

  • @ericmatthews3024
    @ericmatthews3024 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    for me i was working in khols. Its like a beam of light that hit me. (i kinda like men) so gathered my friends together and told them i was (bi) Thinking about it more had zero interest with girls. A wk went by and told my friends i was gay. lost some along the way. told mom (she was fine) and little by little. i told a lot of ppl.

  • @speedmole2662
    @speedmole2662 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    5:47 It was the exact same for me

  • @tsimeone
    @tsimeone ปีที่แล้ว

    I came out long long time ago before youtube, and today i dont think would cross my mind to look. i took the easy way out and came out as bi, made it a lot easier. but i see your point

  • @jackdraney1812
    @jackdraney1812 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    8 out of 10
    Also you’re definitely my celebrity crush lol

    • @PinkbubblegumPop
      @PinkbubblegumPop 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      This should have gotten a heart from Chris!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • @wesleysumner2472
    @wesleysumner2472 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Maybe we were the shirt that says I am a freind of dorthy

    • @RobinHood70
      @RobinHood70 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Haven't seen *that* in a while. I wonder how many of the younger generation have ever even heard of it.

    • @nicklasl1749
      @nicklasl1749 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Nicklas L
      I was thinking the same thing. I am 26 and I am well aware of this phrase. But historically it goes back to when it was illegal to be gay and it would be used by a person who would want to go up and ask a complete stranger if they were gay. However for obvious reasons one could bluntly ask that question so they would ask “Are you a friend of Dorothy’s?” It was a way to indiscreetly find out if that complete stranger was also gay, but because it sounded like a random question it allowed the person asking the question to remain safe and under the radar. Yet if the person was also gay then they knew the hidden meaning behind the question and a connection could occur. The reason behind the choice of “Dorothy” was thanks to Judy Garland and her being such a early icon of the gay community. She was both as ally in real life as well as her association with The Wizard of Oz and the song Somewhere Over the Rainbow.

  • @tyler496121
    @tyler496121 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You young guys or so lucky, when I came out there was no internet much less you tube, I was in the Military before dont ask dont tell, but I am glad that it is easier for you guys and that you dont have to put up with the shit we had to put up with or suppress.

  • @nealdillon7812
    @nealdillon7812 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    You know how much you help others

  • @kevinh811
    @kevinh811 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I had a Mark E. Miller crush before I came out. Watched all his videos really quickly after I found his channel.

  • @RobinHood70
    @RobinHood70 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Another one with a generation gap, but I was surprised at how many of these applied. There was no Internet at all when I was coming out, but I'll even sort of give you #2, because you'd usually at least heard stories of how someone else coming out had gone, even if it wasn't on YT. (Hint: usually very poorly...same-age friends were iffy, parents it almost always went badly.)
    My #11: Be "friends" with a guy not because you want to actually be friends, but because he was hot AF, but he never knew that was why, cuz you weren't out.

  • @mikebrady2073
    @mikebrady2073 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    # 1 & 8 are identifiable with me. As for secret Gay communications, “Wink-Wink, know what I mean”, there used to be a secret handshake back when everybody was in the closet. I’m serious, I know it sounds funny, but if you think about about it, many secret societies had a unique handshake or greeting to like fellows. But what really works, besides wearing the obvious Rainbow flag, is what’s called “Gay Speak”; using selective words only knowledgable Gays would know in the course of a harmless two way conversation. Story Time: When I was 23 yrs., I was in traffic court to contest a traffic infraction. Now there were not many people inside the court room and when I walked in I noticed these two hot young guys sitting together, talking in low voices to each other, and I decided I was going to sit down just in front of them and off to one side. While we all waited for court to begin, I was wondering why they were in traffic court, so I decided to eavesdrop upon their conversation. I immediately heard two words in the conversation I recognized only from Gay Culture. They were spoken by the first guy, only the second guy didn’t reply like he understood what the first guy was talking about. I immediately realized, then and there, those two didn’t know each other, had just met, decided to sit down together awaiting the start of court, and the first guy was trying to pickup on the second guy without success. The two words inserted into the somewhat innocent conversation was the name of an exclusive Gay Bar located 25 miles away, The Tinker’s Dam, and the word Fist-Fucker. I thought to myself, this is interesting, just as the Traffic Referee entered the court room and my attentions were refocused.
    My # 11 would be doing research on what Homosexuality was and how it applied to me, as I knew I was different from my friends in a number of ways. In my formidable days from Junior High thru College, looking for books on the subject was practically nonexistent and what I did find, medically speaking, was not encouraging and didn’t apply to me.
    Gay History 101: In 1952 (the year I was born), The American Psychiatric Association listed homosexuality as a mental disorder and the world at large took notice. For the next 21years, there were Gay witch hunts by the police and others, lost jobs, death from beatings, in all forms of society, but clinic and statical research on homosexual subjects slowly but surly didn’t support the mental disorder idea. So, along comes 1973 and The American Psychiatric Association reversed it’s decision. After this fact and for many-many years, “Surprise-Surprise”, the police and general society would resist this new reversal. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homosexuality_and_psychology
    It was then that I knew with absolute certainty that I wasn’t crazy after all (though some may still disagree HA!), because at 21 years of age I exhibited great self confidence and was well respected as someone who excelled in critical thing and reasoning with FACTs. (Something our current president is so lacking). It was then that I came out of the closet and attended my first Wednesday social gathering at Stanford University’s newly formed Gay Peoples Union at Stanford. I was ecstatic, and the rest is history.
    Change of subject: Chris ... would you consider hosting a Vlog with you and your Gay Uncle? I think it might be a TH-cam first and I’m sure he has some great stories to tell

  • @Luna11280
    @Luna11280 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I noticed I wasn't straight in 6th and told my first girlfriend who then became my bestfriend (she was les) and she helped me a lot. I noticed that I wasn't that interested in girls and would usually get "excited" around the guys

  • @blattman13
    @blattman13 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I've used the code phrase "friend of Dorothy" as in over the Rainbow or just say you are Family

  • @mileshill3872
    @mileshill3872 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    1. of course
    2. I would watch Daniel Howells coming out video every night without my parents knowing
    3.I'm trans so I obviously changed my voice to sound deeper, but because I was dysphoric not because I didn't want people finding out I was gay.
    4. I've never dated a girl, but I have tried to make myself a lesbian so I had an explanation for my masculinity
    5. I used to be a girl so I was able to talk about liking boys but when I came out as trans I was super silent about it.
    6. I've come out several times as different identity's so I never had to try to hide it. the first 2 identities yeah, I was scared but now it was just sort of "oh by the way I'm gay" also my suggestion is saying "are you a friend of Dorthy?" it's an old saying and we need to bring it back
    7. I've definitely been like wow that girls pretty...OMG, MAYBE I'M NOT GAY! and just have a sixth identity crisis. but I just deal with it.
    8. obviously, even though my parents would say to my face! "if you are gay or trans or whatever, WE. DON'T. CARE! we will except you!" and still being petrified to do it.
    9. I mean...I would clear my history of gay sex ed video's and asexual education because I'm on the ace spectrum...but...the last one's pretty self-explanatory.
    10. my friends and I are moving to a cottage by the beach with a treehouse so...
    11. I feel like everyone in the closet has cried while listening to troye sivan

  • @Vandyboygames
    @Vandyboygames 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I did literally everything on this list I relate so much to number 10

  • @Aminuddin-se6ef
    @Aminuddin-se6ef 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    We don't mind what others say or think about our relationship as long as we love each other so much.. this 31st Dec will be our 9th Anniversary together!
    ❤🧡💛👬💚💙💜

  • @LenHealsU
    @LenHealsU 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Great video and so right on! Signals won't work for long. I'm much older than you, and when I was in high school back in the 1960s (in Philadelphia) it was known (signal) that Gay boys wore red and black on Wednesdays and Gay girls wore yellow and green on Thursdays. The only problem is that I found out about that from my STRAIGHT friends. So, there you go.

    • @PinkbubblegumPop
      @PinkbubblegumPop 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @scott7349
    @scott7349 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    You are very funny. Doing a fantastic job. Being gay is a gift.

  • @jamesbunch8932
    @jamesbunch8932 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Love it. It feels like a gay Family Feud question...

  • @bluemoonsy
    @bluemoonsy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    A signal? I think the combo of the painted finger nails and dual earrings are a bit of a clue. lol

  • @joephomer
    @joephomer 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Sameeeee! Mark E Miller 👌👌👌

  • @Tcowancowan
    @Tcowancowan 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I snapped when he said Mark E fucking Miller 😂😜😍 sammmeee!!!!!

  • @nealdillon7812
    @nealdillon7812 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I was so badly depressed it was as if my head were frozen and it was gradually thawing.
    I avoided people and was ashamed. I needed professional help.

  • @JrBurriss
    @JrBurriss 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Cool vid. #1 didn't question my sexuality until I was 17. #2 I'm going to tell my age with this one.... TH-cam didn't exist, I had to go the library and research what I was going through. #3 I unconsciously would change my voice with my straight friends if we were in public. Especially if we ran into any of their friends. #4 I dated many girls, but always stared at guys. I even had girls that have literally fist fought over me. [not proud of that]. #5 I had high school crushes, not really celebs. #6 I tried so hard hide my sexuality after graduating high school. That didn't work out to well....LOL. #7 Can't relate. #8 Extremely scared coming out, people have no idea how scary it is. #9 & #10 Never had to. Just my 1 cent

  • @jacharvey8231
    @jacharvey8231 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Only thing that happened to me was I got found out and outed to my whole year group. Fun times...

  • @micahwhitmer6578
    @micahwhitmer6578 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I would look into gay history there was so many signals that they used back in the 80’s and 90’s and example would be the handkerchief colors and each color was possible a signal etc.

  • @dantheman192
    @dantheman192 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    just get a short back and sides for ur hair. it always looks the best on anyone

  • @DarkHillsHound
    @DarkHillsHound ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Only questioned my sexuality for the last 18 years, every single time i had a crush on a guy from the age of 13 forward and every time i watched the 1995 Pride and Prejudice with Colin Firth as Mr. Darcy (my celebrity crush). Definitely in denial up until i came out to my sister this month. I guess it's better to admit to liking men at 31 than to never admit it.

  • @merfiron9250
    @merfiron9250 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    As a tiny bit of context, the first time that I ever came out was a few months into my freshman year of college. Before then, I was scared of even coming out on some obscure minecraft server in fear that someone I knew was also on there and would somehow trace me back to my IRL self. So ya, I was hella closeted lol.
    #1 Definitely did this more as a kid when I thought it was just a phase. By senior year of high school though, this wasn't a thing anymore.
    #2 I actually didn't even start watching any of these until a few weeks ago lol. They're amazing and I wish I found them sooner.
    #3 I never really had to deal with this. I mean, I hate my voice, but that's just cuz it sounds so stereotypically Asian lol. But ya this was never a thing for me.
    #4 Oh, ya, mhmm. I actually had a straight friend ask me for dating advice cuz they though I was actually in a relationship with a girl and that I knew my way around them. They still don't know I'm gay lol.
    #5 I didn't have a gay celeb crush cuz that's too smart for me. Nah, it was Tom Holland all the way. Also Von Smith tho I can't remember if that was before or after coming out and he's not much of a celeb anyway.
    #6 Um, ya? Also yes get us a signal pls. I just quietly sing Village by Wrabel or something by Girl in Red and hope that someone picks up on it. Still no results, tho.
    #7 Yep. I thought that by the time I got into middle school I'd be mature enough to be over it. And when that didn't work I thought I'd be over it by high school. Shoot, guess not, but definitely by senior year of high school. And now here I am still gay and hella proud lol.
    #8 Ugh straight people have it so easy cuz they never have to deal with this. You feel like it's the most earth-shattering thing to come out to someone when you haven't done it before. But then now that I am out, I sometimes forget that it's even still a big deal to some people.
    #9 Growing up, I kept track of every single history tracker on my computer so I could get rid of them all. But even today, I still clear my youtube history cuz that's hella obvious and could be seen in public. And I don't exactly want people seeing my bottoming routine now do I???
    #10 I just wanted to move out of my house to be somewhere more accepting. I hated having to pretend all day long for years on end.

    • @oculusanji24fe48
      @oculusanji24fe48 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      That you so much for sharing wow, I agree so hard on the last one. I hate pretending, I work in a place where everybody is pretty religious. I have to act " manly " around them. Pretend I'm tuff but in reailty I'll cry to anything and act very flamboyant.

  • @shaymininfernape7088
    @shaymininfernape7088 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    11. I remember in highschool when I sat next to a cute boy who I thought could be gay or bi I would roll up sleeves to show skin XD

  • @leonmichael3322
    @leonmichael3322 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I was never in the closet, from my culture being gay is embraced. Cool video, keep them coming

    • @PinkbubblegumPop
      @PinkbubblegumPop 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      WHAT CULTURE IS THAAAAAAAAT????? 🏳️‍🌈🇱🇺🇮🇱🤍

    • @leonmichael3322
      @leonmichael3322 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@PinkbubblegumPop Native American

    • @PinkbubblegumPop
      @PinkbubblegumPop 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@leonmichael3322 Oh thought as much ❤️ or other pacific cultures ❤️ Can you IMAGIN what humanity would look like nowdays if Native American tribes were'nt almost extinct 😣😓😥 & the ruling ethnicity? We would'nt even had to have come up with the 'Pride movement' 🏳️‍🌈 in counterfeit to monotheistic religions & other toxic masculinity' mentality'. I mean nothing's perfect inside that culture iether but the spiritual aspect of it is what makes me so of awe of it 🤍
      In kabbalistic jewish terms, someone who is attracted mainly to the opposite sex is considered to have a soul of the opposite sex reincarnated within them 🇮🇱 (Only very few scholars deal with the hidden secret language of the 'Zohar' & Sefer Yetsirah') I don't know what Buddhism & other far east faiths but I allways viewed them as slightly less homophobic ❤️

  • @michaeldent3048
    @michaeldent3048 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I remember when I came out to my parents I was scared to death and my parents were like oh we kinda figured that out a long time ago turns out I was the last to know lol

  • @valorclymer6294
    @valorclymer6294 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    It is needless to say that I've done every single one of those!

  • @erebus1005
    @erebus1005 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Okay let's see those 10 things. I actually want to know if i am doing some😅

  • @howardbaker1620
    @howardbaker1620 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I grew up in San Francisco so there was no need to move away. However, in the 1960's SF BAY AREA was no panacea either. As to the "in the closet" thought process I have to admit your interests never strayed much beyond your group of friends. And, the realization of any gay activity was curtailed because of the detrimental outcomes most likely to visit you!! I remember my one high school experience was as furtive as it was transitory, a one and done experience. Never revealed or recognized by my "former" friend. After the advent of computers the gay world opened up and a multi-colored world revealed itself. Unfortunately, baby boomers were not the main beneficiaries, we were the building blocks for today's gay enlightenment. Glad it has dawned and personal development has grown.

  • @alexandrelourenco5234
    @alexandrelourenco5234 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I did 8 lol I think the #11 would be saying you are bi first, before coming out as gay, I think we imagine it will be easier for people to accept (also it's part of the denial phase hahaha)

  • @RamRammyRam
    @RamRammyRam 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Lol, did all of them 🤣 And I can even pass as straight

  • @dailydoseofdumbstuff6312
    @dailydoseofdumbstuff6312 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Secret code would be a very scary but sweet face LOL

  • @dynamite4203
    @dynamite4203 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I'm gay and my friend (which I think is straight) doesn't know and I don't have the courage to tell him I'm gay but this video (and a few others) is helping me do that!I also have a crush on him 😅

  • @dyrek7122
    @dyrek7122 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I definitely moved out of my small town to Atlanta. I did it mostly for my job but also because I was tired of living in the 1800s.

    • @PinkbubblegumPop
      @PinkbubblegumPop 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • @lucasl8689
    @lucasl8689 ปีที่แล้ว

    Well, I've got 8 for sure, with a plus 1.
    *#1, #2* (probably why this channel was suggested), *#5* (I had a few before I realized they were celebrity crushes, like Ross Lynch and Callum Worthy. There were really quite a few, especially when I was younger. My first "yeah, that's a crush" moment was Tom Holland. Also Benj- George Sear.), *#6, #7* (oops, it wasn't a phase), *#8* (similar to #6), *#9* (pretty sure everyone should do this, but I definitely clear "certain terms"), *#10* (also just getting space from overbearing parents even though I've been an adult for a little while now).
    Not exactly the same as #3, but I definitely changed my _laugh_, which apparently raised some eyebrows for being too giggly.

  • @jarrellquincy1141
    @jarrellquincy1141 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Love the leaf village hat