I see a lot of comments that suggest the reason is that many Japanese people are exhausted due to their work culture. However, if you look into it, while Japanese workers work hard, the hours they work rank fairly low, according to Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development. The average yearly hours for Japanese workers have dropped from 2243 in 1970 to 1607 in 2022. Compare that to Columbia where the average worker works 2405 hours annually. In the US, we work an average of 1810 hours. The US comes in at number 13 on the list, and Japan at 31. Columbia and Mexico are number 1 and 2, respectively. Of course, these are averages, so each country will have people who put in a lot more and a lot fewer hours than the average.
I'm in IT and the few Japanese I've known (men and women) work in the office, then they go back home and start working again until they go to sleep. So the "official" hours they work look normal, but the real hours are 50% higher on average. Also, all those extra hours, since they are unofficial, are unpaid.
@@Johnny_Savage I'm certain that some do leave the office, only to go home and continue their work. There are people all over the world that do the same. However, the vast majority of workers, even in Japan, do not have jobs that they are able to do from home. Auto mechanics, cashiers, nuclear power plant technicians, and so on can't continue to work from their living room. Folks in those kinds of jobs probably work some unpaid overtime, but while illegal, is common. Also, the numbers I mentioned are average hours, so you could have two people who work 20 hours a week and one working 60 hours. That makes their average work week a little over 33 hours. It's a bit misleading because if you look at the details, 1/3 of those workers are being overworked while 2/3 are well rested. If the Japanese workforce was made up of only office workers, and people working on salary rather than hourly, I'd say your 50% more hours could be correct, but most people do not work those kinds of jobs.
Idk if you've been to, let alone lived in Japan but during my stays I was able to confirm for myself what I've heard about Japan: The work culture is very different compared to the west. Job and private life have no strict separation, overtime work is still the norm, social pressure to partake in after work activities is incredibly high. Especially in big cities the streets are full of salary men till late at night.
@@maiy8786 I agree with some of what you say, but most applies to the salaryman type jobs. They do emphasize boding, which usually means going out and getting drunk at the "request" of their boss. The Japanese work culture is different in many ways, but most of that is due to employee loyalty to the company they work for. The stereotype we have of the Japanese work culture is mostly based on the salaryman culture. A Lawson's employee is off work when their shift is over.
How? No strong spiritual and religious background= no strong desire to have children. Atheism turns into nihilism. Nihilism teaches us that there's no benefit of having kids that can't save us and will die anyway after us. That's why there's never been an atheist society. They naturally die out from lack of reproduction.
@@onemaster8133The blame( accountability really) would be on the men if they start having the ability to get pregnant and give birth 😊. Tiptoeing around the women's feelings won't solve anything.
The marriages are not that often sexless, they are having sex, just not with each other. The prostitution and love hotel scene is..... substantial and normalised.
As it should be. What would you do as a man if after just 6 months your woman stops being interested in doing it? You either divorce/separate or you stay together but look for professional girls.
It's pretty clear from the conversations that the sex referred to was sex IN the marriage, sex outside of the marriage excluded. The question was about sex between the couple, whether they still do it (together) anymore. And the most important part is that those who answered, understood the question this way.
As a European woman married for 12 years and being with my husband for almost 20 years now in total, these opinions seem so wrong to me... There shouldn't be such a thing as too much time together. I mean that's why you get married, because you love your partner enough that you want to share your life with them. Being exhausted and overworked is not only a Japanese phenomenon so it shouldn't be an excuse either. Simply just being with your partner at night, have dinner, chat and relax together, should lift-off your daily burdens. Last but not least, children strengthen the bond when the foundations of the marriage are strong and healthy. Treat each other with respect, focus on communication and don't forget to take care of yourselves. But most importantly, choose your partner wisely. That's the only way a relationship can stand the test of time.
@inconnu4961 utter rubbish! My marriage is over after 28 years, I've done everything for him and got nothing back, im for women's rights and look how I've been treated. Stop blaming women for everything.
@@inconnu4961 If we are to play the blame game, I could say that men seek short-term pleasures and objectify their partners rather than respect them. But marriage should not be about pointing fingers and trying to dominate. It should be about mutual respect and sharing responsibilities. Giving and taking. Anything else is a recipe for failure, imo.
@@daphrodite80 I wouldn't gerneralise that men seek short-term pleasures over long term relationships. I would argue that men in general develop a deeper relationship over time in comparison with woman. Your description of a men should be the stereotype to avoid tbh 😅 I fully agree with the part about marriage tho :)
@@ZelltisExx My comment was in response to the person who said "It's feminism!", which is a generalization. My point was exactly that we shouldn't generalize (because there are plenty stereotypes not only for women but also for men) and we shouldn't blame one another in a relationship in order for it to work.
Listen again to the question and how it's worded. And most importantly, how those who answered understood the question. Most assuredly the question was asking about sex IN the marriage, sex between the couple, sex outside the marriage excluded. And those who answered, understood it this way. Because that was what the question meant.
1. Inadequate amount of work for a small salary, and constant stress. 2. For the past few decades, Japan has been killing pride and courage of Japanese men. And this is result of successful completion of the propaganda campaign. 3. Normalization of adultery. I think so, looking from the outside.
I'm addressing your #1 point. Working your butt off just to stay in place where you already are will destroy you mentally. This is the WEF "You will own nothing and be happy". Except you don't get the happy part. Cogs in the machine for the elites who think everyone else are insects. It destroys caring, and you end up going through the motions. The country side is more or less empty and everyone wants/needs to be in the metro areas. Abandoned property that no one wants (including family) because the family is on the hook for all bills that come with it. Toss in bringing up older structures to current earthquake codes and it can be a deal breaker. Houses in the US are considered assets. Not so much in Japan. Sometimes it's easier to tear the house down and start all over. In the US that usually only happens for high end properties. My cousin did that on Cape Cod in Massachusetts. Bought a place and tore it down and put something bigger on the lot. He wanted the lot. If the government gave incentives for businesses to have operations in more rural areas, people could breathe and there'd be less stress. Office jobs in cube farms do not need to be in high priced real estate. All you need is a fast internet connection. I have a nephew that lives in Leesburg VA. The office is the HUGE defense contractor by Dulles Airport. About 6 miles away. When COVID started everyone worked from home. He still does. He and his wife hate the condo they are in and house prices are ridiculous. They lease the place and during COVID it was on the marker for $450K. Nice place, but not $450K nice. They leased with the possibility that the owner could sell out at the end. He's from North East PA. He and his wife are looking to go back. He might possibly lose out on advancement in the company. But, he doesn't believe so. Still does business trips. Has his gov. security clearance. He might have to do one on ones in the company every couple of months for a few days. That's a 3-4 hour car ride or a 45-60 minute plane ride.
@@r4x2 Now, you’re getting to the core of the issue. Women entering the workforce in greater number and consumerism replacing having a family as a priority
You're probably desensitised thanks to all the p0rn you watched early on in life, Its very much the same with japanese culture. They have some really weired and etreme p0rn. It's desensitised them to s3x, they arent aroused by their spouses any more and s3x industry caters to their weired fetishes.
It's a shame this is happening, I think it's an important part of a close relationship. We have been together 24 years and are 41 and 55 and still have an active sex life. I have family members who were still having sex in their 70's and 80's.
The married couple were such great interviewees. They seemed to have been through the phase and moved past it and were very thoughtful and open about the reasonings for what may cause this as well as how to overcome it. I especially loved the wife's statement at the end.
She is very casual about it and just says whatever comes to mind. But she delivers her arguments with conviction and everything she says makes a lot of sense and seems brutally honest.
one lady said there are more important things then sex , but sex is one of the greatest way to know if your partner still loves you, is attracted to you and in that intimate movement how he tpuches you treats you tells a lot too
also if i got a wife like the married couples , the one with hat i feel, i will have sex with her on daily basis if she allowed me that is , and i want to have 4 kids , 2 we will make and other 2 adopted, 4 kids of our own .
Always a cringe copeout when someone says that too. Actually sex is very important it's one of the key factors that separates a true partnership and not just a business arrangement. A huge red flag that this woman will use sex as motivation or reward for the male or just wants to let herself go physically and not be held accountable.
Japanese men expect a wife to be a wife and mother, so her identity changes after marriage. I watched another interview recently asking men if they thought seeing a prostitute cheating. A majority said no, it was just sex, the women pretty much thought the same way. It's really sad. I can't imagine a life of no sex. how awful.
Me personally, I'd feel relieved not needing to have sex as someone asexual. I just want to cuddle all the time. Kisses, hugs, gentle tickling, ear licking, whispers, massage. All things I want to do and receive.
@@munfmit's heaven country for people that love cheating . Many husband in the world Will jump out of happiness when their wife tell them to go and find P And do it with them
The interesting thing here is thet they "start to see each other as family" which is the whole point but for some reason that stops attraction. The girl at 6:00 answers it best, how intriguing.
as a foreigner married to Japanese I will give you one of the reason. In Japan in most family, kids sleep with their mother. So the usual time at night when you are between wife and husband is gone.
Yup. Over time it just adds to the idea/feeling of ones spouse being “family” and not a romantic partner. For foreigners… knowing is half the battle and the other half is communication. These are issues to be discussed prior to marriage… although many if not most will not. Do you want your wife to work after having children or after they start school or not at all? If the wife is a high income earner are they ok with a stay-at-home husband? Infants in the same bed as adults… is a bit dangerous (although many people in general may do this). Why not a bassinet in the couple’s room? When the child is a toddler, why not again compromise and say once or twice a week they can sleep with mom and dad and the rest they sleep in their own bed? Things are hard enough for couples from the same background to learn to live together and start a family… for international and interracial couples, all of that just significantly increases. … which brings us back to the beginning… communication… and flexibility.
This is complete nonsense excuse. If you want to have sex you’ll easily find a way. To share one bed with the whole family no matter age was common in the Middle Ages in Europe and they had 10+ children
Overworked and underpaid, which means less time for relationships and less money to support a family. Similar situation all over the world. However, I think it's even more severe in countries such as Japan, South Korea, etc.
I hate the excuse “shy.” When some Japanese people use the excuse “shy” it’s usually related to doing something hurtful or not helpful to someone else, like not allowing a foreigner into a restaurant or refusing to date foreigners or in this case, unwilling to have s*x with your partner which is something healthy you’re supposed to do in marriage/relationship. When you refuse s*x to your spouse it means you reject them, which affects them mentally. It’s toxic behavior actually.
@@airgaborpara3824most women aren't interested in sex as much as men so it's understandable why women are avoiding sex. In 3rd world traditional countries women are forced into marriages and sex and guys know Nothing about consent.
I think the main reason is the work. If they are mentally and physicially exhausted, of course nobody wants sex. Then (not only in Japan) its important to take care of your marriage, to do something for it. Keep romantic moments, like leaving the child at kindergarten or, babysitter in order to go to a restaurant with the partner. When travelling, choose hotels which have the option of babysitting. Its important to have sometimes time as a couple. Well, when they are so exhausted from work, probably they are also not so motivated to plan this. But its necessary
Interesting! Japanese men, in general, seem to spend longer hours at work vs Western men. S the time spent together is actually less.Yet many of these people state too much time together. It appears in Japan people take partner to be with and perhaps have children rather than be with a partner they are attracted to sexually and also to build a life with. Many Western couples make a point of having date nights to re-engage the romantic feelings. Japanese culture seems to have evolved accepting prostitutes for sex while married. The urge has not gone away but is shifted to someone other than wife
One of the reasons is they don't see going to a prostitute as cheating. So, there are different and more exciting options other than your spouse without consequence.
This is sad.Up to a couple of months before my darling husband died January 2022 age 74 we were making love nearly every morning . We had amazing times together & I miss him heaps. Am almost 59 now
@@wongkengmun1103her husband was a handsome chad…she wss attracted to him like most women were. Thats why the age gap didn’t matter he was very attractive…
I think it is the insane work culture that separates couples. If you are exhausted, sex is not the first thing in mind. Also, in traditional relationships, the worlds of working husbands and housewives have are very different, so understanding each other's problems and hopes can become overwhelming. In the video it was suggested that sharing a house and seeing each other often and not at their best would kill interest, but I don't see it that way. In my country the vast majority of couples live together before getting married, so you know what you will get. If you only see the future spouse all dressed up, good mood and having time for you, the reality of married life will be a wet rag against your face.
@@Ekam-Sat in Japan they stop working when they have a kid and frankly people have never worked less or been less stressed or in danger in all of history so all of this is just a copout to give a neutral "work bad" answer to take away from the real issue. Wmn acting like mn and wasting the prime years of their lives sleeping around and focusing on their state subsidized "careers"is what's killing it. And as you say if work is so bad then why are they all being told to go be work drones and compete with their own potential husbands in the workforce?
Right on. The Japanese are inundated with societal pressures, and this applies to marriage as well. While the family unit is extremely important, spouses must realize that they are married to each other - not to their children.
@@Aeris_InJapanYou can not. You clearly don't know what you are talking about. The interviewer is very fluent and has a good vocabulary range. I understand almost everything but to he able to speak this fluently is an achievement.
@@Aeris_InJapanYeah I dunno about that even if you’re going to a Japanese language school in Japan full time and diligently studying at home very night. One would be able to carry on a conversation, but being able to speak on complex topics… it’s going to take more than just an intensive year. OTOH, while the interviewer does have good Japanese overall, his accent is foreign. But that’s ok as he is still easily understood. There is also no way it took him half his life to learn Japanese.
There are people for whom learning languages is easy. I know people who are fluent in several languages like English, Chinese mandarian, 😊Russian French, Italian, Spanish and German. They exist.
It is the same reason as everywhere but more severe in Japan: no more real fun together when married. Men have to keep the dating going and create emotions in their wife by being playful + teasing her + having fun activities. but especially in stressed Japan many men dont use the energy they have left for fun instead let their wife be bored at home.
Sounds like they marry the fantasy without actually getting to know the real person. After marriage, one begins to see real life and the other person's real self, which is a hassle: we are not, in fact, fantasy lovers whose only job is to fulfill expectations. So they seek the fantasy outside the relationship, where hosts and hostesses play the role. Ultimately the marriages sound like superficial social institutions, rather than relationships of genuine mutual appreciation and love.
One big reason is married couples live in close quarters with their kids up even thru adulthood. Very common. Often sleeping in the same room or close by.
It's not cheating when the wife does not forfill her duty as a wife and make love with her man. Then it becomes like she is hiring a maid to do the cleaning at home or a chef to cook food for them. Sorry not sorry, feminism is cancer
@@olafian2450 I’ve been here for more than 12 years, and unfortunately more than 50 or 60% of the people (specially women) who you ask, they will say that’s something that will happen at some point, but they don’t mind as long as they don’t know, so yeah, it is generalizing, not everyone thinks like that, but half or more than half of the population
@@laptopstudy3279To deprive someone of something implies they're entitled to it in the first place. Which implies you believe in transactional relationships and not healthy ones.
The more I learn about the Japanese, the more I realize that they seem to be natural born loners. I should know about that, for I am one. Now combine that with the intense politeness (which is indicative to the Japanese culture) when they first meet someone, it is no wonder that after marriage they then see the 'other side' of their partners, and thus, get turned off. Their expectations get ruined. And being too shy about sex is another wrench in the gears. So, in short, the blame could simply be the culture. Change that part of it, and things would likely turn around.
Shyness is a somewhat incorrect term that has become very popular. It's not that they are exactly shy, but rather they are passive and have been educated not to disrespect others. The initiative to do things often goes against that, but initiative is something that causes a lot of sexual attraction at the same time. Most women, in any country, prefer a man who takes the initiative.
@@gordonbgraham for a birth rate of four it is sufficient to have sex four times in your life with a bit of luck. Nowadays to have a satysfying relationship that motivates to have kids you need a far healthier sex life. So the culture can be to blame.
My man you must do a video on hispanic dating in japan. Indian video and black dating was interesting but i havent seen youtubers doing latinos dating perspective in japan.
Fantastic topic. Was nice to see deer everyone’s gears grinding about it. Crazy to hear how little couples are going at it. Don’t worry Japan, some of us are coming soon to help! 🤣
Connexion between spouse are more important than anything else. This is why you feel cherish and bless to live with your chosen one. Communication and welling to open their heart are the keys to build a bond between two people but I don’t think these match Japanese skills.
I think all these mentioned reasons are actually there but I can think of one other huge reason... that many don't want to address. Now let the stones fly as I say that porn for both men and women has greatly decreased our desire for one another. On one end it's way more easy to just pop on an image and go at it alone. Then there is the misconception on what sex and the body should look like when most average people are not that picture perfect. It raises the bar for both genders to look perfect along with all the financial statuses. I live here in Korea which is also struggling with birth rate and more and more people wanting to be single. When I ask my guy friends in their 30's why they don't pursue a relationship porn comes up as one of the top reasons EVERY single time. It's always porn is easier than a relationship, real women don't look like that or won't do that, women expect too much from men such as looks and being rich, and that women expect them to behave like some k-drama prince. On the flip side women get into all these false romance novels, porn, k-dramas, and fan bases that feed them this ideal set of what a man should be but can never achieve. Both genders are being deceived but hey, everyone does it right, so why not.
Porn, exactly. It's the free, silent and deliberate depopulation tool. I say free, that's not really true. The actual true cost is staggering. Individuals loose their moral compass, their confidence and soul. Resulting in depression, loneliness and no children. Free porn is so easy to access it's almost like it's a deliberate culling of the masses.
I was married to a wonderful Japanese woman in 1986. She turned into a frigid, horrible shrew immediately after our daughter was born in 1987. I finally divorced her in 1999 because I could no longer imagine living the rest of my life with that intolerable obatallion. THat was 25 years ago. The best decision I've ever made.
I am in pretty much same situation for same reason. Son sleeping with her mother, and me separately. It's all about being mother and father, there is no anymore couple.
@@tartempion5414 Sorry that the cat is already out of the proverbial bag. I’ve seen and heard of this all many times. I don’t know you or your spouse nor what your relationship was like prior to kids, prior to marriage… and even then it only you two really know all the goes on. This is just to say that outside advice can really be like opinions… everyone has one and they all stink. So that being said… I can only really speak to my own experience and give advice based on it. From when we first started dating and we talked about our families and such, I found out that her father worked and her mother was essentially a housewife who eventually did part time cleaning as the kids got older. Both of my parents have always worked… sometimes two jobs each. So early in our relationship (and reiterated many times over the years) I made it clear that I had no need for a housewife and the automatic expectation that a woman gets to stay home at least until the kids start school if not longer just because of how human reproduction works and she won the lottery of having a uterus and ovaries is ridiculous. Men are capable of raising and nuturing children, why shouldn’t the husband be the one who stays home… especially if the wife is a high income earner? From an economic perspective, having two incomes means we can afford a higher standard of living and also have another income to pay the bills in the event of layoffs, illness, etc. She agreed with me and while a family member has commented “you poor thing, having to work after having children”, the two of us have been fine with it… especially since I intended and have been heavily involved in child rearing (and actually I am the more experienced of us from having cared for and babysat my younger cousins while growing up). When it came to having the baby sleep in our bed and fine details of child rearing… we took advice from another international couple who gave birth to their kids in Japan and the US… the “common sense” things that people will tell you can be quite different between the two countries, sometimes directly opposed… which means there is no exact “right way”. You just gotta work out what works for you both and your family… and we took that to heart. As far as infants sleeping in bed with us, I showed and discussed with my wife the various studies and recommendations from groups like American Association of Pediatricians and we decided that having the baby in a bassinet in our room would keep the baby close while promoting safety. Of course there was the occasional nap with one of us from time to time. As toddler there would be a couple days a week where kids were allowed to sleep with us and the rest of the week they were expected to sleep in their own room. As far as education goes, we discussed it while dating and before having children… we both put a heavy emphasis on providing the best education that we can afford and ensuring as much Japanese fluency as possible… both because no one in my wife’s family speaks English and also because it leaves open the option of going to college in Japan (more affordable than the insane tuition in the US). None of this is to say that our relationship is perfect or even ideal. I can only say something corny like… communication is key… listening, understanding and being willing to compromise while offering your thoughts and opinions… advocating for yourself, because if you don’t do it… who will? Sorry for the novel, but good luck to you!
Sad, but true. As I've said in other posts, most Japanese seem to view marriage as a "contract", with specific responsibilities for each spouse. The husband is expected to be the financial provider for the family, while the wife is designated as the caring mother of their children. If they meet those qualifications, then the marriage is deemed successful. albeit sexless. They are marrying a responsibility, not a human being.....
That's so scary to hear. I heard that kind of story many times now. I have a Japanese friend who is interested in me. I met her once already, but after hearing all those stories I'm sure if I should continu on this path to have a Japanese spouse.
@@EdwinpottilliusDon’t be scared, be prepared… be purposeful in your relationship. From the beginning take nothing for granted or “we’ll figure it out”. Talk about what you want from a relationship… how you ideally imagine married life. How many children? Will both of your continue to work after having children? Life after kids start school, life after they’ve gone to college. Getting older. And of course your assumptions and expectations for these things, being romantic partners even after children and sex. Just imagine that even between two people of the same background, each household has their own way to doing things, different receipts for common things… standards for cleanliness. When you add coming from two different cultures, that just adds yet another layer. So… communication from beginning is key. Good luck!
It's scary! Man it looks like people has completely normalized the situation! Everyone's got deep reasonin' about the issue, married couples and unmarried ones; still I perceive some kind of resignation when I listen to these people.
I don’t understand that at all. I’ve been a once a day person since I got married. At the least, two or three times a week and it’s not because I don’t want to. But my husband suddenly stopped. Then he told me he wanted to divorce me. After the intimacy died, the connection and love died, too.
"People without confidence are passive". How do you think people lose confidence? It's due to experience. They get rejected all the time. Why then keep bothering and humiliating oneself?
As an American, I have never been into the “one night stand”culture we have here. I believe especially for women, in order to maintain intimacy, you need to keep your lady happy. Make sure everyday you let her know she’s loved, important, a priority and attractive to you. Pay attention to the little things. Make sure she feels validated when she brings things up to you and MATCH HER ENERGY!! No one likes it when they’re being playful and flirty with their partner and their partner doesn’t match their energy.
Seems to be the reason is the same with what happens in the west. Emotional safety, "the chase"(or the feel of dating), communication, continuing the romance, being supportive of each other etc...
Japan's population will halve by the end of the century and the old will have to be "eliminated" because there won't be enough young people to take care of them. A population divided by 2 also means a doubled debt for each remaining individual. Since Japan is already the most indebted country, this will inevitably bankrupt the country. It's all going to fall apart. All these childless people are going to grow old and die alone. This is so sad.
Japan is also the world's largest foreign creditor. Also, most of Japan's debt is to itself. It could write off that debt, print money and not suffer inflation. Also, all forecasts point to 50% of current jobs being rendered obsolete by AI and mass automation within the next 20 years. That's half the current jobs in 20 years! A reduction in population is prudent at this time. As always the Japanese are ahead of the curve in this era of change.
@@gordonbgrahamyou must be under the assumption that Japan has the best banking practices and don’t lie on the balance sheet. Which is completely wrong. Just look at Olympus , Nissan , SoftBank. Which is just to name a few but their economy can’t take a major hit like their population decrease .
@@badbot4ever566 The population decrease is prudent at this time. Also, Japan's birthrate hit its nadir in 2005 @ 1.25 . It's currently 1.34, a slight rise in two decades. People assume a trend in one direction means a continuous movement in that direction when trends fluctuate according to a myriad of reasons. Japan's population is levelling out to a more sustainable level in an age when AI and mass automation will have made 50% of current jobs obsolete within the next 20 years.
I believe there are expectations for the first two years, then the novelty or newness wears off and reality sets in. Then expectations of each other change with the couple. Complete honesty and communication must always be exchanged with the couple, and never take each other for granted. Accepting people for who they are goes a long way for understanding your significant other. Peace and blessings be with you all.
As a Westerner, i got a question. Is it not normal for a Boyfriend / Girlfriend to live together, before Marrige ? Not that there is anything wrong with that, but its so far from my culture i have difficulty grasping that concept :)
Marriage is the death of sex. Even with all things being relatively the same as the beginning of the relationship, the man will still have the same desire for his wife, but she is done. Now the husband is trapped in a loveless, sexless relationship by a financially binding contract with the government aka “marriage”. This happened to me in the sixth or seventh year of marriage. We were both about 33. In the first 3 years we couldn’t get our hands off each other. It was every night. By year 7 it was 2-3 times a month and only because I was “earning/pleading” for it. A sad state of affairs. It’s better not to marry. You must also be aware of cohabitation laws. A series of 1-2 year relationships is probably best. Once the desire dies, move on without financial punishment.
Well now a days women expire at 32years of age, so agreed she has to be replaced every 2years since she have destroyed her own value thrue Feminism and acting like a man
Everybody is individual. Every couple is individual. You had no luck. This is sad, but happy marriage is possible . In my family nobody is divorced and they celebrate their silver/gold wedding day while kissing each other as if they would be still 20 years old
Anti Sexless Marriage Goals: -Treat each other as equals -Provide emotional support -Communicate with each other regularly -Try to have 'skinship' as often as possible -Be more proactive acting on your desires
Asian women in general seem to not care about sex unless it's during dating, in which case it's used to just bait a man in. I can speak from 8 years of experience.
I remember a long time ago, a young japanese man said "I won't married to someone i love" i asked why, he said "because marriage is an institution and a duty to your family and society, it needs balance and a partner that suitable for you, while love is very unpredictable and it can be ended anytime." I said, but you'll be happier if you married to someone you love. He laughed and said, "please you must differentiate between marriage and romance" .... Then years later, he indeed married to a woman who considered as a perfect match for him, while the one he loved or loves was left behind after years of long relationship. When Japanese men reach their 40, the pressure to get married is high, especially for those who has wealth and position, men consider an adult and upgrade his position in society if they get married. People will still congratulate you even if everybody knows what kind of marriage you have, a physical and fake marriage is still a marriage there. Btw...the Japanese man i know, said this to his long-term partner before they broke their relationship, "we're adults now let's grow up and do our duty to our family" i was baffled because the partner also said yes😅 i didn't bless the marriage, i didn't come to the wedding also, although I've known him for decades now.... I don't know why... it's really disturbing for me... I don't want to cut ties with them, but maybe ....I don't want to be involved in their fake life
The Japanese are very reserved and polite. I think that probably leads to a lot of distancing even in relationships. I find it difficult to imagine a loving touchy Japanese couple.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 If they keep pushing high qualification standard or else they'll turned into crazy cat-lady or crazy dog-man or the movie called "The 40 years old virgins" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Depends on the relationship... in this specific society, I can see how easy it is to get sight of intimacy with one's partner. Even in western society, the stress and work of daily life can make us lose sight of many things too, its hard to make time, one needs a very communicative, very understanding partner to continue being close, which a lot of women dont have that understanding partner, lot of factors.
Physically touching. Things like hugging or casually touching a person's arm or kissing or other forms of physical contact are unusual in Japanese culture. But there's scientific evidence that physical touch builds emotional bonds, so they can kind of push themselves to do it, despite that. So calling it skinship is kind of a way of basically justifying something that is kind of culturally weird. Like it's weird to just touch a person or hold them for no reason, but its ok because it's skinship.
Didn't hear it mentioned but in Japan toddlers sleep in the same bed as their parents! It's no wonder that their numbers are low especially after first kid.
People are becoming more practical about the costs related to sex inside and outside of marriage. Love isn't free. Job security, housing, marriage expenses, child-rearing costs, and uncertain retirement income all add to financial stress. These money issues create a constant barrier to being relaxed and carefree. If the connection is lacking in frequency, connection, and curiosity, you have to accept the hand you’ve been dealt.
You should live the way you want. Doesn't have to be about money. Problem is people copy what others do...need the house, two cars, study, study, study, dad working all hours.
Sorry this is so long: Limited sex in Japan might be the results of how youth are expected to behave during school ages. My understanding is that dating is a NO NO at school ages. This is supported by parents. I clearly understand why school ages youth dating is prohibited. Youth hormones take over and unprotected sex will occur. Having youth focus on education is very important and youth relationships can be a distraction as it is here in America. Yet, clearly having the sexes separated can imprint on the youth developing minds and attitudes that relationships are not important. It could be now as adults' relationships are not important, thus less marriages and worse less sex in marriages. Could it be married couples that don’t have sex with their spouses have sex with others? I’ve seen videos on this topic. Sexless marriages would be normal to me if sex outside of the marriage is accepted by Japanese society. When I was stationed in Japan, I had an outing with some friends who brought their Japanese women who they dated. One of my friend’s girlfriend brought a girlfriend of hers along to keep me company since I didn’t have a date. Everyone knew I was married. Yet I was told that having a relationship outside of my marriage in Japan is OK. I was very shocked hearing this concept. I declined to have the friend as a date. Yet, I was still respectful to my companion, and we had a great time just as friends who just met. At the end of the day my companion said she wish Japan was more like me and not have dating & sex outside of relationships. Women accept the practice because they have no recourse. We stayed friends until I returned to America after my tour of duty. My understanding now is that women are now having sex outside their marriages in today’s Japan. It would be good to see how Japanese, especially the dateless and unmarried, think of the scenario keeping the sexes apart during school ages. Maybe because it’s so normal that sex separation during the school age, most Japanese don’t think it’s an effect in adulthood. I personally think the youth separation could be an effect of why Japan’s sexless marriages are happening. As well as why young - middle age adults are relationship less. I also wonder what the older, 60+, think of the topic? Maybe a good idea for your next videos????
The Japanese government needs to make efforts to provide facilities such as permanent cheap housing especially in near tokyo or osaka and lots of job opportunities. Don't rely on debt but must try to be self-sufficient locally. local entrepreneurs and also teach people about economics properly in schools. Don't just save and reduce cost. but also trying to produce results such as facilitating young TH-camrs to be more productive. with a good economy, the population will increase
that's why soapland rumbles... Meshida said that Japanese men don't have sex with their wives because the family is sacred, so instead both the husband and the wife have sex with other people, japanese logic...
Eh? That’s more comedy than reality. It was mentioned during the interviews in this video, after getting married and having kids, Japanese couples start to see each other less and less as romantic partners and just as “family”… like siblings or best friends with the wife now focusing almost exclusively on child rearing. Dressing to a certain imagined stereotype for a certain age, doesn’t help it at all. Referring to each other as “mother” and “father” instead of your given names (when talking to each other) because of the children doesn’t help things either.
@@jmbickham but yes, it is the same in Europe and America example, just foreigners regularly like overmystify Japan, people are basically the same everywhere, here in Europe, where I live, marriages are the same as in Japan
My view of the Japanese is that far too many of them want to live in Tokyo, where land is limited, making housing both crowded and expensive. Women must work to pay the rent, and who would want to have three kids (the minimum needed to grow the population) when confined to a tiny apartment? Unless/until the Japanese give up on flocking to Tokyo, which holds about 30% of the population, Japan's population will continue to shrink. I have read that the amount of "livable land" for all of Japan is quite small due to its volcanic nature. Thus, it is natural that Tokyo continues to draw in a large percentage of the population. It's a vicious cycle that no government policy can reverse. Hence, Japan is doomed
You go where the jobs are, especially if you went to university to get a particular degree. If companies were in the rural areas, they'd get people that would want to live there. You are correct about the inhabitable land, but the current system doesn't help. There should be more than enough right now to move the needle a bit.
1. Could be due to comparatively lower levels of testosterone hormone in both males and females in Japan. Testosterone is vital for libido, muscle mass, beard hairs, bone mass, aggression, etc. 2. Coolidge effect- Same woman every time every day does not stimulate sexual stimulation and interest from man's side. Man biologically needs new sex partner on regular basis to keep him sexually active. This is called "Coolidge Effect" and this behaviour has also been confirmed in other mammals.
You can also have protected sex, so the reason with the children is hypocritical. And the time lost going to the brothel is greater than the time from work to home, so the excuse of overworking doesn't hold either. The Japanese survives earthquakes, tsunamis, high school (this has a higher mortality rate than earthquakes), invests in cosmetics, looks, courts a woman for a long time and when he finally gets married, he gives up sex. Final verdict: no offense, but mental illness seems more plausible than the rest of the arguments with the cost of raising children, extended work, etc. Basically, a kind of slow harakiri, without shortening the pain
I think mental illness would be taking it too far. It's mostly how they view marriage. In fact, each person sees couple's love differently. For some, sex is important and they look for that as a priority, for others it is the emotional connection, for others it is both, etc. It seems to me that for japaneses it is more of an "emotional connection + being a productive member of society", rather than enjoying sex as a couple and having children.
After being married, 26 years, if I don’t do the deed at least once a week, I go crazy lollllllllll……..also bring cheeky with one another, playful helps keep the flame alive.
I see a lot of comments that suggest the reason is that many Japanese people are exhausted due to their work culture. However, if you look into it, while Japanese workers work hard, the hours they work rank fairly low, according to Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development. The average yearly hours for Japanese workers have dropped from 2243 in 1970 to 1607 in 2022. Compare that to Columbia where the average worker works 2405 hours annually. In the US, we work an average of 1810 hours. The US comes in at number 13 on the list, and Japan at 31. Columbia and Mexico are number 1 and 2, respectively. Of course, these are averages, so each country will have people who put in a lot more and a lot fewer hours than the average.
誰が格好良いと思いますか？
もちろんキムタクで～す。
I'm in IT and the few Japanese I've known (men and women) work in the office, then they go back home and start working again until they go to sleep. So the "official" hours they work look normal, but the real hours are 50% higher on average. Also, all those extra hours, since they are unofficial, are unpaid.
@@Johnny_Savage I'm certain that some do leave the office, only to go home and continue their work. There are people all over the world that do the same. However, the vast majority of workers, even in Japan, do not have jobs that they are able to do from home. Auto mechanics, cashiers, nuclear power plant technicians, and so on can't continue to work from their living room. Folks in those kinds of jobs probably work some unpaid overtime, but while illegal, is common. Also, the numbers I mentioned are average hours, so you could have two people who work 20 hours a week and one working 60 hours. That makes their average work week a little over 33 hours. It's a bit misleading because if you look at the details, 1/3 of those workers are being overworked while 2/3 are well rested. If the Japanese workforce was made up of only office workers, and people working on salary rather than hourly, I'd say your 50% more hours could be correct, but most people do not work those kinds of jobs.
Idk if you've been to, let alone lived in Japan but during my stays I was able to confirm for myself what I've heard about Japan: The work culture is very different compared to the west. Job and private life have no strict separation, overtime work is still the norm, social pressure to partake in after work activities is incredibly high. Especially in big cities the streets are full of salary men till late at night.
@@maiy8786 I agree with some of what you say, but most applies to the salaryman type jobs. They do emphasize boding, which usually means going out and getting drunk at the "request" of their boss. The Japanese work culture is different in many ways, but most of that is due to employee loyalty to the company they work for. The stereotype we have of the Japanese work culture is mostly based on the salaryman culture. A Lawson's employee is off work when their shift is over.
Sex itself will not increase birth rate. Couples need to have a desire and feel ready to have kids.
How? No strong spiritual and religious background= no strong desire to have children.
Atheism turns into nihilism. Nihilism teaches us that there's no benefit of having kids that can't save us and will die anyway after us. That's why there's never been an atheist society. They naturally die out from lack of reproduction.
💯 Agree, it's a big responsibility
Feminism needs to be stamped out
Looks like men blame the government or the women for not having kids...but remember kids are the best wealth one can have as a family
@@onemaster8133The blame( accountability really) would be on the men if they start having the ability to get pregnant and give birth 😊.
Tiptoeing around the women's feelings won't solve anything.
Hats off one of the best interview channel on utube!
The marriages are not that often sexless, they are having sex, just not with each other. The prostitution and love hotel scene is..... substantial and normalised.
Correct.
There are many married woman doing soap or offering sex for money via websites etc.
Bingo.
As it should be. What would you do as a man if after just 6 months your woman stops being interested in doing it? You either divorce/separate or you stay together but look for professional girls.
It's pretty clear from the conversations that the sex referred to was sex IN the marriage, sex outside of the marriage excluded. The question was about sex between the couple, whether they still do it (together) anymore. And the most important part is that those who answered, understood the question this way.
As a European woman married for 12 years and being with my husband for almost 20 years now in total, these opinions seem so wrong to me... There shouldn't be such a thing as too much time together. I mean that's why you get married, because you love your partner enough that you want to share your life with them. Being exhausted and overworked is not only a Japanese phenomenon so it shouldn't be an excuse either. Simply just being with your partner at night, have dinner, chat and relax together, should lift-off your daily burdens. Last but not least, children strengthen the bond when the foundations of the marriage are strong and healthy. Treat each other with respect, focus on communication and don't forget to take care of yourselves. But most importantly, choose your partner wisely. That's the only way a relationship can stand the test of time.
Its feminism! Feminism tells women that they owe men nothing, but men owe them something!
@inconnu4961 utter rubbish! My marriage is over after 28 years, I've done everything for him and got nothing back, im for women's rights and look how I've been treated. Stop blaming women for everything.
@@inconnu4961 If we are to play the blame game, I could say that men seek short-term pleasures and objectify their partners rather than respect them. But marriage should not be about pointing fingers and trying to dominate. It should be about mutual respect and sharing responsibilities. Giving and taking. Anything else is a recipe for failure, imo.
@@daphrodite80 I wouldn't gerneralise that men seek short-term pleasures over long term relationships. I would argue that men in general develop a deeper relationship over time in comparison with woman. Your description of a men should be the stereotype to avoid tbh 😅
I fully agree with the part about marriage tho :)
@@ZelltisExx My comment was in response to the person who said "It's feminism!", which is a generalization. My point was exactly that we shouldn't generalize (because there are plenty stereotypes not only for women but also for men) and we shouldn't blame one another in a relationship in order for it to work.
They’re having sex, just not with each other
It is also true. I was shocked when married women approached me in Japan.
@@ad.6472 men cheat more but in japan it's equal
Listen again to the question and how it's worded. And most importantly, how those who answered understood the question. Most assuredly the question was asking about sex IN the marriage, sex between the couple, sex outside the marriage excluded. And those who answered, understood it this way. Because that was what the question meant.
@@MisterHowzatthat’s how it would be answered anyways because sex outside of the marriage “doesn’t count”.
Unfortunately, they are in an open relationship.
1. Inadequate amount of work for a small salary, and constant stress.
2. For the past few decades, Japan has been killing pride and courage of Japanese men. And this is result of successful completion of the propaganda campaign.
3. Normalization of adultery.
I think so, looking from the outside.
I'm addressing your #1 point.
Working your butt off just to stay in place where you already are will destroy you mentally. This is the WEF "You will own nothing and be happy". Except you don't get the happy part. Cogs in the machine for the elites who think everyone else are insects. It destroys caring, and you end up going through the motions.
The country side is more or less empty and everyone wants/needs to be in the metro areas. Abandoned property that no one wants (including family) because the family is on the hook for all bills that come with it. Toss in bringing up older structures to current earthquake codes and it can be a deal breaker. Houses in the US are considered assets. Not so much in Japan. Sometimes it's easier to tear the house down and start all over. In the US that usually only happens for high end properties. My cousin did that on Cape Cod in Massachusetts. Bought a place and tore it down and put something bigger on the lot. He wanted the lot.
If the government gave incentives for businesses to have operations in more rural areas, people could breathe and there'd be less stress. Office jobs in cube farms do not need to be in high priced real estate. All you need is a fast internet connection.
I have a nephew that lives in Leesburg VA. The office is the HUGE defense contractor by Dulles Airport. About 6 miles away. When COVID started everyone worked from home. He still does. He and his wife hate the condo they are in and house prices are ridiculous. They lease the place and during COVID it was on the marker for $450K. Nice place, but not $450K nice. They leased with the possibility that the owner could sell out at the end. He's from North East PA. He and his wife are looking to go back. He might possibly lose out on advancement in the company. But, he doesn't believe so. Still does business trips. Has his gov. security clearance. He might have to do one on ones in the company every couple of months for a few days. That's a 3-4 hour car ride or a 45-60 minute plane ride.
Terrible. The only way to win that game is not to play it!
Honestly makes the most sense
@@fjorddenierbear4832 or the best option - move to a place where living is not so difficult.
Nope, they are active in sex but not with their wife, they go for prostitutes.
This explains why the birth rate in Japan has been disintegrate for years
Too much work, everybody is exhausted mentally and physically
People worked longer hours in the 1950s and 60s when the birthrate was 4 times as high
women worked longer hours then?@@gordonbgraham
@@gordonbgrahamWhy the need to comment on almost every comment?
@@invisiblyrandom7962 to address the same misconception
@@r4x2 Now, you’re getting to the core of the issue. Women entering the workforce in greater number and consumerism replacing having a family as a priority
From the USA. I’ve always thought sex was overrated and made a priority when it isn’t. Total lack of sex with your spouse is not normal though.
You're probably desensitised thanks to all the p0rn you watched early on in life, Its very much the same with japanese culture. They have some really weired and etreme p0rn. It's desensitised them to s3x, they arent aroused by their spouses any more and s3x industry caters to their weired fetishes.
It's a shame this is happening, I think it's an important part of a close relationship. We have been together 24 years and are 41 and 55 and still have an active sex life. I have family members who were still having sex in their 70's and 80's.
May I ask where are you from? Just to get better understanding from which side you come from
That's scary, you need to connect mentally not physically😢
@@lilsangarden ideally both, both are part of a healthy relationship
@@lilsangarden get help, please
Perhaps you value your partner properly. You know like...don't insult him, make time for him, cheer him on with his endeavours etc.
The married couple were such great interviewees. They seemed to have been through the phase and moved past it and were very thoughtful and open about the reasonings for what may cause this as well as how to overcome it. I especially loved the wife's statement at the end.
5:10 Ice Cream Girl has the best insight of all the interviewees here. Her wisdom is beyond impressive.
Imagine my shock to learn that she became sexless after only 6 months of marriage!
it's a crepe
She is very casual about it and just says whatever comes to mind. But she delivers her arguments with conviction and everything she says makes a lot of sense and seems brutally honest.
She was mostly just using the interview to speak her mind to her husband. If you watch it again with that in mind you see it in a whole new way.
Yes her husband definitely been seeing prostitutes
one lady said there are more important things then sex , but sex is one of the greatest way to know if your partner still loves you, is attracted to you and in that intimate movement how he tpuches you treats you tells a lot too
also if i got a wife like the married couples , the one with hat i feel, i will have sex with her on daily basis if she allowed me that is , and i want to have 4 kids , 2 we will make and other 2 adopted, 4 kids of our own .
Yes. Sex is the best way to bond and feel connected. Not just with the mind. But bodily, I mean our bodies are made for love.
Always a cringe copeout when someone says that too. Actually sex is very important it's one of the key factors that separates a true partnership and not just a business arrangement. A huge red flag that this woman will use sex as motivation or reward for the male or just wants to let herself go physically and not be held accountable.
@@Ekam-Sat not made of love in Jpan...women are baby-machines, and men are heartless working robots...ha!
Sex doesn't prove your partner loves you. People have sex with someone they don't love all the time for their own gratification.
By the way. Your channel and sub count doesn't nearly appreciate how well you present questions and follow up with great ones.
meh
"Real marriage is a spiritual marriage" - couldn't agree.
Bruh, same. I've heard less bullshit from multilevel marketing than that
Screw that! Pun intended.
They'll find out how spiritual their marriage is in divorce court. Real marriage is fiscal.
A real marriage needs sex too!! You must desire and lust for your partner!!!
Spiritual connection and physical connection aren't mutually exclusive. Just like you choose to drink, doesn't mean you don't have to eat 😂
Japanese men expect a wife to be a wife and mother, so her identity changes after marriage. I watched another interview recently asking men if they thought seeing a prostitute cheating. A majority said no, it was just sex, the women pretty much thought the same way. It's really sad. I can't imagine a life of no sex. how awful.
Me personally, I'd feel relieved not needing to have sex as someone asexual. I just want to cuddle all the time. Kisses, hugs, gentle tickling, ear licking, whispers, massage. All things I want to do and receive.
You are very st vpid, and pathetic.
@butamoe-my7qt So Is adultery and having affairs quite common among the Japanese men and women?
@@munfmyes it's common , they don't care about that.
@@munfmit's heaven country for people that love cheating . Many husband in the world Will jump out of happiness when their wife tell them to go and find P And do it with them
At 3:42
Interviewer: お名前は何ですか（What's your dog's name?)
Girl: プリンです (purin：pudding)
Interviewer: ふりん? (不倫（furin)：an affair, adultery)
Girl: プリンです。
LOL! 😄
The interesting thing here is thet they "start to see each other as family" which is the whole point but for some reason that stops attraction. The girl at 6:00 answers it best, how intriguing.
Totally agree 👍👍
Its bc shes not attracted to her husband
That was an incredible video! You have so much confidence in your interviews, it’s very enjoyable to watch! *subscribed*
as a foreigner married to Japanese I will give you one of the reason. In Japan in most family, kids sleep with their mother. So the usual time at night when you are between wife and husband is gone.
Facts
Yup. Over time it just adds to the idea/feeling of ones spouse being “family” and not a romantic partner.
For foreigners… knowing is half the battle and the other half is communication. These are issues to be discussed prior to marriage… although many if not most will not. Do you want your wife to work after having children or after they start school or not at all? If the wife is a high income earner are they ok with a stay-at-home husband? Infants in the same bed as adults… is a bit dangerous (although many people in general may do this). Why not a bassinet in the couple’s room? When the child is a toddler, why not again compromise and say once or twice a week they can sleep with mom and dad and the rest they sleep in their own bed? Things are hard enough for couples from the same background to learn to live together and start a family… for international and interracial couples, all of that just significantly increases. … which brings us back to the beginning… communication… and flexibility.
@@laptopstudy3279Trying to take the piss, but unfortunately I’ve had (and still get) plenty of attention from women over the years. Nice try though.
It is true.
This is complete nonsense excuse. If you want to have sex you’ll easily find a way. To share one bed with the whole family no matter age was common in the Middle Ages in Europe and they had 10+ children
Overworked and underpaid, which means less time for relationships and less money to support a family. Similar situation all over the world. However, I think it's even more severe in countries such as Japan, South Korea, etc.
Japan had 4 times the birthrate in the 1950s and 1960s when working hours were longer and the cost of living was higher
the problem is they goverment ,and also they act ,and i things japan need to make a little chance expecialy they work system
@@gordonbgraham Cost of living was higher in 50s and 60s ? LOL 😂😂
Shut up, npc
you don't need to have much money to have sex with woman. Only to buy condoms
I hate the excuse “shy.” When some Japanese people use the excuse “shy” it’s usually related to doing something hurtful or not helpful to someone else, like not allowing a foreigner into a restaurant or refusing to date foreigners or in this case, unwilling to have s*x with your partner which is something healthy you’re supposed to do in marriage/relationship.
When you refuse s*x to your spouse it means you reject them, which affects them mentally. It’s toxic behavior actually.
Your profile is hilarious
Women turned the demography upside down worldwide. I agre 100% what you just wrote.
@@airgaborpara3824most women aren't interested in sex as much as men so it's understandable why women are avoiding sex. In 3rd world traditional countries women are forced into marriages and sex and guys know Nothing about consent.
So women failed to evolve @frenzybuzz3703
Sounds more like the MEN are failing to evolve
The Japanese practice of sharing bed with their children just might have something to do with it.
This. I'm Japanese and I still wonder how my parents managed to do it during my childhood without me noticing.
@@lisprn-tt1tuMaybe they gave you sleeping pills
When conservative Americans do that, they produce inbreds
That's part of it. Yes!
@@lisprn-tt1tu they didn't..and if you have siblings, they did it once or twice for work ( pregnancy
Interesting video! Great perspectives
I think the main reason is the work. If they are mentally and physicially exhausted, of course nobody wants sex.
Then (not only in Japan) its important to take care of your marriage, to do something for it. Keep romantic moments, like leaving the child at kindergarten or, babysitter in order to go to a restaurant with the partner. When travelling, choose hotels which have the option of babysitting. Its important to have sometimes time as a couple. Well, when they are so exhausted from work, probably they are also not so motivated to plan this. But its necessary
I think not only work but a preassue of there society to the best among the rest competition of any aspect that's make them overthink and exhausted.
this absolutely baffles me. Very adorable dog and cute young couple.
Interesting! Japanese men, in general, seem to spend longer hours at work vs Western men. S the time spent together is actually less.Yet many of these people state too much time together. It appears in Japan people take partner to be with and perhaps have children rather than be with a partner they are attracted to sexually and also to build a life with. Many Western couples make a point of having date nights to re-engage the romantic feelings. Japanese culture seems to have evolved accepting prostitutes for sex while married. The urge has not gone away but is shifted to someone other than wife
One of the reasons is they don't see going to a prostitute as cheating. So, there are different and more exciting options other than your spouse without consequence.
Sounds great!
This is actually the main reason
This is sad.Up to a couple of months before my darling husband died January 2022 age 74 we were making love nearly every morning . We had amazing times together & I miss him heaps. Am almost 59 now
U have a very loving relationship with your hubby n that's lovely to know. He may be gone but I am sure all the lovely memories lives on
That age gap wow. Im 30 and i somehow get called a p*do by some women for going after 24 year olds.
@@ohno7582 nonsense! Now, 36 and 18...that is pushing it! But a twenty year gap is not impossible to accept, like 60/40 if the guy keeps in shape
@@wongkengmun1103her husband was a handsome chad…she wss attracted to him like most women were. Thats why the age gap didn’t matter he was very attractive…
you should engage with women in their late 20' s . Not like 23 / 24 😂😂@@ohno7582
I think it is the insane work culture that separates couples. If you are exhausted, sex is not the first thing in mind. Also, in traditional relationships, the worlds of working husbands and housewives have are very different, so understanding each other's problems and hopes can become overwhelming. In the video it was suggested that sharing a house and seeing each other often and not at their best would kill interest, but I don't see it that way. In my country the vast majority of couples live together before getting married, so you know what you will get. If you only see the future spouse all dressed up, good mood and having time for you, the reality of married life will be a wet rag against your face.
I’ll bet men aren’t too tired for porn and prostitutes.
Mostly true but I know some women who desire sex more when they are under stress. I guess it all depends.
No it's the feminism
@@AndreiGeorgescu-j9p Both. Convincing women to work their ass of outside of the home was the greatest trick the devil ever pulled.
@@Ekam-Sat in Japan they stop working when they have a kid and frankly people have never worked less or been less stressed or in danger in all of history so all of this is just a copout to give a neutral "work bad" answer to take away from the real issue. Wmn acting like mn and wasting the prime years of their lives sleeping around and focusing on their state subsidized "careers"is what's killing it. And as you say if work is so bad then why are they all being told to go be work drones and compete with their own potential husbands in the workforce?
That girl could talk forever with food on her face.
It sure was strange, was she botoxed?
😂
Good with her mouth 💋
Nice work, man!
No mention of love. Obviously, they marry for the wrong reasons and have no idea as to what makes a loving marriage work.
Right on. The Japanese are inundated with societal pressures, and this applies to marriage as well. While the family unit is extremely important, spouses must realize that they are married to each other - not to their children.
My man spent half his life learning japanese so he could ask japanese people how many times they have sex. You better subscribe to this legend
u can litteraly learn japanese in 1 years.
8h per days doing only this tho.
@@Aeris_InJapanYou can not. You clearly don't know what you are talking about.
The interviewer is very fluent and has a good vocabulary range. I understand almost everything but to he able to speak this fluently is an achievement.
@@Aeris_InJapan Good luck with that
@@Aeris_InJapanYeah I dunno about that even if you’re going to a Japanese language school in Japan full time and diligently studying at home very night. One would be able to carry on a conversation, but being able to speak on complex topics… it’s going to take more than just an intensive year.
OTOH, while the interviewer does have good Japanese overall, his accent is foreign. But that’s ok as he is still easily understood. There is also no way it took him half his life to learn Japanese.
There are people for whom learning languages is easy. I know people who are fluent in several languages like English, Chinese mandarian, 😊Russian French, Italian, Spanish and German. They exist.
It is the same reason as everywhere but more severe in Japan: no more real fun together when married. Men have to keep the dating going and create emotions in their wife by being playful + teasing her + having fun activities. but especially in stressed Japan many men dont use the energy they have left for fun instead let their wife be bored at home.
This right here.
Sounds like they marry the fantasy without actually getting to know the real person. After marriage, one begins to see real life and the other person's real self, which is a hassle: we are not, in fact, fantasy lovers whose only job is to fulfill expectations. So they seek the fantasy outside the relationship, where hosts and hostesses play the role. Ultimately the marriages sound like superficial social institutions, rather than relationships of genuine mutual appreciation and love.
One big reason is married couples live in close quarters with their kids up even thru adulthood. Very common. Often sleeping in the same room or close by.
the two young women friends are very thoughtful, and willing to consider even more
"it doesnt matter how attractive you are, you are going to be cheated on" japan, my god.
National sport - lol
It's not cheating when the wife does not forfill her duty as a wife and make love with her man.
Then it becomes like she is hiring a maid to do the cleaning at home or a chef to cook food for them.
Sorry not sorry, feminism is cancer
that's just generalizing and absolutely not true
@@olafian2450 I’ve been here for more than 12 years, and unfortunately more than 50 or 60% of the people (specially women) who you ask, they will say that’s something that will happen at some point, but they don’t mind as long as they don’t know, so yeah, it is generalizing, not everyone thinks like that, but half or more than half of the population
@@laptopstudy3279To deprive someone of something implies they're entitled to it in the first place. Which implies you believe in transactional relationships and not healthy ones.
What's skinship? New word.
Touching
@js7un165
Only in japan🇯🇵🇯🇵🇯🇵
First time I've heard of that word too
👀😳🤔🤷♂️🤦♂️
Cuddling
I guess it means affection.
Physical affection like holding hands, cuddling, etc
The more I learn about the Japanese, the more I realize that they seem to be natural born loners. I should know about that, for I am one. Now combine that with the intense politeness (which is indicative to the Japanese culture) when they first meet someone, it is no wonder that after marriage they then see the 'other side' of their partners, and thus, get turned off. Their expectations get ruined. And being too shy about sex is another wrench in the gears. So, in short, the blame could simply be the culture. Change that part of it, and things would likely turn around.
Very similar to Nordic countries like Sweden
Turn around to what? The Japanese had an even more strict culture in the 1950s and 60s when the birthrate was 4 times as high as it is now.
@@fayelis As a Swede, I have heard that comparison before, on numerous occasions.
Shyness is a somewhat incorrect term that has become very popular. It's not that they are exactly shy, but rather they are passive and have been educated not to disrespect others. The initiative to do things often goes against that, but initiative is something that causes a lot of sexual attraction at the same time. Most women, in any country, prefer a man who takes the initiative.
@@gordonbgraham for a birth rate of four it is sufficient to have sex four times in your life with a bit of luck. Nowadays to have a satysfying relationship that motivates to have kids you need a far healthier sex life. So the culture can be to blame.
My man you must do a video on hispanic dating in japan. Indian video and black dating was interesting but i havent seen youtubers doing latinos dating perspective in japan.
There is also the not insubstantial 'adult entertainment' industry providing a virtual substitute.
There seems to be a lack of loving nurturing in their relationships. Which has led to many living in isolation and loneliness.
Fantastic topic. Was nice to see deer everyone’s gears grinding about it. Crazy to hear how little couples are going at it. Don’t worry Japan, some of us are coming soon to help! 🤣
those two japaneses just eating camera, not giving a single fuck lmao.
you can say they are legit ずれる
19:06 I can feel homie on the left cringing from here.
My man was watching too many Isekai animes
@NoxLegend1 did he? Tell me about it
@@MichaelGroenendijk google it kid
except it's true...there are many many Japanese men with upwards of a dozen wives and girlfriends. They all know about each other to.
Connexion between spouse are more important than anything else. This is why you feel cherish and bless to live with your chosen one. Communication and welling to open their heart are the keys to build a bond between two people but I don’t think these match Japanese skills.
This is actually intriguing. Once married they are not sexually attracted to each other anymore as they see each other as family.
Its called History - for a reason.
I think all these mentioned reasons are actually there but I can think of one other huge reason... that many don't want to address. Now let the stones fly as I say that porn for both men and women has greatly decreased our desire for one another. On one end it's way more easy to just pop on an image and go at it alone. Then there is the misconception on what sex and the body should look like when most average people are not that picture perfect. It raises the bar for both genders to look perfect along with all the financial statuses. I live here in Korea which is also struggling with birth rate and more and more people wanting to be single. When I ask my guy friends in their 30's why they don't pursue a relationship porn comes up as one of the top reasons EVERY single time. It's always porn is easier than a relationship, real women don't look like that or won't do that, women expect too much from men such as looks and being rich, and that women expect them to behave like some k-drama prince. On the flip side women get into all these false romance novels, porn, k-dramas, and fan bases that feed them this ideal set of what a man should be but can never achieve. Both genders are being deceived but hey, everyone does it right, so why not.
Porn, exactly. It's the free, silent and deliberate depopulation tool. I say free, that's not really true. The actual true cost is staggering. Individuals loose their moral compass, their confidence and soul. Resulting in depression, loneliness and no children. Free porn is so easy to access it's almost like it's a deliberate culling of the masses.
I was married to a wonderful Japanese woman in 1986. She turned into a frigid, horrible shrew immediately after our daughter was born in 1987. I finally divorced her in 1999 because I could no longer imagine living the rest of my life with that intolerable obatallion. THat was 25 years ago. The best decision I've ever made.
I am in pretty much same situation for same reason. Son sleeping with her mother, and me separately. It's all about being mother and father, there is no anymore couple.
@@tartempion5414 Sorry that the cat is already out of the proverbial bag. I’ve seen and heard of this all many times. I don’t know you or your spouse nor what your relationship was like prior to kids, prior to marriage… and even then it only you two really know all the goes on. This is just to say that outside advice can really be like opinions… everyone has one and they all stink. So that being said… I can only really speak to my own experience and give advice based on it.
From when we first started dating and we talked about our families and such, I found out that her father worked and her mother was essentially a housewife who eventually did part time cleaning as the kids got older. Both of my parents have always worked… sometimes two jobs each. So early in our relationship (and reiterated many times over the years) I made it clear that I had no need for a housewife and the automatic expectation that a woman gets to stay home at least until the kids start school if not longer just because of how human reproduction works and she won the lottery of having a uterus and ovaries is ridiculous. Men are capable of raising and nuturing children, why shouldn’t the husband be the one who stays home… especially if the wife is a high income earner? From an economic perspective, having two incomes means we can afford a higher standard of living and also have another income to pay the bills in the event of layoffs, illness, etc. She agreed with me and while a family member has commented “you poor thing, having to work after having children”, the two of us have been fine with it… especially since I intended and have been heavily involved in child rearing (and actually I am the more experienced of us from having cared for and babysat my younger cousins while growing up).
When it came to having the baby sleep in our bed and fine details of child rearing… we took advice from another international couple who gave birth to their kids in Japan and the US… the “common sense” things that people will tell you can be quite different between the two countries, sometimes directly opposed… which means there is no exact “right way”. You just gotta work out what works for you both and your family… and we took that to heart. As far as infants sleeping in bed with us, I showed and discussed with my wife the various studies and recommendations from groups like American Association of Pediatricians and we decided that having the baby in a bassinet in our room would keep the baby close while promoting safety. Of course there was the occasional nap with one of us from time to time. As toddler there would be a couple days a week where kids were allowed to sleep with us and the rest of the week they were expected to sleep in their own room. As far as education goes, we discussed it while dating and before having children… we both put a heavy emphasis on providing the best education that we can afford and ensuring as much Japanese fluency as possible… both because no one in my wife’s family speaks English and also because it leaves open the option of going to college in Japan (more affordable than the insane tuition in the US).
None of this is to say that our relationship is perfect or even ideal. I can only say something corny like… communication is key… listening, understanding and being willing to compromise while offering your thoughts and opinions… advocating for yourself, because if you don’t do it… who will?
Sorry for the novel, but good luck to you!
Sad, but true. As I've said in other posts, most Japanese seem to view marriage as a "contract", with specific responsibilities for each spouse. The husband is expected to be the financial provider for the family, while the wife is designated as the caring mother of their children. If they meet those qualifications, then the marriage is deemed successful. albeit sexless. They are marrying a responsibility, not a human being.....
That's so scary to hear. I heard that kind of story many times now. I have a Japanese friend who is interested in me. I met her once already, but after hearing all those stories I'm sure if I should continu on this path to have a Japanese spouse.
@@EdwinpottilliusDon’t be scared, be prepared… be purposeful in your relationship. From the beginning take nothing for granted or “we’ll figure it out”. Talk about what you want from a relationship… how you ideally imagine married life. How many children? Will both of your continue to work after having children? Life after kids start school, life after they’ve gone to college. Getting older. And of course your assumptions and expectations for these things, being romantic partners even after children and sex. Just imagine that even between two people of the same background, each household has their own way to doing things, different receipts for common things… standards for cleanliness. When you add coming from two different cultures, that just adds yet another layer. So… communication from beginning is key.
Good luck!
It's scary! Man it looks like people has completely normalized the situation! Everyone's got deep reasonin' about the issue, married couples and unmarried ones; still I perceive some kind of resignation when I listen to these people.
"Use it, or Lose it" !!
I don’t understand that at all. I’ve been a once a day person since I got married. At the least, two or three times a week and it’s not because I don’t want to.
But my husband suddenly stopped. Then he told me he wanted to divorce me. After the intimacy died, the connection and love died, too.
Hello, trust me, it's not just Japanese marriages! 😢
They have the same problem we do. Their work culture benefits a small group of foreigners at everybody else's expense
I think it's a bigger problem. Than just in Japan it happens other places as well
"People without confidence are passive". How do you think people lose confidence? It's due to experience. They get rejected all the time. Why then keep bothering and humiliating oneself?
As an American, I have never been into the “one night stand”culture we have here. I believe especially for women, in order to maintain intimacy, you need to keep your lady happy. Make sure everyday you let her know she’s loved, important, a priority and attractive to you. Pay attention to the little things. Make sure she feels validated when she brings things up to you and MATCH HER ENERGY!! No one likes it when they’re being playful and flirty with their partner and their partner doesn’t match their energy.
Seems to be the reason is the same with what happens in the west. Emotional safety, "the chase"(or the feel of dating), communication, continuing the romance, being supportive of each other etc...
Japan's population will halve by the end of the century and the old will have to be "eliminated" because there won't be enough young people to take care of them. A population divided by 2 also means a doubled debt for each remaining individual. Since Japan is already the most indebted country, this will inevitably bankrupt the country. It's all going to fall apart. All these childless people are going to grow old and die alone. This is so sad.
You have no idea what you’re talking about . “Eliminated” what a silly idea
Japan is also the world's largest foreign creditor. Also, most of Japan's debt is to itself. It could write off that debt, print money and not suffer inflation. Also, all forecasts point to 50% of current jobs being rendered obsolete by AI and mass automation within the next 20 years. That's half the current jobs in 20 years! A reduction in population is prudent at this time. As always the Japanese are ahead of the curve in this era of change.
My friend just came back from Japan, and in the countryside there is a good number of empty and abandoned houses because the people lived their died.
@@gordonbgrahamyou must be under the assumption that Japan has the best banking practices and don’t lie on the balance sheet. Which is completely wrong. Just look at Olympus , Nissan , SoftBank. Which is just to name a few but their economy can’t take a major hit like their population decrease .
@@badbot4ever566 The population decrease is prudent at this time. Also, Japan's birthrate hit its nadir in 2005 @ 1.25 . It's currently 1.34, a slight rise in two decades. People assume a trend in one direction means a continuous movement in that direction when trends fluctuate according to a myriad of reasons. Japan's population is levelling out to a more sustainable level in an age when AI and mass automation will have made 50% of current jobs obsolete within the next 20 years.
I believe there are expectations for the first two years, then the novelty or newness wears off and reality sets in. Then expectations of each other change with the couple. Complete honesty and communication must always be exchanged with the couple, and never take each other for granted. Accepting people for who they are goes a long way for understanding your significant other. Peace and blessings be with you all.
As a Westerner, i got a question. Is it not normal for a Boyfriend / Girlfriend to live together, before Marrige ? Not that there is anything wrong with that, but its so far from my culture i have difficulty grasping that concept :)
Marriage is the death of sex. Even with all things being relatively the same as the beginning of the relationship, the man will still have the same desire for his wife, but she is done. Now the husband is trapped in a loveless, sexless relationship by a financially binding contract with the government aka “marriage”.
This happened to me in the sixth or seventh year of marriage. We were both about 33. In the first 3 years we couldn’t get our hands off each other. It was every night. By year 7 it was 2-3 times a month and only because I was “earning/pleading” for it. A sad state of affairs.
It’s better not to marry. You must also be aware of cohabitation laws. A series of 1-2 year relationships is probably best. Once the desire dies, move on without financial punishment.
Well now a days women expire at 32years of age, so agreed she has to be replaced every 2years since she have destroyed her own value thrue Feminism and acting like a man
I’m sorry to hear that, is sad and the love goes away.
Everybody is individual. Every couple is individual. You had no luck. This is sad, but happy marriage is possible . In my family nobody is divorced and they celebrate their silver/gold wedding day while kissing each other as if they would be still 20 years old
@@blume0121It's absolutely not an "individual" thing. We have statistics on it.
@@bobertoroberto953 Statistics that you can easily backout a few demographics and get an entirely different story
Anti Sexless Marriage Goals:
-Treat each other as equals
-Provide emotional support
-Communicate with each other regularly
-Try to have 'skinship' as often as possible
-Be more proactive acting on your desires
Very nice interview!!!
Kansaijin yappari chigau!!!💪
Asian women in general seem to not care about sex unless it's during dating, in which case it's used to just bait a man in. I can speak from 8 years of experience.
Isn't this an old video? I reamember watching it some years ago...
Love ur content 😊
私は日本人で夫がいますが、日本人男性、そして女性は外国人と比べて愛情を表現する事が苦手です。セックスの回数が少ない根本の原因はそこではないか？と思います。
私と夫はセックスレスでは無いですが、もっと積極的に夫から愛情表現をして欲しいですね。仕事から帰ればスマホを見て遊んでいますから。
I always thought because of the houses, the walls are paper thin you can hear everything, so how do the parents find quality time past the first kid
Love motels - spice things up a bit
Love hotels
Bro you think of Japan in the edo period . Those papers walls don't exist anymore
Kids sleep very deep, no problems with making out with the babaroonies.
17:10 those two girls completely ignored the question and started gushing over foreign men. Its game over in japan🤣
Probably just because Japanese are honest. I bet it's the same across the board - stalemate
I remember a long time ago, a young japanese man said "I won't married to someone i love" i asked why, he said "because marriage is an institution and a duty to your family and society, it needs balance and a partner that suitable for you, while love is very unpredictable and it can be ended anytime." I said, but you'll be happier if you married to someone you love. He laughed and said, "please you must differentiate between marriage and romance" .... Then years later, he indeed married to a woman who considered as a perfect match for him, while the one he loved or loves was left behind after years of long relationship. When Japanese men reach their 40, the pressure to get married is high, especially for those who has wealth and position, men consider an adult and upgrade his position in society if they get married. People will still congratulate you even if everybody knows what kind of marriage you have, a physical and fake marriage is still a marriage there. Btw...the Japanese man i know, said this to his long-term partner before they broke their relationship, "we're adults now let's grow up and do our duty to our family" i was baffled because the partner also said yes😅 i didn't bless the marriage, i didn't come to the wedding also, although I've known him for decades now.... I don't know why... it's really disturbing for me... I don't want to cut ties with them, but maybe ....I don't want to be involved in their fake life
Marriages in japan are not emotional, spiritual things it is pure materialistic and just a business.
Why can't you be happy for your friend's choices? The world doesn't revolve around you
The Japanese are very reserved and polite. I think that probably leads to a lot of distancing even in relationships. I find it difficult to imagine a loving touchy Japanese couple.
They may not be doing it with each other as a couple but with the size of the night trade somebody has to be paying for all those girls.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
If they keep pushing high qualification standard or else they'll turned into crazy cat-lady or crazy dog-man or the movie called "The 40 years old virgins"
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Seeing these interviews and work culture, I tend to think life in Japan may be miserable and lonely
It largely is, it would probably be best to marry another foreigner when or if you live there
Depends on the relationship... in this specific society, I can see how easy it is to get sight of intimacy with one's partner. Even in western society, the stress and work of daily life can make us lose sight of many things too, its hard to make time, one needs a very communicative, very understanding partner to continue being close, which a lot of women dont have that understanding partner, lot of factors.
What exactly is "skinship" ?
Physically touching. Things like hugging or casually touching a person's arm or kissing or other forms of physical contact are unusual in Japanese culture. But there's scientific evidence that physical touch builds emotional bonds, so they can kind of push themselves to do it, despite that. So calling it skinship is kind of a way of basically justifying something that is kind of culturally weird. Like it's weird to just touch a person or hold them for no reason, but its ok because it's skinship.
Physical affection.
"skinship" is Japanese English.
But Japanese AV industry is so developed... so i was thinking Japanese people would be open-minded when it comes to romantic relationship.
It's not 🚫
Is that where you get your kicks? Absolutely NOTHING ROMANTIC about Japanese porn.
There’s nothing romantic about av. It’s empty lust.
The AV industry is so popular BECAUSE the men aren't getting sex.
Didn't hear it mentioned but in Japan toddlers sleep in the same bed as their parents! It's no wonder that their numbers are low especially after first kid.
I must be Japanese.
People are becoming more practical about the costs related to sex inside and outside of marriage. Love isn't free. Job security, housing, marriage expenses, child-rearing costs, and uncertain retirement income all add to financial stress. These money issues create a constant barrier to being relaxed and carefree. If the connection is lacking in frequency, connection, and curiosity, you have to accept the hand you’ve been dealt.
You should live the way you want. Doesn't have to be about money. Problem is people copy what others do...need the house, two cars, study, study, study, dad working all hours.
Sorry this is so long:
Limited sex in Japan might be the results of how youth are expected to behave during school ages. My understanding is that dating is a NO NO at school ages. This is supported by parents.
I clearly understand why school ages youth dating is prohibited. Youth hormones take over and unprotected sex will occur. Having youth focus on education is very important and youth relationships can be a distraction as it is here in America. Yet, clearly having the sexes separated can imprint on the youth developing minds and attitudes that relationships are not important. It could be now as adults' relationships are not important, thus less marriages and worse less sex in marriages.
Could it be married couples that don’t have sex with their spouses have sex with others? I’ve seen videos on this topic. Sexless marriages would be normal to me if sex outside of the marriage is accepted by Japanese society. When I was stationed in Japan, I had an outing with some friends who brought their Japanese women who they dated. One of my friend’s girlfriend brought a girlfriend of hers along to keep me company since I didn’t have a date. Everyone knew I was married. Yet I was told that having a relationship outside of my marriage in Japan is OK. I was very shocked hearing this concept. I declined to have the friend as a date. Yet, I was still respectful to my companion, and we had a great time just as friends who just met. At the end of the day my companion said she wish Japan was more like me and not have dating & sex outside of relationships. Women accept the practice because they have no recourse. We stayed friends until I returned to America after my tour of duty. My understanding now is that women are now having sex outside their marriages in today’s Japan.
It would be good to see how Japanese, especially the dateless and unmarried, think of the scenario keeping the sexes apart during school ages. Maybe because it’s so normal that sex separation during the school age, most Japanese don’t think it’s an effect in adulthood. I personally think the youth separation could be an effect of why Japan’s sexless marriages are happening. As well as why young - middle age adults are relationship less. I also wonder what the older, 60+, think of the topic? Maybe a good idea for your next videos????
The Japanese government needs to make efforts to provide facilities such as permanent cheap housing especially in near tokyo or osaka and lots of job opportunities. Don't rely on debt but must try to be self-sufficient locally. local entrepreneurs and also teach people about economics properly in schools. Don't just save and reduce cost. but also trying to produce results such as facilitating young TH-camrs to be more productive. with a good economy, the population will increase
that's why soapland rumbles...
Meshida said that Japanese men don't have sex with their wives because the family is sacred, so instead both the husband and the wife have sex with other people, japanese logic...
Eh? That’s more comedy than reality. It was mentioned during the interviews in this video, after getting married and having kids, Japanese couples start to see each other less and less as romantic partners and just as “family”… like siblings or best friends with the wife now focusing almost exclusively on child rearing. Dressing to a certain imagined stereotype for a certain age, doesn’t help it at all. Referring to each other as “mother” and “father” instead of your given names (when talking to each other) because of the children doesn’t help things either.
@@jmbickham then is it the same in other countries, isn't it?
Excellent insight. Couldn't agree more.@@jmbickham
@@secret-mx9ry As a generalization? Maybe other in East Asian countries? As for Latinos and West Indians? Definitely not the same.
@@jmbickham but yes, it is the same in Europe and America example, just foreigners regularly like overmystify Japan, people are basically the same everywhere, here in Europe, where I live, marriages are the same as in Japan
I like these interviews!
The girl that was eating... there was more food on her face every time it cut back to her. I could not focus on anything else...
Him too...
I'll bet she swallows
No honey, no money.
My view of the Japanese is that far too many of them want to live in Tokyo, where land is limited, making housing both crowded and expensive. Women must work to pay the rent, and who would want to have three kids (the minimum needed to grow the population) when confined to a tiny apartment? Unless/until the Japanese give up on flocking to Tokyo, which holds about 30% of the population, Japan's population will continue to shrink. I have read that the amount of "livable land" for all of Japan is quite small due to its volcanic nature. Thus, it is natural that Tokyo continues to draw in a large percentage of the population. It's a vicious cycle that no government policy can reverse. Hence, Japan is doomed
You go where the jobs are, especially if you went to university to get a particular degree. If companies were in the rural areas, they'd get people that would want to live there. You are correct about the inhabitable land, but the current system doesn't help. There should be more than enough right now to move the needle a bit.
The average cost of a home in Tokyo is $300,000 USD. The average cost of a home in Toronto Canada is 1.25 million
@@dlewis9760 You’re an Internet piffle peddler, guy. You have no idea what you’re talking about
Please treat women with lots of love and respect...i find this is just ONE area where the japanese need to pay attention on high priority 🎉
ok what the hell is skinship? I need to google that...
Look at the cute young man talking about handsome men as if he is ugly. 😢 What kind of beauty standards do they have?!!
1. Could be due to comparatively lower levels of testosterone hormone in both males and females in Japan. Testosterone is vital for libido, muscle mass, beard hairs, bone mass, aggression, etc. 2. Coolidge effect- Same woman every time every day does not stimulate sexual stimulation and interest from man's side. Man biologically needs new sex partner on regular basis to keep him sexually active. This is called "Coolidge Effect" and this behaviour has also been confirmed in other mammals.
The Chinese and Indians must all have massive testosterone
Where does he put the camera?
You can also have protected sex, so the reason with the children is hypocritical. And the time lost going to the brothel is greater than the time from work to home, so the excuse of overworking doesn't hold either. The Japanese survives earthquakes, tsunamis, high school (this has a higher mortality rate than earthquakes), invests in cosmetics, looks, courts a woman for a long time and when he finally gets married, he gives up sex. Final verdict: no offense, but mental illness seems more plausible than the rest of the arguments with the cost of raising children, extended work, etc.
Basically, a kind of slow harakiri, without shortening the pain
A very good point to mention mental illness and a nice comparison with the harakiri!
I think mental illness would be taking it too far. It's mostly how they view marriage. In fact, each person sees couple's love differently.
For some, sex is important and they look for that as a priority, for others it is the emotional connection, for others it is both, etc.
It seems to me that for japaneses it is more of an "emotional connection + being a productive member of society", rather than enjoying sex as a couple and having children.
After being married, 26 years, if I don’t do the deed at least once a week, I go crazy lollllllllll……..also bring cheeky with one another, playful helps keep the flame alive.