Sisters know your rights in Islam. Dont let anybody persuade you to ignore those rights and protections that are given to you by our beautiful religion. I havent heard of any muslim man taking a second or even a third wife that has herself been married before or has children from a previous marriage. With the exception of Aisha (ra), all the Prophet's (pbuh) wives were either widowed or divorced. Brothers seem to be very selective about which parts of the Sunnah need to be followed. Being on benefits does not count as being able to provide for mutiple wives and their subsequent children. Noone even talks about the affect on the children of the first wife. The way that many brothers conduct second marriages is destroying families and scarring their children.
And this element of wht you say: " I havent heard of any muslim man taking a second or even a third wife that has herself been married before or has children from a previous marriage., " is the key point really isn't it? Idiots crap on about demographics as an excuse but there are only significantly more women than men in the 60 and upward categories. And I don't see many taking a 60 yr old as a second wife. The joke of this system is it isn't even fair to men, who if poor/ ugly/ stoopid are left without wives. I don't know why more men don't object.
@@IonCubekhanz islam does'nt. its a beautiful religion that teaches equality its just us , we only focus on the part that favours our particular interest.
@caticted8572 stats is a not particularly... it globally shows Muslim women ZERO performance ... their absence from politics absence from educational fields from fields of law... They just keep telling themselves they are Queens ...while they are psychological slaves of patriarchal system of Islam
the prophet didnt allow ali to get a second wife bcs it would break the prophet's heart seeing her daughter get hurt. so yes, we are allowed to refuse and it is a valid reason to divorce
If women are possessive of their husbands their labeled weak and insecure (men look down on them), but if men are possessive of their women, while they don't even want her to look at another man, they get praised. I find this a double standard. Isn't the monogamy clause in the contract a Hanbali matter?
According to science men cannot stay happy with only one wife at all ...men are naturally polygamous in nature Only weak men can . But neither normal male nor strong male can stay happy with only one wife at all... This is science and nature .. If u have problem then don't marry any one keep your possessiveness with you ...their are billions female in world.. no one need and wants stupid female like you who don't believe in nature and science 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
A woman is allowed to add the clause in her contract if he doesn’t want to agree with it then he can find someone who doesn’t mind him marrying again, simple as.
Nikah nama is civil contract not sahaba nabi sallallahu alaihi wasallam contract... Any one can break the clause at any time after nikah EXEPT Maher ..all clause can be broken if one is not agree with other after nikah ..so don't put such stupid conditions
@@hinakashir657 Mufti saab fatwa on this... this nikah nama is Civil contract ,it will end if one of two person is not agree with the conditions in present which is mentioned in past .... Fatwa on this and I will obey Mufti n scholars ,,not stupid blind public opinions like you n others ...
It takes a very secure women to not accept anything less then her rights and divorce a man who disrespects her especially because most of society chastises divorced women - thus it will Take a lot of security and bravery on a women to not accept such emotional abuse, add the clause and then act upon it if a man deceptively married her by agreeing to the clause and then broke it
@@Tamar-sz8oxWhen husband want his wife's presence and intimacy a working women can't meet the duties of a wife. Be a house wife and focus on husband and children and make family as first and foremost priority. A good wife will spend her most of the time in home and think about her husband and children if she isn't happy to be this kind of wife she isn't a marriageable women...
Ladies have no problem saying a high mahr is her right, but when it comes to man's rights feminists come out of their closets and say "secure your money". Hypocrite?
@@shadmani9687there is nothing wrong with a woman contributing to her family money wise eg new roof on the house $15,000 , new washer and dryer $3,000 , and it’s the responsible thing to do - having a retirement plan . It’s not a women vs man thing it’s common sense
Thank you. Same. I would not get married call it a insecurity if you will but my feelings wouldn’t change, I couldn’t fulfill my parts as a wife due to the jealousy and anger so before I go to hell because of someones dusty son, I would rather stay single and alone with 20 cats
@Thatsfine1998_ daily reminder to you my sister do not marry a muslim who was married before because they are not virgin keep yourself for a virgin man ask theme if they were married or had haram relationship and tell other girls and women to do the same. Muslim always marrys a virgin even if
@@mogainz since when are modern day men prophets and sahabas? You really think being YOUR wife is equal to being the wife of a Prophet? 🤣🤣🤣🤣 please … you thought you ate. İ would be willing to be the 600th wife if it was with one of our wonderful prophets but reality check: modern man ain’t no Prophet. 80% can’t even clean after themselves and you want me to be a devoted wife to someone who just wants to fulfil his sexual desires? Don’t ever shame a women and question her faith just because İ know my rights and know very well that İ have the right to choose to marry or stay single. What makes u think being the wifes of the likes of you is anything similiar to be a prophets wife and therefore İ should marry someone even if he wants more wifes. Those who want more wifes also don’t go looking for widows or divorcees. They want fresh virgin young women. They only follow the sunnah when it benefits them. Their intention is not “helpimg widows and oprhans by marrying and taking care of them”, they wanna cheat but can’t so suddenly the sunnah to have more wifes seems amazing to them. But just like you have the right to a second wife, İ have the right to stay single and not deal with mental torture
I was the latter, my ex married without my knowledge. I was informed by outside 3rd parties. HUMILIATED. I am still traumatized with the disposal of myself after 28 yeas of rmarriage. My heart hurts for my youngest daughter who has mostly been raised without her father as a constant presence.
I want a husband who himself wouldn't want to have 2nd wife. The reason shouldn't be me or any clause mentioned in the contract rather it should be his own will to not remarry. If these kinda men Don't exist then I would rather stay unmarried.
Firstly, put a clause that your husband cant take second wife in the nikah contract. If he does, he'll be punished on the day of judgement for breaching the contract also you can separate from him. A man who cant keep his word isn't worth it. If you can manage a co wife, no shame or problem in that.
The clause is only allowed for a woman to be able to divorce her husband should he remarry, otherwise she is not allowed to divorce just because he got another wife. Allah has allowed polygyny for men, therefore if a husband breaks contract and remarries it is not haram for him to do so. The clause in the contract is ONLY so that the woman is allowed to divorce him. It does not bind him to not being allowed to have another wife.
That's manipulation.First you want to keep a clause in marriage contract with out him agreeing completely then you want to hold him accountable for his natural inclination.Remember sister If Allah has ordained for your man to marry multiple times then no one can change the qadr of Allah.I know that it is not easy to be in a polygamous marriage but the fact is that it is still not Haram.Why you want your man to obey the stupid clause of marriage contract which you added in the contract based on your own insecurities when you don't want to take the bitter pill yourself.
You want your man to accept your demands where you fail to accept the decree of Allah.Society and media paints a rather horrible picture of polygyny because they don't want Muslims to grow as a community.If you are not obeying your husband do you still think you are pleasing Allah????
@@00aaaimam ahmad allowed it. It is a valid opinion based on the evidences of the quran and sunnah. She can stipulate it in the contract if she wants to 😂 literally every scholar agrees with this because it’s a valid opinion so stop being harsh with this sister. If YOU want a woman that accepts polygamy then go find that woman but do not destroy their rights or try to manipulate them by lying or making them feel bad when the scholars clearly tell us they’re allowed to stipulate that in the nikkah contract.
Polygamy is only mentioned once in a Surrah about women’s right. So if a woman doesn’t want to be in a polygamous marriage, she has the right to decline and, a man, as a Quwaam is not supposed to break his first family only to start a new one. What kind of Quwaam would that be? Although, men running after many women is a sign of weak men. Also, it’s Sunnah to add the clause to not allow the husbands to marry another in the wive’s lifetime, because it was our Prophet PBUH who added this clause to Fatima’s r.a marriage contract and forbade her husband from taking multiple wives. I think the scholars seem to have amnesia when it comes to that Sunnah.
Stupid girl.. Second and third wife can decline to become second wife without a doubt .. But first wife cannot decline ok..if he can justice between wives... So don't make your own islamic rules which comforts you.. And btw we have scholars also female scholars says.. A man can have 4 wives at a time.. And first wife cannot prevent hubby from taking second (if he is capable)... Capable in money and time..to do justice
"break his first" - nope it's the weak Iass breaking. "of weak men" - do you have proof or you insecure you can't handle it, nisa even recommend their husband to their cousins who can take shahada. "added this clause to Fatima’s" - he specified Abu Jahl's daughter not to marry Ali, maybe you forgot that, that's why it's a bit ambiguous!
@@falsesectslikeshiaarejudeo6543 so men who can’t control their lust for the sake of Allah are week. As I mentioned, women don’t have to accept polygamy. They can just add this clause to their marriage contract (Nikkah doc). Allah never ordered women to share husbands. The three most important women in Islam, known as the "Mothers of Islam," were not involved in polygamous marriages. Polygamy is NOT a pillar of Islam or article of faith so more of a reason not be continue this practice. End of discussion!
@@mizgenius3363 Asalam ALeikum sister, thank you for the reply, just want to clarify. "can’t control" - i agree, poor control can be week, may Allah guide us, but having a strong feeling isn't bad, it's sunnah to have big families & it does connect - no doubt. Prophet Muhammad peace and blessings be upon him ws with all 9 at one night sometimes, so we have to be responsible. "don’t have to accept polygamy" - maybe , I am still researching this, but they should be honest, many nisa do change their minds I have noticed. Anyways you seem like a nice sister. May Allah guide us. Just don't look down at polygynous brothers, in many places revert sisters can't find husbands and they do really care for them.
@@falsesectslikeshiaarejudeo6543 Walaikum Assalam brother, Although our Prophet PBUH did what had to be done to address social injustices, Islam encourages monogamy. Polygamy was allowed as a temporary solution to support mainly widows, orphans and women in general, however, even then Allah imposed difficult conditions. If those conditions couldn't be met, Allah advised men to marry ONLY ONE. Furthermore, in the Quran it is mentioned that creation of everything is in PAIRS (Verses 51:49, 78:6-16). PAIRS = TWO. Quran also mentions that marrying just one completes a man’s Deen. So it’s really sad to see weak men today abuse a verse that was only mentioned once is the entire Quran. Revert women are the most vulnerable, and such men convince them that they are only good for polygamy. With all due respect brother, if you are not a woman, you cannot speak for us if we change our minds or not. Also, you are asking me not to look down on polygamous brothers while brothers abuse the verse and call women insecure if they use their right not to accept polygamy like in this video. Isn’t that double standards?
I told my husband before marriage that I do not want to marry a polygamist because I don’t want a complicated marriage. He said that he only ever wants me. He knows that moment he talk about have another wife I’ll leave him right away. For me if my husband is considering another wife it means he doesn’t love and respect me anymore.
Marriage in Islam is a civil contract, nothing more. Allah recognizes the fact that it is female nature to be hypergamous. In the vast majority of the cases, the man is the provider and higher earner in the relationship. A man provides for the material well-being and safety of his family. The woman makes the home and takes care of his physical needs. If either party neglects their role, then the other can and should leave. No sense being in an unhappy situation. "Love" as defined today is a purely commercialized Western concept and has led to a great deal of unhappiness in women. Yes, if he promised not to take a second wife and you are fulfilling your role and then he goes back on his word, leave him. But if he wants a second wife because while he is doing his part, but you are not doing your part, then you can still leave him as that is your right in Islam. But he would not be wrong in taking a second wife at that point.
@@STOICSAYS985The answer is a clear no. If you want more it's clear you don't love them with whole heart. You weren't created to be public toilets. Don't bring Almighty to cover your filth.
And if you fear that you may not be just to the orphans, then you may marry whom you please of the women, two, three, or four. But if you fear being unfair, then only one, or what your right hand possesses, for that will make it less likely that you act unfairly. 4:3
To all the sisters who are worried about a man taking a 2nd wife…..how many men do you know personally who have actually done this??? I guarantee you can count them on your fingers. Stop worrying about something that most likely won’t happen. It’s not as easy and fun as it sounds to take a second wife. Can you take a 2nd job on the same level as your first job? Even with the potential of earning double most still can’t do it.
If he breaks the clause or cheats on his wife then she has every right to seek divorce. He clearly was a deceptive person and not a moral person whose looking to deceive people or break clauses and marry on the wrong pretenses. Don’t marry a guy that can’t agree to the nikkah clauses you have every right to and don’t marry women that require clauses that you’re not man enough to abide by
if every woman comes with a clause like that then the men will be foreced to agree to it. We don't need to tell our wife if we married again. why should a man go though more harm abiding by something that will only cause more fitnah for himself.
@@sdiasvet maybe for you or other young sisters and week ones, but many sisters appreciate quality over quantity and talk about nika when they don't study and aren't even ready.
This life is temporary, and treating it like it is forever will create unnecessary problems. There is no guarantee of any relationship succeeding and people change over a lifetime. Best thing to do is make life easy for others and Allah swt will make your life easy…
I mean emotionally usually, it creates jealousy and it takes a long time for me to really understand the wisdom of Allah s.w.t and because I came from a background where my mother is divorced because of second marriage. But truly, Allah s.w.t is full of wisdom and he had given so much right to a woman that it is beautiful, so I am going to accept when Allah s.w. t allows polygamy for men as long as he has not transgress the right of of his wife as a woman. If he transgresses, then he should release the wife. It is very difficult to digest it because women are jealous in nature but Allah s.w. t loves you more than your husband so there must be some reason why your husband is married to another woman also and it will benefit us if we sabr. ❤
Men are also very jealous but nisa do like a brother who other nisa also like... I find if the wife respects the man she will let him lead and respect his choice. Nisa who don't respect husbands, unless it's for din related issues, tend to be bad mothers.
@@falsesectslikeshiaarejudeo6543Wrong. You act like all husbands are good people. There are men who are bad leaders and providers. A mother leaving that man is a good decision as she does not want to raise her kids around evil.
Shame on everone and everything that oppresees women with Polygamy, Child marriages, FGM, Sex-slavery, Half inheritances and credibility, Marital violence, Denial of right to education (hence career and financial self-reliance) and leadership roles in contemporary world.
Marriage isnt a problem. The people involved in the marriage are the problem. If both men and women understood what a Muslim marriage is and they practiced it, then women wouldn't be complaining about polygamy. Also, why would you encourage women to not get married? We arent atheists or agnostics. We have standards and morals.
@@samueldavids3704 since you know all about it can you explain to me what good Muslim Marriage is then. And why women woudnt be complaining about polygamy if they understood
@@TheNiceOne_ You don't need him to get answer to your question. You go through the comment you will see how women are groomed in Islam. One thing I want to learn from Islam is How to create people who will blindly follow you. All regions have foolishness in holy books .But they don't specify how hypnotize and make people follow blind faith.
It just comes down to the question why was I not enough? I get that they are allowed but what more could that other person give you? Why go for another marriage? or do us women look at this on an emotional level?
It all comes to money, this polygamy thing is all about money being used as a power tool to use against the poorer party, it has nothing to do with emotions or men's needs, that's just a man's made excuse because it happens that the system over history gave them more access to money than their wives, what if he's the one that's not enough for her? Most of the time she can't say anything because she will be judged by him and everyone else as a lustful and not a "pure woman" and she can't get a divorce without a big reason since she's not financially independent, they say women that desire multiple men are not real women but men that desire multiple women are normal men, seems very convincing when most women are poorer than their husbands (hence more desperate), where's the proof that a rich woman wouldn't change a husband for a new one every 6 months? Because these women exist they just don't publicly announce it because of the social stigma about the female desire to try new partners (even in halal) every ones in a while same as the man
Why!Why! you man don't want to understand that we women can't share our husband with another woman...we women can share everything but not my husband... We just can't stand it!and you man said that called it jealousy!! NO IT'S NOT JEALOUSY.. You will never understand us and our pain 😭
You can't stop your husband from wanting another woman, but you can get a divorce. All souls have the right for peace, to choose what kind of company befit their hearts. "O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will." Quran, 4:19
WOWWW...why we need ulma muftis if we have to understand Qur'an ahdees on our own benefits... You can get divorce khula but but cannot force for divorce..... If you force for khula if husband is dealing good with both wives.. Then your asking of divorce mistake will lead to to hell fire 🔥 and you will not smell fragrance of Jannah insha Allah
@@usamasohail3294but today there 1-2% people who can treat both wives well,,,mostly they forget about others when they get new,,Also its her rights too ,,If he cant fulfill her needs after 2nd wife ,,if she suffers at night,,then why cant she divorce and find someone who will accompany her in the night!???
@@HelloPeople666 stupid read clearly... I said if he can justice between wives..then no women has right to take khula... And by the way .. and justice betwenn wives will be according to shariah law.. Shariah law demands .. Right of night sharing is 1/1 for each wife.. Also necessary expenses will be count in justice.. In simple words.. A men need to spend 1 night with each wife.. And need to give max 10k inr for each wife...(this is in tafseer of verse I have read)) Thats called justice.. justice is also simple.. Some cheap and wicked women make false statements on justice .. Like that.. 1)Men has to produce same amount of babies from both wives.. 2)Same number of inter course with wives.. 3)same amount of Maher .same amount of time in seconds.. Same amount of feelings with both wives.. Same amount of money for both wife Even is wives has 5 kids or 1 kid... This is false statements made by feminists.. Which is not in Qur'an ahdees Nor in fiqah.. No ulma Mufti says such conditions which is made by feminists . So don't bark men cannot do justice.. And why you women won't bark when a man is not deal with 1 wife.. No women ever complaint and bark ,, if hubby treat single wife badly rudely.. You women only complaint when it is POLYGAMous?? It shows you women only want gender equality.. In short you women want men also settled on one wife ..even men not agree on this..and they can treat all wives equally.. . ridiculous thinking by women This shows your sick mentality and wicked intention and feminism mind.. Go and bark on those with same energy.. Don't be hypocrites women ok.. Same number of In simple words...in normal'conditions
Asalaamu Alaikum w w even Allah mentiond in quraan surah nisa verse 3 , Marry 2.3.4. But Marriying one is good for you .then why you guys want which is not good for you ?
the verse it self says 2, 3 or 4 then it mentions 1 last. marrying more women is better and more rewarding. marrying one is also reccommended for those who cannot afford more than one
@@shadowstorm5261 It depends on your ability, the brothers adn sisters should focus on learning in the order the sahabas did and insha Allah things will be easy!
“O Allah, make my religion easy for me by virtue of which my affairs are protected, set right for me my world where my life exists, make good for me my Hereafter which is my resort to which I have to return, and make my life prone to perform all types of good, and make death a comfort for me from every evil.”
The best advice I've ever heard on this issue ist this: If a woman does not want a poligamous marriage, because it would break her, she should marry a monogamous man. And they do exist Alhamdulillah. And a man who wants multiple wives, should only marry women who are able to accept polygamy. This would save everyone a lot of trouble and heartache. Such a simple and logical solution. MashaAllah
Many men always follow their desire, no matter what the wife did to please them, if their heart already full of shahwa to other women. It will not work 😶🌫️
@@KadershaN-ou2sjand allah swt also told you have control on your desire, that is why, we fast in the month of ramadan to get sabr on multiple things, you can definitely control your lust if you want to, both men and women
It is not insecurity. It is an expression and an upholding of the woman's interests, which she has the right to do. If a woman absolutely doesn't want a polygynous husband, then she MUST put the skids on polygyny by inserting a clause into the marriage contract right at the very beginning forbidding the husband to marry any other women while he is married to her. Because if she doesn't, then after marriage he is absolutely free to marry other women if he wants to, and she doesn't have any authority to stop him. It's no use her being hysterical that her husband has married another woman if she didn't stipulate a condition into the marriage contract in the first place that states that he can't marry any other women if he marries her.
Include into your marriage contract that he can't marry anyone else. And if he still wants to have more wives... Dear women in this world leave that poor excuse of human being and let him go wherever he wants. Divorce that filth and start your own life. Create your own beautiful days alone or with someone else. It's your choice.
Marriage contract is invalid if it goes against islamic rules ....said by lawyers and scholars both..so don't bark about this paper contract I know your butt n ass will burn by this.. But no one cares... Truth is truth...
@@SK-gm7ge STFU! Don't even try to manipulate me. I am educated and smart enough to not fall for your cheap tricks. If he commits Zina he should get punished by Allah and go to hell. I don't care about cheaters. He's a man, a human with a brain and mind of his own, he has conscious, he can choose to do right or wrong. If he commits sin it's his own choice and he has to take the punishment for it. Also I'll leave the cheater too. So.. Get a life and get a brain.
@@usamasohail3294what about the man????? How quick you are with a flippant response if a woman kicks the man to the curb! Strong women make men insecure. Men who have multiple wives do not marry women who are strong, secure and independent. They look for someone who will be totally dependent on the husband monetarily so he isn't challenged!
If a man plans to get another wife if he wants to but if a wife is completely against it then they shouldnt get married. Everyone have dealbreakers so we should go over them before getting married.
The clause is only allowed for a woman to be able to divorce her husband should he remarry, otherwise she is not allowed to divorce just because he got another wife. Allah has allowed polygyny for men, therefore if a husband breaks contract and remarries it is not haram for him to do so. The clause in the contract is ONLY so that the woman is allowed to divorce him. It does not bind him to not being allowed to have another wife.
If my husband wants to marry a second wife I think it wouldn’t be a good idea at all… because I’m sure I will search for another man who can only have eyes for me, and give me all of his attention and care… my husband marrying another woman would definitely make me sin … because I’m only human, I’m not perfect and if I’m not happy at home I would look for something new. I’m quite possessive and that’s how Allah created me, I’m not capable of sharing and I accept myself like that
Well that’s what I am already doing. He hasn’t even married second but he is talking about a second wife in jokes and I took it seriously. I have another man and he loves me so much. We are planning to be together till the day we die and meet in heaven InshaAllah.
Cost of living is so high at the moment and there is a housing crisis. I think it would be very difficult to do a second marriage and provide equality between the two now.
The prophet Muhammad SAW was married to Khadijah RA for 25 yes and never even thought of having a second wife not until when she breathed her last yet we are told His manpower was equivalent to that of 100 men
You are very right abt being a good husband first. I have experience in that field and I would like to tell all the young ladies out there: The best husband is a loving, supportive husband who has only you as a wife The second best is a husband who is loving and supportive but has another wife The third best is a husband who is not loving and supportive but you are his only wife. Actually, this is not a good husband. And the worst husband is he who is not loving and supportive and has another wife on top of that. And ladies, please, if and when you marry a man who is already married: It is by no means permissible for you to try and get rid of the first wife. This would be the meanest thing you can do, but I have seen it again and again.
Wrong. I can love multiple woman. Love isn't binded to one person. You can love multiple woman, you love your father and mother, brothers and sisters, cousins, friends and pets etc. Love is abundant, not limited. Edit : Spelling
@@ironbutterfly12Cherrypicking to make your point. Allah also says in the Quran you can marry up to 4 and that no man will be in pairs in Jannat. This is a typical SIGN (Shame, Insult, guilt and Need to be right) language from feminists. When women dont like facts they will try to shame you on insult you or try to make you feel guilty or have the need to be right when she knows she is wrong.
A woman is “insecure” because she stipulates in her marriage contract that she doesn’t want her husband to take a second wife? Why don’t we spin this. Say a woman was allowed to marry 4 men, you think her husband would be Ok with her taking a second husband? Yeah that’s what I thought.
In such case men should also be allowed to write clause that "in unfortunate event of divorce, all divorce proceedings must be according to SHARIAH LAWS and NOT existing Government Laws".
i think the matter is being taken out of proportion lol ... islam allows polygny doesn't encourage it also its not allowed in some circumstances.. for instance if a man is stuggulign to provide for his wife and kids, would the Islamic court allow him to marry a second wife???? both parties need to discuss beforehand what they want and prefer and find someone like minded... the issue is men don't even want the women who are okay with polygamy but they want the women are not okay so it feels like a game to them. its ego problem
I have a great amount of respect for Mufti, however it isn't insecurities. If a woman love you she likely won't want to share in your holy bond. The way Allah, swt made us in the beginning is perfection everything after was to be a mercy.
Allah azza wa jal knows what is best for his creation. One of the problems with polyandry is that how would the woman know who is the father of each of her children?
@@blackbeautifulandsmart2849 DOES IT REALLY MATTER WHO THE FATHER IS. WHEN THERE IS ONE MOTHER. WOMEN SHOULD HAVE MULTIPLE HUSBANDS AND RULE THE WORLD 🌍
Sheikh answered the question in a very diplomatic way, understandably so because of the influence of western ideologies like feminism on our sisters. But before you put such a clause, where does it end? What if a guy wants a clause that she must be a virgin, or never had a boyfriend, or has never been touched by a non-Marham, or intimacy 24/7 for the rest of the marriage, or she must quit her job or education, or she can never leave the house, or she must change phones and get rid of her past life. where do these clauses end? This is something that once opened, cannot be closed back. I believe Allah has already perfected this religion for us, which is why no addition can be made into the religion. And we have to be careful in trying to make Haram what Allah has made halal, which usually leads to the reverse of people making halal what Allah has made Haram. Be careful of following the footsteps of shaitan. Jazzakallah
Please raise your hand in the comments section if you are a qualified scholar who has spent and dedicated their life to studying and preserving the sciences of Islām.
I don’t understand why a lot of the men in the comment section are against the whole idea of the wife divorcing them because they do not want their husband to find a second wife. If they want to divorce their husband, even if it’s discouraged, it’s still allowed. Not quite sure why that bothers men who aren’t even married to begin with. If the wife divorces their husband over this matter… i mean, you’re still going to have another wife at the end of the day. Besides, you can just find yet another wife if the first leaves, is that not right? You’re allowed up to four wives. So many women on this earth, and yet you’re going to find some who don’t want to be in a polygamous relationship, contract or not. Wooptydoo
Unless there is a helpless situations there is no need to get married to another women infact it will obstruct spiritual progress . Mufti menk and rest of these mainstream preachers only speak nice words but they are void of sprirtiuality . Its a shame .
I guess u didn't hear what mufti menk said he doesn't knows the situation of the individual who asked the question. If u want further information go and pls contact with ur local mufti and find the whole fiqh behind it. And stop disrespecting scholars they've sacrificed their Dunya just for Allah taala and we are so possessed about our Dunya that we are rarely able to give 20-30 mins to our Salah. Jazakallah khairan
Theres no reason a man needs to marry again, we don’t have the same situations as the people the past. There arent more women in world and men arent dying in wars more then women. So a man doesnt have a good enough reason to marry more than once other than “I can” and “Allah allows me”. Allah is not saying you have to marry four but you can.
@@HA-jq1mu stupid foolish person... Female have periods of 8 days in month .. every month .. 2 days she goes to her parents home every month... 1,2 days for health problems.. In fact wife physically available for 20 days only for his husband.. That too when she isn't pregnant and not sick.. Out of 30 days wive physically available for his husband is only 20 days .. So what can a man do in those 10 days when wife physically not available,, he keep masturbation and using sex dolls but no second wife blah balha... If she is pregnant then husband has to masturbation for 5-6 months ... Do you have any other option than second wives ??
Hahaha What a joke! U said nikah obstructs sprituality! Isnt this a joke! We neither live in churches nor in temples Neither we are taught to do so, Our family life,our dealings ,our participation in all social issues Is the actual message of islam.... There is no sprituality If we dont follow this normal life system .... BCOZ we are humans not robots nor machines ... We need love and support And we should give love and support to others And fulfil all duties as a servant of ALLAH SWT this is sprituality
I agree it's about insecurity, but not on the part of the woman. It shows that she is expressing doubts as to whether the man she's chosen can provide security and can actually be loyal. If you feel a man is besotted with you and won't choose anyone else, then you won't put in the clause because there is no need to. But if then, such a person brings a second wife later, you will simple divorce them, because a second wife was never on the table for you. The point of the clause, presumably in the mind of the women, is to protect their marriage, but whether or not the clause is in there, this woman will divorce that man if he ever does introduce a second wife. If you're questioning whether to put this clause in there, I would say seriously question yourself on who you are choosing to marry, and what is it you are observing in his character that is making you want to put in such a clause.
The more possessive and insecure we first wives are, while giving our husbands no peace at home, no proper food, comfort or sex, we force our husbands to do Zina. So we first wives are at fault ! Also, if a man has been promiscuous before marriage, it is blund to happen after marriage too ! So what Allah has permitted, who are we and why should we dare to stop our husbands from marrying again while remaining married to us as their first wives ?! Alhamdulillah I am happy and we wives are like sisters to one another with no ounce of comeptition amongst us or jealousy, envy or hatred against each other. Most importantly my husband and our families with us two wives are at peace with each others, even the kids and we all respect one another. Alhamdulillah.
Ma Shaa Allah good for u. But that doesn't mean that it's the same case with everyone. Some men also do injustice to their first wife thinking that it's their right. In some cases even is first wife is very understanding, gives proper food, comfort and even pleasure and doesn't even force her husband even then without any valid reason they leave their first wife and children behind following their lust for other women ,not only multiple marriages they do zina also even if their "first " Wife is pious. That doesn't mean that they r right in any way.
No one can force the man to be unfaithful, marriage is a 2 way street, a real man would take it to his wife up front as a discussion if he felt a need wasn't being met. No need to put the blame all on yourself
My dear sister I salute u And i love u from bottom of my heart Bcoz what u said Its not only a line... Its sign of ur Greatness and uniqueness .... Whether u r first wife or second But i salute u for ur positive and GOD FEARING attitude .... U know before ten years My thinking regarding second marriage of a man was also bad! Bcoz of little knowledge , Or bcoz of the social image Or bcoz of me my and just mine world type thoughts.. But when i.growup and i experienced realized the a reality of second nikah, WALLAHI I TOO DECIDED TO marry a married man Bcoz this great sunnah has A very very beatiful and great message in it! And the fact is that it has 99% benefits only 1% sideeffects Thats is of first wife's sadness or ego... But if husband loves her,respects her,protects her,the way islam tells him... Im 100% sure she can forget all that ... But unfortunately we considered its 1% bad effects and forgets 99% great effects
@@Veilorah what an uneducated statement. Amazing how you dare to lie to justify the worse of your religion. I won't even reply to such a ridiculous belief
@@faras010 yeah Muslims alway reply with this poor argument. but then it applies to women's too : better to have several husbands than several boyfriends ? Your ridiculous religion is based on discrimination.
@@jasral7767This is video isnt useful for you, inshallah when you find the path and become a Muslim then these fatawa will be needed may Allah guide you
@aurelion3 family was. Great grandad put all his children in different religion. After he found out certain Muhammed mole sted his wife at age of 6, then ra ped her at 9. He also slept with his daughter-in-law. Slaves. A dead wo man . Killed 600 Jewish men in 1 days. Sent assasin's to kill. They killed as she breast fed. Looted, killed, robbed. Great grandad said proph et Mu ham mad truly is a evil man & so are the people that truly follow him. Don't pray for me, I will pray for you.
Noting to do with insecurity just lack of trust. It’s simple if the husband wants another wife and you have no confidence in his ability to be fair equally divorce him; no body has a right to force you to live in conditions less than what Allahs has ordained for you. It’s beyond me why men would invite such high risk of sin from not living up to the expectation that the Prophet has set out for men which are so high to begin with you don’t even have time for more than one wife. I barely see 1 out of ten passably happy marriages in monogamous society, what hell of a drama it must be for non monogamous communities. Advice to men: pray more; do more charity, focus on ahira not sex with different women.
I wont encourage any women to divorce unless it's a serious case like beating for exemple, we wont advice to divorce just because a man did a second marriage that is halal for him and i dont think de divorce will be valid in this case
@@xtaz666I will encourage every woman to divorce if the husband wants a second marriage. No one deserves to be treated as a useless piece of wood laying near someone's feet.
@@xtaz666 I disagree, because there is a hadith sahih saying a woman is allowed to get a divorce even if she has no other reason than not being able to live with her husband. Meaning he's a good and righteous person, but she doesn't like him as her husband. Divorce is allowed but nevertheless not recommended or liked. Every couple has to find the best way for themselves. Maybe you would think you would want a divorce in case of a second wife immediately and later in your life find it acceptable. Or the other way round, when it happened you find it unacceptable. Wa Allahu alim.
Prophet Mohammed sav did not endorse Ali Ra to get a second wife beside Fatima. It is said that Ali ra wanted to marry but the Prophet sav showed his discontent.
This picture is not good of a husband and two wives in a setting like this, because polygamy is not a triangle. It's H AND W H AND W 2 different separate, private relationships. It's not a three some. . NO H W W
I think a woman should not break another womans home n get married...there are enough single men..leave the married men alone..just coz women are available men have choices.
@@TA-bo5bc I don’t like that ‘! Mind ur own business! This comment is for my fiancé to see! I hate such horny men who don’t adjust with one ☝️’ and I know it’s allowed to marry and be in polygamy! U should really mind ur own business
It is the case that it is permissible for a man to have up to 4 wives under prescribed conditons e.g. equal measure for all 4 wives etc. So why the discusson about a clause in the nikah. I do not get it - should the first wife not know this is permissible? Therefore the point about insecurity?
and so the breakdown of society. All humans, male and female, young and old, everyone has a duty to society, to nurture goodness and the greater purpose. Subhan Allah. This is the true path of righteousness bestowed upon us by Allah Almighty through the messengers / prophets SAW and the Quran
@@urmixbyaagkool1863 bro nikah nama is civil contract not sahaba nabi sallallahu alaihi wasallam contract... Their is no such marriage nikah naama in sahaba's time... And none of sahabaiya stop sahaba from 2,3, 4 marriage,, it our women and sick uneducated women who make such clause and rules and point out such points which only benifits them... And you know what...if 2nd marriage is bad thing why should any girl or female want to become 2nd wife of someone ,,why such females available for second marriage in our society, ,,if second wife is bad thing... The truth is only first wife's loss ?not women loss..
@@usamasohail3294 the litmus test for both the woman and man is if the choices they make are in line with the teachings of the true path in life, to fulfil this life's journey for the greater good and society i.e. according to Islam. Then nobody can go wrong. Any selfish choice or made contrary to Islam as the true guidance and purpose of life will always fail
Shouldn’t the husband know that each wife requires her own house and full financial equity, plus he is required to assist with multiple households and raise not just father the children? Most men don’t even help in their one household let alone multiple plus community work and charity. Permission is irrelevant if men are not capable of honoring all their responsibilities. Prophet saws advised best marry only one.
It is also a sunnah to take caof wifes feelings like he never got married to ne 1 at the time of khadeejah ra. agree later all his marriages were situational or for growth of islam....
I think any woman has a lawful right to demand that her husband cannot marry another woman. It should be permissible only if both sides agree. No matter what clause, decree or fatwa is in place. We should stop this nonsense at one point.
If there is 4 husband then who is the father? Men and women are not the same. Why cant a wife protect husband during dangerous situation? Why dont wife give mahr and not husband? Do you ever ask these questions.
Very politically correct answer sheik, like a politician, in todays world it’s better for the women to put the clause, to be safe , it’s unfair for the women , But Allah knows best
Oh really?? Did the sahabiyat liked the other wives their husbands had??? The wives of the prophet Mohammad did not like each other...go and read Surah Attahreem and other hadis. Plus when you have a look of how Allah's allowed polygamy and made rules for it. You will see that it is all based on ghe woman rejecting to be part of it, and the rules were made to minimize her rejection as much as possible. First Allah says in the Quran that the man who will have more than one wife will never be just even if he tried hard to be...this is one major reason for the woman to refuse being one of 4 or 3 or 2 wives, so Allah mentioned in the Quran one negative thing that will surely applies to any woman who agrees to stay in such marriage (Islam does not force her to go through this). In addition to that, Allah did not allow a man to marry a woman and her sister at the same time...because for sure they will have a negative feeling towards each other. Allah made it a rule for a man to provide for each wife an independent house....open your eyes. Unfortunately Muslim men these days are narcissist...they use guilt to trap the woman and prevent her from using her right to refuse and leave
The women in these comments are ridiculous. It's not your choice ladies, it's a man's right and saying you'll leave him is not a good idea... The hadith says that the woman who seeks divorce from her husband for no valid reason won't even smell the fragrance of paradise.
I understand this is a sensitive topic for womenfolk. But please Please do your research before giving fatwas. No you are not allowed to divorce your husband just because he marries a second wife. If he does not give your rights as a wife like right to maintenance, equal share of time among the wives, fair treatment etc then only you can demand divorce. Demanding divorce without valid reason is a big sin as there's a hadith : "If a woman asks her husband for a divorce, for no reason, then the smell of Paradise is forbidden for her". (At-Tirmidhi narrated it. He said this is a hasan hadith. Sunan At-Tirmidhi, 1187.). And about prophet (saw) not wanting Ali to get married again, that's true but do you know Ali had a slave with home he had intimate relations and prophet knew this and gave his approval? Hadith: The Prophet (ﷺ) sent `Ali to Khalid to bring the Khumus (of the booty) and I hated `Ali, and `Ali had taken a bath (after a sexual act with a slave-girl from the Khumus). I said to Khalid, "Don't you see this (i.e. `Ali)?" When we reached the Prophet (ﷺ) I mentioned that to him. He said, "O Buraida! Do you hate `Ali?" I said, "Yes." He said, "Do you hate him, for he deserves more than that from the Khumlus." (bukhari 4350)
If man can get more than 1 wife , woman can get more then one husband too ,it is simple fair really . Why make it so difficult ,why woman has to accpet this creepy rule ?
(9:65) Should you question them what they were talking about, they would certainly say: “We were merely jesting and being playful.” Tell them: “Was it Allah and His revelation and His Messenger that you were mocking?” surah-taubah
Then How will she come to know who is real father i will give you a advice that if you don't want to share your husband make a agreement with him before marriage instead of mocking.
Is it normal not to feel jealousy towards a second wife? To be honest i am aware that it is Allah's command and that's it. Men are capable of loving more women at the same time but they will always love one more than another but they will not show that to them they will treat them equally in rights and responsibilities. Therefore i would not feel any jealousy for the second wife. Because men are wired like that they can love more wives and i accept that.
... ALLAH has the power to bring a man to his knees ... weak and unable to function ... paralysis ... death ... the first wife must condone within her heart ... only ALLAH knows her heart ... if her heart suffers, then her husband will be punished accordingly ...
Islam forbids to mock other people infact its haram and also to inflict harm and bully others is haram because its a bad work that makes you earn bad deeds Inequity and oppression is haram Surat al-kahf ( (18:87) He said, "We will punish that one of them who will commit iniquity: then he shall be returned to his Lord and He will inflict on him a grievous torment:) Even to be unfair to yourself is haram ,Surat al-amran (And those who, when they commit an immorality or wrong themselves [by transgression], remember Allah and seek forgiveness for their sins - and who can forgive sins except Allah? - and [who] do not persist in what they have done while they know.) So its completly illogical after all of that to say that god encourages the opression of women , the verse that says hit women is falsely understood for arabic is a complicated language and one word can means many things (ضرب) means hit, multiply, boycott, and move far way from and the last meaning is the most logical one because in the following verse god speaks about reconciling between spouses and that believers should help them fix their relationship but it will be weird to say that after you hit your wife to make her obey you must make others help you reconcile with her like dude no one will help you with that ofc ! 🤦♀️ Enjoyment of earthly desires (money,women,..etc) in this temporary life is a sin and its also a test for believers , suart al amran ( Beautified for people is the love of that which they desire - of women and sons, heaped-up sums of gold and silver, fine branded horses, and cattle and tilled land. That is the enjoyment of worldly life, but Allah has with Him the best return) So women are a part of the earthly desires of this temporary life so it wont make sense for god to say to men to stay away from the temporary earthly desires of this life time (women) in one verse and will tell them in other verses to go after them in the form of (polygamy, seggs slavery,..etc ) Also money ofc is part of the temporary desires of this life time so it wont make sense for god to forbid men from pursing temporary earthly desires (money) and then will tell these same men you should take more than women in inheritence (earthly temporary desires) beside god hates greediness and unfairness so as a result it wont be logical if god tell men to behave in such manner ! These behaviours( polygamy, seggs slavery, overtaking inheritence and over powering women and the weak )were acts of the infidels and islam came to fix them but those who have disease in their hearts wont change and wont follow god's path correctly and may go to the extent of altering the interpetation of god's words to earn that temporary earthly pleasure ( women,money,..etc )so its people not islam ! Al amran(It is He who has sent down to you, [O Muhammad], the Book; in it are verses [that are] precise - they are the foundation of the Book - and others unspecific. As for those in whose hearts is deviation [from truth], they will follow that of it which is unspecific, seeking discord and seeking an interpretation [suitable to them]. And no one knows its [true] interpretation except Allah. But those firm in knowledge say, "We believe in it. All [of it] is from our Lord." And no one will be reminded except those of understanding.) I really hope this will help you and will open your eyes to the truth ❤
Assalamualaikum, 5 months before my husband got another marriage & gifted property to his brother, without inform me,and not provide any maintenance i have 8 yrs daughter. can u please tell us.
@@HA-jq1munot always the advise to give u know I’m sure she knows that. But if he’s not providing and she struggling what do u think will happen to her after.?
@@MessiWorldCup-th2de she can marry someone else or go back to her father. There’s no point being married to a person who doesn’t provide for his family
We live in wild times. Its hard enough to get one wife these days let alone two. Marriage has gotten lot harder even though its not supposed to be that hard. Modern women are influenced from western values have become more entitled, expecting everything from their men when they have nothing to offer in return. They prefer career over marriage. Parents use their children as bargaining chips to get more dowry from each other and seal the deal with the highest bidder. Marriage now has become a business where bride and groom have a price tag . Monetary benefits are more important than character.
FEAR ALLAH AKHIN, title is misleading I thought u meant can a wife physically stop his husband etc THE QUESTION asked to mufti Menk was different tho It was about adding a clause in the contract
Marrying someone same age like your daughter I finding it unbelievable and at the same time talking about it just to mock your actual wife is a terrible thing specially Some man always say I have a right to marry 4 wives and you don’t pray 5 times a day 😂😂😂
Most women against polygamy are either already married or still young. Go check up on women in their late 30s and 40s, I've seen staunch feminists who swore never to "settle", settle down as a 3rd or 4th wife. Maybe when you fall into such a situation, you will understand the hikmah and wisdom behind Allah's decree
Always been an emotive subject however we must always fear Allah azza wa jal in all matters. So much emotion and comments based on people’s opinion only, never making any reference to Quran and Sunnah. Be careful with your comments as often it is better to remain silent that make a comment that is a Bid’ah or haram.
Please can someone answer why not mention Surah 66 At-Tahrim? : "O Prophet! Why do you prohibit ˹yourself˺ from what Allah has made lawful to you, seeking to please your wives? And Allah is All-Forgiving, Most Merciful." ... "Perhaps, if he were to divorce you ˹all˺, his Lord would replace you with better wives who are submissive ˹to Allah˺, faithful ˹to Him˺, devout, repentant, dedicated to worship and fasting-previously married or virgins."
But in our culture men don't give same rights to his wife's just the say that Allah give him wright 4marrigs but Allah told that if u don't able to give the same right to each wife u have to do just one
Sisters know your rights in Islam. Dont let anybody persuade you to ignore those rights and protections that are given to you by our beautiful religion.
I havent heard of any muslim man taking a second or even a third wife that has herself been married before or has children from a previous marriage.
With the exception of Aisha (ra), all the Prophet's (pbuh) wives were either widowed or divorced. Brothers seem to be very selective about which parts of the Sunnah need to be followed.
Being on benefits does not count as being able to provide for mutiple wives and their subsequent children.
Noone even talks about the affect on the children of the first wife. The way that many brothers conduct second marriages is destroying families and scarring their children.
And this element of wht you say: " I havent heard of any muslim man taking a second or even a third wife that has herself been married before or has children from a previous marriage., " is the key point really isn't it?
Idiots crap on about demographics as an excuse but there are only significantly more women than men in the 60 and upward categories. And I don't see many taking a 60 yr old as a second wife.
The joke of this system is it isn't even fair to men, who if poor/ ugly/ stoopid are left without wives. I don't know why more men don't object.
Islam favours men ... yes you are right
@jezza1724
You must be MCP or a Helsinki Syndrome afflicted Chicken from KFC Club
@@IonCubekhanz islam does'nt.
its a beautiful religion that teaches equality
its just us , we only focus on the part that favours our particular interest.
@caticted8572 stats is a not particularly... it globally shows Muslim women ZERO performance ... their absence from politics absence from educational fields from fields of law... They just keep telling themselves they are Queens ...while they are psychological slaves of patriarchal system of Islam
the prophet didnt allow ali to get a second wife bcs it would break the prophet's heart seeing her daughter get hurt. so yes, we are allowed to refuse and it is a valid reason to divorce
selfish still people follow him
@@sram5308 yes Offcourse till end of time.....!!!
Where it is written prophet does not allow?
@@muhammadsaqibkhan3294 you didnt even take the time to do research may allah guide you. the sources of my claim: bukhari 5230, 3729 and muslim 2449
@@batoolfatima2419 hadith: bukhari 5230, 3729 and muslim 2449
If women are possessive of their husbands their labeled weak and insecure (men look down on them), but if men are possessive of their women, while they don't even want her to look at another man, they get praised. I find this a double standard. Isn't the monogamy clause in the contract a Hanbali matter?
Are you muslim?
Lower your gaze it's for both male and female. But man have more obligations to female than vice verse, womans have to be protected.
Well said 😅
When a man belongs to another religion then how can he convert himself to Muslim religion?
According to science men cannot stay happy with only one wife at all ...men are naturally polygamous in nature
Only weak men can . But neither normal male nor strong male can stay happy with only one wife at all...
This is science and nature ..
If u have problem then don't marry any one keep your possessiveness with you ...their are billions female in world.. no one need and wants stupid female like you who don't believe in nature and science 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
A woman is allowed to add the clause in her contract if he doesn’t want to agree with it then he can find someone who doesn’t mind him marrying again, simple as.
Nikah nama is civil contract not sahaba nabi sallallahu alaihi wasallam contract... Any one can break the clause at any time after nikah EXEPT Maher ..all clause can be broken if one is not agree with other after nikah ..so don't put such stupid conditions
No you can’t its a contract you can’t just break clauses that’s why you’re held accountable if you don’t want to comply then simply file divorce
@@hinakashir657 did I say you can break it
@@usamasohail3294 no you can’t because breaking a contract two parties agree with is haram
@@hinakashir657 Mufti saab fatwa on this... this nikah nama is Civil contract ,it will end if one of two person is not agree with the conditions in present which is mentioned in past .... Fatwa on this and I will obey Mufti n scholars ,,not stupid blind public opinions like you n others ...
It takes a very secure women to not accept anything less then her rights and divorce a man who disrespects her especially because most of society chastises divorced women - thus it will
Take a lot of security and bravery on a women to not accept such emotional abuse, add the clause and then act upon it if a man deceptively married her by agreeing to the clause and then broke it
Some men don’t follow the clause because they don’t believe in it like me I don’t follow that ruling so breaking it isn’t sinful
No woman has a right have a man to herself (and for what exactly?) - it goes against nature and a man's mission is not a woman
exactly
Her right is not to stop her husband marrying again
@@MessiWorldCup-th2de If you can't even keep a simple promise, it shows how weak you are. Not even your children will trust a liar.
Ladies make sure you have an education and skills , stack your money. Very important to invest and save for retirement.
Can’t work after marriage ur husband would want u home and raising children
@@MessiWorldCup-th2deI’m talking about the entirety of you life span you need to earn money
@@Tamar-sz8oxWhen husband want his wife's presence and intimacy a working women can't meet the duties of a wife. Be a house wife and focus on husband and children and make family as first and foremost priority. A good wife will spend her most of the time in home and think about her husband and children if she isn't happy to be this kind of wife she isn't a marriageable women...
Ladies have no problem saying a high mahr is her right, but when it comes to man's rights feminists come out of their closets and say "secure your money". Hypocrite?
@@shadmani9687there is nothing wrong with a woman contributing to her family money wise eg new roof on the house $15,000 , new washer and dryer $3,000 , and it’s the responsible thing to do - having a retirement plan . It’s not a women vs man thing it’s common sense
I think it’s a valid reason. Honestly would rather never marry at all than allow my potential spouse to marry another.
Thank you. Same. I would not get married call it a insecurity if you will but my feelings wouldn’t change, I couldn’t fulfill my parts as a wife due to the jealousy and anger so before I go to hell because of someones dusty son, I would rather stay single and alone with 20 cats
@Thatsfine1998_ daily reminder to you my sister do not marry a muslim who was married before because they are not virgin keep yourself for a virgin man ask theme if they were married or had haram relationship and tell other girls and women to do the same. Muslim always marrys a virgin even if
@@Thatsfine1998_ Yeah and also knowing how it would mess up a girl's Ph-and just the idea of sharing a man sexually is just gross to me I couldn't.
You are trying to say to me that you women wouldn't marry the prophets and messengers or any of the sahaba?????? Please learn your deen.
@@mogainz since when are modern day men prophets and sahabas? You really think being YOUR wife is equal to being the wife of a Prophet? 🤣🤣🤣🤣 please … you thought you ate. İ would be willing to be the 600th wife if it was with one of our wonderful prophets but reality check: modern man ain’t no Prophet. 80% can’t even clean after themselves and you want me to be a devoted wife to someone who just wants to fulfil his sexual desires? Don’t ever shame a women and question her faith just because İ know my rights and know very well that İ have the right to choose to marry or stay single. What makes u think being the wifes of the likes of you is anything similiar to be a prophets wife and therefore İ should marry someone even if he wants more wifes. Those who want more wifes also don’t go looking for widows or divorcees. They want fresh virgin young women. They only follow the sunnah when it benefits them. Their intention is not “helpimg widows and oprhans by marrying and taking care of them”, they wanna cheat but can’t so suddenly the sunnah to have more wifes seems amazing to them. But just like you have the right to a second wife, İ have the right to stay single and not deal with mental torture
I was the latter, my ex married without my knowledge. I was informed by outside 3rd parties. HUMILIATED. I am still traumatized with the disposal of myself after 28 yeas of rmarriage. My heart hurts for my youngest daughter who has mostly been raised without her father as a constant presence.
That is your fault. Let the father see her daughter.
You ex is Not following the sunnah or islamic practice
I am sorry that happened to you sister. You deserved better
Your ex will be punished. Go find a new man! Don’t waste your life dear! Be happy.
@@bianbde1683they never get punishment.. trust me
I want a husband who himself wouldn't want to have 2nd wife. The reason shouldn't be me or any clause mentioned in the contract rather it should be his own will to not remarry. If these kinda men Don't exist then I would rather stay unmarried.
People change. Add clause.
Consulate a righteous scholar.
Firstly, put a clause that your husband cant take second wife in the nikah contract. If he does, he'll be punished on the day of judgement for breaching the contract also you can separate from him. A man who cant keep his word isn't worth it. If you can manage a co wife, no shame or problem in that.
The clause is only allowed for a woman to be able to divorce her husband should he remarry, otherwise she is not allowed to divorce just because he got another wife. Allah has allowed polygyny for men, therefore if a husband breaks contract and remarries it is not haram for him to do so. The clause in the contract is ONLY so that the woman is allowed to divorce him. It does not bind him to not being allowed to have another wife.
If my wife put that kind of clause, would also put a clause that she has to be virgin before marriage.
That's manipulation.First you want to keep a clause in marriage contract with out him agreeing completely then you want to hold him accountable for his natural inclination.Remember sister If Allah has ordained for your man to marry multiple times then no one can change the qadr of Allah.I know that it is not easy to be in a polygamous marriage but the fact is that it is still not Haram.Why you want your man to obey the stupid clause of marriage contract which you added in the contract based on your own insecurities when you don't want to take the bitter pill yourself.
You want your man to accept your demands where you fail to accept the decree of Allah.Society and media paints a rather horrible picture of polygyny because they don't want Muslims to grow as a community.If you are not obeying your husband do you still think you are pleasing Allah????
@@00aaaimam ahmad allowed it. It is a valid opinion based on the evidences of the quran and sunnah. She can stipulate it in the contract if she wants to 😂 literally every scholar agrees with this because it’s a valid opinion so stop being harsh with this sister. If YOU want a woman that accepts polygamy then go find that woman but do not destroy their rights or try to manipulate them by lying or making them feel bad when the scholars clearly tell us they’re allowed to stipulate that in the nikkah contract.
Polygamy is only mentioned once in a Surrah about women’s right. So if a woman doesn’t want to be in a polygamous marriage, she has the right to decline and, a man, as a Quwaam is not supposed to break his first family only to start a new one. What kind of Quwaam would that be? Although, men running after many women is a sign of weak men. Also, it’s Sunnah to add the clause to not allow the husbands to marry another in the wive’s lifetime, because it was our Prophet PBUH who added this clause to Fatima’s r.a marriage contract and forbade her husband from taking multiple wives. I think the scholars seem to have amnesia when it comes to that Sunnah.
Stupid girl..
Second and third wife can decline to become second wife without a doubt ..
But first wife cannot decline ok..if he can justice between wives...
So don't make your own islamic rules which comforts you..
And btw we have scholars also female scholars says..
A man can have 4 wives at a time..
And first wife cannot prevent hubby from taking second (if he is capable)...
Capable in money and time..to do justice
"break his first" - nope it's the weak Iass breaking.
"of weak men" - do you have proof or you insecure you can't handle it, nisa even recommend their husband to their cousins who can take shahada.
"added this clause to Fatima’s" - he specified Abu Jahl's daughter not to marry Ali, maybe you forgot that, that's why it's a bit ambiguous!
@@falsesectslikeshiaarejudeo6543 so men who can’t control their lust for the sake of Allah are week.
As I mentioned, women don’t have to accept polygamy. They can just add this clause to their marriage contract (Nikkah doc). Allah never ordered women to share husbands. The three most important women in Islam, known as the "Mothers of Islam," were not involved in polygamous marriages. Polygamy is NOT a pillar of Islam or article of faith so more of a reason not be continue this practice. End of discussion!
@@mizgenius3363 Asalam ALeikum sister, thank you for the reply, just want to clarify.
"can’t control" - i agree, poor control can be week, may Allah guide us, but having a strong feeling isn't bad, it's sunnah to have big families & it does connect - no doubt.
Prophet Muhammad peace and blessings be upon him ws with all 9 at one night sometimes, so we have to be responsible.
"don’t have to accept polygamy" - maybe , I am still researching this, but they should be honest, many nisa do change their minds I have noticed.
Anyways you seem like a nice sister. May Allah guide us. Just don't look down at polygynous brothers, in many places revert sisters can't find husbands and they do really care for them.
@@falsesectslikeshiaarejudeo6543 Walaikum Assalam brother,
Although our Prophet PBUH did what had to be done to address social injustices, Islam encourages monogamy. Polygamy was allowed as a temporary solution to support mainly widows, orphans and women in general, however, even then Allah imposed difficult conditions. If those conditions couldn't be met, Allah advised men to marry ONLY ONE. Furthermore, in the Quran it is mentioned that creation of everything is in PAIRS (Verses 51:49, 78:6-16). PAIRS = TWO. Quran also mentions that marrying just one completes a man’s Deen. So it’s really sad to see weak men today abuse a verse that was only mentioned once is the entire Quran. Revert women are the most vulnerable, and such men convince them that they are only good for polygamy. With all due respect brother, if you are not a woman, you cannot speak for us if we change our minds or not. Also, you are asking me not to look down on polygamous brothers while brothers abuse the verse and call women insecure if they use their right not to accept polygamy like in this video. Isn’t that double standards?
I told my husband before marriage that I do not want to marry a polygamist because I don’t want a complicated marriage. He said that he only ever wants me. He knows that moment he talk about have another wife I’ll leave him right away. For me if my husband is considering another wife it means he doesn’t love and respect me anymore.
Thank you..having deep thoughts from before
Men can love you and want more thats how GOD created us, dont shout,
Marriage in Islam is a civil contract, nothing more. Allah recognizes the fact that it is female nature to be hypergamous. In the vast majority of the cases, the man is the provider and higher earner in the relationship. A man provides for the material well-being and safety of his family. The woman makes the home and takes care of his physical needs. If either party neglects their role, then the other can and should leave. No sense being in an unhappy situation. "Love" as defined today is a purely commercialized Western concept and has led to a great deal of unhappiness in women. Yes, if he promised not to take a second wife and you are fulfilling your role and then he goes back on his word, leave him. But if he wants a second wife because while he is doing his part, but you are not doing your part, then you can still leave him as that is your right in Islam. But he would not be wrong in taking a second wife at that point.
Exactly! I'm glad you know your worth
@@STOICSAYS985The answer is a clear no. If you want more it's clear you don't love them with whole heart.
You weren't created to be public toilets. Don't bring Almighty to cover your filth.
And if you fear that you may not be just to the orphans, then you may marry whom you please of the women, two, three, or four. But if you fear being unfair, then only one, or what your right hand possesses, for that will make it less likely that you act unfairly. 4:3
To all the sisters who are worried about a man taking a 2nd wife…..how many men do you know personally who have actually done this???
I guarantee you can count them on your fingers.
Stop worrying about something that most likely won’t happen.
It’s not as easy and fun as it sounds to take a second wife.
Can you take a 2nd job on the same level as your first job?
Even with the potential of earning double most still can’t do it.
This should be top comment
If he breaks the clause or cheats on his wife then she has every right to seek divorce. He clearly was a deceptive person and not a moral person whose looking to deceive people or break clauses and marry on the wrong pretenses. Don’t marry a guy that can’t agree to the nikkah clauses you have every right to and don’t marry women that require clauses that you’re not man enough to abide by
if every woman comes with a clause like that then the men will be foreced to agree to it. We don't need to tell our wife if we married again. why should a man go though more harm abiding by something that will only cause more fitnah for himself.
@@shadowstorm5261 A man causes fitnah whether he's married or not married.
@@sdiasvet maybe for you or other young sisters and week ones, but many sisters appreciate quality over quantity and talk about nika when they don't study and aren't even ready.
@@shadowstorm5261You're selfish and a liar if you think not telling your wife is OK. It's not, it is cheating.
It's a shitty Shariah injunction. He can cheat
..when exposed ... create a 2nd .. 4th nikah
This life is temporary, and treating it like it is forever will create unnecessary problems. There is no guarantee of any relationship succeeding and people change over a lifetime.
Best thing to do is make life easy for others and Allah swt will make your life easy…
So…second husbands?
Can I suggest changing the thumbnail. It is disturbing to show him with both wives at the same time.
Why is it disturbing?
It is not that disturbing if both are legally his wives. You are sensitive.
They are not sensitive, they are right. It's giving the wrong idea here as it's haram. @@thepointlesswords290
It's fcking disgusting 🤮🤮
@@thepointlesswords290 I think because they probably wouldn’t have a sentimental group hug like that
I mean emotionally usually, it creates jealousy and it takes a long time for me to really understand the wisdom of Allah s.w.t and because I came from a background where my mother is divorced because of second marriage.
But truly, Allah s.w.t is full of wisdom and he had given so much right to a woman that it is beautiful, so I am going to accept when Allah s.w. t allows polygamy for men as long as he has not transgress the right of of his wife as a woman.
If he transgresses, then he should release the wife. It is very difficult to digest it because women are jealous in nature but Allah s.w. t loves you more than your husband so there must be some reason why your husband is married to another woman also and it will benefit us if we sabr. ❤
Men are also very jealous but nisa do like a brother who other nisa also like... I find if the wife respects the man she will let him lead and respect his choice.
Nisa who don't respect husbands, unless it's for din related issues, tend to be bad mothers.
You’re trying so hard to convince yourself. It’s so sad honestly. 💔
@@falsesectslikeshiaarejudeo6543Wrong. You act like all husbands are good people. There are men who are bad leaders and providers. A mother leaving that man is a good decision as she does not want to raise her kids around evil.
Shame on everone and everything that oppresees women with Polygamy, Child marriages, FGM, Sex-slavery, Half inheritances and credibility, Marital violence, Denial of right to education (hence career and financial self-reliance) and leadership roles in contemporary world.
Pajeet😂
How?
@deepsareen1 Perfectly said! I totally agree. World should be a better place if everyone could be treat fairly
Don’t get married and avoid the problem completely
Marriage isnt a problem. The people involved in the marriage are the problem. If both men and women understood what a Muslim marriage is and they practiced it, then women wouldn't be complaining about polygamy.
Also, why would you encourage women to not get married? We arent atheists or agnostics. We have standards and morals.
@@samueldavids3704 since you know all about it can you explain to me what good Muslim Marriage is then. And why women woudnt be complaining about polygamy if they understood
@@TheNiceOne_ You don't need him to get answer to your question. You go through the comment you will see how women are groomed in Islam. One thing I want to learn from Islam is How to create people who will blindly follow you. All regions have foolishness in holy books .But they don't specify how hypnotize and make people follow blind faith.
true 😪
Great idea, if that is your mindset, I think staying single will be best for you
It just comes down to the question why was I not enough? I get that they are allowed but what more could that other person give you? Why go for another marriage? or do us women look at this on an emotional level?
It's about control for many men. And their lust. One needs self-respect to walk away from such disfunction.
Men are different.
It all comes to money, this polygamy thing is all about money being used as a power tool to use against the poorer party, it has nothing to do with emotions or men's needs, that's just a man's made excuse because it happens that the system over history gave them more access to money than their wives, what if he's the one that's not enough for her? Most of the time she can't say anything because she will be judged by him and everyone else as a lustful and not a "pure woman" and she can't get a divorce without a big reason since she's not financially independent, they say women that desire multiple men are not real women but men that desire multiple women are normal men, seems very convincing when most women are poorer than their husbands (hence more desperate), where's the proof that a rich woman wouldn't change a husband for a new one every 6 months? Because these women exist they just don't publicly announce it because of the social stigma about the female desire to try new partners (even in halal) every ones in a while same as the man
Why!Why! you man don't want to understand that we women can't share our husband with another woman...we women can share everything but not my husband... We just can't stand it!and you man said that called it jealousy!! NO IT'S NOT JEALOUSY..
You will never understand us and our pain 😭
Thats your problem.If you are a good muslim women you wont be jealous.
@@noonwraith401 you are again named it jealous!!! remember four marriage is permissible not Sunnah!!
@@noonwraith401 will allow your father to marry another woman when your mother is alive????
@@sabiraislam6334 Yeah surely.Its his islamic right.Anybody that hates what Allah has made permissible is an apostate.
@@noonwraith401 no it's your problem that you dont have a personal priority to let your husband get married to someone else
You can't stop your husband from wanting another woman, but you can get a divorce.
All souls have the right for peace, to choose what kind of company befit their hearts.
"O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will."
Quran, 4:19
WOWWW...why we need ulma muftis if we have to understand Qur'an ahdees on our own benefits...
You can get divorce khula but but cannot force for divorce.....
If you force for khula if husband is dealing good with both wives..
Then your asking of divorce mistake will lead to to hell fire 🔥 and you will not smell fragrance of Jannah insha Allah
Yes I agree. Women gets jealous too they get possessive too why don't they just get it. And they says Islam treats women and men equally
That's not a valid reason to divorce. Please stop.
@@usamasohail3294but today there 1-2% people who can treat both wives well,,,mostly they forget about others when they get new,,Also its her rights too ,,If he cant fulfill her needs after 2nd wife ,,if she suffers at night,,then why cant she divorce and find someone who will accompany her in the night!???
@@HelloPeople666 stupid read clearly... I said if he can justice between wives..then no women has right to take khula...
And by the way ..
and justice betwenn wives will be according to shariah law..
Shariah law demands ..
Right of night sharing is 1/1 for each wife..
Also necessary expenses will be count in justice..
In simple words..
A men need to spend 1 night with each wife..
And need to give max 10k inr for each wife...(this is in tafseer of verse I have read))
Thats called justice.. justice is also simple..
Some cheap and wicked women make false statements on justice ..
Like that..
1)Men has to produce same amount of babies from both wives..
2)Same number of inter course with wives..
3)same amount of Maher .same amount of time in seconds..
Same amount of feelings with both wives..
Same amount of money for both wife
Even is wives has 5 kids or 1 kid...
This is false statements made by feminists..
Which is not in Qur'an ahdees
Nor in fiqah..
No ulma Mufti says such conditions which is made by feminists
.
So don't bark men cannot do justice..
And why you women won't bark when a man is not deal with 1 wife..
No women ever complaint and bark ,,
if hubby treat single wife badly rudely..
You women only complaint when it is POLYGAMous??
It shows you women only want gender equality..
In short you women want men also settled on one wife ..even men not agree on this..and they can treat all wives equally..
. ridiculous thinking by women
This shows your sick mentality and wicked intention and feminism mind..
Go and bark on those with same energy..
Don't be hypocrites women ok..
Same number of
In simple words...in normal'conditions
Asalaamu Alaikum w w even Allah mentiond in quraan surah nisa verse 3 , Marry 2.3.4. But Marriying one is good for you .then why you guys want which is not good for you ?
the verse it self says 2, 3 or 4 then it mentions 1 last. marrying more women is better and more rewarding. marrying one is also reccommended for those who cannot afford more than one
@@shadowstorm5261
It depends on your ability, the brothers adn sisters should focus on learning in the order the sahabas did and insha Allah things will be easy!
“O Allah, make my religion easy for me by virtue of which my affairs are protected, set right for me my world where my life exists, make good for me my Hereafter which is my resort to which I have to return, and make my life prone to perform all types of good, and make death a comfort for me from every evil.”
Ameen❤
The best advice I've ever heard on this issue ist this: If a woman does not want a poligamous marriage, because it would break her, she should marry a monogamous man. And they do exist Alhamdulillah. And a man who wants multiple wives, should only marry women who are able to accept polygamy. This would save everyone a lot of trouble and heartache. Such a simple and logical solution. MashaAllah
Many men always follow their desire, no matter what the wife did to please them, if their heart already full of shahwa to other women. It will not work
😶🌫️
Allah created use this way then why women blame Allah's creation...😢😢😢
@@KadershaN-ou2sjthe same way you blame women when they’re on their period or pregnancy and can’t control their hormones 😊
Yeah it's better to Follow Heart than Shackled down
@@KadershaN-ou2sjand allah swt also told you have control on your desire, that is why, we fast in the month of ramadan to get sabr on multiple things, you can definitely control your lust if you want to, both men and women
@@KadershaN-ou2sjthe same way you blame for women wanting to work lol
It is not insecurity. It is an expression and an upholding of the woman's interests, which she has the right to do. If a woman absolutely doesn't want a polygynous husband, then she MUST put the skids on polygyny by inserting a clause into the marriage contract right at the very beginning forbidding the husband to marry any other women while he is married to her. Because if she doesn't, then after marriage he is absolutely free to marry other women if he wants to, and she doesn't have any authority to stop him. It's no use her being hysterical that her husband has married another woman if she didn't stipulate a condition into the marriage contract in the first place that states that he can't marry any other women if he marries her.
Include into your marriage contract that he can't marry anyone else. And if he still wants to have more wives...
Dear women in this world leave that poor excuse of human being and let him go wherever he wants. Divorce that filth and start your own life.
Create your own beautiful days alone or with someone else. It's your choice.
Marriage contract is invalid if it goes against islamic rules ....said by lawyers and scholars both..so don't bark about this paper contract
I know your butt n ass will burn by this..
But no one cares...
Truth is truth...
@@SK-gm7ge STFU! Don't even try to manipulate me. I am educated and smart enough to not fall for your cheap tricks. If he commits Zina he should get punished by Allah and go to hell. I don't care about cheaters.
He's a man, a human with a brain and mind of his own, he has conscious, he can choose to do right or wrong. If he commits sin it's his own choice and he has to take the punishment for it. Also I'll leave the cheater too. So.. Get a life and get a brain.
@@SK-gm7ge no she is egoistic..she only wants to satisfy her ego...
@@usamasohail3294 You can keep your hypocrisy to yourself and get out of my comment.
@@usamasohail3294what about the man????? How quick you are with a flippant response if a woman kicks the man to the curb! Strong women make men insecure. Men who have multiple wives do not marry women who are strong, secure and independent. They look for someone who will be totally dependent on the husband monetarily so he isn't challenged!
If a man plans to get another wife if he wants to but if a wife is completely against it then they shouldnt get married. Everyone have dealbreakers so we should go over them before getting married.
The woman has the right to divorce and level up and leave the trash behind
The clause is only allowed for a woman to be able to divorce her husband should he remarry, otherwise she is not allowed to divorce just because he got another wife. Allah has allowed polygyny for men, therefore if a husband breaks contract and remarries it is not haram for him to do so. The clause in the contract is ONLY so that the woman is allowed to divorce him. It does not bind him to not being allowed to have another wife.
If my husband wants to marry a second wife I think it wouldn’t be a good idea at all… because I’m sure I will search for another man who can only have eyes for me, and give me all of his attention and care… my husband marrying another woman would definitely make me sin … because I’m only human, I’m not perfect and if I’m not happy at home I would look for something new. I’m quite possessive and that’s how Allah created me, I’m not capable of sharing and I accept myself like that
Well that’s what I am already doing. He hasn’t even married second but he is talking about a second wife in jokes and I took it seriously. I have another man and he loves me so much. We are planning to be together till the day we die and meet in heaven InshaAllah.
@@bianbde1683 There is always truth hidden in jokes
@@bianbde1683and you have already committed a sin.
@@onlygaming6698I will ask Allah to judge you for judging me without knowing anything about my life.
@@onlygaming6698I am set to marry this person and I have the rights if my husband and is abusive towards me.
Cost of living is so high at the moment and there is a housing crisis. I think it would be very difficult to do a second marriage and provide equality between the two now.
It might be allowed in Islam but I’m against it and I should be respected for it khalas .
The prophet Muhammad SAW was married to Khadijah RA for 25 yes and never even thought of having a second wife not until when she breathed her last yet we are told His manpower was equivalent to that of 100 men
your prophet had 13 wives one of them was 6 years old
You are very right abt being a good husband first. I have experience in that field and I would like to tell all the young ladies out there:
The best husband is a loving, supportive husband who has only you as a wife
The second best is a husband who is loving and supportive but has another wife
The third best is a husband who is not loving and supportive but you are his only wife. Actually, this is not a good husband.
And the worst husband is he who is not loving and supportive and has another wife on top of that.
And ladies, please, if and when you marry a man who is already married: It is by no means permissible for you to try and get rid of the first wife. This would be the meanest thing you can do, but I have seen it again and again.
May Allah guide them. Ameen.
Why did u add Women's pic in thumbnail? Did u put ur mom/ sis pic on this?
Marriage is sacred and it is between two people only. More than two is a crowd....and is only lust driven!
Wrong. I can love multiple woman. Love isn't binded to one person. You can love multiple woman, you love your father and mother, brothers and sisters, cousins, friends and pets etc. Love is abundant, not limited.
Edit : Spelling
Quran says otherwise 😊
God determines what a marriage is, you dont.
@@shadmani9687 God made one Eve for Adam.
Even the Quran says ' We made them in pairs'
@@ironbutterfly12Cherrypicking to make your point. Allah also says in the Quran you can marry up to 4 and that no man will be in pairs in Jannat.
This is a typical SIGN (Shame, Insult, guilt and Need to be right) language from feminists. When women dont like facts they will try to shame you on insult you or try to make you feel guilty or have the need to be right when she knows she is wrong.
A woman is “insecure” because she stipulates in her marriage contract that she doesn’t want her husband to take a second wife? Why don’t we spin this. Say a woman was allowed to marry 4 men, you think her husband would be Ok with her taking a second husband? Yeah that’s what I thought.
The latest video on my channel really shows the beautiful character of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (SAW)❤️
In such case men should also be allowed to write clause that "in unfortunate event of divorce, all divorce proceedings must be according to SHARIAH LAWS and NOT existing Government Laws".
Smart man. Be unbiased. I love listening to you.
i think the matter is being taken out of proportion lol ... islam allows polygny doesn't encourage it also its not allowed in some circumstances.. for instance if a man is stuggulign to provide for his wife and kids, would the Islamic court allow him to marry a second wife???? both parties need to discuss beforehand what they want and prefer and find someone like minded... the issue is men don't even want the women who are okay with polygamy but they want the women are not okay so it feels like a game to them. its ego problem
Sorry disagree on the clause part. Y shud the husband get free reign
Let’s reverse this?? Would a man feel secure and comfortable if his wife were sleeping with another man half of the nights?
Right, these dudes are so darn arrogant and selfish. Disgusting
They'll simply call the woman "hoe"
I have a great amount of respect for Mufti, however it isn't insecurities. If a woman love you she likely won't want to share in your holy bond. The way Allah, swt made us in the beginning is perfection everything after was to be a mercy.
I’d like a 2nd husband. What are your thoughts about this
Allah azza wa jal knows what is best for his creation. One of the problems with polyandry is that how would the woman know who is the father of each of her children?
@@blackbeautifulandsmart2849 DOES IT REALLY MATTER WHO THE FATHER IS. WHEN THERE IS ONE MOTHER. WOMEN SHOULD HAVE MULTIPLE HUSBANDS AND RULE THE WORLD 🌍
Let's go and get it girl😂😂
@@KhadizaAkter-e1p LET ME KNOW HOW YOU SUCCEED
Sheikh answered the question in a very diplomatic way, understandably so because of the influence of western ideologies like feminism on our sisters. But before you put such a clause, where does it end? What if a guy wants a clause that she must be a virgin, or never had a boyfriend, or has never been touched by a non-Marham, or intimacy 24/7 for the rest of the marriage, or she must quit her job or education, or she can never leave the house, or she must change phones and get rid of her past life. where do these clauses end? This is something that once opened, cannot be closed back. I believe Allah has already perfected this religion for us, which is why no addition can be made into the religion. And we have to be careful in trying to make Haram what Allah has made halal, which usually leads to the reverse of people making halal what Allah has made Haram. Be careful of following the footsteps of shaitan. Jazzakallah
Well spoken
Please raise your hand in the comments section if you are a qualified scholar who has spent and dedicated their life to studying and preserving the sciences of Islām.
Barakallah feek ❤
I don’t understand why a lot of the men in the comment section are against the whole idea of the wife divorcing them because they do not want their husband to find a second wife. If they want to divorce their husband, even if it’s discouraged, it’s still allowed.
Not quite sure why that bothers men who aren’t even married to begin with. If the wife divorces their husband over this matter… i mean, you’re still going to have another wife at the end of the day. Besides, you can just find yet another wife if the first leaves, is that not right? You’re allowed up to four wives.
So many women on this earth, and yet you’re going to find some who don’t want to be in a polygamous relationship, contract or not. Wooptydoo
Unless there is a helpless situations there is no need to get married to another women infact it will obstruct spiritual progress . Mufti menk and rest of these mainstream preachers only speak nice words but they are void of sprirtiuality . Its a shame .
I guess u didn't hear what mufti menk said he doesn't knows the situation of the individual who asked the question.
If u want further information go and pls contact with ur local mufti and find the whole fiqh behind it.
And stop disrespecting scholars they've sacrificed their Dunya just for Allah taala and we are so possessed about our Dunya that we are rarely able to give 20-30 mins to our Salah.
Jazakallah khairan
Theres no reason a man needs to marry again, we don’t have the same situations as the people the past. There arent more women in world and men arent dying in wars more then women. So a man doesnt have a good enough reason to marry more than once other than “I can” and “Allah allows me”. Allah is not saying you have to marry four but you can.
@@HA-jq1mu stupid foolish person... Female have periods of 8 days in month .. every month ..
2 days she goes to her parents home every month...
1,2 days for health problems..
In fact wife physically available for 20 days only for his husband.. That too when she isn't pregnant and not sick..
Out of 30 days wive physically available for his husband is only 20 days ..
So what can a man do in those 10 days when wife physically not available,, he keep masturbation and using sex dolls but no second wife blah balha...
If she is pregnant then husband has to masturbation for 5-6 months ...
Do you have any other option than second wives ??
Hahaha
What a joke!
U said nikah obstructs sprituality!
Isnt this a joke!
We neither live in churches nor in temples
Neither we are taught to do so,
Our family life,our dealings ,our participation in all social issues
Is the actual message of islam....
There is no sprituality
If we dont follow this normal life system ....
BCOZ we are humans not robots nor machines ...
We need love and support
And we should give love and support to others
And fulfil all duties as a servant of ALLAH SWT
this is sprituality
@@brokensoul77 why you are giving logic and reason to such fools... Some people never understand anything at all
Why are all the negative comments coming from females, especially Muslim females. Are your opinions based on Qur’ān & Sunnah or just your emotions.
Hi would you please make a video regarding how we can explain to our children that hemosexuality is bad despite all media promoting it?🙏
they ban from BlO donations.
I agree it's about insecurity, but not on the part of the woman. It shows that she is expressing doubts as to whether the man she's chosen can provide security and can actually be loyal. If you feel a man is besotted with you and won't choose anyone else, then you won't put in the clause because there is no need to. But if then, such a person brings a second wife later, you will simple divorce them, because a second wife was never on the table for you. The point of the clause, presumably in the mind of the women, is to protect their marriage, but whether or not the clause is in there, this woman will divorce that man if he ever does introduce a second wife. If you're questioning whether to put this clause in there, I would say seriously question yourself on who you are choosing to marry, and what is it you are observing in his character that is making you want to put in such a clause.
The more possessive and insecure we first wives are, while giving our husbands no peace at home, no proper food, comfort or sex, we force our husbands to do Zina.
So we first wives are at fault !
Also, if a man has been promiscuous before marriage, it is blund to happen after marriage too !
So what Allah has permitted, who are we and why should we dare to stop our husbands from marrying again while remaining married to us as their first wives ?!
Alhamdulillah I am happy and we wives are like sisters to one another with no ounce of comeptition amongst us or jealousy, envy or hatred against each other.
Most importantly my husband and our families with us two wives are at peace with each others, even the kids and we all respect one another.
Alhamdulillah.
Ma Shaa Allah good for u.
But that doesn't mean that it's the same case with everyone. Some men also do injustice to their first wife thinking that it's their right.
In some cases even is first wife is very understanding, gives proper food, comfort and even pleasure and doesn't even force her husband even then without any valid reason they leave their first wife and children behind following their lust for other women ,not only multiple marriages they do zina also even if their "first " Wife is pious. That doesn't mean that they r right in any way.
No one can force the man to be unfaithful, marriage is a 2 way street, a real man would take it to his wife up front as a discussion if he felt a need wasn't being met. No need to put the blame all on yourself
My dear sister
I salute u
And i love u from bottom of my heart
Bcoz what u said
Its not only a line...
Its sign of ur Greatness and uniqueness ....
Whether u r first wife or second
But i salute u for ur positive and GOD FEARING attitude ....
U know before ten years
My thinking regarding second marriage of a man was also bad!
Bcoz of little knowledge ,
Or bcoz of the social image
Or bcoz of me my and just mine world type thoughts..
But when i.growup and i experienced realized the a reality of second nikah,
WALLAHI I TOO DECIDED TO marry a married man
Bcoz this great sunnah has A very very beatiful and great message in it!
And the fact is that it has 99% benefits only 1% sideeffects
Thats is of first wife's sadness or ego...
But if husband loves her,respects her,protects her,the way islam tells him...
Im 100% sure she can forget all that ...
But unfortunately we considered its 1% bad effects and forgets 99% great effects
Mashallah very good sister..you follow islam another word of nature ...you will be rewarded for your good deed in akhirah too...
@@brokensoul77 at least women with mind 👏👏
Why do I even read the comments and cry? It's not even practiced in my culture...
Simple answer : change for a monogamous religion 😊
You can change the religion but not the truth. And we believe that islam is the truth.
@@Veilorah what an uneducated statement. Amazing how you dare to lie to justify the worse of your religion. I won't even reply to such a ridiculous belief
Better to act like a man than having secret girlfriends while being married, and acting all innocent
@@faras010 yeah Muslims alway reply with this poor argument. but then it applies to women's too : better to have several husbands than several boyfriends ? Your ridiculous religion is based on discrimination.
@@danielalexandre4008it's not a ridiculous argument. It's a statement of a harsh reality.
It is a valid clause if you are declaring before Allah that you will not marry a second wife. You are giving you word before Allah.
Isn't it strange that Adam had Eve? Just one woman. He didn't have Eve, Julie, Sarah, Mary. Man who looks for another is not a man at all.
There were no options at the time.. how about Abraham though he wasn't a real man? How about Solomon? How about Jacob?
@@sultansaladin2020 men with big egos.
@@jasral7767 Aoodhu Billahi Minash Shaitaan ArRajeem
@@jasral7767This is video isnt useful for you, inshallah when you find the path and become a Muslim then these fatawa will be needed may Allah guide you
@aurelion3 family was. Great grandad put all his children in different religion. After he found out certain Muhammed mole sted his wife at age of 6, then ra ped her at 9. He also slept with his daughter-in-law. Slaves. A dead wo man . Killed 600 Jewish men in 1 days. Sent assasin's to kill. They killed as she breast fed. Looted, killed, robbed. Great grandad said proph et Mu ham mad truly is a evil man & so are the people that truly follow him. Don't pray for me, I will pray for you.
is the Muslim wife can decide to have her husband more wives?
Noting to do with insecurity just lack of trust. It’s simple if the husband wants another wife and you have no confidence in his ability to be fair equally divorce him; no body has a right to force you to live in conditions less than what Allahs has ordained for you. It’s beyond me why men would invite such high risk of sin from not living up to the expectation that the Prophet has set out for men which are so high to begin with you don’t even have time for more than one wife. I barely see 1 out of ten passably happy marriages in monogamous society, what hell of a drama it must be for non monogamous communities. Advice to men: pray more; do more charity, focus on ahira not sex with different women.
I wont encourage any women to divorce unless it's a serious case like beating for exemple, we wont advice to divorce just because a man did a second marriage that is halal for him and i dont think de divorce will be valid in this case
@@xtaz666I will encourage every woman to divorce if the husband wants a second marriage. No one deserves to be treated as a useless piece of wood laying near someone's feet.
@@sabrinahaqueshoily3453 are you muslim?
@@xtaz666
I disagree, because there is a hadith sahih saying a woman is allowed to get a divorce even if she has no other reason than not being able to live with her husband. Meaning he's a good and righteous person, but she doesn't like him as her husband. Divorce is allowed but nevertheless not recommended or liked. Every couple has to find the best way for themselves. Maybe you would think you would want a divorce in case of a second wife immediately and later in your life find it acceptable. Or the other way round, when it happened you find it unacceptable. Wa Allahu alim.
@@xtaz666you can check hadith Sahih bukhari 5230 in that case. Can research Google
Prophet Mohammed sav did not endorse Ali Ra to get a second wife beside Fatima. It is said that Ali ra wanted to marry but the Prophet sav showed his discontent.
This picture is not good of a husband and two wives in a setting like this, because polygamy is not a triangle.
It's
H
AND
W
H
AND
W
2 different separate, private relationships.
It's not a three some.
. NO
H
W W
XD
I think a woman should not break another womans home n get married...there are enough single men..leave the married men alone..just coz women are available men have choices.
He has multiple wives ! Mufti menk 🥹😅🤣🤣🤣
Does he? He doesn’t discuss his private life
So?
@@TA-bo5bc I don’t like that ‘! Mind ur own business! This comment is for my fiancé to see! I hate such horny men who don’t adjust with one ☝️’ and I know it’s allowed to marry and be in polygamy! U should really mind ur own business
Yes!!! To apologise him and ask the diforce! There is no love than for the women second wife is forbidden in islam!
It is the case that it is permissible for a man to have up to 4 wives under prescribed conditons e.g. equal measure for all 4 wives etc. So why the discusson about a clause in the nikah. I do not get it - should the first wife not know this is permissible? Therefore the point about insecurity?
Bcz first wife wants to follow the things which is benifited to her ..not husband
and so the breakdown of society. All humans, male and female, young and old, everyone has a duty to society, to nurture goodness and the greater purpose. Subhan Allah. This is the true path of righteousness bestowed upon us by Allah Almighty through the messengers / prophets SAW and the Quran
@@urmixbyaagkool1863 bro nikah nama is civil contract not sahaba nabi sallallahu alaihi wasallam contract... Their is no such marriage nikah naama in sahaba's time... And none of sahabaiya stop sahaba from 2,3, 4 marriage,, it our women and sick uneducated women who make such clause and rules and point out such points which only benifits them...
And you know what...if 2nd marriage is bad thing why should any girl or female want to become 2nd wife of someone ,,why such females available for second marriage in our society, ,,if second wife is bad thing...
The truth is only first wife's loss ?not women loss..
@@usamasohail3294 the litmus test for both the woman and man is if the choices they make are in line with the teachings of the true path in life, to fulfil this life's journey for the greater good and society i.e. according to Islam. Then nobody can go wrong. Any selfish choice or made contrary to Islam as the true guidance and purpose of life will always fail
Shouldn’t the husband know that each wife requires her own house and full financial equity, plus he is required to assist with multiple households and raise not just father the children? Most men don’t even help in their one household let alone multiple plus community work and charity. Permission is irrelevant if men are not capable of honoring all their responsibilities. Prophet saws advised best marry only one.
It is also a sunnah to take caof wifes feelings like he never got married to ne 1 at the time of khadeejah ra. agree later all his marriages were situational or for growth of islam....
This mufti is trying to dodge the question.He is not able to clearly answer the question,he must resign from his position of being a mufti.
I think any woman has a lawful right to demand that her husband cannot marry another woman. It should be permissible only if both sides agree. No matter what clause, decree or fatwa is in place. We should stop this nonsense at one point.
Bismillah
Practising poligami as sunnah
May Allah help us...
Mubah
Good explained
Polygamy is disgusting
According ro kafirs.
You cant have another wife because you think a man will cheat. Thats just stupid.
Why can't wife have many husband
It's not allowed.
do you want to be a kafir? these are the laws of allah he has made us diffrently to women
it's not for sisters, and it's not heaIthy.. how will society grow?
If there is 4 husband then who is the father? Men and women are not the same. Why cant a wife protect husband during dangerous situation? Why dont wife give mahr and not husband? Do you ever ask these questions.
@@shadowstorm5261 Allah* - upper case A in Allah shows respect.
Very politically correct answer sheik, like a politician, in todays world it’s better for the women to put the clause, to be safe , it’s unfair for the women ,
But Allah knows best
The women of today are far from the Sahabiyyat. Sad that this is even a question .
Oh really?? Did the sahabiyat liked the other wives their husbands had??? The wives of the prophet Mohammad did not like each other...go and read Surah Attahreem and other hadis.
Plus when you have a look of how Allah's allowed polygamy and made rules for it. You will see that it is all based on ghe woman rejecting to be part of it, and the rules were made to minimize her rejection as much as possible.
First Allah says in the Quran that the man who will have more than one wife will never be just even if he tried hard to be...this is one major reason for the woman to refuse being one of 4 or 3 or 2 wives, so Allah mentioned in the Quran one negative thing that will surely applies to any woman who agrees to stay in such marriage (Islam does not force her to go through this).
In addition to that,
Allah did not allow a man to marry a woman and her sister at the same time...because for sure they will have a negative feeling towards each other.
Allah made it a rule for a man to provide for each wife an independent house....open your eyes.
Unfortunately Muslim men these days are narcissist...they use guilt to trap the woman and prevent her from using her right to refuse and leave
@@raoarw1859men very conveniently skip this kind of information. They only retain " CAN MARRY 4 WIVES " ! 🤦🏽♀️
@@raoarw1859 not all Muslim men. Please be careful with your wording.
@@raoarw1859 some of the mother of believers were friends too like Aisha & Hafsha!
@@falsesectslikeshiaarejudeo6543 getting along with someone doesnt mean you like their existence.
The women in these comments are ridiculous. It's not your choice ladies, it's a man's right and saying you'll leave him is not a good idea... The hadith says that the woman who seeks divorce from her husband for no valid reason won't even smell the fragrance of paradise.
Please if your husband always cheats on u and got 3 women pregnant and marry them behind your back what should the wife do?
If her love and affection is real then she can't separate from him...
Leave him, he doesn’t even respect you enough to be honest with you - his character is severely flawed. Divorce him and marry a better man
you don't even need to ask this question. It is clear as day that his character is lacking and that he is driven by lust. just divorce
Divorce!
If first wife is infertile and reluctant to second marriage of her men, what to do???
Will you give your daughter who has 3 wives already?
I understand this is a sensitive topic for womenfolk. But please Please do your research before giving fatwas. No you are not allowed to divorce your husband just because he marries a second wife. If he does not give your rights as a wife like right to maintenance, equal share of time among the wives, fair treatment etc then only you can demand divorce. Demanding divorce without valid reason is a big sin as there's a hadith :
"If a woman asks her husband for a divorce, for no reason, then the smell of Paradise is forbidden for her". (At-Tirmidhi narrated it. He said this is a hasan hadith. Sunan At-Tirmidhi, 1187.).
And about prophet (saw) not wanting Ali to get married again, that's true but do you know Ali had a slave with home he had intimate relations and prophet knew this and gave his approval?
Hadith:
The Prophet (ﷺ) sent `Ali to Khalid to bring the Khumus (of the booty) and I hated `Ali, and `Ali had taken a bath (after a sexual act with a slave-girl from the Khumus). I said to Khalid, "Don't you see this (i.e. `Ali)?" When we reached the Prophet (ﷺ) I mentioned that to him. He said, "O Buraida! Do you hate `Ali?" I said, "Yes." He said, "Do you hate him, for he deserves more than that from the Khumlus." (bukhari 4350)
If man can get more than 1 wife , woman can get more then one husband too ,it is simple fair really .
Why make it so difficult ,why woman has to accpet this creepy rule ?
(9:65) Should you question them what they were talking about, they would certainly say: “We were merely jesting and being playful.” Tell them: “Was it Allah and His revelation and His Messenger that you were mocking?”
surah-taubah
Then How will she come to know who is real father i will give you a advice that if you don't want to share your husband make a agreement with him before marriage instead of mocking.
Is it normal not to feel jealousy towards a second wife? To be honest i am aware that it is Allah's command and that's it. Men are capable of loving more women at the same time but they will always love one more than another but they will not show that to them they will treat them equally in rights and responsibilities. Therefore i would not feel any jealousy for the second wife. Because men are wired like that they can love more wives and i accept that.
... ALLAH has the power to bring a man to his knees ... weak and unable to function ... paralysis ... death ... the first wife must condone within her heart ... only ALLAH knows her heart ... if her heart suffers, then her husband will be punished accordingly ...
Islam forbids to mock other people infact its haram and also to inflict harm and bully others is haram because its a bad work that makes you earn bad deeds
Inequity and oppression is haram Surat al-kahf (
(18:87) He said, "We will punish that one of them who will commit iniquity: then he shall be returned to his Lord and He will inflict on him a grievous torment:)
Even to be unfair to yourself is haram ,Surat al-amran (And those who, when they commit an immorality or wrong themselves [by transgression], remember Allah and seek forgiveness for their sins - and who can forgive sins except Allah? - and [who] do not persist in what they have done while they know.)
So its completly illogical after all of that to say that god encourages the opression of women , the verse that says hit women is falsely understood for arabic is a complicated language and one word can means many things (ضرب) means hit, multiply, boycott, and move far way from and the last meaning is the most logical one because in the following verse god speaks about reconciling between spouses and that believers should help them fix their relationship but it will be weird to say that after you hit your wife to make her obey you must make others help you reconcile with her like dude no one will help you with that ofc ! 🤦♀️
Enjoyment of earthly desires (money,women,..etc) in this temporary life is a sin and its also a test for believers , suart al amran ( Beautified for people is the love of that which they desire - of women and sons, heaped-up sums of gold and silver, fine branded horses, and cattle and tilled land. That is the enjoyment of worldly life, but Allah has with Him the best return)
So women are a part of the earthly desires of this temporary life so it wont make sense for god to say to men to stay away from the temporary earthly desires of this life time (women) in one verse and will tell them in other verses to go after them in the form of (polygamy, seggs slavery,..etc )
Also money ofc is part of the temporary desires of this life time so it wont make sense for god to forbid men from pursing temporary earthly desires (money) and then will tell these same men you should take more than women in inheritence (earthly temporary desires) beside god hates greediness and unfairness so as a result it wont be logical if god tell men to behave in such manner !
These behaviours( polygamy, seggs slavery, overtaking inheritence and over powering women and the weak )were acts of the infidels and islam came to fix them but those who have disease in their hearts wont change and wont follow god's path correctly and may go to the extent of altering the interpetation of god's words to earn that temporary earthly pleasure ( women,money,..etc )so its people not islam !
Al amran(It is He who has sent down to you, [O Muhammad], the Book; in it are verses [that are] precise - they are the foundation of the Book - and others unspecific. As for those in whose hearts is deviation [from truth], they will follow that of it which is unspecific, seeking discord and seeking an interpretation [suitable to them]. And no one knows its [true] interpretation except Allah. But those firm in knowledge say, "We believe in it. All [of it] is from our Lord." And no one will be reminded except those of understanding.)
I really hope this will help you and will open your eyes to the truth ❤
Assalamualaikum, 5 months before my husband got another marriage & gifted property to his brother, without inform me,and not provide any maintenance i have 8 yrs daughter. can u please tell us.
You can divorce him if he doesn’t take care of you financially.
If he is taking care of ur family expense and if he still cares for you,then just live with him,
@@sabi56847 He is not take care me & my daughter. he got another marriage & block me.he gifted property to his brother.
@@HA-jq1munot always the advise to give u know I’m sure she knows that. But if he’s not providing and she struggling what do u think will happen to her after.?
@@MessiWorldCup-th2de she can marry someone else or go back to her father. There’s no point being married to a person who doesn’t provide for his family
We live in wild times. Its hard enough to get one wife these days let alone two. Marriage has gotten lot harder even though its not supposed to be that hard.
Modern women are influenced from western values have become more entitled, expecting everything from their men when they have nothing to offer in return. They prefer career over marriage. Parents use their children as bargaining chips to get more dowry from each other and seal the deal with the highest bidder.
Marriage now has become a business where bride and groom have a price tag . Monetary benefits are more important than character.
FEAR ALLAH AKHIN, title is misleading
I thought u meant can a wife physically stop his husband etc
THE QUESTION asked to mufti Menk was different tho
It was about adding a clause in the contract
Marrying someone same age like your daughter I finding it unbelievable and at the same time talking about it just to mock your actual wife is a terrible thing specially Some man always say I have a right to marry 4 wives and you don’t pray 5 times a day 😂😂😂
Most women against polygamy are either already married or still young. Go check up on women in their late 30s and 40s, I've seen staunch feminists who swore never to "settle", settle down as a 3rd or 4th wife. Maybe when you fall into such a situation, you will understand the hikmah and wisdom behind Allah's decree
Key word, "settle". Women will never truly be happy in this arrangement.
Always been an emotive subject however we must always fear Allah azza wa jal in all matters. So much emotion and comments based on people’s opinion only, never making any reference to Quran and Sunnah. Be careful with your comments as often it is better to remain silent that make a comment that is a Bid’ah or haram.
Please can someone answer why not mention Surah 66 At-Tahrim? : "O Prophet! Why do you prohibit ˹yourself˺ from what Allah has made lawful to you, seeking to please your wives? And Allah is All-Forgiving, Most Merciful." ... "Perhaps, if he were to divorce you ˹all˺, his Lord would replace you with better wives who are submissive ˹to Allah˺, faithful ˹to Him˺, devout, repentant, dedicated to worship and fasting-previously married or virgins."
But in our culture men don't give same rights to his wife's just the say that Allah give him wright 4marrigs but Allah told that if u don't able to give the same right to each wife u have to do just one
But yahan pr admi shadi krne k lia to shariyat ka hawala date han lakn insaf k wkt Allah k Ahkamat bhol jate han
Assalamualaikum as in Hadees the number of wives ur rizq will increase