No. They gave their child a great gift and instead of appreciating it, he got married to a foreign student who cant make any money and caused his rent to double. He didn't appreciate the gift so if he wants to get married then he can pay for his own car.
They didn't call the car that was purchased a "beater". The expensive purchase replaced the affordable car he would have bought if he were making his own decisions.
@@mayharmon6948 no you heard that wrong., he did cal;l the car theyre talking about that has 20k left on the note " a beater" this guy/ kid is spoiled. yeah make him pay it
@@freespeech9515maybe thank Mom and Dad for gifting him use of the car that they paid all the payments on for however long. They gifted him a lease, probably the best on the planet if for some reason by condition or mileage the car is worth less than the note.
My father insisted that he buy a modest home for me because he said it made good financial sense and that he talked to his attorney and CPA. He said that he would charge me rent which I paid faithfully every month and that upon his death, the house would be given to me with no mortgage. He gave me a budget and told me to go look for a house. So I did, and I paid him rent for 6 years until his death. About a year before he passed, he out of the blue said, "Lisa, you know that I can take the house away from you and sell it." It was a comment that was so unexpected and unwarranted I was shocked. So I quietly said, "Well, you've pulled the rug out from under me before so ok. Tell me when you want me out and I'll get out." There was no fight or arguing. No other words were discussed about it. If he had mentioned it again, I would have scheduled a date with him to be out of the house. The reason I'm telling this story is think really hard before you let your parents do anything financial for you. They can hold it over your head and it is all about control. If I had to do my situation again, I never would have let my father buy the house. It put me in a weakened position and I knew better than to do it, but he talked me into it and I allowed it to happen. I'm still in the house years later and life is good. I am grateful for my father's gift. Just be careful. You'll feel much better if you don't get into financial situations with your parents or even friends. Rely on yourself and don't get enmeshed in this kind of stuff.
Have to be careful... Lesson learned. Thank Goodness he didn't follow through and it worked out for you. My wife had a situation where her father conned her out of her life savings. Over $100k before we got married. Her uncle scammed her brother out of a bunch of money. Never do deals with family. I'm kind of a lone wolf so I like to do everything myself anyway. I've seen others fall into traps my entire life. Never do deals with family or friends.
Nah, more like the parents know he is getting paid big from the wife, market average green card wife paying 50 to 80k depends on the living condition and the husbands condition
100% what it is. If you have enough money to feed a mail-order bride, then you can afford a car payment. She's going to dip as soon as her papers come in. Sorry kid, you're screwed
This irks me. We had a situation like this where we were gifted some property then parent wanted it back. Just because they’re your parents, they DO NOT own you! I feel for this young man. We actually called in to the Dave Ramsey Show and you guys helped us navigate this difficult situation, so thank you!
Glad you got out of that mess! If you're gifting something....it should be within your budget and in cold, hard CASH!! You cannot gift someone something that you don't own, otherwise it's still a liability and will become one if things go sideways (like this case).
More to the story is in-law is an alcoholic and wanted it back to spend on stupid things. This was gifted to us by late grandfather and my hubby was written into the will to become heir of property. This property was an inheritance for our kids, long story short we got it back after a fight. It was so hard to deal with someone that isn’t mentally stable and would be a bad steward of property. He has since stolen land from my husband and sold it too, so all around not a good guy. Thank you Ramseys team!
@@thebeegood1731 you can't give a gift you don't own. The bank still owns that car from a practical view point. Which is why I'm certain the kid doesn't have the title. He's just coming to realize the truth: parents gave him a free lease of their car and now they don't want to do that anymore. Parents did nothing wrong. Give them their car back or pay to keep it.
I've seen this story waaay too many times. My ex wife's dad bought a her a brand new car while we were dating. Then when we got married they tried to convince me we should pay it off (mind you I was the only one working full time in the marriage with no kids). I told them absolutely not, and that I didn't pick that car out. If I chose the car it would be something we could afford. Parents do not set your kids up for failure like this. Im 30 now and seen plenty of my friends fall into this trap in the past decade.
No. They gave their child a great gift and instead of appreciating it, he got married to a foreign student who cant make any money and caused his rent to double. He didn't appreciate the gift so if he wants to get married then he can pay for his own car.
@@BeyondTigerMilk how does marrying a foreign student directly show lack of appreciation of a gift? Trust me, I also think it's a stupid decision, but the parents are not in the right either. They shouldn't have gotten a car loan if they were trying to "gift" their son with a new car. It would have been better for everyone involved if they just paid like $8k in cash for an old car. Now the parents are stuck with a car and are under water with a car loan and the son has no car. Everyone's a loser in this scenario.
I guess he'd have to sign over the title as well. Maybe it's still with the lender? If I were him, I'd be 100% sure my name was not on any document associated with the car.
@@mayharmon6948 The car isn't in the caller's name, it's in his parents' name. And now that he's married, they want him to make the payments on it. Since it's not in his name, he can just return the "gift" and let them deal with it.
@@alycewich4472 That seems to be correct from what they say. Assuming he's legally free, you're right. He should just hand them the keys. Of course, he may then have the problem of how to get around...I guess he'll need a solution to that before giving his parents his current ride.
I can guarantee you...he wanted to keep the car and still have his parents pay for it. He didn't need to call into the show... it's simple, it's their car, give it back to them.
This might be a thing. My parents were similar. They would help their adult kids financially (if in school) but only until they married. If you decide to marry, you have to stand on your own. No more financial help. Not a spite thing because this was communicated before anyone was even in the picture. We just always knew that was their boundary.
Same here. My parents insisted that married people depend on each other, not on their parents. We knew what would happen when we crossed that bridge. My sister acted like my parents abandoned her. I don't know if she's ever gotten over it.
That is some shady nonsense! If i was to gift someone a car it would be paid or with cash and you would hand them the title, not some long term payment plan. I would give them the vehicle back and say thanks for nothing.
Finance companies don't let you borrow money for cars you don't own. The car was never titled to the kid in the first place. He's just been able to drive it for free fit however long. He got a free lease. Thank the parents and give them their car back.
If you're gifting something....it should be within your budget and in cold, hard CASH!! You cannot gift someone something that you don't own, otherwise it's still a liability and will become one if things go sideways (like this case).
Maybe. I have seen this with people who accept "gifts" from parents (many years in prayer groups, ha ha). One girl shared that her parents were buying her a car. When we suggested that she have her parents register it in her name, she told us that her parents were registering it in their name to "save" her from paying high insurance rates. Another married couple lived in a run-down fixer upper house that were bought by parents for them--the mortgage was in the parents' name "for tax reasons," and the agreement was to fix up the house over three years and the title would be transferred over to them. The girl who accepted the car ("I really need a car") had it held over her head whenever her parents did not like her life choices. The married couple fixed up the house and made it their own, expecting to keep it. In two years the parents decided to sell it out from under them to "make a profit." When the parents offered them a "better" house with the same deal, they turned them down and eventually bought their own home.
@@user-mv9tt4st9k My parents co-signed on my junker first car when I was 19. I know they are there if I need help. They've offered a time or two, but I'm hardworking and too proud to take money from them. I was raised that way. .And I live within my means. One of my parents friends who is retired is alwats complaining to my parents that he doesn't have any money or savings. I just found out that the real story is that he has a 1200.00/mo car payment. I guess he better get used to living in his car if he wants to eat. He's already maxed out 5 credit cards and won't listen to anyone.
My parents did something similar they paid money for propane after a hurricane (Maria in PR) since my daughter NEEDED the electricity for her medical equipment as a gift to support me because I had to moved to US when things went downhill. A few months later to help me get on my feet I decided I will sell the generator and my dad said it was on his property therefore he will not allow anyone there. So he proposed to buy it from me. Ask for the sale price when I give it to him he deducted “the gift” and paid me a few hundred dollars. Instead of the $2k I was asking. Since then I repaired my relationship with them but I have not accepted a cent and never will. I could be starving and they will NEVER know.
They helped you twice. Your situation is nothing like this guys. I don’t blame them for not wanting you to sell it when they bought it. Yes, you shouldn’t take anything else from them either.
A generator is a good thing to have, even if your daughter no longer has the medical equipment, and especially if she still uses the medical equipment. I lost power for a full day last week and have neighbors who have been without power for a week.
@@1978wisperThe generator is personal property purchased by the son. I'm not sure why you aren't getting that. I am curious why he didn't just say no thank you and sell the generator. Conversation should have went, Dad, it's my generator. If you want it, that'll be $2000, not $200. I had no intention of paying you back for supporting your granddaughter. I mean if that's your truth, go for it. Personally I'd be grateful for the gift turned free loan and accept the $200 graciously. A parents job is to prepare kids to be independent and take care of their own kids.
A car loan is not a “gift”. The dude’s parents are effed up. They got underwater on the car not him. He can’t afford that car. He needs to tell them to keep their car and keep their loan.
Decades ago my dad, a mechanic by trade since he was a teenager, did the same thing to me. He told me that we could get a beater and he would fix it up for me for $2500. Long story short that beater ended up being "gifted" to me for $5,000. Even fixed up it wasn't worth that. I gave it back. Dad was not happy and started taking it out on my kids since I was ignoring his digs. Long story short. I left the family as I wasn't going to have my father treat my kids that way. Hard to do but it worked out for the best.
thats a really good idea from George i didn't think of that , dont just refuse to pay it just say ok i dont want to be responsible for it so i dont want the car anymore
Sell the car and start using public transportation. Oh wait... It is not his car, even better. Return the car to the parents and start using public transportation--starting with the walk from their home to the nearest bus stop after returning the car. If the loan is in the parents' names, it cannot be transferred without signatures. Tell the parents to pound sand.
Thankfully I didn't fall into this trap with my parents. My parents didn't want to "help" me with anything. Unfortunately my sister got fooled and she is in serious debt because my parents pulled the rug from her with her college, car and insurance.
My mother in law gave "gifts" to two daughters (of 3 total) while she was alive. One of the "gifts" was a wedding present for my sister in law. Upon MIL passing, she arranged her will so the amount she gifted was deducted from the 3 way split of her estate. (So everyone got different amounts but equal in total after the earlier gifts). On the one hand, at least she left something. But my sister in law just stated "well, i guess i just paid for my wedding gift from her". Yep. 😂. This video reminded me of that.
@@BeyondTigerMilk How so? The video was about a parent "gifting" their kid a car, then foisting a monthly payment on them. I have a different approach with my kids. Totally relevant.
This happrned to me. Stepfather wanted to grandstand and look like mr wonderful by "giving" me a truck, even though I worked for it. Then he tried taking it back! That was the end of our contact.
I have a similar situation where my dad pay for my lease a few years back and to this day he wants to control my bank account and say that I still own him money.
Parental manipulation. They 'gift' something, then whisk it away, presumably because they are displeased with some of his choices. It becomes a control tool by them. Drive the car to their place, hand them the keys, let them deal with it, get out of the deal/"gift" asap. It sucks to be broke. But it sucks even more if emotional vampires swoop in to take advantage of that.
Thank them for the generosity. Provide them with the car back. Pay cash, buy a $3000 car... or not, depending on where you live, you may not need a car immediately. Save cash.
They're just one of the millions of debt junkies buying crap they can't afford. The whole thing is just insane. Imagine taking out a loan to go Christmas shopping
I've seen it so many times with my friends. A parent takes out a loan on a $30k car and then pays for 2 years and flips this on them. But they took all the praise and thank yous in the beginning.
my dad does this. gifts us a car.... the moment we piss him off its taken away. so it was never mine. same with working for him. he will just scream and fire you, skips paying a paycheck and then the next week im hired again. a roller coaster... got a different job
Treating your kids like what? Giving them a 20k car with the only stipulation being they don't get married to a foreign person who can't make money and also causes his housing to double while he's in college? If this guy can get married he doesn't need the gift car from his parents any more.
Do not, I repeat, do not commingle major financial decisions/purchases with anybody else unless they are your spouse. Co-signing, promised gifts like this, all that crap Is a nightmare waiting to happen. You're one of the lucky ones if it doesn't go wrong. Don't risk it.
Gifting the car to him violated the terms of their loan. You can't give away the security on a loan. I expect they didn't actually give it to him and just let him use it. In which case, they are welcome to take it back and do with it as they please. They should never have called it a gift when it wasn't, though.
His parents probably feel that they were supporting him so that he could attend school, but then he got married and is now supporting someone else while they're still supporting him. They don't like that.
If "big boy thinks he's an adult now" factors into their decision matrix, then they were too broke to gift him the car in the first place. This is a very toxic reaction to a bad financial decision that THEY made
Dave would have remembered to ask whose name the car is in. If it’s in his name, he should just keep driving it around until the repo man shows up. The parents gave a gift, the car is his and the debt is theirs. If it’s their car, he should drive it around until they demand it back. In no case should he take on any of the debt. He’d be better off letting them take the loss and he starts fresh.
@@mayharmon6948 Agreed. Probably the parents like to use their money to provide a certain level of control over their kids. Very rarely do large gifts come with no strings attached.
@@mayharmon6948 there is no evidence this kid was stuck with anything but a free car. You're assuming the parents won't take the car back in lieu of payments. Caller is complaining about taking over payments, but never said he was willing to give back the car. The recommendation to him was right, but I'll bet it's not what he wanted to hear. Kid wants to keep the car and have parents keep paying for it.
How about everyone lay off the parents and reframe the issue correctly. Parents did gift the kid a free lease on this newer, nicer vehicle and clearly never transferred the debt in his name. Who knows why they don't want to pay it anymore, and yes the recommendation was correct. Give the car back and buy your own car. But for the love of God, be grateful to your parents that bought a car and paid all the payments so you could use it for however long. Maybe you should have gotten your finances in order before you got hitched to the even greater responsibility of marriage. Just a thought. Either way get off the entitlement train and say thank you to your parents whom haven't hurt, unless they are unwilling to accept the car back. So far nobody said that was the situation.
Why “gift” your kid a $20,000++ car and get a loan for it?!? The parents could have just gotten him a beater and paid it in full so it wouldn’t have become a financial burden to all of them. Either the parents didn’t think this through or that caller isn’t being truthful. He could have said to them, “Hey mom and dad, I’m happy with just a beater that’s fully paid.” He might have thought well since his parents were “gifting” it to him, he might as well choose a new expensive one. But I doubt he didn’t know that his parents took out a loan for it. Both him and his parents didn’t think carefully and now they have a mess.
Used car for $5 or $6 grand? He makes $1,700 a month. That is about three months salary or 25% of his yearly salary if quits eating and lives in a cardboard box. 🤣🤣
That's a double failure on the parents part. One for gifting a car and later trying to make him pay for his gift. Two for going into debt in the first place for it. I had my mom and step dad do a similar thing to me on my 18th birthday. They presented me with a $4000 Toyota as a birthday present, key in the birthday card and all, but gave me the $2000 in debt and emptied my $1000 in savings. Granted, it was nice to give me the $1000 to help me buy a car. But don't get me to sign papers for $2000 in debt by getting me excites for a fake birthday present. I didn't realize how much of a mistake it was til a year later when they did the same to my sister, gifting $1000, but for a $1300 car that was a few years newer. I blame myself for it though for being a dumb 18 year old high-school kid. But I'm also thankful for that mistake as it gave me motivation to be debt free.
I wonder on calls like this how the parents would describe the situation from their perspective. Perhaps he misunderstood the initial offer. Perhaps they told him we will get you started with a car and you can take it over at some point but he didn't understand what they meant. Just playing Devil's Advocate.
It's hard to assume the other side of the story, but honestly the parents sound toxic. They're using this "gift" as a form of control over their adult child. They didn't let go when he left the nest and now they're being petty and spiteful about his supposedly bad decisions
I agree I would just take the car back and sell it I think he did make a mistake marrying so young with no money he should have finished school and have his career in order maybe that’s why they gave him the car
Maybe should have asked him the amount of their total income and resources. It may be that the wife has resources that are supporting them in addition to his low income.
There's definitely more going on with this story. Parents bought him a car. Son is living in campus housing. Son gets a girl friend who was probably on a visa to go to school. Girl makes son's toes curl so he thinks he's in love. Moves off campus and doesn't have the money to do so after parents probably said he doesn't have the money to do so. Parents say well if you're that grown to marry the first girl who curls your toes then it's time we cut the apron straps from home. Son made his decision, and yes he can tell parents to pack sand but as we all know it wouldn't be in his best interest to burn bridges with the people who supported him for 20+ years. Oh young love. He should have stayed focused on his studies, finished his degree, whilst the parents were still paying, after graduation marry the green card girl and live happily ever after with a car that's almost paid off. Shew that was a lot.
That is the silliest new trend of a come back. Try something more original. And by the way, who hurt you to cause you to leave such a pathetic come back? 😂@@Thurgor_Supreme
I rode public transportation to and from work for nearly fifteen years. Every month I would buy a bus pass and additional zone transfers. I had a true beater car for shopping, getting to church, etc. My mom once offered to give me $1,000.00 toward a down payment on a car. The deal was off when it was not the car she wanted me to have, I was in my twenties and figured it was a too good to be true offer. 😂
I think this is absolutely a spite thing. Parents who stop support after their child or children get married are absolutely horrendus, especially if both don't make the money to support the household. They're partially a reason why people don't want to bring a child into this world and then people wonder why the population can't be replaced.
@@Thurgor_Supreme Everything in life has strings attached! It's very naive to think otherwise. As a parent, I would do anything necessary to help my children IF AND ONLY IF they are doing the right things and are trying to better themselves. He's a college student, working part-time and decides to get married to an individual who doesn't have any means of providing for themselves. If he's grown enough to support this individual then he's grown enough to 100% support himself, as well! I really do wish him and his wife the best!
@@blessedabundantly9890 They can coach him and offer him life advice all they want, but manipulating him with something that was supposedly a gift is indeed a toxic relationship. Even if things don't work out with this girl and he inadvertently does everything his parents want, he should still park that pile of debt in their driveway, and then never accept a "gift" from them again
A car doesn't have to cost $5-6k, pretending for a minute he doubled his income and could actually afford to own a car there's plenty of decent used cars going under the auction hammer under $2k. And at that price hopefully they won't be tempted to waste money on full insurance or major repairs you just drive the thing to the ground and replace it after a few years. Anyways the math doesn't work living on $1700 unless your rent is $0 AND your vehicle is a huffy 10 speed of dubious ownership.
The parents are making him grow up. Sounds like he has been living off his parents and then he decided to pull a 90 day fiance move and the parents probably don't agree so now they want him to pay the car plus the fact that he only works PT😂
Oh, hell naw. Your parents didn't even gift you a car. Sounds like a the bank gave you the car and they paid payments. It's time to be a grown up and have a car payment? WTF? I'm 45 and haven't had a monthly car payment since I was 28. Been all cash since. Your parents sound like they need to grow up.
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He should give the car back to his parents and let them deal with it.
Did you watch the video? That’s what they said
That’s literally what was said in the video lol
@@JasonBlaha66 yeah I wanted it in full dumbo
That’s what I did when my uncle bought me a car and then tried to make me pay for it. I gave it right back.
Edit: “and car” to a car
@@acd1168 Good for you. I did the same when my dad did the same thing.
One of the biggest struggles in life is dealing with aging parents who continue to make poor decisions. They are hard headed and less rational.
Get the car back to them, sooner rather than later.
Transfer a liability as a "gift"? Nasty work.
They can't afford it anymore.
No. They gave their child a great gift and instead of appreciating it, he got married to a foreign student who cant make any money and caused his rent to double. He didn't appreciate the gift so if he wants to get married then he can pay for his own car.
@@BeyondTigerMilkOK, Dad
@@BeyondTigerMilkno. I hope he just leaves the car with them so they have to deal with it.
That is not a gift if they want him to pay it.
A 20k car is not a beater. All used cars are not beaters.
They didn't call the car that was purchased a "beater". The expensive purchase replaced the affordable car he would have bought if he were making his own decisions.
He called his car a beater.
@@mayharmon6948 no you heard that wrong., he did cal;l the car theyre talking about that has 20k left on the note " a beater" this guy/ kid is spoiled. yeah make him pay it
@@mayharmon6948 The caller did.
@@autumnjerene He did not have a car.
Is it in his name? Drive over there, park the car in their driveway, hand them the keys, say thanks but no thanks, then walk away.
It is in the parents' name.
Voluntary regift 😂
Why thank them to begin with?
@@freespeech9515maybe thank Mom and Dad for gifting him use of the car that they paid all the payments on for however long. They gifted him a lease, probably the best on the planet if for some reason by condition or mileage the car is worth less than the note.
@@pkmcnett5649Yes as the person said, park the car and walk off.
My father insisted that he buy a modest home for me because he said it made good financial sense and that he talked to his attorney and CPA. He said that he would charge me rent which I paid faithfully every month and that upon his death, the house would be given to me with no mortgage. He gave me a budget and told me to go look for a house. So I did, and I paid him rent for 6 years until his death. About a year before he passed, he out of the blue said, "Lisa, you know that I can take the house away from you and sell it." It was a comment that was so unexpected and unwarranted I was shocked. So I quietly said, "Well, you've pulled the rug out from under me before so ok. Tell me when you want me out and I'll get out." There was no fight or arguing. No other words were discussed about it. If he had mentioned it again, I would have scheduled a date with him to be out of the house. The reason I'm telling this story is think really hard before you let your parents do anything financial for you. They can hold it over your head and it is all about control. If I had to do my situation again, I never would have let my father buy the house. It put me in a weakened position and I knew better than to do it, but he talked me into it and I allowed it to happen. I'm still in the house years later and life is good. I am grateful for my father's gift. Just be careful. You'll feel much better if you don't get into financial situations with your parents or even friends. Rely on yourself and don't get enmeshed in this kind of stuff.
He didn't do anything for you until he actually gave you the house. Promises aren't gifts.
Have to be careful...
Lesson learned. Thank Goodness he didn't follow through and it worked out for you.
My wife had a situation where her father conned her out of her life savings. Over $100k before we got married.
Her uncle scammed her brother out of a bunch of money.
Never do deals with family.
I'm kind of a lone wolf so I like to do everything myself anyway.
I've seen others fall into traps my entire life. Never do deals with family or friends.
Your experience was getting into a dumb deal, not relevant to trusting parents. Of the car is in his name they CANT do anything about it.
They disapprove of his green card wife.
Seems obvious...if he a student, why he rushing into marriage....guess he was "convinced"
Nah, more like the parents know he is getting paid big from the wife, market average green card wife paying 50 to 80k depends on the living condition and the husbands condition
Clearly
100% what it is. If you have enough money to feed a mail-order bride, then you can afford a car payment. She's going to dip as soon as her papers come in. Sorry kid, you're screwed
Yup...that's what it is.
This irks me. We had a situation like this where we were gifted some property then parent wanted it back. Just because they’re your parents, they DO NOT own you! I feel for this young man. We actually called in to the Dave Ramsey Show and you guys helped us navigate this difficult situation, so thank you!
Why did they want it back? Was there some financial event?
The only gift I allow my family members to give me is a hug, aside from birthday or Christmas gifts within reason.
Glad you got out of that mess! If you're gifting something....it should be within your budget and in cold, hard CASH!! You cannot gift someone something that you don't own, otherwise it's still a liability and will become one if things go sideways (like this case).
More to the story is in-law is an alcoholic and wanted it back to spend on stupid things. This was gifted to us by late grandfather and my hubby was written into the will to become heir of property. This property was an inheritance for our kids, long story short we got it back after a fight. It was so hard to deal with someone that isn’t mentally stable and would be a bad steward of property. He has since stolen land from my husband and sold it too, so all around not a good guy. Thank you Ramseys team!
@@thebeegood1731 you can't give a gift you don't own. The bank still owns that car from a practical view point. Which is why I'm certain the kid doesn't have the title. He's just coming to realize the truth: parents gave him a free lease of their car and now they don't want to do that anymore. Parents did nothing wrong. Give them their car back or pay to keep it.
Good advice. Give the car back to them. This is the reason why I don't do business with family members.
I've seen this story waaay too many times. My ex wife's dad bought a her a brand new car while we were dating. Then when we got married they tried to convince me we should pay it off (mind you I was the only one working full time in the marriage with no kids). I told them absolutely not, and that I didn't pick that car out. If I chose the car it would be something we could afford. Parents do not set your kids up for failure like this. Im 30 now and seen plenty of my friends fall into this trap in the past decade.
No. They gave their child a great gift and instead of appreciating it, he got married to a foreign student who cant make any money and caused his rent to double. He didn't appreciate the gift so if he wants to get married then he can pay for his own car.
@@BeyondTigerMilk that’s not a gift. That’s a curse with conditions. They don’t get to control his life
@@Shortballa11 yawn. It's not a curse. Just because you think everything should be free doesn't mean that's the way it is
@@BeyondTigerMilk it’s a curse because it’s a car payment that he can’t afford. And yes a gift is free. If it’s not don’t give him the car at all.
@@BeyondTigerMilk how does marrying a foreign student directly show lack of appreciation of a gift? Trust me, I also think it's a stupid decision, but the parents are not in the right either. They shouldn't have gotten a car loan if they were trying to "gift" their son with a new car. It would have been better for everyone involved if they just paid like $8k in cash for an old car. Now the parents are stuck with a car and are under water with a car loan and the son has no car. Everyone's a loser in this scenario.
I’d park the car in their driveway and hand them the keys
I guess he'd have to sign over the title as well. Maybe it's still with the lender? If I were him, I'd be 100% sure my name was not on any document associated with the car.
@@mayharmon6948 The car isn't in the caller's name, it's in his parents' name. And now that he's married, they want him to make the payments on it. Since it's not in his name, he can just return the "gift" and let them deal with it.
@@alycewich4472 That seems to be correct from what they say. Assuming he's legally free, you're right. He should just hand them the keys. Of course, he may then have the problem of how to get around...I guess he'll need a solution to that before giving his parents his current ride.
I can guarantee you...he wanted to keep the car and still have his parents pay for it. He didn't need to call into the show... it's simple, it's their car, give it back to them.
This might be a thing. My parents were similar. They would help their adult kids financially (if in school) but only until they married. If you decide to marry, you have to stand on your own. No more financial help. Not a spite thing because this was communicated before anyone was even in the picture. We just always knew that was their boundary.
Same here. My parents insisted that married people depend on each other, not on their parents. We knew what would happen when we crossed that bridge. My sister acted like my parents abandoned her. I don't know if she's ever gotten over it.
If the parents didnt hand over the car title to you upon receipt... It is not a gift.
It is really that simple.
I would love to see the looks on the parents faces when he tells him he wants to give it back to them.
Kid never got to ask his question!
Ramsey Solutions' "commercials" must be more important 🤷♂️
That is some shady nonsense! If i was to gift someone a car it would be paid or with cash and you would hand them the title, not some long term payment plan. I would give them the vehicle back and say thanks for nothing.
If someone offers me a car they are still making payments on I'm not taking it. It's the bank's car not theirs.
Finance companies don't let you borrow money for cars you don't own. The car was never titled to the kid in the first place. He's just been able to drive it for free fit however long. He got a free lease. Thank the parents and give them their car back.
I offered to buy my 24-year old son a car, for cash. He said "no way, you're not buying me a car!" Good man.
If you're gifting something....it should be within your budget and in cold, hard CASH!! You cannot gift someone something that you don't own, otherwise it's still a liability and will become one if things go sideways (like this case).
Some people could be quite well off financially and still decide to pay for a car on a loan instead of outright with cash.
I'd tell them that's too damn bad. And I'd let them keep the car and buy my own.
There is always more than meets the eye. Definitely more to the story.
Maybe. I have seen this with people who accept "gifts" from parents (many years in prayer groups, ha ha). One girl shared that her parents were buying her a car. When we suggested that she have her parents register it in her name, she told us that her parents were registering it in their name to "save" her from paying high insurance rates. Another married couple lived in a run-down fixer upper house that were bought by parents for them--the mortgage was in the parents' name "for tax reasons," and the agreement was to fix up the house over three years and the title would be transferred over to them.
The girl who accepted the car ("I really need a car") had it held over her head whenever her parents did not like her life choices.
The married couple fixed up the house and made it their own, expecting to keep it. In two years the parents decided to sell it out from under them to "make a profit." When the parents offered them a "better" house with the same deal, they turned them down and eventually bought their own home.
@@user-mv9tt4st9k
My parents co-signed on my junker first car when I was 19. I know they are there if I need help. They've offered a time or two, but I'm hardworking and too proud to take money from them. I was raised that way. .And I live within my means. One of my parents friends who is retired is alwats complaining to my parents that he doesn't have any money or savings. I just found out that the real story is that he has a 1200.00/mo car payment. I guess he better get used to living in his car if he wants to eat. He's already maxed out 5 credit cards and won't listen to anyone.
My parents did something similar they paid money for propane after a hurricane (Maria in PR) since my daughter NEEDED the electricity for her medical equipment as a gift to support me because I had to moved to US when things went downhill. A few months later to help me get on my feet I decided I will sell the generator and my dad said it was on his property therefore he will not allow anyone there. So he proposed to buy it from me. Ask for the sale price when I give it to him he deducted “the gift” and paid me a few hundred dollars. Instead of the $2k I was asking. Since then I repaired my relationship with them but I have not accepted a cent and never will. I could be starving and they will NEVER know.
They helped you twice. Your situation is nothing like this guys. I don’t blame them for not wanting you to sell it when they bought it. Yes, you shouldn’t take anything else from them either.
@@1978wisperI bought the generator and paid for installation and everything. But I was renting an apartment they own so it was installed there.
A generator is a good thing to have, even if your daughter no longer has the medical equipment, and especially if she still uses the medical equipment. I lost power for a full day last week and have neighbors who have been without power for a week.
@@francoral if it was installed in their apartment that’s all the more reason they wanted it left there. You did not pay for it your parent did.
@@1978wisperThe generator is personal property purchased by the son. I'm not sure why you aren't getting that. I am curious why he didn't just say no thank you and sell the generator. Conversation should have went, Dad, it's my generator. If you want it, that'll be $2000, not $200. I had no intention of paying you back for supporting your granddaughter. I mean if that's your truth, go for it. Personally I'd be grateful for the gift turned free loan and accept the $200 graciously. A parents job is to prepare kids to be independent and take care of their own kids.
A car loan is not a “gift”. The dude’s parents are effed up. They got underwater on the car not him. He can’t afford that car. He needs to tell them to keep their car and keep their loan.
Decades ago my dad, a mechanic by trade since he was a teenager, did the same thing to me. He told me that we could get a beater and he would fix it up for me for $2500. Long story short that beater ended up being "gifted" to me for $5,000. Even fixed up it wasn't worth that. I gave it back. Dad was not happy and started taking it out on my kids since I was ignoring his digs.
Long story short. I left the family as I wasn't going to have my father treat my kids that way. Hard to do but it worked out for the best.
As the saying goes, sometimes a gift can become a curse....
$470 for a car payment worth only $16k. That’s not a gift 🎁
thats a really good idea from George i didn't think of that , dont just refuse to pay it just say ok i dont want to be responsible for it so i dont want the car anymore
Sell the car and start using public transportation. Oh wait... It is not his car, even better. Return the car to the parents and start using public transportation--starting with the walk from their home to the nearest bus stop after returning the car.
If the loan is in the parents' names, it cannot be transferred without signatures. Tell the parents to pound sand.
Thankfully I didn't fall into this trap with my parents. My parents didn't want to "help" me with anything. Unfortunately my sister got fooled and she is in serious debt because my parents pulled the rug from her with her college, car and insurance.
Easiest fix on the show I've heard, they want the gift back so hand it back. Lesson being don't accept any more gifts from them.
My mother in law gave "gifts" to two daughters (of 3 total) while she was alive. One of the "gifts" was a wedding present for my sister in law.
Upon MIL passing, she arranged her will so the amount she gifted was deducted from the 3 way split of her estate. (So everyone got different amounts but equal in total after the earlier gifts).
On the one hand, at least she left something.
But my sister in law just stated "well, i guess i just paid for my wedding gift from her".
Yep. 😂.
This video reminded me of that.
It's crazy that people do stuff like that. A gift is a gift.
Here i am giving my kids a one time gift of 10k to get a car. If they want to chip in to get something above 10k then go for it.
Ok. Completely irrelevant to the video.
@@BeyondTigerMilk How so? The video was about a parent "gifting" their kid a car, then foisting a monthly payment on them. I have a different approach with my kids. Totally relevant.
Yep, assuming when my kid becomes an adult, I would easily do that.
This happrned to me.
Stepfather wanted to grandstand and look like mr wonderful by "giving" me a truck, even though I worked for it. Then he tried taking it back!
That was the end of our contact.
"My parents repo'd my car ...that they gifted me in the first place"
Unbelievable
The bank gifted it. His parents are broke.
I have a similar situation where my dad pay for my lease a few years back and to this day he wants to control my bank account and say that I still own him money.
Give him every penny he paid back to shut him up.
I agree give it back. They played you hard. Messed up.
Parental manipulation. They 'gift' something, then whisk it away, presumably because they are displeased with some of his choices. It becomes a control tool by them.
Drive the car to their place, hand them the keys, let them deal with it, get out of the deal/"gift" asap.
It sucks to be broke. But it sucks even more if emotional vampires swoop in to take advantage of that.
Sounds like some 90 day fiance shit.. definitely need to hear the parents side
yea the parents clearly don't approve of the foreign wife
Thank them for the generosity.
Provide them with the car back.
Pay cash, buy a $3000 car... or not, depending on where you live, you may not need a car immediately.
Save cash.
How was it a gift if they didn’t pay for it cash? 😂
They're just one of the millions of debt junkies buying crap they can't afford. The whole thing is just insane. Imagine taking out a loan to go Christmas shopping
@@Thurgor_Supreme people do it every year! This country is screwed
They were just trying to get rid of that car payment. And they thought that he would just pay it and not say nothing. They need to pay that loan.
Parents: "Here's a car that you can take over the payments on. It's a gift from us!"
This is genuinely disgusting. Imagine treating your kids this way. Some parents dont deserve kids.
I've seen it so many times with my friends. A parent takes out a loan on a $30k car and then pays for 2 years and flips this on them. But they took all the praise and thank yous in the beginning.
my dad does this. gifts us a car.... the moment we piss him off its taken away. so it was never mine. same with working for him. he will just scream and fire you, skips paying a paycheck and then the next week im hired again. a roller coaster... got a different job
Treating your kids like what? Giving them a 20k car with the only stipulation being they don't get married to a foreign person who can't make money and also causes his housing to double while he's in college? If this guy can get married he doesn't need the gift car from his parents any more.
@@BeyondTigerMilk that’s not a gift. And he is gonna give the car back just like Dave advised.
@@Shortballa11 Dave wasn't on this one. It's still a gift it just has strings attached. You would understand if you had children.
Do not, I repeat, do not commingle major financial decisions/purchases with anybody else unless they are your spouse.
Co-signing, promised gifts like this, all that crap Is a nightmare waiting to happen. You're one of the lucky ones if it doesn't go wrong. Don't risk it.
Gifting the car to him violated the terms of their loan. You can't give away the security on a loan. I expect they didn't actually give it to him and just let him use it. In which case, they are welcome to take it back and do with it as they please. They should never have called it a gift when it wasn't, though.
When he did not receive title of the car, the gift is use of the car for free.
The caller is a dope smoker.
His parents probably feel that they were supporting him so that he could attend school, but then he got married and is now supporting someone else while they're still supporting him. They don't like that.
If "big boy thinks he's an adult now" factors into their decision matrix, then they were too broke to gift him the car in the first place. This is a very toxic reaction to a bad financial decision that THEY made
Dave would have remembered to ask whose name the car is in. If it’s in his name, he should just keep driving it around until the repo man shows up. The parents gave a gift, the car is his and the debt is theirs. If it’s their car, he should drive it around until they demand it back.
In no case should he take on any of the debt. He’d be better off letting them take the loss and he starts fresh.
They are asking him to take over the payment because they are not happy with how he is living his life. Need the parent’s side of the story.
Even if that's true, this is not the way to deal with it. Taking on a loan to "give a gift" is a dumb idea actually.
@@mayharmon6948 Agreed. Probably the parents like to use their money to provide a certain level of control over their kids. Very rarely do large gifts come with no strings attached.
Student, but married a lady looking for a green card🤔
@@mayharmon6948 there is no evidence this kid was stuck with anything but a free car. You're assuming the parents won't take the car back in lieu of payments. Caller is complaining about taking over payments, but never said he was willing to give back the car. The recommendation to him was right, but I'll bet it's not what he wanted to hear. Kid wants to keep the car and have parents keep paying for it.
Tough shit. They gave a gift to a grown adult and signed a finance note with a bank. They did it, it’s their problem.
Sounds like parents don't want him to get married so young.
Bro married international for a reason 😅
@@randomrendered1856 I think he brought her home from his Mormon mission overseas.
@@devpav9880 mission failed successfully
It seems obvious those parents do not approve of that marriage. I agree with everyone who says they should give the car back to his parents.
Them parents are a piece of work.....
full time student working part time married to someone who can't work waiting for green card? seems like a poor life choice
Sometimes love hits you. 💕
…why? Sounds pretty normal for a college kid to be working part time and going to school full time and has a cool exotic finance to me …
@@HOLDXSTEEL It's normal, but not a good life choice.
@@Primitive_Code sounds like you guys have some unresolved stuff. See a therapist
He's in Salt Lake - he's probably Mormon. Many many marry young while in college - it's cultural for them
You can't even qualify for this loan assumption, agree letting your parents deal with the mess they created is the only way out.
“Here you go son, debt.”
Shame on the parents that pull this kind of bait & switch on their kids.
The keys are under the mat, come get it.
All this time watching Ramsey clips and I still have no idea what CRM is
Give it back to them. Why make it so complicated?
Convinced you? Accountability please
How about everyone lay off the parents and reframe the issue correctly. Parents did gift the kid a free lease on this newer, nicer vehicle and clearly never transferred the debt in his name. Who knows why they don't want to pay it anymore, and yes the recommendation was correct. Give the car back and buy your own car. But for the love of God, be grateful to your parents that bought a car and paid all the payments so you could use it for however long. Maybe you should have gotten your finances in order before you got hitched to the even greater responsibility of marriage. Just a thought. Either way get off the entitlement train and say thank you to your parents whom haven't hurt, unless they are unwilling to accept the car back. So far nobody said that was the situation.
My stepfather “gave” me a car when I turned 18, but he wouldn’t let me drive it.
Why “gift” your kid a $20,000++ car and get a loan for it?!? The parents could have just gotten him a beater and paid it in full so it wouldn’t have become a financial burden to all of them. Either the parents didn’t think this through or that caller isn’t being truthful. He could have said to them, “Hey mom and dad, I’m happy with just a beater that’s fully paid.” He might have thought well since his parents were “gifting” it to him, he might as well choose a new expensive one. But I doubt he didn’t know that his parents took out a loan for it. Both him and his parents didn’t think carefully and now they have a mess.
Used car for $5 or $6 grand? He makes $1,700 a month. That is about three months salary or 25% of his yearly salary if quits eating and lives in a cardboard box. 🤣🤣
If it's financed, the payment on a $5,000 car is like a hundred bucks a month.
@@mattorama 2:42
George said for him to save up and pay cash. It would take about 10 years to save that up given his expenses and income.
That's a double failure on the parents part. One for gifting a car and later trying to make him pay for his gift. Two for going into debt in the first place for it.
I had my mom and step dad do a similar thing to me on my 18th birthday. They presented me with a $4000 Toyota as a birthday present, key in the birthday card and all, but gave me the $2000 in debt and emptied my $1000 in savings.
Granted, it was nice to give me the $1000 to help me buy a car. But don't get me to sign papers for $2000 in debt by getting me excites for a fake birthday present.
I didn't realize how much of a mistake it was til a year later when they did the same to my sister, gifting $1000, but for a $1300 car that was a few years newer.
I blame myself for it though for being a dumb 18 year old high-school kid. But I'm also thankful for that mistake as it gave me motivation to be debt free.
Give the car back. Plain and simple
Passport papi. Hope it works out for the guy alot if times it blows up.
If it’s in their name stop paying and let their shit tank. Problem solved
I wonder on calls like this how the parents would describe the situation from their perspective. Perhaps he misunderstood the initial offer. Perhaps they told him we will get you started with a car and you can take it over at some point but he didn't understand what they meant. Just playing Devil's Advocate.
It's hard to assume the other side of the story, but honestly the parents sound toxic. They're using this "gift" as a form of control over their adult child. They didn't let go when he left the nest and now they're being petty and spiteful about his supposedly bad decisions
A beater is >20k? Hmm
He said instead of a beater. In other words, he was going to buy a beater but his parents offered to gift him a better car instead.
@@autumnjerene Thanks, didn't hear that part clearly
I have some really good parents man
I love debt, but I don't want you to get cars to go into debt. I prefer mortgage debt or debt on margin trading account
There problem. Now his problem to get transportation
His parents can't afford the car either.
I agree I would just take the car back and sell it I think he did make a mistake marrying so young with no money he should have finished school and have his career in order maybe that’s why they gave him the car
Maybe should have asked him the amount of their total income and resources. It may be that the wife has resources that are supporting them in addition to his low income.
There's definitely more going on with this story. Parents bought him a car. Son is living in campus housing. Son gets a girl friend who was probably on a visa to go to school. Girl makes son's toes curl so he thinks he's in love. Moves off campus and doesn't have the money to do so after parents probably said he doesn't have the money to do so. Parents say well if you're that grown to marry the first girl who curls your toes then it's time we cut the apron straps from home. Son made his decision, and yes he can tell parents to pack sand but as we all know it wouldn't be in his best interest to burn bridges with the people who supported him for 20+ years. Oh young love. He should have stayed focused on his studies, finished his degree, whilst the parents were still paying, after graduation marry the green card girl and live happily ever after with a car that's almost paid off. Shew that was a lot.
Who hurt you?
That is the silliest new trend of a come back. Try something more original. And by the way, who hurt you to cause you to leave such a pathetic come back? 😂@@Thurgor_Supreme
Well while I do think it wasn't right for his parents to immediately cut support, it's also a stupid decision that he got married this quickly.
It’s definitely in his best interest to tell them to pound sand
As much as I do think that he could've waited, I don't think it's okay for the parents to be so uptight about it. They should be supportive.
You don’t need a car.
Walk
Bicycle
Skateboard
Scooter
Uber
City bus
Greyhound bus
Light rail
Amtrak
Friends
Family
Craigslist ride share
Rental
I rode public transportation to and from work for nearly fifteen years. Every month I would buy a bus pass and additional zone transfers. I had a true beater car for shopping, getting to church, etc. My mom once offered to give me $1,000.00 toward a down payment on a car. The deal was off when it was not the car she wanted me to have, I was in my twenties and figured it was a too good to be true offer. 😂
If you live in a rural area, most of those things aren't options
Give them the car back. Why do they want to punish you?
I think this is absolutely a spite thing. Parents who stop support after their child or children get married are absolutely horrendus, especially if both don't make the money to support the household. They're partially a reason why people don't want to bring a child into this world and then people wonder why the population can't be replaced.
What kind of parents are these people! Strap your son with a car that is a gift and now want him to pay.
Ssems like the parents were supporting him financially and when he decided to get married and move out they decided to stop helping him.
If your gift has strings attached, then it's not a gift. Parents are toxic
@@Thurgor_Supreme Everything in life has strings attached! It's very naive to think otherwise. As a parent, I would do anything necessary to help my children IF AND ONLY IF they are doing the right things and are trying to better themselves. He's a college student, working part-time and decides to get married to an individual who doesn't have any means of providing for themselves. If he's grown enough to support this individual then he's grown enough to 100% support himself, as well!
I really do wish him and his wife the best!
@@blessedabundantly9890 They can coach him and offer him life advice all they want, but manipulating him with something that was supposedly a gift is indeed a toxic relationship. Even if things don't work out with this girl and he inadvertently does everything his parents want, he should still park that pile of debt in their driveway, and then never accept a "gift" from them again
A car doesn't have to cost $5-6k, pretending for a minute he doubled his income and could actually afford to own a car there's plenty of decent used cars going under the auction hammer under $2k. And at that price hopefully they won't be tempted to waste money on full insurance or major repairs you just drive the thing to the ground and replace it after a few years.
Anyways the math doesn't work living on $1700 unless your rent is $0 AND your vehicle is a huffy 10 speed of dubious ownership.
Toxic parenting some ppl shouldn’t parent
this dude is spoiled as hell. he called it a beater and it still has 20k left on the note. wooooooooooooooow a beater is 5k or less
"Gifting" something that isnt even actually paid for 😂.. "hey here is a gift of some debt"!
They didn't gift him debt ... Did they?
The parents are making him grow up. Sounds like he has been living off his parents and then he decided to pull a 90 day fiance move and the parents probably don't agree so now they want him to pay the car plus the fact that he only works PT😂
Just buy the car you actually want and give them that piece of trash right back
Suck it up either give it to them or pay for it
Screw the car is nobody gonna comment on the fact he makes $1700 a month but his rent is $1000
Welcome to broke college life. It's weird that he doesn't have roommates though
Sell it to carmax
Shut up and let the caller talk!
Hand them the keys
If your wife is from out the country,how you gonna show uscis that you can support her when you do adjustment of status for her?..this guy is broke..!
Oh, hell naw. Your parents didn't even gift you a car. Sounds like a the bank gave you the car and they paid payments. It's time to be a grown up and have a car payment? WTF? I'm 45 and haven't had a monthly car payment since I was 28. Been all cash since. Your parents sound like they need to grow up.
They don't like his filipino wife so this a punishment
With crap like that, I'll bet that we're related.
They don't like who he married, just my opinion, it manifests in strange ways don't it
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