I used to feel so guilty about the money I wasted that I couldn’t get rid of anything unless I could sell it to get some money back. Then I started to binge watch you and the minimal mom. I started decluttering and donating things to family friends and charity. Suddenly I realized that being able to give these items to someone else that can truly use them and enjoy them takes away my guilt. It feels so good. My love language has always been giving gifts. This fulfills that need without me having to spend more money during a time that I’m already very financially strapped. So grateful to have made this break through. My house is feeling so much better and is becoming so much easier to manage and maintain! Thank you for the work you put into these videos
I’m getting rolling on this route too, but how do you choose what goes to whom, and how do you package/prepare it, and how do you get it extracted from your own things and then grouped together/prepared to go elsewhere without mixing up stuff or forgetting what’s what?
@@rainbomgI too am joining in this! For me it is simple a box unused gets a label, or a bag gets one and we start. I've been sick but my guys are watching these too and my husband started the nightly 15 with my boys. It has made me feel so much better even seeing little spots appear. I stopped in my tracks to see the laundry room floor in a big spot! It was so lovely, no matter the surrounding chaos. It showed me progress and I wasn't even the one who did it! Baby steps lead to one day running! Whoop🎉
@april ty for saying this! Exactly what I have been dealing with and didn't think of it until reading your comment. Weights being lifted knowing Im not alone and there is hope to be had! Carry on warriors!
My house has so much freaking crap in it. We have kept so much of everything because to me it represented memories and a feeling that someone cared enough about us to give us whatever item or card or anything else we have accumulated. I have been working every single day, going through cupboards and drawers and boxes, so many boxes, to get rid of all of this stuff. It has been emotional, and it has been exhausting, but it finally feels like I'm ready to start letting things go.
Life skills - YES! How to use a city bus, a taxi, an airport, (a crosswalk, an elevator, a parking meter...) so many things we don't know untill we are taught. How to budget, how to buy groceries, how to do tax forms, how to balance a checkbook, and how to organize. Understanding a lease or rental agreement, understanding debt, understanding legal obligations and legal protections. How to keep house and how to declutter.
I was thinking about this and I thought maybe it’s bc all that major life stuff we HAVE to learn, like, YA GONNA LEARN IT, whether you want to or not… or at least you’ll learn what _not_ to do. It’s incentivized, yet there is no incentive to know stuff like: determining the circumference of a circle or finding the capital of Nebraska or understanding that Nathaniel Hawthorne is boring af or remembering that certain people have suffered great injustices from which they have yet to be made whole- these are things maybe we would never experience or learn about just as a feature of functioning in society? So they cram it in there so we don’t feel dumb when we talk to other ppl from other countries who know this stuff? Girl idk but civics being phased out of schools is dangerous. I agree on all points and I genuinely doubt the reason for the lack is so noble, LOL! Also, cooking is so hard!
How to stand to the side of the doors and allow people to get off the elevator!!!!! 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 It's one of those foundational lessons my mom taught me that shocks and angers me to see so many people not understand. 😬 Why should I be having to push my way out of an elevator?! 🤦♀️
I love that you said you won’t shame someone for diabetes as you won’t shame someone who has ADHD. As a therapist, I tell that to my clients all the time. There’s such unnecessary stigma attached to behavioral health. Thank you Cass for your transparency.
Hi Cas. On a separate subject. Midwest Magic Cleaning put out a TH-cam video about 14 hrs ago. In it he mentions that someone told him that you mentioned him in one of your podcasts, and he asked his viewers to let him know which one. I'm not sure that he got a reply. Mack does a great job and he cracks me up. Wondering if maybe you could have him on your podcast?
Cass- we have a pickup service called "Pick Up Please".I don't know if they are nationwide but you book online and tell them where it is (on porch, by door, inside, etc) It has to be stuff 1 person can lift but they are pretty awesome. And they donate to the Vets and give you a receipt.
You really helped me understand the difference between me and my husband's organizational ways along with my mother-in-law. He is such a visual which use to drive me crazy until I found a shelving unit for the counter so that he could see it and how he would spread out all of the mail when I wanted it it a basket stacked. We finally figured it out!
It has really helped me to tell my children that now that we are retired, we don't need to receive christmas gifts. It will just be something they have to deal with when we pass away. All we need is their company. If they insist on a gift, I suggest a grocery store gift card as we are on a fixed income now.
Thank you class for being so real. I have autism and undiagnosed adhd and people like you can raise awareness and make us feel ok not to be normal. I too would loveto be normal and you make me realise that even high achieving neurodivergent people struggle with the feelings. Thank you x
Cas, i have listened to you for about a year now and bottom line: you are wonderful just the way you are! People w memorable personalities are the spice of life -- look at the unique gifts and joy you bring to hoards of 'normal' humans!Thank you 💖💐
I began my decluttering journey in 2012. My sister-in-law passed away and we (hubby and me) were helping her son get the house ready to sell. SIL had bought my in-laws home and cared for her mom as long as she was able do there were basically two families’ worth of clutter in the house. I decided right then that I didn’t want my 3 daughters dealing with all of our stuff! Twelve years later it is still a work in progress! I love what you said about not teaching this in school! It definitely should be taught somewhere somehow!
what you say makes so much sense. Thank you, Cas, for opening my eyes, teaching me how to declutter to keep my house clean, and making this transformation possible. Keep on being you, Boo.
TIP for anyone who has pick up service available for donation centers, check and see if they have text scheduling available, I use it for DAV which is the Dept of Veterans and all goes to support vets and they pick up within days, I schedule a pick up about once a week right now with decluttering. I can not call for stuff on phone, high anxiety, this I can do without speaking to anyone or seeing anyone, just text for pick up, put stuff on curb and its gone! its the best thing EVER
I love everything you said. I used to feel bad about giving away nice things but then I realized I was holding onto something that was no longer of use to me or didn’t fit and I could give it away for someone else to discover and enjoy so now I don’t think twice of taking items I no longer need/use to thrift stores.
This made me cry, Cas. The part that you explain how you felt, before diagnosed, how you were treated and the way you treated yourself hits close to home. I want to tell you I have the same experience. I also have ADHD big-time and I also was very hard on myself for this. I still struggle sometimes but it’s gotten a lot easier having you and Dawn and in my life❤ I had started with Marie Kondo and was already decluttering when you came into my life. I’m a mother of three girls of which two also have ADHD. So it can really get crazy at our house🤪 the steps you explain are very valuable for everybody, but especially for people with the ADHD. Once again thank you! And I love your personality!😊
I totally get your wish to be “normal”. I feel the exact same way. My brother and I both have ADHD and he says that he wouldn’t change it because that is why he is so creative. I would willingly give up my creativity just to be normal and not have so much chaos in my head and my home.
I totally get what you are saying! The struggle is real! But I find when I create ( I have a friend that has a mosaic and crushed glass biz) that I am more relaxed and calmer and can focus and organize and declutter better!
Cass, Thank you so much for explaining ADHD. I’m 73 and have felt like something was wrong with me most of my life because my brain operates differently than neurotypical brains. That altered executive function affects most of the areas of our lives. I listen to Dr. Daniel Amen on TH-cam. He explains the 7 types of ADHD. Life changing. Thank you.
I agree completely!! Let's focus less on standardized tests and teach kids how to critically think (not what to think), how to study, life skills and things that are useful they can use daily after school.
This is why "unschooling" home school is so popular these days. SAHMs (or other key guardians) teach the kids maths, science, literacy, money skills etc. by cooking, writing shopping lists and meal plans with a budget etc... You can also teach them to grow their own fruit and veg if you have access to a garden/allotment and a whole host of other real life skills WHILE hitting the key curriculum points. There are also tonnes of homeschool kids clubs these days where they can spend the day together doing the same activities for socialisation.
I got rid of a box I've been shuffling for 8 years. It seams silly that I did that, and found homes for those items in less than 10 minutes. Why was it a literal stumbling block for so long? I'm so glad it's gone.
@@NancyDrew444there’s also too the rage Decluttering thing, every time I went digging in my kitchen for a pan I’d get so frustrated that I’d grab the box waiting on top of the fridge and start chucking stuff in there that was in my way and had pissd me off
Im so thankful for you! You are so creative! You are so funny! You are so kind and compassionate! You are so knowledgeable! You are intelligent in your organization!
Ouff! Pulled on my heart strings when you wish to be normal. [ my adult son has ADHD and we know that the struggle is real]. Know that You are enough. I wish you feel this! Your channel and advise is so on point. I declutter all of the time and yet, here I am doing it again from your reminders. Thank you!1
Cass, You are SUCH A BLESSING TO ME! After listening to you last night I woke up and cleaned my dresser off! I continued to make progress in the kitchen today… Keep up the motivational podcasts!
It’s so relatable with the chaos in my head also. Have ADHD and had the same comments and issues. Driving away with the wallet on my car. Classic!!! 😂❤
Thank you for being such an awesome human, Cass... you're REAL and perfect the way you are - no need to be normal or wish you were different... I'm sure others would agree with me that we love YOU and have all learned so much from you. Thank You!!!
I have also always felt weird and wrong but once I found other people like me it got better. I think that one of the things that I really love about your content is how relatable it is and it’s so nice to get confirmation that organisation, remembering things and stuff doesn’t come naturally for everyone.
Completely have never understood the common wanting to only give things to people one knows. To mean it seems selfish. To me it is true generosity to give to strangers. Why do people feel okay giving money to charities which benefit strangers but not donating items to benefit strangers? Thank you for pointing out this very common mindset which is a stumbling block for people’s decluttering success.
You might think you are different, and you may be, but to me anyway, you are so neat!! I love your smile, and your insight into what we can do to clean our house. Thank you so much for being YOU, and for helping us. You are the best!!!
Hi CAS , I’ve adopted your night time routine , & loving it 😊, I’m in Queensland Australia 🇦🇺 . I’ve been decluttering my home for 2 weeks now & I’ve finally down to Two rooms Left & Loving the feelings I am feeling . And my local good will are loving me also 😉
Omg. I just turned it on i got my validation right away!! Its universe answering me!. Thank you for that video!! Why i needed that validation, i dont know. I felt overwhelmed with having that nice stuff what i could not utilize anyhow!!! There so much guilt to thow it away!
I'm a 72 year old woman who is a reseller and crafter. I'm also a collector. Ive been working on decluttering for years and have finally gotten to the place where I can actually let some things go. I'm also a visual organizer. Oh my, I have so much stuff! I take several boxes of stuff to goodwill every week but I never really get a handle on my stuff. I've found it difficult the last few years to manage the stuff because I'm not as strong or as steady on my feet as i was even 4 years ago. I want my house back! I don't know why your interview with Matt Paxton came up on my feed but I'm glad it did. That was a fantastic interview! I have subscribed.
You can do it! I’m an artist and I’m also a reseller/product tester, and I am struggliiiinnng. Simply put- we need help. People will come and pick up donations, there are usually online resources about that. Good luck!
I hear you! The problem is getting the heavy stuff out the door when you live alone and no one will help for free and the cost someone to come abd take it is prohibitive! Senior citizen limited income
On The minimalist podcast they say if something feels overwhelming just throw a party. Throw a decluttering party where your friends and family help you declutter. It is fun because items start stories about a trip or a memory..
@marylut6077 exactly! Dumpster divers would love the stuff! You can put a sign on it: for free! And put it on your curb in front of your yard. If no one takes it by trash fay. Then put it out with the garbage.
Normal. What's that?I know I'm not. Celebrate it. You are a wonderful, bright, giving person. We need more people like you. I am home sick with covid. But listening to you, I have cleared 2 kitchen large draws Thank you from the bottom of my heart ❤
When we moved about ten years' ago, I had to declutter/downsize BIG time, as we were moving into a smaller "retirement" home, which had no basement and just plain a lot less space. I remember tossing four (or was it five?) valuable dolls into the trash. (I'm not going to name them because people might say, "You threw away THOSE?") I was absolutely exhausted and overwhelmed, had no help, and just couldn't deal with childhood dolls. I even gave my mother's wedding dress a kiss and threw it into a black garbage bag. Would some vintage shop have taken it? Sure. But I just couldn't do it with everything that was on my plate. Thanks, Cas, for talking about this issue and giving people permission to trash "good" items when they're overwhelmed. Sometimes we just have to do what we have to do...to maintain some semblance of sanity.
Two things - I love getting a bargain at second hand shops, so now when I donate stuff to them, I think about others having that same experience when they find my "good stuff" that I don't use & don't need. 2. Take photos of children's clothing or toys they no longer use, then let the actual item go. The photo will be enough to bring back all the memories that go with it. 😊
@@marylut6077 Hi Mary I understand what you are saying & you are right. It is way more important to live in the present, rather than always looking back. My suggestion was more to help those who have difficulty letting go of those items. If we keep them for our children, the chances are they won't want them, or the item will only get used briefly after years of storage. I kept photo albums for each of my children & every now & then there was some special item that I took a photo of, but most of their albums are of people & occasions. They all have their own children now & this is way better for them to have one or two photo albums rather than boxes full of stuff (like their old baby clothes, first paintings, a wooden coffee table they made in high school, etc.) I don't imagine that my children get their photo albums out to look at very often, but I do think they appreciate having them & that they do show their children occasionally. Thanks for your comment. 💒
Oh, Cas! Normal is boring. All my favorite people something "abnormal" about them including ADHD, autism, depression, bipolar disorder - the list goes on. You are such a beautiful, energetic, passionate person that is so motivating to others, and I hope that you see that in yourself. I'm still working on accepting all of myself as well, but it helps to remember that we all have our individual struggles, even us "normal" people.
I recently subscribed to your channel and have been binging your fabulous content. I love your gentle voice and that you encourage me but don't pressure me. Sometimes I watch you just to feel soothed (sounds needy, I know, but right now I'm in a fragile place). Thanks a bunch.
İ really simplified my house but even i didn’t realize i should do it every week! I was just using 1 in 1 out rule. I am doing 30 days minimalism challenge these days. After that i will do a decluttering day ones a week ty
I truly adore you just as you are and I sure wouldn't like you as much if you were "normal" lol you're my favorite person on ALL social media, most relatable and real! I appreciate your honesty.
I also got prescribed meds for ADHD but the side effects and long term harms of adderall wasn't ok with me. There are so many other options!! I use lemon balm, ashwaghanda, Golden Chlorella, magnesium L-Threonate, L theanine, Gaba, Heavy weight lifting, walks in nature with no tech, stimulus etc etc etc Haven't lost my wallet or phone in years. Haven't locked myself out of the house in a decade. I got my life back with simple supplements and a better workout regimen.
My grandmother I believe was a hoarder her house wasn't filthy but every single space was full with stuff. I grew up a very sloppy kid always had disorganized and stuff all over the place took that into my own home. I had this one room that you'd keep the door shut you could walk in it but I used to call it the avalanche room cuz it looked like stuff just fell all over the place from an avalanche. After years of living like that I've turned into a absolute opposite. I found the key to an organized declutted home helped my brain helps my depression feels so uplifting that I can't stop. I have absolutely no problems decluttering I love it. I have friends who will say to me oh come and help me declutter my house. And I would say okay all we need is trash bags and a dumpster. They would look at me with a horrified look I think it's funny. It definitely is a process and these conversations on your podcast help giving people permission to let it go especially if it's good stuff. And it's a lot of work donating and if you promise it to other people good luck getting them over your house to pick it up. I usually drop everything off at a Goodwill so I don't really feel guilt but if I have to throw it out out it goes for my peace of mind.
Just the way you are is what makes your channel special! You spark outside the box thinking, and thats the reason I keep listening. It's interesting and sparks creative thinking.
I'm raging decluttering right now. I am so miserable and angry with my life. Literally everything you are saying is how I've been living and I can't take it anymore
If you were different from what you are, you May not 41:47 be where you are now Look how many people you have helped with organizing or helping people who had adhd. You may have saved many lives.
Cas, you are a gem and are changing my freaking life! Never been taught yes that thank you. My family is always you need to get rid of 80% of stuff on our terms. And when I said no they did too on helping me. Not meeting me where I am or teaching me. So Ive felt very very alone, broken, stupid. This whole dang vid was like pages from my life. God bless you. And next week talking to my dr about ADHD!
Lovely, lovely Cas, I am normal, and I am a third generation clutter person who until I met you on utube was overwhelmed with stuff. Bless you and your gifts. You have freed so many because of the way you are. I think of you as a little spark plug, and if I want to get moving, all I have to do is tune in to you, and it all starts happening. Your concepts and your energy and your podcasts are helping the world be a better place. Thanks so much. 💖👋🏻💖
This was great, Cas! Thank you so much! The last section was especially meaningful to me. Decluttering on a regular basis is really maintaining equilibrium in our lives. Many, many thanks!
Oh my this episode brought tears to my eyes multiple times. Thank you for being vulnerable and real. I've said my entire life... Why do you laugh so loud, talk loud, struggle with keeping my house clean and decluttered, etc.
Since beginning my decluttering journey I’ve started the “1 new=OUT 2”. I’ve started following Dawn, Dana and you after watching Marie Condo and home edit during Covid. Thank you for your vulnerability I relate to you most…I’m all about tough love
OMG.. You described me to a tee... Always running late, forgetting appointments, losing keys, phone, stuff. My mother used to say I would be late for my own funeral.. Makes me so emotional and guilty. To think my life could have been so different if diagnosed earlier. If I had my son evaluated, maybe he would still be alive. Also about my house and how over stuffed it is. How it hasnt been really clean in years. Maybe 1 room but it never lasts long. Since I found your page I have really been trying to get stuff out. Clean the kitchen at night throw out old food. Go through clothes and donate what is not worn. My problem is getting my husband and daughter on board and to participate. Its all well and good if I am going through my stuff and house stuff but I can't do their stuff too... i feel like I will never be done. Help..
Aww, my son used to say "it's too spicy" to toothpaste 😂🥰 Love your content, Cass. I was born decluttering, organizing, and cleaning.🎉 😂 You're a gem girl! Never change how you are. I'm sorry that inside, you've felt like you wish you were different....but it's how God built you. And I see you as a complete light to an online community, offering wonderful wisdom and great tips to improve daily life!
Cas, I'm listening to this right now and I am almost in tears. You mentioned the stress and panic of constantly misplacing things. I KNOW that feeling, and the shame. It wasn't until I discovered you 3 years ago and started working with my brain to discover how to create the right homes for things that I keep according to how my brain works, that I got that tendency under control. I still will occasionally forget where I set something 5 minutes ago. But the hunt for it is not nearly as stressful, because it's easier to trace back my steps to find it. And I am now developing the habit of speaking words of grace to myself while I am looking for it, to replace all the negative insults to myself. Organising according to my brain and personality, and speaking kindness to myself keep the panic and shame down, which helps my brain get back to focusing again. You have a way of speaking the truth with love and kindness and patience towards others, and it rubs off. I hope you are as kind to yourself as you are to others when you have those crazy moments of panic trying yo find things. I know, when you have a condition like ADHD or any other that affects executive functioning, that the more stressed we are, the more negatively we speak to ourselves when we're under stress, the more scateered-brained we get. And the clumsier we can get as well. I no longer allow myself to entertain the negative thoughts that flow in and out of my brain, even if some of the thoughts have some truth in them. Those are areas that i'm working on getting better with, while working with how my brain works. None of us is perfect, including "normal" people. And that's OK.
Thank you so much for this!! The adhd is so relatable and it makes me think a lot about how we treat others who are different and brains work differently. I love that you said you forgave yourself, thank you for being vulnerable and sharing this with us.
Just found your channel. We just moved into my father in law’s house who recently passed away. We are enjoying all the memories but we also are trying to organize the house to our liking. I’ve only listen to this one episode, but I already know I’ll be using many of your ideas. Looking forward to listening/watching you.
Cas - you are the best!! I LOVE hearing your voice and you are a very gifted speaker (and more)!!!! Cherish yourself!!! What you perceive as “normal” in others is merely that you don’t perceive their quirks and oddities. We all have them! Love you!!!! Dianna from So California.
While I agree EVERYONE has quirks, I'll still account for the fact that us Neuro-Diverse people (with various comorbid conditions) struggle more. I like the car analogy for this point: imagine you drive an old car that's falling apart and you have to Macguyver it back together to be able to drive to work. You always get told off for being late by all the BMW / Tesla etc. drivers, who can literally get in and go to work easy as pie. This is how we experience every day life, always at a disadvantage; judged by others for being scruffy, or late, or forgetting things because we have _that much more_ we have to deal with for every single task that requires executive functioning... Heck, some of us even struggle to brush our teeth every day. The struggle is real, and you are truly blessed if you don't know it. I also point people to Spoon Theory by Christine Miserandino - she wrote it to explain having Lupus, and it works for any chronic physical condition and things like depression and anxiety too.
I’m a “save it for someone who needs it” declutterer so I have changed my focus when getting rid of stuff. I have found a small Christian thrift store who gives a percentage of the sales of my items to programs at my church! I donate in their name & a check comes to the church monthly. Now I see stuff in my house as having a purpose if I get rid of it. Oh, and the thrift store unloads it for me. Win-win! Thank you for all you do for us savers of everything
Seeing you on your tv show while I was home during the pandemic changed my life in an amazing way!! I started watching you in your tube and then continued to Dana, who I love just as much!!!❤❤❤
2 minutes 40 seconds in and I'm bawling because I'm so overwhelmed! The pressure to donate-sell-whatever makes my brain freeze completely because now I have to do it "right"... and the items I have managed to declutter go back in the closet again, because I can't just bin them _I have to-_ and that isn't gonna happen.
Hi! If I may reply to your comment... I started by things that I definitely felt went in the trash (lids, knick knacks, fridge magnets, etc.). Then, I went through decor I didn't buy or like (wedding/birthday gifts ...). I decluttered kitchen duplicates and things I hadn't used. Clothes that didn't fit or I didn't like. Clothes I had worn a lot (to use the other clothes) and I downsized the clothes that are not for my city's weather (hot weather so' jackets, sweaters, etc.). I went little by little with every "category" in my house. I started two years ago and, so far, I don't regret or miss anything. Most times I listen to a decluttering video so I feel I'm "body-doubling".
Totally agree with you about Life Skills 101...it should be a class! Also thanks for the suggestions for people who have small homes with little storage space. Another great video!
Funny decluttering story. Almost asked someone for an empty box for donations. But I was decluttering a gift from them. Oops. I totally have the decluttering concept down, but enjoy listening to you for motivation. And, as someone from the US, I love to hear you say the Canadian "about". Makes me giggle. Please show yourself more love. Who's to say what "normal" is. We all ❤️ you just the way you are!
Omg I almost cried when you said you wouldn’t shame diabetec for needing insulin so why would you shame yourself because your brain doesn’t work. I have recently been wondering if I had adhd and I finally went to a psychiatrist who almost instantly said she was almost 100% certain I had adhd and I didn’t even go to her to ask that it was something completely different. I’ve been to a few psychiatrist in my 50yrs of living and this is the first time I think they got it right. The more I here people with adhd talk about how their life is the more I’m convinced that’s me! It’s like someone has been watching me and is telling my story (like that one song says lol)
I hope you are getting help, whether it is meds, or tips for living life w ADHD! I highly recommend Hello Brains- Jessica McCabe! She has a You tube channel and a book called How to ADHD! She is funny, relatable , compassionate and has a lot of helpful tips!
Hi Cas I can really relate to your ADHD journey! I was always labelled as "practical not academic" I finally tried to get my degree aged 40 years, and was very lucky to be able to do this. I was struggling to keep up with the essays and I talked to some of my classmates who suggested I get checked for dyslexia ... and guess what I finally got the dyslexia diagnosis! I got some assistance from the uni and got my degree! But I have always struggled to get and especially keep organised having recently found you and seeing your channel has really helped and inspired me🤯 I have found out that I am a ladybug and my hubby is a butterfly this is sooooo game changing!!! We are starting to get there although it's taking a while but I have made a plan that is I will do one thing everyday .... I dont beat myself up anymore if I dont do a whole room, some days I just put the dishes away or tidy my shoes away, but often I do a little more, the point is I wont beat myself up / convince myself I'm a failure if I don't do the whole house! Thank you so much for everything you do! 🤩🤗
Decluttering with my husband is HARD! He is a collector of any type of sports memorabilia and keeps so much from his past. I need to get his TWO rooms actually put together and off the floor so we can get rid of the non essentials... wish me luck 😅
You are wonderful and I enjoy listening to you! You have helped me so much and you were meant to be who you are cause we need your sunshine and bluntness ❤❤❤❤
Thank you Cass for getting on the soap box others, like myself, don't have the guts for, don't take the time for, don't feel legitimate for, or are not even conscious we need! From one late diagnosed ADHDer who's stopped stuff getting in, overcome her emotional link with most clutter and still needs to work on her wish to sell items which are still sought after online cos I don't have the bandwidth to sell them.
After my husband passed and I was going thru stuff - mostly mine - that I just didn't want to give to goodwill or salvation army - my cousin had a place near her that took anything to give to ppl in their town that were needy and it took nothing for me to say - let's go - that was my main hold up - now that most of my house is declutter of visual clutter that place is no longer open so I just want to get rid of stuff so taking it to good will - same cousin is going to get house and everything when I pass and she was saying "thank you, ty, ty!!!!"
I have all this time not realized I was a bee.... but when you laid it out about how my stuff being out doesn't bother me that it is just the amount of stuff... life shift. Also, calling in reinforcements to get over my shame/inability to start. Thank you for what you bring and your vulnerability.
I spent years feeling like a lazy slob. I got tired just thinking about doing things like dishes, laundry anything household things. My bedroom was a mess because that’s where I hide things then it was then horrible to clean. I just hated why I couldn’t change. I would leave my purse, lose keys. I desk at work was always a mess and I felt dumb all the time. I was 56 when I had a total melt down. I went on Vyavase and it worked but then they put me on a generic and it make me feel awful so know I am not on anything and I feel so cluttered.
I love that about having an elective school course about decluttering. I always thought it was a great idea for homeschooling, add it to their curriculum!
I had 3 huge decluttering sessions, w/ the 3rd being the selling of my home. My family & I took carload after carload to donations, plus invited friends & family at get-togethers to go thru things. But I also stacked furniture, garden tools & decor, etc at the street. Most everything would be gone w/in hrs. Even invited some at the curb inside for more items. (Hopefully they weren't hoarders, but I did remove alot of stuff) And my home didn't even seem overly crowded as I was highly organized, but it was a 4 bedrm w/basement & sm attic. .. I downsized by picking my favorites, then picking my favorites again & again, until i was where i neeeded to be. .. It is helpful to continuously ask yourself 'what is relevant' at the stage you find yourself in.😊
Please, please, please don't wish to be any different than you are! I know you have difficulties that many people can't begin to understand, and that's hard. I have an adult sister who struggles with many of the things you mentioned and it can bring her down so badly but she is the highlight of my kids lives and I am so fortunate to have her in mine. I am sure there are many people who feel the same way about you. You are an inspiration to me and I thank you for speaking out and being so open about ADHD and all it's hurdles. And also for the great tips, tricks and encouragement with decluttering and organisation. Sending you lots of love and hugs❤❤
Please don't throw things away that are GOOD!! We have a relationship with a local 2nd hand shop that will let me simply drop a bag off and leave. The first couple items were brand new shoes that had never been worn and i talked to the shop owner asking if i could bring them things that were too good to chuck in a bin at Goodwill. Once i established trust that my items would be EASILY resealable, i no longer have to make it a whole big deal. Easy and it is so nice knowing someone else will get to enjoy items that just never fit in my family's life. Half the Christmas presents we get go to her shop, still in the box 😂
I love your honesty about your feelings. I've made a lot of mistakes in my 60+ years judging or as you said perceiving others as well as being equally critical of myself. My Mom had a saying that everyone has a skeleton; you just don't know what is in other people's closets. This was her answer when I asked questions like "Why isn't our family..." I love you just the way you are and how you are relatable to so many people wanting to be heard. Thanks for all you do and share.
The talk of not wanting to give stuff to strangers, only to people you know really resonates with me. I work for the police and I worry about criminals coming into my house & casing it. Its a real thing. It happens all the time. But it paralyzes me. I presently have 2 tv stands in my living room because I can't get rid of the old one. I also have 2 washers & dryers in my basement. Same reason.
There are community resources and various groups that help with things like that, as far as helping people in need source the things they need. For example, an animal shelter probably needs a washer and dryer, or plenty of other places. Maybe you could contact another civil servant or entity like a social worker or the local domestic violence shelters or heck even schools have drives for stuff like that and see what they’ve got going on. Many organizations will come pick stuff up or at least help you find a way to get it there.
If you were normal, you would not have created this wonderful channel to help us. Thank you for being here!
I used to feel so guilty about the money I wasted that I couldn’t get rid of anything unless I could sell it to get some money back. Then I started to binge watch you and the minimal mom. I started decluttering and donating things to family friends and charity. Suddenly I realized that being able to give these items to someone else that can truly use them and enjoy them takes away my guilt. It feels so good. My love language has always been giving gifts. This fulfills that need without me having to spend more money during a time that I’m already very financially strapped. So grateful to have made this break through. My house is feeling so much better and is becoming so much easier to manage and maintain! Thank you for the work you put into these videos
I’m getting rolling on this route too, but how do you choose what goes to whom, and how do you package/prepare it, and how do you get it extracted from your own things and then grouped together/prepared to go elsewhere without mixing up stuff or forgetting what’s what?
@@rainbomgI too am joining in this! For me it is simple a box unused gets a label, or a bag gets one and we start. I've been sick but my guys are watching these too and my husband started the nightly 15 with my boys. It has made me feel so much better even seeing little spots appear. I stopped in my tracks to see the laundry room floor in a big spot! It was so lovely, no matter the surrounding chaos. It showed me progress and I wasn't even the one who did it! Baby steps lead to one day running! Whoop🎉
@april ty for saying this! Exactly what I have been dealing with and didn't think of it until reading your comment. Weights being lifted knowing Im not alone and there is hope to be had! Carry on warriors!
Love your openness and honesty.❤
Your message was beautiful i am the same way
My house has so much freaking crap in it. We have kept so much of everything because to me it represented memories and a feeling that someone cared enough about us to give us whatever item or card or anything else we have accumulated. I have been working every single day, going through cupboards and drawers and boxes, so many boxes, to get rid of all of this stuff. It has been emotional, and it has been exhausting, but it finally feels like I'm ready to start letting things go.
Well done Twojros! G Ire 😊
I don't want the people I love to be burdened by anything I give them. ❤
Life skills - YES! How to use a city bus, a taxi, an airport, (a crosswalk, an elevator, a parking meter...) so many things we don't know untill we are taught. How to budget, how to buy groceries, how to do tax forms, how to balance a checkbook, and how to organize. Understanding a lease or rental agreement, understanding debt, understanding legal obligations and legal protections. How to keep house and how to declutter.
I was thinking about this and I thought maybe it’s bc all that major life stuff we HAVE to learn, like, YA GONNA LEARN IT, whether you want to or not… or at least you’ll learn what _not_ to do. It’s incentivized, yet there is no incentive to know stuff like: determining the circumference of a circle or finding the capital of Nebraska or understanding that Nathaniel Hawthorne is boring af or remembering that certain people have suffered great injustices from which they have yet to be made whole- these are things maybe we would never experience or learn about just as a feature of functioning in society? So they cram it in there so we don’t feel dumb when we talk to other ppl from other countries who know this stuff? Girl idk but civics being phased out of schools is dangerous. I agree on all points and I genuinely doubt the reason for the lack is so noble, LOL! Also, cooking is so hard!
They don't teach life skills in public school because that would interfere with the industrial machine that wants to sell us stuff we don't need.
How to stand to the side of the doors and allow people to get off the elevator!!!!! 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 It's one of those foundational lessons my mom taught me that shocks and angers me to see so many people not understand. 😬 Why should I be having to push my way out of an elevator?! 🤦♀️
I love that you said you won’t shame someone for diabetes as you won’t shame someone who has ADHD. As a therapist, I tell that to my clients all the time. There’s such unnecessary stigma attached to behavioral health. Thank you Cass for your transparency.
my a-ha moment was when I realized that it is better for me to put it in the landfill than keep it in MY landfill............ my home.
Hi Cas. On a separate subject. Midwest Magic Cleaning put out a TH-cam video about 14 hrs ago. In it he mentions that someone told him that you mentioned him in one of your podcasts, and he asked his viewers to let him know which one. I'm not sure that he got a reply. Mack does a great job and he cracks me up. Wondering if maybe you could have him on your podcast?
Cas, you should be proud of yourself for the beautiful person you are❤ you bring joy and relief to so many people!
🤗🍀✨️
Absolutely. Thanks so much for helping me and so many others through your life experiences! ❤
Cass- we have a pickup service called "Pick Up Please".I don't know if they are nationwide but you book online and tell them where it is (on porch, by door, inside, etc) It has to be stuff 1 person can lift but they are pretty awesome. And they donate to the Vets and give you a receipt.
The “nice” stuff would disappear if you left it outside here in Brooklyn. One great thing about living in a city.
Same here! 🙌🏻
You really helped me understand the difference between me and my husband's organizational ways along with my mother-in-law. He is such a visual which use to drive me crazy until I found a shelving unit for the counter so that he could see it and how he would spread out all of the mail when I wanted it it a basket stacked. We finally figured it out!
It has really helped me to tell my children that now that we are retired, we don't need to receive christmas gifts. It will just be something they have to deal with when we pass away. All we need is their company. If they insist on a gift, I suggest a grocery store gift card as we are on a fixed income now.
Great idea! I agree! My daughter sometimes gifts me experiences- an art class of some sort, etc!
You look so very pretty today! The color suits you. Thanks so much for your great advice.
Yes indeed, Cas looks lovely in these deep jewel colours 💙
Agreed ❤
Thank you class for being so real. I have autism and undiagnosed adhd and people like you can raise awareness and make us feel ok not to be normal. I too would loveto be normal and you make me realise that even high achieving neurodivergent people struggle with the feelings. Thank you x
Cass, you have such a calming voice and a gentle approach for helping others.
No blame ~ No shame. Thank you. ❤
Cas, i have listened to you for about a year now and bottom line: you are wonderful just the way you are! People w memorable personalities are the spice of life -- look at the unique gifts and joy you bring to hoards of 'normal' humans!Thank you 💖💐
I began my decluttering journey in 2012. My sister-in-law passed away and we (hubby and me) were helping her son get the house ready to sell. SIL had bought my in-laws home and cared for her mom as long as she was able do there were basically two families’ worth of clutter in the house. I decided right then that I didn’t want my 3 daughters dealing with all of our stuff! Twelve years later it is still a work in progress! I love what you said about not teaching this in school! It definitely should be taught somewhere somehow!
what you say makes so much sense. Thank you, Cas, for opening my eyes, teaching me how to declutter to keep my house clean, and making this transformation possible. Keep on being you, Boo.
Cas you are WONDERFUL. I thoroughly enjoy your content and your sense of humor.
TIP for anyone who has pick up service available for donation centers, check and see if they have text scheduling available, I use it for DAV which is the Dept of Veterans and all goes to support vets and they pick up within days, I schedule a pick up about once a week right now with decluttering. I can not call for stuff on phone, high anxiety, this I can do without speaking to anyone or seeing anyone, just text for pick up, put stuff on curb and its gone! its the best thing EVER
I agree, decluttering/organization... should be part of the "Life Skills" classes, at school.
Cas, we are all so glad you are not “normal “! Your unique self has helped so many people!
I love everything you said. I used to feel bad about giving away nice things but then I realized I was holding onto something that was no longer of use to me or didn’t fit and I could give it away for someone else to discover and enjoy so now I don’t think twice of taking items I no longer need/use to thrift stores.
This made me cry, Cas. The part that you explain how you felt, before diagnosed, how you were treated and the way you treated yourself hits close to home. I want to tell you I have the same experience. I also have ADHD big-time and I also was very hard on myself for this. I still struggle sometimes but it’s gotten a lot easier having you and Dawn and in my life❤ I had started with Marie Kondo and was already decluttering when you came into my life. I’m a mother of three girls of which two also have ADHD. So it can really get crazy at our house🤪 the steps you explain are very valuable for everybody, but especially for people with the ADHD. Once again thank you! And I love your personality!😊
I totally get your wish to be “normal”. I feel the exact same way. My brother and I both have ADHD and he says that he wouldn’t change it because that is why he is so creative. I would willingly give up my creativity just to be normal and not have so much chaos in my head and my home.
I totally get what you are saying! The struggle is real! But I find when I create ( I have a friend that has a mosaic and crushed glass biz) that I am more relaxed and calmer and can focus and organize and declutter better!
Cass, Thank you so much for explaining ADHD. I’m 73 and have felt like something was wrong with me most of my life because my brain operates differently than neurotypical brains. That altered executive function affects most of the areas of our lives. I listen to Dr. Daniel Amen on TH-cam. He explains the 7 types of ADHD. Life changing. Thank you.
I agree completely!! Let's focus less on standardized tests and teach kids how to critically think (not what to think), how to study, life skills and things that are useful they can use daily after school.
No I think we need both. There are just some things that the kids need to know and know well.
This is why "unschooling" home school is so popular these days. SAHMs (or other key guardians) teach the kids maths, science, literacy, money skills etc. by cooking, writing shopping lists and meal plans with a budget etc... You can also teach them to grow their own fruit and veg if you have access to a garden/allotment and a whole host of other real life skills WHILE hitting the key curriculum points. There are also tonnes of homeschool kids clubs these days where they can spend the day together doing the same activities for socialisation.
I agree I love the bug-specific videos. I would also love to see a Playlist for each bug ❤😊
Me too
Yes💕🇮🇪
I got rid of a box I've been shuffling for 8 years. It seams silly that I did that, and found homes for those items in less than 10 minutes. Why was it a literal stumbling block for so long? I'm so glad it's gone.
I've been shuffling for a cpl of yrs. Gonna work on the smallest box now. Ty for the inspiration!
@@NancyDrew444there’s also too the rage Decluttering thing, every time I went digging in my kitchen for a pan I’d get so frustrated that I’d grab the box waiting on top of the fridge and start chucking stuff in there that was in my way and had pissd me off
Im so thankful for you! You are so creative! You are so funny! You are so kind and compassionate! You are so knowledgeable! You are intelligent in your organization!
Ouff! Pulled on my heart strings when you wish to be normal. [ my adult son has ADHD and we know that the struggle is real]. Know that You are enough. I wish you feel this! Your channel and advise is so on point. I declutter all of the time and yet, here I am doing it again from your reminders. Thank you!1
Cass, You are SUCH A BLESSING TO ME! After listening to you last night I woke up and cleaned my dresser off! I continued to make progress in the kitchen today… Keep up the motivational podcasts!
It’s so relatable with the chaos in my head also.
Have ADHD and had the same comments and issues.
Driving away with the wallet on my car. Classic!!!
😂❤
Thank you for being such an awesome human, Cass... you're REAL and perfect the way you are - no need to be normal or wish you were different... I'm sure others would agree with me that we love YOU and have all learned so much from you. Thank You!!!
I am the same way. I really did not realize there are others like me.
I have also always felt weird and wrong but once I found other people like me it got better. I think that one of the things that I really love about your content is how relatable it is and it’s so nice to get confirmation that organisation, remembering things and stuff doesn’t come naturally for everyone.
Completely have never understood the common wanting to only give things to people one knows. To mean it seems selfish. To me it is true generosity to give to strangers. Why do people feel okay giving money to charities which benefit strangers but not donating items to benefit strangers? Thank you for pointing out this very common mindset which is a stumbling block for people’s decluttering success.
You might think you are different, and you may be, but to me anyway, you are so neat!! I love your smile, and your insight into what we can do to clean our house. Thank you so much for being YOU, and for helping us. You are the best!!!
Hi CAS , I’ve adopted your night time routine , & loving it 😊, I’m in Queensland Australia 🇦🇺 . I’ve been decluttering my home for 2 weeks now & I’ve finally down to Two rooms Left & Loving the feelings I am feeling . And my local good will are loving me also 😉
Omg. I just turned it on i got my validation right away!! Its universe answering me!. Thank you for that video!!
Why i needed that validation, i dont know. I felt overwhelmed with having that nice stuff what i could not utilize anyhow!!! There so much guilt to thow it away!
I'm a 72 year old woman who is a reseller and crafter. I'm also a collector. Ive been working on decluttering for years and have finally gotten to the place where I can actually let some things go. I'm also a visual organizer. Oh my, I have so much stuff! I take several boxes of stuff to goodwill every week but I never really get a handle on my stuff. I've found it difficult the last few years to manage the stuff because I'm not as strong or as steady on my feet as i was even 4 years ago. I want my house back! I don't know why your interview with Matt Paxton came up on my feed but I'm glad it did. That was a fantastic interview! I have subscribed.
You can do it! I’m an artist and I’m also a reseller/product tester, and I am struggliiiinnng. Simply put- we need help. People will come and pick up donations, there are usually online resources about that. Good luck!
I hear you! The problem is getting the heavy stuff out the door when you live alone and no one will help for free and the cost someone to come abd take it is prohibitive! Senior citizen limited income
On The minimalist podcast they say if something feels overwhelming just throw a party. Throw a decluttering party where your friends and family help you declutter. It is fun because items start stories about a trip or a memory..
Thank you so much for this! It's ok to throw good things in the trash? Finally, permission! Really needed that! Love your podcasts ❤
I caught that too. Been feeling horrible for doing that when I have no way to give something away. But sometimes you just have to.
If no one wants the nice stuff, then it is trash. Trash category isn’t confined to broken or ripped stuff.
@marylut6077 exactly! Dumpster divers would love the stuff! You can put a sign on it: for free! And put it on your curb in front of your yard. If no one takes it by trash fay. Then put it out with the garbage.
Normal. What's that?I know I'm not. Celebrate it. You are a wonderful, bright, giving person. We need more people like you. I am home sick with covid. But listening to you, I have cleared 2 kitchen large draws
Thank you from the bottom of my heart ❤
When we moved about ten years' ago, I had to declutter/downsize BIG time, as we were moving into a smaller "retirement" home, which had no basement and just plain a lot less space. I remember tossing four (or was it five?) valuable dolls into the trash. (I'm not going to name them because people might say, "You threw away THOSE?") I was absolutely exhausted and overwhelmed, had no help, and just couldn't deal with childhood dolls. I even gave my mother's wedding dress a kiss and threw it into a black garbage bag. Would some vintage shop have taken it? Sure. But I just couldn't do it with everything that was on my plate. Thanks, Cas, for talking about this issue and giving people permission to trash "good" items when they're overwhelmed. Sometimes we just have to do what we have to do...to maintain some semblance of sanity.
Forgive yourself. You did the right thing. It’s a form of self care for your sanity.
If they're cabbage patch, they're probably not worth what you imagine.
@@toomanymarys7355 Not Cabbage Patch.
Two things - I love getting a bargain at second hand shops, so now when I donate stuff to them, I think about others having that same experience when they find my "good stuff" that I don't use & don't need.
2. Take photos of children's clothing or toys they no longer use, then let the actual item go. The photo will be enough to bring back all the memories that go with it. 😊
Don’t you feel hoarding photo memories of kid clothes and toys keep you from enjoying what they are doing now? What your life is now?
@@marylut6077 Hi Mary
I understand what you are saying & you are right. It is way more important to live in the present, rather than always looking back.
My suggestion was more to help those who have difficulty letting go of those items. If we keep them for our children, the chances are they won't want them, or the item will only get used briefly after years of storage.
I kept photo albums for each of my children & every now & then there was some special item that I took a photo of, but most of their albums are of people & occasions. They all have their own children now & this is way better for them to have one or two photo albums
rather than boxes full of stuff (like their old baby clothes, first paintings, a wooden coffee table they made in high school, etc.)
I don't imagine that my children get their photo albums out to look at very often, but I do think they appreciate having them & that they do show their children occasionally.
Thanks for your comment. 💒
Oh, Cas! Normal is boring. All my favorite people something "abnormal" about them including ADHD, autism, depression, bipolar disorder - the list goes on. You are such a beautiful, energetic, passionate person that is so motivating to others, and I hope that you see that in yourself. I'm still working on accepting all of myself as well, but it helps to remember that we all have our individual struggles, even us "normal" people.
Life Skills 101 - absolutely!! 💯 👏🏼
I recently subscribed to your channel and have been binging your fabulous content. I love your gentle voice and that you encourage me but don't pressure me. Sometimes I watch you just to feel soothed (sounds needy, I know, but right now I'm in a fragile place). Thanks a bunch.
I often put things on my towns free stuff page on Facebook. It really blesses other people when we share things with them ❤!
I just learned I'm a bee, can't let it go. Always thought I was a butterfly. Love the podcast!
İ really simplified my house but even i didn’t realize i should do it every week! I was just using 1 in 1 out rule. I am doing 30 days minimalism challenge these days. After that i will do a decluttering day ones a week ty
I truly adore you just as you are and I sure wouldn't like you as much if you were "normal" lol you're my favorite person on ALL social media, most relatable and real! I appreciate your honesty.
I just love you. So much wisdom. Thanks for sharing it with us!
I also got prescribed meds for ADHD but the side effects and long term harms of adderall wasn't ok with me.
There are so many other options!! I use lemon balm, ashwaghanda, Golden Chlorella, magnesium L-Threonate, L theanine, Gaba, Heavy weight lifting, walks in nature with no tech, stimulus etc etc etc
Haven't lost my wallet or phone in years. Haven't locked myself out of the house in a decade. I got my life back with simple supplements and a better workout regimen.
I love that you’ve found natural solutions. Celery juice is amazing as well ❤
My grandmother I believe was a hoarder her house wasn't filthy but every single space was full with stuff. I grew up a very sloppy kid always had disorganized and stuff all over the place took that into my own home. I had this one room that you'd keep the door shut you could walk in it but I used to call it the avalanche room cuz it looked like stuff just fell all over the place from an avalanche. After years of living like that I've turned into a absolute opposite. I found the key to an organized declutted home helped my brain helps my depression feels so uplifting that I can't stop. I have absolutely no problems decluttering I love it. I have friends who will say to me oh come and help me declutter my house. And I would say okay all we need is trash bags and a dumpster. They would look at me with a horrified look I think it's funny. It definitely is a process and these conversations on your podcast help giving people permission to let it go especially if it's good stuff. And it's a lot of work donating and if you promise it to other people good luck getting them over your house to pick it up. I usually drop everything off at a Goodwill so I don't really feel guilt but if I have to throw it out out it goes for my peace of mind.
Just the way you are is what makes your channel special! You spark outside the box thinking, and thats the reason I keep listening. It's interesting and sparks creative thinking.
I'm raging decluttering right now. I am so miserable and angry with my life. Literally everything you are saying is how I've been living and I can't take it anymore
If you were different from what you are, you May not 41:47 be where you are now Look how many people you have helped with organizing or helping people who had adhd. You may have saved many lives.
Cas, you are a gem and are changing my freaking life! Never been taught yes that thank you. My family is always you need to get rid of 80% of stuff on our terms. And when I said no they did too on helping me. Not meeting me where I am or teaching me. So Ive felt very very alone, broken, stupid. This whole dang vid was like pages from my life. God bless you. And next week talking to my dr about ADHD!
Lovely, lovely Cas,
I am normal, and I am a third generation clutter person who until I met you on utube was overwhelmed with stuff. Bless you and your gifts. You have freed so many because of the way you are. I think of you as a little spark plug, and if I want to get moving, all I have to do is tune in to you, and it all starts happening.
Your concepts and your energy and your podcasts are helping the world be a better place. Thanks so much. 💖👋🏻💖
This was great, Cas! Thank you so much! The last section was especially meaningful to me. Decluttering on a regular basis is really maintaining equilibrium in our lives. Many, many thanks!
Oh my this episode brought tears to my eyes multiple times. Thank you for being vulnerable and real. I've said my entire life... Why do you laugh so loud, talk loud, struggle with keeping my house clean and decluttered, etc.
Since beginning my decluttering journey I’ve started the “1 new=OUT 2”. I’ve started following Dawn, Dana and you after watching Marie Condo and home edit during Covid. Thank you for your vulnerability I relate to you most…I’m all about tough love
Love the rage it motivates me
OMG.. You described me to a tee... Always running late, forgetting appointments, losing keys, phone, stuff. My mother used to say I would be late for my own funeral.. Makes me so emotional and guilty. To think my life could have been so different if diagnosed earlier. If I had my son evaluated, maybe he would still be alive. Also about my house and how over stuffed it is. How it hasnt been really clean in years. Maybe 1 room but it never lasts long. Since I found your page I have really been trying to get stuff out. Clean the kitchen at night throw out old food. Go through clothes and donate what is not worn. My problem is getting my husband and daughter on board and to participate. Its all well and good if I am going through my stuff and house stuff but I can't do their stuff too... i feel like I will never be done. Help..
Go create that high school class, Cas. It could be an after school club. Kids would love you!
Aww, my son used to say "it's too spicy" to
toothpaste 😂🥰
Love your content, Cass. I was born decluttering, organizing, and cleaning.🎉 😂
You're a gem girl! Never change how you are. I'm sorry that inside, you've felt like you wish you were different....but it's how God built you. And I see you as a complete light to an online community, offering wonderful wisdom and great tips to improve daily life!
“You can do hard things.” 👏👏👏
Great session. Thank you for your candor. You’re super interesting and are NOT annoying. ❤
Excellent! I just learned a boat load of good stuff!
Cas, I'm listening to this right now and I am almost in tears. You mentioned the stress and panic of constantly misplacing things. I KNOW that feeling, and the shame. It wasn't until I discovered you 3 years ago and started working with my brain to discover how to create the right homes for things that I keep according to how my brain works, that I got that tendency under control. I still will occasionally forget where I set something 5 minutes ago. But the hunt for it is not nearly as stressful, because it's easier to trace back my steps to find it. And I am now developing the habit of speaking words of grace to myself while I am looking for it, to replace all the negative insults to myself. Organising according to my brain and personality, and speaking kindness to myself keep the panic and shame down, which helps my brain get back to focusing again. You have a way of speaking the truth with love and kindness and patience towards others, and it rubs off. I hope you are as kind to yourself as you are to others when you have those crazy moments of panic trying yo find things. I know, when you have a condition like ADHD or any other that affects executive functioning, that the more stressed we are, the more negatively we speak to ourselves when we're under stress, the more scateered-brained we get. And the clumsier we can get as well. I no longer allow myself to entertain the negative thoughts that flow in and out of my brain, even if some of the thoughts have some truth in them. Those are areas that i'm working on getting better with, while working with how my brain works. None of us is perfect, including "normal" people. And that's OK.
Thank you so much for this!! The adhd is so relatable and it makes me think a lot about how we treat others who are different and brains work differently. I love that you said you forgave yourself, thank you for being vulnerable and sharing this with us.
Absolutely love this! All of it! You have really helped me to help myself & my family, love your vids!
Just found your channel. We just moved into my father in law’s house who recently passed away. We are enjoying all the memories but we also are trying to organize the house to our liking. I’ve only listen to this one episode, but I already know I’ll be using many of your ideas. Looking forward to listening/watching you.
Cas - you are the best!! I LOVE hearing your voice and you are a very gifted speaker (and more)!!!! Cherish yourself!!! What you perceive as “normal” in others is merely that you don’t perceive their quirks and oddities. We all have them! Love you!!!! Dianna from So California.
While I agree EVERYONE has quirks, I'll still account for the fact that us Neuro-Diverse people (with various comorbid conditions) struggle more.
I like the car analogy for this point: imagine you drive an old car that's falling apart and you have to Macguyver it back together to be able to drive to work. You always get told off for being late by all the BMW / Tesla etc. drivers, who can literally get in and go to work easy as pie. This is how we experience every day life, always at a disadvantage; judged by others for being scruffy, or late, or forgetting things because we have _that much more_ we have to deal with for every single task that requires executive functioning... Heck, some of us even struggle to brush our teeth every day. The struggle is real, and you are truly blessed if you don't know it. I also point people to Spoon Theory by Christine Miserandino - she wrote it to explain having Lupus, and it works for any chronic physical condition and things like depression and anxiety too.
I’m a “save it for someone who needs it” declutterer so I have changed my focus when getting rid of stuff. I have found a small Christian thrift store who gives a percentage of the sales of my items to programs at my church! I donate in their name & a check comes to the church monthly. Now I see stuff in my house as having a purpose if I get rid of it. Oh, and the thrift store unloads it for me. Win-win! Thank you for all you do for us savers of everything
Seeing you on your tv show while I was home during the pandemic changed my life in an amazing way!! I started watching you in your tube and then continued to Dana, who I love just as much!!!❤❤❤
Wow, I’d forgotten that I used to loose things all the time. I used to think I was just a scatterbrain, but there was too much stuff to remember!
Cas, you are wonderfully made to be uniquely you.
You might not feel "normal" but I just love what you are doing to help me declutter.
2 minutes 40 seconds in and I'm bawling because I'm so overwhelmed!
The pressure to donate-sell-whatever makes my brain freeze completely because now I have to do it "right"... and the items I have managed to declutter go back in the closet again, because I can't just bin them _I have to-_ and that isn't gonna happen.
Hi! If I may reply to your comment... I started by things that I definitely felt went in the trash (lids, knick knacks, fridge magnets, etc.). Then, I went through decor I didn't buy or like (wedding/birthday gifts ...). I decluttered kitchen duplicates and things I hadn't used. Clothes that didn't fit or I didn't like. Clothes I had worn a lot (to use the other clothes) and I downsized the clothes that are not for my city's weather (hot weather so' jackets, sweaters, etc.). I went little by little with every "category" in my house. I started two years ago and, so far, I don't regret or miss anything. Most times I listen to a decluttering video so I feel I'm "body-doubling".
Totally agree with you about Life Skills 101...it should be a class! Also thanks for the suggestions for people who have small homes with little storage space. Another great video!
Watching your videos have motivated and got me started on my homes.
Funny decluttering story. Almost asked someone for an empty box for donations. But I was decluttering a gift from them. Oops. I totally have the decluttering concept down, but enjoy listening to you for motivation. And, as someone from the US, I love to hear you say the Canadian "about". Makes me giggle. Please show yourself more love. Who's to say what "normal" is. We all ❤️ you just the way you are!
Omg I almost cried when you said you wouldn’t shame diabetec for needing insulin so why would you shame yourself because your brain doesn’t work. I have recently been wondering if I had adhd and I finally went to a psychiatrist who almost instantly said she was almost 100% certain I had adhd and I didn’t even go to her to ask that it was something completely different. I’ve been to a few psychiatrist in my 50yrs of living and this is the first time I think they got it right. The more I here people with adhd talk about how their life is the more I’m convinced that’s me! It’s like someone has been watching me and is telling my story (like that one song says lol)
I hope you are getting help, whether it is meds, or tips for living life w ADHD! I highly recommend Hello Brains- Jessica McCabe! She has a You tube channel and a book called How to ADHD! She is funny, relatable , compassionate and has a lot of helpful tips!
Hi Cas I can really relate to your ADHD journey! I was always labelled as "practical not academic" I finally tried to get my degree aged 40 years, and was very lucky to be able to do this. I was struggling to keep up with the essays and I talked to some of my classmates who suggested I get checked for dyslexia ... and guess what I finally got the dyslexia diagnosis! I got some assistance from the uni and got my degree!
But I have always struggled to get and especially keep organised having recently found you and seeing your channel has really helped and inspired me🤯 I have found out that I am a ladybug and my hubby is a butterfly this is sooooo game changing!!! We are starting to get there although it's taking a while but I have made a plan that is I will do one thing everyday .... I dont beat myself up anymore if I dont do a whole room, some days I just put the dishes away or tidy my shoes away, but often I do a little more, the point is I wont beat myself up / convince myself I'm a failure if I don't do the whole house! Thank you so much for everything you do! 🤩🤗
Decluttering with my husband is HARD! He is a collector of any type of sports memorabilia and keeps so much from his past. I need to get his TWO rooms actually put together and off the floor so we can get rid of the non essentials... wish me luck 😅
How has the decluttering gone with hubby?
Maybe a shelf ( you may already have one) and hang things up- maybe let him have one room- and you have the other!!
You are wonderful and I enjoy listening to you! You have helped me so much and you were meant to be who you are cause we need your sunshine and bluntness ❤❤❤❤
Thank you Cass for getting on the soap box others, like myself, don't have the guts for, don't take the time for, don't feel legitimate for, or are not even conscious we need! From one late diagnosed ADHDer who's stopped stuff getting in, overcome her emotional link with most clutter and still needs to work on her wish to sell items which are still sought after online cos I don't have the bandwidth to sell them.
After my husband passed and I was going thru stuff - mostly mine - that I just didn't want to give to goodwill or salvation army - my cousin had a place near her that took anything to give to ppl in their town that were needy and it took nothing for me to say - let's go - that was my main hold up - now that most of my house is declutter of visual clutter that place is no longer open so I just want to get rid of stuff so taking it to good will - same cousin is going to get house and everything when I pass and she was saying "thank you, ty, ty!!!!"
BTW I'm a butterfly and now I just need to go thru spare bedroom of little stuff and then drawers and such
I have all this time not realized I was a bee.... but when you laid it out about how my stuff being out doesn't bother me that it is just the amount of stuff... life shift. Also, calling in reinforcements to get over my shame/inability to start. Thank you for what you bring and your vulnerability.
I spent years feeling like a lazy slob. I got tired just thinking about doing things like dishes, laundry anything household things. My bedroom was a mess because that’s where I hide things then it was then horrible to clean. I just hated why I couldn’t change. I would leave my purse, lose keys. I desk at work was always a mess and I felt dumb all the time. I was 56 when I had a total melt down. I went on Vyavase and it worked but then they put me on a generic and it make me feel awful so know I am not on anything and I feel so cluttered.
That shirt is beautiful on you, Cass! It makes your eyes and skin look so pretty!
I love that about having an elective school course about decluttering. I always thought it was a great idea for homeschooling, add it to their curriculum!
I had 3 huge decluttering sessions, w/ the 3rd being the selling of my home. My family & I took carload after carload to donations, plus invited friends & family at get-togethers to go thru things. But I also stacked furniture, garden tools & decor, etc at the street. Most everything would be gone w/in hrs. Even invited some at the curb inside for more items. (Hopefully they weren't hoarders, but I did remove alot of stuff) And my home didn't even seem overly crowded as I was highly organized, but it was a 4 bedrm w/basement & sm attic. .. I downsized by picking my favorites, then picking my favorites again & again, until i was where i neeeded to be. .. It is helpful to continuously ask yourself 'what is relevant' at the stage you find yourself in.😊
Please, please, please don't wish to be any different than you are! I know you have difficulties that many people can't begin to understand, and that's hard. I have an adult sister who struggles with many of the things you mentioned and it can bring her down so badly but she is the highlight of my kids lives and I am so fortunate to have her in mine. I am sure there are many people who feel the same way about you. You are an inspiration to me and I thank you for speaking out and being so open about ADHD and all it's hurdles. And also for the great tips, tricks and encouragement with decluttering and organisation. Sending you lots of love and hugs❤❤
Please don't throw things away that are GOOD!!
We have a relationship with a local 2nd hand shop that will let me simply drop a bag off and leave. The first couple items were brand new shoes that had never been worn and i talked to the shop owner asking if i could bring them things that were too good to chuck in a bin at Goodwill.
Once i established trust that my items would be EASILY resealable, i no longer have to make it a whole big deal. Easy and it is so nice knowing someone else will get to enjoy items that just never fit in my family's life.
Half the Christmas presents we get go to her shop, still in the box 😂
I love your honesty about your feelings. I've made a lot of mistakes in my 60+ years judging or as you said perceiving others as well as being equally critical of myself. My Mom had a saying that everyone has a skeleton; you just don't know what is in other people's closets. This was her answer when I asked questions like "Why isn't our family..." I love you just the way you are and how you are relatable to so many people wanting to be heard. Thanks for all you do and share.
I love how you are! You are fun and beautiful and so honest. If I was in your neighborhood, we would be besties!❤
The talk of not wanting to give stuff to strangers, only to people you know really resonates with me. I work for the police and I worry about criminals coming into my house & casing it. Its a real thing. It happens all the time. But it paralyzes me. I presently have 2 tv stands in my living room because I can't get rid of the old one. I also have 2 washers & dryers in my basement. Same reason.
There are community resources and various groups that help with things like that, as far as helping people in need source the things they need. For example, an animal shelter probably needs a washer and dryer, or plenty of other places. Maybe you could contact another civil servant or entity like a social worker or the local domestic violence shelters or heck even schools have drives for stuff like that and see what they’ve got going on. Many organizations will come pick stuff up or at least help you find a way to get it there.
@kristafb1 Burglars want stuff they can carry & pawn, not old TV stands and W/D.
@@marylut6077 well I think the idea is they show up for the washer but they clock the MacBooks, Sonos, and whatever else of value and come back for it
We put things in front of the house- ppl will take it!!