Why Don't People Treat Me Like I Treat Them? |
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 16 ต.ค. 2024
- It can be so frustrating when others don’t treat us like we treat them, but we must understand that everyone is on a different point in their personal journey! Don’t let the actions of someone else keep you from being your most authentic self.
What’s going on TH-cam?! My name is Cyrus and I'm a speaker, author, and suicide prevention expert. I’ve dedicated my life to developing resources that help others overcome depression and suicide! I’ve created videos, programs, books, workbooks, and audiobooks because I understand each of us learns differently. My mission is for these resources to boost YOUR self-awareness and help YOU win YOUR war with mental health!
In this link, you can choose the education works best for you:
linktr.ee/cyru...
Reach out to me personally on Instagram! / cyrusausar
I’m open to all conversations (LITERALLY!) so PLEASE share your experience or suggest topics you feel I should speak on. I always look forward to each and every one of you sharing your perspective!
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cyrusausar.com/
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#growintogreatness #cyrusausar
Try treating them as they treat you. This really gets their attention.
I've done this multiple times and it doesn't solve anything instead , it just raises the fire, it makes me the enemy
Bbrsly, you were already the enemy by your mere existence. Do what feels good.
This is exactly what I was taught. But you shouldn’t in theory become less than to have mutual respect from others. You need to go where you are valued. Sometimes the more difficult path is the best one, which is finding like minded people. Please don’t lower your value, people like me who will support and respect you are out there.
They’re attention is not needed
It gives them false evidence against you this is why it's better to be more stoic about your response to them, I still think we owe them a response but don't do one with too much emotion tied to it because that is what they want, ammunition to make you look like the bad one to tell other people who will listen.
Distance is the safest form of a stress free life
Every one of my "friends" calls me a strange bird..I'd rather be myself than be them. But, sadly, I very recently detached myself from the three people who I considered to be the closest to me. They know of each other but are not friends without me. Anyway, they've all shown just how unimportant I am to their lives and how none of them respect me and my boundaries. It hurts me deeply to accept it and keep it no contact but I know that I deserve much better and I'll be lonely but at least I won't be treated badly.
I detached from everyone. I speak only to a few family members and it's very minimal (months go by before I make contact). I see the world much more differently after my life experiences. They don't understand my experiences so they resort to negativity. This is why I cut everyone off. In person I rarely meet like minded humans.
You’re smart … keep those people away .. I’ve distanced myself from people that were friends for over 40 years … the sun comes up and the world keeps turning
I know how you feel I give a 1000% and I am lost I am a stranger in my own life I put everyone before me there's a saying when you remove yourself from people's lives and they don't reach out to you you weren't very important in the first place learning how to accept this can be traumatic because you have to realize you have to let all these people go and then go live in peace
Same. I've gone pretty much no contact in the recent years. It's easier to just cut them out than me to feel disappointed over and over again. Each time I cut someone out, I feel empowered in some way.
Same
People ignore me too. I don't care. I treat everyone with respect. You have to meet and leave people where they are.
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Dude, I literally cannot have friends. At all! Because I’m just done tolerating what I consider to be either shitty behavior or people just not making any effort to be in my life or get to know me. I will not lower my standards. And for some reason the people I meet do not see my value. I have given up and am at the point that I just don’t even want to have anything but surface interactions now. I have one person in my life who sees me, gets me, values me, invests in me, and has learned how to deal with me when I’m upset. Anyone who wants to be in my life must do these things otherwise what is the point? Why should people get to just take what I give and not give back the equivalent? That sounds like a one way street if you ask me.
Amen! I’m 50 and have no friends because I don’t trust people. I’m 100% trustworthy, caring and respectful but I don’t feel people are the same. I used to have the big group of friends when I was younger, and many of them betrayed me, which doesn’t change as you get older. I still see so many people of all ages with lots of friends and there’s constant drama and betrayal. Someone’s having an affair with somebody’s boyfriend or somebody’s girlfriend., somebody’s been two-faced, or just plain unnecessary drama. Having friends is overrated and I don’t class.myself as better or perfect, I just know my self worth. I’m not unhappy or bitter, but I trust no one, except my family and my husband. Life experience has taught me that.
It's good to hear others are like I am. I don't understand why I'm treated poorly. Have I earned it in some cases, sure but not on the scale I've encountered.
I'm so confused and messed up by this.
I wish there was a clear answer.
@@brucelee6074 the only thing you can do is be the best you can be, if others don’t reciprocate that then that’s their problem. Love yourself and meditate, find who you are within yourself and you’ll find inner happiness - without the need for anyone’s validation. 🙏🏻
So true, words of Gold, my family is literally making me physically ill, my brothers bully me, and I can't tell them off, they are wealthy men, I am not was always black sheep, they treat me with total disregard 😢
Same here.Dont waste your time because not matter what you do people just draining.Try to work on your negative sides,work on ways to make people more comfortable etc.One thing i learn you are always the problem its never them.
Even strangers that I've never interacted with look at me like I'm a monster and whisper mean things.
People do that to me too I don't know why. I take a shower I get a fresh haircut I put on new clothes and people still look at me like I'm a fucking Abomination.
Could it be racism or agism?? 😢😢😢😢I prefer pets over people but Jeaus' main request was to have us love God and people. That's y I still try w people 😢😢😢😢 I try to stay away from mean ones as much as possible . I don't want to be part of their judgement .😮😮😮
People are a waste of time. Love yourself first. Never ever ever stop loving your self.never expected less
Self Love ❤️
I have to disagree, people are not a waste of time. Unconditional love takes patience, endurance and so much more but certain people are not willing to sacrifice for it for whatever reason. People will suffer the consequences of their bad choices but also be blessed for their good choices. If we serve our Holy Father then we are to do our part and leave the rest at the feet of our Holy Father. If you choose to be self centered then that is your choice. God bless you! (Ask yourself, are you a waste of time?)
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Bad take.
People are not a waste of time, but you can "waste" your time on the "wrong" people (quotation marks because no time is ever really wasted, every encounter is a learning opportunity). You can get burned and think you need to be alone, that no one can possibly fit you and that everyone else doesn't match up to you. Truth is there are people who are worth your time who will match where you are at, but for the honest matches in friendship, love, etc., you need to be your most honest, authentic self. Otherwise you're just going to run into people who reflect the false identity that you've settled for because you're too afraid to step into who you know you can and want to be.
As long as you _think_ people are a waste of time, you will end up with people who don't respect their time with you.
@@Mr.Meowgical nah, bad take, first guy is closer, most people are hateful and just want to tear you down
I've been treated horribly my whole life. I don't like it but I guess I don't have much choice. I'm abused by most people
You deserve better going forward NOBODY NOBODY will.mistreat you DEMAND RESPECT
me too girl. i just dont trust people anymore
@@corsicanlulu me 3, fam
Treat people kind if they show you disrespect cut ties
I really needed this. I always try to approach the world with empathy and people are mostly piranhas looking to take what they can from people. It is exhausting.
I am guilty of having somewhat loose boundaries and i found out the hard way when you say "yes" alot of times the time that you say "no" you learn just how little people respects you.
I cried my soul out yesterday wondering “why my friend don’t treat me the way I treat her?” “Why she always choose other people over me” and now I get it. I guess she was raised to choose the wrong people over me and I wanna say I don’t blame her, but I do. I do.
Anyway, I liked every second of your video, thank you so much!
Same my friends have always treated me badly choosing others over me then I stopped making frnds I was in a relationship then he cheated on he I forgave him instantly but haha he broke up anyways I feel like I would never be loved
Me to I have given them every thing they gave me nothing I want u all to be my friend like I am
Love u all❤
We are responsible for our actions, it is responsible to blame her.
In a similar video by Jocko Wilink the concept was: like a dog, if someone does something you dont like growl!
Otherwise you train people to treat you poorly without realizing it.
Don’t worry girl! Friends are overrated - move on, love yourself and you’ll find your people ❤
2:37 And, this is why, in a nutshell, people are a waste of my time and I gave up on them for a reason. People have no respect these days.
The question is why people treat others in my very same place, conditions and mental states with empathy and understanding but they ignore me or abuse me. This is what stings the most. Not only not receiving a glimpse of humanity once in a while but seeing that everyone who's equally vulnerable and smart as me is getting it while I'm not. It makes me wonder what I'm doing wrong existing...
By the way, thank you for your video, it's a warm reminder of how people work
So true .
It was very accurate
That's what I'm dealing with everyday of every second Cyrus. I feel like an alien come to earth trying to figure out humans.
Me too 😔
Now I understand. This has been bugging me for too long.. always see the best in people.. Thanks for this.. It's great to hear that I am simply more evolved than these type of people I've met in all walks of life.
Thank you . My whole life I have be treat so poorly and I can take it anymore more.Im 16 and everyone told me it becomes better but it doesn't I can take it anymore.I treat people like gold.I come from a broken home and everyone treats me badly.People hate me they don't like to see me happy.
Sooo relatable. And you're right...these toxic people dont change even as adults.Focus on PROTECTing your own energy
Focus on yourself. Do what you can to move out when you can. Find refuge where you feel peace
Take care. It takes time to find the right people.Some will never change but others are good. It took me a long time to find a friend.But I succeeded. So will you.
I want to see you happy, and I don't even know you! And as another comment said... it takes time to find somewhere you belong with people you understand and they understand you. A lot of us felt the same way in high school. Most of the rude, nasty people in high school grow up to be full-out losers later. Trust me on that. You'll see it at your reunions or hear about it. I personally didn't find a close few friends until college. I didn't join a sorority, but just by virtue of my major and the classes I took, I met some people who had similar interests. Then from there came projects and other groups or activities where you'll find people with similar views.
I know not everyone wants to go away for college but I think it did a world of good for my self confidence and set the course for much better relationships. If I had stayed home and took a job out of high school I can only imagine where I'd be now 😮 I don't know for sure, of course, but I know my world would be much smaller and lonely. Now I look back at some of those people from my high school who were awful towards myself and others and they are in some time warp still thinking they are the kings or queens in life when most of them are now married and divorced miserable alcoholics. By the time I graduated high school I can honestly say there was only one person in my life I felt truly loved me and that was my Grandfather. He was my rock and my best friend.
I know it sounds simple but just do your best, and if you even have one person in this world right now who you know loves you, then you are very lucky. They will see you through until you can find more friends and loved ones whom you can trust.❤
I have been so kind to people and am a beautiful woman they abuse me
Same here. I'm a wonderful person and I get nothing but abuse so so much for what you put out you get back
I really don't understand I try my hardest to treat everyone with so much kindness. I literally treat them kinder than I treat myself. I just really don't understand why they treat me so awful. They act as if I'm a terrible person. The more I look the more I see how hated and and how many people don't like me. I don't understand I don't wanna be like one of those people and eye for an eye. But it is so hard I see myself like getting so mad and upset and its not me. I'm not that guy but its so hard not to.
I grew up in a home from parents who were selfish,abusive,addictions etc. but growing up I stayed good to people I never used the excuse that I wasn't brought up good.. I do me. I still have trouble making friends and when I do the last about a week and then they just completely stop talking to me it's been like that my whole life where if I do make a friend once they get what they want from me they abandoned the friendship.
Do not think that you're alone, cuz even I face somewhat similar situations that you've faced. Continue being a good person cuz God has planned smtng really great for you❤❤
@@snrnikhil964 thank you I believe that as well ❤️🩹
I fell upon this video, and NO ONE has ever explained this in such an icuteful way. I'm a subscriber now.
You can still treat people with respect. If not walk away.
Need to find others who are advanced also. I don’t want to stoop down to force respect or boundaries from others I rather just communicate and work with better people.
Treat people the way you want to be treated,, worst advice i was ever given...
Because this is intended for shitty ppl who wouldn't want to be treated the awful way they treat others
I’ve just had a situation where a girl is being really mean to me bringing up trauma past experiences in front of strangers to get a laugh at my expense. It makes so much sense now. THAnk YOU SO MUCH !!
Please if u know u are a good a person,just stay away from that person because the manipulation won’t end,most times this people see u as a tool to use to get to what they want,am talking from experience life has Changed people care more about things now than other people,my advice only is if u are a good person,but if u are bad please delete my comment thank you.
What I don't get is that some of my "friends" are so well adjusted, successful etc (high up the mountain).. yet still don't treat me with kindness/ respect I always show them. I'm not talking about banter- that's good, but just not taking me seriously, when they do treat others that way.. there's a social hierarchy aspect to it, that I wish we could all just break out of.. its almost tempting to play that game of feeling better than others and undermining them subtly but I hate it so much. I just want friends that have my back like I have theirs
Amen .
Im so down with DAILY UNFAIRNESS FROM stpd people.. and THIS REALLY HELPS.. TQ. GOD BLESS U..
The more I've grown, the fewer friends I have and it's so lonely. It's not that I'm mistreated per say, but they go out of their way for other people but never me despite me having gone above and beyond for them for years. I find myself constantly worrying what I've done wrong or haven't done that makes this the case, but my therapist has helped me see the sad reality that most people in life are not capable of my level of emotional understanding
I am close to breaking but pushing myself forward.
I just thought this at work because for some reason ever since I was a little people would try to text me, or treat me a certain way, even though I gave them a certain level of respect. There was a small percentage of time when I was in high school that I set boundaries and I was very firm. But I was disconnected from my household at the time which was a good thing considering I come from a narcissistic family system so when I got back around my family, they broke down my boundaries and made it seem like they were a bad day so now I have to going nocontact from my family. I am really learning to set boundaries and become the best version of myself without feeling wrong for not falling in line to work toxic people say
No body treats me like a man or human
Me too bro
@@sorayasayeh9135get in the gym bro! do martial arts. empower yourself, you're strong.
I am a software developer and I don't wanna talk to anyone at my job and deep down I know that they don't care if I exist or not. I am away from my home for 6 months now and still not able to make new cconnection that make me happy. Is the whole world lying or just me. Do they not want me or just simple humans don't exist anymore?
"That's a messed up thing. How can I get penalized for being further along in the process?". You made me just cry. Since the age ~4 I've been working so hard to understand, heal, understand, heal transgenerational traumata.. and others being grateful? The difficult thing is, I ain't no Guru yet either. So if I get "penalized", I usually see where I need to improve my character. What helps is to remember that the Higher Self/Consciousness sees the effort. Throughout history there have always been singular souls that have been further along the process, more or less. Eventually, in some form, we'll reap the rewards.
KEEP RISING TO THE TOP
I really do be thinking I can fix people with one conversation
I'm really sorry
I keep expecting like hoping people to treat the same way as i do to them, but my expectations and hopes keep getting betrayed... To the point that i break down, and lashes out to them, saying that they're rude for not treating me the same way as i treat them... I keep saying that everyone should be grateful that i even do a lot of things to ease their burden, but they didn't bat an eye, even for once, at all.
I'm just sad that i've become such an entitled person... And all of my self improvement plan and everything just kind of fell apart since it's back to square one for me, and the ones who treat me bad don't even feel guilty about it
And somehow my self hatred grows even more... And here i am looking for answers, and thank god i was able to see this video...
I will try my best to reduce my expectations toward others because we're born in different times and circumstances... I should've known this from start, yet i keep ignoring this fact... I'm really sorry
Keep your expectations low and you will never be disappointed. - Kratos the God of war
I hear you sir. Truth. This is a tough lesson. People seem to be able to say whatever they want but if I say anything remotely close to or even less brash but similar to than what they said, I get the weird looks, shocked and appalled stares like I physically slapped them . Smh. I don't get why I get treated differently if I do or say the same thing other people always do or say. Or this as well. I am naturally a congratulating person. I share people's triumphs and and am genuinely happy for people, however I rarely get the same treatment. Smh. It's crazy. I'm still waiting to meet my tribe. Until then, I pray I just keep my boundaries in check to avoid putting myself out there in order to be ignored, embarrassed and or mistreated. Smh
This is so good so true! Thank you brother. I had to realize that their lives are their lives and I can't suffer myself for them because they CHOOSE not to grow up or see what you're showing them. It took me the light to see things on even level to maturity and moreso not get USED behind people who make excuses. I'm so sick of people taking my kindness and not listening to imparted wisdom and previous experience of life. Now , I have to let them fall into wanting to learn. Some people learn better in the burn than in listening with glistening. Saving myself. I'm finally learning to let people go without harming or hindering my life. They will be ok.
Well they may not be ok….. but that’s their problem.. remember they would never listen to advice or suggestions no matter what… so…. They will have to learn on their own
This hit me like a Tonna bricks I really needed to hear this may God continue to bless you on your journey as you are a blessing to others 💕🙏🏾💕🙏🏾
Thank you cyrus for shedding light on this topic because I would wonder why I'm not being treated the same way i treat others.
Another gem Cyrus thank you 🙏🏽 love seeing my people with their eyes wide open
They’re the first ones to say that we are all one! What?!
Exactly this... They don't seem to get it...but I feel I have always treated people with kindness...those that don't, including some members of family, I have distance myself.... Even my sister in law treats me awful, so she can jog on now.... I just don't know why they can't see it. I am an empath, always has been but I will not tolerate others treating me with disrespect.... Thank you for this.
me too
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Me too
Its right, i am always treat people with nice way and care them like they are mine. But when we met at first time they treat me like they can't live without me , now they treat me poorly and ignore me at any point
What you're saying reminds me of crabs in a barrel. They always try to pull down the ones who are higher so everyone can be on the same level & miserable together
Ok, but it’s still unreal that in 18 years of life I didn’t get a single soul treating me even similarly to how I used to treat them. I know that there are people out here that may have it worse somehow, but I still think it cannot be possible that I did not found anyone reciprocating my feelings and efforts.
I just want to Thank you.
I’ve been trying to figure this out forever, and you just answered my question! Thank you! ❤ It’s the only thing that makes sense!
Thank you for saying the TRUTH
Always been a tough one for me but you put an acceptable reason onto this topic.
Thank you. Sometimes I need someone to tell me these things.. the world can make me so tired sometimes
Really great perspective. There’s a lot more behind a situation... and I appreciate you helping us understand it
This is one of the most beautiful topics I've come across,thank you
This shit really hit home for me Fam well done
greetings from san francisco!, thx cyrus very helpful!
Brilliant perspective, bro thank you much love
I thought I was losing it. Thank you
I'm a good person with family members coworkers friends etc but I don't get birthday gifts phone calls and I give birthday gifts 🎁 but I don't know what is the reason 😢
Its very rare someone treats you like you treat them and that expectation and reciprocation is kind of unhealthy to me. I feel people(that respect and love you) treat you exactly how you've communicated your boundaries within an area of compromise of their beliefs. Often friends, colleagues and loved ones will make an effort to adapt to your needs. The saying goes treat others as they would like to be treated and if you dont know them then you default to as you would like to be treated. Imo
Great! This is the cure to busy bodies that try to tell you what to think!
Thanks!!!!
Thank you. Im humble and kind but my roomates are losing me soon, fed up and feeling used, ignored, disrespected like, This isn't my place, can't have guns, like a couple of fruit loops telling me, mmmmmm ok.
UR 2 Kool!! Great message, thank you 💜
Much respect. That's spot ON!
Bro thank you so much you are saving me fr 💯
Thanks man I really had to realize this
You are SO right, Cyrus.
Thank you for another great video.
Thank you for this and your other videos. I just discovered you and have gotten so many aha moments since watching your videos❤
Especially in college. I hate college. But I need college to help me get my High School Diploma.
You need to add strong emotional ties. There are people who know what is right but have an emotional tie they are unwilling to break from.
In Australia we call this "tall poppy syndrome"
Great video
Thank you, I appreciate this message
Well explained!
This helped, a lot. Thank you❤️
This makes sense. I unfortunately am the person in the lower position. It is informative to hear how it must feel for the person I just blew up at. It makes me feel that I am at least right that she and I should part ways. It's not fair to her for me to bring her down, and it makes me feel worse about myself to compare myself to her and see how much better off she is than I am. So much so, that she doesn't have time for me. And it's all because of our differentiated parentage. I came to this video wanting to find out why my friend didn't honour my birthday when I always honor hers. She's too busy, and maybe she's ready to part ways. It's not that I didn't treat her well on a regular basis. I suffered 8 years of neglect from her. And I decided enough was enough. Either I am an important person to her, or I'm not. But I do need to learn more about who I am as a person. I just don't think I want to be friends with people in a higher socioeconomic class than me anymore.
So true, thank you
Man this hit
Good word my brother
Great. I'm mire advanced them most people I knew or know now. They were horrible.
Great advice
Really its something helping me understand, because I wasn't just getting 😂😂
Powerful video
I need to socialise and pray
Subbed! I dig youe mindset, thank you. ❤, Sadie
People ain’t sh!!!!
Its a wrong question to ask in the first place I think. If you change your questions, you change your perspective, and if you do that, you change your life
Top top video! ❤
Exactly
If you experienced love as a child you will have the tendency to feel and think that they are like you.
I know what love is. It is that unconditional emotion/feeling for someone in your life that helped raise you to adulthood. But that other kind of love, nope. I have no clue what that shit is. It sounds like a waste of my time.
@@JustLeaveMeAlone654 Thank you! You are talking about the different levels of consciousness theoretically referred to in The David R. Hawkins Map of Consciousness.
Luke 6:48 He is like a man which built an house, and digged deep, and laid the foundation on a rock: and when the flood arose, the stream beat vehemently upon that house, and could not shake it: for it was founded upon a rock.
Luke 6:49 But he that heareth, and doeth not, is like a man that without a foundation built an house upon the earth; against which the stream did beat vehemently, and immediately it fell; and the ruin of that house was great.
It is unfortunate that people treat each other badly. It is unforgivable if those people are the one close to you.
Matthew 18:7
Between Cyrus and Tim Fletcher, i think, for the first time, ill.really be alright.
Just found you man. Thanks for this, sucks.
Amen!
so I'm morally superior, thanks for the confirmation
next time someone tries to insult me to get off my high horse, I'll say that it's not possible because it is true that I'm more morally evolved than them
If one was to get off of a high horse of MORAL superiority, where would they get off to?
@@CyrusAusar2 they want to bring you down to their level, be become selfish and apathetic like them so they don't feel threatened
The problem is not everyone wants to be treated the same. If I followed the gold rule and treated others the way I want to be treated I would be in jail.
So I'm forced by society to treat others in a way I don't want to be treated.
My problem is people keep treating me the way THEY want to be treated instead of the way I want to be treated and expect me to be grateful.
get into bdsm scene
Why do they have to abuse though?
4:24 People can see it, they just choose not to live right
Maybe we are that next species after homo sapien sapien.
people treat me like shit 😢😭
I would love to have a conversation with you. I am fatigued. I would appreciate your help. How may we connect?.
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