Gonna have to say I disagree with you guys on the emotional cheating thing, if my partner is messaging someone on the side romantically I’d 100% consider it cheating
Emotional cheating is definitely a thing. If someone is saying "I miss you so much, I can't wait to hold you in my arms and kiss you, I want to feel you" to someone outside of their relationship they are cheating. Physical cheating is just the easiest to define and an extreme form of cheating.
Emotional cheating by its meaning is that you look at someone else and go "oh that person is so cute" in their mind but they wont actually go to the person and cheat.
i’m pretty sure i’ve emotionally cheated before, its making me so guilty. the thoughts can never be stopped, but it seems my needs can never be fulfilled. :(
@@dennraeh I would suggest therapy for that! It's actually really helpful and if you're able to reach out to the person who you cheated on (if they're willing to talk), you can learn about how it affected them and make sure not to repeat it. You can't change the past, but you can always attempt to make amends.
Emotional cheating is worse than physical cheating. Emotions can linger or stuck forever while physical acts happen only in the present then move on after.
It depends on the specifics. Physical is easy- you either willingly engaged in sexual physical contact with someone else or not- but emotional is very vague and could mean a lot of things. People can only control their physical actions, not their thoughts and emotions
@@music0cool Yes that's true emotions are hard to control. But when you are in a committed relationship, and then go talk to someone else and get that same level of intimacy, it becomes a problem. You must figure out who is the one you want to be loyal to, and then break up if it's the person you are just now catching feelings to. If you want to maintain your relationship, stay loyal to your ''original'' partner. I don't get what's so hard about this.
@@music0cool you can’t control your thoughts or emotions😭 that’s bs. It’s so much easier to talk to someone and open up then to do intercourse. Like you know how much work it is to get up and do that? Way easier to talk. So speak for yourself smoothbrain
To everyone asking why people cheat: People are stupid sefish and want the best of both worlds. Its like you want someone else but you dont want to lose the safety net of your current partner. Everyone has their own personal reasons to cheat, but none of them are valid.
i was telling a friend about how a past lover cheated on me, and she suddenly got mad and exploded saying that cheating is ‘poly-phobic’ and ‘love isnt real, just have sex.’ and its just upsetting
@@iluvmybf0705 Poly has been accepted in the past and experimented with. It failed _terribly!_ So, it’s a fad once again which will end with much regret. One doesn’t need to be aware of much biology and psychology to know why such relationships are doomed. It’s all kind of funny really.
I told my husband the first day we started dating that "If you ever cheat on me just break up with me, because Once I find out we are breaking up anyway."
I told my ex that I would rather he break up with me than to cheat. He still cheated on me and I hate his guts. People who cheat are selfish and don't care about their partners safety. They are the scum of the earth right next to murders.
@@szarwi fair enough. Its hard to trust after being cheated on, but dont be afraid. There’s trustworthy people out there, dont ignore the red flags and use your best judgment!
I find it so strange that it has to be said that cheating is bad and should never be encouraged or allowed. I was raised to understand cheating was bad since I was a young boy, do people seriously have no sense of guilt or shame? I'm sorry for what you had to go through, I know being cheated on would mentally break me so I can't really blame you for having a form of irrational fear due to it, it's truly the epitome of breaking trust.
Yea some people r afraid of confrontation and they probably know that the other person wouldn’t agree and would just leave them but they don’t want to lose their partner so they just do it secretly
People who cheat are just insecure and don’t see self worth in themselves. If they’re in a monogamous relationship they see their partner as a badge or a trophy. Once they get a trophy, they’ll try to claim more feeling that they can find some self worth in it all
I agree on this one, as someone who has done that, I had horrible self esteem issues, mostly because of my bf. Getting other guys made me feel good during an otherwise depressive period. Just decided to stay out of this whole relationship thing, so I can work on myself, respect the person I am with, and be respected too.
Just wanted to add. Polyamory ≠ an open relationship. Poly mostly means that instead of one monogamous partner you have multiple, most often 2 so cheating is just as plausible as in a monogamous. An Open relationship is the one you guys are thinking of. In an open relationship there's little to no boundaries so it's often not cheating (however it's still possible)
“Poly” _can_ work provided it’s akin to traditional polygamy. A harem of women type arrangement is practical when they’re all besotted with the same guy, but multiple guys sharing a woman is constantly in fail mode whether the participants are aware of it or not. Of course, people often override the realities with some internal fantasy. There’s very little incentive for _anyone_ to remain faithful these days, even amongst a supposedly committed huddle of freaks.
I only got one right, I guessed the last one correctly. She cheated. There’s no question about it. My theory about her is she seems like the type of person to want any sort of validation whatsoever. That means taking it whenever possible. She will take any affection she can possibly get because she probably doesn’t have a great sense of self. She’s probably depressed and maybe even suicidal. She has tattoos which could be used to cover up cuts. She has the colorful hair because she wants attention. She has clothes on that show the tiniest bit of skin because she wants attention but also hides a lot of her skin because she feels insecure. Depressed people looking for validation have a uniform, and she fits it to the T. I got the other 5 wrong, so maybe I don’t have a great sense of character in terms of cheating. But with her the signs are so strong that it’s hard to get it wrong.
LOW SELF ESTEEm is why people like myself are drawn towards toxicity. we feel we deserve to be punished. and so many people are like this. Its sad. but very true.
In what sense do you mean you feel you deserve to be punished? Like how does that apply to relationships? I’m not asking rhetorically I’m just trying to understand
Nice try, but that’s a big “nope.” It’s really just down to the primitive female brain mistaking “toxic” behaviour for the dominant (“alpha”) traits that it reproductively desires. There’s no need to complicate things with pseudo-psychological attempts at self analysis.
I do not have one yet, but I want to get one. If you like it & you think it looks good on you then you shouldn't take it out just because people have opinions that do not accurately represent who you are. Everything about anyone can be generalized in a negative way by somebody, but it does not define who you are. For example: "blondes are dumb" "brunettes are boring" "people with blue hair are crazy" Just because people stereotype that doesn't mean it is true to everybody with blue hair, for example.
At the end they say that correlation = causation and that he’s gonna argue with his maths teacher showing that he does know it’s not true and that it’s just a joke Edit: actually it’s only Pegasus who says it, so it is possible Connor thought it was true and Pegasus said it as a joke
I believe toxic men are some people's type because for some reason media loves to romanticize male trauma. When closed-off individuals open up about their messed up past it often creates a form of trauma bonding. "Oh he's not actually a bad person he's just had a bad upbringing." This causes women to sympathize with their abuser and feels relatively closer to him than they normally do with more well-adjusted partners. I fell victim to this in my teen years when my partner opened up to me about his abusive household which caused me to do the same. Even after his cheating, to this day, I'm still scared if he ever asked to get back together I'd most likely agree.
not just men tbh, many toxic women are seen as "girlbosses" that don't take shit from nobody while they're literally abusing their partner or anyone else . it's disgusting for both
The pink haired girl's 'young and dumb' one time is likely the most common kind of cheating, aside from not communicating and thus not getting what you need in a relationship.
It's wild to me how many people don't know what emotional cheating is. No, it's not finding some random stranger cute and forgetting about them. No, it's not having a crush on someone else. It's what you do about those thoughts and feelings. It's your actions and words that moves it to emotional cheating. Is having a random thought about someone you'll never see again going to affect your relationship if you don't talk about it or act on it? No, it won't. Now does that mean that having a crush on someone else while you're in relationship is okay? No, it's not okay but why? What's the difference? You don't forget a crush from one day to another and it's not just about physical attraction. That's someone you know or have interacted with at the very least but it is not a stranger you'll never see and think about again. What's important is what you do with that crush. Will you take action in order to nip it in the bud or will you sit back or, worse, will you encourage it to grow? 1. Of course, nipping it in the bud is the right thing to do and the best way to avoid "accidently" (and I say "accidently" because some people don't realise it's a crush right away but once you are aware of any kinds of feelings towards someone else and do anything but nip it in the bud, that's where you make the conscious choice to not be respectful of your partner) cheat. The best way to kill a crush (not the person, of course, but the "more than friendly" feeling for that other person) is to reduce contact or fully cut contact. 2. The second choice which is to sit back and do nothing can really go either which is why it's not the most effective option but it is less extreme and easier. The crush could naturally die over time or it could grow stronger which will eventually make it more difficult to get rid of. 3. Last choice is to encourage the crush by hanging out or talking with them regurlarly. More one-on-one interactions, sharing intimate information, flirting, s3xting, anything that is more than friendly and that doesn't (wouldn't) sit right with your partner. All those actions are considered emotional cheating because you are investing emotionally with someone else. For everyone who will say "but we can't control our feelings", you can't necessarily prevent the apparition of a crush but you absolutely can control what you do about it (see above) and if you think it's too hard to actually nip the crush in the bud, maybe you should simply consider leaving your partner. If you consciously choose to keep the other person, you are actively NOT choosing your partner and that should tell you something. No, cutting a friend off isn't easy but if you find yourself in that situation, you'll eventually have to choose unless your partner finds out and decides to choose themselves. What's easier? Choosing between a friend that you have a small crush on and the partner you claim you love or choosing between a friend that you have a huge crush on and the partner you claim to love? The earlier you choose, the easier it will be and the higher the possibility of you being able to go back to being just friend with the other person. (Another example why it's harder to be friends with ex-partners because the feelings were once so strong, they can tend to come back more easily) Emotional cheating can lead to physical cheating and vice-versa. Either way, you are being disloyal to your partner while breaking their trust and boundaries and that's what cheating is. Both can and will leave a scar on the partner. It doesn't matter if you think that one or the other is worse because they are both horrible.
So the reason they keep asking about poly relationships is that they would know if one person isn't "enough" for them. People often discover that one person isn't enough for them by previously cheating on people, probably every single time. Poly is a last resort arrangement for a cheater. (Just my observation as a romance-loving, married monogamous woman who has never cheated or been cheated on before in her life. But I *have* seen how other relationships work.)
@@LessPegasus I know too much because I was the friend that everyone came to for relationship advice, even though they'd disregard and ignore that advice again and again. 🤣 I know about all the skeletons in my friends' closets. I don't judge, but what I've seen has brought me to some fairly solid and reliable conclusions about the psychology of cheaters and people who are open to poly relationships.
Polyamory isn't always a last resort for a cheater. Several of my friends are in poly relationships either to try it out because they're curious, they don't have a preference towards monogamy or polyamory, or because they just knew that one person wouldn't be enough. I don't think any of these individuals have ever cheated
Poly is not a last resort arrangement for a cheater. People who are in/have been in (a) poly relationship(s) are still able to partake happily & loyally in a monog relationship. Poly is not correlative to a cheater or to someone who is likely to cheat. It is instead an agreement that the partners in the relationship have feelings for more than one person at that given time & are communicative of that.
There are 3 kind of cheaters: Self discovery, generally young people that don't know what they want. Thrill seekers, like doing dangerous things, would leave the door open just for the thrill Emotional people, the smart ones will never be caught because they're sociopaths, the dumb ones are the ones who got caught
People can cheat in poly relationship depending on how they define their boundaries. Poly doesn't equal open relationship. You could for example have a closed off throuple (3 people dating each other) or one person who dates multiple people but one to all partners only date that one partner etc etc. It comes in incredibly many forms a lot of which leave room for cheating but yeah statistically it would still be less likely. I'm not poly so if I made a mistake feel free to correct me. I do appreciate that you kinda fought the stigma of poly = cheating!
I know the "Pansexual Serial Monogamist" breaks people's brains but it's a thing. Pansexual is a sexuality identity, being Monogamous generally reflects your moral perspective. It doesn't make you any more likely to cheat than someone who is straight.
I’ve never met (in person) an attractive person in a polyamorous relationship or a cheater. Obviously I’ve ever met everyone, but in my personal experience none of them have been attractive.
@@amandak.4246 communicating ur desires before acting on them is the only way to build meaningful connections. if uve developed feelings for some1 outside of the relationship yes that sucks for ur partner but being upfront and asking for an open relationship atleast gives ur partner the option to walk away. by acting without first asking thats what breaks the trust
Nose piercing and hair dye here. Cheated once sorta. I tried leaving the relationship and he said he would ruin my life if I left him so I emotionally "cheated" with another guy who eventually helped me out of the situation. It was romantic via text, no pics or anything. So technically I emotionally cheated but it was the best thing for me.
I'm just gonna put this out here, might be wrong. But I think pegasus is confusing open relationships as polygamous. There is a difference Open relationships= sleeping with others outside the person your dating with your partners consent Polygamous= dating more than one person with both of your partners being aware of one another and allowing you to date the other with no cheating.
cheating still exists in poly relationships. i’m open table poly for instance. everyone has separate parameters regarding loyalty but what boundaries you put in place to uphold that really counts. there’s never a valid reason for anyone to cheat
@@AlexanderLarkovsky-tg5to from hat i could understand from that comment your most likely describing and abuser they bring you down to have more control over you
Cheating hurts, real bad if you actually are in love. Even text’s , just normal talking or a simple heart wont hurt anyone but if you say you want to do sexual things with the other one and flirt alot , it is 100% cheating, at least it will feel like it for the not-cheating one
Emotional cheating is a thing yet let me explain something: You can feel infatuation for someone while in a relationship, yet VERBALLY acting out on that is cheating. Emotional cheating is actively acting upon your emotions for another. Like If I had a crush on a friend while in my current relationship and told that individual sweet nothings....that's cheating. If I decide not to go after my emotions, like a logical individual, let the infatuation die out, that isn't cheating. Having feelings isn't cheating, acting upon them is cheating. Edit: realized I forgot too add that daydreaming about another individual is considered acting upon your feelings. Also some people are apparently way to dumb to comprehend the differences between love, lust, and infatuation. If you're one of THOSE idiots I recommend you look up what they mean before commenting. Don't call people babes, that's as cringey as your lack of intelligence.
Yes babes switching your feelings to someone else IS cheating even if you havent done anything else yet 💀 stop looking for copouts, if a person no longer loves the current SO they should break up period.
@@chronicmelancholic so catching feelings which is OUT of your control is cheating not the action of acting on them is what you're saying? I've had crushes on people while dating yet they went a way very quickly and I never acted on them (I usually then get dumped not really related but yeah) so I'm a cheater ? Is that what you're saying everyone that has had a crush (including celebrity crushes that will NEVER EVER HAPPEN) ever while in a relationship is cheating do you hear yourself? Also you have to catch the feelings before you leave the relationship so by your logic it doesn't even matter at that point you are already a cheater my brain cells actually committed unalive trying to comprehend your stupidity you have actually made me dumber and I implore you to shut up before you make the entire human race dumber
Absolutely agree. It's the acting upon feelings that is cheating whether verbally or physically. We can't control our emotion per say but we definitely can control if and how we act on them. If you're in a relationship but start to have a crush on a friend, you should reduce or cut contact with that person until the feelings have died off. You can't help feelings from arising but you can definitely nip the in the bud to avoid the slippery slope. That's also why when your partner feels uncomfortable with someone you know and asks you to not talk to them anymore that you respect their request (assuming this is a healthy, sane, stable and not controlling partner making that request)
@@chronicmelancholic infatuation is different than love. You're an idiot lol and I'm not justifying my behavior because I've never cheated nor had feeling for anyone other than my man. I'm explaining the differences. If you feel so inclined to attack me, go for it. I'm explaining. Infatuation dies within weeks. The issue is people like you cannot comprehend the differences between Love, lust, and infatuation.
I think some ppl cheat cuz they get off to the excitement of doin smthn behind another's back, while others are too much of a coward to just be honest. Or maybe they get bored of the relationship and decide to cheat to spice things up but they wanna stay with the partner cuz they provide smthn for em. Or maybe the partner is reallly toxic and they cheat cuz they afraid sayin smthn will get em hurt or smthn idk.
As a poly person, I can say it's definitely possible to cheat in a poly relationship (since each relationship still has rules + boundaries, even if they're as minimal as, "IDC who you shag, just don't do it in _our_ bed, okay?" or, "No barebacking with other ppl"), you just have to work harder to do it & it feels like even more of a betrayal bc of that.
A person that talks a lot and overshares is almost always needy, therefore they most likely would be a cheater if let's say their girlfriend or boyfriend isn't talking to them or listening to them which would make them feel in loved which would make them cheat. Right when she said she might talk too much I immediately thought cheater. Possibly has a personality disorder.
As a nosering girl with coloured hair, I havent cheated ever. I have been cheated on and I would never do that to another person. Cheaters deserve jail no cap
Being attracted to toxic men: childhood trauma, my experience with it has been that im used to a chaotic household so I find comfort in chaotic relationships. Healthy relationships are uncomfortable and boring, super outside the norm so they feel like theyre not meant for you and that youre not deserving of them anyway.
The reason they ask about the Poly is because the majority of people in poly would cheat in a monogamous relationship. They are non-committal people who are just there for the sex and often come from traumatic experiences or severe loneliness. A majority of the people I have asked about their personal poly relationships and most of them have severe relationship trauma. So, when it comes to relationships, please commit or quit. Sex is a bonding experience that really hits hard. If you make it generic, you passively become more and more depressed.
I may have misunderstood this comment but that just sounds like friendship to me. Isn't it normal to talk about personal issues with your friends? Especially best friends.
Just to help into more detail emotional cheating is not mostly sexually based. It's when you have romantic feelings for another individual and as such you put more time into your relationship with them as opposed to your current partner. If you feel more romantically attached to your friends and homies and act as such it's emotional cheating. Also if you think when your partner ever leaves you they'll be the first one you'll date next you're emotionally cheating, because you have already been mentally checked out of your current relationship.
Women might want a “toxic relationship” for the same reason as wanting the “bad boy.” They’re attracted to certain personality traits called the “Dark Triad”, and mistake that for confidence, and competence.
As a polyamorus person, keep in mind that the key is consent. If you are with someone but you also want to see other people, if your partner is not comfortable with it, DO NOT SEE OTHER PEOPLE. If your partner seems hesitant but reluctantly says yes, I'd say it's safer to not see other people. Have a conversation about it. Do not try to convince them they should let you. If they say no, it means no. Simple as that.
In all my life I’m glad I can say I’ve never betrayed anybody close to me. And that’s more than those cheaters can ever say. If you cheat, you’re heinous.
Most people cheat because they have the opportunity to do so. Don't commit to someone if you want to sleep around, just be upfront with your intentions.
But we also have to remember that for every cheater there are probably two cheaters who have twisted the story enough to convince themselves that they’re not a cheater.
I’ve been w my partner almost 2 months and we’d been friends for 5 of them. I really can’t imagine ever cheating on him or him doing the same to me. It breaks my heart a little, because I understand some people do but I can’t fathom why. It seems like a preventable issue-communicate before you cheat w/ someone else.
Gonna have to say I disagree with you guys on the emotional cheating thing, if my partner is messaging someone on the side romantically I’d 100% consider it cheating
Agreed
@hithere4236 agreed, way worse honestly
fair point tbh
Right
I agree.
Emotional cheating is definitely a thing. If someone is saying "I miss you so much, I can't wait to hold you in my arms and kiss you, I want to feel you" to someone outside of their relationship they are cheating. Physical cheating is just the easiest to define and an extreme form of cheating.
Emotional cheating by its meaning is that you look at someone else and go "oh that person is so cute" in their mind but they wont actually go to the person and cheat.
i’m pretty sure i’ve emotionally cheated before, its making me so guilty. the thoughts can never be stopped, but it seems my needs can never be fulfilled. :(
@@dennraeh I would suggest therapy for that! It's actually really helpful and if you're able to reach out to the person who you cheated on (if they're willing to talk), you can learn about how it affected them and make sure not to repeat it. You can't change the past, but you can always attempt to make amends.
@@callista8434 thank you so much for the suggestion!! that actually meant a lot. i will try
Emotional cheating is worse than physical cheating. Emotions can linger or stuck forever while physical acts happen only in the present then move on after.
“I don’t call that cheating, I call that disloyalty”
…that’s what cheating is no matter if it’s physical or emotional.
Thank you for saying that! Cheating is breaking your partner's trust and boundaries by being disloyal in any way.
It depends on the specifics. Physical is easy- you either willingly engaged in sexual physical contact with someone else or not- but emotional is very vague and could mean a lot of things. People can only control their physical actions, not their thoughts and emotions
@@music0cool Yes that's true emotions are hard to control. But when you are in a committed relationship, and then go talk to someone else and get that same level of intimacy, it becomes a problem. You must figure out who is the one you want to be loyal to, and then break up if it's the person you are just now catching feelings to. If you want to maintain your relationship, stay loyal to your ''original'' partner. I don't get what's so hard about this.
@@music0cool you can’t control your thoughts or emotions😭 that’s bs. It’s so much easier to talk to someone and open up then to do intercourse. Like you know how much work it is to get up and do that? Way easier to talk. So speak for yourself smoothbrain
Fr kind of a braindead statement
To everyone asking why people cheat: People are stupid sefish and want the best of both worlds. Its like you want someone else but you dont want to lose the safety net of your current partner. Everyone has their own personal reasons to cheat, but none of them are valid.
just insecure, immature fuckers that surely grew up getting whatever they want with no trouble
It's usually a power thing 👌
Perfect explanation
wow seems selfish
Exactly
I'm more surprised that the last girl got anyone to cheat with
stay woke brother anyone can cheat.
Some men have a fat fetish aka chubby chasers
Fr
Fr man💀
Even the ugliest girl on earth has dudes in her DM
"I wouldn't say that's cheating, that's just being disloyal."
That's... that's literally cheating.
Cheating is disloyal but disloyal is not always cheating
like rectangles and squared
I know, that’s one of the most stupidest comments I’ve heard. It’s like google the definition of cheating…you yourself just said it.
i was telling a friend about how a past lover cheated on me, and she suddenly got mad and exploded saying that cheating is ‘poly-phobic’ and ‘love isnt real, just have sex.’ and its just upsetting
that’s stupid. i’m poly and i can assure you you were not being “polyphobic”
@@iluvmybf0705 Poly has been accepted in the past and experimented with. It failed _terribly!_ So, it’s a fad once again which will end with much regret. One doesn’t need to be aware of much biology and psychology to know why such relationships are doomed. It’s all kind of funny really.
@@anhedonianepiphany5588 ok
Ex-friend* right?
Don’t be there friend lol
They never get normal people on this show lmao
I think these people are normal on the Streets of LA
Yeah exactly lol
@@Guus115 sad but true, thats the new normal
That's its whole purpose
This IS normal. We're the weird ones now.
I told my husband the first day we started dating that "If you ever cheat on me just break up with me, because Once I find out we are breaking up anyway."
Never been in a relationship but have always thought about doing that😭😭😭😭
Yea sucks that'd only stop someone like us not someone who would cheat
Damn girl ❤️ I agree to that!
I told my ex that I would rather he break up with me than to cheat. He still cheated on me and I hate his guts. People who cheat are selfish and don't care about their partners safety. They are the scum of the earth right next to murders.
How on earth do they find the most custom character skin looking npc's ever to put on this show
They walk outside in California and invite them in
@@thesenate4815 average california resident
@@thesenate4815 I live in California I have only met one person that kinda looked like the people in this video, and they were really nice.
@@StellarisIgnis oh shoot i didnt know you knew everyone in California, guess my point is moot :(
@@thesenate4815 You made a dumbass blanket statement about California. I called you on your bullshit.
as someone with a septum piercing, i promise the nose ring theory is only valid on CUT lmao
Lmfao same 🤣🤣🤣
Same lmao
Yes, tell em! 🙌🏾
Yep
yeah nah
Honestly thanks for that ending note, I was cheated on so hearing guys specifically not condoning it makes me feel a little bit of hope
Did you think all guys cheat?
@@Nicktheblasian No, I think it's more of a irrational fear tbh
@@szarwi fair enough. Its hard to trust after being cheated on, but dont be afraid. There’s trustworthy people out there, dont ignore the red flags and use your best judgment!
@@Nicktheblasian I'm trying, thank you! :D
I find it so strange that it has to be said that cheating is bad and should never be encouraged or allowed. I was raised to understand cheating was bad since I was a young boy, do people seriously have no sense of guilt or shame? I'm sorry for what you had to go through, I know being cheated on would mentally break me so I can't really blame you for having a form of irrational fear due to it, it's truly the epitome of breaking trust.
moral of the story is: If ur a cheater, just stay single, screw all u want just leave peoples hearts out of it ez
Thanks for the advise
They will start screwing other people's spouses/fiancees lol
is it really hard to say "hey I think we should see other people" to your partner?
apparently to a lot of people, yeah. cheaters can get mauled by a bear for all i care.
Yes
yes, it is, i wouldn’t be able to muster a word if it comes to that situation where i have to tell them that.
Yea some people r afraid of confrontation and they probably know that the other person wouldn’t agree and would just leave them but they don’t want to lose their partner so they just do it secretly
"Best of both worlds" even though hurting people is not ok.
People who cheat are just insecure and don’t see self worth in themselves. If they’re in a monogamous relationship they see their partner as a badge or a trophy. Once they get a trophy, they’ll try to claim more feeling that they can find some self worth in it all
I agree on this one, as someone who has done that, I had horrible self esteem issues, mostly because of my bf. Getting other guys made me feel good during an otherwise depressive period. Just decided to stay out of this whole relationship thing, so I can work on myself, respect the person I am with, and be respected too.
Just wanted to add. Polyamory ≠ an open relationship. Poly mostly means that instead of one monogamous partner you have multiple, most often 2 so cheating is just as plausible as in a monogamous. An Open relationship is the one you guys are thinking of. In an open relationship there's little to no boundaries so it's often not cheating (however it's still possible)
Yup, as a poly person I see it no different than a monogamous relationship, there’s just an extra person to be monogamous with
@•𝕸𝖎𝖉𝖓𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙☃️𝕲𝖔𝖙𝖍• As a mono af person, poly and mono are nothing alike. I’m sorry.. it just isn’t at all.
Exactly
@@lucifernazaedi that’s just how I see it
“Poly” _can_ work provided it’s akin to traditional polygamy. A harem of women type arrangement is practical when they’re all besotted with the same guy, but multiple guys sharing a woman is constantly in fail mode whether the participants are aware of it or not. Of course, people often override the realities with some internal fantasy. There’s very little incentive for _anyone_ to remain faithful these days, even amongst a supposedly committed huddle of freaks.
I only got one right, I guessed the last one correctly. She cheated. There’s no question about it. My theory about her is she seems like the type of person to want any sort of validation whatsoever. That means taking it whenever possible. She will take any affection she can possibly get because she probably doesn’t have a great sense of self. She’s probably depressed and maybe even suicidal. She has tattoos which could be used to cover up cuts. She has the colorful hair because she wants attention. She has clothes on that show the tiniest bit of skin because she wants attention but also hides a lot of her skin because she feels insecure. Depressed people looking for validation have a uniform, and she fits it to the T. I got the other 5 wrong, so maybe I don’t have a great sense of character in terms of cheating. But with her the signs are so strong that it’s hard to get it wrong.
LOW SELF ESTEEm is why people like myself are drawn towards toxicity. we feel we deserve to be punished. and so many people are like this. Its sad. but very true.
Yeah she does look like she has low self esteem.
I feel this way sorta
In what sense do you mean you feel you deserve to be punished? Like how does that apply to relationships? I’m not asking rhetorically I’m just trying to understand
Sounds like my ex ngl 💀 I'm not toxic, but he tried so hard to make me out to be
Nice try, but that’s a big “nope.” It’s really just down to the primitive female brain mistaking “toxic” behaviour for the dominant (“alpha”) traits that it reproductively desires. There’s no need to complicate things with pseudo-psychological attempts at self analysis.
Emotional cheating will eventually in some cases turn into physical cheating, then just cheating in general.
I have a nose ring and I’ve never cheated - NEVER WOULD! I’m tempted to take my ring out LOL
I don't have a nose ring bit my bf does, we r poly and we communicate about everything lol 😆
I do not have one yet, but I want to get one. If you like it & you think it looks good on you then you shouldn't take it out just because people have opinions that do not accurately represent who you are. Everything about anyone can be generalized in a negative way by somebody, but it does not define who you are. For example: "blondes are dumb" "brunettes are boring" "people with blue hair are crazy" Just because people stereotype that doesn't mean it is true to everybody with blue hair, for example.
Just don't go on CUT, you'll be fine ;P
Weird I've only been with one girl with a nose ring and she had a husband 🤣 was thinking the same as the boys
yeah, I have a septum too and I hate to say it but a lot of people make it look bad😭 like I think of crazy liberal when I think of septum
I'm loving these videos with Pegasus and Connor
:D
Correlation does not always equal causation it’s the first thing you learn in psychology😭
Not just psychology. You learn this everywhere
“I was paying close attention”
They were joking
At the end they say that correlation = causation and that he’s gonna argue with his maths teacher showing that he does know it’s not true and that it’s just a joke
Edit: actually it’s only Pegasus who says it, so it is possible Connor thought it was true and Pegasus said it as a joke
The joke flew way over you head 😂
I believe toxic men are some people's type because for some reason media loves to romanticize male trauma. When closed-off individuals open up about their messed up past it often creates a form of trauma bonding. "Oh he's not actually a bad person he's just had a bad upbringing." This causes women to sympathize with their abuser and feels relatively closer to him than they normally do with more well-adjusted partners. I fell victim to this in my teen years when my partner opened up to me about his abusive household which caused me to do the same. Even after his cheating, to this day, I'm still scared if he ever asked to get back together I'd most likely agree.
No this is so true. I used to read so much fanfiction, and almost all if not all of the men in them are so toxic
not just men tbh, many toxic women are seen as "girlbosses" that don't take shit from nobody while they're literally abusing their partner or anyone else . it's disgusting for both
@@bbew2914 onggg
you dont have self respect really
The pink haired girl's 'young and dumb' one time is likely the most common kind of cheating, aside from not communicating and thus not getting what you need in a relationship.
The last girl looks like the definition of a femcel stereotype 🤣🤣🤣
It's wild to me how many people don't know what emotional cheating is. No, it's not finding some random stranger cute and forgetting about them. No, it's not having a crush on someone else. It's what you do about those thoughts and feelings. It's your actions and words that moves it to emotional cheating.
Is having a random thought about someone you'll never see again going to affect your relationship if you don't talk about it or act on it? No, it won't. Now does that mean that having a crush on someone else while you're in relationship is okay? No, it's not okay but why? What's the difference? You don't forget a crush from one day to another and it's not just about physical attraction. That's someone you know or have interacted with at the very least but it is not a stranger you'll never see and think about again.
What's important is what you do with that crush. Will you take action in order to nip it in the bud or will you sit back or, worse, will you encourage it to grow?
1. Of course, nipping it in the bud is the right thing to do and the best way to avoid "accidently" (and I say "accidently" because some people don't realise it's a crush right away but once you are aware of any kinds of feelings towards someone else and do anything but nip it in the bud, that's where you make the conscious choice to not be respectful of your partner) cheat. The best way to kill a crush (not the person, of course, but the "more than friendly" feeling for that other person) is to reduce contact or fully cut contact.
2. The second choice which is to sit back and do nothing can really go either which is why it's not the most effective option but it is less extreme and easier. The crush could naturally die over time or it could grow stronger which will eventually make it more difficult to get rid of.
3. Last choice is to encourage the crush by hanging out or talking with them regurlarly. More one-on-one interactions, sharing intimate information, flirting, s3xting, anything that is more than friendly and that doesn't (wouldn't) sit right with your partner. All those actions are considered emotional cheating because you are investing emotionally with someone else.
For everyone who will say "but we can't control our feelings", you can't necessarily prevent the apparition of a crush but you absolutely can control what you do about it (see above) and if you think it's too hard to actually nip the crush in the bud, maybe you should simply consider leaving your partner. If you consciously choose to keep the other person, you are actively NOT choosing your partner and that should tell you something. No, cutting a friend off isn't easy but if you find yourself in that situation, you'll eventually have to choose unless your partner finds out and decides to choose themselves. What's easier? Choosing between a friend that you have a small crush on and the partner you claim you love or choosing between a friend that you have a huge crush on and the partner you claim to love? The earlier you choose, the easier it will be and the higher the possibility of you being able to go back to being just friend with the other person. (Another example why it's harder to be friends with ex-partners because the feelings were once so strong, they can tend to come back more easily)
Emotional cheating can lead to physical cheating and vice-versa. Either way, you are being disloyal to your partner while breaking their trust and boundaries and that's what cheating is. Both can and will leave a scar on the partner. It doesn't matter if you think that one or the other is worse because they are both horrible.
I think preferring toxic types is just a fetish.
A ‘cognitive deficit’ would be more accurate, or an illness.
It is, I think
Or/and trauma
Oh my god, I didn’t know there was a Female Redditor mod who’s part time job is a Discord mod
Cheaters just want BOTH that’s why they don’t say anything or break up
So the reason they keep asking about poly relationships is that they would know if one person isn't "enough" for them. People often discover that one person isn't enough for them by previously cheating on people, probably every single time. Poly is a last resort arrangement for a cheater. (Just my observation as a romance-loving, married monogamous woman who has never cheated or been cheated on before in her life. But I *have* seen how other relationships work.)
@@LessPegasus I know too much because I was the friend that everyone came to for relationship advice, even though they'd disregard and ignore that advice again and again. 🤣 I know about all the skeletons in my friends' closets. I don't judge, but what I've seen has brought me to some fairly solid and reliable conclusions about the psychology of cheaters and people who are open to poly relationships.
Polyamory isn't always a last resort for a cheater. Several of my friends are in poly relationships either to try it out because they're curious, they don't have a preference towards monogamy or polyamory, or because they just knew that one person wouldn't be enough. I don't think any of these individuals have ever cheated
Poly is not a last resort arrangement for a cheater. People who are in/have been in (a) poly relationship(s) are still able to partake happily & loyally in a monog relationship. Poly is not correlative to a cheater or to someone who is likely to cheat. It is instead an agreement that the partners in the relationship have feelings for more than one person at that given time & are communicative of that.
@@HolleWatkins It seems like someone has done much mental gymnastics to convince themselves that certain lies are truths. You should sell used cars!
@@HolleWatkins You're totally right. It's sad that the other people here don't get it.
Damn imagine cheating when you don't even have a neck
She's cheated so much that even her breasts are trying to get away.
😆
LMAOOO
There are 3 kind of cheaters:
Self discovery, generally young people that don't know what they want.
Thrill seekers, like doing dangerous things, would leave the door open just for the thrill
Emotional people, the smart ones will never be caught because they're sociopaths, the dumb ones are the ones who got caught
Where do they find these walking stereotypes?
17 first kiss? that person definetly looks like a pure soul to me
People can cheat in poly relationship depending on how they define their boundaries. Poly doesn't equal open relationship.
You could for example have a closed off throuple (3 people dating each other) or one person who dates multiple people but one to all partners only date that one partner etc etc. It comes in incredibly many forms a lot of which leave room for cheating but yeah statistically it would still be less likely.
I'm not poly so if I made a mistake feel free to correct me. I do appreciate that you kinda fought the stigma of poly = cheating!
I don’t know how she allows herself to walk out the door in the morning looking like that…. Where is her respect for herself?
I know, and if you're already overweight I don't see why you would make yourself worse
"I wouldn't call that cheating, I'd call that disloyal...."
So cheating isn't disloyal?
I know the "Pansexual Serial Monogamist" breaks people's brains but it's a thing. Pansexual is a sexuality identity, being Monogamous generally reflects your moral perspective. It doesn't make you any more likely to cheat than someone who is straight.
I’ve never met (in person) an attractive person in a polyamorous relationship or a cheater. Obviously I’ve ever met everyone, but in my personal experience none of them have been attractive.
never understood cheating just ask for an open relationship or break up with the person its rly not hard
Open relationships are gross and foolish
@@amandak.4246 communicating ur desires before acting on them is the only way to build meaningful connections. if uve developed feelings for some1 outside of the relationship yes that sucks for ur partner but being upfront and asking for an open relationship atleast gives ur partner the option to walk away. by acting without first asking thats what breaks the trust
@@daddytm7786 nothing gross with knowing what u desire from a relationship
Loving the collabs keep goin lads
The polyamorous people are probably less likely to cheat now, but more likely to have cheated in the past
Nose piercing and hair dye here. Cheated once sorta. I tried leaving the relationship and he said he would ruin my life if I left him so I emotionally "cheated" with another guy who eventually helped me out of the situation. It was romantic via text, no pics or anything. So technically I emotionally cheated but it was the best thing for me.
Emotional cheating is like weed , the gateway to cheating
I'm just gonna put this out here, might be wrong. But I think pegasus is confusing open relationships as polygamous. There is a difference
Open relationships= sleeping with others outside the person your dating with your partners consent
Polygamous= dating more than one person with both of your partners being aware of one another and allowing you to date the other with no cheating.
You just explained the exact same thing
@@ArcadiasPlanet poly is dating more than one person, open is just dating one. Read
cheating still exists in poly relationships. i’m open table poly for instance. everyone has separate parameters regarding loyalty but what boundaries you put in place to uphold that really counts. there’s never a valid reason for anyone to cheat
Been cheated on and the reason why they cheat is their insecurities and never blame yourself it has nothing to do with you .
What do you think of a girl who keeps her bf insecure on reason and he Breaks not knowing what to think or feel anymore ?
@@AlexanderLarkovsky-tg5to from hat i could understand from that comment your most likely describing and abuser they bring you down to have more control over you
@@AlexanderLarkovsky-tg5to if ur in a relationaship like that leave dip that shit ain't worth it
This content with connor is amazing, it adds a lot of spice to the video I love it keep it up
Cheating hurts, real bad if you actually are in love. Even text’s , just normal talking or a simple heart wont hurt anyone but if you say you want to do sexual things with the other one and flirt alot , it is 100% cheating, at least it will feel like it for the not-cheating one
Emotional cheating is a thing yet let me explain something:
You can feel infatuation for someone while in a relationship, yet VERBALLY acting out on that is cheating.
Emotional cheating is actively acting upon your emotions for another. Like If I had a crush on a friend while in my current relationship and told that individual sweet nothings....that's cheating. If I decide not to go after my emotions, like a logical individual, let the infatuation die out, that isn't cheating. Having feelings isn't cheating, acting upon them is cheating.
Edit: realized I forgot too add that daydreaming about another individual is considered acting upon your feelings.
Also some people are apparently way to dumb to comprehend the differences between love, lust, and infatuation. If you're one of THOSE idiots I recommend you look up what they mean before commenting. Don't call people babes, that's as cringey as your lack of intelligence.
Yes babes switching your feelings to someone else IS cheating even if you havent done anything else yet 💀 stop looking for copouts, if a person no longer loves the current SO they should break up period.
@@chronicmelancholic so catching feelings which is OUT of your control is cheating not the action of acting on them is what you're saying? I've had crushes on people while dating yet they went a way very quickly and I never acted on them (I usually then get dumped not really related but yeah) so I'm a cheater ? Is that what you're saying everyone that has had a crush (including celebrity crushes that will NEVER EVER HAPPEN) ever while in a relationship is cheating do you hear yourself? Also you have to catch the feelings before you leave the relationship so by your logic it doesn't even matter at that point you are already a cheater my brain cells actually committed unalive trying to comprehend your stupidity you have actually made me dumber and I implore you to shut up before you make the entire human race dumber
Absolutely agree. It's the acting upon feelings that is cheating whether verbally or physically. We can't control our emotion per say but we definitely can control if and how we act on them. If you're in a relationship but start to have a crush on a friend, you should reduce or cut contact with that person until the feelings have died off. You can't help feelings from arising but you can definitely nip the in the bud to avoid the slippery slope. That's also why when your partner feels uncomfortable with someone you know and asks you to not talk to them anymore that you respect their request (assuming this is a healthy, sane, stable and not controlling partner making that request)
@@chronicmelancholic infatuation is different than love. You're an idiot lol and I'm not justifying my behavior because I've never cheated nor had feeling for anyone other than my man. I'm explaining the differences. If you feel so inclined to attack me, go for it. I'm explaining. Infatuation dies within weeks. The issue is people like you cannot comprehend the differences between Love, lust, and infatuation.
What would burnt orange look like? I can only picture a half scorched citrus fruit
Kinda looks like rust. It's not too bad of a color, it just sounds weird.
I think some ppl cheat cuz they get off to the excitement of doin smthn behind another's back, while others are too much of a coward to just be honest. Or maybe they get bored of the relationship and decide to cheat to spice things up but they wanna stay with the partner cuz they provide smthn for em. Or maybe the partner is reallly toxic and they cheat cuz they afraid sayin smthn will get em hurt or smthn idk.
Corner was doing the woman ☕ all the time lol.
this is making me have second thoughts about getting a nose ring😭
I, a person who never been in a releationship, guessed every cheater correctly. Praise me, and of course praise the sun!
As a poly person, I can say it's definitely possible to cheat in a poly relationship (since each relationship still has rules + boundaries, even if they're as minimal as, "IDC who you shag, just don't do it in _our_ bed, okay?" or, "No barebacking with other ppl"), you just have to work harder to do it & it feels like even more of a betrayal bc of that.
A person that talks a lot and overshares is almost always needy, therefore they most likely would be a cheater if let's say their girlfriend or boyfriend isn't talking to them or listening to them which would make them feel in loved which would make them cheat. Right when she said she might talk too much I immediately thought cheater. Possibly has a personality disorder.
Yeah true
Jesus Christ you just perfectly described my ex-friend who cheated on like 7 people at once
communiacte or break up not that hard
Far right: *Walks up*
Pegasus: cheater!!
Everyone jokingly: Pegasus getting canceled for being "fatphobic"? 😱
The real reason: 👃
you can still cheat in a poly relationship. (im not poly at all but i have been told this by polys)
Yes this is true
These cut and jubilee people be giving us nose ring people bad rap. It's like the modern day trench coat and fedora situation.
When I sawthe girl I thought "how do you cheat or get cheated on if you don't have anyone to cheat on or have anyone that could cheat on you"
Cheaters are disgusting and there is no excuse for doing it
Monogamy isn't really a culture, it's human nature.
Edit: there is 0 masculine energy there, and i don't mean you two i mean the video.
LMAO love the part " I'm mad!!" Lol
You two should make a what would u rather vid, I'd be funny to watch wether u agree or not
Emotional cheating is cheating. Hiding things from your partner is cheating.
As a nosering girl with coloured hair, I havent cheated ever. I have been cheated on and I would never do that to another person. Cheaters deserve jail no cap
Me with two nose piercings 👁️👄👁️
Being attracted to toxic men: childhood trauma, my experience with it has been that im used to a chaotic household so I find comfort in chaotic relationships. Healthy relationships are uncomfortable and boring, super outside the norm so they feel like theyre not meant for you and that youre not deserving of them anyway.
The reason they ask about the Poly is because the majority of people in poly would cheat in a monogamous relationship. They are non-committal people who are just there for the sex and often come from traumatic experiences or severe loneliness. A majority of the people I have asked about their personal poly relationships and most of them have severe relationship trauma.
So, when it comes to relationships, please commit or quit. Sex is a bonding experience that really hits hard. If you make it generic, you passively become more and more depressed.
I love watching u guys react together! So funny! 😂💖
Emotional cheating isnt talking sexually it’s more sharingg personal issues and talking with someone else instead of ur partner all the time
I may have misunderstood this comment but that just sounds like friendship to me. Isn't it normal to talk about personal issues with your friends? Especially best friends.
Do you not confide in friends or something?
Lol I'm just explaining emotional cheating 😂
@@LilKay9 emotional cheating = DATING SOMEONE ELSE
Just to help into more detail emotional cheating is not mostly sexually based. It's when you have romantic feelings for another individual and as such you put more time into your relationship with them as opposed to your current partner. If you feel more romantically attached to your friends and homies and act as such it's emotional cheating. Also if you think when your partner ever leaves you they'll be the first one you'll date next you're emotionally cheating, because you have already been mentally checked out of your current relationship.
That gay guy was pretty funny with some of the jokes 😂” I joined in”
Women might want a “toxic relationship” for the same reason as wanting the “bad boy.” They’re attracted to certain personality traits called the “Dark Triad”, and mistake that for confidence, and competence.
i love how the two reacting aren't arguing about poly relationships and cheating in them, they're so respectful about each others opinions
As a polyamorus person, keep in mind that the key is consent. If you are with someone but you also want to see other people, if your partner is not comfortable with it, DO NOT SEE OTHER PEOPLE. If your partner seems hesitant but reluctantly says yes, I'd say it's safer to not see other people. Have a conversation about it. Do not try to convince them they should let you. If they say no, it means no. Simple as that.
I like how the first person just tried to justify cheating all because she didn’t have her needs… 😑
The nose ring theory can further be elaborated on in Negative XP’s song, “Scott Pilgrim Vs The World Ruined a Whole Generation of Women”.
At this point why have partners?
Earliest I’ve made it to a video.. 28 seconds!
wierd way to way second but ok
In all my life I’m glad I can say I’ve never betrayed anybody close to me. And that’s more than those cheaters can ever say. If you cheat, you’re heinous.
why does the chick from the thumbnail look like mac and cheese if it was a person
In my head, polyamory is cheating that sounds better.
Pegasus has facts and logic, Connor has a gut instinct, nose rings = L
rethinking whether i wanna get that nose ring ive been wanting now lol
Most people cheat because they have the opportunity to do so. Don't commit to someone if you want to sleep around, just be upfront with your intentions.
These people piss me off so much. The people in the video, not Pegasus and his guest.
i have a crush on Connor ….
I see Pegasus is sticking to the "locking his room to watch SpongeBob" excuse in case his mom watches 😂
But we also have to remember that for every cheater there are probably two cheaters who have twisted the story enough to convince themselves that they’re not a cheater.
Relationships are soo complicated ☹
They really aren't. Some people are just selfish and choose not to be faithful:/
Hey now, I have a nose ring among other piercings and have never cheated lol.
#notallnoserings 🤣
Thank you Pegasus, thanks to you I now know that correlation ALWAYS means causation; with this information I can now be free to truly succeed in life!
Pink hair girl doing her best princess Carolyn impression from bojack horseman
I will never look at someone with colored hair and a nose ring the same way again...
Cheating omen ☕, cus cheaters don't deserve the dub.
I’ve been w my partner almost 2 months and we’d been friends for 5 of them. I really can’t imagine ever cheating on him or him doing the same to me. It breaks my heart a little, because I understand some people do but I can’t fathom why. It seems like a preventable issue-communicate before you cheat w/ someone else.
One of my now-exs in college tried to convince me to get a side-shave and a septum piercing. I've now realized they wanted to destroy me. 😳😅
the “toxic men are my type” is just women ☕️
Yeah nooo
@@ultraboombean actually yeah
Not all
@@hxnniebxn5342 okay
Women ☕️😂