Indeed, this has often led to me sabotaging myself, perhaps on a more subconscious level. Once I realised this, it did pop in my mind when I was tempted to relapse.
I know that on many, many occasions I have conned myself after years of sobriety that having a drink will be different this time. This con has never ended well. All it takes is one and that will be me until I can not drink anymore. That means six weeks to 2 months 24/7 drinking until my body can not cope and I start getting sick. No choice now I have to sober up. Jobs have been lost and relationships tossed into oblivion. I must never believe this con again. The con can arise in any moment happy, sad or indifferent.
I'm exactly the same way: one single drink when I've convinced myself I'm safe to do it always leads to weeks of misery. I can't afford to do it at all anymore.
To me, it's a "con" because I think of booze as a "comfort" when it's nothing but Uncomfortable afterwards It keeps me from getting anything important completed, it's a temporary escape My worst day and a half I drank three bottles of champagne and didn't get anything done; when I woke up I wasn't even sure what day of the week it was. What a failure and what a foolish tirade; I have three levels in my house and could have fallen and nobody would have known How shameful
After 25 years alcohol free my brain still tells me "I need a drink !?" 😂.... best of luck to those struggling.Alcohol related issues kill ☠️ MORE Americans than the current opioid crisis !.No one seems outraged about that fact.!?.
As for me (19 years sober), I don't think about having a drink anymore. Why do I view Bat Country? I do it because I appreciate his philosophic take of what it means to be an alcoholic. (I dislike the term Alcohol Use Disorder. Seems like people in white coats in a laboratory). But I am a recovering prescription drug addict. I've been clean for almost 11 years now. Xanax has entered my mind and soul. Just one more Xanax bar. Won't be that bad. Just one more...
You might want to consider the fact that you relate to the chaotic, broken people of the world because that’s how you see yourself broken and chaotic. I don’t know what your family life was like, but craving drama and chaos is your motivating factor. Despair and sadness.
@@kd9692 so sorry to hear this now you know it. It’s time to let it go I too had a traumatic childhood The things that helped me were looking at my perpetrators as just being humans.. Forgive them doesn’t mean let whoever hurt you back into your life then after that forgive yourself it’s the only way to live. Chaos and drama will destroy you with all the stress and constant influx. Let it all go. You only have one life live it.
Day 144 free from alcohol, week three of being in the fellowship & now have my temporary sponsor. I choose each day to not pick up and when my head is loud I seek support. Early days lots of work to do, this is a blessing being in recovery.
The reason i relapse is because everything is going well and i think one can of weak lager can't harm me. I fool myself that i can be that responsible drinker. It creeps up on me and before i know it I'm back on the hard stuff. I need a tatoo on my forehead that says" Abstinence is your life now". Your videos are a great help.
Thanks CJ! That tattoo sounds like a good idea. Actually I toyed with the idea of getting the word "no" tattooed on my index finger so I'd see it every time I had a glass in my hand, but decided not to go through with it.
I'm an alcoholic who deals with the same issue and I've worked a program, AA before and I believe that the higher power part, really does the job for me. But like the drinking, I know it's bad but I don't except with recovery and higher power I do the opposite, I don't do it... :(
Alcoholism is a cunning, baffling, and powerful disease. The topic of my Friday meeting this week was about how we can stay even keeled in sobriety because while extreme anguish can lead us to drink its actually just as common for us to drink when experiencing extreme ups and great successes. It's so hard to stay in the middle lane, especially for addicts. I could never do this without the support & advice from the fellowship. One of the most important things I've learned is to stop listening to that diseased part of my brain. It's lying to me all the time, and it'll play the most convoluted cons to get me back to the bottle. So grateful that I'm sober today and by the grace of God I hope to have many more like it.
Thanks for this mate. I was listening to a New York detective talk the other day. He'd been sober over a decade when 9/11 happened. He said in the midst of the carnage, a local bar opened its doors and put tables out with free water. He said when he went to get one, he looked in the bar and had an urge to slip behind the counter and help himself to the whiskey. Not because of the drama and horror of the day, but because no one would notice. Cunning, baffling, and powerful indeed.
I feel like some of us drink because we go through these episodes. It's such a an issue in the community that, the extreme ups as well as downs have to be common.
Presumably not every alcoholic started out drinking to oblivion. There was an on-ramping early period in which the alcoholic could drink relatively normally. So the brain remembers that time as if it were still behaviourally possible now and tricks you into starting drinking 'responsibly' again.
Huge fan of the videos. When I first started AA I found it difficult to relate to others because their drinking patterns were different than my own. (Not to discredit their experiences and suffering of course) It's a great help to see content and information that's so relevant to this form of drinking.
I went to a funeral today. My grandmother's. There was money behind the bar. Its a recipe for disaster for someone like us. Id like to say I fought heroically against the urge, but i didnt. I drank, heavily. I drank so much that I have a blank in my memory and I remember very little besides being in my bed now. It's an uncomfortable, scary feeling. "Did i make a fool of myself? What did i say? What didnt i say? Was i disrespectful to this person, do they hate me now?" And it goes on and on. Thank you so much for your videos.
You may not be a medical doctor or an addiction counselor, but you have real life experiences that makes all the difference. Something, no matter how much schooling you have, which is irreplaceable.
Great channel, I'm 6 months sober now and I just feel amazing in every way. There have been moments, well one beer wont hurt but then I remind myself that I will end up in total anxiety and panicking that I cannot stop since delirium tremens are waiting for me.
As a recovering heroin addict of over 11 years (clean since 2015), I would add that severe opiate withdrawal is also the worst feeling the human body is capable of experiencing. Equal to severe alcohol withdrawal but in a different way. Living hell in the most literal way.
Currently ending my first week in hospital due to another relapse and this makes so much sense. Hated AA (although fair play if others find help through it). It felt like the grief Olympics. Too many people swapping old "war stories" then going straight to the pub down the road. Bloody hard not to join in. As well meaning as friends and relatives are it can be painful to nod along to spurious advice. This honest, balanced piece of lived experience is wonderful. Not out of the woods yet but getting there. On a lighter note, I now have a pair of eyes in a rather fetching shade of piss yellow😊. Thanks very much and the best of luck on your journey.
Oh James that thing about friends and rellies giving bad advice - that's so funny, I could do a video just about that alone. Hope you're doing good today mate. Stick at it, keep chipping away, one day at a time and ll that stuff.
My relapses are always when things are going well or getting better... Not when I'm low. Been trying to find someone else who experienced this dynamic. Most people assume people binge to drown their sorrows, I drink to drown any possibility of success. If I'm feeling good I will go into almost hysteria in anticipation of self sabotage albeit a subconscious phenomenon. I suspect I have a comorbid mental health condition such a bipolar or similar. Thanks for the video it helped a lot.
Yeah, success was a trigger for me. I'm getting better though. And yeah, you should see a specialist to check if there's some kind of treatable underlying condition.
@silverliningsplaylost you’re one of the first people I’ve heard say this, I’m much the same. I don’t drink frequently but I’d say I have some level of disordered drinking as I tend to intentionally make my life harder than it needs to be by building up to a particular event, like a work presentation, and then have some drinks the night before almost to prove to myself that I can succeed even when I’m impaired. I assume it’s some kind of insecurity at the centre of this. It’s quite bizarre
I think for me I know that one day this little game won’t go my way and I’ll lose something, an opportunity or I’ll fail at something and it’ll be my own stupid fault, so I’m taking a drinking break to see how my brain handles it
i think more than anything we need to remember why we started on our path to sobriety, and that we started on it for a reason. losing our way is a common occurrence, what matters is finding our way back and ASAP. it's much easier to stay the course than to begin again and again.
Watching due to people I know showing all sorts of behaviors that are rarely discussed on the internet around their drinking. So thankful I was never into heavy drinking. Now I'm zero carb and hardly drink at all. I appreciate your channel.
Those are all my reasons too. Very good to finally hear someone say them. Including the sober dating part and the fear of success. The only difference is that I am a non-drinking polydrug user.
8 days into a relapse right now and binge listening all your episodes based solely on your channel name and some of the episodes resonating at fever pitch. I started with you describing a binge. I was in. Am in.
Hey mate don’t know if you’ll read this but I found your videos and it’s actually so refreshing to hear an honest and raw outlook on alcoholism, I can relate a lot to your videos and it’s helped me stay sober for 50 ish days now, anyways just wanted to say I’ve found your videos very helpful and you’re doing an amazing job 🙏
Thanks for an honest and accurate look at the complexities of withdrawals and relapse. I’ve been in deep denial for decades but last week a daily diet of spirits by the litre forced my hand and I sought help via an ambulance to A&E. This was 3 days ago and the hard work begins.
@@_BatCountry Still dry and the gloom has cleared, I've had some guidance and support and all seems good, if a little boring. Thanks BC for the kindness. Hope you are well too.
I have just relapsed again, been through detox twice and was proud to be over 6 months AF! I’m ashamed and embarrassed, and I realise that it happens so quickly 😢
Ah nuts, sorry to hear that Jayne. While I know that relapse is part of the process, and I've been there myself, don't let that become an excuse for it to happen again. One day at a time, ya know?
@@_BatCountry thank you! I’ve managed to get some Diazepam from the GP which I will start tomorrow morning for a few days, I will get this crap out of my system again! 😍
I feel it's this weird momentum vibration within us. Our bodies are reactive energies. I feel us sensitives are different and more alluring to energies. Imo.
Self sabotage has been a recurring problem for me for long as I can remember,13 weeks sober from alcohol and weed and feeling generally very good so far, but just recently feeling slightly vulnerable to a slide especially on weekends.I think my pink cloud has dissipated somewhat but I do still fell determined not to start again.Thanks for your insights, your talks help a lot
Hang in there mate. The 3 month mark was a stumbling block for me a couple of times, so hang on until you're past that and assess how you're feeling then. Thanks for the comment!
It is horrible. I am right there with you, brother. Euphoric recall and the disease process and disconnect of frontal cortex from the midbrain is my answer.
Very intelligent and articulate man. I have in no way been through what you have, however struggling with addiction. You talk so much sense and have hit a few nerves. Wish you all the best and hope you keep things positive for yourself. Life is not easy for anyone.
You really touched on some very impactful issues in this video, especially regarding sex without alcohol. I remember the days long before the internet when people had very limited options far as meeting new people for either a fling or looking develop a relationship. Going to bars and using alcohol which to some more than others was a very necessary part of the experience, for a shy person like myself, one of the only options. Talking with someone behind a keyboard is much less stressful and it would have helped me immensely although it is hard to say how I would have handled it then if I had the option to meet over the internet. I would imagine meeting someone face to face for the first time after communicating over the internet is as nerve wracking or more thus increasing the desire to drink. Overall, the internet is still a healthier way to get to know someone at a safe distance than going to a bar.
Thank you for this great video and I can really relate to the "why?" question, similarly I can't get to the bottom of why I keep returning to the drink despite having experienced all the lows of it as well as the highs of sobriety. Irrational. Insane. I can't understand it so how can I expect my loved one's to understand. It's a conundrum for sure. Tam
@@_BatCountry A good, productive day, done weights as well - should be feeling endorphins, yet absolutely flat... At least I should sleep well tonight.
I recently discovered your channel and just want to express my appreciation for your work! I wish I’d had this in my life earlier, but I probably wouldn’t have been able to take in what you’re saying😅 big ups
I can relate to the fear of success - I know where I am and what I need to do when things aren't going my way. I work hard, gym, tidy, relax etc but when things are going well, god help me. We learn though (the hard way) and I'm aware of this now.
I'm exactly the same as you. I'm a gambler not with the horses or pools but with my life. I love chaos. My heroes are the outsiders, the artists like The Velvets, Bukowski, Lennon, the freedom fighters leading the revolution against the man. Im afraid of failure so I fail and When I'm succeeding I celebrate to the point where I can't get out of bed and collect my award. It's been a cycle of patterns that have led nowhere but to isolation so I dive into recording music at home trying to create my masterpiece that is magically going to make me rich and live a care free life of booze birds and drugs. But it only ever ends up with depression.
Thanks for a honest video. This is an insidious disease which tells you it's ok to do the thing you know is wrong, but convinces you is right. I've had 4 sober years, happy years, but that little voice, every once in a while whispers, 'go on, it'll be ok'. I've learned to push it aside, not to listen, to ignore it. All the pain and suffering is there, waiting for me if I drink. Today, I chose not to drink.
Great point was dating and that seems to be my achilies heal, I got sober as a single man for 2 years I let dating back in my life and struggled when in a sexual situation and relapsed as alcohol had always been there too relax the situation, I'm sure in time this will heal itself with the correct mindset but as you say it's mostly outside forces I have to address, a most informative video
It’s happened to me when stressed arise even though alcohol no longer even has a euphoric or even much sedative effect I think it’s the memory of previous ‘happy’ experiences pulling on your subconscious to get out of a stressful scenario
Absolutely. Each time I've gone back to drinking in the past five years or so, I've been disappointed with the effects. I can remember one time in 2021 I drank some bourbon after a day of skiing and that came close to the euphoria one drink should have. All other times it's really about getting to the point and hitting 4 or 5 off the bat because what is the point of 1 or 2? Then it's just chasing a better feeling that really never arrives... which can lead to other things unfortunately. When I get into a low mood and am lacking willpower, I'll do a mini meditation or thought experiment and experience the night of drinking from start to finish and when I arrive at the next morning and it's just me laying there feeling awful, I suddenly don't want to drink. It's so easy to forget where it ends.
Alcoholism is a self-destructive disease, it is pleasant in the beginnign but later on you become a slave, a beggar, and alcoholism is your absolute Master.
I can or could when I was young socialise only while drinking. Completely a different person. I seemed so confident it was unbelievable . So maybe the companionship of the pub draws some of us in.?
I think the reason I would go back to drinking after experiencing so much wreckage is that there were still a bit of relief and some rewards left in drinking. Once the rewards were gone for good, going back lost its hold on me. I drank the fun out of the bottle. Straight up. 😞
I feel like some people are more prone to DT's than others. I've been through some dangerous withdrawals and multiple alcohol seizures, but I've never been in a true state of delirium.
I have relapsed before when what I think is a sudden negative problem that bangs up - my fear instinct rises considerably and then I make the wrong decision to quell my anxiety. This has happened 3 times. So, now, I must learn to Think before Reacting. The devil is a crafty player. Im on day 2 of withdrawing and so I rise up and try again. Hopefully, with more wisdom.
Hi Cyn! Relapsing is hard, but I'm very happy to hear your determination to keep trying. It's horrible now, but it's worth it in the long run. Good luck, and keep us updated.
Some people attempt to withdraw from alcohol without medical assistance, if the case is really terrible of course you can die or remain mentally disturbed forever. Doctors can sedate you while the body goes through that terrible time but again I've never been there and my congratulations to you Bat Country for overcoming that monsters everyday.
Dont need an excuse to relapse. Good news, bad news, indifferent news, or just full on self pity. The path to event horizon self destruction flicks on like a 20 watt lightbulb. Pint after pint. Line after line. Where x meets y. Perpetual self harm. Guilt. Self worth. Doubt. The bermuda triangle of the addiction.
@@_BatCountry we do. it sickens me Stu. i'm flushing my life down the armitage shanks u bend. Again. i dont even enjoy drinking and snorting. it's a bore. it's a chore. yet here i am. again. risible.
For me it's not weird that when good things happen you want to drink. Basicly you are getting a chemical kick in your brain when things are going well, and then your brain is like "well you know how we could get an even bigger kick?"
In my last 15 years I went to hells dungeon many times over and over again I’d be drinking and drugging it to oblivion in 1 hour it’s mental then it would go on for weeks
So glad I beat my craving for alcohol. I replaced with cannabis and cannabis has me in therapy and is trying to get my life in order. Turned out I was using alcohol to treat my military PTSD. I went from 10 years of being a black out drunk, 6 to 12+ beers, to a gram or so of cannabis a day. I am with you, if I get too excited I get triggered as well. So I have to live in a very mild state, I can't get too sad or too happy. A promotion at work triggered me to 3 months in bed telling myself, "I am going to screw this up some how," and it became a self-fulfilling prophecy. So now I have to focus on the basics such as food, shelter, healthy pets, bills paid and the rest is just extra. Just a trip to Taco Bell for my free veteran meal is too much for me because I am fearful I am going to get triggered and yell at the poor person giving my my burrito or a customer just trying to enjoy their day. Alcohol was a mask I was using. I still have my issues but I am not blacked out drunk vomiting on everything and I have money in my pocket and I am glad for that.
I'm happy to hear your positive outlook on this stuff mate. I don't need to tell you that the way vets are treated is pretty shameful, and I hope you continue to move forward despite the obstacles.
So I seen a few of your videos now and ima sub and like. I’m a binge drinker. I’ll binge for 3-5 days and then stop for 6 months to a year. But each time I decide to drink it’s aways bad. At first I used to drink every day and a few years ago and I decided to slow down…. Which lead me to binge drinking temporarily and stoping but it’s good and bad. I’m trying to figure out what causes me to act in such a destructive way when I can stop this for long periods of time.
I just had almost 2 months & went out after high expectations of a potential love interest. Right after a bad breakup on June. I tried to get into another relationship only a month into sobriety.
Have you ever considered doing research into the current data on the biological and genetic factors that play into alcohol use disorder? It’s been well established that people can have a genetic predisposition to alcoholism and consequent relapse.
There is no rational answer to why people relapse even when they know how bad withdrawal can be. The decision to go back to drinking is not based on reason or logic. Addictions are not logical. The most effective method I have used to not go back to drinking is to write down the pros and cons of drinking again, the benefits and consequences. There may be 2 or 3 benefits and 15 negative consequences and I still sometimes go back. That is not deductible reasoning.
Because alcohol is an addictive substance. Once you get on Naltrexone and start the sinclair method, you will reach the point of extinction where you no longer care about alcohol. It's a beautiful thing.🎉
Just relapsed there. 2 weeks, but 99% sure I am done now. I didn’t not enjoy any of it. Like WTH. Got off quite easy re withdrawal. I did kind of taper a bit which I know BC doesn’t agree with. This is the 5th or 6th relapse since summer 2020. Best wishes to everyone x
Oh no, sorry to hear that. For what it's worth, it took me 5 or 6 serious relapses before sobriety really stuck. So get to work, it is well within your own power to control this thing.
Drank hard, real hard but even 3 to 5 bottles of wine a day for years wasn't enough to give me the DTs when i finally quit. I have a funny kind of 'respect' for the guys that can consume enough to be at risk of the DTs.
It wasn't until I watched a few BC videos that I realized I could've actually kicked it up a notch this entire time. Never had DT and I'm not sure if I could've gotten to that point. The worst was unstoppable cold sweats, no body temp regulation, inability to sleep, and absolute dread that I might be forced to interact with someone - about two days worth of it. My body tapped out and I don't think I could've physically drank any more.
First of all, the word relapse is very often used incorrectly. In my own case, I experienced countless vain attempts to quit drinking, sometimes with a little bit of what I thought was success. It might have been a few days, weeks, etc. When I drank again, it was because I never fully conceded to my innermost self that I was the "root problem"! THAT'S NOT a relapse. You can't relapse from something you were NEVER a part of!!! (RECOVERY) A relapse is when we have started to live in the solution, by changing our playgrounds, and playmates, and as a result of those changes, our lives start to get better. Then, the "ISM" tells me "It wasn't that bad", and one bad decision leads to another bad decision, which leads to the pitiful incomprehensible demoralization...AGAIN. THAT is a relapse! You've stopped doing the very thing you KNOW was making your life better. All the best...Mark 5/8/1994 ✌
yes its a dichotomy that goes round and round..i need some beer..that will make everything ok but then it doesnt..i have been caught in a liquid prison..and i forget where i put the keys.
What’s crazy is that somehow covid caused brain inflammation for me for close to a year. I was not the same person. It felt exactly like when I had a severe concussion when I was younger. Started having anger outbursts and extreme addictive behavior that I never experienced ever. I ended up basically daily for a year. 10-15 drinks everyday. Sometimes even more. I never left the house either because somehow the brain inflammation caused me to develop panic attacks. Alcohol probably didn’t help with my brain health and made matters worse. It was scary and very unlike my normal self to drink that much. I was a social drinker before and would go out with friends on a Friday or Saturday and have a few drinks but never touched it during the week. It was like in a 24 hour period I became a reckless person. Not caring about the consequence of getting obliterated and not being able to function. Or the fact that my family was extremely concerned
As for the government paying for therapy.....Medi-Cal absolutely pays for SUD treatment and therapy. Clients get free treatment and therapy through Medi-Cal and the client can relapse and enroll again and again and again and it's absolutely free. I live in California so only speaking for my state.
Some people are so much more comfortable with the suffering that their is a huge part of them that the feeling unwanted and having no respect from anyone is ingrained because of a lack of self esteem because sometimes when they start doing well they can't accept themselves as anything other than the quivering wreck in the corner whose destroyed everything again and compliments and well dones feel like evil lies from people who only weeks before despised them ,it's not their faults it's the drinks way back in and needs a complete rewiring of the soul and a long period of sobriety to convince the alcoholic that they have anything other than a piece of s..t. A very sad lonely disease that isn't just content with killing people but wants to send them to the grave completely destroyed and alone .
If I may suggest something, don't overestimate your head injury, it may smoetimes at least be a part of how you justify relapses to yourself. While it may be detrimental to same degree, obviously you do have control not to take the first drink.
So then you would be self sabotaging kind of like I’m gonna break up with you before you break up with me. And your mind you feel like it’s inevitable so being a control freak which you are, but you just don’t know it yet you’re gonna be the one that controls whether or not you drink again or you don’t drink again whether or not you’re successful or you’re not at the end of the dayyou don’t have fear of success you want to self sabotage yourself by relapsing so you’ll never know and you can blame the relapse. You have a fear of failure, not of success.
Ah yes the alcohol to anarchosocialism pipeline Commonly mistaken for the “vodka to revolutionary vanguardism pipeline” and the “bourbon to revolutionary jacobin republicanism” pipeline.
@@_BatCountry you won’t know how much it will help you until you try it. I’m not telling you to do it to get high or have a great time. It creates retrospection into your life as to why you do things. It’s an ancient medicine I think people relapse because they have no idea why they drink in the first place. I wish you nothing but success and I hope you stay sober and figure out what you’re driving factor is. Get to the root of the problem you’re worth it.
@@jeanieologist4456 thanks for this, I've been searching for the reason why I keep going back to drink for at least 15 years, even after years of sobriety and knowing all about the pain and trouble that awaits me, I return to booze like a moth to the flame. I've tried all sorts to find out why without success, including AA, but maybe the mushrooms can help me find the reason.
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That last point about fear of success definately resonates
I'm glad you can relate.
Indeed, this has often led to me sabotaging myself, perhaps on a more subconscious level. Once I realised this, it did pop in my mind when I was tempted to relapse.
I know that on many, many occasions I have conned myself after years of sobriety that having a drink will be different this time. This con has never ended well. All it takes is one and that will be me until I can not drink anymore. That means six weeks to 2 months 24/7 drinking until my body can not cope and I start getting sick. No choice now I have to sober up. Jobs have been lost and relationships tossed into oblivion. I must never believe this con again. The con can arise in any moment happy, sad or indifferent.
I'm exactly the same way: one single drink when I've convinced myself I'm safe to do it always leads to weeks of misery. I can't afford to do it at all anymore.
To me, it's a "con" because I think of booze as a "comfort" when it's nothing but Uncomfortable afterwards It keeps me from getting anything important completed, it's a temporary escape My worst day and a half I drank three bottles of champagne and didn't get anything done; when I woke up I wasn't even sure what day of the week it was. What a failure and what a foolish tirade; I have three levels in my house and could have fallen and nobody would have known How shameful
After 25 years alcohol free my brain still tells me "I need a drink !?" 😂.... best of luck to those struggling.Alcohol related issues kill ☠️ MORE Americans than the current opioid crisis !.No one seems outraged about that fact.!?.
As for me (19 years sober), I don't think about having a drink anymore. Why do I view Bat Country? I do it because I appreciate his philosophic take of what it means to be an alcoholic. (I dislike the term Alcohol Use Disorder. Seems like people in white coats in a laboratory). But I am a recovering prescription drug addict. I've been clean for almost 11 years now. Xanax has entered my mind and soul. Just one more Xanax bar. Won't be that bad. Just one more...
@@stanleycostello9610 WOW !...I seldom hear of people being alcohol free for so long...amazing to me ! Really...it is absolutely possible !
The mind seems to forget how shit we feel when coming off it .
Yeah. It's like when you break a bone. Months later you remember that it hurt, but you can't remember what the pain actually felt like.
There are ways to mitigate.. when im coming off a bender I'll try stay dry all days and few beers and some weed at night for sleep
You might want to consider the fact that you relate to the chaotic, broken people of the world because that’s how you see yourself broken and chaotic. I don’t know what your family life was like, but craving drama and chaos is your motivating factor. Despair and sadness.
You're probably right.
@@kd9692 so sorry to hear this now you know it. It’s time to let it go I too had a traumatic childhood The things that helped me were looking at my perpetrators as just being humans.. Forgive them doesn’t mean let whoever hurt you back into your life then after that forgive yourself it’s the only way to live. Chaos and drama will destroy you with all the stress and constant influx. Let it all go. You only have one life live it.
I don’t drink but come here to understand both my parents were alcoholics they are both gone
😮
Day 144 free from alcohol, week three of being in the fellowship & now have my temporary sponsor. I choose each day to not pick up and when my head is loud I seek support. Early days lots of work to do, this is a blessing being in recovery.
Congrats on your sober time mate! Keep us posted on your progress.
The reason i relapse is because everything is going well and i think one can of weak lager can't harm me. I fool myself that i can be that responsible drinker. It creeps up on me and before i know it I'm back on the hard stuff. I need a tatoo on my forehead that says" Abstinence is your life now". Your videos are a great help.
Thanks CJ! That tattoo sounds like a good idea. Actually I toyed with the idea of getting the word "no" tattooed on my index finger so I'd see it every time I had a glass in my hand, but decided not to go through with it.
Boredom, loneness and emptiness always leads me to relapse
Same
Yup. Being alone and not enjoying that, l feel it's the hardest to quit.
@@oasisbeyond Me too big time
I'm an alcoholic who deals with the same issue and I've worked a program, AA before and I believe that the higher power part, really does the job for me. But like the drinking, I know it's bad but I don't except with recovery and higher power I do the opposite, I don't do it... :(
Alcoholism is a cunning, baffling, and powerful disease. The topic of my Friday meeting this week was about how we can stay even keeled in sobriety because while extreme anguish can lead us to drink its actually just as common for us to drink when experiencing extreme ups and great successes. It's so hard to stay in the middle lane, especially for addicts. I could never do this without the support & advice from the fellowship. One of the most important things I've learned is to stop listening to that diseased part of my brain. It's lying to me all the time, and it'll play the most convoluted cons to get me back to the bottle. So grateful that I'm sober today and by the grace of God I hope to have many more like it.
Thanks for this mate. I was listening to a New York detective talk the other day. He'd been sober over a decade when 9/11 happened. He said in the midst of the carnage, a local bar opened its doors and put tables out with free water. He said when he went to get one, he looked in the bar and had an urge to slip behind the counter and help himself to the whiskey. Not because of the drama and horror of the day, but because no one would notice. Cunning, baffling, and powerful indeed.
I feel like some of us drink because we go through these episodes. It's such a an issue in the community that, the extreme ups as well as downs have to be common.
Presumably not every alcoholic started out drinking to oblivion. There was an on-ramping early period in which the alcoholic could drink relatively normally. So the brain remembers that time as if it were still behaviourally possible now and tricks you into starting drinking 'responsibly' again.
Huge fan of the videos. When I first started AA I found it difficult to relate to others because their drinking patterns were different than my own. (Not to discredit their experiences and suffering of course) It's a great help to see content and information that's so relevant to this form of drinking.
Thanks Dan! I had the same experience with the groups, that's partly what led me to start doing these videos myself.
“The fear of success”. Yes, that’s when I had my relapses too. I feel understood in your video. 🙏
Thanks for your comment, I'm glad it resonated.
That’s a big one!
I went to a funeral today. My grandmother's. There was money behind the bar. Its a recipe for disaster for someone like us. Id like to say I fought heroically against the urge, but i didnt. I drank, heavily. I drank so much that I have a blank in my memory and I remember very little besides being in my bed now. It's an uncomfortable, scary feeling. "Did i make a fool of myself? What did i say? What didnt i say? Was i disrespectful to this person, do they hate me now?" And it goes on and on. Thank you so much for your videos.
Thanks Harry, and sorry for your loss. I hope you're not being too hard on yourself now and that things improve.
I feel ya, sweetheart. Been there MANY times 😢
Thank you. This video saved me from a potential relapse today.
Loneliness, and no escape from myself.
We're here for you buddy.
You may not be a medical doctor or an addiction counselor, but you have real life experiences that makes all the difference. Something, no matter how much schooling you have, which is irreplaceable.
He’s more in touch, thoughtful, and articulate than most addiction counsellors, at least in my experience. Glad I found his channel!
Great channel, I'm 6 months sober now and I just feel amazing in every way. There have been moments, well one beer wont hurt but then I remind myself that I will end up in total anxiety and panicking that I cannot stop since delirium tremens are waiting for me.
Huge congratulations on your sober time. Thanks for the comment, and for the positivity!
As a recovering heroin addict of over 11 years (clean since 2015), I would add that severe opiate withdrawal is also the worst feeling the human body is capable of experiencing. Equal to severe alcohol withdrawal but in a different way. Living hell in the most literal way.
Yeah there's a lot of overlap in the experiences. Congratulations on your clean time, long may it continue.
Depression has a big part.
Spot on. Thank for sharing.
Currently ending my first week in hospital due to another relapse and this makes so much sense. Hated AA (although fair play if others find help through it). It felt like the grief Olympics. Too many people swapping old "war stories" then going straight to the pub down the road. Bloody hard not to join in. As well meaning as friends and relatives are it can be painful to nod along to spurious advice. This honest, balanced piece of lived experience is wonderful. Not out of the woods yet but getting there. On a lighter note, I now have a pair of eyes in a rather fetching shade of piss yellow😊. Thanks very much and the best of luck on your journey.
Oh James that thing about friends and rellies giving bad advice - that's so funny, I could do a video just about that alone.
Hope you're doing good today mate. Stick at it, keep chipping away, one day at a time and ll that stuff.
My relapses are always when things are going well or getting better... Not when I'm low. Been trying to find someone else who experienced this dynamic. Most people assume people binge to drown their sorrows, I drink to drown any possibility of success. If I'm feeling good I will go into almost hysteria in anticipation of self sabotage albeit a subconscious phenomenon.
I suspect I have a comorbid mental health condition such a bipolar or similar.
Thanks for the video it helped a lot.
Yeah, success was a trigger for me. I'm getting better though. And yeah, you should see a specialist to check if there's some kind of treatable underlying condition.
@silverliningsplaylost you’re one of the first people I’ve heard say this, I’m much the same. I don’t drink frequently but I’d say I have some level of disordered drinking as I tend to intentionally make my life harder than it needs to be by building up to a particular event, like a work presentation, and then have some drinks the night before almost to prove to myself that I can succeed even when I’m impaired. I assume it’s some kind of insecurity at the centre of this. It’s quite bizarre
I think for me I know that one day this little game won’t go my way and I’ll lose something, an opportunity or I’ll fail at something and it’ll be my own stupid fault, so I’m taking a drinking break to see how my brain handles it
i think more than anything we need to remember why we started on our path to sobriety, and that we started on it for a reason. losing our way is a common occurrence, what matters is finding our way back and ASAP. it's much easier to stay the course than to begin again and again.
"Self Annihilation"......... EXACTLY!
Watching due to people I know showing all sorts of behaviors that are rarely discussed on the internet around their drinking. So thankful I was never into heavy drinking. Now I'm zero carb and hardly drink at all. I appreciate your channel.
Those are all my reasons too. Very good to finally hear someone say them. Including the sober dating part and the fear of success. The only difference is that I am a non-drinking polydrug user.
8 days into a relapse right now and binge listening all your episodes based solely on your channel name and some of the episodes resonating at fever pitch. I started with you describing a binge. I was in. Am in.
Hey mate don’t know if you’ll read this but I found your videos and it’s actually so refreshing to hear an honest and raw outlook on alcoholism, I can relate a lot to your videos and it’s helped me stay sober for 50 ish days now, anyways just wanted to say I’ve found your videos very helpful and you’re doing an amazing job 🙏
Hey Greg! I'm really happy you've found my videos useful. Congrats on 50-ish days, long may it continue!
@@_BatCountry thanks legend !
Went through my own personal hell, this stuff helps for sure. Your words are like music to my ears even though I never drank alcohol.
"I don't want to feel normal". That's me right there, 100%.
"Normal" sucks 😞
Great video, as always.
You are certainly courageous. Thank you for sharing, it's really meaningful. A big hug from Italy. ❤
Thank you very much, that's very kind :)
Thanks for an honest and accurate look at the complexities of withdrawals and relapse. I’ve been in deep denial for decades but last week a daily diet of spirits by the litre forced my hand and I sought help via an ambulance to A&E. This was 3 days ago and the hard work begins.
Hey Mark, thanks for the comment. How's it going today? Are you confident you can get on top of this thing?
@@_BatCountry Still dry and the gloom has cleared, I've had some guidance and support and all seems good, if a little boring. Thanks BC for the kindness. Hope you are well too.
Yea man, I was that kind. It’s amazing I didn’t die on the floor in withdrawal near death events.
I have just relapsed again, been through detox twice and was proud to be over 6 months AF! I’m ashamed and embarrassed, and I realise that it happens so quickly 😢
Ah nuts, sorry to hear that Jayne. While I know that relapse is part of the process, and I've been there myself, don't let that become an excuse for it to happen again. One day at a time, ya know?
@@_BatCountry thank you! I’ve managed to get some Diazepam from the GP which I will start tomorrow morning for a few days, I will get this crap out of my system again! 😍
There's this weird addiction to the trauma of the withdrawal.
YES! I've been trying to articulate that for so long now and haven't found the words. THANK you.
I feel it's this weird momentum vibration within us. Our bodies are reactive energies. I feel us sensitives are different and more alluring to energies. Imo.
Excellent video. I identify with a lot of what you describe about relapse. 👍
Self sabotage has been a recurring problem for me for long as I can remember,13 weeks sober from alcohol and weed and feeling generally very good so far, but just recently feeling slightly vulnerable to a slide especially on weekends.I think my pink cloud has dissipated somewhat but I do still fell determined not to start again.Thanks for your insights, your talks help a lot
Hang in there mate. The 3 month mark was a stumbling block for me a couple of times, so hang on until you're past that and assess how you're feeling then. Thanks for the comment!
It is horrible. I am right there with you, brother. Euphoric recall and the disease process and disconnect of frontal cortex from the midbrain is my answer.
We are kindred spirits….i can not believe the specificity of our shared thoughts & experiences. Good luck out there.
Why do I relapse? “It’s been 6 week, I must be okay then.”
Yeah, that's a cunning little trick it plays on us.
Very intelligent and articulate man. I have in no way been through what you have, however struggling with addiction. You talk so much sense and have hit a few nerves. Wish you all the best and hope you keep things positive for yourself. Life is not easy for anyone.
Thank you mate! Onwards and upwards.
You really touched on some very impactful issues in this video, especially regarding sex without alcohol. I remember the days long before the internet when people had very limited options far as meeting new people for either a fling or looking develop a relationship. Going to bars and using alcohol which to some more than others was a very necessary part of the experience, for a shy person like myself, one of the only options. Talking with someone behind a keyboard is much less stressful and it would have helped me immensely although it is hard to say how I would have handled it then if I had the option to meet over the internet. I would imagine meeting someone face to face for the first time after communicating over the internet is as nerve wracking or more thus increasing the desire to drink. Overall, the internet is still a healthier way to get to know someone at a safe distance than going to a bar.
Thank you for this great video and I can really relate to the "why?" question, similarly I can't get to the bottom of why I keep returning to the drink despite having experienced all the lows of it as well as the highs of sobriety. Irrational. Insane. I can't understand it so how can I expect my loved one's to understand. It's a conundrum for sure. Tam
Thanks for your recent comments Tam. It's so confusing and irrational, right? It's just a very weird problem to have.
Binging on your vids, thanks for your efforts! 19 days sober after a lapse.
Welcome back to sobriety, and congrats on your time. How you feeling today?
@@_BatCountry A good, productive day, done weights as well - should be feeling endorphins, yet absolutely flat... At least I should sleep well tonight.
your viewpoint is very valuable.. your bravery ..honesty.i think you are helping many sir..
Thank you mate, I hope so!
Yes, that DESIRE for isolation is hard to explain to ppl. Like half the time I don’t answer the phone. Stay in and rarely go out etc..
I dnt even drink but addicted to how u tell stories 😂
I guess I better keep it up then, we don't want you going through withdrawal.
I recently discovered your channel and just want to express my appreciation for your work! I wish I’d had this in my life earlier, but I probably wouldn’t have been able to take in what you’re saying😅 big ups
Thank you mate, that means a lot. I hope you're doing well today.
Another incredibly articulate video. Well done! Keep em coming.
Thank you! Stay tuned, I'll never tire of talking about this stuff.
Very coherent, very good.
Personally I laugh out loud to myself with my rediculas 'justifications' for having a drink.
Really liked this and so relatable x
I can relate to the fear of success - I know where I am and what I need to do when things aren't going my way. I work hard, gym, tidy, relax etc but when things are going well, god help me. We learn though (the hard way) and I'm aware of this now.
Holy shit batto. You’re a brilliant man. Think we all love you x
Thank you mate, and back at ya.
Man I really like your brutal honesty. I am really impressed at the depth of your discussions and will be back. Whats your name?
I'm exactly the same as you. I'm a gambler not with the horses or pools but with my life. I love chaos. My heroes are the outsiders, the artists like The Velvets, Bukowski, Lennon, the freedom fighters leading the revolution against the man. Im afraid of failure so I fail and When I'm succeeding I celebrate to the point where I can't get out of bed and collect my award. It's been a cycle of patterns that have led nowhere but to isolation so I dive into recording music at home trying to create my masterpiece that is magically going to make me rich and live a care free life of booze birds and drugs. But it only ever ends up with depression.
you'll get to a better place soon
Thanks for a honest video. This is an insidious disease which tells you it's ok to do the thing you know is wrong, but convinces you is right. I've had 4 sober years, happy years, but that little voice, every once in a while whispers, 'go on, it'll be ok'. I've learned to push it aside, not to listen, to ignore it. All the pain and suffering is there, waiting for me if I drink. Today, I chose not to drink.
More videos please! They help keep me sober too. 🙏
You got it Adrian, I'll keep them coming. Thanks for the support!
Great point was dating and that seems to be my achilies heal, I got sober as a single man for 2 years I let dating back in my life and struggled when in a sexual situation and relapsed as alcohol had always been there too relax the situation, I'm sure in time this will heal itself with the correct mindset but as you say it's mostly outside forces I have to address, a most informative video
It’s happened to me when stressed arise even though alcohol no longer even has a euphoric or even much sedative effect I think it’s the memory of previous ‘happy’ experiences pulling on your subconscious to get out of a stressful scenario
I think you're onto something there mate.
Absolutely. Each time I've gone back to drinking in the past five years or so, I've been disappointed with the effects. I can remember one time in 2021 I drank some bourbon after a day of skiing and that came close to the euphoria one drink should have. All other times it's really about getting to the point and hitting 4 or 5 off the bat because what is the point of 1 or 2? Then it's just chasing a better feeling that really never arrives... which can lead to other things unfortunately.
When I get into a low mood and am lacking willpower, I'll do a mini meditation or thought experiment and experience the night of drinking from start to finish and when I arrive at the next morning and it's just me laying there feeling awful, I suddenly don't want to drink. It's so easy to forget where it ends.
Thank you so much for your videos I am relating so much. Day 14 sober
Congratulations on your sober time! Long may it continue :)
Alcoholism is a self-destructive disease, it is pleasant in the beginnign but later on you become a slave, a beggar, and alcoholism is your absolute Master.
Yep.
I can or could when I was young socialise only while drinking. Completely a different person. I seemed so confident it was unbelievable . So maybe the companionship of the pub draws some of us in.?
I think the reason I would go back to drinking after experiencing so much wreckage is that there were still a bit of relief and some rewards left in drinking. Once the rewards were gone for good, going back lost its hold on me. I drank the fun out of the bottle. Straight up. 😞
That's well put.
I feel like some people are more prone to DT's than others. I've been through some dangerous withdrawals and multiple alcohol seizures, but I've never been in a true state of delirium.
I have relapsed before when what I think is a sudden negative problem that bangs up - my fear instinct rises considerably and then I make the wrong decision to quell my anxiety. This has happened 3 times. So, now, I must learn to Think before Reacting. The devil is a crafty player. Im on day 2 of withdrawing and so I rise up and try again. Hopefully, with more wisdom.
Hi Cyn! Relapsing is hard, but I'm very happy to hear your determination to keep trying. It's horrible now, but it's worth it in the long run. Good luck, and keep us updated.
Excellent video :)
I’ve done this so many times…. Once something goes against me I think I’ll get pissed 🤦🏼♂️
Yeah that's pretty common. It sticks eventually though.
@@_BatCountry I often look at booze whilst shopping I’m not tempted to buy I just find myself looking….
Some people attempt to withdraw from alcohol without medical assistance, if the case is really terrible of course you can die or remain mentally disturbed forever. Doctors can sedate you while the body goes through that terrible time but again I've never been there and my congratulations to you Bat Country for overcoming that monsters everyday.
Dont need an excuse to relapse. Good news, bad news, indifferent news, or just full on self pity. The path to event horizon self destruction flicks on like a 20 watt lightbulb. Pint after pint. Line after line. Where x meets y. Perpetual self harm. Guilt. Self worth. Doubt. The bermuda triangle of the addiction.
And if there's no reason to relapse, we'll invent one.
@@_BatCountry we do. it sickens me Stu. i'm flushing my life down the armitage shanks u bend. Again. i dont even enjoy drinking and snorting. it's a bore. it's a chore. yet here i am. again. risible.
For me it's not weird that when good things happen you want to drink. Basicly you are getting a chemical kick in your brain when things are going well, and then your brain is like "well you know how we could get an even bigger kick?"
In my last 15 years I went to hells dungeon many times over and over again I’d be drinking and drugging it to oblivion in 1 hour it’s mental then it would go on for weeks
So glad I beat my craving for alcohol. I replaced with cannabis and cannabis has me in therapy and is trying to get my life in order. Turned out I was using alcohol to treat my military PTSD. I went from 10 years of being a black out drunk, 6 to 12+ beers, to a gram or so of cannabis a day. I am with you, if I get too excited I get triggered as well. So I have to live in a very mild state, I can't get too sad or too happy. A promotion at work triggered me to 3 months in bed telling myself, "I am going to screw this up some how," and it became a self-fulfilling prophecy. So now I have to focus on the basics such as food, shelter, healthy pets, bills paid and the rest is just extra. Just a trip to Taco Bell for my free veteran meal is too much for me because I am fearful I am going to get triggered and yell at the poor person giving my my burrito or a customer just trying to enjoy their day. Alcohol was a mask I was using. I still have my issues but I am not blacked out drunk vomiting on everything and I have money in my pocket and I am glad for that.
I'm happy to hear your positive outlook on this stuff mate. I don't need to tell you that the way vets are treated is pretty shameful, and I hope you continue to move forward despite the obstacles.
So I seen a few of your videos now and ima sub and like. I’m a binge drinker. I’ll binge for 3-5 days and then stop for 6 months to a year. But each time I decide to drink it’s aways bad. At first I used to drink every day and a few years ago and I decided to slow down…. Which lead me to binge drinking temporarily and stoping but it’s good and bad. I’m trying to figure out what causes me to act in such a destructive way when I can stop this for long periods of time.
I used to look up to Jim Morrison. I wanted to be like him. Alcohol, drugs, and sex.
I just had almost 2 months & went out after high expectations of a potential love interest. Right after a bad breakup on June. I tried to get into another relationship only a month into sobriety.
Have you ever considered doing research into the current data on the biological and genetic factors that play into alcohol use disorder? It’s been well established that people can have a genetic predisposition to alcoholism and consequent relapse.
Do you eat vegetables and whole grains?
You don’t start over. You get up and keep going😂🎉❤ who is perfect? Learn hard lessons. Get help and keep going 😅 look ahead and up!
Onwards and upwards always.
When I’m in a happy mood I get the wine out to elongate and maintain it but next day I beat myself up. Weird I know
That's pretty standard, until you truly understand that the benefits of drinking are artificial.
fear of success - rings a bell here....
There is no rational answer to why people relapse even when they know how bad withdrawal can be. The decision to go back to drinking is not based on reason or logic. Addictions are not logical. The most effective method I have used to not go back to drinking is to write down the pros and cons of drinking again, the benefits and consequences. There may be 2 or 3 benefits and 15 negative consequences and I still sometimes go back. That is not deductible reasoning.
Because alcohol is an addictive substance.
Once you get on Naltrexone and start the sinclair method, you will reach the point of extinction where you no longer care about alcohol. It's a beautiful thing.🎉
Yes until you realise ypu just have to stop taking the nal I did it and my friend did it we are both sober now
Just relapsed there. 2 weeks, but 99% sure I am done now. I didn’t not enjoy any of it. Like WTH. Got off quite easy re withdrawal. I did kind of taper a bit which I know BC doesn’t agree with. This is the 5th or 6th relapse since summer 2020. Best wishes to everyone x
Oh no, sorry to hear that. For what it's worth, it took me 5 or 6 serious relapses before sobriety really stuck. So get to work, it is well within your own power to control this thing.
@@_BatCountry appreciate that. I’m on it. Finished your book last night. Loved it.
Drank hard, real hard but even 3 to 5 bottles of wine a day for years wasn't enough to give me the DTs when i finally quit. I have a funny kind of 'respect' for the guys that can consume enough to be at risk of the DTs.
Yeah I know what you mean.
It wasn't until I watched a few BC videos that I realized I could've actually kicked it up a notch this entire time. Never had DT and I'm not sure if I could've gotten to that point. The worst was unstoppable cold sweats, no body temp regulation, inability to sleep, and absolute dread that I might be forced to interact with someone - about two days worth of it. My body tapped out and I don't think I could've physically drank any more.
First of all, the word relapse is very often used incorrectly. In my own case, I experienced countless vain attempts to quit drinking, sometimes with a little bit of what I thought was success. It might have been a few days, weeks, etc. When I drank again, it was because I never fully conceded to my innermost self that I was the "root problem"! THAT'S NOT a relapse. You can't relapse from something you were NEVER a part of!!! (RECOVERY)
A relapse is when we have started to live in the solution, by changing our playgrounds, and playmates, and as a result of those changes, our lives start to get better. Then, the "ISM" tells me "It wasn't that bad", and one bad decision leads to another bad decision, which leads to the pitiful incomprehensible demoralization...AGAIN. THAT is a relapse! You've stopped doing the very thing you KNOW was making your life better. All the best...Mark 5/8/1994 ✌
Thanks for this Mark, and huge congrats on your sober time!
yes its a dichotomy that goes round and round..i need some beer..that will make everything ok but then it doesnt..i have been caught in a liquid prison..and i forget where i put the keys.
oof... liquid prison, that's very poetic, I love that.
Because you're me
JUST BEHAVE
What’s crazy is that somehow covid caused brain inflammation for me for close to a year. I was not the same person. It felt exactly like when I had a severe concussion when I was younger. Started having anger outbursts and extreme addictive behavior that I never experienced ever. I ended up basically daily for a year. 10-15 drinks everyday. Sometimes even more. I never left the house either because somehow the brain inflammation caused me to develop panic attacks. Alcohol probably didn’t help with my brain health and made matters worse. It was scary and very unlike my normal self to drink that much. I was a social drinker before and would go out with friends on a Friday or Saturday and have a few drinks but never touched it during the week. It was like in a 24 hour period I became a reckless person. Not caring about the consequence of getting obliterated and not being able to function. Or the fact that my family was extremely concerned
As for the government paying for therapy.....Medi-Cal absolutely pays for SUD treatment and therapy. Clients get free treatment and therapy through Medi-Cal and the client can relapse and enroll again and again and again and it's absolutely free. I live in California so only speaking for my state.
Have you tried TSM?
No I haven't personally. What are your thoughts about it?
@@_BatCountryit's amazing until you decide you want to feel the alcohol and stop taking the pills it did help my overall process though
Some people are so much more comfortable with the suffering that their is a huge part of them that the feeling unwanted and having no respect from anyone is ingrained because of a lack of self esteem because sometimes when they start doing well they can't accept themselves as anything other than the quivering wreck in the corner whose destroyed everything again and compliments and well dones feel like evil lies from people who only weeks before despised them ,it's not their faults it's the drinks way back in and needs a complete rewiring of the soul and a long period of sobriety to convince the alcoholic that they have anything other than a piece of s..t.
A very sad lonely disease that isn't just content with killing people but wants to send them to the grave completely destroyed and alone .
It's worse to keep drinking
I can't relapse.
I have no money
No car
And don't attend parties.
I stay home .
Problem solved
If I may suggest something, don't overestimate your head injury, it may smoetimes at least be a part of how you justify relapses to yourself. While it may be detrimental to same degree, obviously you do have control not to take the first drink.
Truth. I'm passed that now, but you're right, I should be cautious with it.
So then you would be self sabotaging kind of like I’m gonna break up with you before you break up with me. And your mind you feel like it’s inevitable so being a control freak which you are, but you just don’t know it yet you’re gonna be the one that controls whether or not you drink again or you don’t drink again whether or not you’re successful or you’re not at the end of the dayyou don’t have fear of success you want to self sabotage yourself by relapsing so you’ll never know and you can blame the relapse. You have a fear of failure, not of success.
“I like troubled artists”
Bro, your channel is called Bat Country- we know lmao
I tried AA meeting the folks too needy and ask for money.
The girls I met at AA were a very bad influence on me.
Ah yes the alcohol to anarchosocialism pipeline
Commonly mistaken for the “vodka to revolutionary vanguardism pipeline” and the “bourbon to revolutionary jacobin republicanism” pipeline.
Try mushrooms it got my husband sober he’s been sober for 5 years he stopped doing the mushrooms 2 years ago also quit smoking
Yeah a few people have recommended that but I'm a little bit wary. I might give it a try in the future.
@@_BatCountry you won’t know how much it will help you until you try it. I’m not telling you to do it to get high or have a great time. It creates retrospection into your life as to why you do things. It’s an ancient medicine I think people relapse because they have no idea why they drink in the first place. I wish you nothing but success and I hope you stay sober and figure out what you’re driving factor is. Get to the root of the problem you’re worth it.
@@jeanieologist4456 thanks for this, I've been searching for the reason why I keep going back to drink for at least 15 years, even after years of sobriety and knowing all about the pain and trouble that awaits me, I return to booze like a moth to the flame. I've tried all sorts to find out why without success, including AA, but maybe the mushrooms can help me find the reason.
Go to lots ov aa meeting stick around like minded people you want do it alone our own will power is not enough 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻📕📕📕📕📕
You are speaking to me personally jesus 😢