Therapist Reacts to EASY A with guest Hannah Witton
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 30 ก.ย. 2024
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How do you practice consent in every relationship? How do you show true empathy?
Licensed therapist Jonathan Decker and filmmaker Alan Seawright are joined by TH-camr and sex educator, Hannah Witton, to react to Easy A. They dive into the lie Olive takes on and how it spirals out of control. Jonathan talks about how women's sexuality is often focused on anything but a woman's autonomy, and Hannah shares important lessons about consent in all relationships. They reflect on Olive's extreme selflessness which enables others' selfishness and how that pulls Olive further away from her true self.
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Written by: Megan Seawright, Jonathan Decker, and Alan Seawright
Produced by: Jonathan Decker, Megan Seawright, Alan Seawright, and Corinne Demyanovich
Edited by: Jenna Schaelling
Director of Photography: Bradley Olsen
English Transcription by: Anna Preis
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Thanks so much for having us!
Can you guys do an episode on Dracula untold.
I LOVE THIS! I know you guys get a lot of requests, but an important topic I thought might be great to discuss is ASD in “Happy Feet”? I’m rewatching it now as an autistic person and suddenly relating to a lot of symptoms in mumble. Only when u have the time ofcourse, y’all r my safe space. X
That book sounds great. Consent is so important, and the more conversations there are about it, the better
can you please do a therapist reacts to princess kaguya?
My favorite movie quote of all time is from this movie.
"...but I'm adopted." *bangs fist on cabinets* "who told you?! We were supposed to do that as a family." Lol
Mine too, my favourite scene with Olive's parents would be when they're trying to guess the rude word that she got in trouble with, and then suggesting that she spell it out with her peas!
Agreed.
Followed by, later at dinner: "So...where are you from, originally?" 😂
I love the family together dynamic so much. I choked laughing at the “WHO TOLD YOU?!”. Its so wholesome when they are together.
I loved the banter between Olive and her family so much. They had amazing chemistry!
I wanted to thank Hannah for bringing up how consent plays out in every realm of social relationships, not just sex.
Saying no can be so incredibly difficult. I've cme to really value and only put my trust in people who respect when I say no
My mom always tells me that one of the hardest things to learn in life is how to say no. How to say no and how to say "I was wrong" are some of the hardest things to get the hang of.
As the other side of that coin, I also respect someone a lot more when they do say "no" instead of just always saying "maybe" or being non-committal when after you know them for a while, you know it's most likely a no.
Yes, Hannah's point was great! Consent is everywhere!
An amazing lesson to learn that I feel like sadly a lot of people (especially women) learn far later than they should. Doesn't help when social media and Facebook exploit and cultivate low self esteem for monetary gain.
I feel like this can be tricky because a lot of people today have a sense of entitlement that goes both ways: there's those that demand you attend to their whims but there's also those who are offended that you don't consider their whims locked in stone. Like you can't try to persuade your friend to try anything new because that's not respecting their wishes?
I don't enjoy social engagements but my mom and sisters love them. I go to parties at their houses for them, not for myself, because it would hurt them if I didn't show up. That's not them being mean to me for not just allowing me to remain a hermit all the time because they don't constantly ask me to come or badger me about my need for alone time. That's the give and take of all relationships. So there's a difference between respecting consent and selfishness/self-centeredness that I don't see being addressed often in modern discussions. It feels like this generation is all or nothing and "no contact" over the slightest inconvenience, instead of just when there's actual unhealthy relationships.
Olive's parents in this movie were my favorite characters. I love how even though they knew she was going through something, they let her come to them in her own time and made sure she knew they were there to support her no matter what. also, they were freaking hilarious! 🤣
Yeah, and her dad is Stanley Tucci he's always great in everything he's in. You know the movie is going to be great if he's in it
I know they were focusing on the sexuality debate on this video but I wish they had talked more about her family dynamics. I absolutely love them as a family!
“T…t,t,t….tallywhacker? Termagent?” 😂
@@bellaknightR597 absolutely! Stanley Tucci is the G.O.A.T.
@@maricamp1833 YES! I thought their family dynamic was so refreshing and not seen enough in modern media. I'm hoping they might revisit this one and focus on Olive's family and how they interacted. here's hoping 🤞
I always got the impression that Olive and Rhiannon had been besties from a young age, and only hung out as teenagers out of habit. They didn't seem to really like each other that much, since Rhiannon couldn't tell when Olive was lying, even when she initially tried to come clean, and regularly called her a bitch, which Olive pointed out.
Lol, I think we all had that friend at one point in our lives.
@@hotarubinarikoabsolutely! Makes me think of an ex-coworker- we were as good as friends as we could be while we were stuck working together but it was a very toxic and taxing relationship. The moment I left that job, everything between us just unraveled and it was one of the most liberating experiences ever! 🙌🏼
@@justingary5322 All I see here is giant non-stop paragraphs of bluh. Like, if you want people to read stuff... try breaking it up into actually readable bits. Not... that. Also... uhh... no one wants to know about your religious preferences here. That's not the topic of conversation, has nothing to do with any part of this video. So...yeah. Timing matters, man.
Speak for yourself
There was a video essay about easy a. And in the production the two were supposed to represent the common childhood girl friendship that had underlying lesbian tones.
This movie really put Emma Stone on everyone's radar. She absolutely carried. The supporting cast is also insanely good. This film is so fun, but I definitely roll my eyes when Olive says that no one would've taken notice of her before all the rumors happened. Like, c'mon.
Preach, while I adore this movie, it's a little hard to believe that someone as gorgeous, charming and witty as Olive would be so overlooked in school, while looking like Emma Stone.
Nah, I knew girls that hot in highschool (high school me's opinion at least) who knew how to go unnoticed. trick was to be a theater techie; only the theater kids know how to notice them.
I'd say I'm conventionally beautiful and I'm still very much unnoticed even tho I can be witty too. The trick is to be an intovert.
You forget that most actors are gorgeous so OUR eyes stay glued to the screen. When a character says they're ugly and nobody objectively argues it we are meant to believe they are ugly. Olive IRL would not be as hot as Emma Stone.
Did she carry or was the supporting cast insanely good? It cannot be both.
Really liked the commentary about consent in non-sexual situations. I admit I hadn't really thought about it from that perspective before because when we say "consent" it's almost _always_ used in reference to sexual situations. But I think that's an important reframing, to shine a light on how plenty of other relationships can be non-consensual.
It may be my politics showing, but it seems to me that consent only being considered in sexual matters is deliberate. We are indoctrinated into a series of hierarchical situations; from parents to teachers to bosses we are told that others have more control over your time and freedom to act than we do.
How many stories are coming forward of people standing their ground when bosses change work schedules and put workers on shifts for which they’re unavailable. Plus bosses that add workloads that were not part of the job description. Getting ‘voluntold’. Consent implies a dynamic of equals and that makes it harder to exploit people.
@@nightfall3605 Yeah, any positive momentum ever made is always with the caveat of people limiting the scope of it to protect their own gain. Which is even worse since it's usually just perceived gain and they'd actually be better off not trying to exploit other people. It's sad how common it is for people to ultimately act against their own best interests in the pursuit of obtaining or maintaining just any little scrap of power.
One of the places where folks are talking the most about consent in a non-sexual context is around dog (and other animal) care and training. Folks are learning to observe various cues about when and how their companions want to interact and they’re even learning techniques to teach their companions how to opt into, or opt out of, activities like brushing, nail trims, ear cleaning, etc. To learn more, search “cooperative care”. It’s very exciting stuff! 🐾
Consent exists in non sexual areas as well, it's even the core of boundaries outside of things you put in place to make you feel safe, it's what you consent to how ppl behave and speak towards you.
@@MarcyPeskaI love your example! I'm going to live with a dog soon and want to get more into cooperation. Thanks for dropping the key word, I'm going to use it to look more into it 😊
Can we also take a moment to gush about how cool Olive's family is in this movie? I loved every scene they were in.
Soooooo cool!
Ditto, we'd all love Stanley Tucci and Patricia Clarkson as our parents!
i'm so hyped that alan threw in that reference to one of the greatest comedy moments in teen movie history!
This is such a big part of the movie :D I have an idea: a video about healthy parenting and this movie should be in the list @CinemaTherapyShow
OH MY GOD DON'T TELL HIM HE'S ADOPTED
Lisa Kudrow's character provides an excellent example of self-justification. To paraphrase Terry Pratchett, she's so busy insisting that sleeping with a student is legal because he's not underage, she totally avoids Olive's reaction of "But it's WRONG."
Yes!!! Also, she says, "My marriage isn't that great. We haven't had sex in months. Months!" She can't hold out and practice self-control for a few months? She couldn't talk to her husband about her needs? I get that communication is scary, but she'd rather throw everything away instead of communicate? And she's willing to damage a student's reputation and help propogate the lies said about her in the process! She sounds like a narcissist or a sociopath to me. lol
@@kristadallimore those are only excuses, she didn’t sleep with her husband for months because she was getting it on with student. Every cheater blames their spouse.
@@kristadallimore Also... Where did she get chlamydia from? I think it suggests she's been cheating way before she met that student. She is evil.
There's the risk of becoming a doormat when you are selflessly trying to help people. This is an absolutely genius film.
My mother used to say : Everybody's darling, everybody's assh*le.
but she wasn't being selfless, she asked for money as an exchange
the only time she didn't was to cover for the teacher
@@FruityHachiBrandon offered to pay her while trying to convince her and so did the other guy. After that the rumour spread so people starting coming up to her with forms of payment in hand already
@@emillee-raine but she did took the money, and saw how she can get something for herself too = not selfless
@@FruityHachias she should?.. where you expecting for her to be drag socially by everybody with no compensation whatsoever? Tipic bitter men who gets salty about women getting her bag..
Dan Byrd should really receive more leading roles in Hollywood. Brandon's monologue over how badly the bullying he faces for being gay really effected him broke my heart, and resonates with many people who are struggling with their Sexuality.
I've seen so many comments by you under sooo many different videos. I think we have the same taste in TH-cam videos hahahha
Being gay is still SO frowned upon ? In Hollywood?
I am *pretty* sure there happens much more in Hollywood than 2 men having any type of relationship.
I am a Gen X and it was "not a big deal - since Freddy Mercury (when sadly HIV raised it's ugly head , but all people in my nursing education on HIV were done by women who's husbands cheated at a strip club or swinger club , not caring... )
It's just not my kind of thing, as I am a skinny, boring hetero female, probably ace, so as long as you let me do me , I let you do you.
*Why is this still a so complicted concept ?*
Like they say : "personal freedom ends where it bothers orhers" - or something similar.
@@chaicoffeecup Or maybe it's just a bot. They have a lot of comments just under this video, and a bunch of subscribers but no content 🤨
I agree
He's in Young Sheldon
I actually think the message to this movie is less about being yourself, and more about learning the importance of not owing people explanations or of info that they believe their entitled to. Because the movie covers a lot of conversation on rumors and how fast they travel in high school and Olive always trying roll with those punches but she does it in a way that makes everyone more and more interested in her business.
yesss
I assumed that rolling with the punches doesnt lead you places. That you have to stand up for yourself,
Personally I think Lobster Todd is the best role model to not be a horrible person. He's respectful and looks at Olive for who she is, uses consent, and is really charming
which is ironic considering his most popular role XD
@@zarengurl Some of us remember the "Gossip Girl" days, eons before "You."
@@SinHurr nice
@@SinHurr not that he was respectful in that 😂
One of the little details I've always loved about this movie, is at 12:12 when she's talking to the guidance counselor she says "I'm not judging you but oh my god" and it's kind of a callback to earlier when her mom said "no judgement but you kind of look like a stripper" like you really see the influence her parents had on her as they raised her. I'm actually surprised you didn't talk more about the family in general but specifically her parents. Another great model of a good relationship, good marriage. Stanley Tucci of course is amazing and can do no wrong. Pairing him with Patricia Clarkson was just...stroke of genius.
They talk more about the parents on Hannah's channel, called "More Hannah", in a video where they rank several movie parents including them! very cool video, I recommend it.
I think the first kid, he didn't intend to pull on her empathy, but Lisa Kudrow's character WAS manipulating her.
This movie is the only time Lisa Kudrow has made me hate her, I love Lisa Kudrow
Exactly! She's a counselor for crying out loud, she definitely knows what she's doing and how to manipulate a student whom she knows very well.
As a teenager I had a reputation for being a slut; human sexuality fascinates me so I talked about it a lot, I asked questions, I wasn't offended or awkward about it. Importantly, I also wasn't having lots of sex and actually only had it in relationships, but the teenage society around me assumed that because I talked about it and wasn't coy or awakard that I must be a "slut."
Fast forward to this year (I'm 35) when a male friend said to me "you're not used to men saying no to you," and I suddenly realised that at some point between being branded that way as a teenager and men thinking they could take it from me because I had that repuation, I had become someone who used my sexuality to get what I wanted - because it was going to be used by someone one way or another, it might as well be me.
I don't like that about myself and it wasn't a conscious thing, I think at some point it was a protection mechanism, and I'm working really hard on changing that mindset and developing a more healthy relationship to my own sexuality and to relationships with men, but it's just yet more 💩to wade through that didn't need to be there.
That sounds like a powerful realization. I wish you well on your growth journey! 💕
Yes!!! I’m a slut too due to my heels and lingerie, and yet I’m not one to sleep with someone for so called fun. I take it seriously. If I sleep with someone it has deep meaning!!! I don’t understanding dating and many men want to met me yet all they want is sex! I adore sex but need a playmate that is stable in many ways!!!
wow that's some deep shit :) Getting that outside perspective from friends can help us grow so much...
I’m confused to some degree??? So you talk about sex? Men do it and it’s normals!!!! Sex is not a bad! I hear that you need to change because you’re not sleeping around and need to change the way you talk too???? Ok so I see talking about sex to men when dating could lead them to believe you’re easy but that’s just stupid! That is an assumption. Now if your flashing nudes or sexy photos I can see the mix up but then again you can do that without having sex with a man!!! Hell nude beaches exist!
@@Portia620 I'm saying that being treated that way led me to the unconscious belief that my sexuality is currency and the only way for me to benefit in any way from it is to use it as such. I want to change that.
I'll never change that I talk about sex a lot, sex and sexuality is one of my special interests which seems to be really common among demisexuals interestingly too!
The first time I watched the film, I was absolutely shocked when Anson the creep attempted to take advantage of Olive, since the movie had been so lighthearted up to then. Fortunately, Olive magaged to get away from him. Also, after seeing Penn Badgley play a charming serial killer for years, it's almost a surprise to see him as a genuine nice guy.
I will say that I only knew Penn from Easy A instead of You and when re-watching Easy A for the first time in a while was like I know he is in something else, lol. Then I googled it and seen that I also loved his role in John Tucker Must Die! he started in rom-com's and i love the curve he did with You!
It’s so funny to think about how Penn’s typecast has changed. Back then he was the boy next door in everything! Between You and the dumb plot twist at the end of Gossip Girl, his typecast totally 180’d
LOL, He went from a nice guy to a "nice guy" in his roles!
They didn’t talk about them, but Olive’s parents are one of, if not my absolute favorite, parental couples on film. They were honestly the stand outs for me with this movie.
They talk more about the parents on Hannah's channel, called "More Hannah", in a video where they rank several movie parents including them! very cool video, I recommend it.
No. They were cringe.
I love hugs in movies. There's really nothing sexual about them, so to me they feel like almost a *closer* form of showing intimacy than a kiss. A hug just makes people feel safe and seen and valued, vs a kiss that might "lead somewhere" in the relationship. Idk, probably not explaining it well. I usually just enjoy a lovely hug over a kiss as a character interaction. :)
Hugs are the best thing ever!!!
Wish that in some cultures hugs weren’t seen as so strange. I think i’ve really been conditioned to so little, or no hugs, that I find it tough to communicate with ppl that way. Ofc my own anxiety is a big part but i do know that there’s a lot of ppl in America, where i grew up, that really struggle with the sort of physical-touch taboo and lack of physical touch in commonplace relationships. I’m talking men especially. Compare to that to infamously more intimate friendships that ppl point out about in Southern Europe or Mediterranean cultures, i do envy that. Idk maybe its just me and some ppl just can create friendships where hugs are normal. The only time it makes sense to hug is with family for me
Past Lives and the first time they meet is a GREAT example of this, the awkwardness and confusion of hugs, i mean there’s such a precise insane social standard/rules to how long, and how tight one hugs, down to the seconds, and anything more is weird.
I related so hard to Olive. I was well out of high school when this movie came out, but i was an invisible virgin bookworm back then. Weirdly when i actually put any effort into my looks I was called a slut, so I always went right back into my shell (baggie jeams and flannels). Also, her parents are the best.
Agreed, I was just going into high school when the movie was released, and I identified with Olive so much. We'd all love Stanley Tucci and Patricia Clarkson as our parents!
hey that was me in high school too! except i never put effort into my looks and people called me "psycho bitch" and there may have been some rumors of me being a lesbian (which was ironic because my best friend at the time turned out to ACTUALLY be a lesbian).
"C'est la vie." "La vie." That was one of my buddy John's favorite jokes. I loved that wonderful idiot. As an aside, the best kisses I've ever had in my life began with the phrase "would it be okay if I kissed you?" And hugs. Man, hugs are just the best. Hugs cement me to the world and to the people I love. My friends, my family, my child, even strangers, sometimes. Hugs heal wounds in ways that words never can.
Yes. Hugs. Hugs are so underappreciated. A guy friend of mine recently told me that I give really good hugs and it felt like one of the best, most heartfelt compliments I've ever received.
@@mcedwards That's awesome!
@ericthompson3982 - Hugs feel SO GOOD both physically and emotionally. They can be so fulfilling all by themselves.
@@MossyMozart Truth.
I don't even get that joke
The conversation about consent really made me smile because it brought back a great memory for me.
I’d been friends with a guy for about six months, and we knew there were sparks as soon as we met- but I had just gotten out of a really bad relationship, and I think on the second day of knowing me, my friend said “Yeah, I’ll never date, I’ll never trust anyone that much.” And he also made it clear very early on he hated being touched. Well, cut to six months later and he asks me out on a real date. It goes well and he’s walking me back to my car, and it’s that teetering moment of maybe we might hug, but I’m not sure, I don’t want to push him into something he doesn’t want. But, he reached for me, we hug, and he doesn’t try to let go or move away, so I asked him “Can I kiss you?” I was a little scared he’d say no, but again, I really wanted to make sure it was ok. He just grinned and went for it.
We ended up breaking up eventually, but that was still such a good moment, at least for me. So, moral of the story, asking for explicit consent is great, even if it’s a less traditional version where the girl asks the guy.
If I had the chance to have had Stanley Tucci as my dad when I was in high school, it would have been amazing. But I’m grateful to both my amazing parents. Plus Emma Stone slays as always ❤
Olive's parents and favourite teacher certainly stole the show in all of their scenes. I wouldn't mind seeing a spinoff about them all! Stanley Tucci, Patricia Clarkson and Thomas Haden Church are the epitome of awesomeness!
You expect nothing less from Patricia Clarkson and Stanley Tucci, but I was surprised by Thomas Haden Church when this came out.
I AM SO HAPPY YOU DID THIS MOVIE! Easy A is one of my top 10 FAVORITE movies ever. I've rewatched it so many times from the moment it came out till now. I loved the discussion about consent being part of every aspect of a relationship you have with someone, whether its romantic, sexual, platonic, or familial. If we can't even say no to our friends, then how can we say no when it comes to sexual intimacy! That really is such a important lesson to learn. How to say reject others and how to accept rejection from others.
Glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for watching!
I agree with you 100% on everything :D I have also watched this movie sooo many times ^^
The realest thing to me was when Evan says "You know I don't need your permission." Women and female presenting people are so often threatened and blackmailed in this way, and spoken of behind closed doors - "locker room talk" and such. And it also demonstrates the idea that we are not respected or given choice because we deserve it as equal human beings, but rather that choice is a privilege thats gifted to us by "superior beings" - most often, men. This scene with him portrays the toxic masculinity of "women are objects, lets pass them around like trading cards and say we have them when we don't" to impress other men. Unfortunately, there is reality to his statement in that people don't really acquire permission to spread rumours- she didn't need to have any of those approved transactions with guys for people to go around gossiping about her or using her as social leverage. I think we all know of or participated in some gossip about very similar circumstances surrounding classmates. Honestly, the most unrealistic thing is that any of these guys flat-out asked for permission to use her in the first place -- usually its through the guise of love, affection, or partnership.
I see Olive as a people pleaser that struggles with setting boundaries. Because of the whole female sexuality being used as capital thing, I think women who struggle with setting boundaries are more vulnerable to being taken advantage of sexually, whether that's in actuality or just rumors as we see here. In this story, it seems like her self esteem plays a big part in this - without engaging in these self destructive people pleasing actions, she feels invisible. I also think it's sadly common for people pleasers to find themselves in unequal friendships where they don't feel safe to voice their true feelings. I do think that the support and acceptance she received from Todd and particularly her Mom may have helped bolster her confidence enough to finally state her truth in the end.
You hit the nail on the head. People either can or think they can take advantage of girls and women like that. Women are just preyed upon sexually more than boys/men and I think thats why this theme more applies to women.
This movie is the reason my daughter is named Olive. Although I do not want her to attempt this plot line in high school.
Haha fair!
@madiparker15 - I took a short story writing class once. One of mine was about a family crisis with a character named Olive. I didn't realize what it could mean until the instructor complimented me on that choice; he looked at it as survival - "Olive" as "I'll live". I took the compliment though I didn't deserve it, but I did learn a good lesson in fiction writing about the significance of name choices.
@@MossyMozart I love that! Or “Olive” that haha! I really love that it is a symbol or peace. I feel my Olive really embodies that . She is loving,respectful,hardworking and very much a peace maker!
I loved this episode. Would've been nice to also hear commentary on the manipulation tactics a lot of the characters did to get Olive to ultimately do what she want. Some were very aggressive, some were more subtle guilting tactics, some were through some type of gain. I've learned over the years how to spot it but definitely is easy to fall in these traps people lay.
I don't like to be touched without warning, even by people that I love and care for. The right people to live your life around are those who truly respect you. My husband asks for hug time so that I can be close to him when I choose to be. Its one of the things that I love most about him. Remember people, consent is sexy.
I'd like to add a note about consent in relationships broadly, and I LOVE that she talked about this.
Taking people for granted, imo, is one of the top insidious relationship destroyers. And the foundation of what taking people for granted is is actually just that you have gotten in the habit of assuming consent. You assume someone is "obligated", "supposed to", "they owe you", and using these relational pressures on someone is controlling and disrespectful. While it doesn't strip someone of their autonomy in the same way as something like a forced sexual act, there's a blatant disregard of the fact that as relationships grow more valuable, your ability to use them as leverage becomes stronger.
Consent doesn't need to be a literal "MAY I??" but ya know, things like "I'm gonna be going to the movies, you wanna come with?", just generally making your requests in a way that indicates if they say no, it's totally fine and they're not damaging your relationship by exercising their autonomy.
Sadly, I very much agree. My current relationship with my family is such that they're so used to ignoring or talking over me that they don't even notice themselves blowing through any boundaries I try setting; it's become a situation where I feel trapped and miserable, because I know I don't have the ability to have a say in my own life around them, but they have no idea what's going on because any time I try explaining this they tune me out or think I'm overreacting. I've literally become the alarm clock people snooze without waking up, and I can't force people to wake up and notice how they're shutting me down -- because of course any time I try they tune me out and shut me down. It's exhausting. I think I just need to be able to put enough physical space in between them and me that my boundaries will be literal physical boundaries that they can't cross in their sleep, so the only time I'll be around I'll have actively chosen to opt in.
Granted a lot of discussion of sexuality tend to pass me by, due to a systemic social expectation that autistic people (and other people with disabilities) don't have sexuality and tend to avoid these kind of films as I have bad memories of high school from SA but its good that you talked about consent.
One thing I've always found strange is why people are interested in other people's sex lives; I've seen different explanations presented ranging from Evolution to Capitalism to The Authoritarian Personality to Puritanism to Sexual Liberation Anxiety to countless others but never have any of them made that much sense to me.
Why would a human be feeling the need to concern themselves with the sexual activities of another human they aren't connected to?
As a fellow friend on the spectrum, i relate so much. I never understood why, growing up, people cared SO much about otehrs sex lives. Especially in highschool, i always thought "well people are bound to be having sex, but plenty arent. why would i care?" But unfortunately for us, not everyone sees the world that way, and not everyone has the same resources and education about sex, but it still annoys me. Like, mind your own business 😂
@@heehoopeanut420 Thanks for being kind and understanding, hopefully there will be more resources and education about sex (and less social stigma about asking). While I've been fortunate in having a family who understand and don't think sex (or the lack of it) and sexuality should be taboo or stigmatized its sad that this is not always the case.
I so related to the scene where an educator, a supposed grownup is oversharing with a student like they are a peer and not a child. That was me, getting trauma dumped on by teachers and staff or being confided in about things they should not be sharing. Olive is the grownup in that scene and that was me in high school and it was exhausting.
Yep, always being there for other people and no one is there for you. Thats way too much for a kid to handle.
I really like Olive's teacher. He didn't get enough mention in this episode, (probably because he wasn't a part of the theme of this video).
He knew Olive well enough to know that *something* was going on with her, it wasn't what everyone said, and that Olive was not okay.
The accelerated velocity of terminological inexactitude basically means the study of how fast, false rumours spread in a certain amount of time...
Or, as she said, "lies travel fast."
I have that phrase memorized in case I need it to sound smart. I have that and antidisestablishmentarianism in my "I want to sound smart" part of my brain
I love the editor(s) being the truest of dank memesters and making the crossover scene happen 😂
Editor was like "Why leave it up to the fans? I gotchu"
Wow, thank you for this. You know I have this friend who’s always pushing me to ‘participate’ by inviting me to things I don’t want to do (like going to a wine tasting when I don’t drink). Cause the minute I decline she find five reasons I should say yes until I find myself lying, and I’m a bad liar and she knows it and it always seems to end in a shaming. For some reason I have never thought of this as her invalidating my no. Maybe we have such trouble with consent inside of sex because we don’t understand it outside of sex. I think my friend and I need a longer talk
I find that the sentence "No." works really well with people like that, especially when you repeat it until they give up (generally in disgust or annoyance).
You have no need to lie to her when the truth would work just fine, and is less stressful to remember & remind people of.
And one of the last things I would ever want to do, even if it was an "encouraged" work thing, would be going to a wine tasting, because like you I don't drink. If she needs a wing woman, she should have at least 1 other friend that does drink.
Oh, wow. That’s a crappy friend to put you into positions you aren’t comfortable knowing you don’t drink. It’s different to go to a party or event & choose not to drink. A sober chick going to a wine tasting sounds like a bad joke. Lol.
Do you DD for her? Maybe that’s why she’s pushing you into going with her to drinking activities. She could be using you.
It’s really that we live in a world that hears ‘no’ and thinks that means ‘convince me’
No means no, period -- and not just in relation to sex. I've found that it's a waste of time and breath to explain to certain people, just easier to say no and move along.
"Doing the the wrong thing for the right reasons" is one of the most succinct descriptions of the human condition I've heard said anywhere.
I think it's quite interesting that Olive ends up with Todd, a guy who has his own vibe and does not care too much about what other people are doing(compared to Olive). He was a cool guy to her before and after the scandal, which shows his integrity and genuineness.
Also, I still laugh at the rally scene where he is a woodchuck😂
My neighbour does the forced/manipulative hang out thing. "I'm making you dinner!" "Let's go for a walk!" And it seems friendly, but its so manipulative. I've finally gotten up the courage to say no and its been great. Partly because when we have spent time together, she spends the entire time criticizing me and is extremely out of touch with the reality for young folks these days. She's the worst.
This movie is just so fun .should be just as celebrated as " mean girls " in my opinion
I sooooo love her take on consent!! So important! I want everybody in the world to learn this!!!!
Yes!!
Boys lies put me in danger a lot growing up. Makes people think they can treat you any way just because some boy says he slept with you. This movie meant a lot to me growing up and helped me understand what was happening to me 😂😂
A virtue can be a vice if followed to the extreme. Needed to hear that.
Love this channel
i had just watched the cruella video and came to this one. emma is such such a great actress and you are such a great team. this channel always makes me happy and it's my focus-entertainment source (and kind of hyperfixation too) while i design, cook or do anything. i love you guys so much!!!
Thanks for watching! :)
Olive is an extremely good person who had to learn you first have to be good to yourself. None of her relationships (outside of her family) was doing anything for her. Todd was the first to be as kind to her as she was to everyone else.
I've never seen this movie, so I don't know who that boy at the end was or what other things he'd done up to that point in the story. But when she told him she wanted her first kiss with him to be perfect, movies have conditioned me to expect that he was going to say something like "just being with you is perfect" and then just kiss her, and that the movie would treat it like he did a romantic and good thing. I felt genuine, actual relief when instead he just accepted her boundary and let it go. I need to watch this movie. (Well, it's got Emma Stone and Lisa Kudrow in it, so I need to watch it anyway, but still.)
This movie is awesome and you need to watch it *faster*
One of my absolute favourite channels ❤ you guys should really do villain therapy on President Snow from The Hunger Games, especially now his origin story has come out!!
You guys should do Katniss and Peeta from The Hunger Games if you haven’t already! I would love to see that relationship! Love your videos ❤️
I am so happy y'all covered Easy A! Great movie. I was hoping to hear some more about the parental relationships and their sex neutral attitudes.
Yeah they are amazing parents in the movie! Do a whole episode on them please!
Or maybe an episode on sex neutral parents/ major characters in general 🤔
Maybe they'll make a video about good parenting with them? I would love that @CinemaTherapyShow
Movie Therapy made a video with Hannah Witton on Parenting in movies.
💯
Thank you for reviewing Easy A. It’s one of my favourite films
You're so welcome!
Easy A is one of thise movies you can just always quote. Such an instant classic. Also was wondering if you can do a video on the friendships in Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants?
I think an interesting thing that was skipped over is that women are societally trained to not have boundaries, and this movie is a lesson in why that isn’t okay.
Yes! The one thing her parents failed to do--teach her it's ok to say no.
This movie came out right after my class did our unit on the Scarlet Letter. We got extra credit for going to see it.
Aside from the sadly era-appropriate slut-shaming, I still loved this movie.
As an undiagnosed autistic weirdo in a tiny rural school, I was relentlessly bullied. Finally realizing in late middle school that people’s shitty opinions about me didn’t matter and being able to laugh along with them was one of the best things in my life. People can call me the most horrible things and make the worst threats - and they still do - and I can honestly say I don’t care. It’s freeing. 💓
Easy A is a movie I always come back to and can truly relate to. I went to an all boys high school and everyone was lying about having a girlfriend. As for myself, I wasn't ready to come out but I started to become aware that people's sexuality can be both a power and weapon; for better or worse.
I still to this day question why my friends and old classmates were all microscoped for our sexual orientation, reputations and whether or not we were virgins.
Damned if we do, damned if we don't.
The scene with Lisa Kudrow's counselor hugging Olive is not "tender." Good grief, y'all. That's an educator sexually exploiting a minor and a student. It's horrendous. 😂
It would cool to see you guys do an episode on the Before Trilogy and explore how love changes over time as people change and the different stages of love with a partner as you both grow into different people.
Emma Stone is obviously incredible, but this movie was one of the nails in the coffin for me about Stanley Tucci. Been a massive fan ever since, of both
This may seem random but i really hope they do surfs up one of these days. The psycology of ambition and success vs happiness and spirituality presented in Cody and Big Z’s relationship would be SO interesting to get into. Also the fact that that movie is not only documentary style, making it a mockumentary, which is a whole cake to cut into filmaking wise itself but its an ANIMATED mockumentary, COMBINED with being highly influenced by real athletes journeys and athlete documentaries. The way they filmed it is so interesting i love it. Plus its just SO FUNNY.
yessssss
I love surf's up!
I remember one boy lying about sleeping with my friend in order to conceal his sexuality. He was gay & didn’t want anyone to know. We didn’t realize that until many years later, but my friend was really hurt by his actions at the time.
I'm all about the hugs between romantic partners when they could do something more. Like one of my favorite displays of this was when Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy in the early 2000s film press their foreheads together at sunrise instead of kissing. So much more intimacy in that then if they'd kissed.
He was also the first one who accepted her answer and didnt guilt trip her into doing something she didnt want to. He respected her. The other people made her feel bad or threaten her when she said no and he did not. He just let her know that it's okay no worries. I'm here for you if you need me.
Please make a video about the movie A Man Called Otto.
The great storyteller (Narnia) and Christian writer C. S. Lewis wrote once to remember "... male and female God created them, in God's own image ..." Male and Female.
Lewis also wrote that all sex, no matter how misused it was, was a way of getting back to that united godhood, male AND female.
He wrote about this much better than I'm saying here.
Love this movie and that last part about consent in all engagement instead of just sexual is a very interesting idea
The way you can quote this movie word for word. Impeccable taste.
It would be really fun to see a Hero breakdown of “Hamilton” and his endless quest for legacy v living in the moment and appreciation for what you have 👀
Just an idea
7:57 this moment hits so hard as someone who used to regularly pity-fuck anyone who tripped my empathy button - Olive calls out his attitude as "repugnant" and his first instinct is to glance at his body, interpret the comment as an entirely physical one. It's that same logic gap that we see in so many incels/nice guys, where they are convinced that they're un-fuckable mainly because of their looks, rather than their misogyny and entitlement.
Well said.
"I'm adopted."
"Oh my God. WHO TOLD YOU?!"
This lives rent free in my head.
You guys are great. I really love your channel.
I disagree with certain things on this channel concerning sexuality, but I agree completely with the whole consent thing. Someone dear to me was sexually abused and it can be really hard for them when it comes to intimacy at times, at which point I'm learning about asking. People tend to idealize that you're in a relationship when you can read the other person's mind and know when to hug, kiss or have sexual intimacy with them. While you can pick up on habits and signs along the way - that is pure B.S. asking a question is how you win a woman's heart. I think of it as my relationship with God. God won't force me to love Him, that's my choice entirely and that's why we have a relationship because the love is freely given.
Stanley Tucci is so good in this movie
"Who told you!?!?"
He great in every movie he's in
@@bellaknightR597 facts
Watching Home Alone 2 after Home Alone 1 yesterday. I'd love to see a psychological breakdown of the McCallisters. Rewatching the movies as an adult and as an associate Therapist, there's some stuff to unpack there lol
That thumbnail just makes me think of a quote I use in my life "Being selfless for selfish reasons."
The consent convo in the car about the kiss is obe of my altime faves. Because so often convos around consent in media or life in general is like, yes you can kiss, or no you cant kiss because i dont want to.
In that scene Liv makes it very clear she WANTS to kiss him, but shes so emotionally upset at that moment over other things she wouldnt enjoy the kiss or find confort in it in that monent. But she does say yes to a hug. It shows that even when attraction and desire in present between 2 people, the context can impact whether the answer to the consent question will be a yes
6:30 that book sounds good. If I get into reading, I’ll check them out. And ty for another great episode, and giving me a new TH-camr to binge. On another note, please do Yes God Yes. It’s a movie about a teenage girl who’s struggling with being true to herself and her sexuality and having a good relationship with God/believing in her faith, and it’s so good.
22:25 so true. That sucks
This is the first time I heard of Hannah Wilton and I am interested in what can she do or say about Asmodeus from Helluva Boss already. Sadly, that most likely not going never happened.
Also, I cannot believed it's Emma Stone of all people! I mean, yeah! She went from Gwen Stacy to Cruella de Vil is already saying something but this?! Oh my! She is such an amazing actress!
This video arrived at the best moment, at the end of a very long day and it's time to relax. Thank you Alan and Jono!
Our pleasure!
I'm sorry, I snickered like the typical adult I am when she said " _It's about people coming together_ " 😁😊
I legitimated hated school. I've always been the kind of person who lives my own life. For doing that, you get talked behind your back a lot because you aren't trying to be pleasing to everyone else nor are you trying to be something you're not. I think that makes a lot of people jealous who always felt like they had to be something they were not. But then again, the setback for me was a stifled experience with people and lifetime of loathing for humankind.
This was such a love letter to 80s John Hughes era of movies and put Emma Stone on my radar ❤
The gates of Hell I had to pass through was Elementary school. Endless bullying and being put into ESL class. After going through that: Middle School and High School were cake walks. College was another Hell before entering Adulthood.
Ahh this is the collab i’ve been waiting for! I first heard about you guys from one of Hannah’s vlogs several years ago. It’s now gone full circle! ❤️
I can see skipping the assault scene to avoid triggering content, but I’m surprised there was no reference to it when talking about consent in all situations. That scene is an extreme example of how consent is assumed according to the roles assigned to us by others. Sex workers can refuse to have sex. Marriage doesn’t guarantee consent, and dating doesn’t lock it in either. If you don’t like your older brother ruffling your hair, you don’t have to put up with it because you’re the younger sibling and he’s just being affectionate. (Growing up with long, curly hair, I had to put up with complete strangers touching my hair in public, actually petting me like a cat or dog.) You don’t have to accept physical affection from any member of your family because that’s what’s considered normal. If you find yourself excusing behavior you don’t like because you feel obligated to do so in your role, try to rewrite that part of the script, and if anyone in your life repeatedly ignores boundaries you try to set, you aren’t safe. Acknowledge your circumstances and seek help if you need it.
You have no idea how long I've waited for this ever since Hannah spoiled about it in one of her videos
Never would've thought I'd live to see two of my favorite TH-camrs collaborate and yet here it is!!!
I had a crush on Emma Stone when I saw this for the first time in the theatre during high school senior year. Watching her tell off a guy named Evan made 18-year-old me feel called out. Upon repeat viewings, the whole film became inspiration for me to treat girls better as I grew up.
Thanks for the great work you guys do!
Hurray! Cinema Therapy! And this video looks like it's going to showcase something very important.
This movie is just a sleeper hit
The actors in this absolutely killed, both the main, and the supporting actors outdid themselves, and the parents are so delightfully amazing!
I love your editor, they actually went and added the zoro scene in there 😂
My best friend set me up on a blind date and it was a bad date. Not to long after that, my date went to public and braged about having sex with me. I didn't have sex with him , we didn't even kiss. My best friend lied about being my friend and denied about setting up the date. The lie was suppose to be this guys entrance into manhood, but became my nightmare. I got kicked out of clubs, no one wanted to be caught spending time with me. The males at my church slut shamed me. Eventually I ended my membership to the church and changed schools. 3 years later I went to a grill and ran into the minister's daughter from the church. As soon as she saw me, she went to every member of the party and told everyone that I'm a slut. She was very proud of herself for it. I left early and cried.
21:24 I love how Johnathan corrected Hannah, it was very respectful and as an ex-people-pleaser who doesn’t have much practice correcting people, it’s nice to see an example of how to correct someone without making it a big deal.
The reason I hate this movie so much is it’s depiction of christians. ALL of the christians in this movie are stereotypes, and you can tell the writers knew nothing about modern Christianity. Yeah, I get it, it’s a spin on The Scarlet Letter, but it’s different in the book. It’s meant to mirror the hypocrisy of Puritans, but here, the main mean girl is a modern Protestant. If she was truly like that, her family would have sent her to a private school if her whole life really did revolve around God. In the book, Olive is STILL a christian, and knows what she did is wrong, but still loves her daughter. If you’re going to adapt such a complex story into a modern comedy, do it right.
Oh my God! My two worlds collide!!! Amazing collaboration choice!!!!!!!!!!🤩🤩
I agree!
I particularly hated the part with the counselor ... I've known too many teachers who are indeed willing to throw students under the bus.
Retired school librarian
P.S. Knew two girls in high school known as "sluts". They always looked lonely and kind of defenseless.
I love it when you guys have virtual guests on the show, because then we get to see you wearing earpieces like bodyguards or secret service men XD
Gosh, I had such a girl-crush on Emma Stone after this film. She's just so pretty and sarcastic and genuine. I can't say I identified much with it; I don't live in the US so the whole high-school experience over there is 100% a movie thing for me. This film was also my first chance seeing Stanly Tucci, who was so much fun.
Side note: I dreamt last night that you'd made a "Therapist Ranks top 5 Mentors" episode. It had Gandalf, Dumbledore, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and 2 others I can't recall. What are the chances of that ever happening? :)
i love the important talk we are haveing till she said that one...damn my dirty mind! 9:52
Two of my all time favourite channels, love this collab ❤
Thanks for watching! :)
I just wish this was a college movie instead of high school. i am really tired of teenagers being sexualized.
It wouldn't be realistic because people aren't this judgemental in college, I feel like college students are more mature than this
@@bellaknightR597 i don't care if it isn't realistic. we don't need to be seeing this stuff about teenagers.
@@shaobues right because teenagers definitely never think about sex ever. Ever. Obviously.
@@bellaknightR597I know they do. I did it. But that doesn't mean we need to show it on TV and make it look attractive.
@@bellaknightR597it might be even more realistic if it was in college because they're adults who can have sex without legal problems.
22:49 the idea of a non-consensual friendship is a big deal cause people don't think of it like that.
I love this movie! Thank you for reviewing it.
You're so welcome!