All of this connected with me. I’m sitting here on the verge of tears. I so desperately want love and to be connected to others, but it’s terrifying. I thought I had a good best friend and then she bailed on me when she was no longer the center of attention. I want to trust myself. I keep making bad choices in the people I let into my life. All I want is to be accepted, yet I can’t even accept myself. Sigh. These trauma wounds run so deep.
7 Signs Someone Has Rejection Sensitivity (1/24/2025)
Julia, this is a GREAT video! I am always learning something new from you. I never knew about Rejection Sensitivity, and I find it very relatable. One of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned from you is that when I discover something about myself, like being a highly sensitive person or having rejection sensitivity, it doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with me. The first step is to NOT reject myself because I may be more sensitive in these areas. Now, I understand why I have been so sensitive to rejection. I have this new awareness, and I can show myself compassion. 💞 Also, since I have done so much internal healing work in my life as a Shifter, I can see where I have made progress and where some work still needs to be done. I think for a long time, sign number 5 has held me back. But now, I realize that as long as I start putting myself out there, even if I still face rejection, I will be okay. I am STILL a worthy and valued person. I love and accept myself just as I am. Here are my notes:
* Rejection Sensitivity: An intense sense of rejection that leads to sadness, anger lack of acceptance. HSPs are more prone to this. * It can cause you to question your self-worth.
7 Signs: 1. A crisis of confidence - After being shut down, or not get the desirable outcome a person hoped for from others, they question their value and self-worth.
2. Any rejection (even small one, or perception) can bring up an intense emotional reaction - a person may lash out in anger, or go internally reject others. A bigger rejection, like not getting a job or break up can unleash even more intense emotions.
3. Even if someone lets a person down easily or gently, they still go into self-blame or blaming others- "You had a great idea, but I think we are going into a different direction…" can still cause intense emotions and thoughts of unworthiness.
4. If someone gets caught up in people pleasing - Rejection sensitivity is often a driver in people pleasing. They want to be how people want or do what people want even it costs their own happiness, boundaries, preferences or health. If they don't, they fear rejection.
5. People tend to avoid any kind of circumstances that is going to make you vulnerable to rejection in the first place - you avoid putting yourself out there in case you do it wrong and fear being rejected. You fear you don't have what it takes to be the best. Avoid getting close to people so that they won't reject you.
6. A deep drive for perfection - Perfectionism is rooted in anxiety and fear. If a person thinks they do not have everything "right" or "all together" then no one can criticize them or look down on them and ultimately reject them.
7. Someone may go though some or most of their life with a negative filter - they may think that somehow if someone glances at them or give them a look or someone says something neutral and perceive it as rejection.
* If we don't let others in, we don't get connection or authentic connection. We don’t' feel loved or accepted.
* HARD TRUTH: If you want to stop fearing the rection of others and taking it so hard, then you got to STOP rejection yourself! You have to start loving and liking yourself for who you are!*
This video is spot on for me. I am surprised on how there is so much wisdom and understanding available on TH-cam. I also didn’t connect perfectionism to rejection. I am learning that I am more sensitive than I ever thought. Thanks for the video. I subscribed to your channel.
I deal with this everyday. It is tied in fear of trying things because I’ll fail . It is also tied in with OCD to make sure that I don’t screw up . I only let certain friends in , ones I think will not criticize me . The thing I do to get praise , that I feel will get me acceptance is singing . But even then , I feel It has got to come off right or I am unacceptable . My Friends I know care about me , don’t know these feelings I have . I also get hugs for acceptance , to feel safe .
Thank you, Julia! I feel this when I have an idea and present it and it is totally ignored. I have to a lot of self talk and examine my “assumptions” or “stories” I build around the situation. Also, I have to constantly remind myself not to take everything personally. (As per the Four Agreements). But it’s not a “one and done”. I have to do this every time. One day, perhaps I will do this immediately, in the moment, and not go into sensitivity rejection. ❤
Excellent video which is very applicable for me right now. After my husband passed a year ago, many friends 'disappeared'. So now it's difficult to trust ppl and to open up. It will take time to reach out and make new friends ❤
Thank you for your channel. Yes! I've struggled with this my whole life as someone who is highly sensitive. Makes so much sense, that I feel things more deeply than others... rsd, people pleasing and shame. Trying to be more gentle with myself.
I’m convinced I’m struggling with Anhedonia. I can’t feel pleasure or reward in anything. I get positive affirmations, compliments and gifts from people and I feel absolutely nothing. The least little rejection or criticism cuts me deep and can get me to feeling down for a day or weeks sometimes. I’m sure a lot of this comes from going through a narcissistic relationship with my ex wife and other relationships where I was treated poorly and rejected unexpectedly.
i know this is kinda off-topic, but i kept seeing comments about Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki in videos like this, and i finally decided to read it. honestly, it’s one of those books where you don’t realize how much it’s helping until you start noticing people treating you differently. it’s like the book shows you how to unlock a version of yourself you didn’t even know was there. subtle, but so effective.
Whenever I detect a hint of rejection, I immediately see myself out. I’ll strike out potential friends and family. I’ve walked away from a lot of opportunities.
You know this happens to me when I’m talking with a group of family or friends, and I make a random statement and nobody responds to it, it feels like it drains me because nobody responded so why did I even bother
this might be a bit unrelated, but i kept seeing Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki popping up in comments everywhere, so i decided to check it out. the book’s all about working on your energy and presence, and it’s way more practical than i expected. after applying what it teaches, i’ve noticed people are more drawn to me, and i feel more confident without trying too hard. it’s been such a low-key but powerful shift
i know this isn’t really about the video, but has anyone else seen people talking about the book Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki? i finally gave in after seeing it everywhere, and i can see why people keep bringing it up. it’s super practical and teaches you how to strengthen your presence in a way that feels authentic. i didn’t think something like this would work, but i’ve definitely noticed how people interact with me differently now-it’s like they’re drawn to me without me trying.
All of this connected with me. I’m sitting here on the verge of tears. I so desperately want love and to be connected to others, but it’s terrifying. I thought I had a good best friend and then she bailed on me when she was no longer the center of attention. I want to trust myself. I keep making bad choices in the people I let into my life. All I want is to be accepted, yet I can’t even accept myself. Sigh. These trauma wounds run so deep.
I can relate to all of this!!! We have to love ourselves first though and it takes time, it’s a lot of work, but it will pay off in the end. ❤
Never realized my entire freaking life could be condensed into such a short video 🤣 both relatable & depressing
What connected with me is hearing, that perfectionism is as well a defence against rejection. Thank you Julia for the wonderful video!
My thoughts and notes on Julia’s TH-cam video,
7 Signs Someone Has Rejection Sensitivity (1/24/2025)
Julia, this is a GREAT video! I am always learning something new from you. I never knew about Rejection Sensitivity, and I find it very relatable.
One of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned from you is that when I discover something about myself, like being a highly sensitive person or having rejection sensitivity, it doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with me. The first step is to NOT reject myself because I may be more sensitive in these areas. Now, I understand why I have been so sensitive to rejection. I have this new awareness, and I can show myself compassion. 💞
Also, since I have done so much internal healing work in my life as a Shifter, I can see where I have made progress and where some work still needs to be done. I think for a long time, sign number 5 has held me back. But now, I realize that as long as I start putting myself out there, even if I still face rejection, I will be okay. I am STILL a worthy and valued person. I love and accept myself just as I am.
Here are my notes:
* Rejection Sensitivity: An intense sense of rejection that leads to sadness, anger lack of acceptance. HSPs are more prone to this.
* It can cause you to question your self-worth.
7 Signs:
1. A crisis of confidence - After being shut down, or not get the desirable outcome a person hoped for from others, they question their value and self-worth.
2. Any rejection (even small one, or perception) can bring up an intense emotional reaction - a person may lash out in anger, or go internally reject others. A bigger rejection, like not getting a job or break up can unleash even more intense emotions.
3. Even if someone lets a person down easily or gently, they still go into self-blame or blaming others- "You had a great idea, but I think we are going into a different direction…" can still cause intense emotions and thoughts of unworthiness.
4. If someone gets caught up in people pleasing - Rejection sensitivity is often a driver in people pleasing. They want to be how people want or do what people want even it costs their own happiness, boundaries, preferences or health. If they don't, they fear rejection.
5. People tend to avoid any kind of circumstances that is going to make you vulnerable to rejection in the first place - you avoid putting yourself out there in case you do it wrong and fear being rejected. You fear you don't have what it takes to be the best. Avoid getting close to people so that they won't reject you.
6. A deep drive for perfection - Perfectionism is rooted in anxiety and fear. If a person thinks they do not have everything "right" or "all together" then no one can criticize them or look down on them and ultimately reject them.
7. Someone may go though some or most of their life with a negative filter - they may think that somehow if someone glances at them or give them a look or someone says something neutral and perceive it as rejection.
* If we don't let others in, we don't get connection or authentic connection. We don’t' feel loved or accepted.
* HARD TRUTH: If you want to stop fearing the rection of others and taking it so hard, then you got to STOP rejection yourself! You have to start loving and liking yourself for who you are!*
This video is spot on for me. I am surprised on how there is so much wisdom and understanding available on TH-cam. I also didn’t connect perfectionism to rejection. I am learning that I am more sensitive than I ever thought. Thanks for the video. I subscribed to your channel.
I deal with this everyday. It is tied in fear of trying things because I’ll fail . It is also tied in with OCD to make sure that I don’t screw up . I only let certain friends in , ones I think will not criticize me . The thing I do to get praise , that I feel will get me acceptance is singing . But even then , I feel It has got to come off right or I am unacceptable . My Friends I know care about me , don’t know these feelings I have . I also get hugs for acceptance , to feel safe .
Thank you, Julia! I feel this when I have an idea and present it and it is totally ignored. I have to a lot of self talk and examine my “assumptions” or “stories” I build around the situation. Also, I have to constantly remind myself not to take everything personally. (As per the Four Agreements). But it’s not a “one and done”. I have to do this every time. One day, perhaps I will do this immediately, in the moment, and not go into sensitivity rejection. ❤
Thank you, you are a blessing.
Excellent video which is very applicable for me right now. After my husband passed a year ago, many friends 'disappeared'. So now it's difficult to trust ppl and to open up. It will take time to reach out and make new friends ❤
Thank you for your channel. Yes! I've struggled with this my whole life as someone who is highly sensitive. Makes so much sense, that I feel things more deeply than others... rsd, people pleasing and shame. Trying to be more gentle with myself.
How does my phone read my mind? Suggested videos freak me out, but they not wrong
I’m convinced I’m struggling with Anhedonia. I can’t feel pleasure or reward in anything. I get positive affirmations, compliments and gifts from people and I feel absolutely nothing. The least little rejection or criticism cuts me deep and can get me to feeling down for a day or weeks sometimes. I’m sure a lot of this comes from going through a narcissistic relationship with my ex wife and other relationships where I was treated poorly and rejected unexpectedly.
Thank you 🎉
Brilliant content! This very much resonated. Thank you.
Please make video on criticism sensitivity
i know this is kinda off-topic, but i kept seeing comments about Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki in videos like this, and i finally decided to read it. honestly, it’s one of those books where you don’t realize how much it’s helping until you start noticing people treating you differently. it’s like the book shows you how to unlock a version of yourself you didn’t even know was there. subtle, but so effective.
Spot on......
Whenever I detect a hint of rejection, I immediately see myself out. I’ll strike out potential friends and family. I’ve walked away from a lot of opportunities.
Most of them. My family has always made fun of me for being too sensitive about everything.
You know this happens to me when I’m talking with a group of family or friends, and I make a random statement and nobody responds to it, it feels like it drains me because nobody responded so why did I even bother
I feel in invisible a lot of times
How to cope when you’re married to someone who is rejection sensitive? I feel this never ending pressure to make up for what is missing. But I can’t.
this might be a bit unrelated, but i kept seeing Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki popping up in comments everywhere, so i decided to check it out. the book’s all about working on your energy and presence, and it’s way more practical than i expected. after applying what it teaches, i’ve noticed people are more drawn to me, and i feel more confident without trying too hard. it’s been such a low-key but powerful shift
Me, me, me😅 Thank you 🙏
meeeeee even when a streamer dissappears for a day
i know this isn’t really about the video, but has anyone else seen people talking about the book Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki? i finally gave in after seeing it everywhere, and i can see why people keep bringing it up. it’s super practical and teaches you how to strengthen your presence in a way that feels authentic. i didn’t think something like this would work, but i’ve definitely noticed how people interact with me differently now-it’s like they’re drawn to me without me trying.
Julia, you are so beautiful!! ✨🥹💫 Inside and out, you simply GLOW. Thank you for sharing these wise words. I really needed to hear this today✨