My family did not communicate at all. We had to pretend that everything was fine. I was also taught that women had no value and that we couldn't make it in the world without a man. I have been on my own a long time now...but I do struggle financially.
You're therapy is so excellent. I'm 47 & experiencing the best relationship of my life using these principles. Self examination & self love is so empowering. For the first time I'm setting boundaries & letting go in a safe way. Thank you.
I don't have a role model for love and intimacy. My mom was a coward always looking for validation from an unavailable man (schizo) didn't have the courage to leave him. Im angry at both of them for the life we had with my sisters. Everything was unhealthy about their relationship.
Thank you so much, Terri, for another wonderful video! The fact you share your own story in such an open & honest way, makes me appreciate you even more. Your videos are excellent and they open my eyes and touch my heart. Keep it up, God bless you!
Wow ! Have to express you how I love your videos :-) Everytime i´m overthrone by your words : they are always on point and are simply going through. Keep sharing your love as you do and take care of yourself too :-)
xoxoxo😘😘 and if you still are living on the east coast (am in morristown, NJ tho grew up in so cal) i'd love to be coached by you live. Definitely want to enroll in your next program..you're the best:)
My problem in my relationships are insecurity, jealousy and paranoia. I'm ruining my relationship with my boyfriend because of this. it's really upsetting us both and I feel like im losing him. It really doesn't help that I suffer from clinical depression :-( I can definitely relate to this video.
thanks for your honest comment, Rosetta. Getting into therapy to get to the bottom of your insecurities might really benefit you and your relationship. Wishing you the best. xo
Why am I just now finding you??? I've been on YT for *years* and this is the first video of yours that is coming up in my feed!! DARN YOU, TH-cam!!! ugh
Thank you for doing these videos for us. I won't give up on love but you have helped me understand why I have chosen LDR relationships even though at one point I was married but that I left to bc it was not healthy. but since I realize so much in the last couple weeks from watching your videos and I really hope that I can start to attract quality cute and good men locally vs 1000s of miles away.
I fully understand. I Am Still Learning to manage myself. being the lady, being the supporter. I am single raising 3 daughters. I want them to have healthy relationship. they see beautiful relationship around them. I want them to break the cycle. but I am showing them to be independent and be strong. but also, lean on your partner, let them support you, guide you and to bring you happiness as much as you can make yourself happy. I've only discovered you today and this has hit home.
My pattern is not similar to my parents' pattern. My mother is an unreasonable and stubborn person. My father was a peacemaker and felt it was his duty to keep it together. I attract men who abandon me and don't tell me why. I am 27 and wish I had a loving partner
You don't need to have their exact pattern. Can you dig deeper into your own pattern by asking the 3 questions about your past relationships? . Who does this person remind me of? 2. Where have I felt like this before? 3. Why is this dynamic familiar to me? This might help you understand what you're repeating. xo
And yes! I use to cry when I would see my parents use to fight! Cus he didn't understand money and kept wasting his money calling his family. She seperated from my dad then got divorcee it's weird how that is cus I grew up in Christian home. And they still fought!
Sorry if I offended you- it was not intentional. My straight male audience is growing so I will be more mindful. Thanks for being here and leaving a comment. I appreciate your feedback!
I think Beetelythings comment is very valid & your response to it is great. I love the video btw, it was such an eye-opener for me. One more request about this topic of biases, it would be lovely to also have lesbian/gay/bi orientations included (e.g. Are you a woman that is attracted to men or women that..../ are you a man that always dates women or men that are...). Thanks in advance
I had the worst example of positive role models in my Life . I have 36 years old and i 'm pretty hopeless about my romantic Life , i dont have one , prefer this way , i am happier
rejection /by bad boys /yes i become afraid /i say yes i am happy ,even though i wasnt i always repeat the old patterns because i really did like that person i always had to let the guy i always like go because of being married to somebody else i didnt feel love by my father him and my mother was separated when i was little
when I was a young girl hit was like that my mom traits my dad to leave so I was always knew insecure to be aandon And I guessed it never Left me .. please help me!!
i am married and not happy i married my husband because the guy i really like was always getting in other relationships my mother wanted me to married my husband not married the one i love i lost the guy i love to somebody else
My mother growing up was with my biological father for the first 7yrs of my life and he was a pedophile. Then when he left her, she dated men back to back who were all fresh out of jail and who had strong alcohol and drug addictions. I definitely didn't have a positive role model with her in general but especially when it came to romantic relationships. I've been single my whole life. Never been in a relationship and I'm 34. I've accepted I will be alone for the rest of my life and that's ok because I've always been fiercely independent.
I'm witnessing you with compassion and I'm sorry you grew up in that kind of environment. It's never too late to change if that's what you want. Other people's choices and your past situation do not have to dictate your future. If you want healthy love and be independent, it is possible.
Where can I observe healthy relationships? Are there meditations that walk you through using your imagination to experience/ observe healthy romantic connections ?
I have a few videos that might give you some ideas: 20 tips to healthy love: th-cam.com/video/dE2bf5orrag/w-d-xo.html 5 Foundational boundaries for epic relationships: th-cam.com/video/WhSJkshArt4/w-d-xo.html My top 4 verbs of epic love: th-cam.com/video/2GXfv4b1bD8/w-d-xo.html 4 Appreciation rituals for lasting love: th-cam.com/video/VdOTxgYPxgc/w-d-xo.html I usually include anecdotes from my own marriage ❤️ For meditations, I love Insight Timer and have many of my own meditations on there. Doing a search for "healthy love" brings up a number of results, so you could try there 💕
Could it be possible that both partners in a relationship could share, both being narcissistic and codependent? I´m asking cuz I watched you video "Why codependents and narcissists can´t break up", and was struck by how Us it is. Not reeally narc and codep, but we live in a family with kids with huge needs, thus putting our worst personallyties to play, while beeing passionately "in love" and both feeling realy bad. But the thing is that, I can´t say that neither me or my whife are "bad" persons, we both do lots of good things, but unfortunately also the opposite. And we just can´t quit although we have tried, it´s almost like a drug. Thanx for great videos.
Help me understand my pattern. my dad is a total a-hole and my mom is the sweet and caring one who's always trying to save the relationship. I tend to attract broken women with trouble pasts and relationships then leave me months in the relationship
Hello, I hope you don't mind sharing with you an idea that to me looks as you repeat how your mom behaved, maybe you are overly nice and don't have any boundaries so you attract personality type as your father used to be. I wish you all the best. :) Maybe balanced approach would be helpful, learning to be nice but being able to say ,,no" from time to time and also making some kind of expectation from another person can help too, you don't have to do everything by yourself in relationship :)
![fellow fellow - PROUD feat. INK WARUNTORN [STRING QUARTET]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/BQrVkMPTdHE/mqdefault.jpg)
My family did not communicate at all. We had to pretend that everything was fine. I was also taught that women had no value and that we couldn't make it in the world without a man. I have been on my own a long time now...but I do struggle financially.
Hey Same here
I was always taught I always used to overthink things and that nothing excites me
“the petty and small ways that we make each other wrong” ...so true! thank you for pointing out this very important part ❤️
You're welcome! Glad to hear it resonated.
You're therapy is so excellent. I'm 47 & experiencing the best relationship of my life using these principles. Self examination & self love is so empowering. For the first time I'm setting boundaries & letting go in a safe way. Thank you.
Right ON! So happy to hear it!!!
I don't have a role model for love and intimacy. My mom was a coward always looking for validation from an unavailable man (schizo) didn't have the courage to leave him. Im angry at both of them for the life we had with my sisters. Everything was unhealthy about their relationship.
Thank you so much, Terri, for another wonderful video! The fact you share your own story in such an open & honest way, makes me appreciate you even more. Your videos are excellent and they open my eyes and touch my heart. Keep it up, God bless you!
Wow ! Have to express you how I love your videos :-) Everytime i´m overthrone by your words : they are always on point and are simply going through. Keep sharing your love as you do and take care of yourself too :-)
Thank you so much! Thanks for the self love reminder too
i absolutely adore you, Terri, keep the videos coming please! my blue print was awful. I now have a clean slate after 8 years with a narcissist.
Right on Margaret!!! This makes me so happy. thank you for sharing mama! xo
xoxoxo😘😘 and if you still are living on the east coast (am in morristown, NJ tho grew up in so cal) i'd love to be coached by you live. Definitely want to enroll in your next program..you're the best:)
love you're hair
My problem in my relationships are insecurity, jealousy and paranoia. I'm ruining my relationship with my boyfriend because of this. it's really upsetting us both and I feel like im losing him. It really doesn't help that I suffer from clinical depression :-(
I can definitely relate to this video.
thanks for your honest comment, Rosetta. Getting into therapy to get to the bottom of your insecurities might really benefit you and your relationship. Wishing you the best. xo
❤️
Why am I just now finding you??? I've been on YT for *years* and this is the first video of yours that is coming up in my feed!! DARN YOU, TH-cam!!! ugh
I am happy you found your way here ❤️
Thank you for doing these videos for us. I won't give up on love but you have helped me understand why I have chosen LDR relationships even though at one point I was married but that I left to bc it was not healthy. but since I realize so much in the last couple weeks from watching your videos and I really hope that I can start to attract quality cute and good men locally vs 1000s of miles away.
I am cheering you on Becca! The more you understand yourself the easier it will be to attract healthy potential partners. xo
Thank you SOO much Terri!! :) :) xo
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ love you Terri
I fully understand. I Am Still Learning to manage myself. being the lady, being the supporter. I am single raising 3 daughters. I want them to have healthy relationship. they see beautiful relationship around them. I want them to break the cycle. but I am showing them to be independent and be strong. but also, lean on your partner, let them support you, guide you and to bring you happiness as much as you can make yourself happy.
I've only discovered you today and this has hit home.
My pattern is not similar to my parents' pattern. My mother is an unreasonable and stubborn person. My father was a peacemaker and felt it was his duty to keep it together. I attract men who abandon me and don't tell me why. I am 27 and wish I had a loving partner
You don't need to have their exact pattern. Can you dig deeper into your own pattern by asking the 3 questions about your past relationships? . Who does this person remind me of? 2. Where have I felt like this before? 3. Why is this dynamic familiar to me? This might help you understand what you're repeating. xo
Terri Cole Real Love Revolution hmm okay time to dive into these questions.. thanks
THANK YOU SO MUCH TERRI
You are very welcome!
Thank u Terri love u very much
And yes! I use to cry when I would see my parents use to fight! Cus he didn't understand money and kept wasting his money calling his family. She seperated from my dad then got divorcee it's weird how that is cus I grew up in Christian home. And they still fought!
You look great. Thanks for your videos
i am going to be sad until i die it is hard to believe i am not dead
Need to stop the female bias. Did he / was he etc etc. I’m a he & I’m watching this to understand and be educated and I’m not gay ;).
Sorry if I offended you- it was not intentional. My straight male audience is growing so I will be more mindful. Thanks for being here and leaving a comment. I appreciate your feedback!
Terri Cole Real Love Revolution not offended. Thanks for the videos
I think Beetelythings comment is very valid & your response to it is great. I love the video btw, it was such an eye-opener for me. One more request about this topic of biases, it would be lovely to also have lesbian/gay/bi orientations included (e.g. Are you a woman that is attracted to men or women that..../ are you a man that always dates women or men that are...). Thanks in advance
I had the worst example of positive role models in my Life . I have 36 years old and i 'm pretty hopeless about my romantic Life , i dont have one , prefer this way , i am happier
rejection /by bad boys /yes i become afraid /i say yes i am happy ,even though i wasnt i always repeat the old patterns because i really did like that person i always had to let the guy i always like go because of being married to somebody else i didnt feel love by my father him and my mother was separated when i was little
My father was abusive and unavailable and have addictions the thread has been egoistic people
i didnt had a good relation role model my grand mother and my mother made me think i was never good enough
it is to late for me to find true love i am married will never find true love
when I was a young girl hit was like that my mom traits my dad to leave so I was always knew insecure to be aandon And I guessed it never Left me .. please help me!!
Keep watching education and inspiration videos to learn more about how to heal. Don't give up!
i am married and not happy i married my husband because the guy i really like was always getting in other relationships my mother wanted me to married my husband not married the one i love i lost the guy i love to somebody else
My mother growing up was with my biological father for the first 7yrs of my life and he was a pedophile. Then when he left her, she dated men back to back who were all fresh out of jail and who had strong alcohol and drug addictions. I definitely didn't have a positive role model with her in general but especially when it came to romantic relationships. I've been single my whole life. Never been in a relationship and I'm 34. I've accepted I will be alone for the rest of my life and that's ok because I've always been fiercely independent.
I'm witnessing you with compassion and I'm sorry you grew up in that kind of environment. It's never too late to change if that's what you want. Other people's choices and your past situation do not have to dictate your future. If you want healthy love and be independent, it is possible.
Where can I observe healthy relationships? Are there meditations that walk you through using your imagination to experience/ observe healthy romantic connections ?
I have a few videos that might give you some ideas:
20 tips to healthy love: th-cam.com/video/dE2bf5orrag/w-d-xo.html
5 Foundational boundaries for epic relationships: th-cam.com/video/WhSJkshArt4/w-d-xo.html
My top 4 verbs of epic love: th-cam.com/video/2GXfv4b1bD8/w-d-xo.html
4 Appreciation rituals for lasting love: th-cam.com/video/VdOTxgYPxgc/w-d-xo.html
I usually include anecdotes from my own marriage ❤️
For meditations, I love Insight Timer and have many of my own meditations on there. Doing a search for "healthy love" brings up a number of results, so you could try there 💕
@@terri_cole thank you very much
Other thing is
Could it be possible that both partners in a relationship could share, both being narcissistic and codependent?
I´m asking cuz I watched you video "Why codependents and narcissists can´t break up", and was struck by how Us it is.
Not reeally narc and codep, but we live in a family with kids with huge needs, thus putting our worst personallyties to play, while beeing passionately "in love" and both feeling realy bad.
But the thing is that, I can´t say that neither me or my whife are "bad" persons, we both do lots of good things, but unfortunately also the opposite.
And we just can´t quit although we have tried, it´s almost like a drug.
Thanx for great videos.
my grandmother said he wasnt going to be with you he is a player
They did not have such
where I can find the questions?
In this guide: www.terricole.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/05/Downloaded-Love-Blueprint.pdf ❤️
@@terri_cole thanks ☺️
No, no one could communicate at all
I think a lot of us experienced that, unfortunately!
the blueprint link doesn't work :(
It is fixed now. Thanks for the heads up!
Help me understand my pattern. my dad is a total a-hole and my mom is the sweet and caring one who's always trying to save the relationship. I tend to attract broken women with trouble pasts and relationships then leave me months in the relationship
Hello, I hope you don't mind sharing with you an idea that to me looks as you repeat how your mom behaved, maybe you are overly nice and don't have any boundaries so you attract personality type as your father used to be. I wish you all the best. :) Maybe balanced approach would be helpful, learning to be nice but being able to say ,,no" from time to time and also making some kind of expectation from another person can help too, you don't have to do everything by yourself in relationship :)
I have a personal page follow me on Facebook campaigning Against domestic violence
quit rambling