Only a deep intimate relationship with God can make me feel complete. I am married with kids and I must say none of those things really makes you complete,you have to feel complete within yourself and have a relationship with God. Don’t let society sell you dreams that are false ❤
As a single woman in my 30s, I find such conversations interesting. Society puts so much pressure on women to get married young and the church does too. Interestingly enough, society doesn't seem to put pressure on men to commit to someone as early, except in church circles, as you mentioned. I think it's important to realise that a person can focus on their purpose and find fulfilment in other areas of life before entering into marriage or even if they never get married.
@ShoSho-l5c I do not hate marriage and I am not against marriage. In fact, I think marriage is a beautiful institution that was created by God and is a beautiful thing when done right. I am just saying that society should not act as if a woman does not have a purpose just because she is not a wife or a mother, because she can still find purpose and fulfilment by pursuing other areas/goals in her life. For example, what if she volunteers at her church to give food and clothes to the poor? Does it mean that she does not have a purpose simply because she has not married yet? She is making a positive impact in society in other ways, so society should recognise that. That's what I mean.
@@AZANlA That's not true.Sperm quality of Man decrease after 35. Christianity is Patriarchy driven.Thats why we push into marriages while we boys do whatever their want. And spent time with pros@ti@tute and girlfriend before Marriages .This life is build for Male.
I think I’m at a point in my life where protecting my peace is of the outmost importance, as someone who grow up in a very conservative, religious space, I’ve seen the facade behind marriages, it’s almost like it was a front to please the church and what the community telling you how you are supposed to live or be
Because marriage can be "hard," there will always be a facade. Especially when 2 people may be going through struggles that come with marriage and still have to live and function under the umbrella of the family that they created. The "hard" part needs to be discussed more. Married folks need to share more as opposed to trying to convince everyone that they have the greatest marriage ever lol. "Happiness" ain't in those vows, but it can be created. I'm 11 years in and nothing I was taught or shown about marriage was true. I saw my parents who were married 30 years and should have known from that, that what mainstream society pushed as "marriage" was not what it was.
Given always gives the most thought provoking perspective. I enjoy his views because I think we often make definite assumptions/conclusions forgetting that there's always a different point of view which can also be true. Loved the episode as per usual and you guys are amazing ❤
I love marriage but I dont want kids which is a taboo to even mention in Botswana. I also dont think i would want the responsibility of taking care of a household, cooking and cleaning for a man who feels emasculated when required to assist around the home even in a 50/50 dynamic. I also see married man cheat, i am always approached some and have seen some of my friends being cheated on. By virtue of all this, perhaps maybe marriage is a little more than i can chew for now.
You and I rocking the same boat❤😂. And not to forget those partners who leave you to raise a child and then you're the single parent 😢 having to chase after them.
Given 😭😭😭 when I moved out of home, I was told by a family member that I will be loose as a woman. A family member fought so hard with a guy who cheated and impregnated another girl. They failed to reconcile us to the point that my family stopped talking to me because again, I want to be promiscuous. It has been over 3 years. Little do they know I never slept with that guy, was celibate for 3 years before I met him and have continued to be. So much for me being "promiscuous".
I know people who also dont conform to traditional education and going to university, i also know people who dont desire being rich or having money. Its call being a "Nonconformist" When you dont conform to things that other people may see as good or desire.
I listened to this conversation twice on repeat. I am 38years mother of two boys and unmarried, I thought I was gonna marry the father of my kids but changed my mind. For the longest time I never felt I wanted to get married, I think it was because of the kind of men around me. Men I grew up around and men I previously dated. I lived my life saying "if it happens, fine and if it doesn't its fine also." I even told my dad at some point gore " I am living my life and it is as it should be ke ntse ke sa nyalwa." Emma spoke about purpose, very important that you find who you are and what your purpose is before you carry someone else into your life especially with the hope of a forever. That is why most marriages fail because people don't know themselves, where they are going and keep evolving with the wrong people along the way.
Don't you think it's important to "marry before you carry"? To be a wife before a mother? It appears that you had the children first. This is not to throw shade as reading your post shows that you are intelligent and articulate. I am just saying that whatever your issues were with your children's father, being married would have made you have to work through whatever issues that you had with him. Because you were not married, it appears that it was easier to move on from him. As a married man myself, it has held me accountable through some tough times (which is why I believe the creator emphasized the idea or institution of it). Had you married your child's father, do you think it would have ended in divorce? Or, would you have found a way to make it work despite your indifferences? Much luv to you sis.
Guys. I see it all. I don't want people in my house nna. Not my child, not my spouse. So I will not neither have a child & nor a spouse. My house needs to be a sanctuary.
@@dikeledimothiba65 I want to connect only when I want to, and have a place to go back when I can decompress. When home is a place a need to decompress from, instead of decompress at, we have a problem . . . A BIG PROBLEM.
😫😫 I was counselled about this without my consent. I'm an introvert who is also an empath, so you can imagine how loud the world is for me. When I go home, I need silence and to fill myself.
@@simie9038 I fully get you Sis..I ended up investing in ear plugs, a loungewear and a large water bottle. I doubt anyone has ever heard my phone ring 🤷🏽♀️ asithuleni maaan! Hhey!! 🤣🤣🤣
I like the different topics that are covered here Most importantly i like when when a Christian shares their experiences👌🏾 "What is it?" "What is it about the elderly women that want to pull younger ladies, when they are not benefiting from it"🤔 Also Given's perspective 👌🏾
As a married woman, this conversations is important. for me marriege is not the center or priority but one of the commitments that I have made with someone that I care about. In the last 5 years of marriage, I have learnt from my partner, in observation that I cannot love my partner correctly without prioritising my purpose and dreams. Woman define themselves according to relationships. Normally 😂. Even without marriage, like this lady, most of her focus in this conversation and writing is on the idea of not being involved in this 'relationship'
That’s a powerful observation. The explanation for why some women in today’s world not wanting kids and marriage is actually not as complicated as we make it to be. Women are now empowered, and they have careers, business etc. In the past, your success and standard of living as a woman was determined by the man you marry. This is the reason why marriage was a big deal in the past.Now things have changed….
@@DesignThinkingWithLungile Women are empowered, which is a great thing. The bi-product to that is that we are not having less "family" than in previous times. My grandmother had 9 children, my grandfather overall had 15. We are lucky to see people these days with 2 children most of the time. Those in the Black community are encouraging marriage as the ultimate thing that should come from that is family, legacy. Careers die with you. Unless you are doing something "great" (subjective), is it not more important to pour into a family via a husband. Things "have" changed, but is it for the better? I think women must find a balance with both careers and family.
I am 36, soon to be 37. No wife, no kids, single, never been married, doing extremely well and im often told i am good looking (tall dark and gojasi vibes lol), but to be honest ive given up on marriage even have the desire to try. The streets are just too brutal for some of us with weak hearts.
Never been with a man. I'm in my early 30s. Just by looking at how people in relationships are doing things, our weak hearts are safe single.😅 And we're doing well.
@@SouthAh I'm very single, never been married either, and a great conversationalist. Also particularly interested in men outside my jurisdiction(Botswana),especially south African. 😂😂 In case you missed t, I'm dropping the handkerchief.
Loved the hormone part and it's something that people don't talk about, those two or three days in a month when you really want someone inside of you 😂 but after that your like oh what's the fuss about but it's very normal.
Sometimes pple ask questions not knowing what you are going through "especially when are you having a baby"bathong aeee re tloheleng hle yooo! I hate those questions because sometimes they ask while you are going through something e painful like miscarriage,😢(I've been through that and it hurts)
A very important conversation to be had, especially by our African family, I'm in my early 40's and I have never aspired to be married up until recently when I get these questions on when am I going to get married, a very uncomfortable question I tell you and as an individual I always don't have the answer to the question. I'm glad that this episode has given me so much answers that I can give to people. Thank you TCC for always empowering us❤❤❤ I forgot to add. Ursh the Shirt you wearing, beautiful. Can you kindly plug me where can I get it.
I feel like the guest's mother knows how beautiful it is to go through life with a friend for life a partner rather than alone and she wants that for her daughter. That why she encourages you to find a partner
10:14 i think her mom is pestering because she's worried that she'll end up alone and probably regret not marrying soon. Even though it might be annoying to have marriage being imposed on you, i kinda understand why parents may be pushy sometimes.
This is very interesting. It's definitely another perspective. No one perspective is perfect but we all get to live out our own point of view. It's definitely brave and I live for people rejecting the conditioning and being introspective enough to know what is authentically their own choice. Love love love❤
very interesting...i know Emma from church and tembisa, bought her book a while back, lovely soul, i never knew she felt this way about marriage though. the guy's comment about his wife, love love love it.
It goes back to the issue that you raise Ursula, "Christmas pray things away instead of addressing issues, God showed me this person jiki, jiki married, jiki Jiki devorce
And she never dated... 😮Yoh! I find it interesting that we have ladies who genuinely don't want/see themselves married. Very interesting! She seems happy for real though 😘 I'm wishing her all things bright and beautiful. Mara nna yena... I'd love to be married with children & build a family 😍💋🙈 - conversations or not, opinions or not, life this or life that. Story. Ke re Yeeey! Thungisaniii... 😂😘🥂 Anyway lovely podcast. New subscriber✌️
I'm in America and I absolutely love these conversations because I see and realize that we all are going through similar situations. Emmah Mabye has so straightforwardly put the Truth in front of us. She is so powerful in her Christian life. Being a feminist. You can visibly see that she is someone who is so comfortable enjoying her company and her life. What an inspiration she is! Thank you for another extraordinary conversation.
It just struck me now that maybe the reason marriage is such a big deal for woman than men is because they historically had to show they are of value in society and the only way it was possible to achieve was to get married in order to get the respect, honour and dignity from society. Even though it has shown that it did yield many benefits aside from financial security and position of esteem in their community.
Not only are we missed by it, but "lefetwa" is so deep because it also means "Men don't see you as worthy of it." It's an insult. To say, "Shame. You invisible, shell of a woman." Our guest has a oneness with herself, the God in her. We must know ourselves before we make these decisions.❤
Emmah knows herself so well and I like that she stands in her truth. I admire her for telling her sisters not to follow her but to follow their dreams.
Singleness is not a worldly thing or a self thing, it's a God thing, God gives some the gift of singleness and Paul explains beautiful why and what one should do in their single years or singleness... The problem is whether married or single most people even Christians are self serving. Whether married or single its all for God ❤it should all serve the giver of both gifts.
My goodness, i love this lady. She reminds me of Rorisang Thandekiso like they make this life of being single, committed to self and the Lord look so peaceful, lovely and not so taboo❤😍. I'm 23 and i think i want to live my life similar to hers. And i loved Given's words when he emphasized on the church's duty to help people to see and accept people who don't desire marriage like Emmah. Because I used to go to a church that was like that and pushing the principle of "no sex before marriage" so Givens point was very good.👌
Wooow, a very important and eye opening conversation. I was once where your guest is, being a church girl, born-again and celibate for the longest of times. My view is that from a Christian point of view, their biggest fear is that of fornication. Whenever i hear someone saying they don't want to get married, i commend them, granted they also don't want sex and kids. The conversation we're not having is that as you don't want to get married, are you prepared to live a celibate life? Are you not keen on children? If the answer is yes to both, let them be coz if they are Christian and don't wanna live a celibate life, who are they having it with because at some point it will end up being someone in a relationship or married. I was asked this question in my early 20s and i used to ask them "why" they wanted me married? I joked to the one lady that I'd marry when i meet her husband's brother and lo and behold, 7yrs later i met her husband's brother and we've been married for 10yrs and i have never been happier. Benefits: at home im a breadwinner, my brother got sick and i don't know how I'd have handled all that alone, my friends have been there and supportive but he's the one that wipes my tears when the load is too much and he's also helping me shoulder some of it. Just to mention one
I think that it's time we start opening our minds to having unorthodox marriage setting, we need to do what works for us individually not one size fit all kind of marriage
uh duh! Why would a married person go to a podcast and say marriage is not their priority. Ofcourse it's an unmarried person who would, whether never married before or married and then divorced.
Studies show married women are more stressed out in life and are prone to many diseases caused excessive stress and single women with no kids are the happiest
Emma Emma Emma. If I could bottle you up into a tiny bottle that can be shared with young girls all over the world I would. Man girl. I resonate with your wisdom so much💖
I am a bit confused? She says she’s never dated but mentions that she enjoys relationships? I wish there could be a deeper dive into why she chose not to date? And the type of proposals she had because I feel there’s something missing. Obviously she won’t get married, as it is something that comes secondary to “courting” or dating. Was the decision, something she had even at a young age? I don’t know, I wish more thought provoking questions should have been asked?
Porn and masterbation has made some people believe that they can live without a partner.. I am not saying that there are not those few who are meant to live single, but some resort to hooking up in order to quench the surges of loneliness that occasionally sneak up on them.. If a person has sexual discipline and chooses to remain single, i will believe that they were truly meant to remain single. Also the bible says it is better to marry than to burn with passion
People who believe in marriage or companionship turns to make untasteful assumptions about people who believe in being alone. Where else people who believe in being alone have no issues whatsoever with married people or people in relationships. Live your choice and let others live theirs is not for you to make assumptions off. Let's say they resort to porn or whatever they resort to, what is it for you?. Why don't you marry and keep it moving.
@Thendo-f7x Given spoke about quantitative data vs qualitative data. So how did you gather your facts?. Is like someone saying married people are burdened and miserable? How factual is that?. Cause any single person can easily assume that based on stories we hear about marriage but is not a fact.
It's important that critical decisions including to marry and not to marry be grounded on biblical consideration and not primarily to counter what society imposes on a person . If the ultimate authority is God then only what he says in His word should matter the most about whether a person marries or remains celibate . This where I think Christians should be careful when making such a big decision . One's motivations and intentions matter before God of whom all shall finally account to . Marriage is God's concept and there is biblical basis for celibacy . All other reasons are sinking sand (baseless).
When I was a kid older women tried so hard to avoid being called "lefetwa" to a point some settled in not so good relationships As a young boy I couldn't understand it, couldn't voice it correctly with my young brain Anyways I'm a 41year old man who's never married
Why did you hold back on the hooking up in Church topic... Yooo it's annoying. Clearly people still view single women as incomplete hence the constant question "o nyalwa leng".
We must be careful how use God's name. Apostle Paul says it's okay not to get married by choice and be married to God but overral no men or women can function w/out the other, unless this topic is unconsciously laced by feminism.
As per your religion no marriage no sex aka no kids So whats your purpose then and whats the point of being in the religion if you not following the rules
It seems like it aches you a lot that a woman says she doesn't want to get married. Long as you will be married or maybe currently married be happy for you and let others who have different choices live their choices. She might end up 50 + with a cat and you end up with your family so what?
But honestly, (to host), would you expect your partner to go to a podcast and say they don't know why they are with you? Not every conversation has to be had on the internet, broadcasted to the whole world. I'm for honesty in both scenarios, in marriage or outside but wisdom should precede a need to do a tell all. Time and place.
Only a deep intimate relationship with God can make me feel complete. I am married with kids and I must say none of those things really makes you complete,you have to feel complete within yourself and have a relationship with God. Don’t let society sell you dreams that are false ❤
Very true Mom
Yep🙌
Absolutely 200000% agree
Very True❤❤❤
The way she opened the podcast wow😭😭🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
I liked kudos to her❤
I'm in America and Emmah's poem blew me away. She is now my Mental Mentor.
Married people are not honest indeed, they pull a ^ngena uzozibonela^ stunt on you 😂
Askies sisi. I tell anyone and everyone who is willing to listen about the realities of marriage.
Just like people with kids.. they make it seem so effortless and easy until you in it😢
As a single woman in my 30s, I find such conversations interesting. Society puts so much pressure on women to get married young and the church does too. Interestingly enough, society doesn't seem to put pressure on men to commit to someone as early, except in church circles, as you mentioned. I think it's important to realise that a person can focus on their purpose and find fulfilment in other areas of life before entering into marriage or even if they never get married.
Unless you have a spiritual husband then you'll hate marriage ...
@ShoSho-l5c I do not hate marriage and I am not against marriage. In fact, I think marriage is a beautiful institution that was created by God and is a beautiful thing when done right. I am just saying that society should not act as if a woman does not have a purpose just because she is not a wife or a mother, because she can still find purpose and fulfilment by pursuing other areas/goals in her life. For example, what if she volunteers at her church to give food and clothes to the poor? Does it mean that she does not have a purpose simply because she has not married yet? She is making a positive impact in society in other ways, so society should recognise that. That's what I mean.
There's a reason for the age discrepancy thing, women's biological clock, importance of youth and fertility etc.
@@AZANlA Valid point. That is true.
@@AZANlA That's not true.Sperm quality of Man decrease after 35. Christianity is Patriarchy driven.Thats why we push into marriages while we boys do whatever their want. And spent time with pros@ti@tute and girlfriend before Marriages .This life is build for Male.
I think I’m at a point in my life where protecting my peace is of the outmost importance, as someone who grow up in a very conservative, religious space, I’ve seen the facade behind marriages, it’s almost like it was a front to please the church and what the community telling you how you are supposed to live or be
Because marriage can be "hard," there will always be a facade. Especially when 2 people may be going through struggles that come with marriage and still have to live and function under the umbrella of the family that they created. The "hard" part needs to be discussed more. Married folks need to share more as opposed to trying to convince everyone that they have the greatest marriage ever lol. "Happiness" ain't in those vows, but it can be created. I'm 11 years in and nothing I was taught or shown about marriage was true. I saw my parents who were married 30 years and should have known from that, that what mainstream society pushed as "marriage" was not what it was.
All TCC residents let's gather here ❤.. I love this channel 🙌🏽
I think we're at a place where women are curating the life that's true for them. We're past waiting for anyone to "allow us", the world will adapt.
Given always gives the most thought provoking perspective. I enjoy his views because I think we often make definite assumptions/conclusions forgetting that there's always a different point of view which can also be true.
Loved the episode as per usual and you guys are amazing ❤
I love marriage but I dont want kids which is a taboo to even mention in Botswana. I also dont think i would want the responsibility of taking care of a household, cooking and cleaning for a man who feels emasculated when required to assist around the home even in a 50/50 dynamic. I also see married man cheat, i am always approached some and have seen some of my friends being cheated on. By virtue of all this, perhaps maybe marriage is a little more than i can chew for now.
You and I rocking the same boat❤😂. And not to forget those partners who leave you to raise a child and then you're the single parent 😢 having to chase after them.
@@Leigh-y8q yhooo, sisi. Married single motherhood. Couldn't be me!
Given 😭😭😭 when I moved out of home, I was told by a family member that I will be loose as a woman. A family member fought so hard with a guy who cheated and impregnated another girl. They failed to reconcile us to the point that my family stopped talking to me because again, I want to be promiscuous. It has been over 3 years. Little do they know I never slept with that guy, was celibate for 3 years before I met him and have continued to be. So much for me being "promiscuous".
I know people who also dont conform to traditional education and going to university, i also know people who dont desire being rich or having money. Its call being a "Nonconformist"
When you dont conform to things that other people may see as good or desire.
I listened to this conversation twice on repeat. I am 38years mother of two boys and unmarried, I thought I was gonna marry the father of my kids but changed my mind. For the longest time I never felt I wanted to get married, I think it was because of the kind of men around me. Men I grew up around and men I previously dated. I lived my life saying "if it happens, fine and if it doesn't its fine also." I even told my dad at some point gore " I am living my life and it is as it should be ke ntse ke sa nyalwa." Emma spoke about purpose, very important that you find who you are and what your purpose is before you carry someone else into your life especially with the hope of a forever. That is why most marriages fail because people don't know themselves, where they are going and keep evolving with the wrong people along the way.
I understand this so much
Don't you think it's important to "marry before you carry"? To be a wife before a mother? It appears that you had the children first. This is not to throw shade as reading your post shows that you are intelligent and articulate. I am just saying that whatever your issues were with your children's father, being married would have made you have to work through whatever issues that you had with him. Because you were not married, it appears that it was easier to move on from him. As a married man myself, it has held me accountable through some tough times (which is why I believe the creator emphasized the idea or institution of it). Had you married your child's father, do you think it would have ended in divorce? Or, would you have found a way to make it work despite your indifferences? Much luv to you sis.
Guys. I see it all. I don't want people in my house nna. Not my child, not my spouse. So I will not neither have a child & nor a spouse. My house needs to be a sanctuary.
Wow. I'm interested in a convo with you. To see a different perspective of life. Is this only in your house or you don't like connecting in general?
@@dikeledimothiba65 I want to connect only when I want to, and have a place to go back when I can decompress. When home is a place a need to decompress from, instead of decompress at, we have a problem . . . A BIG PROBLEM.
😫😫 I was counselled about this without my consent. I'm an introvert who is also an empath, so you can imagine how loud the world is for me. When I go home, I need silence and to fill myself.
@@MissCombs1511I have found my clan😢
@@simie9038 I fully get you Sis..I ended up investing in ear plugs, a loungewear and a large water bottle. I doubt anyone has ever heard my phone ring 🤷🏽♀️ asithuleni maaan! Hhey!! 🤣🤣🤣
I like the different topics that are covered here
Most importantly i like when when a Christian shares their experiences👌🏾
"What is it?" "What is it about the elderly women that want to pull younger ladies, when they are not benefiting from it"🤔
Also Given's perspective 👌🏾
As a married woman, this conversations is important. for me marriege is not the center or priority but one of the commitments that I have made with someone that I care about. In the last 5 years of marriage, I have learnt from my partner, in observation that I cannot love my partner correctly without prioritising my purpose and dreams. Woman define themselves according to relationships. Normally 😂. Even without marriage, like this lady, most of her focus in this conversation and writing is on the idea of not being involved in this 'relationship'
That’s a powerful observation. The explanation for why some women in today’s world not wanting kids and marriage is actually not as complicated as we make it to be. Women are now empowered, and they have careers, business etc. In the past, your success and standard of living as a woman was determined by the man you marry. This is the reason why marriage was a big deal in the past.Now things have changed….
@@DesignThinkingWithLungile Women are empowered, which is a great thing. The bi-product to that is that we are not having less "family" than in previous times. My grandmother had 9 children, my grandfather overall had 15. We are lucky to see people these days with 2 children most of the time. Those in the Black community are encouraging marriage as the ultimate thing that should come from that is family, legacy. Careers die with you. Unless you are doing something "great" (subjective), is it not more important to pour into a family via a husband. Things "have" changed, but is it for the better? I think women must find a balance with both careers and family.
I am 36, soon to be 37. No wife, no kids, single, never been married, doing extremely well and im often told i am good looking (tall dark and gojasi vibes lol), but to be honest ive given up on marriage even have the desire to try. The streets are just too brutal for some of us with weak hearts.
Never been with a man. I'm in my early 30s. Just by looking at how people in relationships are doing things, our weak hearts are safe single.😅 And we're doing well.
@@SouthAh I'm very single, never been married either, and a great conversationalist. Also particularly interested in men outside my jurisdiction(Botswana),especially south African. 😂😂 In case you missed t, I'm dropping the handkerchief.
Zithathele mina mtakababa
@@ceboxgaming9401😂😂😂😂😂😂
Loved the hormone part and it's something that people don't talk about, those two or three days in a month when you really want someone inside of you 😂 but after that your like oh what's the fuss about but it's very normal.
Sometimes pple ask questions not knowing what you are going through "especially when are you having a baby"bathong aeee re tloheleng hle yooo! I hate those questions because sometimes they ask while you are going through something e painful like miscarriage,😢(I've been through that and it hurts)
I talk a lot. I ask a lot. That shoe fits me. So sorry❤
A very important conversation to be had, especially by our African family, I'm in my early 40's and I have never aspired to be married up until recently when I get these questions on when am I going to get married, a very uncomfortable question I tell you and as an individual I always don't have the answer to the question.
I'm glad that this episode has given me so much answers that I can give to people.
Thank you TCC for always empowering us❤❤❤
I forgot to add.
Ursh the Shirt you wearing, beautiful. Can you kindly plug me where can I get it.
I like Given's analysis it's so wow❤
What a beautiful poem ❤
Truly liberating
I feel like the guest's mother knows how beautiful it is to go through life with a friend for life a partner rather than alone and she wants that for her daughter. That why she encourages you to find a partner
10:14 i think her mom is pestering because she's worried that she'll end up alone and probably regret not marrying soon. Even though it might be annoying to have marriage being imposed on you, i kinda understand why parents may be pushy sometimes.
Really enjoyed this episode, thank you ❤
This was too short😢. Would have loved more questions/views from the guest. Nonetheless it was a great conversation ❤
This is very interesting. It's definitely another perspective. No one perspective is perfect but we all get to live out our own point of view. It's definitely brave and I live for people rejecting the conditioning and being introspective enough to know what is authentically their own choice. Love love love❤
very interesting...i know Emma from church and tembisa, bought her book a while back, lovely soul, i never knew she felt this way about marriage though. the guy's comment about his wife, love love love it.
The host is gorgeous 😊
It goes back to the issue that you raise Ursula, "Christmas pray things away instead of addressing issues, God showed me this person jiki, jiki married, jiki Jiki devorce
And she never dated... 😮Yoh! I find it interesting that we have ladies who genuinely don't want/see themselves married. Very interesting!
She seems happy for real though 😘 I'm wishing her all things bright and beautiful.
Mara nna yena... I'd love to be married with children & build a family 😍💋🙈 - conversations or not, opinions or not, life this or life that. Story. Ke re Yeeey! Thungisaniii... 😂😘🥂
Anyway lovely podcast. New subscriber✌️
ma'am that opening was annointed yoh
Yohhhh so true!! The hormones are REAL😭 I feel like the older I have gotten, the more intense my hormones have gotten.
Such a relatable conversation, I thoroughly enjoyed it🙂
I enjoy the humor 🤣😂.. thank you for the informative episode as always.
I'm in America and I absolutely love these conversations because I see and realize that we all are going through similar situations. Emmah Mabye has so straightforwardly put the Truth in front of us. She is so powerful in her Christian life. Being a feminist. You can visibly see that she is someone who is so comfortable enjoying her company and her life. What an inspiration she is! Thank you for another extraordinary conversation.
It just struck me now that maybe the reason marriage is such a big deal for woman than men is because they historically had to show they are of value in society and the only way it was possible to achieve was to get married in order to get the respect, honour and dignity from society. Even though it has shown that it did yield many benefits aside from financial security and position of esteem in their community.
Whew! 😮💨
Not only are we missed by it, but "lefetwa" is so deep because it also means "Men don't see you as worthy of it."
It's an insult. To say, "Shame. You invisible, shell of a woman." Our guest has a oneness with herself, the God in her. We must know ourselves before we make these decisions.❤
Emmah knows herself so well and I like that she stands in her truth. I admire her for telling her sisters not to follow her but to follow their dreams.
@@boipelommileng yohh Ausi! If you're not invisible yours problematic somehow. I hear you sis!
Singleness is not a worldly thing or a self thing, it's a God thing, God gives some the gift of singleness and Paul explains beautiful why and what one should do in their single years or singleness... The problem is whether married or single most people even Christians are self serving. Whether married or single its all for God ❤it should all serve the giver of both gifts.
You guys le Wholesome, hle🥰 I always enjoy your conversations even more so that letswa Vaal. Ke proud jwang of you🤩
My goodness, i love this lady. She reminds me of Rorisang Thandekiso like they make this life of being single, committed to self and the Lord look so peaceful, lovely and not so taboo❤😍. I'm 23 and i think i want to live my life similar to hers.
And i loved Given's words when he emphasized on the church's duty to help people to see and accept people who don't desire marriage like Emmah. Because I used to go to a church that was like that and pushing the principle of "no sex before marriage" so Givens point was very good.👌
I am a mother of boys, and i have been pressing them to think abt marriage, this got to me. This conversation shows me an other side to life...
I enjoyed this Conversation so much. This resonates so deeply with me. I'm a mature single woman as well. I am pursuing contentment❤️😊
What an interesting video. I loved hearing the unique perspectives.
Love this, happy to see I’m not the only one who feels like this ❤
Hands down, this, by far, is one of the best episodes on TCC. Enjoyed it thoroughly.
Lols Side note: Sicela iEpisode yesiZulu please #hides
Wooow, a very important and eye opening conversation. I was once where your guest is, being a church girl, born-again and celibate for the longest of times. My view is that from a Christian point of view, their biggest fear is that of fornication. Whenever i hear someone saying they don't want to get married, i commend them, granted they also don't want sex and kids. The conversation we're not having is that as you don't want to get married, are you prepared to live a celibate life? Are you not keen on children? If the answer is yes to both, let them be coz if they are Christian and don't wanna live a celibate life, who are they having it with because at some point it will end up being someone in a relationship or married.
I was asked this question in my early 20s and i used to ask them "why" they wanted me married? I joked to the one lady that I'd marry when i meet her husband's brother and lo and behold, 7yrs later i met her husband's brother and we've been married for 10yrs and i have never been happier.
Benefits: at home im a breadwinner, my brother got sick and i don't know how I'd have handled all that alone, my friends have been there and supportive but he's the one that wipes my tears when the load is too much and he's also helping me shoulder some of it. Just to mention one
I think that it's time we start opening our minds to having unorthodox marriage setting, we need to do what works for us individually not one size fit all kind of marriage
Emmah ❤❤❤❤
Can we have a part 2 of this conversation? Gotta dig deep into the conversation
This was a beautiful conversation
I really enjoyed this conversation 🎉
I really enjoyed this episode ❤
Yohhh! Emma!!!! Tell this truth Sis!
"Is it God's Will for you to be married" 🔥
💞beautiful soul
Given 🎉🎉🎉🎉 dope podcast TCC fam.
It's only the ones who are not married who go on to say marriage is not their priority
uh duh! Why would a married person go to a podcast and say marriage is not their priority. Ofcourse it's an unmarried person who would, whether never married before or married and then divorced.
Studies show married women are more stressed out in life and are prone to many diseases caused excessive stress and single women with no kids are the happiest
A little more time was needed to unpack what Emmah was saying, but otherwise it was a great show as always!
Emma Emma Emma. If I could bottle you up into a tiny bottle that can be shared with young girls all over the world I would.
Man girl. I resonate with your wisdom so much💖
I am a bit confused? She says she’s never dated but mentions that she enjoys relationships?
I wish there could be a deeper dive into why she chose not to date? And the type of proposals she had because I feel there’s something missing. Obviously she won’t get married, as it is something that comes secondary to “courting” or dating. Was the decision, something she had even at a young age? I don’t know, I wish more thought provoking questions should have been asked?
Porn and masterbation has made some people believe that they can live without a partner.. I am not saying that there are not those few who are meant to live single, but some resort to hooking up in order to quench the surges of loneliness that occasionally sneak up on them.. If a person has sexual discipline and chooses to remain single, i will believe that they were truly meant to remain single. Also the bible says it is better to marry than to burn with passion
People who believe in marriage or companionship turns to make untasteful assumptions about people who believe in being alone. Where else people who believe in being alone have no issues whatsoever with married people or people in relationships. Live your choice and let others live theirs is not for you to make assumptions off. Let's say they resort to porn or whatever they resort to, what is it for you?. Why don't you marry and keep it moving.
@@jeansophia2092 These are not assumptions but facts! And they can do whatever they want.
@Thendo-f7x Given spoke about quantitative data vs qualitative data. So how did you gather your facts?. Is like someone saying married people are burdened and miserable? How factual is that?. Cause any single person can easily assume that based on stories we hear about marriage but is not a fact.
Marrying for sex doesn't sound like a good idea.
@@Thendo-f7x They are assumptions
😢oh i enjoyed the episode❤
Lekker episode...
Obhuti waka is unmarried and almost 44 so he said ene ke "mohiti" 😂😂😂just live your life okes people will always talk
It's important that critical decisions including to marry and not to marry be grounded on biblical consideration and not primarily to counter what society imposes on a person . If the ultimate authority is God then only what he says in His word should matter the most about whether a person marries or remains celibate . This where I think Christians should be careful when making such a big decision . One's motivations and intentions matter before God of whom all shall finally account to . Marriage is God's concept and there is biblical basis for celibacy . All other reasons are sinking sand (baseless).
36:15 🤌
The ogies ba tloka in...🤭
When I was a kid older women tried so hard to avoid being called "lefetwa" to a point some settled in not so good relationships
As a young boy I couldn't understand it, couldn't voice it correctly with my young brain
Anyways I'm a 41year old man who's never married
My sister your are fighting the very religion you claim to follow
with w0men, notice it's always "that's how i feel right now"
wthr explicit or not!
Because women change their minds all the time and that is perfectly fine, no matter what informs that change.
🖤
Why did you hold back on the hooking up in Church topic... Yooo it's annoying. Clearly people still view single women as incomplete hence the constant question "o nyalwa leng".
True, that time single women don’t hold the keys to marriage. Women don’t propose and those that do are deemed desperate.
We must be careful how use God's name. Apostle Paul says it's okay not to get married by choice and be married to God but overral no men or women can function w/out the other, unless this topic is unconsciously laced by feminism.
Trying to prove a point as a feminist
At 50+ years people will be with their families and you will be alone with your cats my sister
As per your religion no marriage no sex aka no kids
So whats your purpose then and whats the point of being in the religion if you not following the rules
It seems like it aches you a lot that a woman says she doesn't want to get married.
Long as you will be married or maybe currently married be happy for you and let others who have different choices live their choices.
She might end up 50 + with a cat and you end up with your family so what?
@ congrats you are on your way to saying goodnight to cats and dogs
I wish they could have asked her about sex
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa vi's
But honestly, (to host), would you expect your partner to go to a podcast and say they don't know why they are with you?
Not every conversation has to be had on the internet, broadcasted to the whole world. I'm for honesty in both scenarios, in marriage or outside but wisdom should precede a need to do a tell all. Time and place.
This conversation is so one dimensional.
Coming from a Christian guy.
I feel without a man , the conversation is not fully informed.
Love this, happy to see I’m not the only one who feels like this ❤
Love this, happy to see I’m not the only one who feels like this ❤
Love this, happy to see I’m not the only one who feels like this ❤
Love this, happy to see I’m not the only one who feels like this ❤
Love this, happy to see I’m not the only one who feels like this ❤
Love this, happy to see I’m not the only one who feels like this ❤