"Is my therapist bored with me?" | ep.201
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 6 ก.ย. 2024
- This week licensed therapist, Kati Morton explains her feelings about not seeing clients anymore, why some of us can’t stop thinking about our therapist no matter how hard we try, and why we can obsess over eating disorder content. She then talks about why our struggles can be inconsistent, how to deal with a child who has BPD, and the effects of financial trauma. Finally, she explains what emotional neglect is and how it can play out as we grow up.
Ask Kati Anything audience questions for podcast ep. 201
1. I was wondering if you could tell us more about how you feel about not working with clients anymore, the reasons you've stopped and whether you ever miss it?
2. I wanted to ask why I can't stop thinking about my therapist no matter how hard I try. I spend hours of my day either googling her up, or trying to find a way to hear her voice or find a picture. I feel horrible for invading her privacy, but no matter what I do I can't seem to stop. Even though I find the same things online every time I search her up, I still continue to do it for hours hoping to find something new. Afterwards I feel extremely guilty and I can't sleep, and I want to punish myself...
3. I would love some feedback on why I seem to obsess over eating disorder content. Lately I have been obsessed with books, movies, & videos about EDs. I have gone through several periods like this in the past (the obsession seems to only last for like a week each time). I can’t seem to focus on anything else, which makes it hard for me to concentrate at work & to talk to my husband about how I am doing.
4. Why do I feel like my struggles are never consistent? I feel like one week I’m struggling a lot with my ED, another week I can’t stop thinking and getting urges to SH (and then feeling guilty for always doing it), and then a different week I have breakdowns, panic attacks, and crying spells due to some traumatic things that happened not so long ago.
5. Hi Kati...this is a difficult question to ask. Almost 5 years ago our young adult son moved out of our home leaving only a note that said "moved" on it. He cut off all communication with his dad and me and has very little with his older sister. A year prior to him leaving he was diagnosed with BPD after self admitting himself to a mental health facility. When he came home we had a roller coaster year with him, especially me. I am struggling badly with the idea of never seeing him again...and am filled with shame and guilt. I don't want this last several chapters of my life to be this...I am now agoraphobic, lonely and so depressed. I need joy back in my life. Who knows, perhaps by writing this comment I will find my joy.
6. My question is about the constant worry about finances. I’m hoping this question may resonate with someone else out there. So, for as long as I can remember I’ve worried about finances so much so, that I avoid spending money on myself most of the time. If I receive a gift card from someone during the holidays I sometimes use it to buy someone else a gift for a future occasion. I often experience a pain that feels almost physical when spending money on something that isn’t a recurring expense. This is typically followed by...
7. Is it emotional neglect if your parents never played with you as a child and didn't tell you how to use feminine hygiene products when you got your period and don't share anything about themselves?
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Timestamps!
Q1 - 1:03
Q2 - 8:09
Q3 - 19:42
Q4 - 33:02
Q5 - 36:55
Q6 - 40:26
Q7 - 47:47
Thank you❤
@@eloisemarie5219 ❤
Congrats on over 200 episodes. Just think about all of the people you’ve helped through this podcast. It was this podcast and community that encouraged me to get back into therapy in 2023 ❤️🧡💛💚💙
Thank you, person who asked the last question! Feels good to be validated.
I’m 68 and I remember as a kid wanting attention so much, I would threaten to run away and my mom would say, ok see you latter……one time one of my 4 daughter were angry for me for some reason and said she was going to run away! It was so traumatic for me to hear her say that, it was like a punch in my gut! I hugged her and I told her I would go with her because I loved her so much and I would miss her so much. Something I think my mother should have said to me.
I had the privilege of going to an exceptional psychologist for about 7 years. I cried when he retired. I kept trying to find a new therapist & after many months, I found another really good one. I recall when seeing that doctor, that he would gently steer me away from venting to a productive session focused on myself. He said it was an honor to serve his clients & earn their trust. I hope he's enjoying a well deserved retirement. My life changed for the better because of him. I know its rough to find a good fit for a therapist but never give up. I ended up going through an online platform(not Better Help!) So that helped me widen my search. Imo, if you think your therapist seems bored, if a discussion doesn't help, time to find a new one.
Which platform
@@Datb2 Grow Therapy, they accept my insurance
Thanks for this video, you keep uploading these lately as I need them - the universe is weird.
The question about thinking about your therapist was useful. After a long time of trying to find a psychiatrist that is good and listens to me, someone whose doing more than just medication, and allowing me to process with psychotherapy has been very validating and comforting since they also specialize in trauma. We've been meeting weekly for months now - and I have started thinking about them - like humanizing them and thinking about their life outside of our sessions - it started to feel kind of yucky and weird. I am not thinking about them for hours like the original person asking the question, but it's enough to feel weird.
Your video helped me understand this in myself a bit more and to feel less creepy or like a weirdo, that this is fairly normal.
I Had a therapist who yawned, multiple times when i was talking. Did not returned to her, but it took a lot of time to get another one and to trust they wanted to help and listen to me. i was scared i was boring.
I’m always listening to kati’s podcast on spoti and here on youtube.
However, I think she never discussed moving on from break ups or love in general.
I am also curious on her take about self forgiveness for hurting the people you love.
I hope she can talk about these.
True. You are reaching us out there. Thank you!
The money question hit hard as I did so much growing up that was disrespectful to self to survive and that’s def colored my work life and money.
I wish I could find a therapist in the 1st place…I’ve left numerous messages and joined 3 waitlists online, and 5 months later not one call back. How can those who call themselves mental health professionals just ignore messages & leave people hanging?? 😕
I've been in your shoes. It totally sucks. Have you tried psychology today? Its a website if your not aware of it. It shows therapists in your area and is free.I hope this helps
Are you located in Florida?
@@Kv-pk2st I haven’t! Thank you for the info! 🙏🏼 I’m supposed to have 10 free sessions via my employer, but I wasn’t able to use them last year bc I can’t get a call back. Super frustrating…
@@danielclare7717 No
Probably because most of them are burnt out or are no longer taking patients. This is especially common after the pandemic. Some of them also lack professionalism and cannot leave a message on their voice box or website.
Great! Thanks for doing this! Too bad that my questions don't get many thumbs up! But excellent work anyway!
Thumbs up should not be a factor, you are worth more than that.
@@ChiviA84 ❤
Thank you so much Kati 💓
Hi Kati. I have to ask this question. If you no longer see any clients in person, do you feel that you may lose touch with the "coal face" ? You will no longer have the experience of face-to-face interactions. Therapists as well as clients benefit from this. I'm not sure the TH-cam method is the same thing. I watch your videos often, and have learned a lot, but it just isn't the same thing as seeing a therapist in person.
It's true that you've created lots of videos about emotional neglect. But how I wish you can also write a book all about that.
I think my therapist is bored of me and I feel as though she thinks I’m pathetic. But that’s all in my head. I constantly invalidate how I feel and my personal experience. On two separate sessions, she kept falling asleep :/ is that normal? Perhaps she was just having a long day.
Thank you Katie❤
What happens if you think you have a repressed memory of something but you don’t know what it is?
I was reminded that at one point when I was a child I was wetting the bed after I was potty trained and that somehow my pediatrician had me look at a drawing on a tongue depressor to get me to not wet the bed anymore.
I’m wondering now as an (almost) 34year old adult if my mom didn’t have the wherewithal to ask me why I had regressed to wetting the bed and only went straight to “hey Dr can u help me my daughter is wetting the bed”.
Now I’m worried that something I have no memory of now was suppressed when my pediatrician hypnotized me out of wetting the bed with a tongue depressor by stopping the issue at hand but not getting to the root cause.
Hot take ,it’s probably best to just leave so called repressed memories alone especially if you feel that they are negative , I don’t think there is any use digging .
Hi, Katie, thanks for all your videos! Please do some videos on financial anxiety, indeed. Although I can afford to be unemployed for some time, I am currently unemployed and stressing out about finding a job. Then when I do have a job, maybe I save more than I need to and miss on actual life. It's like money, savings and dealing with money itself is some sort of weird enjoyment.
I bought a grilled chicken burger at the mall this week. It was so abysmally small and expensive that I have been trying to figure out how I can make up for the lousy $10 ever since. Two days later it still bugs me. lol. I grew up with a gambling addict father.
Love your videos
I am paranoid that each person I see is bored with me (specifically me.)
Don’t worry about that. Many of us are bored with ourselves. But guess what! Others unknown to you perhaps would find you quite interesting. Definitely.
I understand that. But everyone has something to give.😊
Oh I should give those books to my parents
Such a in😢topic
I require so much attention everyone gets sick of me so, I started spreading out my attention; with my memory issues I am inconsistent. A broken arrow
A therapist when I was in college said I was boring and I was putting her to sleep. I think she wanted to work in the career center not as a therapist because she’d steer the conversation to career things all the time.
My betterhelp therapist looks so tired of me is always late yawning. I deleted my account
I put myself in remision with my first therapist, once I noticed he was bored
could you go back if you wanted to? like are you still regeristed to pracitce?
What people go to therapy to entertain y'all
Historically, there were 7 and then 8 bites for treating eating disorders with opioids. Then 32 bites for treating eating disorders and BPD with much oxytocin, much dopamine, much norepinephrine, and much gaba. That was much much much much time ago. 😆😆😆😆
For $200+/hr, you'd think they could find something about you that interests them or that they like about you. And finally a few are catching on to the trauma-informed thing. They belittled it as babyish for a long time.
Let's face it, the likelihood that your therapist has heard a more interesting story than yours is very high.
She’s interesting and I can understand the issues and how to heal. But I wish she wouldn’t use such foul language. I think that would be offputting for me. Sounds a little unprofessional. But that may be her style..
Appt TH-cam
First one