I haven’t cried in well over 4 years now. While doing this meditation I came extremely close, the closest I have since the last time. It was extremely powerful. Thank you Patrick
I've never cried during a meditation before. This was a first! I still need to cry about how sad and alone my inner child was. She wasn't physically hurt, but you could tell she really wanted someone to care about her and it broke my heart just looking at her. She was weary of me but told me she's really sad and I asked her why. She said because my mom doesn't really love her. I'm BAWLING!!
Thank you. It’s a beautiful meditation which helped me realise that I am confused. My inner child was confused what was she upset about and completely lost as if all of that was invalid. And now my adult self here is also confused over it 🙀 send help! Also I have no idea how I looked like at the particular age I tried to imagine my inner child to be. I can’t piece together my own reflection
No words to thank you enough Patrick. You are a gift from heaven. I cried during the second part of the meditation, I wept and felt so much pain around the heart zone, but then, what a indescribable feeling of peace, unity and oneness. I had to mentally improvise a scenario where I walk with my inner child back home coz I do not drive due to fear of doing anything on my own. Thank you 🙏
This was a really nice meditation, but I must have been in my headspace too much as I did not meet my inner child. I think I need to do this many more times.
Does anyone have any recommendations for a journal I can buy that has inner child exercises? I’m really struggling with connecting to my inner child in a way that feels meaningful
Patrick actually reccomends the book Homecoming by John Grisham. The book is half non fiction and half instructions. it has specific instructions for infant, toddler, preschool, and school aged inner child work. I got a used copy off Amazon for $20. Easy to read too.
I felt physically hot all over like I was super sweaty (which might also be bc its hot out today) but my inner child didn't really react or do anything at all, just kind of listened passively and just went with whatever I said/did, which was pretty alarming, feels like they are already defeated how do I even work with that?
I know my inner child is not one to be hopeful because things always changed for her. Nothing and no one stayed the same or safe. I know that if I keep this up that I will earn her trust and she will put her guard down. Right now they might just be too hurt and tired to try.
This meditation was truly profound. I wasn't sure how to feel at the beginning but then I was totally surprised by how I felt, specially when meeting my inner child. Can we have more of these meditations in different scenarios please? it really helps to explore and feel the emotions of the inner child. Thank you Patrick for this special video.
My inner child tested me if he would be shamed for making mistakes. I assured him that I will never shame him ever. Cheeky kid did risky trades and lost £15k. I didn't shame him (myself) for that mistake, I told him that "don't worry kid, that is just tuition fee, but no more money for risky trades". The kid, who was not allowed to make any mistakes in his childhood, "was looking at me", and it was something amazing, the first time in his life he was not shamed for his mistake. I don't regret any money which was lost, to stop this kid to feel shamed for learning mistakes. He asked me if I regret. I told him that "I regret only that we didn't do it earlier". I've never seen/felt this kid/me been so happy and hopeful.
Wow! Thank you for this - I usually can't do these guided meditations bc they totally freak me out (the music, the "soothing" voice... it all throws me into an anxiety attack). But how you did this was really nice - your normal voice - mild, almost conversational, not trying to sound like anything different.... Thank you, again; and it would be great if you did more of these!
I get this! As a kid I became distrustful, suspicious, adults were always deciding things about me without my consent (like at doctors office, secret meetings about me at school) and trying to manipulate me and control me into accepting something I didn’t understand, but thought all they needed to do was explain and not be condescending. Treat me with respect. So when something smelt “fishy” I would close down and withdraw and isolate. No one really tried to build trust and connect on a deep level.
I think the incompetence feeling comes from the child and the adult still mixed together, so the child feels that "adult stuff" is too much for them (which is true). Maybe you had to grow up too fast. I'd suggest to start with simple, basic things like taking a shower, eating well, sleeping better, etc. It may sound silly, but it's relieving to say to yourself: "You had to take care of this stuff when you didn't have to, I'm the adult now and I'm taking care of both of us". Good luck!
This was difficult for me. I had a very hard time at first visualizing my inner child. She was a very vague, hazy figure. Expressionless, and very quiet. I felt anxiety when asking if she needed anything or if I could help her. I almost didn't want to. It was clear I wasn't feeling very loving toward her and I knew she didn't trust adults, so I felt a little awkward asking. She came into a little better focus when I recalled an actual picture of myself in a bright pink floral summer sundress I wore alot around 7 or 8 years old. I found some compassion when I remembered I am compassionate to and love children, so tried to direct that toward her, knowing she needed alot of encouragement. It gave me and her perhaps a little hope. I actually don't ever recall feeling babyish, or childlike. I feel like I was always this grownup child. Not mature, just having to buck up and act, behave older than I was. Painful experience. Maybe I'll try again another time.
In my visualization, my inner child was very defensive at the "you didn't get what you needed" line. I suspect it's because I've always been my mom's protector and such a line seems aimed at her. I pictured her as very apprehensive about the hand holding. During the part where we were guided to ask if the inner child would go home with us, my inner child was staunchly concerned about taking care of my mom and brother at her home which was apparently different from mine. She agreed to go with me on the stipulation it was for one night (or a limited time frame). She was super surprised when I did the buckling in and picking her up. I sensed loads of distrust of me. Because I know her/me, I know she wouldn't think, in this hypothetical, that any adult is capable of being a good parent or helping more than harming. Interesting exercise. Did I mention I cried the whole way through?
Cried REALLY hard during this meditation. My inner child was seeing any physical interaction as sexual, so they were really scared. That broke my heart, because I would never take advantage of a kid, and I was upset that that kid felt the need to always be on the look for potential danger, no kid should feel that, ever. I also knew that kid was having little crushes on her female friends at school and also hating themselves for not feeling like a girl, and that realization made me cry too. I wanted to take them to a LGBT friendly home, where those things wouldn't be issues anymore.
The time went sooo quick. The park didn't work for me so we were on the beach with a tree near the beach.. She didn't want to hold hands or go anywhere so we looked for stones. Maybe she'll build confidence next time. She was frightened, which really surprised me, but it was very helpful to know. It was nice looking for interesting stones with her. It was a very valuable visualisation but went too far too fast for me which is fine, I got to know myself better and just kept at my own pace. Thank you so much Patrick for this great exploration meditation. It's the beginning of a very fruitful journey. Just looking at each other would have been enough for me.
This was so wonderful. When you said to ask young me if I wanted to join a new family, immediately I remembered that I had wanted to run away. Of course I wanted to get the hell outta that family.
Wow.. this was powerful. When I asked my inner child if she wanted make a new family with me, she said yes, but she didn’t want to make her mom and dad sad or upset. Then she told me she never felt understood or that she belonged or was a part of things. She always felt different and alone. When we walked through the park together hand in hand, I realized the adult me still feels those same things. The feeling of being together with her like a family brought me to tears. I’m not sure I succeeded at being the adult but I did hear what she had to tell me.
Wow so...I wasn’t really sure what to expect during this, I kind of forced myself to do it like a chore, but that really resonated with me in a way I never could have even imagined until now. My introduction to this stuff was today with your playlist and when I was imagining meeting my inner child, out of nowhere with no warning whatsoever I realized I was crying...thank you so much for this
Really struggled with this. I can't connect with the child. I kept crying, but also wanting to avoid and be cynical of the exercise. I could imagine things, but it didn't feel real enough, there was a lot of distance/detachment. It's weird, because I'm a very empathetic person and people have said I'm really nice and a loving person. But, I'm ashamed to say this, I feel a strong reluctance, and some kind of distaste and something like resentment towards the child, I also feel hugely inadequate and feel the reluctance is mutual. I don't like myself, why should they want to have anything to do with me? I feel like we're both unpleasant and reluctant/distant. I wouldn't be that rejecting with another child. I'd want to be supportive, but would still feel like an unpleasant person. It just gets mechanical if I push it, and I'm not sure if a superficial attempt is really doing anything, maybe it's even damaging to the child. It just feels really unpleasant and very taxing. Am I doing something wrong? Can anyone else relate to this or help?
I thought it was interesting when you said "the" child rather than "my" child, so your struggle to connect is showing even in the language you're using. I also noticed that although you're feeling reluctance/distaste and resentment, the fact that you're here, that you tried the meditation, that you cared enough to ask for guidance, and that you showed concern about damaging your inner child all suggest you truly want to make a healthy connection and protect/heal your child at a core level. I'd be sure to let your child know this in some way, that you truly have good intentions despite your struggles. You might try establishing connections in smaller, gentle ways. Like, from time to time, maybe try to remember little details about who you were as a child, your tastes and childhood preferences. Once you've collected a few ideas/memories, you can start bringing those details into your adult life. For example, tonight, I had mac n cheese with hotdogs because it was my favorite dish as a child. Small but tangible acts of acknowledgement can be huge since so many of us were unseen/unacknowledged as children. Also, you might try finding little things you can supply to yourself now that your inner child needed but didn't get. I was always shamed for feeling cold as a child. Now as an adult, I don't scold myself or shame myself for feeling cold. Instead, I get a blanket or sweater, put it on, give my arms a rub and ask my inner child if that's warm enough. Small olive branches offered like this may help, even if your gestures feel awkward at first. The more I started cherishing my inner child in little ways like these, the more she started trusting me in bigger ones. The good news is, I don't think there's a "right" or "wrong" in these matters. Instead, "more helpful" and "less helpful" may be better terms to frame your efforts. I think you're a really brave person for posting with such honesty, and I hope you find the approaches that help you best.
it's taken me a long time to be comfortable doing something like this meditation. I used to have a lot of self loathing or hatred. it's hard to try and connect with myself if I actively hate myself. my inner child was very reluctant and angry. she had a massive freak out and punched and kicked the tree until bloodied. your comment is a year old but I hope you can come back to this healing journey.
I started crying as soon as I see the little my under the tree. And as a neglected child, she didn’t need much from me. Just my company, and being there in a relaxed and non judging manner.
“We” had so much anxiety going into this that I did the body scan as more of a walking-moving meditation but that made me able to sit for the inner child part- so good and imaginative in all the right ways. I am beginning to recognize my traumatized inner child in my anxiety that comes and goes because I have been doing “my homework.” I will be returning to this video many times I know. I noticed I never realized what a compassionate competent parent I am and have been (raised a daughter, worked as a teacher for years) and now turning it toward myself 🙃 Thank you
I’m on day 3 of this series after finding your channel and watching a few other videos of yours. Your content is outstanding, I’ve been in therapy for years and your videos have helped me unlock and work through more than those years combined. The work you do is priceless, so thank you for sharing for free!
Okay so I think you've saved my life literally. I'm 24/7 run by my inner child and only 5 months ago I was kicked out by my parents who shelterd me with no help from them, friends, or family. I'm all on my own with 2 guniea pigs to look after. I cant tell you how many times my car insurance, internet, and even my house rent went a month behind (or even more if its house rent. 2 months) my procrastination is so bad and only today have I found out that the reason why I'm struggling so bad is because of my inner child. Thank you
I saw myself wondering as an unattached child and kind of curious and daydreaming. Second I saw myself with no possibilities or power on daily tasks. This was the moment I got hit with grieve, insteat of care I recieved redicule. What an awful and selfish mother with her new boyfriend she was. This happenend after the death of my father and I had no clue.
I literally thought I was listening to this “in the background on TH-cam” while I worked. When Patrick said to resist the impulse to delay this exercise, I felt I was beginning to have a (low-key) panic attack. This meditation really got me to stop and check in and feel as though I could safely explore all that my body, mind and spirit needed. This is great work, it’s powerful stuff; thank you for this. 💛 P.S. also, it’s fun to remember how I was a REALLY cute kid. So happy. :)
This was helpful! My inner child was about 8 or 9, and when I asked her if she wanted to come be a new family with me, she asked if she would ever see her family again.
Thank you for this ❤️❤️❤️ My inner child was an 8yo holding a book. It was more of a forest setting than a park. She was eager for validation and acceptance, "do you like me for me?" was one question. We read her favourite book together. it was a very emotionally healing experience and it also made that inner child vs adult boundary so much clearer for me!
Thank you for this. This was very loaded for me. When asked what my inner child needed, my inner child said a hug. My inner child agreed to go because she was sad and lonely but said she'll only go if her brother could come. I had a brother I stuck with and protected my whole life who died last year and his child self also got into the car. This was therapeutic but also very difficult. Thank you.
That was really nice and interesting! She was pretty sceptical and scared of me though. Like, this stranger coming up to me telling me she is my older self 🙄 eh, ok... Well, whoever you are, I'll decide if you're safe. Not too close, no touching and I'm définitely nót stepping in a car with you!! The moment of looking at the sky together was the best one. That gave her a bit of trust and calm. A first step to trusting. She couldn't come with me, but she did ask me if I was gonna come back. So we made a deal that I would visit her there, in the park, at the tree, where she felt safe. I guess that's not too bad 😏 I'm gonna have to work a bit to get her trust. I'd love some more guided meditations like this. On my own I get so distracted 😐 Thank you.
I feel like my experience was very unique because my inner child was a teenager (14/15) She was very eager to talk to me and was so happy I held her hand she broke down and started crying. She was so strong and I loved holding her. She accepted me so easily. When we got to the car she looked at me strange when I started to buckle her in lol, but she liked the idea so much it made her tear up again. She liked the car and asked who’s it was. She was so happy when I told her it was ours, our first actually. When I started to drive off I saw littler versions of us in the backseat for a split second and I smiled and waved at them in the rear view mirror. Then my teen self and I turned up the radio and discovered we loved the same music.
I forgot how much my inner me is actually me. I was like... Okay staring a lot, unresponsive, looks like lost in turmoil and I was reminded oh wait... Thats how I am even now. I can't be confused at that 😂😂
Thank you for offering this meditation. Inviting my inner child to join me to create our own family together was a very healing connection. I appreciate how this meditation offers the inner child an opportunity to choose safety when that wasn’t an option during the lived childhood experience.
My inner child after seeing me asked me if it‘s true that we will have short hair as we always wanted. I think she thought we are actually cool and really ourself in our adult version. It’s been difficult to start to make things I really wanted and liked for my self, even haircut!
I started this video with my habitual cynical defensiveness, thinking “okay, l’ll try it but this is so stupid, I mean look at this lame guy and his mushy nonsense.” Literally cried the whole way through. My inner child doesn’t trust me because she doesn’t know how to identify a safe adult or repel an unsafe one. I picked her up from her favourite tree outside her school where she was waiting for my mother - who was often a no show - and she sat in the car in dissociated silence (I suffered with selective mutism as a child). As we drove off, I felt both profoundly relieved and absolutely heartbroken for her. It was incredibly powerful, thank you 🙏🏻💓
TRANSFORMATIONAL Last night I cried looking at old photos (following this series) And today I ugly ugly cried because I was completely in the inner child mode - she doesn’t trust strangers, her eyes were so shocked and skeptic all of my kindness and I had to alter it a bit because she was freaked out about driving away with this “stranger” but she really wanted to be held. I just held her. That’s our version of driving home. For now. I was trembling with anxiety the past 2 days but now that’s decreased immensely. Imagine 😇 Also I noticed myself (real me who’s meditating) peeking from the meditation because you never know what’ll happen when your eyes are closed and you’re that relaxed.. That also made me cry. And it was so powerful when I fought the urge to open my eyes.
Thank you so much for everything, I made it to 4:17 and just started balling. So much gratitude and love for the work you're doing. I know it's really grounding to me.
This was really powerful for me. I imagined myself to be gangly and shy, and like a shadow, almost see-through with indistinct features. I was sort of moving out from behind the corner of a building. I don’t know how the child answered me because I was overwhelmed with tears at seeing that small creature inside me.
I wouldn't have expected to write another of my infamously lengthy comments so soon after the other one, and again: please bear with me if I struggle to find the right words in your language (maybe take it as a fond letter from abroad ;-) However - this is something like a journey we are on together after all, and I guess this meditation I did yesterday turned out to be another milestone for me, so ... well I'm still a bit baffled about the outcome, and I would be happy to share and to say thank you for this opportunity and for this experience. So ... I'd been pushing the video around on my to-do-list for some time because - honestly - I was quite a bit afraid! To try what you wanted us to do by following your meditation for half an hour and to meet the little girl inside me in ernest (not just look at a photograph of a shy, earnest-looking little 6-year-old, or to imagine how times were back then) ... well this journey you sent us on was a whole different adventure, right? Then some things happened which I really did not expect, which shook me quite a bit. The meditation worked rather well; it was amazingly easy to follow through, almost a disburdening feeling of ... having a spa day for my soul, a long deserved one I'd never been permitting myself to take. Something like that. I found the beautiful park scene and the big tree quite easily and rejoiced in it, and when it was time, the 'little one' actually showed herself, quite shyly - but that was to be expected, wasn't it? Her posture, her demeanor alone were both so heartwrenching and so familiar - shy and sad somehow she looked, not able to look at me directly (rather a bit like Princess Diana when she was still alive, like looking sideways-down). I tried to make contact, to gain her trust, to ask her - very friendly - what I could do for her ... after a while she looked at me a bit more directly as if to verify if she could trust me, I gave her room to react, not expecting anything in particular and then she smiled a bit -------- and started to take off her shiny shoes and immaculate white stockings, loosen her rather severe bun/chignon, whatever it's called (and believe me, I DO remember the procedure I was submitted to to get THAT thing done every morning, and it was not my idea to have it done that way, and it was rather symbolic for a lot of things, like distinguishing me from my classmates, and I'm sure it was meant to do just that, like appearing ... different? A bit elite?) Well - anyway, she pulled out all those hair-pins and stuff, literally threw them on the ground and shook out her hair to look a bit wild, put her bare feet down on the grass a bit tentatively and gave me a half-smile like: 'so ... do YOU accept me this way?' Well of course I did and I told her so and she seemed to be a little disbelieving and a bit happy too. The touching of hands was a little awkward, almost a step too far, but what can you expect - if I am your average Aspie-autist, then SHE definitely is too and has always been (how I remember all the awkward moments at that time which I (she) just could not explain). I'd never believed before, not if you had told me, but she really followed me to my car and felt safe in there. We drove through some heavy weather and both felt comfortable and safe. I spoke to her and promised her that from now on I would do my best to listen to her wishes, to ask her what she really wants to be or to do and to help her to realize some of the things she'd always had to bury deep down. And I swear that I'm not making it all up right now in the process of writing , but that's what i saw and felt right then (!) while following your voice through meditation. Can you imagine how I felt - I did not expect anything like that to happen during a first attempt at trying to bond with that little girl inside me. I felt sort of joyous and at ease, the adult part of me was quite touched, and I was sure to be on the right track. When I went to bed the other night I did something else (you remember - always the Hermione Granger doing a tad more than necessary *lol*) and invited her to sleep safely by my side, feeling sheltered and secure. I can do that easily as soon as my imagination is on operational temperature, so to speak :-) Eventually that night I started to dream. I was in a big, labyrinth-shaped shopping center with many shops, corners, byways (life in general?). I knew I had a little girl, and she was allowed to roam around on her own a bit, but very soon after, she got lost. I looked for her - just to be told by somebody that she'd been abducted by a lower-class, dysfunctional, unkind and uncaring couple who lived in one of the shops and mocked me and told me that they would never give her back because that's how kids should be brought up (!) and that my way of caring for her was just and illusion and ridiculous. Then they vanished and I started to run around desperately looking for them, and for her. People came and offered their help (one of them must have been you). Another couple in a shop (a 1-Dollar-Shop cluttered with all sorts of junk) mocked me loudly for all people to hear: 'What? Do we look like hiding kids? Do you see her anywhere? So?! Maybe just leave it at that, she's just not yours anymore!'. And I yelled at them (must have actually yelled somehow I assume): 'Why are you so mean? Don't you want me to find her? What kind of people ARE you?' Then they grinned and gave me all the belongings of my little girl, threw them at me like, and I put them safely into one of those lockers, to have them secured at least. The story has no happy end yet, in the end I was still looking for her. But who knows? Sorry - a long tale I know, but never ever have I experienced or dreamt something like that. Isn't it just amazing? I'm so curious to find out what comes next. A huge THANK YOU, as before, may all your wishes and blessings come true to you too, and some more heartfelt, kind regards from Germany (little Sabine waves her greetings too :-)
Thank you so much for all you do. You’ve helped me more than I can express. I tried this guided meditation before and have had progress each time I’ve done it. I’m stuck though in that my inner child (around 14 years old) is: 1. afraid of coming with me bc she’s afraid of getting in trouble with the toxic parent. 2. Feels uncomfortable around genuine expression of love bc toxic parent was narcissistic and only showed contempt and rage. I developed a strong sense of sarcasm and humor in response to that upbringing. In this medication, my inner child wonders if my adult self is being creepy (I know that sounds weird). Help? ❤️
I like the scanning body in small step, start from toes and slowly up. That's what I and most of victims need to focus on feeling. I agree to ask permission with my inner child. I found out she has little resistance and seems try to avoid my requests - denial that she needs help or not trust me yet. Take time to build. Namaste.
Don't want to be cheesy but the moment I hugged the younger me who sometimes only needed just a hug and some soothing words almost made me cry. This meditation was a really scary and interesting experience at the same time.
My inner child just wanted to run around and play and didn’t want to leave with me. I don’t think my inner child trusts my inner adult to provide safety and guidance. I never knew this until this meditation. Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge with us.
Not sure if this often happens but I had two inner children come out and the older one, aged about 7, was really angry, and the little one just wanted a hug.
I was surprised when my inner child, in the visualization, asked why I'm bringing her home and adopting her again. She meant like why was I taking her away, after she had just been adopted by our parents. However, I was surprised because I'd already had some dialoguing about triggers going on before listening to this, so I was surprised she would be resistent at all. I guess it makes sense, though, given how, sometimes, she used to either ask why were we doing this or feeling exhausted or something. I didn't think the process would start over.
I’ve been doing the 30 day inner child challenge and it’s amazing how quickly that’s helped to build trust with my inner child. In the meditation today, she was eager to see me as I was her- much like with a friendly loving parent. She quickly climbed into my lap and wanted to hold my hand with no prompting. In 7 years of inner child work this dynamic has never happened between us, she’s been mostly anxious avoidant until now. Today was the first experience of no avoiding and instead a mix of secure and anxious- that’s a win in my book! For the challenge I ended up getting a small toy for the inner child and a matching larger toy for the safe loving adult, and I think that’s helping to give my inner child a physical sense of someone to anchor to. So glad to have found your videos. Thank you Patrick
Omg this was so PROFOUND! In my meditation, before you even told me what I'd find at the tree, me as a little girl, was peeking around the tree and sort of doing a hide and seek while giggling happily. I instantly knew that was the real me as a child, the one that got lost around age 3 or so. When adult me went around the tree to find the little giggling girl with whom I was instantly in love with, she was terrified and backing away while crying very painful tears. I wasn't really able to just sit quietly with her because once I asked her what she needed and said it's okay, she flew into my arms and started sobbing. I tried to get her to come with me in the car, and she really, really wanted to run away with me, but she was also too terrified to come with me. I'll have to do this a few more times I think, but the profound relief and safety I started to feel inside is very encouraging. Thank you for uploading this. After all these years, I feel like I made a connection again, and something that was once broken is trying to fix itself. Thank you!
It was hard to imagine my own inner child. I kept getting her mixed up with my own daughter at that age. I really had to focus on her, and kept a photo in mind. When I asked her if I could sit next to her she said 'you can sit over there!' across from her. Being that close made her very uncomfortable and suspicious, and she wanted to see whether I wanted to run the show, or we'd share play. So I sat across from her. That made her feel at ease. Then when I asked whether she wanted to go, she was very reluctant, and looked back, saw our family, sisters arguing, mom gritting teeth, inner child watching TV, trying to ignore them while getting teased. She wants to leave, but she can't abandon them. They need someone to make them feel better about themselves. She wants me to send in someone to fix them, then she will go. I said, I'll try. But we have to go. They'll be OK with each other. But we can go, and be happy with each other. And that made her happy.
This was really helpful. Thank you, Patrick. My inner child (IC) didn't want to go home with me yet, but he was playing with GI Joes when I found him and he did talk with me. :)
Your description of “you see two cute little feet” made me start bawling. I wanted so bad to be seen as cute and for my mom to spend time with me. It was hard to be the 2nd oldest of 7 kids and never be seen as cute, or seen as a child, when I needed so much to be nurtured. “You’re old enough” and so I was expected to do for myself. I easily pictured myself as an 8yr old. That’s when my parents marriage got really bad and I witnessed a lot of fights. Neither one of them ever checked up on me to see how I was feeling or if I was ok. But I still really loved my mom, even though she was very emotionally neglectful. It was hard to need her and hate her and love her and know I lacked her. I always thought I would “earn” her love “someday.”
this was a great meditation that I will use more. I was shocked at the emotional response I had walking up to the tree. She refused to come home with me after I asked but after answering more questions she immediately asked to go home. I hope you do more guided meditations or have recommendations. I like how in the book "homecoming" there are multiple ages to welcome the child back home.
This was hard, really really hard. It was great to get out of my own head, but when I imagined taking my inner child’s hand, I kind of broke down, I couldn’t keep back the tears.
My inner child hopped up in my lap and said," Let's go to your house!" It wasn't hard to imagine at all since I had imaginary friends when I was little. I recall insisting my mother set an extra plate at the table for them
This was good, but a bit too fast. Felt like I didn’t have time to actually give my inner child the attention she needed to feel and for me to respond. But a useful beginning place to then create my own connecting practice
This made me fearful. I don't know how to run my own life so I am afraid I will mess this poor child up out of pure ignorance. I was in a dangerous marriage Covert N ex who had no issues with destroying others to make himself look good (including our 2 sons). Because I could not protect them, or myself from this monster, I got fearful. Sorry this sounds pathetic.
Thank you so much for this, Patrick. Wow, I usually can’t seem to get into meditations, but this time I forced my self to do it b/c I want so much to heal my inner child. I was very surprised to find that I was able to do it, and that my inner child is very willing to come with my adult self and be safe. I can’t fully express how special this was for both my inner and adult child…I think this is the first time ever that I have been able to connect with little me. I was surprised that I had so much emotion come up during this, but I am glad that I did it and I am looking forward to learning more and healing more and giving my inner child the love and care that she missed out on years ago.
Thank you for this meditation. My inner child was crying and wanted to just hold her while she was crying. Thank you. This helps with therapist I have been seeing since April of last year. Brightest Blessings Trina 💖
I Think I'm doing it wrong... 😅 In my head child men is completely composed and okay, but me walking towards her made men stop in horror of what happened and I clam Up/cant say anything even though little me is smiling.. I Think I light need to go back and do some of The other excercises again🤔
I'm so relieved that I found this. I was struggling with emotional regulation and felt numb like a zombie. I needed a good cry so I could feel my emotions again, and I think this did it.
Beautiful way to start connecting to my inner child and know how to relate to her. I'd like to lie down when doing this meditation though. Is it important to be sitting having one's feet on the ground? Also, it came spontaneous to place the inner child hand on top of my hand...it feels more real
This triggered me because I was first molested at a park. I was asked if he could hold my hand, hug me, etc. I mentioned that trigger to my therapist today, and now we're going to listen together in her office. I'm looking forward to healing in a safe place with a safe person. Thank you for this.
A lot of guided meditations have gotten on my nerves really quickly - this one stands out to me as actually really calming. Your voice is nice, I liked the music, and could actually focus on other things than how the voice or music felt uncomfortable
Hi Rebecca, I think it's like Patrick says in the beginning- you will make sure- where ever you go- this child is safe and cared for by you. You might ask, where she would like to go or you suggest to go some place and see if she'd like to go with you. And if she doesn't, just have a safe and relaxing time together- maybe hot chocolate, playing a game, reading her a story. 💁♀️🥰👍 Get well and God bless you.xo
My inner child is so distrusting and naturally skeptical of people’s intentions, and I get it cause I’m still like that. Skeptical but adaptable, I want there to be some middle ground of openness instead of wariness but I acknowledge why this happens
Thank you, Patrick, for your wonderful channel. I'm almost on Day 14 of the Inner Child Challenge. I told a few friends on my meditation app to check your challenge out and a couple of them have joined on as well. I get so much peace from hearing you talk and share your learnings. Thank you so much!
this was so amazing. i have severe anxiety and panic disorder, and this meditation brought me so much peace. i have always been uncomfortable with inner child work. this was a wonderful introduction.
This was interesting. My inner child was very shy and actually hiding behind the tree. But surprisingly very open to me and it was quite comfortable sitting with him. The question of asking him if he wanted to join my family was a bit scary but he said yes quite easily, though still shy. This is great start, very happy for this. Thanks!
Visualization for me was very difficult. But speaking to myself and listening to my inner child really makes me feel connected. I can tell she isn't ready to come home with me yet. But I'll keep showing her that I am ready to show up for her. I'll keep talking to her everyday.
I hope my comment will be seen, even though the video is almost 2 years old. I just saw it today (12.22.22). I’m going through a traumatic experience right now as I’m dealing with an elderly parent’s mental health issues and trying to take care of them (I had a good relationship with them growing up and seeing them suffering now is hurting me). Patrick, I’m so glad that you did the body scan first before the actual inner child work. Everything felt alright as I wiggled or clenched different muscles in my body, until I reached the back of my neck, and that’s when I realized I was holding a lot of tension (due to my current situation). I couldn’t stop crying for the rest of the exercise, and yet I was still able to follow along and do my inner child work. My inner child was extremely happy to see me and needed to hold on to me. I suffer from anxiety and my current family situation is giving me great anxiety, so seeing this in my inner child was not surprising at all. I feel like I was able to acknowledge the hurt both 5 yr old me and adult me are experiencing from my current situation. I have a therapy session later today and will bring up this exercise with my therapist. Thank you Patrick for your lifesaving work.
I was so happy to see little me. I really missed her. She is so cute and adorable. I love her so much. I can’t wait to see her again.
I haven’t cried in well over 4 years now. While doing this meditation I came extremely close, the closest I have since the last time. It was extremely powerful. Thank you Patrick
I've never cried during a meditation before. This was a first! I still need to cry about how sad and alone my inner child was. She wasn't physically hurt, but you could tell she really wanted someone to care about her and it broke my heart just looking at her. She was weary of me but told me she's really sad and I asked her why. She said because my mom doesn't really love her. I'm BAWLING!!
Thank you. It’s a beautiful meditation which helped me realise that I am confused. My inner child was confused what was she upset about and completely lost as if all of that was invalid. And now my adult self here is also confused over it 🙀 send help!
Also I have no idea how I looked like at the particular age I tried to imagine my inner child to be. I can’t piece together my own reflection
No words to thank you enough Patrick. You are a gift from heaven. I cried during the second part of the meditation, I wept and felt so much pain around the heart zone, but then, what a indescribable feeling of peace, unity and oneness. I had to mentally improvise a scenario where I walk with my inner child back home coz I do not drive due to fear of doing anything on my own. Thank you 🙏
So so grateful I found your channel, thank you so much ❤️
This was a really nice meditation, but I must have been in my headspace too much as I did not meet my inner child. I think I need to do this many more times.
I see my inner child around 14 years old because that is when the damage really started to escalate.
What does it mean if there are more than one inner children?
Does anyone have any recommendations for a journal I can buy that has inner child exercises? I’m really struggling with connecting to my inner child in a way that feels meaningful
Patrick actually reccomends the book Homecoming by John Grisham.
The book is half non fiction and half instructions. it has specific instructions for infant, toddler, preschool, and school aged inner child work.
I got a used copy off Amazon for $20. Easy to read too.
I felt physically hot all over like I was super sweaty (which might also be bc its hot out today) but my inner child didn't really react or do anything at all, just kind of listened passively and just went with whatever I said/did, which was pretty alarming, feels like they are already defeated how do I even work with that?
I know my inner child is not one to be hopeful because things always changed for her. Nothing and no one stayed the same or safe.
I know that if I keep this up that I will earn her trust and she will put her guard down.
Right now they might just be too hurt and tired to try.
This meditation was truly profound. I wasn't sure how to feel at the beginning but then I was totally surprised by how I felt, specially when meeting my inner child. Can we have more of these meditations in different scenarios please? it really helps to explore and feel the emotions of the inner child. Thank you Patrick for this special video.
I would love to have a series of these meditations!!!!
I also vote for a series
Same here.
A sleep one would be very,very helpful!
My inner child tested me if he would be shamed for making mistakes. I assured him that I will never shame him ever. Cheeky kid did risky trades and lost £15k. I didn't shame him (myself) for that mistake, I told him that "don't worry kid, that is just tuition fee, but no more money for risky trades".
The kid, who was not allowed to make any mistakes in his childhood, "was looking at me", and it was something amazing, the first time in his life he was not shamed for his mistake.
I don't regret any money which was lost, to stop this kid to feel shamed for learning mistakes. He asked me if I regret. I told him that "I regret only that we didn't do it earlier". I've never seen/felt this kid/me been so happy and hopeful.
Wow, that's powerful. Helpful image. Thank you
Love, love, love this... ❤️
Ppp
Popp.
Wow! Thank you for this - I usually can't do these guided meditations bc they totally freak me out (the music, the "soothing" voice... it all throws me into an anxiety attack). But how you did this was really nice - your normal voice - mild, almost conversational, not trying to sound like anything different.... Thank you, again; and it would be great if you did more of these!
I get this! As a kid I became distrustful, suspicious, adults were always deciding things about me without my consent (like at doctors office, secret meetings about me at school) and trying to manipulate me and control me into accepting something I didn’t understand, but thought all they needed to do was explain and not be condescending. Treat me with respect. So when something smelt “fishy” I would close down and withdraw and isolate. No one really tried to build trust and connect on a deep level.
How can I take care of the child if I feel incompetent as an adult?
I think the incompetence feeling comes from the child and the adult still mixed together, so the child feels that "adult stuff" is too much for them (which is true). Maybe you had to grow up too fast. I'd suggest to start with simple, basic things like taking a shower, eating well, sleeping better, etc. It may sound silly, but it's relieving to say to yourself: "You had to take care of this stuff when you didn't have to, I'm the adult now and I'm taking care of both of us". Good luck!
@@Dan_Chiron YES!
@@Dan_Chiron thank you
This was difficult for me. I had a very hard time at first visualizing my inner child. She was a very vague, hazy figure. Expressionless, and very quiet. I felt anxiety when asking if she needed anything or if I could help her. I almost didn't want to. It was clear I wasn't feeling very loving toward her and I knew she didn't trust adults, so I felt a little awkward asking. She came into a little better focus when I recalled an actual picture of myself in a bright pink floral summer sundress I wore alot around 7 or 8 years old. I found some compassion when I remembered I am compassionate to and love children, so tried to direct that toward her, knowing she needed alot of encouragement. It gave me and her perhaps a little hope.
I actually don't ever recall feeling babyish, or childlike. I feel like I was always this grownup child. Not mature, just having to buck up and act, behave older than I was. Painful experience. Maybe I'll try again another time.
In my visualization, my inner child was very defensive at the "you didn't get what you needed" line. I suspect it's because I've always been my mom's protector and such a line seems aimed at her.
I pictured her as very apprehensive about the hand holding.
During the part where we were guided to ask if the inner child would go home with us, my inner child was staunchly concerned about taking care of my mom and brother at her home which was apparently different from mine. She agreed to go with me on the stipulation it was for one night (or a limited time frame).
She was super surprised when I did the buckling in and picking her up. I sensed loads of distrust of me. Because I know her/me, I know she wouldn't think, in this hypothetical, that any adult is capable of being a good parent or helping more than harming.
Interesting exercise. Did I mention I cried the whole way through?
I experienced exactly this scenario
me too
Cried REALLY hard during this meditation. My inner child was seeing any physical interaction as sexual, so they were really scared. That broke my heart, because I would never take advantage of a kid, and I was upset that that kid felt the need to always be on the look for potential danger, no kid should feel that, ever. I also knew that kid was having little crushes on her female friends at school and also hating themselves for not feeling like a girl, and that realization made me cry too. I wanted to take them to a LGBT friendly home, where those things wouldn't be issues anymore.
Me too
It make me cry too 😢She is too sacred to go with me anywhere 😖
I was so surprised at how receptive my little girl was. I didnt think she'd be open to me, but she was Starving for me. She needed this!
Cue the ugly cry. That was beautiful and so very meaningful.
The time went sooo quick. The park didn't work for me so we were on the beach with a tree near the beach.. She didn't want to hold hands or go anywhere so we looked for stones. Maybe she'll build confidence next time. She was frightened, which really surprised me, but it was very helpful to know. It was nice looking for interesting stones with her. It was a very valuable visualisation but went too far too fast for me which is fine, I got to know myself better and just kept at my own pace. Thank you so much Patrick for this great exploration meditation. It's the beginning of a very fruitful journey. Just looking at each other would have been enough for me.
Same for me. I couldn't ask her anything yet, but being a friendly presence was a good start, I think. Untill she (and I) is ready 💝
I felt the same. He didn't even want to look at me
This was so wonderful. When you said to ask young me if I wanted to join a new family, immediately I remembered that I had wanted to run away. Of course I wanted to get the hell outta that family.
Wow.. this was powerful. When I asked my inner child if she wanted make a new family with me, she said yes, but she didn’t want to make her mom and dad sad or upset. Then she told me she never felt understood or that she belonged or was a part of things. She always felt different and alone. When we walked through the park together hand in hand, I realized the adult me still feels those same things. The feeling of being together with her like a family brought me to tears. I’m not sure I succeeded at being the adult but I did hear what she had to tell me.
Wow so...I wasn’t really sure what to expect during this, I kind of forced myself to do it like a chore, but that really resonated with me in a way I never could have even imagined until now. My introduction to this stuff was today with your playlist and when I was imagining meeting my inner child, out of nowhere with no warning whatsoever I realized I was crying...thank you so much for this
Really struggled with this. I can't connect with the child. I kept crying, but also wanting to avoid and be cynical of the exercise. I could imagine things, but it didn't feel real enough, there was a lot of distance/detachment. It's weird, because I'm a very empathetic person and people have said I'm really nice and a loving person. But, I'm ashamed to say this, I feel a strong reluctance, and some kind of distaste and something like resentment towards the child, I also feel hugely inadequate and feel the reluctance is mutual. I don't like myself, why should they want to have anything to do with me? I feel like we're both unpleasant and reluctant/distant.
I wouldn't be that rejecting with another child. I'd want to be supportive, but would still feel like an unpleasant person.
It just gets mechanical if I push it, and I'm not sure if a superficial attempt is really doing anything, maybe it's even damaging to the child. It just feels really unpleasant and very taxing. Am I doing something wrong? Can anyone else relate to this or help?
I thought it was interesting when you said "the" child rather than "my" child, so your struggle to connect is showing even in the language you're using. I also noticed that although you're feeling reluctance/distaste and resentment, the fact that you're here, that you tried the meditation, that you cared enough to ask for guidance, and that you showed concern about damaging your inner child all suggest you truly want to make a healthy connection and protect/heal your child at a core level. I'd be sure to let your child know this in some way, that you truly have good intentions despite your struggles. You might try establishing connections in smaller, gentle ways. Like, from time to time, maybe try to remember little details about who you were as a child, your tastes and childhood preferences. Once you've collected a few ideas/memories, you can start bringing those details into your adult life. For example, tonight, I had mac n cheese with hotdogs because it was my favorite dish as a child. Small but tangible acts of acknowledgement can be huge since so many of us were unseen/unacknowledged as children. Also, you might try finding little things you can supply to yourself now that your inner child needed but didn't get. I was always shamed for feeling cold as a child. Now as an adult, I don't scold myself or shame myself for feeling cold. Instead, I get a blanket or sweater, put it on, give my arms a rub and ask my inner child if that's warm enough. Small olive branches offered like this may help, even if your gestures feel awkward at first. The more I started cherishing my inner child in little ways like these, the more she started trusting me in bigger ones. The good news is, I don't think there's a "right" or "wrong" in these matters. Instead, "more helpful" and "less helpful" may be better terms to frame your efforts. I think you're a really brave person for posting with such honesty, and I hope you find the approaches that help you best.
it's taken me a long time to be comfortable doing something like this meditation.
I used to have a lot of self loathing or hatred. it's hard to try and connect with myself if I actively hate myself.
my inner child was very reluctant and angry. she had a massive freak out and punched and kicked the tree until bloodied.
your comment is a year old but I hope you can come back to this healing journey.
I started crying as soon as I see the little my under the tree. And as a neglected child, she didn’t need much from me. Just my company, and being there in a relaxed and non judging manner.
“We” had so much anxiety going into this that I did the body scan as more of a walking-moving meditation but that made me able to sit for the inner child part- so good and imaginative in all the right ways. I am beginning to recognize my traumatized inner child in my anxiety that comes and goes because I have been doing “my homework.” I will be returning to this video many times I know. I noticed I never realized what a compassionate competent parent I am and have been (raised a daughter, worked as a teacher for years) and now turning it toward myself 🙃 Thank you
I’m on day 3 of this series after finding your channel and watching a few other videos of yours. Your content is outstanding, I’ve been in therapy for years and your videos have helped me unlock and work through more than those years combined. The work you do is priceless, so thank you for sharing for free!
Okay so I think you've saved my life literally. I'm 24/7 run by my inner child and only 5 months ago I was kicked out by my parents who shelterd me with no help from them, friends, or family. I'm all on my own with 2 guniea pigs to look after. I cant tell you how many times my car insurance, internet, and even my house rent went a month behind (or even more if its house rent. 2 months) my procrastination is so bad and only today have I found out that the reason why I'm struggling so bad is because of my inner child. Thank you
You are strong. You can do it without their help. Your guinea pigs love you, and so do I.
❤🙏
Hi, please, get back to us, tell is how you are doing right now
Keep on your inner child healing journey.
I saw myself wondering as an unattached child and kind of curious and daydreaming.
Second I saw myself with no possibilities or power on daily tasks. This was the moment I got hit with grieve, insteat of care I recieved redicule. What an awful and selfish mother with her new boyfriend she was. This happenend after the death of my father and I had no clue.
Dont get distracted by your phone
But what if I'm watching you on my phone?!
I kid :)
I literally thought I was listening to this “in the background on TH-cam” while I worked. When Patrick said to resist the impulse to delay this exercise, I felt I was beginning to have a (low-key) panic attack.
This meditation really got me to stop and check in and feel as though I could safely explore all that my body, mind and spirit needed.
This is great work, it’s powerful stuff; thank you for this. 💛
P.S. also, it’s fun to remember how I was a REALLY cute kid. So happy.
:)
This was helpful! My inner child was about 8 or 9, and when I asked her if she wanted to come be a new family with me, she asked if she would ever see her family again.
I can relate. Mine asked if I could have both families and if I could change my mind whenever I want. That grown child still lives on fences. 😾
Me too.
Thank you for this ❤️❤️❤️ My inner child was an 8yo holding a book. It was more of a forest setting than a park. She was eager for validation and acceptance, "do you like me for me?" was one question. We read her favourite book together. it was a very emotionally healing experience and it also made that inner child vs adult boundary so much clearer for me!
Thank you for this. This was very loaded for me. When asked what my inner child needed, my inner child said a hug. My inner child agreed to go because she was sad and lonely but said she'll only go if her brother could come. I had a brother I stuck with and protected my whole life who died last year and his child self also got into the car. This was therapeutic but also very difficult. Thank you.
That was really nice and interesting! She was pretty sceptical and scared of me though. Like, this stranger coming up to me telling me she is my older self 🙄 eh, ok... Well, whoever you are, I'll decide if you're safe. Not too close, no touching and I'm définitely nót stepping in a car with you!!
The moment of looking at the sky together was the best one. That gave her a bit of trust and calm. A first step to trusting.
She couldn't come with me, but she did ask me if I was gonna come back. So we made a deal that I would visit her there, in the park, at the tree, where she felt safe. I guess that's not too bad 😏 I'm gonna have to work a bit to get her trust.
I'd love some more guided meditations like this. On my own I get so distracted 😐
Thank you.
I feel like my experience was very unique because my inner child was a teenager (14/15) She was very eager to talk to me and was so happy I held her hand she broke down and started crying. She was so strong and I loved holding her. She accepted me so easily. When we got to the car she looked at me strange when I started to buckle her in lol, but she liked the idea so much it made her tear up again. She liked the car and asked who’s it was. She was so happy when I told her it was ours, our first actually. When I started to drive off I saw littler versions of us in the backseat for a split second and I smiled and waved at them in the rear view mirror. Then my teen self and I turned up the radio and discovered we loved the same music.
I forgot how much my inner me is actually me. I was like... Okay staring a lot, unresponsive, looks like lost in turmoil and I was reminded oh wait... Thats how I am even now. I can't be confused at that 😂😂
I've done quite a bit of yoga and guided meditation, but nothing like this. This was really different, in a good way. Thank you~
Thank you Patrick. This is wonderful. Thank you for the effort to make this and for making it available to everyone who can benefit from it.
Thank you for offering this meditation. Inviting my inner child to join me to create our own family together was a very healing connection. I appreciate how this meditation offers the inner child an opportunity to choose safety when that wasn’t an option during the lived childhood experience.
My inner child after seeing me asked me if it‘s true that we will have short hair as we always wanted. I think she thought we are actually cool and really ourself in our adult version. It’s been difficult to start to make things I really wanted and liked for my self, even haircut!
I started this video with my habitual cynical defensiveness, thinking “okay, l’ll try it but this is so stupid, I mean look at this lame guy and his mushy nonsense.” Literally cried the whole way through. My inner child doesn’t trust me because she doesn’t know how to identify a safe adult or repel an unsafe one. I picked her up from her favourite tree outside her school where she was waiting for my mother - who was often a no show - and she sat in the car in dissociated silence (I suffered with selective mutism as a child). As we drove off, I felt both profoundly relieved and absolutely heartbroken for her. It was incredibly powerful, thank you 🙏🏻💓
TRANSFORMATIONAL
Last night I cried looking at old photos (following this series)
And today I ugly ugly cried because I was completely in the inner child mode - she doesn’t trust strangers, her eyes were so shocked and skeptic all of my kindness and I had to alter it a bit because she was freaked out about driving away with this “stranger” but she really wanted to be held.
I just held her. That’s our version of driving home.
For now.
I was trembling with anxiety the past 2 days but now that’s decreased immensely. Imagine 😇
Also I noticed myself (real me who’s meditating) peeking from the meditation because you never know what’ll happen when your eyes are closed and you’re that relaxed.. That also made me cry. And it was so powerful when I fought the urge to open my eyes.
Thank you so much for everything, I made it to 4:17 and just started balling. So much gratitude and love for the work you're doing. I know it's really grounding to me.
This was really powerful for me. I imagined myself to be gangly and shy, and like a shadow, almost see-through with indistinct features. I was sort of moving out from behind the corner of a building. I don’t know how the child answered me because I was overwhelmed with tears at seeing that small creature inside me.
My inner child asked me if we could get a dog.
I wouldn't have expected to write another of my infamously lengthy comments so soon after the other one, and again: please bear with me if I struggle to find the right words in your language (maybe take it as a fond letter from abroad ;-)
However - this is something like a journey we are on together after all, and I guess this meditation I did yesterday turned out to be another milestone for me, so ... well I'm still a bit baffled about the outcome, and I would be happy to share and to say thank you for this opportunity and for this experience. So ... I'd been pushing the video around on my to-do-list for some time because - honestly - I was quite a bit afraid! To try what you wanted us to do by following your meditation for half an hour and to meet the little girl inside me in ernest (not just look at a photograph of a shy, earnest-looking little 6-year-old, or to imagine how times were back then) ... well this journey you sent us on was a whole different adventure, right?
Then some things happened which I really did not expect, which shook me quite a bit. The meditation worked rather well; it was amazingly easy to follow through, almost a disburdening feeling of ... having a spa day for my soul, a long deserved one I'd never been permitting myself to take. Something like that. I found the beautiful park scene and the big tree quite easily and rejoiced in it, and when it was time, the 'little one' actually showed herself, quite shyly - but that was to be expected, wasn't it? Her posture, her demeanor alone were both so heartwrenching and so familiar - shy and sad somehow she looked, not able to look at me directly (rather a bit like Princess Diana when she was still alive, like looking sideways-down). I tried to make contact, to gain her trust, to ask her - very friendly - what I could do for her ... after a while she looked at me a bit more directly as if to verify if she could trust me, I gave her room to react, not expecting anything in particular and then she smiled a bit -------- and started to take off her shiny shoes and immaculate white stockings, loosen her rather severe bun/chignon, whatever it's called (and believe me, I DO remember the procedure I was submitted to to get THAT thing done every morning, and it was not my idea to have it done that way, and it was rather symbolic for a lot of things, like distinguishing me from my classmates, and I'm sure it was meant to do just that, like appearing ... different? A bit elite?)
Well - anyway, she pulled out all those hair-pins and stuff, literally threw them on the ground and shook out her hair to look a bit wild, put her bare feet down on the grass a bit tentatively and gave me a half-smile like: 'so ... do YOU accept me this way?'
Well of course I did and I told her so and she seemed to be a little disbelieving and a bit happy too.
The touching of hands was a little awkward, almost a step too far, but what can you expect - if I am your average Aspie-autist, then SHE definitely is too and has always been (how I remember all the awkward moments at that time which I (she) just could not explain). I'd never believed before, not if you had told me, but she really followed me to my car and felt safe in there. We drove through some heavy weather and both felt comfortable and safe. I spoke to her and promised her that from now on I would do my best to listen to her wishes, to ask her what she really wants to be or to do and to help her to realize some of the things she'd always had to bury deep down. And I swear that I'm not making it all up right now in the process of writing , but that's what i saw and felt right then (!) while following your voice through meditation. Can you imagine how I felt - I did not expect anything like that to happen during a first attempt at trying to bond with that little girl inside me. I felt sort of joyous and at ease, the adult part of me was quite touched, and I was sure to be on the right track.
When I went to bed the other night I did something else (you remember - always the Hermione Granger doing a tad more than necessary *lol*) and invited her to sleep safely by my side, feeling sheltered and secure. I can do that easily as soon as my imagination is on operational temperature, so to speak :-)
Eventually that night I started to dream. I was in a big, labyrinth-shaped shopping center with many shops, corners, byways (life in general?). I knew I had a little girl, and she was allowed to roam around on her own a bit, but very soon after, she got lost. I looked for her - just to be told by somebody that she'd been abducted by a lower-class, dysfunctional, unkind and uncaring couple who lived in one of the shops and mocked me and told me that they would never give her back because that's how kids should be brought up (!) and that my way of caring for her was just and illusion and ridiculous. Then they vanished and I started to run around desperately looking for them, and for her. People came and offered their help (one of them must have been you). Another couple in a shop (a 1-Dollar-Shop cluttered with all sorts of junk) mocked me loudly for all people to hear: 'What? Do we look like hiding kids? Do you see her anywhere? So?! Maybe just leave it at that, she's just not yours anymore!'.
And I yelled at them (must have actually yelled somehow I assume): 'Why are you so mean? Don't you want me to find her? What kind of people ARE you?'
Then they grinned and gave me all the belongings of my little girl, threw them at me like, and I put them safely into one of those lockers, to have them secured at least.
The story has no happy end yet, in the end I was still looking for her. But who knows?
Sorry - a long tale I know, but never ever have I experienced or dreamt something like that. Isn't it just amazing?
I'm so curious to find out what comes next.
A huge THANK YOU, as before, may all your wishes and blessings come true to you too, and some more heartfelt, kind regards from Germany
(little Sabine waves her greetings too :-)
Thank you so much for all you do. You’ve helped me more than I can express. I tried this guided meditation before and have had progress each time I’ve done it. I’m stuck though in that my inner child (around 14 years old) is:
1. afraid of coming with me bc she’s afraid of getting in trouble with the toxic parent.
2. Feels uncomfortable around genuine expression of love bc toxic parent was narcissistic and only showed contempt and rage. I developed a strong sense of sarcasm and humor in response to that upbringing. In this medication, my inner child wonders if my adult self is being creepy (I know that sounds weird).
Help? ❤️
Very nice Patrick. I added my white noise machine sound of birds singing. Lovely. Very soothing. I really like the old tree.
I like the scanning body in small step, start from toes and slowly up. That's what I and most of victims need to focus on feeling. I agree to ask permission with my inner child. I found out she has little resistance and seems try to avoid my requests - denial that she needs help or not trust me yet. Take time to build. Namaste.
Don't want to be cheesy but the moment I hugged the younger me who sometimes only needed just a hug and some soothing words almost made me cry. This meditation was a really scary and interesting experience at the same time.
My inner child just wanted to run around and play and didn’t want to leave with me. I don’t think my inner child trusts my inner adult to provide safety and guidance. I never knew this until this meditation. Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge with us.
Such a deeply healing experience. The safety belt is so powerful. Thank you.
Very helpful. A new daily practice for me. Thank you Patrick and best greetings from the Emerald Isle.
Not sure if this often happens but I had two inner children come out and the older one, aged about 7, was really angry, and the little one just wanted a hug.
I was surprised when my inner child, in the visualization, asked why I'm bringing her home and adopting her again. She meant like why was I taking her away, after she had just been adopted by our parents. However, I was surprised because I'd already had some dialoguing about triggers going on before listening to this, so I was surprised she would be resistent at all. I guess it makes sense, though, given how, sometimes, she used to either ask why were we doing this or feeling exhausted or something. I didn't think the process would start over.
My inner child met me standing saying, "I've been waiting to meet you!"
I’ve been doing the 30 day inner child challenge and it’s amazing how quickly that’s helped to build trust with my inner child.
In the meditation today, she was eager to see me as I was her- much like with a friendly loving parent. She quickly climbed into my lap and wanted to hold my hand with no prompting.
In 7 years of inner child work this dynamic has never happened between us, she’s been mostly anxious avoidant until now. Today was the first experience of no avoiding and instead a mix of secure and anxious- that’s a win in my book!
For the challenge I ended up getting a small toy for the inner child and a matching larger toy for the safe loving adult, and I think that’s helping to give my inner child a physical sense of someone to anchor to. So glad to have found your videos. Thank you Patrick
The feeling of safety and acceptance made me cry. Thank you.💜
Omg this was so PROFOUND! In my meditation, before you even told me what I'd find at the tree, me as a little girl, was peeking around the tree and sort of doing a hide and seek while giggling happily. I instantly knew that was the real me as a child, the one that got lost around age 3 or so. When adult me went around the tree to find the little giggling girl with whom I was instantly in love with, she was terrified and backing away while crying very painful tears. I wasn't really able to just sit quietly with her because once I asked her what she needed and said it's okay, she flew into my arms and started sobbing. I tried to get her to come with me in the car, and she really, really wanted to run away with me, but she was also too terrified to come with me. I'll have to do this a few more times I think, but the profound relief and safety I started to feel inside is very encouraging. Thank you for uploading this. After all these years, I feel like I made a connection again, and something that was once broken is trying to fix itself. Thank you!
It was hard to imagine my own inner child. I kept getting her mixed up with my own daughter at that age. I really had to focus on her, and kept a photo in mind.
When I asked her if I could sit next to her she said 'you can sit over there!' across from her. Being that close made her very uncomfortable and suspicious, and she wanted to see whether I wanted to run the show, or we'd share play. So I sat across from her. That made her feel at ease. Then when I asked whether she wanted to go, she was very reluctant, and looked back, saw our family, sisters arguing, mom gritting teeth, inner child watching TV, trying to ignore them while getting teased. She wants to leave, but she can't abandon them. They need someone to make them feel better about themselves. She wants me to send in someone to fix them, then she will go. I said, I'll try. But we have to go. They'll be OK with each other. But we can go, and be happy with each other. And that made her happy.
This was really helpful. Thank you, Patrick. My inner child (IC) didn't want to go home with me yet, but he was playing with GI Joes when I found him and he did talk with me. :)
Your description of “you see two cute little feet” made me start bawling. I wanted so bad to be seen as cute and for my mom to spend time with me. It was hard to be the 2nd oldest of 7 kids and never be seen as cute, or seen as a child, when I needed so much to be nurtured. “You’re old enough” and so I was expected to do for myself. I easily pictured myself as an 8yr old. That’s when my parents marriage got really bad and I witnessed a lot of fights. Neither one of them ever checked up on me to see how I was feeling or if I was ok. But I still really loved my mom, even though she was very emotionally neglectful. It was hard to need her and hate her and love her and know I lacked her. I always thought I would “earn” her love “someday.”
Thank you Patrick. Your guided med deeply resonated with me.
this was a great meditation that I will use more.
I was shocked at the emotional response I had walking up to the tree.
She refused to come home with me after I asked but after answering more questions she immediately asked to go home.
I hope you do more guided meditations or have recommendations. I like how in the book "homecoming" there are multiple ages to welcome the child back home.
This was hard, really really hard.
It was great to get out of my own head, but when I imagined taking my inner child’s hand, I kind of broke down, I couldn’t keep back the tears.
My inner child hopped up in my lap and said," Let's go to your house!" It wasn't hard to imagine at all since I had imaginary friends when I was little. I recall insisting my mother set an extra plate at the table for them
This was good, but a bit too fast. Felt like I didn’t have time to actually give my inner child the attention she needed to feel and for me to respond. But a useful beginning place to then create my own connecting practice
This made me fearful. I don't know how to run my own life so I am afraid I will mess this poor child up out of pure ignorance. I was in a dangerous marriage Covert N ex who had no issues with destroying others to make himself look good (including our 2 sons). Because I could not protect them, or myself from this monster, I got fearful. Sorry this sounds pathetic.
Thank you so much for this, Patrick. Wow, I usually can’t seem to get into meditations, but this time I forced my self to do it b/c I want so much to heal my inner child. I was very surprised to find that I was able to do it, and that my inner child is very willing to come with my adult self and be safe. I can’t fully express how special this was for both my inner and adult child…I think this is the first time ever that I have been able to connect with little me. I was surprised that I had so much emotion come up during this, but I am glad that I did it and I am looking forward to learning more and healing more and giving my inner child the love and care that she missed out on years ago.
Thank you for this meditation. My inner child was crying and wanted to just hold her while she was crying. Thank you. This helps with therapist I have been seeing since April of last year. Brightest Blessings Trina 💖
I Think I'm doing it wrong... 😅
In my head child men is completely composed and okay, but me walking towards her made men stop in horror of what happened and I clam Up/cant say anything even though little me is smiling..
I Think I light need to go back and do some of The other excercises again🤔
Dear Patrick, you are a truely life saver. Thank you very much. From Spain ❤
I'm so relieved that I found this. I was struggling with emotional regulation and felt numb like a zombie. I needed a good cry so I could feel my emotions again, and I think this did it.
I love this meditation. I was able to feel the same love I have for my son for my inner child. Bless you and thank you Patrick
In my meditation adult me was wearing my wedding dress. I love my non traditional purple dress. Wearing it makes me feel so beautiful and magical.
I don’t know why but mine didnt speak or respond , and really just looked hazy like couldn’t really see myself .
Beautiful way to start connecting to my inner child and know how to relate to her. I'd like to lie down when doing this meditation though. Is it important to be sitting having one's feet on the ground?
Also, it came spontaneous to place the inner child hand on top of my hand...it feels more real
i didnt think this would make me cry. such an insiteful video, definately saving this vid for later
This triggered me because I was first molested at a park. I was asked if he could hold my hand, hug me, etc. I mentioned that trigger to my therapist today, and now we're going to listen together in her office. I'm looking forward to healing in a safe place with a safe person. Thank you for this.
A lot of guided meditations have gotten on my nerves really quickly - this one stands out to me as actually really calming. Your voice is nice, I liked the music, and could actually focus on other things than how the voice or music felt uncomfortable
This video was life changing. Can you do more inner child meditations? She came with me but now I don't know where to go.
Hi Rebecca, I think it's like Patrick says in the beginning- you will make sure- where ever you go- this child is safe and cared for by you. You might ask, where she would like to go or you suggest to go some place and see if she'd like to go with you. And if she doesn't, just have a safe and relaxing time together- maybe hot chocolate, playing a game, reading her a story. 💁♀️🥰👍
Get well and God bless you.xo
My inner child is so distrusting and naturally skeptical of people’s intentions, and I get it cause I’m still like that. Skeptical but adaptable, I want there to be some middle ground of openness instead of wariness but I acknowledge why this happens
My inner child wanted a hug really bad so I carried them, also we took a train not a car
Ok.... I couldnt stop crying trying to do this. I guess i have a lot of work to do on myself!!! Thank you for being the light. I feel hopeful 💙💙💙
I cried the entire time…
Journaled a lot in this series of your videos! Amazing, P!
Thank you, Patrick, for your wonderful channel. I'm almost on Day 14 of the Inner Child Challenge. I told a few friends on my meditation app to check your challenge out and a couple of them have joined on as well. I get so much peace from hearing you talk and share your learnings. Thank you so much!
this was so amazing. i have severe anxiety and panic disorder, and this meditation brought me so much peace. i have always been uncomfortable with inner child work. this was a wonderful introduction.
My immer child was not ready to trust my own adult self. Wanted to be alone and build tha path..😀
This was interesting. My inner child was very shy and actually hiding behind the tree. But surprisingly very open to me and it was quite comfortable sitting with him. The question of asking him if he wanted to join my family was a bit scary but he said yes quite easily, though still shy. This is great start, very happy for this. Thanks!
This meditation was impactful for me, thank you for sharing this
what if my child wasnt saying yes to anything? out of fear and not being able to trust?
That's OK. Just keep showing up and being safe.
Visualization for me was very difficult. But speaking to myself and listening to my inner child really makes me feel connected. I can tell she isn't ready to come home with me yet. But I'll keep showing her that I am ready to show up for her. I'll keep talking to her everyday.
Well thought out guided meditation.
Thank you so very much for making this accessible for those wanting to optimize their life experience.
I’m 51 and crying like a baby. This was much needed. She was sad, but happy to meet a new friend. I made her smile 😊
I hope my comment will be seen, even though the video is almost 2 years old. I just saw it today (12.22.22). I’m going through a traumatic experience right now as I’m dealing with an elderly parent’s mental health issues and trying to take care of them (I had a good relationship with them growing up and seeing them suffering now is hurting me). Patrick, I’m so glad that you did the body scan first before the actual inner child work. Everything felt alright as I wiggled or clenched different muscles in my body, until I reached the back of my neck, and that’s when I realized I was holding a lot of tension (due to my current situation). I couldn’t stop crying for the rest of the exercise, and yet I was still able to follow along and do my inner child work. My inner child was extremely happy to see me and needed to hold on to me. I suffer from anxiety and my current family situation is giving me great anxiety, so seeing this in my inner child was not surprising at all.
I feel like I was able to acknowledge the hurt both 5 yr old me and adult me are experiencing from my current situation. I have a therapy session later today and will bring up this exercise with my therapist. Thank you Patrick for your lifesaving work.
So, how are you today? I hope it really helped you and you are well and safe. 🙋♀️
it was emitional but really helpful to me
Thank you so much for this!