Hypothetical Match Analysis: a Grizzly Bear vs. a Gorilla
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 ต.ค. 2024
- streamed Dec. 4-7, 2020
In the war between bears and primates, the content creator wins.
Spooncats did the Phoenix Wright thing: Sp...
Follow Sajam on Twitter & Twitch:
/ sajam
/ sajam
/ discord
Editing/Thumbnail by Magic Moste:
/ magicmoste
#FGC
![ILLSLICK - WINTER IS COMING [Official Video]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/dwTMeM1zIhQ/mqdefault.jpg)
"If a gorilla can learn sign language, they can learn martial arts!"
I can't believe how accurate this is to something Phoenix Wright would say.
Then he gets the gorilla to testify
xD
@@amagicalduck155rocking a banzai headband.
Sajam doesn't even play fighting games he's just an anthropologist
Can't wait to see the Daigo parry with king kong and kuma
I can't believe these "Team Gorilla" people are just walking around amongst us pretending to be normal humans.
Maybe we are just walking around pretend that we don't still miss harambe. *zips down the fly*
did you know bears actually have rudimentary techniques for fighting other bears? typically grizzlies in a confrontation will intentionally try to snap the other bears neck by getting both hands on top of the back of their neck and yanking down.
bears have martial arts for real.
Full nelson?
@@helloimvic7451 Nah, thats from behind, this is a Full Noslen,
predator instincts are crazy good at martial arts
"If a gorilla could learn sign language, they could learn ninjutsu"
Compelling argument.
A counter argument:
If bears can learn to dance, they can also learn martial arts.
So who wins? Karate Gorilla or Kung Fu Bear?
If bears can scratch their backs on trees, they can 100% build ar-15s
Bears can survive multiple rifle shots, the layers of fat they have is practically armour. Even if a gorilla had a strap it won't do much.
How do gorillas fare against firearms? Remember Harambe?
Grizzly has this 10-0 free.
RIP Harambe.
What if the gorilla learned how to make a vest outta dried up bananas and tree sap. Your move quadraped.
That only qualifies if items were on and without prep time the bear would just run up and one shot the gorilla before it even started crafting
How a bear can even use a gun
@@bigsmoke9209 bear is a gun
I'm a monkey enthusiast but this is definitely an uphill battle for the gorilla, it would need batman's plot armor
Bro I'm dying at "gorilla with prep time"
That's a question only TierZoo can answer. His videos are legit!
Martial Arts Gorilla vs. Wrestler Bear
It's a rushdown vs. grappler matchup, that shit's not even a fair fight.
The health bar difference, though. 400 for the gorilla. And 1200 for the Grappler. That shit is TRIPLE. One good combo and that boy is GONE
@@tipsybun Also remember that gorillas don't primarily punch, they bite, so they have to try to hold down the grizzly before biting
0:52 you don't need to consider the whole animal kingdom, Sajam, just the top tiers
Pick a top tier.
@@seokkyunhong8812 cheetah
@@destroyerofworlds4663 Cheetah is bottom tier. I understand why people main cheetah - the mobility and rushdown they offer is fun. But the cheetah's HP and damage are so abysmally low that they get bodied if they make even a single mistake. And the rushdown is a bit too linear such that if a gazelle main knows what it's doing, it can easily avoid being put into the corner.
@@Zetact_ Who is a top tier?
@@destroyerofworlds4663 Among big cats? Tigers, Lions, and Jaguars.
Sajam, TierZoo, animal powerscalling and a parody of bulshit Discord arguments on the same video? Instant favourite.
it wasnt a parody, all the lines in spooncats' video was taken directly from the discord argument. i was there myself fighting on the front lines for team bear.
That "ninjutsu" comment had me dying laughing
Fun fact: Polar Bears are one of the only creatures on earth that actively hunt humans for food!
That is probably because humans weren't around to show them who is the boss in the old times. Polar bears are terrifying animals for sure but not as terrifying as we are
I mean, they live in one if not the harshest habitat on earth, anything that moves is prey and shouldnt let it go.
That video is such a work of art. Phoenix even taking the underdog side and making absurd yet compelling arguments is perfect
Yall must've never played against Gorilla Grodd in Injustice 2 and it shows.
Exactly! No body is scared of Kuma/Panda in tekken. Only thing you got to look out for is the bs hurtbox on the legs and reach.
Grodd vs Kuma when?
@@Brass_Heathen It's this kind of mindset that allowed Rangchu to win Tekken World Tour in 2018!
Well if Grodd is said gorilla in this battle, of course he'll win. He could just mindrape the bear into killing itself.
The real question: either a bear or a gorilla vs. Tasty Steve's unbreakable 1-2 arm grab. I vote that Steve dislocates either one's arm.
Wanted to say thanks for this stream specifically. Microsoft word had crashed on me deleting the script to and Xrd video I was making and I was super depressed afterwards, but hearing Gorilla's learning karate cheered me up quick as hell.
I lost a 20,000 word college project to microsoft word once in the weirdest way. It converted every letter, space and punctuation mark into a square. I couldn't recover it.
After that I mained notepad because less can go wrong, and only counter-picked word for the spell check matchup.
Once Google docs was released I dropped Word forever, and still have notepad as a secondary.
@@ShadyHitchhiker Yeah I got friends telling me to switch to docs for the longest time but I didn't because I wanted to stick with what I was familiar with. But after losing the Xrd video I realized it's not worth it to act like a dinosaur and that I should new things especially if they make the work load easier.
@@riku582 Yeah my dude. You gotta get with a word processor that treats you right. Don't keep taking abuse from Microsoft Word.
Use a program that looks at you the way Sajam looks at rollback netcode.
@@ShadyHitchhiker I hear that.
Now this is the kind of drama I subscribed to Sajam for
This is a god tier video and my only regret is that it took 2 months for TH-cam to recommend it to me. Sajam's community be wildin lmfao
Pull up that MU chart, Jamie
Its 10-0 to bears my guy
Gorilla will mash DP on its own wakeup AND the Bear's wakeup mixed in with run up command grabs and jump ins. The gorilla will also obviously lose and blame it on the bear cheating because it kept blocking and punishing or anti-airing instead of slugging it out like a man.
9-1 matchup for the Bear.
I mean when you have the Urien/Sol player admitting the Bear smokes the Gorilla, you know it's a hopeless cause and you should give up.
#Buffcuriousgeorge
Bears don't learn how to wrestle, they know how to. A gorilla might run off or intimidate s bear, but if they actually engage it's gg for the gorilla.
A Gorilla isn't gonna intimidate a Grizzly. Black bears, sure, absolutely. A Grizzly isn't getting chased off by anything that isn't of comparable size, and even then it's likely to try and throw hands first. The only people to survive Grizzly attacks either had weapons or showed submission in the hopes that the bear would accept that it isn't a threat, and even then - that's only if it isn't hungry.
Btw, if the hyppos was in the discussion like you mentioned. They win any matchup free. None of the others can even hurt the the hyppo
The gorilla contingency is only arguing for the gorillas because they themselves have gorilla brains and are trying to move the goalposts in their favor
The gorrila contingent are grappler players, change my mind
@@starsheep1140 Bears and gorillas are both grapplers though, so that still comes down to grappler gorilla VS superior grappler bear
@@starsheep1140 😂😂😂
This is just a thing that lives in my timeline now.
i just want to say that the thumbnail for this video is absolute SSS+ tier
Bears are actually summon characters; they can summon beehives, beef them up to level 3, attack automatically but the pattern is based on your own inputs, use them as preset traps, pick them up and throw them as if they're projectiles (bees still attack afterwards, but theres a chance they'll attack you instead), consume them for hp, etc.
Jack-O isn't Guilty Gear, and the Bear + Bee alliance aren't nature; they should be banned from all tournaments.
Gorillas gonna need those strong arms to hold this L
Bears all the way
Lol, lemme build the poor bear a bridle to drag this L. I'll give it the full treatment of a saddle and stirrups to carry you home to your bed because your obviously drunk if you think monkey man be doing anything but reppin the W.
7:14 the perfect name for a sub at that moment
This has same energy of Kong vs Godzilla arguements
I normally fuckin hate the stupidity of these animal fight things but "gorilla with prep time" had me rolling on the floor hahahahahaha
Have you never seen legendary Takamura vs Bear from the documentary Hajime no Ippo
When you think about it, the matchup really is this debate.
Whose side would win in a debate about who would win in a fight: a 🐻 or a 🐵?
MONKEY
im team bear but there is a chimpanzee that knows karatee
A more interesting match up is grizzly bear vs giant ground sloth, similar playstyle combat and more similar size.
Similar size, I'm afraid, simply isn't true. Giant ground sloths were 11 times larger than grizzly bears, and 3 times longer.
@@erikgrundy my bad
@@erikgrundy Late, but so it's like a grizzly bear vs the guardian ape from Sekiro?
@@nomad5544 I haven't played Sekiro, so I can't say, I'm afraid. Giant ground sloths weren't really much like apes actually - they actually looked a lot like bears, just massive
@@erikgrundy Just looked them up, those things look so crazy, wild that they were a thing at one point
“Gorillas don’t bodybuild so we’ve never seen one at full power.”
~I forgot who said this, but someone did.
idk.. this was the same guy arguing a billion lions have a shot against universe ending pokemon.
If a gorilla has a prep time it's going to eat a banana not learn karate.
This is the same logic from Riki Oh about how to be a warden, you have to be the best at Kung Fu. And then the other guy pulls out a gun that makes you explode.
I didn't expect a Chris Redfield shitpost today.
Ngl im only on Team Gorilla because i love an underdog and because its batshit hilarious seeing people try to come up with a way for a Gorilla to win in a match up thats completely objectively against it lmao
I was on the fence but tierzoo sold me, bears all the way
Also I don’t care how good gorilla’s zoning is, the bear rushdown is too strong, they’re too fast
I like how sajam talking about gorilla mental gymnastics but then just a year ago he did the same to justify 1bill lions beating a pokemon who literally just drown the entire planet or Pokemon god of creation LOL.
This is my favourite sajam video now
got anymore like this sajam love it.
aso yes we love tier zoo..
The gorilla doesn't need to kill the bear, he just needs to inmovilize him with an mma submission
hum, ever heard of Gorilla Tactics ? the bears will never know what hit them
This feels like a Godzilla vs King Kong thing lmfao
I've read "If a gorilla can learn sign language, they can learn martial arts" and I CHOSE to believe it, Sajam. How about that?
OBJECTION!
Martial Arts were designed to fight against other HUMAN opponents. There is no martial arts training for fighting a bear one on one. But Gorillas do in fact fight off other huge animals that have teeth and claws. So I feel like the Gorilla side of the argument is yet to be truly explored. Also has anyone even seen a Gorillas teeth? They most certainly also bite
I've been watching Sajam's video for the past couple of days and I just gotta say no channel should be allowed to be this good 💀💀
Also when will hggGuapo be unbanned so I can come chill in the streams?
Bears outweigh, outmuscle, and have literal knives embedded in their massive paws. No contest.
"If a gorilla can learn sign language, he can learn martial arts."
I love that a Sol player scoffs at this as if it's outside the realm of possibility.
Sajam would love TierZoo, would love to see him react to it
My only criticism of this video is that Phoenix would absolutely be Team Gorilla
TBH, Phoenix’s final assertion is pretty on brand for him.
Now this is the analysis that I've always wanted.
wow haha I thought this gonna be about a face off of hypothetical archetypes in fighting game and wondered what a grizzly bear is in that context xD
Is the thought experiment purely based on 1v1? I'm asking because no one's talking about how gorillas live in GROUPS while grizzly's are mainly solitary animals. I think a bear getting ganked by a bunch of gorillas would be a likely scenario.
Bears can take fucking gunshots to the head without even flinching.
Gorilla played 3rd strilke, has parries for days, nuff said
Bro i am sitting here DYING at this ace attorney shit
Gorilla wins free. Grizzly just hits the gorilla with strong punches that are very strong. The gorilla punches insanely fast with really good strength, albeit not as strong as the gorilla, but the speed allows the gorilla to get one good hit that stuns the grizzly, from which point the gorilla proceeds to show the superior harambe inclusive species.
Sajam not knowing about tier zoo saddens me.
Also grizzly bears have super thick heads. You need decent bullets to actually puncture their head. And they have way more beef to cut through.
Man these are the best, how about a Lion vs. a Bear
Hold your horses, Bear hasn’t won or lost their match yet. Focus on the opponent at hand, don’t go looking at other parts of the bracket.
"if the gorilla has time to prep--" why are you letting it setplay you? RTAD
What people don’t understand is that lifting heavy things doesn’t directly translate to punching, it’s completely different muscles and gorillas more so rely on weight to punch if you see them fight they lead with their shoulder flailing wildly, they aren’t boxers
Bro, the bear can just backdash all of the Gorilla's grabs. Ez
1 angry mother bear fucks up any gorrila ever
Heihachi's partner is Kuma the bear, not a gorilla for a reason.
What about the hippo VS rhino debate?
I feel like it's a 7-3 match_up for the rhino.
I don't know, I feel that one really comes down to what stage they pick. Match up knowledge is also important too.
Rhinos are as dumb as rocks. I'd give it to the hippo
people really do be out there saying "gorilla with prep time could win" like hes fucking batman wtf
This sounds as silly as a billion lions vs one of each of all 800+ pokemon
Sagan knowing about Chrisposting is hilarious
the fact that Team Gorilla people need to have the gorilla to go through a DBZ training montage in order to go against a raw, wild, untrained bear already is proof enough that the bear is winning. Bears are also intelligent. Indigenous tribes all across North America hailed bears for their power and intellect. Bears used to be used in circus shows so they can learn routines. If gorillas are being given the prep time to learn MMA, bears given the same privilege could and would do the same thing.
Wait wait wait, what the heck knocked the hippo into the lower bracket?!
I would pay big money to see a gorilla trained up in the martial arts
Well, it comes down to the tournament format. Gorillas will dominate online events, but bears are heavily favored at in person events.
Y'all just want to fund a kick starter and find out? Buy both animals then split the funds left over for equipment like weights, supplements and training. Meet up in like 8 months a do this damn thing. I already know a gorrila that thinks that kuma was behind the trigger with that whole harambe debacle. Team bear needs to find a bear and tell him that Yoggie pumps boo boo and that A&W made the right move retiring that fool says gorilla. See you in 8 months.
What if the Gorilla has a rock to enhance it's close range melee?
Gorilla gang is wild. This isn’t even a question
But where does a alligator fit into all this??
This is the fgc content I'm here for
If there is one thing I know for certain, its that if you hit anything hard enough it'll fuck off. So honestly this probly wouldn't even be a fight to the death.
Smart money is gorilla takes one look at a grizzly and says fuck this shit, I'm out.
This makes me want to see a gorilla do an atomic buster on a bear
Damn I cant believe we actually returned to monkey
Yeah but Donkey Kong has a coconut gun that fires in spurts.
You could teach a gorilla how to dual-wield glocks and wrestle like Khabib and the grizzly bear would still be a significant problem for it.
Team bear is obviously right but Team Gorrilla is way to lit to not be on their side
Quick question: leopards vs mountain lions?
idk how this is in my feed but holy fuck this video lol
The problem is now I'm thinking of gorilla grodd vs kuma and that's messing up my reasoning
Guess which continent doesn't have bears. Same one gorillas are on. Gorillas killed the African bears, I rest my case
But bears are all around the world not just one continent. Meaning that it is more likely that the opposite is true and that bears killed almost all gorillas which made them have to stay in one continent and not spread out.
@@jojak0512 wooooosh
@@malcolmseabrook8770 I was making a joke too lol. (but seriously though anyone who is team gorilla is just plain stupid)
Gorillas are balanced by nature in a way that favors basic instincts, throwing caution to the wind and wildly throwing out big attacks in order to overwhelm the opponent with relentless aggression.
Bears are balanced by nature in a way that favors advanced strategy, utilizing trickery such as using their fundamentally different body structure and high endurance to their advantage, as well as attacking at opportune moments in order to utterly humiliate their opponents, breaking their spirits and leaving them in utter despair before their imminent demise.
Could a gorilla get a bear by throwing sufficiently big rocks? a crew of gorillas might stand a chance
did i accidentally click on the joe rogan experience?
God damn this video is gold