As a man living with both, it can be living hell. I mostly isolate myself, but I'm brimming with imagination and creativity. So, due to the intensity, it is difficult maintaining and fighting relationships.
Within the last 3 years I also have been diagnosed BPD and later with ADHD and relate to your comment ,I'm 58 now . Sank pretty low to get diagnosed via mental health teams. Also referred last year for ASD assessment ,oddly I have 2 Sons one with ADHD and the other ASD yet I never made a connection even though we are alike lol.
This is such a dense and valuable discussion! For manufactured urgency: Sometimes when I’m cooking food in the microwave, I will run around and get as much tidying done as possible before the timer goes off. Sometimes just setting a timer by itself is enough to get going. It always amazes me how much I can get done in just a few minutes!
Learning to be more self-compassionate has helped me a lot. It helps me to re-regulate my nervous system quicker, and it helps me not to dig myself into an even deeper shame/impulsivity vortex 😅 Thank you so much guys for addressing this topic! 🤗
I falied my whole life fighting D’s and F’s during middle school and high school. I barely graduated. My parents didn’t and still don’t believe in mental health illness, after almost getting myself locked up in decided to get help. I got diagnosed with BPD and ADHD at 22. I felt so relieved after finding out. I I wasn’t slow or stupid, i was just delayed. I took DBT Therapy either meds and it has helped me so much! I still have trouble with budgeting and finances but slowly but surely.
@@Tailionis I’m sorry to hear that. As someone who struggles with depression, I can relate to feeling “bleh” in life. It sucks. But I think it’s also important to remember that it doesn’t have to be like that forever. There are treatments and things which can and do help. Also, I’m sure that everyone in this episode can also relate to feeling low and flat at various time of their lives. What we see in this episode is just a snapshot of their lives, and they’re likely putting on their best faces because it’s a show. What you see here isn’t exactly like real life. I wish you all the best, and I hope you’re able to get the help you need to feel better.
I’ve known I have adhd for awhile, just recently discovered I have bpd after an episode that landed me in a facility. I’m tired of being the way I am, constantly destroying my life and I want to change but whenever I try my brain is like: look at your life so far, clearly you are just on this earth to make it burn. I just want to be a good son to my mom, I don’t deserve her but hopefully learning more about this disorder will help me change.
I got diagnosed with BPD again at 28 during schema therapy. Afterwords, I had a relapse right at the end of the therapy, I got attacked with a beer glass, leaving a scar during a night out during the time period my intensive therapy was ending. A therapist said I sabotaged my own therapy process. I got another therapist who said that statement was way too harsh and that schema therapy was too much of the willpower technique, and I finally got an ADHD diagnosis at 32. Does anyone get really confused when different therapists all say something else? I get like, What am I supposed to think anymore? Some are really focused on behavioral change, and others are more about acceptance.
Just found your channel via a recommendation in a bpd subreddit, oh wow, I've never had ANYONE to talk with about having ADHD and bpd at the same time and this is helping so much.
*listening to this as I frantically clean the house before people come over this evening* Me: I think I need to talk to my therapist about ADHD next session. Lol
I've been learning more about what BPD means to me since my diagnosis earlier this year, and decided to search bpd adhd and found this channel. I was diagnosed with adhd around 3 years ago which was freeing, but learning more about people with both bpd and adhd feels like a hug for my inner child who has struggled so long to feel understood. Can't wait to watch more from this bunch!
ive had my adhd diagnosis for a few years now, but im starting to recognize some other problems that ive dealt with for a long time as bpd. ive struggled believing that i might have certain mental health problems after a childhood of invalidation and adulthood of 'just stop and be normal already', but hearing so many instances of relatability in this episode has been very helpful in trusting myself. thank you!
So sad and frustrating that I got a diagnosed with ADHD when I was a kid I'm guessing it was the late seventies and then BPD when I was probably in my thirties. I'm now 56. there's so much more information out now about it that would have been so helpful to know. Ugh! I appreciate you saying I need to do this right now! Because I definitely have that
It's so draining. Brain works so fast at times. Probably because of so many instances of "urgent action" I'd love to have enough interest to plan and schedule better but it bores me so much. My head remembers what I need to do but documenting and planning is almost painful. I can communicate so fluently in conversation but planning is like my brain is in slow motion unless I have ultimate responsibility and people rely on me that I am motivated because of the shame of letting people down if I don't. Relate to the cleaning comments too. Read my School report and comments such as "she can be eager to rush into situations, a calmer approach would benefit her." "She must begin to improve her levels of concentration" " She must listen more intently and ask for help" " tends to talk rather too much in many lessons, concentration should be sharper" "Contributes in class discussion but needs to listen more in Group tasks" "Individual tasks require more preparation" "She needs to concentrate more and be more consistent" " can contribute well to lessons but can at times distract others from tasks" "I would instruct her to listen to instructions more carefully" ( comments made by multiple Teacher when I was 12) never picked up...
This was really eye opening for me. I feel so validated by all of your experiences. It’s confirmed a suspicion I’ve had for myself that I’m going to follow up. Thankyou so much
Ive naturally gravitated to other neruodivergent people and due to that i have an amazing small group of friends who ive been able to be myself and have my withdraw moments without any negativity. My best friend ever i see 1 every year and we are both so content
I relate a little. I believe i have inattentive adhd with a little hyper. I also think i have ocd. I’m more than positive i have ocd the pure toe with obsessive intrusive thoughts with compulsions since i was in grade school that has gone through different stages. I also think i have some other mental illness. I relate with some symptoms of bpd but I’m not sure that’s it. I’m 47 and having the hardest time with emotions and thoughts. Stress doubt exacerbates it and stress gets exacerbated as as well as ideas imagined and real. I miss details a lot especially on paper. I notice things most people don’t a lot of the time and don’t notice things most people do. My emotions are getting out of control. I saw a psych lady week and were starting the medication and diagnosis journey. He started me on caplyta.
I found being medicated for ADHD generally improved my BPD symptoms, because a lot of my ADHD and BPD are very heavily intertwined. Unfortunately, as time has gone on, I’ve become a lot more sensitive to the anxiety-inducing aspect of my ADHD meds, and so I have drastically reduced how much I take and focus more on lifestyle changes to manage my ADHD
I have been prescribed almost everything under the sun at various times, and the vast majority of it made me sick and was not helpful. There were a few drugs that I took for a while that I found helpful. I was prescribed Seroquel (an atypical antipsychotic) for BPD symptoms. I can’t remember specifically which symptom it was supposed to treat (I think mood), but the thing I liked about was that allowed me to manually regulate my sleep schedule at a time when staying consistent with sleep was really difficult. Getting off of it was a nightmare. It took me a year for my brain to get back to normal. I used to take Prozac in my teens, which helped a little bit for depression, but stopped taking it in my 20s because it started to make me feel extremely aggressive. The only long-term medication that never gave me any problems was Trileptal, which is an anti-seizure medication that was being used off label for mood stabilizer. It was very effective and the only reason I’m not on it anymore is because I think my skills are sufficient to manage my condition and I don’t want to be taking a drug that I don’t need to take. For ADHD I have been on Adderall and Vyvanse. I was on Adderall for the most amount of time, almost 10 years until the shortage and then I switched to Vyvanse. Honestly I wish I’d switch to Vyvanse earlier because, as I’ve gotten older, Adderall has made me more and more anxious. Vyvanse still makes me anxious, but not quite as much. but currently, I am focusing mostly on lifestyle changes to manage my ADHD and only taking the Vyvanse when needed, so not every day
As a man living with both, it can be living hell. I mostly isolate myself, but I'm brimming with imagination and creativity. So, due to the intensity, it is difficult maintaining and fighting relationships.
Within the last 3 years I also have been diagnosed BPD and later with ADHD and relate to your comment ,I'm 58 now . Sank pretty low to get diagnosed via mental health teams. Also referred last year for ASD assessment ,oddly I have 2 Sons one with ADHD and the other ASD yet I never made a connection even though we are alike lol.
This is such a dense and valuable discussion!
For manufactured urgency: Sometimes when I’m cooking food in the microwave, I will run around and get as much tidying done as possible before the timer goes off. Sometimes just setting a timer by itself is enough to get going. It always amazes me how much I can get done in just a few minutes!
Learning to be more self-compassionate has helped me a lot. It helps me to re-regulate my nervous system quicker, and it helps me not to dig myself into an even deeper shame/impulsivity vortex 😅 Thank you so much guys for addressing this topic! 🤗
6:27 this is the third time I’m Rewatching this bit because I keep losing focus.
This is a good reminder that, while there may be right things to do, there is no one right way to do them.
I falied my whole life fighting D’s and F’s during middle school and high school. I barely graduated. My parents didn’t and still don’t believe in mental health illness, after almost getting myself locked up in decided to get help. I got diagnosed with BPD and ADHD at 22. I felt so relieved after finding out. I I wasn’t slow or stupid, i was just delayed. I took DBT Therapy either meds and it has helped me so much! I still have trouble with budgeting and finances but slowly but surely.
I resonated with all of your guys' discussion. I so appreciate this youtube channel and community.
Yeah, it’s a really cool project.
I can't. They are way too giddy and happy. I'm just bleh in life. Live and avoid pain. It's all I resonate with.
@@Tailionis I’m sorry to hear that. As someone who struggles with depression, I can relate to feeling “bleh” in life. It sucks. But I think it’s also important to remember that it doesn’t have to be like that forever. There are treatments and things which can and do help. Also, I’m sure that everyone in this episode can also relate to feeling low and flat at various time of their lives. What we see in this episode is just a snapshot of their lives, and they’re likely putting on their best faces because it’s a show. What you see here isn’t exactly like real life.
I wish you all the best, and I hope you’re able to get the help you need to feel better.
I’ve known I have adhd for awhile, just recently discovered I have bpd after an episode that landed me in a facility. I’m tired of being the way I am, constantly destroying my life and I want to change but whenever I try my brain is like: look at your life so far, clearly you are just on this earth to make it burn. I just want to be a good son to my mom, I don’t deserve her but hopefully learning more about this disorder will help me change.
I got diagnosed with BPD again at 28 during schema therapy. Afterwords, I had a relapse right at the end of the therapy, I got attacked with a beer glass, leaving a scar during a night out during the time period my intensive therapy was ending. A therapist said I sabotaged my own therapy process. I got another therapist who said that statement was way too harsh and that schema therapy was too much of the willpower technique, and I finally got an ADHD diagnosis at 32. Does anyone get really confused when different therapists all say something else? I get like, What am I supposed to think anymore? Some are really focused on behavioral change, and others are more about acceptance.
Just found your channel via a recommendation in a bpd subreddit, oh wow, I've never had ANYONE to talk with about having ADHD and bpd at the same time and this is helping so much.
Just stumbled upon this after scouring youtube and wow its great! Feel like I'm in the call myself. Thanks you guys!
*listening to this as I frantically clean the house before people come over this evening* Me: I think I need to talk to my therapist about ADHD next session. Lol
I've been learning more about what BPD means to me since my diagnosis earlier this year, and decided to search bpd adhd and found this channel. I was diagnosed with adhd around 3 years ago which was freeing, but learning more about people with both bpd and adhd feels like a hug for my inner child who has struggled so long to feel understood. Can't wait to watch more from this bunch!
I’m so glad I came across this Chanel
ive had my adhd diagnosis for a few years now, but im starting to recognize some other problems that ive dealt with for a long time as bpd. ive struggled believing that i might have certain mental health problems after a childhood of invalidation and adulthood of 'just stop and be normal already', but hearing so many instances of relatability in this episode has been very helpful in trusting myself. thank you!
You’re welcome!
So sad and frustrating that I got a diagnosed with ADHD when I was a kid I'm guessing it was the late seventies and then BPD when I was probably in my thirties. I'm now 56. there's so much more information out now about it that would have been so helpful to know. Ugh! I appreciate you saying I need to do this right now! Because I definitely have that
It's so draining. Brain works so fast at times. Probably because of so many instances of "urgent action" I'd love to have enough interest to plan and schedule better but it bores me so much. My head remembers what I need to do but documenting and planning is almost painful. I can communicate so fluently in conversation but planning is like my brain is in slow motion unless I have ultimate responsibility and people rely on me that I am motivated because of the shame of letting people down if I don't. Relate to the cleaning comments too. Read my School report and comments such as "she can be eager to rush into situations, a calmer approach would benefit her." "She must begin to improve her levels of concentration" " She must listen more intently and ask for help" " tends to talk rather too much in many lessons, concentration should be sharper" "Contributes in class discussion but needs to listen more in Group tasks" "Individual tasks require more preparation" "She needs to concentrate more and be more consistent" " can contribute well to lessons but can at times distract others from tasks" "I would instruct her to listen to instructions more carefully" ( comments made by multiple Teacher when I was 12) never picked up...
Nice to see Jess and Alex back...another great episode...keep up the great work ❤
This was really eye opening for me. I feel so validated by all of your experiences. It’s confirmed a suspicion I’ve had for myself that I’m going to follow up. Thankyou so much
Woohoo!!!! New season drop! #BPD
Thank you so much for this episode, so relatable. Donated on your page
Bruh i feel validated for once in my life thank u for these videos
Ive naturally gravitated to other neruodivergent people and due to that i have an amazing small group of friends who ive been able to be myself and have my withdraw moments without any negativity. My best friend ever i see 1 every year and we are both so content
I'm inattentive and not hyperactive, so I didn't get an adhd diagnosis.
I am from Australia as i have go BPD and ADHD as well ,ADHD at 7 and BPD at24 ans i been on 100g of Zoloft since as now iam in my 40's
I relate a little. I believe i have inattentive adhd with a little hyper. I also think i have ocd. I’m more than positive i have ocd the pure toe with obsessive intrusive thoughts with compulsions since i was in grade school that has gone through different stages. I also think i have some other mental illness. I relate with some symptoms of bpd but I’m not sure that’s it. I’m 47 and having the hardest time with emotions and thoughts. Stress doubt exacerbates it and stress gets exacerbated as as well as ideas imagined and real. I miss details a lot especially on paper. I notice things most people don’t a lot of the time and don’t notice things most people do. My emotions are getting out of control. I saw a psych lady week and were starting the medication and diagnosis journey. He started me on caplyta.
I was wondering if when you medicate for adhd does it make your BPD symptoms more pronounced? For me it’s a slippery slope
I found being medicated for ADHD generally improved my BPD symptoms, because a lot of my ADHD and BPD are very heavily intertwined. Unfortunately, as time has gone on, I’ve become a lot more sensitive to the anxiety-inducing aspect of my ADHD meds, and so I have drastically reduced how much I take and focus more on lifestyle changes to manage my ADHD
Yes
what meds have people found helpful?
Are you asking more about the ADHD side or the BPD side?
Both and in what combinations
I have been prescribed almost everything under the sun at various times, and the vast majority of it made me sick and was not helpful.
There were a few drugs that I took for a while that I found helpful.
I was prescribed Seroquel (an atypical antipsychotic) for BPD symptoms. I can’t remember specifically which symptom it was supposed to treat (I think mood), but the thing I liked about was that allowed me to manually regulate my sleep schedule at a time when staying consistent with sleep was really difficult. Getting off of it was a nightmare. It took me a year for my brain to get back to normal.
I used to take Prozac in my teens, which helped a little bit for depression, but stopped taking it in my 20s because it started to make me feel extremely aggressive.
The only long-term medication that never gave me any problems was Trileptal, which is an anti-seizure medication that was being used off label for mood stabilizer. It was very effective and the only reason I’m not on it anymore is because I think my skills are sufficient to manage my condition and I don’t want to be taking a drug that I don’t need to take.
For ADHD I have been on Adderall and Vyvanse. I was on Adderall for the most amount of time, almost 10 years until the shortage and then I switched to Vyvanse. Honestly I wish I’d switch to Vyvanse earlier because, as I’ve gotten older, Adderall has made me more and more anxious. Vyvanse still makes me anxious, but not quite as much. but currently, I am focusing mostly on lifestyle changes to manage my ADHD and only taking the Vyvanse when needed, so not every day
❤
I wish I had the support from any partner, yet I keep finding men who cant love me how my brain needs. :(