@@sbwlearning1372 hot take that everyone is afraid of liking but they know this is an issue. Lol. Certain fields, they are good in. Many others, they are nothing but a problem. There are some really smart, logical women out there, though, and they belong in the work place.
@@chingizzhylkybayev8575 Actually he did give her an answer, it's just not the answer she wanted and he helped her fix the problem. First of all she assumed that the website wasn't working instead of understanding that her computer had caused a log jam. He showed her how to clear that log jam, explaining why it happened. Her problem is that she assumed that she had framed a simple question. What she really did was just make a wrong assumption. The simple question would have been, can you access the website because I can't. and his answer would probably been yes.
@@chingizzhylkybayev8575having worked in IT for a number of years, you have no idea how computer illiterate most people are.... Having to explain a keyboard has to be plugged in, in order for it to work, that unplugging a PC to use the hoover whilst working at home will shut your PC down.....or that no, your mouse is not likely to work after you put it in the dishwasher because it was sticky, is not an IT fault..... Yeah..... Over time, you do stop treating people a little like they have a clue, as you come across soooooo many who don't....each and every single day..... In this instance he just explained why the issue had occurred, if she was IT savvy, she'd have known this herself, anyone who knows anything about computers understands you occasionally need to clear caches and things, she didn't, and as such he could have just fixed it, only to find himself back there doing it again a few months down the line... So annoyed as she might feel at this, at least she learnt something, and chances are, bet your last penny, a colleague will have this same.issue, and she will use that knowledge to fix the problem, and show how "IT savvy" she is to her colleagues lol 😂
This skit does not provide an example of the mansplaining thing. It is the getting a child like answer that is the main part of the mansplain concept annoyance.
As a non-web developer. I agree. I have no idea what is happening, but if I light these scented candles, make sure my view of the moon is precisely offset at 3*, the website will work for 5 seconds before I must reset preperations. That or it finally loaded and I hit refresh at the wrong time.
I got an HR complaint from a female intern that I “mansplained” something to her. It was how to run a basic report so that she could submit it to my VP’s. I explained it to her 3 times and the 4th time i made a pre recorded video and shared it with her. She said that i “mansplained” it to her in the video. I shared it with HR and they had a good laugh out of it.
There is no word I hate more than “mansplaining”. It was supposed to be when a man who knew less than a woman explained things she already knew (like a regular guy explaining surgery to a surgeon). Now, it’s any time a man tries to explain or teach a woman anything. A woman said I was mansplaining something to her once. I asked her what she did and she said marketing or something, and I responded with “ok, so if I was telling you about marketing, then that would be mansplaining. But since I’m talking about psychology, the field I studied for over a decade, hold three degrees in, and am a professor of, I’m not mansplaining, I’m teaching, and if you aren’t smart enough to understand the difference, I feel sorry for you.” There is nothing more satisfying than putting someone in their place.
…it’s somewhat understandable but at the same time… like tf? We are trying to teach you how to resolve the issue in case it happens again and that you can gain more independence instead of wasting time trying to figure it out on your own
@akiriathorsteinson7611 yea, especially if it's a simple problem. If I notice a solution to a problem we have e had at work and it's easy to fix, I'll try to teach others how to fix it when it occurs do that people learn over time...I don't see any problem with that. If it's simple enough to fix thst I can show anyone then it's not to hard to get yourself.
I'm a man who works in IT Support. I generally try to educate the users about their issue instead of just fixing the problem, because next time they'll be able to fix it themselves which will be much quicker. If they can fix it themselves in a few minutes they'll be less downtime for them then if they have to wait for us because we may have a backlog and be busy. I'm trying to decrease downtime for them.
Also work IT 100% agree. A small explanation usually saves you hours of calls in the future because now the clients you support are more knowledgeable about technology.
@@Rievven Those people are usually slacking across the board and are quickly looking for new jobs and make up a tiny percentage of people I actually encounter in my city. Also it’s generally just bad idea to waste the time or piss off the IT department. lol
You should almost never believe what woman says she wants, she usually doesn't even know it consciously and says the thing that creates cohesion in the group.
As a man, if I ask someone a question like this, I never get some longwinded tirade because other guys don't feel the need to impress me. I'm genuinely sorry for the people in your life if you respond to every question by dumping the contents of your brain onto them.
I always start out with "do you want the short answer or long answer?" Sometimes people are surprised i give them the long answer they asked for....damned if you do damned if you dont.
Yes but you have to make sure they consent listening to your question beforehand. and also they have to consent you asking for consent. And again, the consent for asking for consent. And again and again and .. you know just ignore them.
Consent is everything, right? Ladies, you can't be mansplained to without _our_ consent to see you as teachable. Want us to give up? _Revoke the consent._ Isn't that so, @@monsieurkeyboard?
@@StarBellySneetchActually the company I work for does hire more women even without the right qualifications because they want to meet a diversity quota over qualified candidates.
@@jamespruitt6718 Ah, so you too know the pain of doing the work of three people, and getting a worse evaluation than the people whose slack you take up.
@@danmac6185yea that type of work environment is disgusting and there's no excuse as to why jobs are forced to hire unqualified ppl regardless of their gender just to fit certain quotas... I'm surprised they are able to keep anyone with legitimate skill if they are having to pick up that much slack .
I was an oil man for 20 years and I would get this exact attitude from women homeowners asking me why their furnace isn't working and what am I going to do to fix it. They would angrily demand these answers and as I would start to explain I would get cut off "I don't care about that! What are you going to do to fix it and make sure it doesn't happen again?" I would start answering that question and again be cut off demanding I explained why it happened in the first place. One woman did this to me so bad I eventually cut her off and told her that she should be happy that I am there because I am the person who found the problem that was caused by another company and I am now going to fix it so that her house will stay cozy warm and that she should be making a batch of those pancakes I could smell to thank me for saving her household from being cold. That's when her husband decided to speak up and shooed her away so that I could get to work on the furnace.
I kinda get it, as a dev when I get asked about something I just give a very broad answer and try to stay away from specifics, until I know people are actually interested in the answer
Women don’t know the difference between a right and a privilege. The fact that he own husband had to shoo her away into the kitchen proves Feminism is a plague
@@carlospinto5845 I think their comments is meant to show how the conversation would've went if the girl dressed in white's coworker had given her the "simple" answer (the short answer). It is meant to show that the "simple" answer wouldn't have helped, while educating her on the problem would've not only helped her this time, but in all the future times where this might occur
I honestly prefer journaling to venting. Journals don’t: blabber unless looked in, get angry, get burnt out, forget, or do anything other than be a writing surface.
“I just wanted to vent.” … Then word it differently because it sounds like you only said that because you got caught in your own argument when you realized the other party had a point.
Nah but sometimes you just want to vent. Doesn’t apply when you’re completely wrong but sometimes the other person actually agrees with you and wants to help you find solutions. Which is nice of them but sometimes I have already thought about solutions and just want to let out my anger before moving on and putting them into action.
99.999% of the time if a women goes to you with a problem or a complaint she is not looking to fix anything. At best she is looking to vent and normally she is just looking to have her thoughts and emotions validated and nothing else.
Wow. That's the first time i've never heard it called the fatherly instinct before but, you might be right. I train hospital users how to use their timekeeping and scheduling system and follow the teach a man to fish philosophy. I'll never do things for them but, I have no problem walking them through how to fix their own problems every time. For the most part they like it but, there's always some who expect you to do it for them.
Also women: “Men won’t mentor us anymore!” Um, yeah. Between this shit and the potential HR nightmare because she decided that “good morning” was over the line, men don’t want to be anywhere near the dice you’re asking them to roll. One thing to keep in mind is that if a guy is explaining the stuff already known, he _might_ just be rolling through his mental flowchart to reach the part that is causing trouble. Maybe let the dude cook a bit.
yeah exactly, if i have a problem i start at the end i want working and work backwards at possible fail points to see what may or may not be working, and sometimes i have to say it out loud so i remember i did it
"i was just venting" The fucking shudder of rage that shook my spine... When you try to help a problem but then they refuse the advice and your inquire why and then they just throw that line in your face like a cloud of sand to the eyes and run off
I got a very strong urge to headbutt something when I heard that. I stopped listening to that part of my brain decades ago, but it still makes itself known sometimes.
I think it was "The Dadvocate" who said, women don't want an answer, they just want to be listened to while they complain. Don't offer an answer, just agree that it sucks.
@@robby1816 True but when you do that, Sometimes they then curve ball and you and berate you for NOT offering a solution, (Will say though, I love the Dadvocate, and it has helped me alot with communication with my partner, but damn some people just, suck.)
I was a superuser at my previous job. If anyone accused me of mansplaining when I was explaining basics so she didn't repeat the same dumb shit & need help again, I'd reply with "You're a strong independent woman, you don't need my help. I'm going back to my work."
@@Aeternus_Noxso you're proving that you're condescending here. If one person calls you an a-hole, they're probably the a-hole. If everyone is doing it, it's probably you
I get this all the time when my wife asks what's wrong with her truck. And I try to give her the long answer and I get the I don't care as long as it gets fixed.
So a guy teaching you something you didn't know is a bad thing? How dare he assume you were interested in knowledge, intelligent enough to understand, and bothering to take the time to explain it to you.
Ikr? How dare he assume she's a strong independent woman willing to know how to fix the problem herself next time! How can she be a damsel in distress after that?
So lesson learned, don't teach women anything. Just one word answers. Unless it's YOUR woman then open up just a little bit, and be emotional? With her? Idk man.
That’s not what mansplaining is. Mansplaining is when a man explains something we didn’t ask him to. Like I’m deciding between two dvd players and a random guy comes up to tell me which one is better and why.
@@jaybee4288 Womansplaining: Condescending explanation of something by a woman, particularly to a man. Mansplaining: Condescending explanation of something by a man, particularly to a woman. It’s not just simply a man explaining something you didn’t ask him to. You could have asked him.
Ex military here... if a squad member or officer asks a question, I give as full a sit-rep (situation report) as I can, in as few words as I can, so they are FULLY INFORMED and can therefore make BETTER DECISIONS QUICKLY. You don't like mansplaining? ... THEN STAY IGNORANT!
So if an officer asks you why the showers aren't clean, you give a 30-minute explanation fo all the various reasons that COULD have led to the showers not being clean? I seriously doubt that...
@@hannahk.598why the showers aren’t working and why is this website not working are not simple questions there’s a massive variety of reasons why either could be broken
I am so offended that you mansplained that "sit-rep" means "situation report". I mean, sure, I didn't know, and now I've learned something, but I'm still offended, right? (In case it's not obvious I'm being ironic.)
*sigh* 😮💨 a part of me wants to help when asked because it’s the right thing to do also a part of me thinks they’re social hacking to take advantage of kindness to have someone else do their job for them 🧐 Yes/No answers as much as possible, and avoiding women coworkers especially if you are a man regardless of your sexual orientation
Mentor a female co-worker? Why? They generally don't appreciate it. Seldom are they are they truely grateful. BTDT. And you run the risk of getting charged with sexual harassment. It is not worth it.
It’s crazy that there are so many men in our offices anyway. Y’all need to get back out into the world and build roads and fight wars and stuff. We need to bring back national service, men really struggle without it. Office jobs are for women.
Exactly, they want to give you everything you need to solve it yourself next time because guys are driven to be competent and assume others want to be competent too and not have to rely on others
@@justkev1044 because people are fucking stupid and arrogant and think that just because its someones job means they want to do it like they themselves aren't stuck in a dead-end job that pays minimum wage and treats them like shit
@@lastguardianofthedyinglight no. Asking for help is when you can’t figure out how to do it yourself. If you can do it yourself and you are allowed to, you do it yourself, that’s called being independent. If you ask someone to do it for you because you don’t want to do it, unless you literally lack time to do it, that’s not asking for help. That is being lazy. Sorry to break it to you. It must be far from indecent though, seeing how so many people do it without a care.
@@cheekfinesserand somehow THEY are always good at communicating. I pointed to my wife that she transmits, not communicates. She does not consider the concept of interference and reciever. In other words, a woman designed communication tower would transmit at a unique out of band frequency that is susceptable to most normal enviromental conditions that no reciever built can intercept and it will still be the man's fault.
@@anvil3589basically yes, they only want one way "talking" that align with them If you disagree even slightly, they will somehow shift to "you not listening to me" But definitely depend on that person persona, my wife is a whole different species than girls I dated before
This should go viral. My sister took her car to the mechanics because of “noises”. He tested it, explaining what was wrong and she just replied “fix it, don’t mansplain it to me.”
As a man with a wife and daughter who aren’t handy at all. I try to explain to them how to do everything they ask me to do. They say we have you for that. So I tell them you won’t always.
This is every single female I have worked with in the machine shop for the last 8 years. I have been there for 19 years now, and the first 8, they actually listened and executed what I have said. In the last 8 years, it is like pulling teeth to get them to listen. Then they keep asking the same question and wonder why I get upset or get an attitude and then tell management I am "hard to work with" None of the women have lasted more than 3 years in this shop.
bruh, my sis works as team leader at huge corpo. She was once accused of mansplaining by her subordinate that had no clue what to do in her job. Sister told me that with every business specific word she used the girl was opening her mouth wider and wider :D
@Sajgoniarz Whats your sister's logic? A subordinate has no know how, yet your sister explains with more and more "business words" she doesn't understand? Your sister is the one at fault for lacking communication skills. People like the subordinate are people you need to account for and find other ways of getting the point across by understanding what they expect.
Every single one for 8 years. Yeah, hate to break it to you but not everyone working your job would have that issue, it lies on your communication skills with impatient, low-attention individuals - it is a reflection on you, not them. What does getting upset accomplish when you give the same answer to their repetitive questions instead of approaching it differently? Humans in general are entitled beings who blame others when they are not behaving the way they expect, we all have to deal with that.
@@kevinzhang6623 it was not a position for some greenhorn. My sister were looking for assistant ASAP and requirements were pretty high including diploma and some certification. She had to break down every definition for the new girl, while it was impossible to get certification without knowing them. Tools, flows etc. was also an industry standard. My sister could not believe how she could slip through interview. And in terms of communication... there is a reason why some "taskforces" are bring together based on communication types of individuals, since sometimes you can't afford miscommunication, or time required for putting everybody on the same page.
I’m an industrial electrician who does side work occasionally. I’m used to speaking to men. A coworker of my wife asked if I could look at their remodel service so I went there and saw they had used one neutral through the whole shebang. I told her she can’t do that, she she asked why. I started to explain when she cuts me off to say it doesn’t matter, it’ll work, won’t it? Sure have it. The reason you don’t share neutrals is because of harmonics from computer processors. She didn’t listen, and overloaded the neutral which fried her smart TV and other devices. She was complaining to my wife that I didn’t tell her why she shouldn’t do that.
Just say "it can hurt stuff" Any more technical than that and they won't listen unless they're in the industry themselves (at which point, they listen better than men 😂)
@@Nomo-sapiens I've had to do this with managers and bosses at work. I'm a software engineer with IT knowledge and sometimes they hire managers who have ZERO knowledge at all. And yeah, you have to explain it like they're an orc. Even children grasp things better than some of the people I've had to work under. Thankfully, they usually don't grasp sarcasm very well either.
This is what a man hears, "I don't want to learn how to solve MY problems I want YOU to come and solve the exact same problem every time" so strong, so independent...
To be fair, is it HER problem? We don't have any background, don't know if she needs to use that website often or just very rarely to get some information. And generally: If a website is actually down, it's most likely not a problem with cookies. And if that website is down often, it's a company problem and not her job to play tech support every week I personally like to search for solutions first before I call tech support and I do ask if they want to teach me how to solve it if I know that this problem likely occurs again in the future. But I would be annoyed too if the tech support person goes in a 30 minute monologue about all the things that COULD be the problem if it's not even clear that I have to ever deal with that problem again. I don't need a 30 minute training session for a problem that might never occure again, I have my own job that doesn't include tech support training time slots. That's like me going to the hiring manager to give him a whole lecture about how social security works when he simply asked about a minor error in his salary slip.
My mom is a verbal processor. Recently, I've taken to dragging her to _my_ point first, leaving absolutely no uncertainty in my wake, and then apologizing and smoothing things over after the fact. Repeating as necessary only until I've finally dug out all my old poisoned wells. Already a solid 80% of the way done now, I think. 🙂
These are typical responses from IT. They need to know what buttons you pushed, what signals you got, what sites you were on. I've been mansplained to, and it does stink. I'm a muralist, and was working with a friend to just repaint a room. Nothing fancy, but he sat there telling me how to care for his brushes, how to wipe the paint, use as little as possible, and how to cut into corners. I was done. He knows my skills, but he was acting like I was a child. I reminded him I'm a professional artist, I've prepped, primed and painted rooms before doing a mural. I painted all the walls in my house, and I know what I'm doing. He hired me because he knew my skills were good, but this micromanaging was too much. I left him, walked off the job, and haven't spoken to him since.
That isn't mansplaining to a woman. That is the way men communicate to all people. You said he already knew you were competent. He was reviewing the facts to make sure there was no misunderstanding between the both of you. If that bothered you then fine, it's your choice to leave. He didn't have to hire you and probably regretted his choice. My personal guess is he will never hire a woman again.
Women don't want to learn how to fish and to feed themselves. They want just the fish for free and someone feeds them the whole life if they demand it.
No, the most frustrating part is that they used a gendered term to name a behaviour all genders do. I've been "mansplained" by female friends over house chores despite living alone for years. PS. The worst "mansplaining" is women telling men what a "real man" should do.
@Dapryor As a woman: Thank you! I prefer to have the issue broken down for me so I can fix it later if it happens again. That way, I save time and money.
@@alexisblack8921 I hate it when someone acts like anything in life is all or nothing. Not all cops are bad, not all dogs bite. And not all men are assholes just as not all women are gold diggers. It’s unintelligent to paint the world as black and white.
@@alexisblack8921 That kind of woman or really that kind of person I do like to help. I am a lead senior network engineer. So I get people asking for my help often. Most of the time it’s something they can fix on their own & is not my responsibility. So I don’t mind telling them what to do. It’s only women that demand I fix it my self. Which isn’t my job & I don’t care. They want to learn how to fix it then self I will tell them. They demand I fix it go out in a ticket with the help desk. I have a whole company I am in charge of not your browser issue.
Annoyance in response to another individual after they tell you stuff you had no idea about, is a symptom of pride. It hurts when somebody you thought beneath you starts teaching you.
@@kevinzhang6623 Yes. Truly mature, to regress to the level of a child, because of 1 incident/exchange, with 1 individual. Especially, when they probably treat most everyone like a child, or something about the ”mature” individual’s behaviour etc. warrants treating them like a child. 😅
As a middle-aged guy, I can 💯 relate. I have a tendency to explain how a clock works when all my gf wanted to know was what time it was Fortunately, she's good-natured about it. Love your work!
I learnt the hard way that most of the time women aren't actually looking for a solution, but just for emotional support for their problem. So guys: if your coworker doesn't ACTUALLY ASK FOR HELP, DON'T OFFER IT. Otherwise the problem will be your fault faster than you can say "because".
That's not a bad way to tie what women mostly want into the male way of thinking. We prize clear communication. So don't offer anything they don't clearly ask for. Win/win.
@@randomobserver8168 Totally. But it's not a contest. I see it more as adapting to the female way of thinking: not solution-based, but personality-based. It's hard for many people (not just men) to understand, but if a woman struggles with a problem and you jump to the solution at once, she feels ignored and thinks the "technology" is more interesting than she is. Don't. Console her, repeat the problem statement (= show you were listening), agree to her that this is crap / shit / bad design / hard to understand, whatever it is. But DO NOT suggest solutions unless she explicitly asks for help. She may see it as if you didn't think she could solve it by herself. Venting anger is not asking for help.
@@96vipul Nah, it's not "exactly" what he said. It's a comment on what he said, followed by a supporting restatement of what he said. That serves a purpose even if not for you.
But that doesn’t represent this example. Ok, maybe the direct one where lady A is talking to lady B. In that case, yes, lady A doesn’t want the explanation. But in the scenario lady A was talking about, what? She just wanted the guy to agree with her it was a terrible thing and affirm her feelings? I this case, the thing was affecting her work and she needed it to stop, and like the guy implied, unless she knew why and how, it would happen again.
Give a woman a fish and she will complained that it's not a premade meal. Teach her how to fish and you have 7 missed called from HR and a warrant for sexual assault somehow
This is an excellent insight by a woman. And she is spot on for guys like me. My wife has accused of answering her “in a looooong round-about way”…I’m just trying my best to communicate…And giving the big picture WITH DETAILS matters.
Absolutely true! However when my hubby dies he got a big enough insurance I can just hire an expert to get it fixed the next day instead of waiting 2 years for a 30 min job that he insisted on doing himself because it saves money. Meanwhile I have to conect and disconnect my car battery every time I drive because the battery keeps draining. Meanwhile I could explain till kingdom come how.to.sew a button or hem pants and he looks at me like I'm speaking mandarin. Believe me I love my hubby of 40 yrs and I'm happy to divide work according to our preferences and expertise but the procrastination is probably going to kill me. Anyway , If I die first I won't have to cook clean mend raising kids while tend grandkids etc. and he can hire the dozen people to replace me. I asked for a door for my living room to keep our kids cats. I asked if it was OK and got the nod. I wanted a slidding barn style ddor. 10 years later and multiple carpet accidents I'm waiting. No, I can't get rid of the cats. It would break my kids heart.
@@melaneephillips8721 you want to know the trick for that? Just start doing it yourself. Buy some wood and a track, and whatever parts you need, and start trying to build one yourself. As soon as he sees what you’re doing, his instincts will kick in, and he’ll criticize the job you’re doing, and then he’ll take it over himself. We men are all procrastinators, with a million excuses, and sometimes we need a guilt trip or a kick in the ass to get going. It’s like reverse psychology. My dad is the same way. When my mom has been waiting forever for something to get done, she calls me, I come over and start doing the job, he ends up feeling guilty about it, and finishes it himself, or helps me finish it. Works every single time, without fail. And if it’s something simple, like putting up a shelf, my mom will do it herself, incorrectly of course, and he’ll say “no, no, what are you doing? You didn’t even drill into a stud! Just give me the drill, I’ll do it.” Lol. You’re welcome. Enjoy your new barn door!
And ....we men are not stupid ladies. We learn from our experiences. The next time you ask that man for help , don't be surprised if he says, " I'm kinda busy right now, go ask Sue."
@BobTheTrueCactus oh they do, one girl in my office tried to filrt with me after I being nice and help her out most of the time, it's just that I don't have a clue that she was flirting And at one point she started a rumour saying that I'm gay because she somehow think I don't find her attractive=rejection=IM GAY LMFAO
@@dafuqgusdafrey60about 50% of the guys girls have told me are gay have been in this situation They told me those guys were gay because i was also in that situation 😂
That "I was just venting" is so spot on 😂. Multiple females after explaining to me what happened, have said exactly that when I point out they may have been in the wrong. Its almost like they are confirming "good point"
Woman here. If a female colleague asked me the same thing, I'd give the same response and fucking tell them about cookies, cache, etc and show them how to do it themselves next time because if it's only affecting them, it's a them problem, not a company problem and they can fix it themselves quickly and easily next time
_"Teach a man to fish..."_ _"Teach a MAN"_ _"a MAN"_ *Women generally don't fish, they expect to have it fished FOR them and served on a golden platter.*
IF THEY HAVE TO ASK SUCH AN ALL-ENCOMPASSING QUESTION IN THE FIRST PLACE ... Then they really do need it explained as if they are children, because that's almost certainly the level they are going to understand it on. If the question is more to the point and nuanced, then they can probably understand the "works in the industry" version. And the "THEY" isn't necessarily always a woman. It can be your new, and completely useless boss, who has no clue what any of you actually do, and is only there because somebody is playing hide the sausage with someone they probably shouldn't be.
Yup, i work with a lot of specialists in various legal and scientific fields. I now lead qoth 'explain like i'm five' when we go into the weeds of some minutae of their expertise - makes sure i fully understand whatever the thing is and avoids a response full of jargon.
By definition, it's only mansplaining if he's telling you something you already know in a manner that could be seen as condescending. She didn't know the answer to her question, ergo, not mansplaining.
@@justkev1044 Yes. Also, the assumption is that the man is explaining it to you on the assumption that a woman probably isnt as knowledgeable on the topic as he (a man) is. So its "A man explaining something she already knows to a woman in a condescending way, on the assumption that someone of her sex wont be knowledgeable on the topic." THAT would be mansplaining. And arguably, that actually is kinda offensive. But it also very very rarely ever happens, and is almost impossible to proof (Because telling what the motivation for explaining something was is very difficult. Was it bias, or was it the fact that he could see her - for example - make mistakes, mistaktes which someone knowledgeable on the topic wouldnt have made, and therefore decided to step in?)
As a man entering his 60's this culture is actually terrifying. I'm dealing with medical issues that might disable me. I shutter to think my care might be handled by these critical women. I'm not sure I want to stick around for that.
Unfortunately the alternative is not much better- in my experience most doctors these days are coming to America 🇺🇸 from an extremely patriarchal foreign background. As in, you don’t want your female relative to have to be alone in a room with that guy, no matter how many paper credentials he has on the wall.
(they can react wildly to this, so batten down the hatches first, and be _very_ mindful if it gets seemingly no reaction at all, because _that_ one is thinking of ways to get back at you.)
I recall once when a women was being very helpful explaining the rules to a game when suddenly she stopped and apologized for womenplaining. A women was made to feel guilty and apologize for being kind and helpful. My hatred of feminism grew by 10 times that day.
Oh my God, she is talking about me 😂 For all the women out there who consider this annoying - NERDS DO THIS ALL THE TIME not because they want to annoy you, but because they want to educate you a little bit about a very common problem that everyone encounters in their daily lives.
It's true, you can blame of person for being a little socially dense sometimes when their intentions are pure. I am very guilty of this. Of course, I love when people explain things to me. If they don't I will badger them with questions and be annoying that way.
Except that there seem to be more women who say "I stopped listening when you used a three syllable word." Sorry, this is unfair to women. Probably the group is "Misandrist".
The men that do this are stupid and ignorant, which is why they do it. Men that actually care about learning and improving themselves will actively hear an explanation and learn from it. When I was in school, many years ago, there were a lot of people like that. They're were ignorant and the only knowledge they had was what happened on the game the day before, they weren't willing to learn anything new
This is why I always say "I don't know" or "I'm not sure" rather than telling them what could be wrong. You just can't solve people's problems anymore. Let them figure it out on their own.
Funny, y’all never seem to do it with other guys. Only women and girls when you *think* you know more than we do (and guess what, you’re not always right).
@@StarWarsomania We do it all the time, often you don't notice because other guys don't often react with hostility when a man wants to share information and teach someone else.
@@StarWarsomania In many cases, that is actually positive bias, believe it or not. When a man clearly fucks up (because he lacks the knowledge to do it right), and other men see it, we often just think: "Damn, that guy is an idiot Oo". But when we see women fuck up the same way, we think "Oh, she must lack that (previously mentioned) knowledge to succeed in this task, maybe i can help her by providing it" So its not that we dont assume lack of knowledge on men, its that we are way more ok with men paying for their own lack of skill/knowledge than we are with women paying for theirs. Because, believe it or not, most men LIKE women, and dont like to see them fail.
i, an electrical engineering student.... was working in a call center. And the men tried to explain to me how to fucking start a PC and open a browser. They didnt explain it to ANY of the other MEN that were STARTING ANEW with me. They ONLY talked to me like i had never seen a technical device in my life.
They're actually treating you like a competent adult capable of learning, rather than a child you have to do everything for.
Most women are like children. Zero accountability. Even their feelings of insecurity when you explain something to them is your fault.
Exactly, people who say "don't mansplain" are children who can't cooperate with others.
Well put.
That was their big mistake. As was allowing them into workplaces
@@sbwlearning1372 hot take that everyone is afraid of liking but they know this is an issue. Lol. Certain fields, they are good in. Many others, they are nothing but a problem.
There are some really smart, logical women out there, though, and they belong in the work place.
The irony of “don’t treat me like a child”, then DEMANDING a simple, child-like answer because she can’t handle complex things like an adult
But he didn't give her the answer in this hypothetical example. He just gave her the web browsing 101 lecture for no good reason.
@@chingizzhylkybayev8575 Actually he did give her an answer, it's just not the answer she wanted and he helped her fix the problem.
First of all she assumed that the website wasn't working instead of understanding that her computer had caused a log jam. He showed her how to clear that log jam, explaining why it happened.
Her problem is that she assumed that she had framed a simple question. What she really did was just make a wrong assumption.
The simple question would have been, can you access the website because I can't. and his answer would probably been yes.
@@chingizzhylkybayev8575having worked in IT for a number of years, you have no idea how computer illiterate most people are....
Having to explain a keyboard has to be plugged in, in order for it to work, that unplugging a PC to use the hoover whilst working at home will shut your PC down.....or that no, your mouse is not likely to work after you put it in the dishwasher because it was sticky, is not an IT fault.....
Yeah.....
Over time, you do stop treating people a little like they have a clue, as you come across soooooo many who don't....each and every single day.....
In this instance he just explained why the issue had occurred, if she was IT savvy, she'd have known this herself, anyone who knows anything about computers understands you occasionally need to clear caches and things, she didn't, and as such he could have just fixed it, only to find himself back there doing it again a few months down the line...
So annoyed as she might feel at this, at least she learnt something, and chances are, bet your last penny, a colleague will have this same.issue, and she will use that knowledge to fix the problem, and show how "IT savvy" she is to her colleagues lol 😂
100%
This skit does not provide an example of the mansplaining thing.
It is the getting a child like answer that is the main part of the mansplain concept annoyance.
As a web developer "why is the website not working?" is not a simple question.
As a non-web developer. I agree. I have no idea what is happening, but if I light these scented candles, make sure my view of the moon is precisely offset at 3*, the website will work for 5 seconds before I must reset preperations.
That or it finally loaded and I hit refresh at the wrong time.
Most of the time problem is between keyboard and chair.
@@busterval The sheriff's office would sometimes refer to drunks as a short circuit between the steering wheel and gas pedal.
Have you tried turning it off and on?
Ngl it could be so much, maybe even at the same time, that I would just go with "I have no fucking idea lol"
As a philosopher... "why [anything]" is never a simple question.
Philosophy majors CANNOT start a sentence without stating, "As a philosopher..." Try it. I bet you can't.
Philosophers aren't expected to answer simple questions. If the question is simple, you can take a smoke break.
This should be obvious to anyone over the age of 8. If you don't want an explanation don't ask why lol
Yes, this! XD
Okay. Then how about this question: Why are you a philosopher?
I got an HR complaint from a female intern that I “mansplained” something to her. It was how to run a basic report so that she could submit it to my VP’s. I explained it to her 3 times and the 4th time i made a pre recorded video and shared it with her. She said that i “mansplained” it to her in the video. I shared it with HR and they had a good laugh out of it.
how long did she last on that role?
@@subratadhar7698 not very long
You should've filed a harrassment complaint with HR.
@@jpmarc2005 she didnt last that long in the company 😂
And how would HR have treated it if you didn’t have video evidence? 😂
"He talks to me like I'm a child"
Proceeds to act like a child
*pouts* *crosses arms* *rolls eyes*
But women are like children. Ask one to take responsibility for their actions.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Worst than a child*
100%
There is no word I hate more than “mansplaining”. It was supposed to be when a man who knew less than a woman explained things she already knew (like a regular guy explaining surgery to a surgeon). Now, it’s any time a man tries to explain or teach a woman anything.
A woman said I was mansplaining something to her once. I asked her what she did and she said marketing or something, and I responded with “ok, so if I was telling you about marketing, then that would be mansplaining. But since I’m talking about psychology, the field I studied for over a decade, hold three degrees in, and am a professor of, I’m not mansplaining, I’m teaching, and if you aren’t smart enough to understand the difference, I feel sorry for you.”
There is nothing more satisfying than putting someone in their place.
The best part is that you could probably understand why she was acting like a bitch and make fun of her for it😂
So you mansplained mansplaining to her? 😂:p
@@BobTheTrueCactus well technically no, because she obviously didn't know what it meant
@@oshawott4544 no sh*t.
Although the original term is already set up to be understood the way she did.
@@BobTheTrueCactus I'm sorry if that came off wrong
I'm just autistic
"I don't care if it happens again. I am just trying to get my work done."
That one physically hurt.
"AND I TOOK THAT PERSONALLY"
pick one lady, they're mutually exclusive
…it’s somewhat understandable but at the same time… like tf? We are trying to teach you how to resolve the issue in case it happens again and that you can gain more independence instead of wasting time trying to figure it out on your own
@akiriathorsteinson7611 yea, especially if it's a simple problem. If I notice a solution to a problem we have e had at work and it's easy to fix, I'll try to teach others how to fix it when it occurs do that people learn over time...I don't see any problem with that. If it's simple enough to fix thst I can show anyone then it's not to hard to get yourself.
@@akiriathorsteinson7611 trying to get her work done even if it means someone else doing it for her.... as a matter of course, that is
I'm a man who works in IT Support. I generally try to educate the users about their issue instead of just fixing the problem, because next time they'll be able to fix it themselves which will be much quicker. If they can fix it themselves in a few minutes they'll be less downtime for them then if they have to wait for us because we may have a backlog and be busy. I'm trying to decrease downtime for them.
Also work IT 100% agree.
A small explanation usually saves you hours of calls in the future because now the clients you support are more knowledgeable about technology.
Ah but they want that downtime. You are taking away their getting paid to wait on IT time.
@@Rievvenexactly. And there are a lot of people who are simply too lazy to do anything for themselves anyhow and do not want to be educated.
@@Rievven Those people are usually slacking across the board and are quickly looking for new jobs and make up a tiny percentage of people I actually encounter in my city.
Also it’s generally just bad idea to waste the time or piss off the IT department. lol
I also do this, been doing it since I started work but 99% of the time, I'll still get a call going "it doesn't work"
"They're not speaking to you like a child. You're acting like one."
“Didn’t mean to Man-splain how you’re wrong”!!! Gold.
The man was talking to her like a knowledgeable adult. But she is just a bored child.
Exactly. She only took offense because he wasn't an idiot.
She just want him to listen to her bish and say go girl smh
Yeah I would never speak to a kid about cookies and bugs and cache, unless that kid is genuinely interested in IT
I’m glad people are finally understanding that “modern” women are overgrown children, something I’ve seen for over a decade now.
@@cookiedoodle0276those things has little to do with IT
women: "treat us the same as men"
men: *treats woman like a man*
women: **offended**
You should almost never believe what woman says she wants, she usually doesn't even know it consciously and says the thing that creates cohesion in the group.
@@lepathewarrior4445 You're using "cohesion" wrong.
Women ☕️
As a man, if I ask someone a question like this, I never get some longwinded tirade because other guys don't feel the need to impress me. I'm genuinely sorry for the people in your life if you respond to every question by dumping the contents of your brain onto them.
@@theeclectic2919unless they edited their comment, I think you are incorrect
He should have just woman-splained and said, "It's all your fault." Simple and to the point.
Pardon me but I disagree, a woman-splaining would be "If you cared enough you'd know!"
@@darknessLordCCor you don't think I'm pretty anymore.
"Why isn't my website working?"
"It's fine."
Hilarious!!
This should not be as funny as it is...
"How much detail do you want?" Is a good question to ask before explaining something.
Yep, I have a habit of providing detail.
Now I just say “google it”.
Seriously?
If you don't like my answers don't ask me anymore. Solved
I always start out with "do you want the short answer or long answer?"
Sometimes people are surprised i give them the long answer they asked for....damned if you do damned if you dont.
Yes but you have to make sure they consent listening to your question beforehand. and also they have to consent you asking for consent. And again, the consent for asking for consent. And again and again and .. you know just ignore them.
Consent is everything, right?
Ladies, you can't be mansplained to without _our_ consent to see you as teachable.
Want us to give up?
_Revoke the consent._
Isn't that so, @@monsieurkeyboard?
He wasn’t speaking to her as he would a child, but assumed she was an adult. Clearly he was wrong, she is a child.
I agree. Next time he should tell her: "website broken, very bad, we fix, please sit down and have a piece of candy"
and then they wonder why a woman or other culture does not get hired. HR complaints and lawsuits avoided.
@@StarBellySneetchActually the company I work for does hire more women even without the right qualifications because they want to meet a diversity quota over qualified candidates.
@@jamespruitt6718 Ah, so you too know the pain of doing the work of three people, and getting a worse evaluation than the people whose slack you take up.
@@danmac6185yea that type of work environment is disgusting and there's no excuse as to why jobs are forced to hire unqualified ppl regardless of their gender just to fit certain quotas... I'm surprised they are able to keep anyone with legitimate skill if they are having to pick up that much slack .
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."--Eleanor Roosevelt
She seemingly has a lot of consent.
“Oh no! He gave me an answer to the question I asked! What ever shall I do!” 🙄
Apparently get butthurt, complain to others, and try to make them look like the bad guy.
I'm gonna need full stories now, not one sided nonsense
I was an oil man for 20 years and I would get this exact attitude from women homeowners asking me why their furnace isn't working and what am I going to do to fix it.
They would angrily demand these answers and as I would start to explain I would get cut off "I don't care about that! What are you going to do to fix it and make sure it doesn't happen again?" I would start answering that question and again be cut off demanding I explained why it happened in the first place.
One woman did this to me so bad I eventually cut her off and told her that she should be happy that I am there because I am the person who found the problem that was caused by another company and I am now going to fix it so that her house will stay cozy warm and that she should be making a batch of those pancakes I could smell to thank me for saving her household from being cold. That's when her husband decided to speak up and shooed her away so that I could get to work on the furnace.
I kinda get it, as a dev when I get asked about something I just give a very broad answer and try to stay away from specifics, until I know people are actually interested in the answer
Um--- and they vote?
That is the reason why you should talk to the guy
She teased you with the aroma of pancakes!?! That alone is a crime.
That's what the authorities call giving the "Dry Jemima".
Women don’t know the difference between a right and a privilege. The fact that he own husband had to shoo her away into the kitchen proves Feminism is a plague
"Why isn't this website working?"
"It's probably user error, you're welcome."
PEBKAC
Erm no! Most errors aren't user errors, only a small portion I would log down as user error. 😅
@@carlospinto5845 I think their comments is meant to show how the conversation would've went if the girl dressed in white's coworker had given her the "simple" answer (the short answer). It is meant to show that the "simple" answer wouldn't have helped, while educating her on the problem would've not only helped her this time, but in all the future times where this might occur
That “i just wanted to vent” was real asf. I hate that shit. Basically trynna say “i didn’t want your feedback that doesn’t affirm my feelings” 😂
I honestly prefer journaling to venting. Journals don’t: blabber unless looked in, get angry, get burnt out, forget, or do anything other than be a writing surface.
@@techhelpportal7778 journals don't judge, they just let me judge myself
“I just wanted to vent.” … Then word it differently because it sounds like you only said that because you got caught in your own argument when you realized the other party had a point.
Nah but sometimes you just want to vent. Doesn’t apply when you’re completely wrong but sometimes the other person actually agrees with you and wants to help you find solutions. Which is nice of them but sometimes I have already thought about solutions and just want to let out my anger before moving on and putting them into action.
99.999% of the time if a women goes to you with a problem or a complaint she is not looking to fix anything. At best she is looking to vent and normally she is just looking to have her thoughts and emotions validated and nothing else.
This is the innate fatherly instinct of Men ........ they'll teach you how to solve your problems !
Patriarchy!
Wow. That's the first time i've never heard it called the fatherly instinct before but, you might be right. I train hospital users how to use their timekeeping and scheduling system and follow the teach a man to fish philosophy. I'll never do things for them but, I have no problem walking them through how to fix their own problems every time.
For the most part they like it but, there's always some who expect you to do it for them.
Also women: “Men won’t mentor us anymore!” Um, yeah. Between this shit and the potential HR nightmare because she decided that “good morning” was over the line, men don’t want to be anywhere near the dice you’re asking them to roll.
One thing to keep in mind is that if a guy is explaining the stuff already known, he _might_ just be rolling through his mental flowchart to reach the part that is causing trouble. Maybe let the dude cook a bit.
yeah exactly, if i have a problem i start at the end i want working and work backwards at possible fail points to see what may or may not be working, and sometimes i have to say it out loud so i remember i did it
@@Guardian582Yeah, you have to have the conversation with yourself. Hard to explain that, but I'm pretty sure every guy understands that.
@@mycroft16pretty much thinking to yourself out loud. I'm guilty of that way too much. I think I'm crazy and that's one of the many signs.
Best strategy - avoid women.
Yes, they need your help.
Don't give it to them.
Let them be "strong and independent" - and figure it out themselves.
@@kurtamesbury6679Permit me to ask the classically appropriate question: who hurt you? 😆😆😆😆😆
I'm being sarcastic.
"i was just venting"
The fucking shudder of rage that shook my spine...
When you try to help a problem but then they refuse the advice and your inquire why and then they just throw that line in your face like a cloud of sand to the eyes and run off
If you want to just bitch for 15 minutes about life, please, for the love of god, preface the conversation with that.
I got a very strong urge to headbutt something when I heard that. I stopped listening to that part of my brain decades ago, but it still makes itself known sometimes.
I think it was "The Dadvocate" who said, women don't want an answer, they just want to be listened to while they complain. Don't offer an answer, just agree that it sucks.
@@robby1816
True
but when you do that,
Sometimes they then curve ball and you and berate you for NOT offering a solution,
(Will say though, I love the Dadvocate, and it has helped me alot with communication with my partner, but damn some people just, suck.)
She's incredibly rude, asks for help and then trash talks about him. Ungrateful *****
"I dont want to be mansplained to"
So, why did you ask a MAN to explain something to you? 😅
For the sole purpose of adding to modern feminism
so she could throw accusations like mansplaining around. Got to keep up with the circle-arguments man, illogical-think all day, every day :D
Cause women don't have the answers
I was a superuser at my previous job. If anyone accused me of mansplaining when I was explaining basics so she didn't repeat the same dumb shit & need help again, I'd reply with "You're a strong independent woman, you don't need my help. I'm going back to my work."
@@Aeternus_Noxso you're proving that you're condescending here. If one person calls you an a-hole, they're probably the a-hole. If everyone is doing it, it's probably you
I get this all the time when my wife asks what's wrong with her truck. And I try to give her the long answer and I get the I don't care as long as it gets fixed.
because all women ever want to do is bitch, not problem solve or understand anything.
She sounds like she means “fix my car”
Which means shes a poor communicator. @@soeralecha
So a guy teaching you something you didn't know is a bad thing? How dare he assume you were interested in knowledge, intelligent enough to understand, and bothering to take the time to explain it to you.
Ikr? How dare he assume she's a strong independent woman willing to know how to fix the problem herself next time! How can she be a damsel in distress after that?
Totally makes sense.
So lesson learned, don't teach women anything. Just one word answers. Unless it's YOUR woman then open up just a little bit, and be emotional? With her? Idk man.
exactly, why ask in the first place lmao 🙄🤡
This is why you should default to treating women like children
WAY before "mansplaining" became a term, I always said: "If you do not want the answer do not ask me the question."
That’s not what mansplaining is. Mansplaining is when a man explains something we didn’t ask him to. Like I’m deciding between two dvd players and a random guy comes up to tell me which one is better and why.
whats wrong with learning?
@jaybee4288 maybe spend more time woman listening instead of complaining about problems that don't exist
@@jaybee4288yeah I despise it when people talk and share their opinions
@@jaybee4288 Womansplaining: Condescending explanation of something by a woman, particularly to a man.
Mansplaining: Condescending explanation of something by a man, particularly to a woman.
It’s not just simply a man explaining something you didn’t ask him to. You could have asked him.
Ex military here... if a squad member or officer asks a question, I give as full a sit-rep (situation report) as I can, in as few words as I can, so they are FULLY INFORMED and can therefore make BETTER DECISIONS QUICKLY.
You don't like mansplaining? ... THEN STAY IGNORANT!
So if an officer asks you why the showers aren't clean, you give a 30-minute explanation fo all the various reasons that COULD have led to the showers not being clean?
I seriously doubt that...
@@hannahk.598 them the shower cold be fixed faster in all next times that the problem appiers again.
@@hannahk.598why the showers aren’t working and why is this website not working are not simple questions there’s a massive variety of reasons why either could be broken
@@hannahk.598 I guess you missed where he said, "as few words as I can"
I am so offended that you mansplained that "sit-rep" means "situation report". I mean, sure, I didn't know, and now I've learned something, but I'm still offended, right?
(In case it's not obvious I'm being ironic.)
I just say “dunno, it’s your computer, what have you done?”
A significant number of women are upset that men avoid them at work now. No more mentoring.
Good. They brought it upon themself. They deserve it. It's time for them to start learning equal consequences and equal accountability.
*sigh* 😮💨
a part of me wants to help when asked because it’s the right thing to do
also a part of me thinks they’re social hacking to take advantage of kindness to have someone else do their job for them 🧐
Yes/No answers as much as possible, and avoiding women coworkers especially if you are a man regardless of your sexual orientation
Mentor a female co-worker? Why? They generally don't appreciate it. Seldom are they are they truely grateful. BTDT. And you run the risk of getting charged with sexual harassment. It is not worth it.
It’s crazy that there are so many men in our offices anyway. Y’all need to get back out into the world and build roads and fight wars and stuff. We need to bring back national service, men really struggle without it. Office jobs are for women.
Exactly, they want to give you everything you need to solve it yourself next time because guys are driven to be competent and assume others want to be competent too and not have to rely on others
isnt that good tho? you learn to solve problems yourself. why would you wanna ask and get answered many times and end up still not understanding it?
@@justkev1044 because people are fucking stupid and arrogant and think that just because its someones job means they want to do it like they themselves aren't stuck in a dead-end job that pays minimum wage and treats them like shit
@@justkev1044I suppose some people just don’t want to learn.
Yeah, because asking for help when you could literally just do it yourself is called "laziness" and "indecency".
@@lastguardianofthedyinglight no. Asking for help is when you can’t figure out how to do it yourself. If you can do it yourself and you are allowed to, you do it yourself, that’s called being independent.
If you ask someone to do it for you because you don’t want to do it, unless you literally lack time to do it, that’s not asking for help. That is being lazy. Sorry to break it to you.
It must be far from indecent though, seeing how so many people do it without a care.
Women NEED to stop femsplaining!
Not FemSplaining .. FemPlaining
Both should stop explaining themselves. If they are normal, it will happen naturally.
@@joebloggs430Womplaining?
Isn't that emotional talk? My mansense (like spideysense) just tingled.
It’s actually womansplaing (yeah, I didn’t know there was a word for it either at first, isn’t Google great? 😂)
You mean to say guys possess the communication skills to ensure you fully understand something you ask about? Shocker
Women complain that we don’t communicate but when we do, it’s “mansplaining” lol
@@cheekfinesser liberal women
@@cheekfinesserand somehow THEY are always good at communicating.
I pointed to my wife that she transmits, not communicates. She does not consider the concept of interference and reciever.
In other words, a woman designed communication tower would transmit at a unique out of band frequency that is susceptable to most normal enviromental conditions that no reciever built can intercept and it will still be the man's fault.
@@cheekfinesserno "women " don't, insecure/emotionally immature girls do in a woman's body.
@@anvil3589basically yes, they only want one way "talking" that align with them
If you disagree even slightly, they will somehow shift to "you not listening to me"
But definitely depend on that person persona, my wife is a whole different species than girls I dated before
My wife will ask me about why the car makes a funny sound and I give her a college-level essay on internal combustion 😂😂😂
This should go viral. My sister took her car to the mechanics because of “noises”. He tested it, explaining what was wrong and she just replied “fix it, don’t mansplain it to me.”
As a man with a wife and daughter who aren’t handy at all. I try to explain to them how to do everything they ask me to do. They say we have you for that. So I tell them you won’t always.
You can say that again.
Sounds like some spoilt brats you've got there pal. You should go on a holiday for a couple of weeks and leave them with a few problems to fix
@@thenoodlebuddy I have, all that happens is they do the bare minimum until I get back. I tell them them they are going to end up like Grey Gardens.
If he only fixed the problem and not talk to her, then she would have whinge why he is such an awkward creep. You just can’t win with these women.
This is every single female I have worked with in the machine shop for the last 8 years. I have been there for 19 years now, and the first 8, they actually listened and executed what I have said. In the last 8 years, it is like pulling teeth to get them to listen. Then they keep asking the same question and wonder why I get upset or get an attitude and then tell management I am "hard to work with" None of the women have lasted more than 3 years in this shop.
bruh, my sis works as team leader at huge corpo. She was once accused of mansplaining by her subordinate that had no clue what to do in her job. Sister told me that with every business specific word she used the girl was opening her mouth wider and wider :D
@Sajgoniarz Whats your sister's logic? A subordinate has no know how, yet your sister explains with more and more "business words" she doesn't understand? Your sister is the one at fault for lacking communication skills. People like the subordinate are people you need to account for and find other ways of getting the point across by understanding what they expect.
Every single one for 8 years. Yeah, hate to break it to you but not everyone working your job would have that issue, it lies on your communication skills with impatient, low-attention individuals - it is a reflection on you, not them. What does getting upset accomplish when you give the same answer to their repetitive questions instead of approaching it differently? Humans in general are entitled beings who blame others when they are not behaving the way they expect, we all have to deal with that.
@@kevinzhang6623 it was not a position for some greenhorn. My sister were looking for assistant ASAP and requirements were pretty high including diploma and some certification. She had to break down every definition for the new girl, while it was impossible to get certification without knowing them. Tools, flows etc. was also an industry standard. My sister could not believe how she could slip through interview.
And in terms of communication... there is a reason why some "taskforces" are bring together based on communication types of individuals, since sometimes you can't afford miscommunication, or time required for putting everybody on the same page.
That coincides with the history of the proliferation and increase in social media use. Sad stuff.
Mansplaining is the act of telling something they already know despite them knowing.
I’m an industrial electrician who does side work occasionally. I’m used to speaking to men. A coworker of my wife asked if I could look at their remodel service so I went there and saw they had used one neutral through the whole shebang. I told her she can’t do that, she she asked why. I started to explain when she cuts me off to say it doesn’t matter, it’ll work, won’t it? Sure have it.
The reason you don’t share neutrals is because of harmonics from computer processors. She didn’t listen, and overloaded the neutral which fried her smart TV and other devices. She was complaining to my wife that I didn’t tell her why she shouldn’t do that.
Just say "it can hurt stuff"
Any more technical than that and they won't listen unless they're in the industry themselves (at which point, they listen better than men 😂)
@@angrydragonslayer looks like we need to speak to them not like a child but like an ork.
@@Nomo-sapiensor Frankensteins monster. "Fire Bad!"
@@Nomo-sapiens I've had to do this with managers and bosses at work. I'm a software engineer with IT knowledge and sometimes they hire managers who have ZERO knowledge at all. And yeah, you have to explain it like they're an orc. Even children grasp things better than some of the people I've had to work under. Thankfully, they usually don't grasp sarcasm very well either.
This is what a man hears, "I don't want to learn how to solve MY problems I want YOU to come and solve the exact same problem every time" so strong, so independent...
To be fair, is it HER problem? We don't have any background, don't know if she needs to use that website often or just very rarely to get some information. And generally: If a website is actually down, it's most likely not a problem with cookies. And if that website is down often, it's a company problem and not her job to play tech support every week
I personally like to search for solutions first before I call tech support and I do ask if they want to teach me how to solve it if I know that this problem likely occurs again in the future.
But I would be annoyed too if the tech support person goes in a 30 minute monologue about all the things that COULD be the problem if it's not even clear that I have to ever deal with that problem again.
I don't need a 30 minute training session for a problem that might never occure again, I have my own job that doesn't include tech support training time slots. That's like me going to the hiring manager to give him a whole lecture about how social security works when he simply asked about a minor error in his salary slip.
Womansplaining is much worse than mansplaining, it's torture waiting for them to get to the point (a very long time)
My mom is a verbal processor.
Recently, I've taken to dragging her to _my_ point first, leaving absolutely no uncertainty in my wake, and then apologizing and smoothing things over after the fact. Repeating as necessary only until I've finally dug out all my old poisoned wells.
Already a solid 80% of the way done now, I think. 🙂
And then they accuse you of interrupting them after you've just let them drone on pointlessly for three minutes.
@@censorthispuertorican only worse when they do it to you, right?
@@E4439Qv5 😁 so much of their complaints are pure projection.
It’s an oxymoron
These are typical responses from IT. They need to know what buttons you pushed, what signals you got, what sites you were on.
I've been mansplained to, and it does stink. I'm a muralist, and was working with a friend to just repaint a room. Nothing fancy, but he sat there telling me how to care for his brushes, how to wipe the paint, use as little as possible, and how to cut into corners. I was done. He knows my skills, but he was acting like I was a child. I reminded him I'm a professional artist, I've prepped, primed and painted rooms before doing a mural. I painted all the walls in my house, and I know what I'm doing. He hired me because he knew my skills were good, but this micromanaging was too much. I left him, walked off the job, and haven't spoken to him since.
That isn't mansplaining to a woman. That is the way men communicate to all people. You said he already knew you were competent. He was reviewing the facts to make sure there was no misunderstanding between the both of you. If that bothered you then fine, it's your choice to leave. He didn't have to hire you and probably regretted his choice. My personal guess is he will never hire a woman again.
Give a man a fish, feed him for a day.
Teach a man to fish, feed him for a lifetime.
Women don't want to learn how to fish and to feed themselves. They want just the fish for free and someone feeds them the whole life if they demand it.
Teach a man to fish and he'll go out every night with a six pack and stay on the lake for hours:)
Saves me making the comment about giving a fish v teaching to fish.
Teach a woman to fish, she'll say she doesn't need you
Teach a woman to fish, and she'll accuse you of mansplaining.
Thank you. The most frustrating part of the term "mansplaining" is that even if we try to explain ourselves, we can be accused of it. It's a trap.
No, the most frustrating part is that they used a gendered term to name a behaviour all genders do. I've been "mansplained" by female friends over house chores despite living alone for years.
PS. The worst "mansplaining" is women telling men what a "real man" should do.
I always make sure and read people's minds before I tell them anything, that way I don't tell them anything they already know.
“Asking men to change is like asking women to stop being emotional” Excellent statement 👍
"no! i'm not emotional!" a woman reject your argument with high pitch voice... (but contradictive)
Everytime someone tells me to stop mansplaining I just tell them to stop womenyapping and holy shit they explode.
Loved the "Didn't mean to mansplain how you're wrong" at the end 😂👍
Just don’t help women that’s what I learn.
Why bother? They don’t even appreciate it.
Not all women are like that. Not all men are assholes, either. There’s variations of everything on planet Earth.
@Dapryor As a woman: Thank you! I prefer to have the issue broken down for me so I can fix it later if it happens again. That way, I save time and money.
@@alexisblack8921 I hate it when someone acts like anything in life is all or nothing. Not all cops are bad, not all dogs bite. And not all men are assholes just as not all women are gold diggers. It’s unintelligent to paint the world as black and white.
@@alexisblack8921BASED!
@@alexisblack8921 That kind of woman or really that kind of person I do like to help.
I am a lead senior network engineer.
So I get people asking for my help often.
Most of the time it’s something they can fix on their own & is not my responsibility.
So I don’t mind telling them what to do.
It’s only women that demand I fix it my self. Which isn’t my job & I don’t care.
They want to learn how to fix it then self I will tell them. They demand I fix it go out in a ticket with the help desk. I have a whole company I am in charge of not your browser issue.
when she asked "how to do this?", she meant "do this for me." They want to be bailed out.
Annoyance in response to another individual after they tell you stuff you had no idea about, is a symptom of pride. It hurts when somebody you thought beneath you starts teaching you.
Damn. Not always but this is def a thing
I really appreciate how you explain the differences between men and women and not bringing men down just because they're misunderstood.
If they talk to you like a child; chances are, you act like one.
Chances are people who first begin to act like one are because they were mature people who are treated as such by egotistical individuals.
@@kevinzhang6623 Yes. Truly mature, to regress to the level of a child, because of 1 incident/exchange, with 1 individual. Especially, when they probably treat most everyone like a child, or something about the ”mature” individual’s behaviour etc.
warrants treating them like a child. 😅
@@kevinzhang6623 Right, because letting go of your better graces, because somebody mildly upset you.
is the highest mark of maturity.
@@Monntauk Indeed 👍🏻.
Chances are they’re indoctrinated to look down on people who have the beliefs that they believe you to have.
As a middle-aged guy, I can 💯 relate. I have a tendency to explain how a clock works when all my gf wanted to know was what time it was
Fortunately, she's good-natured about it.
Love your work!
I learnt the hard way that most of the time women aren't actually looking for a solution, but just for emotional support for their problem.
So guys: if your coworker doesn't ACTUALLY ASK FOR HELP, DON'T OFFER IT. Otherwise the problem will be your fault faster than you can say "because".
That's not a bad way to tie what women mostly want into the male way of thinking. We prize clear communication. So don't offer anything they don't clearly ask for. Win/win.
@@randomobserver8168 Totally. But it's not a contest. I see it more as adapting to the female way of thinking: not solution-based, but personality-based.
It's hard for many people (not just men) to understand, but if a woman struggles with a problem and you jump to the solution at once, she feels ignored and thinks the "technology" is more interesting than she is.
Don't. Console her, repeat the problem statement (= show you were listening), agree to her that this is crap / shit / bad design / hard to understand, whatever it is.
But DO NOT suggest solutions unless she explicitly asks for help.
She may see it as if you didn't think she could solve it by herself. Venting anger is not asking for help.
@@randomobserver8168that's exactly what he said in the original comment
@@96vipul Nah, it's not "exactly" what he said. It's a comment on what he said, followed by a supporting restatement of what he said. That serves a purpose even if not for you.
But that doesn’t represent this example.
Ok, maybe the direct one where lady A is talking to lady B. In that case, yes, lady A doesn’t want the explanation. But in the scenario lady A was talking about, what? She just wanted the guy to agree with her it was a terrible thing and affirm her feelings? I this case, the thing was affecting her work and she needed it to stop, and like the guy implied, unless she knew why and how, it would happen again.
"Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you'll feed him for a lifetime"
Omega 3s op
Deport an illegal, and you'll never have to feed him again 🙃
@@LiloAnStitch Yeah, but... You are aware that "ohana" means family, right? 🙃
@@LiloAnStitch It's a reference to your username, a joke, a funny
Give a woman a fish and she will complained that it's not a premade meal.
Teach her how to fish and you have 7 missed called from HR and a warrant for sexual assault somehow
They'd get a rhetorical question: "why should I explain that? You gonna fix it?".
Next time just send her to the university of google. Let them mansplain it.
I have tried
Both times, the issue was their wifi being off
This is an excellent insight by a woman. And she is spot on for guys like me. My wife has accused of answering her “in a looooong round-about way”…I’m just trying my best to communicate…And giving the big picture WITH DETAILS matters.
Are our wives related? LOL
God forbid you cut them off or ask a question, mid explanation though, right?
Absolutely true! However when my hubby dies he got a big enough insurance I can just hire an expert to get it fixed the next day instead of waiting 2 years for a 30 min job that he insisted on doing himself because it saves money. Meanwhile I have to conect and disconnect my car battery every time I drive because the battery keeps draining.
Meanwhile I could explain till kingdom come how.to.sew a button or hem pants and he looks at me like I'm speaking mandarin.
Believe me I love my hubby of 40 yrs and I'm happy to divide work according to our preferences and expertise but the procrastination is probably going to kill me. Anyway , If I die first I won't have to cook clean mend raising kids while tend grandkids etc. and he can hire the dozen people to replace me.
I asked for a door for my living room to keep our kids cats. I asked if it was OK and got the nod. I wanted a slidding barn style ddor. 10 years later and multiple carpet accidents I'm waiting. No, I can't get rid of the cats. It would break my kids heart.
@@melaneephillips8721 you want to know the trick for that? Just start doing it yourself. Buy some wood and a track, and whatever parts you need, and start trying to build one yourself. As soon as he sees what you’re doing, his instincts will kick in, and he’ll criticize the job you’re doing, and then he’ll take it over himself. We men are all procrastinators, with a million excuses, and sometimes we need a guilt trip or a kick in the ass to get going. It’s like reverse psychology. My dad is the same way. When my mom has been waiting forever for something to get done, she calls me, I come over and start doing the job, he ends up feeling guilty about it, and finishes it himself, or helps me finish it. Works every single time, without fail. And if it’s something simple, like putting up a shelf, my mom will do it herself, incorrectly of course, and he’ll say “no, no, what are you doing? You didn’t even drill into a stud! Just give me the drill, I’ll do it.” Lol. You’re welcome. Enjoy your new barn door!
And ....we men are not stupid ladies. We learn from our experiences. The next time you ask that man for help , don't be surprised if he says, " I'm kinda busy right now, go ask Sue."
If she complains to him directly at all. She may just shut up and complain about him behind his back.
@BobTheTrueCactus oh they do, one girl in my office tried to filrt with me after I being nice and help her out most of the time, it's just that I don't have a clue that she was flirting
And at one point she started a rumour saying that I'm gay because she somehow think I don't find her attractive=rejection=IM GAY
LMFAO
@@dafuqgusdafrey60about 50% of the guys girls have told me are gay have been in this situation
They told me those guys were gay because i was also in that situation 😂
He’s speaking to her like she is a grown up. Rookie.
That "I was just venting" is so spot on 😂. Multiple females after explaining to me what happened, have said exactly that when I point out they may have been in the wrong. Its almost like they are confirming "good point"
*vents torwards a man*
*man tries to either fix it or gives his honest opinion*
"i was just venting"
"THEN FUCKING SAY THAT!"
I feel so heard. Not even joking, thank you. Such a simple video gives me such hope that people can understand one another if they try.
jesus I'm an IT director and I needed to hear this
Don't want to be spoken to like a child? Be accountable. Simple as that.
Woman here. If a female colleague asked me the same thing, I'd give the same response and fucking tell them about cookies, cache, etc and show them how to do it themselves next time because if it's only affecting them, it's a them problem, not a company problem and they can fix it themselves quickly and easily next time
_"Teach a man to fish..."_
_"Teach a MAN"_
_"a MAN"_
*Women generally don't fish, they expect to have it fished FOR them and served on a golden platter.*
Well in the old days, men used to bring home the bacon. Is bacon ok? Or does it have to be fish.
Hmmm. That's literally true of *zero* of my female coworkers
Tell me you've never lived in the Midwest. I know a shitload of women who fish.
I had a job where they literally had a section on mansplaining in the contract. You can't make that up.
She asked, "Why is the website not working?" But what she wanted answered is, "When will the website be working?"
Explaining something to someone as if they were a child helps them understand it much better.
IF THEY HAVE TO ASK SUCH AN ALL-ENCOMPASSING QUESTION IN THE FIRST PLACE ... Then they really do need it explained as if they are children, because that's almost certainly the level they are going to understand it on. If the question is more to the point and nuanced, then they can probably understand the "works in the industry" version.
And the "THEY" isn't necessarily always a woman. It can be your new, and completely useless boss, who has no clue what any of you actually do, and is only there because somebody is playing hide the sausage with someone they probably shouldn't be.
Yup, i work with a lot of specialists in various legal and scientific fields. I now lead qoth 'explain like i'm five' when we go into the weeds of some minutae of their expertise - makes sure i fully understand whatever the thing is and avoids a response full of jargon.
@@jecsquire9508 It's a good standard policy. Cheers to you!
It's called breaking it down Barney style. I could use big college twenty dollar words but.... Purple dinosaur.
@@johnrussell5592 thank you sir, may you find joy :)
By definition, it's only mansplaining if he's telling you something you already know in a manner that could be seen as condescending. She didn't know the answer to her question, ergo, not mansplaining.
by definition? so its officially derogatory?
@@justkev1044 Yes. Also, the assumption is that the man is explaining it to you on the assumption that a woman probably isnt as knowledgeable on the topic as he (a man) is.
So its "A man explaining something she already knows to a woman in a condescending way, on the assumption that someone of her sex wont be knowledgeable on the topic."
THAT would be mansplaining. And arguably, that actually is kinda offensive. But it also very very rarely ever happens, and is almost impossible to proof (Because telling what the motivation for explaining something was is very difficult. Was it bias, or was it the fact that he could see her - for example - make mistakes, mistaktes which someone knowledgeable on the topic wouldnt have made, and therefore decided to step in?)
You think feminists care about definitions and logic?
@@SchemingGoldberg Not at all. They're much more focused on double-standards and dominance these days.
"How do I explain 45,000 lines of code to someone who thinks 'windows' are what you have in a house?"
I'll stop mansplaining when you start womanunderstanding
Womanunderstanding is the reason we have to mansplain in the first place.
As a man entering his 60's this culture is actually terrifying. I'm dealing with medical issues that might disable me. I shutter to think my care might be handled by these critical women. I'm not sure I want to stick around for that.
just pray for a Filipino woman, theyre great
If it's a woman, make sure she's not western(ized). Best bet ever is to just try to get male caregiver. Safer for you, too (accusations).
Unfortunately the alternative is not much better- in my experience most doctors these days are coming to America 🇺🇸 from an extremely patriarchal foreign background. As in, you don’t want your female relative to have to be alone in a room with that guy, no matter how many paper credentials he has on the wall.
@@YoniBaruch-y3mOh great , falsely accuse male doctors of being gerontophiles.
Shameful.
I agree, one more reason men die too young.
And there is no simple answer to her question.
Ever ask a woman what's for dinner? Or how did work go?
Yupp. Well usually i ask. What do you want for dinner while we are at work then when i finish work before her i cook qhat she wanted
I already know what's for dinner. She has all her chores and tasks for the week posted in her room. I mean the kitchen
@@JohnPickup-CDHS-ze6qd I have that as well in my kitchen.
Yes. We are speaking to them like they are children, because they are...
People like you are the reason men are still out there and have not given up. Thank you for existing. Have a great life.
Bro this lady made me give up stfu 🙏🙏
When a woman tells you to stop mansplaining, just tell her to stop being so emotional.
(they can react wildly to this, so batten down the hatches first, and be _very_ mindful if it gets seemingly no reaction at all, because _that_ one is thinking of ways to get back at you.)
“We Must 'Mansplain'
because women suffer from Confusion,
and if we don't,
they will face the Consequences.”
Men often has to face consequences caused by women. Taking your house is one of them.
@@Tibor0803 indeed this was the severely edited version of that Con=Cun the blue hairs will try and strike you for saying *"Feminism"*
"I'm just venting" had me rolling 😂
I recall once when a women was being very helpful explaining the rules to a game when suddenly she stopped and apologized for womenplaining.
A women was made to feel guilty and apologize for being kind and helpful. My hatred of feminism grew by 10 times that day.
Finally, needed a woman to mansplain what mansplaining was. Now I know.
Oh my God, she is talking about me 😂
For all the women out there who consider this annoying - NERDS DO THIS ALL THE TIME not because they want to annoy you, but because they want to educate you a little bit about a very common problem that everyone encounters in their daily lives.
It's true, you can blame of person for being a little socially dense sometimes when their intentions are pure. I am very guilty of this.
Of course, I love when people explain things to me. If they don't I will badger them with questions and be annoying that way.
*Modern woman goes to the doctor, receives diagnosis*
"I'm so tired of these MALE doctors MEDsplaining to me about my health!"
*goes to female doctor, gets the same diagnosis*
UGH DOCTORS ARE ALL THE SAME, THEY THINK THEY KNOW BETTER THAN FACEBOOK!
A fool can ask more questions in a minute than a wise man can answer in a day.
This is what exactly happened to me.
My colleague (she) accumed me and raised an incident report to HR.
FFS
Don't want an explanation? Dont ask a question. Simple
If someone utters "mansplane" they are instantly getting blocked no matter what
Guys do this to guys too lol
With a bit more name calling depending on how good of friends.
Except that there seem to be more women who say "I stopped listening when you used a three syllable word." Sorry, this is unfair to women. Probably the group is "Misandrist".
The men that do this are stupid and ignorant, which is why they do it.
Men that actually care about learning and improving themselves will actively hear an explanation and learn from it. When I was in school, many years ago, there were a lot of people like that. They're were ignorant and the only knowledge they had was what happened on the game the day before, they weren't willing to learn anything new
This is why I always say "I don't know" or "I'm not sure" rather than telling them what could be wrong. You just can't solve people's problems anymore. Let them figure it out on their own.
As a man, this gives me hope that I might not be forever alone.
We "mansplain" so you the girls with air between their ears stop asking for "muffler Bearings and Blinker Fluid" at the auto parts store etc
Be sure to tell them that it's right under the Brake Grease.
Mansplaining is just how guys talk to each other fyi
Funny, y’all never seem to do it with other guys. Only women and girls when you *think* you know more than we do (and guess what, you’re not always right).
@@StarWarsomania We do it all the time, often you don't notice because other guys don't often react with hostility when a man wants to share information and teach someone else.
@@StarWarsomania In many cases, that is actually positive bias, believe it or not.
When a man clearly fucks up (because he lacks the knowledge to do it right),
and other men see it, we often just think:
"Damn, that guy is an idiot Oo".
But when we see women fuck up the same way, we think "Oh, she must lack that (previously mentioned) knowledge to succeed in this task, maybe i can help her by providing it"
So its not that we dont assume lack of knowledge on men, its that we are way more ok with men paying for their own lack of skill/knowledge than we are with women paying for theirs. Because, believe it or not, most men LIKE women, and dont like to see them fail.
i, an electrical engineering student.... was working in a call center.
And the men tried to explain to me how to fucking start a PC and open a browser.
They didnt explain it to ANY of the other MEN that were STARTING ANEW with me.
They ONLY talked to me like i had never seen a technical device in my life.
Is it because you were wearing University of Texas shirt?
@@SigFigNewton im from germany so i would say no.
He wasn't talking to her like a child.. He knows that a child wouldn't understand these things, but he did explain them to her.
Eventually i started saying NO to these people. They put stuff on their resume and then askfor help like they lied on their resume.
Don't want to be treated like a child, don't act like a child