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Why is it always a woman's responsibility to "Make his heart race" ??? It's rarely the other way around. If you sincerely care..... you would know that most women are just really tired of little or no integrity from men.
One time my husband and I were watching a movie and the hero was really buff, every muscle was chiseled to perfection. My husband used to be into weight lifting when he was younger so he noticed it more than me. He started comparing himself to the hero and pointed out his own physical "shortcomings". I turned to him and said, "I would much rather have you. He has no compassion in his eyes, you are full of compassion and gentleness and I would much rather have you than a man like him." I saw his whole face light up. He seemed to sit straighter and held me in a very tender, protective way during the rest of the film. (Edit) Wow, thanks for the likes! To my knowledge this is the first time I ever got over 1,000!
These things work, however I feel the problem some women are encountering is that they do not work on certain types of men. Men who are immature, irresponsible, emotionally unavailable. We must first learn to make good male choices. Men who are able to receive and appreciate feminime energy.
And some men desire a dominant masculine energy in their female partners. Sometimes men want the same level of masculine energy they have... in their female partner. It doesn't mean they aren't able to appreciate feminine energy or they're emotionally unavailable. It's just not their thing. Masculine energy definitely does not repel masculine energy lol
Correct. None of these would work on narcissistic men. If you said, ‘I would really love if you took me out this weekend’, the narcissist would say, ‘yes’ and when the weekend came around he would have forgotten about it, or would say he would take you out next weekend instead.😐. Only that would never happen. Keep future faking.🙃. Women need to see the red flags early. Thank you for this show because you show me how a normal man would act. I have been married to a narcissist for 34 years, so I haven’t seen the behaviors you are talking about. In my defense, 34 years ago there was no mention of narcissists, nor any TH-cam to warn us of these creatures. I am thankful young women today can see how you are acting about your woman and how a normal man reacts to her requests.🥰❤️👏🏼. If she sees the opposite behaviors-run as fast as Forrest Gump away from that man who only has eyes for himself.
@@julieanna8495 I'm sorry for you, may lord bless you w happiness. I have a question, if you dont mind, kindly help. Mostly, men in their dating phrase would go out of their comfort zone to woo the lady. In such situations, how to find the red flags? For eg: No guy would refuse a date during the courtship, but once after marriage all these tend to slowly change. How to find the red flags earlier in such case?
@@scalerup There are no stupid questions. Please pray regarding all life decisions. Talk to people who are in healthy relationships. Ask people who care about you what they think about people whom you are dating. Practice trusting your gut. Don't chase any man. Take time to get to know someone who is also interested in getting to know you. Never settle. Many blessings my dear.
For my husband, it was the way I looked at him (invitation in my eyes) and smiled at him that encouraged him to take my hands in his, and when I let my hands stay in his, he stood up, pulled me to him and kissed me. I had been kissed before but never like that. His kiss was tender and passionate at the same time, a promise that he would always love me, care for me and protect me. He kept that promise for all the 52 blessed years we were together. I was a successful professional woman, but with him I was just his wife, best friend and lover. My ex-secretary once said to me: " I notice when you talk to Jim on the phone your voice is very soft." He was and will always be the only one in all the world to me.
@TahoeSnowbird This is so beautiful. I can feel your love for each other through the time and distance. You must miss him very much. I’m so sorry for your loss. ❤️🩹
Wow, in the olden days men hunted, built, discovered new lands, today they look for their masculinity in choosing a restaurant, times have indeed changed. Real heroes of our time
No one’s looking for a hero here, lady. People fall in love with other people because of the way they make them feel about themselves. That’s all this guy trying to get across.
One thing we can do as moms of little heroes is to start this from the beginning. I know people will hate on it but I taught my boys to be little heroes. Told them that they have different strength and characteristics that must be used for good and not evil. Taught them small things that would matter later, opening doors, killing the bugs, leaving the end of a straw wrapper on a drink when delivering it, and a multitude of things probably seen as sexist that they may or may not embrace. So far, they have made incredibly amazing adult men who desire to protect and lead.
That’s a great idea. Boys need so much attention to the little things like that when they’re young to grow into decent, wonderful, considerate gentlemen. Once these things are established it grows into bigger things. Their future wives or partners will be so grateful.
@@jayashiaco9476 True, girls don't need to be saved, but do I want to live in a world where men and women treat each other thoughtfully? YES. Plus, there are just things I'd prefer not to do unless I choose to. There's power in receiving. ☺️ My boyfriend is strong and gentle (he carries bugs outdoors when my impulse is to smash it) and I admire his healthy masculinity in taking care of my desire to not have it around, however he does it. ☺️
As a mom of three adult sons with their own families now, I agree with you 100%👍🏻We moms make such a difference teaching them how to be good men, taking our responsibility and opportunity seriously. Good job, mom👏👏👏
Guess that's what Mom meant when she told me, "You can get a man to do anything for you if you know how to ask him". .. and her man, my father did. He adored her til the end.
Mat really knows what he’s talking about. Stroking a man’s ego by showing how much you respect him is exactly what our men feed on. Women need to hear their loved and men need to feel that they’re respected.
@@kkc6155well you have to start out with respect, you have to start somewhere, that’s kind of a crappy attitude, If you are in any kind of relationship, you should treat each other with respect. What if you were trying to to let him know what you need, and he shot back with, that is earned
1. Stand your feminine ground. 2. Create invitations instead of directives. 3. Hero-size him, instead of criticize. Another great video! Thanks for the reminders.
@Monica Duquette Never too late! Bonus Tip #4: Generously make love to him on his command. He will be far less likely to cheat, and if he still does, he will do it less.
@@monicaduquette8453 and don’t forget #5 Your man is never, ever wrong remind him often that so his masculine energy you were unable to make decisions, hold down a job, pick out a restaurant
My husband is the hero of my story. He isn’t very tall, and he’s soft spoken. But height and booming voice aren’t what make a man manly. He’s very capable, he’s so smart, he’s there for me when I’m having trouble and need a hug. He’s quiet and never needs to brag, because he has so much self confidence that he doesn’t need to tell others how awesome he is. I am so glad I watched this video because I have noticed that when I stop demanding and start asking, offering, he responds much more positively. I’ll do this more often. My mother emasculated my father by putting him down, mocking him, making him feel stupid and small. It made all of us kids treat him similarly. And I always felt terrible about that when I got to know him better as an adult and realized that he wasn’t stupid, that he was just lacking in self esteem from being pushed around by a wife who didn’t appreciate all of the great things that he did. I don’t want to be that way with my own husband. I want to build him up so that he feels good around me and acts in kind. ❤️
This is so beautiful!! I love how you're able to see what your mom did and how damaging that is and do the complete opposite to your husband! My sister in law criticizes my brother and puts him down and this is in front of the family I can only Imagine how she treats him behind closed doors on a daily basis. It makes me so sad how backwards relationships can be. The right kind of insight and compassion and capacity to grow is what we all need. Love your comment. Your husband is lucky to have you,😘
Yes absolutely! My husband now is the manliest man but he isn't as tall or big as last husband or others I dated but they where all jerks who thought way too much of themselves without being any of it. My husband now is so amazing in everyway and I love and respect him so much. He makes me feel safe loved and cared for. He is such a great husband and he is truly my best friend. I hope everyone has that in thier life. I've always been very feminine and I'm retired military and know men very well years of working with all kinds and ages and learned a lot. I'm also not impressed by lots of men and many who are very handsome and other things most women look for turn out to be worst and think they can just get any woman and arrogant. I think I got the best one and feel so fortunate especially after my exhusband and that experience. We both came to table with a lot to offer and did things completely differently than I ever had. I took things slow and didn't get physical for long time and built it up and laid a great foundation in process and learned a lot. It also had an effect of making him only want and think of me when all these other beautiful women where throwing themselves at him. He would drop anything for me and even knowing that even if I stayed with him didn't mean he was getting anything when others where definitely going to, he chose me . He is the most trustworthy and honest person I've met and has good heart but definitely manly in everyway. It's not about just being submissive it's just being in your natural softer feminine energy and think lots of women are turned off thinking they have to pretend to be something not or too giving to man. There is also balance because men also like to see your Fiesty side without being a target of you being overly masculine. He didn't see my really loving softer side till I decided he was one. Now he will call me out when I'm being too aggressive or masculine lol but in playful way but enough to know that obviously I'm having trouble and it may be something external causing it. Not having my father around growing up I didn't see dynamics of marriage relationship and had to build my own.
I’ve been married almost 37 years. Back when I met my husband in a bar and he asked me for my number, cell phones didn’t exist. I smiled and said “I’m in the book” and walked away. He found me in the phone book and called me a couple days later. The rest is history😊
Being a very feminine woman I was always drawn to very masculine men. I got my soulmate for 33 years, my love, a huge rugby playing, country sports loving man. 6' 3 to my 4' 11. I felt treasured and loved always. I miss him so very much. He told me every day he loved me very much and loved being with me. How lucky was I to be married to this wonderful man. Great advice on this video.
My husband has many health concerns. I tell him how brave he is for dealing with what life has handed him, how proud I am of him, and that I love him. It makes him not feel so negative but helps him see his strength in dealing with it.
And he does have courage where courage is most needed. My husband was always my hero but never more that when is was ill and dying. I so hope I can be as good as him.
I'm enjoying this so much. Everything he's saying is on the mark. I grew up the daughter of an NHRA champion drag racer. At age 5 I was gapping spark plugs. By the age of ten I was breaking down and rebuilding engines with my Dad. I'm very feminine, nothing masculine about me, but the fact I happen to know more about cars than the men I've dated lol. Except my late husband. He found this sexy. Because he was a car guy. He loved to listen to me talk all his car guys under the table. Talk about my first car, a 1970 Chevelle SS, 396 4 speed Posi rear-end lol. He loved it after I ran my Dads dragster down the quarter mile and took off my helmet letting my long hair fall down my back. Now this right here is a confident man who supported everything I wanted to do. I'm a tiny girl and he was this big handsome tall guy who worked on one of those big oil rigs in the middle of the ocean in California. I miss him so much. I wish all you single ladies are able to find your dream guy. I found mine, I miss him everyday. God Bless
@@zsrz4877 Thank You, I feel so blessed to have had the most wonderful Dad along with my husband, the Love of my life. My Dad always called my husband son. They had such a great bond. My husband said it was because of how much they loved me. That alone still leaves me a bit speechless. God Bless
Can fell the love you had for this man. So special. Makes me miss my "teddy bear too. 25 years on I still miss my late hubby and best friend. Lost our only child 5 years ago. Life has been full of tragedy but those 2 men adored me. Its great to be so loved.
@@kristasmith8934 so sweet and I'm sorry you lost him. Your story reminds me of that song from The King And I - "Hello Young Lovers". You had the best ❤
@@rosiebottom3870 Thank You so much. He really was the best. He didn't have to say much, the way he looked at me was a billion I Love You's. I would catch him just watching me with that spark in his eyes. It's a love that you can't move on from when there's a loss. You cherish it always, it's your treasure and you know nothing else out there can compare. God Bless
I know this sounds manipulative but most people don't like you, they just like the way you make them feel. I truly believe this. Once I've realised this, I've become so much more successful in life and career. People aren't difficult to please😊
this is true in very basic and surface level relationships. this is not love. when you love somebody, you love them for who they are, not for how they make you feel.
I agree with nukacloud as to some people. However, both in friendship and a romantic relationship isn't it always better to be positive? Why would we want to make somebody feel like crap. As you get to know another person, then you see that it is a mutually beneficial relationship. If it isn't...and someone is using you let them go. And NEVER become involved jus for what people can do for you. We can use little ways to even make random strangers feel good. If you are telling truth it is not manipulative! Walk up to somebody say wow your outfit is amazing. Or you are wonderful with your makeup...your eyeliner is fab.
I usually trust people who make me uncomfortable with their honesty. Manipulative people tend to be rly attractive so that is one thing I have learned.
This makes so much sense. I'm super feminine, but my husband didn't have the masculine energy I was attracted to. I felt like I kept having to be the man in the relationship, making me deeply unhappy. When I met a masculine man after my husband and I broke up, and saw how he reacted to my femininity, I felt a million times better and like I could be myself around him. It was such a good feeling!
I understand completely. I got so tired of him being in his feminine energy ALL THE TIME, and didn't want to feel like I had to carry both the masculine and feminine energies & roles. When I first dated a few very masculine men, it was both such a relief and pleasure to feel like I could relax, but was also so much of a turn on.
My husband oscillates between feminine and masculine energy…I do also, and it can be very off-putting and confusing for us. I’ve personally felt really weird about it for years.
Yes. I have made the mistake of picking men who do not have masculine energy OR I have been taught (through the feminist movement) that I have to act like a man, be driven and focused, and be in charge which resulted in feminine men being attracted to me. Either way, it has not worked. I got tired of being the man while looking at my man who was afraid to be in charge. So now, I am diligently working on tapping into my feminine energy and also presenting myself much more femininely. It is late in my life but better late than never.
so right - when a man treats his wife & daughters with love, kindness, protection & great manners, the daughters will grow up knowing that's how men should treat them. be that guy who she'll compare everyone to. she won't be picking losers.
Nope, I agree with you. Wouldn't matter how or who you are to some men (or some women). Some are just manipulative a holes, just out to use and abuse. Guess I need to meet some nicer people?!
I have always said the way you keep a partner happy is to treat them like a king/queen, pamper them, nurture them, and at the same time let them know if they treat you badly, you’ll kick him to the curb in a heartbeat. People are quickly bored by a “doormat”. Shifting from the feminine power to the masculine, when necessary, is important. I am a female who has more masculine energy, and my husband has even more masculine energy. I never ever treat my husband like my employee, I treat him like a king. But there is a line, and if he crosses it, I let him know and push back hard. He finds that irresistible.
Ladies free yourself from getting lost in these types of relationship rules. Do not get lost in playing games. There are good men for everyone and if you want one that fits you, BE YOU! Not every man is a risk taker. In order for a man to feel his masculinity he needs to have it to begin with, and each man is an individual in how he gains his confidence so support him to be all he can be. He was initially attracted to you for a reason and you to him, trust in this. Listen with an open heart, communicate with honesty and always, always respect one another's space.
It's good to learn how men work in their masculine self. Too many women castrate men without even know what they are doing. This is something that is rarely talked about or learned. It's important to know this as it can pull you in a space of better understanding of how your man works. I get what you're saying, don't play games, but do try to understand a man's masculinity and how your femininity works.
I've used the Hero tool. It's powerful. I asked my man to fix my bicycle for me. When he was done I said, "you are my hero you just fixed my bike and provided me with so much joy because I can ride my bike now." When I said, "you're my hero" I saw his chest puff out and his arms raise like he was super man. He had the biggest smile on his face. It was awsome!!! Yes ladies let's "Hero Size Him not Criticize Him"
I had similar experience with my bf. He's never picky about food and never cares about wine and gourmet and all that things. And I'm a fantastic cook and growing up in a culture that food is 80% of life. So every time he asked me to pick restaurants because I'm picky and know what kind of restaurants have good food. But the thing is, I naturally dislike making decisions on where to go or do on a date. So last Valentine, I insisted on him picking the restaurant, which made him anxious at the beginning because he worried he would ruin the night. But he picked an amazing Italian place that surprised me and himself. That's one of the most impressive date night we had. Now he fell in love with making dining decisions and each of our dates are getting better ♥
I run my life, it doesn't run me and sometimes it's so easy to slip into masculine energy! My husband is a big burly man with grizzly bear tendencies that can definitely handle me... but what you said still resounds. He LOVEs to please me and giving him that space instead of directing him into that space makes things even more amazing!! Thanks for the great tips!
I have a guy friend who I’m kinda starting to develop feelings for. We hung out at his place last week. I’ve been single since preschool, and because I’ve had to do so much on my own for myself, I was so used to leading with masculine energy. I’m also a creative and love to build and plan and create. But I’ve been learning from watching relationship videos like this how to lean into my feminine energy when I’m around guys. Anyway, I was helping him transplant plants in his garden. It was already getting to be early evening, and all I had eaten that day was a handful of almonds and the keto equivalent of a candy bar. So I was kinda getting a little hungry. Perhaps a year ago I would have kept my mouth shut and suffered through the evening without saying anything, and grabbed something on my way home. But this time around I actually decided to voice what I was feeling, and do it in a way that wasn’t pushy, but still clear. After the second re-stating of my desire for food, he took me back inside and made me an amazing spread of food, and we talked the entire time he was cooking. I’m really grateful to have him in my life, and he’s teaching me what it looks and feels like to be cared for.
I literally wish I had seen this video in my 20s it would have saved me so much time and heartache from failed relationships not knowing how to deal with men and their different needs. I Didn’t have a father growing up so I very much learned to be more aggressive and in my masculine energy. It’s so amazing that you’re teaching this to clueless women like me.
So true, if women grow up without a father or brothers, we don't really understand masculinity that well, and we do develop that masculine energy of our own. For sure this has been true for me. I'm still struggling to find a better balance because I have realized men feel intimidated by my personality, and I don't want that.
I had a guy offer me two choices on our first date after I told him i ate vegetarian. It was thoughtful and masculine and not pushy. I let him pick, but I liked he gave me the choice.
What? Long gone are the days when men should be choosing what women eat when they take them to dinner. This is NOT a sign of chivalry. A man picking your date’s food for them is a red flag and a sign of a controlling misogynist. Also, most of this man’s blather is just that, blather. Just love, praise and talk to one another like human beings. Happily married for 37 years
I did those 3 tips without knowing that and he once said “ wow with you I can feel myself more like a man and it reflects on how you’re beautiful lady and that’s rare “♥️
Miranda, I'm all in for that way of dealing with the masculine and feminine. But, can you tell me, how do you go about the fact when he choses the wrong venture, (bad food, bad surroundings, not your taste, etc..), or when he isn't from that place, and doesn't know the language or habits??? Thanks for any helpful advice. 🙏
I'm in trouble! I am attracted to very masculine men but I am a strong woman who gives off masculinity because I've had to protect myself against men. I look feminine, dress feminine and am feminine but with men I tend to show more of my masculinity. I think it's a subconscious way to ward them off as self protection.
I soften my voice when I go into my masculine energy when I have to set a respectful boundary. It helps to to invite him into a conversational tone where I can help him see where he is being stronger than necessary. It helps him to see he is still the confident man who is providing solutions in our relationship with my input.
I legit followed through all three steps yesterday with a guy, it was new for me to do and not take charge (lean into my feminine energy), and he sounded so pleased and motivated in his plans for us to go out and hang out. This is someone I do not want to lose as we finally have our timing right later in life to come together, and Im not gonna do my old habits that didn't attract the masculine man I wanted.
Matt Boggs.... YOU THE MAN!!! I have been watching you for over two years, just when I started dating, now my husband. You were so helpful and now that we have been married for more than a year, I check in with you often, to make sure I am reminded and staying on course with my feminine side. Thank you for being so helpful. My life has improved so much through your behavior teachings, thank you!
When we are out and he ask what I want to drink... I look into his eyes and sweetly say "May I please have a glass of wine and a soft kiss?" He melts, and it lets me relax and be feminine and lets him know that I am giving him the gift to be masculine and lead strong, and I say "Thank you Love"
A few weeks ago I texted my person of interest, asking to toot a tune on his sax while I would undergo a medical procedure. He gladly responded and requested that I keep him posted. I texted that I felt mellow and smiled during the procedure and asked what he played. He sent me a beautiful jazz rendition of "Peace". I responded that this rare gem transported me serenely way beyond the moon. He texted me a lovely heart emoji. This is from a man who makes sure that he remain stoic, not showing his feelings. Not this time...
Thank you, Matt. I wasn’t aware of the concept of the masculine vs feminine energy. I saw this about 8 months ago and did a lot of housework on it. I reacquainted myself with my feminine side and it absolutely changed everything. I’m happier now. And the best part… yes, I finally found my man. He is absolutely everything I was hoping for in a relationship. Thank you for helping me figure out this part of my life. Love to you and your team and family.
How to increase your feminine energy? Dress like a lady (not a tramp), walk like a lady, sit like a lady, wait for him to open doors for you and thank him when he does, take his arm when crossing the street.... BE a lady and he will be more masculine. Wearing ratty t-shirts, jeans with holes in them and flip flops is not going to ignite his masculinity. BE a lady and BE feminine by using perfume, doing your makeup and hair, having manners, not swearing - and asking his opinion. Why did men feel masculine around Marillyn Monroe, Betty Grable, Elizabeth Taylor? Those 1940's and 1950's woman wore dresses and were feminine in ways we've forgotten! We could learn from emulating them.
Nah. Nothing wrong with t-shirts and jeans, especially when dresses are either too cold or dressing up too much. Men don't want a high maintence doll, either. Many women, like myself, are allergic to makeups and perfumes so we can't wear them. If a guy needs me to be a stereotype and uncomfortable in my own skin, he needs therapy, not a relationship.
Well, the 1940s and 1950s ladies didn’t have a choice. They had to look/dress really, really well, because they had to hook rich men for marriage or else it’s penny pinching for them the rest of their lives with limited career paths. It was survival for them to catch rich men.
Agreed minus the clothing part. Dresses, bright colors, heels are cute but femininity is much more and goes much deeper than the clothing girls wear. Whatever you wear needs to make you feel good and sexy and if thats in jeans i say go for it! Its energy not material clothing.
Hi Mat, Ive been happily married for 23 years- married since 18 and he was 21.....So I speak from experience when I say your advise is on the mark! I listen to you cuz everything you talk about are things I believe from experience are true This is something I've always believed that a man you love should be treated like a king and he in return will treat me like a queen . It's a mutual dance ! My man is very masculine I am very feminine - after 23 years and 6 kids we are still wildly attracted to eachother not just physically but emotionally ! Everything you say about hero-sizing him is true and he loves how I let him lead and he spoils me with his sweetness and love . You rune a great channel and I'm sure you help a lot of people have healthy well balanced relationships :-) Best of luck !
3 Feminine Qualities that the Masculine energy finds highly Attractive: 4:08 Stand your feminine Ground (1) 4:40 Example of this 7:17 Create invitations instead of directives (2) (making requests) 8:00 Example of this 9:59 "Hero-Size" him, instead of criticizing him (3) (Appreciate him, celebrate him)
I love the way you speak about “masculine energy “ and “feminine energy “ rather than men and women because we are all made up of both regardless of our actual gender. This is something that many influencers don’t acknowledge. Good on you!
Such valuable information Matt! I have found that letting a man know that you value him, his efforts, the big & little things he does for you is so important. Yesterday the man i am dating made a simple but wonderful lunch for the two of us. I loved that he did that without really even asking what do you want to eat. He just planned it & did it. I was so freeing for me. I am usually the one making all the decisions and the executing the ideas. its so nice to have someone else do that for me. ❤
@@RelentlesslyBecoming Ooh really far for me I love ❤❤love 😍😍love 🌷🌷so so much really I like u I want to meet you I m intrested with u S eriousely 💑💑💝💝🌹🌹
I was meeting this guy who I've been dating for dinner. As I was walking from the parking lot to the restaurant, he was also walking towards the restaurant. Instead of walking towards him, I stopped and waited for him so we could walk together. I could've easily walked to him, but I made him come to where I am, increasing my feminine and his masculine energy.
After more than four decades of marriage, I tell him how he has always been attractive to me, from the first time I met him till today. When we looked at a picture of our family a couple days ago I pointed to him and said, look at how incredibly handsome you are. My husband is a fabulous cook. Whenever he makes something I act like I’m eating something very delicious and tell him what a great cook is and how lucky I am. Like you said, it’s about focusing on the good things he has and not on things he does not have. Also, whatever you say has to be true. A smart man will dislike a phony compliment.
I am fortunate to have a husband who is confident in his gorgeous masculinity. He is a kick ass father, too. I can be a bit dominant, but over 40 years together, I have learned when I can lean into my feminine energy and when to lean into his masculine amazing self. We have a wonderful dynamic that continues to uplift both of us.
Yeah, making him a hero is all fine. After 20 years of always praising and making him the hero… it would be great to receive a little bit of that in return. At least a small bit of recognition for the multitude of things that I do would be really nice. He doesn’t criticize but he doesn’t offer any recognition, acknowledgment, or appreciation in return. Guess what has happened … making him a hero has stopped. When he feeds the dogs I thank him and tell him I appreciate it. Do I get that back? No. I’m done with making him my hero.
Great advice. I’ve also found that men subconsciously respond to seeing unabashed admiration shine in a woman’s eyes, because that admiration is an unprotected, vulnerable invitation into a woman’s heart and thoughts.
Saying that I trust his judgement...has shown to be the rigtig words in many situatiations..just lige you described..his chest pumpts up and he walks like je owns the street 😄
I know as a woman that I have had to always lead it seems. I have found someone who leads. It is such a breath of fresh air. All I have to do is just by being myself create this wonderful relationship. Thank you so much Mat for sharing this insight. I have actually said "You are the best at being my man" He was blown away!!!
So true. Last time a man took care of me choosing places and food, and when he saw I am genuinely happy from his choice, he was soo happy too! And wanted to give even more🥰
Great insight! So many of us were raised by single/divorced Moms who had to be strong so we didn't learn the feminine/masculine balance. Thank you for sharing this!
I'm really into praising my husband of 39 years, I loved to hug him and tell him he's a hard worker and great cook. I love to see him smile and yes, his chest kinda puffs up. Great video!!!
Twice in the past three months I have found two different men who were extremely similar. They both had all of the qualities I was looking for, except for the fact that they were both emotionally unavailable. It’s just validation for me that the universe has my back and is letting me know that the man who IS emotionally available and has all these other qualities is out there, and he’s waiting for me too
FINALLY SOMEONE EXPLAINED!!!! I tolld my man this: " a woman in me loves a man in you. And a man in me is in love with a woman in you".......now i hear this publicly...woow, fantastic!!!! Its the deepest truth, and helps a lot. All people should understand this!!!!! Man, you are fantastic, helpful and soo motivational, inspirational. Simply loooooove listening to you👏❤️❤️❤️❤️
This is really good for us women that are used to doing for ourselves but want to get back in the dating world... This was really helpful for me. Thank you
A strong feminine in any person is ACTIVELY RECEPTIVE. It says, " I know who I am and there is room for you." The passive person who says "I don't know what I want, you choose" or the dominating person who says "I get to decide everything" is not someone in balance or mature. The passive model is what most people still mistakenly think of as "feminine" and many men like "feminine" women in this mode of submission. An immature man who needs a pat on the head for everything is also not someone with a strong center.
I practice saying "how gentlemanly of you" (little house on the prairie miss ingalls) to any man that opens the door for me, lets me go first through a doorway, praise their appearance: what a great looking shirt! etc. Guys will start to chat and small talk after that.
I’ve always been myself and I give off very feminine energy !!!! I am a woman of 55 yrs old I’ve always been told they’ve never met a woman quite like me. You have to let them kinda think they’re “the man” and follow their lead. They love that, you can plant the seed and it will grow into his idea…….anyone else like this? Just be yourself if you’re soft feminine and if hard try being a little more soft ad let him take the reign!!! Sit back ad enjoy your man Just my own thoughts
Words of affirmation and showing respect too. When he does a project - admire how great it looks and how much better the new (sink, wall, countertop, floor, anything) looks and will be for the future.
This is amazing advice! I’ve been happily married for over 25 years and have a great husband. I’ve been waking up to how incredibly lucky I am. I want to double down on making my man happy. This will be put to use!
We were having issues bc of my masculine energy. I never ask him for favors or even money...after so many things happened I realized that I need to show more feminine energy. I've started telling him what I want and what I don't like. I think the turning point was...I always win in arguments and even though he knows that he is wrong, he just wants to win once lol I let him win and well he start listening better now. It's always him being so against me on everything. So I learn that for him sometimes even if I feel my idea is better let him lead too. After that he leads and listen to me better now because he no longer feel so against me lol
@@Nina-hk7ub yes do ask bc he will be happy to give you money. It will help build a bond between you two. Him investing in you will make him value you more. Men wants to be provider so it help his ego too. Back then I was way too independent...and learned the hard way. Now I ask him for money and he says yes most of the time unless he was really short then it'll be on the next paycheck. Saying thank you made him feel very appreciated 😊 truth is a man that loves you will be willing to spend on you as long as it makes you happy. Just say thank you and give him your brightest smile 😁
This is wonderful! I find that when I truly put myself first and take good care of myself. My feminine energy comes out a lot more. I wear more dresses and a bit of makeup. He loves it… And so do I! Thank you!
I'm so happy having my ex fiance back , after being separated for 4 months . All thanks to Mr God's sent. who help me to get back my ex again , I will suggest y'all get help from him and it works within 3days
This has been hard for me at time. I raised both my kids on my own and so I have had to do everything and used to doing well.. Everything. I have had to play this masculine role that I don't want play but its hard to let the guy plan, pay, do things...
I'm so happy having my ex fiance back , after being separated for 4 months . All thanks to Mr God's sent. who help me to get back my ex again , I will suggest y'all get help from him and it works within 3days
Everything you have said makes total sense. I apparently did most things wrong during my 30 year marriage with my late hubby. Wish I had seen this video then.
I love that you talk about the masc and fem energies! Not many men do and I am on a spiritual TF journey with my DM and this is very appropriate! Thank you! I learned to switch more into my feminine energy of flow, and let him come to me, to take the pressure off energetically! We are a long distance and kind of in separation but I can feel him coming closer, now that I've balanced my energy and letting him take the lead when he's ready :)
I’m not sure why I’m posting this but I just have to say I’m torn on this… I get what you’re saying and I really appreciate the insight… It’s important for men to feel they’re doing things right… It’s also important for women to feel that way… I completely agree that nitpicking and negativity are A total turn off and no one likes them… But if I am stepping up to help someone who can’t figure out where to go for dinner, in my mind I’m being polite, and what you’re saying is I am emasculating him… Maybe not overtly… So all this time when I’m trying to be polite and help solve problems what you’re saying is that’s the reason men pull back is they feel incompetent… I guess maybe the truth hurts… ouch sorry that was harsh… I appreciate your point And I am guessing I’m not the only one who did not know… I like the way you presented tue situation because what you suggest is really not hard to do… I had one boyfriend that I used to let order for me… And it made him feel like a hero… it works situationally… But I don’t think it’s some thing that will actually over come someones full insecurity.
This is such a great video and easy to understand. I love my husband so much and find that I sometimes already do these things. I grew up with an abusive father and my mom was a homemaker and felt unable to support my sister and I on her own. She felt stuck in an abusive marriage. My mother instilled in my sister and I to go to college, to earn money, to be independent. Luckily, I found a great man when I was in college, have since graduated, and am in a great career. My now husband and I have been together for eighteen years. I still have times where I'm afraid to feel controlled but trust him to also make decisions. Thank you for sharing this video. 💕
You are truly one of the very BEST "Therapists" I have ever heard! I do LOVE so much of what you say & a realize so much of how I do so many things wrong! Your wife is a Lucky SMART WOMAN!!
Thanks for the tips. To answer your questions, one thing that def. works when I don't want to argue about something that is not important, esp. if winning the argument means I lose romantic ground, I don't argue facts. I tell the truth differently by paraphrasing what he said so he knows he has been heard, and then I say, "but something about that doesn't feel right." Then after he repeats his point with zeal, I say again, "I understand what you are saying, but, well, something about that just doesn't feel right to me." Last time I did that the guy said, mostly to himself, "so something there doesn't feel right . . . " after which he promptly changed the subject and we moved on.
I'm so happy having my ex fiance back , after being separated for 4 months . All thanks to Mr God's sent. who help me to get back my ex again , I will suggest y'all get help from him and it works within 3days
This was such good points. I’m very assertive and such, but I’ve learned that taking over and saving people weakens them unknowingly. It was hard at first, but I’ve come to the conclusion that having primarily feminine energy doesn’t make you any less powerful/assertive (weak or small), but it allows different opportunities that having only one set of energy does not. Empowering people is always best for everyone.
So true. I do this a lot and especially men tend to dislike it. If I give them advice or information to better their lives it makes them feel weaker and more defensive. One thing is them asking for it and another is giving it when you think you should.
So right about the masculine/feminine energy. I see all of these long marriages where two people just are with each other. The female decided early on that he was not doing what she thought he should, so she took over. It destroys the balance long term and also affects the children.
Tips start at 4:07. ☺️ I love these! Great job and thank you. I struggle with these cuz I “do it all”, but recently due to an injury have needed to ask for help. I love appreciating the great jobs men are doing. It feels good to me too to “hero-size” them. I started practicing in my mind saying, “I would love if you…” for my someday future man. ❤️
Interesting. I am both fascinated by these techniques, and at the same time exhausted at the notion. There's something contradictory about having to manipulate (or trick) your man into using his masculine energy as if he has no control of his own. The fact that the woman needs to make that happen is the opposite of what I think of when I think of masculine. In a sense the woman is STILL using her masculine energy to pretend to be feminine in order to get the man to be masculine. Hilarious and ironic. There's also something maternal about it and, of course, that's not sexy. I'm not criticizing mind you, just exploring your concepts further precisely because they are thought provoking.
Yes, exhausted. My mother was the master at bringing out the masculine, but I saw it merely as manipulation. She taught me these things as well and while I've never had a shortage of interested men, there are very few I am interested in. I'd rather have an intellectual equal over batting my eyes and pretending I'm incompetent. Now, I am only speaking for myself here, some women are very comfortable in this way, I just personally am not.
Value verbally his ideas Been married 52 years. I’m a feminine know it all. It was one hard lesson to master letting go of my opinion and allowing his to stand. Like magic it caused good compromise
LOVE this so much. ❤️ My masculine energy has always been more dominant. I am very independent and go after everything I want and really make things happen for me, so I have always approached everything with that same energy. Now I understand why some things didn't work out in the past when it comes to the opposite sex. Really going to try to increase my feminine energy and use this approach from now on. Thank you for this amazing insight. ☺️👌🏻💯🤗
Part of the issue for me is that while I would love to have a man that is a go-getter and provider I always seem to end up with the extreme end of that. Controlling, Possessive, and Stubborn men who call themselves "alpha males" I tend to be very feminine in relationships and don't mind compromising and giving a little wiggle room and this has just attracted men who completely bulldoze my feelings, wants and needs. I'm always expected to do all the compromising so that they are happy. I just end up lonely, frustrated, and trying to fit my personality and feelings into a box to please him. I've been separated now for a year after a 10 year long marriage and am working on building up healthy boundaries while raising my kids and starting a new career. I don't know when I'll be ready for another relationship, if ever but I don't seem to attract anyone other than jerks because of my feminine nature.
I'm curious if you've looked into attachment styles or if you have some unresolved childhood trauma. Those two things have a lot to do with what we attract and who we're attracted to. My friend pointed out that I attract very needy, immature, profoundly conflicted guys. In any case, I wish you well in your healing!
@@chriskiesling9387 But even if one does find an unresolved trauma, or childhood event, we can't always know how to change the attraction we have, rooted deep down... I don't think all comes down only to attraction. There are higher amounts of unavailable men, in the world, than available ones. That's a fact. Women have to do both roles, most of the time. Another fact! This is mostly due to the decades before, I won't go into that. But, instead of always blaming attraction laws etc, one must take into account more factors one has no hand upon!! Afcourse, the mind can direct many things, but not all!
Shannon, same here... So frustrating. I've been through decades of hardships and heartbreaks. It sucks big time. No childhood trauma, or so. I noticed that being a giver, by nature deep down, (and I love to give), makes certain people being attracted to me. Even without them knowing. They just feel it. That's the core of a person. Either you're a giver or a taker. In your core. Afcourse, afterwards one tries to balance that out. But, I'm talking about the core. Givers are much rarer than takers, at the moment, too. So there is an unbalance. One doesn't have everything in one's hand. There's only so much one can do, the rest is up to the Universe! Grounding and feeling good inside is key to a happier life. Give to yourself, and try and be more selective and assertive, maybe that can help? Take care. 🤗
A lot of men (not real men, with the right Masculine energy) nowadays interpret those feminine actions as weak, indecisive, and too kind. Thus, these women tend to be manipulated, badly treated and are unsatisfied. It's really very frequent to see that. Society has changed genders a lot... 😓 And the mix of cultures, religion, etc.., makes things even more difficult. Interesting, but way more challenging than before.
@Ambriel Apps It’s not that masculine men view a woman’s femininity as “weak, indecisive, and too kind”. It’s that their desires make no logical sense, and that the situation must be clamped down on with decisiveness. Masculine men want a very submissive, kind woman; it’s that their women too often want to be irresponsible with spending, can’t stop using social media apps that frequently double as hookup apps, don’t want to make love on cue, or want a “girls night out” and therefore be too tempted to get their back blown out by some tall, hot guy looking for random fun. That kind of stuff. Masculine men know this, and they want to prevent it. They don’t have time for games; they’re too busy getting stuff done. If you want more perspective from this end, study the How To Relationship TH-cam channel.
Wow! I’m so happy I found your channel! This is just what I needed! I’ve been doing it all wrong. I am masculine energy and I want masculine energy. I am not attracting masculine energy from a man because I need to recharge my feminine energy. This makes so much sense!!! Thank u!!
It resounded with me too!! I need to be in charge of my life and career but I LOVE it when my hubs expresses that masculine energy I crave... so I'm taking Mat's tips to heart and it's so interesting how it changes the dynamic!
Yep makes tons of sense. Ever get turned off by a broody, whiney man? I have, it makes my uterus shrivel up lol my ex was like that and I realized I felt like I was dealing with a moody women. So imagine how men feel when we act masculine? Obviously we have to be balanced and some instances require us to dial up one side more than the other, but this has been a learning experience for me.
Thank you so much for making this. I’ve learned more from your video than I from anyone anywhere in my whole life. Like please don’t stop making these no one is talking like you. How to be a full woman and make room for a full man and the fact that we have both energies within. I cannot express my gratitude. Truly feel enlightened. ❤❤❤
I enjoyed this video. I am married and I think I live out the more masculine role in my marriage in terms of directing and planning. However, it is good to learn about letting my husband lead b/c I honestly want to see him in that role more. Thank you.
Wonderful Matt 👏💎🇮🇪 Thank you. For me Feminine Energy is Moments with Silence. A lower voice to speak more softly. Let him some space. Kindness in every action. I listen more than I speak. 🌟💜🇮🇪
Wow! This explains so much and I'm thrilled that I just happened to click on your video. I, like most women, want our men to be MEN- we seek and crave the masculine energy to compliment our feminine energy!
My daughter is always saying this too! She's 46 and unmarried. I want to say how is not "playing games" or not "manipulating"working for you? When you look for a job you want, do you walk in and say you're looking for a well paying job that you don't have to start at the bottom for, and you don't know anything about the company--you just want a job!!! Everything in life that is worth while, takes preparation and a certain amount of game playing. It's like fishing--you don't just put a plain bare hook in the water! You have to put bait on the hook to lure the fish to bite. None of these ideas are lies, they are just a different way of presenting yourself.
@@dianethompson6804 no this isn’t quite the same thing. I would not want a man in my life who needed constant babying on my part. My brother’s low self esteem means this is how his marriage works It is just outrageous. The play acting goes way beyond the three points. It means not disagreeing with them most of time and never criticize which means just having to remind them they maybe forgot to do something but I bet they
@@fionad6338 constant babying is another whole different area. Attracting men and in a relationship are two different things. Everyone is on their best behavior while dating. Once you're in a relationship you both reveal your true selves and decide if that is what you want.
@@dianethompson6804 so present this fake persona to attract some guy then move into who you really are. Hopefully, you are a fully realized adult female who wants a relationship with an adult male who doesn’t need constant adoration. If he needs that he should get a dog I guarantee women who think this is good advice are in a relationship with immature, insecure men.
Thank you, Mat for such a great video. You did such a good job of explaining the male and female energies. I never thought of them being on opposite ends of a sliding scale. That little lady of yours is one smart cookie! You are so lucky to have found each other. I wish I could be more like her.
I'm so happy having my ex fiance back , after being separated for 4 months . All thanks to Mr God's sent. who help me to get back my ex again , I will suggest y'all get help from him and it works within 3days
As a mom of 4 adult males (youngest 18 yo) I feel that these principles would be great for ME to use when interacting with my sons. I want to empower them and I celebrate their masculinity; However, after watching this video, I realize that I have disempowered them to a degree with my masculine energy in those years they were under my care. I am 60 now but I never stop trying to improve myself. I will be using the insight provided in this video towards my sons, as it seems like it would be a good strategy for moms to bring out the best in their sons. Tragically, so many young men have been feminized by our modern culture.
We moms train our sons for their future wives. Then the wives work with our sons to become the best husband for the DIL. My son is teachable and adores his wife. He’s not perfect, but works with her to make their life the best it can be for them.
I completely relate to this. My husband left when our son was 4. I’ve been a single parent, and as such, I’ve been in my masculine energy providing, doing all the decision making, and making all the directives. My son has autism and is 17 now. He’s stopped growing 5’3”, so he’s tiny for a man, and he’s gay. However, he does have a lot of masculine energy. He’s an Aries and would like to be the initiator and driver of things. I really need to be more aware of how my masculine energy is holding him back.
Theres something very wrong with a lot of men these days. They just dont want any responsibility. Against this backdrop the relatively smaller number of men that are actually relationship material have so many options that women end up competing for their attention, which makes these women masculine and kills true , lasting attraction and love. I think the real root cause is the relatively small number of non toxic men
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Why is it always a woman's responsibility to "Make his heart race" ??? It's rarely the other way around. If you sincerely care..... you would know that most women are just really tired of little or no integrity from men.
have never been like you describe, have never been single, self-employed woman, couldn´t be like that
None of the links work for me
Hi. Did you block my comments to receive no more likes?
@Sun-lq6od never being single and being a wife are different.
One time my husband and I were watching a movie and the hero was really buff, every muscle was chiseled to perfection. My husband used to be into weight lifting when he was younger so he noticed it more than me. He started comparing himself to the hero and pointed out his own physical "shortcomings". I turned to him and said, "I would much rather have you. He has no compassion in his eyes, you are full of compassion and gentleness and I would much rather have you than a man like him." I saw his whole face light up. He seemed to sit straighter and held me in a very tender, protective way during the rest of the film.
(Edit) Wow, thanks for the likes! To my knowledge this is the first time I ever got over 1,000!
Awwww! I love this!
Aw....
So sweet
that was cute .
Awww 🥰 he's lucky to have you around.
These things work, however I feel the problem some women are encountering is that they do not work on certain types of men. Men who are immature, irresponsible, emotionally unavailable. We must first learn to make good male choices. Men who are able to receive and appreciate feminime energy.
And some men desire a dominant masculine energy in their female partners. Sometimes men want the same level of masculine energy they have... in their female partner. It doesn't mean they aren't able to appreciate feminine energy or they're emotionally unavailable. It's just not their thing. Masculine energy definitely does not repel masculine energy lol
Correct. None of these would work on narcissistic men. If you said, ‘I would really love if you took me out this weekend’, the narcissist would say, ‘yes’ and when the weekend came around he would have forgotten about it, or would say he would take you out next weekend instead.😐. Only that would never happen. Keep future faking.🙃. Women need to see the red flags early. Thank you for this show because you show me how a normal man would act. I have been married to a narcissist for 34 years, so I haven’t seen the behaviors you are talking about. In my defense, 34 years ago there was no mention of narcissists, nor any TH-cam to warn us of these creatures. I am thankful young women today can see how you are acting about your woman and how a normal man reacts to her requests.🥰❤️👏🏼. If she sees the opposite behaviors-run as fast as Forrest Gump away from that man who only has eyes for himself.
@@julieanna8495 I'm sorry for you, may lord bless you w happiness. I have a question, if you dont mind, kindly help.
Mostly, men in their dating phrase would go out of their comfort zone to woo the lady. In such situations, how to find the red flags? For eg: No guy would refuse a date during the courtship, but once after marriage all these tend to slowly change. How to find the red flags earlier in such case?
I'm 21, pretty new to dating world. Hence asking these stupid questions. Bear w me, please
@@scalerup There are no stupid questions. Please pray regarding all life decisions. Talk to people who are in healthy relationships. Ask people who care about you what they think about people whom you are dating. Practice trusting your gut. Don't chase any man. Take time to get to know someone who is also interested in getting to know you. Never settle. Many blessings my dear.
For my husband, it was the way I looked at him (invitation in my eyes) and smiled at him that encouraged him to take my hands in his, and when I let my hands stay in his, he stood up, pulled me to him and kissed me. I had been kissed before but never like that. His kiss was tender and passionate at the same time, a promise that he would always love me, care for me and protect me. He kept that promise for all the 52 blessed years we were together. I was a successful professional woman, but with him I was just his wife, best friend and lover. My ex-secretary once said to me: " I notice when you talk to Jim on the phone your voice is very soft." He was and will always be the only one in all the world to me.
Absolutely beautiful 😊❤ that’s love
Sound’s just like my husband of 55 years. His name was Jim too. He was a real Gem❤️
@TahoeSnowbird This is so beautiful. I can feel your love for each other through the time and distance. You must miss him very much. I’m so sorry for your loss. ❤️🩹
Oh. Yes! I am not the Boss at home...my husband is the leader...I follow, I appreciate, I indulge. We are blessed to have good men.❤❤
Your comment was like a mini Mills and Boon, lovely.🥰🥰🥰🥰
Wow, in the olden days men hunted, built, discovered new lands, today they look for their masculinity in choosing a restaurant, times have indeed changed. Real heroes of our time
No one’s looking for a hero here, lady. People fall in love with other people because of the way they make them feel about themselves. That’s all this guy trying to get across.
One thing we can do as moms of little heroes is to start this from the beginning. I know people will hate on it but I taught my boys to be little heroes. Told them that they have different strength and characteristics that must be used for good and not evil. Taught them small things that would matter later, opening doors, killing the bugs, leaving the end of a straw wrapper on a drink when delivering it, and a multitude of things probably seen as sexist that they may or may not embrace. So far, they have made incredibly amazing adult men who desire to protect and lead.
Imagine you taught them respect for living things and that girls don’t need saving. 😅
That’s beautiful. That’s healthy masculinity
That’s a great idea. Boys need so much attention to the little things like that when they’re young to grow into decent, wonderful, considerate gentlemen. Once these things are established it grows into bigger things. Their future wives or partners will be so grateful.
@@jayashiaco9476 True, girls don't need to be saved, but do I want to live in a world where men and women treat each other thoughtfully? YES. Plus, there are just things I'd prefer not to do unless I choose to. There's power in receiving. ☺️ My boyfriend is strong and gentle (he carries bugs outdoors when my impulse is to smash it) and I admire his healthy masculinity in taking care of my desire to not have it around, however he does it. ☺️
As a mom of three adult sons with their own families now, I agree with you 100%👍🏻We moms make such a difference teaching them how to be good men, taking our responsibility and opportunity seriously. Good job, mom👏👏👏
Guess that's what Mom meant when she told me, "You can get a man to do anything for you if you know how to ask him". .. and her man, my father did. He adored her til the end.
Wise words from a wise woman
So how do you ask him, I have always struggled with this.
Mat really knows what he’s talking about. Stroking a man’s ego by showing how much you respect him is exactly what our men feed on. Women need to hear their loved and men need to feel that they’re respected.
F that.
Respect is earned
@@kkc6155well you have to start out with respect, you have to start somewhere, that’s kind of a crappy attitude, If you are in any kind of relationship, you should treat each other with respect. What if you were trying to to let him know what you need, and he shot back with, that is earned
Women need respect too. WtF?! & men need to feel loved too.
1. Stand your feminine ground.
2. Create invitations instead of directives.
3. Hero-size him, instead of criticize.
Another great video! Thanks for the reminders.
Oij
Oh lord. Where are pearls an cardigans. Meet your man at door with a martini
Oh no…I am so #2!! This explains a lot. Matt Boggs, is it too late to change the balance in a 2 year relationship?
@Monica Duquette Never too late!
Bonus Tip #4: Generously make love to him on his command. He will be far less likely to cheat, and if he still does, he will do it less.
@@monicaduquette8453 and don’t forget #5
Your man is never, ever wrong remind him often that so his masculine energy you were unable to make decisions, hold down a job, pick out a restaurant
My husband is the hero of my story. He isn’t very tall, and he’s soft spoken. But height and booming voice aren’t what make a man manly. He’s very capable, he’s so smart, he’s there for me when I’m having trouble and need a hug. He’s quiet and never needs to brag, because he has so much self confidence that he doesn’t need to tell others how awesome he is.
I am so glad I watched this video because I have noticed that when I stop demanding and start asking, offering, he responds much more positively. I’ll do this more often.
My mother emasculated my father by putting him down, mocking him, making him feel stupid and small. It made all of us kids treat him similarly. And I always felt terrible about that when I got to know him better as an adult and realized that he wasn’t stupid, that he was just lacking in self esteem from being pushed around by a wife who didn’t appreciate all of the great things that he did. I don’t want to be that way with my own husband. I want to build him up so that he feels good around me and acts in kind. ❤️
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💖 Beautiful and rare how kind you are and that you did not have to follow the destructive mindset of the rest of your family! You are a light✨
This is so beautiful!! I love how you're able to see what your mom did and how damaging that is and do the complete opposite to your husband! My sister in law criticizes my brother and puts him down and this is in front of the family I can only Imagine how she treats him behind closed doors on a daily basis. It makes me so sad how backwards relationships can be. The right kind of insight and compassion and capacity to grow is what we all need. Love your comment. Your husband is lucky to have you,😘
Yes absolutely! My husband now is the manliest man but he isn't as tall or big as last husband or others I dated but they where all jerks who thought way too much of themselves without being any of it. My husband now is so amazing in everyway and I love and respect him so much. He makes me feel safe loved and cared for. He is such a great husband and he is truly my best friend. I hope everyone has that in thier life. I've always been very feminine and I'm retired military and know men very well years of working with all kinds and ages and learned a lot. I'm also not impressed by lots of men and many who are very handsome and other things most women look for turn out to be worst and think they can just get any woman and arrogant. I think I got the best one and feel so fortunate especially after my exhusband and that experience. We both came to table with a lot to offer and did things completely differently than I ever had. I took things slow and didn't get physical for long time and built it up and laid a great foundation in process and learned a lot. It also had an effect of making him only want and think of me when all these other beautiful women where throwing themselves at him. He would drop anything for me and even knowing that even if I stayed with him didn't mean he was getting anything when others where definitely going to, he chose me . He is the most trustworthy and honest person I've met and has good heart but definitely manly in everyway. It's not about just being submissive it's just being in your natural softer feminine energy and think lots of women are turned off thinking they have to pretend to be something not or too giving to man. There is also balance because men also like to see your Fiesty side without being a target of you being overly masculine. He didn't see my really loving softer side till I decided he was one. Now he will call me out when I'm being too aggressive or masculine lol but in playful way but enough to know that obviously I'm having trouble and it may be something external causing it. Not having my father around growing up I didn't see dynamics of marriage relationship and had to build my own.
happy for you but i could never be w a dwarf
I’ve been married almost 37 years. Back when I met my husband in a bar and he asked me for my number, cell phones didn’t exist. I smiled and said “I’m in the book” and walked away. He found me in the phone book and called me a couple days later. The rest is history😊
Sounds so mysterious. I’m glad you found the one.
Nowadays he would be labeled a creep!
You must've told him you full name. Not really the smartest thing for women.
How did he found you? Am curious 😅
@@Amy_Stanmore He knew my brother so he already knew my last name. We’ve been together almost 40 years so I’d say it worked out!😉
Being a very feminine woman I was always drawn to very masculine men. I got my soulmate for 33 years, my love, a huge rugby playing, country sports loving man. 6' 3 to my 4' 11. I felt treasured and loved always. I miss him so very much. He told me every day he loved me very much and loved being with me. How lucky was I to be married to this wonderful man. Great advice on this video.
You were very lucky. To have a beautiful love is a dream in everyone’s life. Stay strong.
Can you tell me what makes you feminine. Like what are some if your qualities?
My husband has many health concerns. I tell him how brave he is for dealing with what life has handed him, how proud I am of him, and that I love him. It makes him not feel so negative but helps him see his strength in dealing with it.
And he does have courage where courage is most needed. My husband was always my hero but never more that when is was ill and dying. I so hope I can be as good as him.
I'm enjoying this so much. Everything he's saying is on the mark. I grew up the daughter of an NHRA champion drag racer. At age 5 I was gapping spark plugs. By the age of ten I was breaking down and rebuilding engines with my Dad. I'm very feminine, nothing masculine about me, but the fact I happen to know more about cars than the men I've dated lol. Except my late husband. He found this sexy. Because he was a car guy. He loved to listen to me talk all his car guys under the table. Talk about my first car, a 1970 Chevelle SS, 396 4 speed Posi rear-end lol. He loved it after I ran my Dads dragster down the quarter mile and took off my helmet letting my long hair fall down my back. Now this right here is a confident man who supported everything I wanted to do. I'm a tiny girl and he was this big handsome tall guy who worked on one of those big oil rigs in the middle of the ocean in California. I miss him so much. I wish all you single ladies are able to find your dream guy. I found mine, I miss him everyday.
God Bless
Your story is adorable, it’s almost like a Disney movie.
@@zsrz4877 Thank You, I feel so blessed to have had the most wonderful Dad along with my husband, the Love of my life. My Dad always called my husband son. They had such a great bond. My husband said it was because of how much they loved me. That alone still leaves me a bit speechless.
God Bless
Can fell the love you had for this man. So special. Makes me miss my "teddy bear too. 25 years on I still miss my late hubby and best friend. Lost our only child 5 years ago. Life has been full of tragedy but those 2 men adored me. Its great to be so loved.
@@kristasmith8934 so sweet and I'm sorry you lost him. Your story reminds me of that song from The King And I - "Hello Young Lovers". You had the best ❤
@@rosiebottom3870 Thank You so much. He really was the best. He didn't have to say much, the way he looked at me was a billion I Love You's. I would catch him just watching me with that spark in his eyes. It's a love that you can't move on from when there's a loss. You cherish it always, it's your treasure and you know nothing else out there can compare.
God Bless
I know this sounds manipulative but most people don't like you, they just like the way you make them feel. I truly believe this. Once I've realised this, I've become so much more successful in life and career. People aren't difficult to please😊
this is true in very basic and surface level relationships. this is not love. when you love somebody, you love them for who they are, not for how they make you feel.
I agree with nukacloud as to some people. However, both in friendship and a romantic relationship isn't it always better to be positive? Why would we want to make somebody feel like crap. As you get to know another person, then you see that it is a mutually beneficial relationship. If it isn't...and someone is using you let them go. And NEVER become involved jus for what people can do for you. We can use little ways to even make random strangers feel good. If you are telling truth it is not manipulative! Walk up to somebody say wow your outfit is amazing. Or you are wonderful with your makeup...your eyeliner is fab.
As long as you don't fall into hypocrisy
I usually trust people who make me uncomfortable with their honesty. Manipulative people tend to be rly attractive so that is one thing I have learned.
I've heard this as well and 100% believe it!
This makes so much sense. I'm super feminine, but my husband didn't have the masculine energy I was attracted to. I felt like I kept having to be the man in the relationship, making me deeply unhappy. When I met a masculine man after my husband and I broke up, and saw how he reacted to my femininity, I felt a million times better and like I could be myself around him. It was such a good feeling!
I understand completely. I got so tired of him being in his feminine energy ALL THE TIME, and didn't want to feel like I had to carry both the masculine and feminine energies & roles. When I first dated a few very masculine men, it was both such a relief and pleasure to feel like I could relax, but was also so much of a turn on.
@@hiannahgus574 🎃
My husband oscillates between feminine and masculine energy…I do also, and it can be very off-putting and confusing for us. I’ve personally felt really weird about it for years.
Yes. I have made the mistake of picking men who do not have masculine energy OR I have been taught (through the feminist movement) that I have to act like a man, be driven and focused, and be in charge which resulted in feminine men being attracted to me. Either way, it has not worked. I got tired of being the man while looking at my man who was afraid to be in charge. So now, I am diligently working on tapping into my feminine energy and also presenting myself much more femininely. It is late in my life but better late than never.
Good job!!
To all the fathers out there: Take care of your daughters so that she will learn to lean back and be in her female energy.
so right - when a man treats his wife & daughters with love, kindness, protection & great manners, the daughters will grow up knowing that's how men should treat them. be that guy who she'll compare everyone to. she won't be picking losers.
I picked losers. Dad abandoned me growing up. 😅
YES!
Woman stop asking men to do anything . Be that woman he stays or don’t at your own risk. If your here that’s because you know your lacking
Exactly..but modern fathers, without sons, tend to push girls into masculine energy
I did all those things. He's just using me for a place to live. This doesn't work with men who don't care about you or is out to hurt you
Nope, I agree with you. Wouldn't matter how or who you are to some men (or some women). Some are just manipulative a holes, just out to use and abuse. Guess I need to meet some nicer people?!
I have always said the way you keep a partner happy is to treat them like a king/queen, pamper them, nurture them, and at the same time let them know if they treat you badly, you’ll kick him to the curb in a heartbeat. People are quickly bored by a “doormat”. Shifting from the feminine power to the masculine, when necessary, is important. I am a female who has more masculine energy, and my husband has even more masculine energy. I never ever treat my husband like my employee, I treat him like a king. But there is a line, and if he crosses it, I let him know and push back hard. He finds that irresistible.
I agree. With a spoiled man you cant be too nice
In what ways do you push back? What techniques do you apply?
Ladies free yourself from getting lost in these types of relationship rules. Do not get lost in playing games. There are good men for everyone and if you want one that fits you, BE YOU! Not every man is a risk taker. In order for a man to feel his masculinity he needs to have it to begin with, and each man is an individual in how he gains his confidence so support him to be all he can be. He was initially attracted to you for a reason and you to him, trust in this. Listen with an open heart, communicate with honesty and always, always respect one another's space.
At least one normal comment! Thank God! Be happy and deliver your message to every person you meet🙏
I agree. Thankyou for your comment.
It's good to learn how men work in their masculine self. Too many women castrate men without even know what they are doing. This is something that is rarely talked about or learned. It's important to know this as it can pull you in a space of better understanding of how your man works. I get what you're saying, don't play games, but do try to understand a man's masculinity and how your femininity works.
@@Ericatrue2.0 Thankyou for that better understanding...
AGREED
I've used the Hero tool. It's powerful. I asked my man to fix my bicycle for me. When he was done I said, "you are my hero you just fixed my bike and provided me with so much joy because I can ride my bike now." When I said, "you're my hero" I saw his chest puff out and his arms raise like he was super man. He had the biggest smile on his face. It was awsome!!! Yes ladies let's "Hero Size Him not Criticize Him"
I had similar experience with my bf. He's never picky about food and never cares about wine and gourmet and all that things. And I'm a fantastic cook and growing up in a culture that food is 80% of life. So every time he asked me to pick restaurants because I'm picky and know what kind of restaurants have good food. But the thing is, I naturally dislike making decisions on where to go or do on a date. So last Valentine, I insisted on him picking the restaurant, which made him anxious at the beginning because he worried he would ruin the night. But he picked an amazing Italian place that surprised me and himself. That's one of the most impressive date night we had. Now he fell in love with making dining decisions and each of our dates are getting better ♥
That's awesome! I also hate making decisions and love when the man makes the plans.
Great story! Thanks for sharing ❤️
Yeah I be suggesting 3 places and he'd pick the one. Seems to go well though.
@@sallylemon5835 good idea for picky plp like me hahah
Oh boi
I think men want to be appreciated for what they do for women. Never forget to appreciate
I run my life, it doesn't run me and sometimes it's so easy to slip into masculine energy! My husband is a big burly man with grizzly bear tendencies that can definitely handle me... but what you said still resounds. He LOVEs to please me and giving him that space instead of directing him into that space makes things even more amazing!! Thanks for the great tips!
I have a guy friend who I’m kinda starting to develop feelings for. We hung out at his place last week. I’ve been single since preschool, and because I’ve had to do so much on my own for myself, I was so used to leading with masculine energy. I’m also a creative and love to build and plan and create. But I’ve been learning from watching relationship videos like this how to lean into my feminine energy when I’m around guys.
Anyway, I was helping him transplant plants in his garden. It was already getting to be early evening, and all I had eaten that day was a handful of almonds and the keto equivalent of a candy bar. So I was kinda getting a little hungry. Perhaps a year ago I would have kept my mouth shut and suffered through the evening without saying anything, and grabbed something on my way home. But this time around I actually decided to voice what I was feeling, and do it in a way that wasn’t pushy, but still clear. After the second re-stating of my desire for food, he took me back inside and made me an amazing spread of food, and we talked the entire time he was cooking. I’m really grateful to have him in my life, and he’s teaching me what it looks and feels like to be cared for.
That's so lovely 🥰
I ship it
That's kool!
Hopefully your relationship develops into something more! 🤞🤞
Awww this is so sweet! You two have something so special. Rooting for you two! Let us romantics in the comments know how it goes!! 😊💗
I literally wish I had seen this video in my 20s it would have saved me so much time and heartache from failed relationships not knowing how to deal with men and their different needs. I Didn’t have a father growing up so I very much learned to be more aggressive and in my masculine energy. It’s so amazing that you’re teaching this to clueless women like me.
So true, if women grow up without a father or brothers, we don't really understand masculinity that well, and we do develop that masculine energy of our own. For sure this has been true for me. I'm still struggling to find a better balance because I have realized men feel intimidated by my personality, and I don't want that.
You're not clueless. You've adapted ~ now go teach
@@kimgordon3695 ♥️true indeed. Thank you sis🙏🏾
I can definitely relate to your story too!!
You are not alone
I had a guy offer me two choices on our first date after I told him i ate vegetarian. It was thoughtful and masculine and not pushy. I let him pick, but I liked he gave me the choice.
Hi 😍😍❤❤🌷
What? Long gone are the days when men should be choosing what women eat when they take them to dinner. This is NOT a sign of chivalry. A man picking your date’s food for them is a red flag and a sign of a controlling misogynist.
Also, most of this man’s blather is just that, blather. Just love, praise and talk to one another like human beings.
Happily married for 37 years
I did those 3 tips without knowing that and he once said “ wow with you I can feel myself more like a man and it reflects on how you’re beautiful lady and that’s rare “♥️
😍❤❤🌷🌷
Miranda, I'm all in for that way of dealing with the masculine and feminine. But, can you tell me, how do you go about the fact when he choses the wrong venture, (bad food, bad surroundings, not your taste, etc..), or when he isn't from that place, and doesn't know the language or habits??? Thanks for any helpful advice. 🙏
I'm in trouble! I am attracted to very masculine men but I am a strong woman who gives off masculinity because I've had to protect myself against men. I look feminine, dress feminine and am feminine but with men I tend to show more of my masculinity. I think it's a subconscious way to ward them off as self protection.
I soften my voice when I go into my masculine energy when I have to set a respectful boundary. It helps to to invite him into a conversational tone where I can help him see where he is being stronger than necessary. It helps him to see he is still the confident man who is providing solutions in our relationship with my input.
I legit followed through all three steps yesterday with a guy, it was new for me to do and not take charge (lean into my feminine energy), and he sounded so pleased and motivated in his plans for us to go out and hang out. This is someone I do not want to lose as we finally have our timing right later in life to come together, and Im not gonna do my old habits that didn't attract the masculine man I wanted.
Matt Boggs.... YOU THE MAN!!! I have been watching you for over two years, just when I started dating, now my husband. You were so helpful and now that we have been married for more than a year, I check in with you often, to make sure I am reminded and staying on course with my feminine side. Thank you for being so helpful. My life has improved so much through your behavior teachings, thank you!
When we are out and he ask what I want to drink... I look into his eyes and sweetly say "May I please have a glass of wine and a soft kiss?" He melts, and it lets me relax and be feminine and lets him know that I am giving him the gift to be masculine and lead strong, and I say "Thank you Love"
Wow, that's so romantic and inspiring, thanks!
Beautiful!
So adorable 😍
🤮
@@bubb5225 🤣🤣
A few weeks ago I texted my person of interest, asking to toot a tune on his sax while I would undergo a medical procedure. He gladly responded and requested that I keep him posted. I texted that I felt mellow and smiled during the procedure and asked what he played. He sent me a beautiful jazz rendition of "Peace". I responded that this rare gem transported me serenely way beyond the moon. He texted me a lovely heart emoji. This is from a man who makes sure that he remain stoic, not showing his feelings. Not this time...
"Person of Interest." 😂
❤
Thank you, Matt. I wasn’t aware of the concept of the masculine vs feminine energy. I saw this about 8 months ago and did a lot of housework on it. I reacquainted myself with my feminine side and it absolutely changed everything. I’m happier now. And the best part… yes, I finally found my man. He is absolutely everything I was hoping for in a relationship. Thank you for helping me figure out this part of my life. Love to you and your team and family.
1) stand your feminine ground (not defined here) 2) create invitations not directives (make requests/suggestions) 3) praise for achievement/attainment
How to increase your feminine energy? Dress like a lady (not a tramp), walk like a lady, sit like a lady, wait for him to open doors for you and thank him when he does, take his arm when crossing the street.... BE a lady and he will be more masculine. Wearing ratty t-shirts, jeans with holes in them and flip flops is not going to ignite his masculinity. BE a lady and BE feminine by using perfume, doing your makeup and hair, having manners, not swearing - and asking his opinion. Why did men feel masculine around Marillyn Monroe, Betty Grable, Elizabeth Taylor? Those 1940's and 1950's woman wore dresses and were feminine in ways we've forgotten! We could learn from emulating them.
Nah. Nothing wrong with t-shirts and jeans, especially when dresses are either too cold or dressing up too much. Men don't want a high maintence doll, either. Many women, like myself, are allergic to makeups and perfumes so we can't wear them. If a guy needs me to be a stereotype and uncomfortable in my own skin, he needs therapy, not a relationship.
So true,elegantly explained.Love this thought 💭
Well, the 1940s and 1950s ladies didn’t have a choice. They had to look/dress really, really well, because they had to hook rich men for marriage or else it’s penny pinching for them the rest of their lives with limited career paths. It was survival for them to catch rich men.
Agreed minus the clothing part. Dresses, bright colors, heels are cute but femininity is much more and goes much deeper than the clothing girls wear. Whatever you wear needs to make you feel good and sexy and if thats in jeans i say go for it! Its energy not material clothing.
Those ladies weee groomed and serialized as children 🤦🏼♀️ they were also thirsty for men attention.
Hi Mat, Ive been happily married for 23 years- married since 18 and he was 21.....So I speak from experience when I say your advise is on the mark! I listen to you cuz everything you talk about are things I believe from experience are true This is something I've always believed that a man you love should be treated like a king and he in return will treat me like a queen . It's a mutual dance ! My man is very masculine I am very feminine - after 23 years and 6 kids we are still wildly attracted to eachother not just physically but emotionally ! Everything you say about hero-sizing him is true and he loves how I let him lead and he spoils me with his sweetness and love . You rune a great channel and I'm sure you help a lot of people have healthy well balanced relationships :-) Best of luck !
WOW you guys are SO LUCKY!
I LOVE THAT ❤️
@@SirenaSpades Because you never stop learning!
Please will you give us more examples of being on feminine. The more the better! Id love to learn to be feminine
Sounds like us! 23 years and 9 kids. I think having a lot of kids has forced me to be more feminine because motherhood is very feminine.
3 Feminine Qualities that the Masculine energy finds highly Attractive:
4:08 Stand your feminine Ground (1)
4:40 Example of this
7:17 Create invitations instead of directives (2)
(making requests)
8:00 Example of this
9:59 "Hero-Size" him, instead of criticizing him (3)
(Appreciate him, celebrate him)
Thanks my time is so limited and this helped me get the info in the time I had! really appreciate that.
Thanks…this guy has to get to the point.
@@SmoBoo A little early to reply... I know... 😂 Thank you so much guys
Thanks
Some men don't want to lead this way or they want the female to take charge sometimes. I suggest things I'd like to do and they don't happen.
I love the way you speak about “masculine energy “ and “feminine energy “ rather than men and women because we are all made up of both regardless of our actual gender. This is something that many influencers don’t acknowledge. Good on you!
Such valuable information Matt! I have found that letting a man know that you value him, his efforts, the big & little things he does for you is so important. Yesterday the man i am dating made a simple but wonderful lunch for the two of us. I loved that he did that without really even asking what do you want to eat. He just planned it & did it. I was so freeing for me. I am usually the one making all the decisions and the executing the ideas. its so nice to have someone else do that for me. ❤
Wow! I have lived for so long in masculine energy.. I had to take care of myself I grew up that way so this will be a challenge but I'm up for it!
Same here, but like you said, I'm up for the challenge as well!
Or u marriad ??
👧😍❤🌷
@@ImranKhan-tj3dr nope
@@RelentlesslyBecoming Ooh really far for me
I love ❤❤love 😍😍love 🌷🌷so so much really I like u I want to meet you I m intrested with u S eriousely 💑💑💝💝🌹🌹
same here.
I was meeting this guy who I've been dating for dinner. As I was walking from the parking lot to the restaurant, he was also walking towards the restaurant. Instead of walking towards him, I stopped and waited for him so we could walk together. I could've easily walked to him, but I made him come to where I am, increasing my feminine and his masculine energy.
After more than four decades of marriage, I tell him how he has always been attractive to me, from the first time I met him till today. When we looked at a picture of our family a couple days ago I pointed to him and said, look at how incredibly handsome you are. My husband is a fabulous cook. Whenever he makes something I act like I’m eating something very delicious and tell him what a great cook is and how lucky I am. Like you said, it’s about focusing on the good things he has and not on things he does not have. Also, whatever you say has to be true. A smart man will dislike a phony compliment.
Good word.
I am fortunate to have a husband who is confident in his gorgeous masculinity. He is a kick ass father, too. I can be a bit dominant, but over 40 years together, I have learned when I can lean into my feminine energy and when to lean into his masculine amazing self. We have a wonderful dynamic that continues to uplift both of us.
Yeah, making him a hero is all fine. After 20 years of always praising and making him the hero… it would be great to receive a little bit of that in return. At least a small bit of recognition for the multitude of things that I do would be really nice. He doesn’t criticize but he doesn’t offer any recognition, acknowledgment, or appreciation in return. Guess what has happened … making him a hero has stopped. When he feeds the dogs I thank him and tell him I appreciate it. Do I get that back? No. I’m done with making him my hero.
Great advice. I’ve also found that men subconsciously respond to seeing unabashed admiration shine in a woman’s eyes, because that admiration is an unprotected, vulnerable invitation into a woman’s heart and thoughts.
That’s what I have found to be the main thing men want, admiration. Love the hero-cise concept 👍🏼
Saying that I trust his judgement...has shown to be the rigtig words in many situatiations..just lige you described..his chest pumpts up and he walks like je owns the street 😄
I also admire men as absolutely amazing creatures but it's never gotten me anywhere. Their response usually is "you're right! I am amazing!😊
That is so beautifully put. It's so true, a good man loves this and responds by loving and cherishing his special lady.
I know as a woman that I have had to always lead it seems. I have found someone who leads. It is such a breath of fresh air. All I have to do is just by being myself create this wonderful relationship. Thank you so much Mat for sharing this insight. I have actually said "You are the best at being my man" He was blown away!!!
Aaaww
I never found a man that leads. It sucks. I’m not wasting my time and effort on a man child
I feel the other way around 😂😂😂 be careful with all the hero stuff when he catches wings he might use it against you.
So true. Last time a man took care of me choosing places and food, and when he saw I am genuinely happy from his choice, he was soo happy too! And wanted to give even more🥰
Great insight! So many of us were raised by single/divorced Moms who had to be strong so we didn't learn the feminine/masculine balance. Thank you for sharing this!
I'm really into praising my husband of 39 years, I loved to hug him and tell him he's a hard worker and great cook. I love to see him smile and yes, his chest kinda puffs up. Great video!!!
Twice in the past three months I have found two different men who were extremely similar. They both had all of the qualities I was looking for, except for the fact that they were both emotionally unavailable. It’s just validation for me that the universe has my back and is letting me know that the man who IS emotionally available and has all these other qualities is out there, and he’s waiting for me too
What does it mean that he is not emotionally available?
FINALLY SOMEONE EXPLAINED!!!! I tolld my man this: " a woman in me loves a man in you. And a man in me is in love with a woman in you".......now i hear this publicly...woow, fantastic!!!! Its the deepest truth, and helps a lot. All people should understand this!!!!! Man, you are fantastic, helpful and soo motivational, inspirational. Simply loooooove listening to you👏❤️❤️❤️❤️
This is really good for us women that are used to doing for ourselves but want to get back in the dating world... This was really helpful for me. Thank you
I appreciate that you said nothing about hair flipping or neck exposure! 👏❤ This was fantastic!
A strong feminine in any person is ACTIVELY RECEPTIVE. It says, " I know who I am and there is room for you." The passive person who says "I don't know what I want, you choose" or the dominating person who says "I get to decide everything" is not someone in balance or mature. The passive model is what most people still mistakenly think of as "feminine" and many men like "feminine" women in this mode of submission. An immature man who needs a pat on the head for everything is also not someone with a strong center.
I practice saying "how gentlemanly of you" (little house on the prairie miss ingalls) to any man that opens the door for me, lets me go first through a doorway, praise their appearance: what a great looking shirt! etc. Guys will start to chat and small talk after that.
I’ve always been myself and I give off very feminine energy !!!! I am a woman of 55 yrs old I’ve always been told they’ve never met a woman quite like me. You have to let them kinda think they’re “the man” and follow their lead. They love that, you can plant the seed and it will grow into his idea…….anyone else like this? Just be yourself if you’re soft feminine and if hard try being a little more soft ad let him take the reign!!! Sit back ad enjoy your man Just my own thoughts
Words of affirmation and showing respect too. When he does a project - admire how great it looks and how much better the new (sink, wall, countertop, floor, anything) looks and will be for the future.
This is amazing advice! I’ve been happily married for over 25 years and have a great husband. I’ve been waking up to how incredibly lucky I am. I want to double down on making my man happy. This will be put to use!
Yes! Thank you! Standing your feminine ground is a great idea. No one talks about this concept enough.
Whew! I must say it's definitely a job when you have to help create the masculine energy opposed to him already having this trait.
We were having issues bc of my masculine energy. I never ask him for favors or even money...after so many things happened I realized that I need to show more feminine energy. I've started telling him what I want and what I don't like. I think the turning point was...I always win in arguments and even though he knows that he is wrong, he just wants to win once lol I let him win and well he start listening better now. It's always him being so against me on everything. So I learn that for him sometimes even if I feel my idea is better let him lead too. After that he leads and listen to me better now because he no longer feel so against me lol
I asked my new husband for an allowance. He seems ok with it!
@@Nina-hk7ub yes do ask bc he will be happy to give you money. It will help build a bond between you two. Him investing in you will make him value you more. Men wants to be provider so it help his ego too. Back then I was way too independent...and learned the hard way. Now I ask him for money and he says yes most of the time unless he was really short then it'll be on the next paycheck. Saying thank you made him feel very appreciated 😊 truth is a man that loves you will be willing to spend on you as long as it makes you happy. Just say thank you and give him your brightest smile 😁
I thought men don't like women who ask for help
@@Nina-hk7ub JFC!
Married t0 years! The best advice I got in finding a husband was to marry someone who loves you more than you love them!
I subscribed just because you made me laugh out loud. You made my day happier. I will never see breadsticks the same.
Yes it's ok...obviously within reason and depending on how long you have been together... because asking straight out the gate, he's going to run!
This is wonderful!
I find that when I truly put myself first and take good care of myself. My feminine energy comes out a lot more. I wear more dresses and a bit of makeup. He loves it…
And so do I!
Thank you!
I loved the story of how your wife handled your first date together! That was such a good and helpful example of your first point!
I’ve been in my marriage 20 years now and these are some fabulous tips💯 I need to be more mindful of how & what I say to my husband💛
If you have been married for 20 yrs unless you both are miserable. You must already be doing something right
I agree, I definitely need to be kinder & gentler with my husband
I love how you use examples from your own relationship Matt...so helpful.
I'm so happy having my ex fiance back , after being separated for 4 months . All thanks to Mr God's sent. who help me to get back my ex again , I will suggest y'all get help from him and it works within 3days
This has been hard for me at time. I raised both my kids on my own and so I have had to do everything and used to doing well.. Everything. I have had to play this masculine role that I don't want play but its hard to let the guy plan, pay, do things...
I'm so happy having my ex fiance back , after being separated for 4 months . All thanks to Mr God's sent. who help me to get back my ex again , I will suggest y'all get help from him and it works within 3days
I found this intensely moving for some reason. Our souls recognise truth.
The 3rd point definitely works both ways for both the man and the woman.
Everything you have said makes total sense. I apparently did most things wrong during my 30 year marriage with my late hubby. Wish I had seen this video then.
I love that you talk about the masc and fem energies! Not many men do and I am on a spiritual TF journey with my DM and this is very appropriate! Thank you! I learned to switch more into my feminine energy of flow, and let him come to me, to take the pressure off energetically! We are a long distance and kind of in separation but I can feel him coming closer, now that I've balanced my energy and letting him take the lead when he's ready :)
I’m not sure why I’m posting this but I just have to say I’m torn on this… I get what you’re saying and I really appreciate the insight… It’s important for men to feel they’re doing things right… It’s also important for women to feel that way… I completely agree that nitpicking and negativity are A total turn off and no one likes them… But if I am stepping up to help someone who can’t figure out where to go for dinner, in my mind I’m being polite, and what you’re saying is I am emasculating him… Maybe not overtly… So all this time when I’m trying to be polite and help solve problems what you’re saying is that’s the reason men pull back is they feel incompetent… I guess maybe the truth hurts… ouch sorry that was harsh…
I appreciate your point And I am guessing I’m not the only one who did not know… I like the way you presented tue situation because what you suggest is really not hard to do… I had one boyfriend that I used to let order for me… And it made him feel like a hero… it works situationally… But I don’t think it’s some thing that will actually over come someones full insecurity.
This is such a great video and easy to understand. I love my husband so much and find that I sometimes already do these things. I grew up with an abusive father and my mom was a homemaker and felt unable to support my sister and I on her own. She felt stuck in an abusive marriage. My mother instilled in my sister and I to go to college, to earn money, to be independent. Luckily, I found a great man when I was in college, have since graduated, and am in a great career. My now husband and I have been together for eighteen years. I still have times where I'm afraid to feel controlled but trust him to also make decisions. Thank you for sharing this video. 💕
It wasn’t easy for your mom. Her advice was perfect. Congratulations
The key here is the man has to be confident. He would take advantage of a women who gives her “feminine energy “ to him. Example a narcissistic man.
Though 89 and Married for soon to be 50 years now…I’ll tell YOU the TRUTH Young Man…You Hit on some very IMPORTANT and Vita Points…❤❤❤❤
You are truly one of the very BEST "Therapists" I have ever heard! I do LOVE so much of what you say & a realize so much of how I do so many things wrong! Your wife is a Lucky SMART WOMAN!!
Thanks for the tips. To answer your questions, one thing that def. works when I don't want to argue about something that is not important, esp. if winning the argument means I lose romantic ground, I don't argue facts. I tell the truth differently by paraphrasing what he said so he knows he has been heard, and then I say, "but something about that doesn't feel right." Then after he repeats his point with zeal, I say again, "I understand what you are saying, but, well, something about that just doesn't feel right to me." Last time I did that the guy said, mostly to himself, "so something there doesn't feel right . . . " after which he promptly changed the subject and we moved on.
I'm so happy having my ex fiance back , after being separated for 4 months . All thanks to Mr God's sent. who help me to get back my ex again , I will suggest y'all get help from him and it works within 3days
This was such good points. I’m very assertive and such, but I’ve learned that taking over and saving people weakens them unknowingly. It was hard at first, but I’ve come to the conclusion that having primarily feminine energy doesn’t make you any less powerful/assertive (weak or small), but it allows different opportunities that having only one set of energy does not. Empowering people is always best for everyone.
Or u marriad
😍😍❤
That is such good insight!
So true. I do this a lot and especially men tend to dislike it. If I give them advice or information to better their lives it makes them feel weaker and more defensive. One thing is them asking for it and another is giving it when you think you should.
So right about the masculine/feminine energy. I see all of these long marriages where two people just are with each other. The female decided early on that he was not doing what she thought he should, so she took over. It destroys the balance long term and also affects the children.
Yep. That’s what happened in my marriage and I regret it. 23 years married and 14 years divorced and now I want him back. 😢
Tips start at 4:07. ☺️ I love these! Great job and thank you. I struggle with these cuz I “do it all”, but recently due to an injury have needed to ask for help. I love appreciating the great jobs men are doing. It feels good to me too to “hero-size” them. I started practicing in my mind saying, “I would love if you…” for my someday future man. ❤️
Interesting. I am both fascinated by these techniques, and at the same time exhausted at the notion. There's something contradictory about having to manipulate (or trick) your man into using his masculine energy as if he has no control of his own. The fact that the woman needs to make that happen is the opposite of what I think of when I think of masculine. In a sense the woman is STILL using her masculine energy to pretend to be feminine in order to get the man to be masculine. Hilarious and ironic. There's also something maternal about it and, of course, that's not sexy. I'm not criticizing mind you, just exploring your concepts further precisely because they are thought provoking.
Well said. Not many people see this. Interestingly, you go apologetic at the end, explaining the obvious 😊
Yes, exhausted. My mother was the master at bringing out the masculine, but I saw it merely as manipulation. She taught me these things as well and while I've never had a shortage of interested men, there are very few I am interested in. I'd rather have an intellectual equal over batting my eyes and pretending I'm incompetent. Now, I am only speaking for myself here, some women are very comfortable in this way, I just personally am not.
Value verbally his ideas Been married 52 years. I’m a feminine know it all. It was one hard lesson to master letting go of my opinion and allowing his to stand. Like magic it caused good compromise
LOVE this so much. ❤️
My masculine energy has always been more dominant. I am very independent and go after everything I want and really make things happen for me, so I have always approached everything with that same energy. Now I understand why some things didn't work out in the past when it comes to the opposite sex.
Really going to try to increase my feminine energy and use this approach from now on. Thank you for this amazing insight. ☺️👌🏻💯🤗
Masculine Energy (Confident, Calm, Steady, Show of responsibility - the caring role, taking the leading front role etc etc)
Same here!
This is a huge problem with women today.
The best thing about this video is recognising men and women. And no surprise we are made different. Thank the Lord.
Intellect, confidence, positive, energy, and curiosity
I love these tips and they are so easy to follow. Moreover, your concrete examples do help sooo much!
Part of the issue for me is that while I would love to have a man that is a go-getter and provider I always seem to end up with the extreme end of that. Controlling, Possessive, and Stubborn men who call themselves "alpha males" I tend to be very feminine in relationships and don't mind compromising and giving a little wiggle room and this has just attracted men who completely bulldoze my feelings, wants and needs. I'm always expected to do all the compromising so that they are happy. I just end up lonely, frustrated, and trying to fit my personality and feelings into a box to please him. I've been separated now for a year after a 10 year long marriage and am working on building up healthy boundaries while raising my kids and starting a new career. I don't know when I'll be ready for another relationship, if ever but I don't seem to attract anyone other than jerks because of my feminine nature.
I'm curious if you've looked into attachment styles or if you have some unresolved childhood trauma. Those two things have a lot to do with what we attract and who we're attracted to. My friend pointed out that I attract very needy, immature, profoundly conflicted guys. In any case, I wish you well in your healing!
@@chriskiesling9387
But even if one does find an unresolved trauma, or childhood event, we can't always know how to change the attraction we have, rooted deep down... I don't think all comes down only to attraction. There are higher amounts of unavailable men, in the world, than available ones. That's a fact. Women have to do both roles, most of the time. Another fact! This is mostly due to the decades before, I won't go into that. But, instead of always blaming attraction laws etc, one must take into account more factors one has no hand upon!! Afcourse, the mind can direct many things, but not all!
Shannon, same here... So frustrating. I've been through decades of hardships and heartbreaks. It sucks big time. No childhood trauma, or so.
I noticed that being a giver, by nature deep down, (and I love to give), makes certain people being attracted to me. Even without them knowing. They just feel it. That's the core of a person. Either you're a giver or a taker. In your core. Afcourse, afterwards one tries to balance that out. But, I'm talking about the core. Givers are much rarer than takers, at the moment, too. So there is an unbalance. One doesn't have everything in one's hand. There's only so much one can do, the rest is up to the Universe! Grounding and feeling good inside is key to a happier life. Give to yourself, and try and be more selective and assertive, maybe that can help? Take care. 🤗
A lot of men (not real men, with the right Masculine energy) nowadays interpret those feminine actions as weak, indecisive, and too kind. Thus, these women tend to be manipulated, badly treated and are unsatisfied. It's really very frequent to see that. Society has changed genders a lot... 😓 And the mix of cultures, religion, etc.., makes things even more difficult.
Interesting, but way more challenging than before.
@Ambriel Apps It’s not that masculine men view a woman’s femininity as “weak, indecisive, and too kind”. It’s that their desires make no logical sense, and that the situation must be clamped down on with decisiveness. Masculine men want a very submissive, kind woman; it’s that their women too often want to be irresponsible with spending, can’t stop using social media apps that frequently double as hookup apps, don’t want to make love on cue, or want a “girls night out” and therefore be too tempted to get their back blown out by some tall, hot guy looking for random fun. That kind of stuff. Masculine men know this, and they want to prevent it. They don’t have time for games; they’re too busy getting stuff done. If you want more perspective from this end, study the How To Relationship TH-cam channel.
Wow! I’m so happy I found your channel! This is just what I needed! I’ve been doing it all wrong. I am masculine energy and I want masculine energy. I am not attracting masculine energy from a man because I need to recharge my feminine energy. This makes so much sense!!! Thank u!!
I relate..Check out Adrienne Everheart too!🥰
It resounded with me too!! I need to be in charge of my life and career but I LOVE it when my hubs expresses that masculine energy I crave... so I'm taking Mat's tips to heart and it's so interesting how it changes the dynamic!
I m here for love 😍😍❤❤🌷
Yep makes tons of sense. Ever get turned off by a broody, whiney man? I have, it makes my uterus shrivel up lol my ex was like that and I realized I felt like I was dealing with a moody women. So imagine how men feel when we act masculine? Obviously we have to be balanced and some instances require us to dial up one side more than the other, but this has been a learning experience for me.
Me, too. And also, as a single mom of a young man, I can start using the same ideas to help my son grow into his power.
Thank you so much for making this. I’ve learned more from your video than I from anyone anywhere in my whole life. Like please don’t stop making these no one is talking like you. How to be a full woman and make room for a full man and the fact that we have both energies within. I cannot express my gratitude. Truly feel enlightened. ❤❤❤
I love his passion and love for his wife, How he lights up just when talking about the scenerio with his wife.
I enjoyed this video. I am married and I think I live out the more masculine role in my marriage in terms of directing and planning. However, it is good to learn about letting my husband lead b/c I honestly want to see him in that role more. Thank you.
VIDEO STARTS AT 4:08 YOUR WELCOME! 4 minute intro is ridiculous.
Wonderful Matt 👏💎🇮🇪
Thank you.
For me Feminine Energy is
Moments with Silence.
A lower voice to speak more softly.
Let him some space.
Kindness in every action.
I listen more than I speak.
🌟💜🇮🇪
So helpful! Thank you! Love how you explain the masculine/feminine dynamics so clearly and give great examples of how that looks in real life.
Wow! This explains so much and I'm thrilled that I just happened to click on your video. I, like most women, want our men to be MEN- we seek and crave the masculine energy to compliment our feminine energy!
Can’t I just be myself, and he be himself so we know if the attraction is based on truth and not manipulation?
Exactly. I think these men are immature little boys whose egos need constant attention. Good luck ladies with the acting
My daughter is always saying this too! She's 46 and unmarried. I want to say how is not "playing games" or not "manipulating"working for you? When you look for a job you want, do you walk in and say you're looking for a well paying job that you don't have to start at the bottom for, and you don't know anything about the company--you just want a job!!! Everything in life that is worth while, takes preparation and a certain amount of game playing. It's like fishing--you don't just put a plain bare hook in the water! You have to put bait on the hook to lure the fish to bite. None of these ideas are lies, they are just a different way of presenting yourself.
@@dianethompson6804 no this isn’t quite the same thing. I would not want a man in my life who needed constant babying on my part. My brother’s low self esteem means this is how his marriage works
It is just outrageous. The play acting goes way beyond the three points. It means not disagreeing with them most of time and never criticize which means just having to remind them they maybe forgot to do something but I bet they
@@fionad6338 constant babying is another whole different area. Attracting men and in a relationship are two different things. Everyone is on their best behavior while dating. Once you're in a relationship you both reveal your true selves and decide if that is what you want.
@@dianethompson6804 so present this fake persona to attract some guy then move into who you really are.
Hopefully, you are a fully realized adult female who wants a relationship with an adult male who doesn’t need constant adoration. If he needs that he should get a dog
I guarantee women who think this is good advice are in a relationship with immature, insecure men.
Thank you, Mat for such a great video. You did such a good job of explaining the male and female energies. I never thought of them being on opposite ends of a sliding scale.
That little lady of yours is one smart cookie! You are so lucky to have found each other. I wish I could be more like her.
I'm so happy having my ex fiance back , after being separated for 4 months . All thanks to Mr God's sent. who help me to get back my ex again , I will suggest y'all get help from him and it works within 3days
Wh'tsapp him for help* .
Actually, he distinguished between masculine and feminine energies - not to be confused/conflated with male and female (biological sex).
As a mom of 4 adult males (youngest 18 yo) I feel that these principles would be great for ME to use when interacting with my sons. I want to empower them and I celebrate their masculinity; However, after watching this video, I realize that I have disempowered them to a degree with my masculine energy in those years they were under my care.
I am 60 now but I never stop trying to improve myself. I will be using the insight provided in this video towards my sons, as it seems like it would be a good strategy for moms to bring out the best in their sons. Tragically, so many young men have been feminized by our modern culture.
We moms train our sons for their future wives. Then the wives work with our sons to become the best husband for the DIL. My son is teachable and adores his wife. He’s not perfect, but works with her to make their life the best it can be for them.
I completely relate to this. My husband left when our son was 4. I’ve been a single parent, and as such, I’ve been in my masculine energy providing, doing all the decision making, and making all the directives. My son has autism and is 17 now. He’s stopped growing 5’3”, so he’s tiny for a man, and he’s gay. However, he does have a lot of masculine energy. He’s an Aries and would like to be the initiator and driver of things. I really need to be more aware of how my masculine energy is holding him back.
Funny I was thinking similar with my son…….so how does that work with household chores? 😂
I relate to your comment so much.
Good for you!!! Love to see this
Theres something very wrong with a lot of men these days. They just dont want any responsibility. Against this backdrop the relatively smaller number of men that are actually relationship material have so many options that women end up competing for their attention, which makes these women masculine and kills true , lasting attraction and love. I think the real root cause is the relatively small number of non toxic men