I hate how everyone is against OP because it’s not his fault that OP’s ex married the wrong man after the divorce, I would say the ex should stop living in some fantasy that’s not gonna happen. OP’s first mistake was not blocking the ex and OP’s ex should have gone after the bio father for child support.
because everyone is baby rabid brainwashed. a mix of stockholme syndrome and crab in the bucket and dog in manger. parenthood is sh**y. there is plenty of information out there that it is not the fairy tale crapola the media and others use as propaganda. the NO wins. anyone who tries and bully someone into having unwanted kids are the enemy
@@LunaP1sadly this type of person won't. She'll only care and be sorry about what directly affects her. She doesn't even care about how her current actions will affect her children.
So it's okay for the bio dad to decide he doesn't want children, but it's not okay for OP to make the same decision and be responsible about that decision? WTH
I feel so bad for the few friends that I blew off what they told me about exs, because I thought no one could possibly actually say shit like that. then my fiance and I got pregnant, and he dropped the mask that had been hiding the narcissism and I started to get the kinds of comments that I had once blown off as an overdramatic friend lying and blowing things out of proportion. and there doesn't even seem to be mental gymnastics involved, they seriously think they're that right on everything, at all times. literally cannot fathom that their bullshit isn't correct
No, she wants what she has Always wanted. Her and OP to be a family. The whole picture show. OP as hubby and Dad,her as wife and Mom, the house with the dog and both of them raising "their child".
@lindah3803 and to that kind of person "family" means free labor, simply put she wants someone to exploit. Not his kids, not his shit to deal with, her wants are not OPs obligations.
@@kinosaga21 True, it's not his obligation at all. I still think she wants her "picture show". Yes, that gives her the opportunity to use him as she wants.
Pretty disgusting that his family take his ex's side. He didn't want kids and she did. So they weren't compatible and now they want him to break up with his current fiancée? Block them and go NC.
i don’t know why people think the transplant story is fake. imagine my surprise when i found out that my ex-husband is my 2nd cousin. he’s white and i’m black. his great grandmother was my grandfather’s sister. she was a white passing black woman. my paternal grandfather was born in 1899. i found this out in the early 2000’s. i left him due to him being crazy and abusive (now i know why, i swear it’s genetic) and confirmed it with ancestry dna tests with our son recently
Simple. There are folks on Reddit whose sole purpose is to "prove" a story to be fake . Some believe that because an OP "left out something" in the original post,he/she is hiding something. So their story is fake. With a story like this, there's a whole different line up of assumptions/questions. The whole: This story has to be fake. There's no way you didn't feel a familial connection to your spouse. If you look so much like her Dad, you would've gotten tested. Just to make sure. There's no way you wouldn't have told your "wife" before the surgery. People on Reddit forget/don't take into account that the OP has posted their story when their life has just been blown up. Some situations just happened. Others took place very recently. These are people looking for advice,not English/Spelling lessons, be called a lier or insulted and degraded by Reddit. Depending on the situation and the OP just how angry, deceived, desperate or heartbroken they are. Unfortunately,an OP has to view the idiots of Reddit to get to the people who truly want to help the OP.
I know my childs father is my 2nd cousin. When we did dna markers alot of them match. Our moms are from the same town in mexico and my grandmothers side of men, where cartel and promusicious. Long story short my daughter was from his sa. But i stayed quiet .
Great video, there is nothing like a perfect marriage or relationship, I learnt that in everything there is always a solution, 5 years ago I and my wife divorced because we were having some difficulties in our marriage but we are back together ,it was a really bad phase but we got through it.
there is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without her, I love her so much. wish I can get her back I can do anything to have her back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
its always difficult to let someone you love go, but in my case I had the help of a spiritual adviser who saved my marriage from collapsing her name is SHELLY RENEE WHITE.
RELIGIOUS NUTS .Not good people of faith but those who think Marriage is for life ( even if he smashes her body into strawberry jam cause he's angry she was 1 minute late making dinner, answering the phone, making mac and cheese and he wants steak that she cannot afford off the pittance housekeeping fund.Or her pregnancy will kill her " oh god will save her" She dies after birth " gods will" she and baby die " oh such a shame he didnt get to keep either one oh well they are with sweet baby jesus now" suggest an abortion " no you monster!! But would have saved her. " you monster she should have prayed harder god answers all her prayers it's her fault she didn't pray enough." There you have it in a RELIGIOUS NUT SHELL Like I say plenty of us in faith who actually think WHAT WOULD IN MY CASE JESUS SAY OR DO.. I AINT perfect.
Every person who is getting married or even seriously dating should have a DNA Test. Not only because of adoption but also sperm and egg donations and also family secrets. I know two people who had to tell their kids that they couldn't date certain people cause they were their half siblings after they had already started dating them. They were told the truth after they had brought them home to meet the parents.
Won't happen because of risk-reward. Like, even a full 1st cousin is usually not a big issue if it happens for one generation, and everyone further than 2nd cousin is completely irrelevant. Therefore, the only real risks are literally unknown half siblings.
The sister may not like the new fiance or might like the ex because she's equally toxic and they can be the toxic sisters (by marriage). It's always "fun" to have a friend to bond with to mess with another person like op. Edit people can hide their motives with religious delulu
Bro, I feel so bad for the original poster. Imagine living in a world where you’re the only sane person and everyone around you is crazy trying to claim it’s your fault a random child doesn’t have a father figure.
@@dollsite now I’m really curious about what being Muslim has to do with the story. Not being rude, I am genuinely very curious. 👀 Is it a part of the religion to accept affair children or fatherless children or something? If so then that is something I haven’t heard of. I always love learning more about other religions.
@@OMG_TheFrogs I'm Muslim we don't accept that craziness in story 1. Adoption was practiced by prophet Muhammad PBUH and some of his companions, but harassing a former spouse because the baby daddy ran off is not sanctioned in the religion.
@@L05-td6qm thank you! I actually looked more into the religion as well over the last month and let me just say, the Muslim religion is so beautiful. It is a shame that twisted groups are taking it and using it to promote violence and hate. Learning the true history of the last 40 years in the Middle East/ Muslim countries has been truly heart rending. Lots of tears
I thought it sounded like they were on the same page when they got married, but the ex changed her mind later, or at least pretended to not want kids at first.
Story 2: when i got married we took blood test,because thats what was a standard,this was to know if there could be a problem with genetics,if they did come up you would know and they would know if they were related.
Those were only to see if you had Syphilis as that was what the old standard blood test was for. Many Jewish couples take blood tests related to a genetic disorder, maybe Tay Sacs, but I'm not sure. Genetic testing isn't SOP and has to be specifically requested and funded by the applicants.
The 2nd story is wild, but believable, even if the odds are astronomical for something like that to occur. And I can't say whether I would continue the relationship or not, but I can't really condemn them for doing so. Whats done is done. They didn't grow up together, and they only know each other as they were before they found this out. The kids appear to have no "defects" because of this relationship, and they can stop having kids if they hadn't already decided to do so, to reduce that risk in the future. As for story 1...OP kinda gave away the religious group just by mentioning how recognizable it is. And if it is what I'm thinking it is...lets just say I'm surprised it didn't escalate further.
1st instance of incest isnt a major risk of birth defects as long as the couple is young and healthy. If they tried to have kids when getting past their 30s then complications would become a bigger concern. Now if there are multiple instances of incest in their family line the chance of children inheriting defects goes up a lot. Its an interesting topic if you wanted to look into historical royal bloodlines and how the inbreeding caused the downfall of kingdoms.
I don't really have any experience with marriage, but it's still weird to me how you get all the way past marriage before either of them completely makes up their mind on having children.
Sometimes you think you make up your mind but situations and hormones change. I knew I never wanted children since I was about 11 years old, but for a few years around 28 I caught baby fever. I didn't have a partner, but looked into other options before ultimately deciding against it. Now I'm still childfree at 38 with a bunch of nibblings that I dote on whenever possible, but if I had a partner that had also wanted children, I would have had a few. Thankfully my nibblings cooled the baby fever and I get to continue being fun Auntie instead of mama.
I think that maybe you aren't making it clear enough that the kid is not yours. You don't share dna, but ex is realizing that you are sitting on a pot of money for university costs
The blood tests that states wanted was just to see if either person had syphillis It used to be a huge problem in the US so they started testing every one before marriage so it wasn't a genetic test
Story 1, op was/is very smart for divorcing his ex, He is very correct you can't compromise on children, Seriously if one of them clearly don't want children leave the relationship and move on, there are enough adults who was once children who had, one of their parents resent them that affect them now as adults, and hear them talk feeling that resentment from someone who is suppose to love them unconditionally is sad, Seriously op did the right thing and besides the only people responsible for that child, is his ex and the bio father of the child who's dodging his responsibilities, and honestly op should have just flat out made a post stating "i didn't make ex having another relationship and then lay down with another man to create her son with said other man, the other man she was in a relationship willingly with, she is a grown woman that made her own decisions on her own, that she is responsible for not me, i Don't want to hear any excuses and don't even bother trying to use religion we already sapeated years ago and afterwards she got into relationship and layed down with another man and had he's child so it's beyond too late to bring and she did in fact moved on from me before now, so no I'm not responsible for anything and don't bother lying saying i am when there's clear evidence I'm not and honestly after this post I'm cutting of people who bother to entertain her nonsense.", Because that way not only would op make sure everyone got the message without repeating himself, but make it so ex can't throw a woe was me party/ lie on social media, if op made it clear she was in fact in a relationship with someone else before bothering op and even if she did lie with that post to back up his claim, and a dna test people outside the situation with common sense would lose sympathy for her fast.
OP is not responsible for his ex's child. If the brother-in-law no pieces are so concerned he should take care of him, why don't they go and help take care of the kid?
OP and his ex should have talked about children before they got married, but he's not responsible for her subsequent choices, or her son. She's a single mother who knows she chose poorly and is trying to latch on to OP for stability.
The ex tried to get him back mostly for the money he had. She wasn't looking for a father figure for the child. I wonder how many actually figured that out
When women see you as a push over they will never see you as anything else. The ex thought she could break him down and get control of him. Plus society hates men who arent burdened by responsibility just as much as they hate seeing women with that very responsibility. Im a life long bachelor and the rude side eyes and insults i get reom older women is just funny. They hate seeing a guy who has a solid head on their shoulders and living life with little care
Story 2: See, that is why I would support a law mandating dna testing before marriage. But I am very happy that they took the wisest response to this situation and found their happily ever after.😊
The more I listen to these stories, the more I see how nonsensical people are. How could OP be at fault for not wanting kids and how is it his fault the kid does not have a father? I actually commend him for his mature and selfless acts. Cant they find another man for the child? Ask BILL and see how fast they shot that down.
Why do we have to listen or read the same sentences twice ? We are not morons and understand the first time. How to make a video last 30 min instead of 20 . Disgusting.
The biological mother in the second story failed as she should have kept her legs closed if she didn’t wanna be a single mother. The mother shouldn’t have had any kids if she didn’t wanna be a mother because she is a failure of a mother. What an unfortunate fate that OP and his sister had because when people find out than they are gonna misunderstand the situation
Yeah blame the WOMAN WHY could father NOT poke his baby stick? WHY could the father NOT WEAR A CONDOM STICK AROUND, SUPPORT HIS CHILD FINANCIALLY OR EVEN TAKE HIS CHILD DONT YOU BLAME THE MOTHER YOU would be screaming if she got an abortion I bet.
You are crazy lol. She was as the story said a kid. And it sounds like her parents separated her from the father and probably made her give the baby away. You are a horrible person if this is how you view women but especially a child
NTA at all, you divorced your ex cos she wanted kids and you didn't so why the hell does your sister now think that she has the right to force another man's kid on you? Your sister and the people who are agreeing with her clearly need to see a shrink cos there are definitely a few screws lose in their heads. It's not your fault at all that the kids dad walked away and he doesn't take responsibility for his son, I understand it's hard, my daughter's dad isn't in her life at all and even after being contacted refused to accept her so I do understand it's hard but I would never expect one of my ex's (not even my ex husband) to take responsibility of her. Go back to no contact with your ex and also anyone else who's backing her up
NTA. A dad that has to be convinced,bullied, or cajoled is going to be a resentful presence in that kids life. If someone says they don't want to be a dad ,believe them.
Kids are NEVER something you can compromise on. You BOTH want them or you separate. End of story. Otherwise, resentment will build on one or both parties. One wanting and not getting it annoyed while the other gets what they want, but they, too, are bitter as the other won't stop guilting them about it. Forcing another's hand put kids, mainly, but also the spouse whose hand was forced in dangerous/volatile situations. Idk what is with sisters taking their brother's crazy exes side, but that shows a level of toxicity and disdain of that sibling they kept hidden till then.
Well why won't the bil a fatherly figure for the boy considering he is a "right" kind of man (religion etc). Also if they are Mormon the bil could just marry the oop ex. Problem solved.... 🙄/s (but just a little bit /so 😉. They are always so willing to order sb else to do the hard work...)
Story 1: Yes and no. Wrong on divorcing in the first place but that’s because by the you usually marry, you would have known each other’s stance on family BEFORE getting married. How you hadn’t even thought of bringing up such a possibility and determining if you were both on the page before marriage is rather shocking. Now I’m not saying all marriages would need to have children but that’s usually a topic couples bring up ahead of time and it may be they don’t decide to quickly but wait a few years or several but both should be at least thinking about whether they’d consider it all before trying the knot. No for not wanting to raise someone else’s child or break up your current relationship to be with her again and more so because you are essentially a rebound option now.
3:27 Dude if he had kids then he would’ve resented them their whole lives because he never wanted them and if they didn’t have kids she would resent him because she couldn’t raise a child: I applaud OP for divorce because it was never gonna work out period point blank
Isn't it fascinating that of alllllll the people in the world, people can unknownly get into relationships with relatives. A biological pull toward eachother through shared DNA.. and thats why i got a DNA test done, no brother/husband for me 🤢 😂
This is completely crazy have all The people around you lost their minds? You are engaged to another woman. This kid has no blood relation to you and you have no responsibility for this kid
How is it your fault the kid doesn't have a dad? Um, perhaps it's his dads fault. Miss dalutional is trying to portray you to be the dad. Well her your sister and bil are along with Friends delusional. Ask them if their ex's came to the door with a child that isn't theirs, to be a family even though their ex's are married or whatever to be with them and break up with their wives/husbands. Ask them that. Also, let her know if she doesn't stop harassing you you will get a restraining order.
Wait, how was he an a hole for divorcing her over her demanding kids snd him equally determined to mot have any ??...its a huge decision affecting both their lives at least he was honest and he made it known how he felt...i myself wasnt given a choice when the mother of mine stpped taking B.C pills snd didn't tell me so i could make a suitable change in actions then was mad i didnt even pretend to be happy about it...we split up and me being a responsible guy got back together to raise my daughter...but then she did it again and i resented and hated her for it...i continued to be a responsible parent for my kids..the youngest 22 M..lives with me to this day ...but i could never forgive their mother for not giving me the choice
If someone doesn't want kids that's fine. Why should he change his mind. Its not like he lied or tried to change her mind. God above. He'd be crazy to let them back in there life. Family need to go to the pope and hope they can convince him he's the father. Jesus
I have a weird sense of humor... I thought it was funny and something I totally would have said in the moment. Edit: My wife would have reacted the same way as OP's wife.
2nd story ~ This is the strangest thing I've heard of. I hope they stay together & work it out with both families after they found out they're both brother & sister.
Jeaus christ if op did marry the first girl it wouldnt bave been good she screams shes the kind of girl who would be abusive and rhen when he tried to leave make up lies about him beating her
Never smashed my actual sister, but I did hook up with a girl who wanted to RP that scenario. I was into it until she pulled out fake birth certificates and photoshopped family pictures...Like, I was photoshopped into them. We matched on tinder exactly 3 hours before I went to her place. Second date was worse, she asked for a pregnancy scare and I realised the hotness/crazy scale just doesn't work for me.
I hate how everyone is against OP because it’s not his fault that OP’s ex married the wrong man after the divorce, I would say the ex should stop living in some fantasy that’s not gonna happen. OP’s first mistake was not blocking the ex and OP’s ex should have gone after the bio father for child support.
OPs Ex wife IS deluded and selfish I pity OP, Fiance, Ex wife's child, and the baby daddy who absolutely was baby TRAPPED.
@@toriladybird511agreed. Ex created too many victims in her wake and will feel guilty for it.
feminists believe that women should be able to force any man to father her kids
because everyone is baby rabid brainwashed. a mix of stockholme syndrome and crab in the bucket and dog in manger. parenthood is sh**y. there is plenty of information out there that it is not the fairy tale crapola the media and others use as propaganda. the NO wins. anyone who tries and bully someone into having unwanted kids are the enemy
@@LunaP1sadly this type of person won't. She'll only care and be sorry about what directly affects her. She doesn't even care about how her current actions will affect her children.
So it's okay for the bio dad to decide he doesn't want children, but it's not okay for OP to make the same decision and be responsible about that decision? WTH
The biodad disappeared, so they can't harass him.
He was the easier mark
generally with people like this it’s all dollar signs. I’d presume that bio dad probably made considerably less money.
It's not ok to be bio
"it's your fault that the child I had with some other guy doesn't have a father figure in their life!" ...WHAT???
I feel so bad for the few friends that I blew off what they told me about exs, because I thought no one could possibly actually say shit like that. then my fiance and I got pregnant, and he dropped the mask that had been hiding the narcissism and I started to get the kinds of comments that I had once blown off as an overdramatic friend lying and blowing things out of proportion. and there doesn't even seem to be mental gymnastics involved, they seriously think they're that right on everything, at all times. literally cannot fathom that their bullshit isn't correct
Your sisters husband should step up...since they so invested in this! Ex is crazy!
NTA, not his kids, she just wants a free dad
No, she wants what she has Always wanted. Her and OP to be a family. The whole picture show. OP as hubby and Dad,her as wife and Mom, the house with the dog and both of them raising "their child".
@lindah3803 and to that kind of person "family" means free labor, simply put she wants someone to exploit.
Not his kids, not his shit to deal with, her wants are not OPs obligations.
@@kinosaga21 True, it's not his obligation at all. I still think she wants her "picture show". Yes, that gives her the opportunity to use him as she wants.
Pretty disgusting that his family take his ex's side. He didn't want kids and she did. So they weren't compatible and now they want him to break up with his current fiancée? Block them and go NC.
i don’t know why people think the transplant story is fake.
imagine my surprise when i found out that my ex-husband is my 2nd cousin. he’s white and i’m black.
his great grandmother was my grandfather’s sister. she was a white passing black woman. my paternal grandfather was born in 1899.
i found this out in the early 2000’s. i left him due to him being crazy and abusive (now i know why, i swear it’s genetic) and confirmed it with ancestry dna tests with our son recently
Simple. There are folks on Reddit whose sole purpose is to "prove" a story to be fake . Some believe that because an OP "left out something" in the original post,he/she is hiding something. So their story is fake. With a story like this, there's a whole different line up of assumptions/questions. The whole: This story has to be fake. There's no way you didn't feel a familial connection to your spouse.
If you look so much like her Dad, you would've gotten tested. Just to make sure.
There's no way you wouldn't have told your "wife" before the surgery.
People on Reddit forget/don't take into account that the OP has posted their story when their life has just been blown up. Some situations just happened. Others took place very recently. These are people looking for advice,not English/Spelling lessons, be called a lier or insulted and degraded by Reddit. Depending on the situation and the OP just how angry, deceived, desperate or heartbroken they are. Unfortunately,an OP has to view the idiots of Reddit to get to the people who truly want to help the OP.
It's a lot more common than people think.
Hell if people think that the second story was fake they should look into the fertility industry and sibling pods its all a disaster and horrifying.
I know my childs father is my 2nd cousin. When we did dna markers alot of them match. Our moms are from the same town in mexico and my grandmothers side of men, where cartel and promusicious. Long story short my daughter was from his sa. But i stayed quiet .
Whatever no such thing and white passing blacks
“It’s obvious ex and her kid would always use the money in a ‘godly way.’”
Seriously, why is it _always_ some religious nut?
Great video, there is nothing like a perfect marriage or relationship, I learnt that in everything there is always a solution, 5 years ago I and my wife divorced because we were having some difficulties in our marriage but we are back together ,it was a really bad phase but we got through it.
there is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without her, I love her so much. wish I can get her back I can do anything to have her back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
its always difficult to let someone you love go, but in my case I had the help of a spiritual adviser who saved my marriage from collapsing her name is SHELLY RENEE WHITE.
this is helpful, I will look her up. I hope this works for me too, I really miss her.
"My six year old wife." Yo, what?? 😅
Maybe he's a Muslim.
I mean... it could be a way to describe her behavior.
Sweet home Alabama.
you heard him
@@marie34K r/whoosh.
What kinda lalaland do the ex and sister in story 1 belive this is? Im actually flabbergasted at these mental gymnastics
RELIGIOUS NUTS .Not good people of faith but those who think Marriage is for life ( even if he smashes her body into strawberry jam cause he's angry she was 1 minute late making dinner, answering the phone, making mac and cheese and he wants steak that she cannot afford off the pittance housekeeping fund.Or her pregnancy will kill her " oh god will save her" She dies after birth " gods will" she and baby die " oh such a shame he didnt get to keep either one oh well they are with sweet baby jesus now" suggest an abortion " no you monster!! But would have saved her. " you monster she should have prayed harder god answers all her prayers it's her fault she didn't pray enough."
There you have it in a RELIGIOUS NUT SHELL
Like I say plenty of us in faith who actually think WHAT WOULD IN MY CASE JESUS SAY OR DO..
I AINT perfect.
Seen a similar story, only the sister and mom of OP were the only whackadoodles that wanted him to get back with his abusive ex.
@@LunaP1 they should have got back together with her
That's religion for you, it kills logic
"So I have two other dating options" - I had to laugh at that!
Even the Pope would encourage this guy to divorce his crazy ex.
Every person who is getting married or even seriously dating should have a DNA Test. Not only because of adoption but also sperm and egg donations and also family secrets. I know two people who had to tell their kids that they couldn't date certain people cause they were their half siblings after they had already started dating them. They were told the truth after they had brought them home to meet the parents.
Won't happen because of risk-reward. Like, even a full 1st cousin is usually not a big issue if it happens for one generation, and everyone further than 2nd cousin is completely irrelevant. Therefore, the only real risks are literally unknown half siblings.
Two people at my middle school found out they were cousins when they started dating. They stayed together until my junior or senior year.
1st op has a family in one of those crazy churches.
2nd OP is wild for that "other dating options" joke
How tf is this OP’s fault? He didn’t want kids and she picked the wrong guy. Sister should have minded her business and leave him alone
who commented "did she ever get stuck in a washing machine?" ☠️☠️☠️
I mean atleast she got stuck under the bed. That's a W
@@experiencedotaku171 true 😭😭
What kinda lalaland do the ex and sister in story 1 belive this is? Im actually flabbergasted at these mental gymnastics
The sister may not like the new fiance or might like the ex because she's equally toxic and they can be the toxic sisters (by marriage). It's always "fun" to have a friend to bond with to mess with another person like op. Edit people can hide their motives with religious delulu
I love the joke in story 2
I am so confused. Why are so many people wanting this dude to be a dad to his ex wife's son that isn't biologically hers?! W.T.F
Grandkids! (Sparkle animation!)
Bro, I feel so bad for the original poster. Imagine living in a world where you’re the only sane person and everyone around you is crazy trying to claim it’s your fault a random child doesn’t have a father figure.
OP should have just given her the number foor the local BIG Brother chapter.
FR and over religion too. i'm muslim but this would've driven me crazy
@@dollsite now I’m really curious about what being Muslim has to do with the story. Not being rude, I am genuinely very curious. 👀
Is it a part of the religion to accept affair children or fatherless children or something? If so then that is something I haven’t heard of. I always love learning more about other religions.
@@OMG_TheFrogs I'm Muslim we don't accept that craziness in story 1. Adoption was practiced by prophet Muhammad PBUH and some of his companions, but harassing a former spouse because the baby daddy ran off is not sanctioned in the religion.
@@L05-td6qm thank you! I actually looked more into the religion as well over the last month and let me just say, the Muslim religion is so beautiful. It is a shame that twisted groups are taking it and using it to promote violence and hate. Learning the true history of the last 40 years in the Middle East/ Muslim countries has been truly heart rending. Lots of tears
Whole situation would've gone a lot better if they had discussed having kids BEFORE they got married rather than after
Agree with you on that one.
I thought it sounded like they were on the same page when they got married, but the ex changed her mind later, or at least pretended to not want kids at first.
@@stevenbart2375 It is hard to tell, the ex did probably want kids before marriage but didn't really bring it up
Story 2: when i got married we took blood test,because thats what was a standard,this was to know if there could be a problem with genetics,if they did come up you would know and they would know if they were related.
Those were only to see if you had Syphilis as that was what the old standard blood test was for. Many Jewish couples take blood tests related to a genetic disorder, maybe Tay Sacs, but I'm not sure. Genetic testing isn't SOP and has to be specifically requested and funded by the applicants.
The 2nd story is wild, but believable, even if the odds are astronomical for something like that to occur.
And I can't say whether I would continue the relationship or not, but I can't really condemn them for doing so. Whats done is done. They didn't grow up together, and they only know each other as they were before they found this out. The kids appear to have no "defects" because of this relationship, and they can stop having kids if they hadn't already decided to do so, to reduce that risk in the future.
As for story 1...OP kinda gave away the religious group just by mentioning how recognizable it is. And if it is what I'm thinking it is...lets just say I'm surprised it didn't escalate further.
1st instance of incest isnt a major risk of birth defects as long as the couple is young and healthy. If they tried to have kids when getting past their 30s then complications would become a bigger concern. Now if there are multiple instances of incest in their family line the chance of children inheriting defects goes up a lot. Its an interesting topic if you wanted to look into historical royal bloodlines and how the inbreeding caused the downfall of kingdoms.
I don't really have any experience with marriage, but it's still weird to me how you get all the way past marriage before either of them completely makes up their mind on having children.
It's entirely possible that she /didn't/ want kids when they got married, but feelings and wants change.
This is also why people shouldn't get married so young
Sometimes you think you make up your mind but situations and hormones change. I knew I never wanted children since I was about 11 years old, but for a few years around 28 I caught baby fever. I didn't have a partner, but looked into other options before ultimately deciding against it. Now I'm still childfree at 38 with a bunch of nibblings that I dote on whenever possible, but if I had a partner that had also wanted children, I would have had a few. Thankfully my nibblings cooled the baby fever and I get to continue being fun Auntie instead of mama.
I think that maybe you aren't making it clear enough that the kid is not yours. You don't share dna, but ex is realizing that you are sitting on a pot of money for university costs
Nta if he marry her and she had the child and he accepted it and became the father figure then he has a level of responsibility she got the kid AFTER
Story 1: OP's sister is a loon. Wtf why is she siding with the ex?
Abusers tend to stick together
she's clearly a feminist
it's what they believe
The second story is just the plot of TCOAAL chapter 1
The blood tests that states wanted was just to see if either person had syphillis It used to be a huge problem in the US so they started testing every one before marriage so it wasn't a genetic test
Story 1, op was/is very smart for divorcing his ex,
He is very correct you can't compromise on children,
Seriously if one of them clearly don't want children leave the relationship and move on,
there are enough adults who was once children who had, one of their parents resent them that affect them now as adults, and hear them talk feeling that resentment from someone who is suppose to love them unconditionally is sad,
Seriously op did the right thing and besides the only people responsible for that child, is his ex and the bio father of the child who's dodging his responsibilities,
and honestly op should have just flat out made a post stating "i didn't make ex having another relationship and then lay down with another man to create her son with said other man, the other man she was in a relationship willingly with, she is a grown woman that made her own decisions on her own, that she is responsible for not me, i Don't want to hear any excuses and don't even bother trying to use religion we already sapeated years ago and afterwards she got into relationship and layed down with another man and had he's child so it's beyond too late to bring and she did in fact moved on from me before now, so no I'm not responsible for anything and don't bother lying saying i am when there's clear evidence I'm not and honestly after this post I'm cutting of people who bother to entertain her nonsense.",
Because that way not only would op make sure everyone got the message without repeating himself, but make it so ex can't throw a woe was me party/ lie on social media, if op made it clear she was in fact in a relationship with someone else before bothering op and even if she did lie with that post to back up his claim, and a dna test people outside the situation with common sense would lose sympathy for her fast.
2nd story : home sweet Alabama💀
OP is not responsible for his ex's child. If the brother-in-law no pieces are so concerned he should take care of him, why don't they go and help take care of the kid?
OP and his ex should have talked about children before they got married, but he's not responsible for her subsequent choices, or her son. She's a single mother who knows she chose poorly and is trying to latch on to OP for stability.
The ex tried to get him back mostly for the money he had. She wasn't looking for a father figure for the child. I wonder how many actually figured that out
Well at least you can donate the kidney. Everything else, you may need a therapist
When women see you as a push over they will never see you as anything else. The ex thought she could break him down and get control of him.
Plus society hates men who arent burdened by responsibility just as much as they hate seeing women with that very responsibility.
Im a life long bachelor and the rude side eyes and insults i get reom older women is just funny. They hate seeing a guy who has a solid head on their shoulders and living life with little care
Story 2: See, that is why I would support a law mandating dna testing before marriage. But I am very happy that they took the wisest response to this situation and found their happily ever after.😊
The more I listen to these stories, the more I see how nonsensical people are. How could OP be at fault for not wanting kids and how is it his fault the kid does not have a father? I actually commend him for his mature and selfless acts. Cant they find another man for the child? Ask BILL and see how fast they shot that down.
Are we just going to ignore the fact that in story 2 the OP is one grandchild away from being Uncle Grandpa?
Technically Gruncle Grandpa
Wasn't it the West Borough church that used to put out all those lists of things that were satanic? I remember yoga was on that list
Why all this op doesnt have backbone or common sense in first place.😅😅😅
Why do we have to listen or read the same sentences twice ? We are not morons and understand the first time. How to make a video last 30 min instead of 20 . Disgusting.
The delulu is strong in these people
Still connection with his ex. Wtf how that make sense. Ppl are just dumb
Story2 Holy Crap !!! Finding out your wife is your half-sister is wild AF !!!
The biological mother in the second story failed as she should have kept her legs closed if she didn’t wanna be a single mother. The mother shouldn’t have had any kids if she didn’t wanna be a mother because she is a failure of a mother. What an unfortunate fate that OP and his sister had because when people find out than they are gonna misunderstand the situation
Yeah blame the WOMAN
WHY could father NOT poke his baby stick? WHY could the father NOT WEAR A CONDOM
STICK AROUND, SUPPORT HIS CHILD FINANCIALLY OR EVEN TAKE HIS CHILD
DONT YOU BLAME THE MOTHER
YOU would be screaming if she got an abortion I bet.
You are crazy lol. She was as the story said a kid. And it sounds like her parents separated her from the father and probably made her give the baby away. You are a horrible person if this is how you view women but especially a child
Not just the mother, the father did it too. Dummy. It's also the parents who forced her to give away her kid
NTA at all, you divorced your ex cos she wanted kids and you didn't so why the hell does your sister now think that she has the right to force another man's kid on you? Your sister and the people who are agreeing with her clearly need to see a shrink cos there are definitely a few screws lose in their heads. It's not your fault at all that the kids dad walked away and he doesn't take responsibility for his son, I understand it's hard, my daughter's dad isn't in her life at all and even after being contacted refused to accept her so I do understand it's hard but I would never expect one of my ex's (not even my ex husband) to take responsibility of her. Go back to no contact with your ex and also anyone else who's backing her up
Story 2. So I have possible dating options down the road. OP has a great sense of humor.
Story 1. You are right. No more contact with the past. Enjoy your lives.
Wow that writing flub made it sound like his sister wife was 6yrs old🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
NTA. A dad that has to be convinced,bullied, or cajoled is going to be a resentful presence in that kids life. If someone says they don't want to be a dad ,believe them.
S1, get a lawyer to sue for harassment. Also go after the ex
Last story was so gross. It not their fault but still gross
What is wrong with people ? He has no reason to take on that lil b kid
Kids are NEVER something you can compromise on. You BOTH want them or you separate. End of story. Otherwise, resentment will build on one or both parties.
One wanting and not getting it annoyed while the other gets what they want, but they, too, are bitter as the other won't stop guilting them about it.
Forcing another's hand put kids, mainly, but also the spouse whose hand was forced in dangerous/volatile situations.
Idk what is with sisters taking their brother's crazy exes side, but that shows a level of toxicity and disdain of that sibling they kept hidden till then.
Story 2: OP must be from Alabama
Dating options 😂😂😂😂
Gotta keep a good sense of humor in this crazy world
Okay he had an organ removed, she didn't, it takes longer to heal and its more pain full , the person giving alway takes longer to recover
Stop repeating yourself. Stop repeating yourself. Stop repeating yourself. Stop repeating yourself.
On nah that is incest
1st story...WTF. Not your kid, in what universe do these people who think you should step up come from. NOT YOUR PROBLEM.
Well why won't the bil a fatherly figure for the boy considering he is a "right" kind of man (religion etc). Also if they are Mormon the bil could just marry the oop ex. Problem solved.... 🙄/s (but just a little bit /so 😉. They are always so willing to order sb else to do the hard work...)
Story 1: Yes and no. Wrong on divorcing in the first place but that’s because by the you usually marry, you would have known each other’s stance on family BEFORE getting married. How you hadn’t even thought of bringing up such a possibility and determining if you were both on the page before marriage is rather shocking. Now I’m not saying all marriages would need to have children but that’s usually a topic couples bring up ahead of time and it may be they don’t decide to quickly but wait a few years or several but both should be at least thinking about whether they’d consider it all before trying the knot.
No for not wanting to raise someone else’s child or break up your current relationship to be with her again and more so because you are essentially a rebound option now.
The thumbnail is one helluva Rollercoaster
3:27 Dude if he had kids then he would’ve resented them their whole lives because he never wanted them and if they didn’t have kids she would resent him because she couldn’t raise a child: I applaud OP for divorce because it was never gonna work out period point blank
Last story....come back in 15 years after one of the kids do a 23 In me .........I see disaster coming
Isn't it fascinating that of alllllll the people in the world, people can unknownly get into relationships with relatives. A biological pull toward eachother through shared DNA.. and thats why i got a DNA test done, no brother/husband for me 🤢 😂
This is completely crazy have all
The people around you lost their minds? You are engaged to another woman. This kid has no blood relation to you and you have no responsibility for this kid
How is it your fault the kid doesn't have a dad? Um, perhaps it's his dads fault. Miss dalutional is trying to portray you to be the dad. Well her your sister and bil are along with Friends delusional. Ask them if their ex's came to the door with a child that isn't theirs, to be a family even though their ex's are married or whatever to be with them and break up with their wives/husbands. Ask them that. Also, let her know if she doesn't stop harassing you you will get a restraining order.
TF
Wait, how was he an a hole for divorcing her over her demanding kids snd him equally determined to mot have any ??...its a huge decision affecting both their lives at least he was honest and he made it known how he felt...i myself wasnt given a choice when the mother of mine stpped taking B.C pills snd didn't tell me so i could make a suitable change in actions then was mad i didnt even pretend to be happy about it...we split up and me being a responsible guy got back together to raise my daughter...but then she did it again and i resented and hated her for it...i continued to be a responsible parent for my kids..the youngest 22 M..lives with me to this day ...but i could never forgive their mother for not giving me the choice
If someone doesn't want kids that's fine. Why should he change his mind. Its not like he lied or tried to change her mind.
God above. He'd be crazy to let them back in there life.
Family need to go to the pope and hope they can convince him he's the father. Jesus
Everybody trying to say it's his fault nobody told her told her ex-husband procreate with her then divorce her
Was completely on your side
Then you said you're moving to California
Yourr all fucking crazy lol
This can't be real. "You're an asshole for not playing step dad to a kid you have zero connection to" How does that logic make sense?
I've heard this story before. OP's joke at the end still make me "urgh"
My jaw dropped for a second😂😂
I have a weird sense of humor... I thought it was funny and something I totally would have said in the moment.
Edit: My wife would have reacted the same way as OP's wife.
I'd sympathize with him if he wasn't so stupid as to get back in touch with an ex and think it was a great idea to get "closure" after 16 years.
Not his son, not his wife, not his problem. You gotta be some kinda crazy to think he has any sort of obligation to the child of a different marriage.
What I don't get is how OP is friends with so many religious wackos without being one himself
Story 1Story 2
Story 1 the law needs to be involved.
Story 2 what in the Flowers in the Attic did I just read!
An affair isn't enough to divorce? According to the Bible, it's one of the main reasons to get a divorce.
Please don't put comments in, or if you're going to, emphasize on that in a corner, so that people who want the update can skip them.
2nd story ~ This is the strangest thing I've heard of. I hope they stay together & work it out with both families after they found out they're both brother & sister.
They should care for the kid since they care so much
Literally the only place you were even kinda in the wrong is not having that coversation before marrige
Jeaus christ if op did marry the first girl it wouldnt bave been good she screams shes the kind of girl who would be abusive and rhen when he tried to leave make up lies about him beating her
"Fluid spiritual beliefs" god damn. She's all up in astrology isn't she 😮💨
Story 2: Op has good sense of humor (i have dating options down the road if needed)
"Yes I can play the banjo" own it I guess
Story 1: OP needs new friends and go NC with family
The thumbnail mentioned an assault in the 1st story, but it never happened? What is up with that?
1st OP’s sister, BIL and family are delulu
I’d suggest your BIL step up to be father figure as he is so eager to force OP to step up.
Does anyone else find it creepy that the doctor said hey you have mighty fine organs
Never smashed my actual sister, but I did hook up with a girl who wanted to RP that scenario. I was into it until she pulled out fake birth certificates and photoshopped family pictures...Like, I was photoshopped into them. We matched on tinder exactly 3 hours before I went to her place. Second date was worse, she asked for a pregnancy scare and I realised the hotness/crazy scale just doesn't work for me.
😮
"My six year old wife." Uh, might want to edit that part.
Sweet home Alabama 😅 how does something like happen.
12:18 this is really the most important question who and what are these people so I can know to stay away from the sort