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When you said music saved your life I just broke down. I have given up my music career for other people's expectations and I am slowly beginning to heal.
Thank you.
We need other people, but we also need the support that only can come from within. I like the way that you express this.
YES! We have to become our own rock and live our dreams, not depend on others to save us.Thanks for posting.
You helped me a great deal on self realization, growth, and overcoming my INFJ weaknesses. Thanks!
Love your videos so much. I have a problem with one-sided relationships and lacking assertiveness. I definitely feel much stronger now with this knowledge, and recently just took action to get away from someone who has taking too much of my energies.
Thank you so much for this. This resonates soooo much with me.
Im at the beach as in watching this! 😊
I really needed this video. Thank you. I did some research on the Fe thing and I think I'm a slave to my own Fe, which is exhausting. Now, this might be because I'm a Turbulent INFJ (actually, what's the difference?), but I always put others' feelings above my own, and I find it so hard to say No to a person, even a stranger, who I feel unconsciously needs my emotional support. I think this is why I'm addicted to tobacco (and I have asthma, so I really *need* to quit, like, yesterday). But I find it hard to treat myself as another person too. I feel it is selfish of me to not give somebody my emotional support, when I know they need it. After all, I have something that can make them feel better. If I don't give it to them, while I know they need it, it feels like I'm a bad person. I mean, it's like not giving money to the poor. You have something that can make them feel better, so isn't it selfish of you to keep it all to yourself?
I also think it is not keep it to ourselves...more than that, we start getting depressed over it and in the end we realize we need to use our gift so we give it to someone without caring for our boundaries...that is why I think it is important to find a way to help people without getting "too emotionally involved"...help out at a youthcenter, help your friends...just make sure you don't do it and expect one person to give you validation that your life has meaning...that is when it gets dangerous...the more you encorporate helping people you are not in an intimate relationship with (meaning familiy, really close friends, a romantic partner ) the better..I love to help but I have realized that in the end everybody has to save themselves, we can be a helping hand and a motivating one...but we can never take that burden away from somebody
Wenzes Wauw, thanks for replying! :) I do see what you mean, but it is not that I *want* to listen to someone's problems. It's more like, they see I'm willing to listen, start venting emotions, and at the end I'm left feeling drained. To give a tiny example, two days ago I crashed because of everyone coming to me with their emotionally bad vibrations so to speak, and not having enough alone time to recover from that. And so I was sitting in the garden of my parents' place trying to have that alone time, and my dad comes up and asks a simple question, namely "have I shown you the pictures of my trip from last weekend?". Now, he just recently found out that he has an incurable illness, so I didn't want to tell him that just some hours before I mentally cracked. But this was my alone time, so I tried to set boundaries by saying "not now, dad", and his face was just horrible, .. absolute disappointment all over it. Like, I couldn't even give him 5 minutes? So after seeing his face I said, "ok, ok, show me". And he showed me and I said it looked like fun because I knew that's what he needed to hear, and then he went off. And the irony in all of this is that at the very moment that he asked me this, I was writing down: "The love for myself is greater than the love for others." And this tiny moment with my dad just showed that this belief wasn't the case at all, as if all I was doing was trying to persuade myself that it was. I guess the point is just that, I have no idea how to stop caring about others' emotions. Or how to set boundaries, for that matter. But your most recent video gave me quite some insight in that, so thank you for that :)
That's why we like music!
🎶 ❤️
excellent advice
thank you :)
This was one of your most insightful and helpful videos for me!
Thank you, Wenzes! :)
thanks so much for your feedback, highly appreciated and really happy it's helpful for you 👍😊
Wowow
thank you!!!
Have you done one on the tendency of the type 9 or INFJ even....to bend and twist themselves to fit into environments?
sure I have...but not anymore...
I'm also an INFJ, I'm selfless, I love helping people, they're happy I'm happy. I feel like a protector or a paladin. That being said, is your name Portia? What ethnicity are you?
+Sylvia Lopez Hi Sylvia, my name is Wenzes and I am originally from Bulgaria :)
Can you do a self introduction of your entire life please? And how you first encountered myer briggs? As you may know, you're our youtube star for all INFJs in the world. Hail Wenzes, mother of all INFJs!
+Sylvia Lopez I'm flattered, thanks! I have talked about my journey in the videos in the beginning, if it goes with the topic I will get into it again :)