I was 19, the narcissist was a professor at a prestigious university. I was flattered this person took an interest in me, though i did not understand why.
I good cry is great! A toxic narcissist person bottle's that up and it turns to more hate and anger and they just carry that rage over to the next person. So you still think their happy without you? 🤔 Answer is no! They can never be truly happy their just happy with what the new person can provide for them. Facts!!
Was so in love with the narc once upon a fairytale time. Then came the confusion and fog. The discard was when I started looking up some key words and "Boom" there it was... narcissism! I was convinced it was written for him. only to find it applies to them the world over. I am happy to be rid of this complete and utter FAKE and another female who is just like him... may they have a shallow and doomed relationship.
Yes, I was a different person when I met the narcissist. I was a good, kind & loving person. I had good values. But, I like who I am now better. I am wiser. I have tools to utilize. I have an even greater appreciation for everything. And I have found the freedom to be me. Not who the world wants me to be. When you heal completely you not only loose the chains of the narcissist, you loose chains the world had on you and some that you had placed on yourself. Praise be to God. Great video Andrew. Very insightful & strong. Love your background & the sunlight shining through the trees 🙂. Thank you for the work that you do. I am grateful for you 🙂. Have a good night. God bless ☀️☀️☀️
What impressed me in what you said here is “ you loose the chains you have placed on yourself” this is so true in my going forward with my life in freedom. Thank you for putting this into words
Hi Andrew, thank you for keeping the videos coming for us all, you *are* much appreciated. Narcissism is *insidious* -it does kill people less fortunate than ourselves. #GladYouMadeIt 💜
When I first met the narcissist, he looked totally different than how he looked when I saw him the last time. I will always remember the look of Satan, himself, that I saw in his eyes during his rage fit. That's the day, last year, that I had decided it would now be no contact. Best decision of my life! CHECKMATE!! Thank you so much for the knowledge that I received 2 days prior to that day, Andrew. NAMASTE❤
I was vulnerable and alone and wanted to believe in love and help them. I will never be the same, because now I know. I cannot process or survive this on a human level. I choose to rise above like an eagle and compartmentalize my love and forgiveness for them. 🙏🏻🦅❤ God bless you Andrew, always & forever..
I understand. I thought I could heal and help them too. We are fortunate ones. We are on the way to a fulfilling life filled with joy happiness and peace.
The pattern I see when I first met a narcissist (there are several in my life) is the lovebombing. Multiple compliments. When I meet someone new and I hear a bunch of compliments, I assume the person is a narcissist. I watch their behavior and listen to them. I adjust myself accordingly. I was trusting because I had no idea what narcissism exists. With knowledge comes the power to make better choices going forward in life.
@ickypop9255 It’s not normal compliments. It’s lots of them, over the top, they are buttering you up..to eat later. I still like to hear a compliment, but I now observe more closely.. do they follow the compliments later by little insults? Do their words match their actions? Etc
Another tactic is the Blue Beard Syndrome......they put bells on the horse reins, they tell you of all they things they will help you with, they try to make you think you need them.
Your right I was only 18 didnt know what a Narcissist was now idea. After 40 yrs of marriage traded me in for a new model ruined my life. Don’t want to ever see his face again. I’m very happy now.😂
I was naive, very vulnerable, and love-starved -- coming out of a neglectful marriage (yes, I married 2 narcissists, ugh) and parenting 2 young kids solo -- and fell completely for the white knight act. Fast forward 9 years, he cheated on me, embezzled from my business, stole from my retirement, took my car, tried to take my kids' cars, trashed my house and filled it with squalor, and financially abused me to a horrific level. Then, full discard.
@o0kaaris0o Omg!! I’m so sorry! I think many of us have no idea how vulnerable we are.. I’m so so sorry this happened to you! I wish you lots of safety and peace and self compassion as you recover and as Andrew says, become the even better updated even stronger updated of you. 💖💖💖
Predators on the hunt. Like lions in the jungle, always searching for the vulnerable and weak. Now I know better, I do better. The past is behind me and I only look forward! Blessings! ❤❤
I was living in an assisted living facility when the Narc asked me to go out with him I never really spoke to him i thought hed be ok wow what a mess triangulations and all i was going through a rough time
I remember this well . I had just relocated and was really down on myself after a breakup from another toxic person. So of course I was vibrating low and attracted another one. This time has to be different. I’m documenting it on my channel as I’m in day one of no contact. (Shameless plug). Stop in and help hold me accountable!
Yes I was vulnerable, I met him at work. He love-bombed thru caregiving acts and we married too quickly. It was a roller coaster. I saved money to leave. I didn't just run out the door and confront him because he was violent , he knew what he was doing. I made it out alive. I found videos on narcissm, went no contact and divorced. My eyes are wide open now. Thank you for your videos. I left in 2015 and couldn't find much on this subject on youtube back then.
Golden information. Free AND accurate. The best information freeing me a continuous life of oppression. Ty Andrew I love your intuition and for sharing it with us.😊
Haven't been in a relationship in over 2 years now and it's definitely not on my #1 priority list too many toxic people in today's world and I really enjoying being single. But what I've learned is if a relationship is moving to fast red flag city!
Thank you Andrew for dedicating a piece of your life toward helping others. You turned your pain into power. I have this inner knowing too, that my purpose on this planet is to help others shine however I can. Right now, I am not in a good mind space to do that, so until I can work through my issues and come from my heart space, I need to be still. Can't pour from a cup half full. ❤️✨️
I was taken advantage of, and exposed my kids to the narcissist X. It haunts me. I did not know about the evil malignant narcissist until 10 years after I divorced him. I had about 100 foster children, and adopted 8 of them who were unable to be reunited with their birth family. I wish I'd have known. 2 of my kids are still trying to gain daddy's love. I can't help them with that.😢
🙈 Yep didn't know what the narcissist was 🙈 I was a shiney bright light. Untill he dulled it or can I say he poured mud on me untill I couldn't breath anymore it was a smothering I never knew a human could do to another human . All that crappy relationship was a death of a soul to destroy and actually it was untill it wasn't.❤ Comming up from that quicksand and deep dark hole is a miracle in its self. The universe had a different plan for me and I'm so grateful and appreciate the love and peace that I know now. Clarity is a word I don't say lightly. Peace and love you all beautiful souls out there. Keep on keeping on your amazing which ever stage your at right now in this minute you have made it love and peace to you all xx
Met both my narc X husband & narc fake girl friend in church. 2 different churches, different years.... & both narcs approached & started talking to me. Years invested in both... only to lead me to this channel. My lesson to learn & MOVING ON! 🌈 🎀😘
@lela888 Yes they are everywhere & looking to take advantage of good natured as well as vulnerable people. They are all about dominance & control. So glad to have gained the wisdom....I can identify them clearly now! Take good care 🌈 🎀😘
I was in the same boat came to Texas met my kids daddy didn't know what I got myself into I knew he was a different type of man about money,cars, love to dress, stay in the club shift blame for his child support and made me help paid for what his kids momma did to him I met my ex-husband narc through working at the state facility and I told how my kids daddy was doing not wanting to married me, neglect me stay in the clubs not paying me any attention well they all grow-up together went to school together but her brother is the baby of the family so he know of him but not raise around, so she introduce me in a,sort casual way before I knew we talk hit it off fast love bomb me so much he blew my mind I left my kids daddy because I thought we had something in common we love the same music the same people he didn't finish school but I accept him, he never work, so he was on probation after I found myself doing so much for him, I love him so much but there was so many red flag from him and that family but kept fighting to be with him we even got married for 2 years but I divorce he started cheating but he cheat on me the first time he can back from the SafeP drug rehab center, with a young girl 20 and he was 49 years-old, I couldn't believe after that he got in trouble again went to prison for 3years came and did again. I knew something was wrong but I couldn't put my figure on it I knew his personality was different until his momma died last year in January 2023 2 months later discarded me for a new supply after 17 years plus throw away like trash I never Abandon him stay by his side calling me when his grandfather died, daddy pass away in 2016 he was messing with someone then but I still was there for him this time around I couldn't do anymore he cheated on me while we was married brought the woman to the momma house they both smear campaign me, after the divorce I became the side piece ex wife I was confused on all of this but this time I had nothing left to fight for spend a decade trying to get him to appreciate me favor me for trying to change to he that good woman but I lost at the end big time I waste money,time energy, and a broken heart torn to pieces for giving him the benefit of the doubt. My ex-husband narc kept his promise to the first woman he cheated with that if I was the last woman on earth he would never f!!! with me again and he mint it with all his heart I never treated him bad I never abandon him try to show him I love him and deeply care but he really despite me when stop my life to care for his momma and she never treated or would introduce me as her daughter in law all them gaslighted and future fake me and my kids like we was a charity case. I stood by him son now I paying the price for being good spending money on someone who never love me at all.😢
I'll never go through that again. In Midnight Gospel, it shows how we are shackled to narcs and how we poke each other's eyes out. I'd suggest watching this with someone if they have experienced narcissism. It's all about the journey.
When you first met the narcissist...you were a person that shared something with many others...you felt like you weren't heard or seen by others in your life. You also, like many others, were unaware of this personality disorder you were about to find out about and sitting right in front of you was ONE OF THEM ready to pounce on its prey. Suddenly, you had the full attention of someone and you were soaking it in, it felt good. Unfortunately, the narc was soaking things in too, things to use against you for their benefit and to ultimately hurt you. It's a learning experience and a loss of innocence. Consider this: I read a book written by someone who went thru the same wringer we have, the author quoted that (if memory serves me correctly) " 1 in 7 people are hardwired to hurt, exploit, or destroy others." That's stunning...even if it were only 1 in 10. Now you have the awareness, be discerning with all people you meet and learn to say "no" often and to cut the cord quickly if need be.
The "1 in 7" startled me. Then, I realized all this Narc info. will come in handy with each passing day. I feel fortunate to have come across this education and dived head first into it.
be discerning with all people..exactly...keeping my heart close to my vest and mouth zippered shut...no longer assuming people are honest or kind like me and watching to see if their actions and words match
there was not one time we were out of town or on vacation that I did not "upset him"I always did something wrong. looking back every birthday I was wrong about something and I remember every birthday of mine I was left apologizing. in the beginning it was awesome, rubbing my back, feet... then later he said things like oh yeh I did that when you were nice to me and that is no more.
All that internalized insecurity was unloaded on you. Beneath that Mask is a weak person. Traveling with a Narc is sometimes a good test. They are in unfamiliar territory and you'll find out quickly their inability to just enjoy and flow -it becomes the opposite. Yuck! I've experienced that and was always puzzled with those Vacation Killers.
Same- he used to shower me with back and foot rubs, trips… but he always got mad at me every trip for SOMETHING… and itcended with no physical contact whatsoever I felt like Mrs. Roper just trying to give a hug only to be winced at…
Thank you for another great and helpful video, Andrew 🙏✨🌈 It’s almost 2 months post-breakup & no contact that it’s all making more sense. I was brought up in a narcissistic household. My dad is covert and my mum has enabled it and invalidated my emotions and my experiences greatly. They have always set me up for failure. I’ve known in the back of my head for a while, but it’s all becoming clearer why it has always been this way. Good luck to everyone else on their journeys and their healing 🙏🤞❤️✨🌈
Putting it mildly, "Our parents had issues." They sent you ( myself as well ) out into the world psychologically and emotionally "de-clawed." It's OK, Now We Know and the rest is self- preservation. With this wisdom, Narcs will have a hell of time should they try any game, from any angle. Knowing about them was the 1st major step.
I was young, and I was vulnerable. Back then, I only saw good in people. I wanted to be in a couple. Grateful to be solo now at this age. God bless you A. and tribe. Stay safe and well.♥️
I feel that my dna has been altered by my narc. I choose to believe that it’s a good thing and that it was meant to be. I am a better version of me now. To all the flying monkeys I left behind with my narc they would disagree because I can no longer be played. I’m not as soft, loving or trusting as I was. Thank goodness! If I ever do love again I will not do it with my whole heart. I will forever keep the most precious parts of me private. As much as I love being an empath, I do feel that it is also a curse. I struggle with that everyday. How could I love so fully and be hurt so terribly. Never ever want to experience that again. 25 years with him at least taught me that much.
You nailed this, Andrew.. I could write a book... Talk about layers to peell back. You are so right.. Definitely did not know what I was up against. At first. Introduction.... A lot of my responses through text were the letter k.. About seven months in. Prior to that talk about adoration texts.. Unbelievable. Thank you for your content, Andrew. It's certainly taught me a lot.
Great video Andrew!! Words could never describe how grateful I am for your help and all of the people in this community. GLAD YOU MADE IT !!!!!!!! Wishing everyone clarity and peace.... 🙏
Realization in therapy today.. thinking back to the early days with the narc I was in the midst of a bitter divorce/custody battle. The narc kept bringing up my ex wife which kept me in a perpetual state of anger and stress. It dawned on me today (12 years later) that this was a manipulation.. to keep my energy vibrating low so she could vibrate higher. This happened in conjunction with the love bomb- I was already addicted to her.
When I met the narcissist, i had just lost my father. My ex discarded me a couple of months ago after 5 years at Christmas time. He too, left me sick broke and facing eviction. My sons wife died in January leaving two small children. His response was to cut off power and heat because I went no contact. Now he wants money? He holds the lease in his name and can have me evicted anytime. Still trying to get out.
About of narcassists hide their true intentions under the guise of polyamory. My partner would say she was looking for someone for us but she was looking for my replacement. Certain relationship structures make it harder to spot a narcassist. She never cared how I felt tho. She’s the worst person I’ve ever met and somehow I still can’t beat the thought of her not being in my life. I’ve never been loved my entire life and I’m 47
I got chaught in my weakest time,, after a big loss,,I didn’t listen to my gut feelings,, they talked very loud and clear,, but my need for love and care was so intense,, that’s where he could crawl in,, that was the crack he could get inside my heart!!! Now I know this! I learned so much about this,, now I see,, and take care and listen to my gut!! Thx Andrew your channel gave me the wisdom to heal! And to trust me again!
The narc is only interested in the novelty of the chase. Once they snag you, the relationship often moves at light speed and is very physical. Not long after that, novelty also wears off, and they're back to baiting, catching, and switching. Don't take the bate. Be very analytical about whom you let into your personal space
Fabulous video..yes who I was when I met him...a widow..relocated...new in group...didnt know about covert narc at all..but now almost a year post discard and educated...I am strong..happy..reclaiming my joys..art..skiing..many new adventures..embodied educated empath..grateful for every drop of wisdom from this channel and all the coaching from Andrew that has helped me grow..galvanize..and move into third version...love this video because who i was then and who I am now is worth the price of admission to the house of horrors of the narc show...take the tools and apply...never give up..persist and put the light in you on yourself whole heartedly...Namaste and deep bows of gratitude..the journey continues informed and new.
I had no place to go, he was the best option for free stay in exchange for work in the garden. I just wanted some change of environment, peace and quiet, but he took me on his rollercoaster love bombing future faking road. After 7 weeks (also with a past full of narcissistic abuse) I was totally drained and in panic mode, then he discarded me. Totally broke. While we had a lot of fun, he still had to destroy it/me. Smear campagne followed in a very small village. I knew something was off but couldn't get to my own thoughts due to the fog.
I finally realized I’m exactly what my dad said I was. Before this last discarding I thought to myself my dad always said I was a good wife but all I’d ever want in life wasn’t a husband but some guy to send a paycheck. He said I couldn’t love people. So, now I’m done cuz all I have is a paycheck until he decides not to send money. My dad was right
Keep doing what you’re doing Andrew . Your personal experience and advice has helped many people, and I am sure has also helped you in your own personal healing process. I find that sharing my personal experiences with other victims of Narcissistic abuse helps me on my healing journey 🙏
Thank you for confirming the reality and I am not crazy. Out now, healing and transforming. Your videos provide the understanding. Greatly appreciated.
March 31st...your rebirth day is my birthday ❤ going to check out that video, wondering what kind of abuse did i get for present back then 🤔 never again ☀️🌻
They are throwing baits with very weak reasoning. I am not stopping here Andrew, it is all the way to the finish line. I consider myself lucky to have found friends who really cared.
From the outside to the uneducated they can seem so confident , funny and charming , not to mention impressively knowledgeable !! It's all part of their game !
Im watching my narc husband just excited bc he thinks im going to sell some real estate i inherited. Hes dreaming of his vacation hes taking by himself. Its funny to watch. He thinks he has it made spending my money. Im using the cash for divorce.
Ha I'm first... I love you everyday. I can't hear it enough. Are you a new widow? I have to wonder when I get pushed and pushed I have rages but it takes a slow build up. Now I'm working on boundaries like crazy. Thanks for your valuable insight I thought i've had to change the game of chess that hasn't changed in millennia. whenever the queen lands on a spot that color that spot comes off the chess board so only the queen that took that spot can use it. I left the narc dr Sam Vit something. He's a narcissist that educates deep dish. You're ice cream. But I have to have your encouragement every day. I'm so empathic I can't be around people because I'm too sensitive to toxicity. The negativity is double downed because I do it to myself. He tried to tell me he's the empath when he's stole so much monet
I would like to rise above thecplace Im now in post Narcissit !! Vulnerable, Hiding ,dull & boring !!! Quite ,Im actually attractive vibrant person,!! I've more work on bringing My sexy back !!! There's always another Narcissit out there !! Im free ,want to celebrate The person I am now , Yes this was a great video From a person not afraid to show his strength & beauty .
It does take time, I think over six months in only interact with good friends, isolating and focusing on me. Today I don’t feel that dark and the disturbing energy hanging over my head disappeared. People that see me often told me: You look different today. You look good! Yeah! 💃🏻That inner Peace is back 🙏 Thank You Andrew my North Star! You Rock big time! ⭐ Namaste 🙏
Hi Andrew, it's done..... I don't know how to feel. Life brought tough challenges on Sunday, we were set up by local sheriff's, targeting us because I went to the hospital. With an issue, I was taken out of the exam room and had county accommodations for two full days. Narcs make you strong, the worst part was the food!!! Oh my gosh, I drank a lot of water! It was a nightmare. We finally found a detective today willing to help and took two felons and dropped our charges. The deputy knew we had our divorce coming up and did what they could to interfere. Absolutely disgusted with the sheriff's dept in Florida, nationally known hard arse sheriff. It could have been worse, I take meds you need to wean off of, got me on a smaller med watch unit for possible reaction to certain prescriptions. I did great with no coffee, I thought head aches for sure. So we go to the judge together and he stood there and found HIS STORY was what he was going by!!! You're not supposed to ask? only answer. I asked him, the judge if he was serious, he was blowing my mind, he let this man get OVER on him. My bond was lowered?.only $500, but I was STILL THE DANG VICTIM. This is the same part of us being set up. Strangely sent us to divorce court, somewhat unified over the injustice of that deputy. I'm so glad someone is finally listening in that area. I am the dang target by all. I will have a separate meeting with the detective to show med dates and events that coincide, making things impossible, but when the boys in blue flash badges, someone else sadly pays the victim price. I AM A NEWLY SINGLE SURVIVOR!!!!
Don’t give up yourself 💪 I pray and meditate everyday with my morning coffee, that is my routine that works for me. When not sure what to do? Do nothing then I cannot be wrong. I bounce things off trusted friends before I act. I take control of my destiny. First thing first. Praying for you 🙏❤💐keep watching Andrew videos. Knowledge is power 👏Peace is priceless
The most maddening thing about my past is I can see in hindsight that I actively disliked every single one of my girlfriends when I first met them, but came to like them over time. At the time I - thanks to the indoctrination of romantic comedies, doubtless mostly written by narcissists in the entertainment industry - romanticised our “coming together against the odds”, but it was actually just them building a new mask tailored to me.
I’m dealing with a covert narcissistic mother. First I felt lost after hurtful, hidden and subtle verbal attacks from her. Now after getting myself together and doing my homework, by learning and teaching myself about all the different narcissistic behaviours, I feel empowered and strong to go no contact. Now she has to deal with me and the new situation, not I with her! Sad but true!
When I was younger, I thought most people did have people's best interests and I looked for the good in people. I knew their were some bad people out there but I thought there was more good then bad. I had to learn the hard way but I'm glad that I learned.
We survivors are now the most powerful force for good on the planet.
Forced for good are jits used and exploited
I was vulnerable, hurting, unwise, now I’m secure, focused, and wise ❤I’m working on my way out!!! Hallelujah
congratulations! I’m thrilled for you. Life will be getting better and better. 🦋🦅💪
Go Baby go😅🥰💕🌈🕊
@@NikkiGRocks4Ever peace Love and healing 💕🌈🐑
@@marylamb56 Yes Mary. You too. May you have peace, hope, and love. 😊🦋🌈🌺
@@NikkiGRocks4Ever 🥰💕Ditto 🙏🏼🐑
I was 19, the narcissist was a professor at a prestigious university. I was flattered this person took an interest in me, though i did not understand why.
What a force we are...Empaths with Boundaries! How powerful ❤
❤
❤️🩹💜❤️🔥 yes amen 😊😊😊
yes Andrew the mountaintop of indifference bamboozled the narcissist they failed to take us down for the count
Standing ovations to all of you! Glad WE made it.
Amen! 🔥🔥🔥💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼💯💯💯©️
I good cry is great! A toxic narcissist person bottle's that up and it turns to more hate and anger and they just carry that rage over to the next person. So you still think their happy without you? 🤔 Answer is no! They can never be truly happy their just happy with what the new person can provide for them. Facts!!
Was so in love with the narc once upon a fairytale time. Then came the confusion and fog. The discard was when I started looking up some key words and "Boom" there it was... narcissism! I was convinced it was written for him. only to find it applies to them the world over. I am happy to be rid of this complete and utter FAKE and another female who is just like him... may they have a shallow and doomed relationship.
Your light and love shines. shine on Andrew!
❤️
Yes, I was a different person when I met the narcissist. I was a good, kind & loving person. I had good values. But, I like who I am now better. I am wiser. I have tools to utilize. I have an even greater appreciation for everything. And I have found the freedom to be me. Not who the world wants me to be. When you heal completely you not only loose the chains of the narcissist, you loose chains the world had on you and some that you had placed on yourself. Praise be to God. Great video Andrew. Very insightful & strong. Love your background & the sunlight shining through the trees 🙂. Thank you for the work that you do. I am grateful for you 🙂. Have a good night. God bless ☀️☀️☀️
Nice message!❤
Well said. I feel exactly the same as your comment.
Well spoken.
What impressed me in what you said here is “ you loose the chains you have placed on yourself” this is so true in my going forward with my life in freedom. Thank you for putting this into words
Healing from cataract surgery and relieved to be solo. Stay strong, tribe!❣️
Heal well! 🤓
@@allieeverett9017 Thank you, dear one.❣️
@@allieeverett9017 thank you❣️
Hi Andrew, thank you for keeping the videos coming for us all, you *are* much appreciated. Narcissism is *insidious* -it does kill people less fortunate than ourselves. #GladYouMadeIt 💜
😌🙌🙏
We'll never know who offed themselves, whose souls were already reduced to rubble who jumped off bridges, RIP.
When I first met the narcissist, he looked totally different than how he looked when I saw him the last time.
I will always remember the look of Satan, himself, that I saw in his eyes during his rage fit. That's the day, last year, that I had decided it would now be no contact. Best decision of my life! CHECKMATE!!
Thank you so much for the knowledge that I received 2 days prior to that day, Andrew. NAMASTE❤
Welcome 🙌💯❤️
This guy is so on the mark with this video. It's like he's telling my story.
He's telling all of our stories...
😌😌🙏
I was vulnerable and alone and wanted to believe in love and help them.
I will never be the same, because now I know. I cannot process or survive this on a human level. I choose to rise above like an eagle and compartmentalize my love and forgiveness for them. 🙏🏻🦅❤ God bless you Andrew, always & forever..
I felt the same way, it's hard moving through this.
I understand. I thought I could heal and help them too.
We are fortunate ones. We are on the way to a fulfilling life filled with joy happiness and peace.
The pattern I see when I first met a narcissist (there are several in my life) is the lovebombing. Multiple compliments.
When I meet someone new and I hear a bunch of compliments, I assume the person is a narcissist. I watch their behavior and listen to them. I adjust myself accordingly.
I was trusting because I had no idea what narcissism exists.
With knowledge comes the power to make better choices going forward in life.
That’s kinda shitty people can’t even compliment you anymore now tho. That’s bs
@ickypop9255 It’s not normal compliments. It’s lots of them, over the top, they are buttering you up..to eat later.
I still like to hear a compliment, but I now observe more closely..
do they follow the compliments later by little insults? Do their words match their actions? Etc
@@annastone5624 Thank you Anna. I like how you express yourself. “They butter you up to eat you later.” I like the metaphor. It’s very true.
🫶
Another tactic is the Blue Beard Syndrome......they put bells on the horse reins, they tell you of all they things they will help you with, they try to make you think you need them.
They are predators ....
Checkmate. And not willing to take responsibility for the damage narcs cause. 🙂
That's very crucial mechanism
@@barsnacker 🙂
Your right I was only 18 didnt know what a Narcissist was now idea. After 40 yrs of marriage traded me in for a new model ruined my life. Don’t want to ever see his face again. I’m very happy now.😂
I was naive, very vulnerable, and love-starved -- coming out of a neglectful marriage (yes, I married 2 narcissists, ugh) and parenting 2 young kids solo -- and fell completely for the white knight act. Fast forward 9 years, he cheated on me, embezzled from my business, stole from my retirement, took my car, tried to take my kids' cars, trashed my house and filled it with squalor, and financially abused me to a horrific level. Then, full discard.
😌😌🙏
@o0kaaris0o Omg!! I’m so sorry!
I think many of us have no idea how vulnerable we are.. I’m so so sorry this happened to you! I wish you lots of safety and peace and self compassion as you recover and as Andrew says, become the even better updated even stronger updated of you. 💖💖💖
*version
Predators on the hunt. Like lions in the jungle, always searching for the vulnerable and weak. Now I know better, I do better. The past is behind me and I only look forward! Blessings! ❤❤
Hope all you beautiful warriors are keeping well,and taking great care of yourself,,and you too Andrew,,🌼❤️🌺💖🌼❤️🕊️🕊️
I wish the same for you 😊
Right back at you lovely💖
Thanks, Flower! You too!❤
Thank you flowerpower
…you as well
✨💖✨🌸☀️💪🌷💯💞🪷🦋😘
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I was living in an assisted living facility when the Narc asked me to go out with him I never really spoke to him i thought hed be ok wow what a mess triangulations and all i was going through a rough time
I remember this well . I had just relocated and was really down on myself after a breakup from another toxic person. So of course I was vibrating low and attracted another one. This time has to be different. I’m documenting it on my channel as I’m in day one of no contact. (Shameless plug). Stop in and help hold me accountable!
Yes I was vulnerable, I met him at work. He love-bombed thru caregiving acts and we married too quickly. It was a roller coaster. I saved money to leave. I didn't just run out the door and confront him because he was violent , he knew what he was doing. I made it out alive. I found videos on narcissm, went no contact and divorced. My eyes are wide open now. Thank you for your videos. I left in 2015 and couldn't find much on this subject on youtube back then.
You've come so far! We're all proud of you. ❤
Golden information. Free AND accurate. The best information freeing me a continuous life of oppression. Ty Andrew I love your intuition and for sharing it with us.😊
Haven't been in a relationship in over 2 years now and it's definitely not on my #1 priority list too many toxic people in today's world and I really enjoying being single. But what I've learned is if a relationship is moving to fast red flag city!
It IS another GREAT vid ! Tears are running down my face with IMPACT ofthe Powerful, encouraging empathic message, THANK YOU.
Thank you Andrew for dedicating a piece of your life toward helping others. You turned your pain into power. I have this inner knowing too, that my purpose on this planet is to help others shine however I can. Right now, I am not in a good mind space to do that, so until I can work through my issues and come from my heart space, I need to be still. Can't pour from a cup half full. ❤️✨️
Welcome 😌🙌🙏
I was taken advantage of, and exposed my kids to the narcissist X. It haunts me. I did not know about the evil malignant narcissist until 10 years after I divorced him. I had about 100 foster children, and adopted 8 of them who were unable to be reunited with their birth family. I wish I'd have known. 2 of my kids are still trying to gain daddy's love. I can't help them with that.😢
pro tip: setting playback speed to 1.5 gets the healing done faster.
Ty
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I always turn my head with you in the beginning of your videos!
Me too🤣
I know, its so cute!
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Every day getting stronger 🙏🙏
🙈 Yep didn't know what the narcissist was 🙈 I was a shiney bright light. Untill he dulled it or can I say he poured mud on me untill I couldn't breath anymore it was a smothering I never knew a human could do to another human . All that crappy relationship was a death of a soul to destroy and actually it was untill it wasn't.❤ Comming up from that quicksand and deep dark hole is a miracle in its self. The universe had a different plan for me and I'm so grateful and appreciate the love and peace that I know now. Clarity is a word I don't say lightly. Peace and love you all beautiful souls out there. Keep on keeping on your amazing which ever stage your at right now in this minute you have made it love and peace to you all xx
Met both my narc X husband & narc fake girl friend in church.
2 different churches, different years.... & both narcs approached & started talking to me. Years invested in both... only to lead me to this channel.
My lesson to learn & MOVING ON! 🌈 🎀😘
I feel you on this one The narcs are all around beware
@lela888
Yes they are everywhere & looking to take advantage of good natured as well as vulnerable people.
They are all about dominance & control.
So glad to have gained the wisdom....I can identify them clearly now!
Take good care
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I was in the same boat came to Texas met my kids daddy didn't know what I got myself into I knew he was a different type of man about money,cars, love to dress, stay in the club shift blame for his child support and made me help paid for what his kids momma did to him I met my ex-husband narc through working at the state facility and I told how my kids daddy was doing not wanting to married me, neglect me stay in the clubs not paying me any attention well they all grow-up together went to school together but her brother is the baby of the family so he know of him but not raise around, so she introduce me in a,sort casual way before I knew we talk hit it off fast love bomb me so much he blew my mind I left my kids daddy because I thought we had something in common we love the same music the same people he didn't finish school but I accept him, he never work, so he was on probation after I found myself doing so much for him, I love him so much but there was so many red flag from him and that family but kept fighting to be with him we even got married for 2 years but I divorce he started cheating but he cheat on me the first time he can back from the SafeP drug rehab center, with a young girl 20 and he was 49 years-old, I couldn't believe after that he got in trouble again went to prison for 3years came and did again. I knew something was wrong but I couldn't put my figure on it I knew his personality was different until his momma died last year in January 2023 2 months later discarded me for a new supply after 17 years plus throw away like trash I never Abandon him stay by his side calling me when his grandfather died, daddy pass away in 2016 he was messing with someone then but I still was there for him this time around I couldn't do anymore he cheated on me while we was married brought the woman to the momma house they both smear campaign me, after the divorce I became the side piece ex wife I was confused on all of this but this time I had nothing left to fight for spend a decade trying to get him to appreciate me favor me for trying to change to he that good woman but I lost at the end big time I waste money,time energy, and a broken heart torn to pieces for giving him the benefit of the doubt. My ex-husband narc kept his promise to the first woman he cheated with that if I was the last woman on earth he would never f!!! with me again and he mint it with all his heart I never treated him bad I never abandon him try to show him I love him and deeply care but he really despite me when stop my life to care for his momma and she never treated or would introduce me as her daughter in law all them gaslighted and future fake me and my kids like we was a charity case. I stood by him son now I paying the price for being good spending money on someone who never love me at all.😢
I’ve known at least 3 Christian narcs. Pretty common in Christianity
I'll never go through that again. In Midnight Gospel, it shows how we are shackled to narcs and how we poke each other's eyes out. I'd suggest watching this with someone if they have experienced narcissism. It's all about the journey.
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Is that a movie?
I cannot wait to become a new galvanized me🙏🙏🙏 working my way out of the trauma bond.
Sending a hug!
When you first met the narcissist...you were a person that shared something with many others...you felt like you weren't heard or seen by others in your life. You also, like many others, were unaware of this personality disorder you were about to find out about and sitting right in front of you was ONE OF THEM ready to pounce on its prey. Suddenly, you had the full attention of someone and you were soaking it in, it felt good. Unfortunately, the narc was soaking things in too, things to use against you for their benefit and to ultimately hurt you. It's a learning experience and a loss of innocence. Consider this: I read a book written by someone who went thru the same wringer we have, the author quoted that (if memory serves me correctly) " 1 in 7 people are hardwired to hurt, exploit, or destroy others." That's stunning...even if it were only 1 in 10. Now you have the awareness, be discerning with all people you meet and learn to say "no" often and to cut the cord quickly if need be.
The "1 in 7" startled me. Then, I realized all this Narc info. will come in handy with each passing day.
I feel fortunate to have come across this education and dived head first into it.
“loss of innocence” & “ it the cord quickly “
great comment thank you
🙏 you're welcome@@BeTheLight624
🙏 stay blessed@@jhavajoe3792
be discerning with all people..exactly...keeping my heart close to my vest and mouth zippered shut...no longer assuming people are honest or kind like me and watching to see if their actions and words match
Thank you Andrew!!! ❤❤❤
Yeah I'm a different person than before the Narcissist. I'm like a cat aware of human evil
Thank you!❤🍃🦋🍃
Welcome 😌😌🙏
there was not one time we were out of town or on vacation that I did not "upset him"I always did something wrong. looking back every birthday I was wrong about something and I remember every birthday of mine I was left apologizing. in the beginning it was awesome, rubbing my back, feet... then later he said things like oh yeh I did that when you were nice to me and that is no more.
All that internalized insecurity was unloaded on you. Beneath that Mask is a weak person. Traveling with a Narc is sometimes a good test. They are in unfamiliar territory
and you'll find out quickly their inability to just enjoy and flow -it becomes the opposite. Yuck! I've experienced that and was always puzzled with those Vacation Killers.
@jhavajoe3792 Happened to me in san Diego a few months ago, she flew all the way out just to nit pick and point out every error.
Same- he used to shower me with back and foot rubs, trips… but he always got mad at me every trip for SOMETHING… and itcended with no physical contact whatsoever I felt like Mrs. Roper just trying to give a hug only to be winced at…
Thank you for another great and helpful video, Andrew 🙏✨🌈
It’s almost 2 months post-breakup & no contact that it’s all making more sense. I was brought up in a narcissistic household. My dad is covert and my mum has enabled it and invalidated my emotions and my experiences greatly.
They have always set me up for failure. I’ve known in the back of my head for a while, but it’s all becoming clearer why it has always been this way.
Good luck to everyone else on their journeys and their healing 🙏🤞❤️✨🌈
Putting it mildly, "Our parents had issues." They sent you ( myself as well ) out into the world psychologically and emotionally "de-clawed."
It's OK, Now We Know and the rest is self- preservation. With this wisdom, Narcs will have a hell of time should they try any game, from any angle. Knowing about them was the 1st major step.
@@jhavajoe3792Wise words as always, Joe 🙏 Thank you ☺️✨
The more we know the less damage they can do. 💪👏
I was young, and I was vulnerable. Back then, I only saw good in people. I wanted to be in a couple. Grateful to be solo now at this age.
God bless you A. and tribe. Stay safe and well.♥️
Better late than never!❤
@@emilywilson7308oh yes, Em, better late than never.❣️
You are extremely appreciated my brother
I feel that my dna has been altered by my narc. I choose to believe that it’s a good thing and that it was meant to be. I am a better version of me now. To all the flying monkeys I left behind with my narc they would disagree because I can no longer be played. I’m not as soft, loving or trusting as I was. Thank goodness! If I ever do love again I will not do it with my whole heart. I will forever keep the most precious parts of me private. As much as I love being an empath, I do feel that it is also a curse. I struggle with that everyday. How could I love so fully and be hurt so terribly. Never ever want to experience that again. 25 years with him at least taught me that much.
You nailed this, Andrew.. I could write a book... Talk about layers to peell back. You are so right.. Definitely did not know what I was up against.
At first.
Introduction.... A lot of my responses through text were the letter k.. About seven months in. Prior to that talk about adoration texts.. Unbelievable.
Thank you for your content, Andrew. It's certainly taught me a lot.
Real talk 💯
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Thank you so much for the wisdom Andrew! Never stop creating these videos ❤❤❤🙏
Great video Andrew!!
Words could never describe how grateful I am for your help and all of the people in this community.
GLAD YOU MADE IT !!!!!!!!
Wishing everyone clarity and peace....
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Realization in therapy today.. thinking back to the early days with the narc I was in the midst of a bitter divorce/custody battle. The narc kept bringing up my ex wife which kept me in a perpetual state of anger and stress. It dawned on me today (12 years later) that this was a manipulation.. to keep my energy vibrating low so she could vibrate higher. This happened in conjunction with the love bomb- I was already addicted to her.
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🙏 My shield is up now 🛡. Not a wall 🧱 because that blocks everyone. 😁
I'm no longer kind and loving. I am very aware now.
I'm just a drop in the tsunami wave of creation
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I was confident and feeling good about myself.When I first met him.He probably never loved me.I was blind
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I met my narcissist through social media...myspace back in the days lol
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✨❤️✨ 🙂Happy Friday
Andrew, you are amazing 😊❤
Your strength is infinite 💯 Thank God There out of our lives. Now they can destroy themselves without us 🙏🏾
Great job.
What happens to the children in these broken relationships ,that's the real tragedy
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Chess: good analogy
When I met the narcissist, i had just lost my father. My ex discarded me a couple of months ago after 5 years at Christmas time. He too, left me sick broke and facing eviction. My sons wife died in January leaving two small children. His response was to cut off power and heat because I went no contact. Now he wants money? He holds the lease in his name and can have me evicted anytime. Still trying to get out.
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About of narcassists hide their true intentions under the guise of polyamory. My partner would say she was looking for someone for us but she was looking for my replacement. Certain relationship structures make it harder to spot a narcassist. She never cared how I felt tho. She’s the worst person I’ve ever met and somehow I still can’t beat the thought of her not being in my life. I’ve never been loved my entire life and I’m 47
Hang in there, God loves you
We were discarded the same year 🤦🏽♀️
I am 4 of those. My counselor told me, she had you pegged from the very beginning. She was right.
I got chaught in my weakest time,, after a big loss,,I didn’t listen to my gut feelings,, they talked very loud and clear,, but my need for love and care was so intense,, that’s where he could crawl in,, that was the crack he could get inside my heart!!! Now I know this! I learned so much about this,, now I see,, and take care and listen to my gut!! Thx Andrew your channel gave me the wisdom to heal! And to trust me again!
Thank you, Andrew for this interesting video with all the examples you shared tonight! Namaste. 🙏 ❤️
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Stay strong fam
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The narc is only interested in the novelty of the chase. Once they snag you, the relationship often moves at light speed and is very physical. Not long after that, novelty also wears off, and they're back to baiting, catching, and switching. Don't take the bate. Be very analytical about whom you let into your personal space
Fabulous video..yes who I was when I met him...a widow..relocated...new in group...didnt know about covert narc at all..but now almost a year post discard and educated...I am strong..happy..reclaiming my joys..art..skiing..many new adventures..embodied educated empath..grateful for every drop of wisdom from this channel and all the coaching from Andrew that has helped me grow..galvanize..and move into third version...love this video because who i was then and who I am now is worth the price of admission to the house of horrors of the narc show...take the tools and apply...never give up..persist and put the light in you on yourself whole heartedly...Namaste and deep bows of gratitude..the journey continues informed and new.
Thank you for sharing this empowering message..😌🙏🙌💯
I had no place to go, he was the best option for free stay in exchange for work in the garden. I just wanted some change of environment, peace and quiet, but he took me on his rollercoaster love bombing future faking road. After 7 weeks (also with a past full of narcissistic abuse) I was totally drained and in panic mode, then he discarded me. Totally broke. While we had a lot of fun, he still had to destroy it/me. Smear campagne followed in a very small village. I knew something was off but couldn't get to my own thoughts due to the fog.
Andrew. I appreciate all your videos but this is the best one yet. At least for me. You hit it out of the park. ⚾️
Thank you..😌🙌🙏
I finally realized I’m exactly what my dad said I was. Before this last discarding I thought to myself my dad always said I was a good wife but all I’d ever want in life wasn’t a husband but some guy to send a paycheck. He said I couldn’t love people. So, now I’m done cuz all I have is a paycheck until he decides not to send money. My dad was right
Thank you, Andrew.
Welcome 😌💯🙏
I think I wanted a relationship to the point that I ignored some significant red flags. 🚩🚩
I am so glad you made it Andrew ❤ God bless you❤😊
OMG I was a 16 year old girl when I met him in 1984. And I'm still with him.🙏
Double Bless You Andrew.❤🌿🙏🌿
Her rage fits came in a form of depression and woo is me bs !
Keep doing what you’re doing Andrew . Your personal experience and advice has helped many people, and I am sure has also helped you in your own personal healing process. I find that sharing my personal experiences with other victims of Narcissistic abuse helps me on my healing journey 🙏
Well done Andrew. I'm so glad I found your videos.
Thank you for confirming the reality and I am not crazy. Out now, healing and transforming. Your videos provide the understanding. Greatly appreciated.
March 31st...your rebirth day is my birthday ❤ going to check out that video, wondering what kind of abuse did i get for present back then 🤔 never again ☀️🌻
Beautifully said
Bravo Andrew ❤
Great vid thankyou.
They are throwing baits with very weak reasoning. I am not stopping here Andrew, it is all the way to the finish line. I consider myself lucky to have found friends who really cared.
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From the outside to the uneducated they can seem so confident , funny and charming , not to mention impressively knowledgeable !! It's all part of their game !
Im watching my narc husband just excited bc he thinks im going to sell some real estate i inherited. Hes dreaming of his vacation hes taking by himself. Its funny to watch. He thinks he has it made spending my money. Im using the cash for divorce.
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Ha I'm first... I love you everyday. I can't hear it enough. Are you a new widow?
I have to wonder when I get pushed and pushed I have rages but it takes a slow build up. Now I'm working on boundaries like crazy. Thanks for your valuable insight
I thought i've had to change the game of chess that hasn't changed in millennia. whenever the queen lands on a spot that color that spot comes off the chess board so only the queen that took that spot can use it.
I left the narc dr Sam Vit something. He's a narcissist that educates deep dish. You're ice cream. But I have to have your encouragement every day.
I'm so empathic I can't be around people because I'm too sensitive to toxicity.
The negativity is double downed because I do it to myself.
He tried to tell me he's the empath when he's stole so much monet
I'm a magnet too, Catherine
Mine did the same tried to tell me he was an empath. What a joke! Then later on tells me he was diagnosed NPD and APD . I had no clue.
I would like to rise above thecplace Im now in post Narcissit !!
Vulnerable, Hiding ,dull & boring !!! Quite ,Im actually attractive vibrant person,!!
I've more work on bringing
My sexy back !!! There's always another Narcissit out there !!
Im free ,want to celebrate
The person I am now ,
Yes this was a great video
From a person not afraid to show his strength & beauty .
It does take time, I think over six months in only interact with good friends, isolating and focusing on me. Today I don’t feel that dark and the disturbing energy hanging over my head disappeared. People that see me often told me: You look different today. You look good! Yeah! 💃🏻That inner Peace is back 🙏 Thank You Andrew my North Star! You Rock big time! ⭐ Namaste 🙏
Hi Andrew, it's done..... I don't know how to feel. Life brought tough challenges on Sunday, we were set up by local sheriff's, targeting us because I went to the hospital. With an issue, I was taken out of the exam room and had county accommodations for two full days. Narcs make you strong, the worst part was the food!!! Oh my gosh, I drank a lot of water! It was a nightmare. We finally found a detective today willing to help and took two felons and dropped our charges. The deputy knew we had our divorce coming up and did what they could to interfere. Absolutely disgusted with the sheriff's dept in Florida, nationally known hard arse sheriff. It could have been worse, I take meds you need to wean off of, got me on a smaller med watch unit for possible reaction to certain prescriptions. I did great with no coffee, I thought head aches for sure. So we go to the judge together and he stood there and found HIS STORY was what he was going by!!! You're not supposed to ask? only answer. I asked him, the judge if he was serious, he was blowing my mind, he let this man get OVER on him. My bond was lowered?.only $500, but I was STILL THE DANG VICTIM. This is the same part of us being set up. Strangely sent us to divorce court, somewhat unified over the injustice of that deputy. I'm so glad someone is finally listening in that area. I am the dang target by all. I will have a separate meeting with the detective to show med dates and events that coincide, making things impossible, but when the boys in blue flash badges, someone else sadly pays the victim price. I AM A NEWLY SINGLE SURVIVOR!!!!
Don’t give up yourself 💪 I pray and meditate everyday with my morning coffee, that is my routine that works for me. When not sure what to do? Do nothing then I cannot be wrong. I bounce things off trusted friends before I act. I take control of my destiny. First thing first. Praying for you 🙏❤💐keep watching Andrew videos. Knowledge is power 👏Peace is priceless
The most maddening thing about my past is I can see in hindsight that I actively disliked every single one of my girlfriends when I first met them, but came to like them over time. At the time I - thanks to the indoctrination of romantic comedies, doubtless mostly written by narcissists in the entertainment industry - romanticised our “coming together against the odds”, but it was actually just them building a new mask tailored to me.
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Love always ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️🐑🥰
Thanks Andrew!
I was just getting better from a bad sickness,and he actually helped me then,but now it’s All About Him😎
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Thank you andrew what an amazing job you have been doing 💯 Steve from londond still with you as from the begining
I’m dealing with a covert narcissistic mother. First I felt lost after hurtful, hidden and subtle verbal attacks from her. Now after getting myself together and doing my homework, by learning and teaching myself about all the different narcissistic behaviours, I feel empowered and strong to go no contact. Now she has to deal with me and the new situation, not I with her! Sad but true!
When I was younger, I thought most people did have people's best interests and I looked for the good in people. I knew their were some bad people out there but I thought there was more good then bad. I had to learn the hard way but I'm glad that I learned.
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