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HOW TO TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE | RELATIONSHIPS, SCHOOL, CAREER & MORE
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 13 ม.ค. 2015
- Hi guys, today I wanted to do a video which was perfect for the new year, for those o fyou looking to change and take control of your life here are some tips that I have to do just that. I'm not an expert but I am passionate about change. Please feel free to share in the comments x
Check out the book that inspired this video Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway
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This was so inspiring. Sometimes all we have to motivate ourselves IS ourself. No one else is going to get out there and do stuff for us. Family can be very criticising, friends can be skeptic, most won't believe in you until you start to believe in yourself. Taking control of your life yourself is probably the best and only way to improve your life. Love you Pat!
PATRICIA YOU NEED TO WRITE A BOOK. You're so inspiring and your videos have genuinely amazing advice. I'd for sure buy it!
Thanks :) I'd love to write one day, keep you eyes out xx
Patricia Bright I'm going to be the first one to buy it :) x
She did!!
The irony
I'm afraid that I won't be successful, I'm afraid that I won't be happy. That all the people around me are doing great and I'm not. I feel like I'm going in circles, my life is not where it needs to be and every time I tell myself it's time to take control I somehow end up back here.
I'm kinda of embarrassed to type this but I'm honestly scared of everything. It sucks because I haven't don't anything in life that I have really wanted to do because of fear. Right now I'm working at a job I don't like instead of taking action and having faith my hopes and dreams will come true. I really want to be a professional photographer and travel. I also want to have my own blog and TH-cam channel to inspire people and I really love video production. I want to learn Japanese and live in japan and so much more but my fears of what if it doesn't work and I'm not good enough have either kept me from starting to do or have made me just give up all together. I really want 2015 to be different and a year to remember because I have been doing this for sooooo long I just really want to try something different. Thank you Patricia for making this video and I'm probably gonna watch it everyday as a daily reminder...keep these video coming
One of the biggest fears I have right now is not succeeding in my University Degree. Finding it so difficult to concentrate on my assignments and get motivated to do them which is making me even more fearful. But thanks to you Patricia, I will keep reminding myself that I can do it and I will eventually succeed! I absolutely love these kinds of videos, you're so inspiring! Lots of Love xo
it happens to the best of us, you'll be fine!
Thanks :)
I used to be like that in Uni and I graduated in 2014. All you need to do it's looking at your capability and with me I also prayed and it helped me a lot.
Thanks :) Prayer really does help a lot :)
I'm a final year student at uni too. I've actually checked out this video for these very purposes… If I'm writing an assignment I get myself pumped by watching a motivational youtube video, the ones with movie quotes really do it for me and I get pushed to work throughout the whole day. You've just gotta find a source of motivation to actually GET YOU STARTED.. once you're in the zone I doubt you'll struggle at all. and PRAYER, definitely!!! You can do it !!
This applies to me completely. I'm basically scared of getting a job. I feel like I won't be able to handle it and don't want to embarrass myself or let people down. I really need to adopt that 'I'll handle it approach'. I really want 2015 to be a great year. Thanks for the video xx
Update: I bought the book and have found it really helpful! I am starting a temporary job next week while I apply for permanent jobs. I think the book is really great at giving you the push to do things you're afraid of and also helping you to think more positively about everything :). Definitely recommend
You are so inspirational pat. I have a big exam in few months to get to uni... and i have been procrastinating so much and now you made me take the exam book and read it. Its really boring book but i have to achieve my goal to get to my dream job. Being pharmacist is what i wanten for a long time now . Thank you for inspiring me.
Short term sacrifice for long term vision, do it! xx
Lol i am going to uni next year aswell to do pharmacy, we need to get studying but helloooo procrastination
Same, had offers to go to uni this autumn, had great AS results but for some reason this year my pace has slowed down dramatically. We have to keep in mind the expression we want to have on results day! Keep going!!
***** A2 is known to be causing that, it slows everyone down. I remember I found A2 the hardest, especially around December/ January.. but you gotta quickly snap out of the mindset and remember to make it worth your struggle :) Good luck x
tulible thank you for the motivation. im gonna keep motivating myself to pick up the books x
I fear that all my hard work and determination, will never be appreciated. My dad will never be proud no matter what. I fear that one day I will lose hope in my dreams and ambitions because he says I can't make it.
Sorry to hear that, try to make your goal to be proud of yourself firstly, we cannot control the opinions of others, even those closest to us. Hope you keep going , x
Thanks Patricia, this means alot. All the best to you too.
Dissenation within family is bad enough...but never lose your faith and hope in your own self, always keep in mind that you are the strongest rock, you are the only person you have to satisfy and the only person that you can rely on - this way you save yourself from tons and tons of disappointment. Keep going!
You are right, it's all a mental game, I will try to continue and achieve. Much appreciated honestly. All the best .
hoodz a Keep your head up. Just remember you have another "Father" looking out for you as well. GOD... (hugs).
May god bless you. God only knows how much you've helped me. Please continue these motivational videos. 😘
So happy about this :)
Added to my playlist. I need to watch this once a week. I feel like I have so much to offer but I always back away from doing things that scare me because I'm not confident enough. Great video xo
I am 33... I tried several times before...but learning to drive and ACTUALLY going on a road with cars around me as I drive...scares me. I want to learn THIS year and drive this year...because I am married now with a toddler and newborn and I NEED to learn...
Soooo petrified though....(gah...now I am embarrassed for writing this)
It's ok, I can't drive either!!
Dubem Agu me too...
You can do it!
I remember my dad trying to teach me and I got so frustrated and started crying. I had already bought my car but it just sat on the drive. In the end, dad started using the car.
Well months later, I decided enough was enough. I pushed myself and I can't lie to you even after I passed my test I was a little terrified to drive on the roads alone.. especially in London.. the drivers are so quick and sometimes aggressive.
However 8 years later.. :) I'm one of those drivers lol.
Like I said, You can do it.
I just recently finished my driving lessons and was really scared to drive as well! I feel that practice is the only way to truly get over your fear! You just have to go for it and think about how much easier things will be for you and your toddler once you can drive :) keep the end goal in mind and just do it. Believe me, once you practice more and more you'll feel more comfortable and confident. And think about just how many people in this world can drive, if they can do it so can you!!
*slight correction: you whole family, not just your toddler :)
Being a high school student, I am constantly scared of failure. I often panic about large assignments or stress, which then causes me to procrastinate doing them/studying for them because I don't want to deal with the stress. This video honestly helped me because it made me think about how if I don't do anything, I'm not going to go anywhere in life and I will fail. This was pretty much like a much-needed "get your shit together" pep talk for me. :)
Omg I needed this today thank you so much. I'm trying to be more open with my friends and strangers this year. That is my biggest goal.
Do it! What's the worst that will happen? Those who matter won't mind, and those who mind, won't matter! x
I'm 19 and I'm currently living with my parents in a non-English speaking country and I've been meaning to study in Canada for the past year but I'm not getting the support for my family and I believe that if you're not getting support that you need, financially, emotionally or whatever, I don't think you can acheive anything. But I still haven't given up, I have passion for education and my parents are very aware of that but they're not willing to help. And tbh I am a bit nervous about not getting accepted, but first I'll have to persuade my parents. This was very helpful, Thanks Pat.x
I think we all definitely need to see videos like this more often! Sometimes, people really do need a motivational talk and I think you're gifted with that ability to do that with people. I'm glad that you've made some time to conduct this video as i'm sure a lot of people are willing to make changes in their lives and were not sure how to go about it until they watched this video! Thank you! x
I wish I realized my power at 21. I didn’t believe in myself and had no confidence. Life swayed me in a direction so off course that I am now totally lost. I had no goals for myself and truly didn’t think I was capable of anything. I moved in with a BF at 23 and was taken advantage of financially by his family. I knew I could do more, be more, and have more on my own, but I stayed because I felt the boring life we had together was the best I could have. I wasn’t even truly passionate about him, but I didn’t think I could ever be with the man of my dreams.
I finally ended the relationship, but now I’m having to do all the inner work that I failed to do my while I was with him. It’s like I didn’t know I could love myself on my own and solely relied on his love and validation. I reeked of insecurity and for whatever reason he was attracted to that version of me which made it very difficult to change.
I've been struggling a lot lately and this video really hits the theme of how I've been feeling. I graduated in November and even with my 2.1 I'm stuck in a retail job I hate while my peers from university and my boyfriend all have amazing jobs in their line of industry. No matter how hard I try I keep getting rejection after rejection but this video has inspired me to keep trying and keep looking for work, so thank you :)
Yes! Finally! Patricia, you are speaking my language!!! This is exactly the kind of video that I need to watch! I am currently in a situation where I have been at my job for over 10 years, but lately, particularly within the last 6 months, I have began to feel undervalued, unappreciated and taken advantage of!! I haven't enjoyed my job at all, and although I work really hard, I don't seem to reap the benefits of it! The atmosphere at work has changed so much, that last year alone in my office, we lost 4 members of staff, one of whom walked out in her lunch break after being there for only 7 months!!! In our head office alone, 3 people quit due to colleagues that they didn't get on with. People's attitudes have changed, it's not a nice environment to be in, and so I made the decision 6 months ago to finally start looking for another job, with better pay and a chance to make something of myself! I'm really hoping that 2015 will be my year and I will currently leave the nightmare that I'm in at the moment! It's going to be very hard to say goodbye to my friends, likewise there are going to be people I will be definitely glad to see the back of! It's such a shame because this has been a part of my life for so long but, if something isn't making you happy, you have a choice whether to carry on or do something about it!! Thank you so much for uploading this, this is exactly what I needed!!!
Literally I'm dealing with this right now!! God is everywhere giving me wisdom this is the 3rd sign/ word I've received about the things I'm dealing with. Thanks Patricia! You have no idea the way God uses you.
The title alone made me click the 'like' bottom, because it is so easy to get sidetracked in life. You have to make a conscious effort to take control and stay in control of your life. Great video Patricia. I think it would be awesome if you were to talk in greater detail about relationship, school, career, etc.
Thank you. One of the things I struggle with is doing what makes me feel comfortable rather than what is right for me. I've realized that doing something that is right for me has helped me grow stronger and happier. Thanks for the advice!!!!
That book is really amazing the "I'll handle it" statement has helped me push through fear over the past few years. Also I really like that she said that every time you are growing or doing something you've never done before you will experience some form of fear so you can just observe it and persist anyways. Great vid
I love this video! And I agree with many of the points but for me and maybe others, it's not necessarily my own issues that are holding me back but the hatred that other people have towards me. When you're beaten down year after year for several years -- you just give up. It's too hard to be positive every damn day when literally everyone around wants to see you broken.
Patricia, I just wanted to send you some love because you really are an inspiration. I've been watching your channel for a few years now and I love that you are a no nonsense kind of girl and your not just all about doing beauty tutorials but you're super real and honest as well. you're such a great role model and really have been someone that I look up to, from one 20 something to another!
You have a gift of sharing and uplifting people and please continue to use it. God has given you that talent and it is really making an impact on other people. so thank you. thank you for inspiring me to be a better person, to be better with money, to work out, etc. I wanted to let you know that you're fantastic and please keep it up! :) also, I'd love to see you vlog more - they're the best.
anyways, lots of love from Toronto, Canada and keep being a gem!💕
I have a fear of never being good enough... It's a battle I always have within myself and I HATE IT!! But this has truly helped me out a lot!! You always help me feel soo much better within myself x thankyou so much for these peach, mean the world to me!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
I can really relate to this topic. I have many fears that I have been working through. They are not easy and there is this constant threat of failing when facing my fears. However, I know it is important for me to realize that failure happens all the time and regardless of not wanting to experience failure, it's going to happen anyway. That is way it is do hard to admit, because I always viewed failure as a sign of weakness, just like crying. It has taken me 27 years to realize that it's not a sign of weakness, but growth. I'm planning to take your recommendation on this self-help book and read it. I'm sure there's a lot of growing I still have to do, until I can better control my doubts and fears.
My biggest fear since 2013 is not to realize my dreams. My father was my hero,my best friend,since he passed i've really lost my motivation in life. Am a pharmacy student,and i remember the passion i started my career,but now,i just do everything just for the sake of doing it. Listen to ur motivational videos always encourage me,because u remember me of how i was,i was strong and determinated. I hope to adjust my self and return to my real me. Thanks Pat for helping!
That's so true. If we don't step out of our comfort zone, can't handle the slightest sacrifice and aren't brave enough to take any action, we won't ever get anywhere. We have to embrace the sheers of ups and downs in our life, get back up when we fall or fail. Writing things down could help a lot, I agree with you.
I find your video so inspirational, Patty. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us, they are really helpful. Wish you all the best and the brightest days to come! =)
I just quit my "REAL" job and now I'm scared shitless!!! lol well its the whole how am I gonna pay for this life I have occurred. I quit because its a job I never wanted but took because of money...now I want to venture out and discover my passions. On the side I work on an internet Radio Show and I want to take acting classes... I pray I will be able to do both full-time...well it looks like I will be doing them both seeing as how in 6 months I will be jobless lol Take care and thank you for your videos! Love you PAT.
Brittany Daniel how are you doing now? Just wondering cause I recently gave up my job too. I'm far from doing what I want since I don't know yet what it is what I want.
Thanks a lot for all these advices Patricia!
And never forget guys,we maybe dont choose where we come from BUT we always choose where we are going!!! So keep(or try to)smiling,be positive and spread love! 👍💗
My biggest fear is to fail again and disappoint my parents who are paying so much money for my education abroad. I just learned a few days ago that I failed an exam to get into my university journalism program that I really really wanted to participate in! I cried so hard and now I beat myself up about it everyday. I act like everything is okay, with a smile on my face but I'm feeling horrible inside. This video really inspired me to get up from this and start a new admission for autumn 2015. I will study harder and fight to be accepted in the program, because journalism is what I want to pursue. Another fear is to approach and talk to others. I really want be more open and meet new people in school, this year, so I will try my hardest to do so. Thank you so much Pat for your advice and motivation!
This year I want to be able to admire and appreciate someone else's beauty without questioning my own.
Ok, so theoretically I'm a very squash my fears and justdoit kinda girl. When I want something, I will go after it. The problem I have is I don't know what I want. Everytime I get really close to achieving my goals, I just get this intense fear that my goals are meaningless and will not satisfy me. Or that its 'Too Late' and I will fail anyway. So I end up sabotaging myself (usually by ignoring my responsabilities). I mean, I do alright but this nowhere near my full potential. But since I'm so unsure about what I want, it's hard for me to put my full heart in things. Like idk I'm terrified that one day I will wake up and find that all of my life was an unsatifying "I almost did that but my crippling self-doubt and existentialism kicked in". I really envy people who are passionate about something. God gave me so much determination but no passion lol.
I've never said to any blogger or TH-cam that I love them. Patricia I love you. This is the video I needed specially for the beginning of this year where we start to make changes and we get to the point where we feel lazy and procrastinate away and not focus on our objectives. Loved your advice. Thank you😘
Honestly Patricia this video has come at exactly the right time. I really have felt like I was just "riding the wave" and just becoming overwhelmed by things that were happening that I didn't plan for. I'm doing my first year of A-Levels and I'm planning to get my first job, as well as organising for a few friends and I to go to a really important concert later this year and I have been so stressed because I wasn't in control of as things as much as I thought I was or initially intended to be. But your tips have really kind of awakened me to be firm and actually handle things. This could be the best year of my life, thanks to your tips :) I actually teared up just realising how perfect the timing of this video was. Thank you for all that you do, from the bottom of my heart
I really needed to see this video at this point in my life. I am not sure how I even ended up seeing this video but I am so thankful at this moment. I have lost 42 pounds over the past 2 years and I am constantly beating myself up because my progress was not quicker. I have also just gotten out of an almost 3 year relationship with someone I gave my all, and he gave nothing back. I am also a second year University student starting in the fall and I want to get my GPA up even higher. I have just been beating myself u lately and this video was such a blessing for me in my life right now.
I absolutely love your chat videos they're so empowering! I find myself getting anxious about not meeting the expectations I set for myself. This happens on a weekly basis with appointments and being punctual and prepared enough for things I attend. Aswell as it being on a bigger scale of actually needing to remove myself from early stages of a potential relationship that could have been been amazing and being so under confident to even explain it. I did this for fear of not being good enough, and no matter how much I understand that these concerns are in my head and others don't see the lacking I see in myself I have struggled this last year with accepting this and trying to change my thought process. I'm now extremely conscious of the thoughts in my head and for anyone who feels like they're having an ongoing personal struggle of any kind I'd recommend 'The Power Of Now', it's an insightful read! Patricia these talks are so so helpful and empowering I love your recommendations! What are people's thoughts on fear of misjudgment and having people even close friends that think that they know you better than you know yourself, I struggle with this because that misjudgment and dictating type of 'advice' makes me too uncomfortable. Thoughts?? Xx
you're one of those comfort youtubers that one can go to when they're feeling down and stuff. i've only just kicked the ad of this vid bc i saw it and i was like "woah that's something i really need to know" and it helped me a lot! keep being awesome.
Seriously you are so inspiring!!! I really want to work hard this year and you've made me realise that it is all in my hands and it's up to me to "handle it" and take control!!! The way you should consider doing motivational speaking is unreal 😭
My biggest fear at the moment is not finding a job I love. I recently graduated and finding an interesting job and being accepted somewhere has been a lot harder than I expected. I am determined to find an amazing place to work and to give my all and I do believe something right will come across my path but at the same time I often find myself in a state of doubt and fear. I don't want people to look down on what I do or be disappointed in what I end up choosing to do. At the end of the day, I know it's my life and I should do what I feel is right and what makes me happy but it's part of my personality to take others' opinions into consideration. Thank you for making this video! It feels good to get my fear out there and read what others are going through. Knowing I'm not the only one and witnessing where your positivity and determination has brought you and so many other successful people really keeps me going.
I love this video, it's very soothing to hear all this !!! I suffer from so many things that make my life miserable and unpleasant to go through (Low self-esteem/self-confidence, social anxiety disorder, depression,...) I do go to University and have a few acquaintances, however I have no friends, no boyfriend and the idea to have a job, working with people frightens me to a point I cannot describe and it really seems like there is no way out ; the possibility of overcoming all this issues I have seem unreachable but I am going to try and listen to all these good pieces of advice in the video and try and make a change !!!
Thanks patricia! Vacation is good for you, you're looking so radiant and your smile is making me smile! Just wanted to say your videos have been saving me during my exam break, when i need a break from studying your videos lift up my spirits :)
I always look forward to your motivational inspirational talks. You're a wise girl of such young age. This came at the right time as I am feeling quite down at this moment. I ended "2014" with my car getting caught on fire while driving & started "2015" with my purse being stolen. Besides of how I started the year, this year I really want to get finish school, move to a warmer climate, meditate, travel & transverse my bad days to challenging them. As well as to trust in God more
Wow, u really opened my eye Patricia! My fears or challenges more will be my freedom to do more stuff, my motivation to work harder on schoolwork and self-esteem and just get fit. For the 1st one, is basically being able to do more things with my friends such as going to basketball games and football games or the movies. My mom always says no before I even explain and when I do explain that I'm just going with my girlfriends she still says no and gives me no reason. And when I make a new friend I can't do anything will then cuz she doesn't know them. But the thing is my mom doesn't take the time to get to know my friends. She only knows 2 of them and always says that oh if that person is going then you can go, but the thing she doesn't understand is they have their own friends. They aren't worried about me or really making an effort to hangout. So when I make a new friend, I would like to be able to go to SCHOOL events with them or the movies. Tbh, I'm starting to feel really claustrophobic and like I can't do anything without my mom looking over my shoulder. And I'm a pretty good kid, I don't do drugs or anything and I get As and Bs not like the other kids at my school. 2nd challenge, I haven't been working as hard as I did in school, which really makes me sad cuz I feel like I'm doing everything I can and it doesn't seem good enough. I had a GPA of 3.85 last year and now I have a GPA of 3.57. I just really makes me sad, I dunno if I'm just stoping and giving up or just being lazy. My other friends make it seem so easy. Last challenge, at times I feel pretty okay about my body like when I was doing field hockey but lately since the season has been over, I've had no motivation to run or stay fit. I dunno if it because I'm out of season and when I'm not doing something relating to the sport, I have no passion. Field hockey season was the best time ever! I was getting better at the sport and were surrounded but my team! And probably now that I don't have those people as close cuz we're not in season, I've lost the thrive to be like them and to be super fit. There was kinda like an obligation to run a mile everyday, I was doing a sport and I wanted to be with my friends, so I ran. Also I wanted to get better that was why I did what I did. I got through those tough days because even that's it felt like shit I wanted to feel like shit with my friends lol and to get better. And a lot of people say I've gotten skinner but since the season ended, I've lost that passion and don't know how to get it back. I'm thinking of playing club for field hockey but that's in summer and I wanna make a change now before I get back to being how I was, which was fat and lazy. Thanks so much Patricia! I think I'm actually gonna start writing because I feel a lot better!
I am on my third and final go at passing my law exams. I had a chance to see and review my paper and was shocked and petrified that I was 2% off the pass mark.... seeing that paper still haunts me to this day, so close and yet so far. The fear of failing keeps me awake most nights, the thought of having to tell people,mostly my family that I have not succeeded is what haunts me the most. I'm at my table right now balls deep in criminal law...not sure where I'm finding the strength. Something tells me it'll all be ok though...I'm clinging on to the thought that 'this too shall pass'. Btw...you guys sharing your fears have given me the courage to comment on here. Patricia, thanks for the amazing advice as always. xoxo
Thanks a lot!!! I am in my 2nd year in Law school in France and right now I am depressed because I just messed up my exams for the first semeste so I just feel bad and stressed... But I Have to do a good job for my 2nd semester, NO I must succeed and you just gave me even more strength to move on and fight because Life goes on and I will overcome my fears! I'll handle my Life and make a change! #ILovePatricia
Wow this chat seriously hit home, its so true that what we tend to fear really isn't worth fearing. Like how bad can something really turn out? What is the actual worst thing that can happen? It's not that bad!! Thanks so much for the advice, I know it will really help me out in the near future xx
Thanks Patricia I NEEDED to hear this! I've been in such a comfortable rut with my life and relationship for the past 6 months and have put all of my goals and passions on the back burner but no more! Time to get back on track and your works have definitely inspired me to step out of my comfort zone, reflect on my life and address the many issues I've let spiral out of control. Thank you so very much!!
Patricia, I love that you're sharing this info. That book has been in my collection for 5-6 years, it's such a great gift and it can really get the momentum going in anyone's life.
I really enjoyed this video Patricia and I feel we all needed to hear it! I recently read a quote that said "only dead fish go with the flow". It's a bit dramatic but totally reflects what you say - we are all captains of our own destiny. I hope that everyone who makes a choice to create change in 2015 finds the courage and resources to do so. Thanks again!
This woman is so wise ! The more I look at her videos the more I like her .
Oh, Patrica, you are such an inspiration! this video has been a wake up call for me right know. I have fallen out of my workout routine pretty badly and haven't been feeling motivated enough to pick it up and keep pushing. I know this video is from last year but I'm so glad I found it today (Sunday) so that i can start my week properly, full on motivated and with my mind and body fixed in my goals. Thank you so much! I love watching your videos and I always get an important message or reminder that helps me get motivated and active about improving certain areas of my life. Sending so much love to you! 💕
I felt like you saw what was young on in my life and we're giving me advise personally! I just finished high school and naturally I thought I was gonna get into the course that I've always wanted to do for the as long as I can remember but yesterday I got an e,all from the university saying that there were no more spaces left and I didn't get in. This shocked me and obviously I cried because I saw/still see no happy ending with this outcome, and the funny thing is, it's not even that popular of a course and I had done everything right! Got exceptional marks and met all the requirements, I guess that's why I'm so sad because it wasn't to do with me and I did do everything right. I'm really scared of what to do now because I don't know whether to take a gap year and do some part time work/ or short course or to try and wing it by doing health science this year and try and transfer into my course the year after which is not guaranteed. I feel like I have to make a huge life altering decision in such a short period of time and that really and truly scares me.
Thank you for being so inspiring and making this video! I been dealing with depression and anxiety, mostly social anxiety, for years and I'm only 20 years old. Its gotten in the way with my schooling, work, my friendships, my relationships, etc. I know I need help, I know I need to make changes but doing so is so terrifying but watching this I know I need to make 2015 the year I take charge and get out of my comfort zone and on to greatness. :)
I am less interested in fashion then I am interested in just hearing you talking. You are so motivating at first place, inspirational and positive! Ι just love to have a cup of tea and put your video just to add some positivness in my life.. You are doing a great job, congratulations!
I'm afraid of not being successful and not being able to pay back my study loan in the future. Right now I'm also very afraid of not doing as well as I'm expecting in the finals :| You are so great!!! I'm gonna have a different mind set from now on, thank you Patricia for the inspiring words ♥ Love, Oona
I freaking love you patricia, I feel so energised after this video! You're such a ray of sunshine, your friends must adore you
Thank you for this video Patricia, this has really been on my heart recently, that just because you feel anxious you don't have to act on that feeling. It's all about stepping out and trying things, because you don't know if it's going to be bad until you try it first and push past the fear. Because most of the time, like you said things aren't as bad as we anticipate :) your videos are so on point and empowering x
OMG Patricia!!! This video has almost made me cry!! Thank you so much for sharing these precious advices and with such enthusiasm and passion!! This is exactly what i decided to do for this new year. A big challenge but... If we want to enjoy every moment of our life, we have to do that! Thanks again! Blessings!
Thanks for continuing to spread positivity, light, and love!
OH! MY God! Patricia you are officially my soulmate ! Girl! i just saw the title and i was thinking about that book! and i saw it in your hands 2 sec after! wooow !
That book changed my life, it helped me so muuuch through the hardest period of my life! A must-read-book! My quote now is : WHATEVER WILL HAPPEN,I WILL HANDLE IT!!!
yasss my life is a hot mess rn, thanks girl you have the best advice! please do more videos like this please xxx
How do you stay empowered?
That's how I feel Patricia, I definitely need to make a change career wise. I worked so hard for 4 years at uni to be a teacher but at the end of it all the job market in the North West is appalling (there's virtually nothing for my specialist subject ever advertised) and I have spent the last 4 years doing badly paid supply teaching and being treated like rubbish by employment agencies. I would have moved but my hubby has a full time job here so it's not that simple. I've really had enough and I'm looking to change careers-probably back to office/ customer service work, which is what I was doing before. I was actually earning more in my previous jobs and me and my husband are desperate to get on the property ladder, which isn't going to happen until I have a permanent contract. Plus we want kids and my job is stopping that as well because I'm not in a stable place. It's got to the point were I've been in tears over it several times because it's what I wanted to do with my life and I worked so hard. But at the end of the day I can't put my whole life on hold just in case the job market picks up x
I have been a subscriber for more than 2 years now and i never commented.
Here is why i decided to do it today :
I'm a 27 years old girl with a successful carrier, a loving and caring husband for 1 year and half who i love and i know he loves me. I HAVE EVERYTHING i need and every reason to be happy BUT ... Im battleling overweight, i eat to compensate every time i see something sad, people dying etc.
I just take a moment as you suggested it and thought about my BIGGEST fear in life and its to lose my husband (in term of passing out).
I know its sad but i never in my life think about why this fear, i wrote it down, my mom calls me and i paused the video. She asked what i was doing and when i told her that i wrote my fear and i told her what it was about, she just replied "maybe its because i lost your dad when you where 7, you think that the same will happen to you but i dont work like that ....."
I never made any correlation but your words just made me think about it and i definitely going to talk about it in order to "get help" not as a depressive because i'm not depressed at all but i definitely want to understand and put that fear down because it is ruining my life.
Soooo thank you!!! (sorry to every reader because i'm french so my english isn't very good. I wish i could express better how i feel right now but i tried)
ps : you are a blessing.
Love from paris.
I really loved this & really needed this. I believe a huge thing has been getting over my fear of disappointing loved ones & making a fool of myself in general. I know we all say "i don't care" in our generation but sometimes we do. Thanks so much for this & keep them coming! :)
I prefer your 'Girl problems' series than your make up videos. You are so good with motivational speaking!! I watch these videos before I start my day and your words get in the right mood for a productive day :) Don't stop making these types of videos!!!
Thank you! I recently started a youtube channel after 5 years of being in fear and having no confidence at all! This really boosted me and made me feel even more proud of what im doing! Thank you
Hi Patricia, thank you for your inspirational words. My biggest fear these days is not having any job security. My current company is struggling. I could go and look for another job but no matter what I find, it will not fulfill me because my dream is to be a full-time writer. It is something I can do if I move in with my mother or sister in the beginning, but my mom is retired and would love the company. I can use this time at my job to save and grow my business. I have been growing it slowly for about fifteen years! I know, it's time right? I have all the practical steps, I just need to get past the fear and work hard. It is possible in 2015!
It looks like you already know the answer in your heart! So do you!
You are one of my greatest inspirations Patricia! Your vids are so comfortable and it always feels like were in the same place because of the jokes you make! This vid has just pushed me even more to make things happen! I came up with a little slogan for myself which is "I Can't BUT I Can" - soon enough this will be used everywhere -(blogs, videos,pictures) due to the fact you are able to inspire and thats what I would love to do too! Thank you!
I absolutely LOVE! How you still upload videos when you're on holiday ❤️ it shows so much dedication because you don't have to, it's the fact that you want to❤️❤️❤️ LOVE YOUR VIDEOS PATRICIA!
Just decided to look at some of your vlogs from early last year and found this one... this is why I love you, you speak to the heart... a year later this amazing vlog is still quite fresh and pertinent in February of 2016!
There are so many things that go on in my life that I can not handle. I am not Olivia Pope, and it is in those times I trust in God to handle it as only He can. This year...God has got This!
This has really hit home. I'm in the process of a career change which is super scary after doing something for tens yrs. Thanks for the tips and encouragement.
I needed to hear this right now perfect timing girl I was having a bit of a doubt butterflies and fears about something major that I have to take care of. I am now convinced that this was a message to me just confirming that I need to just do it without hesitation to move forward. Thank you.
More motivational videos please. You have no idea how much this video helped me with my current situation. Thanks Patricia you truly are an inspiration to people :)
I'm afraid of the unknown and embarrassment and whether I will be able to handle them both. Im scared of change. But your tips have helped me so thank you!
Patricia, you are such an inspiration to me and to so many other people. Every time I watch one of your videos, it motivates me to be a BETTER me. Thank you so much for sharing your presence with us! You are a appreciated! Stay blessed xo!
I fear failure in my life. its so hard to stay positive at times no matter how hard I try. I also have a hard time ignoring that voice in my head that tells me you can't do it. I hope that I can take control soon ..
Hi allll I LOVE YOU PATRICIA! Umm i've been having a lot of my problems with people I used to call me friends and now I've just been lonely and I have this awful feeling that the few friends I have now will leave just like the others and then i'll feel worse than just lonely. Love you all and hope this year is good to you all! xx
I have struggled with my weight my whole life I hav always said to myself tomorrow I'll start to work out
Now I have stopped thinking and started to take steps to loose weight thank you very much for this
I'm scared of driving, I did 10hrs a few years ago but really didn't like it, think I'm going to try a bit harder and shut that voice away saying I can't do it, Love your talk Tuesday's as well as your other videos, your a very inspirational women to look up to :) Zoe x
My fear is being a stereo typical Black American Female. Meaning that I try not to voice my opinion so much to wear I can get judged, or I will hold back on my personality, another fear I have is putting myself first because, I don't want to be looked at as selfish but I have learned that it's selfish not to take of your self first, so this year im trying to better understand myself and fix as much as I can cause I want to be happy.
You're such an inspiration, watching your motivational video's has helped me fight my demons and actually achieve a lot of things I never believed I ever could achieve. Stay blessed. X
Thanks for the advice! Sometimes it's hard to get everything done but your advice is always powerful and poignant!
I just love watching your inspirational vids! You are so REAL here on TH-cam! I'm transitioning with a lot of these areas right now and really needed this. I told myself this is MY year too! We appreciate the value you're giving us!
Thank you so much for inspiring me everyday. My fear stems from communicating with people. I guess you could say that I have trust issues to a certain extent. This results in my constantly pushing people away and not always being myself. This video really inspired me to try to let people in. It would be great if you could make a video on something to do with this issue because although I've realised that I want to do something about it, I don't exactly know how. And I think it would be really beneficial as I know that a lot of people have this problem to a certain extent. Whether it is that they become shy or not true to themselves when it comes to others. Thank you so much for all you have done. Love you xx
To make this year the best ever, I will stop thinking I'm not good enough and gain some more confidence! At least I'll try my hardest. My selfesteem is so bad that I can start crying at anytime for feeling bad or not good enough.. :( thank you Patricia for this video❤️
HI, Ingrid... Wanted to let you know that I have been exactly where you are.... I felt so bad about myself, the way I looked, everything really..... You will get through this!! I did and so can you.... One of the biggest things that helped me was using a journal. I wrote down my fears but also my successes. I also used a gratitude journal. This really helped me put things into perspective. You have a lot to be thankful for! I prayed a lot as well. Meditation helps too and challenging myself to go out and do things (i.e. going to a movie alone) also helped, it gave me a sence of power and accomplishment. I just want you to know that you are not alone and you will get through this trial in your life. You are beautiful and you are DEFINITELY good enough!!! You WILL GET THROUGH THIS!!!! Also, don't be afraid to cry sometimes. Tears cleanse the soul.
Your hair looks gorgeous, and thank you so much for this helpful video 😘
Patricia's hair is too lush
I love love love your motivational videos, I find them so inspiring. I'm a little bit shy and there are soo many things i want to do but I always shy away from them but recently I've jut been saying yes to a lot more things and just stepping out of my comfort zone and I have realised 9/10 I never regret going for it. I know I've come a long way personally and videos like this just give me that little reminder that i need now and again to keep going!!
Omg thank you soooo much for making/posting this video. I always enjoy and look forward to your inspirational one on one type vlogs and it's almost like you make this one to match exactly what's going on in my life. This video literally brought tears to my eyes but in a good way though. I started this year off really strong trying to eliminate all negative things and generally all the things that just didn't belong in my life and in this whole mix there was a guy involved and I'm currently struggling to learn and be able to let him go. He and I are in two different places and it just hurts letting go but I know that I deserve better. I'm working on making this year my year. I'm always so selfless and it's time to really work on me. Thank you so much Patricia, whether or not you see this message in all of the comments please know that I consider you to be such an inspiration (: thank you!
I love these talking videos. They really make me think about my own self reflection and desire to do even better! Thanks Pat x
Really enjoyed this video. Thank you Patricia!! Well, I fear failure. I am always worrying about the consequences before my actions. I tried to be this good girl( not that I am a bad girl) so everyone else approve of me but at the end of the day I am not happy. I am stuck btw becoming the woman God destine me to be, what my parents wants me to be (African Parent) and what I really enjoy doing.
I dont understand everything what you say because i'm from Poland and I still learn english but when i watching your videos I feel positive energy. You seem sooo nice and happy person :D
Thank you so much for always aiming to inspire Patricia! I am a college senior and am trying to figure out post grad plans I am applying to some internships but ultimately I want to spend my gap year in the UK because I visited as a sophomore and fell in love with London. One of my fears is that I can't make my hopes and dreams reality so I will take these words to heart and make sure I accomplish my goals!
Thank you so much for this video. This year I will turn 25 and I feel that I haven't gotten much done for myself in terms of being a fully independent adult. I want a car and to live in my own and this is the year to do so! I wrote down some of your tips especially on self reflection and will incorporate those into my everyday life.😄
Thank you so much Patty I loved this video. I just realized what you say is true...fear isnt going to away...I have to make the change and step out of my comfort zone in order to live the life I really want to live. You are so inspirational and really boosted my confidence thank you for everything you really made my day.This is my year and I am going to achieve most of my goals :)
Something that has held me back for a really long time is my anxiety. I get fearful of being around too many people, I cant be a in a class full with people, I dont know where or what I want to be at 19 years old and all of these issues have seriously brought me into a depressed state . I have never worked in my life. I always try to be positive and look at everything I have been blessed with but I feel like I'm not a normal girl. I feel so different and misunderstood in this world. These are all problems that I would like to fix but I don't even know where to begin. ....
Face your anxiety. Look it in the eye and say "you cannot control my life anymore. You're prevention be from moving forward in life, and I can't have that anymore." Just like Patricia said, what's the worst thing that can happen if you stay in that room full of people or go out and get that job? People will judge. It's a part of life, and there's nothing you can do about it. But you can choose the way you can react to it.
I think that sometime, before you can move forward, you need to look back. And you need to look back, to find out why you have social anxiety, and then start out slow, you can take a friend that you trust with, or a family. But you have to do something, find a way, that can calm you down, or but you mind somewhere else. And it is normal not knowing what you want to be a 19 years old, you can always start out, buy making a list about things you love in you life, or love to do, and try and see if there is a job opportunity in that. To feel different, is not always a bad thing, it just mean you are aware that you not complete the same as everybody else around you. Maybe you just haven't found the people in you life, thats gonna make you feel normal, ands thats okay, because it will come with time.
I wouldn't really recommend 'just facing your fear' depending on the severity of anxiety you might feel worse and end up on the verge of a panic attack. Although you might know what boundaries you have and how best you can push them reasonably. If you've suffered with this for quite a while (i.e several weeks/months/years etc), I would probably look into non-clinical methods first. This could include meditation so that you can learn how to centre your thoughts or writing how you are feeling can also help as over time you get to recognize patterns in your behaviour and any 'triggers'. Also, try slowly being comfortable talking to people, perhaps have a goal of saying 1 or 2 sentences a day to someone, or whatever you can manage and increase it daily. This would help make you more accustomed to people as an anxious person tends to be on high alert and subconsciously views people as threatening which is why you might experience heart racing, sweaty palms etc. Your body is essentially preparing for a fight, so you might have to start 'training' it to be relaxed around people.
If you are suffering quite severely, it might be best to speak to your GP and see what they can do. They could either refer you to a psychologist or suggest medication like Sertraline (which is also found in grapefruit!) this often alleviates anxiety and depressive symptoms. Trust me, your mental health can not be put on the back burner, this anxiety that you have could be a chemical imbalance or deep issues that your have in your subconscious that needs to be solved. It would help talking to people, sites like blah therapy and 7 Cups of Tea (you can speak to trained listeners for free anonymously :~)) as it prevents your feelings from being bottled up. Its really important your anxiety gets worked on as it can affect performance in education and work when you find one, but also for your own happiness.
Its okay if you don't know what you want to do as a career or in life, this is your time to volunteer (great for our CV) and see which things you like doing. Research, career quizzes etc. Essentially, ask yourself 'What do I value?' 'What are my skills?' 'What skills am I interested in learning' 'What would make me happy at the end of a work day ? Knowing that I helped an individual? A group? A company? Increased sales? etc. Remember you're 19, your 20s are gonna be filled with discovering who you are, what your boundaries are, making mistakes (not intentionally mind you) and learning from them. All your worries or your situation right now is only temporary, there is help out there and you are not the only one feeling this way. :). January isn't over yet!
Sorry for the long post, I just recently finished a module on abnormal psychology and had lots to say ~
sophiademure DkzBlackBlondi Dubem Agu Thank you ladies . Reading this right now brought tears to my eyes. I was afraid to put this post up in fear that someone would take it as a joke. But.I am considering talking to someone about my issues and i do need to take some time where i self reflect on everything that has happened in my life. Again , thank you for your positive energy !!!
sophiademure Yes. This is great advice. I think Patricia's advice is general advice, not medical meant for potentially quite serious emotional issues that require medical input. I have difficulties with anxiety and videos like this, in addition to therapy, are helpful.
Thanks for your advices Patricia, currently i going through a lot of anxiety because of school.
I want to fill a form which will allow me to go study in Canada in the Bishop Uni ( I 'm a student in France). But i fear that i won't succeed and be able to understand the courses in english, so sometimes i say to myself that i should fill a form for a Uni in Quebec where all the lessons are in french.
However i have good grades in english and i make sure that every day i listen to english to improve myself.
If some of you guys can help me to clear my mind, i will be delighted :)
Ce que tu as écris déjà me semble bien rédigé et compréhensible. Pour te motiver mon cousin vient de revenir de New York où il y a passé 2 semaines et il s'en est bien sorti il m'a dit qu'il s'était fait plein d'amis à Chinatown. Bref, tout ça pour te dire qu'avec les deux mots d'anglais qu'il connait il a parfaitement réussi à communiquer. Je sais que ce n'est pas la même chose que de suivre des cours en anglais mais c'est juste un exemple pour te montrer que la barrière de la langue n'est pas infranchissable. Si tu décides d'y aller (j'espère pour toi, parce que ce serait une super expérience) eh bien les mots que tu pourrais ne pas comprendre, en les notant phonétiquement sur ton cahier pour trouver la signification plus tard, tu ne devrais pas avoir de soucis. Surtout que c' est pris en charge par ton école (c'est Erasmus), du coup tu ne seras pas laissée à l'abandon so just go for it ;)
C'était long haha mais j'espère que tu n'abandonneras pas, il faut poursuivre ses rêves, sinon on ne vit pas vraiment. xoxo
Anissa Abasse Je pense que je vais tenter ma chance dans cette université, j'ai envoyé un mail à ma prof d'anglais pour qu'elle me donne des conseils et son avis. Je suis contente pour ton cousin il a du vivre une super expérience à New York :).
Le truc c'est que j'hésite trop et tout le temps, faut que je prenne confiance en moi (l'objectif de ma vie hahaha en somme car j'ai toujours la peur ne pas réussir) et que je saute le pas.
Merci beaucoup pour ta réponse Anissa, ça me rassure :) xoxo
Lili Je t'en prie, ravie de savoir que ça a pu t'aider :). Tu as fais le premier pas déjà, c'est tout à ton honneur !
C'est pareil, je donne des conseils qu'il faut que j'applique moi aussi. J'espère que ça se passera bien en tout cas. Tiens-moi au courant ;)
As someone who is Canadian I can honestly say that you will be fine. Don't worry about language barriers, you'll be in Quebec and most people will speak french at shops and Us Uni students aren't so bad so I'm sure you'll make friends quickly. As far as lecturers and professors go, if you don't understand something you can always go ask they are there to help. Maybe ask the other students if you can set up study groups to make it all easier for all of you to study. Have fun with it, and don't worry about making mistakes and sounding like a fool. No one is born perfect at a language. Everyone learns. Just have fun, try not to miss your loved ones too much, try Poutine, bring a good winter coat and boots and you'll be fine. Good luck! And I hope you have all the best experiences. 😄
Go for your english is good don't be afraid to take a step you Will be fine. Tout ira bien
This is exactly what i needed, going through a rough patch where i am quite confused. I love these types of videos patricia they help me so much☺️
This year I finally stopped investing time & my heart in an undeserving guy and treating him as a priority when I was only an option to him. I plan to travel more and actually live life instead of just existing day-to-day