It’s funny when people complain about woke propaganda in movies, because they’re partially right, but movies have always been propaganda. It’s just not their propaganda now. The so-called feminism in them is mostly corporate pseudo-feminist performative BS, though, so it makes it extremely difficult to take to people about real feminism.
I LOLed so hard when dudes went “See, this is how you’re being inclusive without being woke!” two years ago with Top Gun 2…yes, you had Payback and Fanboy and Warlock and Hondo (and a bunch of diverse tech crew). But they were supporting characters. With the exception of Phoenix, the weighty heroic characters were still yte dudes: Maverick, Bradley, Hangman, Cyclone, Iceman, Bob.
I'm beginning to question whether to consume anything written by dudes at this point. These people are so far removed from authentic human experience that even "slice of life" can be written off as sheer lunacy.
Thank you! Somebody finally validated how much I DESPISE this movie. I'm old enough to have seen this when it came out in theatres. My friends were all: "how romantic!." Bleurghhhhh!. Every time I tell anyone how much I hate this movie they look at me like I'm crazy because "Oh.....it's a love story!." NO! It's a patriarchy story.
I have a different take on why the Laura Linney storyline is tragic and anti-feminist. The movie establishes early on that she's had a crush on this coworker for YEARS and has been too nervous to make a move. When he finally takes the initiative, she's thrilled. But she's so stuck in her caregiver role (for her brother, another man) that she won't let herself live her own life. Her brother lives in a home. He's not in an unsafe position; he's calling her multiple times a day for emotional support, which is fine except that she has conditioned herself to drop literally everything to provide that support. Because women exist as bottomless nurturing wells for men and can't have fun if a man needs that nurturing. She absolutely could have called him back another time and provided the support he wanted when she was available.
I used to wonder why I didn't like romance movies and now I totally get it. They aren't romantic they are horror movies. The movie Overboard is particularly horrific in my opinion.
Wow I watched this movie yesterday for the first time in ten years or so, and I couldn’t believe how awful it was. You can really see the casual sex culture that was being pushed heavily in the early 00’s, emphasis on threesomes (obviously one man and lots of women only). The constant theme of how if you’re single you’re sad, and if you’re single at Christmas well you’re a total failure. Very uncomfortable watch.
Confirmation: 80s baby here. My persistent idealism and naiveté and resultant disaster of a love life was not my fault. It was movie programming all along. I resisted it in some ways, but now I understand my inability to advocate for myself in relationships. Because of movies like this, I wasn't conditioned to.
Yep. Being a young woman (with absent parents) in the 00s you were conditioned to be something between a „I’m not like other girls and cool with anime 🦑🌽“ sm3+y Katy Perry pick me and Natalie Portman in Garden State: Gone Girl’s „Cool Girl“ speech encompassed it perfectly, arguably for the first time (in 2012/14!), which is why it’s become such a classic. 2004’s Mariah Carey was apparently fat. Dudes had been saying on TV in the 90s (when you were 12) how a teenaged Kate Moss was so appealing to men and no one was around to challenge that! And if you had somehow not managed to h00k up with a horrible Zach Braff loser type eight years your senior and „saved him“ by the time you were 23, pop-culture ensured you were deeply ashamed. I was literally 4B a LONG way into my thirties and carried shame every day around being an “old v1rg1n“. But looking back, I see that despite all the 🧠washing the conditioning didn’t fully work - because I was never ashamed enough to get with someone I didn’t actually want touching me.
Can you a deep dive on the American Pie movies and Revenge of the Nerds films? I hated those as a woman and yet they were heavily pushed as classics when I was a teen.
It's interesting to re-watch these movies with a different lens. I watched it when it first came out and liked it, but with more years and more experience it's hard to ignore the blatant misogyny in this movie, and so many romantic comedies. It's literally a once you see it, it can't be unseen situation, and it's everywhere. Except the problem is that many women still idolize these narratives, and that's unfortunate because it's all to benefit men in the end and has nothing to do with honest, respectful and equitable relationships.
Regarding the Portuguese cleaner storyline... The two of them literally never had a conversation, because of the language barrier. Yet he proposes to her and she accepts - based on what knowledge of each other?! He wants her because she's a pretty object, not because he knows anything about her as a human being. And she accepts out of some scarcely concealed British colonial fantasy: because she's a poor Portuguese girl from a poor, backward country and marrying a British guy ("Prince William") means marrying up.
I had an ex who loved this movie (ended up being a narcissist, shocker). He tried to show it to me. I maybe lasted ten minutes and told him I couldn't watch it. Blegh.
I never watched it until I was in my 30s either-- after hearing people gush about how it's "so romantic" and their favorite holiday movie, I decided to give it a watch. The whole time I was cringing or rolling my eyes. At the end I said "wow, this is Terrible, Actually."
I still haven't overcome the fact that Bridget Jones is supposed to be seen as fat and a failure. Watching that movie now she has my dream life. Single, beautiful and own apartment. We grew up with this kind of movie but luckily we turned out to be aware of the BS fed to us.
Though Bridget jones is meant to be an unreliable narrator. Most of the things are just in her head, it’s like the exaggerated things and insecurities you write in your diary
Thank you for this. I absolutely hated the movie too. So pretentious. We know reality is awful, at least don't normalize cheating and abhorrent lustful behavior. Don't romanticize it. The Alan Rickman and Emma Thompson storyline is triggering for me too. I was harassed at work by a married father of 2 teenage daughters and I know that young women pursuing affairs with older married men are rare. Instead of showing him for the lustful old crow that he is, living conveniently with his "sweet wife and family" all the while lusting after a young woman at work and using her (as he does his wife of course, but he is afraid of losing the sure thing), they show us a villain w***e that cannot resist his (nonexistent) charms. And then, the wife, afraid of being alone and single again, is like a typical doormat: "Just don't do it again". 🙄🙄🤮🤮🤮
I've noticed that in movies, there are a lot of men who in real life would stand no chance, dating women way above their value, yet in these 2000s films, they always inexplicably felt drawn to their average-ness. Your comment reminded me of that.
THANK YOOOOOU!! I particularly appreciate criticism of Love Actually because i have absolutely LOATHED that extremely problematic movie since it came out over 20 years ago. I am genuinely BAFFLED when people say its their favorite movie.
I don't think I've ever sat through the entirety of this movie, but whenever I watched parts of it here and there, I was always confused about how this movie was supposed to be romantic. It was depressing like 70% of the time 😂
Keira Knightley said recently they had to do multiple takes because she was looking at him like she was creeped out instead of flattered. She pointed out that IRL she was only 17 when she filmed it and she did think it was incredibly creepy.
What bothers me that his side girl acted like she is this evil woman who chased after him but in reality often the married men is chasing after his coworkers. Happened to me multiple times and other women who I knew. They have a pregnant woman or just a baby with a woman at home and chasing after every skirt at home to find one stupid one who fall for his flirts how beautiful she is. Again. Have seen it multiple times.
The entirely healthy and slender secretary character being treated like she was an elephant the whole time completely messed up my body image for years.
@@Raven.MadnessI cannot with this "visual" take, I cannot It's just such a gross statement to express how people a just objects for you to look at. We are not a furniture to be authenticly pleasing. If I hear one more man saying this bs I will fight him.
@@FishareFriendsNotFood972 I always hated that story line bc she was absolutely gorgeous and there was nothing wrong with her body. People were just aholes! Ugh
These movies that portray the situation as the woman being the aggressor when there is a younger woman employee with her older boss are just them rewriting the story of Lot. All the women know that Lot was not too drunk to know he was sleeping with his own daughters but that story gives all the molesters cover to be demons and have the women at church call the girls "fast tail".
This movie came out like 20 years ago and people just didn't really notice the problematic issues in movies like this one. I watched it with my family and we enjoyed it, but didn't look too deeply into it. Considering I grew up with a misogynistic father, that makes sense. I've watched many videos analyzing it since and see the problematic areas. It's very interesting to look back at movies I grew up with and enjoyed and see the problematic areas. It's hard to reconcile what was acceptable when we grew up and what's acceptable now. Ugh
@VeeKayGreenerGrass bc his movies are also very misogynistic? I think growing up in the 80s and 90s, being constantly exposed to misogyny as acceptable, especially from my father, it never clicked to me that his movies were also troublesome. I still enjoy many of his movies. Though my favorite is The Wedding Singer, in which he doesn't come off misogynistic to me... But there are definitely troubling characters in that movie for sure. It's like I've been numbed to misogyny in media and it's hard to even recognize when it is portrayed. Videos like this definitely help me see the problems though and help me better recognize misogyny in media. I so appreciate and welcome the commentary and the dialogue it creates.
There is no any problematic issues in this movie and int the others. They are only exist in empty, washed leftist brains. Fortunately, leftists are not breeding, and Western Europe and the USA are falling. And soon (it's only a matter of time), Muslims will take over power in the UK or France. Then women will see what "prosperity" is.
I agree, I never liked this movie either and I’ve never been able to put my finger on it (I was young when i watched it). It’s awful in so many ways. It feels like a wolf in sheep’s clothing type thing. It’s all portrayed in such a sweet way but it’s actually disgusting.
Yes you are on point! Same. And it’s always women who end up alone or are punished for not being perfectly available to a man, while men cheat, are old, ugly, whatever and always have a young model type unconditionally loving him. It’s sadistic and meant to shame women into settling 😂
There's actually an explanation for the (what now just reads as) fat shaming: That actress was getting made fun of for her weight by the British tabloid media at the time just before this movie was made. Most people thought it was needlessly mean, and whoever the geniuses were behind this movie decided to lampshade the issue with constant references to her weight: it was intended to be satirical i.e. making fun of the PRESS (not the actress or the character) for such mean, unwarranted criticism. What throws the whole thing off even more (more than the fact that if you're not British and old enough you don’t get the context) is the fact that the actress lost weight for the role.
Related: A „Hänsel & Gretel“ kids‘ film was on yesterday on German TV. I had to leave; I couldn’t stand seeing the misogyny that I knew had been drummed into me as a child by that (and countless other) fairy tales.
Girl you are cracking the freaking code🎊🎊🎉🎉🎉❤️❤️❤️❤ I lovee you I knew something was wrong in my relationship, I understood he is narcissistic yet details like this make it more easy to get over it.
Proud to say I’ve never seen this film all the way through! The trailers put me off! I saw half of it at my mums who doesn’t have the internet (so your stuck with terrestrial telly). It totally confirmed my thoughts of why I didn’t want to watch it in the first place! I couldn’t believe Emma Thompsons character didn’t divorce! My jaw was on the floor!
I saw this movie in a theater on NYE 2003. The best part of the movie? When it was over and I walked out of the theater. NONE of the characters were likable and the script was garbage. It was a waste of $8.
The only lifeline I'll give them as someone who isn't from America, fat shaming like that is very normalised everywhere else. Also, America is seen as such a strange place that I did think the models in the middle of nowhere was normal. I love revisiting these movies and seeing how brainwashed I was. I was in high school thinking this was a cute movie and now I watch it and every scene is worse than the next. I love this and I hope you do more. Please do more movie reviews. Can I recommend? Bridget Jones Diary. It's amazing how much we have been pummeled with this propaganda
Omg I’m about your age and I loooooved this movie as a kid/pre-teen. I think because I was super into Harry Potter and loved Alan Rickman. Probably also because I wasn’t allowed to watch it at first. Anyway, I’m so happy you did this review!! I’m so excited to watch it again now through this lens and confront some of my oldest ingrained misogyny. Feminism level up!!
It was ....but it was supposed to show that love comes (pun intended) in all guises. The irony of this post by someone with the user name of Patrick Bateman😅😅😅😅😅😅
@ Men thinking that filming a woman and man doing it and taking over her body whilst getting s gratification is a way of showing love is beyond me because that industry is furthest away from love based Oh and i did mention my pfp on another comment, i put it when i was 15 because it was a meme then. But American psycho is a demonstration of how men see women as objects to be achieved by having s with them, and also how they crave masculine validation within themselves and each other, and how they hate or suck up to other men who are more powerful and masculine. If you remember the card exchange scene
I hate this movie. Gave me the ick. The story about Allen Rickman was too much. So gross. What a POS. That story upset me so much that I don’t remember much of the rest of the movie but I didn’t like any of the other stories but never thought too much about it. Thank you for verbalizing why the whole movie is awful!!!! I look forward to sharing this with people I know that just love this movie. Ick ick ick ick.
Yeah being fed all these rom coms when I was like 10 took a lot of unlearning. I loved them before I developed critical thinking. But we didn’t really have anything else to watch that wasn’t misogynistic, it’s a struggle even today! Also the other comment about all the grown men who still can’t accept this is all a fantasy 😬
And what's really wild is that this is *normal* British culture (yes, I live in the UK). It is so deeply ingrained in the people they don't even realise there is something wrong with it. 15 years ago, this was my favourite movie! I haven't watched it for at least a dozen years and now I am just shocked by how awful the movie actually is. Ugh!
I have a few things to say about your interpretation vs mine, while also not trying to defend the movie. I'd like to see if anyone also picked up on a few of these details. So please let me know: Laura Linney's chracter and her coworker both crushed on each other for two years. So the bedroom moment was a huge step as they both were taking a chance on "love." I always interpreted her picking up every call as making herself "too available" to her brother in the sense that it was to her detriment. She carved out no time for herself and had no boundaries in place because she feared for her brother's well-being. (Which can be common when one becomes responsible for another's care.) I am not judging people who have this experience. People do what they need to do for family. The dude was making a valid point about not picking up every call. However, it was clear to both of them that she was not willing to take this step yet or at all. To me, the silence after that was not disappointment in lack of intercourse, but rather a sad realization that her major priority is her brother at all times and that the romantic relationship that they both yearn for would always have this component. I always felt for her character. ❤
I completely agree. I think she feels no small amount of guilt as well at the idea of not being at her brother's beck and call which leads her to minimise her own needs.
Had to go look for your comment and yes, I love the last part especially!! It very much reads as "I'm sad we can't progress the relationship because I know I won't ever be a priority," not "I'm sad I can't bone this girl right now." She tells her brother twice "no, I'm not busy." She could have said "I am busy right now, but I'll call you back tomorrow. Can one of your aides help you in the meantime?" She doesn't need to completely neglect her brother now that there's a man in her life, but she also can't keep putting herself last in her own life, as so many women are expected to do.
When it came out I was so excited to see a larger woman be someone that a man was really interested in for her body. The fact that the Hugh Grant character was genuinely into a curvy woman that other people declared as "fat", was so exciting for me to see on film. I hadn't seen that represented on film yet and as a heavier person that people called fat and told me if I want to find love I'll have to lose weight, that was an exciting storyline for me. I do see your points though. It is very misogynistic. Happy holidays!
You have reminded me why I gave up on movies in the early 90's. Yeah, I don't understand pop culture references and am way out of touch but at least my anger isn't stoked continuously.
Yes! And all the 90s kids grew up with movies like this thinking this is normal human behavior 😅 And then people wonder why there is still so much sexism in people’s heads. It’s obvious where it comes from
I kind of want to watch it now, years later, to notice all of these things. But I also kind of don't want to waste my time. These movies brainwashed me for years. I think so many of these movies were written or directed by men, especially John Hughes. Films and TV were a huge part of my education about people and life because I never got so much info from real people I knew. This entertainment has shaped our culture.
Thank you!!! 🙏 Was so excited to watch for the first time a couple years ago and then completely floored that anyone likes this trash dumpster movie?! Absolutely infuriating
I heard people talking about this movie for years but since I only find about 5% of "romantic comedies" actually funny I never paid much attention. Then a couple of years back I caught it on TV and only managed to get through about 10 - 15 minutes. I think I switched over to the Peanuts Christmas special rerun.
This movie is deranged, thanks for pointing out all the foolishness! I'd love your analysis of "A Thin line between love and hate" starring Lynn Whitfield and Martin Lawrence, you would have a field day. The way men date is toxic AF.
But to be fair, Grease was made in the 70's and took place in the 50's. It has an excuse. Love, Actually was made like 30 years later and is even more backward. At least in Grease they had a woman teaching auto shop. And Grease was mostly about teenagers making bad decisions, which is realistic and kinda the point. Love, Actually is a bunch of adults making bad decisions when they should absolutely know better. Not defending Grease, but I think Love, Actually is so much worse.
Finally! Yes! Thank you for not liking this movie. I’m so tired of telling others that I thought this film was an absolute horror show. And that was before I woke up to the reality of misogyny and the patriarchy. I only saw this movie once, in theaters, & never looked at it again. All I remember is a man having a conversation with a woman while doing her doggie style for a Korn film. I was so disgusted to be watching it with other people. Am I wrong? Was that not in this film? You didn’t mention that part. What makes me sick though is that this movie is celebrated every Christmas AND women like it. The cognitive dissonance this causes in my brain when I try to accept the reality that any woman would like this movie is too painful to entertain A woman I know said she would be watching it WITH HER MOM over the holidays, because they like the movie. I couldn’t even respond. I was speechless. The fact that this movie continues to exist. The fact that it’s in the “romance” section. The fact that these women have to act out these acting roles in the film
Agree. 💯 I’ve never liked this film. Where I disagree: disabled people are not a “burden”, nor is caring for disabled people a “burden”. Disabled people have every right to the support and care they need to survive and thrive as individuals, as do we all. What’s “burdensome” about disability: ableism, and all the ways in which it limits accessibility and negatively impacts quality of life for disabled people. Which often results in disabled people and their carers (where applicable) having very limited resources and opportunities. That, I can agree, is a “burden” for all involved.
Thank you for watching this so I didn't have to. I cannot fathom how this is so many people's favorite Christmas movie. I've always hurled at the thought of watching it.
BTW-Remember the closing credits song 🎶🎵? The Beach Boys "God Only Knows" The men that made this film decided to ‘fess up”, tell-the-truth/shame-the-Devil. Frankly, how WOULD men cope without women doing ALL the unappreciated, unpaid mental, social, and physical labour in these so-called “wonderfully romantic and loving relationships". Uh-huh.
Patrick! Shoo! Go work out at your nice white home gym! 😂 (Nah American Psycho was directed by a woman and the book was by a gay man so it's all good. As far as I'm concerned it is mostly a parody of the excesses of wealth and privilege of a man who is chasing feeling something by committing to the most extreme power chasing possible, because he might be afraid of his latent homosexuality, because he is hyper focused on performing "normal toxic 80s masculinity." To the point of killing people to self soothe.)
It's horrible. Yes, awful. Regardless of what decade you watched it. Morality doesn't just evolve like a linear arrow. A lot of people KNEW things were wrong historically, and still did it. Just like people do now.
It was a few years after the Lewinsky thing, so the prime minister and the hot secretary storyline is the more romantic version on that... Hey Lisa I recommend a movie to u then, watch that if u wanna climb up the wall: it's called The Secretary with Maggie Gillenthal and James Spader, from 2002.
I used to loveeee Secretary as a late teen because of Maggie Gyllenhall's and James Spader's performances. But wow, so many power imbalances, lack of consent, and major crossing of boundaries in general. I love that we can reflect on this now as a group.
I tried to like it, I tried to convince myself that I should like it, but I could not unsee the guys taking advantage of a woman due to a difference in power. Plus the dude who returns with 3 models from the US made me roll my eyes so hard. Not funny, not cute. This film is not for women.
It’s funny when people complain about woke propaganda in movies, because they’re partially right, but movies have always been propaganda. It’s just not their propaganda now. The so-called feminism in them is mostly corporate pseudo-feminist performative BS, though, so it makes it extremely difficult to take to people about real feminism.
spot on!!! 😭💯
Yeah, people talking about the Barbie movie like it was some feminist revelation gave me a headache.
@@anthill1510 Same. I thought, well, it’s got maybe a couple of good lines and that’s it.
If they can't take pseudo-feminism, they definitivitely will hate deep dives in feminist theory and narratives.
I LOLed so hard when dudes went “See, this is how you’re being inclusive without being woke!” two years ago with Top Gun 2…yes, you had Payback and Fanboy and Warlock and Hondo (and a bunch of diverse tech crew). But they were supporting characters. With the exception of Phoenix, the weighty heroic characters were still yte dudes: Maverick, Bradley, Hangman, Cyclone, Iceman, Bob.
I'm beginning to question whether to consume anything written by dudes at this point. These people are so far removed from authentic human experience that even "slice of life" can be written off as sheer lunacy.
Thank you! Somebody finally validated how much I DESPISE this movie. I'm old enough to have seen this when it came out in theatres. My friends were all: "how romantic!." Bleurghhhhh!. Every time I tell anyone how much I hate this movie they look at me like I'm crazy because "Oh.....it's a love story!." NO! It's a patriarchy story.
I have a different take on why the Laura Linney storyline is tragic and anti-feminist. The movie establishes early on that she's had a crush on this coworker for YEARS and has been too nervous to make a move. When he finally takes the initiative, she's thrilled. But she's so stuck in her caregiver role (for her brother, another man) that she won't let herself live her own life. Her brother lives in a home. He's not in an unsafe position; he's calling her multiple times a day for emotional support, which is fine except that she has conditioned herself to drop literally everything to provide that support. Because women exist as bottomless nurturing wells for men and can't have fun if a man needs that nurturing. She absolutely could have called him back another time and provided the support he wanted when she was available.
I just made a comment similar to this. I love the additional points you made. ❤
@astrophel87 thank you!
Her story made me sad and ruined the movie for me
I used to wonder why I didn't like romance movies and now I totally get it. They aren't romantic they are horror movies. The movie Overboard is particularly horrific in my opinion.
@@GeorgeGlass298
Yeah, rewatching that film as an adult and someone with empathy. It quickly turns from romance to horror.
Wow I watched this movie yesterday for the first time in ten years or so, and I couldn’t believe how awful it was. You can really see the casual sex culture that was being pushed heavily in the early 00’s, emphasis on threesomes (obviously one man and lots of women only). The constant theme of how if you’re single you’re sad, and if you’re single at Christmas well you’re a total failure. Very uncomfortable watch.
Yes in hindsight I‘m wondering what kind of predatory man tried to convince us that this is ‚normal‘ or ‚natural‘ 😅 Scary…
Confirmation: 80s baby here. My persistent idealism and naiveté and resultant disaster of a love life was not my fault. It was movie programming all along. I resisted it in some ways, but now I understand my inability to advocate for myself in relationships. Because of movies like this, I wasn't conditioned to.
THIS... omg
Yes, couple this with the narcissism and emotional neglect from boomer parents, and what a combo for building my cptsd 😂
IRL, I was actively DISCOURAGED and CRITICISED for even TRYING to advocate for myself.
Well now . . .
Yep. Being a young woman (with absent parents) in the 00s you were conditioned to be something between a „I’m not like other girls and cool with anime 🦑🌽“ sm3+y Katy Perry pick me and Natalie Portman in Garden State: Gone Girl’s „Cool Girl“ speech encompassed it perfectly, arguably for the first time (in 2012/14!), which is why it’s become such a classic. 2004’s Mariah Carey was apparently fat. Dudes had been saying on TV in the 90s (when you were 12) how a teenaged Kate Moss was so appealing to men and no one was around to challenge that! And if you had somehow not managed to h00k up with a horrible Zach Braff loser type eight years your senior and „saved him“ by the time you were 23, pop-culture ensured you were deeply ashamed. I was literally 4B a LONG way into my thirties and carried shame every day around being an “old v1rg1n“. But looking back, I see that despite all the 🧠washing the conditioning didn’t fully work - because I was never ashamed enough to get with someone I didn’t actually want touching me.
Can you a deep dive on the American Pie movies and Revenge of the Nerds films? I hated those as a woman and yet they were heavily pushed as classics when I was a teen.
I'm starting to believe those movies are made for male audience. The redpillers are furious that women don't act like this in real life !
It's interesting to re-watch these movies with a different lens. I watched it when it first came out and liked it, but with more years and more experience it's hard to ignore the blatant misogyny in this movie, and so many romantic comedies. It's literally a once you see it, it can't be unseen situation, and it's everywhere. Except the problem is that many women still idolize these narratives, and that's unfortunate because it's all to benefit men in the end and has nothing to do with honest, respectful and equitable relationships.
I’ve come to think a lot of my internalized misogyny has come from entertainment. Movies, shows, books, music. All of it. I’m done.
Same
And from your parents
@@nataliaalfonso2662 True. And religion. We were surrounded.
Regarding the Portuguese cleaner storyline... The two of them literally never had a conversation, because of the language barrier. Yet he proposes to her and she accepts - based on what knowledge of each other?! He wants her because she's a pretty object, not because he knows anything about her as a human being. And she accepts out of some scarcely concealed British colonial fantasy: because she's a poor Portuguese girl from a poor, backward country and marrying a British guy ("Prince William") means marrying up.
How this movie is a 7.6 on imdb after all these years is beyond me…
They should change the name of this movie to: Not Love but, Brainwashing Actually. 😅
I always hated rom coms. Horror films are more realistic.😂
I'm a 63 year old man and I couldn't agree with you more, total cringe.
I had an ex who loved this movie (ended up being a narcissist, shocker). He tried to show it to me. I maybe lasted ten minutes and told him I couldn't watch it. Blegh.
I never watched it until I was in my 30s either-- after hearing people gush about how it's "so romantic" and their favorite holiday movie, I decided to give it a watch. The whole time I was cringing or rolling my eyes. At the end I said "wow, this is Terrible, Actually."
I still haven't overcome the fact that Bridget Jones is supposed to be seen as fat and a failure. Watching that movie now she has my dream life. Single, beautiful and own apartment. We grew up with this kind of movie but luckily we turned out to be aware of the BS fed to us.
Though Bridget jones is meant to be an unreliable narrator. Most of the things are just in her head, it’s like the exaggerated things and insecurities you write in your diary
Thank you for this. I absolutely hated the movie too. So pretentious. We know reality is awful, at least don't normalize cheating and abhorrent lustful behavior. Don't romanticize it.
The Alan Rickman and Emma Thompson storyline is triggering for me too. I was harassed at work by a married father of 2 teenage daughters and I know that young women pursuing affairs with older married men are rare. Instead of showing him for the lustful old crow that he is, living conveniently with his "sweet wife and family" all the while lusting after a young woman at work and using her (as he does his wife of course, but he is afraid of losing the sure thing), they show us a villain w***e that cannot resist his (nonexistent) charms.
And then, the wife, afraid of being alone and single again, is like a typical doormat: "Just don't do it again". 🙄🙄🤮🤮🤮
I've noticed that in movies, there are a lot of men who in real life would stand no chance, dating women way above their value, yet in these 2000s films, they always inexplicably felt drawn to their average-ness.
Your comment reminded me of that.
THANK YOOOOOU!! I particularly appreciate criticism of Love Actually because i have absolutely LOATHED that extremely problematic movie since it came out over 20 years ago. I am genuinely BAFFLED when people say its their favorite movie.
My boyfriend loves this movie which makes me question their beliefs surrounding romance and if they are sexist
I don't think I've ever sat through the entirety of this movie, but whenever I watched parts of it here and there, I was always confused about how this movie was supposed to be romantic. It was depressing like 70% of the time 😂
the kind of hatred that I have for this film is only eclipsed by my hatred for the film "love and basketball."
I've always read this movie as a _parody_ of a classic rom-com. Every dumb, sexist trope turned up to eleven.
Exactly. The movie is over the top ridiculous. Can't take it seriously but won't get worked up over the lousy bits either.
The man showing his friend’s wife those cards always gave me the creeps.
Keira Knightley said recently they had to do multiple takes because she was looking at him like she was creeped out instead of flattered. She pointed out that IRL she was only 17 when she filmed it and she did think it was incredibly creepy.
What bothers me that his side girl acted like she is this evil woman who chased after him but in reality often the married men is chasing after his coworkers. Happened to me multiple times and other women who I knew. They have a pregnant woman or just a baby with a woman at home and chasing after every skirt at home to find one stupid one who fall for his flirts how beautiful she is. Again. Have seen it multiple times.
Rom-coms and Holiday movies are the worst! 🤢
The entirely healthy and slender secretary character being treated like she was an elephant the whole time completely messed up my body image for years.
Men are “visual” creatures, but will gaslight a slender, healthy woman into believing she’s overweight or out of shape.
@@Raven.MadnessI cannot with this "visual" take, I cannot
It's just such a gross statement to express how people a just objects for you to look at. We are not a furniture to be authenticly pleasing. If I hear one more man saying this bs I will fight him.
@@FishareFriendsNotFood972 I always hated that story line bc she was absolutely gorgeous and there was nothing wrong with her body. People were just aholes! Ugh
The best scene will forever be Rowan Atkinsons scene where he was packing the jewelry for Alan Rickman's mistress.
Romcom brainwashing 🤮🤮🤮
yeah straight up the fact they were acting like Martine McCutcheon was fat/chubby was absolutely wild lmao.
These movies that portray the situation as the woman being the aggressor when there is a younger woman employee with her older boss are just them rewriting the story of Lot. All the women know that Lot was not too drunk to know he was sleeping with his own daughters but that story gives all the molesters cover to be demons and have the women at church call the girls "fast tail".
This movie came out like 20 years ago and people just didn't really notice the problematic issues in movies like this one. I watched it with my family and we enjoyed it, but didn't look too deeply into it. Considering I grew up with a misogynistic father, that makes sense. I've watched many videos analyzing it since and see the problematic areas. It's very interesting to look back at movies I grew up with and enjoyed and see the problematic areas. It's hard to reconcile what was acceptable when we grew up and what's acceptable now. Ugh
I remember watching but being disgusted by the Adam Sandler movies.
@VeeKayGreenerGrass bc his movies are also very misogynistic? I think growing up in the 80s and 90s, being constantly exposed to misogyny as acceptable, especially from my father, it never clicked to me that his movies were also troublesome. I still enjoy many of his movies. Though my favorite is The Wedding Singer, in which he doesn't come off misogynistic to me... But there are definitely troubling characters in that movie for sure. It's like I've been numbed to misogyny in media and it's hard to even recognize when it is portrayed. Videos like this definitely help me see the problems though and help me better recognize misogyny in media. I so appreciate and welcome the commentary and the dialogue it creates.
@@annEngrMisogyny is being a fish in water.🐠🐠🐠🐠
There is no any problematic issues in this movie and int the others. They are only exist in empty, washed leftist brains. Fortunately, leftists are not breeding, and Western Europe and the USA are falling. And soon (it's only a matter of time), Muslims will take over power in the UK or France. Then women will see what "prosperity" is.
I've always hated this movie, thank you
Emma Thompson's performance is the only reason to watch this movie. She is a queen ❤
I agree, I never liked this movie either and I’ve never been able to put my finger on it (I was young when i watched it). It’s awful in so many ways. It feels like a wolf in sheep’s clothing type thing. It’s all portrayed in such a sweet way but it’s actually disgusting.
Yes you are on point! Same. And it’s always women who end up alone or are punished for not being perfectly available to a man, while men cheat, are old, ugly, whatever and always have a young model type unconditionally loving him. It’s sadistic and meant to shame women into settling 😂
I finally watched this after years of avoiding it. Absolutely horrible. Your commentary is spot on.
It’s a horrible movie, I’ve unfortunately seen it and I’m sorry you watched it
This was the funniest takedown of this movie I've ever heard
I only watched this again recently. OMG it is a trainwreck. Revolting
My ex-fiancé loved this movie and told me to watch it 🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴. Very glad I started paying attention to the warning signs!
Fantastic review. This movie is worse than garbage. Aims for saccharine but ends up demented.
Always hated this movie. Why they do that to Emma Thompson character? Creepiest holiday / Christmas movie lol 😂
My dad did not let me watch this kinda movies when i was a child. He knew well, i appreciate him. ❤
There's actually an explanation for the (what now just reads as) fat shaming:
That actress was getting made fun of for her weight by the British tabloid media at the time just before this movie was made. Most people thought it was needlessly mean, and whoever the geniuses were behind this movie decided to lampshade the issue with constant references to her weight: it was intended to be satirical i.e. making fun of the PRESS (not the actress or the character) for such mean, unwarranted criticism.
What throws the whole thing off even more (more than the fact that if you're not British and old enough you don’t get the context) is the fact that the actress lost weight for the role.
I never knew this! Wow. Thanks!
If the actress lost weight before filming, then any satirical intent behind the body shaming lost meaning as well.
I thought so similiarly as you when I watched this and a few people told me I was unromantic...huh 🤪
I used to love this movie too. 😩 But I was an 80s kid, brainwashed by all this stuff. All these movies hit differently now.
@@MissSothePeacefulObserver same! Part of me doesn't want to ruin the nostalgia of certain movies I loved as a kid or young adult. Ugh
It hard to watch movies I used to enjoy as a kid because I feel like my eyes are open now and I don’t see things the same way
Related: A „Hänsel & Gretel“ kids‘ film was on yesterday on German TV. I had to leave; I couldn’t stand seeing the misogyny that I knew had been drummed into me as a child by that (and countless other) fairy tales.
Girl you are cracking the freaking code🎊🎊🎉🎉🎉❤️❤️❤️❤ I lovee you I knew something was wrong in my relationship, I understood he is narcissistic yet details like this make it more easy to get over it.
Proud to say I’ve never seen this film all the way through! The trailers put me off! I saw half of it at my mums who doesn’t have the internet (so your stuck with terrestrial telly). It totally confirmed my thoughts of why I didn’t want to watch it in the first place! I couldn’t believe Emma Thompsons character didn’t divorce! My jaw was on the floor!
I used to love this movie. Rewatching it, I realized it was just the 'All I Want For Christmas' scene and the nostalgia. Definition of male fantasy.
I saw this movie in a theater on NYE 2003. The best part of the movie? When it was over and I walked out of the theater. NONE of the characters were likable and the script was garbage. It was a waste of $8.
I never felt comfortable with this film. I remember my dad recommending it to me years ago, and I was like “uuuh yeah sure”.
The only lifeline I'll give them as someone who isn't from America, fat shaming like that is very normalised everywhere else. Also, America is seen as such a strange place that I did think the models in the middle of nowhere was normal. I love revisiting these movies and seeing how brainwashed I was. I was in high school thinking this was a cute movie and now I watch it and every scene is worse than the next. I love this and I hope you do more. Please do more movie reviews. Can I recommend? Bridget Jones Diary. It's amazing how much we have been pummeled with this propaganda
Fat shaming is mostly also normalized in America.
Omg I’m about your age and I loooooved this movie as a kid/pre-teen. I think because I was super into Harry Potter and loved Alan Rickman. Probably also because I wasn’t allowed to watch it at first. Anyway, I’m so happy you did this review!! I’m so excited to watch it again now through this lens and confront some of my oldest ingrained misogyny. Feminism level up!!
I've never seen this movie. Thanks for saving me watching it 😂
Also the filming corn scene was so strange
It was ....but it was supposed to show that love comes (pun intended) in all guises.
The irony of this post by someone with the user name of Patrick Bateman😅😅😅😅😅😅
@ Men thinking that filming a woman and man doing it and taking over her body whilst getting s gratification is a way of showing love is beyond me because that industry is furthest away from love based
Oh and i did mention my pfp on another comment, i put it when i was 15 because it was a meme then. But American psycho is a demonstration of how men see women as objects to be achieved by having s with them, and also how they crave masculine validation within themselves and each other, and how they hate or suck up to other men who are more powerful and masculine. If you remember the card exchange scene
I hate this movie. Gave me the ick. The story about Allen Rickman was too much. So gross. What a POS. That story upset me so much that I don’t remember much of the rest of the movie but I didn’t like any of the other stories but never thought too much about it. Thank you for verbalizing why the whole movie is awful!!!! I look forward to sharing this with people I know that just love this movie. Ick ick ick ick.
I saw this in the theater, it was the worst movie I have ever seen. I could not believe that women liked it. Incredibly gross.
Yeah being fed all these rom coms when I was like 10 took a lot of unlearning. I loved them before I developed critical thinking. But we didn’t really have anything else to watch that wasn’t misogynistic, it’s a struggle even today!
Also the other comment about all the grown men who still can’t accept this is all a fantasy 😬
And what's really wild is that this is *normal* British culture (yes, I live in the UK). It is so deeply ingrained in the people they don't even realise there is something wrong with it. 15 years ago, this was my favourite movie! I haven't watched it for at least a dozen years and now I am just shocked by how awful the movie actually is. Ugh!
I have a few things to say about your interpretation vs mine, while also not trying to defend the movie. I'd like to see if anyone also picked up on a few of these details. So please let me know:
Laura Linney's chracter and her coworker both crushed on each other for two years. So the bedroom moment was a huge step as they both were taking a chance on "love." I always interpreted her picking up every call as making herself "too available" to her brother in the sense that it was to her detriment. She carved out no time for herself and had no boundaries in place because she feared for her brother's well-being. (Which can be common when one becomes responsible for another's care.) I am not judging people who have this experience. People do what they need to do for family.
The dude was making a valid point about not picking up every call. However, it was clear to both of them that she was not willing to take this step yet or at all. To me, the silence after that was not disappointment in lack of intercourse, but rather a sad realization that her major priority is her brother at all times and that the romantic relationship that they both yearn for would always have this component.
I always felt for her character. ❤
I completely agree. I think she feels no small amount of guilt as well at the idea of not being at her brother's beck and call which leads her to minimise her own needs.
Had to go look for your comment and yes, I love the last part especially!! It very much reads as "I'm sad we can't progress the relationship because I know I won't ever be a priority," not "I'm sad I can't bone this girl right now." She tells her brother twice "no, I'm not busy." She could have said "I am busy right now, but I'll call you back tomorrow. Can one of your aides help you in the meantime?" She doesn't need to completely neglect her brother now that there's a man in her life, but she also can't keep putting herself last in her own life, as so many women are expected to do.
A guy watched with me this movie on a first date. He saw half of it when he was a child and thought it's gonna be romantic. He regretted it :))
When it came out I was so excited to see a larger woman be someone that a man was really interested in for her body. The fact that the Hugh Grant character was genuinely into a curvy woman that other people declared as "fat", was so exciting for me to see on film. I hadn't seen that represented on film yet and as a heavier person that people called fat and told me if I want to find love I'll have to lose weight, that was an exciting storyline for me. I do see your points though. It is very misogynistic. Happy holidays!
Such a terrible movie for so many reasons and not just the misogyny.
You have reminded me why I gave up on movies in the early 90's. Yeah, I don't understand pop culture references and am way out of touch but at least my anger isn't stoked continuously.
Yes! And all the 90s kids grew up with movies like this thinking this is normal human behavior 😅 And then people wonder why there is still so much sexism in people’s heads. It’s obvious where it comes from
I kind of want to watch it now, years later, to notice all of these things. But I also kind of don't want to waste my time. These movies brainwashed me for years. I think so many of these movies were written or directed by men, especially John Hughes. Films and TV were a huge part of my education about people and life because I never got so much info from real people I knew. This entertainment has shaped our culture.
Thank you!!! 🙏 Was so excited to watch for the first time a couple years ago and then completely floored that anyone likes this trash dumpster movie?! Absolutely infuriating
I heard people talking about this movie for years but since I only find about 5% of "romantic comedies" actually funny I never paid much attention. Then a couple of years back I caught it on TV and only managed to get through about 10 - 15 minutes. I think I switched over to the Peanuts Christmas special rerun.
This was one of my favorite films, and then I have started therapy sessions…. 😂
…and I agree to everything and more then you are saying here
I watched this when it came out and had a knee jerk reaction of disgust. Literally watched it once and never again.
Agree completely, also Bridgette Jones
If this is what you see ON SCREEN imagine what happens behind the scenes
Thank you, I thought I was the only one who hated this movie! It has a cult following and I don't get it.
The film was pretty forgettable. Now that you say these things, I'll make sure to never rewatch it
This movie is deranged, thanks for pointing out all the foolishness! I'd love your analysis of "A Thin line between love and hate" starring Lynn Whitfield and Martin Lawrence, you would have a field day. The way men date is toxic AF.
Yay! Someone who hates this movie as much as I do! Excellent breakdown.
I have always hated this movie because the “older” women ended up unhappy and sad
My take on this movie was the same. I don't understand what's to even like here? Even if your not American, it's offensive to all women.
Yeah, I never got this movie's popularity...but Grease is so much worse.
But to be fair, Grease was made in the 70's and took place in the 50's. It has an excuse. Love, Actually was made like 30 years later and is even more backward. At least in Grease they had a woman teaching auto shop. And Grease was mostly about teenagers making bad decisions, which is realistic and kinda the point. Love, Actually is a bunch of adults making bad decisions when they should absolutely know better. Not defending Grease, but I think Love, Actually is so much worse.
That is not an excuse. Grease shouldn't be watched @@coyotegaxiola4281
Finally! Yes! Thank you for not liking this movie. I’m so tired of telling others that I thought this film was an absolute horror show. And that was before I woke up to the reality of misogyny and the patriarchy.
I only saw this movie once, in theaters, & never looked at it again. All I remember is a man having a conversation with a woman while doing her doggie style for a Korn film. I was so disgusted to be watching it with other people. Am I wrong? Was that not in this film? You didn’t mention that part.
What makes me sick though is that this movie is celebrated every Christmas AND women like it. The cognitive dissonance this causes in my brain when I try to accept the reality that any woman would like this movie is too painful to entertain
A woman I know said she would be watching it WITH HER MOM over the holidays, because they like the movie. I couldn’t even respond. I was speechless. The fact that this movie continues to exist. The fact that it’s in the “romance” section. The fact that these women have to act out these acting roles in the film
Agree. 💯 I’ve never liked this film.
Where I disagree: disabled people are not a “burden”, nor is caring for disabled people a “burden”.
Disabled people have every right to the support and care they need to survive and thrive as individuals, as do we all.
What’s “burdensome” about disability: ableism, and all the ways in which it limits accessibility and negatively impacts quality of life for disabled people. Which often results in disabled people and their carers (where applicable) having very limited resources and opportunities. That, I can agree, is a “burden” for all involved.
To think I was recommend this film when I was looking for romance films. I dodged a nuke.
I've been hearing about how horrible the movie is since it came out. Never had any desire to watch it.
Love these movie reviews of movies I haven’t even ever seen. I’ve always hated rom coms.
If you haven’t yet, I wanna know what you think of the notebook!! I thought it was weird.
Me seeing Neeson and Mr.Bean in this movie like 😮😅😂
Thank you for watching this so I didn't have to. I cannot fathom how this is so many people's favorite Christmas movie. I've always hurled at the thought of watching it.
I cannot express enuf my HATE FOR THIS MOVIE
😂 You're hilarious. I love your videos.
Ive never put myself through this movie and never will
Now I know why I've never watched this movie. Thanks to you I never have to!
😂
BTW-Remember the closing credits song 🎶🎵?
The Beach Boys "God Only Knows"
The men that made this film decided to ‘fess up”, tell-the-truth/shame-the-Devil.
Frankly, how WOULD men cope without women doing ALL the unappreciated, unpaid mental, social, and physical labour in these so-called “wonderfully romantic and loving relationships".
Uh-huh.
thank you mother for your content and please ignore my pfp ik the film is misogynistic i set it when i was 15, but im 18 and you’ve opened my eyes
Patrick! Shoo! Go work out at your nice white home gym! 😂 (Nah American Psycho was directed by a woman and the book was by a gay man so it's all good. As far as I'm concerned it is mostly a parody of the excesses of wealth and privilege of a man who is chasing feeling something by committing to the most extreme power chasing possible, because he might be afraid of his latent homosexuality, because he is hyper focused on performing "normal toxic 80s masculinity." To the point of killing people to self soothe.)
Every film is misogynistic because they're produced by males. I'd say James Bond and Forest Gump top the most misogynist films I've watched.
Forest Gump isnt meant to be misogynistic but many males hate Jenny and don’t understand her
It's horrible. Yes, awful. Regardless of what decade you watched it. Morality doesn't just evolve like a linear arrow. A lot of people KNEW things were wrong historically, and still did it. Just like people do now.
It was a few years after the Lewinsky thing, so the prime minister and the hot secretary storyline is the more romantic version on that...
Hey Lisa I recommend a movie to u then, watch that if u wanna climb up the wall:
it's called The Secretary with Maggie Gillenthal and James Spader, from 2002.
I really liked the short story by Gaitskill. Then there was the movie that made me want to scream.
@@laurahowe5214 will look it up thanks...
I used to loveeee Secretary as a late teen because of Maggie Gyllenhall's and James Spader's performances. But wow, so many power imbalances, lack of consent, and major crossing of boundaries in general. I love that we can reflect on this now as a group.
I tried to like it, I tried to convince myself that I should like it, but I could not unsee the guys taking advantage of a woman due to a difference in power. Plus the dude who returns with 3 models from the US made me roll my eyes so hard. Not funny, not cute. This film is not for women.
Agreed, and the note card scene was creepy.
Thank you this movie is SO bad.