Hi! I've really enjoyed your two videos so far! I have a couple questions. So 1) Chloe, was it weird for you to see Kyle in this video? Was it the first time you've seen one of your alters? 2) How does each of your alters self-identify? As i've seen you've posted on like instagram and stuff that each has a gender (i could be wrong) and each has a name? Would be really interesting to know the processes of this. Love you lots and loving what you're doing! ❤️
Hey Maya! It was very odd to watch back yes, I've never seen a video of Kyle before but I've seen videos of other alters, especially littles! It's still a new experience as we are continually finding out more about each other, and for me it's definitely a little disturbing and frightening to watch your own body doing things you never would, with no memory of it happening, but it's also quite funny to see his mannerisms on my face too! Yes, every alter is essentially their own person created to contain or deal with a trauma, and as they all have different experiences they have all developed differently, on top of of course their core different aspects that were designed by the brain for a necessary purpose. Eg: protector, carer, victim, etc. Everyone has their own names that they chose or were given by abusers and chose to reclaim, and their own genders, opinions, memories, sexualities and views on others and the world :) Sometimes gender in an alter is created randomly by the brain, and sometimes an alter is created with a certain gender as a necessity. For example if a childs female body is being abused s*xually, a male alter is more likely to be created to hold those memories as they are physically more removed from the experience due to not having the same physical parts and awareness down there, helping them to deal with specialised trauma more effectively. It might help to think of it in terms of "this could never happen to me" - and so an alter is created thats as different from the body or person experiencing it as possible to hold those experiences, for example, as an alter of the opposite sex. :) Hope this helps! Please let us know if you need any more explanation on this or anything else! We love you lots too, really glad you're enjoying the channel so far! 😄✌❤ -Chloe xx
Melena Soleil Chloe likely doesn’t remember what the trauma was, which is the purpose of having alters, to protect the host from unbearable memories. And even if she did, I think it’s disrespectful to ask her to discuss it. She is being very brave and generous to share her life with us, in a quest to explain and educate about DID. What happened to her to cause the condition is not the point, and is a very private thing that is none of our business unless one of them chooses to bring it up. I hope she will continue to share her journey, as long as it is productive for her / her system, and I hope it is helpful in some way as she moves forward into a better future for herself.
iceartist22 Wow...that's EXACTLY what I was thinking...like no offense but did she/he really expect details? Ummm...talk about TRIGGERS! Yeah. No thanks. PLEASE don't go down that road Chloe & the team. 😀👍🏼BTW, first time writing...lol, "hiding" deep into the "replies" of the comments. Please call me JESSIE. Jessie
Kyle sounds like the older brother who has no idea why his little sister does any of this but supports her anyway because he loves her and is playing along to make her happy regardless😂❤️ Also thank you (all) for your bravery and sharing your experience with D.I.D with the world. I only started watching today and have binging the videos back to back because it's so interesting and fascinating. Remarkable how a brain works !!! Keep up the good work! I really do hope your channel grows more and for people to see these videos and understand.
Loving Kyle the most xD 😅 great job on your channel tho @DisociaDID 🥰 keep up the good work, you inspired me to spread awareness, about anxiety and depression, since i only have those for now, thank god
Rowen McIver Hires I don't remember most of my childhood or big chunks of my adulthood, or most of my Day to day life. I don't know how to find out if I have DID, I have a different diagnosis.
Rowen McIver Hires Same here, actually. Like the only parts I can really and truly remember are the ones without my mother in it. I also used to hear voices as a child too, but it was more creepy than anything. Thankfully, I rarely ever hear them anymore - well, with the exception of a few giggles and unpleasant phrases here and there. It’s probably just a coincidence though.
Last year I lost a friend and since then I got more depressed and lost more of my childhood memory.. I know I don't have DID.. 'cuz I don't switch.. (or I just don't know xD ) but I never had a moment where I didn't knew what happend... I think soo... now that I rethink maybe xD idk... it's weird xD
I'm in the same boat. I was diagnosed with BPD but disaasociation is my most common symptom. Each of my voices are differen people, there's a grandma whos sweet and loving her name is just granny, then there's snake who's a stone cold bitch and makes me hate myself, then there's lara who is me as a little girl and lately there's been then other one who's a little girl maybe jasmine whos really sexual and shes like 8 to 10 years old and sisters with lara. Snake is the worst but she just is hurting and angry and hates everything because she's mad.
I’m just wondering...WHO is responsible for ALL this TRAUMA in your past. SHAME ON THEM. It infuriates me when I think of a grown-ass adult doing things to or around children and the long term effects of it!!! It’s so devastating and I’m so sorry for whatever happened to you. But look at your support network. You got people in your corner now. All this “friends” you lost, they weren’t really your friends. Now you have true friends!!
@@CarolynShakshi oh okay. Can you have a trauma that you don’t really remember? Like my mother told me that when I was little I used to cry a lot. Like not cry cause of no reason like a baby does but like cause my dad would yell at me. Right now I don’t remember it though. Cause I have literally all the symptoms of DID but idk about the switching. Well, obviously I wouldn’t know about it if I didn’t even know what DID was. But I do black out sometimes and have huge memory loss gaps. I would never self diagnose like Trisha did. But I’m not sure about switching at all. A lot of times my mother tells me to do chores and I don’t even remember her asking to do them. It’s like if I switch for like 10 minutes and then I come back to myself
@@woah9599 You can absolutely have trauma without remembering it. See a doctor/therapist if you can, if you have concerns about possibly having DID or any other mental issue. Good luck!
honestly kyle is a natural behind the camera, both with the padilla interview (which got me to your channel, yes i think im about to binge you WHOLE CHANNEL) and the outro was great too!
You girls need to let Kyle make more videos without makeup and rocking his favorite masculine hat. Lol I'm having fun getting to know this system. I'm going to keep watching all your videos that are popping up on recommended. :D weeeeeeeeeeeee
we have demon alters, a priest alter, angels, because our trauma was heavily related to religion. it definitely isn't possession or supernatural, I don't understand how people can think that
I think what makes it different from entities and alters is that, entities are outside forces, and alters are strictly you. Like entities can leave or go to someone else, while alters usually just integrate or stay with you. I don't know too much about the subject, but as someone who is a spirit worker and deals with mental illnesses and disorders, it can be difficult to differentiate what is a non physical being and the act of your own mind. Channeling and possession is similar to dissociating, as you can lose time, but not every channeling is like that and can often happen where you are conscious during the channeling. But if u dont believe in that just ignore me!!!!! (':
what it thought i was going to get : a good educational video what I got : * Kyle * " YA'LL HERE ARE SOME TIPS ON MAKEUP. MAKE IT TASTY." (I totally agree tbh also thank you all for these videos. they're educational and entertaining)
Yo that shit had me dead af. The phone thingy is real as fuuuuck. The others come out for a few minutes and suddenly I don’t know where my phone is. We don’t all put our phone in the same pocket because we aren’t all right handed so sometimes we spend 10 minutes looking for our damn phone only to find out Alex came out for all of five minutes and put it in the wrong freaking pocket.
Alexandr Bohler This is why we wear hoodies because then there’s only one pocket so it doesn’t matter what side you put it in lmao We did lose our hat once when someone threw it across the room because it was too hot. Because they couldn’t just take it off lmao
Oof, all of us are right handed, but we dont all put it in the same pocket. We're meant to keep our phone in our bag for school, but most of our alter who are older than the physical body are like Yeeeeeeeeeeah, no. And so that's always fun.
3:20 I know this is an old video but I still feel a compulsive need to remind people that it isn't necessarily abuse. Any kind of trauma, if bad enough, can trigger DID if that's how a child's brain is wired, particularly repetitive trauma. Obviously the most common repetitive trauma is abuse, but this is not always so, as is the case with my trauma. Sorry. Felt the need to.
I have to agree with Kyle, haha. I'm a girl and don't wear any makeup because it smells and tastes weird. Whoever does the makeup though, it's utterly gorgeous.
Don't have DID, but I experience a lot of dissociation as a part of my late stage Lyme disease. Besides the different identities, I can relate to everything you say. Forgetting things, losing time, not feeling real. It sucks but you have to remember that your brain is working hard to make sense of the world!
I feel similarly. Idk whats going on with me but I dissociate pretty often and lose lots of time. I'm sure it's not DID because i dont switch out I just switch off. And it's not just like getting lost in thought. So I feel ya.
@@Lunabwolffang23you should watch DissociaDID's video on dissociation. Yes everyone dissociates but theres a limit to how much you can dissociate until its impacting your life. It's the same way with forgetting things. Everyone forgets, but if its interupting normal life plus you see other symptoms then its still an important symptom in diagnosis. A lot of us in these comment sections come to give our 2 cents and see if we can hear from other people but "I dont know if I believe you" isnt helpful or well-informed.
I paused the video for a while because I have to write what Kyle said: "how would you feel validated as a person when it feels like you're dreaming all the time."
Mine actually WAS demonic oppression. When Hades or Gail would come out I would literally morph into some being that wanted to eat people and drink blood. My dad's side of the family were satanists
@@fuzzypanda5300 omg I'm so sorry you experienced this, I'm french and I fought several times against these satanists networks, I hope you found a caring environment to live in !
I can tell when Its Kyle immediately. He has a very kind of laid back, low-key, less emotional persona. Kinda like, “yeah...it’s me, I’m just here chillin.” Kind of charming personality. Kyle, by far is my favorite so far(of course Next to you, Chloe💛)! But then again, I’ve only seen Jade and one other...I can’t remember.
I'm one of those skeptical folks, but sheesh... I've been binge watching these videos and this one in particular makes me a believer! The speech, facial expressions, demeanor, etc... It's fascinating to watch, but must be so damn difficult to go through daily. I give this young lady so much credit for being an absolute warrior and getting this info out there. Thank you!!
Oh those switching headaches! It's like that sinus behind the eyes feel mixed with a migraine. Like our brain is one of those squishy toys and someone has pressed it and it still has that pressure before it releases and un-squishes. All of these bring back such vivid moments in life. Like finding things that aren't yours, losing my phone (such a common sign for me that someone else has been out) not recognising people who clearly recognise us n so on. You gave some very great explanations and examples. Great video. :)
Oh man, that brings back memories - we were convinced that we were “reincarnations” for years and were in such denial of our DID. It was so good to hear you talk about your experiences, Kyle 😃 Also we’re a bit excited cause you seem to live in the UK too, lol
I never comment on anything on TH-cam, but I just HAD to say hello! I randomly came across your channel, and I must say you seem like such a genuine, beautiful soul. I can’t wait to get to know all of your other alters, and learn more about DID, for as someone who suffers with mental illnesses of other kinds, your journey really interests me. Subscribed AND looking forward to watching more! Love, from Brisbane, Australia. xx
I didn't think I would ever tell anyone about this but I just found your channel last night and I can't believe I'm not alone...The first time I realized that I had alters was when I was writing in a journal because I was going through tough times...I noticed that there would be different paragraphs of different handwriting and I was so confused and scared...then Alex spoke to me and told me that he is going to be with me through everything...I immediately looked into hearing voices and different handwriting (which there wasn't much on at the time I don't think) because this voice was unlike any other it was almost as if it sounded like my brother but in a different way....I've never written this down so now I feel stupid for sharing this....but I know I shouldn't because this is a community that I feel I can trust...well I thank anyone who reads this...be nice to yourself and others
Headaches, yes. Paracetamol and calpol doesn't help. Really bad, nearly every day no matter how much sleep or water I get. Litterally the sane as you described. Faced ALOT of trauma as a child. Don't remember much of my entire childhood. Litterally years I can't remember. I say to my mum that something happened and she says it never did. Very confusing. Can't remember drawing half of my sketchbook. I do art but not that kind. It's strange. People at school talk to me and know my name but I think it's my first time meeting them. I now don't know most people's names because I'm too scared to ask them again. I'm half Australian half British. I sometimes talk super Australian sometimes like the queen's English. I always assumed that it was because I grew up with two different accents. I dissociate a lot. Its weird. Like all of a sudden I have reached my bus stop, finished the episode, written out the whole essay, the lesson is done just as I sit down. Ect ect. It's scary. My vision does that thing like where you are cross-eyed and it splits in to 2 overlapping pictures that are identical? Idk it's hard to explain in text. Depersonalisation and derealisation all the time. All. The. Time. Half my memories are of me. I see me from another perspective instead of first person. Hearing voices, Yh but I thought it was me but its like there is multiple people talking, not just one. I have flashbacks. Lots. But only of very small, 1-2 second snippets. My handwriting changes so much my teachers hate me. OK I think so. Any ideas on how to talk to family about it?
On my last 2 birthdays I've dissociated to a little to protect me from something and it seems to dissapear after a while. I never have headaches (i don't seem to notice it that easy) but this channel has opened a light in my mind which caused a headache and suddenly i started having tears which has been a hard thing to let out in a long time
My partner told me earlier today that they have DID so now im watching a bunch of videos to try understand and support them better. I hope I can support them as much as I can
headaches, yeah, a lot of headsches childhood memory issues, before the age of 9/10 i cant really remember much, just some random things here and there i also have wierd fears for no reason, like expecting someone to hurt me if i drop something, expecting a tap on the shoulder to turn into a punch and only having a certain amount of time a day i can be touched with out having an anxiety attack current memory issues, ive missed from hours to days to weeks of my life buying things, random things appear on my desk/in my bag and supposedly i bought them/had them given to me but ive never seen them before, it doesnt happen too often though, misnaming, this happens a lot due to me not being out as trans, however i have been called by a totally different name before, i think i missed a couple here my memory just blanked for a couple seconds but Kyle was in the middle of one word and then starting a new sentence? dissasociating happens a lot, and sometimes i dont even feel like a real person, i often dissasociate when driving however listening to music helps a lot. depersonalization and derealization both happen to me a lot, longest occurence of this for me has been 2 years nonstop hearing voices, i never really consciously registered them but i do hear them on occasion, more often its in the form of abstract images that sound different to my own thoughts, if that makes sense? flahsbacks/ptsd i only have flashbacks to a recent traumatic experience. handwriting is sometimes fancy cursive, sometimes my normal handwriting, sometimes a large messy scrawl that my friends describe as scary. i dunno, just sort of dropped my experience with these symptoms on you, sorry! this is also a super old video so i doubt anyone will see so i dunno why im apologizing
This is all to real My “mama” is a nurse and she thinks I have d.i.d my older sister has it and so does my twin caused by trauma in the foster care system and abuse I’m trying to get the balls to tell my therapist but I’m kinda scared so far I have 3 Leo he’s 3 Gabe he’s 8 and tucker he’s 10 I think
So I'm questioning whether or not I have this. It's normally caused by trauma or abuse, I wasn't abused but my mom left when I was like 2 or 3, and after that, I was a lot different. I remember in 1st grade, kids in my class kept asking "Why do you keep talking in a British accent?" and I had zero memory of doing any of that. I said "I wasn't.. what are you talking about?" I was so confused.. Also one of my friends told me about things I did but I LITERALLY HAVE NO MEMORY OF DOING SO. Which I was doing all these weird things like touching her boobs which I'd never do. And with my memories, I can't tell what happened and what was a dream, which might be something totally different but yea I also have so many memory gaps. I don't even remember what I did this morning. It's almost like I'm watching myself do things but I don't have any control. I'm always zoning out and pretty much leaving the world. Which most of the time when this happens I hear these voices in my head. I already have depression and anxiety so I'm definitely not "normal" I know this is long lol, but I'm a bit concerned.
Id reccommend talking to a doctor about this honey, personally I do think your description sounds like it could be DID, or OSDD, however I cant diagnose you myself 💛 Best wishes sweetheart- Sally
or maybe derealisation / depersonalisation? maybe you could do a bit of research on those. But Sally’s definitely right - best thing to do if you’re worried is go to the doctor or a psychologist! xx
Definitly go to a psychiatrist. I'm currently seeking a diagnosis (i figured out i had it 4 years ago and then went into dental and that didn't go too well. For one i only remember about 2 years of my life and I'm almost 18. I've read journal entries by the others so i know what happened but it's like a bullet point list with still moron pictures if i concentrate REALLY hard. I don't have the accent thing but one of mine either stutters really bad or is non verbal. Ghost talks with a voice lower than i know how to do And sunshine talks quite high pitched. And everyone but my Dragon alter has terrible posture. That sounds similar to what made me think i had it
Right, so I'd definitely consider DID being an option. I just recently remembered a glimpse of abuse when I was young and PTSD surrounding my mother has rlly been kicking in the past week or so. I'm seeing a new therapist and also a psychiatrist. I hope that I get a diagnosis soon.
The description of dissociation really hit hard. I get that a lot. It's annoying and painful. Occasionally it's kinda nice if i'm prepared to just let go, but most of the time it's a pain in the ass
I DID very interesting especially because there’s not a whole lot of representation in the public sphere apart from dramatized exaggerations. Funny though I can totally relate to some of these symptoms, I have chronic migraines, so very different, but constant headache that meds don’t fix? Check. That foggy (now I know is dissociated) feeling, that I always describe as being outside of my body trying to control it, like my body is a puppet, definitely. Memory loss (though obviously not as severe), yep. Fatigue, all day every day. The feeling that life is almost not worth it because you lose too much time? Yeah, I get that too, but just because of pain instead. Very different but still similar, the brain is an amazing thing. Love your videos, so informative
I’ve been watching more DID videos and I’m really starting to think I have it: 1. I have headaches all the time that make me feel dizzy like I’m a bit car sick 2. I can’t remember about four years from childhood and three from teenage years 3. This week I’ve lost about four hours that I don’t remember but I noticed that I’m in a different area than I last remembered and doing things I normally don’t 4. I have friends that call me a different name and told me that my voice changed 5. I have so many items that I don’t remember buying nor would I buy them myself but they can be found in my bank statement 6. This whole month doesn’t feel real or like it even happened.
I remember one time, in elementary school I was in class doing something (I can't remember what) and I sort of came to and my teacher was yelling at me. I had scissors in my hand and apparently I had been cutting my hair. I was really upset because I didn't remember doing it and I didn't know how to explain that to the teacher or my parents. I have had incidents of dissociating and losing time as well as finding evidence of having done things that I don't remember doing. However these symptoms aren't too strong or frequent for me to feel like I should talk to a therapist about the possibility of D.I.D. If they get worse or more frequent I would consider talking to one though. I do feel like I have more than one personality state, but I don't know if it is just my imagination or something I should be worried about.
If it's not interfering in your daily life then I wouldn't say its something you need to worry about right now. If you're worried though do contact your GP or a therapist and explain your symptoms - just dont diagnose yourself, let them do that :)
Earlier, in preschool, some kid fell and cut their lip. I was playing when one of the teachers pulled me aside and asked how I would feel if I got hurt and someone was laughing at me. I didn’t know what to say so she said, “you need to think about that,” and left. 1.I had and still have no memory of laughing at her. In fact, I remember being scared because of all the blood. And 2. I would never ever laugh at someone else’s expense.
I love this channel so much. I don't have DID, but I do have C-PTSD. It causes me emotional blockage (I can be VERY apathic at times and most times i don't feel all human) it also causes me to dissociate 20+times a day(spanning seconds to up to a few hours) Sometimes i feel like I'm possessing my own body. ( I can look at my hand and be 100% sure it's not mine or look in the mirror and be afraid bc I don't recognize myself) Sometimes the world just seems like VR. For a while I thought I had DID or something like it bc I would forget things (I thought it was amnesia) combined with repressed memory, derealization and dissociation...i was convinced. Finding your channel was life changing. The information you given me made me realize that I didn't have DID, but also made me seek help. Through that I found out about my C-PTSD (among other things) and am getting better. I don't comment and I deff don't overshare but I thought that you deserve to know how much you've helped me and how big of a part you played in my recovery and therapy. (Even though I don't have DID). Please keep making content!
I am no expert, but after watching several of these videos, I suspect the process of switching is somehow related to the neurological ability of the brain to rewire itself to deal with physical nerve damage (i.e. "neuroplasticity"). In the case of DID, I think it may be a case of a temporary or short-term rewiring rather than the long-term rewiring of neuroplasticity. That is, those with DID, or even just the potential to develop DID have an extra survival adaptation to have greater neuroplasticity, either genetic or epigenetic in origin. This would, in my opinion, go a long way to explain why not all children who experience extreme repeated trauma develop DID -- not everyone has the neuro-flexibility to take dissociation this extra step. *** NOTE ***: This is just an idea that occurred to me while watching these videos, based on my rather limited knowledge of neuro-physiology. Maybe someone with access to an expert can bring it up to them. In other words, I may be completely off-base on this. Just thought I should share it in case it can help someone. Oh, I forgot to add, this would also explain the headaches that go with the switch -- that rewiring would likely be painful. It also reminds me of in electronics, an FPGA -- that is, to put it very over-simplified, hardware that can have its functioning reprogrammed. This may be too technical for this particular forum, but I don't have a better place to put it.
This covered many of the symptoms really well. I'm glad you mentioned demonic possession. I was told by some Christians that I was possessed and even had some pray to try to exorcise demons from me. It was very traumatic but at the time I was desperate for some relief from the craziness that was my life. I was hearing voices and self-harming but didn't know I had DID. Once I became aware of some of my alters, I realized what was happening. Thankfully I had a really great therapist who helped me work through things. I caution anyone who thinks that alters are demons to educate themselves. Thanks to Kyle for doing the video, he did a great job.
I don’t have DID (as far as I know) but the way you were described the foggy memory loss feelings and how hard it is to feel like your life matters when you’re not even sure of what was real and what you dreamed up hit me hard. I’ve always known that the big gaps of memory loss were a self defense mechanism from my childhood but I always felt alone about it. People always think It’s insane how much I don’t remember and I’m more amazed at how much others do. It’s kind of nice to know I’m not alone in with this “grim” feeling ❤️
Thank you, Kyle! You explained it well and Chloe added the couple of definition inserts. You all work so well together! I am learning much you are helping in my learning.
i think i might have some form of DID but i wasn’t abused as a child (bad things have happened like death of a family member and constant stress from both my anxiety disorder and stuff but i don’t think it counts as trauma because people have it worse than me) but i also don’t remember much of my childhood. the ‘alters’ i have usually don’t fully come out unless they are needed and when they do i can usually remember some of what they did but it doesn’t feel like i did it i guess?? my voice changes when they come out too, Jake’s voice is deep and Mallory’s voice is higher and her way of speech is different. when im really dissociated i can hear talking in my head sometimes and everything goes wonky and idk how to explain it. im only 15 (soon going to be 16) and im scared to talk to my therapist about this because i feel paranoid and think “oh well what if you’re just faking all of this??” and i don’t know what to do.. thank you if you read all of this, i just need some help.
Hello honey, first of all - it doesn't matter if someone else has it worse than you, your feelings and trauma are VALID. Other peoples experiences dont discount your own. Its okay to use that word. A death of a family member is traumatic, but unless it happened before the age of 8 it wouldnt have caused DID, but if you already have it it would have contributed to it. The idea of DID is that if you did experience repeated trauma or abuse as a child, you wouldn't remember it, but i dont want to scare you :) It takes an approximate 7-10 years on average in the mental health treatment system before getting a correct diagnosis of DID, as its surrounded by stigma even amoungst professionals. If you do have it, it can be a fight to get the right help. But I must urge you darling, please do get in contact with a professional and explain your symptoms, or if youre not comfortable enough with that yet join some support groups on facebook. I would reccommend the group "Living with Dissociative Identity Disorder" for you. Its where we started asking questions. Message any of us if you need help dear, and good luck. -Sally xxx
you may have a type of DDNOS! it's like DID, but you don't really "lose time" or not know what your alters are doing. basically youre still co-conscious with your alters! it's definitely good to talk to your therapist about it!
YellowChild oof , it doesn't have to be abuse. My trauma was medical! Its basically anything severe and inescapable. And, my alters don't front much, they go through me. OSDD is another diagnosis which is DID but without amnesia, because the alters don't front as intensely,
OSDD I'd the new term for DDNOS. I am conscious of what my other are doing but in back, kinda. It's pretty much DID without the amnesia. I was diagnosed with DDNOS several years ago. I recently found out the name had changed. Dissociative disorder not otherwise specified became other specified dissociative disorder.
YellowChild there are two forms of DID: overt and covert. Overt is where you assume a different personality, however you are well aware but you don't have control of it. Covert is the one where you lose yourself completely.
"If you're going to make makeup make it tastey" Why is this such a mood? I saw your guys interview with Anthony and now I'm going to binge all of your videos.
idk about them but, My mom had DID (she passed a few years ago), and there was a field with horses that we'd drive past. And one of her littles, 4, who switched out the most out of all of her alters, would get really excited and jump out, "The horsies are out!" and a few times the grip on the steering wheel would slack or sometimes tilt towards the field a bit. I'd have to call out to my mom so she could keep driving us. Once my dad was like, "Yes, the horsies are out, but you need to let Miss Karen drive right now." and 4 pouted but (thankfully) accepted it. Most of the time it wasn't a problem though.
I was going to be a psychiatrist but ultimately took a different route. I’ve forgotten how much I love studies and information about disorders and things. Thank you for reminding me that there are people going through things that little of us know or understand. The first step in moving towards ridding our world of false/harmful cliches or ideas of mental health is to inform the public. Your system is beautiful and your work on this platform is more valuable than I think some recognize.
there are four-five voices I hear often and I've even had full conversations with myself. I have a classmate who says I talked with her often in elementary and I don't remember talking to her at all and I feel so bad for forgetting.
I just discovered your channel today. Thank you all for making this content possible. I can’t imagine how hard it must be to coordinate between all of you to record and edit these videos. It’s already hard doing everything on your own (as one individual), but all of you alters deserve an applause for learning to work together despite the hardships you have to deal with everyday (or every moment in conscience to be more specific). I’m learning a lot thanks to these videos. Will binge watch your whole channel. Lots of love from Venezuela 💟
How do you recommend I talk to my alters and find out who’s who and so on. I get switches migraines etc. I get stressed and start getting moody emotional about things etc then get tired and it’s hard with friends I dno how I feel
@@Ohkeh640 my therapist had me start by creating a time line (as best I could), with lots of empty spaces for alters to fill in as they wanted. Also, my therapist recommended journaling. That's when I realized why my hand writing changes so drastically at times. Both worked pretty well with us. Some systems even have a written contracts, about what's allowes and what isn't (we don't).
Not too long ago my mom and brother were talking about a dog that i had. I have zero recollection of this dog. That made me realize that there is very little that i remember up until my early teens. Just occasional flashes, small glimpses of certain events, occurrences or people.
Argh I'm watching this series, finally (even though I've been watching you for a bit now) and it's almost equal parts triggering and a relief to hear these symptoms. Thank you. I'm making a checklist, haha.. Also, today was the first time I said out loud to a professional about my thoughts that I might have DID. It was very emotional and weird, but the professional said I should definitely get into diagnostic interviews and stuff, and validated my thoughts as being legit . felt good. I don't know why but for some reason I feel that I should tell you. You all have been such a big part of my dive into self-realization. Hmm, yes. Dozing off now. Thanks 💖💜💙
I think you are doing an incredible service to people with your condition. I hope your platform keeps growing. After watching several of your videos, it dawned on me that I think I knew a girl with DID in high school. I had a couple of different classes with her and I always thought she was odd because she was so different in each subject. Talked to her a few times but I always thought she was odd because her opinions would differ dramatically from conversation to conversation and she would “act” (that’s what I thought it was) as though she could not recall previous conversations sometimes. I thought she was doing that for attention, to be “eccentric “. After you explained that Kyle was taking science and Nadia art, it makes sense to me. There were rumors that she was engaging in self-harming behavior, and abuse at home. There was an investigation at some point, but nothing came about because she apparently contradicted herself in her statements. This also makes sense to me know after I heard about you talk about the different roles of alters, and how some will try to keep others from talking about the abuse. I don’t know what happened to her after high school, but during that time she definitely did not get the help she needed. I believe if your videos would have been available back then a lot of people, including myself would treated her differently.
The description of depersonalization and derealization was so spot on and I’ve been trying so hard to figure out how to explain how it feels. I thought I was crazy for so long because I’m almost constantly in that kinda state and it felt like no one I talked to about it really understood what I was talking about
Hi! I started watching your videos a few weeks ago when my doctor suggested I might have DID. I've now been 'properly' diagnosed and I wanted to thank you for making such thoughtful and accurate videos! I have a 'milder' version of DID (I only have a few alters, though likely I'll develop more, I'm told) and I'm new to all of this. My system and I are trying to get settled into our new way of life and these videos are very helpful and accurate! I showed your channel to my friend and she said it was very helpful to her. You're all very nice and I appreciate you sharing this with us! Switching is still very awkward for us. We'd been doing it for years (mostly Zoe, {who, if I had to I'd compare to Sally} and I.) Your videos are greatly appreciated. They cheer us up when we've had a stressful day, and some of your tips on how to manage the system effectively are definitely working! Thank you! -Ella
Had to pause to shoot this comment but when you went into "depersonalization" and "derealization" it really hit me hard. I've got tears rolling down my face as I type right now because I finally feel understood on that level I've been craving my whole life. You all have such a way (your own way) with words and describe the way these things feel in an understandable, educational and real way. I haven't been diagnosed with DID. In fact, I've just recently (in the past year) started looking into it. I was diagnosed with PTSD and severe GAD (generalized anxiety disorder) at ten, coupled with mild depressive episodes and bouts of agoraphobia/social anxiety. However, I felt like all those diagnoses were great, but never really explained the problem. I was scheduled to begin medication for my deepening PTSD and anxiety when I was seventeen and had some trauma going on in my life, but was terrified to take the medication and never filled the prescriptions. Lately, I've been feeling like I've been getting worse again. I can't remember hardly anything at all, feel spacey and 'not myself' for days/weeks/months at a time, and have extreme and excessive mood swings accompanied by 'headaches' (which I can't really call headaches. They feel like headaches, but don't hurt like them). I have two toddlers and I want to take action and feel more in control of my life. Your videos really brought some light to this perplexing disorder, and now I feel much more inclined and determined to go and get help for these problems I'm having. I don't want to feel ashamed anymore. (Sorry for the super long comment)
Got both diaths pierced last summer. Game changer. Still feel a pressure and sometimes sleepy with it. But seriously, worth a shot, please let us kno if it works for u because it could help others. And we know yous all over that. Could be just a placebo but defos worth a shot. Took about 6 months to heal FYI Hope it helps Yous vids have really helped discover things unrealised Ur a hero to me tbh All parts of u Thank you so much for sharing. Ur so brave xx Keep doing it Its really helpful and bravery is contagious With love xx
You and your alters are awesome for sharing like this. I have experienced most of the same symptoms. Very confusing for years until I found a great therapist who helped us so much to learn to live with each other. There are many of us but primarily 7 main personalities. It is nice to know there are other's like use. Thankyou for sharing.
amazing I haven`t watched this videos in a couple months, and because I've been having periods of depersonalization again I started rewatching and without knowing or remembering anything I recognized that Kyle was Kyle immediately
Hi! I'm new to the channel. Just wanted to say thank you for sharing your experiences and spreading awareness, all of yous 💖 lovely to meet you Kyle, and I can't wait to meet everyone else!
15:40 to 17:00 I just had your channel recommended to me. I'm very ignorant about dissociation and my disorder in general. And you just quoted what I've told my therapist and how I've felt my entire life. Almost word for word. Gave me a little goose bump lol
DissociaDID haha yeah it's your accent and your demeanour sort of at least for me. Anyways I like your explination of things in the video, it's pretty good for anyone who isn't familiar with DID.
When I started watching your channel I had just seen something that referenced DID. I didn’t know what the character had and if it was fictional so I went to find out. I also had thought that it couldn’t be like what they had shown as an example, so I wanted to know what it was really, if it was real. That’s when I found this channel. This seemed really remarkable to me and amazing just how the brain works. The fact that people would want to fake that they had it really dissapointed me. I found myself recently realizing that I felt off, I mean, I don’t want to be the person who assumes they have every disorder they come across and self diagnose, but when I told my friends about the fact that I dissociate a lot and when it occurred while I was with them I got replies like, “umm... are you okay?” And “are you sure your okay? That’s not normal...” the thing is dissociating is really normal for me. I dissociate a lot. All the time, for seemingly no reason. For example I once dissociated for 15 minutes while looking at grass. I couldn’t remember what I was trying to do afterward and the person I was hanging out with claimed that they where calling my name. I did in my past experiance trauma, the trauma was emotional. It went untreated, and to this day, haunts me. I remember only a moment, then it just stops. I don’t remember anything other than short clips almost like photos that are really clear up until I turned 10 or so. That might just be my memory though. I often find myself wondering where things (especially clothing) come from and have no memory of getting them ever, plus most of the time I can’t see myself ever wearing anything like it. I have never had anyone walk up to me, and me not knowin them, but I frequently find myself feeling like I am watching myself, especially in stressful situations. My family says I’m very disconnected and elsewhere very often, and miss a lot of things. I do hear kind of commentary as well sometimes, but that could just be me. Thank you for reading my comment! :)
I really liked this video by Kyle, I learned not only about the symptoms but also the difficulties that come with some of those symptoms, and I think that's important.
it is so crazy going back to these old videos that i watched when they first came out. i feel like overtime he definitely became more comfortable and natural infront of the camera and really just was himself, i love kyle so much and everyone else in the system and seeing them grow and change with the channel and all that has gone down, love u all! xx
In high school, I remember losing huge chunks of time. Like, I'd be standing at my locker & then I'd be in a classroom without traveling there, & my friends would ask what the hell was wrong with me, & I'd find out it was Thursday instead of Monday. Yes, I suffered extreme abuse from age 3. I do remember chanting, "I'm not here. I'm not here, I'm not here," over and over as my abuser entered the room. So pretty textbook, I guess. I knew most of my alters, but I worked hard to keep anyone from finding out. I've learned to sort of crowd everyone together so there's a sort of higher consciousness, & I don't let anyone come to the front & assert themselves anymore. Don't know if that's healthier or not.
No its not healthy at all. I'm so so sorry what happened to you but your alters are here to help you and if you refuse to let them front even tho it can be very scary not doing things and missing days you must treat them respectfully as they exist the same as you and they are as real as you and me and everything else. They have emotions and feelings and thoughts and wants and needs just like you and me, talk to them like using apps to have you and them talk, use paper notes, diaries or books with blank pages and more and you can also talk to each other when one or more is co con. You must let alters front also since they may start hating you and do terrible things because of being ignored and thought of as terrible. Care for them as they share the same body you are in, don't hurt them and share the body, good luck and I again am so so sorry for the trauma that happened to you. It starting at 3 is absolutely insane and just so shocking. This is from an alter in a system of 2001 alters - Ash
Hello there weather it’s Chloe or another alter reading this I need some insight So when I dissociate, it happens for a long amount of time. I remember sitting down for church and by the time I snapped back into “consciousness” so to speak it was done. Church lasts two hours.. Another time it had happened from Lunch *1:00* to the start of dinner*5:30*I have the feeling of depersonalization and derealization like you have suggested the symptoms are and some out of body experiences but I don’t understand what it is that I’m feeling. I feel a sense of worthlessness sometimes but than other times I feel overly confident. I’m not sure if I have DID but some things that Kyle explains here I feel, is there something that matches how I feel or what I do? Or am I just not feeling it sometimes? And also at a certain point you had explained that you had hearing voices before you were diagnosed with DID, I have that too and I have female voices and different accents. Everyone tells me that talking in your head is either me going crazy or completely normal, so I’m confused. I find it uncomfortable for me to open up to parents about my personal life and mental life so for me admiring that I have to see someone is hard.
Thanks for advice I just didn’t want to be overreacting or have me suspect something that’s not fully correct Also the fact that I don’t have gaps in my child memories And I haven’t experience any abuse of any kind in my childhood either as unfortunately many people with DID do
And, yes, you give me much to think about re my own life and memories, early childhood is sort of blurry and I have just a few memories. But I was a spacey kid with a very intense, unhappy mom. Maybe I just shut out the unhappy stuff mainly. As an adult I have had to work on being more aware of details in my physical surroundings. I think it is important to savor and appreciate life and beauty around me.
I've watched all your recent videos and just stumbled on this older one. Definitely identify with all of these experiences. We've been diagnosed 10 years and it something we are just coming to terms with and really gaining system cooperation and communication in the last year. Your channel along with Multiplicity and Me and the Entropy System has helped us immensely.
I’ve seen several videos now and I’m so glad that your system is educating about DID. I don’t personally have it but I have other mental health issues and I know how important it is for people to feel understood and connected to others in similar situations. I do have a question, during your life (for example high school or university) would alters go through life unaware of Chloe or did the various alters know that they were alters? From what I think I understand, each alter was living their own life unaware of the others, right? I’d love clarification if you can!
I had a student with DID. It was pretty incredible yet heartbreaking to watch her go through her days but she was and is such a warrior and so were her six Alters. I will never ever forget that experience and when her Alters would come forward sometimes I was not able to notice immediately and I would just say hey hun. And they knew to say their name.
Hi! I've really enjoyed your two videos so far! I have a couple questions. So 1) Chloe, was it weird for you to see Kyle in this video? Was it the first time you've seen one of your alters? 2) How does each of your alters self-identify? As i've seen you've posted on like instagram and stuff that each has a gender (i could be wrong) and each has a name? Would be really interesting to know the processes of this.
Love you lots and loving what you're doing! ❤️
Hey Maya! It was very odd to watch back yes, I've never seen a video of Kyle before but I've seen videos of other alters, especially littles! It's still a new experience as we are continually finding out more about each other, and for me it's definitely a little disturbing and frightening to watch your own body doing things you never would, with no memory of it happening, but it's also quite funny to see his mannerisms on my face too!
Yes, every alter is essentially their own person created to contain or deal with a trauma, and as they all have different experiences they have all developed differently, on top of of course their core different aspects that were designed by the brain for a necessary purpose. Eg: protector, carer, victim, etc. Everyone has their own names that they chose or were given by abusers and chose to reclaim, and their own genders, opinions, memories, sexualities and views on others and the world :)
Sometimes gender in an alter is created randomly by the brain, and sometimes an alter is created with a certain gender as a necessity. For example if a childs female body is being abused s*xually, a male alter is more likely to be created to hold those memories as they are physically more removed from the experience due to not having the same physical parts and awareness down there, helping them to deal with specialised trauma more effectively. It might help to think of it in terms of "this could never happen to me" - and so an alter is created thats as different from the body or person experiencing it as possible to hold those experiences, for example, as an alter of the opposite sex. :)
Hope this helps! Please let us know if you need any more explanation on this or anything else! We love you lots too, really glad you're enjoying the channel so far! 😄✌❤ -Chloe xx
Melena Soleil Chloe was diagnosed when she’s 20 answered thru her first q&a.
O
Melena Soleil Chloe likely doesn’t remember what the trauma was, which is the purpose of having alters, to protect the host from unbearable memories. And even if she did, I think it’s disrespectful to ask her to discuss it. She is being very brave and generous to share her life with us, in a quest to explain and educate about DID. What happened to her to cause the condition is not the point, and is a very private thing that is none of our business unless one of them chooses to bring it up. I hope she will continue to share her journey, as long as it is productive for her / her system, and I hope it is helpful in some way as she moves forward into a better future for herself.
iceartist22 Wow...that's EXACTLY what I was thinking...like no offense but did she/he really expect details? Ummm...talk about TRIGGERS! Yeah. No thanks. PLEASE don't go down that road Chloe & the team. 😀👍🏼BTW, first time writing...lol, "hiding" deep into the "replies" of the comments. Please call me JESSIE.
Jessie
“She’s always buying art stuff that she never uses” with an annoyed face 😂 so much shade
I also noticed that and laughed. haha
He sounded like my mother there lmao
Crystal Juliettte I do that too, most of what I own is art supplies
That hit me so hard XD
I feel called out lmao, because I do the same. It's just I want to do art, but I don't have the time 😔
The opening scene of Kyle complaining about makeup tasting bad is the best😂
Tbh, as a male alter, I agree with Kyle. Wth makeup makers? MAKE IT DELICIOUS!
@@nova.a.star89 once I had lip balm that tasted like banana, I ate it
“if you’re going to make makeup make it tasty” 😂
Kyle would love Too Faced haha
Kyle is my spirit animal XD
It’s true though! That’s why I can’t wear lipstick
"Shut up!"
They didn't listen to him because he told them the truth
Yes
P.s. I accidentally pressed the dis-like button sorry
Kyle sounds like the older brother who has no idea why his little sister does any of this but supports her anyway because he loves her and is playing along to make her happy regardless😂❤️
Also thank you (all) for your bravery and sharing your experience with D.I.D with the world.
I only started watching today and have binging the videos back to back because it's so interesting and fascinating.
Remarkable how a brain works !!!
Keep up the good work! I really do hope your channel grows more and for people to see these videos and understand.
Same for me I started yesterday and now I’m going through the series. Also I love this channel so much thanks for the the positivity
Loving Kyle the most xD 😅 great job on your channel tho @DisociaDID 🥰 keep up the good work, you inspired me to spread awareness, about anxiety and depression, since i only have those for now, thank god
The fact that Kyle has an existential crisis moment on video should be enough to prove his validity as a person to anyone.
Kyle is so different to you, Chloe! The accent, the attitude, the way he animates your face. You can definitely see that this is not Chloe here
Rainbow JenJen yes I knew it was him right away just from the voice
Rainbow JenJen I have a headache. And I have large childhood gaps in my memory.
@@MarkelAGamez if you think you have it, try getting a diagnosis
He slouches soooooo much compared to Chloe.
@@MarkelAGamez why reply it to this comment?
Kyle made me laugh in the beginning. He's got a point about makeup xD
Kyle nailed it on the makeup thing well done mate
Tah mate!
Chloe probably did it
@@DissociaDID I can hear this in Kyle's accent lmao
I don’t remember like 80% of my childhood but I think I just have a crapy memory
Hahah lots of people dont remember much of their childhood, you might be right, but 80% is a lot! 😂
Rowen McIver Hires I don't remember most of my childhood or big chunks of my adulthood, or most of my Day to day life. I don't know how to find out if I have DID, I have a different diagnosis.
Rowen McIver Hires Same here, actually. Like the only parts I can really and truly remember are the ones without my mother in it. I also used to hear voices as a child too, but it was more creepy than anything. Thankfully, I rarely ever hear them anymore - well, with the exception of a few giggles and unpleasant phrases here and there. It’s probably just a coincidence though.
Last year I lost a friend and since then I got more depressed and lost more of my childhood memory.. I know I don't have DID.. 'cuz I don't switch.. (or I just don't know xD ) but I never had a moment where I didn't knew what happend... I think soo... now that I rethink maybe xD idk... it's weird xD
I'm in the same boat. I was diagnosed with BPD but disaasociation is my most common symptom. Each of my voices are differen people, there's a grandma whos sweet and loving her name is just granny, then there's snake who's a stone cold bitch and makes me hate myself, then there's lara who is me as a little girl and lately there's been then other one who's a little girl maybe jasmine whos really sexual and shes like 8 to 10 years old and sisters with lara. Snake is the worst but she just is hurting and angry and hates everything because she's mad.
I’m just wondering...WHO is responsible for ALL this TRAUMA in your past.
SHAME ON THEM. It infuriates me when I think of a grown-ass adult doing things to or around children and the long term effects of it!!! It’s so devastating and I’m so sorry for whatever happened to you.
But look at your support network.
You got people in your corner now. All this “friends” you lost,
they weren’t really your friends. Now you have true friends!!
Can you have DID without having any trauma?
@@CarolynShakshi oh okay. Can you have a trauma that you don’t really remember? Like my mother told me that when I was little I used to cry a lot. Like not cry cause of no reason like a baby does but like cause my dad would yell at me. Right now I don’t remember it though. Cause I have literally all the symptoms of DID but idk about the switching. Well, obviously I wouldn’t know about it if I didn’t even know what DID was. But I do black out sometimes and have huge memory loss gaps. I would never self diagnose like Trisha did. But I’m not sure about switching at all. A lot of times my mother tells me to do chores and I don’t even remember her asking to do them. It’s like if I switch for like 10 minutes and then I come back to myself
@@woah9599 You can absolutely have trauma without remembering it. See a doctor/therapist if you can, if you have concerns about possibly having DID or any other mental issue. Good luck!
@@ravenclaw832 recently found out i supressed the memories of my parents always fighting fun fun
@@woah9599 Could that be a different dissociative disorder like dissociative amnesia (??? Sorry, my memory on the names is blurry)
Two seconds in and Kyle’s already too relatable lol
honestly kyle is a natural behind the camera, both with the padilla interview (which got me to your channel, yes i think im about to binge you WHOLE CHANNEL) and the outro was great too!
This whoooooole comment read my mind
Same on everythin
Yeah, I also started watching from that video.
I am from the same thing
You girls need to let Kyle make more videos without makeup and rocking his favorite masculine hat. Lol
I'm having fun getting to know this system. I'm going to keep watching all your videos that are popping up on recommended. :D weeeeeeeeeeeee
we have demon alters, a priest alter, angels, because our trauma was heavily related to religion. it definitely isn't possession or supernatural, I don't understand how people can think that
My mum's friend has a vampire alter
We have a wolf alter since a lot our trauma was based on wolves. Non human Alters are so valid
I think what makes it different from entities and alters is that, entities are outside forces, and alters are strictly you. Like entities can leave or go to someone else, while alters usually just integrate or stay with you.
I don't know too much about the subject, but as someone who is a spirit worker and deals with mental illnesses and disorders, it can be difficult to differentiate what is a non physical being and the act of your own mind.
Channeling and possession is similar to dissociating, as you can lose time, but not every channeling is like that and can often happen where you are conscious during the channeling.
But if u dont believe in that just ignore me!!!!! (':
@@knifegoblin1554 ooo same. Ours is named Ghost, pure white wolf, and we love her
Caleb Hunter ours is Sanctus! He’s a huge grey wolf! That’s really cool to hear about
what it thought i was going to get : a good educational video
what I got : * Kyle * " YA'LL HERE ARE SOME TIPS ON MAKEUP. MAKE IT TASTY."
(I totally agree tbh also thank you all for these videos. they're educational and entertaining)
Yo that shit had me dead af. The phone thingy is real as fuuuuck. The others come out for a few minutes and suddenly I don’t know where my phone is. We don’t all put our phone in the same pocket because we aren’t all right handed so sometimes we spend 10 minutes looking for our damn phone only to find out Alex came out for all of five minutes and put it in the wrong freaking pocket.
Alexandr Bohler
This is why we wear hoodies because then there’s only one pocket so it doesn’t matter what side you put it in lmao
We did lose our hat once when someone threw it across the room because it was too hot. Because they couldn’t just take it off lmao
Oof, all of us are right handed, but we dont all put it in the same pocket.
We're meant to keep our phone in our bag for school, but most of our alter who are older than the physical body are like
Yeeeeeeeeeeah, no.
And so that's always fun.
This made me laugh 😄
Sounds like fun. All of us are left handed, we all tend to use the same pocket.
When Kyle was complaining about Chloe's art supplies that she never uses, it was like a brother complaining about his sister. So funny
3:20 I know this is an old video but I still feel a compulsive need to remind people that it isn't necessarily abuse. Any kind of trauma, if bad enough, can trigger DID if that's how a child's brain is wired, particularly repetitive trauma. Obviously the most common repetitive trauma is abuse, but this is not always so, as is the case with my trauma. Sorry. Felt the need to.
Noah Fox thanks for clarifying! You’re right. It’s just repeated childhood trauma
I agree
Is it possible, that you have a trauma at the age of 13 which causes did?
xenopolis meh she said in a video it’s has to be before the personality is fully developed. Has to happen before the age of 9 usually
it is only possible to develop DID before the age of about like 6-7 but it is possible to develop PTSD at that age or any age
I have to agree with Kyle, haha. I'm a girl and don't wear any makeup because it smells and tastes weird. Whoever does the makeup though, it's utterly gorgeous.
I (Chloe) do the makeup! Thank you! 😄 Gotta agree too, it tastes horrendous when you get it in your mouth 😂
15:08 “it all makes scientific sense blablabla” -Kyle
Lol Kyle. 😂
Don't have DID, but I experience a lot of dissociation as a part of my late stage Lyme disease. Besides the different identities, I can relate to everything you say. Forgetting things, losing time, not feeling real. It sucks but you have to remember that your brain is working hard to make sense of the world!
that’s scary as hell sorry to hear u suffered like that and it was Lyme all along, this world is insane and you were sane the whole time
I feel similarly. Idk whats going on with me but I dissociate pretty often and lose lots of time. I'm sure it's not DID because i dont switch out I just switch off. And it's not just like getting lost in thought. So I feel ya.
Lyta A there are other dissociative disorders
Hmmm forgetting things is normal .
Dont know if i believe you megan
@@Lunabwolffang23you should watch DissociaDID's video on dissociation. Yes everyone dissociates but theres a limit to how much you can dissociate until its impacting your life. It's the same way with forgetting things. Everyone forgets, but if its interupting normal life plus you see other symptoms then its still an important symptom in diagnosis. A lot of us in these comment sections come to give our 2 cents and see if we can hear from other people but "I dont know if I believe you" isnt helpful or well-informed.
It's funny how we can notice it's Kyle even with the makeup and clothes.
😍
One of my alters has told me that she is me from a past life. (we are Wiccan and believe in reincarnation) -Cassada ("original")
I could tell by the thumbnail it was Kyle. All of you guys use the body’s muscles differently.
M'lynne Keeney I though it was Kyle because of the posture aswell then he started talking and was yeah that’s him
It's funny, the more of these videos I watch, the easier it is to tell them apart.
I myself didn't realize he it was Kyle, thought it was Jade. Lol the thumbnail did show it wasn't chloe.
I loved the “makeup tastes bad” speech in the beginning.
Kyle base line (talkin'bout facial expressions and body language) is SO DISTINCTIVE from the other alters is kinda funny
I paused the video for a while because I have to write what Kyle said: "how would you feel validated as a person when it feels like you're dreaming all the time."
opened my eyes to something i had barely any knowledge on.
you’re doing amazing lots of love💜💜
Thank you so much, so glad it was helpful! Lots of love to you too lovely! 💛💛💛
I wonder how many times a supernatural "posession" was just DID....
Falon Sherrard probably most of the time
Mine actually WAS demonic oppression. When Hades or Gail would come out I would literally morph into some being that wanted to eat people and drink blood. My dad's side of the family were satanists
Possession isnt a joke, but I'm sure people with DID or even schizophrenia have been falsely accused of being possessed
@@fuzzypanda5300 idk, could still be mental illness
@@fuzzypanda5300 omg I'm so sorry you experienced this, I'm french and I fought several times against these satanists networks, I hope you found a caring environment to live in !
Kyle is so funny, his intro had me in hysterics😂🌸
I can tell when Its Kyle immediately. He has a very kind of laid back, low-key, less emotional persona. Kinda like, “yeah...it’s me, I’m just here chillin.” Kind of charming personality. Kyle, by far is my favorite so far(of course Next to you, Chloe💛)! But then again, I’ve only seen Jade and one other...I can’t remember.
Fun fact!! Last year i thought I was transgender. Turns out i just had D.I.D and he was my alter. His name is Noah.
I'm one of those skeptical folks, but sheesh... I've been binge watching these videos and this one in particular makes me a believer! The speech, facial expressions, demeanor, etc... It's fascinating to watch, but must be so damn difficult to go through daily. I give this young lady so much credit for being an absolute warrior and getting this info out there. Thank you!!
Oh those switching headaches! It's like that sinus behind the eyes feel mixed with a migraine. Like our brain is one of those squishy toys and someone has pressed it and it still has that pressure before it releases and un-squishes. All of these bring back such vivid moments in life. Like finding things that aren't yours, losing my phone (such a common sign for me that someone else has been out) not recognising people who clearly recognise us n so on. You gave some very great explanations and examples. Great video. :)
Thank you! And that's exactly it, the worst feeling, like years of stress suddenly all compiled into your head at once 😓🤕
Lantern Skyy we don't get switching migraines, but we do feel kinda..ill? Like sick? We get chronic migraines instead :/ hhh
I get terrible switching headaches as well. It's so excruciating.
PerzianNL what do you mean by old host? If you don’t mind my asking
Oh god that would suck each time you swich.... I already get major headaches but someone with DID gets it way more often
"If you're gonna make your own line, make it tasty"
Kyle seems like such a cool guy xD ♡
Oh man, that brings back memories - we were convinced that we were “reincarnations” for years and were in such denial of our DID. It was so good to hear you talk about your experiences, Kyle 😃 Also we’re a bit excited cause you seem to live in the UK too, lol
Thanks mate! Yeah we are in UK, where r u guys @?? 😊
DissociaDID Yay! Halesowen, near Birmingham ☺️
Ahh we are in Norwich! ✌
This was me. I thought it was a reincarnation thing and....it was DID. Cue the existential crisis
To be honest, DID sounds very fascinating. I wanna learn more about it. Giving love and support!
I never comment on anything on TH-cam, but I just HAD to say hello! I randomly came across your channel, and I must say you seem like such a genuine, beautiful soul. I can’t wait to get to know all of your other alters, and learn more about DID, for as someone who suffers with mental illnesses of other kinds, your journey really interests me. Subscribed AND looking forward to watching more! Love, from Brisbane, Australia. xx
Awh thank you so much!! Sending all our love to Aussie! xx
I didn't think I would ever tell anyone about this but I just found your channel last night and I can't believe I'm not alone...The first time I realized that I had alters was when I was writing in a journal because I was going through tough times...I noticed that there would be different paragraphs of different handwriting and I was so confused and scared...then Alex spoke to me and told me that he is going to be with me through everything...I immediately looked into hearing voices and different handwriting (which there wasn't much on at the time I don't think) because this voice was unlike any other it was almost as if it sounded like my brother but in a different way....I've never written this down so now I feel stupid for sharing this....but I know I shouldn't because this is a community that I feel I can trust...well I thank anyone who reads this...be nice to yourself and others
Headaches, yes. Paracetamol and calpol doesn't help. Really bad, nearly every day no matter how much sleep or water I get. Litterally the sane as you described.
Faced ALOT of trauma as a child. Don't remember much of my entire childhood. Litterally years I can't remember. I say to my mum that something happened and she says it never did. Very confusing.
Can't remember drawing half of my sketchbook. I do art but not that kind. It's strange.
People at school talk to me and know my name but I think it's my first time meeting them. I now don't know most people's names because I'm too scared to ask them again.
I'm half Australian half British. I sometimes talk super Australian sometimes like the queen's English. I always assumed that it was because I grew up with two different accents.
I dissociate a lot. Its weird. Like all of a sudden I have reached my bus stop, finished the episode, written out the whole essay, the lesson is done just as I sit down. Ect ect. It's scary. My vision does that thing like where you are cross-eyed and it splits in to 2 overlapping pictures that are identical? Idk it's hard to explain in text.
Depersonalisation and derealisation all the time. All. The. Time. Half my memories are of me. I see me from another perspective instead of first person.
Hearing voices, Yh but I thought it was me but its like there is multiple people talking, not just one.
I have flashbacks. Lots. But only of very small, 1-2 second snippets.
My handwriting changes so much my teachers hate me.
OK I think so. Any ideas on how to talk to family about it?
On my last 2 birthdays I've dissociated to a little to protect me from something and it seems to dissapear after a while. I never have headaches (i don't seem to notice it that easy) but this channel has opened a light in my mind which caused a headache and suddenly i started having tears which has been a hard thing to let out in a long time
My partner told me earlier today that they have DID so now im watching a bunch of videos to try understand and support them better. I hope I can support them as much as I can
headaches, yeah, a lot of headsches
childhood memory issues, before the age of 9/10 i cant really remember much, just some random things here and there
i also have wierd fears for no reason, like expecting someone to hurt me if i drop something, expecting a tap on the shoulder to turn into a punch and only having a certain amount of time a day i can be touched with out having an anxiety attack
current memory issues, ive missed from hours to days to weeks of my life
buying things, random things appear on my desk/in my bag and supposedly i bought them/had them given to me but ive never seen them before, it doesnt happen too often though,
misnaming, this happens a lot due to me not being out as trans, however i have been called by a totally different name before,
i think i missed a couple here my memory just blanked for a couple seconds but Kyle was in the middle of one word and then starting a new sentence?
dissasociating happens a lot, and sometimes i dont even feel like a real person, i often dissasociate when driving however listening to music helps a lot.
depersonalization and derealization both happen to me a lot, longest occurence of this for me has been 2 years nonstop
hearing voices, i never really consciously registered them but i do hear them on occasion, more often its in the form of abstract images that sound different to my own thoughts, if that makes sense?
flahsbacks/ptsd i only have flashbacks to a recent traumatic experience.
handwriting is sometimes fancy cursive, sometimes my normal handwriting, sometimes a large messy scrawl that my friends describe as scary.
i dunno, just sort of dropped my experience with these symptoms on you, sorry!
this is also a super old video so i doubt anyone will see so i dunno why im apologizing
Taz Athena I see this and it’s ok. Trauma is hard but you will be ok
You don’t need to apologize. I doubt you’ll see this but I hope you are healthy and living a good live despite having DID.
"Reincarnation is when you come back as like a tree" 😂😂😂
I feel like you're the first person to lay out DID in a way that helps me understand it way better than I did before. Thank you all for sharing!
Ah im so happy to hear that! If it helps, its our pleasure! 💖
This is all to real
My “mama” is a nurse and she thinks I have d.i.d my older sister has it and so does my twin caused by trauma in the foster care system and abuse I’m trying to get the balls to tell my therapist but I’m kinda scared so far I have 3 Leo he’s 3 Gabe he’s 8 and tucker he’s 10 I think
Not sure if you will see this but I hope you and your siblings are having a better live now.
Stay strong I hope you are safe
Stay strong, I believe in you ♥
So I'm questioning whether or not I have this. It's normally caused by trauma or abuse, I wasn't abused but my mom left when I was like 2 or 3, and after that, I was a lot different. I remember in 1st grade, kids in my class kept asking "Why do you keep talking in a British accent?" and I had zero memory of doing any of that. I said "I wasn't.. what are you talking about?" I was so confused..
Also one of my friends told me about things I did but I LITERALLY HAVE NO MEMORY OF DOING SO. Which I was doing all these weird things like touching her boobs which I'd never do.
And with my memories, I can't tell what happened and what was a dream, which might be something totally different but yea
I also have so many memory gaps. I don't even remember what I did this morning.
It's almost like I'm watching myself do things but I don't have any control.
I'm always zoning out and pretty much leaving the world. Which most of the time when this happens I hear these voices in my head.
I already have depression and anxiety so I'm definitely not "normal"
I know this is long lol, but I'm a bit concerned.
Id reccommend talking to a doctor about this honey, personally I do think your description sounds like it could be DID, or OSDD, however I cant diagnose you myself 💛 Best wishes sweetheart- Sally
or maybe derealisation / depersonalisation? maybe you could do a bit of research on those. But Sally’s definitely right - best thing to do if you’re worried is go to the doctor or a psychologist! xx
Definitly go to a psychiatrist. I'm currently seeking a diagnosis (i figured out i had it 4 years ago and then went into dental and that didn't go too well. For one i only remember about 2 years of my life and I'm almost 18. I've read journal entries by the others so i know what happened but it's like a bullet point list with still moron pictures if i concentrate REALLY hard. I don't have the accent thing but one of mine either stutters really bad or is non verbal. Ghost talks with a voice lower than i know how to do And sunshine talks quite high pitched. And everyone but my Dragon alter has terrible posture. That sounds similar to what made me think i had it
I'm DID and all of this sounds really familiar to me.. If i were you if see a counselor who deals in traumas. Good luck!
Right, so I'd definitely consider DID being an option. I just recently remembered a glimpse of abuse when I was young and PTSD surrounding my mother has rlly been kicking in the past week or so. I'm seeing a new therapist and also a psychiatrist. I hope that I get a diagnosis soon.
I really like Kyle, he actually reminds me quite a bit of myself, thanks for the wonderful video!!!
I feel like every time I've heard from Kyle so far he has mentioned every time that makeup should taste good
The description of dissociation really hit hard. I get that a lot. It's annoying and painful. Occasionally it's kinda nice if i'm prepared to just let go, but most of the time it's a pain in the ass
I DID very interesting especially because there’s not a whole lot of representation in the public sphere apart from dramatized exaggerations. Funny though I can totally relate to some of these symptoms, I have chronic migraines, so very different, but constant headache that meds don’t fix? Check. That foggy (now I know is dissociated) feeling, that I always describe as being outside of my body trying to control it, like my body is a puppet, definitely. Memory loss (though obviously not as severe), yep. Fatigue, all day every day. The feeling that life is almost not worth it because you lose too much time? Yeah, I get that too, but just because of pain instead. Very different but still similar, the brain is an amazing thing. Love your videos, so informative
I see what you DID there!
I’ve been watching more DID videos and I’m really starting to think I have it:
1. I have headaches all the time that make me feel dizzy like I’m a bit car sick
2. I can’t remember about four years from childhood and three from teenage years
3. This week I’ve lost about four hours that I don’t remember but I noticed that I’m in a different area than I last remembered and doing things I normally don’t
4. I have friends that call me a different name and told me that my voice changed
5. I have so many items that I don’t remember buying nor would I buy them myself but they can be found in my bank statement
6. This whole month doesn’t feel real or like it even happened.
I remember one time, in elementary school I was in class doing something (I can't remember what) and I sort of came to and my teacher was yelling at me. I had scissors in my hand and apparently I had been cutting my hair. I was really upset because I didn't remember doing it and I didn't know how to explain that to the teacher or my parents. I have had incidents of dissociating and losing time as well as finding evidence of having done things that I don't remember doing. However these symptoms aren't too strong or frequent for me to feel like I should talk to a therapist about the possibility of D.I.D. If they get worse or more frequent I would consider talking to one though. I do feel like I have more than one personality state, but I don't know if it is just my imagination or something I should be worried about.
If it's not interfering in your daily life then I wouldn't say its something you need to worry about right now. If you're worried though do contact your GP or a therapist and explain your symptoms - just dont diagnose yourself, let them do that :)
DissociaDID k, thanks.
Earlier, in preschool, some kid fell and cut their lip. I was playing when one of the teachers pulled me aside and asked how I would feel if I got hurt and someone was laughing at me. I didn’t know what to say so she said, “you need to think about that,” and left. 1.I had and still have no memory of laughing at her. In fact, I remember being scared because of all the blood. And 2. I would never ever laugh at someone else’s expense.
I love this channel so much. I don't have DID, but I do have C-PTSD. It causes me emotional blockage (I can be VERY apathic at times and most times i don't feel all human) it also causes me to dissociate 20+times a day(spanning seconds to up to a few hours) Sometimes i feel like I'm possessing my own body. ( I can look at my hand and be 100% sure it's not mine or look in the mirror and be afraid bc I don't recognize myself) Sometimes the world just seems like VR. For a while I thought I had DID or something like it bc I would forget things (I thought it was amnesia) combined with repressed memory, derealization and dissociation...i was convinced. Finding your channel was life changing. The information you given me made me realize that I didn't have DID, but also made me seek help. Through that I found out about my C-PTSD (among other things) and am getting better. I don't comment and I deff don't overshare but I thought that you deserve to know how much you've helped me and how big of a part you played in my recovery and therapy. (Even though I don't have DID). Please keep making content!
I am no expert, but after watching several of these videos, I suspect the process of switching is somehow related to the neurological ability of the brain to rewire itself to deal with physical nerve damage (i.e. "neuroplasticity"). In the case of DID, I think it may be a case of a temporary or short-term rewiring rather than the long-term rewiring of neuroplasticity. That is, those with DID, or even just the potential to develop DID have an extra survival adaptation to have greater neuroplasticity, either genetic or epigenetic in origin. This would, in my opinion, go a long way to explain why not all children who experience extreme repeated trauma develop DID -- not everyone has the neuro-flexibility to take dissociation this extra step. *** NOTE ***: This is just an idea that occurred to me while watching these videos, based on my rather limited knowledge of neuro-physiology. Maybe someone with access to an expert can bring it up to them. In other words, I may be completely off-base on this. Just thought I should share it in case it can help someone. Oh, I forgot to add, this would also explain the headaches that go with the switch -- that rewiring would likely be painful. It also reminds me of in electronics, an FPGA -- that is, to put it very over-simplified, hardware that can have its functioning reprogrammed. This may be too technical for this particular forum, but I don't have a better place to put it.
This covered many of the symptoms really well. I'm glad you mentioned demonic possession. I was told by some Christians that I was possessed and even had some pray to try to exorcise demons from me. It was very traumatic but at the time I was desperate for some relief from the craziness that was my life. I was hearing voices and self-harming but didn't know I had DID. Once I became aware of some of my alters, I realized what was happening. Thankfully I had a really great therapist who helped me work through things. I caution anyone who thinks that alters are demons to educate themselves. Thanks to Kyle for doing the video, he did a great job.
Now a days I am like addicted to this channel. I am so sorry for what happened to your childhood.
I don’t have DID (as far as I know) but the way you were described the foggy memory loss feelings and how hard it is to feel like your life matters when you’re not even sure of what was real and what you dreamed up hit me hard. I’ve always known that the big gaps of memory loss were a self defense mechanism from my childhood but I always felt alone about it. People always think It’s insane how much I don’t remember and I’m more amazed at how much others do. It’s kind of nice to know I’m not alone in with this “grim” feeling ❤️
When the video started I was so confused but then I realized it was Kyle and not Chloe, he has a point with the makeup thing though 😂
Thank you, Kyle! You explained it well and Chloe added the couple of definition inserts. You all work so well together! I am learning much you are helping in my learning.
i think i might have some form of DID but i wasn’t abused as a child (bad things have happened like death of a family member and constant stress from both my anxiety disorder and stuff but i don’t think it counts as trauma because people have it worse than me) but i also don’t remember much of my childhood. the ‘alters’ i have usually don’t fully come out unless they are needed and when they do i can usually remember some of what they did but it doesn’t feel like i did it i guess?? my voice changes when they come out too, Jake’s voice is deep and Mallory’s voice is higher and her way of speech is different. when im really dissociated i can hear talking in my head sometimes and everything goes wonky and idk how to explain it. im only 15 (soon going to be 16) and im scared to talk to my therapist about this because i feel paranoid and think “oh well what if you’re just faking all of this??” and i don’t know what to do.. thank you if you read all of this, i just need some help.
Hello honey, first of all - it doesn't matter if someone else has it worse than you, your feelings and trauma are VALID. Other peoples experiences dont discount your own. Its okay to use that word. A death of a family member is traumatic, but unless it happened before the age of 8 it wouldnt have caused DID, but if you already have it it would have contributed to it. The idea of DID is that if you did experience repeated trauma or abuse as a child, you wouldn't remember it, but i dont want to scare you :) It takes an approximate 7-10 years on average in the mental health treatment system before getting a correct diagnosis of DID, as its surrounded by stigma even amoungst professionals. If you do have it, it can be a fight to get the right help. But I must urge you darling, please do get in contact with a professional and explain your symptoms, or if youre not comfortable enough with that yet join some support groups on facebook. I would reccommend the group "Living with Dissociative Identity Disorder" for you. Its where we started asking questions. Message any of us if you need help dear, and good luck. -Sally xxx
you may have a type of DDNOS! it's like DID, but you don't really "lose time" or not know what your alters are doing. basically youre still co-conscious with your alters! it's definitely good to talk to your therapist about it!
YellowChild oof , it doesn't have to be abuse. My trauma was medical! Its basically anything severe and inescapable. And, my alters don't front much, they go through me. OSDD is another diagnosis which is DID but without amnesia, because the alters don't front as intensely,
OSDD I'd the new term for DDNOS. I am conscious of what my other are doing but in back, kinda. It's pretty much DID without the amnesia.
I was diagnosed with DDNOS several years ago. I recently found out the name had changed. Dissociative disorder not otherwise specified became other specified dissociative disorder.
YellowChild there are two forms of DID: overt and covert. Overt is where you assume a different personality, however you are well aware but you don't have control of it. Covert is the one where you lose yourself completely.
"If you're going to make makeup make it tastey"
Why is this such a mood?
I saw your guys interview with Anthony and now I'm going to binge all of your videos.
Stupid question
1: do y’all drive a car
2: if so have you ever switched while driving or switch to a little
idk about them but, My mom had DID (she passed a few years ago), and there was a field with horses that we'd drive past. And one of her littles, 4, who switched out the most out of all of her alters, would get really excited and jump out, "The horsies are out!" and a few times the grip on the steering wheel would slack or sometimes tilt towards the field a bit. I'd have to call out to my mom so she could keep driving us. Once my dad was like, "Yes, the horsies are out, but you need to let Miss Karen drive right now." and 4 pouted but (thankfully) accepted it. Most of the time it wasn't a problem though.
Emma’s Life some littles can drive. Driving is mainly a muscle memory thing like riding a bike
I was going to be a psychiatrist but ultimately took a different route. I’ve forgotten how much I love studies and information about disorders and things. Thank you for reminding me that there are people going through things that little of us know or understand. The first step in moving towards ridding our world of false/harmful cliches or ideas of mental health is to inform the public. Your system is beautiful and your work on this platform is more valuable than I think some recognize.
there are four-five voices I hear often and I've even had full conversations with myself. I have a classmate who says I talked with her often in elementary and I don't remember talking to her at all and I feel so bad for forgetting.
I just discovered your channel today. Thank you all for making this content possible. I can’t imagine how hard it must be to coordinate between all of you to record and edit these videos. It’s already hard doing everything on your own (as one individual), but all of you alters deserve an applause for learning to work together despite the hardships you have to deal with everyday (or every moment in conscience to be more specific). I’m learning a lot thanks to these videos. Will binge watch your whole channel. Lots of love from Venezuela 💟
Hello Chloe, I was wondering if alters know they’re alters or they all think they’re the host.
We all know we are alters now
Was there a time alters did not know they where alters then??
yes
How do you recommend I talk to my alters and find out who’s who and so on. I get switches migraines etc. I get stressed and start getting moody emotional about things etc then get tired and it’s hard with friends I dno how I feel
@@Ohkeh640 my therapist had me start by creating a time line (as best I could), with lots of empty spaces for alters to fill in as they wanted. Also, my therapist recommended journaling. That's when I realized why my hand writing changes so drastically at times. Both worked pretty well with us. Some systems even have a written contracts, about what's allowes and what isn't (we don't).
Not too long ago my mom and brother were talking about a dog that i had. I have zero recollection of this dog. That made me realize that there is very little that i remember up until my early teens. Just occasional flashes, small glimpses of certain events, occurrences or people.
YOUR OLD VIDEOS ARE BACK YAYYYY
“I’m what you’ve got” no Kyle don’t say that - so good to have you always! 🥰
Argh I'm watching this series, finally (even though I've been watching you for a bit now) and it's almost equal parts triggering and a relief to hear these symptoms. Thank you. I'm making a checklist, haha.. Also, today was the first time I said out loud to a professional about my thoughts that I might have DID. It was very emotional and weird, but the professional said I should definitely get into diagnostic interviews and stuff, and validated my thoughts as being legit . felt good. I don't know why but for some reason I feel that I should tell you. You all have been such a big part of my dive into self-realization. Hmm, yes. Dozing off now. Thanks 💖💜💙
I think you are doing an incredible service to people with your condition. I hope your platform keeps growing. After watching several of your videos, it dawned on me that I think I knew a girl with DID in high school. I had a couple of different classes with her and I always thought she was odd because she was so different in each subject. Talked to her a few times but I always thought she was odd because her opinions would differ dramatically from conversation to conversation and she would “act” (that’s what I thought it was) as though she could not recall previous conversations sometimes. I thought she was doing that for attention, to be “eccentric “. After you explained that Kyle was taking science and Nadia art, it makes sense to me.
There were rumors that she was engaging in self-harming behavior, and abuse at home. There was an investigation at some point, but nothing came about because she apparently contradicted herself in her statements. This also makes sense to me know after I heard about you talk about the different roles of alters, and how some will try to keep others from talking about the abuse. I don’t know what happened to her after high school, but during that time she definitely did not get the help she needed. I believe if your videos would have been available back then a lot of people, including myself would treated her differently.
I love Kyle hahaha he is my kind of people xD
The description of depersonalization and derealization was so spot on and I’ve been trying so hard to figure out how to explain how it feels. I thought I was crazy for so long because I’m almost constantly in that kinda state and it felt like no one I talked to about it really understood what I was talking about
“MaKe It TaStY” I feel you Kyle
Hi!
I started watching your videos a few weeks ago when my doctor suggested I might have DID. I've now been 'properly' diagnosed and I wanted to thank you for making such thoughtful and accurate videos! I have a 'milder' version of DID (I only have a few alters, though likely I'll develop more, I'm told) and I'm new to all of this.
My system and I are trying to get settled into our new way of life and these videos are very helpful and accurate! I showed your channel to my friend and she said it was very helpful to her. You're all very nice and I appreciate you sharing this with us!
Switching is still very awkward for us. We'd been doing it for years (mostly Zoe, {who, if I had to I'd compare to Sally} and I.) Your videos are greatly appreciated. They cheer us up when we've had a stressful day, and some of your tips on how to manage the system effectively are definitely working!
Thank you!
-Ella
Your videos are super informative and really fun to watch - keep it up!
Thank you!
It is SO COOL to watch older videos and see the difference, you guys improved A LOT. I am so proud of you all❤️
"if you’re going to make your own line make it tasty" the SHADE lmao
Had to pause to shoot this comment but when you went into "depersonalization" and "derealization" it really hit me hard. I've got tears rolling down my face as I type right now because I finally feel understood on that level I've been craving my whole life. You all have such a way (your own way) with words and describe the way these things feel in an understandable, educational and real way.
I haven't been diagnosed with DID. In fact, I've just recently (in the past year) started looking into it. I was diagnosed with PTSD and severe GAD (generalized anxiety disorder) at ten, coupled with mild depressive episodes and bouts of agoraphobia/social anxiety. However, I felt like all those diagnoses were great, but never really explained the problem.
I was scheduled to begin medication for my deepening PTSD and anxiety when I was seventeen and had some trauma going on in my life, but was terrified to take the medication and never filled the prescriptions.
Lately, I've been feeling like I've been getting worse again. I can't remember hardly anything at all, feel spacey and 'not myself' for days/weeks/months at a time, and have extreme and excessive mood swings accompanied by 'headaches' (which I can't really call headaches. They feel like headaches, but don't hurt like them).
I have two toddlers and I want to take action and feel more in control of my life. Your videos really brought some light to this perplexing disorder, and now I feel much more inclined and determined to go and get help for these problems I'm having. I don't want to feel ashamed anymore.
(Sorry for the super long comment)
That book thing, not being able to keep up. Ahh its so annoying and frustrating. Now I know why it's happening. Thank you btww.
@Vishal Upadhyay - same. We've mostly given up on reading anything we can't read in one short sitting, for this reason.
Got both diaths pierced last summer. Game changer. Still feel a pressure and sometimes sleepy with it. But seriously, worth a shot, please let us kno if it works for u because it could help others. And we know yous all over that.
Could be just a placebo but defos worth a shot. Took about 6 months to heal FYI
Hope it helps
Yous vids have really helped discover things unrealised
Ur a hero to me tbh
All parts of u
Thank you so much for sharing. Ur so brave xx
Keep doing it
Its really helpful and bravery is contagious
With love xx
You and your alters are awesome for sharing like this. I have experienced most of the same symptoms. Very confusing for years until I found a great therapist who helped us so much to learn to live with each other. There are many of us but primarily 7 main personalities. It is nice to know there are other's like use. Thankyou for sharing.
amazing I haven`t watched this videos in a couple months, and because I've been having periods of depersonalization again I started rewatching and without knowing or remembering anything I recognized that Kyle was Kyle immediately
Kyle hitting you with those lipstick truth bombs
Hi! I'm new to the channel. Just wanted to say thank you for sharing your experiences and spreading awareness, all of yous 💖 lovely to meet you Kyle, and I can't wait to meet everyone else!
Kyle is me when it comes to makeup. I'm a new subscriber and I love you already
15:40 to 17:00
I just had your channel recommended to me. I'm very ignorant about dissociation and my disorder in general. And you just quoted what I've told my therapist and how I've felt my entire life. Almost word for word. Gave me a little goose bump lol
Aw you're so much like ed from multiplicity and me! You're adorable
Hah tah mate, similar accent maybe but defo a v diff personality lol
-Kyle
DissociaDID haha yeah it's your accent and your demeanour sort of at least for me. Anyways I like your explination of things in the video, it's pretty good for anyone who isn't familiar with DID.
Well glad it helped mate! Tah for that
When I started watching your channel I had just seen something that referenced DID. I didn’t know what the character had and if it was fictional so I went to find out. I also had thought that it couldn’t be like what they had shown as an example, so I wanted to know what it was really, if it was real. That’s when I found this channel. This seemed really remarkable to me and amazing just how the brain works. The fact that people would want to fake that they had it really dissapointed me. I found myself recently realizing that I felt off, I mean, I don’t want to be the person who assumes they have every disorder they come across and self diagnose, but when I told my friends about the fact that I dissociate a lot and when it occurred while I was with them I got replies like, “umm... are you okay?” And “are you sure your okay? That’s not normal...” the thing is dissociating is really normal for me. I dissociate a lot. All the time, for seemingly no reason. For example I once dissociated for 15 minutes while looking at grass. I couldn’t remember what I was trying to do afterward and the person I was hanging out with claimed that they where calling my name. I did in my past experiance trauma, the trauma was emotional. It went untreated, and to this day, haunts me. I remember only a moment, then it just stops. I don’t remember anything other than short clips almost like photos that are really clear up until I turned 10 or so. That might just be my memory though. I often find myself wondering where things (especially clothing) come from and have no memory of getting them ever, plus most of the time I can’t see myself ever wearing anything like it. I have never had anyone walk up to me, and me not knowin them, but I frequently find myself feeling like I am watching myself, especially in stressful situations. My family says I’m very disconnected and elsewhere very often, and miss a lot of things. I do hear kind of commentary as well sometimes, but that could just be me.
Thank you for reading my comment! :)
I really liked this video by Kyle, I learned not only about the symptoms but also the difficulties that come with some of those symptoms, and I think that's important.
Thank you mate 👌
it is so crazy going back to these old videos that i watched when they first came out. i feel like overtime he definitely became more comfortable and natural infront of the camera and really just was himself, i love kyle so much and everyone else in the system and seeing them grow and change with the channel and all that has gone down, love u all! xx
You’re a magical unicorn and you’re so special just remember you are meant to be here and you’re amazing I love you all stay brave
In high school, I remember losing huge chunks of time. Like, I'd be standing at my locker & then I'd be in a classroom without traveling there, & my friends would ask what the hell was wrong with me, & I'd find out it was Thursday instead of Monday. Yes, I suffered extreme abuse from age 3. I do remember chanting, "I'm not here. I'm not here, I'm not here," over and over as my abuser entered the room. So pretty textbook, I guess. I knew most of my alters, but I worked hard to keep anyone from finding out. I've learned to sort of crowd everyone together so there's a sort of higher consciousness, & I don't let anyone come to the front & assert themselves anymore. Don't know if that's healthier or not.
No its not healthy at all. I'm so so sorry what happened to you but your alters are here to help you and if you refuse to let them front even tho it can be very scary not doing things and missing days you must treat them respectfully as they exist the same as you and they are as real as you and me and everything else. They have emotions and feelings and thoughts and wants and needs just like you and me, talk to them like using apps to have you and them talk, use paper notes, diaries or books with blank pages and more and you can also talk to each other when one or more is co con. You must let alters front also since they may start hating you and do terrible things because of being ignored and thought of as terrible. Care for them as they share the same body you are in, don't hurt them and share the body, good luck and I again am so so sorry for the trauma that happened to you. It starting at 3 is absolutely insane and just so shocking. This is from an alter in a system of 2001 alters - Ash
Hello there weather it’s Chloe or another alter reading this I need some insight
So when I dissociate, it happens for a long amount of time. I remember sitting down for church and by the time I snapped back into “consciousness” so to speak it was done. Church lasts two hours.. Another time it had happened from Lunch *1:00* to the start of dinner*5:30*I have the feeling of depersonalization and derealization like you have suggested the symptoms are and some out of body experiences but I don’t understand what it is that I’m feeling. I feel a sense of worthlessness sometimes but than other times I feel overly confident. I’m not sure if I have DID but some things that Kyle explains here I feel, is there something that matches how I feel or what I do? Or am I just not feeling it sometimes? And also at a certain point you had explained that you had hearing voices before you were diagnosed with DID, I have that too and I have female voices and different accents. Everyone tells me that talking in your head is either me going crazy or completely normal, so I’m confused. I find it uncomfortable for me to open up to parents about my personal life and mental life so for me admiring that I have to see someone is hard.
This sounds a lot like DID honey, look into it if you feel comfortable
Thanks for advice
I just didn’t want to be overreacting or have me suspect something that’s not fully correct
Also the fact that I don’t have gaps in my child memories
And I haven’t experience any abuse of any kind in my childhood either as unfortunately many people with DID do
And, yes, you give me much to think about re my own life and memories, early childhood is sort of blurry and I have just a few memories. But I was a spacey kid with a very intense, unhappy mom. Maybe I just shut out the unhappy stuff mainly. As an adult I have had to work on being more aware of details in my physical surroundings. I think it is important to savor and appreciate life and beauty around me.
Imagine coming back as a tree😂😂 I’m sorry Kyle cracks me up like all the time
I've watched all your recent videos and just stumbled on this older one. Definitely identify with all of these experiences. We've been diagnosed 10 years and it something we are just coming to terms with and really gaining system cooperation and communication in the last year. Your channel along with Multiplicity and Me and the Entropy System has helped us immensely.
I’ve seen several videos now and I’m so glad that your system is educating about DID. I don’t personally have it but I have other mental health issues and I know how important it is for people to feel understood and connected to others in similar situations.
I do have a question, during your life (for example high school or university) would alters go through life unaware of Chloe or did the various alters know that they were alters? From what I think I understand, each alter was living their own life unaware of the others, right? I’d love clarification if you can!
Some knew (me), some didn't, some like Nadia were in complete denial - Kyle
I had a student with DID. It was pretty incredible yet heartbreaking to watch her go through her days but she was and is such a warrior and so were her six Alters. I will never ever forget that experience and when her Alters would come forward sometimes I was not able to notice immediately and I would just say hey hun. And they knew to say their name.