My husband and I were watching this video by chance when he said ‘I think he’s talking about a study we conducted recently’. Looking at the credits, sure enough you referenced his work. Thank you - well reported and accurately assessed.
Not entirely. I believe the most dangerous people are the ones who don't even care to fake sincerity. They just enjoy the complete effect of their essence on everyone else.
Been in jail a few times when I was younger with a drinking problem. You know who to talk to and who to leave alone just by their eyes. Just comes instinctively
I went for suspended license. They put me in a cell with the states most wanted and a guy that stabbed his girlfriend. Turns out one was a friend from a decade earlier, and the other rented from a friend of mine for over a decade. I was pretty safe.
@@jefferyharper5720 don't know a out that Jeffery, where I'm from, anyone who stabs a women isn't looked upon too kindly. I've done time in one of worst jails in scotland
@@jasonlevy1221 perhaps, but this was county. No trials yet. That would come once sentenced and in a state or federal pen. Not my choice who they put me in a cell with. He rented from a friend of mine.
@@jefferyharper5720 relax bro, didn't mean anythi g by it, just wondering what a guy like that and states most wanted doing in a county jail, isn't that for minor offences? like driving offences, shoplifting etc
What is that blank stare that you see from a crazy person. Like a hollowness before an act of anger or violence. Like no one's home stare. I have seen this in someone. It's very disturbing.
It’s real, I know exactly what you’re talking about. Just because there aren’t a lot of research-backed studies on it, that doesn’t totally invalidate your experience.
kim Brody I have a young family member that has the blank stare, ie, when he’s looking at his fiancé for long periods at a time. He is also on meds that affect pupillary dilation like atropine and Belladonna made Italian women that much more beautiful with full big pupils. Narcotics can construct to pinpoint pupils. My family member was just diagnosed as a Sociopath, so stare on!
I’ve seen it multiple times in my life. Had the hair stand up behind my neck. Sheer fear instilled in me. I use to be a realtor. One occasion happened doing a open house. He asked me where the bedrooms were. Another time was another in home sales position. The guy tried blocking the front door with a chair and blasted the TV and Radio. When I came out of the bathroom I saw what he did. I promised to date him. Gave him a BS line. He let me go. I’m no longer in sales and will never do it. Predators with shark eyes. Yes. It’s real. Once you’ve seen it and you know your in danger. You will never forget.
I’ve seen that “if looks could kill” look from a guy I was passing in an elevator. I wouldn’t call it blank but it was as if his eye’s were “dead”, like such deep concentrated hatred and anger and something even more evil and indescribable (as if he had lost all sense of hope and he didn’t give a crap) that it was if his eyes were deep holes of blackness. It was so unnerving as I’d never seen that before or since in my life and it made the hairs stand up on my body. I also met a psychopath that had a very strange nervous energy and sweat. It had a horrible pheromone scent almost reminded me of male cat spray. And it would waft on and off. It was the strangest thing. It’s not just their stare it can also be there over excited, nervous predatory scent. This is when they are actively casing you but haven’t attacked yet. This has been my anecdotal experience.
It depends on the type of blank stare it is. There are several medicsl reasons for those blank stares and a couple of spiritual ones as well. Not all stares are created equal. The shark eyed empty yet intense look is one like Charles Manson used to get on his face. His was quite type 2 chaotic psychopathic criminal stare. Jeffery Dahmer, also a murderer, had a different stare, one less intense but one like an artist might have in deep contemplation of how they will dismember your body. I suspect they are having quite a mental conversation with self at that point. If its you they are looking at, I suggest you run! With both of those stares its as if something not human is looking through their eyes. I have seen both, and variation of them with the "dupers delight" grin. They might look absent but they are deep in thought about what they should do next. You are lucky enough to happen to be there and survive, you too could have been in his plan for fun that day. Then there are the dissociative "fuge" stares, and neuro disorders stares too, where the lights are on but no one is home for a few minutes. These types of stares are random, and generally brief. They can be caused by neuro disorders, PTSD, Hypnosis, Medications, and Severe Mental/Physical Trauma like in DID.
My mother sister and I all have larger pupils. None of us are mentally ill, psychopaths, or substance abusers. I'm told often how beautiful my eyes are. I don't think people even notice that my pupils are a little larger than most. They can still see that my eyes are blue. So I don't feel it's fair to imply that all people who have large pupils are defective in some way. lol
I once worked with a psychopath/serial predator. Everyone loved working with him, except for one female. My friend absolutely hated him and she could not explain why. When the case unfolded I made the connection his victims resembled her. I believe it was his "predator gaze" that made her dislike him. I am the complete opposite of her. He went under my radar because he did not look at me with predator eyes.
Honestly I think people can recognize psychopaths by facial expressions. It's not as simple as pupil dilation, and it's difficult to measure. But if you make eye contact with one, it can set off an uncanny valley response.
My mother's eyes terrified me. I found it difficult to not fall in with people like her unable to recognize dangers another person would. I had no lack of fear until she died in her late 70's. Then peace finally came.
I can read people's force field. If someone gives me the evil eye, even if I do not actually see it, I can feel it, I usually confront them and let them know that I am well aware of what they are doing. I can feel them trying to steal my Force....I know it sounds weird but I died when I was young fell thru ice and drowned, and I've always been a a little weird.
My grandfather has those eyes, he is very smart, he doesn't care about anyone only himself, I remember when I was little and he saw me like that I knew something was wrong and he was about to say something to humiliate me, he would have this eyes, they would look brighter sharper clearer that made me feel insecure and afraid. I can recognize that stare now easily in others.
My birth dad has schizophrenia. I've seen pictures of him "before" and "after". It's haunting, his eyes were bright and then only a couple years later, he looks hollow, not with it. The eyes are truly the window to the soul.
My experience is they may not have comforting eye contact- but, rather a cold look combined with a smirk or laugh. I found this very creepy in a sibling.
It’s anxiety. Also it’s projection. So many times people think I’m evil and smirking when they look at me from the side of my face. My face naturally looks like this. They keep saying “why are you smirking” this is what actually starts to make me smirk. I can’t control it. If I was in a dark alley with a gang of people looking to hurt me, I might not give them the normal response and it might be worse
The smile. They learn at a young age that is easier to suck people into their little realm of control if at first they appear friendly. I can't stand psychopaths. I find them creepy and manipulative. They make the hair stand up on the back of my neck, and keep me on edge, always aware of where my knife or gun are.
If you've ever had the misfortune of being with a narc, go back & look at the photos you took of them. Look at their eyes..Lights are on but nobody's home in there.
Yes!! In my situation, his eyes were already really big as it is. But when he would go into an episode, his pupils will dilate so huge, it’s like his eyes were black. And he had hazel eyes. He ended up going to jail before we met and I was looking at his mugshot and you can tell there was nothing there in his eyes. No emotions, nothing. Just blank.
@@joanturner-radford6028 - Yes. My ex-husband's eyes were always either blank or glittering. I avoided the glittery eyes. Both were disturbing, however. @OP.
It happened to me once. That is, I recognized a psychopath the minute our eyes locked. It very quickly turned into a scary and dangerous situation that I only got out of by the mercy of a third party, a complete stranger, who stepped in to save me.
@@kkech1 Ill save you the trouble. "He was cold, emotionless, he looked at me the same way a predator looks at a prey. It was very uneasy, it's just something you feel."
Eyes numb and void of emotion, you see he has no need for anyone in his life but you also see he has an interest towards you because hes looking at you.
@@smackdashitoutchu7755 LOL at people here talking about Psychos as if they're some other-worldly beings, or have special powers. I never have problems with them. I can spot them literally a mile away, and I subtley let them know that im on to them and to not try any funny business
How do u think u are able to spot them? Is it something they do or say or is it just a six sense or intuition Why would u let them know that u see them why not just act like u don't see them instead of letting them be aware. What do u gain by achkwoleging their presence?
Doesn't mean they're a psychopath. Could just mean she's a negative Nancy. Psychos are unlikely to pick on people unless they have a goal in mind while doing that
I have also heard psychologists say that wrinkles around the eyes will not be as pronounced in the aging process due to decreased stress response. It's an interesting proposition.
I watched movie about one study about violent children with conduct disorder. All of them had history of abusing animals and showed criminal tendencies plus little or no empathy. Their brain scans detected that their amygdala doesn’t function properly and they suffer from low ability to concentrate. Ironically that manifest itself in hyper activity. Basically they need more stimuli to get excited. The scientists found strong correlation between attention deficit in early childhood and the criminal behaviour in the adulthood in those individuals. And here’s the bomb. There are some studies that suggest it’s reversible. That attention deficit is the result of brain damage and the brain can be trained to prevent future criminal “career” as an psychopath. I guess from that comes and the psychopathic cold stare. They just can’t process the situations very well and their “reptile” part of the brain takes the lead. It’s all about survival but not about social norms and emotion. Thank you doctor Grande, you were wonderful again.
So do you think ADHD kids are just psychopaths in early stages? I mean without drug treatment will they grow up to be a psychopathic family annihilator?
Shady Willow I don’t know. It’s hard to predict the future but certainly they are predisposed. There were other symptoms in their behaviour that manifested themselves as an early signs as lying, stealing (without the need to do it), violence against other children, siblings etc. Basically breaking all the social norms at very early age without no regret. Are they going to become psychopathic?! I don’t know but one thing for sure all scientists agree is that they will become adults with violent tendencies. Also they are still arguing is it the result of brain trauma during the delivery or there is genetic component. I believe the truth is somewhere in between. I believe it’s reversible if cough in time while the brain is still developing. All the brain scans showed that the neurones don’t communicate well and that’s the reasons for the ADHD. If we can prevent future violent or criminal behaviour of these children, then why not worth trying?! I believe the prevention is the best choice but these methods are still controversial and they will need time to be proven. In the future it might turn out that the psychopathy is neurological problem. Not just personality that can’t be changed. But here comes the heavy question for the parents. Are they ready to put the stigma on their children for being problematic in order to help them to develop as regular respectful members of the society?! That’s a really harsh decision and needs big amount of self denial and sacrifice.
Its NOT just pupil size. Jessica Chastain's character Lucille Sharpe in Crimson peak captures psychopath eyes perfectly. They also have 'busy eyes'. A Holistic Dr. I worked with 40 yrs ago taught me to spot problematic patients.
I know exactly what you mean!! Seen a video where a psychopath was in a group and people had to guess who it is. The guy was going from super nice and charming to checking everyone’s mimics and gestures to 'prepare' the next lie. My ex had those eyes too, he looked like he was searching for something all the time. And the eyes were so cold… so lonely. So yea, busy eyes means they are scanning their surroundings to adapt like a chameleon.
Not just pupil dilation, but the "wild eyed" look where the entire iris is visible. Not counting people with Graves' disease of course. I'd think it would indicate a very level of high anxiety or stress in normal people, but others that seem to look that way all the time, especially when conversing with others.
An individual with adhd or depression will typically have low levels of dopamine and serotonin. Disorders are collections of symptoms, some may be comorbid, some may be related to hormones or neurotransmitters (disordered function or damage). I wonder if one day, we might have a better grasp on the brain without labels for overlapping problems. Just some of my musings.
Exactly only proves dialation has nothing to do with only threat. It's muscle memory in a way. Your body is prepping potential energy. The pupils dialate from smiling faces just who the fuck doesn't love being happy?
@@bluelover929 i have severe deprasion and adhd, for some reason my eyes are always dialated, so much so that i always get tested when im pulled over bc they think im high
I've been curious for a while about people who are sexually attracted to psychopaths/sociopaths. I can easily imagine, for example, the so-called "psychopathic stare" being misread as an erotically charged stare.
No my opinion is that people specially females, are attracted to psychos or "bad boys" because the idea that a horrible person only likes you and only treats you well out of all the other people, is kinda hot.
@@nnn.nnn2 - Not "especially females" since men tend to be attracted to "bad girls." It just hasn't become a trope like it has for women. Of course it is an undesirable trope. Men actively chase "bad girls" and then call them "crazy." A caveat: they only chase the pretty ones. A woman can be rotten to the core and men will still chase her if she is good looking.
@@nnn.nnn2 thats a poor analysis… although what is often called the female gaze usually has a component of finding people attractive for a certain aesthetic fulfillment they might provide through certain characteristics (like being reckless or a “bad boy”)
When their eyes turn black ...walk away , no matter what , leave the room get out of there. Last thing you want is to gwt into an argument , its like fighting with the exorsist
I feel like some people (not everyone) can tell a psychopath by their eyes, but not necessarily due to pupil dilation. There’s something else I’ve seen, that’s difficult to describe.
Its swagger baby .... or lack of in the lame types... and micro expressions u subconsciously pick up. I study a bit into it. Got to protect and perfect the craft u know. ; )
I’ve seen men who get attracted to me and they give me this “look”.... and we both understand the “look” and if I’m attracted I like the “look”. But then there are other men who give me this “look” and it’s not a normal look of attraction, it’s more like two big black circles of death like ⚫️⚫️ Almost as if their whole eyes turn black and I suddenly feel very on guard and ready to run at any point
It's how a predator looks at prey. Predatory animals watch their prey with this look. It communicates no emotion and makes objects of both parties to each other. I am not unfamiliar with being the focal point of this look.
Regardless of pupil size, they will often give an object (person) of their interest the “predatory stare”. Often, directly into your eyes if they have a sexual or romantic interest in you.
What Dr. Grande said about how psychopaths typically are on the defensive when they see happy faces? I have a theory on that, formed from when I was living in a sober living house, (I have an apartment now), I did observe hostility on one man's part whenever I started getting my confidence back. Being an obsessive thinker, having puzzled over the reason why, I came up with my own theory, that maybe if his parents were sadistic, he noticed them seeming happy just before they got abusive, because sadists would be anticipating the cruelty they were planning to do (i.e. Sadists get enjoyment from cruelty) and the child would learn to associate happy expressions with hostility.?
i was watching a documentary about Crack Cocaine in America and one thing I noticed strikes me like this former drug dealer said if someone was to tell a funny joke you would have to be like Smerk or be like Huh why because it would be a sign of weakness like you couldn't dance in the club cause the Drug Dealers would see you having a good time you gotta be shown to be Emotionless
My friend has sexual sadism he's very very very very cruel but he said psychopathy is about evilness not cruelty, liking being a rich liar not a bad person
I thought this would be about the "I want to watch you bleed to death in a bathtub" look. Friends described a coworker this way and, without knowing who it was, I immediately recognized who they were talking about when I saw him. My limbic system AND amygdala told me to stay the hell away from him.
@@rainmanj9978 it's like that feeling from Training Day with them Gang Members playing Cards and you feel like that Police Officer there and you notice that Alonzo car is gone if you ever chilled with a Psychopath you know the vibes are gonna be off you gonna see red flags how do I know this cause this person buying me beer when I was 17 he was in prison for assault and I blocked him on Facebook immediately when I got home i looked at my brother like that was horrible experience we did thought that our life was in danger I think he was trying to Drug us and Lord knows what he was on we smoked weed with him but he was a Pill head people on drugs are unpredictable
My ex had the most intense stare I’ve seen only on serial killers mugshots. I just thought that he’s a weirdo but surprise, he got diagnosed with aspd two years into relationship and a lot of things made sense
my friend is a murder he said he's not a psychopath nor other killers are, he has beautiful big brown eyes other people say that too, you should believe me and in him
I have brain trauma; can be very easy for me to lose control of my emotions but I have a conscience. I wrestle strongly with this daily. Im in a constant state of dissociation from so many traumas and living in an environment where healing isn't possible. All alone. It's essentially a prison that I want to break free from without any clear idea what step 1 is. If you're a Godly person, pray for me.
My dad is a psycopath. I could be wrong. Some times he had a look in his eyes like a shark. No dept.when that look would come about . something bad came about.
They look into your eyes but see no one in front of them as if they focus on your existance, but do not look through your entire being, not that yes you know what they are seeing, hold on direct gaze face to face? Not quite 'dead behind the eyes' for them, but as if they look directly at you as much like both alive, but as if you are dead to them instead? It's looking at evil, I have two psych(one not certain but too 100% narcissist to just creep into barely psychopathy. But this is the one I'm more likely to win - physically wise I'm clear, although the other could easily physical overpower strength being male, my brother and he is over six foot, prime peak of male in age, I'm a lot younger yet he not be scary. There's my near tiny extreme opposite in five foot (I'm mid two but am weight wise on muscular here certainty here physically not what this look makes me know she could somehow 'get me' at ANY moment, this creepy sense I do believe when you know around the actual living in the knowledge with a true psychopath, you develop the 'sense' which backed up in science enough to say exactly likely to the truth be repeated in the people whom gave true fla response, they have represented equally in population to have a psychopath around them, in knowing them like that of a family living home, even when nothing to ever be claimed to know they may as most likely also is myth in them being all serial sadist blah, no, they are least represented in the numbers of jail members to be knowing they don't all kill, or do and simply not caught lol however it is a stare which it's not fear response or chills, it's knowing both them fully to know fear in fully life or death too, unrelated, it's just a knowing they are not seeing what you see, you know they see nothing of real people like remorse if they kill you you look that would still be exactly that same state as they give me this. She's also failed to try and fail twice already so jokes on her failure there though. But true and as obvious no way proving my word true, it is, but this is what I look at and know I'm looking at something, and it be when up close and finally she looks right at me, from say across a room, fleeting acknowledgement she look normal, then there's these specific repeated and not ever as induced by naturally be positioned somehow to then have only times, but you know this, it's not a reaction, or feeling as just like a knowing of something in this look. And abusive people, met many, not one be clinically psychopathic however... Wired. I think it has weight to be reported as likely must have some knowledge by living with, even as possibly not even "know" them for whom they are, it is as instinctual but need nurture, due to nothing of only populations correlate, however nothing causal, but repeated correctly in strangers for correct, missed first correct test, missed and more at chance only if identify at random. As perfectly the chance of this not be explained nor seen more into this first be a study read about in the actual ability to cite this, but nothing since, meh life is so crazy huh
Quit blaming your parents for what is entirely your own fault, coward. Treat your parents with respect and quit labeling them psychopaths, you spoiled brat.
@@SkillUpMobileGaming Prove to all of us that it's the original poster's fault, oh knowledgable one. Unless you personally know the original poster, his father, and what his life was like behind closed doors, you have no clue, period. You can't prove it's his fault, that's he's a spoiled brat or disrespects his parents simply because you were not there and don't know him. All you are doing is making ignorant assumptions based on no information.
When I was struggling with my abusive, narcissistic husband, I wondered if my husband was a psychopath. He abused me for years and wanted me dead. I saw on TH-cam a psychiatrist say to look at a sociopath’s driver’s license and see if that person had bright blue shark eyes. He Did and I gasped. He had bright blue shark eyes and a straight smile. Years later, I’m divorced and my ex as caused me so much pain and Distress. I suffer from PTSD from Narcissistic abuse. He is a narcissistic personality disordered man and used me in a 20 year marriage The narcissist will murder your soul by cheating on you, lying and betraying you I am done
Yes.... When I open the mailbox everyday and read all the friggin bills...I can literally feel my pupils dilate so large... That all the words numbers and dollar signs get sucked into my brain by the black hole my pupils make.... Very unpleasant stimuli!!!
Hello, I have a question regarding NPD. If a person exhibits all of the traits of a covert narcissist within the family but is very much a co dependent outside with strangers, what does that make them? I know these people, they are common, people pleasing grovelers trying to please every one they meet but vicious and callous behind closed doors with family. It is not as if they are lying either, ie they genuinely care about strangers and want to help them but are cruel to their children. Is it typical for narcissists to be this way or are these people not narcissists at all but co dependents? I am confused. Please address this.
They are covert narcissists. Their behaviour outside of the home is their 'good person mask' and their virtue signalling behaviour. Don't be fooled but realise they are disordered. Outside of the home also they won't have many close or good friends because they put others down etc and eventually people catch onto them. They don't truly care about anyone but themselves. Don't be too sympathetic. Protect your interests at all times. They want to be served and catered to at all times. They constantly play the victim. Try not to confront them...then you'll see their true face and they will do what they can to slander you and make your life a misery. Keep a distance while knowing what you know. Ideally if there are children they should be taught that there's a problem with their parent and not with themselves. It can be very harmful to the scapegoat child/ children. But there isn't really a way to live happily with them. It will always remain dysfunctional. Eventually most people abandon them or keep limited and low contact.
yeah no they don't genuinely care about people outside the home. They might convince themselves they are caring with their bullshit stories, but they use it all for supply and reinforcement of their "good guy" persona. It's a mask.
They’re trying to acquire narcissistic supply from those they “respect” or consider “socially-valuable.” The family always gets shit on. That’s how most narcs operate because being fake is damn TIRING,even for a narc. The mask has to come off, sometime.
The codependency fits the narc because they actually have a REALLY low self esteem the victim role (as a covert) or the grandiosity are both put as protection above the emptiness inside. The emptiness is usually caused by a trauma of some sort. Source: been there. Change is possible, even though it is hard. Following things worked for me: - i wanted change - i started to learn how to be honest with myself - a very good trauma therapist who I trust and believe in - I learned to feel again and how to handle my feelings and that they're ok - new and different experiences to relearn how things (and maybe even the world works) and form new habits - supportive people who value and accept me (from friends to work etc.) - behavioural therapy might help as well This has been a process for at least 3 years now, the most important part so far was to learn how to feel again. ❤
@@somemonkeystirnerite I am brain damaged can’t feel emotions just like psychopaths and I can do the same stuff and we know right from wrong but I’m not out butchering people and doing evil.
My partner is a high functioning psychopath, at first when he told me about it, I felt sickened. Now it doesn't bother me I learned to live and except who he is.
@Sherlyn and if you've ever felt a strong emotion, or got sad because someone else is? you're an "empath" please find empath in the DSM-5 for me, anyone, anyone?
I have studied this subject a lot being a psychology student. I think the disconnect is so widely all pervasive in the psychopathic mind that just the pupils would not really suffice. Doing a MFRI and looking at the psychopaths brain mind prove more affective. You mentioned the amygdala and there is a definite disconnection between the prefrontal cortex the executive brain and the amygdala. Now, if the amygdala is more in control when the psychopath is being triggered or stimulated this would explain the pupil dilation I think. The nobodies home blank could be that disconnection. I have been wondering lately that if an adolescent say a14 year old was displaying conduct disorder could we stop him from being a killer by doing neurological testing? I hope our society can progress forward in that so many lives could be saved. So, to focus on pupil dilation is interesting indeed but the psychopaths overall physiology and neural imaging might be a way to help every one concerned. Thanks Dr Grande you rock!
There is treatment available from at least as far back as the 90s. It's been shown by researchers to often be caused by oxygen deprivation during birth. No child chooses to have ASPD. They are not willfully harmful. It's a disturbance in the communication between their frontal cortex and the limbic system where the amygdala is in the brain. A documentary made on young children with conduct disorder and adults with ASPD in the 90s shows that ADHD medicine makes their impulses slow down and allows them to focus and apply themselves at school and feel emotions and empathy. Their behaviour completely changes. Also biofeedback therapy in adults showed that they can learn to focus and apply themselves constructively to their lives and not feel the urges to break the laws. It's a fascinating documentary and everyone should watch it and spread the word on it so that some day we can see a world where every child who could potentially develop ASPD gets the right help and that eventuality is avoided. It's titled 'The Dangerous Few' and it's available on TH-cam. It's sad that despite treatment being developed in the 80s and 90s even today many children are not getting it as awareness levels of ASPD and the treatment are so low.
Awesomely interesting comment!! This sort of mind study, I find to be incredibly fascinating to say the least..I've only seen limited clips on similar type research. I'd love to view/read more on this topic.. Any chance you can direct a layman like me, on a good place to start? Many thanks 😊
Great points, but I think as far as treating them goes, we need to under stand why they thrive, its because a large portion of society is not capable of even identifying let alone fixing them, but we need to ultimately create an environment that is not condusive for them. An environment where, to be one, would to be commit social suicide. But we don't want to witch hunt, we need difinitive ways of understanding what to do with them after they are discovered, its a hard question because if everyone was able to combat these psychopaths by identifying them as soon as they show red flags, how would the psycopaths respond? There would be nothing they could do, and they would be like children in a world of emotion that they could never grasp, sad, but maybe they will in another life. I find it very unlikely to ever truly teach a psychopath how to feel, which is essentially the issue, they cant feel, so life isn't real, we can, so life can be unbelievably real at times, realness defined as impact on the meaning of our life.
@@TheXComputerXDr This is exactly why they mimick emotions and wear a mask to hide. Because they are actually just children of 6-7 when they realise they are different and that others think these reactions called emotions are something very important. So they observe, practice and learn to fake them. They live very lonely lives except for the few people if any in their lives who do figure them out and still accept them as they are or whom they can drop their masks around. It's very tiring having a mask on all the time socially so they shy away from unnecessary social interactions as well. I have friends who are this way. They don't choose to be this way, their brains fire differently. And there are treatment protocols for it but not commonly known of as awareness of the condition as well as treatment is extremely low among people.
My mother is a huge narcissist, I cut contact with her a few months ago due to me coming to terms with her previous abuse towards me when I was a kid. She kept me around unsafe people as a child and was very very self centred. Coming to think of it my mother had this particular stare, quite often especially when I was telling her about my emotions. And let me tell you, there was not a single soul behind her eyes. It was just coldness with a mix of disgust and envy. Seeing this as a child is terrifying.
My mother is very narcissistic, which I realized early last year. Although I’ve all but cut contact with her, due to her behavior last year, including her attempts at psychological and emotional abuse towards me, I don’t know whether she’s speedily going down the spectrum towards psychopathy. Plus, her eyes are brown so and I’m not a psychotherapist so, I couldn’t tell anything about pupil dilation when I did see her. But, one thing I did notice, other than all of the other very pointed and conscious behavior she emitted, was when she was at the hospital. Despite the fact that she answered a few light questions correctly that I was giving her, even her birth year, which she’d lied about most of her life, I felt like I literally “smelled” that something wasn’t right and I also noticed that the corners of her mouth were turned down and wondered if it had anything to do with mental status since, that had never been a normal facial expression for her. I know that downturned mouth corners are often associated with drug use but, for where she lives, it’s highly doubtful that’s at issue. I do know that she’d suffered depression and would never consider any help, but to destroy loved ones, with our cooperation. I do feel as if part of her narcissistic behavior emanated from depression and the history behind it though. Where I am concerned, since I am her daughter and have now learned about narcissism, I monitor myself. I monitor any trend towards lack of empathy and other co-morbid issues. As I get older, I do feel less empathy, but I think it may be more of just the hardening of ones self, as you age. When I feel less empathetic, it’s also when I’ve been sleep deprived - which is quite often. I feel that my empathy is someone’s artificial and manufactured. For startle response, I feel as though I may have less startle response than I used to, but it could be because I feel I become more misanthropic as I age and because I have cats. One gets used to being snagged out of nowhere, when they have cats. Still I am an INTJ that, through picking up clues, I try to keep an eyes on things. I don’t doubt that, with having dealt with the recession, all to have my mother try to turn herself out, the moment I got a foothold on a decent job, I probably also have compassion fatigue though.
Met 2 so far, both I caught off guard giving me a look. Exact same , face downwards eyes staring at me looking angry and it really throws you off. Carried on as if nothing had happened but it sticks in my mind. A sociopath I met tries to please everyone, obsessed with attention and will move around the room going to different people all with the same flirtatious act.
I've always noticed it in the laughs. An unexpressive laugh, thats loud and fully pronounces every "HA HA HA HA HA". The eyes I personally can't say I've noticed much, because I've met evil people with big pupils, evil people with small pupils, so I think theres a lot more to factor in with someones pupil size, though there's things someone could definitively point out in a psychopath I suppose. My only other clue I normally get, is how they walk, how they talk and how they behave. Often psychopaths I do know, have a strange gate to their walk, and they say really silly things to keep themselves entertained, like "Foreskin???".
I realize you mention 'medications' as a factor but having a full history of substance use/abuse is very important including last episode of use. Thank you for the admonishment that we cannot 'spot' psychopaths by observing pupil dilation alone. Sadly, I can think of 2 clinicians that would be 'bragging' about this 'new' skill they have of 'spotting; psychopaths during an intake. I always appreciate your posts!
I have an idea about why they are threatened by a happy face. What makes a psychopath happy? Being victorious over others, right? So to them, if someone is smiling, it means that they are feeling victorious over them which would, of course, threaten them.
Well I scan people like that just so I can know if the person is dangerous or not. So. That does not necessarily mean someone is a psychopath, but it could be one of the symptoms for it though.
godstomper I notice that in some people too. A very frantic eye movement while you talk to them. I always wondered why they do that or what it was about. I never see anyone else besides very few people do that or sometimes if a person is assessing you in context during an interview.
Interesting you mention that people high in psychopathy have an increase in puple size when they see pictures of happy faces, perhaps due to mistrust. Most people smile back when you smile at them. So does this mean that when you first meet somebody and they don't react positively to your genuine smile that they might be a psychopath? I've only met two people in my life who sent chills up my spine when I first met them. These people didn't smile back, just gave me a cold blank stare.
There could be hundreds of other reasons not to smile though. Some people with autism might look blank because mirroring emotions can be difficult sometimes, it could someone be on meds that make them fuzzy or affect their facial muscles, they could be dealing with trauma, they could be in some kind of dissociative state, or even just be having a bad day, or they're just not sure they like you yet! I smile reflexively with strangers and it's not inherently because I'm a nice person, it started as a conscious effort to put them at ease because I hate conflict and thought it might brighten some people's day. Not a hard thing for a psychopath to learn, I think. And to be honest, not many strangers smile back if I smile at them. It's not a good judge of character, especially for a personality type famous for "masking". I'm not discrediting you if someone's giving you really bad vibes though, listening to those instincts has saved lives. Just remember most psychopaths are pretty chill people and don't stalk around like angry vampires planning their next kill, they're typically very charming and friendly so most will smile a lot.
@@inkypunk agree with your comment. There's alot more reasons a stranger might not smile back, but I would assume someone's not nice in general if they don't have the courtesy to smile back, it doesn't take much does it haha. And FYI people never smile at me 😂
It depends on the psycopath. Some might not smile because they havent figured you out yet. On the other hand others might smile just because mirroring someones body language leads to more trust
My stepfather was a sort of psychopath (a narcissist, most probably). My mother used to say that his eyes had a weird expression right before he would fly into a rage. Most of the times when he was in public he was nice to people but sometimes he would even snap at strangers - he told us he once yelled at a cashier in a store because she asked if he needed a bag for his items. It took us 20 years to get him out of our lives and our home. The police told my mom she had to file a criminal complaint but she didn't want him to go to prison and only a few years ago she filed a civil lawsuit and managed to win it but he still wouldn't move out. It took another few months and then we were finally free, and even though we're going through an economic crisis and a world health crisis, life is pretty good.
To assess by pupil dilation "in the wild" you'd also need to know what part of the environment people were reacting to. This is easy in a laboratory where everything is boring except for the sound or image that is offered to elicit a possible response.
My ex was batshit crazy. She had this stare and big green eyes. You could tell she was Loco from across the street. Once a girl made an off comment to her and my ex yanked this girl out of her car through the driver's window while at a red light. She beat her senseless and didn't even stop while the cops tried to pull her off. I have 1000 stories like that. The only reason I stayed with her so long is because I'm a nut job as well. Oh the memories.....
I knew someone who was a really nice guy but had been addicted to drugs and in prison as a young man in his late teens. He recovered and has been fine for decades, but he would talk about this. He would always say that most of the people in prison were troubled and sad souls like him - usually addicts that did a bad thing - but that there were some they all learned to avoid. He had an expression, "the eyes have it" and that's what he meant - stay away from that person. He was always right. I learned a lot from his experience and this post adds a dimension to what I learned. So thanks for posting this.
2:40 - For those of us who’ve been around narcs, all the way into the psychopathic range, I would say that in every case I’ve ever experienced in over four decades, these individuals are ALARMED 😱 when seeing friendly faces. They do see friendly people as a threat, since narcs/psychopaths are ALL fake, and they feign kindness/friendliness only when they’re trying to gain something from someone. Since they have no scruples as to how they’ll obtain what they want, this is never a good thing. It’s quite amusing to see them suspicious & guarded around me, an empath, while being comfortable around other narcs. Their projection causes misguided mistrust. We all tend to recognize our own, energetically, so if I’m entering a store when another empath is exiting, we feel some sort of energetic draw, and exchange smiles. I’ve seen the same with narcs seeing their own, and they treat each other well, while disregarding those who aren’t narcs. Went off on a tangent there, but when there’s too much at stake for a psychopath, they elect to err on the side of suspicion. Why bother with trusting someone who might hurt you, right? 🤷♀️
The key to establishing normalcy in children exhibiting psychopathy is NOT in getting them to "understand" empathy towards others, as most already do at an earlier age, but rather in getting them to directly associate other's discomfort and pain with their own empathy. The reason why this notion has failed in therapy is because the children are "instructed", "ordered", or "asked" to do so. Just asking or telling a child or adult that they “should” feel empathy for others will not promote any sense of genuine consideration or respect for the other person (potential victim). However, there has been controversial but concrete success in genuinely training children (and adults) in true empathy, despite the claim that psychotics are devoid of feeling them due to biological causes. In the 1960s and 70’s some experimentation on the emotional behavioral of primates (Chimps and Macaques) was done. Later when done on human children, by pure serendipity and coincidence, they were able to make dissociated, indifferent, and predatory children truly “considerate” of others by introducing a short training regimen that forced a psychological effect to automatically associate the discomfort they see in other children to their own feelings. However, this can only be done by forcing the children or in some cases adults, to actually feel pain and discomfort, while watching the discomfort of others. And in a life-imitates-art sort of way, this is similar to how Alex was experimented on in the film “Clock Work Orange”. Still, although this fictional incident of forced accountability is only vaguely representative of reality, the aspect of “forcing association” is undoubtedly real. Basically, a person can indeed be “programmed” to genuinely feel empathy for others, and this overwhelming feeling can indeed be triggered by the sight of someone in distress. - This only attributed to the forced association of it. This process mimics what nature normally does with humans and animals, which in nature has much to do with reading the faces and body language, as well as calls and sounds of the other being, thus establishing an automatic effect of association regarding the forced sympathy and empathy it triggers. A psychotic child, whether by nature or nurture is cut off from these triggers and becomes distant, indifferent, and willfully or unwillingly devoid of the emotions needed to become an empathetic or sympathetic individual. However, a process can be introduced to “re-install” these triggers. But this cannot be accepted in modern practice, due to the necessity to inflict discomfort and pain onto psychotic children in order to create the “bridge of association” needed to employ and establish these triggers. This necessity has to occur, because it is not effective for a child with psychopathy to simply “understand” logically the aspect of empathy, but instead “FEEL” the pain that triggers it.
Because modern ethics and the over-dependence on pharmaceutical drugs both hinders and restricts the more extreme practices needed to deal with the more extreme conditions, and is often considered unethical and abusive -- it is unlikely that extreme mental disorders, such as psychopathy related cases, will be handled effectively, and is actually more apt to be continually responded to with the deployment of ever-faulty treatments. -- Templar Dark Riddle
Thanks, Dr. Grande, for posting yet another great video! I think that in practical interpersonal situations, especially under stress, we would not notice pupil variations in anyone. Perhaps in a lab setting one could detect such variations, but then there are probably better ways of identifying psychopaths in a lab.
When my father would abuse me his eyes weren't the same, It was terrifying it's like I was making eye contact with the devil himself. Eye contact horrifies me now
I hope it's ok to give a suggestion on the technical side of your videos (which I just started watching by the way and I love them!) Would you consider using something called a De-esser tool when you're editing? What it does is takes out the harshness of "s" sounds that happens when you're talking especially into a mic. I have sensitive ears and sometimes it hurts when I hear that sharp s. I hope this doesn't come across as rude. I love your work!
I think that it may be the eye expression that is inconsistent with the emotion that the person is trying to express. It’s creepy on a subconscious level to most people
Astounding as usual. May I ask if you could do a video on Alex from A Clockwork Orange and perhaps your own personal insight into it? It's very much to me, a novel/movie asking the question; can you force psychopath to change? Would love to know your thoughts on popculture psychopaths in general.
I think that the 2 second increase in pupil dilation correlated with a visual of a smile could indicate that sociopaths work by manipulation.... a smile by a victim indicates an invitation, or a soft target, if you will... puts me in mind of Dalmer with his cast on his arm looking for a friendly face to “help” him....also puts me in mind of my ex... when I asked him why he loved me, his reply was “ because you love me”... 😬-- ladies consider this reply a red flag for the dark triad
Non-educated but highly fascinated by criminal psychology I gotta say that question sounds pretty much like "Can you spot a violent person by their facial expression?" "Can you spot an anti-social person from not maintaining eye contact?" As in there might be some truth to these findings, but it is very, very hard to describe and each person would be their own case with multiple other factors to calculate in.
re 3:00. Dr Robert Hare (UBC) write in his book (paraphrase) that psychopaths ‘can hum the tune, but don’t know the words’ with regard to their affect of deficits and ability to “act normally” (emotional responses).
Psychopaths distrust people who smile because psychopaths gain pleasure from other peoples misfortune and unhappiness. So when they see indications of joy in another person they automatically judge them by their own yardstick and see them as about to screw them over in some way. Psychopaths gain more joy from wealth stolen than from wealth earned, so there’s an inversion going on in their approach to things regarding healthy mind states.
Some people seem to have dead eyes. I'm not talking pupil dilation, more facial expression and very little eye movement or expression around the eyes. The eyes being so still remind you of a shark. Anyone else notice this? Not saying its definately linked to psychopathy, but possibly is, and is creepy as hell! Oh yes, and if this is paired with a smirk or a smile when seeing someone else in trouble, I think this is a reliable sign of antisocial tendancies. I'm thinking there is an element of sadism enjoying others misfortune.
Dr. Grande, you are mentioning around min. 9:40 that there is an association between pupil dilation and psychosis. Could you do a video on this, as well? This would be so kind of you. ❤
There are many other things that effect pupil dilation/size. I know people very aware of their own pupil dilation due to medication and or metal illness and it leads to fear of interacting with others, leading to a whole host of issues. Too many people believe they can read people so easily.
What about the connection between Testosterone (Irritable Male syndrom, the unhappy, the abandoned, the angry, the lonely pasive-aggressive, sweaty, hypersexual) - Bipolar disorder - Depression - problems with the nervous system and treatment with Lithium and Levodopa after effect that create Psychosis, Hypersexuality and Narcissism... as well as instant pupil dilation .. people who have received treatment for different types of emotional behavior, after a period experience Narcissism and emotional confusion or completely lose their connection with themselves, identifying with the outside, fear of looking inside and accepting that they have been transformed into emotional vampires through -a "classic bite".
Dr Grande, could you please discuss JOHN LIST, a family annihilator who killed his family in 1971 and evaded capture until a crime show broadcast his story, using a Bust of what he could look like, which turned out to be absolutely spot on edit (20 years later).
Well-said. I'm a psychopath and appreciate more sympathetic discussions of it. I'm not a monster, I'm just horribly unhappy and can't feel guilt. Also we have the same nose.
Pupil dilation is enough interesting study for determining whether someone may have psychopathy or not, but I think there would be more possible studies about it. Studying psychopathy itself is honestly terrifying for me, but as how we try to understand them not like how they understand themselves creates more advantage for us to know how to handle them rather than them "manipulating" us.
Psychopath stare is that similar to the old evil eye ? I've seen something similar too that in my neighbor her eyes turned completely black they looked demonic . Sent chills down my spine .
I met a young man from Germany about a decade ago, introduced to me by his friends. He was excited to meet a priestess. His intensity made my hair stand on end. A thrilling experience, but I was grateful I never had to meet him again. I was lucky that I had learned about psychopathy and had heard of others' experiences. I might otherwise have been attracted to him. A while back, one of the Korean dramas series featured an actor who did a great job of portraying an essential psychopath. Intense interest like a cat, friendly, with a warm smile--but his eyes told another story.
I have noticed over the years, when a photo of the person is available, their eyes are in the upper part of their eye socket, with more of the white part at the bottom, even though they are looking straight forward.
In the interest of science, investigations of various personality traits must be "dissected" so to speak. However, I was wondering if there is any evidence for "gut feelings" one may experience around a psychopath? It would be quite interesting how such research would be conducted. Thank you very much for your insightful posts.👍
@@mentalcat9529 I second that. Those of us that have a heightened sense of feeling just know. For me it's like dissociation but in a hyper aware state where I see it though my third eye. It's hard to explain. I could so describe it as a foreshadowing scene in a psychothriller where later I'm the character that gets to say I told you so when ish goes down.
His eyes were like black glass. There was no emotion behind them. Just empty. He knew I was afraid. All I wanted to do was get away from him. I felt unsettled and confused when he looked down at me, just inches away from my face. During the 5 year romantic relationship I had with him, I only saw the eyes twice but I will never forget. I later found out (after relationship ended) he had been arrested for impersonating a public officer (really weird) & stalking a past girlfriend. During our relationship he stalked me too, showed signs of violence, sexually assaulted me and had conned friends into investing in his financial scams. Sound like a psychopath?
I know this comment is from a month ago but I just wanted to say I absolutely love the cute little profile picture that you have currently. It's not related to what you've said or to the topic of the video though so my apologies lol. Have a lovely day if possible. X 💜 ٩(｡◕‿◕｡)۶
My husband and I were watching this video by chance when he said ‘I think he’s talking about a study we conducted recently’. Looking at the credits, sure enough you referenced his work. Thank you - well reported and accurately assessed.
How exciting for the Jones’s and thanks, for the teaching.
i like your cat
@@Tiro95 why thank you. Rosie Wee Wee is very flattered 😺
@@TheBeepster10 😁
@@TheBeepster10 why? well i have two, i actually like all cats but i see your profil picture, so yea... spreading some cat love 😹
In my experience, the most dangerous people have learned to perfect the art of faking sincerity.
Yeah. Psychopath or not.
Are the weakest those who don't? I'm kidding, I agree. Very well put. People don't understand values anymore.
@@BillionairesArentYourFriends bruh fr 💯😔
Not entirely. I believe the most dangerous people are the ones who don't even care to fake sincerity. They just enjoy the complete effect of their essence on everyone else.
Indeed, look at Trump, thespian extraordinaire.
Been in jail a few times when I was younger with a drinking problem. You know who to talk to and who to leave alone just by their eyes. Just comes instinctively
True
I went for suspended license. They put me in a cell with the states most wanted and a guy that stabbed his girlfriend.
Turns out one was a friend from a decade earlier, and the other rented from a friend of mine for over a decade.
I was pretty safe.
@@jefferyharper5720 don't know a out that Jeffery, where I'm from, anyone who stabs a women isn't looked upon too kindly. I've done time in one of worst jails in scotland
@@jasonlevy1221 perhaps, but this was county. No trials yet. That would come once sentenced and in a state or federal pen. Not my choice who they put me in a cell with. He rented from a friend of mine.
@@jefferyharper5720 relax bro, didn't mean anythi g by it, just wondering what a guy like that and states most wanted doing in a county jail, isn't that for minor offences? like driving offences, shoplifting etc
What is that blank stare that you see from a crazy person. Like a hollowness before an act of anger or violence. Like no one's home stare. I have seen this in someone. It's very disturbing.
It’s real, I know exactly what you’re talking about. Just because there aren’t a lot of research-backed studies on it, that doesn’t totally invalidate your experience.
kim Brody I have a young family member that has the blank stare, ie, when he’s looking at his fiancé for long periods at a time. He is also on meds that affect pupillary dilation like atropine and Belladonna made Italian women that much more beautiful with full big pupils. Narcotics can construct to pinpoint pupils. My family member was just diagnosed as a Sociopath, so stare on!
I’ve seen it multiple times in my life. Had the hair stand up behind my neck. Sheer fear instilled in me. I use to be a realtor. One occasion happened doing a open house. He asked me where the bedrooms were. Another time was another in home sales position. The guy tried blocking the front door with a chair and blasted the TV and Radio. When I came out of the bathroom I saw what he did. I promised to date him. Gave him a BS line. He let me go. I’m no longer in sales and will never do it. Predators with shark eyes. Yes. It’s real. Once you’ve seen it and you know your in danger. You will never forget.
I’ve seen that “if looks could kill” look from a guy I was passing in an elevator. I wouldn’t call it blank but it was as if his eye’s were “dead”, like such deep concentrated hatred and anger and something even more evil and indescribable (as if he had lost all sense of hope and he didn’t give a crap) that it was if his eyes were deep holes of blackness. It was so unnerving as I’d never seen that before or since in my life and it made the hairs stand up on my body. I also met a psychopath that had a very strange nervous energy and sweat. It had a horrible pheromone scent almost reminded me of male cat spray. And it would waft on and off. It was the strangest thing. It’s not just their stare it can also be there over excited, nervous predatory scent. This is when they are actively casing you but haven’t attacked yet. This has been my anecdotal experience.
It depends on the type of blank stare it is. There are several medicsl reasons for those blank stares and a couple of spiritual ones as well. Not all stares are created equal. The shark eyed empty yet intense look is one like Charles Manson used to get on his face. His was quite type 2 chaotic psychopathic criminal stare. Jeffery Dahmer, also a murderer, had a different stare, one less intense but one like an artist might have in deep contemplation of how they will dismember your body. I suspect they are having quite a mental conversation with self at that point. If its you they are looking at, I suggest you run! With both of those stares its as if something not human is looking through their eyes. I have seen both, and variation of them with the "dupers delight" grin. They might look absent but they are deep in thought about what they should do next. You are lucky enough to happen to be there and survive, you too could have been in his plan for fun that day.
Then there are the dissociative "fuge" stares, and neuro disorders stares too, where the lights are on but no one is home for a few minutes. These types of stares are random, and generally brief. They can be caused by neuro disorders, PTSD, Hypnosis, Medications, and Severe Mental/Physical Trauma like in DID.
A lot of employees at the DMV have that stare if you don't have the proper documents with you.
Loooool
Yup
Haha 😆 you made my day
🤣😂🤣😂
🤣🤣🤣
I am one of the authors of the research that Dr Grande is talking about. I just found this video - thank you for the interest in our research!
were u with sophie jones?
ᅚᅚᅚHEADᅚᅚᅚ yes
My mother sister and I all have larger pupils. None of us are mentally ill, psychopaths, or substance abusers. I'm told often how beautiful my eyes are. I don't think people even notice that my pupils are a little larger than most. They can still see that my eyes are blue. So I don't feel it's fair to imply that all people who have large pupils are defective in some way. lol
Me too. Thank you for the interest in my research.
@@dissidentfairy4264 I wanna see those eyes now
I once worked with a psychopath/serial predator. Everyone loved working with him, except for one female. My friend absolutely hated him and she could not explain why. When the case unfolded I made the connection his victims resembled her. I believe it was his "predator gaze" that made her dislike him. I am the complete opposite of her. He went under my radar because he did not look at me with predator eyes.
So you actually went under his radar. You did not qualify.
Damn i hope your friend found a new job. Fuck psychos
Certain psychopaths have a type. It's well-documented.
Honestly I think people can recognize psychopaths by facial expressions. It's not as simple as pupil dilation, and it's difficult to measure. But if you make eye contact with one, it can set off an uncanny valley response.
My mother's eyes terrified me. I found it difficult to not fall in with people like her unable to recognize dangers another person would. I had no lack of fear until she died in her late 70's. Then peace finally came.
I can read people's force field.
If someone gives me the evil eye, even if I do not actually see it, I can feel it, I usually confront them and let them know that I am well aware of what they are doing.
I can feel them trying to steal my Force....I know it sounds weird but I died when I was young fell thru ice and drowned, and I've always been a a little weird.
@JFLG 764 what? Get out of here bro
Sublimation of projected emotions. It's all over the face, and your intuition picks up on it.
@@AlastorTheNPDemon Eateot, nice
My grandfather has those eyes, he is very smart, he doesn't care about anyone only himself, I remember when I was little and he saw me like that I knew something was wrong and he was about to say something to humiliate me, he would have this eyes, they would look brighter sharper clearer that made me feel insecure and afraid. I can recognize that stare now easily in others.
Is your grandpa named Rick?
Wow
THE HAWK and the turtle
@rusi vogog huh!?
Why do women hate their parents and grandparents so much?
My birth dad has schizophrenia. I've seen pictures of him "before" and "after". It's haunting, his eyes were bright and then only a couple years later, he looks hollow, not with it. The eyes are truly the window to the soul.
Same thing happened to my uncle. Mental illness is no joke and these people need help
So when he lost the light in his eyes, was it after he was on medication?
@@Punicia Psychopathy isn't a mentaI iIIness.
It kinda amuses me that you have merch.
Big Todd needs to eat too! He should sell a Che Guevera-style shirt with his face though!
I like a coffee cup ☕️
I've checked them out... I was hoping for a funny one 😂
Not nasty.. rather funny!
Now that's got me thinking..... cogs turn.... lol
His face... with his side smirk 😊
@The Rockall Times hilarious! 🤔 Don't think too hard now. 😉
My experience is they may not have comforting eye contact- but, rather a cold look combined with a smirk or laugh. I found this very creepy in a sibling.
Yes...smirk on their face as is they know they are lying
Narcissists do the same thing so it's not easy to tell
@@Puniciacause theres quite high comorbidity between all cluster b disorders and traits.
It’s anxiety. Also it’s projection. So many times people think I’m evil and smirking when they look at me from the side of my face. My face naturally looks like this. They keep saying “why are you smirking” this is what actually starts to make me smirk. I can’t control it. If I was in a dark alley with a gang of people looking to hurt me, I might not give them the normal response and it might be worse
The smile. They learn at a young age that is easier to suck people into their little realm of control if at first they appear friendly. I can't stand psychopaths. I find them creepy and manipulative. They make the hair stand up on the back of my neck, and keep me on edge, always aware of where my knife or gun are.
If you've ever had the misfortune of being with a narc, go back & look at the photos you took of them. Look at their eyes..Lights are on but nobody's home in there.
Cops eyes look right through you, I think they've seen too much.
Yup. Those eyes go all black when they rage on you too.
They really like to do the side-stare where they don’t really turn their head to look at you all the way
I had a short relationship with a man who had allot of rage. His eyes changed when he was angry. I found it to be creepy.
I married one! Eyes really scary before he beat me up. So good you got away!
W Booker, you are too precious to be with a narcissist!
Did their eyes go almost completely black?? Like ALL pupil and no iris?
Yes!! In my situation, his eyes were already really big as it is. But when he would go into an episode, his pupils will dilate so huge, it’s like his eyes were black. And he had hazel eyes. He ended up going to jail before we met and I was looking at his mugshot and you can tell there was nothing there in his eyes. No emotions, nothing. Just blank.
@@joanturner-radford6028 - Yes. My ex-husband's eyes were always either blank or glittering. I avoided the glittery eyes. Both were disturbing, however. @OP.
It happened to me once. That is, I recognized a psychopath the minute our eyes locked. It very quickly turned into a scary and dangerous situation that I only got out of by the mercy of a third party, a complete stranger, who stepped in to save me.
Any details?
@@kkech1 Ill save you the trouble.
"He was cold, emotionless, he looked at me the same way a predator looks at a prey. It was very uneasy, it's just something you feel."
Eyes numb and void of emotion, you see he has no need for anyone in his life but you also see he has an interest towards you because hes looking at you.
@@smackdashitoutchu7755 LOL at people here talking about Psychos as if they're some other-worldly beings, or have special powers.
I never have problems with them. I can spot them literally a mile away, and I subtley let them know that im on to them and to not try any funny business
How do u think u are able to spot them? Is it something they do or say or is it just a six sense or intuition
Why would u let them know that u see them why not just act like u don't see them instead of letting them be aware. What do u gain by achkwoleging their presence?
I have a coworker who has crazy eyes. She is a known bully in the company and has the worst personality. Addicted to negativity and problems.
Doesn't mean they're a psychopath. Could just mean she's a negative Nancy. Psychos are unlikely to pick on people unless they have a goal in mind while doing that
Same and it's embarrassing for her age.
"It's all in the eyes, chico."
-Tony Montana
O
CLASSIC
After all, the eyes are the window to the soul.
Yeah, except the window opens out to a brick wall.
And the window us Psychopaths occasionally throw people out of. 😆
That’s completely not connected.
@@paganwolf5951 Edge?
Indeed
I have also heard psychologists say that wrinkles around the eyes will not be as pronounced in the aging process due to decreased stress response. It's an interesting proposition.
Uh oh, I got no wrinkles around my eyes at 40
Is that old enough for wrinkles?
I watched movie about one study about violent children with conduct disorder. All of them had history of abusing animals and showed criminal tendencies plus little or no empathy. Their brain scans detected that their amygdala doesn’t function properly and they suffer from low ability to concentrate. Ironically that manifest itself in hyper activity. Basically they need more stimuli to get excited.
The scientists found strong correlation between attention deficit in early childhood and the criminal behaviour in the adulthood in those individuals.
And here’s the bomb. There are some studies that suggest it’s reversible. That attention deficit is the result of brain damage and the brain can be trained to prevent future criminal “career” as an psychopath.
I guess from that comes and the psychopathic cold stare. They just can’t process the situations very well and their “reptile” part of the brain takes the lead. It’s all about survival but not about social norms and emotion.
Thank you doctor Grande, you were wonderful again.
So do you think ADHD kids are just psychopaths in early stages? I mean without drug treatment will they grow up to be a psychopathic family annihilator?
@@shadywillow3308 even strong correlation doesn't prove causation.. quite interesting though.
This. This makes so much sense
Sounds like my neighbors kids they're very violent towards animals and people they have zero empathy .
Shady Willow I don’t know. It’s hard to predict the future but certainly they are predisposed. There were other symptoms in their behaviour that manifested themselves as an early signs as lying, stealing (without the need to do it), violence against other children, siblings etc. Basically breaking all the social norms at very early age without no regret. Are they going to become psychopathic?! I don’t know but one thing for sure all scientists agree is that they will become adults with violent tendencies. Also they are still arguing is it the result of brain trauma during the delivery or there is genetic component. I believe the truth is somewhere in between.
I believe it’s reversible if cough in time while the brain is still developing. All the brain scans showed that the neurones don’t communicate well and that’s the reasons for the ADHD.
If we can prevent future violent or criminal behaviour of these children, then why not worth trying?! I believe the prevention is the best choice but these methods are still controversial and they will need time to be proven.
In the future it might turn out that the psychopathy is neurological problem. Not just personality that can’t be changed. But here comes the heavy question for the parents. Are they ready to put the stigma on their children for being problematic in order to help them to develop as regular respectful members of the society?! That’s a really harsh decision and needs big amount of self denial and sacrifice.
Its NOT just pupil size. Jessica Chastain's character Lucille Sharpe in Crimson peak captures psychopath eyes perfectly. They also have 'busy eyes'. A Holistic Dr. I worked with 40 yrs ago taught me to spot problematic patients.
What do you mean busy eyes
I think you mean "piercing eyes" ??
I know exactly what you mean!! Seen a video where a psychopath was in a group and people had to guess who it is. The guy was going from super nice and charming to checking everyone’s mimics and gestures to 'prepare' the next lie. My ex had those eyes too, he looked like he was searching for something all the time. And the eyes were so cold… so lonely.
So yea, busy eyes means they are scanning their surroundings to adapt like a chameleon.
Not just pupil dilation, but the "wild eyed" look where the entire iris is visible. Not counting people with Graves' disease of course. I'd think it would indicate a very level of high anxiety or stress in normal people, but others that seem to look that way all the time, especially when conversing with others.
Sorry... crazy eyes are just that woman you brought home from the bar at 1am. Not a psychpath. Just a poor decision.
Yes! People with the "wild eyed" look are not to be trusted! They are liars, thrive on drama, and have a tendency of narcissism and psychopathy.
Iris or pupils?
You dont know nothing hahahahahhah
Another interesting thing crossed my mind. When we see someone we love our pupils dilate.
Normal human response
High levels of Dopamine and Serotonin
An individual with adhd or depression will typically have low levels of dopamine and serotonin. Disorders are collections of symptoms, some may be comorbid, some may be related to hormones or neurotransmitters (disordered function or damage). I wonder if one day, we might have a better grasp on the brain without labels for overlapping problems. Just some of my musings.
Exactly only proves dialation has nothing to do with only threat. It's muscle memory in a way. Your body is prepping potential energy. The pupils dialate from smiling faces just who the fuck doesn't love being happy?
@@redlightclinicdrummer who doesn't love being happy? why the ever-growing horde of so-called "narcissists" of the zombie apocalypse
Serotonin actually decreases when we're in love. That's what leads to the intense infatuation.
@@bluelover929 i have severe deprasion and adhd, for some reason my eyes are always dialated, so much so that i always get tested when im pulled over bc they think im high
Pupil Theory Tester: "Oh, do not mind me- I stare into eyes so as to watch the pupils change..."
Psycho: "...who's psycho now?"
😂
😂
😂
I've been curious for a while about people who are sexually attracted to psychopaths/sociopaths. I can easily imagine, for example, the so-called "psychopathic stare" being misread as an erotically charged stare.
No my opinion is that people specially females, are attracted to psychos or "bad boys" because the idea that a horrible person only likes you and only treats you well out of all the other people, is kinda hot.
@@nnn.nnn2 - Not "especially females" since men tend to be attracted to "bad girls." It just hasn't become a trope like it has for women. Of course it is an undesirable trope. Men actively chase "bad girls" and then call them "crazy." A caveat: they only chase the pretty ones. A woman can be rotten to the core and men will still chase her if she is good looking.
@@nnn.nnn2 thats a poor analysis… although what is often called the female gaze usually has a component of finding people attractive for a certain aesthetic fulfillment they might provide through certain characteristics (like being reckless or a “bad boy”)
Those individuals just wants to be abused or killed.
@@rtphotos4691 why are you creating a problem where there wasn’t one?
When their eyes turn black ...walk away , no matter what , leave the room get out of there. Last thing you want is to gwt into an argument , its like fighting with the exorsist
The exorcist gets rid of demons.
@@JJ-iq8mi well maybe it was his profession since he’s like them in the first place
Thats racist
i have naturally black eyes cuz im asian
Learn to spell and punctuate, girl!
I feel like some people (not everyone) can tell a psychopath by their eyes, but not necessarily due to pupil dilation. There’s something else I’ve seen, that’s difficult to describe.
@@newadam573 more of a void; a deadness, darkness. Idk. It gives me the creeps.
Its swagger baby .... or lack of in the lame types... and micro expressions u subconsciously pick up. I study a bit into it. Got to protect and perfect the craft u know. ; )
If you stare into the abyss long enough the abyss stares back at you
@@Puniciastop muddying the waters to make them look deep
I’ve seen men who get attracted to me and they give me this “look”.... and we both understand the “look” and if I’m attracted I like the “look”. But then there are other men who give me this “look” and it’s not a normal look of attraction, it’s more like two big black circles of death like ⚫️⚫️ Almost as if their whole eyes turn black and I suddenly feel very on guard and ready to run at any point
What a sexual story.
i know exactly what you're talking about
Always follow your gut feeling!👌
It's how a predator looks at prey. Predatory animals watch their prey with this look. It communicates no emotion and makes objects of both parties to each other. I am not unfamiliar with being the focal point of this look.
Just sounds like indifference to me.
Regardless of pupil size, they will often give an object (person) of their interest the “predatory stare”. Often, directly into your eyes if they have a sexual or romantic interest in you.
What Dr. Grande said about how psychopaths typically are on the defensive when they see happy faces? I have a theory on that, formed from when I was living in a sober living house, (I have an apartment now), I did observe hostility on one man's part whenever I started getting my confidence back. Being an obsessive thinker, having puzzled over the reason why, I came up with my own theory, that maybe if his parents were sadistic, he noticed them seeming happy just before they got abusive, because sadists would be anticipating the cruelty they were planning to do (i.e. Sadists get enjoyment from cruelty) and the child would learn to associate happy expressions with hostility.?
Pamela Patterson write
That's interesting and I can believe that true for my own experiences
i was watching a documentary about Crack Cocaine in America and one thing I noticed strikes me like this former drug dealer said if someone was to tell a funny joke you would have to be like Smerk or be like Huh why because it would be a sign of weakness like you couldn't dance in the club cause the Drug Dealers would see you having a good time you gotta be shown to be Emotionless
My friend has sexual sadism he's very very very very cruel but he said psychopathy is about evilness not cruelty, liking being a rich liar not a bad person
Creepyyyy
I thought this would be about the "I want to watch you bleed to death in a bathtub" look. Friends described a coworker this way and, without knowing who it was, I immediately recognized who they were talking about when I saw him. My limbic system AND amygdala told me to stay the hell away from him.
I don't understand what you mean how can you tell?
@@rainmanj9978 it's like that feeling from Training Day with them Gang Members playing Cards and you feel like that Police Officer there and you notice that Alonzo car is gone if you ever chilled with a Psychopath you know the vibes are gonna be off you gonna see red flags how do I know this cause this person buying me beer when I was 17 he was in prison for assault and I blocked him on Facebook immediately when I got home i looked at my brother like that was horrible experience we did thought that our life was in danger I think he was trying to Drug us and Lord knows what he was on we smoked weed with him but he was a Pill head people on drugs are unpredictable
With this new found knowledge I will never look at people the same. Great video doc!
“Look into my eyes and tell me...what it is you see...”
My ex had the most intense stare I’ve seen only on serial killers mugshots. I just thought that he’s a weirdo but surprise, he got diagnosed with aspd two years into relationship and a lot of things made sense
Yeah he’s a psychopath.
Are you still alive?
my friend is a murder he said he's not a psychopath nor other killers are, he has beautiful big brown eyes other people say that too, you should believe me and in him
so you've been with a creepy weirdo for two years?? lol that tells lots about you
Hus consistency shows he cares, genuinely paying attention and answering questions with caution....it's real.
Another factor is brain trauma - my pupils were permanently dilated for several years after such an event, and received a lot of positive interest!
What do you mean you received a lot of positive interest?
Brain trauma is often a factor in psychopaths, so. . .
Nice coat😆
I have brain trauma; can be very easy for me to lose control of my emotions but I have a conscience. I wrestle strongly with this daily.
Im in a constant state of dissociation from so many traumas and living in an environment where healing isn't possible. All alone.
It's essentially a prison that I want to break free from without any clear idea what step 1 is.
If you're a Godly person, pray for me.
@@Colt8722you have your words, at the very least. Keep writing. You’re good at it.
I love it when you crack yourself up or tell us snippets of your life :)
Ok I take it back. Because God2 said to.
@@HumanimalChannel :o 💙
Love from Sweden 🙂❤
😜🤪
You give it all away at the first sentance with your stifled little laugh.
You can see it in his eyes.
@No One no storm as of yet boss..........
Or maybe he's a serious scientist.
When you see people smile you see their lies
Exactly !
My dad is a psycopath. I could be wrong. Some times he had a look in his eyes like a shark. No dept.when that look would come about . something bad came about.
Stay safe. They can be dangerous.
They look into your eyes but see no one in front of them as if they focus on your existance, but do not look through your entire being, not that yes you know what they are seeing, hold on direct gaze face to face? Not quite 'dead behind the eyes' for them, but as if they look directly at you as much like both alive, but as if you are dead to them instead? It's looking at evil, I have two psych(one not certain but too 100% narcissist to just creep into barely psychopathy. But this is the one I'm more likely to win - physically wise I'm clear, although the other could easily physical overpower strength being male, my brother and he is over six foot, prime peak of male in age, I'm a lot younger yet he not be scary. There's my near tiny extreme opposite in five foot (I'm mid two but am weight wise on muscular here certainty here physically not what this look makes me know she could somehow 'get me' at ANY moment, this creepy sense I do believe when you know around the actual living in the knowledge with a true psychopath, you develop the 'sense' which backed up in science enough to say exactly likely to the truth be repeated in the people whom gave true fla response, they have represented equally in population to have a psychopath around them, in knowing them like that of a family living home, even when nothing to ever be claimed to know they may as most likely also is myth in them being all serial sadist blah, no, they are least represented in the numbers of jail members to be knowing they don't all kill, or do and simply not caught lol however it is a stare which it's not fear response or chills, it's knowing both them fully to know fear in fully life or death too, unrelated, it's just a knowing they are not seeing what you see, you know they see nothing of real people like remorse if they kill you you look that would still be exactly that same state as they give me this. She's also failed to try and fail twice already so jokes on her failure there though. But true and as obvious no way proving my word true, it is, but this is what I look at and know I'm looking at something, and it be when up close and finally she looks right at me, from say across a room, fleeting acknowledgement she look normal, then there's these specific repeated and not ever as induced by naturally be positioned somehow to then have only times, but you know this, it's not a reaction, or feeling as just like a knowing of something in this look. And abusive people, met many, not one be clinically psychopathic however... Wired. I think it has weight to be reported as likely must have some knowledge by living with, even as possibly not even "know" them for whom they are, it is as instinctual but need nurture, due to nothing of only populations correlate, however nothing causal, but repeated correctly in strangers for correct, missed first correct test, missed and more at chance only if identify at random. As perfectly the chance of this not be explained nor seen more into this first be a study read about in the actual ability to cite this, but nothing since, meh life is so crazy huh
@@cherylbaker3319 would like to know more
Quit blaming your parents for what is entirely your own fault, coward. Treat your parents with respect and quit labeling them psychopaths, you spoiled brat.
@@SkillUpMobileGaming Prove to all of us that it's the original poster's fault, oh knowledgable one.
Unless you personally know the original poster, his father, and what his life was like behind closed doors, you have no clue, period. You can't prove it's his fault, that's he's a spoiled brat or disrespects his parents simply because you were not there and don't know him.
All you are doing is making ignorant assumptions based on no information.
When I was struggling with my abusive, narcissistic husband, I wondered if my husband was a psychopath. He abused me for years and wanted me dead. I saw on TH-cam a psychiatrist say to look at a sociopath’s driver’s license and see if that person had bright blue shark eyes. He Did and I gasped. He had bright blue shark eyes and a straight smile. Years later, I’m divorced and my ex as caused me so much pain and Distress. I suffer from PTSD from Narcissistic abuse. He is a narcissistic personality disordered man and used me in a 20 year marriage
The narcissist will murder your soul by cheating on you, lying and betraying you
I am done
One of the worst experiences in this lifetime . You can heal, it takes time and lots of self love 💕
Watch peace and harmony channel she helped me to understand &overcome this tragic event in my life . Her knowledge may be some help to you as well .
Yes.... When I open the mailbox everyday and read all the friggin bills...I can literally feel my pupils dilate so large... That all the words numbers and dollar signs get sucked into my brain by the black hole my pupils make.... Very unpleasant stimuli!!!
Hello, I have a question regarding NPD. If a person exhibits all of the traits of a covert narcissist within the family but is very much a co dependent outside with strangers, what does that make them? I know these people, they are common, people pleasing grovelers trying to please every one they meet but vicious and callous behind closed doors with family. It is not as if they are lying either, ie they genuinely care about strangers and want to help them but are cruel to their children. Is it typical for narcissists to be this way or are these people not narcissists at all but co dependents? I am confused. Please address this.
Great question
They are covert narcissists. Their behaviour outside of the home is their 'good person mask' and their virtue signalling behaviour. Don't be fooled but realise they are disordered. Outside of the home also they won't have many close or good friends because they put others down etc and eventually people catch onto them. They don't truly care about anyone but themselves. Don't be too sympathetic. Protect your interests at all times. They want to be served and catered to at all times. They constantly play the victim. Try not to confront them...then you'll see their true face and they will do what they can to slander you and make your life a misery. Keep a distance while knowing what you know. Ideally if there are children they should be taught that there's a problem with their parent and not with themselves. It can be very harmful to the scapegoat child/ children. But there isn't really a way to live happily with them. It will always remain dysfunctional. Eventually most people abandon them or keep limited and low contact.
yeah no they don't genuinely care about people outside the home. They might convince themselves they are caring with their bullshit stories, but they use it all for supply and reinforcement of their "good guy" persona. It's a mask.
They’re trying to acquire narcissistic supply from those they “respect” or consider “socially-valuable.” The family always gets shit on. That’s how most narcs operate because being fake is damn TIRING,even for a narc. The mask has to come off, sometime.
The codependency fits the narc because they actually have a REALLY low self esteem the victim role (as a covert) or the grandiosity are both put as protection above the emptiness inside.
The emptiness is usually caused by a trauma of some sort.
Source: been there.
Change is possible, even though it is hard. Following things worked for me:
- i wanted change
- i started to learn how to be honest with myself
- a very good trauma therapist who I trust and believe in
- I learned to feel again and how to handle my feelings and that they're ok
- new and different experiences to relearn how things (and maybe even the world works) and form new habits
- supportive people who value and accept me (from friends to work etc.)
- behavioural therapy might help as well
This has been a process for at least 3 years now, the most important part so far was to learn how to feel again. ❤
Looking into the eyes of a psychopath to me is like looking into a black hole, a black tunnel. There's no soul in there. Really uncanny.
They are evil. We should skin and salt them then dump the bodies in a shallow grave filled with fluoroantimonic acid. 😃😐
Yes 100% dead eyes
@@frankcastle4715 as a sociopath or someone with aspd I find this funny yet stupid at the same time.
@@frankcastle4715 you're just as bad
@@somemonkeystirnerite I am brain damaged can’t feel emotions just like psychopaths and I can do the same stuff and we know right from wrong but I’m not out butchering people and doing evil.
Everyone always thinking their spouse is a psychopath smh
Lol true. Most of the time they are just jerks.
That's because psychopaths are often more sexually successful.
opethfeldt unless a psychopath is a 1/10 on looks
My partner is a high functioning psychopath, at first when he told me about it, I felt sickened. Now it doesn't bother me I learned to live and except who he is.
@Sherlyn and if you've ever felt a strong emotion, or got sad because someone else is? you're an "empath"
please find empath in the DSM-5 for me, anyone, anyone?
I have studied this subject a lot being a psychology student. I think the disconnect is so widely all pervasive in the psychopathic mind that just the pupils would not really suffice. Doing a MFRI and looking at the psychopaths brain mind prove more affective. You mentioned the amygdala and there is a definite disconnection between the prefrontal cortex the executive brain and the amygdala. Now, if the amygdala is more in control when the psychopath is being triggered or stimulated this would explain the pupil dilation I think. The nobodies home blank could be that disconnection. I have been wondering lately that if an adolescent say a14 year old was displaying conduct disorder could we stop him from being a killer by doing neurological testing? I hope our society can progress forward in that so many lives could be saved. So, to focus on pupil dilation is interesting indeed but the psychopaths overall physiology and neural imaging might be a way to help every one concerned. Thanks Dr Grande you rock!
Food for thought. Good coment
There is treatment available from at least as far back as the 90s. It's been shown by researchers to often be caused by oxygen deprivation during birth. No child chooses to have ASPD. They are not willfully harmful. It's a disturbance in the communication between their frontal cortex and the limbic system where the amygdala is in the brain. A documentary made on young children with conduct disorder and adults with ASPD in the 90s shows that ADHD medicine makes their impulses slow down and allows them to focus and apply themselves at school and feel emotions and empathy. Their behaviour completely changes. Also biofeedback therapy in adults showed that they can learn to focus and apply themselves constructively to their lives and not feel the urges to break the laws. It's a fascinating documentary and everyone should watch it and spread the word on it so that some day we can see a world where every child who could potentially develop ASPD gets the right help and that eventuality is avoided. It's titled 'The Dangerous Few' and it's available on TH-cam. It's sad that despite treatment being developed in the 80s and 90s even today many children are not getting it as awareness levels of ASPD and the treatment are so low.
Awesomely interesting comment!! This sort of mind study, I find to be incredibly fascinating to say the least..I've only seen limited clips on similar type research. I'd love to view/read more on this topic.. Any chance you can direct a layman like me, on a good place to start? Many thanks 😊
Great points, but I think as far as treating them goes, we need to under stand why they thrive, its because a large portion of society is not capable of even identifying let alone fixing them, but we need to ultimately create an environment that is not condusive for them. An environment where, to be one, would to be commit social suicide. But we don't want to witch hunt, we need difinitive ways of understanding what to do with them after they are discovered, its a hard question because if everyone was able to combat these psychopaths by identifying them as soon as they show red flags, how would the psycopaths respond? There would be nothing they could do, and they would be like children in a world of emotion that they could never grasp, sad, but maybe they will in another life. I find it very unlikely to ever truly teach a psychopath how to feel, which is essentially the issue, they cant feel, so life isn't real, we can, so life can be unbelievably real at times, realness defined as impact on the meaning of our life.
@@TheXComputerXDr This is exactly why they mimick emotions and wear a mask to hide. Because they are actually just children of 6-7 when they realise they are different and that others think these reactions called emotions are something very important. So they observe, practice and learn to fake them. They live very lonely lives except for the few people if any in their lives who do figure them out and still accept them as they are or whom they can drop their masks around. It's very tiring having a mask on all the time socially so they shy away from unnecessary social interactions as well. I have friends who are this way. They don't choose to be this way, their brains fire differently. And there are treatment protocols for it but not commonly known of as awareness of the condition as well as treatment is extremely low among people.
My mother is a huge narcissist, I cut contact with her a few months ago due to me coming to terms with her previous abuse towards me when I was a kid. She kept me around unsafe people as a child and was very very self centred. Coming to think of it my mother had this particular stare, quite often especially when I was telling her about my emotions. And let me tell you, there was not a single soul behind her eyes. It was just coldness with a mix of disgust and envy. Seeing this as a child is terrifying.
My mother is very narcissistic, which I realized early last year. Although I’ve all but cut contact with her, due to her behavior last year, including her attempts at psychological and emotional abuse towards me, I don’t know whether she’s speedily going down the spectrum towards psychopathy. Plus, her eyes are brown so and I’m not a psychotherapist so, I couldn’t tell anything about pupil dilation when I did see her.
But, one thing I did notice, other than all of the other very pointed and conscious behavior she emitted, was when she was at the hospital. Despite the fact that she answered a few light questions correctly that I was giving her, even her birth year, which she’d lied about most of her life, I felt like I literally “smelled” that something wasn’t right and I also noticed that the corners of her mouth were turned down and wondered if it had anything to do with mental status since, that had never been a normal facial expression for her. I know that downturned mouth corners are often associated with drug use but, for where she lives, it’s highly doubtful that’s at issue. I do know that she’d suffered depression and would never consider any help, but to destroy loved ones, with our cooperation. I do feel as if part of her narcissistic behavior emanated from depression and the history behind it though.
Where I am concerned, since I am her daughter and have now learned about narcissism, I monitor myself. I monitor any trend towards lack of empathy and other co-morbid issues. As I get older, I do feel less empathy, but I think it may be more of just the hardening of ones self, as you age. When I feel less empathetic, it’s also when I’ve been sleep deprived - which is quite often. I feel that my empathy is someone’s artificial and manufactured. For startle response, I feel as though I may have less startle response than I used to, but it could be because I feel I become more misanthropic as I age and because I have cats. One gets used to being snagged out of nowhere, when they have cats. Still I am an INTJ that, through picking up clues, I try to keep an eyes on things. I don’t doubt that, with having dealt with the recession, all to have my mother try to turn herself out, the moment I got a foothold on a decent job, I probably also have compassion fatigue though.
Met 2 so far, both I caught off guard giving me a look. Exact same , face downwards eyes staring at me looking angry and it really throws you off. Carried on as if nothing had happened but it sticks in my mind. A sociopath I met tries to please everyone, obsessed with attention and will move around the room going to different people all with the same flirtatious act.
I've always noticed it in the laughs. An unexpressive laugh, thats loud and fully pronounces every "HA HA HA HA HA". The eyes I personally can't say I've noticed much, because I've met evil people with big pupils, evil people with small pupils, so I think theres a lot more to factor in with someones pupil size, though there's things someone could definitively point out in a psychopath I suppose. My only other clue I normally get, is how they walk, how they talk and how they behave. Often psychopaths I do know, have a strange gate to their walk, and they say really silly things to keep themselves entertained, like "Foreskin???".
@jimmy hehehe-ha!
I realize you mention 'medications' as a factor but having a full history of substance use/abuse is very important including last episode of use. Thank you for the admonishment that we cannot 'spot' psychopaths by observing pupil dilation alone. Sadly, I can think of 2 clinicians that would be 'bragging' about this 'new' skill they have of 'spotting; psychopaths during an intake. I always appreciate your posts!
So I just binged watched this channel and I am hooked.
The eyes are the windows to the soul! We’ve all seen the dark empty evil eyes!
I heard a long time ago that variable pupil dilation was an indicator of psychopathy. (fluctuating).
I’m really learning a lot with your videos. You have a very clear and logical way of explaining things. Thank you!
Ana Fernandez,hope you are not with a narcissist!
I have an idea about why they are threatened by a happy face. What makes a psychopath happy? Being victorious over others, right? So to them, if someone is smiling, it means that they are feeling victorious over them which would, of course, threaten them.
Yes. They also do that rapid eyeball scan . If youve seen it then you know what I mean.
You mean like moving the eyeball without moving the head?
@@fordgt402 yes. Their eyeballs (both) move side to side of their eye sockets while staring at you , as if analyzing you
@@godstomperAs if they have two lazy eyes like a reptile?
Well I scan people like that just so I can know if the person is dangerous or not. So. That does not necessarily mean someone is a psychopath, but it could be one of the symptoms for it though.
godstomper I notice that in some people too. A very frantic eye movement while you talk to them. I always wondered why they do that or what it was about. I never see anyone else besides very few people do that or sometimes if a person is assessing you in context during an interview.
Interesting you mention that people high in psychopathy have an increase in puple size when they see pictures of happy faces, perhaps due to mistrust. Most people smile back when you smile at them. So does this mean that when you first meet somebody and they don't react positively to your genuine smile that they might be a psychopath? I've only met two people in my life who sent chills up my spine when I first met them. These people didn't smile back, just gave me a cold blank stare.
There could be hundreds of other reasons not to smile though. Some people with autism might look blank because mirroring emotions can be difficult sometimes, it could someone be on meds that make them fuzzy or affect their facial muscles, they could be dealing with trauma, they could be in some kind of dissociative state, or even just be having a bad day, or they're just not sure they like you yet! I smile reflexively with strangers and it's not inherently because I'm a nice person, it started as a conscious effort to put them at ease because I hate conflict and thought it might brighten some people's day. Not a hard thing for a psychopath to learn, I think. And to be honest, not many strangers smile back if I smile at them. It's not a good judge of character, especially for a personality type famous for "masking".
I'm not discrediting you if someone's giving you really bad vibes though, listening to those instincts has saved lives. Just remember most psychopaths are pretty chill people and don't stalk around like angry vampires planning their next kill, they're typically very charming and friendly so most will smile a lot.
@@inkypunk agree with your comment. There's alot more reasons a stranger might not smile back, but I would assume someone's not nice in general if they don't have the courtesy to smile back, it doesn't take much does it haha. And FYI people never smile at me 😂
Maybe they were Russian. I read something about how they think it's odd to smile at a stranger.
I don't really smile at all, or even smile back. Mostly because I'm not really happy with my life.
It depends on the psycopath. Some might not smile because they havent figured you out yet. On the other hand others might smile just because mirroring someones body language leads to more trust
My stepfather was a sort of psychopath (a narcissist, most probably). My mother used to say that his eyes had a weird expression right before he would fly into a rage. Most of the times when he was in public he was nice to people but sometimes he would even snap at strangers - he told us he once yelled at a cashier in a store because she asked if he needed a bag for his items. It took us 20 years to get him out of our lives and our home. The police told my mom she had to file a criminal complaint but she didn't want him to go to prison and only a few years ago she filed a civil lawsuit and managed to win it but he still wouldn't move out. It took another few months and then we were finally free, and even though we're going through an economic crisis and a world health crisis, life is pretty good.
I get that stare when someone eats my last piece of chocolate. 👀
Keep...a never-ending supply on hand
The dark nothingness behind a persons eyes is a telling sign that they could be a psychopath.
You literally just watch a video proving that wrong…
@@MadaraUchiha-jd9nx Wrong
There is literally a comment section here of hundreds of people with the same impression who say it's not about pupil dilation.
To assess by pupil dilation "in the wild" you'd also need to know what part of the environment people were reacting to. This is easy in a laboratory where everything is boring except for the sound or image that is offered to elicit a possible response.
My ex was batshit crazy. She had this stare and big green eyes. You could tell she was Loco from across the street. Once a girl made an off comment to her and my ex yanked this girl out of her car through the driver's window while at a red light. She beat her senseless and didn't even stop while the cops tried to pull her off. I have 1000 stories like that. The only reason I stayed with her so long is because I'm a nut job as well. Oh the memories.....
I knew someone who was a really nice guy but had been addicted to drugs and in prison as a young man in his late teens. He recovered and has been fine for decades, but he would talk about this. He would always say that most of the people in prison were troubled and sad souls like him - usually addicts that did a bad thing - but that there were some they all learned to avoid. He had an expression, "the eyes have it" and that's what he meant - stay away from that person. He was always right. I learned a lot from his experience and this post adds a dimension to what I learned. So thanks for posting this.
2:40 - For those of us who’ve been around narcs, all the way into the psychopathic range, I would say that in every case I’ve ever experienced in over four decades, these individuals are ALARMED 😱 when seeing friendly faces.
They do see friendly people as a threat, since narcs/psychopaths are ALL fake, and they feign kindness/friendliness only when they’re trying to gain something from someone. Since they have no scruples as to how they’ll obtain what they want, this is never a good thing.
It’s quite amusing to see them suspicious & guarded around me, an empath, while being comfortable around other narcs. Their projection causes misguided mistrust. We all tend to recognize our own, energetically, so if I’m entering a store when another empath is exiting, we feel some sort of energetic draw, and exchange smiles. I’ve seen the same with narcs seeing their own, and they treat each other well, while disregarding those who aren’t narcs.
Went off on a tangent there, but when there’s too much at stake for a psychopath, they elect to err on the side of suspicion. Why bother with trusting someone who might hurt you, right? 🤷♀️
Having high empathy doesn't make you an "empath". That's not a thing.
The key to establishing normalcy in children exhibiting psychopathy is NOT in getting them to "understand" empathy towards others, as most already do at an earlier age, but rather in getting them to directly associate other's discomfort and pain with their own empathy.
The reason why this notion has failed in therapy is because the children are "instructed", "ordered", or "asked" to do so.
Just asking or telling a child or adult that they “should” feel empathy for others will not promote any sense of genuine consideration or respect for the other person (potential victim).
However, there has been controversial but concrete success in genuinely training children (and adults) in true empathy, despite the claim that psychotics are devoid of feeling them due to biological causes.
In the 1960s and 70’s some experimentation on the emotional behavioral of primates (Chimps and Macaques) was done. Later when done on human children, by pure serendipity and coincidence, they were able to make dissociated, indifferent, and predatory children truly “considerate” of others by introducing a short training regimen that forced a psychological effect to automatically associate the discomfort they see in other children to their own feelings.
However, this can only be done by forcing the children or in some cases adults, to actually feel pain and discomfort, while watching the discomfort of others.
And in a life-imitates-art sort of way, this is similar to how Alex was experimented on in the film “Clock Work Orange”.
Still, although this fictional incident of forced accountability is only vaguely representative of reality, the aspect of “forcing association” is undoubtedly real.
Basically, a person can indeed be “programmed” to genuinely feel empathy for others, and this overwhelming feeling can indeed be triggered by the sight of someone in distress. - This only attributed to the forced association of it.
This process mimics what nature normally does with humans and animals, which in nature has much to do with reading the faces and body language, as well as calls and sounds of the other being, thus establishing an automatic effect of association regarding the forced sympathy and empathy it triggers.
A psychotic child, whether by nature or nurture is cut off from these triggers and becomes distant, indifferent, and willfully or unwillingly devoid of the emotions needed to become an empathetic or sympathetic individual.
However, a process can be introduced to “re-install” these triggers.
But this cannot be accepted in modern practice, due to the necessity to inflict discomfort and pain onto psychotic children in order to create the “bridge of association” needed to employ and establish these triggers.
This necessity has to occur, because it is not effective for a child with psychopathy to simply “understand” logically the aspect of empathy, but instead “FEEL” the pain that triggers it.
Because modern ethics and the over-dependence on pharmaceutical drugs both hinders and restricts the more extreme practices needed to deal with the more extreme conditions, and is often considered unethical and abusive -- it is unlikely that extreme mental disorders, such as psychopathy related cases, will be handled effectively, and is actually more apt to be continually responded to with the deployment of ever-faulty treatments.
-- Templar Dark Riddle
I was thinking about that song " Doctor my eyes " by Jackson Brown (1972) during this video.....lol 😁
Interesting topic Dr. Grande. Thanks 😃🇳🇱
Thanks, Dr. Grande, for posting yet another great video! I think that in practical interpersonal situations, especially under stress, we would not notice pupil variations in anyone. Perhaps in a lab setting one could detect such variations, but then there are probably better ways of identifying psychopaths in a lab.
When my father would abuse me his eyes weren't the same, It was terrifying it's like I was making eye contact with the devil himself. Eye contact horrifies me now
Im so sorry you had to live trough something like that😔❤️🩹💝
When I was a kid I used to sit in the mirror and force my pupil to go large.. fun times
I hope it's ok to give a suggestion on the technical side of your videos (which I just started watching by the way and I love them!) Would you consider using something called a De-esser tool when you're editing? What it does is takes out the harshness of "s" sounds that happens when you're talking especially into a mic. I have sensitive ears and sometimes it hurts when I hear that sharp s. I hope this doesn't come across as rude. I love your work!
I want to personally thank you Doc, these videos helped me greatly
I think that it may be the eye expression that is inconsistent with the emotion that the person is trying to express. It’s creepy on a subconscious level to most people
Astounding as usual. May I ask if you could do a video on Alex from A Clockwork Orange and perhaps your own personal insight into it? It's very much to me, a novel/movie asking the question; can you force psychopath to change? Would love to know your thoughts on popculture psychopaths in general.
CRABSTYX THIS PLEASE
I think that the 2 second increase in pupil dilation correlated with a visual of a smile could indicate that sociopaths work by manipulation.... a smile by a victim indicates an invitation, or a soft target, if you will... puts me in mind of Dalmer with his cast on his arm looking for a friendly face to “help” him....also puts me in mind of my ex... when I asked him why he loved me, his reply was “ because you love me”... 😬-- ladies consider this reply a red flag for the dark triad
That's Ted..
Johnny Appleseed headass
Non-educated but highly fascinated by criminal psychology I gotta say that question sounds pretty much like "Can you spot a violent person by their facial expression?" "Can you spot an anti-social person from not maintaining eye contact?" As in there might be some truth to these findings, but it is very, very hard to describe and each person would be their own case with multiple other factors to calculate in.
Fascinating!!! One of my fav videos!! Thank you
re 3:00. Dr Robert Hare (UBC) write in his book (paraphrase) that psychopaths ‘can hum the tune, but don’t know the words’ with regard to their affect of deficits and ability to “act normally” (emotional responses).
Psychopaths distrust people who smile because psychopaths gain pleasure from other peoples misfortune and unhappiness. So when they see indications of joy in another person they automatically judge them by their own yardstick and see them as about to screw them over in some way. Psychopaths gain more joy from wealth stolen than from wealth earned, so there’s an inversion going on in their approach to things regarding healthy mind states.
Very insightful.
Some people seem to have dead eyes. I'm not talking pupil dilation, more facial expression and very little eye movement or expression around the eyes. The eyes being so still remind you of a shark. Anyone else notice this?
Not saying its definately linked to psychopathy, but possibly is, and is creepy as hell! Oh yes, and if this is paired with a smirk or a smile when seeing someone else in trouble, I think this is a reliable sign of antisocial tendancies. I'm thinking there is an element of sadism enjoying others misfortune.
The dark eyes of a narc. Once seen, never forgotten. Chilling.
Lmao wtf is this
Bruh 😮
Very true, you can never forget the evil in the dark angry eyes of the narc.
Dr. Grande, you are mentioning around min. 9:40 that there is an association between pupil dilation and psychosis. Could you do a video on this, as well? This would be so kind of you. ❤
Really interesting subject, learning something new everyday from you. Keep up the great work
What I notice is an arrogant contempt, a smirk, conveyed through their eyes.
There are many other things that effect pupil dilation/size. I know people very aware of their own pupil dilation due to medication and or metal illness and it leads to fear of interacting with others, leading to a whole host of issues. Too many people believe they can read people so easily.
What about the connection between Testosterone (Irritable Male syndrom, the unhappy, the abandoned, the angry, the lonely pasive-aggressive, sweaty, hypersexual) - Bipolar disorder - Depression - problems with the nervous system and treatment with Lithium and Levodopa after effect that create Psychosis, Hypersexuality and Narcissism... as well as instant pupil dilation ..
people who have received treatment for different types of emotional behavior, after a period experience Narcissism and emotional confusion or completely lose their connection with themselves, identifying with the outside, fear of looking inside and accepting that they have been transformed into emotional vampires through -a "classic bite".
Dr Grande, could you please discuss JOHN LIST, a family annihilator who killed his family in 1971 and evaded capture until a crime show broadcast his story, using a Bust of what he could look like, which turned out to be absolutely spot on edit (20 years later).
Humanimal That case was crazy. They even got his glasses correct 20 years later!
@@TipTheScales27 totally amazing eh!
Omg I saw that on tv like a week ago. The guy that did the bust is amazing!
Well-said. I'm a psychopath and appreciate more sympathetic discussions of it. I'm not a monster, I'm just horribly unhappy and can't feel guilt. Also we have the same nose.
Very interesting (again!)...pupil dilation topic reminds me of mid 70's when it was all about Who Do You Love...
That was my first thought, too. 😊
Wishful Thinking,hope you are not with a narcissist!
I’ve learned so much from this guy and the way he explains topics in such a way people can grasp it with ease.
Absolutely fascinating Dr Grande!! I look forward to hearing more on this topic as studies progress. Thank you for fueling our minds! 😊
Pupil dilation is enough interesting study for determining whether someone may have psychopathy or not, but I think there would be more possible studies about it. Studying psychopathy itself is honestly terrifying for me, but as how we try to understand them not like how they understand themselves creates more advantage for us to know how to handle them rather than them "manipulating" us.
Psychopath stare is that similar to the old evil eye ? I've seen something similar too that in my neighbor her eyes turned completely black they looked demonic . Sent chills down my spine .
Her eyes? Like the entire eyeball?
@@max__pain Yes
Mike You probably ate some bad shrooms my guy
@@milk9613 Not at all plus I don't do drugs.
Mike ok
I met a young man from Germany about a decade ago, introduced to me by his friends. He was excited to meet a priestess. His intensity made my hair stand on end. A thrilling experience, but I was grateful I never had to meet him again. I was lucky that I had learned about psychopathy and had heard of others' experiences. I might otherwise have been attracted to him.
A while back, one of the Korean dramas series featured an actor who did a great job of portraying an essential psychopath. Intense interest like a cat, friendly, with a warm smile--but his eyes told another story.
Dr. Grande, you rock! Love your uploads
Danielle M, you look stunning
@@lioydwilliams1850 *blush* thank you!
@@lioydwilliams1850 hi simp
I have noticed over the years, when a photo of the person is available, their eyes are in the upper part of their eye socket, with more of the white part at the bottom, even though they are looking straight forward.
My Son used to do this; he scared me.......
@@margretsims1322 I notice this in some Middle Eastern people as well.
In the interest of science, investigations of various personality traits must be "dissected" so to speak. However, I was wondering if there is any evidence for "gut feelings" one may experience around a psychopath? It would be quite interesting how such research would be conducted. Thank you very much for your insightful posts.👍
I experienced a huge fear with no reason at all. I felt something was off
@@mentalcat9529 I second that. Those of us that have a heightened sense of feeling just know. For me it's like dissociation but in a hyper aware state where I see it though my third eye. It's hard to explain. I could so describe it as a foreshadowing scene in a psychothriller where later I'm the character that gets to say I told you so when ish goes down.
It is your brain that is seeing things that you don't notice consciously.
His eyes were like black glass. There was no emotion behind them. Just empty. He knew I was afraid. All I wanted to do was get away from him. I felt unsettled and confused when he looked down at me, just inches away from my face. During the 5 year romantic relationship I had with him, I only saw the eyes twice but I will never forget. I later found out (after relationship ended) he had been arrested for impersonating a public officer (really weird) & stalking a past girlfriend. During our relationship he stalked me too, showed signs of violence, sexually assaulted me and had conned friends into investing in his financial scams. Sound like a psychopath?
Absolutely fascinating. Thank you for posting this information, I had never considered pupil dilation but it makes perfect sense.
I know this comment is from a month ago but I just wanted to say I absolutely love the cute little profile picture that you have currently. It's not related to what you've said or to the topic of the video though so my apologies lol. Have a lovely day if possible. X 💜 ٩(｡◕‿◕｡)۶
@@joshualeahy2162 well this is a year late but thank you! haha
Great video Dr. Grande! You have the best videos 💜💜