"How is it even possible to live in an office and be late for work?" Because you have to wake up early, tidy up your living space, then get out of the building so you can pretend to arrive at the office around the same time as everybody else. If something goes wrong, you may end up "trapped" in the building.
Okay, the kobold in the box thing almost made me piss myself laughing. I haven't slept and I'm completely punchy, and laughing in that insane way that makes my wife think that my mind has finally snapped. Kudos on making me giggle so hard that it scared my poor wife awake, lol.
my dad was in a campaign once where the DM gave his party two rings and when you put your hand through one, it would appear out the other. The DM though they wouldn't find a use for it. What did they do? They tied one to the tank and the cleric held the other so that the cleric could hit the tank with the touch heal spells without actually being near the tank.
When Rslash cusses YT DEMONETIZED When someone breaks into another persons home YT that’s some quality content put them on trending and give them a bunch of money
he whines about it yet does it knowing full well that it’s getting hit. he had been at it for 18 months by then, it’s him doing it to himself due to his laziness than TH-cam being petty
"This guy named Daniel I used to work with at McDonald's..." Me, who used to work at McDonald's: Wait, what? "...in High School..." Me, who worked there when I was in High School: Oh, no 😟 "He let everyone know he worked out and enjoyed being on the football team." Me, a lardass: Oh, thank God 😁
I like the idea she just stopped for a moment, rolled her eyes and then carried on with whatever she was doing having lived with him for long enough not to be surprised anymore 😂
I make similar content to rslash, my dream is to hit 1000 subs on youtube I'm 1/10 of the way, can you guys help me reach my goal? Regardless, stay safe and take care!!!!!
I was in a D&D session where the DM created a bow called 'The Bow of Immolation' where each shot would set the target on fire but have a 1/10 chance to set the wielder on fire instead. The guy who had it used it twice, the 2nd time, he burned to death.
Reminds me of when I "invented" molotov cocktail arrows in a campaign, they actually were very effective, did normal arrow damage, plus burning damage (if the roll was successful) and had a small area affect lighting stuff around on fire too. Problem was, we also had a magic crystal that the DM warned us would explode if it caught fire... we were losing a battle pretty badly and I told the guy carrying it to chuck it at the enemy and then I would cause it to explode with my special arrows. Both the rolls were successful, I killed all the enemies... and all of us, turns out when the DM said explode what he ment was detonate like a mother effing nuke. Lol
I was in a campaign once where someone tried to overpower themselves with a magical gauntlet they said they had and the DM wasn't going to have that so what the DM did was make it to where the gauntlet would talk to the player so every like 15 minutes the player would have to do a sanity roll because the gauntlet. We would start a battle and the DM would look at the player and just say "do a sanity roll"
This remided me of our game. Husband's character was a warforge and our key interrogation/torture tactic was to have him sit with the person and just talk... for days, while the rest of the group just went along on their business. It was hillarious
Played a similar campaign... played a human necromancer penned by the master (he liked to write stories for the characters as well, and we players acted them out) and she had a... quirky spear.. It used to belong to an evil lich so under its influence my character was Chaotic Evil at the best of times. Once, the party was ambushed by trolls, huge 5meters tall monsters that were clubbing at us and we desperately trying to dodge/parry for our lives - typical setting really... after the battle, the poor healer didn't have enough STamina to heal everyone, so the necromancer got bullied into helping out (one of the requisites for necromancy is the basic heal skill) but the necromancer, who can only be coaxed and not coerced got so mad I had to roll a will power/sanity roll and lost miserably... the outcome? I rolled for helping out the party or act out. Since as a player what I wanted was to help my party, one can guess what happened - The necromancer helpfully helped to heal... the trolls. Only my hand had been cursed by luck and I rolled another pit. Turns out the evil lich in the spear chose to act up and my critical miss turned into a blessing for evil's shenanigans. The trolls were fully revived as mofo zombies trolls with 3x as much stamina and hp, strenght and a thirst for blood. Whole party wiped out except for the necromancer, who was possessed and laughing maniacaly as everyone died... to save the campaign, the master declared everything was actually a dream induced by magic mushrooms spores our hunter failed to detect... I spitefully had my necromancer revive the next troll we met and kept the rotting, huge zombie following me around and grossing everyone we met - good times. The master never handed me a necromancer role ever again.
One of our players ended up with a powerful mace... that was haunted by the spirit of his dead apprentice, a little boy, who he had stupidly dragged along on our adventures and gotten him killed. The boy's spirit turned evil- from the master-didn't-protect-me or the betrayal of not being allowed to rest in peace, never found out. It thoroughly wanted to kill the entire party, and the player refused to get rid of it. It took a while, but we all eventually had to make new characters, and the spirit escaped to cause havoc on the world.
Not the most useless item I have given them but I gave one of my players a staff of cats that, one of its abilities polymorphed someone into a cat for 1 minute (at the cost of all its charges for that day), to make a long story short they polymorphed and NPC(18 Levels in Druid) and stuffed them in a bag of holding... EDIT: Now thinking about it, it is the most useless item I gave them, they bought/stole the rest...
That kobold story reminds me of a time when my party, while travelling through a dungeon, found a fountain full of Potion of Dragon's Breath. We didn't know what it was. So we took the Goblin captive we were using as a guide and threw him in. Not "made him drink it," but actually hurled this goblin into the fountain. Thing came up breathing fire and we decapitated it. Contaminated the fountain, making it useless.
I remember once as a DM I gave the players a : "Rat of Opening" in a special bag. The rat was an item that would three times a day be able to open a simple lock by taking it out of the bag and whirling it above your head and then smacking it against the lock. Sadly it also had a powerful flaw as well, THE SMELL, as the item was a dead rat about a week expired but necromantically held in stasis. The second you removed it from the special bag it would fill a room with the "Funk of Ages" a potent skunk-like cloying smell and monsters LOVED IT so any nearby with a decent "nose" were drawn to it. The players were all serious role-players and drama students so we all had to RP the scenes when the rat was used. Merit/Flaw magic items were very common for our group to seed into the campaigns, this one was my favorite and I would love to hear about other similar items/stories. Is there a subreddit like /EntitledPeople or R/JustnoHOA for AD&D stories? Thanks and Keep up the great content rSlash :)
One time during dnd my group was trying to kill an archer while I was trying to capture him. Earlier in the game we captured a goblin and I had him basically stuffed in my item pouch. While trying to catch the archer I ran out of ideas and just pegged the goblin at the guy. It did not work.
LOL! That sounds like something my teammate might do! He is an half orc named AL Gore and he is an environmentalist so as long as the environment is safe he will do anything!
The create water post reminded me of when my husband and I played DnD with a group of friends years ago. He was a warforge cleric and used the create water spell for murder. Touch someone and create water in the hollow areas of the body i.e. the lungs. It was highly effective, but it meant that he constantly needed to do good things to keep himself on the 'good' spectrum for his spells to work. We were a special bunch. I was a blacksmith barbarian (for the strength bonus) because we had 2 warforges, had a wizard that was a pyromaniac, a clumsy rogue and a ranger who usually got lost. The DM both hated and loved us
@@benjiro8793 To be fair, some campaigns need to be tested out like that. You cant have a DM save everyone all the time. If you can kill a quest NPC, then the quest isnt essential and you can either loot the reward off the NPC or encounter the loot naturally on accident. If the DM keeps saving your ass and allows situations like that to happen with little to no consequences, then ofcourse you might aswell do dumb shit all the time. A DM needs to be firm in consequences, otherwise why not fuck around? I mean, lets take an RPG like Morrowind for example, you can literally kill off some NPC's that are essential to finishing the story line, and you can also just walk to the final objective of the main story line at the start of the game and finish the game in minutes. Your actions have consequences, but taking a risk can reward you massively. While those guys were genuinely fucking about, you should be more strict in consequences, even if they are friends. You cant have someone kill an NPC that is the only person who knows the password to a door and accidentally have that door opened because its needed to progress. They should roll 2 20 faced dice, rolling a set double number(probably double 20) to guess the word correctly, and perhaps even a double 1 to open up a deadly trap that could kill them. That can literally force them to roll 30 minutes long, possibly killing themselves and since that is boring as hell with an actual risk involved, they probably would take the rest of the objectives more serious. If their actions dont have real consequences and they even get rewarded otherwise, meaning they never truly get punished, what would be a reason to take it seriously?
@@benjiro8793 I had similar happen, only it was three experienced DMs (all DMing for more than five years) and the campaign we'd been playing was my first game. THEY insisted I give DMing a try, and spent more than a week talking me into it. Then they messed around with the little scenario I put together and stressed over. I've never sat behind the DM screen again. The worst part? We were all roommates, and the one that messed with my scenario the most was my husband.
@@benjiro8793 yeah, we didn't test the dm overly much, and especially not with pulling stupid stunts like that. He hated us because my husband was insanely lucky all the time. If we needed a life saving roll because our pyromaniac wizard let off a too big a spell, he would be the one to roll it. Stuff like that, but we kept it fair and fun, just a group of friends being silly rather than testing someone's patience.
So just to troll one of my players who was an annoying twat, I gave him a Really powerful intelligent talking +5 sword that was hemophobic (deathly afraid of blood). Whenever the sword would see blood (so anytime anyone got hit), or be swung at anything that *might* contain blood, it's let out a loud bloodcurdling shriek of fear and pass out, loosing it's hardness and basically turning into a useless limp noodle. It actually had a fair bit of non combat use since it was very intelligent, had several knowledge skills, and could detect magic and identify magic items, but the player never bothered to figure any of that out and basically threw it away when he figured out he couldn't use it in combat.
sounds like brainless warrior tool. id have been curious about y and asked many questions and if i didnt get much answers either way or sarcastic denial hinting at more and had to roll a few 20s i to find out its true capabilities i wouldve done so thru multiple games. hopefully the DM id b playing with who gave me the sword wouldnt see me as such an annoying twat to troll me without allowing me to learn my lesson without a reward and the sword would b like urs rather just b hemophobic and a hunk of junk for petty revenge. tho considering how much this sounds like id have hounded them for said reward i think theyd spill it and say i couldve gotten that if had been less annoying and not pestered so much but now the sword is only what it seems, a hunk of phobic scrap metal. :P lol
Worst Co-worker story: So at my old job, I use to work for a cleaning company on a military base...the idea is that we drive around base cleaning buildings we're contracted to clean...Vacuuming, Sweeping, Mopping, bathrooms, trash...you name it Now onto the topic I had at least 9 co-workers who refused to do work and instead made ME do the work or "You will be reported for not doing any work" I quit that job right at the start of their busiest week DnD Story: So this one time I gave them a particular ring, what they misidentified: a ring of persuasion What it actually was: A Chatter Ring (Cursed ring that basically says, once you start talking...YOU CAN'T STOP!!!) They used it as bait for a bandit to take notice, caught him the moment he started talking.
I'm a housekeeper in a known hotel chain, so I'm just cleaning and running around 8+ hours. This channel keeps me entertained and gets me through my day💜
I had a coworker that I was managing a retail store with (I was 2IC and he was the manager) and he was creepy from day one. During the store opening while he, myself, another store manager, and a young female part-timer were setting up the brand new store he openly joked about going to brothels, and especially all Asian brothels, as he likes them "smaller so they look younger." He once even bragged about seeing a high priced prostitute when he was flown interstate by the company for a manager's conference. After a few weeks, the part-time worker hired stopped showing up and wouldn't answer calls. He claimed ignorance and my area manager just said "it happens" and he was soon moved to a new store. Only after I left the company I found out he quit when a few female staff came forward with sexual harassment claims.
I don't speak German, but that actually makes a bit of sense when you translate the word more literally into English. But we don't call our turds, crack sausage... yet...
Worst coworker: I was to be very friendly with everybody, the company's policy. I did and ended up working with one of the senior employees almost all the time. We would talk a lot. He would mention his plans for Christmas, the fact that we never had enough room on the shelves for the products, etc. I would agree with him though I would try to find explanations for all of these issues. Sometimes I would jokingly mention some of the issues I met such as being too small to reach some products. I would always laugh while talking about that. Some times later, I was scolded by my boss for being disrespectful towards the company. My coworker told our boss everything I said except for the fact that I was ALWAYS answering to his own complaints. Once he even told me that I was being unlucky because of my supervisor (he was not supervised anymore unlike me), I never answered as it was a bit awkward. That conversation was brought back when I was getting scold except that suddenly I was the one complaining about my supervisor. They told me they would end my contract by the end of the month. When I left, my coworker simply said that he was sorry that my own words led to me being fired. Even now, I'm still wary I might be framed so I don't talk to any of my coworkers, except for the bare minimum I have to share.
Reply to the DM Question: I once was running a small homebrew D&D campaign for a few friends and at some point one of them bought a bonsai tree from a shop. It was magic, and at the time all it did was wiggle if given a rhythm. So pretty much it was a dancing bonsai tree. Well, one day they need a distraction so the bard grabs up this little tree, takes it to the center of town, and starts playing music. I figure this was a fun bit so when he rolled to perform the song it was a critical success. I figured they should be rewarded for this fun little outing so the tree danced and danced more excitedly until there was a magical explosion and a beautiful woman appeared. She stated she was the goddess of the dance and gave the party her blessing, which gave them a small bonus to performances that involved dancing. Lol
The Kobold story reminds me of the first campaign I was in. My DM let us get an uncommon magical item, so since I was a druid, I chose the staff of the python. What ended up happening was we were fighting some kobolds. A few were flying kobolds so they were trying to fly away. So what I did was throw my staff to one, say catch, and then used my action to turn it into a giant constrictor snake. Needless to say, the Kobold was crushed.
@@Nerobyrne hahahahahahaha maybe you guys have the one that is always on "problem solving" mode and doesn't let people finish talking before trying to solve all the problems
I'm no DM, but I've got a favorite homebrew joke item. This was probably less than a year ago, but still one of the first sessions I ever participated in. A Dracolich had given the other 3 party members each a puzzle, and in return for the correct answer the Tiefling Bard/Sorcerer asked that they be teleported back to Highdock. The other two got their pick of 3 magical items, but they could only ask one question to determine which one they would rather take. Important to note that my character did not get to pick one, because she had joined the party *after* the Dracolich offered the challenge. She was a Pixie who got summoned by a botched Summon Familiar ritual when the Tiefling's magic went rogue. She spent the puzzle challenge getting to know the Half-Orc Rogue and eating free pastries. Okay back to the magical items. Sorry this is taking so long. The Dragonborn and the Half-Orc chose items that turned out to be a Smiting Branch and a Reaper's Finger (not important what they do, just know they can deal a lot of damage). The third item *(the purpose of this entire comment)* was a sash printed with pictures of "pickles" that smelled strongly of cucumbers. My Pixie was very interested in it. It turns out that the sash would shrink to fit anybody (even the Pixie), and would allow you to carry 100 lbs more than you could otherwise -- sort of okay for most races, but would multiply a Pixie's weight limit by ELEVEN. Its name? The Unencumbered Cucumber Cummerbund. If you know exactly where that name originates from, PLEASE reply to let me know there's someone who recognizes it besides me and my DM! Thistle was very disappointed that nobody pick(l)ed it.
I was in a Persona themed DnD server where we had a scenario where we were Persona users in a virtual reality fending off Shadows. One of the enemy Shadows we faced dropped an item called the Mark of Cain, which was an item that if the user of the consumable item used it and damaged a Shadow with the same arcana, they take seven times the same damage. The boss we faced was of the Magician Arcana. Our Magician Persona user had the bright idea to confuse the boss, who was highly susceptible to status effects, use the item on herself, then charm herself, putting her on the same team as the boss. The boss's rolls kept having bad rolls and attacked her, which in turn gave the boss septuple the damage, while our healer just kept healing her to prevent her from dying and wasting the item. The DM was kind of impressed at first, until it happened again in the next dungeon and he had to give bosses immunity to status effects thereafter. Edit: it was the Mark of Cain. Not the Seal of Solomon. My mistake
I was running a D&D campaign once, and one of the players kept getting on my nerves, so I gave him a magical ring with a brown stone on it that once put on, it could not be removed by his own will. Any time he rolled his d20 the ring was activated. It would either unleash a rabid chipmunk that would tear through his clothes and steal all his gold, or make him shit his pants depending on whether it was an odd or even number that he rolled. He also lost 1HP every time. After going through that for about an hour, he finally asked me if there was anything he could do to get rid of the ring. I told him that if he would stop being an asshole, I would take the ring back. The rest of the game went great.
I make similar content to rslash, my dream is to hit 1000 subs on youtube I'm 1/10 of the way, can you guys help me reach my goal? Regardless, stay safe and take care!!!!!
R Nickerson not really copy cuz there’s a lot of people doing reddit videos, the only similarity are the readings, the content i make is more similar to Storytime with Reddit
I remember a friend playing DnD and somehow the hot moody rogue got a hold of a frying pan that did no damage but still inflicted the pain of being hit by a iron cast frying pan.
Imagine you fire an employee at your own restaurant. Then the next day that employee brings the cops and says, "this person said they were gonna shoot me". Then u say no I said I was gonna fire u then I did. Same thing firing is shooting.
3:19 in High-school there was two students who were allergic to aerosols, so any pressurized thing in a can, one was deathly allergic and had a reaction when walking down the hallway with the gym because someone in my grade thought it would be funny to start an AXE war with a contraband aerosol can, turns out just about everyone had an AXE can in their locker......In the end everyone was okay, but the damage had been done.
I had just started a late-shift customer service job at a new business, and had forgotten to bring "lunch". We had some overcooked products that were being discarded, and the manager offered them to me as they'd be going to the trash anyway. A few days later, as I was handling some of our regular customers during the morning rush, the owner came in and started screaming at me that I was fired for "stealing from the company" and that he'd "call the cops". He saw me eating the product, counted the till, hadn't checked the book showing the product accounted for, nor checked with the manager to find out what happened. Instead, he lambasted and fired me in front of people, hours after my shift had actually ended because I wound up covering for one of his children who "couldn't make it". Needless to say, I didn't get into trouble with the police, but he also didn't pay me my last cheque, and the union decided that it wouldn't be worth the trouble to go after it. Fuck that guy.
Whoa! I was pretty confused during the last half. (I am no gamer.) I appreciate the effort rSlash. And it seems like a lot of your fans really enjoyed it! But... can we please please please have another choosing beggars soon? Besides me that is. Plllleeeeeaaaaase!?!?
Your Cobolt story reminds me of something I did with them once. We were in a haunted house and when we got to the kitchen we found a scared little Cobolt in the dumbwaiter. He served as a shopkeeper midway through the dungeon and was completley friendly and very timid. Flashforward to later in the house and we find these two ghost children who provide us with a catch22. They need us to kill a monster in the basement but they are also afraid to be left alone. You would have to either get some amazing persuasion rolls or leave a party member behind. As we were only a party of 3, a rogue, a monk(me), and a druid, we didn't want to leave someone behind for a boss fight. That's when I got an idea. I told the rogue to stay with the kids and asked the druid to accompany me, and went back to the kitchen. I went to the dumbwaiter and the Cobolt happily greeted me with "Hello again friend, what do you need?" To which I replied, "Do you want to make some more friends" This got the Cobolt interested enough to tentatively follow me out of the kitchen and back to the top floor. We had him keep the ghost kids company while the whole party fought the boss.
Okay so my friend got some dnd stuff and we started playing dnd with some of our friends (it was all of our first times). So when I was making my character, I decided to base it on Ron Swanson which ended me up with -1 charisma. So my friend was the dm and she said that if I seduced enough stuff she would increase my charisma. Que me attempting to seduce literally everything. One time I rolled a nat20 and seduced a door.
In a game I was in once, my barbarian found a halberd. After getting it, she kept rolling 20s, critting, even one-shotting anything that got near her. The wizard in the group wanted to check out what the halberd was exactly but my barbarian didn't care since it kept her killing up and refused to let the wizard near her. Good thing she did, as when she passed due to her curse, the wizard finally identified the halberd. It was enchanted to be uber powerful as long as you didn't know what was making you so powerful (I forget the exact wording of this part) so it lost all power after the wizard did this. The rest of the party was pissed at the wizard for not only ruining the greatest item ever but disrespecting my barbarian after her death. They ended up burying the halberd with her so that was super nice. When I DMed a few rounds (the normal DM put me in charge when his wife gave birth), I did something similair to rSlash and the box. Though mine was trapped boxes. The wizard (same guy too) kept telling them not to touch the boxes but they wouldn't listen. They were so injured all the time. They did get something like a pet Mimic in the end though. It was a living box that could store anything and everything safely with no limit but it had a mind of its own and kept wandering off with all their shit inside.
Some lady who worked for my mom lived in the office for like a week, my mom was so shocked that she had to *tell* her subordinates that they can’t live at work
For a coworker I have 2. One who had their desk full of pictures and one of those doll heads you can brush. The pictures were serial killers and the doll head looked like it had been tortured and probably raped. He got fired for stalking staff and customers. The second one was a guy aged 45-50 who talked to a 16 year old customer and then wrote down their details and sent them pictures of otters. He was fired for stalking. Both got jail time from it too.
The comment about create water reminded me of my favorite "exploit" with magical items: the Arrowhead of Total Destruction (not my original idea). For those who don't know it's an arrowhead with the arrowhead replaced by an open bag of holding and a tube suspended above it at the "tip" by some metal frames a thin wooden retaining rod. The tube contains a rolled-up portable hole. When fired, the wooden rod breaks and the tube/portable hole tip is pushed into the bag of holding, creating a rift to the astral plane and destroying everything in a 10-foot radius. Used it once. DM never gave us a portable hole again.
Dude second my boss boss dumps trash on my desk I would have said “I quit, looking at the garbage, oh wait I didn’t realize I was looking at the garbage and not you”
Worst Co-worker, So I was working as a cook at this golf course for Rich folk (6+ years ago) and one day we get this new hire, Paul. You see, Paul's parents were members and got their just graduated high school son a job as a dish washer in our kitchen. You would think one person washing dishes for 5 hours couldn't cause so many problems on their first day, but some how this weakest link was like cancer to the entire kitchen. Never had I seen such chaos in the kitchen all because he wouldn't stay focus on HIS ONE JOB. He wasn't even working alone as a dish washer and yet the back up he caused was greater than any Winter Holiday event or New Years that I had worked. During just a LUNCH RUSH on a June Saturday he broke plates and glasses, dropped every 5th utensil handed to him on the floor, was told to dry something and would just put it down still wet, kept trying to walk away from his station, and started arguments with every male employee who raised their voice to him. Yet the cherry on top of this bad day. Paul just got a new Iphone a few days before starting and forgot his charger at home. Not wanting to drive home with an low battery, Paul decided to follow the advice on a rumor he heard and put his brand new Iphone in our kitchen's microwave. Thats right, Paul thought that if you put your Iphone in the microwave for 1 minute it would be fully charged. You would think a person couldn't be that dumb, but then I saw the sparks coming from our microwave. Long story short, Paul was fired on his first of work (Officially the day after) and we had to get a new microwave. His official reason for being fired: "For causing chaos in the work place".
I cant even pinpoint the worst coworker I ever had haha. I had one that pretty much everyday had some story about something rude she'd done and got me thrown under the bus a lot but I don't remember more than a handful of experiences. A coworker who treated me like crap for weeks then managed to get my 2 bosses and herself in on a cornered scream session that made me cry, she convinced them I had been rude so she got to scream at me for HER behavior. Or the special little darling studying to be a dietitian who didn't believe ANYONE that i was 9 months pregnant. She was so convinced I was just very fat she slacked off in her job so Id have to pick up her slack saying "I could use the exercise", keep in mind because of her I was 9 months pregnant as a shift lead in a hospital, and pulled double shifts because of her calling out last minute. That was her answer even for that... exercise I desperately needed. She even had her friends harass me all hours of the day (she stole my number from the employee call log), about dieting techniques I should immediately get on because my weight was unhealthy and unbecoming. Only reason she's not the worst was the other 2 I worked with for 3 years, she only stayed 5 months and was gone when my maternity leave was over. Screw them all 🤷♀️
I know a guy with Asperger's and he takes over every conversation whether he was in it or not. He will walk up to random people talking about something else and just start talking about what's going on in his life. People will skillfully end his conversation or steer away from it and the next time there is even the slightest lull in talking he will start up again as if the subject never changed. Sometimes if people are talking too much for him to get a word in (often intentionally) he will just start talking over them about his stuff. He will randomly tell strangers what he plans to make for dinner.
Worst coworker was my second bakery manager when I worked at Walmart. Honestly, the department ran better WITHOUT them (we had to wait about 4 months for them to transfer to our store). For their first 6 months, not a single person in bakery OR deli could figure out what they did for 8 hours a day, aside from moving table around (which were always moved back to their original position by my next shift). They also tried to get everyone else to do their job; including ordering people from produce or deli to do things. One time, I was called in by an assistant manager on my day off to do cake decorating. I clarified to the assistant manager that I would ONLY do cakes, as I knew the bakery manager was in. They agreed. Low and behold, as soon as I got in, the bakery manager tried to tell me to do something else. I said no, was called in only to do cakes. They ran to a DIFFERENT assistant manager, who tried to tell me I had to listen to bakery manager. Told assistant manager that the other assistant manager had agreed to me doing only cakes, as that was what they needed. Didn't say anything else to me. Think that was the point bakery manager started hating me, because I didn't bend to their "power". Zero respect for this person. That was the only coworker I WASN'T sad to say goodbye too when I left only a few months later
RSlash is so refreshing tbh. Every channel that reads Reddit stories or memes uses the same British tts voice and its obnoxious. Good stuff for continuing to read it yourself, it's actually the most effort you can put into these videos. Your voice is really nice tbh, and it seriously makes a huge difference
My worst coworker was a shipmate in the Navy. He didn't shower. He didn't wash his clothes. He was sent the kitchens to fulfill the food service attendant requirement. The Culinary Specialists quickly found out that he wasn't fit to work with food. He was sent the the trash room then he just lived with the trash instead of clearing it. It got so bad that a 1st class had to watch him shower and wash his clothes
I worked at a marijuana greenhouse for a while just to pay bills. One of my coworkers was this older Mexican lady who didn't really speak English too well. She was stubborn, argumentative, told the bosses off for trying to get her to do stuff, messed up my work, and even tried to get me in trouble after I told her what she was doing wrong. I went to college in the veterinary technician program, and we would have to come in at 6 AM and 6 PM on scheduled days to take care of the animals. We always knew ahead of time. I still heard stories about idiots who showed up to their 6 AM shift hung over. One of them ended up puking in a litterbox.
Am I the only one that loves how he crops the text and only adds parts when he reads it instead of just using the entire picture from the begging? I have a tendency to read beforehand but with this i can’t and it’s so nice idk why
I once gave a player a necklace with multicolored pearls. Homebrew magic item. Each one had a chance at a negative side effect, but the two most memorable ones were 1) summon a nonmagical animal companion, but because of bad luck the wearer turned into a Vaporeon 2) all spells below lvl 3 cost no spell slots, but all are centered on the user 2nd one is now fondly remembered by the specific player as the "Kamikaze fireball incident"
Two Responses. I had a "Daniel" at my work, pure dumbass who wore Goth/Heavy Metal clothes that were terribly co-ordinated. He looked like a cartoon. He'd always be listening to some garbage scream music on the bus (I worked a job where all 60 workes took the same bus every morning from the train station) on his headphones. I know it was scream music because the Headphones either didn't do their job at all or he was listening on max volume because you could hear them on a crowded bus ten feet away. I saw him go to the bathroom once (we were both in line). He let out a "WHOO!", slapped himself on the back and moonwalked into the booth like... well like an absolute idiot. Whatever he'd eaten... was loud, even through the door you could hear his grunts, groans and eventual "WHOO-HOOS!" whenever he dropped a deuce. I decided it was safer for my mental health to hold it in and went to a further away toilet. As for the dumbest item a DM gave me it was a bottle of Infinite Alcohol for my Dwarven Drunken Fist Monk. The bottle would pour whatever drink I wanted and not stop until told so. So the second we came to a cave I slowly but surely spent three days flooding the Goblin's Nest with Vodka before tossing a Torch inside. The DM was not amused and my Bottle was nerfed to 1d6 Liters per day, to be rolled each morning. So then I just started bottling the most expensive alcohol my Character knew off and used it to buy cheaper Alcohols he preferred. Rolled high on the History check so I knew of a rare Alcohol worth 5 Gold per Litre
I'm a nursing assistant, and I worked with another trained licenced nursing assistant that literally asked me how to give someone a shower. My explanation was "the same way you take a shower. Except you have to help them get their clothing off and wash parts they can't reach.". And she said "okay. How do I do that?" Face, meet palm.
yaaaas D&D!! I gave my players a bag of devouring, and a special magical golden apple that would turn it into a functional bag of holding/trash bag, but the kobold player decided to cut it in half and give one to the bag and eat the rest 😂 needless to say he has now turned himself into semi functional dual bag of holding with a 10% chance to devour.
Worst co-worker I ever had was definitely an absolute looper I had on my crew while working on a passenger ferry. She was brought on with the seasonal intake and I helped train her group. From day one we knew she was going to cause problems. She wasn't stupid as the theory "classroom" stuff she picked up quite quick and had no trouble remembering. It was the actual physical sea survival training she had issue with. That's when all sorts of ailments came up. After a simple "you don't pass, you have no job and you don't prove you can do this part then you don't pass" she managed to barely scrape by. Barely 4 weeks into the season this looper faked breathing difficulties to the extent an emergency airlift had to be requested while at sea. We had 3 passengers, 1 doctor and 2 nurses look at her not 100% convinced it was real but because they couldn't guarantee she was in fact faking the call had to be made. I was one of 3 crew on that day that had been trained for airlift so I had to go with her. Even though looper was crew a member of crew still has to go with the casualty. On a plus side, airlift at sea onto a Sea King?! Sign me up! Airlift from a passenger ferry with 600 passengers onbaord is not to be taken lightly though. In short it's bloody dangerous. When we landed there was an ambulance waiting to rush her to hospital. I had to call a taxi to follow. Taxi took about 25mins to show up and it was another 10min drive to the hospital. By the time I got to the hospital looper had already been looked over and had ficken made a run for it when they found nothing wrong with her at all! Police caught up with her a few days later after a complaint was made by the Ferry operator and HM Coastgaurd. The airlift itself caused a 45min delay to the sailing as the ship had to change course and sail away from where we were meant to be heading so the helicopter could make it's lift. 600+ passengers now 45mins late. To top it off it was a full load booked back out and because the ship was now down 2 crew they couldn't leave until cover could be found so add ANOTHER hour and a half delay to the next group of 750 passengers! Also consider that crew had yet ANOTHER trip to make before end of shift those delays fickne hurt... all because Looper didn't like working in the Brasserie and the best way out of work is "Breathing difficulties" of course.
My own dnd story. I was a party member, not the DM. So we had a ranger on our team who quickly earned the nickname "pothead". Not for drug usage, but because he literally wore a metal pot as a hat 24/7. However this was a magic pot, (none of us knew where it came from cause he had it before he joined the party) and anything put in the pot would never fall out, even if the pot was completely upside down. So he didn't just have a pot on his head, he had *a pot of soup* on his head. It gets better though. After every battle Pothead would add some kind of enemy remains (like scales, eyes, fingers, fur ect.) To the pot and it progressively got grosser and grosser. Around level 5 we had a tough battle coming up and our rogue (one of the 2 team leaders) got the idea to try dipping some of his crossbow bolts in the soup. They dealt bonus poison damage. After that we all started dipping blades and arrows/bolts in the soup before any anticipated encounters.
"How is it even possible to live in an office and be late for work?"
Because you have to wake up early, tidy up your living space, then get out of the building so you can pretend to arrive at the office around the same time as everybody else. If something goes wrong, you may end up "trapped" in the building.
I feel like he could have worked around that by playing the 'I arrived earlier than everyone else' card due to some excuse.
@@RiehentarWhat if they lock up at the end of the day. Kinda hard to tell the guy with the key in his hand you got in early that day
Toby H bingo Hahahaha
Talking from experience?
Seems pretty suspicious to me 🤔
Okay, the kobold in the box thing almost made me piss myself laughing. I haven't slept and I'm completely punchy, and laughing in that insane way that makes my wife think that my mind has finally snapped. Kudos on making me giggle so hard that it scared my poor wife awake, lol.
Poor kubold
That's like Schrodinger's cat dilemma, only much worse.
@@ImaginaryCyborg and from the cat perspective
Came here to say the same thing, man, that was hilarious. That poor bastard.
Me too!
rSlash: "OGRE! OGRE! OGRE!"
rSlash's neighbors: "What the...?!"
my dad was in a campaign once where the DM gave his party two rings and when you put your hand through one, it would appear out the other. The DM though they wouldn't find a use for it. What did they do? They tied one to the tank and the cleric held the other so that the cleric could hit the tank with the touch heal spells without actually being near the tank.
Now you're thinking with portals
When Rslash cusses
YT DEMONETIZED
When someone breaks into another persons home
YT that’s some quality content put them on trending and give them a bunch of money
Yeah that happens a lot
When some one films a dead body and makes fun of mental health
YT give home millions of millions of dollars
he whines about it yet does it knowing full well that it’s getting hit. he had been at it for 18 months by then, it’s him doing it to himself due to his laziness than TH-cam being petty
"This guy named Daniel I used to work with at McDonald's..."
Me, who used to work at McDonald's: Wait, what?
"...in High School..."
Me, who worked there when I was in High School: Oh, no 😟
"He let everyone know he worked out and enjoyed being on the football team."
Me, a lardass: Oh, thank God 😁
🤣🤣🤣
😂😂😂😂
Nuff of a scare though, huh?
lmaoooo
😂😂😂
How did your wife feel when you shouted “OGRE!” 😆
I like the idea she just stopped for a moment, rolled her eyes and then carried on with whatever she was doing having lived with him for long enough not to be surprised anymore 😂
That's probably the safe word 😂
TheAwesomeDoggo DnD
Me when Rslash says “Shit”: *Suprised pikachu face*
**demonetisation has entered the chat**
LMAO
HE DID WHAT😱
rSlash: *Curses*
The comments: Wait, that's illegal.
Im goma say the f Word!
He said shit at 3:18
I make similar content to rslash, my dream is to hit 1000 subs on youtube I'm 1/10 of the way, can you guys help me reach my goal? Regardless, stay safe and take care!!!!!
It cant be!!!!
Omg you said the fuck word
I was in a D&D session where the DM created a bow called 'The Bow of Immolation' where each shot would set the target on fire but have a 1/10 chance to set the wielder on fire instead.
The guy who had it used it twice, the 2nd time, he burned to death.
I dunno about d d, how does it work
10 chances to shoot, one chance to die
Reminds me of when I "invented" molotov cocktail arrows in a campaign, they actually were very effective, did normal arrow damage, plus burning damage (if the roll was successful) and had a small area affect lighting stuff around on fire too. Problem was, we also had a magic crystal that the DM warned us would explode if it caught fire... we were losing a battle pretty badly and I told the guy carrying it to chuck it at the enemy and then I would cause it to explode with my special arrows. Both the rolls were successful, I killed all the enemies... and all of us, turns out when the DM said explode what he ment was detonate like a mother effing nuke. Lol
both of these are hilarious
I need to try D&D it sounds so fun
@@matthewhalo1799 It's fun, but make sure to play with friends for an extra layer of bullshit lmao
Yesss my daily audio coffee 🙌🏻
Never have I agreed with a post more than this and yet I dont know why
@@lucareid8315 I have never agreed more with a reply than this and yet I don't know why
@Keir Lewis Meredith-Miller I have never agreed more with a reply of a reply than this and yet I don't know why
Yes just yes
Are you really copying yesterday’s top comment?
I was in a campaign once where someone tried to overpower themselves with a magical gauntlet they said they had and the DM wasn't going to have that so what the DM did was make it to where the gauntlet would talk to the player so every like 15 minutes the player would have to do a sanity roll because the gauntlet. We would start a battle and the DM would look at the player and just say "do a sanity roll"
This remided me of our game. Husband's character was a warforge and our key interrogation/torture tactic was to have him sit with the person and just talk... for days, while the rest of the group just went along on their business. It was hillarious
Played a similar campaign... played a human necromancer penned by the master (he liked to write stories for the characters as well, and we players acted them out) and she had a... quirky spear.. It used to belong to an evil lich so under its influence my character was Chaotic Evil at the best of times.
Once, the party was ambushed by trolls, huge 5meters tall monsters that were clubbing at us and we desperately trying to dodge/parry for our lives - typical setting really... after the battle, the poor healer didn't have enough STamina to heal everyone, so the necromancer got bullied into helping out (one of the requisites for necromancy is the basic heal skill) but the necromancer, who can only be coaxed and not coerced got so mad I had to roll a will power/sanity roll and lost miserably... the outcome? I rolled for helping out the party or act out. Since as a player what I wanted was to help my party, one can guess what happened - The necromancer helpfully helped to heal... the trolls. Only my hand had been cursed by luck and I rolled another pit. Turns out the evil lich in the spear chose to act up and my critical miss turned into a blessing for evil's shenanigans. The trolls were fully revived as mofo zombies trolls with 3x as much stamina and hp, strenght and a thirst for blood.
Whole party wiped out except for the necromancer, who was possessed and laughing maniacaly as everyone died... to save the campaign, the master declared everything was actually a dream induced by magic mushrooms spores our hunter failed to detect... I spitefully had my necromancer revive the next troll we met and kept the rotting, huge zombie following me around and grossing everyone we met - good times. The master never handed me a necromancer role ever again.
One of our players ended up with a powerful mace... that was haunted by the spirit of his dead apprentice, a little boy, who he had stupidly dragged along on our adventures and gotten him killed. The boy's spirit turned evil- from the master-didn't-protect-me or the betrayal of not being allowed to rest in peace, never found out. It thoroughly wanted to kill the entire party, and the player refused to get rid of it.
It took a while, but we all eventually had to make new characters, and the spirit escaped to cause havoc on the world.
Not the most useless item I have given them but I gave one of my players a staff of cats that, one of its abilities polymorphed someone into a cat for 1 minute (at the cost of all its charges for that day), to make a long story short they polymorphed and NPC(18 Levels in Druid) and stuffed them in a bag of holding...
EDIT: Now thinking about it, it is the most useless item I gave them, they bought/stole the rest...
That kobold story reminds me of a time when my party, while travelling through a dungeon, found a fountain full of Potion of Dragon's Breath. We didn't know what it was. So we took the Goblin captive we were using as a guide and threw him in. Not "made him drink it," but actually hurled this goblin into the fountain. Thing came up breathing fire and we decapitated it. Contaminated the fountain, making it useless.
That must have been terrifying!
I remember once as a DM I gave the players a : "Rat of Opening" in a special bag. The rat was an item that would three times a day be able to open a simple lock by taking it out of the bag and whirling it above your head and then smacking it against the lock. Sadly it also had a powerful flaw as well, THE SMELL, as the item was a dead rat about a week expired but necromantically held in stasis. The second you removed it from the special bag it would fill a room with the "Funk of Ages" a potent skunk-like cloying smell and monsters LOVED IT so any nearby with a decent "nose" were drawn to it. The players were all serious role-players and drama students so we all had to RP the scenes when the rat was used. Merit/Flaw magic items were very common for our group to seed into the campaigns, this one was my favorite and I would love to hear about other similar items/stories. Is there a subreddit like /EntitledPeople or R/JustnoHOA for AD&D stories? Thanks and Keep up the great content rSlash :)
One time during dnd my group was trying to kill an archer while I was trying to capture him. Earlier in the game we captured a goblin and I had him basically stuffed in my item pouch. While trying to catch the archer I ran out of ideas and just pegged the goblin at the guy. It did not work.
LOL! That sounds like something my teammate might do! He is an half orc named AL Gore and he is an environmentalist so as long as the environment is safe he will do anything!
I feel like I’ve seen this in the comments before. I still find it hilarious
Can someone please tell me abt this game.
I had no idea what r slash was talking abt.
@@duckman03 dungeons and dragons is a board game where you make charavters and role play, fighting and msking choices based off a die roll
@@duckman03 just look it up...??
Please do more dnd stories, listening to how creative and ridiculous player ideas are is one of my favorite things as the resident Forever DM
The create water post reminded me of when my husband and I played DnD with a group of friends years ago. He was a warforge cleric and used the create water spell for murder. Touch someone and create water in the hollow areas of the body i.e. the lungs. It was highly effective, but it meant that he constantly needed to do good things to keep himself on the 'good' spectrum for his spells to work. We were a special bunch. I was a blacksmith barbarian (for the strength bonus) because we had 2 warforges, had a wizard that was a pyromaniac, a clumsy rogue and a ranger who usually got lost. The DM both hated and loved us
@@benjiro8793 To be fair, some campaigns need to be tested out like that. You cant have a DM save everyone all the time. If you can kill a quest NPC, then the quest isnt essential and you can either loot the reward off the NPC or encounter the loot naturally on accident.
If the DM keeps saving your ass and allows situations like that to happen with little to no consequences, then ofcourse you might aswell do dumb shit all the time. A DM needs to be firm in consequences, otherwise why not fuck around? I mean, lets take an RPG like Morrowind for example, you can literally kill off some NPC's that are essential to finishing the story line, and you can also just walk to the final objective of the main story line at the start of the game and finish the game in minutes. Your actions have consequences, but taking a risk can reward you massively. While those guys were genuinely fucking about, you should be more strict in consequences, even if they are friends. You cant have someone kill an NPC that is the only person who knows the password to a door and accidentally have that door opened because its needed to progress. They should roll 2 20 faced dice, rolling a set double number(probably double 20) to guess the word correctly, and perhaps even a double 1 to open up a deadly trap that could kill them. That can literally force them to roll 30 minutes long, possibly killing themselves and since that is boring as hell with an actual risk involved, they probably would take the rest of the objectives more serious.
If their actions dont have real consequences and they even get rewarded otherwise, meaning they never truly get punished, what would be a reason to take it seriously?
@@benjiro8793 I had similar happen, only it was three experienced DMs (all DMing for more than five years) and the campaign we'd been playing was my first game. THEY insisted I give DMing a try, and spent more than a week talking me into it. Then they messed around with the little scenario I put together and stressed over. I've never sat behind the DM screen again.
The worst part? We were all roommates, and the one that messed with my scenario the most was my husband.
@@benjiro8793 yeah, we didn't test the dm overly much, and especially not with pulling stupid stunts like that. He hated us because my husband was insanely lucky all the time. If we needed a life saving roll because our pyromaniac wizard let off a too big a spell, he would be the one to roll it. Stuff like that, but we kept it fair and fun, just a group of friends being silly rather than testing someone's patience.
After hearing Rslash censor himself for a long time, hearing him curse comes out of nowhere
When he started, he didn't censor at all. But YT said, you want the Mons, then you need to censor.
So just to troll one of my players who was an annoying twat, I gave him a Really powerful intelligent talking +5 sword that was hemophobic (deathly afraid of blood). Whenever the sword would see blood (so anytime anyone got hit), or be swung at anything that *might* contain blood, it's let out a loud bloodcurdling shriek of fear and pass out, loosing it's hardness and basically turning into a useless limp noodle. It actually had a fair bit of non combat use since it was very intelligent, had several knowledge skills, and could detect magic and identify magic items, but the player never bothered to figure any of that out and basically threw it away when he figured out he couldn't use it in combat.
Xarestrill I want this item!
That's so interesting
I initially read hemophobic as homophobic. I was really confused what one had to do with the other at first.
sounds like brainless warrior tool.
id have been curious about y and asked many questions and if i didnt get much answers either way or sarcastic denial hinting at more and had to roll a few 20s i to find out its true capabilities i wouldve done so thru multiple games. hopefully the DM id b playing with who gave me the sword wouldnt see me as such an annoying twat to troll me without allowing me to learn my lesson without a reward and the sword would b like urs rather just b hemophobic and a hunk of junk for petty revenge. tho considering how much this sounds like id have hounded them for said reward i think theyd spill it and say i couldve gotten that if had been less annoying and not pestered so much but now the sword is only what it seems, a hunk of phobic scrap metal. :P lol
The +3 coconut kills me, and apparently a lot of other people as well!
rSlash: Curses
Everyone: Wait, that's illegal
Worst Co-worker story:
So at my old job, I use to work for a cleaning company on a military base...the idea is that we drive around base cleaning buildings we're contracted to clean...Vacuuming, Sweeping, Mopping, bathrooms, trash...you name it
Now onto the topic
I had at least 9 co-workers who refused to do work and instead made ME do the work or "You will be reported for not doing any work" I quit that job right at the start of their busiest week
DnD Story:
So this one time I gave them a particular ring, what they misidentified: a ring of persuasion
What it actually was: A Chatter Ring (Cursed ring that basically says, once you start talking...YOU CAN'T STOP!!!)
They used it as bait for a bandit to take notice, caught him the moment he started talking.
Rslash: *posts*
Everyone who's early: Quick think of something funny
That’s literally my thought process i-
Ye
Well yes but no
Most say "I'm first" or "WOW 100 Comments no views omg lol"
@Alex t why?
@@Jose-ee2se 1st off, to help with the challenge, 2nd, that's his business, isn't it?
I've watched this one before but "he was the best man at my wedding" made me roar with laughter in a way it definitely didn't last time!
I'm a housekeeper in a known hotel chain, so I'm just cleaning and running around 8+ hours. This channel keeps me entertained and gets me through my day💜
"So what your saying is Daniel literally couldnt keep that shit to himself." That was gold.
I had a coworker that I was managing a retail store with (I was 2IC and he was the manager) and he was creepy from day one. During the store opening while he, myself, another store manager, and a young female part-timer were setting up the brand new store he openly joked about going to brothels, and especially all Asian brothels, as he likes them "smaller so they look younger." He once even bragged about seeing a high priced prostitute when he was flown interstate by the company for a manager's conference.
After a few weeks, the part-time worker hired stopped showing up and wouldn't answer calls. He claimed ignorance and my area manager just said "it happens" and he was soon moved to a new store. Only after I left the company I found out he quit when a few female staff came forward with sexual harassment claims.
I love when I stay up the entire night, open up TH-cam and continue stay up longer because there’s an R/video up 😂
Your like me
You're
Same here bro
"Kackwurst" = "turd" in German ^^
I had to laugh when he read the username, because I understand German 😂
I don't speak German, but that actually makes a bit of sense when you translate the word more literally into English. But we don't call our turds, crack sausage... yet...
Worst coworker: I was to be very friendly with everybody, the company's policy. I did and ended up working with one of the senior employees almost all the time. We would talk a lot. He would mention his plans for Christmas, the fact that we never had enough room on the shelves for the products, etc. I would agree with him though I would try to find explanations for all of these issues. Sometimes I would jokingly mention some of the issues I met such as being too small to reach some products. I would always laugh while talking about that.
Some times later, I was scolded by my boss for being disrespectful towards the company. My coworker told our boss everything I said except for the fact that I was ALWAYS answering to his own complaints. Once he even told me that I was being unlucky because of my supervisor (he was not supervised anymore unlike me), I never answered as it was a bit awkward. That conversation was brought back when I was getting scold except that suddenly I was the one complaining about my supervisor.
They told me they would end my contract by the end of the month. When I left, my coworker simply said that he was sorry that my own words led to me being fired.
Even now, I'm still wary I might be framed so I don't talk to any of my coworkers, except for the bare minimum I have to share.
I'd take that company to court. Lots of violations there
Reply to the DM Question: I once was running a small homebrew D&D campaign for a few friends and at some point one of them bought a bonsai tree from a shop. It was magic, and at the time all it did was wiggle if given a rhythm. So pretty much it was a dancing bonsai tree. Well, one day they need a distraction so the bard grabs up this little tree, takes it to the center of town, and starts playing music. I figure this was a fun bit so when he rolled to perform the song it was a critical success. I figured they should be rewarded for this fun little outing so the tree danced and danced more excitedly until there was a magical explosion and a beautiful woman appeared. She stated she was the goddess of the dance and gave the party her blessing, which gave them a small bonus to performances that involved dancing. Lol
The Kobold story reminds me of the first campaign I was in. My DM let us get an uncommon magical item, so since I was a druid, I chose the staff of the python. What ended up happening was we were fighting some kobolds. A few were flying kobolds so they were trying to fly away. So what I did was throw my staff to one, say catch, and then used my action to turn it into a giant constrictor snake. Needless to say, the Kobold was crushed.
2:00 These people are sooooooo anoying!!! The office "Knowitall" and "Convo hog"...sucks...
Rlash: Uploads
Lost Genre 1 minute later: *Gives time stamp for 2 mins in*
Either we don't have that person at my office
....
or it's me! :O
@@Nerobyrne hahahahahahaha maybe you guys have the one that is always on "problem solving" mode and doesn't let people finish talking before trying to solve all the problems
Nice I know you
@@LostGenre oh yeah, that is DEFINATELY me.
I do actually solve problems though, so at least I'm not useless AND annoying.
Just annoying.
I'm no DM, but I've got a favorite homebrew joke item.
This was probably less than a year ago, but still one of the first sessions I ever participated in.
A Dracolich had given the other 3 party members each a puzzle, and in return for the correct answer the Tiefling Bard/Sorcerer asked that they be teleported back to Highdock. The other two got their pick of 3 magical items, but they could only ask one question to determine which one they would rather take.
Important to note that my character did not get to pick one, because she had joined the party *after* the Dracolich offered the challenge. She was a Pixie who got summoned by a botched Summon Familiar ritual when the Tiefling's magic went rogue. She spent the puzzle challenge getting to know the Half-Orc Rogue and eating free pastries.
Okay back to the magical items. Sorry this is taking so long. The Dragonborn and the Half-Orc chose items that turned out to be a Smiting Branch and a Reaper's Finger (not important what they do, just know they can deal a lot of damage). The third item *(the purpose of this entire comment)* was a sash printed with pictures of "pickles" that smelled strongly of cucumbers. My Pixie was very interested in it. It turns out that the sash would shrink to fit anybody (even the Pixie), and would allow you to carry 100 lbs more than you could otherwise -- sort of okay for most races, but would multiply a Pixie's weight limit by ELEVEN.
Its name?
The Unencumbered Cucumber Cummerbund.
If you know exactly where that name originates from, PLEASE reply to let me know there's someone who recognizes it besides me and my DM!
Thistle was very disappointed that nobody pick(l)ed it.
I'm confused how this went from worst coworker to funny d&d stories lol
Would anyone else pay money to hear a D&D podcast with rSlash as a player or DM?
all that D&D stuff went over my head
I was in a Persona themed DnD server where we had a scenario where we were Persona users in a virtual reality fending off Shadows. One of the enemy Shadows we faced dropped an item called the Mark of Cain, which was an item that if the user of the consumable item used it and damaged a Shadow with the same arcana, they take seven times the same damage. The boss we faced was of the Magician Arcana. Our Magician Persona user had the bright idea to confuse the boss, who was highly susceptible to status effects, use the item on herself, then charm herself, putting her on the same team as the boss. The boss's rolls kept having bad rolls and attacked her, which in turn gave the boss septuple the damage, while our healer just kept healing her to prevent her from dying and wasting the item. The DM was kind of impressed at first, until it happened again in the next dungeon and he had to give bosses immunity to status effects thereafter.
Edit: it was the Mark of Cain. Not the Seal of Solomon. My mistake
I’ve used “summon water” inside someone’s lungs before. Essentially drowning them on dry land.
I love that you did D&D stories today! I always listen to your videos but this one made me extra happy :)
I was running a D&D campaign once, and one of the players kept getting on my nerves, so I gave him a magical ring with a brown stone on it that once put on, it could not be removed by his own will. Any time he rolled his d20 the ring was activated. It would either unleash a rabid chipmunk that would tear through his clothes and steal all his gold, or make him shit his pants depending on whether it was an odd or even number that he rolled. He also lost 1HP every time. After going through that for about an hour, he finally asked me if there was anything he could do to get rid of the ring. I told him that if he would stop being an asshole, I would take the ring back. The rest of the game went great.
The D&D one sounded funny. But I didn’t get like 90% of it. The ogre one tho.... that killed me 😂
I feel like I know how the group in stranger things feel 😂
1 view 12 likes and 3 comments, “imma check the comm- oh there is a lot more then 3
128 coments.
I make similar content to rslash, my dream is to hit 1000 subs on youtube I'm 1/10 of the way, can you guys help me reach my goal? Regardless, stay safe and take care!!!!!
than*
@@Reign7
Wow you've literally copied rSlash and now you're using his platform to promote yourself...
R Nickerson not really copy cuz there’s a lot of people doing reddit videos, the only similarity are the readings, the content i make is more similar to Storytime with Reddit
8:50 I love when he does that. Funniest thing ever
Me too
I bet his wife is scared of a ogre in the house and called 911
I don’t know a thing about D&D, I didn’t even understand most of these stories, but somehow Rslash kept me entretaied every single second. Amazing.
Definitely glad I joined your channel been watching for a while and was waiting for the right time to join and I'm so glad I did
LMAO I love when you shout things from across the room to enhance the story telling. It's the *best* xD
6:17
Teared up your body?
Tore*
The story says tears too, so what're doing?
Check your own grammar before you check anyone else's
7:41 “pull the lever kronk” “Wrong lever”
Birds are weird... I just had one on my *head!*, then he wouldn’t get off! My little brother did get him off and then you uploaded, so now I’m here
Well thats just wied
What
I remember a friend playing DnD and somehow the hot moody rogue got a hold of a frying pan that did no damage but still inflicted the pain of being hit by a iron cast frying pan.
Imagine you fire an employee at your own restaurant. Then the next day that employee brings the cops and says, "this person said they were gonna shoot me". Then u say no I said I was gonna fire u then I did. Same thing firing is shooting.
I’m so mad at how hard I laughed at “Fire distinguisher” hahahaha
[insert text here]
[insert a clock at 6:30 here]
“Oh hey it’s six thirty!”
3:19 in High-school there was two students who were allergic to aerosols, so any pressurized thing in a can, one was deathly allergic and had a reaction when walking down the hallway with the gym because someone in my grade thought it would be funny to start an AXE war with a contraband aerosol can, turns out just about everyone had an AXE can in their locker......In the end everyone was okay, but the damage had been done.
First time being this early! :3 I LOVE your content, rSlash!
Congrats!
Cant even spell the name right lmaoo
Ok bois We need to find who the hell asked
@@rubenzonligt8940 Thanks for the clarification, lad.
I had just started a late-shift customer service job at a new business, and had forgotten to bring "lunch". We had some overcooked products that were being discarded, and the manager offered them to me as they'd be going to the trash anyway.
A few days later, as I was handling some of our regular customers during the morning rush, the owner came in and started screaming at me that I was fired for "stealing from the company" and that he'd "call the cops". He saw me eating the product, counted the till, hadn't checked the book showing the product accounted for, nor checked with the manager to find out what happened. Instead, he lambasted and fired me in front of people, hours after my shift had actually ended because I wound up covering for one of his children who "couldn't make it".
Needless to say, I didn't get into trouble with the police, but he also didn't pay me my last cheque, and the union decided that it wouldn't be worth the trouble to go after it.
Fuck that guy.
Whoa! I was pretty confused during the last half. (I am no gamer.) I appreciate the effort rSlash. And it seems like a lot of your fans really enjoyed it! But... can we please please please have another choosing beggars soon? Besides me that is. Plllleeeeeaaaaase!?!?
The DnD question is the greatest thing I've heard you cover in a long time. LOVED IT!!
I accidently read it as ASS CREDIT , tf is wrong with me
I had this kid in my school and talked about stuff that he had no idea about. He thought a dog was stronger than a bear
LMAO WHAT
16:30
The ch in chasm is pronounced like a K... it's like kasm.
Your Cobolt story reminds me of something I did with them once.
We were in a haunted house and when we got to the kitchen we found a scared little Cobolt in the dumbwaiter. He served as a shopkeeper midway through the dungeon and was completley friendly and very timid.
Flashforward to later in the house and we find these two ghost children who provide us with a catch22. They need us to kill a monster in the basement but they are also afraid to be left alone. You would have to either get some amazing persuasion rolls or leave a party member behind. As we were only a party of 3, a rogue, a monk(me), and a druid, we didn't want to leave someone behind for a boss fight.
That's when I got an idea. I told the rogue to stay with the kids and asked the druid to accompany me, and went back to the kitchen. I went to the dumbwaiter and the Cobolt happily greeted me with "Hello again friend, what do you need?"
To which I replied, "Do you want to make some more friends"
This got the Cobolt interested enough to tentatively follow me out of the kitchen and back to the top floor. We had him keep the ghost kids company while the whole party fought the boss.
Let's just watch the video, and then go to the comments.
No.
No
nein
:(
What Conner had to say was so nice. I like to listen while I'm working. Makes the whole day just so much better. Thank you r/Slash!!
“He was one of the 2 people in her 30+ year career that she’d ever fired.”
Well at least he achieved something
Not like ya faliures
Achievement unlocked!
Get fired
How can you be late when you literally live in the office?
Maybe he was watching @rSlash all night because of how ADDICTIVE this channel is?
Okay so my friend got some dnd stuff and we started playing dnd with some of our friends (it was all of our first times). So when I was making my character, I decided to base it on Ron Swanson which ended me up with -1 charisma. So my friend was the dm and she said that if I seduced enough stuff she would increase my charisma. Que me attempting to seduce literally everything. One time I rolled a nat20 and seduced a door.
In a game I was in once, my barbarian found a halberd. After getting it, she kept rolling 20s, critting, even one-shotting anything that got near her. The wizard in the group wanted to check out what the halberd was exactly but my barbarian didn't care since it kept her killing up and refused to let the wizard near her. Good thing she did, as when she passed due to her curse, the wizard finally identified the halberd. It was enchanted to be uber powerful as long as you didn't know what was making you so powerful (I forget the exact wording of this part) so it lost all power after the wizard did this. The rest of the party was pissed at the wizard for not only ruining the greatest item ever but disrespecting my barbarian after her death. They ended up burying the halberd with her so that was super nice.
When I DMed a few rounds (the normal DM put me in charge when his wife gave birth), I did something similair to rSlash and the box. Though mine was trapped boxes. The wizard (same guy too) kept telling them not to touch the boxes but they wouldn't listen. They were so injured all the time. They did get something like a pet Mimic in the end though. It was a living box that could store anything and everything safely with no limit but it had a mind of its own and kept wandering off with all their shit inside.
Some lady who worked for my mom lived in the office for like a week, my mom was so shocked that she had to *tell* her subordinates that they can’t live at work
For a coworker I have 2.
One who had their desk full of pictures and one of those doll heads you can brush. The pictures were serial killers and the doll head looked like it had been tortured and probably raped. He got fired for stalking staff and customers.
The second one was a guy aged 45-50 who talked to a 16 year old customer and then wrote down their details and sent them pictures of otters. He was fired for stalking.
Both got jail time from it too.
Heck yeah Conner! Congrats on your first marathon! Way to go RSLASH for being his motivation! ❤️
The comment about create water reminded me of my favorite "exploit" with magical items: the Arrowhead of Total Destruction (not my original idea). For those who don't know it's an arrowhead with the arrowhead replaced by an open bag of holding and a tube suspended above it at the "tip" by some metal frames a thin wooden retaining rod. The tube contains a rolled-up portable hole. When fired, the wooden rod breaks and the tube/portable hole tip is pushed into the bag of holding, creating a rift to the astral plane and destroying everything in a 10-foot radius.
Used it once. DM never gave us a portable hole again.
Dude second my boss boss dumps trash on my desk I would have said “I quit, looking at the garbage, oh wait I didn’t realize I was looking at the garbage and not you”
I absolutely love getting to listen to these while driving to work don't change your upload schedule it's perfect
Alright, but that "He couldn't keep his shit to himself" joke was pretty good
when rslash swears we know something good may've happened
“Couldn’t keep that shit to himself” made me laugh too much!
Your channel is basically reddit in audiobook format and I love it!!!!!
"So... Daniel literally couldn't keep that shit to himself?" 🤣🤣🤣
Worst Co-worker, So I was working as a cook at this golf course for Rich folk (6+ years ago) and one day we get this new hire, Paul. You see, Paul's parents were members and got their just graduated high school son a job as a dish washer in our kitchen. You would think one person washing dishes for 5 hours couldn't cause so many problems on their first day, but some how this weakest link was like cancer to the entire kitchen. Never had I seen such chaos in the kitchen all because he wouldn't stay focus on HIS ONE JOB. He wasn't even working alone as a dish washer and yet the back up he caused was greater than any Winter Holiday event or New Years that I had worked. During just a LUNCH RUSH on a June Saturday he broke plates and glasses, dropped every 5th utensil handed to him on the floor, was told to dry something and would just put it down still wet, kept trying to walk away from his station, and started arguments with every male employee who raised their voice to him. Yet the cherry on top of this bad day. Paul just got a new Iphone a few days before starting and forgot his charger at home. Not wanting to drive home with an low battery, Paul decided to follow the advice on a rumor he heard and put his brand new Iphone in our kitchen's microwave. Thats right, Paul thought that if you put your Iphone in the microwave for 1 minute it would be fully charged. You would think a person couldn't be that dumb, but then I saw the sparks coming from our microwave. Long story short, Paul was fired on his first of work (Officially the day after) and we had to get a new microwave. His official reason for being fired: "For causing chaos in the work place".
I cant even pinpoint the worst coworker I ever had haha. I had one that pretty much everyday had some story about something rude she'd done and got me thrown under the bus a lot but I don't remember more than a handful of experiences. A coworker who treated me like crap for weeks then managed to get my 2 bosses and herself in on a cornered scream session that made me cry, she convinced them I had been rude so she got to scream at me for HER behavior. Or the special little darling studying to be a dietitian who didn't believe ANYONE that i was 9 months pregnant. She was so convinced I was just very fat she slacked off in her job so Id have to pick up her slack saying "I could use the exercise", keep in mind because of her I was 9 months pregnant as a shift lead in a hospital, and pulled double shifts because of her calling out last minute. That was her answer even for that... exercise I desperately needed. She even had her friends harass me all hours of the day (she stole my number from the employee call log), about dieting techniques I should immediately get on because my weight was unhealthy and unbecoming. Only reason she's not the worst was the other 2 I worked with for 3 years, she only stayed 5 months and was gone when my maternity leave was over. Screw them all 🤷♀️
Congrats Connor!!
This one was so funny. Loved it.
Keep up your awesome work Rslash. 😁😁
I know a guy with Asperger's and he takes over every conversation whether he was in it or not. He will walk up to random people talking about something else and just start talking about what's going on in his life. People will skillfully end his conversation or steer away from it and the next time there is even the slightest lull in talking he will start up again as if the subject never changed. Sometimes if people are talking too much for him to get a word in (often intentionally) he will just start talking over them about his stuff. He will randomly tell strangers what he plans to make for dinner.
Worst coworker was my second bakery manager when I worked at Walmart. Honestly, the department ran better WITHOUT them (we had to wait about 4 months for them to transfer to our store). For their first 6 months, not a single person in bakery OR deli could figure out what they did for 8 hours a day, aside from moving table around (which were always moved back to their original position by my next shift). They also tried to get everyone else to do their job; including ordering people from produce or deli to do things. One time, I was called in by an assistant manager on my day off to do cake decorating. I clarified to the assistant manager that I would ONLY do cakes, as I knew the bakery manager was in. They agreed. Low and behold, as soon as I got in, the bakery manager tried to tell me to do something else. I said no, was called in only to do cakes. They ran to a DIFFERENT assistant manager, who tried to tell me I had to listen to bakery manager. Told assistant manager that the other assistant manager had agreed to me doing only cakes, as that was what they needed. Didn't say anything else to me. Think that was the point bakery manager started hating me, because I didn't bend to their "power". Zero respect for this person. That was the only coworker I WASN'T sad to say goodbye too when I left only a few months later
RSlash is so refreshing tbh. Every channel that reads Reddit stories or memes uses the same British tts voice and its obnoxious. Good stuff for continuing to read it yourself, it's actually the most effort you can put into these videos. Your voice is really nice tbh, and it seriously makes a huge difference
omg I LOVE the D&D stories!
My favorites: coconut weapon, training lock, and your kobold in a box story.
y'all can't imagine the joy i just experienced from hearing rSlash read d&d related posts
My worst coworker was a shipmate in the Navy. He didn't shower. He didn't wash his clothes. He was sent the kitchens to fulfill the food service attendant requirement. The Culinary Specialists quickly found out that he wasn't fit to work with food. He was sent the the trash room then he just lived with the trash instead of clearing it. It got so bad that a 1st class had to watch him shower and wash his clothes
I worked at a marijuana greenhouse for a while just to pay bills. One of my coworkers was this older Mexican lady who didn't really speak English too well. She was stubborn, argumentative, told the bosses off for trying to get her to do stuff, messed up my work, and even tried to get me in trouble after I told her what she was doing wrong.
I went to college in the veterinary technician program, and we would have to come in at 6 AM and 6 PM on scheduled days to take care of the animals. We always knew ahead of time. I still heard stories about idiots who showed up to their 6 AM shift hung over. One of them ended up puking in a litterbox.
Am I the only one that loves how he crops the text and only adds parts when he reads it instead of just using the entire picture from the begging? I have a tendency to read beforehand but with this i can’t and it’s so nice idk why
To live within a box only to forget sounds like a nightmare only to forget it to go back to it. That's so evil but so clever
I once gave a player a necklace with multicolored pearls. Homebrew magic item. Each one had a chance at a negative side effect, but the two most memorable ones were
1) summon a nonmagical animal companion, but because of bad luck the wearer turned into a Vaporeon
2) all spells below lvl 3 cost no spell slots, but all are centered on the user
2nd one is now fondly remembered by the specific player as the "Kamikaze fireball incident"
Two Responses.
I had a "Daniel" at my work, pure dumbass who wore Goth/Heavy Metal clothes that were terribly co-ordinated. He looked like a cartoon.
He'd always be listening to some garbage scream music on the bus (I worked a job where all 60 workes took the same bus every morning from the train station) on his headphones. I know it was scream music because the Headphones either didn't do their job at all or he was listening on max volume because you could hear them on a crowded bus ten feet away.
I saw him go to the bathroom once (we were both in line). He let out a "WHOO!", slapped himself on the back and moonwalked into the booth like... well like an absolute idiot.
Whatever he'd eaten... was loud, even through the door you could hear his grunts, groans and eventual "WHOO-HOOS!" whenever he dropped a deuce.
I decided it was safer for my mental health to hold it in and went to a further away toilet.
As for the dumbest item a DM gave me it was a bottle of Infinite Alcohol for my Dwarven Drunken Fist Monk. The bottle would pour whatever drink I wanted and not stop until told so.
So the second we came to a cave I slowly but surely spent three days flooding the Goblin's Nest with Vodka before tossing a Torch inside.
The DM was not amused and my Bottle was nerfed to 1d6 Liters per day, to be rolled each morning.
So then I just started bottling the most expensive alcohol my Character knew off and used it to buy cheaper Alcohols he preferred. Rolled high on the History check so I knew of a rare Alcohol worth 5 Gold per Litre
I'm a nursing assistant, and I worked with another trained licenced nursing assistant that literally asked me how to give someone a shower. My explanation was "the same way you take a shower. Except you have to help them get their clothing off and wash parts they can't reach.". And she said "okay. How do I do that?" Face, meet palm.
yaaaas D&D!! I gave my players a bag of devouring, and a special magical golden apple that would turn it into a functional bag of holding/trash bag, but the kobold player decided to cut it in half and give one to the bag and eat the rest 😂 needless to say he has now turned himself into semi functional dual bag of holding with a 10% chance to devour.
I couldn't stop laughing that one forgetting that there in a box but will forget in seconds
Worst co-worker I ever had was definitely an absolute looper I had on my crew while working on a passenger ferry.
She was brought on with the seasonal intake and I helped train her group. From day one we knew she was going to cause problems. She wasn't stupid as the theory "classroom" stuff she picked up quite quick and had no trouble remembering. It was the actual physical sea survival training she had issue with. That's when all sorts of ailments came up. After a simple "you don't pass, you have no job and you don't prove you can do this part then you don't pass" she managed to barely scrape by.
Barely 4 weeks into the season this looper faked breathing difficulties to the extent an emergency airlift had to be requested while at sea. We had 3 passengers, 1 doctor and 2 nurses look at her not 100% convinced it was real but because they couldn't guarantee she was in fact faking the call had to be made. I was one of 3 crew on that day that had been trained for airlift so I had to go with her. Even though looper was crew a member of crew still has to go with the casualty. On a plus side, airlift at sea onto a Sea King?! Sign me up! Airlift from a passenger ferry with 600 passengers onbaord is not to be taken lightly though. In short it's bloody dangerous.
When we landed there was an ambulance waiting to rush her to hospital. I had to call a taxi to follow. Taxi took about 25mins to show up and it was another 10min drive to the hospital. By the time I got to the hospital looper had already been looked over and had ficken made a run for it when they found nothing wrong with her at all! Police caught up with her a few days later after a complaint was made by the Ferry operator and HM Coastgaurd.
The airlift itself caused a 45min delay to the sailing as the ship had to change course and sail away from where we were meant to be heading so the helicopter could make it's lift. 600+ passengers now 45mins late. To top it off it was a full load booked back out and because the ship was now down 2 crew they couldn't leave until cover could be found so add ANOTHER hour and a half delay to the next group of 750 passengers! Also consider that crew had yet ANOTHER trip to make before end of shift those delays fickne hurt... all because Looper didn't like working in the Brasserie and the best way out of work is "Breathing difficulties" of course.
My own dnd story. I was a party member, not the DM.
So we had a ranger on our team who quickly earned the nickname "pothead". Not for drug usage, but because he literally wore a metal pot as a hat 24/7. However this was a magic pot, (none of us knew where it came from cause he had it before he joined the party) and anything put in the pot would never fall out, even if the pot was completely upside down. So he didn't just have a pot on his head, he had *a pot of soup* on his head.
It gets better though. After every battle Pothead would add some kind of enemy remains (like scales, eyes, fingers, fur ect.) To the pot and it progressively got grosser and grosser. Around level 5 we had a tough battle coming up and our rogue (one of the 2 team leaders) got the idea to try dipping some of his crossbow bolts in the soup.
They dealt bonus poison damage. After that we all started dipping blades and arrows/bolts in the soup before any anticipated encounters.