Because as you grow you start to give more importance to your community and so start to do things that are seen as good, even if they have no sense in it. If you would have been raised in a society where the norm is eating with your hands, that's what you would have looking forward to learn
AGREED. So tired of children getting up and down and taking food out to the other room and making a mess. And the adults with your phone either on the table in their lap or in their hand while they're trying to talk to you simultaneously with the Snapchat Facebook whatever. Don't forget the kids going mom mom mom mom mom mom mom mom mom all trying to have a grown-up civilized discussion. I miss the calm have a dinner, tidy up the dishes, let's have dessert all together, big dining room table meals.
If you happen to have allergies but did not give the host sufficient time. Then make sure you bring your epinephrine with you, as it is impolite to die on the table.
I came from the ghetto and I'm really trying to change. This is competily opposite of how i was raised but i love it so much thank you for helping me you guys are amazing
So...my dad taught me well. 99% of what you showed here is what I learned from my father. I was raised in Japan and U.S. I am blessed to have appreciation for both culture. Thank you!
I grew up in a working class family and when having holiday dinners at my grandparents we always had multiple courses with stacked plates, many utensils, napkin etc. I learned where the napkin went and general good table manners at a young age and I appreciate it more now as i've gotten older. This isn't a luxurious or wealthy class thing at all, we were not wealthy. This is plain and simple good table manners.
BLTspace On a rather ironic note, class is classless, you can have millionaires like Cardi B or middle class family with enough education and class to pass traditions and etiquette to younger generations.
I think this very much depends on the country. In most european countries, this would be seen as quiet weird. Here, you lay the napkin next to your plate and put the knife and the fork on top of it.
@@jeffmyersmusic Not so. I like a lot more salt than everyone else that I've ever met. So if the host seasons the meal 'correctly', ie. to most people's taste, then I KNOW that I will need more salt so I don't need to try it to find out.
In some countries passing the salt from hand to hand as shown here is bad luck, you are supposed to pass it but sit it on the table for her/him to reach it.
Thank you for a great video! As a blind person, I greatly appreciate all the detailed descriptions. I even got to find out how you were dressed. Beautiful! You almost never see that anymore.
A few years ago I went for a trip on the Canberra cruise liner (age 14), all the meals were formal. I was initially quite concerned that there may be something I was unaware of at meal times. Seems that my parents had trained me up to the required standards when I was a kid, and nothing cropped up that was unexpected. Correct table manners are something that people should learn as kids.
Very commanding, unfortunately today's parents teaching their children total ignorance toward personal culture. The general believes are the bigger Baboon you are the better chance to survive in the jungle of life. VARY SAD!!!
My wife has a wonderful mother. I'm lucky there. When she was a teenager she scolded her over her table manners. She said you will meet a man who will not like your table manners and be embarrassed. She was correct. I had to teach her proper table manners. The funny part is I'm a dirtbag scaffolder. Thankfully I have a great mom who like your parents taught me etiquette. As an adult I now own a scaffold mob and manners are again important. I'll teach my little ones the same. Even a blue collar man can be a gentleman when he needs to be.
This is about the first time I've actually felt I was watching a "how to behave" video on TH-cam that was genuinely useful, not condescending, and looks so classy it was inspiring. As well as being a little bit light-hearted. Yes, table manners make OTHER PEOPLE feel comfortable. You know, all those people who aren't you? And this gentleman deserves the Nobel Prize, a Guggenheim Fellowship and a Canada Council Grant for #1: TURN OFF your cell phone and put it away. The cell phone has done more to ruin people's manners than the egg salad sandwich, and that's saying a lot. Brilliance.
The best story I heard on this was about Prince Albert, the consort to Queen Victoria. In the old days there would be a glass tumbler on the table to wash your fingers in. At a social gathering a working class man mistakenly drank it. Prince Albert immediately drank his, and so every other person at the table was obliged to drink theirs. Now that is true manners. It's not about ostracising people, it's about making them feel comfortable.
Patrick I certainly respect the spirit of the guests. But where do you draw the line when it comes to making the mistake memorable? I'm sure he felt mortified afterward. He probably hoped people would just let it go, but here we stand we in 2018. Lol
Perfectly true That is why i was embarrassed when President Obama made a mistake on following his speech he asked the guests to rise and salut the queen by sipping champagne. He forget the anthem . In my view her majesty should have done like Albert. She made the President look foolish.
@nunya inct How dare you, the former president had plenty of class. Everyone makes mistakes, that's no reason to label someone classless. Especially not someone who in such a high seat of power must've attended numerous formal events himself.
This is amazing. I finally feel like table manners are not about being rich or snobbish, just about making everyone else feel respected and comfortable.
I am a father of 3, and I find this channel/videos fascinating. My daughters (13 & 10) can set & serve traditional dinners properly, while my son (17) can cut his food without looking silly & pick out the intricate details of a bespoke suit! It's required viewing in my home! So many children lack even the most basic of daily etiquette. I'm thrilled I found this channel!
You just summarized my childhood in less than 20 minutes. My parents were very strict with manners, and now as an adult they come naturally to me. The only conflict I had growing up was that my parents divorced early on: my Dad had (and expected) Continental manners, while my Mom had (and expected) American manners. So if I mixed them up and used the "wrong" manners with either of them, I would get into serious trouble. Thank you for sharing this important knowledge with others!
Growing up as a kid, our mother made us listen to her excerpts from the "Good Book of Manners" every other meal. What we thought was boring and repetitive, payed dividends throughout my life. Thanks for bringing class back into a classless society. Excellent video!
@@tree427 there is Social Class and Classy Behaviour. He's referring to the latter. Classy Behaviour is not dependent on your social class. You could be a multimillionaire from an historic wealthy family or a poor builder. Both can behave with class or uncultured. My grandad never went to high school. He started working on building sites aged 12. He never, and I mean never, went out socially in tracksuits. Both he and my grandmother always dressed nicely, he wore suits with ties and vneck jumpers and treated everyone with respect. As a result they were both very well respected despite being immigrants in Britain in the 50s.
@@tree427 'Class' has nothing to do with 'rank', as in the British society of royals, aristocrats, landowners, workers, servants, etc. Some of the most classy people I know are of what some might consider 'lower rank'. I've seen (and so have you, if you watched our former president with the Queen of England) filthy rich people behave like utter slobs with no class whatsoever. The idea is to be polite, kind and not make others feel inferior based on their income or lack thereof. THAT'S what America was all about when it was founded.
After this pandemic ends Imma be a perfect gentleman. Hello, looks like it has been 2 months! And I feel like a true gentleman man. Between the 2 months I have married 4 times (not fexing ) Hello, 5 months after this video I have a wife that would stay now. Hello, 11 moths after this video I have my first son but the pandemic isn't over.
@@R00T.VVreced It never hurts. Considering the feelings of others is a good thing. It shows you love yourself, to be honest. Kindness is a wonderful quality, caring is great, respect for others, human, animals, nature, is a beautiful thing.
My grandparents were very serious regarding etiquette. Bread was always buttered lying flat on the bread plate , never in hand . Soup eaten by drawing away with the spoon , never scooped toward you. No salt or pepper unless offered. Fork left hand always pointed down , index finger MUST rest on top of the knife while cutting, fingers not allowed to wrap around the knife handle..that would show that the food was improperly cooked and hard to cut. Spoon and fork always placed downwards on the plate to signify being finished...only an unused utensil was allowed to point upwards .BTW fork cutting is acceptable for deserts . I always thought it was a useless set of rules , but it stands out greatly when dining formally. You notice that others begin to copy you because it appears you have sort of special ritual knowledge . Appreciate the video.. brings back memories
Your grandparents served as excellent examples. The rules regarding utensils (being pointed up or down) might be particular to your part of the world (For me, I place the fork and knife parallel and pointing toward the centre of the plate from the 4 o'clock position), but the discipline itself is admirable.
@Johnny Appleseed Don't put yourself down. Working men are the salt of the earth. Respect yourself by showing good manners. No man is unworty of refinement.
At one time, this would have been the norm. It's amazing how good etiquette and manners are needing to be taught by a TH-cam video. Very good content, thank you.
Ah, proper etiquette & table manners! A lost art of sorts. As a child of the '60s, these manners were taught & insisted upon by my parents on to my siblings and I. Starting at a young age and practiced in our home during Sunday's main family meals, at holiday meals, in restaurants and any other functions outside our home that included other folks (like certain church & country club functions, anniversary celebrations, wedding receptions etc). They were expected of us, no excuses. It was also expected of us to say "please" and "thank you". My sister & I were sent to "charm school" as soon as we met the age requirement. Boys also went to these etiquette schools. At the time I didn't see the point of all this stuff..but I practiced them growing up and as a parent, I taught my children to do the same. IMO, they are one of most important things we can teach our children. They can make or break another's first impression of you & your character. They make all the difference.
I come from a family (immediate and extended) that took table manners seriously. When you reached a certain age, we would be sent to etiquette school and be expected to join the adults at the adult table. But most of my learning happened by helping set the table. In college and in early adult life, I realized etiquette and manners help me gain certain advantages academically, personally and professionally. It also helped me navigate interactions with people as I always knew what to do and say in all types of situations. If you are an adult now, I think it is worth it to take an etiquette class/charm school or at least read Emily Post books. Class and grace is how people remember you act around them and how you treated them. You gain so much from that, its like having a key that makes your life easier and better. BTW, I would never place my napkin on the table like you showed here when leaving the table. It may signal to servers you are done with your course and might take your food away. Also, fellow diners wouldn’t want to see your used napkin right next to them. I would place my napkin on the chair.
Yes, about the napkin, I was taught to place in the chair as a placeholder. Also, ladies wearing lipstick should fold the napkin in half on her lap so as the smears from mouth wiping are on the interior, hidden from view. 🌹
@@thewindgamer2607 If you’re asking me, I didn’t attend “Manners School”, my grandma taught me. Vogue’s 1948 Book of Etiquette was my manual. She also taught me to make my bed every morning so that no matter what else happened that day you know you have already accomplished something. 🥰 Cali, USA!
Also notice that when someone ask for the bowl with vegtables to be passed, do not serve yourself before passing it on, but ask for the bowl to be returned. Also notice that when you scoop the vegetables into the spoon you do it from the side of the bowl towards the center, that way you avoid scooping food over the edge of the bowl and on to the table. You hold a glass by the stem for two reasons, your hands wont alter the temperature of the wine and the glass loks nice and clean. I was taught never to clink but salute when drinking wine.
This is western etiquette. In Eastern and Middle Eastern countries, the etiquette is at times the opposite..Heck even British and American table etiquette is different and both are western countries.
I am terrible with holding a glass at the stem, but you are completely right. I clink with people next to me if I clink, to the other guests across the table I only lift my glass, nod and smile. That is with friends and family. In a formal setting no clinking just lift glass, nod and smile otherwise your sleeves might get caught, you have to sort of get up halfway, and it all becomes awkward with table decorations or, if there are candles, you set the place on fire.
Great video. Great lesson. I have many times been out with a small group of people for dinner, and those who have never observed any table manners, through poor training or a lack of respect for others, stand out quite starkly. A quick lesson is to try not to offend others around you while you are eating, e.g. making noises while you eat or talking with your mouth full. No one wants to see inside your mouth while you chew your food. I was fortunate to have had a mother who attended an all women's school where etiquette class was mandatory. The three girls and one boy in the family were taught meal etiquette from childhood. With the relaxation of what is socially acceptable at the table, I and my elder sister are the only ones to continue these practices. Even many waiters and waitresses no longer know how to read a table. Thank you.
My dad taught me one of the most important things about etiquette is that it sends a message. Its a type of communication, and the ability to use it in your favor can be extremely beneficial. You don't have to be extremely snobby every time, but instead communicate your thoughts and opinions through it. As a young adult, I have to relearn everything again, because my whole life I've eaten on the sidewalk or in my room, now it's time for me to start a professional life, and thus, learn to behave in formal situations, excelente video.
I'm so glad I found this channel, even though my upbringing and social class don't emphasize these manners I feel inspired to be a gentleman and a better person overall, more kind, more aware of my manners and how I carry myself. Thank you!
I support your growth all the way. My dad had no real example, was raised in the country by his grandmother. He truly was a country gentleman. As his daughter (1 of 3) I felt his strong gentle presence at all times. I never heard a bad word. He was respected and liked by all. He would tell his grandsons "A real man takes his coffee black and keeps his shoes polished". You will stand out, but in a very good way. As a mom of a 25 year old son, good for you.
@@saraG100 inspiring, thanks for sharing. I've recently turned 28 :) some things must be adaptated to the Brazilian context - hard to wear a suit in the hot summer! - but most tips I've found here are universal. That's the point I guess.
My dad also had his grandsons read a book called "How to win Friends and Influence People " by Dale Carnegie. It's quite old but as he made me read it too I can say the ideas are timeless and classy. Easy quick read. Kept thinking I should suggest it to you.
Awesome!!!!! I learned a lot of this when I was in an exchange program to Germany. I knew done table manners before, but this brought back a ton of memories and I don’t accept less. Anytime I’m out or at someone’s home.. they always notice my table manners and are impressed. I love a formal table setting since we were too poor to have this. Wonderful video.. much appreciation. New subbie from Tampa Florida 🌴
As a low-level peasant (!) this is not a world into which I would expect to be invited, but it was perhaps the most delightful and interesting video I've seen in a long time. What a smile you have. The personification of charm. Thank you.
You can do it anywhere. You don’t have to be in a place with wooden panels and a crested tapestry the napkin, the mouth open, the elbows, the knife, the chair, etc
My mother raised me with these rules and I was always so annoyed at the time. Now I am greatful it is automatically ingrained and I am continuing to educate myself further and refresh my memory on them!
I live with people who pride themselves on bad manners. Watching this is like a breath of fresh air. If I try to use good manners I am made fun of. Civilized people is not a phrase I live with but this was a delight to watch.
Excellent video. Missed one point: before drinking, use your napkin to wipe your mouth. Nothing worse than some sort of sauce left on your glass! My mother was from a large poor family who practiced, well, let's say, very informal customs. She made a point to learn from others. In our home she always set a fine table, and set it beautifully, and we grew up practicing proper etiquette on a daily basis. Eating is one of the sensuous pleasures of life -- make the most of it!
you are not supposed to wipe your mouth with a napkin because when you eat properly and with manners there be no sauce or any food stuffs to wipe away. but it sometimes happens that you will need to wipe you mouth because...and use the napkin(lol i need 10 napkins eating burritos)
When I grew up in the 60's and 70's even poor families or lower middle class families taught their children manners for how to behave at other people's homes and how to be polite at the table, how to speak to your friends parents. I don't see this much any more.
I enjoy this channel. I grew up in the hotel industry. Many of my father’s employees and supervisors were European. We dressed for dinner, we used etiquette, and behaved in manners differently than today. It was a good life! 😊
As a teenager, I always hated being forced to follow table manners. I assumed table manners were for the pretentious and arrogant. Table manners is just a kill joy. But as I have grown older, I realize it just comes down to respect. A real gentleman comes down to respecting others, no matter what may be the difference. This video has some great information on doing just that. Thanks for the tips.
Kurtanius21 it just shows so much control and finesse. I'm from a poor family, poor friends, poor schooling, poor neighbourhood but expensive University education. By the time I got to university I was so unrefined that every interaction was somewhat embarrassing, which says a lot since University students aren't exactly refined. Now I'm the most refined and respectable person among all of my friends. I used to slur my words as well. Now I am dripping finesse left, right and centre.
I come from a blue collar/labor, African-American Family. My parents were from rural Texas and Arkansas; who migrated to California to live, work and raise a family of 5 children. It was required to learn and use any and all table manners that were available to us. Of course we didn't have 3 different forks to use during our meals, but we had to learn to use our manners every time we sat down to eat any where and with anyone! My mother and my father taught us. My mother had beautiful China and Silver that we used only on special occasions and holidays. I am an only girl among 4 brothers. I thank God for parents who instructed us in correct, proper dining habits so that...as my father would say...."So you can dine with good manners and class from Watts to Beverly Hills."
When we were chidren, we learned all of these rules. And we still use them today. Two things that spoil dining out - when everyone is texting and when folks bring their screaming children and let them do as they please.
@@mdrahman6732 to begin - START INVESTING EARLY! Save and invest as much as you can. You can never substitute for what is called compounded interest. Look it up. And never live above your means.
@Mr. Sir I don't mind what people think about me in a lot of things, but for just simple common sense things I care about other peoples feelings. For example I almost went crazy when I heard the chomping in this video. I can't control it, it's like a phobia and it makes me feel so uncomfortable and lose my appetite. Similarly if my friend or anyone is easily disgusted by say a dirty napkin on the table, I would do my best not to make another person feel that way because I know it can feel terrible. (it depends on how well you know the person/people honestly)
@@DrRobertMPick awwe you replied to the 16 yo, that made me so happy for some reason xD. And I agree with that tip about not living above your means, I've learned from my mistakes huhuhu .
At my elementary school, in 4th grade we did a “Manner’s Luncheon.” We spent time learning table manners before hand. Then one day, we had a “fancy” lunch in the cafeteria. We dressed up and boys sat the girls down, etc. It was really fun and informative. I learned more about manner’s from West Point and the military, where it is expected that a military officer acts genteel.
@jackieporter5323 :: jackie, give him a break, why don't ya ? First off :: He used quotation marks around "Manner's Luncheon" which means someone else probably effed-up. Second off (?) :: Is it his "English" that needs "lessons" or his possessive case usage ? _[ Oh, what a tangled web we weave when jumpin' on someone else ! ]_
@@jackieporter5323 :: OOPS !! My bad ‼️ I just read his last sentence where he does use an apostrophe in "manners". _[ Oh, what a strangling web I weaved when not minding my own business ‼️ ]_ Please be gracious enough to accept my apologies (?)
I’m here because I’m learning this in school...I’ve been eating like this every night for a week, my parents look at me like I’m crazy as I take 2 hours to eat
I’m not afraid to admit it is my girlfriend know this a couple things and bad habits that I had that I didn’t even realize this video is very helpful to the point where I saved it in my personal notes. This video has been very helpful.
"If you ever have to leave the table, make sure it's for a maximum of 5 minutes, otherwise it's very impolite and rude" Apparently, nobody at Brazzers is aware of this
So my friends pointed out that they are not usually comfortable when eating with me in any restaurant setting because I follow almost all of these instructions. I was really taught to eat that way ever since I was a kid, and i never noticed that I do. But apparently following such behavior made them thing that I might judge them if they do not xD
It sounds like their more self conscious about their own lack of table manners then this being your issue. Personally I somehow managed to absorb continental table manners at some point even though I grew up with the 'switching' American way. I also tend to eat quite quickly.
best way to defuse that situation is to follow the etiquette rules to a 'T' but then letting rip a smelly loud one, your co-diners will feel so much more at ease 👍
My eating companions tell me that I always eat all of my veggies first, all of my starches next and then my meat; and that I rarely drink during the meal. I didn’t realize this but I remember growing up I had a small appetite and this was how my mom taught me to eat. Good job, mom!
As an individual, I highly value the significance of learning about proper etiquette including table etiquette, and I will continue to increase my general knowledge of proper etiquette as I grow older. Likewise, I ought to acquaint myself with the rules and customs of proper etiquette that are established in every country on Earth. Thank you sincerely for posting this video!
He made the mistake of emptying a bottle of red wine; even when there's no sediment a little should remain at the bottom. (It also provides an acceptable counter balance when you throw it over your shoulder to the butler.)
Barry A. I also prefer continental. There are some things I'm not sure of, like when you finish eating is the knife on the outside or inside? Also is the fork facing up or down. I tend towards down. I heard that was a more British style of doing things.
Beautiful etiquette 101 presentation. I'm impressed that you addresed the cellphone and to put it away. I like how you address some differences in different countries
Right even if this is not your style you can still learn to be neat. I have seen men who only wear jeans but they are always clean, neatly pressed, belt, nice shirt and clean shoes. I think like you said it is the grooming not so much it has to be a suit. I miss that about men now a days. They are disheveled looking now.
My mother taught my brother and me table manners since we were kids. And it's always good to refresh the knowledge. Sometimes we keep practicing the basics but forget other things (for example, I just noticed I need to refine my manners regarding hte use of my phone). Thank you for this video and for creating this channel. I'm subscriber from now on.
Phones in my parents house have always been a BIG no no. You would NEVER touch you phone while on the table. Unless it rang and you needed to reject the call and put it on silent, and excuse yourself for it.
I'm American and I always got chastised for the continental method with the upside down fork.. even though this is the most efficient way!! I wish this video had been around during my childhood.
I think the presenter is making the point that efficency is not the sole issue when eating in public. On that basis, one could just pick up the plate and shovel the food off it. Hmm. Could be worth a try, mind you.
Take small bites so you can quickly swallow and respond to questions if asked. I am in the US and was taught to never butter the entire piece of bread at once, and always break off a piece, butter it, put down your knife, then pop the small piece of bread in your mouth. I was also taught that in the US you don't hold your knife in your hand while eating (in the continental style), because it looks aggressive, makes you eat faster, you might accidentally gesture with your knife holding hand, and you can't put your hand in your lap (American style) if you are holding a knife! You are so right, being gracious and forgiving is the best table manner of all.
As a waiter, I wish more people ate like this. It's always nice to see when someone stacks their plates for me to clear up, or even better, they put it all on a tray. It's a simple thing but it can make someone's day a little more fun. Also doing stuff like putting cutlery in the done position, as it means I can clearly tell that you're done and I should clear your table next. How was i never aware that stacking plates is seen as rude. Maybe it's not a thing in Ireland or maybe it's just because i work at a 3 star hotel and it's a much more casual enviroment.
Wait, DO stack the plates? I used to stack plates all the time, neatly, because it just seemed helpful and like an easier way for the wait staff to grab them. Then I kept reading that you should NOT do this. Something about concern that perhaps I would stack things improperly. So I stopped. Now I don't know what to do. Just trying to make life easier for servers!
@@andrewkelly6828 depends on how you stack them. To me, the fact that you even tried is a good thing. Even if it's stacked poorly, it still makes it easier. There's these 2 guys that come in every day and eat like pigs. They leave sugar packets all over the table, plates and bowls all around, spilled tea and coffee, EVERYTHING. Cleaning that table is horrible. But even just stacking a few plates or putting the cutlery together helps.
@@bigmanmccheez5342 it's not elegant and can be awkward. Removal of plates is for the server to do. The diners are to focus on each other. Now if it's a really casual restaurant then its not a problem.
A good habit is to blot your lips before you drink from your glass as the French do .That way the glass will be free of smudges and the glass will not loose its sparkle ! It is refined, lol. When interrupting your eating in order to speak, do not point your utensils upwards , keep them close to your plate ,, pointing down . Do not bring your face to the fork, rather bring the fork to your mouth , so you are able to sit straight in your chair , rather then bending down .I learned all that as a little girl from my German father . We actually had to put books under the arms and hold them there, until we were used to keeping the arms close to the sides of the body . I am very grateful to my father for taking the time to teach us good table manners , it is a blessing and I feel comfortable dining among dignitaries , lol.
I found this video EXTREMELY amusing. Not at all because of the content, just the opposite. It showed me how I have been a complete slob almost always acting along with the "don'ts." Most people around here don't even know what table manners are. Now that I have learned, I feel much more self confident. I can practice, even if my peers don't notice. Thank you greatly for your help.
@Robert Walker I was a stay at home mom, therefore my theory has been that there was no one at home to teach their kids the proper way to do things, such as eat.
Serbia as well - I really don't like it. I am always at a place right on time, in minute. If I see that I'll arrive sooner than I should, I slow down, take a detour. If I happen to be late, even for a minute or two, I make sure that people know it. And anything more than 5 minute delay is simply unacceptable unless there was some unforeseen event, like a car accident on a bridge and you are stuck in traffic. As herr Flick would say "Do not be late. Do not be early. Be PUNCTUAL!" :)
Hello Mr. Schneider, you just uploaded a very nice video. I remember the first time i went out for a formal lunch with some important people. I have been raised in a middle class family and barely had the opportunity to go out and eat at upper class restaurants. I was a bit nervous so i chose the "go slow, watch and then do" strategy. I would watch the other men and copy their actions. It helped and gradually it became a habit. I am a businessman and i believe it's very important to maintain a good image of yourself when you go out and eat (does not matter if it's formal or informal). Manners maketh man. Thanks for uploading Mr. Schneider!
Karan Vito Same here! You can usually get through these kind of situations without embarrassing yourself, if you pay attention and let others take the lead. Which you should, when you’re a ‚novice‘ anyway. I did do the ‚drinking when toasted to’ thing though, so ‚ups‘ on that.
I grew up in a family where table manners were greatly encouraged. I was very young when I was taught how to eat with the different utensils. Even in our country house we taught to eat properly. I’m very grateful for this education as I have had many opportunities to practice it in my life. Thank you for your lesson.
Well, in Moroccan culture we have: - a table - 1 plate in the middle - 1 big bread - 20 fingers to eat from the same plate And it works .. it's easy peasy lol
A good way to keep conversation going is the Dale Carnegie method of getting people to talk about themselves, which everyone loves to do. A good open-ended question is "how did you come to...?" about a career or other important choice. You will become known as a good conversationalist without speaking much.
After watching this I realized that all those times that I got invited to "informal" diners after work or during lunch time, I eat like a barbaric Viking in the Dark Ages
@@GuruRasaVonWerder The problem with me is that when my friends are the ones don't pay attention to table manners, it feels awkward to eat like what this video shows me. Besides, eating with hands is the most normal way to eat in my country (Indonesia), it's not bad manners as long as you don't chew out loud or with your mouth open. It's also fine as long as you don't get messy and clean your plates, though I always eat rice with spoon
This is so helpful. I always wonder if I am taking food pieces that are too large, because I always have to make people wait for a a few seconds, before I can answer their questions.
I really appreciate these manners; my dad made sure to teach them to me, as he had learned them from our great aunt. I suppose our family took a lot of pride in table etiquette. I found out it was due to one of our relatives being a former teacher on the Spanish royal court. The last reminder is the best; it's simply rude to chastise and criticize guests or hosts especially at an informal affair. It's great to show off skills, but not at the expense of others esteem and comfort. The point of etiquette is to create a comfortable and fun atmosphere.
Terrific presentation - refined, humorous, and really practical. This is information that could help somebody make money, forge lasting connections, and be invited back - I plan to share this and other videos of yours with several people in my life. I want to really listen and pay attention will be the ones who will be successful. Thank you VERY much!
I was born in early '70 and those were the tables manners my mother insisted upon. Both she and my grand mother were teachers . I taught those to my children who were always perceived as very courteous and polite by their teachers...
I note the word "teach" in your comment. Today, parents seem afraid to teach their children. A lost responsibility of being a parent, now that everyone is addicted to iPhones and themselves.
Those were the days when America was America, Who - in all fairness cares today what the teacher's perception of about anything for that matter. How is their behavior?
This man's smile just brings me so much joy. You sir, have earned yourself a new sub. Now thanks to you, I could use these methods when I meet my crushes parents. That is if they serve food.
Believe me in today's world no one cares about this and if you do have a potential boss to whom this matters, then he or she is going to be too nitpicky to work with in the first place.
@@GuruRasaVonWerder To each their own. "Ambience at meals" is usually not something I am concerned with having. To me, eating is something I have to do to stay alive. I mean, that is to say, that I am not a pig with no table manners and I am concerned with the comfort of others, but I can truthfully say that unless a person is loud or has their cell phone on and is using it at the dinner table, not much upsets me when I eat with others.
I love your channel, I'm from the middle class and it is really helpful to learn good manners and subtle stuff I would never have learned otherwise. Thanks a lot.
These tips of dining etiquette bring back fond memories of my father. Even though he was a front line combat military officer, he always insisted upon correct manners at the table. Some additional rules which we had to obey were never coming to the table without washing our hands and face. In addition, elbows were never allowed to touch the table. I can not stress how helpful good manners have influenced my life and career. Finally, I wish you would comment on us lefties. We sometimes make a faux pax while negotiating the right hand world of table etiquette.
Another thing: (at least in Italy, where I live) it’s considered truly impolite to whisper to your table neighbor. It simply shows you have some secrets that might be unpleasant to the other guests or that you are willing to exclude others from your conversation. So if you have to say something to someone it’s preferred to say it to everyone or to privately tell the interested ones later after the meal. I remember sitting at a formal lunch and some guests whispering to each other ignoring the host’s conversation or questions. These people made the host very angry. Not a surprise they didn’t get an invitation from that host anymore.
In the United States you will find yourself more in a setting where with larger venues at a larger table, multiple conversations regarding smaller amounts of people occur.
Hola, en mi caso depende de la cantidad de gente, yo vivo en México y en mi casa en la cena de Navidad somos muchas personas en una mesa larga así que puedes conversar con las personas más cercanas. Por otra parte cuando comemos pocas personas mantenemos una única conversación y personalmente me parecen de mala educación los susurros y cuchicheos.
Liam It’s considered impolite everywhere I would think. I know a couple who have a habit of whispering to each other in company (not just at the table). My husband and I find it very rude. Unfortunately, they’re relatives so we just put up with it and think they’re rude and childish.
Political Status Yes but it’s obvious in an intimate setting when people are whispering. In a large venue it can get noisy so people often have to move closer to talk and other people st the table can’t hear. That’s different. Perfectly understandable.
Ooooooooo that napkin goes on ur lap??? I thought you're supposed wipe the plate with it several times before the meal... Now I know why I didn't get that job. Thank u man.
No, you don't wipe the plate with your napkin. You lick it clean and thus show appreciation to your hostess for her fine fare. You really don't need a napkin if you are wearing socks.
Great video. My grandfather lived in Communist Poland as a dirt farmer. They were so poor they had dirt floors. He comes from the upper class before the Communist came, stripping them of all his wealth. They could beat everything out of him but they could not take the gentleman out of him. He taught us all as his grandkids to eat this way. It always looks good it doesn't matter how poor you are. It does set your stage in society. Even now you can see from photos or hes at the table that he was a gentleman by the way he held himself. I watch these to remind myself so that in the future when they see my photos they will look at me the same way. We are not bums and broads where are ladies and gentlemen. Great video I'm going to direct my kids here.
Eating habits are a dead giveaway when you meet people who got educated under a communist system. Marx declared social and table manners a fallacy of the rich. Don't be surprised when they reach out with their fingers for anything on the table. Break off parts, and return the rest "for the community". And of course, always clean fingers - they lick them while they help themselves. No - these are not snobs - but people you talk about culture, music, art, Opera, in between reach out for olives or nuts without using utensils.
👍🏻 my parents come from Czechoslovakia and I was taught most of this by the harsh hand of my father, and if I ever got it wrong he never failed to use said hand to make me realize that mistake. I had proper table manners all my life and whenever we went on a cruise and ate at the Captain’s dinner I always was shocked at the horrible manners of most Americans. I had fun pretending that we were wealthy and seeing how “proper” I could be at dinner. We always were complimented, which was nice since I was a middle-class kid, though in the 80’s we were in better times. Love the video!
My gran is Russian and worked at a weaving factory. The manners at her birthday dinners came down to "no refusal to try something when asked" (rarely followed), "no raws" (mostly my mom's invention) and "no slurping". She lives in a small apartment and doesn't have a dining table and nearly enough chairs for all the guests. She used two small foldable tables, a sofa, stools and a small kickstand for herself.
As an officer, in the officers mess, etiquet is always observed. And when I was in, most of us looked forward to a civilised meal, especially if there were ladies in attendance. Being an officer and a gentleman are afterall a longstanding tradition in most military units around the world. Especially when serving in their country. Knowing what to do and what to say is afterall, diplomatic. It goes a long way to creating friendships, partnerships and a guaranteed invitation to the next event. Knowing and understanding different cultures, I believe, is vital to forming friendly and valued conversation. Born, raised and educated in South Africa (any South African, born in my era, can speak a minimum of two languages proficiently) and coming from a Portuguese family. I was brought up to observe, respect and learn as much as possible from those around me (a multitude of cultures and languages) but never to forget where I came from (the family name is what we represent through our words and followed by our actions). Traditionally, a meal eaten in company of others, is an oportunity to learn and create friendships through a common medium such as food :) Great channel . . . I have learnt a lot over the decades and I have not stopped learning, your channel is proof of that. Thank you for further educating us, fantastic presentation.
A helpful refresher. I'm guilty of putting my elbows on the table and eating too fast. My Mom taught us these manners and I think they covered them in school, too. But with years of a rougher sort of lifestyle, I forgot some of them. A couple of times I've felt awkward when eating with people who remained more refined. Now I'll be more careful!
Thank you for this well done video. I was raised this way, but lost some of my grace, especially living here in California. I'm re-learning my manners on many different levels, so I thank you, Gentleman's Gazette
I'm surprised by some of the pushback. My parents were of Scottish working class origin, were raised in tenements, and were nonetheless raised with all these habits. I'll bet they were hungrier growing up in the late 40s than most Americans are ever going to be unless actually desperately poor. They ended up with high-school education and would be considered upper-working class where they came from or, in North America, 'lower middle class', and taught me most or all of this as if it was breathing. Granted, there are times and places for more or less formality, but any dinner with friends or family featured most of these norms. They were not, of course, the least bit demanding in time or effort. Preparation of a meal, indeed, took some time, setting of a simple table with 3-6 places took 10 minutes or far less [I had that job for years], the rest is just habit. I mostly eat in front of the tv by myself, of course. But all this comes back at need.
Making your own dinners at home a little more formal is a great way to learn to eat slower as well, which I have trouble with. Very nice video and you're very likeable yourself, bravo.
Uii... I really have to learn tabble maners. From time to time, I sit together with high management from very good local companies and I represent an high management too. I feel like a guy from the street. I just know some basics before. I am very thankfull for that video.
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The "Don'ts" in this video are hilarious. Your "unrefined face" is incredible.
Tommy Noble õqqippqpqlqMM
Tommy Noble I
Yeah enjoyed watching the negatives.
Tommy Noble : I am still laughing. I have very bad table manners obviously but I will learn everything he just taught!!!
Tommy Noble nothing wrong with good manners and no. one on the list of good manners is don’t hurt other people’s feelings.
My mother telling me these things drove me crazy as a kid. Now here I am paying close attention as an adult. Thanks mom for putting up with me.
Lies again? Don't point using fork and knife while eating food to show sign of courtesy
Oh
Mother taught me this and we followed this at home. Should be taught at school. A pleasure
Same! But it was my dad for me
Because as you grow you start to give more importance to your community and so start to do things that are seen as good, even if they have no sense in it.
If you would have been raised in a society where the norm is eating with your hands, that's what you would have looking forward to learn
"Making sure people are comfortable within your presence".
*One of the most important things in life*
🆗
Table manners should be taught in America.
AGREED. So tired of children getting up and down and taking food out to the other room and making a mess. And the adults with your phone either on the table in their lap or in their hand while they're trying to talk to you simultaneously with the Snapchat Facebook whatever. Don't forget the kids going mom mom mom mom mom mom mom mom mom all trying to have a grown-up civilized discussion. I miss the calm have a dinner, tidy up the dishes, let's have dessert all together, big dining room table meals.
Actually, what is of utmost importance is that *you* are okay with your own presence. If not, it may be time to check out.
@@revokdaryl1 Thank you. It seems that taking responsibility for everyone's emotional comfort but your own has gone too far now.
If you happen to have allergies but did not give the host sufficient time. Then make sure you bring your epinephrine with you, as it is impolite to die on the table.
Hilarious
Jason Innes 🤣🤣😁😂
😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂
😊😂🤣
I came from the ghetto and I'm really trying to change. This is competily opposite of how i was raised but i love it so much thank you for helping me you guys are amazing
bro ur white
@@keremoyunda2265you can be from the ghetto and be white? 😂
@keremoyunda2265 so There's no white people in the ghetto? In what world do you live in?
You're smart. Manners are telling and they're important in making business connections. Never stop growing.
@keremoyunda2265 that really shows how much you know with that statement right there.
So...my dad taught me well. 99% of what you showed here is what I learned from my father. I was raised in Japan and U.S. I am blessed to have appreciation for both culture. Thank you!
@@ningqi Get out of here.
I also learned most these things from my father.
@@ningqi really? so much for the japanese master race
@@ningqi maybe I am a Tang Chinese
Even me! I leart all these from your father as well!
I grew up in a working class family and when having holiday dinners at my grandparents we always had multiple courses with stacked plates, many utensils, napkin etc. I learned where the napkin went and general good table manners at a young age and I appreciate it more now as i've gotten older. This isn't a luxurious or wealthy class thing at all, we were not wealthy. This is plain and simple good table manners.
me too thanks to my grandparents i miss them every single day
BLTspace On a rather ironic note, class is classless, you can have millionaires like Cardi B or middle class family with enough education and class to pass traditions and etiquette to younger generations.
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
I think this very much depends on the country. In most european countries, this would be seen as quiet weird. Here, you lay the napkin next to your plate and put the knife and the fork on top of it.
@@chiarareiner3179 in Germany it is quite normal to Place the napkin right
This is the 3am content I was looking for.
No way man...me too...I am also watching this at 2: am...it's funny why I always watch this type of content late at night...😀😀😀
2:48 am for me 😂
Same here
12am for me but I know I'll be watching more from this channel later on.
Badass 3am challenge real fookin spooks
The salt and pepper tip is so good! As a cook myself, I hate when people salt the food before they try it.
Its like they're saying "I assume your food is bland"
@@jeffmyersmusic exactly!
@@jeffmyersmusic Not so. I like a lot more salt than everyone else that I've ever met. So if the host seasons the meal 'correctly', ie. to most people's taste, then I KNOW that I will need more salt so I don't need to try it to find out.
I imagine you are also delighted when people put Ketchup on the fine food, as well! LOL
@@Chris-hf2sl to understand how much salt u need u must try one spoon frst
“If you travel abroad, be aware of the cultural differences...”
Here in Japan slurping is good manners.
i've heard this about ramen shops. where do they stand on audible "nom nom" sounds?
They even eat some food without any knife and fork
well not all asians countries accept that... definitely not here in Korea😨
it's considered good manners to slurp Pho' too, it tells the chef that youre enjoying the food
In some countries passing the salt from hand to hand as shown here is bad luck, you are supposed to pass it but sit it on the table for her/him to reach it.
the most important table manner would be to not react negatively if someone does something that you perceive as bad table manners.
Great comment. This is the first "table manner" everyone should learn.
Great comment. It's so common to see people jumping to conclusions without understanding another person's culture. Keep calm and eat your food!
I can stand anything except "LOUD burrrrps"!!!!
Hasna Hashim what about loud farts?
@@magnetar2524 Uh oh! Need to edit my comment🤪
You're teaching me all the stuff my dad was supposed to teach me little by little. Thank you sir.
HAHAHAA SAME HERE I GUESS YOU CAN SAY HES A GOOD SPORT
Your dad probably tried…….you were to young to notice or care, no?
Creaping rat the use gutter and icicles with 4 fryers as the top shields to cover what the situation was then 😂
Thank you for a great video! As a blind person, I greatly appreciate all the detailed descriptions. I even got to find out how you were dressed. Beautiful! You almost never see that anymore.
A few years ago I went for a trip on the Canberra cruise liner (age 14), all the meals were formal. I was initially quite concerned that there may be something I was unaware of at meal times. Seems that my parents had trained me up to the required standards when I was a kid, and nothing cropped up that was unexpected. Correct table manners are something that people should learn as kids.
I'm 50 & 🇺🇸. I understand the "napkin" on the lap bit but I RARELY do it longer than 5-10min. I'd wipe my mouth or hands as needed. That is improper.
I remember in 4th grade I picked up a book called “A Web of Manners”. I still brag I can set a table for more than two courses to this day~
Very commanding, unfortunately today's parents teaching their children total ignorance toward personal culture.
The general believes are the bigger Baboon you are the better chance to survive in the jungle of life. VARY SAD!!!
@@pauljastrzebiec-milewski4410 Our society rewards bad behavior nowadays.
My wife has a wonderful mother. I'm lucky there. When she was a teenager she scolded her over her table manners. She said you will meet a man who will not like your table manners and be embarrassed. She was correct. I had to teach her proper table manners. The funny part is I'm a dirtbag scaffolder. Thankfully I have a great mom who like your parents taught me etiquette. As an adult I now own a scaffold mob and manners are again important. I'll teach my little ones the same. Even a blue collar man can be a gentleman when he needs to be.
This is about the first time I've actually felt I was watching a "how to behave" video on TH-cam that was genuinely useful, not condescending, and looks so classy it was inspiring. As well as being a little bit light-hearted. Yes, table manners make OTHER PEOPLE feel comfortable. You know, all those people who aren't you?
And this gentleman deserves the Nobel Prize, a Guggenheim Fellowship and a Canada Council Grant for #1: TURN OFF your cell phone and put it away. The cell phone has done more to ruin people's manners than the egg salad sandwich, and that's saying a lot. Brilliance.
Merci
I agree. Cell phone is going to ruin our manners. Everywhere you look, you see someone on the phone 😱
@david....exactly like our home eck. teacher taught us 50 years ago. except for the cell phone.
@@bilbil7331 eck???
@@bonniekuhn1366 Home economics. Basically, cookery and housecraft.
The best story I heard on this was about Prince Albert, the consort to Queen Victoria. In the old days there would be a glass tumbler on the table to wash your fingers in. At a social gathering a working class man mistakenly drank it. Prince Albert immediately drank his, and so every other person at the table was obliged to drink theirs. Now that is true manners. It's not about ostracising people, it's about making them feel comfortable.
so if the working man broke wind what would Prince Albert do ?
Patrick I certainly respect the spirit of the guests. But where do you draw the line when it comes to making the mistake memorable? I'm sure he felt mortified afterward. He probably hoped people would just let it go, but here we stand we in 2018. Lol
That's not just manners, that's 100% pure, raw, unfiltered class.
Perfectly true That is why i was embarrassed when President Obama made a mistake on following his speech he asked the guests to rise and salut the queen by sipping champagne. He forget the anthem . In my view her majesty should have done like Albert. She made the President look foolish.
@nunya inct How dare you, the former president had plenty of class. Everyone makes mistakes, that's no reason to label someone classless. Especially not someone who in such a high seat of power must've attended numerous formal events himself.
Watched this a few months ago because I was bored.
Watching this now because I need to attend to a formal party.
How was the party 🤣
@@northerngypsysoul always awkward
This is amazing. I finally feel like table manners are not about being rich or snobbish, just about making everyone else feel respected and comfortable.
You got it.
I learned every single one of these tips as a little kid mostly from my mother commenting during dinners over a few yrs. time....pure class.
I i did too .
I am a father of 3, and I find this channel/videos fascinating. My daughters (13 & 10) can set & serve traditional dinners properly, while my son (17) can cut his food without looking silly & pick out the intricate details of a bespoke suit! It's required viewing in my home! So many children lack even the most basic of daily etiquette. I'm thrilled I found this channel!
❤️
You should teach your girls to cut food and your boy to serve and prep, chores have no gender.
@@donnalee. I agree
@@donnalee. you should keep your crutches to yourself
@@youcrazycat1 you should get rid of crutches once you recovered I guess
You just summarized my childhood in less than 20 minutes. My parents were very strict with manners, and now as an adult they come naturally to me. The only conflict I had growing up was that my parents divorced early on: my Dad had (and expected) Continental manners, while my Mom had (and expected) American manners. So if I mixed them up and used the "wrong" manners with either of them, I would get into serious trouble. Thank you for sharing this important knowledge with others!
Wow that sounds really stressful
It’s nice to have someone validate what had been taught to me. In addition, to have picked up a few pointers/tips. Thank you!
Likewise
I don’t get the American way? Some hold their forks in a weird way aka watch the Kardashians!
This is the most in-depth etiquette video I’ve seen on TH-cam. Great Job Raphael !
Growing up as a kid, our mother made us listen to her excerpts from the "Good Book of Manners" every other meal. What we thought was boring and repetitive, payed dividends throughout my life. Thanks for bringing class back into a classless society. Excellent video!
"Classless society" lol. I wish.
bro we spent ages trying to get rid of class and this guy is trying to bring it back
Hear hear!
@@tree427 there is Social Class and Classy Behaviour. He's referring to the latter. Classy Behaviour is not dependent on your social class. You could be a multimillionaire from an historic wealthy family or a poor builder. Both can behave with class or uncultured. My grandad never went to high school. He started working on building sites aged 12. He never, and I mean never, went out socially in tracksuits. Both he and my grandmother always dressed nicely, he wore suits with ties and vneck jumpers and treated everyone with respect. As a result they were both very well respected despite being immigrants in Britain in the 50s.
@@tree427 'Class' has nothing to do with 'rank', as in the British society of royals, aristocrats, landowners, workers, servants, etc. Some of the most classy people I know are of what some might consider 'lower rank'. I've seen (and so have you, if you watched our former president with the Queen of England) filthy rich people behave like utter slobs with no class whatsoever. The idea is to be polite, kind and not make others feel inferior based on their income or lack thereof. THAT'S what America was all about when it was founded.
After this pandemic ends Imma be a perfect gentleman.
Hello, looks like it has been 2 months! And I feel like a true gentleman man. Between the 2 months I have married 4 times (not fexing )
Hello, 5 months after this video I have a wife that would stay now.
Hello, 11 moths after this video I have my first son but the pandemic isn't over.
Wonderful! You seem like a man of culture! 😩 👌 BRAVO
Man Of Culture stay a perfect gentleman throughout the pandemic.
what are you now?
Kellie Everts 48-28-38 conducts Night Train man. He is working to be more gentle
@@R00T.VVreced It never hurts. Considering the feelings of others is a good thing. It shows you love yourself, to be honest. Kindness is a wonderful quality, caring is great, respect for others, human, animals, nature, is a beautiful thing.
Created a course based on this video for my kids. You did a great job demonstrating both the correct and incorrect etiquette. THANK YOU SIR.
epic outfit .. this channel feels like my grandpa teaching me how to be a man...this channel is priceless, for everything else there is MasterCard
I feel like my grandfather could never teach me any of the things discussed on this channel, my father DEFINITELY couldn't.
I've only been watching this channel for a few months. It's crazy how much I have learned about dressing well and etiquette.
😂😂😂
Ciobanu Marius Constantin i
Thanks!
Don't start eating untill someone else starts to
What if everybody thinks so
The host must stat it first then
I wondered the same when he said that...
Sachin Subhash I think he said when they are served, if they are you can just wait for the host
We eliminate obesity. Everyone wins.
STALEMATE! SUDDEN DEATH BEGINS
My grandparents were very serious regarding etiquette. Bread was always buttered lying flat on the bread plate , never in hand . Soup eaten by drawing away with the spoon , never scooped toward you. No salt or pepper unless offered. Fork left hand always pointed down , index finger MUST rest on top of the knife while cutting, fingers not allowed to wrap around the knife handle..that would show that the food was improperly cooked and hard to cut. Spoon and fork always placed downwards on the plate to signify being finished...only an unused utensil was allowed to point upwards .BTW fork cutting is acceptable for deserts . I always thought it was a useless set of rules , but it stands out greatly when dining formally. You notice that others begin to copy you because it appears you have sort of special ritual knowledge . Appreciate the video.. brings back memories
Pure idiocy.
Your grandparents served as excellent examples. The rules regarding utensils (being pointed up or down) might be particular to your part of the world (For me, I place the fork and knife parallel and pointing toward the centre of the plate from the 4 o'clock position), but the discipline itself is admirable.
@Johnny Appleseed Don't put yourself down. Working men are the salt of the earth. Respect yourself by showing good manners. No man is unworty of refinement.
Yeah no, i'm good.😂
Silly thing with salt and pepper, too particular about the knife, but I tend to agree with the rest.
At one time, this would have been the norm. It's amazing how good etiquette and manners are needing to be taught by a TH-cam video. Very good content, thank you.
Ah, proper etiquette & table manners! A lost art of sorts. As a child of the '60s, these manners were taught & insisted upon by my parents on to my siblings and I. Starting at a young age and practiced in our home during Sunday's main family meals, at holiday meals, in restaurants and any other functions outside our home that included other folks (like certain church & country club functions, anniversary celebrations, wedding receptions etc). They were expected of us, no excuses. It was also expected of us to say "please" and "thank you". My sister & I were sent to "charm school" as soon as we met the age requirement. Boys also went to these etiquette schools. At the time I didn't see the point of all this stuff..but I practiced them growing up and as a parent, I taught my children to do the same. IMO, they are one of most important things we can teach our children. They can make or break another's first impression of you & your character. They make all the difference.
Good explanation and demonstration of good manners
"to my siblings and I"...that in itself is an indication of refinement. How I wish I was born in the '50s or '60s!
Proper etiquette is important,ill agree with that but some of the pointers are pretentious
Agree and had similar childhood
@@arijitdas5402 Surely it should be me not I?....🤔
I come from a family (immediate and extended) that took table manners seriously. When you reached a certain age, we would be sent to etiquette school and be expected to join the adults at the adult table. But most of my learning happened by helping set the table. In college and in early adult life, I realized etiquette and manners help me gain certain advantages academically, personally and professionally. It also helped me navigate interactions with people as I always knew what to do and say in all types of situations. If you are an adult now, I think it is worth it to take an etiquette class/charm school or at least read Emily Post books. Class and grace is how people remember you act around them and how you treated them. You gain so much from that, its like having a key that makes your life easier and better.
BTW, I would never place my napkin on the table like you showed here when leaving the table. It may signal to servers you are done with your course and might take your food away. Also, fellow diners wouldn’t want to see your used napkin right next to them. I would place my napkin on the chair.
About the napkin, I was told that was rude too, especially when put on your empty plate. Everyone does that nowadays.
Yes, if you have not finished your course/meal, and need to leave the table, the napkin goes on your chair, not back on the table!
Yes, about the napkin, I was taught to place in the chair as a placeholder. Also, ladies wearing lipstick should fold the napkin in half on her lap so as the smears from mouth wiping are on the interior, hidden from view. 🌹
That’s really interesting. i didn’t even know there was such thing as a manners school😅 can i ask where you’re from?
@@thewindgamer2607 If you’re asking me, I didn’t attend “Manners School”, my grandma taught me. Vogue’s 1948 Book of Etiquette was my manual. She also taught me to make my bed every morning so that no matter what else happened that day you know you have already accomplished something. 🥰 Cali, USA!
Also notice that when someone ask for the bowl with vegtables to be passed, do not serve yourself before passing it on, but ask for the bowl to be returned.
Also notice that when you scoop the vegetables into the spoon you do it from the side of the bowl towards the center, that way you avoid scooping food over the edge of the bowl and on to the table.
You hold a glass by the stem for two reasons, your hands wont alter the temperature of the wine and the glass loks nice and clean.
I was taught never to clink but salute when drinking wine.
This is western etiquette. In Eastern and Middle Eastern countries, the etiquette is at times the opposite..Heck even British and American table etiquette is different and both are western countries.
I am terrible with holding a glass at the stem, but you are completely right.
I clink with people next to me if I clink, to the other guests across the table I only lift my glass, nod and smile. That is with friends and family. In a formal setting no clinking just lift glass, nod and smile otherwise your sleeves might get caught, you have to sort of get up halfway, and it all becomes awkward with table decorations or, if there are candles, you set the place on fire.
Obv u don't serve urself first u look like a pork otherwise, this is basic
A wine glass has a stem, not a stalk.
@@YaleinPrague Sorry, and thank you for the correction, english is not my first language.
Great video. Great lesson. I have many times been out with a small group of people for dinner, and those who have never observed any table manners, through poor training or a lack of respect for others, stand out quite starkly.
A quick lesson is to try not to offend others around you while you are eating, e.g. making noises while you eat or talking with your mouth full. No one wants to see inside your mouth while you chew your food.
I was fortunate to have had a mother who attended an all women's school where etiquette class was mandatory. The three girls and one boy in the family were taught meal etiquette from childhood. With the relaxation of what is socially acceptable at the table, I and my elder sister are the only ones to continue these practices.
Even many waiters and waitresses no longer know how to read a table. Thank you.
Great story, go write a book now. I suggest Audible
My dad taught me one of the most important things about etiquette is that it sends a message. Its a type of communication, and the ability to use it in your favor can be extremely beneficial. You don't have to be extremely snobby every time, but instead communicate your thoughts and opinions through it. As a young adult, I have to relearn everything again, because my whole life I've eaten on the sidewalk or in my room, now it's time for me to start a professional life, and thus, learn to behave in formal situations, excelente video.
what did your dad tell you about avatar choices?
@@bluebellbeatnik4945stop it 😂😂😂😂😂
I'm so glad I found this channel, even though my upbringing and social class don't emphasize these manners I feel inspired to be a gentleman and a better person overall, more kind, more aware of my manners and how I carry myself. Thank you!
I support your growth all the way. My dad had no real example, was raised in the country by his grandmother. He truly was a country gentleman. As his daughter (1 of 3) I felt his strong gentle presence at all times. I never heard a bad word. He was respected and liked by all. He would tell his grandsons "A real man takes his coffee black and keeps his shoes polished". You will stand out, but in a very good way. As a mom of a 25 year old son, good for you.
@@saraG100 inspiring, thanks for sharing. I've recently turned 28 :) some things must be adaptated to the Brazilian context - hard to wear a suit in the hot summer! - but most tips I've found here are universal. That's the point I guess.
My dad also had his grandsons read a book called "How to win Friends and Influence People " by Dale Carnegie. It's quite old but as he made me read it too I can say the ideas are timeless and classy. Easy quick read. Kept thinking I should suggest it to you.
@@saraG100 thank you, I've read this one :D it's really popular.
Awesome!!!!! I learned a lot of this when I was in an exchange program to Germany. I knew done table manners before, but this brought back a ton of memories and I don’t accept less. Anytime I’m out or at someone’s home.. they always notice my table manners and are impressed. I love a formal table setting since we were too poor to have this.
Wonderful video.. much appreciation.
New subbie from Tampa Florida 🌴
"...always be kind, be generous, ask questions, listen, be a good sport, and smile." good words to live by. Excellent video
As a low-level peasant (!) this is not a world into which I would expect to be invited, but it was perhaps the most delightful and interesting video I've seen in a long time. What a smile you have. The personification of charm. Thank you.
You can do it anywhere. You don’t have to be in a place with wooden panels and a crested tapestry
the napkin, the mouth open, the elbows, the knife, the chair, etc
My mother raised me with these rules and I was always so annoyed at the time. Now I am greatful it is automatically ingrained and I am continuing to educate myself further and refresh my memory on them!
I live with people who pride themselves on bad manners. Watching this is like a breath of fresh air. If I try to use good manners I am made fun of. Civilized people is not a phrase I live with but this was a delight to watch.
Excellent video. Missed one point: before drinking, use your napkin to wipe your mouth. Nothing worse than some sort of sauce left on your glass! My mother was from a large poor family who practiced, well, let's say, very informal customs. She made a point to learn from others. In our home she always set a fine table, and set it beautifully, and we grew up practicing proper etiquette on a daily basis. Eating is one of the sensuous pleasures of life -- make the most of it!
life have a a time for every thing
you are not supposed to wipe your mouth with a napkin because when you eat properly and with manners there be no sauce or any food stuffs to wipe away. but it sometimes happens that you will need to wipe you mouth because...and use the napkin(lol i need 10 napkins eating burritos)
When I grew up in the 60's and 70's even poor families or lower middle class families taught their children manners for how to behave at other people's homes and how to be polite at the table, how to speak to your friends parents. I don't see this much any more.
@@sherry1072 Agreed. Manners are for everyone, irrespective of economic differences.
You should do a video about fragrances.
I enjoy this channel. I grew up in the hotel industry. Many of my father’s employees and supervisors were European. We dressed for dinner, we used etiquette, and behaved in manners differently than today. It was a good life! 😊
linswango n
Sounds like a boring life.....
@@jakirmalik9399it can't be any more boring than your life though
As a teenager, I always hated being forced to follow table manners. I assumed table manners were for the pretentious and arrogant. Table manners is just a kill joy. But as I have grown older, I realize it just comes down to respect. A real gentleman comes down to respecting others, no matter what may be the difference. This video has some great information on doing just that. Thanks for the tips.
Kurtanius21 it just shows so much control and finesse. I'm from a poor family, poor friends, poor schooling, poor neighbourhood but expensive University education. By the time I got to university I was so unrefined that every interaction was somewhat embarrassing, which says a lot since University students aren't exactly refined. Now I'm the most refined and respectable person among all of my friends.
I used to slur my words as well. Now I am dripping finesse left, right and centre.
It’s a shame though that humans haven’t learnt the manners and etiquette of not killing eachother
T K You seem very humble too,that’s actually great /s
I come from a blue collar/labor, African-American Family. My parents were from rural Texas and Arkansas; who migrated to California to live, work and raise a family of 5 children. It was required to learn and use any and all table manners that were available to us. Of course we didn't have 3 different forks to use during our meals, but we had to learn to use our manners every time we sat down to eat any where and with anyone! My mother and my father taught us. My mother had beautiful China and Silver that we used only on special occasions and holidays. I am an only girl among 4 brothers. I thank God for parents who instructed us in correct, proper dining habits so that...as my father would say...."So you can dine with good manners and class from Watts to Beverly Hills."
@@monjier Wonderful!! Part of our goals in life always include self-improvement.
When we were chidren, we learned all of these rules. And we still use them today. Two things that spoil dining out - when everyone is texting and when folks bring their screaming children and let them do as they please.
This was spot-on! As someone who has traveled international for business and for speaking - how you appear before others is very important!
You seems like the kind of guy that make millions per year.
Can you give me tips on business and or wealth building? I am just 16 yrs old.
@@mdrahman6732 to begin - START INVESTING EARLY! Save and invest as much as you can. You can never substitute for what is called compounded interest. Look it up. And never live above your means.
@Mr. Sir I don't mind what people think about me in a lot of things, but for just simple common sense things I care about other peoples feelings. For example I almost went crazy when I heard the chomping in this video. I can't control it, it's like a phobia and it makes me feel so uncomfortable and lose my appetite.
Similarly if my friend or anyone is easily disgusted by say a dirty napkin on the table, I would do my best not to make another person feel that way because I know it can feel terrible. (it depends on how well you know the person/people honestly)
@@DrRobertMPick awwe you replied to the 16 yo, that made me so happy for some reason xD.
And I agree with that tip about not living above your means, I've learned from my mistakes huhuhu .
At my elementary school, in 4th grade we did a “Manner’s Luncheon.” We spent time learning table manners before hand. Then one day, we had a “fancy” lunch in the cafeteria. We dressed up and boys sat the girls down, etc. It was really fun and informative. I learned more about manner’s from West Point and the military, where it is expected that a military officer acts genteel.
When do your English lessons begin? Why do you place an apostrophe in manners as you did?
@jackieporter5323 ::
jackie, give him a break, why don't ya ?
First off ::
He used quotation marks around "Manner's Luncheon" which means someone else probably effed-up.
Second off (?) ::
Is it his "English" that needs "lessons" or his possessive case usage ?
_[ Oh, what a tangled web we weave when jumpin' on someone else ! ]_
@@jackieporter5323 :: OOPS !!
My bad ‼️ I just read his last sentence where he does use an apostrophe in "manners".
_[ Oh, what a strangling web I weaved when not minding my own business ‼️ ]_
Please be gracious enough to accept my apologies (?)
@@jackieporter5323Luncheon belonging to manners? Similar to day's end?
I'm in the 8th grade and my friend's taking me to a military ball and I'm SO nervous because I'm a complete party girl 😭
I’m here because I’m learning this in school...I’ve been eating like this every night for a week, my parents look at me like I’m crazy as I take 2 hours to eat
Same in Home EC
Good food should never be rushed
@@greghart6310 Amen!
I tried it with my bojangles meal. My chicken got cold 💀
What kind of school do you go to? This stuff was never taught to me.
I’m not afraid to admit it is my girlfriend know this a couple things and bad habits that I had that I didn’t even realize this video is very helpful to the point where I saved it in my personal notes. This video has been very helpful.
"If you ever have to leave the table, make sure it's for a maximum of 5 minutes, otherwise it's very impolite and rude"
Apparently, nobody at Brazzers is aware of this
@@mr.holiday8995 ewww
Best comment ever 😂😂😂😂😂
sharran vishvanath someone needs to say something, they can’t go on in this way. It simply will not do!
Man of culture I see 😂😂😂😂😂👍🏽
Hahaha
"Do not chew with your mouth open and make sounds like a pig."
My dad: :/
Everyone's dad: :\
Tell this to the Chinese
My brother ):
Almost everyone's dad 😭
My wife.
So my friends pointed out that they are not usually comfortable when eating with me in any restaurant setting because I follow almost all of these instructions.
I was really taught to eat that way ever since I was a kid, and i never noticed that I do.
But apparently following such behavior made them thing that I might judge them if they do not xD
It sounds like their more self conscious about their own lack of table manners then this being your issue.
Personally I somehow managed to absorb continental table manners at some point even though I grew up with the 'switching' American way. I also tend to eat quite quickly.
best way to defuse that situation is to follow the etiquette rules to a 'T' but then letting rip a smelly loud one, your co-diners will feel so much more at ease 👍
The goldne rule is to eat how everyone else is, otherwise they might feel uncomfortable
I do judge people with bad table manners 😅😅
My eating companions tell me that I always eat all of my veggies first, all of my starches next and then my meat; and that I rarely drink during the meal. I didn’t realize this but I remember growing up I had a small appetite and this was how my mom taught me to eat. Good job, mom!
So refreshing to see someone teaching how to behave properly.
Agree. We have lost so much of these small, but significant, details. You really notice bad manners when everyone else has good-to-great manners.
As an individual, I highly value the significance of learning about proper etiquette including table etiquette, and I will continue to increase my general knowledge of proper etiquette as I grow older. Likewise, I ought to acquaint myself with the rules and customs of proper etiquette that are established in every country on Earth. Thank you sincerely for posting this video!
Well I am impressed by the way you expressed your point. You followed all the writing etiquette.
*rolls eyes into back of skull*
@@saeedthwalhath *tips fedora*
Glad to learn that this was all well known to me at my age of 18.
Having a true gentleman as father is great.
Since barely anything was new for me, I think I should compliment my parents ^^
Agreed!
He made the mistake of emptying a bottle of red wine; even when there's no sediment a little should remain at the bottom. (It also provides an acceptable counter balance when you throw it over your shoulder to the butler.)
Lol, I was going to say the same thing, if you need a youtube video to show you how to eat, what sort of education did your parents give you :P
Barry A. I also prefer continental. There are some things I'm not sure of, like when you finish eating is the knife on the outside or inside? Also is the fork facing up or down. I tend towards down. I heard that was a more British style of doing things.
Calm down
Beautiful etiquette 101 presentation. I'm impressed that you addresed the cellphone and to put it away.
I like how you address some differences in different countries
16:38 "Be kind, be generous, ask questions, listen, be a good sport, and smile." Well, that's just all-around solid advice, isn't it?
I am glad that you've taken the time and effort to promote good manners, grooming and appearance. Keep up the good work
Right even if this is not your style you can still learn to be neat. I have seen men who only wear jeans but they are always clean, neatly pressed, belt, nice shirt and clean shoes. I think like you said it is the grooming not so much it has to be a suit. I miss that about men now a days. They are disheveled looking now.
My mother taught my brother and me table manners since we were kids. And it's always good to refresh the knowledge. Sometimes we keep practicing the basics but forget other things (for example, I just noticed I need to refine my manners regarding hte use of my phone). Thank you for this video and for creating this channel. I'm subscriber from now on.
Phones in my parents house have always been a BIG no no. You would NEVER touch you phone while on the table. Unless it rang and you needed to reject the call and put it on silent, and excuse yourself for it.
I'm American and I always got chastised for the continental method with the upside down fork.. even though this is the most efficient way!! I wish this video had been around during my childhood.
It annoys me!
The fork is bent to stab meat, not to act as a spoon.
I think the presenter is making the point that efficency is not the sole issue when eating in public. On that basis, one could just pick up the plate and shovel the food off it. Hmm. Could be worth a try, mind you.
Take small bites so you can quickly swallow and respond to questions if asked. I am in the US and was taught to never butter the entire piece of bread at once, and always break off a piece, butter it, put down your knife, then pop the small piece of bread in your mouth. I was also taught that in the US you don't hold your knife in your hand while eating (in the continental style), because it looks aggressive, makes you eat faster, you might accidentally gesture with your knife holding hand, and you can't put your hand in your lap (American style) if you are holding a knife! You are so right, being gracious and forgiving is the best table manner of all.
Yes, I was told the same!😅
Different countries have different customs. Only need to be aware.
It's my understanding that here in the US it is acceptable to butter the entire piece of bread if it is warm..
As a waiter, I wish more people ate like this. It's always nice to see when someone stacks their plates for me to clear up, or even better, they put it all on a tray. It's a simple thing but it can make someone's day a little more fun. Also doing stuff like putting cutlery in the done position, as it means I can clearly tell that you're done and I should clear your table next.
How was i never aware that stacking plates is seen as rude. Maybe it's not a thing in Ireland or maybe it's just because i work at a 3 star hotel and it's a much more casual enviroment.
Wait, DO stack the plates? I used to stack plates all the time, neatly, because it just seemed helpful and like an easier way for the wait staff to grab them. Then I kept reading that you should NOT do this. Something about concern that perhaps I would stack things improperly. So I stopped. Now I don't know what to do. Just trying to make life easier for servers!
@@andrewkelly6828 depends on how you stack them. To me, the fact that you even tried is a good thing. Even if it's stacked poorly, it still makes it easier. There's these 2 guys that come in every day and eat like pigs. They leave sugar packets all over the table, plates and bowls all around, spilled tea and coffee, EVERYTHING. Cleaning that table is horrible. But even just stacking a few plates or putting the cutlery together helps.
very bad manners to stack plates
@@DaytonaStation is it? I don't understand how it would be.
@@bigmanmccheez5342 it's not elegant and can be awkward. Removal of plates is for the server to do. The diners are to focus on each other. Now if it's a really casual restaurant then its not a problem.
A good habit is to blot your lips before you drink from your glass as the French do .That way the glass will be free of smudges and the glass will not loose its sparkle ! It is refined, lol. When interrupting your eating in order to speak, do not point your utensils upwards , keep them close to your plate ,, pointing down . Do not bring your face to the fork, rather bring the fork to your mouth , so you are able to sit straight in your chair , rather then bending down .I learned all that as a little girl from my German father . We actually had to put books under the arms and hold them there, until we were used to keeping the arms close to the sides of the body . I am very grateful to my father for taking the time to teach us good table manners , it is a blessing and I feel comfortable dining among dignitaries , lol.
You are lucky to have such a caring father.
I found this video EXTREMELY amusing. Not at all because of the content, just the opposite. It showed me how I have been a complete slob almost always acting along with the "don'ts." Most people around here don't even know what table manners are. Now that I have learned, I feel much more self confident. I can practice, even if my peers don't notice. Thank you greatly for your help.
I can’t explain it but I’m utterly addicted to this entire channel.
Tradition means being taught by word of mouth. Manners are being lost by lack of transmittal. Thank you for continuing the tradition.
@Robert Walker
I was a stay at home mom, therefore my theory has been that there was no one at home to teach their kids the proper way to do things, such as eat.
In Greece, if you're invited at 8:00pm and you actually be there on time, your host probably hasn't gotten out of the shower
That also happens in Mexico
in Bangladesh too😂
Serbia as well - I really don't like it. I am always at a place right on time, in minute. If I see that I'll arrive sooner than I should, I slow down, take a detour. If I happen to be late, even for a minute or two, I make sure that people know it. And anything more than 5 minute delay is simply unacceptable unless there was some unforeseen event, like a car accident on a bridge and you are stuck in traffic. As herr Flick would say "Do not be late. Do not be early. Be PUNCTUAL!" :)
Hahahaha I‘m ayrab and that‘s, well, pretty much everytime I meet someone. We always say „let‘s meet at 7“ wich means were meeting at 8:30
Σωστοοοοοοοοοος
Ok. This is a video EVERYONE should watch. Emphasizing those who eat with an open mouth
Hello Mr. Schneider, you just uploaded a very nice video. I remember the first time i went out for a formal lunch with some important people. I have been raised in a middle class family and barely had the opportunity to go out and eat at upper class restaurants. I was a bit nervous so i chose the "go slow, watch and then do" strategy. I would watch the other men and copy their actions. It helped and gradually it became a habit. I am a businessman and i believe it's very important to maintain a good image of yourself when you go out and eat (does not matter if it's formal or informal). Manners maketh man. Thanks for uploading Mr. Schneider!
Thank you for sharing, Karan. :)
Karan Vito
Same here! You can usually get through these kind of situations without embarrassing yourself, if you pay attention and let others take the lead. Which you should, when you’re a ‚novice‘ anyway. I did do the ‚drinking when toasted to’ thing though, so ‚ups‘ on that.
@@raraavis7782 Hey thanks for sharing Rara!
Table manners = 18 minutes
My eating time = 5 minutes
😆😆🤣
My eating time is 3 minutes
Haha
☺️😋☺️😋☺️😁😋
Is that for 7 or 8 courses?
me watching this on bed, eating a plate of fish with a spoon: *_"Interesting"_*
wait.....whaaaat?
Dude same!
You use silverware? I go full Bear Grills
Just use your hands!
Me on the toilet before work at a liquor store "I'm so f***ing high class dawg"
I grew up in a family where table manners were greatly encouraged. I was very young when I was taught how to eat with the different utensils. Even in our country house we taught to eat properly. I’m very grateful for this education as I have had many opportunities to practice it in my life.
Thank you for your lesson.
Well, in Moroccan culture we have:
- a table
- 1 plate in the middle
- 1 big bread
- 20 fingers to eat from the same plate
And it works .. it's easy peasy lol
You people are sofisticated.
efficient
U deserved inter galactic gold medal
same in Syria 😂😂😂
Moroccans rock
A good way to keep conversation going is the Dale Carnegie method of getting people to talk about themselves, which everyone loves to do. A good open-ended question is "how did you come to...?" about a career or other important choice. You will become known as a good conversationalist without speaking much.
:)) Will try that next time.
great advice!
Dayum boyo thanks a ton :))))
After watching this I realized that all those times that I got invited to "informal" diners after work or during lunch time, I eat like a barbaric Viking in the Dark Ages
Woah hehe, three *different* periods of history there.
Me: Stone age
You are just simply uneducated in manners, that is all. So this will help.
Haha!
@@GuruRasaVonWerder The problem with me is that when my friends are the ones don't pay attention to table manners, it feels awkward to eat like what this video shows me. Besides, eating with hands is the most normal way to eat in my country (Indonesia), it's not bad manners as long as you don't chew out loud or with your mouth open. It's also fine as long as you don't get messy and clean your plates, though I always eat rice with spoon
This is so helpful. I always wonder if I am taking food pieces that are too large, because I always have to make people wait for a a few seconds, before I can answer their questions.
Eat when it's their turn to talk and they should also know when to ask question... Plus, try to adjust your speed. :)
Isn't it great when, at a restaurant, the waiter always asks you a question the very moment after you've taken a bite?
I remember, when I was in school in Europe, ones a week ,in middle school, we had a class, called Estatics. We learned all this stuff. Great video 🙌
I showed this to a homeless down the street
he is my boss now.
Lol
🤣
What does it say about you?.
Talib Ali 🤣🤣🤣🤣. I am laughing but good table manners is important! 😁
I'm homeless xD .. PLEASE COME show me (although I already did) hoping I soon change :)
I really appreciate these manners; my dad made sure to teach them to me, as he had learned them from our great aunt. I suppose our family took a lot of pride in table etiquette. I found out it was due to one of our relatives being a former teacher on the Spanish royal court. The last reminder is the best; it's simply rude to chastise and criticize guests or hosts especially at an informal affair. It's great to show off skills, but not at the expense of others esteem and comfort. The point of etiquette is to create a comfortable and fun atmosphere.
And don't start eating until the hostess has placed her napkin and takes the first bite.
Terrific presentation - refined, humorous, and really practical. This is information that could help somebody make money, forge lasting connections, and be invited back - I plan to share this and other videos of yours with several people in my life. I want to really listen and pay attention will be the ones who will be successful. Thank you VERY much!
"Eat at a normal pace"
I'm out.
Hhhhhhhhh same
too many Ts & Cs hahahaaaaaa
I was born in early '70 and those were the tables manners my mother insisted upon. Both she and my grand mother were teachers . I taught those to my children who were always perceived as very courteous and polite by their teachers...
I note the word "teach" in your comment. Today, parents seem afraid to teach their children. A lost responsibility of being a parent, now that everyone is addicted to iPhones and themselves.
@@egverlanderexactly
Those were the days when America was America, Who - in all fairness cares today what the teacher's perception of about anything for that matter. How is their behavior?
Whos telling who off now?😭
They served me Biryani.I tried to eat that with fork,they tell me gently."Get out."
Hilarious! :-D
Hilarious 😂😂😂. They told you gently with love get out
You can actually eat a biriyani with a fork and spoon! !! The fork can help you tear apart the chicken and stuffs!!!
@@amalvroy9920 i guess he was being funny.
@@amalvroy9920 Bro, different foods are better eaten different ways...just bcz you can do that doesn’t mean it is the best or right way to do that.
This man's smile just brings me so much joy. You sir, have earned yourself a new sub. Now thanks to you, I could use these methods when I meet my crushes parents. That is if they serve food.
Also: never go to social functions starving. No way to behave nicely while statving.:)
best comment
Majority of my horrible table manners have come from starving...actually, all of them.
That happened to me
Like the Queen? Always eats beforehand. My husband does too, just incase he might not like what the host in s serving.
you're not you when you're hungry
Now I have to search for
"The etiquette of refusing a dinner invitation"
Have you find it? I could learn from it
Through rsvp maybe?
lol
Excuse me, I’ve seen a video about table etiquette and I don’t want to eat tied.
hhaahahhahahah
I never realized how impolite I’ve been.
😂😂😂😂😂😂
But they noticed hahaha
Believe me in today's world no one cares about this and if you do have a potential boss to whom this matters, then he or she is going to be too nitpicky to work with in the first place.
@@faithfulforever6331 I care. I am disgusted when I dine with most Americans, it ruins the ambience of the meal for me.
@@GuruRasaVonWerder To each their own. "Ambience at meals" is usually not something I am concerned with having. To me, eating is something I have to do to stay alive. I mean, that is to say, that I am not a pig with no table manners and I am concerned with the comfort of others, but I can truthfully say that unless a person is loud or has their cell phone on and is using it at the dinner table, not much upsets me when I eat with others.
I love your channel, I'm from the middle class and it is really helpful to learn good manners and subtle stuff I would never have learned otherwise. Thanks a lot.
These tips of dining etiquette bring back fond memories of my father. Even though he was a front line combat military officer, he always insisted upon correct manners at the table. Some additional rules which we had to obey were never coming to the table without washing our hands and face. In addition, elbows were never allowed to touch the table. I can not stress how helpful good manners have
influenced my life and career. Finally, I wish you would comment on us lefties. We sometimes make a faux pax while negotiating the right hand world of table etiquette.
Another thing: (at least in Italy, where I live) it’s considered truly impolite to whisper to your table neighbor. It simply shows you have some secrets that might be unpleasant to the other guests or that you are willing to exclude others from your conversation. So if you have to say something to someone it’s preferred to say it to everyone or to privately tell the interested ones later after the meal. I remember sitting at a formal lunch and some guests whispering to each other ignoring the host’s conversation or questions. These people made the host very angry. Not a surprise they didn’t get an invitation from that host anymore.
In the United States you will find yourself more in a setting where with larger venues at a larger table, multiple conversations regarding smaller amounts of people occur.
Hola, en mi caso depende de la cantidad de gente, yo vivo en México y en mi casa en la cena de Navidad somos muchas personas en una mesa larga así que puedes conversar con las personas más cercanas. Por otra parte cuando comemos pocas personas mantenemos una única conversación y personalmente me parecen de mala educación los susurros y cuchicheos.
Liam It’s considered impolite everywhere I would think. I know a couple who have a habit of whispering to each other in company (not just at the table). My husband and I find it very rude. Unfortunately, they’re relatives so we just put up with it and think they’re rude and childish.
Political Status Yes but it’s obvious in an intimate setting when people are whispering. In a large venue it can get noisy so people often have to move closer to talk and other people st the table can’t hear. That’s different. Perfectly understandable.
How about whispering to someone explaining you are on your period, or asking where is the bathroom?
Ooooooooo that napkin goes on ur lap??? I thought you're supposed wipe the plate with it several times before the meal...
Now I know why I didn't get that job. Thank u man.
Should have applied for the dish washer position then. Right credentials.
@@tag7299 hahahah
No, you don't wipe the plate with your napkin. You lick it clean and thus show appreciation to your hostess for her fine fare. You really don't need a napkin if you are wearing socks.
Thank you for mentioning to hold the wine-glas by its stem. Even Hollywood do it the wrong way. Your Guide is spot-on. Cheers from Austria.
And don't cut your toast!
Great video. My grandfather lived in Communist Poland as a dirt farmer. They were so poor they had dirt floors. He comes from the upper class before the Communist came, stripping them of all his wealth.
They could beat everything out of him but they could not take the gentleman out of him. He taught us all as his grandkids to eat this way. It always looks good it doesn't matter how poor you are. It does set your stage in society. Even now you can see from photos or hes at the table that he was a gentleman by the way he held himself. I watch these to remind myself so that in the future when they see my photos they will look at me the same way. We are not bums and broads where are ladies and gentlemen.
Great video I'm going to direct my kids here.
I hate Communism so much it's unreal
Eating habits are a dead giveaway when you meet people who got educated under a communist system. Marx declared social and table manners a fallacy of the rich. Don't be surprised when they reach out with their fingers for anything on the table. Break off parts, and return the rest "for the community". And of course, always clean fingers - they lick them while they help themselves. No - these are not snobs - but people you talk about culture, music, art, Opera, in between reach out for olives or nuts without using utensils.
👍🏻 my parents come from Czechoslovakia and I was taught most of this by the harsh hand of my father, and if I ever got it wrong he never failed to use said hand to make me realize that mistake. I had proper table manners all my life and whenever we went on a cruise and ate at the Captain’s dinner I always was shocked at the horrible manners of most Americans. I had fun pretending that we were wealthy and seeing how “proper” I could be at dinner. We always were complimented, which was nice since I was a middle-class kid, though in the 80’s we were in better times. Love the video!
My gran is Russian and worked at a weaving factory. The manners at her birthday dinners came down to "no refusal to try something when asked" (rarely followed), "no raws" (mostly my mom's invention) and "no slurping". She lives in a small apartment and doesn't have a dining table and nearly enough chairs for all the guests. She used two small foldable tables, a sofa, stools and a small kickstand for herself.
As an officer, in the officers mess, etiquet is always observed. And when I was in, most of us looked forward to a civilised meal, especially if there were ladies in attendance. Being an officer and a gentleman are afterall a longstanding tradition in most military units around the world. Especially when serving in their country. Knowing what to do and what to say is afterall, diplomatic. It goes a long way to creating friendships, partnerships and a guaranteed invitation to the next event. Knowing and understanding different cultures, I believe, is vital to forming friendly and valued conversation. Born, raised and educated in South Africa (any South African, born in my era, can speak a minimum of two languages proficiently) and coming from a Portuguese family. I was brought up to observe, respect and learn as much as possible from those around me (a multitude of cultures and languages) but never to forget where I came from (the family name is what we represent through our words and followed by our actions). Traditionally, a meal eaten in company of others, is an oportunity to learn and create friendships through a common medium such as food :)
Great channel . . . I have learnt a lot over the decades and I have not stopped learning, your channel is proof of that. Thank you for further educating us, fantastic presentation.
Respect!!!
Never use fingers to eat!
Indian: left the chat.
Medo Kiews 😂
M indian too , but I wont eat without a spoon or fork .
Most original people of the earth eat with their hands. Utensils is a Caucasoid thing.
Well. Finish a full plate of chicken Biriyani without using hands and then we can talk.
BIRYANI LOVERS♥️♥️
A helpful refresher. I'm guilty of putting my elbows on the table and eating too fast. My Mom taught us these manners and I think they covered them in school, too. But with years of a rougher sort of lifestyle, I forgot some of them. A couple of times I've felt awkward when eating with people who remained more refined. Now I'll be more careful!
Thank you for this well done video. I was raised this way, but lost some of my grace, especially living here in California. I'm re-learning my manners on many different levels, so I thank you, Gentleman's Gazette
I'm surprised by some of the pushback. My parents were of Scottish working class origin, were raised in tenements, and were nonetheless raised with all these habits. I'll bet they were hungrier growing up in the late 40s than most Americans are ever going to be unless actually desperately poor. They ended up with high-school education and would be considered upper-working class where they came from or, in North America, 'lower middle class', and taught me most or all of this as if it was breathing. Granted, there are times and places for more or less formality, but any dinner with friends or family featured most of these norms. They were not, of course, the least bit demanding in time or effort. Preparation of a meal, indeed, took some time, setting of a simple table with 3-6 places took 10 minutes or far less [I had that job for years], the rest is just habit. I mostly eat in front of the tv by myself, of course. But all this comes back at need.
Making your own dinners at home a little more formal is a great way to learn to eat slower as well, which I have trouble with. Very nice video and you're very likeable yourself, bravo.
Uii... I really have to learn tabble maners. From time to time, I sit together with high management from very good local companies and I represent an high management too. I feel like a guy from the street. I just know some basics before.
I am very thankfull for that video.