Top Tools for the INFJ: Meditation Contemplation BEING in Nature Journaling Solitude Organizing and decluttering your life (Minimalism) Self Inquiry (Getting to the root of "Who am I?")
Thanks for the reminder! At times, I forget just how crucial these are for my emotional well-being. If I don’t have a good balance of these, I tend to go through bouts of depression and feel so out of wack.
This was incredibly timely. I'm 33 and spent the longest time trying to figure out just who I was and what the heck I wanted to do with my life. Meanwhile most of my friends were getting cool jobs and/or starting families, and while I was very happy for them, I kept feeling like I was missing out/something was wrong with me. It took me a very long time to realize all the things you talked about here. And just a few months ago I decided to take the plunge and turn one of my favorite hobbies, photography, into a career. I officially launched my business last week. I have no idea how it's going to go, but this is much more "me" than pretty much any other job I've had so far.
Thats amazing, congats. I hope you dont get discouraged. You have a steep learning curve ahead of you, but don't give up. Congrats again. If you have heard of master mind groups? I think one of the harder tasks for us to accomplish, meeting regularly with peers, but as a new business owner you cant afford not to have a support network. Exciting for you!
I was fortunate to find out that I was an INFJ at age 15 by reading the book Please Understand Me and taking the Myers-Briggs personality test. It was life-changing for me. I am called "weird" on a weekly basis, but have come to view it as a compliment and to think of it as "weird is different" in a good way. Great video.
I found out at 17 but I still am stuck inside my head at 23. I feel like I’m close to being able to start doing things with my life, but I hate that it takes this long because I’m always aware of how humans don’t really live that long, and that it’s harder to do things when you’re older. My limited time on this earth is always hanging over me like an axe ready to drop, and it makes me feel impatient and like I don’t want to waste any time, because you never know which day could be the last.
It's so absolutely true... There are so many times when I wonder who I really am? My personality seems to change so often (to me). I don't know who I should be and who I am... Not talking about career but character.
Bo, I quite love all your videos, but this one really touched me today. I'm 25, and working as a personal trainer in a commercial gym, though I really find it unsatisfying. I know I really want to work as a counselor or social worker for people with disabilities, and perhaps people in the criminal justice system. Helping people see what they're capable of is really meaningful for me. I've been out of school for over 3 years, having graduated with my psychology degree. And I'm itching to move on to the next phase of my life. I worry that, at 25, I'm wasting my life away, not being where I know I'm meant to be. But this video was deeply moving and helpful. Particularly the tip on making time our friend. I have grown quite a lot in the past few years, and I'm more confident than ever of what kind of impact I can make in people's lives. Thank you for making such touching and powerful content, Bo.
I am a therapist and a have a Master's in Social Work. I am a Licensed Independent Social-Clinical Practice and have a solo private practice with my own LLC. You should do what you! Go to school!!
@@monicasojka2738 thanks for sharing. I too am interested in exactly what you do. You haven't been hindered by the cost of advanced degrees? Do you recommend any grad schools, if you dont mind my asking?
@Paul, do have an art that you enjoy creating? For me, I dont mind part time or freelance work that pays the bills as long as I honor time for my creative outlets. Those may or may not generate income but balance is restored, which is the important thing. Anyway, 25 still fairly young! Best
@@coppersense999 I really like writing and music. I've been meaning to put more effort into my poetry, but finding the time is really challenging. I do think I will see great benefits in my quality of life if I set aside time each day to work on my poetry and short stories. Thank you for the suggestion. What are do you work on to release that creative side of you?
This is helping me to better under the ways of God. The Bible says he works in mysterious ways, plans for our future, and often doesn’t reveal a plan until it is time to take place. When God shows up in a situation, it often feels like it comes from out of nowhere just when you think he isn’t listening.
Good video, saved. I’m stuck in my head or looking at myself sometimes people can think I am too self centred. A friend once thought I didn’t like him anymore, he kept asking my friends around me but he never once asked me
Excellent advice! When I was younger, I would bail at the first hint of discomfort on trying new things outside my wheelhouse. Once I got some courage in that area, my life opened up like a lotus flower!
Hey Bo, about 6 months ago my boss had us take a personality test as sort of a team building exercise. I got INFJ, and ever since I’ve been following your channel trying to learn more about myself. Your videos have been extremely helpful, and I really appreciate the effort you put into them. Thank you!
Great advice and explaining! I’ve watched and enjoyed a lot of your videos. You’ve said you’re a teacher by profession and I can really see how you must excel at it with the kids too, just like you do in your videos.
Thank you for your efforts on mine and everyone’s behalf. You have definitely hit on a serious matter as it relates to “know thyself” as I was in my late 50’s when I learned I was an INFJ. Prior to that I struggled with many of the areas in my life which you address in your book which was also very helpful in learning about myself and why things were the way they were for me for far too long. Thank you again for shedding light on this as your work has been life changing for me. My best to you.
Found this video during my desperates researches. Kinda annoying how it describes perfectly a lot of things I'm confused about. This video is so helpful that I'm watching it again
Bo, Congratulations on your new baby! I also want to thank you for this video. I’m recently graduated from college and struggling a bit. This video was just what I needed to see. Thanks so much for all you do !
Bo Miller, I am reading your book. I am grateful for it and for your efforts. You are so smart and you are making a difference in my life. I can relate to the content , find similarities between your life stories and stories in my life. So many things are making so much sense for me. I would tell people I am not successful and they would feel/ think I am insane saying this. I would tell them I am afraid of success. I mean imperfect success. Your effort matter for real people, Bo. As an INFJ myself, this sentence would keep me doing my best , as I love others. You and your effort matter , you totally rock. Keep up with the great stuff. With love and appreciation.
Yes. They think I am learning unrelated subjects and working in unrelated careers, but I think you no it. All of those things are essential expertise needed the big picture of my future dream to co-operation with people improve their lives.
Bo, you always have great topics I can identify with. This topic opened my eyes to other people whom are INs, like my nephew. He is a INTJ (I think); recently he have done some mind-boggling things by displaying his intellectual knowledge and accomplishments, while being humble. When I look at him, now, I see a 'Walking Gift'. He is a blessing. Thanks for your informative insights. You are a wonderful and inspiring individual. Keep making these videos because they are valuable to us.
I am INFJ. I got catastrophizing and Obsessive thoughts. It is killing me. What should I do? I used to hate myself. I had no social life like others and my father is the "leader" personality so I thought there is me that's wrong. I didn't see my uniqueness. I started looking at my behavior patterns and trying to make them very extravert and cool. I was obsessive about it. I wanted to be extravert and thought it is possible by change. After 6 months I noticed that I have depression. Quick thought- I will be analyzing my mind to find my old me. It has lasted till now. I think think and can't stop- I know who I was/am but I don't feel ego- I don't feel me, I don't feel emotion. I still think and don't feel connection to reality. Please help if you can.
It seems that you were numbing yourself from the world because you didn't feel like you fit in. But you do! You are an unique person, embrace yourself. Take time to feel you, talk to yourself and do things that you like, because the time is your friend, and you will meet new friends. Sending to you all hope and love
Thanks .I have always felt not as good as others or been told I am 'too quiet and have really lost a sense of who I am naturally as have tried to change to become like others.i.e extroverts. This is great video and helps intj to know we are fine just the way we are 😊
But, but, but...I AM weird...and I'm ok with that. 🤪 Very insightful words, thanks for the post. I can relate quite well to your thoughts. Definitely been going through the identity crisis bit for a good while myself, but some more recent self-reflection has me headed in the right direction (I think?). 😃 Anyway, carry on and keep up the good work! ~Katy
i know who i am and how, but cant seem to grasp if i am mistyped or am infj with bad social skills and terrible empathy. i feel like a crazy alien at times :(i most times test as infj, but rarely as intj. i want to know which i am...though to be honest i feel infj, but do relate to intj traits.
Michael, I've been watching your videos for a while. I'm am a mature INTP. Of course, as an INTP I spend a lot of time studying the fascinating Jungian perspective on personality. This video makes points in an exceptional way I've not run across before. Keep growing and experimenting, please.
I dont know if I am an ISFP, or an INFP. Can you help me? When we answer the questions on S or N, I answer several of the traits for N. But when we look at the grey cup, I answer all the questions about defining the cup as grey, round, etc. But I dont define the grey cup with any of the N traits. This matters, because I'm either the Artist, or the Healer.
khorLDW I’m not completely certain, but I don’t think that was quite what he meant.... I think it is that as INFJ’s when we meet someone new, we are most likely to present our “second in command”-extroverted Feeling (Fe) up front personality wise, to meet them--not our “first in command”-introverted intuition (Ni).
Hi Bo, loved your video. I guess I'll give myself some grace today. I am 55 and still don't know what to do with my life for a career and that bothers me. I have a chronic illness, so am very limited in what I can do, but I would like to try to do something to earn money. I'm fortunate in that my husband earns enough for us to live on so I don't HAVE to earn, I just want to. Have thought about TH-cam and Udemy for possible income. Thanks for listing the gear and software you use. I am thinking about trying Camtasia. Have you tried that or heard of anyone who has? I'm on a Mac. But I'm not sure what I would teach! Most of my life has been a spiritual quest. Your video speaks right to my core! I have enjoyed learning a lot of different things over the years. I especially enjoy working with my computer to make media productions: movies, CDs, etc.
Comgrats Bo on baby #2. INFJ parenting, Mom versus Dad, there's a topic. Lol reporting directly from the frontlines! Naw, I have a suspician you make a great dad, no further explanation needed. Congrats to you and your wife. Not now, obviously, but hopefully soon you can introduce everybody to Mrs here on YT, maybe do a video version of your "how we met" podcast. She's funny! Anyway, take care.
I'm greatful 4 this video ive been having identify crises lately. For the past 1year i thought it would be better for me to live VANLIFE. Nope it's not good for me, needless to say I miss my apt.. i never have lone time...
I don't understand myself. My parents don't understand me. My brother don't understand me. Nobody understands me. Nobody including me, don't understand why i do some of the things I do.. 😭 n its scary when i can relate to the Joker.
I was diagnosed with INFJ and am so painfully shy and introverted that in spite of being able to talk to people at times I want to kill myself because of being so uncomfortable around people sometimes . I always feel misunderstood because there are not that many INFJ's around for me to talk to and relate to. Because of this I really wish that I would die.
Marti Grant PLEASE know that you do not need to find another INFJ to talk to-although it often helps to find another intuitive (an ENxx or an INxx) to relate to more easily. AND that INFJ is NOT a “diagnosis” it is not an illness or disease!... but simply a way to understand people’s preferences in their inner and outer worlds. Bo has some good videos about things that may cause INFJ stress, and what is most likely to be helpful to address it. Subscribe to his channel and listen to them for some starting points and put some into practice. There are small ways to connect to yourself and with others that are not too overwhelming.... please know that you have value and worth and deserve to treat yourself well even if others you currently know are not. There are good thing to be had and to give in life. You did not give your age, but Do not trade life in early for death. This from a 64 yr old INFJ nurse who was struck by what you commented. I wish you the best.
"You're not weird" Well, you're pretty rare, and your openness to ideas may mean you are a step or two ahead of the crowd. So... in a sense, you might be weird, but that isn't a bad thing.
Top Tools for the INFJ:
Meditation
Contemplation
BEING in Nature
Journaling
Solitude
Organizing and decluttering your life (Minimalism)
Self Inquiry (Getting to the root of "Who am I?")
Yes!
Thanks for the reminder! At times, I forget just how crucial these are for my emotional well-being. If I don’t have a good balance of these, I tend to go through bouts of depression and feel so out of wack.
Spot on. I am Grateful for you sharing this.
And pray
Sahil Pandit agreed
This was incredibly timely. I'm 33 and spent the longest time trying to figure out just who I was and what the heck I wanted to do with my life. Meanwhile most of my friends were getting cool jobs and/or starting families, and while I was very happy for them, I kept feeling like I was missing out/something was wrong with me. It took me a very long time to realize all the things you talked about here. And just a few months ago I decided to take the plunge and turn one of my favorite hobbies, photography, into a career. I officially launched my business last week. I have no idea how it's going to go, but this is much more "me" than pretty much any other job I've had so far.
Thats amazing, congats. I hope you dont get discouraged. You have a steep learning curve ahead of you, but don't give up. Congrats again. If you have heard of master mind groups? I think one of the harder tasks for us to accomplish, meeting regularly with peers, but as a new business owner you cant afford not to have a support network. Exciting for you!
I'm 33 too. Feel you.
So happy for you! Good luck on your new endeavor.
@@sharonjessen Thank you! :)
livingandthriving good Luck!
I was fortunate to find out that I was an INFJ at age 15 by reading the book Please Understand Me and taking the Myers-Briggs personality test. It was life-changing for me. I am called "weird" on a weekly basis, but have come to view it as a compliment and to think of it as "weird is different" in a good way. Great video.
Thanks Jill for the book referral- Please Understand Me..Iv'e just downloaded it. I so wish I had that book at 15!
@@rickcunneen1658 I had to replace my book several years ago because EVERY page was loose from the binding from so much use over the years. LOL
I found out at 17 but I still am stuck inside my head at 23. I feel like I’m close to being able to start doing things with my life, but I hate that it takes this long because I’m always aware of how humans don’t really live that long, and that it’s harder to do things when you’re older. My limited time on this earth is always hanging over me like an axe ready to drop, and it makes me feel impatient and like I don’t want to waste any time, because you never know which day could be the last.
It's so absolutely true...
There are so many times when I wonder who I really am? My personality seems to change so often (to me). I don't know who I should be and who I am... Not talking about career but character.
Bo, I quite love all your videos, but this one really touched me today. I'm 25, and working as a personal trainer in a commercial gym, though I really find it unsatisfying. I know I really want to work as a counselor or social worker for people with disabilities, and perhaps people in the criminal justice system. Helping people see what they're capable of is really meaningful for me.
I've been out of school for over 3 years, having graduated with my psychology degree. And I'm itching to move on to the next phase of my life. I worry that, at 25, I'm wasting my life away, not being where I know I'm meant to be.
But this video was deeply moving and helpful. Particularly the tip on making time our friend. I have grown quite a lot in the past few years, and I'm more confident than ever of what kind of impact I can make in people's lives.
Thank you for making such touching and powerful content, Bo.
I am a therapist and a have a Master's in Social Work. I am a Licensed Independent Social-Clinical Practice and have a solo private practice with my own LLC. You should do what you! Go to school!!
@@monicasojka2738 That's the hope! Thank you for the encouragement.
@@monicasojka2738 thanks for sharing. I too am interested in exactly what you do. You haven't been hindered by the cost of advanced degrees? Do you recommend any grad schools, if you dont mind my asking?
@Paul, do have an art that you enjoy creating? For me, I dont mind part time or freelance work that pays the bills as long as I honor time for my creative outlets. Those may or may not generate income but balance is restored, which is the important thing. Anyway, 25 still fairly young! Best
@@coppersense999 I really like writing and music. I've been meaning to put more effort into my poetry, but finding the time is really challenging. I do think I will see great benefits in my quality of life if I set aside time each day to work on my poetry and short stories. Thank you for the suggestion. What are do you work on to release that creative side of you?
This was so encouraging. I am a later bloomer as you mentioned.
😅
This is helping me to better under the ways of God. The Bible says he works in mysterious ways, plans for our future, and often doesn’t reveal a plan until it is time to take place. When God shows up in a situation, it often feels like it comes from out of nowhere just when you think he isn’t listening.
Good video, saved. I’m stuck in my head or looking at myself sometimes people can think I am too self centred. A friend once thought I didn’t like him anymore, he kept asking my friends around me but he never once asked me
Excellent advice! When I was younger, I would bail at the first hint of discomfort on trying new things outside my wheelhouse. Once I got some courage in that area, my life opened up like a lotus flower!
You had me glued straight away. This is a lovely description, thank you!
Thanks Bo for reminding us we aren't weird, messed up or broken :) Have a wonderful New Year!
Hey Bo, about 6 months ago my boss had us take a personality test as sort of a team building exercise. I got INFJ, and ever since I’ve been following your channel trying to learn more about myself. Your videos have been extremely helpful, and I really appreciate the effort you put into them. Thank you!
I'm going through this right now. I really appreciate this so much!
Great advice and explaining! I’ve watched and enjoyed a lot of your videos. You’ve said you’re a teacher by profession and I can really see how you must excel at it with the kids too, just like you do in your videos.
Thanks! I appreciate your encouraging words. :-)
Thank you for your efforts on mine and everyone’s behalf.
You have definitely hit on a serious matter as it relates to “know thyself” as I was in my late 50’s when I learned I was an INFJ.
Prior to that I struggled with many of the areas in my life which you address in your book which was also very helpful in learning about myself and why things were the way they were for me for far too long.
Thank you again for shedding light on this as your work has been life changing for me. My best to you.
Thanks, Bo! I like your counsel of letting time be our friend and not feel hurried while we learn about who we are. Congrats on your new little one!
Found this video during my desperates researches. Kinda annoying how it describes perfectly a lot of things I'm confused about. This video is so helpful that I'm watching it again
Bo,
Congratulations on your new baby! I also want to thank you for this video. I’m recently graduated from college and struggling a bit. This video was just what I needed to see. Thanks so much for all you do !
Bo Miller, I am reading your book. I am grateful for it and for your efforts. You are so smart and you are making a difference in my life. I can relate to the content , find similarities between your life stories and stories in my life. So many things are making so much sense for me. I would tell people I am not successful and they would feel/ think I am insane saying this. I would tell them I am afraid of success. I mean imperfect success. Your effort matter for real people, Bo. As an INFJ myself, this sentence would keep me doing my best , as I love others.
You and your effort matter , you totally rock. Keep up with the great stuff. With love and appreciation.
Yes. They think I am learning unrelated subjects and working in unrelated careers, but I think you no it. All of those things are essential expertise needed the big picture of my future dream to co-operation with people improve their lives.
Bo, you always have great topics I can identify with. This topic opened my eyes to other people whom are INs, like my nephew. He is a INTJ (I think); recently he have done some mind-boggling things by displaying his intellectual knowledge and accomplishments, while being humble. When I look at him, now, I see a 'Walking Gift'. He is a blessing. Thanks for your informative insights. You are a wonderful and inspiring individual. Keep making these videos because they are valuable to us.
I am INFJ. I got catastrophizing and Obsessive thoughts. It is killing me. What should I do?
I used to hate myself. I had no social life like others and my father is the "leader" personality so I thought there is me that's wrong. I didn't see my uniqueness. I started looking at my behavior patterns and trying to make them very extravert and cool. I was obsessive about it. I wanted to be extravert and thought it is possible by change. After 6 months I noticed that I have depression. Quick thought- I will be analyzing my mind to find my old me. It has lasted till now. I think think and can't stop- I know who I was/am but I don't feel ego- I don't feel me, I don't feel emotion. I still think and don't feel connection to reality. Please help if you can.
It seems that you were numbing yourself from the world because you didn't feel like you fit in. But you do! You are an unique person, embrace yourself. Take time to feel you, talk to yourself and do things that you like, because the time is your friend, and you will meet new friends. Sending to you all hope and love
I will play this everything time I feel myself losing faith.
Thanks .I have always felt not as good as others or been told I am 'too quiet and have really lost a sense of who I am naturally as have tried to change to become like others.i.e extroverts. This is great video and helps intj to know we are fine just the way we are 😊
Thanks for the video this is really helpful for me😊
My family treats me like im not good enough which now i see that with my own eyes im not even good enough for myself. Thnx.
Really interesting & insightful.. Always enjoy your videos Bo- Thanks for sharing your sage advice!
I am greatful for this site because it has helped me to understand myself better.
But, but, but...I AM weird...and I'm ok with that. 🤪
Very insightful words, thanks for the post. I can relate quite well to your thoughts. Definitely been going through the identity crisis bit for a good while myself, but some more recent self-reflection has me headed in the right direction (I think?). 😃
Anyway, carry on and keep up the good work!
~Katy
thank god your channel exists.
Thank you ❤️💯
I like this. He is an INFJp, giving 'INFJ advice to INFJs
i know who i am and how, but cant seem to grasp if i am mistyped or am infj with bad social skills and terrible empathy. i feel like a crazy alien at times :(i most times test as infj, but rarely as intj. i want to know which i am...though to be honest i feel infj, but do relate to intj traits.
Great video. Isn't it any data or opinions on INFJ's and marijuana? With or without. Good or bad. Helps or hurt?
That was great advice. A big take away is to give my self some grace
Thankful ❤️
Thank you 🙏
Michael, I've been watching your videos for a while. I'm am a mature INTP. Of course, as an INTP I spend a lot of time studying the fascinating Jungian perspective on personality. This video makes points in an exceptional way I've not run across before. Keep growing and experimenting, please.
I dont know if I am an ISFP, or an INFP. Can you help me? When we answer the questions on S or N, I answer several of the traits for N. But when we look at the grey cup, I answer all the questions about defining the cup as grey, round, etc. But I dont define the grey cup with any of the N traits. This matters, because I'm either the Artist, or the Healer.
Why no more videos? Is there any way to contact you?
Thank you for your amazing videos!
I was literally thinking about vice-'s yesterday how they are probaly more introverts than chairs/presidents.
khorLDW I’m not completely certain, but I don’t think that was quite what he meant.... I think it is that as INFJ’s when we meet someone new, we are most likely to present our “second in command”-extroverted Feeling (Fe) up front personality wise, to meet them--not our “first in command”-introverted intuition (Ni).
Hi Bo, loved your video. I guess I'll give myself some grace today. I am 55 and still don't know what to do with my life for a career and that bothers me. I have a chronic illness, so am very limited in what I can do, but I would like to try to do something to earn money. I'm fortunate in that my husband earns enough for us to live on so I don't HAVE to earn, I just want to. Have thought about TH-cam and Udemy for possible income. Thanks for listing the gear and software you use. I am thinking about trying Camtasia. Have you tried that or heard of anyone who has? I'm on a Mac. But I'm not sure what I would teach! Most of my life has been a spiritual quest. Your video speaks right to my core! I have enjoyed learning a lot of different things over the years. I especially enjoy working with my computer to make media productions: movies, CDs, etc.
Dont feel limited! Try and see before you make a judgement, you might see that your illness wont matter as much if you love what you're doing
I'm a new fan and loving this. Thanks for the vid Bo. Keep it up!
Comgrats Bo on baby #2. INFJ parenting, Mom versus Dad, there's a topic. Lol reporting directly from the frontlines! Naw, I have a suspician you make a great dad, no further explanation needed. Congrats to you and your wife.
Not now, obviously, but hopefully soon you can introduce everybody to Mrs here on YT, maybe do a video version of your "how we met" podcast. She's funny! Anyway, take care.
I'm greatful 4 this video ive been having identify crises lately. For the past 1year i thought it would be better for me to live VANLIFE. Nope it's not good for me, needless to say I miss my apt.. i never have lone time...
Very helpful. Thank you. 🙏
that video was very interesting thanks Bro for ur effort
I don't understand myself. My parents don't understand me. My brother don't understand me. Nobody understands me. Nobody including me, don't understand why i do some of the things I do.. 😭 n its scary when i can relate to the Joker.
I was diagnosed with INFJ and am so painfully shy and introverted that in spite of being able to talk to people at times I want to kill myself because of being so uncomfortable around people sometimes . I always feel misunderstood because there are not that many INFJ's around for me to talk to and relate to. Because of this I really wish that I would die.
Marti Grant PLEASE know that you do not need to find another INFJ to talk to-although it often helps to find another intuitive (an ENxx or an INxx) to relate to more easily. AND that INFJ is NOT a “diagnosis” it is not an illness or disease!... but simply a way to understand people’s preferences in their inner and outer worlds. Bo has some good videos about things that may cause INFJ stress, and what is most likely to be helpful to address it. Subscribe to his channel and listen to them for some starting points and put some into practice. There are small ways to connect to yourself and with others that are not too overwhelming.... please know that you have value and worth and deserve to treat yourself well even if others you currently know are not. There are good thing to be had and to give in life. You did not give your age, but Do not trade life in early for death.
This from a 64 yr old INFJ nurse who was struck by what you commented. I wish you the best.
Is there an on-line test for this I could try?
500th Like, right here bro! :D
Thank you.
Thank you
"You're not weird"
Well, you're pretty rare, and your openness to ideas may mean you are a step or two ahead of the crowd. So... in a sense, you might be weird, but that isn't a bad thing.
💯💯💯
man your my fav
Attention all INFJS please search "Sadhguru" on TH-cam, I promise you won't regret it, Peace;)
4
👍🏽keep going
Thank you❤️❤️
Thank you.