How Do I Get Him To Tell Me Everything? || STEVE HARVEY
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 20 เม.ย. 2016
- With an audience full of women wanting to know how they can get their man to “man up” in the relationship, Steve has assembled a panel of six men ready to weigh in with real answers to the women’s questions.
You won’t want to miss the men’s candid opinions on topics like “How do I get him to be 100% honest?” and “How do I get him to share his feelings?”
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I once heard a comedian say this about men and women after work...... "The woman wants to come home and explain in detail every minute of her day, especially that one co worker who really grinds her gears, and she won't stop until it's all out of her system" "The man however, wants to come home, crack a drink open, turn on the tv, and just bask in the fact he has returned to his home, leaving the rest of the world behind. Conversating about it, only keeps the workday going."
Wolf Knight right tho
stfu
Preach it!
It's true. And the man keeping quiet about the details of his day isn't him hiding anything, it's simply him not wanting to dwell on every last thing...assuming it's anything he bothered to remember.
Me personally, I have a tendency to suck at telling stories about something that happened in a way that makes sense or is interesting, so I tend to not say anything until I have some idea of what I want to say.
My partner must be more of a woman then because he'll tell me everything about his day and gossips about co-workers after a few drinks.
Happened to my husband. A girl he dated way back added him in facebook. He offered the information and I didnt get angry. He just rejected it and went on his day. Had she sent him a message, he said he just wouldnt reply.
No need to invite temptation into your marriage.
Maylyn Bayani that’s the difference between your good man and the one in question. He engaged in conversation with the ex....
Exactly
Agreed 100%! It's not necessary. That should be decided before people get married :)
temptation? Is that how you see exes?
@@snuffeldjuret projection
Texting your ex while you're married.. I don't think that's ok and unnecessary
Its just texting? He has every right to text? There’s no actual proof that they “doing” anything is there?
I agree my ex is my ex for a reason. I got a good woman now why do I need her
Adi Da Gamer why are you communicating with your ex in the first place? And why would you hide this fact and try to justify it? That comes off all as fishy.
buddyman84 because then the women would destroy the man verbally
@@adi14293 why would you do that tho. put it how ever you want but its not okay to have contact with past romances without the knowledge of your current SO
If an ex were to text a woman that's in a relationship and she not tell her partner, the partner would automatically assume the worst.
Keep it real!!
Most men don’t care about emotional intimacy according to psych. If you have physical intimacy with another man that’s what we tend to care about most. Vice Versa for women if those studies are reliable.
I agree with Steve, you cannot tell EVERYTHING. Some things are not worth the drama,
3 marriages later I betcha Steve don't tell his woman nothing!
it's his ex he can do whatever he wants it's his business
Kitso Ntuli Exactly, I agree. I disagree with the whole not telling someone something is basically lying. No it isn't.
full agree, not worth it.
It's not even about avoiding drama sometimes. Like a couple of those guys said, it's literally impossible to share every last detail of your day. An ex contacting you is definitely the type of thing a person likely shouldn't hesitate to share, but documenting every last step and every last breath and every last word you uttered to every last person you encountered just doesnt happen. And a guy isn't necessarily going to volunteer details of his day, not because he's hiding it from his girl but simply because he genuinely believes certain things aren't a big deal - like which checkout aisle he went to at the grocery store, the bread he thought about getting but decided not to, etc. If you ask him about things and refuses to say that's one thing, but him not volunteering trivial information is in no way the same as intentional deception.
"I'm sorry. is she still standing there?" lol😂🙌🏽
😂😂😂😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁
😭😭😭🌚😂
🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆
Communicating regularly with an ex is not the same as someone staring at you in public or offering to carry groceries.
it was about "I want him to tell me everything". Everything is included in everything.
Not necessarily. Aguy has a right to female friends. A chick has a right to male friends.
Why are u in that marriage anyway if he isn't your best friend. Better get out if ur not happy. That's what I did.
@@FrauIndian no. If ur married, it has to stop. Friends should be met when ur together as a couple,not when ur alone. If ur married happily, your single days are over. That's my idea.
@@pristinebeach2630 that’s why u don’t understand society.
I usually 100% agree with Steve. But this instance I feel all the men on the stage were dancing "around the issue/question"
I think in a close relationship/marriage it's important to be respectful and know where you line boundaries is, every relationship is different.
Talk openly and honestly with your partner so you can both make respectable decisions or actions keeping each other in mind.
Steve I agree with you 98% of the time. This is a wife NOT girlfriend. He is a married man. The advice should have been. The husband should have said, he is in a committed MARRIED relationship. Then delete and block her & the email from facebook.
Steve, NO need to have that door open for TEMPTATION. She is an "EX" for a reason
100%....Wife not girlfriend.
98% of the time he gives advise to others.
Very TRUE.
Pure Joy N Love the wife did not say what the convo was about. If it was and inappropriate conversation then she has all means to be mad but she's wasn't mad about anything because the convo was harmless. The issue is simply that she messaged and that message could be just "hi" "bye". When you marry someone it doesn't mean they stop talking to other people. If you trust your partner or if you're confident, that doesn't bother you. If they start communicating too often then you tell him it has to stop. Men do view the same as women. If it wasn't worth talking about he probably won't mention it. He didn't see it necessary. What was he to say "hey my ex contacted me on Facebook, just wanted to let you know". Doesn't it now mean he continue to speak to her or does it mean he stop, he told you...that's all that was important right, well know you know.
completely agree with you jenny and Pure Joy, this is disgraceful, the advise given is tasteless far from a biblical/traditional marriage, I would even be weary if the person I was dating was behaving this way, let alone a Husband, she has every right to know what is happening between the ex and her husband.
she probably reacts badly to the truths but demands to know everything.
But that's just an assumption you made without even knowing her, she could be the opposite as well and he can still be not telling her jack
She has every right to react badly.
You mean like most women? :P
Yes I got that vibe about her
@@kierragrant4291 I received a similar vibe to. She seems to exaggerate things. Such as him not telling her that being a lie. Then she kept digging in the story with Steve and he had to hint to her to sit down because she didn't want to let it go. She needs a little therapy.
My husband told me everything over the course of a year when we first married. I love our transparency and we have joint passwords and access and take care of each other. I tell him everything and it’s great. The feeling of love and trust does exist to some couples. His parents are that way and are happily married for 61 years.
Wish to find a man like that
Galfriend could allow me to clone him!😊you have something special there ❤️
Trust is everything in a relationship. And you build trust by not hiding secrets. Sharing is caring. Yes it can create some short term drama but it deepens the trust in each other for the long term.
@@musunganatalie5085 ha! Hugs I pray you are blessed to find a good man. My bro-in-law just got married in his 50’s and had his first baby. they are definitely old-school. I wish more younger men would be like that. I see a few around so that’s promising.
Coz ur partner is open minded
It’s called “lying by omission”. For me personally I am less likely to have feelings about something if you just tell me that it happened but when you decide to not tell me and I inevitably find out later, I am absolutely not going to react well. When you omit things it makes them seem more significant than they might actually be.
Frankly my husband talking to his ex would be a non issue, until he omitted it.
Its not lying by omission he just didn’t tell her
Kym Kiswe idk why that is so hard for people to understand. I don’t think they even know the definition of “lying”.
U must not have dealt with a person that overly reacts ?...not everybody takes voluntary information as well as others is what Steve was trying to say. The guy may have been hit before or verbally accused just by being forth coming. U will hesitate to repeat to avoid such actions. I wish people would stop saying hey if u tell me ill respect u more...when too be honest depending on the person or situation it can still end badly...witnessed this too many times.
I define lying by omission as your guy met up with a friend after work but omitted the friend was a ex girlfriend. Not telling you he met up with anyone is just not telling you
Social media is the devil that breaks up happy homes. There is always that guy or girl who is gonna put something in your inbox regardless of your situation, so the best thing to do is get off of social media and enjoy your wife,husband,boyfriend or girlfriend.
+dmsrt8 I don't think social media is the devil, it's a non-human thing. People are evil, not things. But i do agree that people can use things for dangerous purposes. My bf and myself choose to get off social media. And life is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH BETTER. Phones, texts, email, social media makes it a lot easier to cheat in 2016 that ever before. It's sad, bc I believe in love, and i hardly see it in this generation. Unlike my grandparents generation where there was more love, and less cheating going on.
it's not social media, it's the lack of commitment people have today. Marriage is nothing more than a piece of paper to some folks so they don't honor their marriage vows.
It's the people behind the social media accounts.
Could a parked car run someone over? No.
Same thing
Or don't respond.
@Thelondonbadger Exactly
I don't think her husband is cheating because the wife had easy access to even SEE the conversation between him and his ex. If the husband was untrustworthy or really hiding something he would have done something to his account to prevent the wife from seeing the conversation, like change passwords or even delete the conversation. Both things could be easily done....
Debbie B U got it
You definitely have a point. My sorry ass ex deleted conversations and had the nerve to say he can do whatever he wants with his phone. Boy bye!
Or my boy got caught lacking
Exactly she just has a dumb one lol she didn’t set exact boundaries I’m guessing messaging peers is in the norm for them both.
YUP.
Not telling somebody stuff intentionally is called, "withholding information".
That's not lying. It's only lying when the person is asked about that information and denies it.
Secrets in a marriege is bad. It's lack of trust.
Everybody has secrets. Everybody.
@ And? Theres a difference between intentional secrets and unintentional ones.
@@orlando1145 yeah women misunderstand the concept of unintentional secrets
Luck of trust, then no thrust
One important trait is really honesty. It's one reason I left my former husband. He lied to me from the beginning. Im learning from this show. Thanks to the great man aside from Steve who spoke about honesty.
Im sorry what in the hell does Adam have on is head???? IS that hair style legal?
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
How did he get married?
lol
😅😅😅😅😅😅😂😂😂
I laughed so hard at ur comment! 😂
"how do i get him to tell me everything?"
alcohol, lots of alcohol
That's funny
The best 👌 advice
True. Booze is a man's kryptonite
True
This made me laugh for real
No one nailed the point i wanted to hear. It's the women's intuition. Never leave your women in a state of "Uninformed". DAMN I WISH I WAS ANSWERING THAT QUESTION
It's better to be alone to avoid questioning what he's doing every now and then lol
She stood there looking for Steve to tell her what she wants to hear!😂
She shd have known he wd lie, 4 marriages.
From the start of her question I was thinking no man is gonna bring something up knowing that it will start a fight. However, if he did share it first, she wouldnt be so upset about finding out herself. I totally get that. But avoiding a fight is the reason for not sharing.
not saying anything is not the same as lying
lieing is not telling the truth if you didnt say anything its not a lie its nothing
Are you dumb? If your spouse cheats, that's called cheating not lying. If you your spouse cheats, you ask if they are cheating, and they say no, that's a lie.
Back to kindergarten with you to learn what a lie is.
Exactly man. How can you lie if no words come out of your mouth?
I think the term is lying by omission. It's a legal thing
Special I've heard of this. But if the basis of it starts on nothing, then what was omitted? If someone asks, and no response is made at all, then you haven't omitted something you just opt to not respond. In legal cases though, If someone doesn't answer a question that is asked, then it is a lie by omission because you are under oath to tell the truth to what ever legal question is asked.
People can't handle 100% of the truth all the time. You gotta now what's worth bringing up, and what minor and can be left out to avoid unwanted drama in your life.
having conact to your ex flame is not minor tho
Hooking up with your ex on line is not one of those. However, the key is called delete unfriend her bef you wreck.
If the shoe was on the other foot, secret chats with an old boyfriend, watch out.
I didn’t like how her issue was made to seem like it was petty, I’m sure none of those men would like their WIFE (key word) communicating with an ex.
Women need to start doing these men exactly the same. Treat others as you wish to be treated. And men want to be treated the same give it to them.
@@boundariessetinstone5893 then theres going to be alot of single women out here
TruthSeeker 86 So be it no one ever died from being single and content. 😎
@@daniellemccarter5706 then how come there are so many women talking about where have all the good men gone?
They said that trust is part of a good relationship. If their wives are talking to an ex but then that's as far as it goes then more than likely they won't care to much.
Well if the shoe was on the other foot how would her husband feel knowing his wife was talking to an ex?
Exactly
YES! Some men are too dense to be able to empathize about a situation. They will never "get it" unless they are personally affected or harmed in some way.
I know a wife whose husband posted XXX rated girl posters in obvious places in their home, where visiting guests and even young children could see. She begged him to take them down and he refused, stating "this is MY house and I will decorate it how I want".
So she waited until he was scheduled to have guests over. Imagine their surprise when they saw XXX rated posters of MEN, with much larger equipment than his, posted all over the house...
The nude posters vanished, all of them...
Hunnnnnneeeeeeyyyyy🤔🤨
In my experience, People should just not talk to or have contact with exes while in relationships. Unless there are kids involved. But Ive been in this situation multiple times and it never ended well. On either side.
Not for nothing I have talked to an ex on Facebook. She told me she was getting married and we just caught up. There was no evil intentions in the conversation. If my wife talks to people in the past so what.
These petty conversations can be eliminated if their is mutual trust. My wife was a stripper in college and I dont feel threatened.
I am very open minded there too many of these rules that don't make sense
Its called trust either you trust me, or you dont; plain, and simple.
Preach.
Trust is earned. He violated her trust therefore he isn't trust worthy.
Well if your girlfriend was txting or Facebook messaging her ex you would be ok with that ?
+Monae Jones hell yea, if she texting her ex thats nothing but if she does something with them then thats something els and she aint worth my time.. Simple..
Ace Vers
The way you react to how your significant other tells you things is what determines whether your significant other will tell you things from then on.
Omgggg this is the type of convo that makes you wanna jump in and say something. I’m 22 female and you got me damned if I’d want to know EVERY thing and would tell everything to my significant other.
there is a big difference between a guy checking you out at the gym and your EX, I repeat EX, chatting with you on Facebook. just saying.
What's wrong with chatting with an ex? I do it all the time with mine. Our love relationshp is over, we've both moved on, but we've become very good friends cause we acknowledge the good qualities in each other, we know each other more accurately than anyone else, we support and advise each other, we care for each other, it absolutely doesn't mean we're sexually attracted to each other.
Only an insecure person worries about being replaced, which _both_ your examples demonstrate. I still talk to my ex. My wife talks to her, too.
Vasil Svopopoulos According to psychology, a person who is insecure about being replaced is probably neurotic. A person who is not neurotic is almost definitely a narcissist (or worse, perhaps a sociopath). I'm not saying that there's something wrong with chatting to an ex. This is OK. But I want my partner to be a little concerned, because it means that she has not taken me for granted. But I want her to be strong enough to not allow her concern to turn into paranoia. I want just enough concern so that she keeps trying in our relationship and engages in strategies to strengthen it so that she has nothing to fear in me talking to an ex.
Amaravi lookup the term "monkeybranching" (aka, hypergamy). The problem is there are uneven consequences. When a man replaces a woman, she punishes him with the system (alimony, child support, public slander and libel with backup). When a woman replaces a man, there are no punishments for her.
Vasil Svolopoulos That may be true in many cases, but it is irrelevant to this discussion because we're not talking about an actual desire to replace her. We're talking about how she responds to finding out about her man innocently talking to his ex.
Not oversharing (as she herself called it!) is somehow lying??? When did he lie? So he went to the store and *didn't* tell you how long it took to get there in traffic, the price of everything in the store, how long he stood in line at the register. Where's the lie???
Ladies, yall really feel like this? Just cause men don't share every second of our day we're lying???
+Art by Atlas No, all women do not share these feelings, because to me a lie is intentional deception. The problem this woman is facing in her relationship is not failing to under/overshare, it is the fact that her husband is communicating with his EX and is failing to acknowledge how that is hurting his wife. The fact that he is so okay with this is cause for concern. I wish she could have articulated this. Steve and his panel could have provided better advice and she could have left with the feeling that she'd actually been heard and helped.
+TooCute1890 I totally get what you're saying (and you said it clearer than she did); she should have told this to her man, not asking Steve and them. :P
Art by Atlas no, not all women. Dont put us all together. That woman has more than one reason not to trust that particular man. I do not question what my man is doing all day and thats called trust. She aint got it!
JulySummers you worded that perfectly
All of you all here have valid opinions. She is more upset about him talking to the ex itself than him not telling her. Why does she need to know that? If she read the messages and they are innocent, why care? No her husband is going to feel like trapped and on egg shells. Oh brother .
"aaaand shes still standing..." Steve you keep it real and crack me up 😂
Mr. Steve Harvey, you are smart, intelligent, and when I watch your videos I am always laughing. You have that something no other man has. You are down to earth, humble ansd lovable person. God Bless you.
Steve that is not good advice. I had a guy who was open and told me straight what the women did. He ignored her efforts not entertaining her advances. The more you communicate the more a door can open.
Michelle Samuels YESSS!!
Michelle Samuels
No it may not be good advice for YOU, but for someone else it is. If you know your partner likes to blow things out of proportion, then telling them about someone flirting with them wouldn’t help the situation.
Was the random FB girl mentioned in the video trying to put forth "advances" on the married guy, though? Or were they just still friends having a quick conversation every now and then that had nothing attached to it? I get the feeling even if the entire situation/conversation was "How are you? How are your kids and new husband? That's great! Talk to you again in 6 months!" you would probably still think it's horrible and the guy is a terrible person.
DozenMarks I agree. Just having a simple conversation like what you describe for example with an ex IS NOT EVER a (reasonable) problem in and of itself.. If you are concerned on if he is talking appropriately to that ex, that’s really an issue of trust between you two. If it is a particular ex you don’t like for whatever reason, you have a problem with the ex’s past behavior/you might be making assumptions of the ex’s intentions based off the stories he’s told you before. Etc.
DozenMarks hate to burst your bubble but that innocent “6 month checking in” is keeping a tethered line to your ex just in case. That’s all it is. If you’re in a solid marriage why are you “checking on” another adult you USED to be with when you should be focusing on your partner and your own life.
Steve always has that funny wisdom but hits right at the target.
This is how I see sharing.
If it effects the relationship, share.
If it's nothing and it doesn't effect the relationship, it's not worth the drama or time.
The PANEL didn't help her at all!
Yeah they did. They told her that she and him by extension don't have to tell each other every single possible thing that happened in their lives in order for trust to exist between them. How does not mentioning if someone looked at one of them while he/she were at the gym become dishonest? My own interpretation is that she's insecure which is why she equates omission to lying.
they didn't help because they can't help her. She's not going to listen to what she doesn't want to hear. What they should have told her was that she needs to stop being so controlling. When she said " I EXPECT the same in return" she gave it away
@@salma_Nella22 she's not his mother
Marren Rue exactly. She doesn’t want to accept that he’s his own individual. As long as there are boundaries set she should trust him to do what he does. And I agree with one of the men, it’s impossible to share everything, nor is it healthy. If couples want to tell each other everything that’s on them. That is a unique situation should that remain consistent. But people these days want partners, but they still want to feel like they’re in control of their own lives. And that is why trust is so important. If you lose trust, the remainder of the relationship will always feel like a job rather than a relationship
They did help, she just didn't hear what she wanted to hear. She wanted them to agree with her mindset and say "yeah he's wrong". lol
"I'm sorry. Is she still standing?" 😂😂😂
not telling you everything is not the same as lying
You are right. If a woman is talking back with a man at work who is flirting with her or on FB, she doesn't tell her husband then it's NOT the same as lying.
You are right, same as what the guys say his wife doesn't need to tell him about all the guys flirting with her or her flirting back.
That's what the husband did, if thats not lying, then same for wife, is not lying either :-)
Bunny Cheeks
Yes it’s not lying. If he asks and she says she’s not doing it, THEN it’s lying.
Actually it is! It's called lying by omission and it holds weight in court.
thrilla72
Yes when a crime is committed. That’s considered withholding information that can solve a case. For example, if you saw someone being murdered and you didn’t tell the police it’s considered lying by omission. But those are specific scenarios.
So if I eat a burrito today and I don’t tell my wife, I should be held accountable in court for “lying by omission?”
Emmanuel Nwufo Omission is lies
Steve you're absolutely amazing! Thank you for this video! 😆👍
TRUST IS EXTREMELY IMPORTANT IN A RELATIONSHIP!!❤❤
Not tellin sum1 sumthin is not tha same as lyin
I was so embarrassed when she said that.... I dont know another woman who agrees with that. Lying is lying. Not withholding info from her nosy ass
+Baby Muva You about the only woman I've known of who believes that, good for you! That's realistic thinking!
+Baby Muva I agree with you sister! Some women really over do it with that type of thing. I can understand if it's something important that he keeps from you but how can not saying something be lying lol.
so witholding the fact that he is cheating on you is not lying? the point is the truth is, there's no half truth, once part of the truth is witheld it becomes deception and a lie, it ceases to be the truth. but I do agree that it's unrealistic for us to tell everything.
but your main issue is that he's cheating, not the fact that he's lying... you be just as pissed if he told you he was cheating
I tried the honesty tell her everything approach. I learned after a while that she holds on to every word and holds a grudge. Sometimes, things going on in your head are best kept there. Its not worth the stress...
All the power to Steve. Hit the nail on the head.
I love ur channel a lot steve. I found ur channel few weeks ago... Due to the corona pandemic i've spent my plenty of time on ur channel... It's so fun and i got a lot of information.. Thanks so much my idol
I'm married and I 100% disagree. My husband and I really to tell each other everything. He tells me things without me even asking. It can be done! 😁 I believe it comes down to the level of respect you have for each other
I know. True. If you didn't make a mistake what do you have to hide right?
@@naraendrareddy273 It's not about mistakes, it's about personalities. You can't expect everyone to react the same way nor feel the same way. Some people could even start a fight they see someone else checking out their partner. Do you really wanna tell someone like that that your ex messaged you ? You should try looking at the big picture
If he showed her the full text, problem solved. If he deleted the text, then he created a problem.
how did she know about the conversation if he deleted the onversation and didnt tell her? Logic dictates that he did not delete the conversation and kept his account logged in, then she saw it either by accident or snooping.
I agree with the guy who said you have to create the atmosphere for trust. Be forthcoming and don’t give room for doubts to creep in.
I agree with Steve on this. 💯
I was raised by a mother who had to know everything or felt I was lying. I am here to tell you, it is not lying. It is called privacy. Intrusive people cause much damage emotionally and psychologically. I don't think demanding so much from one''s partner is proper nor respectful to the partner. I like to be talked to but I don't demand I get told every little detail. That is too intrusive as far as I am concerned. If a person does not have any privacy of thought, that causes much distress to that person.
None of the men including Steve answered her question
The answer to her question is that she cannot make him understand that being silent is the samething as lying because nobody can make anybody say, do or agree with anything they say.
Because he disagrees with her perspective.
Because they can't refrain from laughing when answering the question as if they don't believe themselves the bs they're about to say. They look to each other for support or for assurance, they were clearly not 100% honest.
@@user-gw1nc8fs2u no, they do not offer advice that withholding info is equal to lying because that is an opinion. Opinions cannot be proven. You can't prove a feeling with a fact. Her question is simply about her own feelings, only she has the answer. Plus, she's stubborn as hell.
They did Answer just not woman is right. Not telling full truth is lying its saving from a fight over nothing. Examples A man goes shoe shopping Woman works there says "you look nice" she sees the ring he ain't gonna tell the wife hey a sales woman flirted with me please. Ladies tell half truths too the I had this dress for years I just got out of dry cleaners with the damn tag still on it. The husband just had too message its rude not reply said" Thanks for messaging I'm married. Good too know your well blessings outta respect no other messaging for my wife woman too woman as you would ask of your man. And left it when his asked. Said okay if you think that of me I'll get room you find me when your not thinking outta of fear
Like Steve said sometimes it’s an omission not to tell. Some things are better to be kept to yourself to avoid conflict in your relationship.
totally agree. u don't share EVERYTHING. there are certain things that arent worth sharing cuz they will create nothing but tension and the last thing I wanna do when I get home from a long day or work is more drama and issues
I've notice alot of questions coming from ladies usually start off with..."how do I get my man to..." Forget how he feels. How do I get him to do what I want him to do. What is this...tech support?
😂😂😂
Steve got it right about Omission. We boys even at a young age tend to do this even with our own parents.
The question is if you caught your girl doing the same secret hook up chatter, wd you feel it's nothing to be concerned about.
Steve spoke Very well,. My mum, has always advice me the simpler way. Thanks Steve ,
Free flow of info. is important!
But everybody needs a personal space from time to time.
He responded- he started the issue.
I'm sorry but I disagree; if there is trust between partners then they should be comfortable enough to share with one another if an ex has contacted them--having a whole conversation via Facebook is not okay! I am sure if that were Marjorie having a long conversation with an ex via Facebook he would have something different to say.
💯💯💯
Easier said than done miss
You women make tragedy and problems from little things that have no meaning to men...
+patrick82895 Withholding information like holding a conversation with an ex is still lying. And of course she doesn't own him but if they are in a committed relationship there should be open lines of communication.
+Ebony Mitchell Oh get off the wagon with that. There are no open lines of communication because the man would be criticized for every move he makes while the woman would just justify it regardless of what argument made. The video showed that even after being told in detail what the man thinks yet women just want to say "Well the way its supposed to be is xyz". Let the man have his faults and get over it. The man didn't go beyond the computer screen, so the issue can be resolved faster.
The ending is so funny (🤣 is she still standing there?)😂😂😂😂
Lol still standing after the question was answered that says a lot right there 😂
They didn’t understand her question. Classic. She’s asking for better communication... not telling someone’s every move . The arrogance of these guys to think that people wanna know what they boring asses do all day 🙄
😂😂😂
This comment needs to be on the top!!
She asks as if she is a passive piece in the relationship though. These guys did not come off as arrogant to me, they just tried to describe how that issue is dealt with in their current or past relationships and actually spoke of some things that lady should take to heart. She's trying to push this ridiculous agenda of "if he doesn't tell me he's lying" which just screams insecurity and distrust. Yes maybe the man has earned it in the past but as it stands we just know that we have a lady who doesn't trust her man to tell her what he sees as important and she is insecure in the relationship. She even says that she overshares, she clearly shows herself to be very insecure. That one guy got it right imo: you don't need to convince him to tell you everything, you must work against a level of communication and trust so that he wants to tell you things and you want to tell him everything. Just declaring that if he doesn't tell you everything he's automatically lying does jack. From what we know he hasn't even done anything wrong. Those two needs to work on their damn trust before she comes on TV as if this guy is maliciously lying to her. Smh
Exactly 💀
woman never will tell men everything its just the truth
rowdy....neither man will do. But it's really normal and that's how it's suppose to be.
False a lot of women do, men don’t 100%
We tell everything that we think our spouse would like to know. For example if I made a new friend that happens to be of the opposite sex we'd definitely tell! but you guys wouldn't do that. You could exchange numbers with a girl and just because your intentions in your head were good you wont tell... what if that girl's intentions aren't good??? Guys.... We rather you tell us soon as it happens than finding out way after because that's when we'll feel insecure able and create drama (speaking only on my behalf)
@@snmcreativestudio3376 "We tell everything that we think our spouse would like to know."
No, you do not.
That's simply a lie and you should never act as if you speak for all women, I've had girlfriends who lied and withheld the truth so don't even dare say "we" as if you're the unison voice of women, because then I will call you a liar based on personal experience and I can find plenty of examples to support this claim.
I agree
Taking charge of my health and I have quit taking all chemical drugs, lost internet for a month due to money issues, being disabled sucks. I became spiraling down depressed. I got my internet back and what is the first thing I had to do? Well, Ta Da, I am here. I just watched you and guess what, You are my anti-depressant. You lifted that fog, like Sunshine does for me. I thank you. I am so grateful, my husband will be so grateful also, fantastic husband, poor guy. You are truly my Sunshine and I love you. You inspire JOY!
I think this is why it's so important to know and understand your partner, no you don't have to give every detail of your life, but if you feel there is something they deserve or WANT to know you should tell them. It's never black and white, if you know your partner is impulsive and telling them would likely make the situation worse then by all means use your better judgement to decide to tell them or not. There is no right or wrong just what works for the two individuals it concerns.
But we have to keep in mind, there is a big difference in what a married couple and someone that's just dating should do in a relationship...
Yeah. If ur still in the process of getting to u know people, it's okay to still get to know right?
*HE should’ve never messaged his ex back. Period. Then it wouldn’t be a big deal that she messaged him, because he didn’t message her back.*
*It’s because he messaged her BACK that it’s a problem.*
Why is that a problem ??
He did not cheat she had access that means there is nothing to be mad at
I agree with her 100%. Keeping secrets is tantamount to lying.
But who tells their spouse or mate every detail of their day? Does it mean they are a liar if someone doesnt tell them how they had tuna for lunch?
I strongly agree with steve!
It’s called lying by omission! Those who have nothing to hide HIDE NOTHING!!! Now if he stumbled upon you conversing with an ex all hell would of broke loose!
I understand that it's really really important to share relevant information in a commited relationship, but I agree with some of the guys on the panel and Steve that not all kind of information should be shared and that isn't lying.
The keyword here being relevant. In this case it is not for her to decide what is relevant or not, that is on him. If she can't handle it, sorry for your damn luck. Street's that way, good riddance.
I love Steve!!!!
I agree with Steve... n he is so smart. I love the colour blend.
They woman isn't asking why her man doesn't have control over soneone else. Ya'll are missing the point. She is asking why her man chose to communicate back but didn't care to mention that part to her.
Nevermind that she thinks it's lying or blah blah blah.
Why not tell the woman the reason for his response to the ex's message?
I have two possible answers: he wanted to respond out of curiosity/ possible interest or it was an impulse which he felt bad about. Either why it doesn't look good for the guy she's dating. 🤷♀️
I don't need to know everything, trust God and live for HIM....! God is the center of my life and it should be for everyone.
Preetia Genoia: Amen to that!
Where I'm from around 53% of the population don't believe in God, as they don't need to
not telling you everything is not lying...agreed.
True words steve.
What else was Adam supposed to say when asked on tv "Do you tell your wife everything?" Nah I lie all the time Steve
That girl is stubborn af
@@bigkeith1022 I agree my man. Compromise and reciprocation is a core part of a healthy relationship. This lady is very stubborn and unwilling to even consider others viewpoints. Someone who thinks their ALWAYS dead right and never listens or backs down is just unhealthy and will never be content long term.
@@ThePsychicFish Well said my dude!
@@bigkeith1022 Thanks haha it's just that some women just don't get that and it's sad a lot of men just accept it. But it is a dealbreaker for me personally.
@@bigkeith1022 Me personally I don't believe in zodiac signs but yeah I agree. There are a few fundamental things that should not be compromised on (eg: requiring respect) and re entering the dating pool when you are ready for a serious long term relationship with a compatible woman who won't try to exploit you. But remember the whole compromise thing goes both ways you're gonna have to do it too but ONLY when it is within reason to do so or you are in the wrong.
Good luck my man
@@ThePsychicFish Exactly. And I dont really put all my faith in Zodiac signs either but that woman was a TAURUS my friend. Very bullheaded. Best wishes to u as well.
Lady, you are very blessed.
If u in a relationship with someone u do it’s true u do have to build that trust with them , but on the other hand u both r best friends from the beginning , should definitely feel comfortable to share everything with each other , honest goes a huge way in certain people
Exes r exes for a reason , I believe that is all wrong if u talk or have any talk with an exe , your dome with then for good leave it be
if a whole conversation went on, he should have told her.
But if that ex had messaged him, and he never responded, then as a man he wouldn't feel the need to say anything because nothing happened. and it would have started unnecessary drama.
A whole conversation took place, now that is weird how he did not feel the need to tell her. Because some exes just want to crawl back in your life. And his omission of letting that happen, is just suspicious.
And lets pretend the conversation was innocent, still, if it is that innocent why not mention it to your girl. Better be careful.
first email is like regular mail no has a right to read his mail withouthis permission and she need to understand that him not telling her about the email is not lying
her going through emails in a big red flag it is the first step to cut him off from friends
people are allowed to have friends outside of marriage
Having a conversation with an ex, and a stranger helping you load your groceries is not the same thing.
That's right. I bet some men would kindly help some women out there with groceries too but who knows what his intentions are if he suddenly help her when he doesn't usually help carry a stranger's groceries.
trust, communication, honesty...
I liked Colin answer!!!!!!👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾❤️
how is that the same thing as lying. you cannot tell everything, Steve took the words from my mouth, it's exactly the kind of example I was going to give. You want healthy relationship? don't overshare. giving your s/o stuff to worry about is not going to make your relationship last. all people deal with anxiety why add on it. If my man came home and told me some chick messaged him I would be even more suspicious. Why is he telling me this, it must be important, if he came up to me to admit then something went down and he's not sure how to deal with it.
Private messages on FB and an ex never a good sign
@Thelondonbadger yeah that'd be incredibly stressful .and not worth it after a while of dealing with it
@Thelondonbadger nailed it !! Insecurities for sure
@Thelondonbadger not at all and that was my point ! I don't even have any social media accounts period to be honest
@Thelondonbadger I agree 💯 when we complain about our spouses it causes people to judge them based on those negative things said ,not on who the person really is ,therefore incredibly unhealthy to do for both
He's right!
Love ya, Steve
Ok so I really love what Steven is doing. I work with my clients through the use of tarot cards to explain mostly to the female partner of the relationship the male perspective of a relationship and how they are taught and told by society not to embrace their emotions and that love and relationships have different lens that men wear because of how they were told that love should be vs what it really is. Now for the woman who asked the question I have a bit of issue with...she is in the right to be upset, but instead of taking her anger out on his ex she is taking out on her husband which fueled her insecure feelings towards her partner and her role as wife in the relationship dynamic. When she used the words “how do I control” gave her away. First thing first you can never have control over anyone else but yourself and your actions not even your partner. marriage is just a title with legal ramifications that ties in with long term commitment. I get asked these questions about control often and I tell my clients if they want to work on control then they need to work on the issues dealing with and surrounding control within themselves with a psychologist or psychiatrist. We are told we have power of others when in fact we don’t we just have influence.
Why do I need to tell my partner everything? It is not really worth it but women should choose their questions wisely since they too themselves doing the same exact things that their men are doing. So read romans 2 verses 1 to 7. And matthew 7 verses 1 to 5 n 12
I like what the second guy says a lot I totally agree
GET THEM STEVE
Why would I tell my man that someone was kind enough to help me with my groceries? I’m not secretly calling or texting that guy. That is not even close to being on the same level as communicating with AN EX in secret! These guys are FOS!
what is he not allowed any friend outside the relationship
that she is going through his emails is a red flag
she is demanding that the guy tell her all his friends as if she has a right to choose who he is friends with
and, of course, not every tiny detail! but a large detail, like a married man being contacted by an ex of any kind? no WAY should that married man be interacting with that ex behind his wife's back! unless he wants a divorce!..no, tell the wife the ex contacted him and the wife can respond to her for *both* her husband and herself..and/or the husband can say, after informing his wife, "nice to hear from you and, sure! my wife (or girlfriend), lisa and i, we would be happy to meet you for coffee!"...any man who has a real girlfriend or a wife should not treat his primary relationship as if it were casual dating!..period!!..otherwise anything less means he is not serious about the woman he claims is supposedly primary in his life..and she should dump him, immediately!
I agree with Steve.
Tell us everything.truthful.. Lol
Why do i have to check in and tell you everything i'm doing and where i'm at. Like some sort of child. I mean if you call me and ask, then i have no problem telling you. But check in like a child would never! I'm just not doing that!
You're more than likely single. lol
L.P. Lightwell Really?? LOL... No sorry I'm not single. I haven't been single for 7 years. Its called trust. Like people have forgotten that is apart of the deal. If you demand that i report every action before i undertake it, is a sign of distrust. We have to start from a place of trust. If you transfer baggage of distrust into a new relationship that relationship is bound to fail. It's common sense. People are crazy now and days.
***** Yes you would speak to your significant other numerous times through out the day. If where, when and with whom are discussed during the natural course of the conversation that is not the problem. The problem is operating from a position of having your actions continuously scrutinize. I believe it actually fosters distrust. It raises the question, why is this person so skeptical of me. When I've given no reason to be. It's not done for the benefit of that person. Its done to satisfy the insecurity of your significant other.A relationship is absolutely built on trust. But trust is not earned by reporting your every action. Contrary to the common belief 'trust is earned'; A new relationship must begin from a place of trust. And every action from that point either strengthens or devalues that trust.
***** The problem with the world today; People have normalized distrust. The expectation of honesty and loyalty from the outset should be a given. If a person spontaneously end ups at a social function, to stop and report their actions is just not reasonable. Now if your spouse is waiting on you, it would be incumbent as a courtesy to inform them. But to inform someone of your every action before undertaking it is not rational. Relationship fail because of distrust. We open pandora's box by planting the seed of infidelity with the condition of x, y, z. It kills passion and spontaneity of a relationship by placing unnecessary strings. It doesn't allow a person to be open because you set a requirement. e.i. enter the complications and the long spiral to a break up begins.
who here also read Steve's lips saying no you don't?
Dan is clueless and Steve’s look he gave him was hilarious!
I had 2 very different relationship, 1 was with the man that would me tell me everything. Literally everything about his day.
2nd with the man that wouldnt tell me anything unless I ask.
10 years later, I know why and what to keep
Better being loved then in love