It takes nearly eleven minutes for one of the *title characters* to have her first line of dialogue. They had time for a trip-out dream sequence that was so long they started looping the animation, but they didn't have time to show us anything of Beauty's personality before the ghosts pegged her for the Beast's future wife.
Beauty’s personality? What personality? All she cared about were roses and *her* garden to the point she was ready to kill her entire family to save it during the storm and was only upset about its destruction and not caring and being upset that the only shelter she and her family had from the weather was heavily damaged and had pieces missing from it.
this Belle is so humble, she doesn't even want hairpins for a proper hairdo. Also, all that beautiful classical music in this movie... mixed with that animation and popsongs makes my toenails curl up ...
I don’t think she’s humble at all. Remember, she was ready to drown her entire family over some flowers during the storm and was only upset that *her* garden was destroyed and not the house that had even worse damage to it and now had large pieces of itself Missing,
That poor horse! First idiot dad releases him with dangling reins to get tangled on stuff and/or trip over. If he manages to survive the storm he won't be able to eat properly due to the bit. Then he has to pull a carriage without a driver for the rest of the movie. When the carriage is not in use he is left hitched because...
These riffs are outstanding! As for this version of "Beauty and the Beast"... yeesh. 1. Phelous (who also does a hilarious review of this version) pointed out the psycho non-logic of the Beast reading "Beauty and the Beast". It's like if Spike Jonze came up with this idea... then came to his senses and thought, "What the hell was I thinking? This is stupid!" and threw it out, hoping no one ever discovers his horrid lapse in judgment. 2. Why does the black ghost talk like Yogi Bear? You know what? Don't bother answering, it won't help matters any. 3. You know how in the song "Belle" the townspeople tell us about Belle's qualities, but we're also SHOWN them, so we can see and judge for ourselves? In just five minutes, we see Belle is a pretty, bookish introvert seen as weird by everyone else. Here, the ghosts just continually tell us Beauty is "something", and we're just supposed to mindlessly agree. Okay, I'm being unfair, let's see... Beauty, uh... wears her hair down as opposed to her sisters, and she, uh, looks nice in pink... oh! She has cheesy, elaborate dreams! AND she has a cat! How many cats did Belle have? Uh, ZERO! Characterization achieved! 4. The sisters' villain song is ALMOST funny, but by virtue of being stuck in this movie, it's a letdown. 5. The ghosts seem a little too eager to take Beauty's dad to the dungeon. I think they've been hanging around the Beast for too long. 6. Damn, THAT'S the Beast's backstory?!? The prince in the Disney version was just kind of a dickhead, but we could at least muster some sympathy for him losing his humanity! The prince in this one was pure evil! Good God, he makes Gaston look positively heroic by comparison! Serves you right being turned into a Beast! Good riddance, asshole! 7. Okay, Beauty fell down the stairs running from the Beast in fear. Pretty dark, but that at least opens the door for character development: perhaps the Beast, feeling guilty for scaring her, tends to her, nurses her back to health, sincerely apologizes, she can forgive him, and they can start bonding over stuff. OR he can just brusquely dump her on the bed, order the dumbass ghostly "Hamilton" rejects to watch her, then offer a half-assed apology and a damn rose (I highly doubt Beauty ever wants to see a rose ever again), that's good too, I guess. 8. So Beauty not only marries the douchebag who terrorized her dad, imprisoned her without a pang of remorse, and has no redeeming qualities whatsoever, but the stupid specters decide NOT to move on to the next life, opting to hang around the asshole responsible for their deaths. By all means let's keep criticizing the DISNEY version for endorsing Stockholm Syndrome!
Yeah...also in the Disney movie when he gets angry with her SHE LEAVES at once and only returns because he got hurt saving her. She also broke all the rules he set for her and wasn't scared to stand up to him when he was a dick to her. She only became nicer when HE became nicer. In this version as you've pointed out, he shows NO PROGRESS. He yells at her constantly, frightens her. He also never explicitly told her that she cannot go to that room with a mirror. So he didn't set the rules and then got pissed at Beauty for breaking them. HE ACTUALLY, LET PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH. And since he is A PRINCE OF THE LAND it means it was HIS LANDS that went through drouth AND HIS PEOPLE that were dying. So he was basically an absolutist, greedy tyrant that hoarded wealth and would rather have people die than share a dime. (In the original the people helping him are his servants, that decided to stay in his employ after he became human and changed his ways) The ghosts are literally helping him to redeem himself, even tho they're his victims and they root for him and actually tell us that HE DESERVES BETTER. Again, Beast doesn't change a bit and Beauty still excuses his behavior. I think THIS ONE is about Stockholm Syndrome because everyone seems to have it. Cuz the guy never changes but people learn to accept it and stand up for him. Also in the Disney movie when Belle's dad gets sick Beast lets her go and doesn't require of her to come back at all. In this one he tells her he's gonna die from loneliness if she doesn't come back. It sounds like a threat. Like how can she not return if he is basically holding her responsible for his life.
Fun fact: Stockholm Syndrome has never been shown to actually exist. As such, there is no agreed on definition and criteria for formal diagnosis. Further research has shown that, in the hostage situation that the name comes from, the police were careless and threatened the lives of the hostages just as much as the perpetrators did. Some think it's a survival response and belongs under PTSD and Traumatic Bonding.
Oh Beauty certainly *is* something. Something stupid who has such an obsession for roses that they were all she was crying about during the storm to the point she was actually going to let her family die just so she could see them and then the only thing she cried about afterwards because they were destroyed. Forget about how the house had broken windows and huge chunks of the roof missing. The loss of some roses is the true tragedy here.
In Disney's BATB, they said in order for the story to work, the audience's sympathy has to be with the beast, and for the most part, it is (doesn't mean he's not a jerk at first). In this version, the beast just seems to fly into a rage over the drop of a hat and never improves, and Beauty is superficial and a doormat
Anyone who says "cellar door" is one of the most beautiful phrases in the English language has clearly never heard "trash romance cover version of Funky Winkerbean". Thanks for the wonderful trip into Musical Hell!
GOD I could feel my bones turning to dust at the first song! Also: Can this special NOT shut up for one minute? The blessed seconds of silence between the ENDLESS background music are a relief too short Oh and this is also passed really poorly
Member that time when Phelous made a review of this mockbuster? Also, 10:28 ... Beauty! Were you smoking again? I’m afraid I have to let in the storm to teach you a lesson!
I'm sorry, but I can't think of this movie without the dialogue of Phelous' review...still, good riffing. Maybe one of these days you can tackle "Little Angels: The Brightest Christmas" for a future MHTV, I bet it's one of those properties that the guys upstairs have disowned.
I can't wait to hear her reaction to those angels cheerfully singing about a dog that just got hit by a truck (even though he clearly didn't). "SO SAD!"
23:13: Speaking of Phelous, I'm surprised he didn't mock the Beast for claiming HE let's Beauty's father in the Castle (given how bad of a person he is in this adaptation), when it was his ghost servants!
If you will, think of some of the greatest original love songs in animated movies: A Whole New World, Tale As Old As Time, Can You Feel The Love Tonight, how long were those? Apparently according to the internet those songs were _just barely two-and-a-half minutes_ long. I clocked it and Beauty's love ballad, _no joke,_ goes on for _4 minutes._
A Beast with no fangs?! Who sings like Zac Efron but talks like Barry White?! I know they tried to tone down everything about the story for children, but this degree of blandness makes the Disney SEQUELS look like Cocteau. Good riffing!
Funny, that's what she said when a dolphin showed up, and that's what the dolphins say when leaving wherever the heck they came from and how that book got its name.
The saddest part is, this movie included a lot of lovely bits of "La Belle et La Bete" that weren't in the Disney version: the father being a merchant who fell on hard times, the spoiled sisters, Beast asking Beauty to marry him every night, the magical mirror, the dreams of a handsome prince--it just BOTCHES THEM ALL HORRIBLY. But by far the worst part was the sound editing. The classical music is too loud, what original songs are there suck, and the sound effects are horrible. I could almost forgive the animation quality and the constant recycling of scenes in the subpar love song, if the sound throughout the entire movie didn't sound like it was mixed by a 5-year-old with attention deficit disorder.
The Disney version had the magical mirror. It wasn’t as prominent but it was used to show Beauty that Maurice in the woods on the ground and needing help and to show the townspeople the Beast which was more of a mistake as they all thought he was a monster that kept her as a prisoner for moths.
41:29: Beauty (when seeing the Beast turn into a Swan, after comedically falling down stairs): I would've jumped that big hairy beast, but a swan? THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT KIND OF BESTIALITY!
I think those ghosts were indeed inserting themselves into the story. I've heard of Self-Insert Fanfic Sequels, but Self-Insert Fanfic Mockbusters is something else entirely! (Also, why does one of the ghosts sound like Droopy?) I think the only reason this didn't bring the wrath of the mouse down upon them is because ultimately, the mouse is pretty much going to buy up everything anyway (as they currently have purchased 20the-Century Fox). Why would they want to lay claim to this tripe, you may ask? I say just so they can burn it into oblivion themselves! Anyways, congrats on the 11,000 Subscribers!
Also, this movie isn't particularly well-known, only seeing any sort of fame through this live riffing and Phelan Porteous (otherwise known as Phelous).
Jacob Below : this movie sucks, but as Disney does not own fairy tales they technically cannot do anything if a bad rip-off movie of one of their fairy tale movies comes out. People can throw out as many fairy tale adaptations as they want.
The father picked a pink rose even though Beauty specifically said a red one. I think it’s clear that he doesn’t even pay attention to what his daughters say to him.
DaemonenprinzessinXD I get where you're going with this, but I'd like to point out that Swan Princess doesn't have Swan Lake music. Which is really weird. I mean Disney's Sleeping Beauty used music from the ballet of the same name.
Diva, I can't tell you how thrilled I am for you to reach 11K subs AND to hear you finally riff on this failed retelling of a tale as old as time. There were even more musical references than I was expecting this time around, and I was not disappointed. Also, huge coincidence, I was revisiting Rifftrax's Santa Claus live showing just before I found this in my subscriptions, so I laughed double loudly at "No, Lupita!!" Sounds like you had a blast doing this one, and I couldn't be happier for you reaching a real subs count milestone. Congrats!!
The #6 Runaway Guys Fan One of the characters in the movie is a poor little girl named Lupita who is tempted to steal a doll, and the narrator constantly intervenes saying “No, Lupita!”
Anyone notice how when Beauty said her father was very sick, Beastie-Boy said "Then you must go to him", the _exact same line_ that Beast said to Belle when she said Maurice was seriously ill in the Disney version?
Ok, the snow scene bothers me SO much. He just leaves the reins on the ground. This a a major hazard to the horse and they are likely to step through the leather and tangle their legs which can cause then tho fall and injure their knees or become lame (the horse version of tearing/straining a ligament/muscle). Also in this setting you really should remove the bit form the horse's mouth AS IT IS METAL! (It doesn't really matter because all movies including horses generally treat them as plot devices and no rider in movies can actually ride)
6:53 Wow, A flying unicorn and a prince. Looks like he can show us. Shining, Shimmering and Splendid Infact when was the last time that Beauty let her heart decide.
I really hate these ghosts. They literally go stalking for a woman for the beast to fall in love, then set Beauty and her father up so that the Beast will make her stay. I hate to state the obvious but, Disney did it better. In that film, yeah the servants really wanted to be human beings again, but they don’t purposefully manipulate the events to make it happen. When Maurice comes, they invite him in out of generosity cause he was lost in the woods and had no knowledge he had a daughter. As for them considering Belle to be the one to break the spell, the reason for that was not that they had went stalking random women to break the spell, but have waited ten freaking years, and would pretty much go for any woman who walked in as a possibility. They in no way influenced Beast to take one of them prisoner, and even tried to tell him not to imprison Maurice. Belle made that decision All on her own. And they showed genuine admiration for her courage and pity for her situation. Especially Mrs Potts who kinda acts the most motherly to her. Love that movie.
You got a point there. The way you put it, those three ghosts are just as evil, selfish and heartless as the Beast that murdered them many years prior are, only focusing on wanting to get rid of their ghostly curse at the extent of costing another innocent woman's welfare.
And, also worth noting, the Disney version has it so the staff members are always supervising the Beast when he's interacting with Belle, until they are confident he can be left alone. "Be Our Guest" is a declaration of the staff's *delight* in being able to tend to Belle, in direct defiance of the Beast's orders. They want to be free of the curse, but their guest's well-being comes before that. This version's Be Our Guest knockoff focuses on the surface level of "wow, look at all this food!" which misses the core emotion of the original, where the staff is so happy to have someone to put in their best effort for that they can't help but break into the biggest song of the movie. With the context of having already singled Beauty out, the food song is for luring the dad into the Beast's lair like the prey he is.
@pinkcupcake4717 and in the Disney version, the writers said in order for the story for work, the beast has to be sympathetic. In this version, he isn't.
9:45 "This is God! Finish the song before I smite thee into oblivion!" 10:00 "You have been warned!" Me: (a minute-and-a-half later) "What?! The movie's not over?! Dammit!"
Growing up we didn’t have cable or money for any of the new movies out. These movies were always a free rental 😂 Yes these are awfully cheesy, but they bring back so much nostalgia. Loved being reminded that these existed and weren’t just a fever dream!
Disney only used music that wasn't theirs in one movie of theirs (and that was Sleeping Beauty, and that was taken from one ballet adaptation of the story). That is, until they release The Nutcracker and the Four Realms into theaters, which uses all music from the Tchaikovsky production.
6:20 I don't undarstand why this was beginning of the movie. I know everyone knows the story but still This movies "romance" in the nut shell Beauty have feaver dream about some guy on pegasis She become prisoner NEXT DAY she hears how Beast play the song from her dream so she decide she loves him but get scared when this "nice" fellow who just happend to imprison her dad ask her to marry him, who would think that she won't agree after one day? But then again, she have quite low standards, or she is like ghost and already knows the story. Also, how is it that Beuaty is the only good daughter and rest of them are royal bitches? I know this is from fairy tale, but this plot point is so stupid.
So this adaptation (not the original tale) is about seeing inner beauty and loving someone for who they are inside. That’s why the ghosts use physical beauty to decide who “the one” is. Nice. At least in the Disney version, Belle may have been unmatched in beauty but the Beast didn’t love her just for that. She genuinely had a good heart and had to show it before he started feeling for her. She was “the one” because she was strong and kind. Not because she was the hottest woman in town.
AND the Beast in this version doesn't change or improve himself to bring out his true self. He's a raging jerk the entire time, and *poof* suddenly he's all princely manners! Though this Beauty's qualities are incredibly flat and shallow, so maybe it evens out.
36 minutes in: “when the first snow falls” But... The snow was already falling when the dad ended up in the castle... So like... is he stuck this way or not? ... wait didn’t they say years ago!? Is this like Auckland? Does the snow only fall once ever?
Maybe the enchantress waited years later to curse him? Also, I do genuinely wonder if these guys thought this through. At least the plot holes in the Disney version were minor.
@@sarah98917 That's just what they have always been called. I suppose because if you hold up a single rice krispy and look at it it is like a bubble of air surrounded by a crisp shell.
31:30 - 32:50 - Wow. The Tchaikovsky ALMOST WORKS for this scene. If only it faded to black with the beast wallowing in self pity after destroying all of his beautiful things, it'd be perfect... "When you neglect safety, you shake hands with danger." I CANNOT be the only one singing the guitar riff as a Pavlovian reflex to the phrase "shake hands with danger", can I? lol
After dozens of rewatches, I am still left with one burning question, and it is this: ARE THE GHOSTS INVISIBLE OR NOT??? This question haunts both my waking and sleeping hours.
Marcus Zyker Old Man: Oh, Senor Mustache... you'll never be a popular as I am! I can read Creepypastas! Senor Mustache: That may be brother, but I was laughing my ass off when you got mauled by that wolf in Phelous' White Phang by GoodTimes revi- (Gets shot by Old Man holding a rifle) Senõr Mustache: Gaaaaahhhh! (Falls over while the Dingo Wah wah music plays) Old Man: He told me to do the dishes... (hands the rifle to Wabuu) Wabuu: You owe me 100 bucks for wasting my rifles' bullets...
Press 1 for bass-drum shoes Press 2 for the song that lasted 4 minutes and just now is about to end Press 3 for a Friday at Walmart Press 4 for Eat with a passion Press 5 for for the rest of your life in my dungeon!! Press 6 for Wait, the Beast was singing the whole time? He's got a pretty good Metzome on him. Press 7 for He had whole storehouses full of grain, whole lakes full of water, whole food courts full of Panda Expresses and Orange Juliuses! Press 8 for sad Press 9 for {imitating prince's loud curse scream} Press 0 for RESTART!
The musical pieces of Tchaikovsky in this are beautiful as always. Stupid to put in this, though. However, luckily, all I would be paying attention to is the music
And another thing that bothers me! Beauty is supposedly the dad's favorite child, but for all their wealth he's down with his daughter doing all the housework by herself? Not a single maid or cook or anything? He's happy for her to be free labor with minimal upkeep costs? I could understand if their financial ruin means no workers, and Beauty is the only child willing to do the work to help the household, but nope! Three daughters have silks and chocolates while the other lives in squalor as a servant. Even if Beauty demanded to be treated like The Help, she's totally fine with the Beast giving her nice things, so it's not even a vow of poverty for religious reasons. I can't follow her own logic!
It takes nearly eleven minutes for one of the *title characters* to have her first line of dialogue. They had time for a trip-out dream sequence that was so long they started looping the animation, but they didn't have time to show us anything of Beauty's personality before the ghosts pegged her for the Beast's future wife.
Why do I see you everywhere? >.>
Beauty’s personality? What personality? All she cared about were roses and *her* garden to the point she was ready to kill her entire family to save it during the storm and was only upset about its destruction and not caring and being upset that the only shelter she and her family had from the weather was heavily damaged and had pieces missing from it.
"If this were a romantic comedy the three sisters would be paired up with the ghosts in the end."
Or you know, Mulan 2.
Only the latter did it cuter.
@@harmonetheanimationaddict4419 Yep, Mulan 2 was better than this!
@Penny Sanchez That’s because it was made by Disney who know how to actually tell a story even if it’s a bad one.
"First snowfall" implies that it's only been a year since the beast was cursed, at most.
Also it already happened. Oops.
33:33 "We're not gonna hurtcha" "We're too depressed to bother" Does that mean they hurt cats when they are in a good mood?
Oh my Godddd this comment made me laugh so hard
Well that joke turned dark real fast.
Joker when Batman is not available.
Fuck, that's disturbing.
“I am as helpless as a star that is falling”...WTF am I watching?!
Basil Baby idk
this Belle is so humble, she doesn't even want hairpins for a proper hairdo.
Also, all that beautiful classical music in this movie... mixed with that animation and popsongs makes my toenails curl up ...
I don’t think she’s humble at all. Remember, she was ready to drown her entire family over some flowers during the storm and was only upset that *her* garden was destroyed and not the house that had even worse damage to it and now had large pieces of itself Missing,
"This is God, finish the song now!" 😂😂😂
Lol
That was the funniest line. 😆
Sir Adam Of Driver. The most iconic line I've ever hear
thanks for the nice present, Diva! I already lost it at "EVERYBODY DO THE NIGHTMARE CONGA"
And that was at the OPENING LOGO, for crying out loud!
IdeaBox9000
*GOLDEN FILMS PROUD PRODUCERS OF THE STEEL DOSSIER TAPE!!*
SEE? Right out of the gate, these are gems!
The one thing I can't stand is all the noise, noise, NOISE!!!!!
Oh no. No, no, no, no, no, no! Why did it have to be this version? Why the one with the Snap Crackle Pop ghosts?
The Shady Reviewer LOL! Really, I LOL'd!
The Shady Reviewer I thought it was the Disney one when I clicked on it
I might’ve preferred the one with old man and thick as a board beauty.
I see you came here from Phelous's review as well.
Nina .Vale Ah. I see you are a man of culture as well.
“Affluenza: The Musical!” Featuring the Poor Person’s version of “Candy Store”!
I know you were joking, but now I really want to see a musical film adaptation of _Heathers_. That would be _amazing_.
Rogue the L.I-Princess But Heathers is based on a movie by the same name you would be basing a movie on a musical based on a movie
Starlight_Feather I know, it’s not the same and a filmed version of the musical like the Hamilton one would be good
That poor horse! First idiot dad releases him with dangling reins to get tangled on stuff and/or trip over. If he manages to survive the storm he won't be able to eat properly due to the bit. Then he has to pull a carriage without a driver for the rest of the movie. When the carriage is not in use he is left hitched because...
Obviously ASPCA was not consoulted on this like they are supposed to be 😂
Sometimes I wonder if the servants start buttering the father up not because they’re nice but because they want him to fall in love with the beast.
These riffs are outstanding! As for this version of "Beauty and the Beast"... yeesh.
1. Phelous (who also does a hilarious review of this version) pointed out the psycho non-logic of the Beast reading "Beauty and the Beast". It's like if Spike Jonze came up with this idea... then came to his senses and thought, "What the hell was I thinking? This is stupid!" and threw it out, hoping no one ever discovers his horrid lapse in judgment.
2. Why does the black ghost talk like Yogi Bear? You know what? Don't bother answering, it won't help matters any.
3. You know how in the song "Belle" the townspeople tell us about Belle's qualities, but we're also SHOWN them, so we can see and judge for ourselves? In just five minutes, we see Belle is a pretty, bookish introvert seen as weird by everyone else. Here, the ghosts just continually tell us Beauty is "something", and we're just supposed to mindlessly agree. Okay, I'm being unfair, let's see... Beauty, uh... wears her hair down as opposed to her sisters, and she, uh, looks nice in pink... oh! She has cheesy, elaborate dreams! AND she has a cat! How many cats did Belle have? Uh, ZERO! Characterization achieved!
4. The sisters' villain song is ALMOST funny, but by virtue of being stuck in this movie, it's a letdown.
5. The ghosts seem a little too eager to take Beauty's dad to the dungeon. I think they've been hanging around the Beast for too long.
6. Damn, THAT'S the Beast's backstory?!? The prince in the Disney version was just kind of a dickhead, but we could at least muster some sympathy for him losing his humanity! The prince in this one was pure evil! Good God, he makes Gaston look positively heroic by comparison! Serves you right being turned into a Beast! Good riddance, asshole!
7. Okay, Beauty fell down the stairs running from the Beast in fear. Pretty dark, but that at least opens the door for character development: perhaps the Beast, feeling guilty for scaring her, tends to her, nurses her back to health, sincerely apologizes, she can forgive him, and they can start bonding over stuff.
OR he can just brusquely dump her on the bed, order the dumbass ghostly "Hamilton" rejects to watch her, then offer a half-assed apology and a damn rose (I highly doubt Beauty ever wants to see a rose ever again), that's good too, I guess.
8. So Beauty not only marries the douchebag who terrorized her dad, imprisoned her without a pang of remorse, and has no redeeming qualities whatsoever, but the stupid specters decide NOT to move on to the next life, opting to hang around the asshole responsible for their deaths. By all means let's keep criticizing the DISNEY version for endorsing Stockholm Syndrome!
Agree with you
Yeah...also in the Disney movie when he gets angry with her SHE LEAVES at once and only returns because he got hurt saving her. She also broke all the rules he set for her and wasn't scared to stand up to him when he was a dick to her. She only became nicer when HE became nicer. In this version as you've pointed out, he shows NO PROGRESS. He yells at her constantly, frightens her. He also never explicitly told her that she cannot go to that room with a mirror. So he didn't set the rules and then got pissed at Beauty for breaking them. HE ACTUALLY, LET PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH. And since he is A PRINCE OF THE LAND it means it was HIS LANDS that went through drouth AND HIS PEOPLE that were dying. So he was basically an absolutist, greedy tyrant that hoarded wealth and would rather have people die than share a dime. (In the original the people helping him are his servants, that decided to stay in his employ after he became human and changed his ways) The ghosts are literally helping him to redeem himself, even tho they're his victims and they root for him and actually tell us that HE DESERVES BETTER. Again, Beast doesn't change a bit and Beauty still excuses his behavior. I think THIS ONE is about Stockholm Syndrome because everyone seems to have it. Cuz the guy never changes but people learn to accept it and stand up for him. Also in the Disney movie when Belle's dad gets sick Beast lets her go and doesn't require of her to come back at all. In this one he tells her he's gonna die from loneliness if she doesn't come back. It sounds like a threat. Like how can she not return if he is basically holding her responsible for his life.
Fun fact: Stockholm Syndrome has never been shown to actually exist. As such, there is no agreed on definition and criteria for formal diagnosis.
Further research has shown that, in the hostage situation that the name comes from, the police were careless and threatened the lives of the hostages just as much as the perpetrators did. Some think it's a survival response and belongs under PTSD and Traumatic Bonding.
Oh Beauty certainly *is* something. Something stupid who has such an obsession for roses that they were all she was crying about during the storm to the point she was actually going to let her family die just so she could see them and then the only thing she cried about afterwards because they were destroyed. Forget about how the house had broken windows and huge chunks of the roof missing. The loss of some roses is the true tragedy here.
In Disney's BATB, they said in order for the story to work, the audience's sympathy has to be with the beast, and for the most part, it is (doesn't mean he's not a jerk at first). In this version, the beast just seems to fly into a rage over the drop of a hat and never improves, and Beauty is superficial and a doormat
And I thought other retellings rushed their relationship too much, this one doesn't even have 5 minutes of development!
Anyone who says "cellar door" is one of the most beautiful phrases in the English language has clearly never heard "trash romance cover version of Funky Winkerbean". Thanks for the wonderful trip into Musical Hell!
GOD I could feel my bones turning to dust at the first song!
Also: Can this special NOT shut up for one minute? The blessed seconds of silence between the ENDLESS background music are a relief too short
Oh and this is also passed really poorly
Member that time when Phelous made a review of this mockbuster?
Also, 10:28 ... Beauty! Were you smoking again? I’m afraid I have to let in the storm to teach you a lesson!
*Were you
The #6 Runaway Guys Fan (fixed)
Maybe I should sacrifice one of my daughters to stop the storm, but DAMN, which one of you is the most useless?
HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Closes his eyes and randomly shoots a water gun then pick which ever one is wet and chooses them.
"We might have lost a lot of money--"
"Buy me a horse!"
Laying it on thick much?
I'm sorry, but I can't think of this movie without the dialogue of Phelous' review...still, good riffing.
Maybe one of these days you can tackle "Little Angels: The Brightest Christmas" for a future MHTV, I bet it's one of those properties that the guys upstairs have disowned.
I can't wait to hear her reaction to those angels cheerfully singing about a dog that just got hit by a truck (even though he clearly didn't).
"SO SAD!"
23:13: Speaking of Phelous, I'm surprised he didn't mock the Beast for claiming HE let's Beauty's father in the Castle (given how bad of a person he is in this adaptation), when it was his ghost servants!
If you will, think of some of the greatest original love songs in animated movies: A Whole New World, Tale As Old As Time, Can You Feel The Love Tonight, how long were those? Apparently according to the internet those songs were _just barely two-and-a-half minutes_ long. I clocked it and Beauty's love ballad, _no joke,_ goes on for _4 minutes._
The ballad is nice and well sung...at first, before it goes on for another five nonillion years
Hm, I'd say around 3-ish or 4-ish minutes.
A Beast with no fangs?! Who sings like Zac Efron but talks like Barry White?! I know they tried to tone down everything about the story for children, but this degree of blandness makes the Disney SEQUELS look like Cocteau. Good riffing!
Cocteau?
Jean Cocteau directed a live film of "B&B" in 1946; even in black & white it's an amazing viewing experience.
I'd say he sounds like Keith David
~Beauty and the~ Dinosaur. With Wacky Unicorn Neighbor! 🙃
Cure Hana Phelous is best.
I really hope animated brunette Fabio and discount Princess Peach live happily ever after.
"Oh, Bellerophon! You take me on the best dates!"
My shriveled, pedantic Classics-major heart is warmed.
Myth geeks of the world unite!
Yay!
@@MusicalHell The Red Ghost is Mario, if his moustache was shaved.
I wanted the dolphins to break into a rendition of "So Long, And Thanks For All The Fish."
Funny, that's what she said when a dolphin showed up, and that's what the dolphins say when leaving wherever the heck they came from and how that book got its name.
4:53 That ghost got all wet, so he's completely useless now... as he was mostly useless before.
DEEEEEeeeeeeee!!!
No, Señor Mustache will never be Old Man!
Oh I wish it was that one.
EEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
"Beauty, were you smoking again? I'm afraid I'll have to let in the storm to teach you a lesson."
When you see the Golden Films logo, you know it's going to be bad...
IT'S OFFICIAL I LOVE YOUR CHANNEL W ALL MY SOUL
uh shes a demon
@Heather Sinbela hey just stating the facts
The saddest part is, this movie included a lot of lovely bits of "La Belle et La Bete" that weren't in the Disney version: the father being a merchant who fell on hard times, the spoiled sisters, Beast asking Beauty to marry him every night, the magical mirror, the dreams of a handsome prince--it just BOTCHES THEM ALL HORRIBLY.
But by far the worst part was the sound editing. The classical music is too loud, what original songs are there suck, and the sound effects are horrible. I could almost forgive the animation quality and the constant recycling of scenes in the subpar love song, if the sound throughout the entire movie didn't sound like it was mixed by a 5-year-old with attention deficit disorder.
Try the canon films version. Not animated but I think you'd like it.
The Disney version had the magical mirror. It wasn’t as prominent but it was used to show Beauty that Maurice in the woods on the ground and needing help and to show the townspeople the Beast which was more of a mistake as they all thought he was a monster that kept her as a prisoner for moths.
Maybe those things were left out for a reason. Although, I think there was a magic mirror in the disney one.
@@alexjewett7455 You are correct.
14:07-14:48 Oh look, I didn't know we would get a cheap rendition of "I Want It Now" from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.
"Sir Adam of Driver."
this would be a much better story if the cat was the protagonist, the cat would never have done half the stupid shit Beauty did
41:29: Beauty (when seeing the Beast turn into a Swan, after comedically falling down stairs): I would've jumped that big hairy beast, but a swan? THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT KIND OF BESTIALITY!
I love when you riff these awful ripoffs, Diva.
I love -when- you -riff- -these- -awful- -ripoffs- , Diva.
I think those ghosts were indeed inserting themselves into the story. I've heard of Self-Insert Fanfic Sequels, but Self-Insert Fanfic Mockbusters is something else entirely! (Also, why does one of the ghosts sound like Droopy?)
I think the only reason this didn't bring the wrath of the mouse down upon them is because ultimately, the mouse is pretty much going to buy up everything anyway (as they currently have purchased 20the-Century Fox). Why would they want to lay claim to this tripe, you may ask? I say just so they can burn it into oblivion themselves!
Anyways, congrats on the 11,000 Subscribers!
Also, this movie isn't particularly well-known, only seeing any sort of fame through this live riffing and Phelan Porteous (otherwise known as Phelous).
Jacob Below : this movie sucks, but as Disney does not own fairy tales they technically cannot do anything if a bad rip-off movie of one of their fairy tale movies comes out. People can throw out as many fairy tale adaptations as they want.
"Don Bluth's The Shape of Water" Zing!
The father picked a pink rose even though Beauty specifically said a red one. I think it’s clear that he doesn’t even pay attention to what his daughters say to him.
Or the animators weren't paying attention
Blond "Heroin" and Swan Lake music gave me horrible flashbacks
DaemonenprinzessinXD I get where you're going with this, but I'd like to point out that Swan Princess doesn't have Swan Lake music. Which is really weird. I mean Disney's Sleeping Beauty used music from the ballet of the same name.
@@gageperuti5519 Hey, Disney was clever.
Diva, I can't tell you how thrilled I am for you to reach 11K subs AND to hear you finally riff on this failed retelling of a tale as old as time. There were even more musical references than I was expecting this time around, and I was not disappointed. Also, huge coincidence, I was revisiting Rifftrax's Santa Claus live showing just before I found this in my subscriptions, so I laughed double loudly at "No, Lupita!!" Sounds like you had a blast doing this one, and I couldn't be happier for you reaching a real subs count milestone. Congrats!!
Lupita?
The #6 Runaway Guys Fan One of the characters in the movie is a poor little girl named Lupita who is tempted to steal a doll, and the narrator constantly intervenes saying “No, Lupita!”
Anyone notice how when Beauty said her father was very sick, Beastie-Boy said "Then you must go to him", the _exact same line_ that Beast said to Belle when she said Maurice was seriously ill in the Disney version?
Yes!
They knew it was the crux of the movie and decided to not bother changing it, as if they would get the same emotional payout without all the buildup.
Ok, the snow scene bothers me SO much. He just leaves the reins on the ground. This a a major hazard to the horse and they are likely to step through the leather and tangle their legs which can cause then tho fall and injure their knees or become lame (the horse version of tearing/straining a ligament/muscle). Also in this setting you really should remove the bit form the horse's mouth AS IT IS METAL! (It doesn't really matter because all movies including horses generally treat them as plot devices and no rider in movies can actually ride)
It also doesn’t matter for an ANIMATED movie. Because the horses aren’t real.
WTF IS UP WITH THE SUDDEN SWAN LAKE
NEVER PUT A GOOD MOVIE INTO A BAD MOVIE
iPhoenix2012 Golden Films uses public domain music for all their movies.
it took 27 minutes for the beast to actually TALK to beauty
27 out of 48 minutes
I'm not even mad
just disappointed
The constant public domain music in the background really ties this shitshow together doesn't it?
6:53 Wow, A flying unicorn and a prince.
Looks like he can show us.
Shining, Shimmering and Splendid
Infact when was the last time that Beauty let her heart decide.
I really hate these ghosts. They literally go stalking for a woman for the beast to fall in love, then set Beauty and her father up so that the Beast will make her stay. I hate to state the obvious but, Disney did it better. In that film, yeah the servants really wanted to be human beings again, but they don’t purposefully manipulate the events to make it happen. When Maurice comes, they invite him in out of generosity cause he was lost in the woods and had no knowledge he had a daughter. As for them considering Belle to be the one to break the spell, the reason for that was not that they had went stalking random women to break the spell, but have waited ten freaking years, and would pretty much go for any woman who walked in as a possibility. They in no way influenced Beast to take one of them prisoner, and even tried to tell him not to imprison Maurice. Belle made that decision All on her own. And they showed genuine admiration for her courage and pity for her situation. Especially Mrs Potts who kinda acts the most motherly to her. Love that movie.
You got a point there. The way you put it, those three ghosts are just as evil, selfish and heartless as the Beast that murdered them many years prior are, only focusing on wanting to get rid of their ghostly curse at the extent of costing another innocent woman's welfare.
And, also worth noting, the Disney version has it so the staff members are always supervising the Beast when he's interacting with Belle, until they are confident he can be left alone. "Be Our Guest" is a declaration of the staff's *delight* in being able to tend to Belle, in direct defiance of the Beast's orders. They want to be free of the curse, but their guest's well-being comes before that.
This version's Be Our Guest knockoff focuses on the surface level of "wow, look at all this food!" which misses the core emotion of the original, where the staff is so happy to have someone to put in their best effort for that they can't help but break into the biggest song of the movie. With the context of having already singled Beauty out, the food song is for luring the dad into the Beast's lair like the prey he is.
@pinkcupcake4717 and in the Disney version, the writers said in order for the story for work, the beast has to be sympathetic. In this version, he isn't.
I WILL DIE.......OF LONELINESS!!!!
Those three ghosts look like the Ghostly Trio from 'Casper' (if the blue one was Fatso if he last ghost weight).
"Everybody, do the nightmare conga!"
I swear I laughed for like 5 minutes straight
Notice how when the Beast was dying how they used the piece of music called 'Dance of the Dying Swan'? Fitting or what? :)
Fitting if the Beast was a swan. And it was Swan Lake we were watching.
9:45 "This is God! Finish the song before I smite thee into oblivion!" 10:00 "You have been warned!" Me: (a minute-and-a-half later) "What?! The movie's not over?! Dammit!"
*This is God, FINISH THE SONG NOW.
Growing up we didn’t have cable or money for any of the new movies out. These movies were always a free rental 😂 Yes these are awfully cheesy, but they bring back so much nostalgia. Loved being reminded that these existed and weren’t just a fever dream!
Looks like the cat's face re-arranged itself in one scene.
The music for"Live Like A King" or whatever it's called sounds like a disco love song from the early '70's.
43:32 I think Phelous made the exact same joke. XD
34:37 Eh, probably. The butler probably got wise to realizing which movie he was about to be in and wormed his way out while he had the chance.
The Beast sounds like a discounted version of Jim Cummings.
Apparently, it's Peter New.
well...fun fact: THIS is Good Times's SECOND attempt at this. the first one was with Golden films
Going, to be honest, I think the Secret of Anastasia was better than this.
Secret of Anastasia was much better.
It was. This music is too loud and doesn't let up.
I would say Secret of Anastasia is the best thing handled by MHTV. Not saying much, but still.
Honestly, that's not exactly a high bar to clear.
movie: tell us something we don't know
diva: uhh ok, female kangaroos have three vaginas
me: they have WHAT?!
Really! Look it up.
What the HELL is up with the constant Swan Lake in this movie?!
Public domain.
12:55 sudden Swan Lake... I'm with you, WAY too much Tchaikovsky in this (though it's better than the original songs...)
Abigail Bloomfield Golden Films uses a lot of public domain songs in their movies (regardless of whether it makes sense or not.)
Disney only used music that wasn't theirs in one movie of theirs (and that was Sleeping Beauty, and that was taken from one ballet adaptation of the story).
That is, until they release The Nutcracker and the Four Realms into theaters, which uses all music from the Tchaikovsky production.
false there is NEVER too much Tchaikovsky, think before you disrespect my gay russian romantic ever again
@@sophiazaynor2089 Maybe not too much Tchaikovsky, but you have to admit it IS a grossly poor use of the composer's work!
"Zeus speaks for all of us." I died.
6:20 I don't undarstand why this was beginning of the movie. I know everyone knows the story but still
This movies "romance" in the nut shell
Beauty have feaver dream about some guy on pegasis
She become prisoner
NEXT DAY she hears how Beast play the song from her dream so she decide she loves him but get scared when this "nice" fellow who just happend to imprison her dad ask her to marry him, who would think that she won't agree after one day? But then again, she have quite low standards, or she is like ghost and already knows the story.
Also, how is it that Beuaty is the only good daughter and rest of them are royal bitches? I know this is from fairy tale, but this plot point is so stupid.
So this adaptation (not the original tale) is about seeing inner beauty and loving someone for who they are inside.
That’s why the ghosts use physical beauty to decide who “the one” is. Nice.
At least in the Disney version, Belle may have been unmatched in beauty but the Beast didn’t love her just for that. She genuinely had a good heart and had to show it before he started feeling for her. She was “the one” because she was strong and kind. Not because she was the hottest woman in town.
So the ghosts are acting like Gaston
No one haunts like Gaston…
AND the Beast in this version doesn't change or improve himself to bring out his true self. He's a raging jerk the entire time, and *poof* suddenly he's all princely manners! Though this Beauty's qualities are incredibly flat and shallow, so maybe it evens out.
32:40 OH WHAT I WOULD GIVE FOR "Evermore" right now.
Brian Jr Spero Or better yet "If I Can't Love Her".
@@gageperuti5519 Both good songs
Why am I so addicted to this? I've watched it half-a-dozen times in the last two days...
Please give us more of these, Christi. Your commentary is GOLD!!!
36 minutes in: “when the first snow falls”
But... The snow was already falling when the dad ended up in the castle... So like... is he stuck this way or not?
... wait didn’t they say years ago!? Is this like Auckland? Does the snow only fall once ever?
Maybe the enchantress waited years later to curse him? Also, I do genuinely wonder if these guys thought this through. At least the plot holes in the Disney version were minor.
So, this is where 'Snap, Crackle and Pop' hang out during their off time at Rice Crispies (or as it is called in Australia 'Rice Bubbles').
Why bubbles?
@@sarah98917 That's just what they have always been called. I suppose because if you hold up a single rice krispy and look at it it is like a bubble of air surrounded by a crisp shell.
"I put out fresh litter for the invisible orchestra" ha!! I had to watch golden films with a 4 year before. I am so aperciating the jokes.
41:35 I can't believe it but...PLEASE PLEASE GIVE ME GASTON!!!
I don't know what's sadder. That Snap, Crackle and Pop are ghosts, or that they're stuck haunting this movie.
And the yellow ghost is actually Super Mario. That isn’t a joke. Charles Martinet, the voice of Mario, is seriously in this dumpster fire.
31:30 - 32:50 - Wow. The Tchaikovsky ALMOST WORKS for this scene. If only it faded to black with the beast wallowing in self pity after destroying all of his beautiful things, it'd be perfect...
"When you neglect safety, you shake hands with danger."
I CANNOT be the only one singing the guitar riff as a Pavlovian reflex to the phrase "shake hands with danger", can I? lol
Apparently, the Beast is voiced by Peter New doing a Keith David impression.
How NOT to write a fairy tale, remake...
YIKES 🥺
Just be grateful that you're not watching the Bevanfield version, Diva. The animation budget must have been £3.50 and a choc ice for that tripe.
Or around 7 dollars and a chocolate ice cream for that garbage for you Americans.
Or the Dingo pictures version
The #6 Runaway Guys Fan Actually more like four dollars and fifty cents.
Ghostwriter
Dingo actually never made a BatB adaptation, oddly enough.
@@chelnahtheegghead Whoops. I don't know how to convert money, thanks.
I would watch a beauty and the beast movie wherein every character is played by Adam Driver. That sounds amazing.
Bet the Reylo’s would love that.
The way Beauty’s father says “Never” reminds me of Leo from the Producers.
Happy 10,000 subscribers!
Yay! MHTV is back!
After dozens of rewatches, I am still left with one burning question, and it is this: ARE THE GHOSTS INVISIBLE OR NOT???
This question haunts both my waking and sleeping hours.
I just assumed that everyone couldn't see them except the beast and the cat
Old manEYEEEEEEEHEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeees
ACTUALLY! This is Senior Mustache, the least popular of the beauty's fathers.
You're Beauty's father lore is lacking sirI
Marcus Zyker
Old Man: Oh, Senor Mustache... you'll never be a popular as I am! I can read Creepypastas!
Senor Mustache: That may be brother, but I was laughing my ass off when you got mauled by that wolf in Phelous' White Phang by GoodTimes revi-
(Gets shot by Old Man holding a rifle)
Senõr Mustache: Gaaaaahhhh! (Falls over while the Dingo Wah wah music plays)
Old Man: He told me to do the dishes... (hands the rifle to Wabuu)
Wabuu: You owe me 100 bucks for wasting my rifles' bullets...
Brandon Roberts Señor Mustache AKA Mini Dad!
FoxHunter I now. But you can never have too much old dad
Couldn’t he have taken cover in the carriage if he was not going to take the horse back home?
I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought he looked like Donkey Kong.
Press 1 for bass-drum shoes
Press 2 for the song that lasted 4 minutes and just now is about to end
Press 3 for a Friday at Walmart
Press 4 for Eat with a passion
Press 5 for for the rest of your life in my dungeon!!
Press 6 for Wait, the Beast was singing the whole time? He's got a pretty good Metzome on him.
Press 7 for He had whole storehouses full of grain, whole lakes full of water, whole food courts full of Panda Expresses and Orange Juliuses!
Press 8 for sad
Press 9 for {imitating prince's loud curse scream}
Press 0 for RESTART!
10:28
AuuAHH
This is hilarious!
All the Tchaikovsky is making me want to watch Barbie
You mean the movie "Barbie of Swan Lake" (2003)? I may not be a Barbie fan, but it's's so much better than this rubbish mockbuster.
The musical pieces of Tchaikovsky in this are beautiful as always. Stupid to put in this, though. However, luckily, all I would be paying attention to is the music
Lol my dad got us Disney’s little mermaid and this instead of Disney’s beauty and beast 🤣 so it brings back unwanted memories 🤣
Movie:Tell me something we don't know!
Diva: Uh, okay, female kangaroos have three vaginas.
I died😂
Thanks, Diva. This video was exactly what I needed after today!
"Sir Adam of Driver" made me laugh out loud omfs
13:58 Oh hey, that’s the screwdriver sound from Submachine 4: The Lab...
27:01 And there it is again!
And another thing that bothers me! Beauty is supposedly the dad's favorite child, but for all their wealth he's down with his daughter doing all the housework by herself? Not a single maid or cook or anything? He's happy for her to be free labor with minimal upkeep costs? I could understand if their financial ruin means no workers, and Beauty is the only child willing to do the work to help the household, but nope! Three daughters have silks and chocolates while the other lives in squalor as a servant.
Even if Beauty demanded to be treated like The Help, she's totally fine with the Beast giving her nice things, so it's not even a vow of poverty for religious reasons. I can't follow her own logic!
The abuse of the music in the public domain kills me
that first song sounds a lot like a whole new world??
That one song seems like it's also trying to copy Aladdin
thought i was the only one that thought the songs sounded very similiar.
I picked up on that "A Whole New World" rip-off, too, and Diva hinted at it.