They opened the stores on Sundays. That didn't help. I wish they would close everything on Sunday again. It was peaceful and our family always got together.
I don't even have to do anything and people take a dislike to me. My family has basically disowned me. Heaven forbid I try to stick up for myself. I have 1 friend since Jr high. And she disrespected me this last Christmas. I don't fit in anywhere including churches. I am 63 and I have isolated myself for quite a long time now. My parents are gone. My pets are why I am still here.
Maybe they don't dislike you but are jealous of you for some reason. Jealous leads to dislike and when you stick up for yourself maybe the truth hurts their ears! Nothing like having unconditional love that only a pet knows how to give, they never hurt you.
One of ten kids, best childhood, loads of family, cousins, so so many special times, took them all for granted, thought it would always be that way; so many babies born into my family of 6 brothers and 3 sisters. We were always friends, always. We hung around together, got older, still close. Our Mom died 20 years ago and it broke our hearts. We loved her so much, she was hilarious and didn’t even know it, that Irish sense of humor was just too darn funny.. 5 of my 6 brothers married Italian girls, and they had huge families. Such an unbelievable combo, Irish/Italian. It was fabulous. We fought over my Mother we all wanted her to come with us on vacation. Her birthday was an event, so much so that we celebrate her birthday to this day. It’s still her birthday, right? We get together and have a party, a cake, give her cards. We are all still here, all ten of us, my oldest brother has lung cancer and it’s hitting us hard. We truly thought we would always be together. Time just flew by, woke up one day old, how the hell did THAT happen. Now all OUR children are fascinated by our family. When we are together, that younger generation see us as we always were, our original family. They are fascinated at the dynamics of all of it and see us change into who we were growing up. We were our first family. Thankfully we all still see each other regularly, I absolutely dread losing each other. We had so much fun with each other and still do. Still best friends. Thanks for this nice way to talk to you. Take care, God bless.
Great video, Phil. I understand completely. When I was young, we had family dinners where all the cousins got together, everybody hung out, etc. When my grandma died, the family seemed like they all went their separate ways, seeing each other occasionally with basically just Mom's, Dads, and children being together. When my Mom died a few years ago, it left my sister, Dad and me, and my sister and I had a falling out a few years ago when my Dad was briefly hospitalized because she was trying to override his wishes. He recovered, fortunately, and changed his power of attorney to me because of things that transpired, but my sister and I have barely spoken since, and it feels like I've basically been disowned. That's okay, though; I'll follow his wishes regardless of consequence, but it looks like once he's gone I'm on my own. It sucks, but i'm in a good place, I work 3 12's a week, and my home is paid for. I miss the days of having all the family and cousins around, but it seems like nobody has time nor cares to gather like that anymore. I'll probably retire to another country or travel from place to place once I lose my Dad. Maybe one day I'll find someone to recreate that kind of family, but it seems less and less likely as time passes by.
I get along with my brother and sister. But his kids ..... well they don't like me man. I am 65 yrs. old. It's not a generational thing. Before retiring last August I worked with people the same age. They hated to see me leave. I am stopping going to these family get togethers because I sit there alone and feel like an outsider because his kids won't even talk to me. I am worried my brother won't understand. I was going to have HIS kids as my beneficiaries' but not going to give money to people that dislike me. My point is I understand man. Why are they (people ) like this. ??? I could go on about a lot more but I don't want to bore people. Just glad I found your channel .
After my Moms passing in 2011, I left town, and haven’t spoken to my siblings since. The only damn reason I did talk to them before that, was for my Mothers sake. I’ve never been so happy in my 68 years. These toxic and poisonous life wreckers will never ruin my life again.
Yep. When my grandma died....the family fell apart. Hateful, deceitful, jealous of one another. It was like "what just happened?" My grandma held the family together and yes the extended family always did Sunday dinners together. Sad to see it all fade away, but I too have good memories.
My family have all passed on. My 2 older sisters died way too early. So I was not prepared to be without family. I retired early because of chronic illness so my work family gone. I too rely on childhood memories...once the grandparents & parents died, the family bonds started to dissolve. Family members moved away & moved on. Out of sight, out of mind.
Exact same here. Since my sister and mother passed away several years ago our family imploded. The relationships had been very strained for many years and after our mother died there was no desire to carry on the pretense of being a happy family.
I'm a boomer. My daughter is around your age. My childhood was near idyllic. My daughter's ..not so much. I divorced my abusive husband when she was two, and I never really got it together after that. Had two more failed marriages. Right now, my 78 y/o brother, his wife, my 55 yo niece, and one cousin (of 42) are all the family I have that don't mind my MAGA politics. I keep thinking I should try writing or talking to my daughter, but then I think "why?" It won't go well. She's 1600 miles away, so there's no face to face possible. I don't ever do Skype or whatever the kids use now. I let the girl go her way. She doesn't hurt me, and I don't hurt her when we don't speak. Sad, but better this way.
I was never able to find a wife and I have a job that keeps me 1000 miles away from my folks, so pretty much on my own but I still talk to them on the phone. Had a lot of great memories from childhood and glad that stuff happened. The 80's were a fantastic decade to grow up in. Had I known that glory was temporary, I'd have done whatever I could get get a camcorder and filmed about everything.
I had four siblings, and my parents raised all of us in a small, three bedroom one bathroom house. Sometimes I STILL marvel that seven people made due with ONE bathroom for all those years. The only income was my Dad's and it wasn't a good job at all. By today's standards we'd be qualified for all the federal and state programs but of course and needless to say, my parents would NEVER, EVER, EVER take a penny of taxpayer money, even if it was available back then, which it wasn't. Yep, we were POOR - like a lot of the families in those middle class neighborhoods back in those days, but like you, we kids never knew it. We never went on vacations other than to visit our cousins across state or down a state for a week. We never went to restaurants, and even a fast food meal was only about once every two months or so. I'd get, along with my brothers, hand me down jeans and other clothes from my cousins who were a couple of years older than us in the mail. It was a way of life for us and millions of other kids growing up in the late fifties and sixties. It was a great childhood and we wanted for nothing, at least us kids. We had no pool or screen house, but a nice, middle class and VERY modest childhood with a nice sized back yard to play in with a TON of other kids on the street and neighborhood. I wouldn't change it for the world, although I know my parents struggled a LOT, and I'd love to have been able to change that. Great video, by the way.
I was going to create my own cologne called you guessed it "Puppy breath" for men. Obviously the ladies are going to love it :) . Seriously though, I totally know what you mean. There's something so magnetic about the smell of a puppy
Phil, you are speaking my language. From the great memories of growing up to the present dismantling of the family after the matriarch and patriarch passed away. Sunday dinners at Gram’s were awesome. No one ever had other plans and how we all fit around that one table is hard to believe, but there was always a chair for everyone. Keep sharing the memories. Because they are so similar to mine, they take me back… even to that litter of puppies in the house. 👍😊
My family story is as dysfunctional as they come. Parents divorced when I was 10 along with my 6 year old sister. Came up on my mother's side of the family. And, it was pretty damn good for my first 20 years of life. Plenty of trips to Holland in the '60s & '70s (I'm half Dutch) to see Oma & Opa. Precious memories. A whole different world then.
The family memories of the good times are priceless. Things have changed in this time we live now. Im 69 and I keep thinking back to the old days! God Bless.
I am 76. My parents are gone & I just finally gave up on my sisters a couple years ago. Same story with me. Nobody likes me & I always was the caretaker. You have to wonder why this is happening to so many people. People seem like just a waste of time anymore. No courage -- no class. Smug, worthless little busy bodies. I like the kids. They've been handed the worst hand of cards, but I think they will make something if it. To my mind, I was always ashamed to be a Boomer. The men were cowards who wouldn't fight in the war & the women were all self-righteous feminists with zero insight into what they actually were & where it was obvious it would lead. Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke! Dana
Thats true saying when that person passed away a piece of the family also passed away. Those times went away, absolutely not the same the family fell and drifted apart.
Being grateful is important if you are wise enough to see it. When we get older, some of us can’t tolerant much drama, so we tend to “peacefully” withdraw more. IMO, Knowing what you can and cannot say to certain family members is key to maintaining those relationships, some of us would rather be real and alone.
hey my brother, from a sister from a different mother. 🙂 I have the same issues with family and friends my whole life, I just never fit in. I'm 61 yo F. recently completed some online test and self diagnosed myself with ASD - autistic syndrome disorder.... high functioning autistic. I retired from the federal government with over 35 years service. I made it but it was very difficult, conflicts with people my whole life...live alone now, have one sister who cares. My moto is Less People Less Trouble. 💕 Bless you my brother xo 🙏
Very good video Phil. My family is in some ways together and in other ways apart. Growing up, I lived closer to my mother's relatives and visited them during summer vacation all of the time. Once I turned about 20, I went to a family gathering on my father's side to celebrate the 90th birthday of the matriarch of that side of the family. Everyone on that side was nice and my brother and I learned a lot about our grandparents as well as other cousins of that generation. Today, I'm closer to my father's side of the family since we moved closer to them once my parents retired. I try to visit them at least once a year, but it's been tougher lately due to my parents health.
I have a few old friends and family members who fell into the Trump cult. I had to just let them go. I can't even talk to them because they just start screaming like children at the slightest bit of truth. I didn't change. They did.
What you don't realize is that you are the one in the cult. The Democrat's abuse of power during the Plandemic should have been enough to keep you from ever voting Democrat ever again and then there is all of their other crimes.
Same thing happened with both of our families. We're technically estranged from my Mom who is a psycho, hubbies family isn't estranged but they just were never close. His parents were the rock that held it together so once they died, we both didn't bother with any of his siblings. I have no issue seeing them at all, it's just we don't miss them. One is a free-loader and the other sibling is a jerk.
You are lucky to have siblings. I have my mother but she probably won't be here much longer. I had two sisters who both passed away, one at the age of 4, the other at the age of 52, both from cancer. My younger brother is a complete asshole and disowned his mother and me 20 years ago.
You must be from New Jersey with that accent. You have a gen x shirt on, I am a boomer myself. I'm like you, older and struggling on my own. We all need to try to remember the good times and forget about the bad.
My parents were the hub of rhe family, when they passed away a decade ago we went our separate ways. I have few happy memories of my early years, I was regarded as a dropkick even then. It's only Christmas cards now. They showed their true colours when I was barely tolerated for dad's funeral, when my mother died, I was told not to bother turning up at all. I've come to terms with it . Interesting stories.
We had a great family. So I thought. My brother and sister and me. As soon as my father died, that was it! It’s like everyone went crazy. No respect anymore and mostly my sister being so mean. My mom had Alzheimer’s and I moved her in with me, and the family fell apart. My mom passed away after a while and I do have my brother. We talk everyday. But family, is totally gone. I don’t have a sister anymore. It’s very sad. I do have great memories though.
Families start falling apart when relatives start moving far apart for many reasons. Better jobs, divorce, attending college , adventure, military service, etc, etc. It's like the friends you have in school after graduation you go your separate ways and for the most part you don't stay in contact with them. The same thing happens with your immediate family. Everyone gets caught up in surviving and dealing with your own immediate family in the location you have chosen for whatever reason. Maybe it is just the way life was supposed to be when we were put here! Who knows?
Phil, nothing like remembering Sundays with Grandma 😊 and the fam! Every family has one piece of sh** person who ruins it for everyone! Your memories are precious! Stay away from these people you’ll never get what you had back….i was born in 1965, and have similar memories! Tuck them away in a special place they are priceless! 😢🎉❤😊
We have to stay strong, things can change anytime, and you may find people like you do here that see how life can be today with people not being interested. I guess there’s so much shiny stuff out there like phones and cars and work status that people have just lost interest in whats real. It will probably be difficult in the future for the new generations that will never have what we had pre-internet.
My left foot remembers lawn darts. Someone tossed one and it ended up going through my shoe and planting itself in the skin between my big toe and the toe next to it. It's crazy to think of some of the things we did as kids. 😀
I'm Gen X, so the falling back on memories rings true with me. All of these events of the past, the relationships with women, with family, the dogs and cats, the old man and his intrinsic goofy ways. Life is just a blur. It goes by so fast. All we can really do is hold onto those memories until our very own has gone, too. All of which was went. All of which is will too.
My family disowned me and I moved out of state with my Wife. She died from cancer a few years later. Since then I discovered my Wife loved playing a victim and trashed me to everyone in sight, especially my family. Sadly I now know she was a malignant covert narcissist who never voiced displeasure with me, yet made up outrageous stories that elicited sympathy from others. She has been gone for 4 years but how do I explain a dead person is to blame for family strive? Won’t I just reinforce what they already believe by conveniently blaming someone who can’t defend themselves? I’m 68 and may take the chance but unsure how to explain it to my family.
I hold a grudge against my brother. Its been 12 years. All thats happened is Im hurting myself with the rest of the family. I wish there was someway to get over it but I just cant.I have great memories and he has ruined it.
1. I'm confused by your being "disowned" by your family. Doesn't your sister invite you over for Thanksgiving and Christmas? 2. I totally understand your joy in a happy childhood. I'm in my 70s and I often wish I had some good childhood memories. They are all painful.
I have many bad ones and many good ones. I mostly focus on the present, but have blacked out many of the bad times. Still remember the good times and also creating many as we speak.
Those were the good old days. Horseshoes, mention that today and they think it's for good luck over the door! I loved my swing set. Drive around today and you barely see a swing set in the yards. The kids are in the house playing games on the tv. Sliding down the hill after it snowed on a tire tube, nothing like it! Today the kids think that's boring but they don't realize the fun they are missing out on. My father would raise beagels for hunting. Boy was he mad at me because I spoiled them and they would listen to me and not him. Family becomes strangers. Isn't it sad. Your so right when the Mother dies the family fractures. MAMA is the glue to the family. When the siblings meet someone the family fractures. Blue Bloods tv show, those gatherings are no longer, who's got to go here, who's got to go there and other things become more important than family and in a split second your family is gone. You've reached out and did your part so shame on them!
Today is my birthday - I'm now officially 61. I've been thinking about my past an my family, and I am also disowned or ignored. That's fine with me. I'm done trying to please people who could never be pleased. I don't think you can raise a family as we had when we were young. I remember going to my Grandma's house - a teeny tiny row house, and we'd pack in my family of 6 and my uncle's family of 5 + Grandma and Grandpa somehow into that dining room. We'd play Pokeno and laugh - people just don't do that anymore. I want to draw my family closer, and am going to do Sunday dinners/games; hoping to bring back some of that good family ju-ju.
Hadn't seen you in my feed. Good to see you again. I don't have too many good childhood memories. I was close to a grandfather my whole life. My cousin got all his belongings. I wanted a single item to remember him by and was denied. So much for family.
"Disowned" sounds a bit extreme. If you have a good relationship with your sister you are ahead. Guessing people in your extended family are more self absorbed. Protecting their resources of time/ money. Focused on their own families. Family "Teams" aren't what they use to be. "It takes a village" should apply for all members in the family. Young, old, married, single, divorced etc.
Since my parents passed I haven't bothered contacting any cousins despite playing together throughout our childhoods. It's not that I dislike them but we have no common interests. The last time was when I met with one cousin at a lunch and we talked for over an hour, I politely asked about stuff he was doing then said bye. Driving home with my wife we both said he spoke for a whole hour about himself and never once asked what we were doing or anything about us. What's the point?
I feed the blue jays in my back yard. They love peanuts. I call em the blue Jay mafia cuz the run 8-10 deep and keep em all for themselves by hiding them in the yard
Really Phil. You really feel this way!? Life is short dude. Hard to imagine but imagine yourself laying in a Medicare nursing home. You have no one and broke it’s coming. No visits-is that what you want? Nah nobody wants that
Matriarchy is woman-centered. 🙂My mother and her sisters and brothers' and cousins got together on some holidays. My father and mother made movies from some of these with an old 8mm Brownie camera. We would watch those over and over again. Wonderful. You may have explained previously, but I don't know why you were disowned. I have heard of parents disowning a child that was gay, lesbian, left a religious cult but you sound like you had a similar childhood to mine which was full of adventure roaming local woods and building camps, hunting, fishing, riding bikes, etc.
OK. Sounds like a good deal. Now, I don't mean to impose...but do you think they could disown me? I'm kind of an elder orphan so there's nobody left to disown me. Thanks.
I also think pple are a lot more selfish now everyone wants what they want they too competitive to sit around a family dinner table everyone lives seperate lives so no jokes or times spent so drift drift and some family members you just don’t want to be around they turn in to selfish adults
You are just having a hard time realizing things change even if you do not want them to. You need to live in the present. Disown is a bit much. Everyone has their own lives to live and different interests than you. I have a friend who likes to talk about the old days and all the fun we had. I have no interest in that. Life moves on and we need to move on
‘One side’ is what someone says who has never been disowned for no apparent reason with no explanations, many attempts to reconnect, many times asking why?, getting gaslit answers, feeling like an outsider despite years of giving and giving. You might make the final move to say enough is enough, but you have been disowned. Not too strong a sentiment at all.
They opened the stores on Sundays. That didn't help. I wish they would close everything on Sunday again. It was peaceful and our family always got together.
I don't even have to do anything and people take a dislike to me. My family has basically disowned me. Heaven forbid I try to stick up for myself. I have 1 friend since Jr high. And she disrespected me this last Christmas. I don't fit in anywhere including churches. I am 63 and I have isolated myself for quite a long time now. My parents are gone. My pets are why I am still here.
You are not alone. Most people suck.
Maybe they don't dislike you but are jealous of you for some reason. Jealous leads to dislike and when you stick up for yourself maybe the truth hurts their ears! Nothing like having unconditional love that only a pet knows how to give, they never hurt you.
Most of us don't know why there are estrangements..
Suzy , we are here for u if I want to chat. I'm going through the same things
@lorra222 yes, many of us are
One of ten kids, best childhood, loads of family, cousins, so so many special times, took them all for granted, thought it would always be that way; so many babies born into my family of 6 brothers and 3 sisters. We were always friends, always. We hung around together, got older, still close. Our Mom died 20 years ago and it broke our hearts. We loved her so much, she was hilarious and didn’t even know it, that Irish sense of humor was just too darn funny.. 5 of my 6 brothers married Italian girls, and they had huge families. Such an unbelievable combo, Irish/Italian. It was fabulous. We fought over my Mother we all wanted her to come with us on vacation. Her birthday was an event, so much so that we celebrate her birthday to this day. It’s still her birthday, right? We get together and have a party, a cake, give her cards. We are all still here, all ten of us, my oldest brother has lung cancer and it’s hitting us hard. We truly thought we would always be together.
Time just flew by, woke up one day old, how the hell did THAT happen. Now all OUR children are fascinated by our family. When we are together, that younger generation see us as we always were, our original family. They are fascinated at the dynamics of all of it and see us change into who we were growing up. We were our first family. Thankfully we all still see each other regularly, I absolutely dread losing each other. We had so much fun with each other and still do. Still best friends. Thanks for this nice way to talk to you. Take care, God bless.
I have always found people make time for what is important to them. Sometimes that's not us , time to let them go.
Great video, Phil. I understand completely.
When I was young, we had family dinners where all the cousins got together, everybody hung out, etc. When my grandma died, the family seemed like they all went their separate ways, seeing each other occasionally with basically just Mom's, Dads, and children being together.
When my Mom died a few years ago, it left my sister, Dad and me, and my sister and I had a falling out a few years ago when my Dad was briefly hospitalized because she was trying to override his wishes. He recovered, fortunately, and changed his power of attorney to me because of things that transpired, but my sister and I have barely spoken since, and it feels like I've basically been disowned.
That's okay, though; I'll follow his wishes regardless of consequence, but it looks like once he's gone I'm on my own. It sucks, but i'm in a good place, I work 3 12's a week, and my home is paid for.
I miss the days of having all the family and cousins around, but it seems like nobody has time nor cares to gather like that anymore. I'll probably retire to another country or travel from place to place once I lose my Dad.
Maybe one day I'll find someone to recreate that kind of family, but it seems less and less likely as time passes by.
I get along with my brother and sister. But his kids ..... well they don't like me man. I am 65 yrs. old. It's not a generational thing. Before retiring last August I worked with people the same age. They hated to see me leave. I am stopping going to these family get togethers because I sit there alone and feel like an outsider because his kids won't even talk to me. I am worried my brother won't understand. I was going to have HIS kids as my beneficiaries' but not going to give money to people that dislike me. My point is I understand man. Why are they (people ) like this. ??? I could go on about a lot more but I don't want to bore people. Just glad I found your channel .
❤
After my Moms passing in 2011, I left town, and haven’t spoken to my siblings since. The only damn reason I did talk to them before that, was for my Mothers sake. I’ve never been so happy in my 68 years. These toxic and poisonous life wreckers will never ruin my life again.
I talk about my mother every day and she's been gone 18 years. Don't apologize for talking about your mom.
Yep. When my grandma died....the family fell apart. Hateful, deceitful, jealous of one another. It was like "what just happened?"
My grandma held the family together and yes the extended family always did Sunday dinners together. Sad to see it all fade away, but I too have good memories.
My family have all passed on. My 2 older sisters died way too early. So I was not prepared to be without family. I retired early because of chronic illness so my work family gone. I too rely on childhood memories...once the grandparents & parents died, the family bonds started to dissolve. Family members moved away & moved on. Out of sight, out of mind.
I'm a lone wolf, leaving 6 siblings behind after parents passed. I love my life
Exact same here. Since my sister and mother passed away several years ago our family imploded. The relationships had been very strained for many years and after our mother died there was no desire to carry on the pretense of being a happy family.
this is why it’s important to have your own family.
I'm a boomer. My daughter is around your age. My childhood was near idyllic. My daughter's ..not so much. I divorced my abusive husband when she was two, and I never really got it together after that. Had two more failed marriages. Right now, my 78 y/o brother, his wife, my 55 yo niece, and one cousin (of 42) are all the family I have that don't mind my MAGA politics. I keep thinking I should try writing or talking to my daughter, but then I think "why?" It won't go well. She's 1600 miles away, so there's no face to face possible. I don't ever do Skype or whatever the kids use now. I let the girl go her way. She doesn't hurt me, and I don't hurt her when we don't speak. Sad, but better this way.
I'm 4 years younger than you, and alone. I really enjoy listening to these videos.
I choked when you got stuck on "sand". My problem ALL THE TIME. LOL. :) ang
I was never able to find a wife and I have a job that keeps me 1000 miles away from my folks, so pretty much on my own but I still talk to them on the phone. Had a lot of great memories from childhood and glad that stuff happened. The 80's were a fantastic decade to grow up in. Had I known that glory was temporary, I'd have done whatever I could get get a camcorder and filmed about everything.
Something's gone wrong. People no longer take time for each other, not even respond to email or text messages!
I had four siblings, and my parents raised all of us in a small, three bedroom one bathroom house. Sometimes I STILL marvel that seven people made due with ONE bathroom for all those years. The only income was my Dad's and it wasn't a good job at all. By today's standards we'd be qualified for all the federal and state programs but of course and needless to say, my parents would NEVER, EVER, EVER take a penny of taxpayer money, even if it was available back then, which it wasn't. Yep, we were POOR - like a lot of the families in those middle class neighborhoods back in those days, but like you, we kids never knew it. We never went on vacations other than to visit our cousins across state or down a state for a week. We never went to restaurants, and even a fast food meal was only about once every two months or so. I'd get, along with my brothers, hand me down jeans and other clothes from my cousins who were a couple of years older than us in the mail. It was a way of life for us and millions of other kids growing up in the late fifties and sixties. It was a great childhood and we wanted for nothing, at least us kids. We had no pool or screen house, but a nice, middle class and VERY modest childhood with a nice sized back yard to play in with a TON of other kids on the street and neighborhood. I wouldn't change it for the world, although I know my parents struggled a LOT, and I'd love to have been able to change that. Great video, by the way.
Family may be blood but you don’t have to leave them anything in your will.
When you said your dog had puppies in the house, a picture flashed in my mind. I’m happy to say my favorite scent is puppy breath!
I was going to create my own cologne called you guessed it "Puppy breath" for men.
Obviously the ladies are going to love it :) .
Seriously though, I totally know what you mean. There's something so magnetic about the smell of a puppy
It's the best smell ever.
Probably more accurate to say you were scapegoated than disowned.
Agree
Phil, you are speaking my language. From the great memories of growing up to the present dismantling of the family after the matriarch and patriarch passed away. Sunday dinners at Gram’s were awesome. No one ever had other plans and how we all fit around that one table is hard to believe, but there was always a chair for everyone. Keep sharing the memories. Because they are so similar to mine, they take me back… even to that litter of puppies in the house. 👍😊
reminds me of a bible verse, something about the hearts of men will grow cold in the final days, ungrateful kids, etc
I've been pretty much an orphan since I was seven. I don't know those people.
My family story is as dysfunctional as they come. Parents divorced when I was 10 along with my 6 year old sister. Came up on my mother's side of the family. And, it was pretty damn good for my first 20 years of life. Plenty of trips to Holland in the '60s & '70s (I'm half Dutch) to see Oma & Opa. Precious memories. A whole different world then.
Life is hard. So am I.
The family memories of the good times are priceless. Things have changed in this time we live now. Im 69 and I keep thinking back to the old days! God Bless.
Good vid,Phil.No one can take away your memories.They"re yours forever.
My dad also liked horseshoes, and would play with any willing person. Good memories
Having grown apart is not the same as having been disowned. Developing your own life, as you are obviously doing now, is definitely the way to go.
Proud of being disowned be tr😺🤟😺ash
We're on the same bus my friend. Thanks for the share.
Great video. This almost sums up my life. May you have many more for us to enjoy.
I am 76. My parents are gone & I just finally gave up on my sisters a couple years ago. Same story with me. Nobody likes me & I always was the caretaker. You have to wonder why this is happening to so many people. People seem like just a waste of time anymore. No courage -- no class. Smug, worthless little busy bodies. I like the kids. They've been handed the worst hand of cards, but I think they will make something if it. To my mind, I was always ashamed to be a Boomer. The men were cowards who wouldn't fight in the war & the women were all self-righteous feminists with zero insight into what they actually were & where it was obvious it would lead. Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke! Dana
Thats true saying when that person passed away a piece of the family also passed away. Those times went away, absolutely not the same the family fell and drifted apart.
Being grateful is important if you are wise enough to see it. When we get older, some of us can’t tolerant much drama, so we tend to “peacefully” withdraw more. IMO, Knowing what you can and cannot say to certain family members is key to maintaining those relationships, some of us would rather be real and alone.
hey my brother, from a sister from a different mother. 🙂 I have the same issues with family and friends my whole life, I just never fit in. I'm 61 yo F. recently completed some online test and self diagnosed myself with ASD - autistic syndrome disorder.... high functioning autistic. I retired from the federal government with over 35 years service. I made it but it was very difficult, conflicts with people my whole life...live alone now, have one sister who cares. My moto is Less People Less Trouble. 💕 Bless you my brother xo 🙏
So true, the less people around the less trouble.
It's good u know about ASD now, there r good channels here on YT, do u watch any ? best wishes
Very good video Phil. My family is in some ways together and in other ways apart. Growing up, I lived closer to my mother's relatives and visited them during summer vacation all of the time. Once I turned about 20, I went to a family gathering on my father's side to celebrate the 90th birthday of the matriarch of that side of the family. Everyone on that side was nice and my brother and I learned a lot about our grandparents as well as other cousins of that generation. Today, I'm closer to my father's side of the family since we moved closer to them once my parents retired. I try to visit them at least once a year, but it's been tougher lately due to my parents health.
My family is fragmented now. But, I have countless great memories of our childhood.
I think my family disowned me too.Its just dawning on me.They haven't talked to me in 20 something years.Is that what this is?😮
Yes Phil. And ... some families / relatives can make us ill, the vibes are powerful and telling !!
I have a few old friends and family members who fell into the Trump cult. I had to just let them go. I can't even talk to them because they just start screaming like children at the slightest bit of truth. I didn't change. They did.
Unbelievable- adults fighting over politics. Losing friends and family over politics is a disgrace.
What you don't realize is that you are the one in the cult. The Democrat's abuse of power during the Plandemic should have been enough to keep you from ever voting Democrat ever again and then there is all of their other crimes.
Gen-xer here 49 and experiencing very similar issues, so I completely understand where you are going with this!
patriarch is father, matriarch is mother based. Rose Kennedy was the Matriarch of that famous family.
Same thing happened with both of our families. We're technically estranged from my Mom who is a psycho, hubbies family isn't estranged but they just were never close. His parents were the rock that held it together so once they died, we both didn't bother with any of his siblings. I have no issue seeing them at all, it's just we don't miss them. One is a free-loader and the other sibling is a jerk.
Thanks Phil . Yes, we are lucky to have good old days to remember. Love seeing photo of your dog , she was beautiful.
I'm gay and I'm atheist so lots of people have disowned me. None of them had the stones to say it to my face though. Good riddance I say.
@@spaceghost8995 ya I’ve noticed not too many will say stuff to our faces but glad to say everything behind our backs thanks for sharing
I also have memories of large extended family. All I have left are my siblings. I’m glad for that. Thanks.
You are lucky to have siblings. I have my mother but she probably won't be here much longer. I had two sisters who both passed away, one at the age of 4, the other at the age of 52, both from cancer. My younger brother is a complete asshole and disowned his mother and me 20 years ago.
matriarch, bro. great video. That doggie is someone very special! I have my own furry big boy who keeps me sane and I love to bits.
You must be from New Jersey with that accent. You have a gen x shirt on, I am a boomer myself. I'm like you, older and struggling on my own. We all need to try to remember the good times and forget about the bad.
Absolutely! Losing the matriarch is the beginning of the end:(
My parents were the hub of rhe family, when they passed away a decade ago we went our separate ways. I have few happy memories of my early years, I was regarded as a dropkick even then. It's only Christmas cards now. They showed their true colours when I was barely tolerated for dad's funeral, when my mother died, I was told not to bother turning up at all. I've come to terms with it . Interesting stories.
I'm glad mine disowned me too
My mom passed in 19 dad in 14 great times good stories.
We had a great family. So I thought. My brother and sister and me. As soon as my father died, that was it! It’s like everyone went crazy. No respect anymore and mostly my sister being so mean. My mom had Alzheimer’s and I moved her in with me, and the family fell apart. My mom passed away after a while and I do have my brother. We talk everyday. But family, is totally gone. I don’t have a sister anymore. It’s very sad. I do have great memories though.
Families start falling apart when relatives start moving far apart for many reasons. Better jobs, divorce, attending college , adventure, military service, etc, etc. It's like the friends you have in school after graduation you go your separate ways and for the most part you don't stay in contact with them. The same thing happens with your immediate family. Everyone gets caught up in surviving and dealing with your own immediate family in the location you have chosen for whatever reason. Maybe it is just the way life was supposed to be when we were put here! Who knows?
really good thoughts....thanks for them.
I feel relieved for you.
Phil, nothing like remembering Sundays with Grandma 😊 and the fam! Every family has one piece of sh** person who ruins it for everyone! Your memories are precious! Stay away from these people you’ll never get what you had back….i was born in 1965, and have similar memories! Tuck them away in a special place they are priceless! 😢🎉❤😊
Thanks! Love the videos! Your a very likeable guy!
@@gregdescant4121 thank you very much
Hello Greg.
@FridaKristensen-g4o Hello Frida
@@gregdescant4121 I am doing good, How are you doing this evening?
We have to stay strong, things can change anytime, and you may find people like you do here that see how life can be today with people not being interested. I guess there’s so much shiny stuff out there like phones and cars and work status that people have just lost interest in whats real. It will probably be difficult in the future for the new generations that will never have what we had pre-internet.
Time to move forward and make new memories. Remember Yard Darts?
My left foot remembers lawn darts. Someone tossed one and it ended up going through my shoe and planting itself in the skin between my big toe and the toe next to it. It's crazy to think of some of the things we did as kids. 😀
@@bryanjones8778 😆
I'm Gen X, so the falling back on memories rings true with me. All of these events of the past, the relationships with women, with family, the dogs and cats, the old man and his intrinsic goofy ways. Life is just a blur. It goes by so fast. All we can really do is hold onto those memories until our very own has gone, too. All of which was went. All of which is will too.
The Mother /Grandmother is the Matriarch, she is the foundation and heart of the family..
My family disowned me and I moved out of state with my Wife. She died from cancer a few years later. Since then I discovered my Wife loved playing a victim and trashed me to everyone in sight, especially my family. Sadly I now know she was a malignant covert narcissist who never voiced displeasure with me, yet made up outrageous stories that elicited sympathy from others. She has been gone for 4 years but how do I explain a dead person is to blame for family strive? Won’t I just reinforce what they already believe by conveniently blaming someone who can’t defend themselves? I’m 68 and may take the chance but unsure how to explain it to my family.
but you've nothing to lose in the attempt, surely?
that's a Great Dog
I hold a grudge against my brother. Its been 12 years. All thats happened is Im hurting myself with the rest of the family. I wish there was someway to get over it but I just cant.I have great memories and he has ruined it.
Sounds like my life. 😂
1. I'm confused by your being "disowned" by your family. Doesn't your sister invite you over for Thanksgiving and Christmas? 2. I totally understand your joy in a happy childhood. I'm in my 70s and I often wish I had some good childhood memories. They are all painful.
I have many bad ones and many good ones. I mostly focus on the present, but have blacked out many of the bad times. Still remember the good times and also creating many as we speak.
Those were the good old days. Horseshoes, mention that today and they think it's for good luck over the door! I loved my swing set. Drive around today and you barely see a swing set in the yards. The kids are in the house playing games on the tv. Sliding down the hill after it snowed on a tire tube, nothing like it! Today the kids think that's boring but they don't realize the fun they are missing out on. My father would raise beagels for hunting. Boy was he mad at me because I spoiled them and they would listen to me and not him. Family becomes strangers. Isn't it sad. Your so right when the Mother dies the family fractures. MAMA is the glue to the family. When the siblings meet someone the family fractures. Blue Bloods tv show, those gatherings are no longer, who's got to go here, who's got to go there and other things become more important than family and in a split second your family is gone. You've reached out and did your part so shame on them!
Today is my birthday - I'm now officially 61. I've been thinking about my past an my family, and I am also disowned or ignored. That's fine with me. I'm done trying to please people who could never be pleased. I don't think you can raise a family as we had when we were young. I remember going to my Grandma's house - a teeny tiny row house, and we'd pack in my family of 6 and my uncle's family of 5 + Grandma and Grandpa somehow into that dining room. We'd play Pokeno and laugh - people just don't do that anymore. I want to draw my family closer, and am going to do Sunday dinners/games; hoping to bring back some of that good family ju-ju.
Happy Birthday
@@ChyroneMcThunderschlong Thank you so much!
Hadn't seen you in my feed. Good to see you again. I don't have too many good childhood memories. I was close to a grandfather my whole life. My cousin got all his belongings. I wanted a single item to remember him by and was denied. So much for family.
@@BirdDogey1 glad to have you back
I had no idea that Yankees played horse shoes too- you taught me something- Washers is a fun game too
"Disowned" sounds a bit extreme. If you have a good relationship with your sister you are ahead. Guessing people in your extended family are more self absorbed. Protecting their resources of time/ money. Focused on their own families. Family "Teams" aren't what they use to be. "It takes a village" should apply for all members in the family. Young, old, married, single, divorced etc.
Good luck w your channel brother. Keep your head up
Patriarch/Matriarch - A man/woman who is the head of a family. What? No Bocce?
Horse shoes ? Never heard of that before 😮
it will require you to buy many fewer Christmas gifts...and less birthdays to remember also. It's a good thing.
Since my parents passed I haven't bothered contacting any cousins despite playing together throughout our childhoods. It's not that I dislike them but we have no common interests. The last time was when I met with one cousin at a lunch and we talked for over an hour, I politely asked about stuff he was doing then said bye. Driving home with my wife we both said he spoke for a whole hour about himself and never once asked what we were doing or anything about us. What's the point?
"Read up on this more and more" = hanging out in echo chambers?
Generation X 👍👍👍👍
I feed the blue jays in my back yard. They love peanuts. I call em the blue Jay mafia cuz the run 8-10 deep and keep em all for themselves by hiding them in the yard
I'm still fairly close with my parents and siblings, but they all live very far away from me and each other.
You can’t still be close of your all far away it eats at the bond .
Really Phil. You really feel this way!? Life is short dude. Hard to imagine but imagine yourself laying in a Medicare nursing home. You have no one and broke it’s coming. No visits-is that what you want? Nah nobody wants that
Well.. Getting older is a blessing from God . But families now usually chose to not talk ot get together.
I grew up the same way. Childhood was great but family sucked as adults. Not even funny 😑
What is your position in the family, oldest middle or younger and how many sisters and brothers?
@@annelm217 younger
Matriarchy is woman-centered. 🙂My mother and her sisters and brothers' and cousins got together on some holidays. My father and mother made movies from some of these with an old 8mm Brownie camera. We would watch those over and over again. Wonderful. You may have explained previously, but I don't know why you were disowned. I have heard of parents disowning a child that was gay, lesbian, left a religious cult but you sound like you had a similar childhood to mine which was full of adventure roaming local woods and building camps, hunting, fishing, riding bikes, etc.
No, my fam not together. I commented a bit about it on other vids.
OK. Sounds like a good deal. Now, I don't mean to impose...but do you think they could disown me? I'm kind of an elder orphan so there's nobody left to disown me. Thanks.
SAME
You have to like people first.
Never had it our father terrorized us kids
Xxx
Matriarch.
Remember the Medford Memorial Day bank robbery ?
Arnt you supposed to then move on and create your own family and be that for your children and wife then the kids and grandkids see you as that x
I also think pple are a lot more selfish now everyone wants what they want they too competitive to sit around a family dinner table everyone lives seperate lives so no jokes or times spent so drift drift and some family members you just don’t want to be around they turn in to selfish adults
My mom died two years ago and the family ended
Sorry about the loss of your mom Ian, How are you doing today?
@@FridaKristensen-g4o great!
@@iancarter649 Awesome, What are your plans for the evening?
You are just having a hard time realizing things change even if you do not want them to. You need to live in the present. Disown is a bit much. Everyone has their own lives to live and different interests than you. I have a friend who likes to talk about the old days and all the fun we had. I have no interest in that. Life moves on and we need to move on
That was my interpretation as well, and this is also only one side of the story...
‘One side’ is what someone says who has never been disowned for no apparent reason with no explanations, many attempts to reconnect, many times asking why?, getting gaslit answers, feeling like an outsider despite years of giving and giving. You might make the final move to say enough is enough, but you have been disowned. Not too strong a sentiment at all.
@@garylemure1404 One side is also what someone says when they have only heard one side of a story.
I'm doing good.watching only videos You?
Get a new dog.