Best 4WD Ute Review

The 4WD ute segment is drowning in dogs. But there are only three 4WD utes you should seriously consider buying. So let’s use the hi-tech miracle of objective criteria to process the breed through the automotive abattoir. This is the ultimate 4WD dual-cab ute review and comparison test.
The options are Toyota HiLux, Nissan Navara, Mitsubishi Triton, Ford Ranger, Isuzu D-Max, Holden Colorado, Mazda BT-50, and Volkswagen Amarok. Plus there's the Foton, the Mahindra, the Tata, the Great Wall and the Ssangyong (the great monuments to automotive ugliness).
If you're in the market for a 4WD ute, you are drowning in choice. Nobody has the time to test-drive all 13 - so let's slash the market down to a short-list of three. One clearly in front and a dead heat for second. Can you guess what 4WD ute wins?