My examples of what people surprisingly say to me: A know it all. Smart. Looking through the world with rose colored glasses, Too optimistic. Why are you so happy. Why are you so serious. What is wrong. Slow down. Talk too fast. Move too fast. Too quick. You know that. Always dress nicely. Sexy but don't know it. Too honest. Do not judge others. Sympathetic and why. Generous. Are you tired. You cannot fix the world. Stop complaining. Do not get so passionate about what you say or think. Smile. You know things I do not think about. You are mysterious. You like to hide. You are funny and do not know it. You know a lot of unique words. What does that word mean how do you spell it. What are you talking about. Are you talking to yourself. How do you know they were going to do that. You were right all along. You are easy to talk to. You listen. Where have you been. Why don't you call. Haven't seen you at all. Do you know you are a great writer. You should write a book. Why you do not return my calls. Why you do not pick up your phone. Me, INFJ, Introvert
I wanted to make a list, then I read your comment.. this is scarily accurate.. My style, my distance, my words, my intelligence, talking alone, returning calls, where where you loool all all
bravo. Its missing: you are a very sexy nice guy, and I learn a lot of things with you, and love sex with you, but i will stay with James. Thanks for your thoughtfull gifts, it touched my heart like noone never did.
Holy cow I hear these everyday. I especially related to being too optimistic and pessimistic at the same time. Also people tell me i am too happy and then tell me to smile lol
Here is Ren's list: 1. Smart/intelligent/cerebral 2. You are in your dreams/somewhere else/not present 3. You are not practically intelligent/assembling,fixing things 4. You overthink things/obsess over things 5. You have a kind heart 6. You need more time to make decisions 7. You are observant 8. You are odd/eccentric 9. You are self asorbed 10. You are easily bored 11. You are pre-occupied 12. You are pretentious 13. You are funny 14. You are selfish (I think this is the wrong choice of word?) 15. You are loyal 16. You are flirty 17. You have a feminine sensitivity/temperament 18. You are naive 19. You are discconnected from reality 20. Ask Ren. I heard only 19 items. LOL :/
There is very little there that is positive where does the empathy play its part an insight into anothers feelings surely provides enough information so az to refrain from hurting them or at least communicating in a way that dosnt offend or critise. INFJ have the ability to do that almost instantly. If they care to.
INFJ male here. I’ll add a hurtful one that loved ones keep telling me; “oh you just have an answer for everything.”...it’s not that i have an answer for everything. It’s that i’ve taken the time to consider as many angles and scenarios as possible. Thus being more understanding rather than argumentative.
I am with you on this one. I am often told that I speak as if I am in charge because I know everything about everything and it seems to hurt people around me when I open my mouth and speak. I think it is because doing a lot of alone time I read a lot and the search for different meanings meanings of deeper thought
@@thefanone yes! Exactly! I managed to workout no longer being guilted for my speech and thoughts. I create my thoughts and i create my feelings. Therefore, i have the ability to change them at will. For that reason, i don’t concern myself if someone’s feelings get hurt. Challenge me back or deal with your emotions on your own. “Thy feet in mire Thine head in murk Oh man how piteous thy plight. The doubts that daunt The ills that irk. Thou hast Nor wit Nor will To fight. How hope in heart or worth in work? No star in sight.”
I get this a lot as well. When I'm addressing something people often respond with things that I've already thought about or researched, so I will say "yeah, I know" or "well, actually..." They think I'm just being stubborn, argumentative or a know-it-all, but in reality they advice just wasn't helpful. It weird, people tell me I give great advice and my friends/family seem to praise me on it. But when they try to help me its as if no one can. Usually, if I'm actually looking for advice I'll start the conversation with something like "Hey, can I get your opinion on something?" If I'm not seeking advice, I just want someone to listen. Lol.
"In another world..." "Too serious..." "Judgemental..." "Critical..." "Clever..." "Wise beyond your years..." (when I was younger, a lot) "You're overthinking it..." "Who do you think you are?..." "Eccentric..."
It's interesting, "selfish" has also come up a few times in my life and from what I've gathered it has a lot to do with the fact that I don't like helping people in very physical, practical sort of ways like fixing a car, changing tires, shopping groceries etc but rather with emotional and metaphysical issues but not as many people appreciate that, at least not my family. With friends it's a bit different since I choose them and I'm not really gonna be friends with anyone that has no use for what I have to give
for me is similar but also I think because I like spend a lot of time alone doing my own stuff, my ex wanted to create something with me, but I need for that my own space, I can go watch a movie with you, but when creating I don't necessary want you accompany me. Also physicall help, I don't mind so much unless is not while disturbing my time in my head , parents usually are like,, help me now, and when you make eyeroll, because someone took you out from your dream word just to ask to hold a foil is like awwwww XD that is why I don't like be disturbed, I can do everything just let me do it in my own time when I am on earth.
In my experience the "selfish" label comes when you finally get the courage to say "I see your point, but I'm going to try to do this my way anyway" or you finally get to claim the space and time you need as an INFJ to function properly.
Yes! I was always laughed at and people thought I was stupid in school. Socially, yes. I would have to agree and I think I used to "play" dumb because I was just interested in other things.
Interesting that you say less tactful, cause.. I have heard this a few times, and.. always a similar type person. I don’t know the type, but.. Very procedural, my way or else, type people.. and they are constantly butting heads with everyone around them. I’ve never heard it said by anyone I thought was smart. What I have heard from smart people is different.. I think back to learning to play bridge, it was more of a reason behind it, they noticed I did something they knew wasn’t rational, and they then would say that I should have known it wasn’t rational then give the reason why, which.. maybe only sounds subtlety different, I learned something from one, and automatically didn’t listen to the other.
Right? fortunately for 'them' we know how to shut it down...for the sake of peace, of course. "It is only with the heart that one can see rightly" anyway...so why bother throwing pearls to swine? Not coming from a judgement stance, it's more from a place of reality within this worlds diversity. And, also, of our constancy in not actually 'knowing'. Letting it go, for me, is an inner trust that all that is fated to be said and done, will in time, come forward in the 'end'...whatever that is. [Blah blah blah] Patience and Trust=Best Friends!
For 60 years, the most common thing still told to me is you're too sensitive. Other repetitive ones: you're intimidating, you're intense, are you sad?, are you mad?, you're naive, you're too picky, idealist dreamer, wearing rose colored glasses, impractical, distracted, disengaged, confusing, spacey, living in other worlds not reality. Most always critical observations, by their definition. This is a tricky personality to have on this planet. Thanks. Subscribed!
I agree and have heard that in my 70 years the critisims says more about the critic than about you ,it exposes them as a spotlight would. I learnt that later it would have saved me a lot of self doubt and bruising. There are a few who get you very well even for a short while but they are there and I bless them even if Ive never seen them again. Oh my
@@kimjensenable let's say there is no direct blame placed on me, I used to still soak up the potential of all that negativity by just been a party to it.i can't say I've been blamed too many times for things, but in family situations, I'm singled out as the toughest one who they will emotionally wrestle with the most, and take frustrations out on, as I have a larger threshold for torment, until obviously said threshold is maxed and then I'm closed for business.but since I've awakened, I think that threshold has turned to a bottomless pit...crazy
it might be because they are afraid that their shell might be breached and that you´re easier for them to load their fears off on. Im a martyr myself at times, can see things coming long way and even if i tried to reason with em i let em do it just to stabilize their feelings and hoping that they will learn from their mistakes one day, which happens at times when they come back and realized what ive been trying to say or do
I get these a lot: "You're naive; You're too idealistic/not realistic; You don't live in the real world; You're digging too deep into it/it's not that complicated; Don't over-complicate things; You dream too big; Why don't you try going out once in a while; Stop worrying so much/There's no use worrying about it that much; How can you be so organized *and* disorganized at the same time; Your writing is pretentious; You need to be more tactful; Not everyone thinks the same way you do; etc, etc, etc. Most of my feedback relative to being an INFJ indicates that I severely lack skills in Se and "being present" in the world. I often can't even bring myself to do the dishes and yet I'll be doing some serious mental work on racism or other tough topics. I am insanely organized in my work, but you can bet that my house is messy- not dirty, just messy. The tactfulness issue seems to follow me from place to place- I've been told I'm not kind enough to my coworkers whereas in my own head I'm just trying to pursue the truth or get to the point. I hate wasting time on small talk and, to me, I'm just trying to make a point. I also find that people just...don't understand my intentions. I *never* have intent to hurt someone or their feelings, but I think sometimes the way I say things comes across that way. I think a lot of people find me annoying due to my unpredictability and unconventional personality, so I have a really hard time making friends. They just don't live in the same space as I do, it seems.
"Funny" "Detached" "Diplomatic" "Weird" (I'm proudest of this - I totally own it) "Smart" "All-rounder" (until they know me better) "Creative" "Level-headed" "Unique" "Approachable" "Patient" "Determined" "Naïve" "Deep" "Long-winded"
I stopped watching the news on tv as soon as I moved out of my parents home. It is a gift to be able to see through the media, the control and enjoy my own, albeit naive reality.
Literally 100% accurate for me too. How can it be, that a young French guy, a middle aged American woman and young Danish guy can be that fundamentally alike? Trippy. =]
The Devil is in the details. We are all of the same garden, and yet the individual flower of our very selves holds its own beauty for all to enjoy. I see God in every flower...every flower IS the Garden. Wondrous!
"I cant believe I'm telling you this!" "How did you KNOW that!" "You come across as reserved."(HA!;) *Surprised at my humour, which can run from dark to delinquent.
My husband often thinks I'm too serious, so when I make jokes he isn't expecting it, but once we connect on that deeper, refreshing level we laugh easily and crack each other up. It's just difficult for me to get out of my head and to lay down the things that are plaguing my thoughts. I feel like if I haven't figured the whole world out and how to save it then I can't give those thoughts a break. I think many INFJs make other people uncomfortable because of their excessive mindfulness (the strive for perfection, for wholeness, for something truly enlightened and revolutionary). "Normies" can be so complacent, lukewarm, and accepting of their perceived limitations. I seriously identify with this list. Perhaps the best way to intrigue an INFJ is to ask one to start thinking aloud.. ask them what they obsess over! Lol
You missed one, Ren. You are passionate. All infjs are. Touch on our passions and we'll be your new bff. I'm Canadian, and the French have a matchless je ne sais quoi. I've been told I'm smart. I have a BA in English and Scottish lit/early modern history. But it confuses me when people say that because I just love learning, and if they read the same books I did, they would be smart too.
I think the intelligence come in the application of knowledge, not merely having it. One may read the same books but not actually chew up and digest the information received. I think that most Americans (I’m American) prefer their information to be predigested for them; thinking is hard!! No one can tell a true INFJ what to think - ever. Something that was a comfort to me was that 70% of the world is sensate! That explained a lot of why I felt like I never fit in!!
Hello Renaud! I definitely resonate with being told I'm elitist or aloof, having "high" or superior tastes in the arts, and am just "different" 🤷🏾♀️. I appreciate hearing your story told through this list and the wonderful ways INFJ shows up in various cultures. Thank you.
So relatable. The one i hear often: You think too much, stop worring about the future, what if what if not, you are a perfectionist, i didnt know you were there XD, you are the only one that noticed that, you are always stress, you have the music inside.
Odd, preoccupied, smart, harsh, intimidating, kind, old soul, sarcastic, committed,naive, I wink alot but in a friendly way but people think I'm flirting Lol . I laughed alot at " stylish only because I'm french"
Here's some of my most heard: You think too much. You are sweet. You have the patience of Job. You are so kind/compassionate. You can relate to anyone - you have such diverse friends. You are so nice. You are talented. You beat yourself up. You are judgy. You are like a leaf in the wind. You have a good heart. You are self-absorbed. You are in your head too much. You are people-centered. You are like Snow White (animals and children love you). You are so creative. You are sensitive. You are so brave in your honesty. You are authentic/real.
I've heard all that Ren..fascinating mind, quirky, standoutish,annoyingly right,stubborn,harsh critic,fiery when crossed too often,surprising, self fulfilling, non conformity to current trends and all the good stuff too. I think we are situationally adaptable and don't get enough praise.although not needed not sought after, I'm very well aware it's not given. Great list Ren:)
Odd, Eccentric, yes I get that too. My girl friend, bless her, has to repeat herself all the time because I am ALWAYS in my own head. I am super into philosophy too but I don't get called pretentious much, this might be because I am hyper aware of my company and tend to error toward their capabilities.
I believe I am an INFJ but I am very strongly practical and even as a child this was much more visible than it was with my peers. I just always thought it was because I am a perfectionists and would not allow my self the option of not being able to do something practical or artistic.
Oh my god, that’s my story, too! So good to hear from someone else! I started a new job and tried to fit in socially. I noticed that they found me strange. Now half a year later i‘m totally integrated, but just yesterday we were making fun of each other and everyone got teased for a trait. Mine was „being from another world“. Why, just why? 😫😉
"ah but you are not stupid as I was thinking" one of my bosses told me that when I was 19. "Are you listening?"(the teachers when I was student) are you here? (Anyone that try to talk to me) "you don't feel shy, you are too confident" (coworkers).
Pshhhh I can relate to every one of these! The self absorbed one really made me heart broken for a longggg time! I DO care and often think about others but I am a writer and a majority of my time and energy goes into solitude and my writing. But my hopes and intentions are to touch hearts through my writing. Soooo...in a material and tangible way..yeah I can totally see why people see me that way. But i think we just use our gifting and "way we are" in very different and thoughtful ways than most can relate or comprehend. Under the radar.
Same. I spend so much time thinking about others and worrying about their problems trying to find a solution to fix it all but I guess I'm a bit bad at showing it - especially in a practical way. My style is to write a emotional letter or poem or give something else I made with all my heart. Or of course acting as the counselor.. ^^
I have been told that I am smart, Kind heart, very patient, think differently, too happy, very optimistic, in my own world, have different veiws, funny, selfish (self absorbed), I do what I promise, a flirt (though I don't know it), naive, Growing up my sister told me many times that I was weird. Also when I was young, people would ask "Are you for real?"
When I don't find meaning or interest in a convo, I automatically tune it out. I can't help it. XD The comedy skit I'm imagining in my head is much more fun.
I’m a INTJ, I relate to most of this but when talking about interest in people I’m generally more interested in things and what they do and how they work. But I can see I’m very similar to the INFJ, in fact my father in law has this personality and is even much more intelligent than I being he’s a doctor CMO and I’m a electrician who loves all the trades, but he lacks the mechanical skill and his skill is really towards taking care of people and mine taking care of things. Awesome video, thanks.
Thanks Richard! I appreciate your comment. It's really no surprise you should feel similar to the INFJ, given that both types are Ni dominant. In many ways they are the most similar types, though they act upon their intuition in different ways. In my upcoming book on the INFJ I offer a number of comparisons with the INTJ, should you be interested.
Yes, we're brothers in all that. Thank you Renaud. The "selfish" comment means that you value and protect your time knowing that using it the way you are compelled to as an INFJ is more important than any other "trivial" uses of your time. Why? Because if you protect the way you're using your time, rather than spending that time helping others with surface value needs, it will be of greater benefit to that person in the long run. It's actually selfless, not selfish. They just don't realize that yet. But of course we must try hard to take the time to be kind and present with others so we feel joy in that as well. It's just hard to do at times.
I can relate to what you described here, I recently found out I have this personality type and have been trying to learn as much as possible about other INFJs. Thank you for making this video, it's nice to see someone who has the same behaviors and drives as I do.
I get alot that "I can't be myself around you." More things people say to me is I talk to fast, I'm a know it all, to smart for my own good, and I don't let people be who they are.
Do you think INFJs are necessarily practically useless? My INTP husband is genuinely practically useless, he's put things together literally BACKWARDS on several occasions, even with the instructions. I don't *like* to do practical things, but my Se is so well developed, I think when I do put my hand to something practical, I usually accomplish it to perfection (because I'm a perfectionist). For example, my husband is a downright dangerous driver because he's so stuck inside his head, but I am one of the best drivers I know. I seem to take in absolutely everything around me and react very quickly. I'm physically uncoordinated, in line with INFJ descriptions, but I seem to have a knack for home improvements and the like. Certainly not anywhere near like my SJ/SP friends, but still night and day different to my poor INTP love! Oh, the best example of my strong S is that I moonlight as a proofreader. I never miss a thing when it comes to English text, grammatically, syntactically, and stylistically. My own writing is virtually mistake-free.
When i need to fix something by hitting it really hard, i usually get told "Are you afraid of hurting it" or similiar. Well, they're half right, cuz i'm bad at controlling power output that i'm afraid of breaking it further rather than fixing. Being sensitive, i usually doing things gently and quietly.
I think most of those were spot on... My wife's favorite comment.... Can you come back to earth please. You even pill off some of the typical INFJ facial expressions in this video. Thanks for sharing. I love knowing I am no longer alone in this.... Alien world (😂)
Driving license!! Lmaooooo i failed 3 times before getting mine. That's so funny. I always just thought i was just a slow learner, but I guess infjs are better at things not linked to physical reality, but in their minds.
Are we seen as naive because we value harmony more than caring about who is right and who is wrong? I’m usually afraid I’ll embarrass the person and I’ll heed my words especially so when in public or with a group of people and even more so when it’s a person I admire/adore. Perhaps we are being more forgiving than naive. Just a thought.
No... it’s because you never thought to intentionally harm anyone in any way to benefit yourself or someone else. It doesn’t come naturally. It shouldn’t. It hurts to have to find that one out.
The other day my therapist mentioned that I may not be finding what I’m looking for on dating apps because people just aren’t “cerebral”. Lol. So, yes that’s one I relate to.
Thank you. I took the MB test a few months ago. It was such a relief to know I'm not alone. Now coping with several realizations, and even more clarity, which has been a bit much. I wish I didn't have this.
Haha, me too! It wasn't even because driving the car itself was that difficult, it was driving the car like the instructor wanted me to, which proved the greatest challenge to me (don't be too careful, be decisive but not too decisive, don't drive on the sidewalk etc. etc.).
Yep...performance anxiety. It's like, 'Who are these 'people' monitoring my every move?' Like they are my superior or...Oh...yeah...Driving Tester. [Jerks!]
Very interesting idea! Like it very much. Yeah, 4 - obsessing about things, may be very likely an Ti thing. Ti really needs much time to Verify what the real and actual truth is, and then even pondering and evaluating its value, to finally come into our "integrated system of Facts." Contrary to Fi, which is more about Values & Beliefs. Thanks
Talented. People have told me this too often. I feel it’s a word that is a hard one to live up to. Talent means, to some, you own it, and if you own something, it would be a natural thing to assume the sharing of it. I can feel like talent is similar to anything else, continuing development. A practicing. To practice IS to share. Maybe to me.
Oh well, I realising, that my own internal world, universe, multiverse is way better, than real world, because I can make utopia, than modern world, that I living in and makes me indifferent, because our planet are unbalanced, full of injustice, and somewhat crazy, because of majority people, unless, then traveling to different countries, and can make for me so magical and you can escape from harsh reality
I have almost never been bored in my life and yes my language is not limited to current jargon.I ca relate to just about every point and would include despite the "self absorbed" is contridicted N.Y. your outstanding and acute observation which iz happening all the time .of coure you will come accross as disconnected of course you are not you are so multileveledly connected simutaneously it is out of most others realm of conciousess they cant relate to it as they dont and never have bee there.All those observations testify to their lack of cognition. Glad you have a great deal ofcourage as well.Enjoy and resoate and identify with just about 100% would love ti know your thoughts on creativity inventiveness and imagination. Thanks again for all ontent.
I'm often told that I look arrogant because apparently I have a RBF. But when people meet me, they say that I'm actually nice. I also have a weird sense of humour tbh. I've been somehow told that I'm selfish. I'm known to be considerate. I rarely interact with people, even family members. During family gatherings, I tend to keep to myself. I've been told that I'm smart even though I don't feel as such
Yup: You’re in your head. You’re quiet/shy/introverted 🤮 You’re smart. You’re funny. You’re mysterious. You need to stop dwelling on/obsessing over ____ (item I’ve overthinking). You’re too nice. You look busy (nice way to say stressed/preoccupied). I am definitely easily bored. If it’s not very cerebral, no thanks. I have better things to discuss than to shoot the breeze about the weather etc. I don’t care for superficial/small talk. Definitely have a more pretentious vocabulary and interests. In some ways yeah could be seen as less accessible and self-absorbed. Definitely loyal once my loyalty is gained. Lol I have no idea of my style but I’m definitely a bit different from the others in a crowd, not dressed the same at all. Naive...well sometimes I do take things a bit more literally than they’re meant 😊 and disconnected...it depends. I avoid the news any more as it’s almost all bad, so sometimes I won’t know anything unless I see it via social media
Me too brother. I always tell ppl nothing personal, but i need lone time....that's common with lone wolves..when someone is park next to me i can't focus on what I need, im like a magnet so therefore I find another parking space
I find so interesting to watch your videos because your body language is the same as mine and this is a little eerie yet I think we would be really good friends
Things i was told: "i was scared of you before i got to know you", "why are you not initiating phone calls or meetings?", "Why are you sitting so far, get closer".
Thank you very much for this comprehensive list,I relate to all of your points,I was trying to figure out your slight accent,thought you sound maybe a bit Irish,thank you for the clue in the video☺️ also I most struggle with the last point,I’m always that random girl for the situation and don’t really fit in most of the time,give people impression that I’m way too naive,I can’t take anymore their irrational reactions and try to avoid meeting ‘strangers’,I realize I can only safely socialize in private where I’m introduced to people by someone who already knows them,when I have to personally assert myself to a complete stranger and and have that initial small talk their lack of boundaries and sexualizing my ‘INFJ stare’ is just disastrous...i have women of my mothers age coming on to me sexually and telling me they are bisexual 5minutes into conversation...yep that’s how they ‘figured’ me out...😖
@@lilydarling4215 ahahahah thats what this comment did for me.. Now I realise I'm not the only one who gets told not to stare and gives people the wrong impression. Especially that I'm in love with them... XD
I'm not lacking in practical applications IE; I'm pretty good at fixing things, but my approach is often intuitive...It is as of i'm applying the same approach to things as I do to people, with a pretty good success rate. I like and appreciate manuals, but rarely read them through. (Same with most books) I sometimes have a blind side with toxic and/or manipulative people. "Cool Hand Luke" comes to mind...I'll often allow things to go too far at my detriment. (Could well be a symptom of unresolved childhood abuse rather than MBTI related). My patterns can often change drastically and for no obvious reason. I am both sentimental and avant garde. Traditional and alien. Predictable and totally from "left field". "Embrace the paradox" is something I say, (and do), quite a bit. Most of my personal projects are left to some degree of incompletion. "Waiting for developments" or "lateral drift"is my interpretation of what others often see as indecision. It is often a matter of being Ying and waiting for the Yang to push, pull or just present an alternative. I've had many experiences that others would consider other worldly, magical, or just plain strange and unbelievable. I suck at meditation and used to envy those that didn't. Now I see that similar results are obtainable if actions are approached thoughtfully. Most of the time, my intentions and actions are misunderstood, even by those that claim to know me well. This thing about INFJ's needing to plan doesn't quite fit with me. I like being prepared for the unexpected, but also enjoy impromptu and totally spontaneous actions. I often have considered sexual activity to be a form of a healing art. This could go on but I'll stop here..
It was a very interesting video. All the traits very much resonate with INFJs. You explained the philosophical part of every trait so well. Thank you very much for sharing your thoughts Ren. It's so good to see subscribers to your channel have been increasing and will be looking forward to see it touch 10k mark and more.
While listening to the intro: let me think, I'm told to be smart, I bet you too. Literally the first on your list: smart. That coincidence made me laugh out loud. It's a compliment but it also adds unwanted pressure as I often end up worrying about the expectations people have towards me. It's the same with every other compliment, actually. I'm also told to be lazy but that comes from "being detached" and "worrying too much (= making up excuses)", plus the "not caring about things that aren't deep or useful for my goal/purpose".
A lot of what you said I can relate to, especially not knowing what is going on around the world, they asked me where do I live or better yet, which planet are you from. That part I always wonder about, the planet thing. for example, a doctor gives medication to make you sleep, I am up all night, or you drink coffee to wake you up, I sleep. so not only is my personality unique but my physiological makeup as well. now that I would consider weird
In my analysis all of those things you say are true but I have analyzed it about myself as well that people don't usually tell us these things we conclude these things from people's expressions and reactions. May be once in a very long while a person might say one of these things but it's most of the time me myself that concludes it out of people's speech.
Being an INFJ is one thing. Being an INFJ and a true Capricorn at the same time with Capricorn Sun, Cancer moon, Venus in Aquarius and Capricorn Ascendant Yah now that's another thing right there
“Wow, you’re overthinking this. You couldn’t know any details about this situation so you must be making it up and stressing yourself out for no reason.” Turns out I was right about X, person then gaslights me and pretends I never predicted said outcome. And repeat.
I don't believe in soul mates however I don't think the belief in it would make one naive. Just like one who is religious shouldn't be conceived as naive no matter the contradictories one might have in said belief.
Can relate to so many of these things. The most common things I am told is "you're very intense" and "you would make a lousy poker player - everything shows in your face."
Can't disagree with any of these. Self absorbed though, not so sure. Usually if we are lost in our heads it is about other people. We can be seen as loners and that is because we just have a thing where we can dearly love our friends, but the barrier in our heads that we have to climb over to go out is so high, that we might not see them for a long time!
Hashtag over analyzing....lmao Gotta think things down to the core. I do need time to make decisions sometimes. I see through people's psychological state. Topics need to be in-depth or ya...it's boring lol. Lol resting BF I've been told my whole life...it's me thinking guuuys!!! You definitely need odd humour to appreciate us lol. Becoming a professional photographer gave way to me learning to not be "selfish" ya we are not selfish. Lol Just in our own world's Loyal for sure. People think I'm flirting more then what I am. As a female. It has proven dangerous. Always been called niave. We are spirits living a human experience. Mkay! Keep up the good work! Love the channel so much! Call me selfish... hahahaha Cheers
im not. really that smart,i got into nutrition,eating healthy, the immune system,mental health etc.........and 1400 hours of study feel better about myself,3years ago i think i was kind of ignorant about life i do want to learn things now, almost like im starting to grow up after all im only 68 thank you for the video
Everybody is not like you… No one thinks like you… You are the exception to the rule… You’re coldhearted… You’re weird… You’re passionate.. You hate stupid people, not everyone can be like you…
I can assemble things and be in situations like you described without much difficulty but driving was hard for me it took me two tries to get my driver's license but I was able to get my class b CDL to drive a school bus in one shot... But I have a problem at times with common sense and I used to get frustrated about it now I just laughed it off and those who love me know that it just comes with the package LOL!
I’ve been told many of these. I’ve been called naive but also manipulative! I think that was missed on the list. Ive been called manipulative many times. I think because I don’t really know myself who I am so I become who I feel I need to be. How can one be naive and manipulative though? They’re kind of contradictory…. Also my husband tells me I live in my own world all the time, especially when we argue haha. I reluctantly agree.
Links to purchase my book on the INFJ are provided in the description box.
Thank you for your support ♥
My examples of what people surprisingly say to me: A know it all. Smart. Looking through the world with rose colored glasses, Too optimistic. Why are you so happy. Why are you so serious. What is wrong. Slow down. Talk too fast. Move too fast. Too quick. You know that. Always dress nicely. Sexy but don't know it. Too honest. Do not judge others. Sympathetic and why. Generous. Are you tired. You cannot fix the world. Stop complaining. Do not get so passionate about what you say or think. Smile. You know things I do not think about. You are mysterious. You like to hide. You are funny and do not know it. You know a lot of unique words. What does that word mean how do you spell it. What are you talking about. Are you talking to yourself. How do you know they were going to do that. You were right all along. You are easy to talk to. You listen. Where have you been. Why don't you call. Haven't seen you at all. Do you know you are a great writer. You should write a book. Why you do not return my calls. Why you do not pick up your phone. Me, INFJ, Introvert
This is scary accurate to me too 😶
I wanted to make a list, then I read your comment.. this is scarily accurate..
My style, my distance, my words, my intelligence, talking alone, returning calls, where where you loool all all
ElusvOptmst1 Hahahah!!! So dang true. I love it
bravo. Its missing: you are a very sexy nice guy, and I learn a lot of things with you, and love sex with you, but i will stay with James. Thanks for your thoughtfull gifts, it touched my heart like noone never did.
Holy cow I hear these everyday. I especially related to being too optimistic and pessimistic at the same time. Also people tell me i am too happy and then tell me to smile lol
Here is Ren's list:
1. Smart/intelligent/cerebral
2. You are in your dreams/somewhere else/not present
3. You are not practically intelligent/assembling,fixing things
4. You overthink things/obsess over things
5. You have a kind heart
6. You need more time to make decisions
7. You are observant
8. You are odd/eccentric
9. You are self asorbed
10. You are easily bored
11. You are pre-occupied
12. You are pretentious
13. You are funny
14. You are selfish (I think this is the wrong choice of word?)
15. You are loyal
16. You are flirty
17. You have a feminine sensitivity/temperament
18. You are naive
19. You are discconnected from reality
20. Ask Ren. I heard only 19 items. LOL :/
There is very little there that is positive where does the empathy play its part an insight into anothers feelings surely provides enough information so az to refrain from hurting them or at least communicating in a way that dosnt offend or critise. INFJ have the ability to do that almost instantly. If they care to.
reletable
New to your channel. Have watched a few videos and was leaning towards INFP. And this video is the nail in the coffin😬.
you have style after loyal:)
INFJ male here. I’ll add a hurtful one that loved ones keep telling me; “oh you just have an answer for everything.”...it’s not that i have an answer for everything. It’s that i’ve taken the time to consider as many angles and scenarios as possible. Thus being more understanding rather than argumentative.
I am with you on this one. I am often told that I speak as if I am in charge because I know everything about everything and it seems to hurt people around me when I open my mouth and speak. I think it is because doing a lot of alone time I read a lot and the search for different meanings meanings of deeper thought
@@thefanone yes! Exactly! I managed to workout no longer being guilted for my speech and thoughts. I create my thoughts and i create my feelings. Therefore, i have the ability to change them at will. For that reason, i don’t concern myself if someone’s feelings get hurt. Challenge me back or deal with your emotions on your own.
“Thy feet in mire
Thine head in murk
Oh man how piteous thy plight.
The doubts that daunt
The ills that irk.
Thou hast
Nor wit
Nor will
To fight.
How hope in heart or worth in work?
No star in sight.”
I get this a lot as well. When I'm addressing something people often respond with things that I've already thought about or researched, so I will say "yeah, I know" or "well, actually..." They think I'm just being stubborn, argumentative or a know-it-all, but in reality they advice just wasn't helpful.
It weird, people tell me I give great advice and my friends/family seem to praise me on it. But when they try to help me its as if no one can.
Usually, if I'm actually looking for advice I'll start the conversation with something like "Hey, can I get your opinion on something?" If I'm not seeking advice, I just want someone to listen. Lol.
Ykhr contribution reveals their shortfall not yours but yes it is a hurtfull response.
The same, or You Know Everything,
"In another world..."
"Too serious..."
"Judgemental..."
"Critical..."
"Clever..."
"Wise beyond your years..." (when I was younger, a lot)
"You're overthinking it..."
"Who do you think you are?..."
"Eccentric..."
a lot of those sound like gaslighting from a narcissist because they're secretly jealous of INFJs and they know we have the power to take them down
@@narcpoacher7708 how can you take them down? The inly way to deal with a narcissist is run!
Spot on
@@monkeybearmax Thank you. Unfortunately, there are quite a few YT video uploaders who present misleading notions such as that about INFJs!
It's interesting, "selfish" has also come up a few times in my life and from what I've gathered it has a lot to do with the fact that I don't like helping people in very physical, practical sort of ways like fixing a car, changing tires, shopping groceries etc but rather with emotional and metaphysical issues but not as many people appreciate that, at least not my family. With friends it's a bit different since I choose them and I'm not really gonna be friends with anyone that has no use for what I have to give
for me is similar but also I think because I like spend a lot of time alone doing my own stuff, my ex wanted to create something with me, but I need for that my own space, I can go watch a movie with you, but when creating I don't necessary want you accompany me. Also physicall help, I don't mind so much unless is not while disturbing my time in my head , parents usually are like,, help me now, and when you make eyeroll, because someone took you out from your dream word just to ask to hold a foil is like awwwww XD that is why I don't like be disturbed, I can do everything just let me do it in my own time when I am on earth.
This blew my mind, i came here just to sat this!
"style"
In my experience the "selfish" label comes when you finally get the courage to say "I see your point, but I'm going to try to do this my way anyway" or you finally get to claim the space and time you need as an INFJ to function properly.
"How can someone so smart, be so stupid?"
...or something similar.
Perhaps the company I kept was less tactful than yours Ren.
Sounds like it! As long as this doesn't hurt you :)
yeah me too
Yes! I was always laughed at and people thought I was stupid in school. Socially, yes. I would have to agree and I think I used to "play" dumb because I was just interested in other things.
holyyy this isnso accurate my friends tell me that alot
Interesting that you say less tactful, cause.. I have heard this a few times, and.. always a similar type person. I don’t know the type, but.. Very procedural, my way or else, type people.. and they are constantly butting heads with everyone around them. I’ve never heard it said by anyone I thought was smart. What I have heard from smart people is different.. I think back to learning to play bridge, it was more of a reason behind it, they noticed I did something they knew wasn’t rational, and they then would say that I should have known it wasn’t rational then give the reason why, which.. maybe only sounds subtlety different, I learned something from one, and automatically didn’t listen to the other.
Funny. Might I add "Know it all" to the list. If they only knew how much I hold back ;)
haha exactly.
Haha, so relatable!
Right? fortunately for 'them' we know how to shut it down...for the sake of peace, of course. "It is only with the heart that one can see rightly" anyway...so why bother throwing pearls to swine? Not coming from a judgement stance, it's more from a place of reality within this worlds diversity. And, also, of our constancy in not actually 'knowing'. Letting it go, for me, is an inner trust that all that is fated to be said and done, will in time, come forward in the 'end'...whatever that is. [Blah blah blah] Patience and Trust=Best Friends!
I keep pearls close to my guarded heart...
@@billkress2606 as you should! Not everyone cares to look deep enough to assimilate the pearls at a level the deserve to be
For 60 years, the most common thing still told to me is you're too sensitive. Other repetitive ones: you're intimidating, you're intense, are you sad?, are you mad?, you're naive, you're too picky, idealist dreamer, wearing rose colored glasses, impractical, distracted, disengaged, confusing, spacey, living in other worlds not reality. Most always critical observations, by their definition. This is a tricky personality to have on this planet. Thanks. Subscribed!
Thanks for subscribing, Carol! ;-)
SO RELATABLE !
I agree and have heard that in my 70 years the critisims says more about the critic than about you ,it exposes them as a spotlight would. I learnt that later it would have saved me a lot of self doubt and bruising. There are a few who get you very well even for a short while but they are there and I bless them even if Ive never seen them again. Oh my
@@philomenaward1833 ❤️
Sensitive, too caring, people pleaser, know-it-all, clumsy, attractive, insightful, forgetful, (names and losing things) up in the clouds.
In most situations I'm always the one to blame/bad guy to people
I think we appear so strong that we can be the bearers of the brunt of things unfortunately
Are you absolutely sure that you are, indeed, the one blamed?...or...do you Carry the blame within you? As for me, it is the latter.
@@kimjensenable let's say there is no direct blame placed on me, I used to still soak up the potential of all that negativity by just been a party to it.i can't say I've been blamed too many times for things, but in family situations, I'm singled out as the toughest one who they will emotionally wrestle with the most, and take frustrations out on, as I have a larger threshold for torment, until obviously said threshold is maxed and then I'm closed for business.but since I've awakened, I think that threshold has turned to a bottomless pit...crazy
it might be because they are afraid that their shell might be breached and that you´re easier for them to load their fears off on. Im a martyr myself at times, can see things coming long way and even if i tried to reason with em i let em do it just to stabilize their feelings and hoping that they will learn from their mistakes one day, which happens at times when they come back and realized what ive been trying to say or do
I get these a lot:
"You're naive; You're too idealistic/not realistic; You don't live in the real world; You're digging too deep into it/it's not that complicated; Don't over-complicate things; You dream too big; Why don't you try going out once in a while; Stop worrying so much/There's no use worrying about it that much; How can you be so organized *and* disorganized at the same time; Your writing is pretentious; You need to be more tactful; Not everyone thinks the same way you do; etc, etc, etc.
Most of my feedback relative to being an INFJ indicates that I severely lack skills in Se and "being present" in the world. I often can't even bring myself to do the dishes and yet I'll be doing some serious mental work on racism or other tough topics. I am insanely organized in my work, but you can bet that my house is messy- not dirty, just messy. The tactfulness issue seems to follow me from place to place- I've been told I'm not kind enough to my coworkers whereas in my own head I'm just trying to pursue the truth or get to the point. I hate wasting time on small talk and, to me, I'm just trying to make a point. I also find that people just...don't understand my intentions. I *never* have intent to hurt someone or their feelings, but I think sometimes the way I say things comes across that way. I think a lot of people find me annoying due to my unpredictability and unconventional personality, so I have a really hard time making friends. They just don't live in the same space as I do, it seems.
I get you. Change your environment and people. Probably to much Sensing in your life.
I completely relate to every part of this. I wish I knew an INFJ in real life just so I could talk with someone who understands.
If you heard yourself your empathy might just save you by letting you hear what another hears you can learn to temper your speech.
"Funny"
"Detached"
"Diplomatic"
"Weird" (I'm proudest of this - I totally own it)
"Smart"
"All-rounder" (until they know me better)
"Creative"
"Level-headed"
"Unique"
"Approachable"
"Patient"
"Determined"
"Naïve"
"Deep"
"Long-winded"
I stopped watching the news on tv as soon as I moved out of my parents home. It is a gift to be able to see through the media, the control and enjoy my own, albeit naive reality.
Literally 100% accurate. How can it be that a young French guy and a middle aged American woman can be that fundamentally alike? Trippy.
Literally 100% accurate for me too. How can it be, that a young French guy, a middle aged American woman and young Danish guy can be that fundamentally alike? Trippy. =]
This is the beauty of the INFJ type perhaps! ^_^
@@kristianjensen5877 Hahahahaha! Kristian...Hey darling boy, I'm a Jensen as well! So, how can it be, that...etc...infinitum...
The Devil is in the details. We are all of the same garden, and yet the individual flower of our very selves holds its own beauty for all to enjoy. I see God in every flower...every flower IS the Garden. Wondrous!
kim jensen Very well said! 😀
"I cant believe I'm telling you this!"
"How did you KNOW that!"
"You come across as reserved."(HA!;)
*Surprised at my humour, which can run from dark to delinquent.
Since I was little it was:
You're off in your own world again.
Know-it-all
Too deep
Mysterious or Secretive
A silly oddball
Using weird words ^^
A lot of people have called me a poseur or pretentious. I’ve learned to embrace it.
I can make anyone laugh. I wonder if this is because INFJs read people SO WELL.
My husband often thinks I'm too serious, so when I make jokes he isn't expecting it, but once we connect on that deeper, refreshing level we laugh easily and crack each other up. It's just difficult for me to get out of my head and to lay down the things that are plaguing my thoughts. I feel like if I haven't figured the whole world out and how to save it then I can't give those thoughts a break. I think many INFJs make other people uncomfortable because of their excessive mindfulness (the strive for perfection, for wholeness, for something truly enlightened and revolutionary). "Normies" can be so complacent, lukewarm, and accepting of their perceived limitations.
I seriously identify with this list.
Perhaps the best way to intrigue an INFJ is to ask one to start thinking aloud.. ask them what they obsess over! Lol
You missed one, Ren. You are passionate. All infjs are. Touch on our passions and we'll be your new bff. I'm Canadian, and the French have a matchless je ne sais quoi.
I've been told I'm smart. I have a BA in English and Scottish lit/early modern history. But it confuses me when people say that because I just love learning, and if they read the same books I did, they would be smart too.
Hi Tracy, yes - passionate! That’s true, I forgot about that one :)
I think the intelligence come in the application of knowledge, not merely having it. One may read the same books but not actually chew up and digest the information received. I think that most Americans (I’m American) prefer their information to be predigested for them; thinking is hard!! No one can tell a true INFJ what to think - ever.
Something that was a comfort to me was that 70% of the world is sensate! That explained a lot of why I felt like I never fit in!!
@@jenniferduncan-boyden8674 I agree with you 100%, Jennifer!
Hello Renaud! I definitely resonate with being told I'm elitist or aloof, having "high" or superior tastes in the arts, and am just "different" 🤷🏾♀️. I appreciate hearing your story told through this list and the wonderful ways INFJ shows up in various cultures. Thank you.
Weird, people always tell me im weird.
So relatable. The one i hear often: You think too much, stop worring about the future, what if what if not, you are a perfectionist, i didnt know you were there XD, you are the only one that noticed that, you are always stress, you have the music inside.
Odd, preoccupied, smart, harsh, intimidating, kind, old soul, sarcastic, committed,naive, I wink alot but in a friendly way but people think I'm flirting Lol .
I laughed alot at " stylish only because I'm french"
Here's some of my most heard: You think too much. You are sweet. You have the patience of Job. You are so kind/compassionate. You can relate to anyone - you have such diverse friends. You are so nice. You are talented. You beat yourself up. You are judgy. You are like a leaf in the wind. You have a good heart. You are self-absorbed. You are in your head too much. You are people-centered. You are like Snow White (animals and children love you). You are so creative. You are sensitive. You are so brave in your honesty. You are authentic/real.
I've heard all that Ren..fascinating mind, quirky, standoutish,annoyingly right,stubborn,harsh critic,fiery when crossed too often,surprising, self fulfilling, non conformity to current trends and all the good stuff too. I think we are situationally adaptable and don't get enough praise.although not needed not sought after, I'm very well aware it's not given. Great list Ren:)
Odd, Eccentric, yes I get that too. My girl friend, bless her, has to repeat herself all the time because I am ALWAYS in my own head. I am super into philosophy too but I don't get called pretentious much, this might be because I am hyper aware of my company and tend to error toward their capabilities.
very accurate at reading people!
“You have such a unique perspective on life.” hear that a lot in different wordings.
I believe I am an INFJ but I am very strongly practical and even as a child this was much more visible than it was with my peers. I just always thought it was because I am a perfectionists and would not allow my self the option of not being able to do something practical or artistic.
I started a new job, I try very hard to hide my RBF and master socializing, within 5 days I got called „dreamy“.
Oh my god, that’s my story, too! So good to hear from someone else!
I started a new job and tried to fit in socially. I noticed that they found me strange.
Now half a year later i‘m totally integrated, but just yesterday we were making fun of each other and everyone got teased for a trait. Mine was „being from another world“. Why, just why? 😫😉
I hear good heart or kind heart a lot. Sometimes people are baffled by what catches my attention at times.
It seems quite obvious you have a kind heart, Shawn. At least it shows in your writing.
"ah but you are not stupid as I was thinking" one of my bosses told me that when I was 19. "Are you listening?"(the teachers when I was student) are you here? (Anyone that try to talk to me) "you don't feel shy, you are too confident" (coworkers).
Pshhhh I can relate to every one of these! The self absorbed one really made me heart broken for a longggg time! I DO care and often think about others but I am a writer and a majority of my time and energy goes into solitude and my writing. But my hopes and intentions are to touch hearts through my writing. Soooo...in a material and tangible way..yeah I can totally see why people see me that way. But i think we just use our gifting and "way we are" in very different and thoughtful ways than most can relate or comprehend. Under the radar.
That is a great outlet to help others.I am the same in this regard
Same. I spend so much time thinking about others and worrying about their problems trying to find a solution to fix it all but I guess I'm a bit bad at showing it - especially in a practical way. My style is to write a emotional letter or poem or give something else I made with all my heart. Or of course acting as the counselor.. ^^
I have heard them all from the nicest compliments to the rudest most insensitive remarks.
I have been told that I am smart, Kind heart, very patient, think differently, too happy, very optimistic, in my own world, have different veiws, funny, selfish (self absorbed), I do what I promise, a flirt (though I don't know it), naive, Growing up my sister told me many times that I was weird. Also when I was young, people would ask "Are you for real?"
Contradictory/"inconsistent"
Irreverent/too relaxed/even somewhat detached
Indecisive/ambivalent
Involved yet impartial..
Abstract
When I don't find meaning or interest in a convo, I automatically tune it out. I can't help it. XD The comedy skit I'm imagining in my head is much more fun.
I’m a INTJ, I relate to most of this but when talking about interest in people I’m generally more interested in things and what they do and how they work. But I can see I’m very similar to the INFJ, in fact my father in law has this personality and is even much more intelligent than I being he’s a doctor CMO and I’m a electrician who loves all the trades, but he lacks the mechanical skill and his skill is really towards taking care of people and mine taking care of things. Awesome video, thanks.
Thanks Richard! I appreciate your comment. It's really no surprise you should feel similar to the INFJ, given that both types are Ni dominant. In many ways they are the most similar types, though they act upon their intuition in different ways. In my upcoming book on the INFJ I offer a number of comparisons with the INTJ, should you be interested.
Yes, we're brothers in all that. Thank you Renaud. The "selfish" comment means that you value and protect your time knowing that using it the way you are compelled to as an INFJ is more important than any other "trivial" uses of your time. Why? Because if you protect the way you're using your time, rather than spending that time helping others with surface value needs, it will be of greater benefit to that person in the long run. It's actually selfless, not selfish. They just don't realize that yet. But of course we must try hard to take the time to be kind and present with others so we feel joy in that as well. It's just hard to do at times.
I can relate to what you described here, I recently found out I have this personality type and have been trying to learn as much as possible about other INFJs. Thank you for making this video, it's nice to see someone who has the same behaviors and drives as I do.
Thanks to you for watching!
I get alot that "I can't be myself around you." More things people say to me is I talk to fast, I'm a know it all, to smart for my own good, and I don't let people be who they are.
I think our kind hearts are underrated in this world.
Do you think INFJs are necessarily practically useless? My INTP husband is genuinely practically useless, he's put things together literally BACKWARDS on several occasions, even with the instructions. I don't *like* to do practical things, but my Se is so well developed, I think when I do put my hand to something practical, I usually accomplish it to perfection (because I'm a perfectionist). For example, my husband is a downright dangerous driver because he's so stuck inside his head, but I am one of the best drivers I know. I seem to take in absolutely everything around me and react very quickly. I'm physically uncoordinated, in line with INFJ descriptions, but I seem to have a knack for home improvements and the like. Certainly not anywhere near like my SJ/SP friends, but still night and day different to my poor INTP love!
Oh, the best example of my strong S is that I moonlight as a proofreader. I never miss a thing when it comes to English text, grammatically, syntactically, and stylistically. My own writing is virtually mistake-free.
When i need to fix something by hitting it really hard, i usually get told "Are you afraid of hurting it" or similiar. Well, they're half right, cuz i'm bad at controlling power output that i'm afraid of breaking it further rather than fixing. Being sensitive, i usually doing things gently and quietly.
I think most of those were spot on... My wife's favorite comment.... Can you come back to earth please. You even pill off some of the typical INFJ facial expressions in this video. Thanks for sharing. I love knowing I am no longer alone in this.... Alien world (😂)
Driving license!! Lmaooooo i failed 3 times before getting mine. That's so funny. I always just thought i was just a slow learner, but I guess infjs are better at things not linked to physical reality, but in their minds.
I just got turned on to INFJ. I am spending my day getting to know myself with your videos. They are awesome as are you!!!
I get: It's like you can see right through me. We all feel like you care. You are very standoffish/intimidating. I feel like I've known you forever.
Are we seen as naive because we value harmony more than caring about who is right and who is wrong? I’m usually afraid I’ll embarrass the person and I’ll heed my words especially so when in public or with a group of people and even more so when it’s a person I admire/adore. Perhaps we are being more forgiving than naive. Just a thought.
Exactly. I would also say understanding and forgiving.
No... it’s because you never thought to intentionally harm anyone in any way to benefit yourself or someone else. It doesn’t come naturally. It shouldn’t. It hurts to have to find that one out.
Be careful of who said that to you.
The other day my therapist mentioned that I may not be finding what I’m looking for on dating apps because people just aren’t “cerebral”. Lol. So, yes that’s one I relate to.
Thank you. I took the MB test a few months ago. It was such a relief to know I'm not alone. Now coping with several realizations, and even more clarity, which has been a bit much. I wish I didn't have this.
Dude IT LITERALLY TOOK ME 4 CHANCES TO GET MY DRIVERS LICENSE
Haha, me too! It wasn't even because driving the car itself was that difficult, it was driving the car like the instructor wanted me to, which proved the greatest challenge to me (don't be too careful, be decisive but not too decisive, don't drive on the sidewalk etc. etc.).
Are you telling us that you’re a rebel, Kristian? ;)
@@RensRoom ...These aren't the droids you're looking for. =]
Yep...performance anxiety. It's like, 'Who are these 'people' monitoring my every move?' Like they are my superior or...Oh...yeah...Driving Tester. [Jerks!]
Took me 2 tries
I still have my best friend from childhood , I'm 57 years old and we have been friends since we were 5 years old.
I love your honesty, vulnerability and accessibility here. :)
How many INFJ are left handed?
No idea! I'm right-handed anyway.
I am! 👋☺️
Very interesting idea!
Like it very much.
Yeah, 4 - obsessing about things, may be very likely an Ti thing. Ti really needs much time to Verify what the real and actual truth is, and then even pondering and evaluating its value, to finally come into our "integrated system of Facts." Contrary to Fi, which is more about Values & Beliefs.
Thanks
"How did you know that?"
"How do you know her/him?" "What do you think will happen when?"
"Where have you been?"
"What are you doing?"
Talented. People have told me this too often. I feel it’s a word that is a hard one to live up to. Talent means, to some, you own it, and if you own something, it would be a natural thing to assume the sharing of it. I can feel like talent is similar to anything else, continuing development. A practicing. To practice IS to share. Maybe to me.
Oh well, I realising, that my own internal world, universe, multiverse is way better, than real world, because I can make utopia, than modern world, that I living in and makes me indifferent, because our planet are unbalanced, full of injustice, and somewhat crazy, because of majority people, unless, then traveling to different countries, and can make for me so magical and you can escape from harsh reality
I have almost never been bored in my life and yes my language is not limited to current jargon.I ca relate to just about every point and would include despite the "self absorbed" is contridicted N.Y. your outstanding and acute observation which iz happening all the time .of coure you will come accross as disconnected of course you are not you are so multileveledly connected simutaneously it is out of most others realm of conciousess they cant relate to it as they dont and never have bee there.All those observations testify to their lack of cognition. Glad you have a great deal ofcourage as well.Enjoy and resoate and identify with just about 100% would love ti know your thoughts on creativity inventiveness and imagination. Thanks again for all ontent.
I'm often told that I look arrogant because apparently I have a RBF. But when people meet me, they say that I'm actually nice.
I also have a weird sense of humour tbh. I've been somehow told that I'm selfish. I'm known to be considerate. I rarely interact with people, even family members. During family gatherings, I tend to keep to myself. I've been told that I'm smart even though I don't feel as such
@Isa It's easier said than done though 😂😂😂
Yup:
You’re in your head. You’re quiet/shy/introverted 🤮 You’re smart. You’re funny. You’re mysterious. You need to stop dwelling on/obsessing over ____ (item I’ve overthinking). You’re too nice. You look busy (nice way to say stressed/preoccupied).
I am definitely easily bored. If it’s not very cerebral, no thanks. I have better things to discuss than to shoot the breeze about the weather etc. I don’t care for superficial/small talk. Definitely have a more pretentious vocabulary and interests. In some ways yeah could be seen as less accessible and self-absorbed. Definitely loyal once my loyalty is gained.
Lol I have no idea of my style but I’m definitely a bit different from the others in a crowd, not dressed the same at all.
Naive...well sometimes I do take things a bit more literally than they’re meant 😊 and disconnected...it depends. I avoid the news any more as it’s almost all bad, so sometimes I won’t know anything unless I see it via social media
Why did I find myself on the internet...
omg everyone always thinks im flirting with them especially men and then i have to retreat because i was only trying to be friendly and fun.
Me too brother. I always tell ppl nothing personal, but i need lone time....that's common with lone wolves..when someone is park next to me i can't focus on what I need, im like a magnet so therefore I find another parking space
I'm told I'm not judgemental but in reality I am, I just hide it well ☺️
Very much enjoyed this, as a fellow-INFJ. Thank you!
I find so interesting to watch your videos because your body language is the same as mine and this is a little eerie yet I think we would be really good friends
Things i was told: "i was scared of you before i got to know you", "why are you not initiating phone calls or meetings?", "Why are you sitting so far, get closer".
Thank you very much for this comprehensive list,I relate to all of your points,I was trying to figure out your slight accent,thought you sound maybe a bit Irish,thank you for the clue in the video☺️ also I most struggle with the last point,I’m always that random girl for the situation and don’t really fit in most of the time,give people impression that I’m way too naive,I can’t take anymore their irrational reactions and try to avoid meeting ‘strangers’,I realize I can only safely socialize in private where I’m introduced to people by someone who already knows them,when I have to personally assert myself to a complete stranger and and have that initial small talk their lack of boundaries and sexualizing my ‘INFJ stare’ is just disastrous...i have women of my mothers age coming on to me sexually and telling me they are bisexual 5minutes into conversation...yep that’s how they ‘figured’ me out...😖
Wow... so relatable!
wegotonelove oh THANK YOU!my social curse now feels lifted and I get a glimpse of that much needed light of the truth.
@@lilydarling4215 ahahahah thats what this comment did for me.. Now I realise I'm not the only one who gets told not to stare and gives people the wrong impression. Especially that I'm in love with them... XD
I'm not lacking in practical applications IE; I'm pretty good at fixing things, but my
approach is often intuitive...It is as of i'm applying the same approach to things as
I do to people, with a pretty good success rate.
I like and appreciate manuals, but rarely read them through. (Same with most books)
I sometimes have a blind side with toxic and/or manipulative people. "Cool Hand Luke"
comes to mind...I'll often allow things to go too far at my detriment. (Could well be a
symptom of unresolved childhood abuse rather than MBTI related).
My patterns can often change drastically and for no obvious reason.
I am both sentimental and avant garde. Traditional and alien. Predictable and totally
from "left field". "Embrace the paradox" is something I say, (and do), quite a bit.
Most of my personal projects are left to some degree of incompletion.
"Waiting for developments" or "lateral drift"is my interpretation of what others often
see as indecision. It is often a matter of being Ying and waiting for the Yang to
push, pull or just present an alternative.
I've had many experiences that others would consider other worldly, magical, or
just plain strange and unbelievable.
I suck at meditation and used to envy those that didn't. Now I see that similar
results are obtainable if actions are approached thoughtfully.
Most of the time, my intentions and actions are misunderstood, even by those that
claim to know me well.
This thing about INFJ's needing to plan doesn't quite fit with me. I like being prepared
for the unexpected, but also enjoy impromptu and totally spontaneous actions.
I often have considered sexual activity to be a form of a healing art.
This could go on but I'll stop here..
It was a very interesting video.
All the traits very much resonate with INFJs. You explained the philosophical part of every trait so well. Thank you very much for sharing your thoughts Ren.
It's so good to see subscribers to your channel have been increasing and will be looking forward to see it touch 10k mark and more.
Thanks Vinatha! Yes, subs have been on the increase lately... I hope it continues, haha!
INFJ here, I can relate to ALL of these.
I think literally every single thing mentioned on this list I relate to
Putting Together Exactly & OverThink
Haha I loved the way you said "resting bitch face" 7:38
While listening to the intro: let me think, I'm told to be smart, I bet you too.
Literally the first on your list: smart. That coincidence made me laugh out loud.
It's a compliment but it also adds unwanted pressure as I often end up worrying about the expectations people have towards me. It's the same with every other compliment, actually.
I'm also told to be lazy but that comes from "being detached" and "worrying too much (= making up excuses)", plus the "not caring about things that aren't deep or useful for my goal/purpose".
Point blank, you're amazing.
Thanks Briiiiit! :-*
A lot of what you said I can relate to, especially not knowing what is going on around the world, they asked me where do I live or better yet, which planet are you from. That part I always wonder about, the planet thing. for example, a doctor gives medication to make you sleep, I am up all night, or you drink coffee to wake you up, I sleep. so not only is my personality unique but my physiological makeup as well. now that I would consider weird
Looking up and away, with some eye contact peppered in: "What are you looking at?" LOL
Accurate, here’s the problem, being around an se dom (or fe) they pick up on all the signs and will straight up ask if you’re bored 😂
In my analysis all of those things you say are true but I have analyzed it about myself as well that people don't usually tell us these things we conclude these things from people's expressions and reactions. May be once in a very long while a person might say one of these things but it's most of the time me myself that concludes it out of people's speech.
Being an INFJ is one thing. Being an INFJ and a true Capricorn at the same time with Capricorn Sun, Cancer moon, Venus in Aquarius and Capricorn Ascendant Yah now that's another thing right there
“Wow, you’re overthinking this. You couldn’t know any details about this situation so you must be making it up and stressing yourself out for no reason.”
Turns out I was right about X, person then gaslights me and pretends I never predicted said outcome. And repeat.
Ur Funny Thank U For Sharing & Bringing This Out Naive Used To Be But There's Always Hope
What about eyecontact as an INFJ..?
Great video
All of them hit me.
Then naive (in relationships) part got me like WoW! Soulmate type of thing. Hasn't worked well for me at all.
I don't believe in soul mates however I don't think the belief in it would make one naive. Just like one who is religious shouldn't be conceived as naive no matter the contradictories one might have in said belief.
I agree :)
Mine Comes From A Fear Of Almost Simultaneously Getting Hit By 2 Buses Within A Foot Of My Life
Can relate to so many of these things. The most common things I am told is "you're very intense" and "you would make a lousy poker player - everything shows in your face."
Can't disagree with any of these.
Self absorbed though, not so sure.
Usually if we are lost in our heads it is about other people.
We can be seen as loners and that is because we just have a thing where we can dearly love our friends, but the barrier in our heads that we have to climb over to go out is so high, that we might not see them for a long time!
Hashtag over analyzing....lmao
Gotta think things down to the core.
I do need time to make decisions sometimes. I see through people's psychological state.
Topics need to be in-depth or ya...it's boring lol.
Lol resting BF I've been told my whole life...it's me thinking guuuys!!!
You definitely need odd humour to appreciate us lol.
Becoming a professional photographer gave way to me learning to not be "selfish" ya we are not selfish. Lol
Just in our own world's
Loyal for sure.
People think I'm flirting more then what I am. As a female. It has proven dangerous.
Always been called niave.
We are spirits living a human experience. Mkay!
Keep up the good work!
Love the channel so much!
Call me selfish... hahahaha
Cheers
im not. really that smart,i got into nutrition,eating healthy, the immune system,mental health etc.........and 1400 hours of study feel better about myself,3years ago i think i was kind of ignorant about life i do want to learn things now, almost like im starting to grow up after all im only 68 thank you for the video
Everybody is not like you… No one thinks like you… You are the exception to the rule… You’re coldhearted… You’re weird… You’re passionate.. You hate stupid people, not everyone can be like you…
I can assemble things and be in situations like you described without much difficulty but driving was hard for me it took me two tries to get my driver's license but I was able to get my class b CDL to drive a school bus in one shot...
But I have a problem at times with common sense and I used to get frustrated about it now I just laughed it off and those who love me know that it just comes with the package LOL!
Why are you always smiling
That's The Way I Feel & Ppl Don't Really Care Absolutely U Too🤗
I’ve been told many of these. I’ve been called naive but also manipulative! I think that was missed on the list. Ive been called manipulative many times. I think because I don’t really know myself who I am so I become who I feel I need to be. How can one be naive and manipulative though? They’re kind of contradictory…. Also my husband tells me I live in my own world all the time, especially when we argue haha. I reluctantly agree.
Most of them are pisces characteristics. Like being in your dreamy world, being very very sensitive, have 2 sides bad and good, feminine energy etc.
Interesting, I did not know this :)