Hi Tamara, l just want to say that you have helped me personally so much just by validating my feelings in these situations. Your compassion and empathy is so geniune and the way you talk about these topics is so soothing. Thank you for sharing your knowledge with us out here. I also wanted to say, as someone who joined a religious cult when I was 19 and left 8 years later, this topic is so needed. I personally found solice years later in my fathers Catholic faith which I found actually incredibly healing and soothing of my trauma. The opposite of cold, distant and uncaring. I found ancient knowledge and tradtions since Jesus' times to be stabilizing and the community very welcoming and accepting. But I also could understand why many years ago there were issues of abuse. Its such a huge church community. But l have found since going to other churches before its the same in any church. There are abusive people hiding behind religion. I think the Catholic church gets stereotyped for this when its more an issue of number of members. Even in smaller churches you must be aware that there are peoole who may not be who they seem. One Father put it this way. Its not about the people but about the faith. So we should not be members for the people but the faith. This way of thinking has stopped me from being turned off religion whenever I hear a story of problematic preachers, pastors or religious leaders. I'm involved for the right reasons now not because I'm lonely and looking for new friends (though you can also meet great people in churches). I hope more people aren't turned off from faith because of these narcissists in every community. But instead just learn to be more aware not to let your guard down completely just because someone talks about God or spirituality. But still be as vigilant in keeping healthy boundaries with all people especially strangers you meet and especially if you have children.
This is such a wonderful comment of wisdom and it sums exactly the point I am getting at in this chat. 🤗💖 I am boosting your comment to the top of the comments because you have provided a gracious summarization of the true spirit of this issue. And thank you so much for your kind comments. I am truly glad this channel has been apart of your journey and has positively impacted you. That certainly is my prayer for you all here answered.
Through superiority they feel that they have control over you . There is a lot of challenges and competition among the members! Anticipating new titles within the church! This mindset is molded by leadership!
Thank you for allowing me to know and identify spiritual and religious trauma! This type of behavior is a collective narcissistic group who dictate the rules of the church! It does create an illusion for monetary gain! A lot of favoritism exists there!
Religious, spiritual, and political are all interwoven inside the religious institutions! They do make you feel shame , guilt, and rejection! Collective narcissism!
Yes. When collective narcissism, guilt, and rejection are occurring in a religious community enviornment, you know right then and there that something is right and the environment is not of God or true love for other people.
My experiences in the several churches I've been to were very questionable. I don't subscribe to any religion as my last experience featured the pastor telling me that evil was coming for me after questioning the serman. Instead of praying for my understanding he forecasted evil upon me. That was the last straw for me. God is very real to me but most people in churches, in my experience, are religiously shaming and individually highlighting; also gossipy and capitalistic. I'm sure there are some good churches but I haven't experienced them.
Such an important topic! I have been in a cult. I have also been in a toxic church-the cold staring, no place for you, talking about you behind your back. I felt like a quitter for leaving but you helped me see I did the right thing. I am grateful I found a loving church to go to instead
That's wonderful! I'm so glad. And I'm sure you did the right thing for your mental health and spiritual walk. You can't grow, find peace of mind, and feel the freedom in your spiritual walk that you should when you feel deceived, hurt, or manipulated.
Thank you for bringing awareness to this. Knowing is half the battle. A lot of people are suffering in silence. I've experienced this personally. Turned me off from religion as a whole. I still believe Jesus Christ and spreading his teachings. I just stay clear of any organized religion. We are all sinners. The only real Christian died on The Cross. We all fall short, but that doesn't disqualify us from God's grace. I just try to be a better person than I was yesterday
I left an emotionally admisible marriage where we were heavily involved in a mega church that I now define as a high control group. Looking back, covert narcissist are rampant within that church community. Fear was the driving force but narcissistic supply was found in the leadership as they got supply from serving but were shaming and controlling people
I’ve been dealing with this for a long time and just observed the repeated violent trends and they do think the same so they seem gangish and obsessed with toxic families
Hi Ms Tamara Thank you for this video. I don't even want to find a church anymore because of the longtime meddling of a professing Christian - or more -in my life, who behave as if they believe THEY are God in my life. I have come to the realization that I am not meant to be part of a church - at least at the moment. Judging another's heart is out of my authority to do accurately, but I don't believe God smiles on those who try to take His place.
Hey Tamara...havent been around for a while...had a rough time lately..CPTSD.... BUT! Connection to God has been burnt out of me...' Identity much?' Seems to me my Attachment style is part of it. I just cant come to terms with a neglected childhood and Trauma being ' Biblically' character development through ' trial '. A child doesnt know that.. confused.
I'm a JW. And it's true jws aren't perfect. And honestly if I didn't have a personal relationship with Jehovah himself I would not have allowed myself to continue to live because after learning how people are in the world or in religion people will hurt you. I have been through narc that's why I been watching you. I just don't comment much because I know Im being traced. But their has been improvements do to Jehovahs organization. Men can wear beards and women can wear pants. We as jw,s don't suppose to force our beliefs on anyone. We just are commanded to preach to people and it's their decision rather they believe it or not. But we don't suppose to force anything on anyone. I have been abused by an ex JW so trust me serving Jehovah is a personal thing. I experienced the worst in and out of religion so it became a personal thing with me and Jehovah that I am apart of anything! And I still love my enemies but I just keep my distance from anyone who traumatized me. I just don't carry hate in my heart. But right is right and wrong is wrong no matter who you are. I noticed people make mistakes in all religions and have their own views but Jw's are taught to live by what the Bible says to the best of their ability! And we are learning trust me the worse this world gets!
Thank you for your expert content and conversations. It has been very helpful for understanding toxic narc systems and cultish patterns in the workplace. I truly appreciate your in depth expertise and willingness to share. Thank you!
Tamara, some years ago my MIL made up a story about her son and me were having serious marital problems in front of her entire church. She then had that information put on the Internet and I found it. She was confronted about it and denied she did anything wrong. She did this Internet misinformation numerous times. I lost jobs due to what she did!!😣
Hi Tamara, l just want to say that you have helped me personally so much just by validating my feelings in these situations. Your compassion and empathy is so geniune and the way you talk about these topics is so soothing. Thank you for sharing your knowledge with us out here. I also wanted to say, as someone who joined a religious cult when I was 19 and left 8 years later, this topic is so needed. I personally found solice years later in my fathers Catholic faith which I found actually incredibly healing and soothing of my trauma. The opposite of cold, distant and uncaring. I found ancient knowledge and tradtions since Jesus' times to be stabilizing and the community very welcoming and accepting. But I also could understand why many years ago there were issues of abuse. Its such a huge church community. But l have found since going to other churches before its the same in any church. There are abusive people hiding behind religion. I think the Catholic church gets stereotyped for this when its more an issue of number of members. Even in smaller churches you must be aware that there are peoole who may not be who they seem. One Father put it this way. Its not about the people but about the faith. So we should not be members for the people but the faith. This way of thinking has stopped me from being turned off religion whenever I hear a story of problematic preachers, pastors or religious leaders. I'm involved for the right reasons now not because I'm lonely and looking for new friends (though you can also meet great people in churches). I hope more people aren't turned off from faith because of these narcissists in every community. But instead just learn to be more aware not to let your guard down completely just because someone talks about God or spirituality. But still be as vigilant in keeping healthy boundaries with all people especially strangers you meet and especially if you have children.
This is such a wonderful comment of wisdom and it sums exactly the point I am getting at in this chat. 🤗💖 I am boosting your comment to the top of the comments because you have provided a gracious summarization of the true spirit of this issue.
And thank you so much for your kind comments. I am truly glad this channel has been apart of your journey and has positively impacted you. That certainly is my prayer for you all here answered.
Interesting : collective narcissistic !! Wow! Superiority, traumatic bonding and psychological damage down through the years! Incredibly informative!
Through superiority they feel that they have control over you . There is a lot of challenges and competition among the members! Anticipating new titles within the church! This mindset is molded by leadership!
Thank you for allowing me to know and identify spiritual and religious trauma! This type of behavior is a collective narcissistic group who dictate the rules of the church! It does create an illusion for monetary gain! A lot of favoritism exists there!
Yes, you're welcome 😊 And well said. Very much agree.
Religious, spiritual, and political are all interwoven inside the religious institutions! They do make you feel shame , guilt, and rejection! Collective narcissism!
Yes. When collective narcissism, guilt, and rejection are occurring in a religious community enviornment, you know right then and there that something is right and the environment is not of God or true love for other people.
Thank you lovely for tackling this!! I appreciate your spiritual knowledge.
💖🙏 thank you! I'm so glad this was helpful.
Tamara, your message hits home. Thank you.
You're welcome 😊
Collective Narcism, and Coalition comments. Really hits target.
My experiences in the several churches I've been to were very questionable. I don't subscribe to any religion as my last experience featured the pastor telling me that evil was coming for me after questioning the serman. Instead of praying for my understanding he forecasted evil upon me. That was the last straw for me. God is very real to me but most people in churches, in my experience, are religiously shaming and individually highlighting; also gossipy and capitalistic. I'm sure there are some good churches but I haven't experienced them.
Sorry I missed tonight, I was spending time with my daughter 🙏🌴🌊
Looking forward to this!
Hope you enjoy a lovely Sunday 💐🫶💐
No need to apologize!
That's wonderful!! I love time with my momma so I get it. Hope you are well!
Such an important topic! I have been in a cult. I have also been in a toxic church-the cold staring, no place for you, talking about you behind your back. I felt like a quitter for leaving but you helped me see I did the right thing. I am grateful I found a loving church to go to instead
That's wonderful! I'm so glad. And I'm sure you did the right thing for your mental health and spiritual walk. You can't grow, find peace of mind, and feel the freedom in your spiritual walk that you should when you feel deceived, hurt, or manipulated.
Thank you for bringing awareness to this. Knowing is half the battle. A lot of people are suffering in silence. I've experienced this personally. Turned me off from religion as a whole. I still believe Jesus Christ and spreading his teachings. I just stay clear of any organized religion. We are all sinners. The only real Christian died on The Cross. We all fall short, but that doesn't disqualify us from God's grace. I just try to be a better person than I was yesterday
Be the change you want to see in the World.
So well said!! Amen and Amen 🙏
You're welcome and thank you!! Couldn't have said it better.
What should never happen; a senior in leadership being in constant contact with you, literally calling and texting all day every day.
I left an emotionally admisible marriage where we were heavily involved in a mega church that I now define as a high control group. Looking back, covert narcissist are rampant within that church community. Fear was the driving force but narcissistic supply was found in the leadership as they got supply from serving but were shaming and controlling people
Thank you
You're welcome!
I’ve been dealing with this for a long time and just observed the repeated violent trends and they do think the same so they seem gangish and obsessed with toxic families
Hi Ms Tamara
Thank you for this video. I don't even want to find a church anymore because of the longtime meddling of a professing Christian - or more -in my life, who behave as if they believe THEY are God in my life. I have come to the realization that I am not meant to be part of a church - at least at the moment. Judging another's heart is out of my authority to do accurately, but I don't believe God smiles on those who try to take His place.
That's very well said. I fully agree.
Good observations I didn’t know that slang 304 I heard 51/50
Hey Tamara...havent been around for a while...had a rough time lately..CPTSD.... BUT! Connection to God has been burnt out of me...' Identity much?' Seems to me my Attachment style is part of it. I just cant come to terms with a neglected childhood and Trauma being ' Biblically' character development through ' trial '. A child doesnt know that.. confused.
I'm a JW. And it's true jws aren't perfect. And honestly if I didn't have a personal relationship with Jehovah himself I would not have allowed myself to continue to live because after learning how people are in the world or in religion people will hurt you. I have been through narc that's why I been watching you. I just don't comment much because I know Im being traced. But their has been improvements do to Jehovahs organization. Men can wear beards and women can wear pants. We as jw,s don't suppose to force our beliefs on anyone. We just are commanded to preach to people and it's their decision rather they believe it or not. But we don't suppose to force anything on anyone. I have been abused by an ex JW so trust me serving Jehovah is a personal thing. I experienced the worst in and out of religion so it became a personal thing with me and Jehovah that I am apart of anything! And I still love my enemies but I just keep my distance from anyone who traumatized me. I just don't carry hate in my heart. But right is right and wrong is wrong no matter who you are. I noticed people make mistakes in all religions and have their own views but Jw's are taught to live by what the Bible says to the best of their ability! And we are learning trust me the worse this world gets!
Toxic positivity! That’s it
I love my late grandma. She was everything to us but...that toxic positivity is SOMETHING! 🙈
Hello
Hi there! 👋
Thank you for your expert content and conversations. It has been very helpful for understanding toxic narc systems and cultish patterns in the workplace. I truly appreciate your in depth expertise and willingness to share. Thank you!
@@carlalee1705 You're welcome!! And thank you for this kind comment. :) I'm so glad these discussions are helpful.
If they don’t let you be an individual that’s kind of weird
Tamara, some years ago my MIL made up a story about her son and me were having serious marital problems in front of her entire church. She then had that information put on the Internet and I found it. She was confronted about it and denied she did anything wrong. She did this Internet misinformation numerous times. I lost jobs due to what she did!!😣
That is awful! I'm sorry. :(
@@TherapistTamaraHill Thank you for everything. She's the most impossible and scary person I know...👹