How to make Norwegian Black Metal

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 20 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 2.3K

  • @bams4449
    @bams4449 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1518

    You mean how do these wanna be satanic bands try to look and sound evil? Simple..profanity.curse Jesus.religion.God.violence and animal torture.these are lame acts that just there to scare people..to just look badass..evil and tough..cus here to be metal..u need to pretend youre evil and duh..worship Satan?!.its all just image..just to sell..U need to be evil looking so your records wud sell 4 that macho tough evil sounding..hey look were Satanists..were badass and violent..and u wud go like..Yeah thats metal! NO DUDE thats just plain shallow n lame..these groups are just here 4 the attention and fad cus everyone in Norway is doing it..so y dont we? If you really are "evil"youd not be an artist..yud be in prison..having killed someone or murdered a family for real..Now that is Evil!!!!

    • @Pagefire
      @Pagefire  5 ปีที่แล้ว +918

      This is the weirdest URL I've ever seen.

    • @manichburgundy
      @manichburgundy 5 ปีที่แล้ว +239

      I sincerely hope you are joking...

    • @dexterj5615
      @dexterj5615 5 ปีที่แล้ว +74

      You crazy Norwegians

    • @ghoul2164
      @ghoul2164 5 ปีที่แล้ว +106

      Depends. Some black metal is really evil and I support it.

    • @lostmedia-e6p
      @lostmedia-e6p 5 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      @@Pagefire It's the type of url you'd find on the Deep Web. You're not evil enough to know the Deep Web, are you?! YOU.RE NOTE VIL E NUFFFF

  • @ZekeNigma
    @ZekeNigma 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1507

    "I am your slave, daddy"
    You did it! You broke typical black metal lyrics down to their bare essentials!

    • @davidong3325
      @davidong3325 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      DON'T BE STUPID ITS THE ACTUAL LYRICS

    • @TheCorose
      @TheCorose 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      That's part of a reggaeton song hehehe

    • @microsoftpain
      @microsoftpain 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      this comment has 666 likes now lmao

    • @woodenhoe
      @woodenhoe 4 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      Submissive Black Metal

    • @CureFruit1
      @CureFruit1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      thats a family values lyric.😂

  • @delirium636
    @delirium636 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3059

    The fact that the song was a actual good black metal song shows how correct he is

    • @arifmemovic3383
      @arifmemovic3383 5 ปีที่แล้ว +238

      I agree. This dude knows what hes talking about and is a seriously good metal musician.

    • @Not_me9791
      @Not_me9791 5 ปีที่แล้ว +50

      Well, good song... but he’s not right! I could do the same for heavy metal, pop music, rock...

    • @dwoh4345
      @dwoh4345 5 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      or he just said some bulshit and then made a good song the 2 unrelated(mostly)

    • @iamwamiam
      @iamwamiam 5 ปีที่แล้ว +57

      Except the song was nothing like he described earlier on in the vid lol. He just made a good song.

    • @Nemcija
      @Nemcija 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I love it! :D

  • @xyzcreate
    @xyzcreate 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3929

    *Norwegian Man tries to make fun of Norwegian Black Metal but accidentally records a masterpiece*
    There's no escaping it, it's in your blood!

    • @Reragi
      @Reragi 5 ปีที่แล้ว +228

      what blood? you mean in his absinthe?

    • @johncarter9399
      @johncarter9399 5 ปีที่แล้ว +93

      He needs to accept his destiny.

    • @Tonxonious
      @Tonxonious 5 ปีที่แล้ว +81

      Agreed, that track was killer

    • @samaragon2923
      @samaragon2923 5 ปีที่แล้ว +60

      TRUE KVLT

    • @Vintersemestre00
      @Vintersemestre00 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Everything he makes is really good. This guy is awesome.

  • @floridamancode_e2673
    @floridamancode_e2673 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1620

    So this is like the 3rd video of yours I've seen and so far the formula is
    Step 1) make fun of a genre
    Step 2) record a banger of a song in that genre
    Step 3) pretend like it was shit.
    And honestly im ok with this

  • @tojge
    @tojge 5 ปีที่แล้ว +933

    Alright, so, I have a friend who works as a DJ at a metal club, I've persuaded him to play the song from the end as a joke, everyone rocked out like mad, it was so funny to watch knowing the backstory :) thank you for that glorious moment Pagefire! A few people did ask later "what band was that?" but we were like, "they're TRVE KVLT, you're not supposed to know" :)

    • @Pagefire
      @Pagefire  5 ปีที่แล้ว +330

      Holy shit that's awesome.

    • @L0stInNeverland
      @L0stInNeverland 5 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      gde se to desilo?

    • @tojge
      @tojge 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      @@L0stInNeverland Problem Nightclub, mada se tada zvao Klub Pulse, Ruzveltova. Sorry što kasnim sa odgovorom, nije mi izašla notifikacija, slučajno sad videh pitanje...

    • @fallenknightofthelight3842
      @fallenknightofthelight3842 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@tojge? ⛧

    • @wind-upboy939
      @wind-upboy939 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      \m/ Awesome \m/

  • @willowsparks4576
    @willowsparks4576 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1749

    I absolutely died at 'Does your church look a bit cold?' XD

    • @koffieverslaafde627
      @koffieverslaafde627 5 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Willow Sparks lets make it warm shall we

    • @willowsparks4576
      @willowsparks4576 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      dogenator I hope Varg Vikcernes knows how to turn on a radiator

    • @photoboy2005
      @photoboy2005 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Willow Sparks I even answered. “Yes it does, we should warm it up”

    • @mararaisanen5696
      @mararaisanen5696 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I don't wanna ruin the number of likes. xD

    • @willowsparks4576
      @willowsparks4576 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      someone did :(

  • @QUK_DDCT
    @QUK_DDCT 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1344

    Satan will never answer your screams because the production quality is too good

    • @Sleepyhead101
      @Sleepyhead101 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      666 likes
      Never mind we are going to summon satan from this

    • @ryanwilliams1803
      @ryanwilliams1803 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      THere actually was at one time a period of well produced black metal in the 2000s and that stuff can be really fantastic

    • @Polyruidoso
      @Polyruidoso 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You mean symphonic Black Metal?

    • @ryanwilliams1803
      @ryanwilliams1803 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@Polyruidoso Yes in fact though you dont have to be symphonic to make well produced BM. Anyways, A great example is Siebenburgen and their album Delictum.. High production value and some amazing melodic riffs. the high production allows for powerful drums and very clear listening of the ornate guitar riffs. And another fantastic one is Sirius's Aeons of Magick

    • @connector_studios
      @connector_studios 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      that sounds like some bm lyrics

  • @TheCount-y7e
    @TheCount-y7e 5 ปีที่แล้ว +287

    "One time, a band called Mayhem"
    Ahhhh, here we go again

  • @adeadgirl13
    @adeadgirl13 5 ปีที่แล้ว +353

    I'm so Trve Kvlt that even I haven't heard my own songs.

    • @simen9155
      @simen9155 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I gave the 69th like. N I C E

    • @GraveyardShift-tl6ri
      @GraveyardShift-tl6ri 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      holy fuck dude these comments ARE SO GOOD

    • @Insanabiliter_In_Linea
      @Insanabiliter_In_Linea 19 วันที่ผ่านมา

      You have to be blackout drunk whenever you write songs so that not even _you_ know that you make music, otherwise you aren't Trvv Kvlt enovgh.

  • @lolallday08
    @lolallday08 5 ปีที่แล้ว +276

    "Does your local church seem a bit cold to you?"
    **chef's kiss**

  • @lucastickney7939
    @lucastickney7939 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1914

    I only listen to TRUE Norwegian black metal. Only five people know it. The band, and me.

    • @boxtube6533
      @boxtube6533 5 ปีที่แล้ว +194

      But are you part of the band? If not, then it’s not trve enough

    • @mantiqor
      @mantiqor 5 ปีที่แล้ว +125

      @@boxtube6533 Maybe he`s the one who owns the basement they practice and record in... Still not trve enovgh

    • @boxtube6533
      @boxtube6533 5 ปีที่แล้ว +76

      mantiqor I think yov mean the cave. Perhaps he’s the hostage the band is keeping for their next sacrifice to Satan?

    • @almarc
      @almarc 5 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      @@boxtube6533 He's the goat.

    • @hieronymusnervig8712
      @hieronymusnervig8712 5 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      That's one too much, someone must... go. If you know what I mean.

  • @blackheavyblans
    @blackheavyblans 5 ปีที่แล้ว +694

    The best moment of black metal:
    Interviewer: What is the primary ideology of primary ideas that fuel Gorgoroth's music?
    *silence moment*
    Gaahl: satan.

    • @virra98
      @virra98 5 ปีที่แล้ว +106

      *sips wine out of gothic vampire cup*

    • @Slothhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
      @Slothhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      *sips wine

    • @needfoolthings
      @needfoolthings 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      He even pronounced the s uncapitalzed.

    • @blitzenwisnia1938
      @blitzenwisnia1938 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Then he went on to marry a guy

    • @BababooeyGooey
      @BababooeyGooey 4 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Gaahl is actually a wholesome and chill dude. One of the few "deep" black metal dudes to not be a total freak.

  • @RobinTurner
    @RobinTurner 5 ปีที่แล้ว +395

    Be careful with the thesaurus - use it too much and you end up with symphonic metal lyrics.

    • @Pagefire
      @Pagefire  5 ปีที่แล้ว +98

      Good point.

    • @bt3743
      @bt3743 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@thegrindcoreenthusiast7293 OP just said symphonic metal. Calm your tits

    • @ZacharyTheJackal
      @ZacharyTheJackal 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@thegrindcoreenthusiast7293 Yeah dude calm down. There is no reason to react that way.

    • @thegrindcoreenthusiast7293
      @thegrindcoreenthusiast7293 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@ZacharyTheJackal, Oh. Sorry. Did Not See That Before.

    • @thegrindcoreenthusiast7293
      @thegrindcoreenthusiast7293 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@bt3743, Nevermind Then.

  • @NinjaContravaniaManX
    @NinjaContravaniaManX 5 ปีที่แล้ว +186

    I will record the most brvtal BM the world has ever heard. It will feature:
    - my mom's sewing machine for drums
    - a chainsaw and an old volvo engine for guitar sounds
    - the flatulence of an elephant for bass
    - the screams of on 8-year old kid who can't log on to fortnite
    - a 90's phone answering machine to record it all
    - and last but not least, the most evil thing: for the mixing process, I will use a modern computer with realtek oboard soundchip... AnD wINdOWs 10 dRIvErs!!!
    BM will never be the same, posers.

    • @LazarusvandeHel
      @LazarusvandeHel 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Hahaha do it!

    • @cams.2083
      @cams.2083 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Fvcking brvtal

    • @GraveyardShift-tl6ri
      @GraveyardShift-tl6ri 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      THIS COMMENT IS SO FUCKING GOOD IM SOBBING

    • @mysticmagicsmurfdarklord6844
      @mysticmagicsmurfdarklord6844 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Did you end up doing it?

    • @NinjaContravaniaManX
      @NinjaContravaniaManX 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@mysticmagicsmurfdarklord6844 Yes, but if more than 2 guys know it, it's not trv cvlt anymore. So you can't hear it, unfortunately.

  • @blakecurtis7809
    @blakecurtis7809 5 ปีที่แล้ว +111

    One time a band called MAYHEM was staying at a cabin and they all hated each other.
    Yeah that's basically every band.

  • @fartvader84yearsago8
    @fartvader84yearsago8 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1115

    Imagine if Norway didn't have forest. Black metal would have never existed

    • @YPO6
      @YPO6 5 ปีที่แล้ว +98

      Fjord metal.

    • @IronMan-uf6gj
      @IronMan-uf6gj 5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      As america never had a river and desert blues wouldn't exist 😂

    • @oseanian3834
      @oseanian3834 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Black metal have existed before Norwegian scene. Like Venom

    • @kiritobi
      @kiritobi 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Icelanders do'nt have problems with that

    • @joetrosclair8434
      @joetrosclair8434 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Now imagine if Tony Iommi hadn’t accidentally cut off his fingertips before quitting his job to do Black Sabbath full time 😉

  • @dr.gojira2240
    @dr.gojira2240 5 ปีที่แล้ว +933

    God this channel is underrated.

    • @aeolus4105
      @aeolus4105 5 ปีที่แล้ว +51

      No, it's just trve kvlt

    • @florianstumpf4349
      @florianstumpf4349 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      You're both right. 😉

    • @putridabomination
      @putridabomination 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ist krieg

    • @maniacs4metalgore256
      @maniacs4metalgore256 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Just the music composition is a 10.

    • @f10ki
      @f10ki 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Who wants to see a fat metalhead talking trash about everything?

  • @coltermerriman5911
    @coltermerriman5911 5 ปีที่แล้ว +796

    Hey, all jokes aside, this guy knocked out a banger at the end there.

    • @sandraiga4729
      @sandraiga4729 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Why am I enjoying this 😂

    • @spelaoxy
      @spelaoxy 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I like it too :)

    • @moredycoo1188
      @moredycoo1188 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      The song was actually good

    • @cobraglatiator
      @cobraglatiator 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      made it 666 satan achieved.

    • @collt091
      @collt091 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I know right

  • @lobsterhelmet348
    @lobsterhelmet348 5 ปีที่แล้ว +69

    I've been playing black metal for roughly 15 years. And I have to say, all of this is true. More than once I've recorded a demo straight into a tape recorder and dumped it onto even cheaper cassettes. It's dumb, cheesy, and sound like canned ass, but I still love it.

    • @mgradiant
      @mgradiant 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Wow! A Black Metal artist self-aware of their own memeness. You, sir/ma’am/whichever gender you prefer, have my respect!

    • @etfluezu9161
      @etfluezu9161 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      people these days unironically listen to asmr why feeling bad for having a soft spot in your heart for black metal? :)

  • @PaulTheSkeptic
    @PaulTheSkeptic 5 ปีที่แล้ว +105

    Hm. Okay. "Barney is my dark lord, when I sing about him my throat gets sore. When I play D&D, I play as Barney the dinosaur...." Hey you're right. This is easy.

  • @Casketkrusher_
    @Casketkrusher_ 5 ปีที่แล้ว +153

    "No, no, no! Don't play those church chords, have you forgotten who our enemies are?" I literally peed myself this is beyond genius 😂

    • @user-dj6lj1dl1c
      @user-dj6lj1dl1c 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Doom Guy excuse me

    • @AndresLopez-bz7bs
      @AndresLopez-bz7bs 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      It wasnt that funny, americans sense of humor is kind of stupid

    • @musthofaramadhani9962
      @musthofaramadhani9962 ปีที่แล้ว

      So it means doom metal bands have forgotten their enemies 😂

  • @Controverze
    @Controverze 5 ปีที่แล้ว +63

    "I think i accidentally wrote an Immortal song..."
    GG, you got a chuckle out of me

  • @tomasochoa
    @tomasochoa 5 ปีที่แล้ว +759

    You didn't paint your face for the video
    0/10 basically unlistenable

    • @MrSFblack
      @MrSFblack 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      And the production didn't sound crappy enough

    • @shesh_o
      @shesh_o 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Remember he didn't got the make up, his friend had no money, and also him, of course.

    • @sicroyalty
      @sicroyalty 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Sounded like a good song, not KVLT enuff

    • @brostenen
      @brostenen 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      That makes him even more black metal. Becauuuuse.... Corps paint is mainstream within the BlacMetal community. Ahhh... Get it. 😉

    • @ScreamingSkullSaloon
      @ScreamingSkullSaloon 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      His roommate and him did not have any more money for face paint and if they did they would have to have driven all the way to Oslo to get some.

  • @huolong437
    @huolong437 4 ปีที่แล้ว +60

    The guy who made the captions in Spanish is really a genius. They even changed the spelling of Cangrejo (crab) to Kangrejo (krabbe satan)

  • @kylevanzyl6452
    @kylevanzyl6452 5 ปีที่แล้ว +504

    Actually it's only Black Metal if it's made in the Kvlt region of France. Otherwise it's just Sparkling Death Metal

    • @timothymuscat1728
      @timothymuscat1728 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Underrated comment

    • @thodorisk9031
      @thodorisk9031 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Best comment ive seen all day

    • @rippedtorn2310
      @rippedtorn2310 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Stop being genuinely amusing on You-Tube .

    • @xtexaschainsawx
      @xtexaschainsawx 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      True.

    • @southofheck
      @southofheck 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Sparkling Death Metal is a series of words i never thought id read but im gonna be using for the rest of my life now. God- er... Satan bless you(?)

  • @SaulGoodman-jo2hb
    @SaulGoodman-jo2hb 5 ปีที่แล้ว +525

    You forgot to pick an ideology! Mix elements from satanism, nihilism, fascism and lord of the rings

    • @hartwinstein7434
      @hartwinstein7434 5 ปีที่แล้ว +105

      you forgot Paganism and Depression

    • @Nantosuelta
      @Nantosuelta 5 ปีที่แล้ว +70

      March of the unholy heathen nazgul gestapo
      Satanic pagan third reich uruk hai
      Onslaught of hells nazi ring wraiths
      Futility of mordor's blackened chalice
      theres your black metal ep right there

    • @indigohalf
      @indigohalf 5 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      Hey now, Red Anarchist Black Metal is an option too.

    • @zephyrna6249
      @zephyrna6249 5 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      @@indigohalf *gets stabbed in the head and back 15 times*

    • @einzelfeuer_2855
      @einzelfeuer_2855 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@zephyrna6249 *also deserves it for being a freak and making threats against people*

  • @alwaysoozingsomething2290
    @alwaysoozingsomething2290 5 ปีที่แล้ว +375

    you say "sing about castles" like every song shouldn't be about castles

    • @Pagefire
      @Pagefire  5 ปีที่แล้ว +53

      You know, you got us there.

    • @BlaBla-pf8mf
      @BlaBla-pf8mf 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Is this an alt of Shadiversity?

    • @oopsyboops4806
      @oopsyboops4806 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@Pagefire can you do a how do be deathgrind video I'm waiting and hoping eventually this will happen in good time

    • @thebiglich
      @thebiglich 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@BlaBla-pf8mf imagine shadiversity making a video about the medieval realism of black metal lyric castles

  • @joebates7545
    @joebates7545 5 ปีที่แล้ว +193

    Hilarious without sounding condescending. You clearly understand Black Metal, but can still poke fun at it.
    Subscribed.

    • @t.a.8380
      @t.a.8380 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Joe Bates this entire video shows that he doesn’t understand it very well at all. Just picks all the stereotypes and exaggerates them. I didn’t find any of it funny I can’t even believe I got through the entire video.

    • @IronMan-uf6gj
      @IronMan-uf6gj 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Lol he understands shit about black metal, he is a cock head.

    • @markcreemore4915
      @markcreemore4915 5 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      All these humorless kvlt klovvns getting butthurt because he doesnt take every aspect of BM with profound seriousness.
      It's just a subgenre of music, relax kids.

    • @TheRealSaintNickNorthside
      @TheRealSaintNickNorthside 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@markcreemore4915 It's not, it's a way of life. Why the _fuck_ do you think I live in the North Pole nigga?

    • @TheRealSaintNickNorthside
      @TheRealSaintNickNorthside 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      But on the real I didn't laugh either, these guys are just run of the mill nerds that lack creativity, albeit they can minimally mimic other artists very well. That's what you get for having great intellectual abilities and no soul.

  • @Imnotsure0987
    @Imnotsure0987 5 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    This. This is why I LOVE Black Metal. I is so goofy and fun and glam and people take it so seriously and think you are so evil cause you wear a inverted cross. It is amazing Trve Kvlt.

  • @queerspirit2995
    @queerspirit2995 4 ปีที่แล้ว +192

    "Norwegian Black Metal is just Black Metal with branding," Finally, someone said it. It's also pretty nationalist.

    • @robintherainbow8020
      @robintherainbow8020 4 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      It ranges from relatively unproblematic to full on neonazis. There are some cool artists (Like Dypfryst, check them out, they're cool), But you also ofc have to be wary of nazis, and it's really annoying. Same with history reenacting groups and stuff like that. It's at the point where some viking fencing reenacting groups do a full on background check on you to be completely sure you're not some nazi edgelord. Pretty depressing shit

    • @robintherainbow8020
      @robintherainbow8020 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      @ Nationalism is fine as long as it isn't used to push people away, or discriminate. King Harald V here in Norway is great at this. Bringing everyone together under the identity of Norwegian, no matter your religion or skin tone.
      But too often, nationalism is used to discriminate of harass, which is why Nationalism usually sounds bad to a lot of people. It brings back some memories of Germany, or more recently, "nationalist" terror attacks seeking to cleanse the nation.

    • @Nattyplatinum
      @Nattyplatinum 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@robintherainbow8020 if you’re not from fucking Norway, and your fucking parents are not from Norway. Then you’re not fucking Norwegian.

    • @Hoodpartisan
      @Hoodpartisan 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@Nattyplatinum this

    • @alexanderplatypus3664
      @alexanderplatypus3664 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      It's just it adds to the mystique of the genre... gives it somewhat a rooted identity. The idea of like it being freezing cold, kind of a "frontier wasteland" of a nation, harsh natural elements, the fact christianity came sort of late and so there is a deeper pagan tradition still, links to viking past of glamorizing war and individuality, all that stuff
      Black metal exists globally at this point, in countries without really any christian religion dominating, where you'd think praising satan wouldn't even be appropriate. But it's the general sentiment involved. Basically black metal is like "goths but more aggressive and intense"

  • @alexmaragh7766
    @alexmaragh7766 5 ปีที่แล้ว +137

    needs to be watched at 144p for the music video

    • @tremapar
      @tremapar 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      OMG that's perfect
      Also, band recommendations for fans of Skumle Natt - Nattesverd? Their use of dingdingding is amazing

    • @thulsa_doom
      @thulsa_doom 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      I actually did it

  • @RepulsionAudio
    @RepulsionAudio 5 ปีที่แล้ว +467

    not kvlt enough, can actually hear what notes you're playing

  • @nabeelwork2747
    @nabeelwork2747 5 ปีที่แล้ว +260

    how to make black metal
    1.find washing machine
    2.throw brick in it and start it
    3.?????
    4.Profit

    • @joeboccuto6830
      @joeboccuto6830 5 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      If you profit from black metal you are not trve

    • @l-HEAVY-SNIPER-l
      @l-HEAVY-SNIPER-l 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Nabeel Work that makes no sense but ok lmao

    • @NorthernWind26
      @NorthernWind26 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      I agree

    • @britta-alrikobrien-nikkola9818
      @britta-alrikobrien-nikkola9818 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      ROFLMAO I just happen to have a washing machine on my back porch right now. I have it outside because my house is just that darn small, I live in tiny POS. To keep the lid of the washer closed there is a brick sitting on it.
      I already have my drummer picked out.
      Never mind the fact that I play drums myself, I can be lazy and the washer can be drummer.

  • @FLOURISHFAMILYENT
    @FLOURISHFAMILYENT 2 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    This channel is a hidden gem. I can not stress that enough. This how to content is to me better then alot of the more major channels

  • @EveEvangel
    @EveEvangel 5 ปีที่แล้ว +205

    having worked with some really TRVE people of the Central European scene in the early 90ies who were in reality virgins still living with their parents I found this to be very entertaining and accurate.

  • @ShuriBear
    @ShuriBear 5 ปีที่แล้ว +357

    I came from your Grindcore video and I am astonished how less subscribers you have with this kind of production value. I love the "how to" series. Keep it up!

    • @josephblanchard6248
      @josephblanchard6248 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same here. And also same here.

    • @josephblanchard6248
      @josephblanchard6248 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      This is the exact type of quality that you just expect to have atleast $1million subscribers when you go and see the amount as you're pushing the subscribe button yourself! So I just figured that this is just a pretty new channel, since you know, the quality content is already up there with the big boy channels of TH-cam.

    • @josephblanchard6248
      @josephblanchard6248 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      And also, this dude could just be a commenter on any genre, place or thing, and it would just be the most entertaining channel on here. Because I'd love to hear him talk about sports, music, movies, TV shows and just *anything* else in general tho man lol.

    • @alexanderplatypus3664
      @alexanderplatypus3664 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I don't want to say it, but it could be his appearance... overweight, glasses, facial hair. Also the accent. Usually "big" channels have some attractive looking person behind them...
      I agree with what you said though, this video series is AMAZING in terms of the technical sides of how to create music in these genres. And the fact he makes an actual song (or more) at the end is AWESOME as well. My only real complaint is sometimes he's overly critical and dismissive of some of the genres, there's a line between gentle mockery and actually being a dickhead towards it

  • @chimpinaneckbrace
    @chimpinaneckbrace 5 ปีที่แล้ว +102

    The Tommy Wiseau 'Dawn of the Black Hearts' album cover made me spit-laugh beer all over my laptop sceen. We do have fun here.

  • @mikesimpson3207
    @mikesimpson3207 4 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    "The goat is for later..."
    I have died.

  • @Kimberly-x2h
    @Kimberly-x2h 5 ปีที่แล้ว +271

    **happy viking noises**

    • @Floatfacedown7
      @Floatfacedown7 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Get the hell out of this genre look at your profile

    • @blacksaltscotland
      @blacksaltscotland 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@Floatfacedown7 he commented a memey comment on a memey video... calm your tits

    • @aweliano
      @aweliano 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Fucking weeb. Gross

    • @bananahat1814
      @bananahat1814 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Oh shut up, can’t we just enjoy anime and black metal? This kinda shit is why I can’t stand a lot of metal fans.

    • @blacksaltscotland
      @blacksaltscotland 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@bananahat1814 agreed. Even though I can't fucking stand anime and do joke around with weeb jokes, it's just jokes. Honestly I couldn't give a shit

  • @Lora_1113
    @Lora_1113 5 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    You put so much work and time into this video and I'm showing it to all my friends. You, sir, are a pride to our metal community.

  • @GabrielGAS1201
    @GabrielGAS1201 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1406

    "he's making watch mojo content...but more racist" LOL

    • @alanheyes694
      @alanheyes694 5 ปีที่แล้ว +70

      gabriel saboya He is a proud tribalist, in all fairness.

    • @Nantosuelta
      @Nantosuelta 5 ปีที่แล้ว +77

      Varg is the dude

    • @nemesisencounter2060
      @nemesisencounter2060 5 ปีที่แล้ว +75

      @@alanheyes694 he's an asshole

    • @KimchiYeo
      @KimchiYeo 5 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      acism is fun: it seperates the weaklings from the alpha's

    • @mistermystery1999
      @mistermystery1999 5 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      @@nemesisencounter2060 nah he's pretty cool

  • @endlesswanderer1753
    @endlesswanderer1753 5 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    This is going to sound stupid, but when I was an edgy teenager I would fall asleep to black metal. I was nodding off in the middle of your example song, so that's surely a sign of how damn good it is. I pavlov'd my damn circadian rhythm into being activated by blast beats and tremolo-picked chords. Well done sir.

  • @JunkyardGod
    @JunkyardGod 5 ปีที่แล้ว +223

    THE GOAT IS FOR LATER
    you gots a new sub 😁

  • @jomy10-games
    @jomy10-games 5 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    "Does your local church look a bit cold to you?"
    Omg, I'm dying.

  • @Redleg615
    @Redleg615 4 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    Vargs face popping up at the beginning caused me to laugh uncontrollably for ten minutes. So glad for this channel

  • @dracosol4415
    @dracosol4415 5 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    "Optionally film it in winter"
    You mean *mandatory*

  • @duncanmilne8691
    @duncanmilne8691 5 ปีที่แล้ว +180

    production too good. not kvlt enough.

    • @HughMansonMD
      @HughMansonMD 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I can understand lyrics, so not kvlt..

    • @duncanmilne8691
      @duncanmilne8691 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@HughMansonMD well.. its kind of easy when the lyrics are shown..

    • @HughMansonMD
      @HughMansonMD 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@duncanmilne8691 exactly, trve kvlt would still sound like a bunch of snarly, one syllable shrieks with pauses between them and then the lyrics would show up in Norse.

  • @newmzy0
    @newmzy0 5 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    As Homer Simpson once said: "it's funny because it's true".

  • @MrSFblack
    @MrSFblack 4 ปีที่แล้ว +446

    What's Varg doing these days?
    *Making WatchMojo content but more racist*

    • @SeatLeonMK2
      @SeatLeonMK2 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      how is that racist

    • @veneficus582
      @veneficus582 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      He's based and redpilled

    • @woffe8094
      @woffe8094 4 ปีที่แล้ว +54

      @@veneficus582 he's straight up racist

    • @veneficus582
      @veneficus582 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      @@woffe8094 He's not, but there's nothing wrong with that really

    • @ejl1000
      @ejl1000 4 ปีที่แล้ว +61

      @@veneficus582 Nothing wrong with being racist? Fucking what.

  • @sanataissick
    @sanataissick 5 ปีที่แล้ว +177

    What is this K-pop crap?! You were supposed to sell your soul to our lord and savour Dark Lord Behsåattanôs. Not to Nuclear Blast.

  • @arietz86
    @arietz86 5 ปีที่แล้ว +103

    One of the most accurate description of Norwegian black metal I ever seen!

    • @IronMan-uf6gj
      @IronMan-uf6gj 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      You know shit about black metal. I tell youabout blues as much as you know about black metal. Blues is playing guitar and singing about something said while you looking at river. That is it.

    • @williamyoungkin
      @williamyoungkin 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@IronMan-uf6gj its gonna be ok

  • @heatherlennox3695
    @heatherlennox3695 5 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Everything that's fun about Norwegian Black Metal wrapped up in one short film

  • @jhstatts888
    @jhstatts888 5 ปีที่แล้ว +107

    Your satirical song is just as good as any trve kvlt BM. Please make a record.

  • @Hosenlatzwilly
    @Hosenlatzwilly 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    "Add some Dingdingding"
    *Fenriz has left the Chat*

  • @bryans138
    @bryans138 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Please don't ever stop making these. I haven't laughed this hard in a while.

  • @dracula7919
    @dracula7919 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    I can’t believe how good the end result actually sounds like.. :O

  • @joniden2215
    @joniden2215 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    This and Goniloc are criminally underrated channels.
    You sir have a new subscriber.

  • @kassemir
    @kassemir 5 ปีที่แล้ว +65

    "Now press some casette tapes and some vinyls, and don't tell any one you exist" :D
    Brilliant!

  • @mileshill7196
    @mileshill7196 5 ปีที่แล้ว +70

    >all hail lord Sobek
    I see you’re a man of kvltvre as well.

    • @johannaderee4763
      @johannaderee4763 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      came here to say the exact same thing

    • @urm9.m
      @urm9.m 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      "...and once more we THREATEN TO AWAKEN HIS ANGER"

  • @PuresG1ft
    @PuresG1ft 5 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    Would listen to the full album on bandcamp.

  • @Volcodom
    @Volcodom 5 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    I came because I'm genuinely interested in black metal as a genre. I stayed because Varg and WM got burned. But I subscribed for lord Sobek. Also the track was genuinely pretty cool!

  • @DonP818
    @DonP818 5 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Why I hadn’t discovered this sooner truly upsets me. Also the songs end up pretty damn sick. Great work dude!

    • @kvadratbitter
      @kvadratbitter 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      DonP818 it was uploaded a month ago... easily upset?

  • @buttp0under420
    @buttp0under420 5 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    Can't wait for this channel to blow up

    • @einzelfeuer_2855
      @einzelfeuer_2855 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      *FBI is now monitoring your future comments based on keyword algorithms*

    • @MrYowen88
      @MrYowen88 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      naw keep it kvlt

  • @LeftyConspirator
    @LeftyConspirator 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Norway was a fucking ride in the nineties.

  • @abdulinsota5320
    @abdulinsota5320 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Fucking died when you said:Does your local church look too cold to you and vargs comes out

  • @mile0141
    @mile0141 5 ปีที่แล้ว +73

    pleaseeee do one on slam :•)

    • @DailyAaron
      @DailyAaron 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I second that thought!

  • @ArchangelSteve
    @ArchangelSteve 5 ปีที่แล้ว +74

    Subbed, Hail Sobek!

  • @oliverelpero
    @oliverelpero 5 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    you're absolutely right on everything and it pisses me off how predictable we are lmao

  • @filipeoni
    @filipeoni ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Show motion is not even slow motion, it's Just him walking slowly! THAT'S SO FVKING KVLT!!!!!!!

  • @TheBlackKnight1o1
    @TheBlackKnight1o1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    Varg: Hates God and Christianity
    Also Varg: Names his music after a place in a Christian author's book

    • @flatterswhite
      @flatterswhite 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      German guy: I hate hitler
      also German guy: is german

    • @flatterswhite
      @flatterswhite 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @MetalBrush I suppose Hitler and the rest of Austria nearly took over the world then

    • @astyrvela
      @astyrvela 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lotr has nothing to do with christianity. Idk about Tolkien but the book is mostly inspired by Norse mythology so...

    • @TheBlackKnight1o1
      @TheBlackKnight1o1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@astyrvela Tolkien was a major Christian, he famously converted C.S. Lewis.
      His books do contain Biblical themes and references, even if they are not overtly Christian allegories like Lewis's Chronicles of Narnia.
      It's just kinda funny to me.

    • @alexanderplatypus3664
      @alexanderplatypus3664 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      The thing about Satanism is it actually validates traditional religions a lot
      True "anti religion" is just straightforward atheism
      But yeah Burzum's output is partial "folk" not just entirely black metal, so it ties a lot into mythology, fiction and so on. That is true for other black metal work too sometimes.

  • @FRZNGLSRBM
    @FRZNGLSRBM 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I haven't laughed so hard in a while! And then song was actually pretty good imo. Great video!

  • @thehorriblebright
    @thehorriblebright 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    The Sobek background caught me totally off guard. I love when my youtube subs collide.

  • @ulfdanielsen6009
    @ulfdanielsen6009 5 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    Dødeman Den Onde.
    ( Evil Deadman )
    Best name ever.
    This is hilarious.
    Salutatem Infernum from Denmark.

  • @newtdevaychet
    @newtdevaychet 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    The middle finger to the very far away church murdered me 😂

  • @SamA-cw3be
    @SamA-cw3be 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I can’t believe you actually put the real history of Norwegian black metal. You actually kinda treated the genre with respect. Something I didn’t expect when I clicked on this video. Thank you

  • @cheyiokoaye2007
    @cheyiokoaye2007 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This is my new fav channel. Been thinking of getting into playing BM for a while and this just gave me a bunch of ideas

  • @namlessandshameless4461
    @namlessandshameless4461 5 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    *The goat is for later* 🤘🏻😂
    Edit: song is legit

  • @IronreaverVII
    @IronreaverVII 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I can't wait to see this channel blow up and get the viewcounts it deserves.

  • @Jaspertine
    @Jaspertine 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    "Does your local church look a bit cold to you?" LMAO!

  • @SomethingImpromptu
    @SomethingImpromptu 4 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    Your track came out really well at the end. I’m pretty picky with black metal, but I really like the first track or two on Dissected’s Storm of the Light’s Bain (cray to think it’s like 25 years old now). And I’d be lying if I said Mayhem, Emperor, Gorgoroth & others didn’t have some tracks I can get down with. Most of what I listen to these days is more melodic, even if it’s very distorted, but as far as black metal goes, outside of the bands that have literal operatic style melodic vocals (Dimmu Borgir? I don’t remember that many melodic black metal bands), I’d say they were relatively melodic. Also, the piano tracks Impromptu (Allegro Maestoso) by Japanese black metal band Sigh is absolutely beautiful. That was always a favorite- very unique.
    Also, I have to say: I appreciate that you brought up Varg’s xenophobic far-right bullshit. It’s acrually hilarious to me- *of course* the members of a subculture which literally want to embody EVIL get into that kind of politics- really speaks volumes. I’ve met plenty of punk kids who like the idea of anarchism & also like black metal aesthetics, but you don’t meet a lot of people on the left who literally aspire to be evil & worship Satan xD On the other hand, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Ayn Rand’s (and other extreme individualist social Darwinist types’) philosophy is literally the same as LeVeyan Satanism, or Thelema, or other dark occult (as opposed to light occult/esoteric) philosophies & religions, except without the “religious” iconography. It boils down to “Do whatever your ego wants you to do, regardless of the harm it causes others, and actually being absolutely ruthless, cruel, and sadistic towards others in pursuit of your own self-gain is 100% ethically justified so don’t feel bad about it.” This overlaps with a lot of other, slightly more watered down capitalist ideology, but at any rate... I don’t fux with it. If anybody is going to get into esoteric/occult/spiritual philosophy, go with the light shit. That’s where people are chill and actually have fun and look out for each other and don’t end up looking like a somehow even more racist old Charles Manson hermit. Haha.

    • @alexanderplatypus3664
      @alexanderplatypus3664 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Can't have light without dark
      It's just about acknowledging part of reality and instinct, etc
      It's an aesthetic experience and can be very meaningful, the intensity and passion in "dark" things are more profound. On a larger scale, it's kind of comparing metal to pop. It's more fun and less challenging to just bop your head to Beyonce or whatever, and feel good about things. But... is that really all life is? Or has to be

  • @daze9015
    @daze9015 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Don't forget: If your band has only 2 or 3 listeners, then you're doing a good job

    • @MrYowen88
      @MrYowen88 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      I only have one listener... people with 2-3 listeners are posers

    • @daze9015
      @daze9015 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@MrYowen88 You right. However, having no listeners at all is trve kvlt.

  • @indigohalf
    @indigohalf 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I sure was not expecting to see a Sobek joke on Metal TH-cam.

  • @reigninoel
    @reigninoel 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    "DØDEMANNEN ONDE"
    *dies lavghing*

  • @tatemcilwain1775
    @tatemcilwain1775 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    "That's one way to make a unicorn" that's fucking hilarious. Top notch joke I'm stealing it

  • @mphoanderson4605
    @mphoanderson4605 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    “Does your local church look a bit cold to you?” 💀

  • @djoverkin
    @djoverkin 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    the talking part of the song was so reminiscent of for all tid/stormblast

    • @Pagefire
      @Pagefire  5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Congratulations! You're the first to notice. I referenced that on purpose.

    • @djoverkin
      @djoverkin 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@Pagefire wow, I feel so TRVKVLT. 16 yr old me just became frostbitten. Also, I went back after watching your vid and listened to the whole Stormblast album. Thx for that, forgot what an amazing piece of musicianship it was. Your song is great too, sounds like the real deal if you ignore the lyrics

  • @DarknessBrothersPT
    @DarknessBrothersPT 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Wow, this is an actual masterpiece, I love how the music begins.

  • @ExplizitDuester
    @ExplizitDuester 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    How has this only this much views? This video format is gold, I came here from your grindcore video and if you keep this up your subscribtions hopefully go through the roof.

  • @zaca3256
    @zaca3256 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I unironically love your ironic song.

  • @be_the_xbox3786
    @be_the_xbox3786 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Ngl the frog doing vocals is fire

  • @karlteigen8496
    @karlteigen8496 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    "Plenty of unburned churches." Good one!

  • @andreabonomelli5263
    @andreabonomelli5263 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    “U” did not existed in the Latin alphabet and “V” was used instead

    • @Aireleria2078
      @Aireleria2078 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I thought it was because V is more... edgy

  • @mortenrev
    @mortenrev 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    "Why won't you answer my screams satan?
    I am your timeless dreadful lad!"
    Oh Satan, that was funny!

  • @daltonetzler5485
    @daltonetzler5485 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    When you hit him in the face with your wallet with the most accidental perfect shot. Lmao 5:05

  • @SarimFaruque
    @SarimFaruque 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Ca you do a power metal video?

  • @Eugensson
    @Eugensson 5 ปีที่แล้ว +69

    >student debt
    >norway
    who are you trying to fool? :)

  • @jamestown9883
    @jamestown9883 5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    Was that an all hail sobek background on your PC?!
    This is not the crossover I expected.

    • @apanapandottir205
      @apanapandottir205 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      HAIL SOBEK!

    • @vermincrown
      @vermincrown 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yeah, I just landed here randomly and a wild HBomberguy reference appears.

  • @mayravixx25
    @mayravixx25 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    How have I never found your channel until now? I genuinely had a hard time trying to stop laughing.

  • @TricksterModeEngaged
    @TricksterModeEngaged ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Pagefire out here being low-key the most versatile metal band on TH-cam