I was in one of those relationships. I have finally reached the stage of not wanting him back. I realize it would never work without therapy, I have done my work. I don’t think he has done any.
Im been on and off with a dismissive for 13 years she discarded me over 6 times. I asked her for respect and she twisted my words around as me trying to control her. I finally gave up on her been in no contact going on 5 weeks.
If you are having a hard time determining if you can forgive all of the hurt imposed by the DA (some horrible HORRIBLE accusations and comments and actions) and you can’t bring yourself to actually enjoy your time with them because they will never discuss anything… and I’m the “nag” for always wanting to rehash because nothing is ever actually fixed… Is it time to just go? I have been lonely for over 2 yrs if a 5 yr courtship… and I am afraid I can’t get over this as a true betrayal and the DA am does not do anything to fix it or work in it.
Was in a 3 year relationship and she pulled away multiple times and recently again. Haven’t talked to her in a few weeks. Starting to move on but I just know she will text me eventually.
The people reaching out are probably fearful avoidant, not DA. I think a lot of FAs mistype as DA, and most DAs would type as secure in the unusual circumstance that they took the test.
What does it mean if they never reaxh out? Except for a reply to a birthday wish you sent and in return wishing you on your bithday, both of which was within less than 10 months. Not a word extra. I know I shouldnt care but i need to hear this, whatver the answer, it will help me get clarity as there isnt any.
We were together for a year and it was the first time he actually made a commitment and got into a relationship. He told me prior to this he used to date only for a few months. He was keen to meet and used to initiate plans as and when he could. We met a week prior. Something ticked him off that day. And then out of the blue he said why don't you trust me (this was because of my past experience). Some of his actions used to trigger my past which made me ask him sometimes. But I didn't accuse him, I used to ask. It ended abruptly. We had a short conversation over text. I explained that im working on it. But he said he can't give it more time. Next day he checks in with me about how im doing and said that he cares about me. And dead silence after rhat until I wished. Saw a story or two on WA, as I didn't post often. But thats it. I'd appreciate if you could share your pov on the same. Haven't found any reason to comfort myself and move on from. The rejection feels too deep as he never came back even once.
I was with him only 4 weeks. In that time he was attentive, respectful always contacted me before and after a date. Great guy!! Then I had to tell him about a family member who is incarcerated ( he knew our circle of friends ) He let me know when I told him, I’m not upset or will hold that against you for not letting me know. That was Tuesday, I got call than on Saturday he called and said he really liked me a lot I’m a great person but actually looking for a clone of my deceased wife…… I say it’s bull and it had to do with my family member…. I honestly feel he has the right to leave the situation but should have been honest. I immediately said it’s okay and understand. He said I really would love to stay friends and I agreed yet thought about it and won’t. Reason being he hasn’t reached out to ask how am I feeling …… Question, I’ve stopped going to the bar we all hang out in , karaoke etc Should I stay away a couple of weeks then go to see our circle of friends ? Of course I will say hello I’m not into drama and left things on a good note. Appreciate your advice Actually was binge watching and subscribed ❤
Coach i messed up early in the relationship, i was flirty and i was still friends with my ex, but only because she said she wasn’t wanting a relationship. She recently left me for someone I thought was a friend. When I confronted her about it she used everything I did in the past against me. I acted out and tried to fight the guy and got into it with the family and said a lot of hurtful stuff and she said she hates me. 2 months since we talked she’s still seeing that ex friend of mine and looks to just be living her best life… I’m broken and I don’t think I want her back but I can’t help and think Does she even feel bad for what she did is she even feeling the break up, how can she be so cold. Is it maybe because I messed up in the beginning. Can you please talk about this cause I feel no coaches on TH-cam talk about going no contact or getting a ex back if we were toxic in the beginning but got our act right.
Hi, i think it is what it is. What do you think was she feeling, when you had contact to your Ex? Why do you have contact to your Ex and did explain her? How was your first time? Did you everything to feel her right and loved? Did you know her past(Last relationships, childhood)? Maybe she said she dont want a relationship, because she were hurt in the past. So she need to gut healing ...and someone to feel secure. When there is a guy who has contact to his ex, this shows her maybe she isnt right or secure.
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Im on my healing journey!! Let her live her best live without me!! Shes never coming back! And im never going back to her toxic family circle!!
I was in one of those relationships. I have finally reached the stage of not wanting him back. I realize it would never work without therapy, I have done my work. I don’t think he has done any.
Run ! Run ! Unsafe relationship
Yup. Break up no 3 lasted 7 months before she sent an apology text. Little too much little too late.
19 ‘break ups’ in 13 months. This was the last time. It’s been incredibly painful and ‘dis regulated’ nervous system’ really resonates with me
Coach Court that in the beginning was a "snap out of it":)
Im been on and off with a dismissive for 13 years she discarded me over 6 times. I asked her for respect and she twisted my words around as me trying to control her. I finally gave up on her been in no contact going on 5 weeks.
They always act like that, she will blame you for reacting to her mistakes as if you were supposed to do nothing.
13 years. 6 breakups.Man, are you ok? Did you get professional help?
If you are having a hard time determining if you can forgive all of the hurt imposed by the DA (some horrible HORRIBLE accusations and comments and actions) and you can’t bring yourself to actually enjoy your time with them because they will never discuss anything… and I’m the “nag” for always wanting to rehash because nothing is ever actually fixed…
Is it time to just go? I have been lonely for over 2 yrs if a 5 yr courtship… and I am afraid I can’t get over this as a true betrayal and the DA am does not do anything to fix it or work in it.
Then honestly, it may be time to let it go. If they are saying harmful things on top of avoiding, this sounds more like emotional abuse
The disclaimer at the beginning 😂
🤷🏾♂️😆
Was in a 3 year relationship and she pulled away multiple times and recently again. Haven’t talked to her in a few weeks. Starting to move on but I just know she will text me eventually.
The people reaching out are probably fearful avoidant, not DA. I think a lot of FAs mistype as DA, and most DAs would type as secure in the unusual circumstance that they took the test.
What does it mean if they never reaxh out? Except for a reply to a birthday wish you sent and in return wishing you on your bithday, both of which was within less than 10 months. Not a word extra. I know I shouldnt care but i need to hear this, whatver the answer, it will help me get clarity as there isnt any.
Do you want be with someone who doesn't care about you for 10 months? Its not love
How long were you two together? Did it end messily?
We were together for a year and it was the first time he actually made a commitment and got into a relationship. He told me prior to this he used to date only for a few months. He was keen to meet and used to initiate plans as and when he could. We met a week prior. Something ticked him off that day. And then out of the blue he said why don't you trust me (this was because of my past experience). Some of his actions used to trigger my past which made me ask him sometimes. But I didn't accuse him, I used to ask. It ended abruptly. We had a short conversation over text. I explained that im working on it. But he said he can't give it more time. Next day he checks in with me about how im doing and said that he cares about me. And dead silence after rhat until I wished. Saw a story or two on WA, as I didn't post often. But thats it. I'd appreciate if you could share your pov on the same. Haven't found any reason to comfort myself and move on from. The rejection feels too deep as he never came back even once.
I was with him only 4 weeks. In that time he was attentive, respectful always contacted me before and after a date. Great guy!! Then I had to tell him about a family member who is incarcerated ( he knew our circle of friends ) He let me know when I told him, I’m not upset or will hold that against you for not letting me know. That was Tuesday, I got call than on Saturday he called and said he really liked me a lot I’m a great person but actually looking for a clone of my deceased wife…… I say it’s bull and it had to do with my family member…. I honestly feel he has the right to leave the situation but should have been honest.
I immediately said it’s okay and understand. He said I really would love to stay friends and I agreed yet thought about it and won’t. Reason being he hasn’t reached out to ask how am I feeling …… Question, I’ve stopped going to the bar we all hang out in , karaoke etc Should I stay away a couple of weeks then go to see our circle of friends ? Of course I will say hello I’m not into drama and left things on a good note. Appreciate your advice
Actually was binge watching and subscribed ❤
Are u saying it takes them 9 months to a year to reach back out?!
Not at all. Just an example.
@@IamCoachCourt thx Coach
Mine came back after 9 months! Then dumped me again after six weeks.
Coach i messed up early in the relationship, i was flirty and i was still friends with my ex, but only because she said she wasn’t wanting a relationship. She recently left me for someone I thought was a friend. When I confronted her about it she used everything I did in the past against me. I acted out and tried to fight the guy and got into it with the family and said a lot of hurtful stuff and she said she hates me. 2 months since we talked she’s still seeing that ex friend of mine and looks to just be living her best life… I’m broken and I don’t think I want her back but I can’t help and think
Does she even feel bad for what she did is she even feeling the break up, how can she be so cold. Is it maybe because I messed up in the beginning.
Can you please talk about this cause I feel no coaches on TH-cam talk about going no contact or getting a ex back if we were toxic in the beginning but got our act right.
This is an interesting topic
Hi, i think it is what it is. What do you think was she feeling, when you had contact to your Ex? Why do you have contact to your Ex and did explain her?
How was your first time? Did you everything to feel her right and loved? Did you know her past(Last relationships, childhood)? Maybe she said she dont want a relationship, because she were hurt in the past. So she need to gut healing ...and someone to feel secure. When there is a guy who has contact to his ex, this shows her maybe she isnt right or secure.
What if the relationship was only for a year? It’s been 6 months of NC with my ex who dumped me. Should I be the one to reach out to him?
No!!!!