I’m 9 days postpartum and I just gave up my daughter for adoption. It was the hardest decision I have ever had to make, but I’m glad I was able to give her the life I couldn’t give her.
This made me cry so much!! I am 3 months post partum. I as well gave my baby girl, Ivanka up for adoption and it tore me to pieces leaving her alone in the hospital with the family. I am still with Ivanka's dad and I couldn't be happier. Ivanka needed a better life than what her dad and I could provide. Melissa- You and I are very strong people for chosing adoption. Most people don't understand that. ❤
I am so sorry you got tricked. I wish you had known about Saving Our Sisters. We would have provided you a place to live, help to finish school, and all of the baby items you need. th-cam.com/video/-2QRkiv3aBQ/w-d-xo.html
I was adopted, it didn't work out well. I love the way both families have choosen to handle this adoption, putting the needs of Zoey above all else. This little girl will be a well loved and well adjusted welcome addition to the world. A beautiful story, thank you.
That baby girl is amazingly cute!!! I did not know an adoption could go this way with the birthmother and the native grandparents being part of the child's life. Amazing!
Melissa, your story is truly inspiring! My name is Megan Sensenig & I just went through an open adoption with my baby boy who was born Oct. 1, 2017. weighing 7lbs & 4oz & was 18 inches long. I to have my good & my bad days as well. I was truly blessed to have a huge support system! Thank u for sharing your story! It lets me know that I am not alone. God bless you Melissa!😊
Open adoption is not legally enforceable. 75% of open adoptions close by the time the child is in kindergarten. My advice to you is do everything they tell you and agree with everything. Ex: If they like homeschooling, you like it. If they want to space out vaccines, you space out vaccines. If they want him in peewee football, you want him in peewee football.
Thank you for sharing your story. My husband are in the adoption process right now. Your story is another affirmation as to why open adoption is the route we wanted to take.
please only adopt a baby if there is no other way that child can have a home. make sure that you are ready and have all the resources you will need to do this. If you get and adoptable foster child who doesnt need to go home to his or her parents and this child chooses you. that would be a less damaging option then adopting some poor baby. i was adopted. the people who adopted me werent ready. they couldnt bear to have baby things around because of fallen through adoptions. because of this they pulled a drawer out halfway out of a chest of drawers and put me in it instead of a crib until they got one. they didnt get themselves checked out so later on he wound up having a medical operation that required surgery. once that sugery corrected things his fertility returened. they had their own children. especially the older one of the two was their perfect combination of physical and mental and emotional traits they needed in a child. i was an annoyance to them. i looked at things differently, my strengths and weaknesses were not acceptable. i was too different from them. Nothing i did ever pleased them. we dont even talk now that im an adult. it was a closed adoption so i never had a medical history of any kind until i was 38. i found my family on ancestery because i was lucky enough to find one of my first cousins who would talk to me on there. she gave my info to my brother and he talks to me now. unfortunately my mother died of a viralent reoccurring breast cancer so i will never meet her this side of heaven. fortunately i now know to get genetically tested so i can catch this before it can become a problem. I care about what happens to the Dennis family but only one of them his mother cares about me and i will not put her in a position of having to choose between me and them. I love my brother we belong together i never belonged to the Dennis family except legally. The man who thinks he is my father has admited that until now he wasnt sure but he wont tell me why hes so sure now but i still talk to him when he feels like it every couple of weeks. so i cant really say im a Seabury. I love my brother and my cousin but i dont really have a history with them yet so i cant really consider myself a Rodell. Nemo is laten for nobody so that is why i chose that. i ask that if you have any love in you not to do this to a baby. please and God bless you reguardless of what you choose.
My mom made the same decision but she had lost her mom so I imagine she felt alone which is sad. you are so lucky to have had such excellent support. I just tracked down my big brother's adoptive family.
What a beautiful story. A true testimony of a mothers love. This little girl have two amazing moms. Well done, congratulations and good luck with your bright future.
Such a beautiful story. You are a special young lady. I don't even know you and I'm so proud of you, your journey, and that you chose to share your story. Your parents also handles the news with Grace and an understanding heart(s).
Such a beautiful blessing you gave them Melissa! God put you on this Earth so they could be parents and what you did was so selfless and god will reward you tremendously in life and when you're ready to raise a family of your own! Baby's are a lot of work girl!
I truly hope you get to continue to be part of her life. Adoption is so hard at times to watch your child grow without you but always have a part of you
Well done to the adoptive parents..... They chose to love and taking care another's one child. So sorry for you Melissa , but that was not a mistake. That was a gift from god.
Oh wow. 😊 This story gives me a little push to share my story as a birthmother. It's. tough road but man oh man is it a blessing now. I'm thankful we have semi-open adoption so contact with the parents and our little blessing is frequent. If you ever wanna talk, I'm here to listen and share this precious part of life not many people talk about.
Beautiful story, beautiful family, and such a beautiful example of selfless love for a child! I have no doubt that Zoey will grow up with more people loving her than most "planned" children could ever dream of! Open adoption is such a beautiful thing to witness! Thank you for opening up and telling your story. Zoey is not only one blessed little girl, but clearly is also a blessing to everyone that loves her! God bless! 💗
First I'd like to say how brave you are and you gave a couple the greatest gift of all. I don't accept the phrase from so many who say "gave up baby for adoption". You give up something you don't want or don't need anymore. I call it *sacrificing motherhood for the greater good of your child.* That's what I did. It was hard to deal with my boyfriend at the time and we had quite an unhealthy relationship. So I went to the nearest adoption agency and talked to someone. It was one of the hardest decisions I had to make. The couple I chose are fantastic parents. And he is an only child just like I am. (She's a stay at home mom; he holds a high position where he works.) I gave birth 7 weeks early. He was 17 inches and 4 pounds, and he had to stay until he reached 5 pounds (13 days). I had postnatal bleeding and it drove me nuts! Since I lost a lot of blood giving birth, I was anemic for 3 months. Today he's a happy child that loves to read, paint, sing and is quite handsome. He will have a good future. I now am on disability, with a part time job, living with my mom. I don't know what the future holds for me, however, it's in God's hands. ~Jeremiah 29:11~
I want to thank all birthmothers for choosing life for your baby! It's the most selfless decision to give life to a child, and place them in another families arms. I am a mother of 2 now, but when my husband and I were in high school (15 and 16), we ended up with an unplanned pregnancy, and without the support from our mothers (both teen moms of us), we chose the selfish decision of abortion. It's a regret I have lived with for almost 9 years, and I'm sure for the rest of my life. Giving life is the most beautiful, selfless decision. and being willing to let someone else raise your child is so honorable.
birth mothers dont always get the thanks they deserve. i gave my baby up for adoption. not eveeyone thinks its an amazing decision. many other mothers look on birth mothers like we are horrible. it was the hardest but most rewarding decision i ever made. i used to feel guilty for not feeling guilty. i love seeing the other stories of birth mothers
Megan Adoption is a good thing. I’m sorry you don’t have the answers you want but family preservation isn’t always possible. Open adoption might have been a better option in your case unless your birth family was violent or abusive. I hope you find the answers you want but I’d much rather children be given life and adopted. Children are innocent. They deserve to be given the chance to live. If that’s with a family they’re not blood related to then as long as they’re loved and have a family to go home to what does it matter? You can get different test to see if you have medical issues but if you aren’t having medical issues why is it a problem? There are a load of medical issues in my family and to my knowledge I don’t have any of them. Yes it would be great to know for the future but it’s ok. Roll with it. No matter what happens your family are the people who love and take care of you. Blood does not define your family. The connections and relationships you choose define it. One day you can search for your history and maybe you’ll find it, even if you don’t, live in the present. You’re life is your own it doesn’t matter where you came from. Some questions never get answered but don’t let those questions rule your life. If you come across the answers then that’s good. If you don’t it’s ok. In the end it won’t matter, just the family that you love and that love you back will matter regardless of how it formed.
You're such a brave woman with great strength. That lil beauty is here because of you. You have created such a gift for all. My sister placed two babies up for adoption. That takes so much strength. You did what was best for everyone...especially that lil girl Be proud of yourself. I am proud of you.
Thank you Melissa for sharing your beautiful story. I adopted my daughter almost 13 years ago through an open adoption. I can honestly say that I still made the right choice having an open adoption. For every person involved in my story of adopting the open adoption was the best fit. I not only adopted a beautiful daughter but also a whole entire family. She calls her birrth mother by name and as for aunts and uncles and grandparents and cousins...they all are called by their titles. She is a young lady with an amazing story of love and compassion, She will never have to feel empty or like she is breaking our hearts looking for her bio parents...instead we all celebrate her life together and love one another. I truly didn't just get to adopt a beautiful daughter...I was blessed by God with an entire new branch on my family tree filled with wonderful and amazing people that love me, my husband and my mom as their family as well. I will never for a single second regret my decision to adopt through an open adoption. Thank you for loving Zoe enough to give her an amazing life filled with many more people to love her.
Baby's are blessings ! My baby boy changed my life to good and I thank god everyday for changing my life. I'm not the same person and looking back I tell myself why I was like that. My baby changed me. I love my baby a lot ❤️
Baby is really a blessing. It is becoming common in many countries. I have been always confused between surrogacy and adoption. But I think that the confusion is no more left now. I will be going for surrogacy now. I hope surrogacy works for me. Thanks for uploading this.
Adoption and surrogacy are not the same thing. With adoption you welcome life already created. You are saving life. With surrogacy a lot of lifes may be at stake as some of created embryos end up not being implanted or experimented upon. It is a selfish approach. If you went through with it, Please do not leave any created embryo without the opportunity of being born. They are human beings and deserve to be treated with dignity.
I honestly think there is a bad stigma about having a baby under 25.. why do people really think it’s the end of their world to be pregnant and the whole “we will help you through it”. Like it’s a baby, they come with responsibilities, but no biggie, you just keep going and work hard at it. You don’t have to have a house, furniture, a car, be married or great job to have a baby, you can have a baby and still stay at home, you can work a minimum wage job, you can do it on your own or with support.. babies won’t end your life, they may make it harder, but it’s achievable..who knows, you might even come to love that person more than life itself.
I also strongly feel the same. Little Zoe was lucky because her mum and grandparents were deeply religious people. Otherwise she would have been aborted. How sad that so many babies are murdered by their own mothers. Why kill your own child. If you think you can't bring up the child you can at least do what Melissa did. Give it to people who are desperate for a baby. I think some women are sick. They cant keep holes shut and when they become pregnant they kill the baby.
I placed my only kid in open adoption. What is important is that he is safe and secure. Even though he does not want to talk to me I wish him all the best.
That is so beautiful how you did your plan and you're even going to be a part of your baby's life and always see pictures I think that is amazing God bless all of you
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I too, have been in your shoes, and chose the same thing for my baby girl, and I resonate so deeply with everything you said.... I felt every word.
What a amazing story. Zoë is a very lucky little girl. A mother who loved her so that she made the hardest decision in her life to better her child and for both of the adopted parents you will love her so much.💗
Open adoption is the hardest option for the new parents at first, but it is the best for the children (and eventually for both sets of parents) in most cases.
Patricia Flanagan this couple have a little boy also that they adopted through open adoption and they are the same with the little boys birth mother still supporting her and being there and allowing her to be apart of his life growing up etc... just like they’re doing with the little girls birth mother in this video. So no it’s not a scam! Yes some parents who adopt a child through open adoption will just cut off contact with the birth mother but not always, most of the time they stay in contact with the birth mother unless she’s asked them not too! Melissa Link and her husband have another mini documentary on her called “The Texas 48Hours adoption.” Or something very close to that title showing the little boys adoption. X
Melissa, Your courage is astounding! Placing a baby for adoption is one of the hardest things a person can ever do. But it's understandable and commendable that your decision was made purely out of love and concern for Zoey. With the open adoption she will understand why you made that decision and you will get to see her grow and know her intimately. What's really wonderful is that your parents were so supportive from the beginning, although it must have been very hard for them as well. And for them to offer help and advice for someone else in need is awesome! God bless
jacky o I took my grandchildren on I could not bear to let them be adopted not all grandparents are able too do that it is hard work but hopefully my grandchildren will grow up and appreciate me.
You don't place a baby. You give your baby away. Do not use subtle coercive languages practices of the multibillion dollar, loosely regulated, uncredetialed adoption industry.
Ddrama Llama Mmama I know this is 3 months ago, but I am crying my heart out for you.... I am so so sorry Mama...... did your parents accept you back and help you through the grieving process??
You have such a beautiful story! I cried so much and I hope that someday a expectant mother will choose me and my husband to be the parents for her precious child. Thank-you so much for sharing
I've got two sons. When I think about giving them away to someone else I physically get sick. I will never understand how anyone can give their child away.
I'm 15 yrs after going through this, and WISH I'd gotten to hear stories of what it would be like. Open adoption is wonderful, but more people need to hear what it's like to give up a baby. If there's no support but there taboo against abortion or being a single mom, you have no idea what you're asking a birthmom to do. There's NO easy choice.
Such a mature young lady. While I agree that Zoe has a wonderful life with her adoptive parents, the support she had from her parents and her own maturity lead me to wonder why she didn't choose to parent herself. I was 16 when I fell pregnant and 17 when I gave birth to my son 35 years ago. I had always been, like Melissa, the "good girl", but I knew that the reception that I would get when I told them I was pregnant wouldn't be positive and it wasn't. I had asked my mother, when I told her on Thursday evening that I was pregnant, not to tell my father until he returned from night duty, and I had gone to school. I wanted him to have a sleep and be calm when I got home. Instead, on the morning of the Year 10 farewell ( this is in Australia), I have the Principal and Mistress in Charge of Girls call me out from Science and ask me if I fear my father. At first I say "No" but then I asked them what mood my father was in. The Principal informed me they had called the Police. I then told them I was pregnant and they said " My God" and quickly hussled me into an office and told me to hide under the table and locked the door telling me not to open it. I then threw up into the trash can and when the Police Officer and teacher came in they both looked at me in disgust. I felt SO ashamed. The PO told me that my sad was "pretty upset" and they would take me home. So I left school that day in between 2 officers in a Police wagon, with parents of Y 10 kids looking at me. My dad told me I "ruined my life" and, to finish, that I married my child's father or stayed with them and broke up with him. My boyfriend didn't want to get married, so I had to let him go. My father didn't talk to me for 8 months and left the room if I entered. I eventually married my baby's father and had 4 more kids. He left me for another woman, but, 14 years later, I still love him, sad to say, and now care for his 96 year old dad. My son and I are not close, but I don't regret having him!
As Zoey grows, is the hope that she will understand the concept of birth mother and the concept of “daily” parents? As you can tell, I’m not completely clear how to phrase the question, but at the root, I’m trying to understand how a child comprehends 2 moms. When she gets older and her “daily” mom upsets her, she may express the desire to go to her birth mother? I’m sure there are ways to navigate- it definitely adds more layers to the relationships. But the alternative, knowing you’re adopted and not knowing your birth parents could add even more upset, hurt and confusion. Or worse, not being told all along that you were adopted would be like getting a rug pulled out from under you.
It’s not guarantee she would reproduce though…that’s the thing about life their are no guarantees and to be so possessive over grandchildren is strange.
Children are just a blessing. I am really happy you get it. I know the journey requires much patience. But I am happy you did it. Haha! your bump is too pretty. You are a beautiful lady. Thank you for motivating me through your video. Many prayers for you and your baby. Baby dust to you!
I feel so sad about this story. It is definetely a culture matter how different countries look to this. I am 100% sure that if she lived in my country, the Netherlands, she didn't give her child away. Here there are only maximum 15 adoption from a Dutch child per year.
What a great story. Everyone involved was so decent and all they wanted was the best out come for the child. When I was a teenager I met several girls who had under age pregnancies that all ended with the girl being forced by their family to under go an abortion, and all of them were screwed up as a result. Obviously this all starts and ends with young people having sexual relationships too early, just a little note that in each case I knew of the father was well over the legal age but the mother wasn't. Thank goodness there's a kinder more humane way of doing these adoptions now, in the past here in the UK the poor mother's were often shamed, humiliated and locked up til their babies were born in dreadful work house facilities but todays kindness still doesn't address the initial problem of young women becoming pregnant too soon. Does anyone have a workable answer...
Oh so so so so many cases screw over the father. Check out www.exposingadoption.wordpress.com and in the search bar type in "the adoption industry strips fathers of their rights".
I have no doubt that he was a part of the decision, but as for how big of a role he played, I'm not sure. However, I think that in making this documentary, they wanted to fully respect the birth father's privacy (as they should) and just focus on the main purpose of telling this beautiful story, which was to show how much of a blessing adoption has been for this family! 😊 God bless! 💗
th-cam.com/video/fY7TcOQOM5g/w-d-xo.html The link to the the other mini documentary about this couples open adoption of their adopted son. So now they’ve got a young boy and girl that are growing up together with amazing parents. X
Good that the baby got to get placed in a fabulous family, but I have mixed feelings on her decision. She could have kept the baby. It is obviously going to be hard, but possible and what wouldn't you do for your baby.
It's really hard to see babies given away for convenience. God gives us what we NEED not what we WANT. It's sad that she did what she did apparently out of religious guilt. What HE wants is not always what WE want. Babies and pregnancies are meant to join our journey, not be an obstacle we must detour around. The direction of our journey merely takes a new path. Financially, there is ALWAYS a way. Children need their real mothers NOT material things. A little is still enough when you have your family. The excuse of giving the child what the mom can't is not just. Children don't need fancy clothes, private schools, vacations, or homes with swimming pools. They need their REAL mom, even if there is no father. Wanting to continue on with University life and maintain the family reputation is selfish. Selflessness is making self sacrifice and being proud of, not embarrassed by a baby........ Kitten's Mom
Is it convenience or responsibility? Sometimes if you don’t have support it’s not ideal to raise a child in an environment that is chaotic and out of order. It took two people to make a baby. Babies don’t stay babies forever. They grow up and when they do that partnership and support system established from when they are a baby is vital.
How does open adoption help the birth mother before, during, and after the process of giving her child up ? Should open adoption be encourage for every birth mother?
For me, as a birthmom who did open adoption, it means that 15yrs ago I got to pick out amazing parents for my baby. After all these years, even though I don't see her in person (by choice and for various reasons) I know she is well cared for and happy. She knows where and how to find me, I know how she is in general. It's peace of mind. How many kids get handpicked parents? It's NOT easy, but it was the best decision for everyone. And I mean everyone. Birthfather knows too.
A little bit of Paradis (here on TH-cam) has a lovely adoption story that involves the father who is still with the birth mother. They simply were not able to parent another child at that point in their life and placed their baby girl with his sister and her husband.
Very inspiring story and thank God you chose to give your baby life over abortion and was selfless enough to place baby with a loving family. but I've noticed with adoptions it seems dad isn't involved? did he know u was pregnant... sometimes dad's family can keep the baby at least it's raised close by the parent. I had a baby 2 years ago, her dad didn't want nothing to do with her infact he asked me many times to abort. I was stuck but thankfully had my mother who stuck by me and helped me so much. despite all the struggles I go through with her I wouldn't change it for the world. money isn't everything or opportunities. God places these babies in us for a reason! and at the right time no baby is a mistake or just don't have sex before marriage or use contraception if you don't want kids especially that young. money, materials etc aren't what children need but a mothers love is what they mostly need. that can come later even in 3 yrs or so with patience and hard work. but we all know what's best for ourselves and I truly hope you're happy with your open adoption. I've seen kids resent the birth mum even hate regardless of being kind of around in an open adoption. I gave birth 2 months after you so thought I would comment. you're very brave for what you did either way and hope goes well
I love these documented stories as it gives me hope my husband and I will be chosen soon 💜 we live in Missouri, we're going through Angel Adoption. If you are a birth mother in need of a loving family, please view the Kaat family through Angel Adoption 💜 www.angeladoptioninc.com/adoption-family/profile/jeremy-jes/
Good parents want what's best for their kid, wouldn't you agree? Even if that means giving them up. Think of the story of King Solomon saying he'd cut the baby in half. The real mother preferred to give up the baby. Caring IS part of sanity. It's still love.
I just couldn't stop crying watching this . Why are some men so heartless. Why tell an innocent girl that you can't continue the relationship unless they have sex with you and when you plant your seed how can you just go like that.??? Only sick men take advantage of women's vulnerabilities. A gentleman will never do that to a woman or his child. And I was even mad at her when she mentioned her adoption plan. But seeing how it ended up, it seems she got lucky. May be God, the Universe, whatever, knows that she is innocent. Lol last statement sounds childish.
I really think the father should have been told ..you didn't make that baby by yourself maybe you couldn't be. Bothered to raise your baby but he deserved to know he made a child. I don't know how on earth anybody could give their baby away ??? I'd give my kidney up before my baby.
Well, this is why women choose abortion. They get criticized no matter what they do. She did what she felt she could handle, feel free to make your own choices. Lucky for you no one is standing there judging yours.
Purity culture is so dangerous 😢 normal human behavior is what it is and you can’t change that fact so the shame young people are saddled with is so wrong why? Because these kids fail for just being a normal human being? Is waiting for marriage ideal? Obviously yes but it’s not the only way thankfully her parents were supportive of her unfortunately not all girls are as lucky as she is we have to change the narrative 😢
I'm not seeing enough of owning the sexual irresponsibility aspect. Of this. It's not a mistake because I love my daughter" nonsense! go visit a prison , interview them on their parents. The night of conception you could've caught a disease. Having unwed younger parents , I know the practice needs to end
I’m 9 days postpartum and I just gave up my daughter for adoption. It was the hardest decision I have ever had to make, but I’m glad I was able to give her the life I couldn’t give her.
God be with you
Please stay in her life and make yourself the best you you can be...she will be better for having you in her life and so will you
This made me cry so much!! I am 3 months post partum. I as well gave my baby girl, Ivanka up for adoption and it tore me to pieces leaving her alone in the hospital with the family. I am still with Ivanka's dad and I couldn't be happier. Ivanka needed a better life than what her dad and I could provide. Melissa- You and I are very strong people for chosing adoption. Most people don't understand that. ❤
Stephanie Taylor did you not consider termination not saying your wrong I think your brave just wondered.
I am so sorry you got tricked. I wish you had known about Saving Our Sisters. We would have provided you a place to live, help to finish school, and all of the baby items you need. th-cam.com/video/-2QRkiv3aBQ/w-d-xo.html
You didn't choose adoption. You were tricked into it. I'm so sorry.
Megan grow up! She wasn’t tricked.
@@rootedtogrowwny why are you being so mean spirited? Is your desire to inflict pain? Please stop.
I like that she never had to say goodbye to her baby.
Thank you for coming from an adoptee. What a beautiful story for all of you.
A very beautiful story - thank you, Melissa, for your courageous choice of adoption!
I was adopted, it didn't work out well. I love the way both families have choosen to handle this adoption, putting the needs of Zoey above all else. This little girl will be a well loved and well adjusted welcome addition to the world. A beautiful story, thank you.
Neither did mine as my bio family HATES my existence. Well close bio family.
electricgrace1 m sorry your adoption didn’t work out well this is all too common.
Megan That's their decision and I can see why as you spew hatred toward adoption.
I decided to spew hatred towards adoption AFTER their vile treatment towards me. So get it right you sorry dumbfuck.
Hey dumbass if you had the whole story you'd be aware even the POLICE are disgusted at them! You don't have the full story so shove it mate!
Thank you for giving the gift of Life to not only your daughter but to so many others. You are an amazing young lady.
That baby girl is amazingly cute!!! I did not know an adoption could go this way with the birthmother and the native grandparents being part of the child's life. Amazing!
Melissa, your story is truly inspiring! My name is Megan Sensenig & I just went through an open adoption with my baby boy who was born Oct. 1, 2017. weighing 7lbs & 4oz & was 18 inches long. I to have my good & my bad days as well. I was truly blessed to have a huge support system! Thank u for sharing your story! It lets me know that I am not alone. God bless you Melissa!😊
Megan Sensenig Hello again. You and I she to be watching the same things. Such a beautiful story!
Open adoption is not legally enforceable. 75% of open adoptions close by the time the child is in kindergarten. My advice to you is do everything they tell you and agree with everything. Ex: If they like homeschooling, you like it. If they want to space out vaccines, you space out vaccines. If they want him in peewee football, you want him in peewee football.
As I was watching this I literally felt like I was hearing my own story told to me! Our stories are almost identical.
Thank you for sharing your story. My husband are in the adoption process right now. Your story is another affirmation as to why open adoption is the route we wanted to take.
God bless you and your husband! I pray that God blesses you with a child soon. I'm sure you'll be wonderful parents! 💗
Thank you Brittany!
Adopt only a baby born on drugs or an abused child. Kids who need a loving home. God bless.
Megan you are crazy.
please only adopt a baby if there is no other way that child can have a home. make sure that you are ready and have all the resources you will need to do this. If you get and adoptable foster child who doesnt need to go home to his or her parents and this child chooses you. that would be a less damaging option then adopting some poor baby. i was adopted. the people who adopted me werent ready. they couldnt bear to have baby things around because of fallen through adoptions. because of this they pulled a drawer out halfway out of a chest of drawers and put me in it instead of a crib until they got one. they didnt get themselves checked out so later on he wound up having a medical operation that required surgery. once that sugery corrected things his fertility returened. they had their own children. especially the older one of the two was their perfect combination of physical and mental and emotional traits they needed in a child. i was an annoyance to them. i looked at things differently, my strengths and weaknesses were not acceptable. i was too different from them. Nothing i did ever pleased them. we dont even talk now that im an adult. it was a closed adoption so i never had a medical history of any kind until i was 38. i found my family on ancestery because i was lucky enough to find one of my first cousins who would talk to me on there. she gave my info to my brother and he talks to me now. unfortunately my mother died of a viralent reoccurring breast cancer so i will never meet her this side of heaven. fortunately i now know to get genetically tested so i can catch this before it can become a problem. I care about what happens to the Dennis family but only one of them his mother cares about me and i will not put her in a position of having to choose between me and them. I love my brother we belong together i never belonged to the Dennis family except legally. The man who thinks he is my father has admited that until now he wasnt sure but he wont tell me why hes so sure now but i still talk to him when he feels like it every couple of weeks. so i cant really say im a Seabury. I love my brother and my cousin but i dont really have a history with them yet so i cant really consider myself a Rodell. Nemo is laten for nobody so that is why i chose that. i ask that if you have any love in you not to do this to a baby. please and God bless you reguardless of what you choose.
My mom made the same decision but she had lost her mom so I imagine she felt alone which is sad. you are so lucky to have had such excellent support. I just tracked down my big brother's adoptive family.
What a beautiful story. A true testimony of a mothers love. This little girl have two amazing moms. Well done, congratulations and good luck with your bright future.
Wow!! What an amazing story. Zoe is so lucky to have such great role models and she's so adorable.
Such a beautiful story. You are a special young lady. I don't even know you and I'm so proud of you, your journey, and that you chose to share your story. Your parents also handles the news with Grace and an understanding heart(s).
Such a beautiful blessing you gave them Melissa! God put you on this Earth so they could be parents and what you did was so selfless and god will reward you tremendously in life and when you're ready to raise a family of your own! Baby's are a lot of work girl!
Beautiful story. Your sacrifice is something to admire. Bless you all.
I truly hope you get to continue to be part of her life. Adoption is so hard at times to watch your child grow without you but always have a part of you
Well done to the adoptive parents..... They chose to love and taking care another's one child.
So sorry for you Melissa , but that was not a mistake. That was a gift from god.
What a courageous mom Zoe has...
Oh wow. 😊 This story gives me a little push to share my story as a birthmother. It's. tough road but man oh man is it a blessing now. I'm thankful we have semi-open adoption so contact with the parents and our little blessing is frequent.
If you ever wanna talk, I'm here to listen and share this precious part of life not many people talk about.
As a birth mother, in what ways did semi open adoption help you with the process of parting ways with your child?
Hi. I would like to talk to you is it possible ?
Beautiful story, beautiful family, and such a beautiful example of selfless love for a child! I have no doubt that Zoey will grow up with more people loving her than most "planned" children could ever dream of! Open adoption is such a beautiful thing to witness! Thank you for opening up and telling your story. Zoey is not only one blessed little girl, but clearly is also a blessing to everyone that loves her! God bless! 💗
First I'd like to say how brave you are and you gave a couple the greatest gift of all. I don't accept the phrase from so many who say "gave up baby for adoption". You give up something you don't want or don't need anymore. I call it *sacrificing motherhood for the greater good of your child.* That's what I did. It was hard to deal with my boyfriend at the time and we had quite an unhealthy relationship. So I went to the nearest adoption agency and talked to someone. It was one of the hardest decisions I had to make. The couple I chose are fantastic parents. And he is an only child just like I am. (She's a stay at home mom; he holds a high position where he works.) I gave birth 7 weeks early. He was 17 inches and 4 pounds, and he had to stay until he reached 5 pounds (13 days). I had postnatal bleeding and it drove me nuts! Since I lost a lot of blood giving birth, I was anemic for 3 months. Today he's a happy child that loves to read, paint, sing and is quite handsome. He will have a good future. I now am on disability, with a part time job, living with my mom. I don't know what the future holds for me, however, it's in God's hands. ~Jeremiah 29:11~
I want to thank all birthmothers for choosing life for your baby! It's the most selfless decision to give life to a child, and place them in another families arms. I am a mother of 2 now, but when my husband and I were in high school (15 and 16), we ended up with an unplanned pregnancy, and without the support from our mothers (both teen moms of us), we chose the selfish decision of abortion. It's a regret I have lived with for almost 9 years, and I'm sure for the rest of my life. Giving life is the most beautiful, selfless decision. and being willing to let someone else raise your child is so honorable.
Barf.
I'm supposed to be grateful for losing 9 siblings, my family health history, my first mother, and my heritages?
Adoption is not the answer to abortion. The answer is family preservation.
birth mothers dont always get the thanks they deserve. i gave my baby up for adoption. not eveeyone thinks its an amazing decision. many other mothers look on birth mothers like we are horrible. it was the hardest but most rewarding decision i ever made. i used to feel guilty for not feeling guilty. i love seeing the other stories of birth mothers
Megan
Adoption is a good thing. I’m sorry you don’t have the answers you want but family preservation isn’t always possible. Open adoption might have been a better option in your case unless your birth family was violent or abusive. I hope you find the answers you want but I’d much rather children be given life and adopted. Children are innocent. They deserve to be given the chance to live. If that’s with a family they’re not blood related to then as long as they’re loved and have a family to go home to what does it matter? You can get different test to see if you have medical issues but if you aren’t having medical issues why is it a problem? There are a load of medical issues in my family and to my knowledge I don’t have any of them. Yes it would be great to know for the future but it’s ok. Roll with it. No matter what happens your family are the people who love and take care of you. Blood does not define your family. The connections and relationships you choose define it. One day you can search for your history and maybe you’ll find it, even if you don’t, live in the present. You’re life is your own it doesn’t matter where you came from. Some questions never get answered but don’t let those questions rule your life. If you come across the answers then that’s good. If you don’t it’s ok. In the end it won’t matter, just the family that you love and that love you back will matter regardless of how it formed.
You're such a brave woman with great strength. That lil beauty is here because of you. You have created such a gift for all. My sister placed two babies up for adoption. That takes so much strength. You did what was best for everyone...especially that lil girl Be proud of yourself. I am proud of you.
Thank you Melissa for sharing your beautiful story. I adopted my daughter almost 13 years ago through an open adoption. I can honestly say that I still made the right choice having an open adoption. For every person involved in my story of adopting the open adoption was the best fit. I not only adopted a beautiful daughter but also a whole entire family. She calls her birrth mother by name and as for aunts and uncles and grandparents and cousins...they all are called by their titles. She is a young lady with an amazing story of love and compassion, She will never have to feel empty or like she is breaking our hearts looking for her bio parents...instead we all celebrate her life together and love one another. I truly didn't just get to adopt a beautiful daughter...I was blessed by God with an entire new branch on my family tree filled with wonderful and amazing people that love me, my husband and my mom as their family as well. I will never for a single second regret my decision to adopt through an open adoption.
Thank you for loving Zoe enough to give her an amazing life filled with many more people to love her.
sandi colee yui
Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you for doing and keeping an open adoption! I applaud you so much. You mean a lot to me.
Baby's are blessings ! My baby boy changed my life to good and I thank god everyday for changing my life. I'm not the same person and looking back I tell myself why I was like that. My baby changed me. I love my baby a lot ❤️
Baby is really a blessing. It is becoming common in many countries. I have been always confused between surrogacy and adoption. But I think that the confusion is no more left now. I will be going for surrogacy now. I hope surrogacy works for me. Thanks for uploading this.
Adoption and surrogacy are not the same thing. With adoption you welcome life already created. You are saving life. With surrogacy a lot of lifes may be at stake as some of created embryos end up not being implanted or experimented upon. It is a selfish approach. If you went through with it, Please do not leave any created embryo without the opportunity of being born. They are human beings and deserve to be treated with dignity.
I honestly think there is a bad stigma about having a baby under 25.. why do people really think it’s the end of their world to be pregnant and the whole “we will help you through it”. Like it’s a baby, they come with responsibilities, but no biggie, you just keep going and work hard at it. You don’t have to have a house, furniture, a car, be married or great job to have a baby, you can have a baby and still stay at home, you can work a minimum wage job, you can do it on your own or with support.. babies won’t end your life, they may make it harder, but it’s achievable..who knows, you might even come to love that person more than life itself.
I also strongly feel the same. Little Zoe was lucky because her mum and grandparents were deeply religious people. Otherwise she would have been aborted. How sad that so many babies are murdered by their own mothers. Why kill your own child. If you think you can't bring up the child you can at least do what Melissa did. Give it to people who are desperate for a baby. I think some women are sick. They cant keep holes shut and when they become pregnant they kill the baby.
Thats good encouragement
I placed my only kid in open adoption. What is important is that he is safe and secure. Even though he does not want to talk to me I wish him all the best.
That is so beautiful how you did your plan and you're even going to be a part of your baby's life and always see pictures I think that is amazing God bless all of you
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I too, have been in your shoes, and chose the same thing for my baby girl, and I resonate so deeply with everything you said.... I felt every word.
What a amazing story. Zoë is a very lucky little girl. A mother who loved her so that she made the hardest decision in her life to better her child and for both of the adopted parents you will love her so much.💗
She didn't make a decision. The adoption industry uses a ton of propaganda.
Open adoption is the hardest option for the new parents at first, but it is the best for the children (and eventually for both sets of parents) in most cases.
If it remains open.
Cecilia Liz thanks for your comment! I can’t stand to see so many adoption detractors!
Patricia Flanagan this couple have a little boy also that they adopted through open adoption and they are the same with the little boys birth mother still supporting her and being there and allowing her to be apart of his life growing up etc... just like they’re doing with the little girls birth mother in this video. So no it’s not a scam! Yes some parents who adopt a child through open adoption will just cut off contact with the birth mother but not always, most of the time they stay in contact with the birth mother unless she’s asked them not too! Melissa Link and her husband have another mini documentary on her called “The Texas 48Hours adoption.” Or something very close to that title showing the little boys adoption. X
How is open adoption the hardest option for new parents?
There is also closed adoption and semi-open
wouldn't open adoption be the better decision ?
Melissa, Your courage is astounding! Placing a baby for adoption is one of the hardest things a person can ever do. But it's understandable and commendable that your decision was made purely out of love and concern for Zoey. With the open adoption she will understand why you made that decision and you will get to see her grow and know her intimately. What's really wonderful is that your parents were so supportive from the beginning, although it must have been very hard for them as well. And for them to offer help and advice for someone else in need is awesome! God bless
jacky o I took my grandchildren on I could not bear to let them be adopted not all grandparents are able too do that it is hard work but hopefully my grandchildren will grow up and appreciate me.
You don't place a baby. You give your baby away. Do not use subtle coercive languages practices of the multibillion dollar, loosely regulated, uncredetialed adoption industry.
Melissa, you are a true hero! Thank you for the gift of adoption. It is so interesting to hear your perspective! ❤️
You're so lucky. My dad kicked me out and my mom was beyond mad. I ended up having a miscarriage. Thank you for your story.
Ddrama Llama Mmama I know this is 3 months ago, but I am crying my heart out for you.... I am so so sorry Mama...... did your parents accept you back and help you through the grieving process??
Hi girl it was years ago but I tend towards having an abortion instead . Adoption seems so hard
Especially for the baby
@LittleRedPixi No, they didn't. Not a first. it's a long story, but about 10 years later my mom apologized, and I still think about her (the baby now)
We had such a similar story! We are six years in. Thanks for sharing!
Awww that made me cry...
That lil girl is beautiful!!!
What a courageous woman you are! Thank you for choosing life. Your daughter is beautiful!
Beautiful baby and beautiful story!
I love this story. I'm so glad you are a brave and strong woman who made tough decisions and then shared it with the world
You have such a beautiful story! I cried so much and I hope that someday a expectant mother will choose me and my husband to be the parents for her precious child. Thank-you so much for sharing
What a vulture.
Instead of helping a mother keep her baby you want to spend tens of thousands of dollars on taking her baby from her.
You want to be a mother? There's plenty of abused children who need homes.
Beautiful baby with a beautiful story 💚💛💜❤️💙
Amazing to watch this...thank you for creating it and sharing...
You are such a strong woman, I am only 11 years old, but I understand how hard It was for sure my new role model❤️
Thank you for sharing your beautiful story!
I've got two sons. When I think about giving them away to someone else I physically get sick. I will never understand how anyone can give their child away.
Beautiful story, and beautiful baby....
What happens if the dad wants to have custody of the child himself?? What if the birth mom doesn’t tell the dad & give him the option??
Beautiful story.
I'm 15 yrs after going through this, and WISH I'd gotten to hear stories of what it would be like. Open adoption is wonderful, but more people need to hear what it's like to give up a baby. If there's no support but there taboo against abortion or being a single mom, you have no idea what you're asking a birthmom to do. There's NO easy choice.
Lovely story Melissa :)
Such a mature young lady. While I agree that Zoe has a wonderful life with her adoptive parents, the support she had from her parents and her own maturity lead me to wonder why she didn't choose to parent herself. I was 16 when I fell pregnant and 17 when I gave birth to my son 35 years ago. I had always been, like Melissa, the "good girl", but I knew that the reception that I would get when I told them I was pregnant wouldn't be positive and it wasn't. I had asked my mother, when I told her on Thursday evening that I was pregnant, not to tell my father until he returned from night duty, and I had gone to school. I wanted him to have a sleep and be calm when I got home. Instead, on the morning of the Year 10 farewell ( this is in Australia), I have the Principal and Mistress in Charge of Girls call me out from Science and ask me if I fear my father. At first I say "No" but then I asked them what mood my father was in. The Principal informed me they had called the Police. I then told them I was pregnant and they said " My God" and quickly hussled me into an office and told me to hide under the table and locked the door telling me not to open it. I then threw up into the trash can and when the Police Officer and teacher came in they both looked at me in disgust. I felt SO ashamed. The PO told me that my sad was "pretty upset" and they would take me home. So I left school that day in between 2 officers in a Police wagon, with parents of Y 10 kids looking at me. My dad told me I "ruined my life" and, to finish, that I married my child's father or stayed with them and broke up with him. My boyfriend didn't want to get married, so I had to let him go. My father didn't talk to me for 8 months and left the room if I entered. I eventually married my baby's father and had 4 more kids. He left me for another woman, but, 14 years later, I still love him, sad to say, and now care for his 96 year old dad. My son and I are not close, but I don't regret having him!
What a gorgeous little girl, so precious. What a lovely thing you did xx
As Zoey grows, is the hope that she will understand the concept of birth mother and the concept of “daily” parents? As you can tell, I’m not completely clear how to phrase the question, but at the root, I’m trying to understand how a child comprehends 2 moms. When she gets older and her “daily” mom upsets her, she may express the desire to go to her birth mother? I’m sure there are ways to navigate- it definitely adds more layers to the relationships. But the alternative, knowing you’re adopted and not knowing your birth parents could add even more upset, hurt and confusion. Or worse, not being told all along that you were adopted would be like getting a rug pulled out from under you.
You are so, but so brave!!!
Nicely done, thank you.
If that was my daughter i would have done ANYTHING to help her keep MY grandbaby
Me, too!
Me three 💚
It’s not guarantee she would reproduce though…that’s the thing about life their are no guarantees and to be so possessive over grandchildren is strange.
Children are just a blessing. I am really happy you get it. I know the journey requires much patience. But I am happy you did it. Haha! your bump is too pretty. You are a beautiful lady. Thank you for motivating me through your video. Many prayers for you and your baby. Baby dust to you!
You are so strong.....They are so Blessed....=)
I would love to share my story, any guidance?
I’m a birth mom too. I feel this on all the levels:
I feel so sad about this story. It is definetely a culture matter how different countries look to this. I am 100% sure that if she lived in my country, the Netherlands, she didn't give her child away. Here there are only maximum 15 adoption from a Dutch child per year.
What a great story. Everyone involved was so decent and all they wanted was the best out come for the child.
When I was a teenager I met several girls who had under age pregnancies that all ended with the girl being forced by their family to under go an abortion, and all of them were screwed up as a result. Obviously this all starts and ends with young people having sexual relationships too early, just a little note that in each case I knew of the father was well over the legal age but the mother wasn't. Thank goodness there's a kinder more humane way of doing these adoptions now, in the past here in the UK the poor mother's were often shamed, humiliated and locked up til their babies were born in dreadful work house facilities but todays kindness still doesn't address the initial problem of young women becoming pregnant too soon. Does anyone have a workable answer...
Beautiful and brave.
And that is how it can and perhaps should in most cases be done 🥰🙏🏻🙏🏻
Wait she didn't even contact the father?
Oh so so so so many cases screw over the father. Check out www.exposingadoption.wordpress.com and in the search bar type in "the adoption industry strips fathers of their rights".
That's what I was waiting to finish the video to ask! Wow that's a little selfish IMO.
@@peggybaby0894 what do you consider selfish?
What happened to the dad? Did he want adoption?
I have no doubt that he was a part of the decision, but as for how big of a role he played, I'm not sure. However, I think that in making this documentary, they wanted to fully respect the birth father's privacy (as they should) and just focus on the main purpose of telling this beautiful story, which was to show how much of a blessing adoption has been for this family! 😊 God bless! 💗
There's no such thing as birthparent privacy.
Beautiful
That specific girl is my little cousin witch is why I looked this up
ShallWe?TV then you come from a very good family! 💛
Which!! Sorry, I'm OCD about spelling , beautiful family and Zoe is the cutest baby ever 💙❤️💜💛💚
th-cam.com/video/fY7TcOQOM5g/w-d-xo.html
The link to the the other mini documentary about this couples open adoption of their adopted son. So now they’ve got a young boy and girl that are growing up together with amazing parents. X
Good that the baby got to get placed in a fabulous family, but I have mixed feelings on her decision. She could have kept the baby. It is obviously going to be hard, but possible and what wouldn't you do for your baby.
It's really hard to see babies given away for convenience. God gives us what we NEED not what we WANT. It's sad that she did what she did apparently out of religious guilt. What HE wants is not always what WE want. Babies and pregnancies are meant to join our journey, not be an obstacle we must detour around. The direction of our journey merely takes a new path. Financially, there is ALWAYS a way. Children need their real mothers NOT material things. A little is still enough when you have your family. The excuse of giving the child what the mom can't is not just. Children don't need fancy clothes, private schools, vacations, or homes with swimming pools. They need their REAL mom, even if there is no father. Wanting to continue on with University life and maintain the family reputation is selfish. Selflessness is making self sacrifice and being proud of, not embarrassed by a baby........ Kitten's Mom
Yeah no.
Is it convenience or responsibility? Sometimes if you don’t have support it’s not ideal to raise a child in an environment that is chaotic and out of order. It took two people to make a baby. Babies don’t stay babies forever. They grow up and when they do that partnership and support system established from when they are a baby is vital.
How does open adoption help the birth mother before, during, and after the process of giving her child up ?
Should open adoption be encourage for every birth mother?
do adoptive parents support the birth mother when going different stages of grief ?
For me, as a birthmom who did open adoption, it means that 15yrs ago I got to pick out amazing parents for my baby. After all these years, even though I don't see her in person (by choice and for various reasons) I know she is well cared for and happy. She knows where and how to find me, I know how she is in general. It's peace of mind. How many kids get handpicked parents?
It's NOT easy, but it was the best decision for everyone. And I mean everyone. Birthfather knows too.
All stories like this have something in common... No dad..
A little bit of Paradis (here on TH-cam) has a lovely adoption story that involves the father who is still with the birth mother. They simply were not able to parent another child at that point in their life and placed their baby girl with his sister and her husband.
She never told the dad she was pregnant. Her fault
Kristin Gallo he obviously knew because everyone at her & his college knew... plus it was all over social media.
He must of known
Adoption is always the answer.
Very inspiring story and thank God you chose to give your baby life over abortion and was selfless enough to place baby with a loving family. but I've noticed with adoptions it seems dad isn't involved? did he know u was pregnant... sometimes dad's family can keep the baby at least it's raised close by the parent. I had a baby 2 years ago, her dad didn't want nothing to do with her infact he asked me many times to abort. I was stuck but thankfully had my mother who stuck by me and helped me so much. despite all the struggles I go through with her I wouldn't change it for the world. money isn't everything or opportunities. God places these babies in us for a reason! and at the right time no baby is a mistake or just don't have sex before marriage or use contraception if you don't want kids especially that young. money, materials etc aren't what children need but a mothers love is what they mostly need. that can come later even in 3 yrs or so with patience and hard work. but we all know what's best for ourselves and I truly hope you're happy with your open adoption. I've seen kids resent the birth mum even hate regardless of being kind of around in an open adoption. I gave birth 2 months after you so thought I would comment. you're very brave for what you did either way and hope goes well
I hope the birth father gave his consent for the adoption?
She was perfectly capable of raising that child. if she wasn't so brainwashed by her parents she might of actually given it a try.
That's speculation. You don't know that at all. Respect her knowledge and experience and decisions.
Just a trip to the baby store.
The music is very annoying!
Melissa why did you choose adoption and not abortion?
Isn't that her business?
I love these documented stories as it gives me hope my husband and I will be chosen soon 💜 we live in Missouri, we're going through Angel Adoption. If you are a birth mother in need of a loving family, please view the Kaat family through Angel Adoption 💜 www.angeladoptioninc.com/adoption-family/profile/jeremy-jes/
Why would a sane person give thier innocent baby away to strangers
Good parents want what's best for their kid, wouldn't you agree? Even if that means giving them up.
Think of the story of King Solomon saying he'd cut the baby in half. The real mother preferred to give up the baby.
Caring IS part of sanity. It's still love.
Porque no paran de hablar es desesperante no
I just couldn't stop crying watching this . Why are some men so heartless. Why tell an innocent girl that you can't continue the relationship unless they have sex with you and when you plant your seed how can you just go like that.???
Only sick men take advantage of women's vulnerabilities. A gentleman will never do that to a woman or his child.
And I was even mad at her when she mentioned her adoption plan. But seeing how it ended up, it seems she got lucky. May be God, the Universe, whatever, knows that she is innocent. Lol last statement sounds childish.
Nope. I could never give up a child of mine. Sorry..not sorry.
I really think the father should have been told ..you didn't make that baby by yourself maybe you couldn't be. Bothered to raise your baby but he deserved to know he made a child. I don't know how on earth anybody could give their baby away ??? I'd give my kidney up before my baby.
Well, this is why women choose abortion. They get criticized no matter what they do. She did what she felt she could handle, feel free to make your own choices. Lucky for you no one is standing there judging yours.
@@mentak2593exactly. That’s why knowing yourself is so incredibly important. People criticize and fear what they don’t understand.
Purity culture is so dangerous 😢 normal human behavior is what it is and you can’t change that fact so the shame young people are saddled with is so wrong why? Because these kids fail for just being a normal human being? Is waiting for marriage ideal? Obviously yes but it’s not the only way thankfully her parents were supportive of her unfortunately not all girls are as lucky as she is we have to change the narrative 😢
b
birth mother sounds so immature and her parents look like they usually tell her what to do.
I'm not seeing enough of owning the sexual irresponsibility aspect. Of this. It's not a mistake because I love my daughter" nonsense! go visit a prison , interview them on their parents. The night of conception you could've caught a disease. Having unwed younger parents , I know the practice needs to end
Beautiful