Why It Sucked to Be a Pirate

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 24 ส.ค. 2016
  • Yar Har fiddle dee dee, bein a pirate just blows dick to me
    Intro and outro song:
    "Brandenburg Concerto No. 4 in G, Movement I (Allegro), BWV 1049" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
    Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License
    creativecommons.org/licenses/b...

ความคิดเห็น • 12K

  • @beanybushjr.7021
    @beanybushjr.7021 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5011

    Reasons not to be a pirate:
    1: *Death.*

    • @mr.context3872
      @mr.context3872 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      @Super Ruler no no no, rotten dick jungles were worse

    • @TheHolyCheese75
      @TheHolyCheese75 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      That's actually a good reason to become a pirate

    • @GunslingerLv
      @GunslingerLv 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Only reason I need to become pirate

    • @hyde3155
      @hyde3155 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      wym thats the best part

    • @beanybushjr.7021
      @beanybushjr.7021 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      About half this comment section is r/cursed comments.

  • @dunkienugg8792
    @dunkienugg8792 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12345

    "But here's a few honorable mentions"
    *eyes immediately drop to D i c k R o t*

    • @DISTurbedwaffle918
      @DISTurbedwaffle918 4 ปีที่แล้ว +831

      *J u n g l e D i c k R o t*

    • @nelly5954
      @nelly5954 4 ปีที่แล้ว +638

      @@DISTurbedwaffle918 *R o t t e n D i c k J u n g l e s*

    • @mrkiky
      @mrkiky 4 ปีที่แล้ว +247

      Yea it's really the Rotten Dick Jungles that get you....

    • @hightechhamza2006
      @hightechhamza2006 4 ปีที่แล้ว +183

      Dick sniffles

    • @Seth-cn3xy
      @Seth-cn3xy 4 ปีที่แล้ว +220

      *D I C K S NU F F L E S*

  • @jacobgonzalez1386
    @jacobgonzalez1386 ปีที่แล้ว +2980

    Being fair to old Jack Sparrow, all his flips and rope swings are exclusively to run away from the pirates who are hacking the side characters to bits and pieces.

    • @walrusArmageddon
      @walrusArmageddon ปีที่แล้ว +151

      The crew at the beginning of a Pirates movie is always larger than the crew at the end. I think like, what, 6 or 7 people are left at the end of the second one?

    • @bigben9492
      @bigben9492 ปีที่แล้ว +98

      To be fair, jack knew how to fight with a sword, and so did most of his crew. To be extra fair, pirates irl weren't just dumbasses with sharp objects, they knew how to use said objects to a good degree. Now as for the shot being wasted on a deck hand if it was even able to shoot at the time, not sure.

    • @NigerianCrusader
      @NigerianCrusader 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      @@walrusArmageddonINCLUDING TODD HOWARD

    • @NigerianCrusader
      @NigerianCrusader 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@bigben9492STOP IGNORING ME

    • @Lrizu
      @Lrizu 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      ​@@NigerianCrusaderuh nuh uhhhhh

  • @pon8255
    @pon8255 ปีที่แล้ว +838

    fun fact: pirates didnt just drink budweiser by the gallon because they loved getting drunk but because the way beer was fermented at the time the consistency was closer to a very watery bread dough that had some alcohol in it so it was actually very filling as well as stimulating which is why depictions of beer at the time was very foamy. they really drank it cus it was just sterile and almost food, getting drunk was just a plus

    • @NigerianCrusader
      @NigerianCrusader 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +15

      WHATS BUDWEISER MATEY

    • @Icybeqnz
      @Icybeqnz 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      @@NigerianCrusaderpirate prison beer lol

    • @njinlover
      @njinlover 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +23

      I read they also drank beer because they didn't have enough clean water, which makes sense

    • @Ignatiusussy
      @Ignatiusussy 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +23

      @@njinlover I imagine it probably went something like this: "Water is cheap, but beer is also cheap, filling (the beer of those times was very thick), and gets us drunk, so lets just get the beer."

    • @anthonygerace8926
      @anthonygerace8926 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      @@njinlover Most people on land drank alcohol for the same reason.

  • @brieblevins66
    @brieblevins66 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6187

    sir that's my emotional support weevil

    • @ttracs
      @ttracs 5 ปีที่แล้ว +80

      ultrabrie ma’am that is my guide flee

    • @johnmemes6447
      @johnmemes6447 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Weevil

    • @unlawfulspinach5435
      @unlawfulspinach5435 5 ปีที่แล้ว +77

      Sir that's my emotional support diseased rat

    • @amiehalfacre1691
      @amiehalfacre1691 5 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      do not eat mr weevil or kill mr rat

    • @tf2oshaaa
      @tf2oshaaa 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Blevins

  • @bingbongjoel6581
    @bingbongjoel6581 5 ปีที่แล้ว +25522

    I thought pirates ate chicken, fish and apples. Cus that’s always what pirate Lego sets included.

    • @MrSage0011
      @MrSage0011 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1400

      I thought they have an orange tree in the ship
      And a very good cock with yellow hair

    • @Armadurapersonal
      @Armadurapersonal 5 ปีที่แล้ว +185

      Cute avatar dude

    • @ridiculicious
      @ridiculicious 5 ปีที่แล้ว +361

      @@MrSage0011 "cock"-!
      *...Well, I mean, you're not wrong.

    • @MrSage0011
      @MrSage0011 5 ปีที่แล้ว +225

      @@ridiculiciousshit I wrote that??

    • @destiny_9533
      @destiny_9533 5 ปีที่แล้ว +122

      I thought they fished or didn't even need to eat

  • @karelklos5483
    @karelklos5483 ปีที่แล้ว +575

    Fun fact: Navy Soldiers actually got scurvy significantly more often then Pirates because the rum drinks they made often contained limes or other citrus

    • @Cha0tic_G00d
      @Cha0tic_G00d ปีที่แล้ว +15

      That's weird, because Sam said you get scurvy from vitamin c deficiency while citrus are a source of vitamin c

    • @karelklos5483
      @karelklos5483 ปีที่แล้ว +123

      @@Cha0tic_G00d yeah, the pirates made rum drinks with citrus while the Navy did not, so the Navy got scurvy more frequently

    • @pressftopayrespects6325
      @pressftopayrespects6325 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Navy sailors*
      Small nitpick but is one of my pet peeves anyway.

    • @karelklos5483
      @karelklos5483 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@pressftopayrespects6325 well thank god you took time out of ur day to correct ME over one of YOUR pet peeves.

    • @pressftopayrespects6325
      @pressftopayrespects6325 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      @@karelklos5483 No need to be harsh partner, just putting it out there that soldiers aren’t in any other military branches than the army.

  • @tjm11015
    @tjm11015 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +257

    My favorite pirate was Black Bart Roberts. He was literally captured by pirates ☠, was forced to join the crew because he was a navigator, then when the captain died he was voted in as captain. Then he said, oh fck it, a short and merry life we will have. Then went on to have a suicidal charge across the sea, and is BY FAR the most successful pirate in the Atlantic. He captured over 400 vessels, to put that into comparison, black beard captured 30. And he died straddling a cannon while the rest of his crew were drunk and afraid. Man was a fckn MAD LAD!

    • @victorlolxd7347
      @victorlolxd7347 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Mine is Santas brother from elf bowling

    • @selg865
      @selg865 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      What about Calico Jack and Charles Vane

    • @tjm11015
      @tjm11015 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@selg865 Fck John Rackham, I preferred his wife Bonnie to be honest.
      Vane was not nearly as successful as Black Bart Roberts, but he did get some cred with his last words when they hung him, "Get on with it motherfckrs".

  • @thatissuperfunny5358
    @thatissuperfunny5358 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10891

    Schrodinger's Hardtack: if you eat it in the dark, the hardtack is simultaneously infested and not infested with weevils.

  • @masonlunde3054
    @masonlunde3054 5 ปีที่แล้ว +15428

    Can't spell disease without sea

  • @micahphilson
    @micahphilson ปีที่แล้ว +584

    He's not entirely right about the salt pork or beef. They would almost always soak or boil the meat to extract most of the salt out of it and soften it up a bit before cooking with it.
    Same with the hardtack, they rarely ate it straight as rock-hard bread, they'd typically cook it into a stew or at least dip it in water or grog.

    • @NigerianCrusader
      @NigerianCrusader 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      TODD HOWARD DOESNT

    • @jonathanherrera9956
      @jonathanherrera9956 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

      Water from where? You are describing it as if they had plenty of non-salty water aboard a ship; probably what you say could apply to on land food, but hardly on a ship that aims to spend weeks or months in the sea. Water is way too precious to be wasted cooking.

    • @grantflippin7808
      @grantflippin7808 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +45

      ​@@jonathanherrera9956 if the ship is low on water, you don't touch the salt pork, because it would make the crew thirsty and deplete the remaining barrels of water

    • @smithsmith6402
      @smithsmith6402 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +32

      @@jonathanherrera9956 Pirates don't need to spend months at sea. That's for merchants trying to cross oceans. Pirates can hang out near coastlines and refill their water often enough to be way less of an issue, and carrying excess water around to make the ship seem like a heavy, slow, harmless merchant ship was a good idea anyways. Being a pirate might have sucked, but it certainly wasn't nearly as bad as being in a legitimate navy.

    • @Hazel-hn2dt
      @Hazel-hn2dt 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      How do you start a fire on a wooden ship? If they were going to cook you needed fire…

  • @SomeGuy-gc8zs
    @SomeGuy-gc8zs ปีที่แล้ว +132

    After a certain point, many pirates had a TON of formal training, because they were largely comprised of deserters from various professional navies.

    • @archwaldo
      @archwaldo ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Weren't they war veterans? Iirc one of the reasons for the age of piracy was the lack of demand and excess of supply for soldiers. They had no more jobs and got all of these military equipment lying around, so...

    • @jarnodatema
      @jarnodatema 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Well If I were press hanged into service, I’d be like “fuck it” too. The goal would be to climb the ranks in the navy as fast as possible or turn pirate, pillage as much booty in as short time as possible and then retire before I’m killed

  • @MaxJDF
    @MaxJDF 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9010

    I like how little Jimmy's voice is deeper than Sammy's

  • @yeet2787
    @yeet2787 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12960

    You forgot about the fact that a pirate would carry around 5 or more pistols because the second they got wet they wouldn't fire so they would just keep drawing pistols until one fired

    • @Alizudo
      @Alizudo 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1653

      Also they took forever to reload so again it's just easier to grab another one and reload it after the fight is over.

    • @ShiftdoesViolentRape
      @ShiftdoesViolentRape 5 ปีที่แล้ว +976

      They did Reaper Reload™ before it was cool.

    • @Alizudo
      @Alizudo 5 ปีที่แล้ว +524

      @@ShiftdoesViolentRape
      Which is another reason why Reaper goes so well with a pirate skin

    • @Burn_Angel
      @Burn_Angel 4 ปีที่แล้ว +340

      They weren't the first to do that. From what I know, dutch cavalry invented that strategy.
      Well, if you can call that a strategy.

    • @hellatze
      @hellatze 4 ปีที่แล้ว +132

      @@Burn_Angel its a common sense lol.

  • @jasonhansen8035
    @jasonhansen8035 ปีที่แล้ว +146

    Bros just lying so he can become king of the pirates

  • @CazCraven
    @CazCraven ปีที่แล้ว +82

    In pirate combat the cannon balls would hit the ship mostly and create a huge wave of splinters. Being hit by the splinters would cause many of the pirates to lose body parts or they would even die. This is what formed the stereotypical image of eyepatches, hooks and peg legs for pirates.

    • @BlockImmigrants
      @BlockImmigrants 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      And the battles are probably quick as hell with many deaths within the first few minutes of fighting.

    • @wujek7616
      @wujek7616 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      @@BlockImmigrants these battles could take hours or even days. Even though splinters were indeed very dangerous for the crew, the ship took barely any damage at all. "like throwing a biscuit" -Francois Massertie 1689

    • @tristo4197
      @tristo4197 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@wujek7616who is francois massertie

  • @pranav5273
    @pranav5273 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5257

    2100 kids making videos on "Why it sucked to be a Software Developer"

    • @Siegward37
      @Siegward37 3 ปีที่แล้ว +137

      It really sucks actually...

    • @arcle3853
      @arcle3853 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Anyone care to elaborate?

    • @user-sp2yl8gw5c
      @user-sp2yl8gw5c 3 ปีที่แล้ว +45

      @@arcle3853 in short, they didn't have many choices

    • @kevinlewis8420
      @kevinlewis8420 3 ปีที่แล้ว +71

      If you like coding and work for a decent company, it's a lot of fun.

    • @legendarytat8278
      @legendarytat8278 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      @@kevinlewis8420 Which is not easy.

  • @Zeph0
    @Zeph0 3 ปีที่แล้ว +32216

    Noticed that "sucked" is past tense and being a pirate today is actually amazing don't listen to him

    • @auhsojacosta1672
      @auhsojacosta1672 3 ปีที่แล้ว +829

      Free terraria

    • @mikijunior5339
      @mikijunior5339 3 ปีที่แล้ว +935

      Arrr
      Crunchyroll is blocked in my country

    • @DanielGarcia-kw4ep
      @DanielGarcia-kw4ep 3 ปีที่แล้ว +102

      Go to Somalia then

    • @swoluigi3828
      @swoluigi3828 3 ปีที่แล้ว +121

      @@iamnotafederalagent5552 thats not even correct IP formatting

    • @EpicVideoGamer7771
      @EpicVideoGamer7771 3 ปีที่แล้ว +171

      free one piece with no ads :D

  • @coyburrows370
    @coyburrows370 ปีที่แล้ว +494

    Wealth, fame, power. The world had it all won by one man: the Pirate King, Gold Roger. At his death, the words he spoke drove countless men out to sea.

    • @caelanbold3776
      @caelanbold3776 ปีที่แล้ว +78

      “You want my treasure, you can have it!, I left everything I gathered together in one place. now, you just have to find it”

    • @venusaurmega003
      @venusaurmega003 ปีที่แล้ว +57

      “And so, men set off to the Grand Line in pursuit of their dreams. The world has truly entered the Great Pirate Era!”
      Sorry if I misremembered anything, I tried quoting it from memory

    • @jeffvalenciano1068
      @jeffvalenciano1068 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I miss Sam's videos :(

    • @apersoniguess_
      @apersoniguess_ ปีที่แล้ว +16

      the one piece, the one piece is real

    • @insertusernamehere8125
      @insertusernamehere8125 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      "YOU WANT MY TREASURE? FIND IT! I'VE LEFT IT ALL IN ONE PLACE!!!"

  • @jamesburk8145
    @jamesburk8145 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    Not to mention that later in the "golden age of priracy" you could only land at a few select ports (which were far and few between) because if you went to the wrong one (which was most of them) you'd just be hanged on the spot.
    A lot of pirates started out as privateers who were basically civilian sailors like fishermen or merchants specifically contracted by the Crown to raid Spanish vessels until England made them illegal after a truce of sorts was struck with Spain. But a lot didn't get the memo or just wanted to keep raiding because they liked how they could make money in looting the other ships, plus they could resupply stealing the others food and water etc. Eventually gaining infamy also became a draw because it made it easier to get the other ship to surrender rather than have to fight them if the others knew who you were and what you would do. The origins of that kind of piracy is super interesting.

    • @greywolf7577
      @greywolf7577 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      How would the ports know who was a pirate and who wasn't?

    • @johnnywakeup5515
      @johnnywakeup5515 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      They had stuff like passwords and records of known vetted captains, and if you weren't in the know, you were probably a pirate.

  • @theJellyjoker
    @theJellyjoker 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1420

    When choosing which piece of weevil infested hardtack, always choose the lesser of two weevils.

    • @joshthecomputertech
      @joshthecomputertech 7 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      THIS.

    • @martincullen438
      @martincullen438 7 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Weevil is weevil, lesser, greater, middling - makes no difference. The degree is arbitrary, the definition blurred. If I'm to choose between one weevil and another, I'd rather not choose at all.

    • @wonder_9315
      @wonder_9315 7 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Master and commander

    • @rancidhotdogwater1658
      @rancidhotdogwater1658 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Martin Cullen is that a geralt i smell

    • @devonlinden6041
      @devonlinden6041 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Jeffery Liggett you are a god.

  • @parkouremaster
    @parkouremaster 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27646

    Being a pirate, is basically being a homeless but in the sea

    • @studentNEET319
      @studentNEET319 3 ปีที่แล้ว +45

      @@Chichichihuahua wrong time

    • @user-bu6dg2li9r
      @user-bu6dg2li9r 3 ปีที่แล้ว +197

      Aye, the ship is ‘yer home once ‘ye learn the ways of the pirate

    • @DrsJacksonn
      @DrsJacksonn 3 ปีที่แล้ว +207

      + all the disadvantages of being a slave + all the disadvantages of being in prison, but each of those x10.

    • @piretiris8223
      @piretiris8223 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Sea robbers

    • @DarethLover67
      @DarethLover67 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      oh dang

  • @gingerhoof2157
    @gingerhoof2157 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    I actually really loved hardtacks when I was a kid. Something about those crunchy plain and hardly salty bread squares spoke to my soul

    • @junismith1791
      @junismith1791 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      it’s still a thing???

    • @gingerhoof2157
      @gingerhoof2157 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@junismith1791 yeah just bought a pack of hardtacks the other day

    • @thepeopleonthecouch2928
      @thepeopleonthecouch2928 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@junismith1791yeah, though they're packaged to be smaller squares, not huge ones.

    • @junismith1791
      @junismith1791 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@thepeopleonthecouch2928 i can’t imagine the appeal to keep them around this long

    • @Dexuz
      @Dexuz 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I like them too, in my country they sell both salty and saltless ones, which we call "galletas de agua", and I eat them as recurrent snacks; many people think I'm crazy.

  • @timothytosser288
    @timothytosser288 ปีที่แล้ว +65

    0:27 histrorically pirates did that 💀

    • @Lumppii.
      @Lumppii. ปีที่แล้ว +4

      How do you know?

    • @Cheeser_
      @Cheeser_ ปีที่แล้ว +30

      Personal experience

    • @rE8Al
      @rE8Al ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Cheeser_🤨

    • @tangytango2749
      @tangytango2749 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      No actually. Homosexuality in piracy was no more frequent in piracy than it was throughout any point in history. Most pirates were religious, and as such, beat on anyone who participated in such acts.

    • @edude9
      @edude9 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@tangytango2749lets go!

  • @redrix1787
    @redrix1787 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5244

    It cracks me up how Sam's sense of humor hasn't changed in years.

    • @beulahjohnson2757
      @beulahjohnson2757 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Same 🤣

    • @bloodakoos
      @bloodakoos 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      it was humor?

    • @bentennyson2615
      @bentennyson2615 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Alguien De Internet no it was drama-._-.

    • @VCRK888
      @VCRK888 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Alguien De Internet yes

    • @mud2479
      @mud2479 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Who is sam?

  • @teagant.v3677
    @teagant.v3677 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6041

    the first stages of scurvey sounds like a guy going through puberty

    • @milesarroyo8404
      @milesarroyo8404 5 ปีที่แล้ว +576

      Teagan T.V oh yea I remember being 13 and bleeding from my gums and losing a couple of teeth ‘twas good times

    • @godofguns2434
      @godofguns2434 5 ปีที่แล้ว +284

      Dying though, that sucked ass.

    • @whyamihere4269
      @whyamihere4269 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @Eric Lee ?

    • @whyamihere4269
      @whyamihere4269 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @Eric Lee Uh ok then nvm

    • @user-gx8fw8qr6d
      @user-gx8fw8qr6d 5 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      Miles Arroyo I’m 13 and that’s happening to me right now I just lost another tooth 😔

  • @youtxbe_r8191
    @youtxbe_r8191 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    that's not gonna stop me from becoming thE KING OF THE PIRATES

  • @hfhxgdytfyguyghfyfhrbt6gxc749
    @hfhxgdytfyguyghfyfhrbt6gxc749 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    1:32
    "Oh, you're gluten-free? Sorry, all we have is gluten!"
    -B. Dylan Hollis

  • @traskforge
    @traskforge 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5037

    "Why it Sucked to be a Pirate"
    me, who has the entire SpongeBob SquarePants movie illegally download: It's actually not that bad

    • @Jartran72
      @Jartran72 3 ปีที่แล้ว +51

      I am sure the pirates did a lot of sucking though. Seeing as they were real close with eatch other :)

    • @trap5449
      @trap5449 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Which one?

    • @TryPuttingItInRice
      @TryPuttingItInRice 3 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      @@trap5449 the good one

    • @camygael
      @camygael 3 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      *YOU WOULDN'T STEAL A CAR*

    • @Pyraticalpunk
      @Pyraticalpunk 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      @@camygael YOU WOULDN'T STEAL A SHIP

  • @pugfugly1989
    @pugfugly1989 5 ปีที่แล้ว +15035

    Alcoholism was a method of survival, because liquor was always safe to drink

    • @Puckosar
      @Puckosar 5 ปีที่แล้ว +739

      You don't need much alcohol to keep water safe though. The drinking water was most likely very weakly alcoholic, like a very light beer.

    • @pugfugly1989
      @pugfugly1989 5 ปีที่แล้ว +348

      @@Puckosar No, you straight up need hard liquors 40% or harder for it to be sterile.

    • @SimplifiedFinanceSiFi
      @SimplifiedFinanceSiFi 5 ปีที่แล้ว +544

      @@pugfugly1989 40% and hard liquor? you better make the full hundred, pussy

    • @Vortex-zb6be
      @Vortex-zb6be 5 ปีที่แล้ว +479

      Simplified Crypto STRAIGHT ETHANOL BITCH

    • @RyuichiNoGekido
      @RyuichiNoGekido 5 ปีที่แล้ว +86

      Too true m8... wait, you meant on a microbial level... not an... emotional... ummm.

  • @Salad-in
    @Salad-in ปีที่แล้ว +10

    > Dick Rot
    > Jungle Dick Rot
    A fan of the choices, Pirates are.

  • @williamfalck4882
    @williamfalck4882 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    A lot of this is true but ona lot of ships you had hammocks which the crew slept in, a lot more ration than just spirits and hardtack and yes, drinkable water was not something you just had on the ship. However, some ships had a "kitchen" oven with a built in boiler which you could boil Sea water in to get clean and drinkable water and despite being pirates, theft on land happened all the time.

    • @greywolf7577
      @greywolf7577 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      If you boiled sea water, you'd have to evaporate it and then have it condense in another container in order to get the salt out. I'm not sure if ships at the time had that type of ability.

  • @PolythenePam0451
    @PolythenePam0451 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3345

    "I might be disturbed, but that's one sickness I could definitely get down with"
    Nice

    • @SealiioNahka
      @SealiioNahka 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I mean... sake and vodka are ok.

    • @VCRK888
      @VCRK888 5 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      The Film Freaks Holy shit i just got it

    • @aji_jacobson
      @aji_jacobson 5 ปีที่แล้ว +54

      @@SealiioNahka Disturbed is a band and they have a (great) sing titled: Down With the Sickness

    • @abdallanassar9124
      @abdallanassar9124 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Ahahahahah omg i just got it

    • @shanag.2852
      @shanag.2852 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Omg yes

  • @zoomer5700
    @zoomer5700 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1801

    "why it sucked to be a pirate" coming from a guy who doesn't have a cool ass hook hand

    • @heyimlithuanian1003
      @heyimlithuanian1003 3 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      was worth it, cut off my hand and replaced it with a clothes hanger

    • @Jonvongagglejack
      @Jonvongagglejack 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@heyimlithuanian1003 yar har jar ?

    • @BisexualPlagueDoctor
      @BisexualPlagueDoctor 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Imagine trying to reload a flintlock without two hands, or holding anything… sure you can go standby standby and hold big boxes but that’s kinda the only thing more you can do with a hook the without a hand

    • @ImperialRonod
      @ImperialRonod 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@komorebi3555 I have two hook hands. It's pretty great. Thinking of hook feet next.

    • @rift7609
      @rift7609 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@ImperialRonod After: Looks at knive, looks at hook on the table, then replaces head with a ho- *BOW DOWN TO ME MORTALS*

  • @alang.bandala8863
    @alang.bandala8863 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    Fun fact: The character of Jack Sparrow was conceived with at least three different illnesses on him, ranging from heat stroke to a curious little red spot that grows on the side of his lip with each movie. So yes, he is a lucky guy, but he already spent it on something else.

  • @kontrast4361
    @kontrast4361 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Once again I'm rewatching this beautiful collection of videos by Sam and I want more...I need more 😂

  • @ddootzles
    @ddootzles 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2953

    Don't forget that people still think pirates don't exist anymore. My friend was convinced pirates were a thing of the 1700s

    • @rubylicious977
      @rubylicious977 3 ปีที่แล้ว +462

      Dudes just got modernised

    • @Nope-en9bo
      @Nope-en9bo 3 ปีที่แล้ว +556

      Tell your friend to drift a ride around Somalia.

    • @bricks99
      @bricks99 3 ปีที่แล้ว +244

      I know a kid who doesn't think pirates exist. Just as mythical as unicorns to her.

    • @bogi2557
      @bogi2557 3 ปีที่แล้ว +162

      Yeah, but they don’t really live like this anymore

    • @kennethbryant5819
      @kennethbryant5819 3 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      Missed Captain Phillips did he? They have guns now.

  • @MugiwaraShay
    @MugiwaraShay 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5375

    so what you’re telling me is there are no rubber people talking skeletons and raccoon dogs? yeah no thanks

    • @nightlymoss1361
      @nightlymoss1361 3 ปีที่แล้ว +339

      No hot navigators either😔

    • @codycody6634
      @codycody6634 3 ปีที่แล้ว +311

      No swordsman who have no sense of direction?

    • @nightlymoss1361
      @nightlymoss1361 3 ปีที่แล้ว +214

      @@codycody6634 no more taekwondo chefs

    • @lucascerri3847
      @lucascerri3847 3 ปีที่แล้ว +156

      No liars? Oh wait.....

    • @chrise76776
      @chrise76776 3 ปีที่แล้ว +195

      If there’s no perverted cyborgs who constantly break into a dance routine, I don’t want to be a pirate

  • @Coeus9048
    @Coeus9048 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    One Piece lied to me

  • @almightylordpitlepen8608
    @almightylordpitlepen8608 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4309

    That won’t stop me from being king of the pirates

    • @gildeddrake1479
      @gildeddrake1479 3 ปีที่แล้ว +46

      the salesman saying he'll run the prison

    • @deanrobson6904
      @deanrobson6904 3 ปีที่แล้ว +175

      Not if I get the one piece first

    • @almightylordpitlepen8608
      @almightylordpitlepen8608 3 ปีที่แล้ว +57

      @@deanrobson6904 in your dreams

    • @t6hp
      @t6hp 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      EHM, it's the pirate king. Not King of, more like a king upon. In other words, become the baddest ass there is that everyone would simply shit themselves just thinking about dueling you, including the government.
      Kind of like Kim Jong-un.

    • @mukelu
      @mukelu 3 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      I am the pirate king, i've pirated many movies and games

  • @perfi4333
    @perfi4333 ปีที่แล้ว +7189

    I am an “I’m not paying for Adobe softwares” pirate.

    • @zhanucong4614
      @zhanucong4614 ปีที่แล้ว +136

      Actually adobe dosent want you to pay,you learning adobe and maybe start working in industry gives them more profit,that tactic is so effective that in anime industry they are called industry standart

    • @gavinwilson5324
      @gavinwilson5324 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      @@zhanucong4614 Then why is it so damn expensive?

    • @zhanucong4614
      @zhanucong4614 ปีที่แล้ว +62

      @@gavinwilson5324 so that company has to pay big sums while newcomer's gett attached trough piracy

    • @liliththefirehawk796
      @liliththefirehawk796 ปีที่แล้ว +112

      @@zhanucong4614 “adobe doesnt want you to pay” **adobe creative cloud costs $600**

    • @wilh3lmmusic
      @wilh3lmmusic ปีที่แล้ว +8

      BASED

  • @terribleexampleofacat
    @terribleexampleofacat 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    1:23 Weevils are also a problem in Guyana. Coincidentally, so are pirates.

  • @MesozoicMaiden
    @MesozoicMaiden ปีที่แล้ว +33

    As a new pirates of the caribbean fan, here's the best part we're all ignoring.
    If you wanted to, you could get some shovels, metal detectors & snack cooler, Gather your friends, dress in matching bandannas, go to the beach in a rowboat and try to find fossils or stuff in the sand with the detector while singing sea shanties. You might not have a black pearl or Flying Dutchman, but it'll be fun! And no one can stop you!

    • @a.c.forever5157
      @a.c.forever5157 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      This just sounds pathetic and sad.

    • @caitlinlujan1655
      @caitlinlujan1655 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Sounds like a blast. I'm in!

    • @greywolf7577
      @greywolf7577 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Fossils wouldn't go off due to a metal detector since they aren't made of metal. You might find some coins, though. Be sure you are on a public beach since the authorities might not take so kindly to it if you choose a private one.

    • @BlockImmigrants
      @BlockImmigrants 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@a.c.forever5157You don’t need to have your limbs torn off in the middle of nowhere to have some fun.

    • @a.c.forever5157
      @a.c.forever5157 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@BlockImmigrants you don’t need to RP as some degen pirate to have fun either.

  • @federalcasemaker
    @federalcasemaker 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9740

    Fun fact: pirates don't even find treasure, they rob ships

    • @euboean3079
      @euboean3079 3 ปีที่แล้ว +570

      I thought they buried loot they found from ships and towns that they raided so they could go loot more and sometimes pirates would return to those sites that were buried to collect the booty.

    • @viridiantheforest1037
      @viridiantheforest1037 3 ปีที่แล้ว +289

      @@euboean3079and also probably steal loot some other pirate buried

    • @TahtahmesDiary
      @TahtahmesDiary 3 ปีที่แล้ว +238

      Finding treasure comes when you're trying to steal someone else's loot! Were you not paying attention in pirate school?!

    • @rachdarastrix5251
      @rachdarastrix5251 3 ปีที่แล้ว +120

      Funny enough most pirates did not burry treasure. They went to the bank.

    • @o.l4890
      @o.l4890 3 ปีที่แล้ว +114

      Actually archeologists haven't found any pirate treasure till today
      It's mostly a stereotypes based on the book "Treasure Island" by Robert louis Stevenson who also drew the famous treasure map with his father.
      Because if the book was real ,we all know the boi won't survive an hour with any of these crewmates

  • @mecoder9910
    @mecoder9910 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7340

    Edited Fun fact: Pirates made grog because the lime in it has vitamin c a vitamin that helps prevent scurvy a not so fun disease. They could have just brought a bunch of limes on ship but the fruit would have gone bad in a few days and putting lime juice in their watery diluted alcohol made it last a lot longer, taste a bit better and helped prevent scurvy. Also pirates are people too.
    Edit: Thank you for the likes and pointing out everything historically inaccurate with my comment. And if there are any other historical inaccuracies please mention them.

    • @xquo2714
      @xquo2714 3 ปีที่แล้ว +335

      @Bryce citrus gives the proper nutrients

    • @Clayton-Bigsby966
      @Clayton-Bigsby966 3 ปีที่แล้ว +78

      People and pirates?lol

    • @xquo2714
      @xquo2714 3 ปีที่แล้ว +159

      @Bryce still not nearly as bad as if they had scurvy

    • @trapadvisor
      @trapadvisor 3 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      @Bryce why are you lecturing like all the people reading this are pirates. Also I don’t think they would’ve cared about the quality of their teeth and who tf drinks tap water I’ve been poor but I’ve never sunk that low

    • @livesakimbo
      @livesakimbo 3 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      @Bryce they were talking about pirates

  • @AnthonyCram
    @AnthonyCram ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Glad to see he’s back

  • @maizjsj
    @maizjsj ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Got this in my recommended again. Now that Sam is back, I might as well!

  • @OjiSensei
    @OjiSensei 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3811

    Don’t ruin my dreams of becoming Pirate King.

    • @marin4442
      @marin4442 3 ปีที่แล้ว +102

      Lol u can’t cuz luffy will be pirate king

    • @OjiSensei
      @OjiSensei 3 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      @@marin4442 I’m joyboy wdym lol

    • @guyinarobe228
      @guyinarobe228 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I think I'm fine with just being a lord personally.

    • @axelpepen2642
      @axelpepen2642 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      I Will be The sniper in your ship.

    • @guyinarobe228
      @guyinarobe228 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@axelpepen2642 good luck finding an accurate rifle

  • @CommanderCrocky
    @CommanderCrocky 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3409

    You forgot the part where you get killed by a kraken after raiding a skeleton fort

    • @synphilia4776
      @synphilia4776 4 ปีที่แล้ว +50

      Sea of thieves reference

    • @urbs7466
      @urbs7466 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Best comment

    • @fumothfan9
      @fumothfan9 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      TF2 reference?

    • @ethanhockley3136
      @ethanhockley3136 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@fumothfan9 it's sea of theives

    • @whyme3917
      @whyme3917 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      I read this as: you got killed by a "Karen" which was wired cus I thought Karen's just complained and not killed anyone.

  • @onlyremedy29
    @onlyremedy29 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I genuinely lol while I watch your videos. My only wish is that the were longer.
    My good friend, keep up the good work 👏🏾✨

  • @Fezezen
    @Fezezen 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +23

    This video basically describes what it was like to be a sailor in general. Pirates were willing to do all of this because they could make a ton of money, whereas normal sailors made basically no money.
    Also most pirate ships operated on democracy rather than the typical navy hierarchy and harsh punishment

  • @knko7158
    @knko7158 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2203

    I was not convinced until I saw “Dick Rot” disease. Ok I don’t want to be a pirate anymore..

    • @KinglyOle
      @KinglyOle 3 ปีที่แล้ว +78

      One Piece is proof that being a pirate is fun

    • @FlexBeanbag
      @FlexBeanbag 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@KinglyOle th-cam.com/video/Bmc9NFfhx74/w-d-xo.html

    • @FlexBeanbag
      @FlexBeanbag 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      th-cam.com/video/Bmc9NFfhx74/w-d-xo.html

    • @Sentient_Blob
      @Sentient_Blob 3 ปีที่แล้ว +97

      There’s an actual disease called crotch rot, which is just athletes foot but on your balls and dick. I’m pretty sure the pirates actually had to deal with it

    • @lobeliaowl2482
      @lobeliaowl2482 3 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      @@Sentient_Blob So, mother nature is into cbt?

  • @ylop1746
    @ylop1746 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5879

    dude is just trying to ruin our dreams of finding the One Piece so that he can find it for himself and become pirate king

    • @richraichu1370
      @richraichu1370 3 ปีที่แล้ว +150

      no hes with the world govt

    • @ilariaf6260
      @ilariaf6260 3 ปีที่แล้ว +145

      maybe thats why he disappeared, he's actually busy looking for the one piece rn

    • @TornadoZX825
      @TornadoZX825 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      He's not wrong, hardtack sucks and I always get the ones with weevils in them

    • @rimjhimdhusiya699
      @rimjhimdhusiya699 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      My like made your number of likes 666 * que evil laughter *

    • @richraichu1370
      @richraichu1370 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@rimjhimdhusiya699 and mine made it 667 *evil_er laughter*

  • @tigerazoz2910
    @tigerazoz2910 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    the one piece is real white beard said it him self time to be a pirate

  • @RoseGold_v1
    @RoseGold_v1 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I always love going back to this guy ❤

  • @abyssGazerTV
    @abyssGazerTV 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14948

    Implying that legal ships weren’t this shitty. Sea travel back in the day just sucked in general.

    • @tacosmexicanstyle7846
      @tacosmexicanstyle7846 3 ปีที่แล้ว +419

      Yeah I don’t think the person who made this video is really comparing like for like here. There’s a lot of presentism going on. Yes, life sucked everywhere no matter what you were doing. Legal ships were even worse than pirate ships imo because sailors had no individual rights, merely a wage but not ownership in the venture, they would also get scurvy and die in battle. They also didn’t get any say in the running of the ship. Idk in what way this video thinks it’s making its point about pirate life sucking

    • @bluntcabbage6042
      @bluntcabbage6042 3 ปีที่แล้ว +616

      Pirates moreso.
      - They would be turned away from any port that wasn't a free port.
      - They would be ruthlessly hunted by the most powerful navies on the planet.
      - Since pirate culture was lawless, said free ports were rarely safe and one always had to keep looking over their shoulder to avoid being stabbed or shot or robbed.
      Same with any life of crime, it's going to be harder than if one decided to remain within the bounds of the law.

    • @abyssGazerTV
      @abyssGazerTV 3 ปีที่แล้ว +61

      @Luck Genuine Lightning I hope you understand that the word “implying” can be used in a normal, non-greentext sentence.

    • @owenb8636
      @owenb8636 3 ปีที่แล้ว +219

      Yeah that's true but no one's exactly idolizing being a crewmate on one of his majesty's fine floating dungeons in the same way as buccaneering

    • @yetanother9127
      @yetanother9127 3 ปีที่แล้ว +128

      @@bluntcabbage6042 Law-abiding sailors weren't much better off. They could make port in more places, sure, but those places could be just as violent at times, and common sailors made even less money than pirates and thus couldn't really enjoy their shore leave anyway. (If they even _got_ shore leave; many navy sailors were conscripts known as "pressed men" who were functionally slaves and were sometimes even chained to the ship to prevent them from escaping while in port.)
      For all the violence and misery of the pirate's life, at least they made good money (relatively speaking), they generally had a say in how their ships were run, and they could usually leave whenever they wanted without being pursued. None of these were true for law-abiding sailors. For those with a high tolerance for adversity, the potential benefits of piracy could easily outweigh the downsides; it was not an easy life, certainly, but it was potentially a profitable one.
      (Also, sailors of all kinds generally got more and better food than this video implies; one surviving Royal Navy ration specifies 7 lb hardtack, 4 lb salt beef, 2 lb salt pork , 2 pt peas, 1.5 pt oatmeal, 6 oz sugar, 6 oz butter, 12 oz cheese, and 7 gal beer, _per sailor per week._ Yes, each man was issued a gallon of beer a day. Pirates generally ate a bit worse, but not by that much depending on how successful they'd been recently; much of the "booty" pirates plundered from their victims consisted of food and other supplies, rather than gold or jewels.)

  • @varietywiarrior
    @varietywiarrior 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1830

    The food mentioned was just the travel rations. If they were at sea toolong, yeah, the for sure ate like shit. But you've gotta remember that they usually ended up looting spices and stuff. It's been documented that pirates often ate better than navy sailors.

    • @youtubeenjoyer-pf3tu
      @youtubeenjoyer-pf3tu 4 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      @N5ZZ0 I...I...okay

    • @youtubeenjoyer-pf3tu
      @youtubeenjoyer-pf3tu 4 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      @N5ZZ0 here 🥫

    • @hellatze
      @hellatze 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Not every pirate are that lucky.

    • @Noah_Levy
      @Noah_Levy 4 ปีที่แล้ว +91

      Not to mention that scurvy wasn't that big a deal in the Caribbean, since the distance between islands isn't that big, and fruit is plentiful.

    • @monalisadabbing7491
      @monalisadabbing7491 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Sauce pls

  • @jornadaepica70
    @jornadaepica70 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    That disturbed down with the sicknes got you another sub mate

  • @eduardopuchalski269
    @eduardopuchalski269 ปีที่แล้ว

    I have watched this video about 100 times and I'm addicted to the hey little jimmy quote

  • @lolktoskol4744
    @lolktoskol4744 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2636

    "...pirate ships typically packed in as many crew members as possible..."
    Meanwhile, in Sea of Thieves: (4 people on a galleon is a fully operational crew)

    • @Drums_of_Liberation
      @Drums_of_Liberation 3 ปีที่แล้ว +46

      In an empty sea of an empty game no one plays of course 4 people is a fully operational crew.

    • @nachox28x28
      @nachox28x28 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      *laughs in shrouded ghost*

    • @nikitasidoryuk852
      @nikitasidoryuk852 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      @@Drums_of_Liberation this bro. Game is good but needs more action. They got to make it feel smooth like cod. Cod mw has really good movement and interface ui, whereas sea of thrives is shit bro. On controller it's so hard to aim, no aim assist and shitty ui. If they just made the combat a little bit more fucking intuitive then people would be playing it more. More people, more comp, better game. It's just not that fun to play. And all you earn are cosmetics. Oh look at me bro I'm a pirate legend. Who gives bro, game is shit

    • @inolongerusethisaccount4004
      @inolongerusethisaccount4004 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I tried playing sea of thieves it was boring no clear objective empty seas 0 players on my crew cause my friends don't even play it I dont even know what to do and I rarely find anyone

    • @brianasarmiento3425
      @brianasarmiento3425 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I read your comment as soon as he said that lone

  • @birk3947
    @birk3947 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5142

    “A man’s dream will never die”
    ~Marshall D. Teach

    • @jobliar937
      @jobliar937 3 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      fuck that guy tho for real

    • @hewhoyeet4953
      @hewhoyeet4953 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      This sounds too necrophiliac

    • @grantorino2325
      @grantorino2325 3 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      Was he related to Edward Teach (A.K.A. *Blackbeard* )?

    • @birk3947
      @birk3947 3 ปีที่แล้ว +107

      @@grantorino2325 i prefer heavily inspired

    • @aegonitargaryen8452
      @aegonitargaryen8452 2 ปีที่แล้ว +97

      @@grantorino2325 It’s about the anime “One Piece”.
      The real life pirate was Edward Teach. In the anime, he inspired two pirates Edward “Whitebeard” Newgate and Marshall D. Teach aka “Blackbeard”. While Whitebeard has his personality and I don’t know how to put it- maybe the word aura, the anime Blackbeard got his savagery and cunningness of a pirate from the actual Blackbeard. The anime Blackbeard said this quote. Hope this help.

  • @scbd-king8461
    @scbd-king8461 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Angry OP sounds

  • @chasjetty8729
    @chasjetty8729 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for coming back.

  • @nightangelx1513
    @nightangelx1513 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9254

    “I must be disturbed, but that’s one sickness I can get down with.” That was really good

  • @sweetchilli1261
    @sweetchilli1261 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5276

    Just do it like in One Piece

    • @gingermcgingin1733
      @gingermcgingin1733 4 ปีที่แล้ว +303

      That would require eating magical fruit to gain superpowers. And because of JoJo's I know that there's even odds of said fruit petrifing me.

    • @MochaPhilanthropist
      @MochaPhilanthropist 4 ปีที่แล้ว +68

      I wish I can get petrified by that magical fruit holder

    • @strangetomato3021
      @strangetomato3021 4 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      YA YO YA YO

    • @TheDxDKID
      @TheDxDKID 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Agree

    • @inspiringer6418
      @inspiringer6418 4 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      Just eat two devil fruits

  • @kristenlindesy95
    @kristenlindesy95 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    God I needed this today

  • @codylgarcia
    @codylgarcia ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I now want to see a realistic pirate movie.

    • @via45
      @via45 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      ​​@User what did he say that's not true? I've heard all these things he said before, granted he's not painting an accurate picture, he's saying all the bag things if being a pirate , hence the title.

    • @tangytango2749
      @tangytango2749 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@TheRatsintheWalls Largely inaccurate video actually. The pirate diet was incredibly varied. Half of this video is myths.

  • @Lymbo88
    @Lymbo88 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12465

    Not to mention (something you don't see in most pirate movies) splinters. In those sea battles, the ships are made out of mostly wood. In the movies, you see cannons blowing up parts of a ship while the crew run around panicked. You don't see people getting their faces shredded to paste when a cannon hits too close and sends thousands of pieces of sharp wood flying at them.
    Also drowning. People drowning all the time. Being stuck inside a capsizing ship, or being nowhere near land when the ship goes down... Lots of bodies down there. Hard to swim 100's of miles when your leg just got blown off.
    Infections, too. Barely any medical supplies. If you're lucky, there MIGHT be a doctor on board, but he's not gonna be able to do much besides bandage you.
    Yo ho yo ho

    • @RougeDragon-sp2pd
      @RougeDragon-sp2pd 2 ปีที่แล้ว +443

      You will never kill my dreams I will be a pirate if its the last thing I do

    • @m1k3l1f3
      @m1k3l1f3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +236

      Well....at least their flags were cool

    • @darkhero4504
      @darkhero4504 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      May i See your pantsu
      Yo ho Ho Ho

    • @DictatorAtWill
      @DictatorAtWill 2 ปีที่แล้ว +195

      There's a scene in Master and Commander where one of the younger officers gets hit by a rather large splinter. It gets infected, and the doctor needs to amputate the kid's arm. No painkillers, no precise medical equipment, just some restraints to keep him from flailing around and a strap of leather to keep him from biting his own tongue off.

    • @JacViramuerte
      @JacViramuerte 2 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      @@DictatorAtWill was about to comment about this scene too haha, love that film!

  • @felphero
    @felphero 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7467

    Losing eyes and limbs was also extremely common, thus the famous hook-hand,wooden leg and pirate eye-patch steriotypes

    • @karaltar7914
      @karaltar7914 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Not to mention you wouldn’t even look cool you would just look like some hobbo who got attacked by rats and didn’t have stuff to bandage the wounds

    • @bigdaddyuwu6587
      @bigdaddyuwu6587 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      god why everyone in this comment section such a boomer

    • @JobiWan144
      @JobiWan144 ปีที่แล้ว +657

      The eye patch isn't about losing eyes though. Seamen with two working eyes would wear eye patches so that one eye would be adjusted to the daylight above deck while the other eye would be immediately adjusted to the near-total darkness below deck.

    • @alliexcx5576
      @alliexcx5576 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Interesting!

    • @alliexcx5576
      @alliexcx5576 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @Big Daddy Uwu Im gen z

  • @TrulySoviet2436
    @TrulySoviet2436 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Hear no weevil, see no weevil, taste no weevil.

  • @dustinwheelerq
    @dustinwheelerq ปีที่แล้ว

    So glad I found this channel

  • @TheRealW.S.Foster
    @TheRealW.S.Foster 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5050

    He forgot to add that there's a 50/50 chance you'll eat a questionable piece of fruit, gain a power from it that varies from godly to stupid and not be able to swim anymore after eating it.

    • @spindash64
      @spindash64 3 ปีที่แล้ว +276

      Most pirates can’t swim anyway, so whatever

    • @funkytime69
      @funkytime69 2 ปีที่แล้ว +94

      So, drugs

    • @Zinfiny
      @Zinfiny 2 ปีที่แล้ว +77

      @@funkytime69 no fruit

    • @user-sx8lj9xe1y
      @user-sx8lj9xe1y 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      It be great if reality was like that but then deal with pirates that are probably assholes

    • @CeshBundicoot
      @CeshBundicoot 2 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      chefs kiss reference

  • @lexithepitbill1154
    @lexithepitbill1154 4 ปีที่แล้ว +646

    Scurvy is much more terrifying than I thought it was

    • @graylindblad1261
      @graylindblad1261 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      AVAST YE SCURVY DOG!! Sir... captain... WHAT!!?! My gums are bleeding.
      No body cares!!
      And then crew die

    • @tenacity2633
      @tenacity2633 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @PessiOpt 9 !
      One piece?

    • @georgy2596
      @georgy2596 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Now the we got scurvy song from sponge bob is terrifying

    • @MySerpentine
      @MySerpentine 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      It also makes every wound you've ever had come back, because all your scar tissue dissolves!

    • @assassinmanx6128
      @assassinmanx6128 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Well supposedly real rum back then was pure fruit? So they should of gotten vitamin C from oranges/apples etc. If anything STDs killed their ass quicker. Then island hopped and rapped women and prostitutes 100% unprotected so after months/years of that with no cleansing? Yea their dicks fell off or they died slowly. Jus a thesis lol.

  • @LordMondegrene
    @LordMondegrene ปีที่แล้ว +12

    "Most Horrible Diseases" is a rich subject, with entire books devoted to some of the more horrifying, like "RABID" about the many manifestations of rabies, which may be the source for the Native American "Windigo" shape-shifting super strong cannibal legends.
    Porphyria's another one, may be why we have vampire myths in Transylvania, where the genetic disease presents in varying levels, from crooked teeth and a tendency to sunburn, all the way up to snaggle toothed hideously burned and rotting cannibals hiding from the sun in crypts, wating for nightfall to replace body fluids lost from all those horrible burns with good old people juice.
    Or how about the 1784 eruption of Eyafjallajokull, which caused global cooling, mass starvation, the French Revolution, AND the most horrific volcano zombieism, due to fluoride nuking your brains, so that even HORSES were eating each other.
    WHILE THEY WERE STILL ALIVE.
    WITH FLESH ROTTING OFF THEM IN STRIPS.
    ZOMBIE HORSES, MAN.
    Along with 17 months of nonstop eruption, rivers and lakes of lava, and a heroic priest who documented the gruesome, "End of Days" spectacle in harrowing detail.
    Fucking epic, real-life horror.

    • @plant7371
      @plant7371 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I didn't realize that was what inspired those myths! That's sick in more ways than one.

  • @michaelmehserdjian9644
    @michaelmehserdjian9644 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Easy solution: use your eternal log pose to travel to the closest island to find a dinosaur to eat. Duh

  • @catattack9575
    @catattack9575 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5301

    Not gonna lie, your description of scurvy just sounds like puberty.
    Tired at all times
    Covered in weird spots
    Death
    It's all covered. Exact same thing.

    • @finjaquetemumnomeaqui4838
      @finjaquetemumnomeaqui4838 4 ปีที่แล้ว +89

      Yeah lol, I'm 13 right now and I'm bleeding from my gums, XD

    • @doesthisIookinfected
      @doesthisIookinfected 4 ปีที่แล้ว +94

      don't forget the b l o o d

    • @meemo_bear
      @meemo_bear 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Wow, hilarious it's so much funnier when you copy someone and say it, I just feel you nailed the delivery

    • @doesthisIookinfected
      @doesthisIookinfected 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      @@meemo_bear bro I was talking about periods.

    • @aadraws614
      @aadraws614 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Church of VSCO p e r i o d

  • @eldestboat0159
    @eldestboat0159 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1625

    *Monkey D. Luffy has left the chat*

    • @mechawolf165
      @mechawolf165 3 ปีที่แล้ว +67

      He fell asleep after the intro

    • @orang9407
      @orang9407 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Marines have entered the chat

    • @Naija_Ninja
      @Naija_Ninja 3 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      *Pirate hunter Zoro joined the chat*
      "Oi, where did those idiots wander off to? Isn't this the straw hat crew chat?"

    • @Avarice297
      @Avarice297 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Luckily Franky made the Thousand Sunny so those issues are negated.

    • @iagreewithyou20yearsago95
      @iagreewithyou20yearsago95 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Thousand Sunny is kinda a yacht so they're fine

  • @josesaldana2624
    @josesaldana2624 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Window open, lamp on, coffee in hand, and samonela on the screen. Perfect

  • @nonnodacciaio704
    @nonnodacciaio704 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I regularly come back to this video just to watch the intro

  • @zomb_rei
    @zomb_rei ปีที่แล้ว +5

    being a pirate is so fun now, i can play any 3ds game i want free of charge

  • @spyjonsachurin2101
    @spyjonsachurin2101 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2343

    I love the description of below deck.

    • @HoneydewBeach
      @HoneydewBeach 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      they should remake it to be historically accurate

    • @HoneydewBeach
      @HoneydewBeach 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      wait are you talking about the show or actually below the deck

    • @akosacs01
      @akosacs01 5 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      @@HoneydewBeach That took you 1 week to figure out?

    • @HoneydewBeach
      @HoneydewBeach 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      ​@@akosacs01
      I need clarification. You were referring to the show, right?

    • @gdolphinz7486
      @gdolphinz7486 5 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      “You feel something furry brush against you and it’s either the body of a diseased rat or the beard of your diseased crewmate, either way, it’s probably where the piss came from”

  • @tardarsauce1842
    @tardarsauce1842 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1947

    Pirates in cartoons: cheerful and loves the power of friendship
    Pirates in real life:

    • @ashadeofblue6815
      @ashadeofblue6815 3 ปีที่แล้ว +134

      cheerful and loves the power of extreme violence

    • @lettuce3036
      @lettuce3036 2 ปีที่แล้ว +62

      pirates now: free terraria

    • @4blaire4
      @4blaire4 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      cheerful and loves the power of gayness

    • @saidochar7198
      @saidochar7198 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@lettuce3036 fr

    • @lettuce3036
      @lettuce3036 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@saidochar7198 yeah i pirated some games for free lol

  • @DexTag
    @DexTag ปีที่แล้ว

    OMG I FOUND YOU AGAIN AFTER ALL THESE YEARS, FINALLY

  • @DZC-bc2ol
    @DZC-bc2ol 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    We ain't finding one piece with this one 🗣️🗣️🗣️

  • @JustinY.
    @JustinY. 6 ปีที่แล้ว +24412

    Thanks for debunking one piece

    • @Marixchatt
      @Marixchatt 6 ปีที่แล้ว +253

      Yeah I saw you actully comment on a comment :(

    • @boimann7583
      @boimann7583 6 ปีที่แล้ว +281

      Justin Y. Burn in hell

    • @jemswhy7382
      @jemswhy7382 6 ปีที่แล้ว +70

      Rip justin

    • @raviloli6811
      @raviloli6811 6 ปีที่แล้ว +251

      HOW HOW HOW HOW YOU FCKING DEMON. GODDAMN EVERYWHERE.

    • @lutemis3119
      @lutemis3119 6 ปีที่แล้ว +51

      Maybe its a bot?

  • @marcelj6979
    @marcelj6979 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1662

    "Pirates never take other people's property"
    Isn't that the freaking point

    • @scumbagbenis8762
      @scumbagbenis8762 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      What

    • @astronautindisguise
      @astronautindisguise 4 ปีที่แล้ว +159

      slit fidget spinner dab bod mod an old Disney show had some kid pirates who made a “code of pirates” and one of the rules was “A pirate never takes other people’s property”

    • @scumbagbenis8762
      @scumbagbenis8762 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      @@astronautindisguise okay well that was a retarded and out of nowhere comment to make as if i would know what it would mean

    • @cristhianramirez6939
      @cristhianramirez6939 4 ปีที่แล้ว +79

      @@scumbagbenis8762 The comment wasn't directed at you specifically. Get out off here

    • @okokisafuckingloser6298
      @okokisafuckingloser6298 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      God that show was horrible

  • @zikjleiv5877
    @zikjleiv5877 ปีที่แล้ว

    6 year anniversary Sam. What a landmark

  • @craigbrown5359
    @craigbrown5359 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Absolutely hysterical!!!

  • @ibuzz2544
    @ibuzz2544 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1512

    Are we gonna pretend we didn’t see the last four types of diseases....

    • @alamo0243
      @alamo0243 3 ปีที่แล้ว +148

      D I C K R O T

    • @charliegarrison9688
      @charliegarrison9688 3 ปีที่แล้ว +88

      Rotting dick jungles sounds bad 👎

    • @youngveggies6558
      @youngveggies6558 3 ปีที่แล้ว +72

      The pirates would get down and dirty a *lot*
      and they weren't close-minded if you catch my drift.

    • @scl1332
      @scl1332 3 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      J U N G L E D I C K R O T

    • @DarethLover67
      @DarethLover67 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I was waiting for this comment

  • @andrewmg5915
    @andrewmg5915 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1292

    When I was a kid I liked pirates a lot until I came across an historical book and read the story of a pirate named L' Olonnais. The book described detailedly how he was fooled by a tribe who got him drunk, then he was tortured and then dimembered, possibly partially eaten too. Not so much fun after all.

    • @__-yz1ob
      @__-yz1ob 4 ปีที่แล้ว +141

      You sure read some interesting books as a child

    • @VibrationCrystals
      @VibrationCrystals 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      That’s brutal! How old were you when you read this?

    • @justsomeunicornwithinterne6490
      @justsomeunicornwithinterne6490 3 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      Reminds me of the time I got a hold of some old history books at 9. Very graphic pictures. I’ve changed immensely since that incident.

    • @misscath28
      @misscath28 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      I love animals and I own a rabbit
      Anyway since I learned my dad hunted rabbits I now know why I constantly like hugging bunnies
      *cause I don't want them to run away and get hunted*

    • @i_teleported_bread7404
      @i_teleported_bread7404 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      That's barbaric! You got a spare copy?

  • @7Calvin60643
    @7Calvin60643 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Hahahaha!! This guy is hilarious!! I’ve just now discovered him. I hope he still makes content.

  • @Svoorhout85
    @Svoorhout85 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2199

    In the Netherlands we have a phrase for pirates that translates to "free as a bird". Wich meant the law no longer applied to you, but neither would it protect you. So it basically meant anyone could kill you on sight and probably be rewarded for it.

    • @Gucci-dj3ko
      @Gucci-dj3ko 2 ปีที่แล้ว +71

      Like the german „vogelfrei“?

    • @GunUDwnAt2nd
      @GunUDwnAt2nd ปีที่แล้ว +93

      We call those "outlaws".

    • @peterk.2108
      @peterk.2108 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@GunUDwnAt2nd outside the law

    • @sangodan3031
      @sangodan3031 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      ​@@peterk.2108 Sharp as a bullet

    • @MarcoAdventures
      @MarcoAdventures ปีที่แล้ว +15

      How has noone made a Free Bird joke in this reply thread yet.

  • @seabe2345
    @seabe2345 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1703

    How tf are you not more popular?

    • @SecureLemons
      @SecureLemons 7 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      fairly new channel

    • @wergersnee
      @wergersnee 7 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      1st time i've seen it but i subbed, thanks for your inquiry

    • @miaowmiaowchowface
      @miaowmiaowchowface 7 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      dis channel gon be big

    • @tickedsanchez629
      @tickedsanchez629 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I know right

    • @corrosive_st
      @corrosive_st 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      seabe2345 because people have opinions

  • @apackalu2718
    @apackalu2718 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Nothing will stop me FROM BEING KING OF THE PIRATES.

  • @fall3n245
    @fall3n245 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    The opening dialogue kills me. First and favorite Sam o nella video

  • @hardxzun
    @hardxzun 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1544

    beer was actually healthier than water because water conditions that time sucked and you need to heat the water for beer

    • @bobmcbob49
      @bobmcbob49 3 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      which is why militaries regularly marched with beer or wine

    • @saltysoysauce954
      @saltysoysauce954 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      I don't think the heat killed bacteria, I think it was the alcohol

    • @hardxzun
      @hardxzun 3 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      @@saltysoysauce954 Both, boiling water at 65°C or 149°F kill bacteria.

    • @saltysoysauce954
      @saltysoysauce954 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      @@hardxzun That aint boiling but I get what you mean

    • @haydeen6535
      @haydeen6535 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      This is actually not true. DRINKING water conditions at this time were absolutely fine. It’s just all the other water that was all fucked up, but they didn’t drink that water

  • @cifer8070
    @cifer8070 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1682

    If I can sing "leave her johnny" with my boys on a ship
    I see that as an absolute win

    • @snowpawwolf1123
      @snowpawwolf1123 2 ปีที่แล้ว +61

      Bro I legit want to start a sea shanty club or something like where we rent a little boat every month or two and go out on the lake to sing sea shanties, but nobody wants to do it with me 🙃

    • @Qwerty-jc3so
      @Qwerty-jc3so 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      "A fish in the sea" is my favorite shanty

    • @bigcb6148
      @bigcb6148 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@Qwerty-jc3so come all you young sailor man listen to me , I will sing you the song of the fish in the sea

    • @mohamedfodhil9908
      @mohamedfodhil9908 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@bigcb6148 windy weather boys sotrmy weather boys when the wind blows we're all together boys

    • @bigcb6148
      @bigcb6148 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@mohamedfodhil9908 blew ye winds westerly blew ye winds blow. Jolly sowester by steady she goes
      Up jumps the eel with its slippery tail
      Climbs up aloft and reachs the topsail

  • @koukouzee2923
    @koukouzee2923 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    This is like the 10th time this gets recommended and I watch it over the years

  • @Silveryback
    @Silveryback ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Hilarious and educational, as always.

  • @Lrdnqustr
    @Lrdnqustr 5 ปีที่แล้ว +952

    also, being a pirate means being an enemy of many empires

    • @Burn_Angel
      @Burn_Angel 4 ปีที่แล้ว +73

      Unless they paid you to assault spanish ships.

    • @ConstantChaos1
      @ConstantChaos1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      And?

    • @noahalban6384
      @noahalban6384 4 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      Many pirates were privateers (state-sponsored pirates) so they were essentially payed to take gold from ships of enemy kingdoms. Became a huge problem when the New World was discovered because so many ships returned to Europe from the Americas and had a fuck ton of silver. England decided to hire privateers to loot these Spanish ships. A big reason why the armada attacked england

    • @whiterosecicero4802
      @whiterosecicero4802 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Noah Alban Privateering had more regulation then just being pirates. You needed a mark of a privateer (document of sort) to be legal and could only operate against the enemies of the nation you got the mark from. Luckily England was at war with Spain a lot. During peace time if these privateers continued then they were pirates and could be executed. Many pirates were privateers first then pirates as they wanted to continue making mad cash and not share it with their employers.

    • @kckdude913
      @kckdude913 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@noahalban6384 Yeah I feel like that's mainly the reason why they're romanticized a lot, despite being basically thieves and murderers.
      Had most pirates been Spanish ones attacking the English, I think the way they'd be viewed today would be very different.