THE NARCISSISTIC DECEPTIVE ART OF TRI-ANGULATION

THE NARCISSISTIC DECEPTIVE ART OF TRI-ANGULATION
Triangulation is when a toxic manipulative narcissistic person, brings a third person into their relationship in order to remain in control of their targeted victim. There will be limited or no communication between the two triangulated individuals except through the manipulator. It involves the narcissist complaining about you to someone else in an attempt to manipulate an issue in their favor.
Narcissistic individuals create the triangle to gain the upper hand when they begin to lose control of the situation.
Usually, they’ll bring in someone loyal who will do their ‘bidding’. The person is seen as the narcissist’s defender or ‘flying monkey.’ Narcissists have many flying monkeys that they’ll quickly dispatch to act on their behalf.
You’ll notice they practice triangulation more in their close relationships, e.g., with their romantic partners, relatives, siblings, ministry people, mentees, or friends.
However, a narcissistic boss-or even a co-worker-may triangulate you with your colleagues to enhance or undermine your productivity.
A narcissist may bring up an ex-lover or someone they’re aware you’re not thrilled about. They may speak highly of the person. If it’s an ex, they might say, “He/she was such a great partner” or “He/she wants me back.”
Mentioning another man or woman can make you feel jealous or inferior to the third party. The goal is to make you react negatively. Getting you worked up reassures them that you care.
Remember, narcissists need to consistently know that other people admire and love them. Otherwise, they feel worthless.
The workplace could become an environment for gaslighting and triangulation if your boss is a narcissist.
They already hold power over you and may use it to their advantage. One example is comparing you with your workmate to make you feel incompetent or work harder.
Proverbs 16:28
A perverse man sows strife, And a whisperer separates the best of friends.
The narcissistic parent works to buy their child's love to make the other parent look or feel bad. In many cases, this form of narcissistic triangulation is used to try to force the other parent to revert to doing things how the narcissistic parent thinks they should be done.
If a parent refuses to acknowledge their children's personality and individualism, and at the same time,
How to defend against triangulation
Step 1: Be aware of when triangulation is happening
Understanding what narcissists usually say and do when in the process of triangulation is the first key step to confronting it.
Step 2: Request a meeting with all parties
Getting the narcissist and their henchmen to agree to a meeting isn’t going to be easy. Narcissists are very cunning and are careful with linking you with their allies.
Step 3: Give your side of the story
Usually, the third party in the triangle isn’t someone you’ll have easy access to. Besides, the narcissist may go out of their way to prevent contact between you two.
Step 4: Be prepared for the third person to defend the narcissist
Dealing with the toxic behavior of a narcissistic parent, partner, friend, or boss is already mentally taxing. Now there’s a third party who can make your life as difficult as the narcissist.
Step 5: Cut the third party out of the equation
If the third party comes to you on their own to do the narcissist’s bidding, this provides an opportunity to take a different approach. Instead of trying to hash things out with them, tell them you’re going to handle the problem directly with the narcissist.
Step 6: Remove yourself from the triangle
Alternatively, you can choose not to participate in any three-way interaction with them and the narcissist.
Simply bypass the third party and communicate directly to the wrongdoer (the narc). Do this if you determine that communicating with the other party will make things worse.
Step 7: Call out narcissistic triangulation
Taking a calm and respectful approach, tell the narcissist you observed a pattern of involving others in your relationship, work, or family affairs. Ask them why they insist on taking that route. Trust me, they’ll act as if they don’t know what you’re talking about.
Step 8: Set boundaries
Explain to the narcissist that even though you love them, you won’t accept them violating your relationship this way. Be assertive and confident when laying down the rules and boundaries
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[@iw06-k2l]

I went through this not knowing what it was

[@yvonnemariehorvatr.h.n.nut3315]

I just started listening to you and I have to compliment you on the way you were things it's very simple and easy to understand and very explicit and knowledgeable very clear precise iwords that anybody can understand

[@markh4926]

This video helps me understand a present situation. I'd write the situation down, but it sounds so much like a soap opera. I watched part of those films because my sisters were hooked on them, but to me they were just frustrating and endless nonsense.

[@ashleyb777]

I think I see this happening with my new son in laws mom and sister. It appears to be coming from the sister, but it's his mom who never wanted him to marry. His sister gets upset. cries and has openly voiced her "worry' over her brother marrying and how this "could change" her relationship with her brother.

[@katyasehryn8810]

Genuine question about point 3. In most cases the flying monkey will not believe you and the Narc will gaslight & lie. This could cause conflict. So what's the point? I could see having a meeting with ONLY the flying monkey but there is no guarantee they will accept the truth either.

[@jackiecolbert3915]

Omg exactly what happened to me and my ex husband left me for his high school sweetheart after 21yrs married. 2yrs and it's been rough. They have done so much to upset me.

[@mayazucenama]

😮🥲