TBH Just writing letters and more in person socialization without tech. Ironic...here on YT. 😅 But I have a mostly non verbal child that dislikes the virtual voice tech/AAC, he actually prefers writing. Unfortunately no one really has been willing to keep in contact this way. I also love letters and cards in the mail. 😊 Even my parents have a hard time getting off of their phones. I rarely get to see them and when I do they have to really resist texting or commenting and sharing videos. It can be handy for sure but it's too much most times. Just saying hello with a smile and chatting with a stranger is even something more rare now. I don't consider myself a social butterfly or even an extrovert but I've had some amazing conversations this way. And it can cheer someone up! So many people today are mistrusting and negative it seems. They think if you smile and wave you're gullible or naive too. At least in my more suburb-metro area. I think if more people just tried to do this the world would be better off for it.
LOVE that you want to trust your intuition more. Mamas have been raising good people for centuries by listening to their own sensibilities. Parenting has become very academic, and it must be a balance of experts AND Mama-sense.
ABSOLUTELY!!!! There is such a balance that needs to happen for mamas today. So much of what is taught and expected of mothers today goes against our intuition. Thanks for taking the time to comment ❤️
Agreed. 💕 Sometimes intuition can lead to seeking answers. Knowing you don't know can be intuitive and feeling when you need to reach out and how. I have a very hard time knowing when and how to ask for help. I feel that when I have (especially as a mom) it's bit me in the backside. But I know in my heart that it's important to not let that stop me when I feel I need help.
We just cleaned out all of our kids plastic toys. ALL OF THEM! We were completely overwhelmed with toys. Now they have a select few wooden toys to play with inside or they go outside and play with nature. It's a beautiful thing. And they seem less frazzled and overwhelmed with cleaning up their messes. They want to help me with all my daily chores so that has been fun too! We have Amish neighbors so we always talk about being more like them or Pa and Ma Ingalls 😊
WOW!! Thank you for sharing. I find it so interesting to see how kids shift after a change like this! It sounds like they are really doing well and thriving without them! What a blessing. I'm so glad to have you here ❤️
@slowishparenting Thank you! Happy to be here! It has been a wonderful change that's for sure! Kids don't need tons of toys. We were feeling like the toys were just bogging them down. Plus I also recently just learned about the toxic chemicals in plastic toys so it's been good all the way around.
Hi! We also just got rid of more than half of our kids toys. We noticed the same thing. They play more and have less problems cleaning up after themselves. We also have Amish neighbors and we have become very good friends with them! I love their “simple” lives.
I have 4 kiddos and we've managed to keep toys to the minimum the past 9 years!!! We have one smallish toy box upstairs and one downstairs and anytime it's starts to look overflowing, we sort through and donate or toss anything that we don't need or use!!
Not exactly a tip from the past but I've really noticed recently that when i get spare time im straight on my phone and then i come away not feeling rested! When ive tried to cut out the social media/endless messages ive actually found ive got bored! Which is such a luxury and big insight into how much time i actually have! (And how much time mums of yesteryear had) I think if i had the energy to see people more in person i wouldnt have to spend so long on whatsapp lol ❤ thanks for a lovely video xx
I agree with this! I’m always saying “I don’t have enough time to start a garden” then i calculate how long I sit in front of a screen and It makes me realize i have about 6 spare hours a day that I just scroll or watch a show. It’s crazy.
Absolutely! Although, making these changes cold turkey can be difficult. I find making small goals (like no phone for the first hour of the day) helps me to make positive connections to being without my phone. When that goal is met with ease.. I extend the time. Hope this helps ❤️
My 3 year old loves to whittle a stick. It's his favorite time to just go out and be alone and quiet with himself. He cut himself once, not very badly. I was not far away, saw him react and helped when he needed it. He corrected himself, figured it out a little better and has more knife skills than most teenage boys now. We live in the US.
Wow!! It's rare to find a mama here in the US that's all good with this kind of thing. This so reminds me of a danish way to parent... Thanks for sharing ❤️
I love your comments about making the whole home a safe space. I have cordoned my kids off in the kitchen with me for far too long. Just last week I snapped and decided we needed to take down some walls in our closed off kitchen so that they could play in the other rooms and I could have a glimpse of them. I need to lighten up and stop panicking over messes. I also need to remove some things from the area so that my mind can be at ease! I’m not a SAHM but I work from home, and so much of your video really speaks to my heart, so thank you!
I'm sorry this took so long for me to get back to. I love that you enjoyed this video so much. Gosh.. I feel like I did that with my first. I was so restricted on where she could play because I was worried about her getting into something. When I took down the decorations... and all the "pretty" things.. suddenly we all had more space to breathe. Thank you again ❤️
I talked to my mom about this, she had 11 of us!! She said it was easy for her because there was no expectation of playdates, swim lessons, birthday parties every weekend, appointments, ect.---- my mom didn't even have a car. We lived a very quiet, boring life; but that is exactly what is needed during the season of small children. There was no interruption of naps, no late nights, no getting behind because she was home everday. We left the apartment to go for walks or play at the playground in front of the complex. That's it. We had a happy childhood. No Disneyland trips. 😅 Mind you, we grew up in Eastern Europe so the culture was in place for that lifestyle. But it sounds similar to what grandparents and great grandparents would have experienced.
It's amazing to hear that there are parts of this earth that still are a bit more "Old Fashioned." How cool that you were able to grow up this way. There is so much expectation today. I hope us modern mommas can begin to unlearn it! Thank you for sharing.. I hope my content continues to resonate with you ❤️
I’m sooooo glad I came across your video! 🥹 I just recently left teaching after 9 years, to stay home and raise our two little ones. I feel so blessed to have a husband that has supported my dream of wanting to be the one to raise our kids instead of a sitter… I find myself alone and overwhelmed though at times but I’m realizing that it’s very common for SAHM’s…just trying to navigate this new norm for me
Gosh.. transitions are hard!! Sometimes the transition phase also lasts longer than we would like. Thank you for taking the time to comment.. and I hope that my channel encourages you along your journey!! ❤️
I'm a grandma. Even stay at moms had side hustles. Sometimes selling eggs, ironing clothes for professional women, baking secret recipes cookies or breads for holidays, cake decorating. Whatever, it was one specialized skill the mom became known for.
I love that you called your grandfather. I love and miss my pappy every day. 💔 so sweet that you have that relationship with him. Continue to cherish it. I also am a stay at home mom of 3 boys and I homeschool. I know the feeling of feeling alone! Thanks for sharing 💜
I so do... I call him every couple of weeks. It's such a gift! Thank you for being here.. for commenting and sharing a little bit of your story. I hope you enjoy my content ❤️
My mother got my sister and me cleaning from the age of 7. We loved it because we felt grown up and we were halping Mummy. The things we learned have served us well.
Thank you for these advices! I love that they come to life again. I raised my Children in the 90th - from 1988 onwards and had 4 children - and often had trouble making other people realize that I never neglected them (climbing trees- actually quite little ones, either me or my husband could lend them a hand if it needed to be) but the people thought otherwise and sometimes argued nastily, until one of the children got hurt, ran up to me and I snuggled them like they had to be comforted to being able to run off again- often after 10 seconds- then these people walked away silently. there was never a major injury though it well could have happen, it was more that my children got sure of what they were able to do and which actions were dangerous and better not done. - This parenting of having trust in the children , especially the little ones from Baby up to 5 years it is quite easy to do and does the least harm and they will be able to transform the skills they learned at that young age into their childhood steps with rather few guide lines. --But as important as that is be always in reach (doing your own things) for the child if it needs you and then be fully aware of the grief of the child. that is most important take your child in earnest (I don`t remember if that is the right word in English, because I am Deutsche).To All of you I wish a fulfilling and blooming life!!!!
I do not have kids yet, but have looked forward to the day since I was a little kid myself!! I love learning about these things in my waiting and preparing my heart and discovering what my values are and what might work for our future family. I love these ideas about falling back to what was done before and finding that balance with it and today. The idea about having specific meals on specific days and sort of having a rotation and hearing your girls enjoy that is so cool and sweet! I enjoy learning about minimalism as well. Having less can be so freeing. Its still something i continuously have to work on. I still have a lot of stuff and need to declutter regularly. In preparation for children though, my husband and I have gradually shifted our expenses towards bills and debt and saving versus spending on random wants that we can honestly live without. I would much rather have a better quality home with space for a growing family rather than cramming the house full of all our "wants" that in the end hold way less value. Thanks for sharing!! I definitely want to come back to this later as a reminder as I get closer to the day of having my first little one! Praying you and your family are blessed and doing well!!
I love that you are not a mama yet, but you are starting think about how you want to show up as a mom!! Thank you for being here.. and I hope you continue to enjoy my channel ❤️
I need this reassurance ,thank you so much . I feel we all sometimes think that Just being a dedicated Sahm is not enough when it’s more than enough if not vital in a healthy home
I am a mom of 4 child ages 2, 4, 6, 8. We are homeschooling. It is HARD with the two littlest ones. But, we all grow day by day. My oldest is able to help her little sister to read directions if I have to step away together something or he'll a young one. Take it day by day and even hour by hour. ♡
I appreciate you sharing this. My girls are 2 and 4.. and I am starting to see a glimpse of less "demand" for needing me. I love that your oldest is able to help her little sister. I'm hopeful that my girls will be that way. We want more kiddos and it's moms like you that encourage me that when that day comes.. it won't be nearly as impossible to survive as it feels. Also.. love that you homeschool. It's our first year and I'm loving it!!!! ❤️
Girl I’ve got 5, Ages 12, 10, 7, 5, and 2…. And you find ways to make it work, but you’re right, take it day by day, make the choice to enjoy these short years.. and be kind to yourself and your kids AND your spouse… And never actually stop… slow down and breathe… but don’t stop otherwise you’ll realize how tired you actually are 😂
@@dominiquejones1091 This had me laughing.. "never actually stop.. slow down and breathe.. but don't stop" hahahah too funny!! Thank you for being here ❤
I have 4 children ages 6, 5, 3, 1 and a bunch of in the oven. I homeschool too. I don’t stop because if I do I will lose momentum if you know what I mean. I appreciate you sharing! It’s so easy for us to feel like we are alone.
Great tips! Creating safe indoor and outdoor spaces has helped my 4year old burn off energy. But I find I struggle the most with letting him do things himself because I don't feel like cleaning it up...but he gets so much satisfaction out of things like pouring his own milk, spreading peanut butter himself etc. He also loves baking and yes it makes a mess but it's a great way to learn basic measurements and to bond!
Hahah I'm giggling a little... this is so me... I see how happy this makes my kids and sometimes I'm just not in the mood to clean up messes. When I have capacity.. I so enjoy these moments with the kids. Thanks for sharing ❤️
I find myself being able to stay home next year and trying to slow down my life. I cannot wait. There will be sacrifices but I get to home with my children. Thank you for this!
Thank you for sharing!! How exciting to have the opportunity to stay home! What a gift. I just shared in another comment how there definitely is an adjustment period... it's hard... but as everyone navigates this change.. things will get easier. Thanks for being here ❤️
I’m a brand new SAHM it has been an honor to tend to my home my children are ages 13,4& 2 ….. i’ve had to Shake off the mentality of societal expectations / standards 😅 it was a tough transition for sure . Even weaning myself from social media … 1 hr a day on your phone = to 15 days in a year 🤯 15 days to have done better things w my time ❤😊
Awww this is so exciting!!! I'm so happy that you are here at the beginning of your journey. You are so right about societal expectations and standards. It's rough. It's normal to have a transition period... and it be difficult. Doesn't mean you don't love it.. I look at it as an adjustment period. Thank you for being here and taking the time to comment ❤️
I agree with the slow parenting. Involved, responsible & free. On the note of the medical field trying to educate patients, An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.
Love this!! I do feel in my personal experience, that when the intuition is lost for mothers this is detrimental to the child's growth and development. Coming from a medically complex mama, I feel that we are not educated on how to do this safely. Fear and scarcity is used instead. So many other countries do a MUCH better job at keeping the mother/child relationship at the forefront of importance.. while educated on how to do so safely. Thank you for sharing ❤
Families working together at dinner. I really enjoy my children voluntarily coming in to assist with meal prep😊❤ also makes them more likely to try new foods ect Great discussion 😊❤🎉🎉
YESSSS!!! I love that you mentioned how they are more likely to try new foods. This helped my particular eater try different foods. Thanks for sharing ❤️
I am raising my granddaughter. In my childhood I spent weekends with my grandparents or my aunt. That seems to be a thing of the past. I also had few toys and my granddaughter has mostly imaginative things she can play with, and not very many of those. That way she is not overwhelmed and neither are we. Plus, I include her my homemaking activities and she loves this. Nice video. Thank you.
Wow isn't that so interesting. I'm curious how old you were when you spent weekends with your grandparents/aunts? It does feel like it wan't that long ago when this was normal. I hope I can be that grandma for my grandbabies someday!! Thank you for taking the time to comment ❤️
Nice video, good stuff!! As a fellow stay at home parent who rarely gets to hear other adults smh lol I actually clicked on you as background noise as a break from hearing my kiddos. but I found myself agreeing and talking back to you on the screen saying girl yessss on literally all of your habits 😂… safe freedom in my home is called ‘DSS’ and it drives my mom and aunts crazy 😆 they say I scare the byjesus outta them 😌 but hey it’s important I think for my daughters to learn to do dangerous stuff in a safe environment where I’m nearby if needed. It builds confidence 💪🏽. Plus it’s fun to watch.. 😌
I'm so glad that you clicked on this video!!! I laughed as you said it drives your mom and aunts crazy haha. I think our parents generation isn't quite as comfortable with safe freedom. But what a gift you are giving your daughter by helping her to learn how to do things in a safe environment!! I'm so glad you are here ❤️
Thank you for this video! It’s simple advice, I think my family follows a lot of it already because I take a lot of parenting advice from my mom and grandma. (Who were both working moms also). I’m a working mom but I also watch a bunch of these stay at home mom videos because we all go through the same thing! I don’t think this video is stay at home mom specific.
Thank you for your comment!! I do agree.. it's definitely not just for Stay-at-Home moms. I appreciate you being here and I hope you continue enjoying my channel!!
Can you talk more about your dinner schedule? I have a four year old who is a picky eater. We just started doing family style serving and that has helped. We aren't really routine people and the thought of having to make generally the same things on specific days would be an adjustment.
Absolutely!! I love to meal prep the first week in the month. I make a different meal every night... but I make 4x the amount on the recipe, so I can freeze the rest for the remaining 3 weeks in the month. I typically change out 2-3 of our weekly meals each month, so we don't get bored of the meals. I hope this makes sense. There are so many ways to meal prep though.. and I'm definitely not an expert in that department haha
Great video! I use to be very vigilant about keeping my home childproof/child friendly. It used to blow my mind when I would go to my sister's house and she'd have scissors on the counter, no covers on her electrical outlets, leaving water in her bathtub etc..to me, she seemed to lack the ability to foresee danger. The worst was how these things would lead to the child getting screamed at. Ex: Mom leaves the scissors out, then child cuts her hair and gets yelled at. I'm thnking why were scissors even within reach? I feel like there are certain common sense equations Kid+Scissors=bad haircut/bald dog. hahaha.
I have an 8 month old and as she gets more mobile I am very curious how to include her in tasks around the house. I came from a home where I was either given chores or not included at all so that my mom could get things done easier. When I became an adult I realized I didn’t even know how to do some things and had to teach myself. I want my daughter to go out into the world knowing basic domestic skills.
I really appreciate this question! I'm thinking of doing a whole video on it. But in the mean time, you may enjoy Hunt. Gather. Parent!! It's such a good starting point. Hope this helps!!!
I am 10 months ahead of you with my 18 month old. She loves to hand me dishes out of the dishwasher, add ingredients while I'm cooking, or wipe off the counter. I got a learning tower for the kitchen, it is great. Anything that I am doing, I try to find some part she can do. She has always surprised me, she is capable earlier than I expected. She's no good at folding clothes, but she loves to help with everything. 😂
@@alexishancock7930 Thank you for commenting and sharing this! It's so helpful to hear how mamas get their kiddos involved. I really appreciate you taking the time to share ❤
@@slowishparentingyou might include teaching your teenagers to grocery shop. My mom taught me how but most of my friends in college didn’t know what to do.
I'd start with laundry. Sorting the clothes into colours (learning colours), loading and unloading the machine (we have front loaders in the UK so this is easy for a small child, maybe harder with a top loader). Then folding and putting away. Xx
I know this feeling. My grandfather is the only grandparent I have left!!! and I feel so grateful to be able to have these conversations. Thank you for sharing ❤️
When my grandpa would see my daughter (his great-granddaughter) putting something into her mouth off the floor he’d say, “You eat a peck of dirt before you die. So she might as well get it over with!” 😂
Do you have more examples of responsibility they can do? My daughter is 3 and I’m always surprised as to what she is capable of but, looking for some ideas?
@@sarahjc9641 I love this! There was a comment thread that someone started in here about this. But, I’m thinking of doing an upcoming video on it. My girls are 2 + 4, today we had a laundry party… they sorted out their clothes. The oldest attempted to fold hers.. the littlest just matched socks. Loading the dishwasher, loading laundry, washing floors, feeding the dog, making the bed, helping set the table for meals. I never expect them to do chores, but they come alongside me when they are wanting to. Sometimes I do ask for help, but my intention is to teach in that moment… so I’m not frustrated when it doesn’t happen or they need some reminders to follow through. My 4 year old has become quite consistent in wanting to feed the dog and throwing her pjs in the laundry basket. Hopefully some other moms come in with ideas.. this would be helpful as I’m creating some content ❤️
I was going to comment the same. My mom did all of these then transitioned some of them to designated chores once we were 5 or 6. Laundry in particular while I didn't start doing "mine" until my teens mom made sure both me and my brother understood sorting, running the machines, and putting away (honestly the hardest part sometimes lol) from a young age, sometimes assigning us to go do a family load as young as about 8 (we didn't separate people's stuff till teens)
I think the worst part is and probably the main reason more moms are working outside of the home these days is because everything costs so much and it is difficult to live on one income, Not to mention divorce rates have skyrocketed as well so that creates a one-income household with no other parent to provide. But then there are also those people who live way over their means; buying a new fancy car or a big fancy house, expensive fast fashion, etc.
I appreciate you taking the time to comment. I hope you know this video was not at all intended to hurt working moms. Every mom and family has a reason for what they have chosen for their family. My heart in creating this video was to be an encouragement for the SAHMs.. because it feels like there aren't many of us. Thank you for watching and I so hope you enjoy this community ❤
Thank you so much! I’m saving this video to come back to often! New subscriber! ❤ I have three kids (10, 3 and 1) and am working on how I speak to and treat my kids. 😊
I'm sorry this took so long for me to respond. Somehow, I missed a few comments over the last week. Anyways I just wanted to welcome you to the community!! I'm so glad to have you ❤️
ah, there's so many old fashioned things I'd love to see come back! but the question people should ponder is why did it stop? It worked so well IF people got the ideal cards dealt to them, but sadly, financial abuse was a factor in why it wasn't working for women. Then there weren't many options open for women...so women's lib came about to help those people, but then every woman started jumping on board and then respect was lost for the homemaker. We need to bring back respect and understanding of the importance of the lifestyle. People now-a-days are having kids just to pay strangers to raise them. It's sad and dangerous for our society.
Women's lib convinced women (w/all sorts of stories-- little truths, big manipulations) to enter the workforce to become "valuable". WHY?? Bc lenders, banks, & IRS etc. saw an enormous opportunity to capitalize on taxes from two incomes & debt from the brainwashing consumerism. ALL at the expense of children, marriages, families, culture, and environment. (Now, they sell us all the "fixes". 🙄) When we were young we could see how *some* things worked but as we got older, lots of parts came together & the picture became very clear. I'm not convinced we're better off.
You answered your own question with that last sentence. Simply put, no respect for motherhood leads to families falling apart (or never being made in the first place) which weakens our society and means less humans. I definitely oversimplified this but that's the gist. Tons and tons and TONS of stuff out there to explain it further.
Becouse we dont have many kids anymore, as a stay at home mums especially comumnity os very important. Befor houses were maybe living far apart and having 5 plus kods was a norm. Today we need more community and since mums like me moved countries and left our families to start own, feel a deep gap there. And many mums I know in the same situation. Also mums are not being paid. I mean of course, and avatage husbands can not give their wife a salary. But my good husband covers all the essentials. Bit kids at the certain age need extracuricural activities and other things too. Its gets too expensive gor one midlle class pay
@@Joni.Johnson this is a great question! Yes, some childproofing (lock on the closet + dresser drawers, outlet plugs). Along with anchoring big furniture pieces (especially as I began to move into the rest of our home).. But more like decluttering and making the space very minimalistic.. so she could play safely without fear of getting hurt or making a mess! Janet Lansbury talks about a Yes space and I think she does a beautiful job of explaining it!
I wish you would have closed with the staying at home statistic because I want to click off not but haven’t seen the rest of the info. As part of the 70-something percent that may want to incorporate the tips… not the way to start
I’m sorry you felt that way and that the statistic triggered you! My heart was to encourage Stay-at-Home Moms.. and didn’t intend for working mamas to watch. Of course many of these tips can be implemented by all mamas.. but in the last few months, I’ve found myself wanting to create a space for SAHM. It just feels like there aren’t many of us. I appreciate you sharing this feedback.. and I hope you know I understand and respect your decision to work! Thanks for sharing ❤️
I don't work full time but I do work outside of the home and realize at least by old standards would be considered working outside the home. I didn't find it offensive. ❤ and I appreciated the video and pray to be sahm in the near future
@@brandihurd8374 it absolutely does make it hard. It’s a sacrifice for sure. I’ve found myself feeling the financial burden in the last couple of years, with all my daughter’s medical bills. But, for our family, it felt like a sacrifice we were willing to make 😊
![Slow[ish] Parenting](http://yt3.ggpht.com/zyFAbYHejUV8tmnCUpGhN7C-wpFHvn3-U67PByn3QzMBNFigx7ey7t2kbNZmSbu69-g7_HxbqQ=s48-c-k-c0x00ffffff-no-rj)
What’s an Old Fashioned Habit you wish would come back??
TBH Just writing letters and more in person socialization without tech. Ironic...here on YT. 😅 But I have a mostly non verbal child that dislikes the virtual voice tech/AAC, he actually prefers writing. Unfortunately no one really has been willing to keep in contact this way. I also love letters and cards in the mail. 😊
Even my parents have a hard time getting off of their phones. I rarely get to see them and when I do they have to really resist texting or commenting and sharing videos. It can be handy for sure but it's too much most times.
Just saying hello with a smile and chatting with a stranger is even something more rare now.
I don't consider myself a social butterfly or even an extrovert but I've had some amazing conversations this way. And it can cheer someone up! So many people today are mistrusting and negative it seems. They think if you smile and wave you're gullible or naive too. At least in my more suburb-metro area.
I think if more people just tried to do this the world would be better off for it.
LOVE that you want to trust your intuition more. Mamas have been raising good people for centuries by listening to their own sensibilities. Parenting has become very academic, and it must be a balance of experts AND Mama-sense.
ABSOLUTELY!!!! There is such a balance that needs to happen for mamas today. So much of what is taught and expected of mothers today goes against our intuition. Thanks for taking the time to comment ❤️
Agreed. 💕 Sometimes intuition can lead to seeking answers. Knowing you don't know can be intuitive and feeling when you need to reach out and how.
I have a very hard time knowing when and how to ask for help. I feel that when I have (especially as a mom) it's bit me in the backside. But I know in my heart that it's important to not let that stop me when I feel I need help.
We just cleaned out all of our kids plastic toys. ALL OF THEM! We were completely overwhelmed with toys. Now they have a select few wooden toys to play with inside or they go outside and play with nature. It's a beautiful thing.
And they seem less frazzled and overwhelmed with cleaning up their messes. They want to help me with all my daily chores so that has been fun too!
We have Amish neighbors so we always talk about being more like them or Pa and Ma Ingalls 😊
WOW!! Thank you for sharing. I find it so interesting to see how kids shift after a change like this! It sounds like they are really doing well and thriving without them! What a blessing. I'm so glad to have you here ❤️
@slowishparenting Thank you! Happy to be here!
It has been a wonderful change that's for sure!
Kids don't need tons of toys. We were feeling like the toys were just bogging them down. Plus I also recently just learned about the toxic chemicals in plastic toys so it's been good all the way around.
Hi! We also just got rid of more than half of our kids toys. We noticed the same thing. They play more and have less problems cleaning up after themselves. We also have Amish neighbors and we have become very good friends with them! I love their “simple” lives.
We're about to do this too! I'm just waiting for a day for her aunt to watch her so we can just purge 99% of her toys.
I have 4 kiddos and we've managed to keep toys to the minimum the past 9 years!!! We have one smallish toy box upstairs and one downstairs and anytime it's starts to look overflowing, we sort through and donate or toss anything that we don't need or use!!
Not exactly a tip from the past but I've really noticed recently that when i get spare time im straight on my phone and then i come away not feeling rested! When ive tried to cut out the social media/endless messages ive actually found ive got bored! Which is such a luxury and big insight into how much time i actually have! (And how much time mums of yesteryear had) I think if i had the energy to see people more in person i wouldnt have to spend so long on whatsapp lol ❤ thanks for a lovely video xx
I agree with this! I’m always saying “I don’t have enough time to start a garden” then i calculate how long I sit in front of a screen and It makes me realize i have about 6 spare hours a day that I just scroll or watch a show. It’s crazy.
I love that you called being bored a luxury!!! It truly is!! Thank you for taking the time to comment ❤️
Absolutely! Although, making these changes cold turkey can be difficult. I find making small goals (like no phone for the first hour of the day) helps me to make positive connections to being without my phone. When that goal is met with ease.. I extend the time. Hope this helps ❤️
My 3 year old loves to whittle a stick. It's his favorite time to just go out and be alone and quiet with himself. He cut himself once, not very badly. I was not far away, saw him react and helped when he needed it. He corrected himself, figured it out a little better and has more knife skills than most teenage boys now. We live in the US.
My 2.5 year old loves to cut the grass with scissors, I feel less alone now
Wow!! It's rare to find a mama here in the US that's all good with this kind of thing. This so reminds me of a danish way to parent... Thanks for sharing ❤️
My kids too!!!! If only more than one little patch got trimmed 😜
I love your comments about making the whole home a safe space. I have cordoned my kids off in the kitchen with me for far too long. Just last week I snapped and decided we needed to take down some walls in our closed off kitchen so that they could play in the other rooms and I could have a glimpse of them. I need to lighten up and stop panicking over messes. I also need to remove some things from the area so that my mind can be at ease! I’m not a SAHM but I work from home, and so much of your video really speaks to my heart, so thank you!
I'm sorry this took so long for me to get back to. I love that you enjoyed this video so much. Gosh.. I feel like I did that with my first. I was so restricted on where she could play because I was worried about her getting into something. When I took down the decorations... and all the "pretty" things.. suddenly we all had more space to breathe. Thank you again ❤️
I talked to my mom about this, she had 11 of us!! She said it was easy for her because there was no expectation of playdates, swim lessons, birthday parties every weekend, appointments, ect.---- my mom didn't even have a car. We lived a very quiet, boring life; but that is exactly what is needed during the season of small children. There was no interruption of naps, no late nights, no getting behind because she was home everday. We left the apartment to go for walks or play at the playground in front of the complex. That's it. We had a happy childhood. No Disneyland trips. 😅 Mind you, we grew up in Eastern Europe so the culture was in place for that lifestyle. But it sounds similar to what grandparents and great grandparents would have experienced.
It's amazing to hear that there are parts of this earth that still are a bit more "Old Fashioned." How cool that you were able to grow up this way. There is so much expectation today. I hope us modern mommas can begin to unlearn it! Thank you for sharing.. I hope my content continues to resonate with you ❤️
I’m sooooo glad I came across your video! 🥹 I just recently left teaching after 9 years, to stay home and raise our two little ones. I feel so blessed to have a husband that has supported my dream of wanting to be the one to raise our kids instead of a sitter…
I find myself alone and overwhelmed though at times but I’m realizing that it’s very common for SAHM’s…just trying to navigate this new norm for me
Gosh.. transitions are hard!! Sometimes the transition phase also lasts longer than we would like. Thank you for taking the time to comment.. and I hope that my channel encourages you along your journey!! ❤️
I'm a grandma. Even stay at moms had side hustles. Sometimes selling eggs, ironing clothes for professional women, baking secret recipes cookies or breads for holidays, cake decorating. Whatever, it was one specialized skill the mom became known for.
Absolutely!! I really believe that we were meant to have a passion/hobby outside of motherhood. I appreciate you sharing your perspective ❤️
What a great way to build community too! Moms are the foundation, heart and soul of society ❤
I love that you called your grandfather. I love and miss my pappy every day. 💔 so sweet that you have that relationship with him. Continue to cherish it. I also am a stay at home mom of 3 boys and I homeschool. I know the feeling of feeling alone! Thanks for sharing 💜
I so do... I call him every couple of weeks. It's such a gift! Thank you for being here.. for commenting and sharing a little bit of your story. I hope you enjoy my content ❤️
My mother got my sister and me cleaning from the age of 7. We loved it because we felt grown up and we were halping Mummy. The things we learned have served us well.
This made me smile. It's so sweet to hear your perspective of helping your mom. What a gift! Thank you for sharing ❤️
Thank you for these advices! I love that they come to life again. I raised my Children in the 90th - from 1988 onwards and had 4 children - and often had trouble making other people realize that I never neglected them (climbing trees- actually quite little ones, either me or my husband could lend them a hand if it needed to be) but the people thought otherwise and sometimes argued nastily, until one of the children got hurt, ran up to me and I snuggled them like they had to be comforted to being able to run off again- often after 10 seconds- then these people walked away silently. there was never a major injury though it well could have happen, it was more that my children got sure of what they were able to do and which actions were dangerous and better not done. - This parenting of having trust in the children , especially the little ones from Baby up to 5 years it is quite easy to do and does the least harm and they will be able to transform the skills they learned at that young age into their childhood steps with rather few guide lines. --But as important as that is be always in reach (doing your own things) for the child if it needs you and then be fully aware of the grief of the child. that is most important take your child in earnest (I don`t remember if that is the right word in English, because I am Deutsche).To All of you I wish a fulfilling and blooming life!!!!
Gosh.. thank you for taking the time to comment!! I know this is going to encourage so many mothers. I appreciate your thoughts and wisdom ❤️
22:13 simplicity parenting is the most influential parenting book I've read! Love it!
Gosh it's sooooo fulll of knowledge! Thank you for sharing ❤️
I do not have kids yet, but have looked forward to the day since I was a little kid myself!! I love learning about these things in my waiting and preparing my heart and discovering what my values are and what might work for our future family. I love these ideas about falling back to what was done before and finding that balance with it and today. The idea about having specific meals on specific days and sort of having a rotation and hearing your girls enjoy that is so cool and sweet! I enjoy learning about minimalism as well. Having less can be so freeing. Its still something i continuously have to work on. I still have a lot of stuff and need to declutter regularly. In preparation for children though, my husband and I have gradually shifted our expenses towards bills and debt and saving versus spending on random wants that we can honestly live without. I would much rather have a better quality home with space for a growing family rather than cramming the house full of all our "wants" that in the end hold way less value. Thanks for sharing!! I definitely want to come back to this later as a reminder as I get closer to the day of having my first little one! Praying you and your family are blessed and doing well!!
I love that you are not a mama yet, but you are starting think about how you want to show up as a mom!! Thank you for being here.. and I hope you continue to enjoy my channel ❤️
I need this reassurance ,thank you so much . I feel we all sometimes think that Just being a dedicated Sahm is not enough when it’s more than enough if not vital in a healthy home
It is absolutely vital!! I'm glad you felt reassure and encouraged. Thank you so much for taking the time to comment. ❤️
I am a mom of 4 child ages 2, 4, 6, 8. We are homeschooling. It is HARD with the two littlest ones. But, we all grow day by day. My oldest is able to help her little sister to read directions if I have to step away together something or he'll a young one. Take it day by day and even hour by hour. ♡
I appreciate you sharing this. My girls are 2 and 4.. and I am starting to see a glimpse of less "demand" for needing me. I love that your oldest is able to help her little sister. I'm hopeful that my girls will be that way. We want more kiddos and it's moms like you that encourage me that when that day comes.. it won't be nearly as impossible to survive as it feels. Also.. love that you homeschool. It's our first year and I'm loving it!!!! ❤️
Girl I’ve got 5,
Ages 12, 10, 7, 5, and 2…. And you find ways to make it work, but you’re right, take it day by day, make the choice to enjoy these short years.. and be kind to yourself and your kids AND your spouse…
And never actually stop… slow down and breathe… but don’t stop otherwise you’ll realize how tired you actually are 😂
@@dominiquejones1091 This had me laughing.. "never actually stop.. slow down and breathe.. but don't stop" hahahah too funny!! Thank you for being here ❤
I have 4 children ages 6, 5, 3, 1 and a bunch of in the oven. I homeschool too. I don’t stop because if I do I will lose momentum if you know what I mean. I appreciate you sharing! It’s so easy for us to feel like we are alone.
Great tips! Creating safe indoor and outdoor spaces has helped my 4year old burn off energy. But I find I struggle the most with letting him do things himself because I don't feel like cleaning it up...but he gets so much satisfaction out of things like pouring his own milk, spreading peanut butter himself etc. He also loves baking and yes it makes a mess but it's a great way to learn basic measurements and to bond!
Hahah I'm giggling a little... this is so me... I see how happy this makes my kids and sometimes I'm just not in the mood to clean up messes. When I have capacity.. I so enjoy these moments with the kids. Thanks for sharing ❤️
I find myself being able to stay home next year and trying to slow down my life. I cannot wait. There will be sacrifices but I get to home with my children. Thank you for this!
Thank you for sharing!! How exciting to have the opportunity to stay home! What a gift. I just shared in another comment how there definitely is an adjustment period... it's hard... but as everyone navigates this change.. things will get easier. Thanks for being here ❤️
I’m a brand new SAHM it has been an honor to tend to my home my children are ages 13,4& 2 ….. i’ve had to Shake off the mentality of societal expectations / standards 😅 it was a tough transition for sure . Even weaning myself from social media … 1 hr a day on your phone = to 15 days in a year 🤯 15 days to have done better things w my time ❤😊
Awww this is so exciting!!! I'm so happy that you are here at the beginning of your journey. You are so right about societal expectations and standards. It's rough. It's normal to have a transition period... and it be difficult. Doesn't mean you don't love it.. I look at it as an adjustment period. Thank you for being here and taking the time to comment ❤️
I agree with the slow parenting. Involved, responsible & free. On the note of the medical field trying to educate patients, An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.
Love this!! I do feel in my personal experience, that when the intuition is lost for mothers this is detrimental to the child's growth and development. Coming from a medically complex mama, I feel that we are not educated on how to do this safely. Fear and scarcity is used instead. So many other countries do a MUCH better job at keeping the mother/child relationship at the forefront of importance.. while educated on how to do so safely. Thank you for sharing ❤
Much love from a stay at home mom from Germany ❤
I love this!!! Thank you for sharing where you are from.. This made me smile big time!
Families working together at dinner. I really enjoy my children voluntarily coming in to assist with meal prep😊❤ also makes them more likely to try new foods ect Great discussion 😊❤🎉🎉
YESSSS!!! I love that you mentioned how they are more likely to try new foods. This helped my particular eater try different foods. Thanks for sharing ❤️
I am raising my granddaughter. In my childhood I spent weekends with my grandparents or my aunt. That seems to be a thing of the past. I also had few toys and my granddaughter has mostly imaginative things she can play with, and not very many of those. That way she is not overwhelmed and neither are we. Plus, I include her my homemaking activities and she loves this. Nice video. Thank you.
Wow isn't that so interesting. I'm curious how old you were when you spent weekends with your grandparents/aunts? It does feel like it wan't that long ago when this was normal. I hope I can be that grandma for my grandbabies someday!! Thank you for taking the time to comment ❤️
Nice video, good stuff!! As a fellow stay at home parent who rarely gets to hear other adults smh lol I actually clicked on you as background noise as a break from hearing my kiddos. but I found myself agreeing and talking back to you on the screen saying girl yessss on literally all of your habits 😂… safe freedom in my home is called ‘DSS’ and it drives my mom and aunts crazy 😆 they say I scare the byjesus outta them 😌 but hey it’s important I think for my daughters to learn to do dangerous stuff in a safe environment where I’m nearby if needed. It builds confidence 💪🏽. Plus it’s fun to watch.. 😌
I'm so glad that you clicked on this video!!! I laughed as you said it drives your mom and aunts crazy haha. I think our parents generation isn't quite as comfortable with safe freedom. But what a gift you are giving your daughter by helping her to learn how to do things in a safe environment!! I'm so glad you are here ❤️
New to the channel and I really, really enjoyed!! Both you and the info are very refreshing!!
I'm so glad you are here!! I hope you continue enjoying my content in the future ❤️
Thank you for this video! It’s simple advice, I think my family follows a lot of it already because I take a lot of parenting advice from my mom and grandma. (Who were both working moms also).
I’m a working mom but I also watch a bunch of these stay at home mom videos because we all go through the same thing! I don’t think this video is stay at home mom specific.
Thank you for your comment!! I do agree.. it's definitely not just for Stay-at-Home moms. I appreciate you being here and I hope you continue enjoying my channel!!
You’re speaking to my soul with this video. Keep it up mama!!! ❤
Thank you!!! I'm so glad that it resonated with you.. I hope you continue enjoying my content ❤️
Can you talk more about your dinner schedule? I have a four year old who is a picky eater. We just started doing family style serving and that has helped. We aren't really routine people and the thought of having to make generally the same things on specific days would be an adjustment.
Absolutely!! I love to meal prep the first week in the month. I make a different meal every night... but I make 4x the amount on the recipe, so I can freeze the rest for the remaining 3 weeks in the month. I typically change out 2-3 of our weekly meals each month, so we don't get bored of the meals. I hope this makes sense. There are so many ways to meal prep though.. and I'm definitely not an expert in that department haha
Great video! I use to be very vigilant about keeping my home childproof/child friendly. It used to blow my mind when I would go to my sister's house and she'd have scissors on the counter, no covers on her electrical outlets, leaving water in her bathtub etc..to me, she seemed to lack the ability to foresee danger. The worst was how these things would lead to the child getting screamed at. Ex: Mom leaves the scissors out, then child cuts her hair and gets yelled at. I'm thnking why were scissors even within reach? I feel like there are certain common sense equations Kid+Scissors=bad haircut/bald dog. hahaha.
I have an 8 month old and as she gets more mobile I am very curious how to include her in tasks around the house. I came from a home where I was either given chores or not included at all so that my mom could get things done easier. When I became an adult I realized I didn’t even know how to do some things and had to teach myself. I want my daughter to go out into the world knowing basic domestic skills.
I really appreciate this question! I'm thinking of doing a whole video on it. But in the mean time, you may enjoy Hunt. Gather. Parent!! It's such a good starting point. Hope this helps!!!
I am 10 months ahead of you with my 18 month old. She loves to hand me dishes out of the dishwasher, add ingredients while I'm cooking, or wipe off the counter. I got a learning tower for the kitchen, it is great. Anything that I am doing, I try to find some part she can do. She has always surprised me, she is capable earlier than I expected. She's no good at folding clothes, but she loves to help with everything. 😂
@@alexishancock7930 Thank you for commenting and sharing this! It's so helpful to hear how mamas get their kiddos involved. I really appreciate you taking the time to share ❤
@@slowishparentingyou might include teaching your teenagers to grocery shop. My mom taught me how but most of my friends in college didn’t know what to do.
I'd start with laundry. Sorting the clothes into colours (learning colours), loading and unloading the machine (we have front loaders in the UK so this is easy for a small child, maybe harder with a top loader). Then folding and putting away. Xx
This was a great video thank you
Especially loved that you talked to your grandpa about this. Makes me as a 26 year old feel connected to a distant generation.
I know this feeling. My grandfather is the only grandparent I have left!!! and I feel so grateful to be able to have these conversations. Thank you for sharing ❤️
When my grandpa would see my daughter (his great-granddaughter) putting something into her mouth off the floor he’d say, “You eat a peck of dirt before you die. So she might as well get it over with!” 😂
My grandma said this too!!! Too funny 😂
Agreeeeed!!!!!❤❤
Love this! ❤
Thank you!! I’m glad it resonated with you!
Do you have more examples of responsibility they can do? My daughter is 3 and I’m always surprised as to what she is capable of but, looking for some ideas?
@@sarahjc9641 I love this! There was a comment thread that someone started in here about this. But, I’m thinking of doing an upcoming video on it.
My girls are 2 + 4, today we had a laundry party… they sorted out their clothes. The oldest attempted to fold hers.. the littlest just matched socks.
Loading the dishwasher, loading laundry, washing floors, feeding the dog, making the bed, helping set the table for meals.
I never expect them to do chores, but they come alongside me when they are wanting to.
Sometimes I do ask for help, but my intention is to teach in that moment… so I’m not frustrated when it doesn’t happen or they need some reminders to follow through.
My 4 year old has become quite consistent in wanting to feed the dog and throwing her pjs in the laundry basket.
Hopefully some other moms come in with ideas.. this would be helpful as I’m creating some content ❤️
I was going to comment the same. My mom did all of these then transitioned some of them to designated chores once we were 5 or 6. Laundry in particular while I didn't start doing "mine" until my teens mom made sure both me and my brother understood sorting, running the machines, and putting away (honestly the hardest part sometimes lol) from a young age, sometimes assigning us to go do a family load as young as about 8 (we didn't separate people's stuff till teens)
Sooo helpful
I'm so glad!! Thank you for taking the time to comment ❤️
I think the worst part is and probably the main reason more moms are working outside of the home these days is because everything costs so much and it is difficult to live on one income, Not to mention divorce rates have skyrocketed as well so that creates a one-income household with no other parent to provide. But then there are also those people who live way over their means; buying a new fancy car or a big fancy house, expensive fast fashion, etc.
I appreciate you taking the time to comment. I hope you know this video was not at all intended to hurt working moms. Every mom and family has a reason for what they have chosen for their family. My heart in creating this video was to be an encouragement for the SAHMs.. because it feels like there aren't many of us. Thank you for watching and I so hope you enjoy this community ❤
Thank you so much! I’m saving this video to come back to often! New subscriber! ❤ I have three kids (10, 3 and 1) and am working on how I speak to and treat my kids. 😊
I'm sorry this took so long for me to respond. Somehow, I missed a few comments over the last week. Anyways I just wanted to welcome you to the community!! I'm so glad to have you ❤️
Agree 100%
Thank you for the reassurance ❤️
ah, there's so many old fashioned things I'd love to see come back! but the question people should ponder is why did it stop? It worked so well IF people got the ideal cards dealt to them, but sadly, financial abuse was a factor in why it wasn't working for women. Then there weren't many options open for women...so women's lib came about to help those people, but then every woman started jumping on board and then respect was lost for the homemaker. We need to bring back respect and understanding of the importance of the lifestyle. People now-a-days are having kids just to pay strangers to raise them. It's sad and dangerous for our society.
Women's lib convinced women (w/all sorts of stories-- little truths, big manipulations) to enter the workforce to become "valuable". WHY??
Bc lenders, banks, & IRS etc. saw an enormous opportunity to capitalize on taxes from two incomes & debt from the brainwashing consumerism. ALL at the expense of children, marriages, families, culture, and environment.
(Now, they sell us all the "fixes". 🙄)
When we were young we could see how *some* things worked but as we got older, lots of parts came together & the picture became very clear.
I'm not convinced we're better off.
YESSS. Why did it stop?? That's a questions I ponder often. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!!! ❤️
You answered your own question with that last sentence.
Simply put, no respect for motherhood leads to families falling apart (or never being made in the first place) which weakens our society and means less humans. I definitely oversimplified this but that's the gist. Tons and tons and TONS of stuff out there to explain it further.
Becouse we dont have many kids anymore, as a stay at home mums especially comumnity os very important. Befor houses were maybe living far apart and having 5 plus kods was a norm. Today we need more community and since mums like me moved countries and left our families to start own, feel a deep gap there. And many mums I know in the same situation. Also mums are not being paid. I mean of course, and avatage husbands can not give their wife a salary. But my good husband covers all the essentials. Bit kids at the certain age need extracuricural activities and other things too. Its gets too expensive gor one midlle class pay
I so get that! Thanks so much for sharing ❤️
Good video! I just don’t understand the safe space. Do you mean you child proofed your daughter’s room so she cannot get hurt?
@@Joni.Johnson this is a great question! Yes, some childproofing (lock on the closet + dresser drawers, outlet plugs). Along with anchoring big furniture pieces (especially as I began to move into the rest of our home).. But more like decluttering and making the space very minimalistic.. so she could play safely without fear of getting hurt or making a mess!
Janet Lansbury talks about a Yes space and I think she does a beautiful job of explaining it!
@@slowishparenting Thank you
❤❤❤❤
Glad you enjoyed!!
I wish you would have closed with the staying at home statistic because I want to click off not but haven’t seen the rest of the info. As part of the 70-something percent that may want to incorporate the tips… not the way to start
I’m sorry you felt that way and that the statistic triggered you! My heart was to encourage Stay-at-Home Moms.. and didn’t intend for working mamas to watch. Of course many of these tips can be implemented by all mamas.. but in the last few months, I’ve found myself wanting to create a space for SAHM. It just feels like there aren’t many of us. I appreciate you sharing this feedback.. and I hope you know I understand and respect your decision to work! Thanks for sharing ❤️
I don't work full time but I do work outside of the home and realize at least by old standards would be considered working outside the home. I didn't find it offensive. ❤ and I appreciated the video and pray to be sahm in the near future
Cost of living makes it difficult to live on one income these days.
@@brandihurd8374 it absolutely does make it hard. It’s a sacrifice for sure. I’ve found myself feeling the financial burden in the last couple of years, with all my daughter’s medical bills. But, for our family, it felt like a sacrifice we were willing to make 😊