Heartfelt compassion for your situation, not that it necessarily helps you. Glad you were able to learn to value yourself in the way you could have. I believe that self-psychological achievement is no easier than external achievement that society and peers validate us for, and yet deserves validation just like external achievement does!
Oh my I'm 63 and was unwanted there are so many of us. I think a major factor causing this is our financial system. Not in every case but many it's so hard to afford and take care of kids.
I'm 37 and I'm learning to want myself. The hardest part is letting someone else see this mess I've been in, and waiting and hoping and waiting and hoping that they'll see the work I'm doing to get out of it before they give up on me. Thankfully, a few aren't going *anywhere* right now. One of those being someone so much more important to me than I ever anticipated them being. I'm just having to take this one step, one day at a time.
Yes when a woman has a child she needs a mother too and the society doesn't support her they take the child just like well I don't want to go and know it @@JustCallMeLiberty
1- trying not to think about something 2- trying to make yourself go to sleep 3- ignore your own needs when life get really busy 4- trying to be happy 5- trying to make everybody happy 6- trying to make people love you or like you.
I hope u get the chance to read this Dr. Scott. I need to thank you. I’m 44 years old and for as long as I can remember I have been super depressed. Every morning I would wake up I would be sore, angry, miserable, etc… I’m a huge caffeine addict to put it lightly. Probably drank as much as 1000mg daily on a lite day because I couldn’t get rid of that tiredness you feel in your soul as u would say. One of your videos resonated with me where u explained how caffeine only borrows energy from a later part in the day and that if u have caffeine in your system when u go to bed, your quality of sleep isn’t going to be good. U also explained that u can’t use caffeine to get rid of the tired feeling u get from being in a depressive state where u always feel fatigued. For as long as I can remember I would wake up and NEVER feel refreshed no matter how long I slept. Not once can I remember feeling good when I woke up. So I decided to try not having coffee anytime after 10:00 am (4 hours after waking) like u said and man did I feel the difference. For the 1st time in decades I had energy at the end of the day. So much so that I even found it harder to fall asleep. The best part was I woke up and felt great. You really have a fantastic way of getting information through to people and I can say you have helped me out tremendously. I k ow you must have been through this because u explain the feeling so perfectly. On top of being awake throughout the day, it’s even diminishing my depression. So I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart. You saved my life. Please don’t stop what you’re doing because you are helping so many people. Best psychologist I’ve found in the 30 some years I’ve been searching. Thank you SOOOO much!!!
I’m really happy for you. I adore his Chanel too. If you have problem with tiredness please check out Glucose Goddess | Jessie Inchauspé, (Biochemist) and learn about jumps of glucose on wellbeing, check her Chanel or any podcast, maybe her website/book. She didn’t come up with her technique, but she explains it really well. So basically jumps of sugar are damaging to your mood, energy and hunger. So some of her tips: 1) eat savory breakfast low carb 2) eat before every meal any low starch vegetable, it’s really important to it at the beginning 3) eat your meals this sequence - vegetables, protein/fat/, carbs, desert 4) No sweet snacks - even fruits, eat it after meal. And some more, you can check them tourself. And good news for you, it’s more helpful for your wellbeing to drink coffee after your breakfast. 🤝
It’s better to drink coffee after savory low carb breakfast, Glucose Goddess has more info about insulin resistance and mood swings. Wish you the best ❤
For some of us who literally can't afford good quality and consistent therapy, Dr. Scott's videos fills in those gaps. Life changing videos with in depth information! Very much appreciated!!
Having OCD is a living hell. It reminds you of the bad things you've done, creates false memories, makes you feel miserable all the time. You go over the event again and again and again like a hamster on a wheel. And that leads to the second mistakevyou mentioned: trying to make myself fall asleep. I feel so bad about those thoughts and memories that I dont feel like eating and so I spend the whole day without habing a decent meal.
Those of us with neurodiverse minds struggle with negative emotional stimulation, loud noises, rumination, etc. Many things stress us out. So, many of us try to help others to distract ourselves from the madness. This is how we manage to miss out on meeting our own needs. It's a crazy cycle. This is an excellent video.
I had decided to put away my hobbies and act like an adult. I am 65, with a 32 yr old autistic son and I take care of my 87 year old mother. I have decided to upgrade my hobbies, guilt free. Thank you!
I am thinking of joining Dr. Scott's channel for a cupla months (may not be able to afford it EVERY month) am a 66-year-old grandmother - different generation/ different culture - but EVERYTHING he says really resonates - and he does without worsening the huge burden of guilt/ self-blame/ despair i already carry! His stuff on Anhedonia is just brilliant (i will to re-listen because i have ALREADY forgotten - my present memor problems are most likely due to chronic insomnia, the type that he describes to a T as a "lifestyle choice" because night-times are the only truly stress-free times when the rest of the (very-hurtful human race) is asleep 😔 i need to be asleep too!!
Reminding myself that ‘happiness’ is an emotion - like anger, like sadness, like excitement - and not some nebulous state of being that lingers as a goal, has helped so, so much. For a long time I saw happiness as the opposite of depression, and as depression can be a default state for long stretches of time, then happiness must work like that too - and it doesn’t. Being present when happiness happens - helping a friend, a moment of accomplishment, good news - makes it shine like a little flashlight in the darkness. Great video, thank you so much for making these. They help more than you know.
i wonder sometimes, besides general attitudes in america, how much having "pursuit of happiness" be apart of the declaration of independence messes with our heads from the second we can even understand what the concept of happiness is. it's written as an unalienable right. that we have a /right/ to be happy. pair that with the human struggle to experience happiness amongst all forms of grief and hardship, i can see how we all become obsessed with it. if it's my right, then why aren't i happy?
@@eg4441 I’m Canadian, so I the constitution of the US didn’t come into play in my experience - that being said, I do wonder if it messes with Americans. Doesn’t it say ‘life, liberty and the *pursuit* of happiness?’ In which case, it doesn’t say you have a right to happiness, just that you’re free to pursue it. Which I would think seems like an unattainable thing. If we did it with another emotion, it’d make less sense - ‘go find anger’, or ‘go find surprise’. As those are individual to each person, there is no one way to go about it. No ‘this is what happiness is, these are the steps, go’. I could be wrong, it’s late and I’m tired.
Re "the pursuit of happiness" Our Lady said to St. Bernadette (in one of her apparitions at Lourdes) "i cannot promise to make you happy in this life, only in the next." So (as a Catholic) that American Dream called "the pursuit of happiness" always seemed unreal? selfish? unattainable? Surely happiness is something that happens (occasionally) while doing something else? And we only realize what happiness is when we've lost it? And then we grieve for something/ someone in our past that "made us happy" while forgetting all the negative aspects of that past situation - and, even worse - we forget to remind ourselves - if we knew how to be happy once, maybe we can be happy again? That's the problem though, isn't it? We can't be happy just because we WANT to be, it is elusive and more likely to happen if we forget about it and do other things - especially do things for other people... Then, if we are lucky, that person will be happy and maybe they will smile at us/ with us? Now - THAT is a spark of happiness!! 😊
YES DO A PART 2! The last part of: Being that person that everyone wants you to be, is exactly what I struggle THE most dealing with depression! When I make new friends (or even date), and the friendship is moving up to a good friend or dating getting serious, I struggle with: When to tell them I have depression. I've had WAY too many friendships and relationships end because they tell me they "can't handle the depression." As a result, I feel too diseased and unlovable.😔
The last 3 - 8 minutes of this video helped me understand why I've always felt "unloved" by the guys I've dated/married. You have no idea what an epiphany this is for me! Listening to your videos has helped me so much! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! Please never stop publishing content! You get me without even knowing me!
Or say the Rosary 🙏🏻 or the Divine Mercy Chaplet - THAT particular prayer i find especially helpful, for some reason, it can stop the awful crying-fits which sometimes attack me at night, they are part of my depressive mood-swings and they are... AWFUL. But when i can concentrate sufficiently to say the Divine Mercy Chaplet, truly it never fails. Believe me, it is more than a placebo effect. And for those who don't believe in it, well, all i can say is - it works for me and it can't do any harm - problem is: i forget to say it or i forget the words or - the hurt feelings are so overpowering they intrude into my prayer-time 🙄 God! I can bw such a sad case!
I found your channel when I was looking for some solace from a broken relationship. I invested much emotion into the other person. I tried to be a person that they loved. At first it worked well, but two years later, that person broke the promise I asked of them. I walked away realizing that this person did not care for me or love me enough not to hurt me in such a devastating way. It hurt a lot. I’ve had Bipolar Disorder for years, and I spiraled into a depression episode. Your video clips are great advice and they have saved me, especially when I had to wait for so long for a session with my psychiatrist or therapist. Now I’ve got stronger and the pain has lessened. It doesn’t stop altogether, but I'm on my way to recovery. I can't thank you enough, Dr. Scott.
Thanks for these tip's. I will be working on the sleep + happiness tip's. As soon as I lay down my mind goes into thoughts of things that my parents did or said to me. I grew up in a narcissistic household. I'm now 67 and my parent have been gone some 30+ years. Regarding love, the biggest love has come from my cats. From the age of 26 until 7 months ago when my cat Rocky passed at 19, the biggest love has been from my cats and I now miss that immensely. My career involved working with folks with disabilities including autism which has brought happiness to me. Thanks again for your help, appreciate every word!
Dr. Scott, thank you for faithfully continuing to put up these videos. I know it’s a lot of work, but you are making a difference. I lost my husband to suicide a year and a half ago and lost my insurance at the same time. There just isn’t money for a good therapist, right when I need it most. Your videos are a lifeline.
54 seconds in and I already feel so seen. I'm glad I'm not alone in the thought that the human brain responds to 'brute force' with resistance and regression. I thought it was just me for the longest time. xD No matter how many times I tried doing something I didn't want to, I always found that my brain would just say "NO." and just stop everything and reduce me to a motionless lump.
100% Spot on! Thanks! Two years ago I finally found a solution for my problem of mind racing instead of falling asleep, and falling back to sleep from night terror dreams: I listen to audio books on my kindle with an automatic turn off in 30 minutes. By concentrating on the story I swear I automatically fall asleep within 5-10 minutes...every time! I had to keep at it at first but it got easier over time. I place my kindle under my pillow so it is somewhat muted and doesn't fall off the bed. For the first time in my life (I'm 62) I am sleeping 7-8 hours a night. Hope this helps others!
I have made this comment numerous times. I have to again. If it wasn’t for Dr Scott, I’d continue to believe what others try to tell me “humm…no one else has those issues”. And again- why are no other professionals opening the door(s) on this (mental health).
Hi, my name is Steven, and I'm addicted to over thinking. When I can't sleep I'll just say, screw-it, if I'm going to be awake I might as well learn something so I read a book. After maybe a paragraph or two...knocks me right out. For me, trying to be happy is inauthentic but I can get to being neutral.
Hi, Steven. I like this strategy, and used to incorporate reading into my bedtime routine. Now, I am struggling because I no longer wish to go outside, get in the car, and drive to the library. Or the grocery store. Or anywhere except to work. I understand the neutral feeling. Take care.
Good morning. I lost my husband April 28 after 3 years of battling ALS, and I have been trying to get my life back on track ever since. I do not have any energy and most of the time I have no motivation to do anything. I am alone and I have been going to therapy and taking Prozac but I’m not making much headway. I have always been a very active person and had many projects going at same time, now NOTHING. my question is what else can I do to improve my energy? I do force myself to walk 30 minutes Monday through Friday but then I came home and sleep for 2 hours. I’m afraid I’m sinking into a dark hole that I might not be able to come back from. Thank you very much.
Be ok with yourself. You're still mourning and that's a huge shift from going from a caretaker to being alone. Don't be so hard on yourself. It's ok to reset yourself. I'm so sorry for your loss, it's devastating.
Your energy is low to let you mourn. Respect your energy. Go with it. You are not sinking into a dark hole, you are mourning the death of your husband. Stock up on frozen food and easy to prepare food and just give yourself forty days of mourning. Give yourself permission to surrender to the grief for those 40 days. Then take it from there. Pray for your husband's soul each day for those forty days. Ritualise your forty days of mourning.
I don't want you to take this wrong way Scott. I took a massive break from trying to fix myself as it was making me feel worse and more under pressure. I just let all my thoughts and feelings come and go at there own pace. Sure it's not been great all of the time. But I've generally been better just allowing my thoughts and feelings to be. I thought now was the time to try out some new techniques but I now feel like its making me fall into that horrible place again. I just cant do therapy without getting obsessed with fixing it all. What advice can you give me
It's surprising how often we fall into these traps-like overthinking, self-criticism, or unrealistic expectations-without even realizing it. By identifying these mental pitfalls, we can take proactive steps to shift our mindset and improve our overall well-being. This exploration serves as a valuable reminder that much of our unhappiness stems from within, and by changing how we think, we can significantly enhance our quality of life. It’s an insightful reflection on the power of mindset in shaping our happiness.
Your thoughts on happiness remind me of a saying "Happiness is like a butterfly. The more you chase it the more it will evade you. But if you notice the other things around you, it will gently come and sit on your shoulder. "
Trying to make multiple children happy will drive you crazy. I used to drive through both Wendy's and McDonald's to please each child. My Mom would cook a meal and it was either take it or leave it. If you left it, you went to bed hungry. She did not cater to you or care...and I survived.
My wonderful mother was a people pleaser. She’d go many places. I am sorry now I was such a brat. I wish she had put her foot down and said “We are having XYZ. There are fruit and veggies in the fridge too if you don’t like XYZ. Have a salad or be hungry. Up to you.”
I heard a long time ago that you should have high expectations, but suffering disappointment when things don't go the way you had hoped. Low expectations is not a hopeless attitude, it's a reality check. When something positive happens, the joy and blessing gives me a boost.
Hello Scott thankyou. I get alot from your work and videos. I have trouble with my mind. I have cptsd. I try so hard to overcome my different improper upbringing. I feel betrayed and unhappy heart problems. I have counselling but sleep badly. I am on anti depressants (tricyclic type) Thankyou.....KB UK x The rioting in the UK has been abit much , maybe you saw our News.😮
Overloading myself with responsibility was my main problem for years. I was always expected to show up and be "functioning" at family gatherings until I couldn't anymore. Once I declined more invitations, I realized that there were a lot of responsibilities I thought people had and while it is kind of heartbreaking to not attend and no one missing you, it's also very freeing - And most people that ARE annoyed when I take time for myself don't dare to complain to me about it :)
Dr. Eilers - your shampoo bottle example was good, but I quickly found a way to outsmart my mind by playing my mind on game, where in I imagined myself, throwing away an empty bottle of shampoo into the garbage where I couldn’t see it, because it was gone, or used up, and it worked until you kept mentioning it over and over and over again for the next three minutes and so I couldn’t get out my mind because I appearing you talk about it. That was kind of unfair to challenge people to not think about the shampoo bottle, even if the challenge was indirect, but then keep mentioning and mentioning mentioning. I feel like the technique I developed on the fly was actually a good one and was working well, but was kind of sabotaged inadvertently
To distract my mind from negative thoughts, my sister suggested I hum a tune...anything will do. She said that the mind can then only concentrate on the tune, and not the negative thought(s).
Thank you Dr Scott I just started listening to you a few days ago and your the first doctor first person to make since out of all of this. My life has been one uncertain experience after another and everyone from psychiatrists to narcotics anonymous to religious people have any idea how to answer my questions I’m just another number on meds or another addict loser who can’t get it together I know this real I hope it’s ok just wanted you to know how nice it is to have you talking to us I would love to talk to you if that is at all possible thank you Christina D
The best way for me to fall asleep is to put on a boring video with a soothing voice and engage my mind with it. It causes your brain to follow rule 1. Thanks for the video Dr Scott 😂
@@lisakrushinski9436 I see it the opposite way lol, happiness is a state of being where you're fully aligned and connected to the divine (Jesus in your case), but joy is a temporary emotion that comes from like going to an amusement park.
Don't ask your kids to decide . Surprise them with your own satisfaction avoid squabbling 😊 They are kids still learning show them you are gently taking charge 😊
I think the 'income' model reminds me that I'm just so effing tired of trying to try. For me, the gathering of the income does little more than wear me out so much that I can't enjoy any of that security. But maybe I'm more busted than most.
I am the Caretaker of my Husband diagnosed with Early Onset Alziemers Dementia. I try to make sure to care for him more than myself, I was prescribed Seroquel for sleep years ago I usually can't fall asleep without it because it knocks me out, but I usually don't get quality sleep anyways cause I'm right in the Middle of Menapause, get nightsweasts alot. I take Progesterone only can't have estrogen because I Smoke, I guess there's a danger of blood Clots. I try my best to pray and leave things to God and not Worry it's difficult though.
if you ever need assistance with caring for him you should seek it out. you deserve to be healthy just as much as he deserves to be cared for. let the bad days be bad and the good days be good. wishing the both of you peace. the world is tough, even in good circumstances
@aylen3322 Wow!! That's interesting 🤔 I know Strokes are caused by Blood Clots, but it's Blood Clots My Doctor said is the issue, I'm trying to get a new PCP because my current one won't treat me with Medications that I want to try for different issues I have, and I feel like he talks to me like I'm a Child and I'm Way, Way Older Than Him!! I Can't Stand Doctor's they seem to have a God Complex, like I don't know my body and what I need at 51 Years Old. Thank You for the Tip I will Check into it.
Hello doctor. I am trying to fight through depression. I need your advice. I am kind of envying you because yiu have an understanding wife and two kids. My husband is not mentally compatible with me and i have been trying to concieve for 12 years so that my only daughter may have a sibling and i have two kids. I am grateful for what i have but the impossiblity of having mentally compatible husband and the overwheming feeling that i am getting too old with decreased chances of pregnancy are not letting me breath freely. Please guide what perspective or technique may help me. Please respond....
I remember being told to force myself to be happy or to go to sleep right away, and I'd always get frustrated when it never worked. Or I would mask being happy and then break down without realizing why. It's tough work to be happy. To be happy naturally or fall asleep naturally is a long process that can't be rushed. No matter how much we're told by advertisers or authority figures that we can magically become happy if we buy XYZ. I really want to be happy, but i can't force it. It's just a thing that'll happen naturally as long as I can take care of myself and have the resources around me to do so
It would be great if you did a video on "masking". I believe I'm on the autism spectrum. Have not been officially diagnosed; too expensive is what I'm told. How can I have healthy relationships "out in the world" without masking? Thanks again, Dr. Scott.
What I love about your stuff boils down to one word: nuance. Almost every doctor representing Western medicine should be ashamed of how they see mental health treatment and the respective individuals with various complex disorders.
@@janicesitzes241 You tell yourself it's the new normal and you adapt accordingly. You learn all you can about your illness and you become an expert on it. You accept that some friends will fall away and others will come into your life. You join support groups or create them for that illness. You become a crusader for people with your illness and you create your community.
@@sagsunlibrarisingvirgomoon3007 Horoscopes are the occult. Forbidden as demonic by the Catholic church. Just a heads up. You are inviting demons into your life with Tarot etc.
Working harder just makes life worse for me. Hard work just creates new problems for me. I don’t understand why. I acknowledge I’m in the minority here with this.
Minority or not, you are not alone. I was told for decades to do that. That I am a lazy useless person, because not doing whatever, fill in blank. CPTSD here, now 74. With sleep apnea since childhood. I was physically exhausted, in pain from waking with a hypoxic headache. Every day. It wasn't even diagnosed for 50 years. So no, I COULD NOT do more. "Guilty." And it's a lie.
@@CM-jb7fs isn't that just social programming? and like a mindset thing? like you grew up seeing people complain about how some activity is annoying and so you just automatically decided to feel the same way without giving it a chance?
I really want to set up a routine for myself that will work. but it's hard I am in recovery from schizoaffective disorder bipolar type. My mind thinks deep about everything and tries to complicate things. I know why I do it I felt dumb as a kid growing up and I always want to prove my intelligence now. but I'm always tense and anxious, I know my thoughts are generally causing this and I think it has to do with my core beliefs which are negative. I spent years glued to a screen reading about everything ok wikis, websites, TH-cam, etc. because I felt like I was stupid and my condition made me think I needed to "catch up." well all this obsessing backfired I messed up my brain I don't remember what it feels like to have a healthy routine. I hardly remember what it feels like for my body to feel healthy inside. I think I mixed myself up doing really unhealthy habits and doing things sporadically for years. I'm not sure if I can ever feel healthy again....
So you are saying when I try so hard to get back on my track I keep steering through the shrubbery? I stress myself with the hardcore wish to get better - makes sense. Reminds me of the concept of "Wu Wei" - to use "no force". But I didn't connected it to my "positive" intentions....yet.
Me being the only male in the home, I get no personal time, I am not allowed self care, hobbies are not allowed, Its been 7 years and I can't even think about it. Every moment of my day is full of everyone else, so I sit here in bed trying to research what else is wrong with me while trying to fall asleep. It's depressing.
Psychedelics definitely have potential to deal with mental health symptoms like anxiety and depression, I would like to try them again but it's just so hard to source out here
I’ve been researching on psychedelics and it’s benefits to individuals dealing with Anxiety, Depression, ADHD and from my findings, they really work and I’ve been eager to get some for a while but its been difficult to get my hands on them.
The Trips I've been having really helped me a lot. I’m now able to meditate and I finally feel in control of my emotions and my future and things that used to be mundane to me now seem incredible and full of nuance on top of that I'm way less driven by my ego and I have alot more empathy as well
@@ThomasReinhardt773 I feel the same way too. I put too much on my plate and it definitely affects my stress and anxiety levels. I am also glad to be a part of this community.
well… I‘d guess the #3 (ignoring own needs) may even enact parasu!cidal tendencies, i.e. trying to be well in ‚wrong life‘ is perceived as incoherence of ‚gaslighting oneself‘ merely.
Sir this jayanti from India ,I am my master in psychology and I am a double master and undergo a PhD I want to work under your guidance Is this possible .
Anyone had thier lives completely devastated? Divorce, career job loss, deaths in the family etc.. >losing what made your own life and yourself full filled with joy, confidence and inspiration... to be completely shattered. Mentally stressed beyond your capacity? Causing Insomnia, crippling anxiety, PTSD and severe depression. Forced to dwell, ruminate on everything negative. Physical illnesses that paralyze you in constant pain, absolutely unable to do anything? .... 💔😣
I hope this is simple enough Happiness is sharing a deep belly laugh and watching others faces laugh in total happiness 😊 Happiness in life is not always a good belly laugh all the time . Laughter brings together all in harmony . Therefore they are content 😌
What do you do when you don't know who your authentic self is, because you lost it from changing faces so many times and are typically in a depressive state? I never feel "right" and constantly adjusting. I feel the most "real" when i'm angry or aggressive, but it feels wrong to lean into because it comes from a spiteful place. However i hold nothing back in that state and speak my mind no matter how hurtful it may be to others. I know people enjoy being around someone who smiles and is happy, but it feels exhausting to be that way. I actually have to use muscles just to keep smiling, and remind/convince myself to keep smiling and stay positive.
Dr. Scott ,Smart councel, yup to much, seems living on over load alot. 15 minute task goal working for procrastination, now😅 dont like feeling like ketsup..... Without meds my imagination station goes a bit sideways. Learned behavior like shame take energy. 😮Stand agreement depression is theft.
What if the thought we have is that some day I'm gonna die? It's a little frustrating and depressing having that all day, knowing I can't do nothing and being scared of it anyway. I've already been with 6 psychologist and the last one told me to find an spiritual guide (and I'm atheist 😅)
Not dismissing the value of this video by any means, just an additional aspect to point number 3: Dr. Scott might have a somewhat biased perception on this if he's using his experience with his clients as the basis for this particular advice. Because those people who come and see him are in the fortunate position to be able to afford therapy and are therefore also likely to have the kind of job or another source of money so that they don't have to worry about day-to-day financial survival. How is somebody going to prioritise themselves, their self-care, their hobbies if they are in a shitty job that pays them just enough after ungodly hours of work to be able to afford the next step up from living in a cardboard box on the street and the bare minimum of calories to not have their body disintegrate over time? We should always remember that there are also systemic aspects to our mental health.
76 years ago I was a unwanted child. It took 65 years to learn to value myself. thank you for this channel.
Heartfelt compassion for your situation, not that it necessarily helps you.
Glad you were able to learn to value yourself in the way you could have.
I believe that self-psychological achievement is no easier than external achievement that society and peers validate us for, and yet deserves validation just like external achievement does!
Oh my I'm 63 and was unwanted there are so many of us. I think a major factor causing this is our financial system. Not in every case but many it's so hard to afford and take care of kids.
I'm 37 and I'm learning to want myself. The hardest part is letting someone else see this mess I've been in, and waiting and hoping and waiting and hoping that they'll see the work I'm doing to get out of it before they give up on me. Thankfully, a few aren't going *anywhere* right now. One of those being someone so much more important to me than I ever anticipated them being. I'm just having to take this one step, one day at a time.
Yes when a woman has a child she needs a mother too and the society doesn't support her they take the child just like well I don't want to go and know it @@JustCallMeLiberty
I am so there with you!
1- trying not to think about something 2- trying to make yourself go to sleep 3- ignore your own needs when life get really busy 4- trying to be happy 5- trying to make everybody happy 6- trying to make people love you or like you.
🙏❗✌️
I hope u get the chance to read this Dr. Scott. I need to thank you. I’m 44 years old and for as long as I can remember I have been super depressed. Every morning I would wake up I would be sore, angry, miserable, etc… I’m a huge caffeine addict to put it lightly. Probably drank as much as 1000mg daily on a lite day because I couldn’t get rid of that tiredness you feel in your soul as u would say. One of your videos resonated with me where u explained how caffeine only borrows energy from a later part in the day and that if u have caffeine in your system when u go to bed, your quality of sleep isn’t going to be good. U also explained that u can’t use caffeine to get rid of the tired feeling u get from being in a depressive state where u always feel fatigued. For as long as I can remember I would wake up and NEVER feel refreshed no matter how long I slept. Not once can I remember feeling good when I woke up. So I decided to try not having coffee anytime after 10:00 am (4 hours after waking) like u said and man did I feel the difference. For the 1st time in decades I had energy at the end of the day. So much so that I even found it harder to fall asleep. The best part was I woke up and felt great. You really have a fantastic way of getting information through to people and I can say you have helped me out tremendously. I k ow you must have been through this because u explain the feeling so perfectly. On top of being awake throughout the day, it’s even diminishing my depression. So I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart. You saved my life. Please don’t stop what you’re doing because you are helping so many people. Best psychologist I’ve found in the 30 some years I’ve been searching. Thank you SOOOO much!!!
Yooo congrats!
I’m really happy for you. I adore his Chanel too. If you have problem with tiredness please check out Glucose Goddess | Jessie Inchauspé, (Biochemist) and learn about jumps of glucose on wellbeing, check her Chanel or any podcast, maybe her website/book. She didn’t come up with her technique, but she explains it really well.
So basically jumps of sugar are damaging to your mood, energy and hunger.
So some of her tips:
1) eat savory breakfast low carb
2) eat before every meal any low starch vegetable, it’s really important to it at the beginning
3) eat your meals this sequence - vegetables, protein/fat/, carbs, desert
4) No sweet snacks - even fruits, eat it after meal.
And some more, you can check them tourself.
And good news for you, it’s more helpful for your wellbeing to drink coffee after your breakfast. 🤝
🤙🤙@@letsreadtextbook1687
It’s better to drink coffee after savory low carb breakfast, Glucose Goddess has more info about insulin resistance and mood swings. Wish you the best ❤
Are you sure that did it.
I have been feeling down for many years now and suffer from similar conditions. Will cutting caffeine help in such a way????
For some of us who literally can't afford good quality and consistent therapy, Dr. Scott's videos fills in those gaps. Life changing videos with in depth information! Very much appreciated!!
Having OCD is a living hell. It reminds you of the bad things you've done, creates false memories, makes you feel miserable all the time. You go over the event again and again and again like a hamster on a wheel. And that leads to the second mistakevyou mentioned: trying to make myself fall asleep. I feel so bad about those thoughts and memories that I dont feel like eating and so I spend the whole day without habing a decent meal.
Those of us with neurodiverse minds struggle with negative emotional stimulation, loud noises, rumination, etc. Many things stress us out. So, many of us try to help others to distract ourselves from the madness. This is how we manage to miss out on meeting our own needs. It's a crazy cycle. This is an excellent video.
I have stopped helping people who are never there for me. Fuck them!
I had decided to put away my hobbies and act like an adult. I am 65, with a 32 yr old autistic son and I take care of my 87 year old mother. I have decided to upgrade my hobbies, guilt free. Thank you!
I seriously don't know how you're able to so consistently teach me something new about myself with each video you upload
The word Anhedonia was the gift Dr. Scott gave to me.
I am thinking of joining Dr. Scott's channel for a cupla months (may not be able to afford it EVERY month) am a 66-year-old grandmother - different generation/ different culture - but EVERYTHING he says really resonates - and he does without worsening the huge burden of guilt/ self-blame/ despair i already carry! His stuff on Anhedonia is just brilliant (i will to re-listen because i have ALREADY forgotten - my present memor problems are most likely due to chronic insomnia, the type that he describes to a T as a "lifestyle choice" because night-times are the only truly stress-free times when the rest of the (very-hurtful human race) is asleep 😔 i need to be asleep too!!
Free therapy lmao
Reminding myself that ‘happiness’ is an emotion - like anger, like sadness, like excitement - and not some nebulous state of being that lingers as a goal, has helped so, so much.
For a long time I saw happiness as the opposite of depression, and as depression can be a default state for long stretches of time, then happiness must work like that too - and it doesn’t. Being present when happiness happens - helping a friend, a moment of accomplishment, good news - makes it shine like a little flashlight in the darkness.
Great video, thank you so much for making these. They help more than you know.
i wonder sometimes, besides general attitudes in america, how much having "pursuit of happiness" be apart of the declaration of independence messes with our heads from the second we can even understand what the concept of happiness is. it's written as an unalienable right. that we have a /right/ to be happy. pair that with the human struggle to experience happiness amongst all forms of grief and hardship, i can see how we all become obsessed with it.
if it's my right, then why aren't i happy?
@@eg4441 I’m Canadian, so I the constitution of the US didn’t come into play in my experience - that being said, I do wonder if it messes with Americans. Doesn’t it say ‘life, liberty and the *pursuit* of happiness?’ In which case, it doesn’t say you have a right to happiness, just that you’re free to pursue it.
Which I would think seems like an unattainable thing.
If we did it with another emotion, it’d make less sense - ‘go find anger’, or ‘go find surprise’. As those are individual to each person, there is no one way to go about it. No ‘this is what happiness is, these are the steps, go’.
I could be wrong, it’s late and I’m tired.
Re "the pursuit of happiness" Our Lady said to St. Bernadette (in one of her apparitions at Lourdes) "i cannot promise to make you happy in this life, only in the next." So (as a Catholic) that American Dream called "the pursuit of happiness" always seemed unreal? selfish? unattainable? Surely happiness is something that happens (occasionally) while doing something else? And we only realize what happiness is when we've lost it? And then we grieve for something/ someone in our past that "made us happy" while forgetting all the negative aspects of that past situation - and, even worse - we forget to remind ourselves - if we knew how to be happy once, maybe we can be happy again? That's the problem though, isn't it? We can't be happy just because we WANT to be, it is elusive and more likely to happen if we forget about it and do other things - especially do things for other people... Then, if we are lucky, that person will be happy and maybe they will smile at us/ with us? Now - THAT is a spark of happiness!! 😊
YES DO A PART 2! The last part of: Being that person that everyone wants you to be, is exactly what I struggle THE most dealing with depression! When I make new friends (or even date), and the friendship is moving up to a good friend or dating getting serious, I struggle with: When to tell them I have depression. I've had WAY too many friendships and relationships end because they tell me they "can't handle the depression." As a result, I feel too diseased and unlovable.😔
The last 3 - 8 minutes of this video helped me understand why I've always felt "unloved" by the guys I've dated/married. You have no idea what an epiphany this is for me! Listening to your videos has helped me so much! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! Please never stop publishing content! You get me without even knowing me!
Best sleep advice I’ve ever heard: count backwards from 1000. It gives your brain just enough to focus on without actually thinking.
Or say the Rosary 🙏🏻 or the Divine Mercy Chaplet - THAT particular prayer i find especially helpful, for some reason, it can stop the awful crying-fits which sometimes attack me at night, they are part of my depressive mood-swings and they are... AWFUL. But when i can concentrate sufficiently to say the Divine Mercy Chaplet, truly it never fails. Believe me, it is more than a placebo effect. And for those who don't believe in it, well, all i can say is - it works for me and it can't do any harm - problem is: i forget to say it or i forget the words or - the hurt feelings are so overpowering they intrude into my prayer-time 🙄 God! I can bw such a sad case!
I found your channel when I was looking for some solace from a broken relationship. I invested much emotion into the other person. I tried to be a person that they loved. At first it worked well, but two years later, that person broke the promise I asked of them. I walked away realizing that this person did not care for me or love me enough not to hurt me in such a devastating way. It hurt a lot. I’ve had Bipolar Disorder for years, and I spiraled into a depression episode. Your video clips are great advice and they have saved me, especially when I had to wait for so long for a session with my psychiatrist or therapist. Now I’ve got stronger and the pain has lessened. It doesn’t stop altogether, but I'm on my way to recovery. I can't thank you enough, Dr. Scott.
Thanks for these tip's. I will be working on the sleep + happiness tip's. As soon as I lay down my mind goes into thoughts of things that my parents did or said to me. I grew up in a narcissistic household. I'm now 67 and my parent have been gone some 30+ years. Regarding love, the biggest love has come from my cats. From the age of 26 until 7 months ago when my cat Rocky passed at 19, the biggest love has been from my cats and I now miss that immensely. My career involved working with folks with disabilities including autism which has brought happiness to me.
Thanks again for your help, appreciate every word!
Dr. Scott, thank you for faithfully continuing to put up these videos. I know it’s a lot of work, but you are making a difference. I lost my husband to suicide a year and a half ago and lost my insurance at the same time. There just isn’t money for a good therapist, right when I need it most. Your videos are a lifeline.
I was crying before I watch this video. But seeing Dr. Scott talking kind of calm me. Thank you doctor.
Dr, can you do a video on the correlation between depression and addiction? And how to quit any addiction?
54 seconds in and I already feel so seen.
I'm glad I'm not alone in the thought that the human brain responds to 'brute force' with resistance and regression. I thought it was just me for the longest time. xD No matter how many times I tried doing something I didn't want to, I always found that my brain would just say "NO." and just stop everything and reduce me to a motionless lump.
100% Spot on! Thanks! Two years ago I finally found a solution for my problem of mind racing instead of falling asleep, and falling back to sleep from night terror dreams: I listen to audio books on my kindle with an automatic turn off in 30 minutes. By concentrating on the story I swear I automatically fall asleep within 5-10 minutes...every time! I had to keep at it at first but it got easier over time. I place my kindle under my pillow so it is somewhat muted and doesn't fall off the bed. For the first time in my life (I'm 62) I am sleeping 7-8 hours a night. Hope this helps others!
I have made this comment numerous times. I have to again. If it wasn’t for Dr Scott, I’d continue to believe what others try to tell me “humm…no one else has those issues”.
And again- why are no other professionals opening the door(s) on this (mental health).
Great advice. You are a great communicator.
Hi, my name is Steven, and I'm addicted to over thinking.
When I can't sleep I'll just say, screw-it, if I'm going to be awake I might as well learn something so I read a book. After maybe a paragraph or two...knocks me right out.
For me, trying to be happy is inauthentic but I can get to being neutral.
Hi, Steven. I like this strategy, and used to incorporate reading into my bedtime routine. Now, I am struggling because I no longer wish to go outside, get in the car, and drive to the library. Or the grocery store. Or anywhere except to work.
I understand the neutral feeling.
Take care.
Good morning. I lost my husband April 28 after 3 years of battling ALS, and I have been trying to get my life back on track ever since. I do not have any energy and most of the time I have no motivation to do anything. I am alone and I have been going to therapy and taking Prozac but I’m not making much headway. I have always been a very active person and had many projects going at same time, now NOTHING. my question is what else can I do to improve my energy? I do force myself to walk 30 minutes Monday through Friday but then I came home and sleep for 2 hours. I’m afraid I’m sinking into a dark hole that I might not be able to come back from. Thank you very much.
Sending love, light and hugs. 🩷
💔💗
Be ok with yourself. You're still mourning and that's a huge shift from going from a caretaker to being alone. Don't be so hard on yourself. It's ok to reset yourself. I'm so sorry for your loss, it's devastating.
Your energy is low to let you mourn. Respect your energy. Go with it. You are not sinking into a dark hole, you are mourning the death of your husband. Stock up on frozen food and easy to prepare food and just give yourself forty days of mourning. Give yourself permission to surrender to the grief for those 40 days. Then take it from there. Pray for your husband's soul each day for those forty days. Ritualise your forty days of mourning.
So sorry, I lost my husband on April 24 from ALS. I understand your pain
Thanks a lot appreciate you!!! Take care and have a good Friday. ❤
Thank you. I needed to hear a lot of this. I have been masking for so long.
Every time, it's just so on point and what i need to hear! Thanks a lot dr. Scott 🔥
I don't want you to take this wrong way Scott. I took a massive break from trying to fix myself as it was making me feel worse and more under pressure. I just let all my thoughts and feelings come and go at there own pace. Sure it's not been great all of the time. But I've generally been better just allowing my thoughts and feelings to be. I thought now was the time to try out some new techniques but I now feel like its making me fall into that horrible place again. I just cant do therapy without getting obsessed with fixing it all. What advice can you give me
It's surprising how often we fall into these traps-like overthinking, self-criticism, or unrealistic expectations-without even realizing it. By identifying these mental pitfalls, we can take proactive steps to shift our mindset and improve our overall well-being. This exploration serves as a valuable reminder that much of our unhappiness stems from within, and by changing how we think, we can significantly enhance our quality of life. It’s an insightful reflection on the power of mindset in shaping our happiness.
Thank you for this video. Really insightful
That really helped. Thanks.
So much wisdom. Thank you x
I am happy to hear you 😄 Your points are right as always
this is a very perceptive and insightful video. thank you
Great video ❤ I love your advice
Your thoughts on happiness remind me of a saying "Happiness is like a butterfly. The more you chase it the more it will evade you. But if you notice the other things around you, it will gently come and sit on your shoulder. "
Trying to make multiple children happy will drive you crazy. I used to drive through both Wendy's and McDonald's to please each child. My Mom would cook a meal and it was either take it or leave it. If you left it, you went to bed hungry. She did not cater to you or care...and I survived.
I always heard the same response as a child. “ eat what everyone is having or you’re going to be hungry, period ! “ 😅😅 It worked
My wonderful mother was a people pleaser. She’d go many places. I am sorry now I was such a brat. I wish she had put her foot down and said “We are having XYZ. There are fruit and veggies in the fridge too if you don’t like XYZ. Have a salad or be hungry. Up to you.”
WOW. This video is a gamechanger - especially #3 relating life needs to income & expenses 🎯🤯💯
This is very very helpful right now- and i dont feel like im having to force myself to be positive enough to finish the video
I love you Dr. Eilers, you have really helped me.
I heard a long time ago that you should have high expectations, but
suffering disappointment when things don't go the way you had hoped.
Low expectations is not a hopeless attitude, it's a reality check. When
something positive happens, the joy and blessing gives me a boost.
You make more sense to me than anyone. Articulate my core beliefs. Thank you.
Thank you. That was excellent!
Telling myself, I’m not going to use today. Then I end up psyching myself out into wanting it even more than usual
Dr. Eilers’ gets it. He is a friend for mental health.
For when everything is learning ❤❤❤
He’s incredible!! ❤
Hello Scott thankyou. I get alot from your work and videos. I have trouble with my mind. I have cptsd. I try so hard to overcome my different improper upbringing. I feel betrayed and unhappy heart problems. I have counselling but sleep badly. I am on anti depressants (tricyclic type) Thankyou.....KB UK x The rioting in the UK has been abit much , maybe you saw our News.😮
Overloading myself with responsibility was my main problem for years. I was always expected to show up and be "functioning" at family gatherings until I couldn't anymore. Once I declined more invitations, I realized that there were a lot of responsibilities I thought people had and while it is kind of heartbreaking to not attend and no one missing you, it's also very freeing - And most people that ARE annoyed when I take time for myself don't dare to complain to me about it :)
Dr. Eilers - your shampoo bottle example was good, but I quickly found a way to outsmart my mind by playing my mind on game, where in I imagined myself, throwing away an empty bottle of shampoo into the garbage where I couldn’t see it, because it was gone, or used up, and it worked until you kept mentioning it over and over and over again for the next three minutes and so I couldn’t get out my mind because I appearing you talk about it. That was kind of unfair to challenge people to not think about the shampoo bottle, even if the challenge was indirect, but then keep mentioning and mentioning mentioning. I feel like the technique I developed on the fly was actually a good one and was working well, but was kind of sabotaged inadvertently
Pretty darn clever!! I love your idea!!😅❤
To distract my mind from negative thoughts, my sister suggested I hum a tune...anything will do. She said that the mind can then only concentrate on the tune, and not the negative thought(s).
Did it work?
Thank you Dr Scott I just started listening to you a few days ago and your the first doctor first person to make since out of all of this. My life has been one uncertain experience after another and everyone from psychiatrists to narcotics anonymous to religious people have any idea how to answer my questions I’m just another number on meds or another addict loser who can’t get it together I know this real I hope it’s ok just wanted you to know how nice it is to have you talking to us I would love to talk to you if that is at all possible thank you Christina D
Excellent, as always Thanks
The best way for me to fall asleep is to put on a boring video with a soothing voice and engage my mind with it. It causes your brain to follow rule 1. Thanks for the video Dr Scott 😂
"try not to think about a bottle of shampoo" me: aww shit I'm out of shampoo. Thanks for the reminder 🤣
Very helpful, as always👍
Happiness - a word so very often,and overused and yet poorly defined.
No one can define it!
Happiness is based on happenings. Joy comes from a relationship with Jesus Christ!
@@lisakrushinski9436 I see it the opposite way lol, happiness is a state of being where you're fully aligned and connected to the divine (Jesus in your case), but joy is a temporary emotion that comes from like going to an amusement park.
@@rongike No, joy is sacred. Pleasure is from the senses. Joy is a new born baby or a wedding.
@@francefradetjardineslacora8114 everything is sacred.
Don't ask your kids to decide .
Surprise them with your own satisfaction avoid squabbling 😊
They are kids still learning show them
you are gently taking charge 😊
This is so relevant to me, I don't know how to thank you. 😢
I think the 'income' model reminds me that I'm just so effing tired of trying to try. For me, the gathering of the income does little more than wear me out so much that I can't enjoy any of that security.
But maybe I'm more busted than most.
I am the Caretaker of my Husband diagnosed with Early Onset Alziemers Dementia. I try to make sure to care for him more than myself, I was prescribed Seroquel for sleep years ago I usually can't fall asleep without it because it knocks me out, but I usually don't get quality sleep anyways cause I'm right in the Middle of Menapause, get nightsweasts alot. I take Progesterone only can't have estrogen because I Smoke, I guess there's a danger of blood Clots. I try my best to pray and leave things to God and not Worry it's difficult though.
if you ever need assistance with caring for him you should seek it out. you deserve to be healthy just as much as he deserves to be cared for. let the bad days be bad and the good days be good. wishing the both of you peace. the world is tough, even in good circumstances
the estrogen patches don’t cause stroke. check those out.
@aylen3322 Wow!! That's interesting 🤔 I know Strokes are caused by Blood Clots, but it's Blood Clots My Doctor said is the issue, I'm trying to get a new PCP because my current one won't treat me with Medications that I want to try for different issues I have, and I feel like he talks to me like I'm a Child and I'm Way, Way Older Than Him!! I Can't Stand Doctor's they seem to have a God Complex, like I don't know my body and what I need at 51 Years Old. Thank You for the Tip I will Check into it.
Sleeping every other day means half the time I'm too exhausted to be stressed, and I always fall asleep quickly!
Hello doctor. I am trying to fight through depression. I need your advice. I am kind of envying you because yiu have an understanding wife and two kids. My husband is not mentally compatible with me and i have been trying to concieve for 12 years so that my only daughter may have a sibling and i have two kids. I am grateful for what i have but the impossiblity of having mentally compatible husband and the overwheming feeling that i am getting too old with decreased chances of pregnancy are not letting me breath freely. Please guide what perspective or technique may help me.
Please respond....
just replace the shampoo bottle with a wine bottle .. lol thats what Im obssesed about
For Me >> I THINK AHEAD, like a Flow Chart : If A happens, then ill do X or Y ..if B happens, then Ill do M or N ..etc,etc,etc .. 👍🏽👍🏾👍🏿
@dr.scotteilers Fewer options for the kids! Give them 3 options of where to go and what game to play.
I remember being told to force myself to be happy or to go to sleep right away, and I'd always get frustrated when it never worked. Or I would mask being happy and then break down without realizing why. It's tough work to be happy. To be happy naturally or fall asleep naturally is a long process that can't be rushed. No matter how much we're told by advertisers or authority figures that we can magically become happy if we buy XYZ.
I really want to be happy, but i can't force it. It's just a thing that'll happen naturally as long as I can take care of myself and have the resources around me to do so
This so so true and helpful, THANK YOU!❤ as for kids, I’d be like here’s what we are doing. 😂
Damn shampoo bottles actually stress me out
I try to imagine being sleepy and falling asleep, I think that's how I fell asleep last night 🤣
It would be great if you did a video on "masking". I believe I'm on the autism spectrum. Have not been officially diagnosed; too expensive is what I'm told. How can I have healthy relationships "out in the world" without masking? Thanks again, Dr. Scott.
What I love about your stuff boils down to one word: nuance. Almost every doctor representing Western medicine should be ashamed of how they see mental health treatment and the respective individuals with various complex disorders.
What happens when you have chronic illness, how do you move forward in life? How do you make your life better? How do you stop thinking about it?
@@janicesitzes241 You tell yourself it's the new normal and you adapt accordingly. You learn all you can about your illness and you become an expert on it. You accept that some friends will fall away and others will come into your life. You join support groups or create them for that illness. You become a crusader for people with your illness and you create your community.
Shift the focus. Don't see the 90% but the 10% that is going right or good or whatever you are grateful for. What we focus on, grows!
@@sagsunlibrarisingvirgomoon3007 Horoscopes are the occult. Forbidden as demonic by the Catholic church. Just a heads up. You are inviting demons into your life with Tarot etc.
Working harder just makes life worse for me. Hard work just creates new problems for me. I don’t understand why. I acknowledge I’m in the minority here with this.
bc you're not enjoying working hard. work should not be an unpleasant activity.
Minority or not, you are not alone. I was told for decades to do that. That I am a lazy useless person, because not doing whatever, fill in blank. CPTSD here, now 74. With sleep apnea since childhood. I was physically exhausted, in pain from waking with a hypoxic headache. Every day. It wasn't even diagnosed for 50 years.
So no, I COULD NOT do more. "Guilty." And it's a lie.
@@rongikefor most people work isn’t enjoyable. I get your point but that’s not the reality for most people.
@@CM-jb7fs isn't that just social programming? and like a mindset thing? like you grew up seeing people complain about how some activity is annoying and so you just automatically decided to feel the same way without giving it a chance?
"Don't think about a shampoo bottle."
...I instantly thought of a jar of mayonnaise but I don't know why.
I really want to set up a routine for myself that will work. but it's hard I am in recovery from schizoaffective disorder bipolar type. My mind thinks deep about everything and tries to complicate things. I know why I do it I felt dumb as a kid growing up and I always want to prove my intelligence now. but I'm always tense and anxious, I know my thoughts are generally causing this and I think it has to do with my core beliefs which are negative. I spent years glued to a screen reading about everything ok wikis, websites, TH-cam, etc. because I felt like I was stupid and my condition made me think I needed to "catch up." well all this obsessing backfired I messed up my brain I don't remember what it feels like to have a healthy routine. I hardly remember what it feels like for my body to feel healthy inside. I think I mixed myself up doing really unhealthy habits and doing things sporadically for years. I'm not sure if I can ever feel healthy again....
I thought about a bottle of champagne. That tastes like shampoo.
So you are saying when I try so hard to get back on my track I keep steering through the shrubbery?
I stress myself with the hardcore wish to get better - makes sense.
Reminds me of the concept of "Wu Wei" - to use "no force". But I didn't connected it to my "positive" intentions....yet.
3:01 lmfao😂
Therapists when your card declines:
the last point. ouch.
Me being the only male in the home, I get no personal time, I am not allowed self care, hobbies are not allowed, Its been 7 years and I can't even think about it. Every moment of my day is full of everyone else, so I sit here in bed trying to research what else is wrong with me while trying to fall asleep. It's depressing.
Psychedelics definitely have potential to deal with mental health symptoms like anxiety and depression, I would like to try them again but it's just so hard to source out here
I’ve been researching on psychedelics and it’s benefits to individuals dealing with Anxiety, Depression, ADHD and from my findings, they really work and I’ve been eager to get some for a while but its been difficult to get my hands on them.
The Trips I've been having really helped me a lot. I’m now able to meditate and I finally feel in control of my emotions and my future and things that used to be mundane to me now seem incredible and full of nuance on top of that I'm way less driven by my ego and I have alot more empathy as well
I was having this constant, unbearable anxiety due to work stress. Not until I came across a very intelligent mycologist. He saved my life honestly
@@ThomasReinhardt773
I feel the same way too. I put too much on my plate and it definitely affects my stress and anxiety levels. I am also glad to be a part of this community.
@@WalterFair130Does he deliver to various locations?
well… I‘d guess the #3 (ignoring own needs) may even enact parasu!cidal tendencies, i.e. trying to be well in ‚wrong life‘ is perceived as incoherence of ‚gaslighting oneself‘ merely.
8:20 this is nice advice
That's what I'm taking out of this right now.
Cognitive behavioral therapy has always felt like brute force to me. No wonder it never worked lol
Sir this jayanti from India ,I am my master in psychology and I am a double master and undergo a PhD
I want to work under your guidance Is this possible .
Anyone had thier lives completely devastated? Divorce, career job loss, deaths in the family etc.. >losing what made your own life and yourself full filled with joy, confidence and inspiration... to be completely shattered. Mentally stressed beyond your capacity? Causing Insomnia, crippling anxiety, PTSD and severe depression. Forced to dwell, ruminate on everything negative. Physical illnesses that paralyze you in constant pain, absolutely unable to do anything? .... 💔😣
@@klanderkal Yes. If you can't walk forward you crawl forward. But you keep going.
Yes, I have. It took time, self-care, and lots of love to move forward. Life can be good again.
I hope this is simple enough
Happiness is sharing a deep belly laugh and watching others faces laugh in total happiness 😊
Happiness in life is not always a good belly laugh all the time .
Laughter brings together all in harmony .
Therefore they are content 😌
How I feel ugh feel crazy hard to stay calm
What do you do when you don't know who your authentic self is, because you lost it from changing faces so many times and are typically in a depressive state?
I never feel "right" and constantly adjusting. I feel the most "real" when i'm angry or aggressive, but it feels wrong to lean into because it comes from a spiteful place. However i hold nothing back in that state and speak my mind no matter how hurtful it may be to others.
I know people enjoy being around someone who smiles and is happy, but it feels exhausting to be that way. I actually have to use muscles just to keep smiling, and remind/convince myself to keep smiling and stay positive.
your kids are very lucky.
My dad didn't have that type of patience
"we are having pizza- shut up and eat it.."
Different time
What helps me >> Having Plans B,C, D ..for Small things as well as Big .. 💪🏽💪🏿💪🏽
Dr. Scott ,Smart councel, yup to much, seems living on over load alot. 15 minute task goal working for procrastination, now😅 dont like feeling like ketsup..... Without meds my imagination station goes a bit sideways. Learned behavior like shame take energy. 😮Stand agreement depression is theft.
When I can't sleep, I tell myself it's not going to kill me to miss sleep tonight, and then I AVOID looking at the time!
What if the thought we have is that some day I'm gonna die?
It's a little frustrating and depressing having that all day, knowing I can't do nothing and being scared of it anyway.
I've already been with 6 psychologist and the last one told me to find an spiritual guide (and I'm atheist 😅)
Hello. Just curious. What type of doctor you are?
Not dismissing the value of this video by any means, just an additional aspect to point number 3: Dr. Scott might have a somewhat biased perception on this if he's using his experience with his clients as the basis for this particular advice. Because those people who come and see him are in the fortunate position to be able to afford therapy and are therefore also likely to have the kind of job or another source of money so that they don't have to worry about day-to-day financial survival.
How is somebody going to prioritise themselves, their self-care, their hobbies if they are in a shitty job that pays them just enough after ungodly hours of work to be able to afford the next step up from living in a cardboard box on the street and the bare minimum of calories to not have their body disintegrate over time?
We should always remember that there are also systemic aspects to our mental health.
Can yiu cover diet and depression?
I am so disappointed that I can't place more than 1 like 🙂
I know that number three is true, but what if you literally cannot stop neglecting your needs or else you'll starve and go homeless?
Wow in all ways