Joshua and the Promised Land - Let's Watch (Saberspark)

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 18 ก.พ. 2018
  • This is a new series! One of the things that I do when I make a review video is watch said movie with my friends. So I figured hey, why not record us ripping on it? Hope you all enjoy!
    "Let's Watch" is a series where my friends and I rip on a movie or show that I'm reviewing for that week
    Saberspark is a TH-cam channel who researches, reviews, and analyzes various movies and cartoon shows from the world of animation
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    Video Advice by Paleo
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ความคิดเห็น • 4K

  • @Saberspark
    @Saberspark  6 ปีที่แล้ว +4047

    This is something new! My friends and I usually watch whatever bad movie I am reviewing for the week so I figured I would record our session and upload it here. Hope you all enjoy! Though it is a bad movie...so maybe you won't...good luck

  • @zandermx9167
    @zandermx9167 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4746

    I said it before and I'll say it again. This movie makes Leo the Lion look like a Disney movie

    • @ladyboombox1428
      @ladyboombox1428 6 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      P.V.T.Gaming Yup

    • @dylandanielantoniogalazoya6618
      @dylandanielantoniogalazoya6618 6 ปีที่แล้ว +51

      P.V.T.Gaming Talking about disney, Does anybody remember the wild?

    • @nighthawk0965
      @nighthawk0965 6 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      P.V.T.Gaming
      This makes Michael bay's pearl harbour look historically correct and better than Titanic

    • @BluJayPegasus
      @BluJayPegasus 6 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      This movie makes The Emoji Movie won an Emmy Award..

    • @KyoTheHyena
      @KyoTheHyena 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Dylan daniel antonio Galaz Oyarzun OMG I LOVE THE WILD!!

  • @Marshmallow_Trees
    @Marshmallow_Trees 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2174

    “Sometimes a ‘No’ means ‘Maybe’.”
    Christ Almighty. ( ಠ_ಠ)

    • @ImTheApexBoy
      @ImTheApexBoy 5 ปีที่แล้ว +102

      sometimes a yes means a no

    • @calebrose740
      @calebrose740 4 ปีที่แล้ว +112

      Sometimes a potato means a tomato

    • @bittercharmer4870
      @bittercharmer4870 3 ปีที่แล้ว +79

      Consent is a lie

    • @themustardman219
      @themustardman219 3 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      Sometimes a maybe means a perhaps.

    • @CrimCrim
      @CrimCrim 3 ปีที่แล้ว +69

      No... NOOOOOOOOO!

  • @nufflx
    @nufflx 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3843

    This makes The Prince Of Egypt look like it was the actual filmed events of what happened

    • @banned2911
      @banned2911 4 ปีที่แล้ว +132

      Smoll Weeb well I already thought that this movie made the prince if egypt look even more real than the reality

    • @anarchistcocktail3455
      @anarchistcocktail3455 4 ปีที่แล้ว +70

      no this makes prince of egypt look like trash /s

    • @genericcreator6467
      @genericcreator6467 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Bir B please tell me you are joking

    • @anarchistcocktail3455
      @anarchistcocktail3455 4 ปีที่แล้ว +68

      @@genericcreator6467 i am definitely not this right here is the greatist movie ever /s

    • @animefam1025
      @animefam1025 4 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      The Prince Of Egypt is a better movie the this sh*t

  • @cerberus0225
    @cerberus0225 4 ปีที่แล้ว +931

    "He put his hands up in the air, so they would know God was on their side"
    T-POSES TO ASSERT DOMINANCE

    • @kobaeatskids8779
      @kobaeatskids8779 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      God approves of the t-pose

    • @lonelybrat9256
      @lonelybrat9256 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @RonTheDuck !!
      Well he did die 👕posing sO-

    • @Lars_Ziah_Zawkian
      @Lars_Ziah_Zawkian 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@lonelybrat9256 hole shit is tru

    • @dragonichigo
      @dragonichigo 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      O
      --I--
      ^

    • @Dreigonix
      @Dreigonix 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      “Doesn’t this look like ‘The saint was crucified’?”
      “It looks like ‘Humanity started using the decimal system’.”

  • @jsb8261
    @jsb8261 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3444

    All of these characters look like they're in constant pain.

    • @inirafitzpatrick8941
      @inirafitzpatrick8941 5 ปีที่แล้ว +161

      JSB every frame of this movie is a cursed image, this might be what you see when you look into the eyes of Cthulhu, sterling your sanity

    • @skyblade7438
      @skyblade7438 5 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      So am I.

    • @bigmanroadman3910
      @bigmanroadman3910 5 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      Well they are in the movie, and I was in constant pain while watching it.

    • @parker-boy98
      @parker-boy98 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      They probably are

    • @AlmightyPolarBear
      @AlmightyPolarBear 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Surely fanart can do them some justice.

  • @movedmovedmoved
    @movedmovedmoved 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1522

    11:15 "are you in any pain?"
    "constant"

  • @karnivorevolpe5344
    @karnivorevolpe5344 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2307

    It makes me so uncomfortable theyre all so...FLESH COLORED.
    ..the nakedness doesnt help

    • @bensanchez8121
      @bensanchez8121 5 ปีที่แล้ว +57

      human flesh is delicious

    • @FiSH-iSH
      @FiSH-iSH 4 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      @BenPony1 the wall of flesh is just your granola bar, isn’t it?

    • @user-qh5jk1mn5i
      @user-qh5jk1mn5i 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      wat abowt mowzess

    • @emmahitchcock1152
      @emmahitchcock1152 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      joshua sometimes a no means maybe ya hear? ;) XD

    • @tlebron8426
      @tlebron8426 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Ben, sweat is also tasty!

  • @justjoannak
    @justjoannak 4 ปีที่แล้ว +637

    When you realize you were part of the target demographic for this movie. Thank goodness my church *NEVER* made me watch this trainwreck of a movie

    • @littlemisseevee2309
      @littlemisseevee2309 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Joanna Uppin I watched that one cult classic one I think dreamworks made it, was really really good

    • @savedutch
      @savedutch 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Joanna Uppin chuch isnt hell ok.....

    • @majortomxyz156
      @majortomxyz156 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Same

    • @roseofhappilove6841
      @roseofhappilove6841 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Me too

    • @Pinkkittie5006
      @Pinkkittie5006 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@littlemisseevee2309 do you mean Prince of Egypt?

  • @juanseohiggins5151
    @juanseohiggins5151 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1467

    "I'm gonna bring you back before dinner"
    Makes him travel in the desert for 40 years

    • @mintblush7922
      @mintblush7922 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Juanse Ohiggins 40 years 40 Likes.

    • @parker-boy98
      @parker-boy98 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      It's a shadow of the past

    • @parker-boy98
      @parker-boy98 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@mintblush7922 What?

    • @mintblush7922
      @mintblush7922 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Parker Green I wrote that when this comment had 40 likes lmao

  • @ametislady2
    @ametislady2 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1360

    *T H I S I S M Y D A Y O F F T H I S I S W H A T I M G O N N A D O*

  • @JoeyLovesTrains
    @JoeyLovesTrains 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1301

    29:44 you'll thank me later

  • @dragonthehero
    @dragonthehero 5 ปีที่แล้ว +287

    15:31
    "I AWAKE"
    "ACTIVATING"

  • @ARedMagicMarker
    @ARedMagicMarker 6 ปีที่แล้ว +675

    Joshua in the thumbnail looks higher than a kite in space.

    • @tonyflamingo1871
      @tonyflamingo1871 6 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      The Red Sterling Mc'Bae higher than a giraffe in Jamaica

    • @MrClean-wd7gw
      @MrClean-wd7gw 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Higher than Uranus.

  • @DarkLordFluffee
    @DarkLordFluffee 6 ปีที่แล้ว +937

    ok but...can you imagine being a kid with some minor home troubles, and your biblical fairy godmother character warps you NOT to say, a bible story about maybe honoring your parents or maybe Jesus's teachings of diplomacy and forgiveness, but a literal war. Like, just drops you in the middle of a war. As an 8 year old. In a grown man's (lion's??) body.

    • @SxTxferlife
      @SxTxferlife 5 ปีที่แล้ว +169

      Not only that, but he had to endure that horrible and hard trip through the Egyptian desert while nearly starving and dehydrated. All that would have been horribly traumatic, maybe that's why Joshua has a permanent fucked up smile from all the trauma that close-quarters bloody combat caused him.

    • @xxkittyxx2599
      @xxkittyxx2599 5 ปีที่แล้ว +159

      Also, the kid spent 40 YEARS in that timeline! When he got through the river in the beginning of the movie he was complaining how long it was and how he wanted the go home, and the angel basically tells him to suck it up. He spent 40 years in that fucking place for what, to appreciate his parents? He's going to end up in a fuckin asylum because of the trauma he had to go through. He basically lived a different life. It's so bizarre

    • @parker-boy98
      @parker-boy98 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      WTF?

    • @parker-boy98
      @parker-boy98 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      He's a guardian angel

    • @raridino600
      @raridino600 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Parker Green
      and?

  • @TV-8-301
    @TV-8-301 5 ปีที่แล้ว +501

    This movie has been with your channel for so long now I'm feeling weirdly attached to the movie

    • @IPukeFire
      @IPukeFire 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      I fought it said "attracted" for min and I was going to say "THIS MOVIE WANTS HAVE SEX WITH YOU?????!!!!! NO NOOOOOO" but thank God you're not saying that. XD

    • @DomSlayerIdk
      @DomSlayerIdk 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      his channel will now be called "Joshua and the garbage reviews

  • @beckypiskura205
    @beckypiskura205 5 ปีที่แล้ว +179

    The 'Ooooooooookay' at 48:20 basically summarizes this whole movie 🤣

  • @a.g.d3162
    @a.g.d3162 6 ปีที่แล้ว +525

    "Welcome to the early ninties!" "This was made in 2004." "........"

  • @yourbasicgorillazfan6201
    @yourbasicgorillazfan6201 6 ปีที่แล้ว +778

    *_sees thumbnail and intro screen_*
    You so
    Fukin’
    Precious
    When you
    Smile

  • @ayarriba9093
    @ayarriba9093 4 ปีที่แล้ว +161

    “Pitch your tent next to mine”
    “Uhhhh I can’t do that.”
    I screeched 😂😂😂😂

  • @squittlequeen2282
    @squittlequeen2282 4 ปีที่แล้ว +278

    “You wanna see god right now?” “YEAH” *drives off cliff*

    • @oh_no318
      @oh_no318 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Is this the original VeggieTales meme where Larry drives the two kids off a cliff?

  • @odenstyle7490
    @odenstyle7490 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1931

    Madagascar 4 looks pretty lit

  • @Nightweaver1
    @Nightweaver1 6 ปีที่แล้ว +928

    31:12
    They made an ark, kind of like a box, so that thousands of years in the future, Nazis could open it and get their faces melted off, and Harrison Ford could start his career.

    • @FiSH-iSH
      @FiSH-iSH 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Yes.

    • @papayadoodlez9994
      @papayadoodlez9994 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Haha

    • @Bananappleboy
      @Bananappleboy 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Thats just one of the purposes it holds I guess.

    • @ascendant-_-gorilla2400
      @ascendant-_-gorilla2400 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Huh

    • @hightidekraken
      @hightidekraken 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Not to ruin the joke but Harrison Ford actually starred in American Graffiti but got his big start in Star Wars A New Hope which is why George Lucas recommended Harrison to Steven Spielberg.

  • @agentplaguemask8082
    @agentplaguemask8082 4 ปีที่แล้ว +92

    48:50
    The sound effect is so perfectly timed that I also thought it was the movie.

  • @insanelydead7451
    @insanelydead7451 4 ปีที่แล้ว +407

    I swear to the gods that when I first heard the 7th commandment: “You shall not commit adultery.” I thought it meant that you shouldn’t become an adult. Which I thought weird because becoming an adult was inevitable, and most of Gods worshipers were adults. I’m fairly certain that I wasn’t the only kid who thought this.

    • @ombrenightcores4153
      @ombrenightcores4153 4 ปีที่แล้ว +65

      My Sunday school teacher said “have you ever seen adult movies? Don’t do that” so I thought it meant to not watch movies that weren’t at most PG 😂

    • @roseofhappilove6841
      @roseofhappilove6841 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      At a short moment in my life, I thought that too.

    • @jesuschavez5875
      @jesuschavez5875 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I kinda did too.

    • @dcmuggamuga407
      @dcmuggamuga407 2 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      Doesn't beat me thinking I was the worst sinner back then because my Catholic school teacher in prep said something like "we pray to god that we will come back safely tomorrow back together" and I thought the "back together" part meant that I literally had to put my body parts back together and I thought that the other kids when they went home had to rip off their limbs until the next day and I held onto that guilt until 2nd or 3rd grade.

    • @plaguewifedaydreamingastro8411
      @plaguewifedaydreamingastro8411 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      That has the same energy as me being afraid of sudoku s a kid bc when I try to solve it I would think "6...6...6" in my head so they must be evil

  • @blitzkriegboi7430
    @blitzkriegboi7430 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1325

    Imagine all the kids that died when Joshua called down those angels to knock the entire city down with mystical hammers

    • @FiSH-iSH
      @FiSH-iSH 4 ปีที่แล้ว +93

      All of the kids were already dead via being sacrificed.

    • @trikitrikitriki
      @trikitrikitriki 4 ปีที่แล้ว +152

      Yes but they're *E V I L* children

    • @HeleentheArcane
      @HeleentheArcane 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      It's okay 'cause they're sinners.

    • @Finn_7117
      @Finn_7117 4 ปีที่แล้ว +50

      They were gonna sacrificed anyway

    • @asid5240
      @asid5240 4 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      And then how that one hooker survived

  • @WeirdnessMaster
    @WeirdnessMaster 6 ปีที่แล้ว +715

    *The Jews*
    Also Joshua sounds a hell of a lot like the "I have the power of God and Anime on my side RRAAHHH" vine kid

    • @thisismyname5657
      @thisismyname5657 6 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      AkinaKat Joshua and the Promised Land scarred the poor kid for life.

    • @SuperSansCraftPhone
      @SuperSansCraftPhone 6 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      "I have the power of god and warriors on my side! YAAAAAAH!!!"

    • @pecklespeckle1
      @pecklespeckle1 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      My exact thoughts

    • @theoldesteban05
      @theoldesteban05 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Weeb god

  • @HoodieHorizon
    @HoodieHorizon 4 ปีที่แล้ว +320

    I FINALLY FIGURED IT OUT!
    That weird brick flaming demon head thing was a model on Joshua's TV right at the beginning of the movie 3:22
    It was fighting a lion that Joshua was pretending to fight as
    Jim lion probably thought like "oh if I put in this image it'll be like Joshua was the hero on his TV" and it takes so many rewatches to notice that very poor Chekhov's gun

  • @SxTxferlife
    @SxTxferlife 5 ปีที่แล้ว +208

    So I literally went frame by frame at that scene in 51:11-51:12 and it happens so fast it super fast, but I do indeed believe Joshua put up his sword right in front of fire head Pharoah thing, and I believe that's how they explain fire head thing being chopped in half the next scene

    • @AnnoyingAsianWitch
      @AnnoyingAsianWitch 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      He fell back and sliced it like butter???

    • @Watermeloncatisthe
      @Watermeloncatisthe 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@AnnoyingAsianWitchexactly. 51:12

  • @ACRacebest
    @ACRacebest 6 ปีที่แล้ว +784

    This was like....torture therapy for a problem you didn't have until AFTER going through the torture therapy.

    • @anikmonette2140
      @anikmonette2140 6 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      ACRacebest Shock treatment seems like a walk to the park after all this... *Immediately shove fork into plug socket and groans with satisfaction*

    • @shadowpoet4398
      @shadowpoet4398 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Like Butters going through testing to find out what traumatized him... It was incredibly traumatic

    • @Lucifersfursona
      @Lucifersfursona 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I’m going to think about this comment every day 😂 rare fuckin insult

  • @nickythehickey
    @nickythehickey 6 ปีที่แล้ว +377

    "Are you in any pain?" *"constant."*
    honestly mood

  • @machintosh3008
    @machintosh3008 4 ปีที่แล้ว +113

    I love his reaction to seeing that abomination at 3:05

    • @celinac5449
      @celinac5449 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      It’s iconic

    • @daretheclaw
      @daretheclaw 2 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      *OOOOOOOOOUUUUGH*

  • @theshiro1238
    @theshiro1238 4 ปีที่แล้ว +127

    20:04 I want an au of this movie where Joshua says "Avengers assemble!"

  • @babyroxasman
    @babyroxasman 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1344

    "Do not murder. But ignore the part just a few minutes ago where I said I'd help you kill all those people"

    • @coldcovoi5408
      @coldcovoi5408 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Babyroxasman that was extrenuos circumstances

    • @trikitrikitriki
      @trikitrikitriki 4 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      If you wanna know the Christian apologetic for that, they say it’s that “kill” and “murder” have different definitions. “Murder” is outside of war and “kill” is the war word.

    • @Abysalss
      @Abysalss 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Liam Paiva Acosta that’s not a Christian apologetic, if anything it’s a Jewish one as they are originally their commandments but there is a difference between reasoning and apologetics.

    • @trikitrikitriki
      @trikitrikitriki 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Jaedon Kuchta Christians still have to account for the Torah law, since it’s all the same God. And the definition of apologetic I am using is “an argument in defense of a religious doctrine”, and that commandment is indeed a part of doctrine that needs to be defended, since it is certainly immoral that an all powerful God commanded the deaths of so many.

    • @masonwright7700
      @masonwright7700 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Liam Paiva Acosta true

  • @Culo_Sniffin_Cheezit
    @Culo_Sniffin_Cheezit 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1892

    "Sometimes a no means maybe."
    *mom, I think I can stay up after 10*

    • @TheSurrealBoye
      @TheSurrealBoye 4 ปีที่แล้ว +46

      Maybe.
      MAAAAAYBEEEEEEEE!

    • @captain_kadaver
      @captain_kadaver 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      this inspired harvey weinstein

    • @nessfinesse1378
      @nessfinesse1378 3 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      I’m glad that joke didn’t go the way I thought it was.

    • @devintariel3769
      @devintariel3769 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      @@nessfinesse1378 neither did those nights at Bill Cosby's house

    • @ninyaninjabrifsanovichthes45
      @ninyaninjabrifsanovichthes45 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Mother I think I can purchase LEGOs

  • @mikelit7476
    @mikelit7476 5 ปีที่แล้ว +133

    46:13 Gotta love how everyone just starts yuckin’ it up. 😂

  • @historycrazy9571
    @historycrazy9571 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    35:12 I love it when the panda appears twice without saying anything

  • @theequanzz
    @theequanzz 6 ปีที่แล้ว +246

    I love when he said “five nights at Freddy’s corpses”

    • @fukkthisnewupdate8882
      @fukkthisnewupdate8882 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Funtime Luna I love the series, but I'm so damn sick of people assuming those books are Canon. They're not! Scott cawthon has specifically said that they take place in an alternate universe!

    • @kylestacey5973
      @kylestacey5973 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@fukkthisnewupdate8882 someone said it thank you new friend

    • @fukkthisnewupdate8882
      @fukkthisnewupdate8882 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Kyle stacey you're welcome, I'm just really strict about the Canon.

    • @kylestacey5973
      @kylestacey5973 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@fukkthisnewupdate8882 Your not the only one

    • @ArtwGraz
      @ArtwGraz 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I'm a fnaf fan

  • @tierneyc9655
    @tierneyc9655 6 ปีที่แล้ว +99

    "uhh, are you in any pain?"
    *"constant."*

  • @dontbesomeme8405
    @dontbesomeme8405 4 ปีที่แล้ว +74

    Joshua in 20 years: _While you all learned to do lion things, I studied the blade_

    • @jesuschavez5875
      @jesuschavez5875 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      While you were still learning how to SPELL YOUR NAME, I was being TRAINED to CONQUER GALAXIES!

  • @maggotie7789
    @maggotie7789 3 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    honestly feels like a horror movie. a random spirit appears to a young boy to make him experience 40+ years in the span of a few hours at most. he comes back with all the memories and experiences yet is not any older and were he to tell anyone, they wouldn't believe him. considering what he had to witness in that time span, it makes it even worse.

  • @Magekat
    @Magekat 6 ปีที่แล้ว +107

    *Guy that appears out of nowhere*
    "You do trust me, right?"
    "Yes"

  • @CorvuZZu
    @CorvuZZu 6 ปีที่แล้ว +267

    Their first reaction to seeing the narrator is just amazing
    3:04

  • @garlicbread1678
    @garlicbread1678 5 ปีที่แล้ว +304

    After watching this video..
    *Me going to sleep*
    *Dreaming joshua and the promised Land*
    Me: *NO NO NOOOOO!!!*

    • @marinapliaki1477
      @marinapliaki1477 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Its NOOO NOOOOOOOO

    • @kingexplosionmurder4631
      @kingexplosionmurder4631 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I wanted to give a like, but I saw it had 69 likes already
      Nice! Niiiiiice

    • @marinacastellanorodriguez9304
      @marinacastellanorodriguez9304 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@kingexplosionmurder4631 LOL sameeee!!!

    • @His_scars
      @His_scars 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Oh no honey. With that dream I think you might be already in *Hell.* 😂🤣😭😭🙏

  • @somepersonauser3324
    @somepersonauser3324 5 ปีที่แล้ว +115

    9:23 ”ooOoOOOh that fire” 😂😂😂

    • @celinac5449
      @celinac5449 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I love that 😂😂😂

    • @celinac5449
      @celinac5449 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      3.05 ohhhh😂😂😂

  • @locomotivefaox
    @locomotivefaox 6 ปีที่แล้ว +326

    From my experience in total war, Joshua boy and his tiger boyfriend would have died as soon as they charged into thousands of enemy soldiers with
    no convoy of guards.

  • @ZipZapTesla
    @ZipZapTesla 6 ปีที่แล้ว +861

    51:45
    Mom: You didn't say grace yet. Joshua isn't even here!
    Dad: (looks at her for a moment, and continues eating)
    _me_

  • @chaosgamer7016
    @chaosgamer7016 4 ปีที่แล้ว +55

    Every time I watch this video, the part that always makes me laugh is 46:11 to 46:23. The laughing of the characters in the "movie" was so loud and nonsensical but I still managed to barely hear Saber and his friends laughing nonsensically at that part too. I don't know why but it always gets me because of how ridiculous and insane it is.

  • @fastred6711
    @fastred6711 4 ปีที่แล้ว +89

    14:33
    I don't like sand, it's course and irritating, and it gets everywhere.

    • @shadowpoet4398
      @shadowpoet4398 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      "I don't like sand... Its so.... Sandy. But you, you are not Sandy, and that is why I love you"
      -Captain Picard or something probably

    • @jesuschavez5875
      @jesuschavez5875 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I like sand. It's squishy.

  • @darcycat
    @darcycat 6 ปีที่แล้ว +488

    I'm so happy I rediscovered your channel :>

    • @sippingteasilently448
      @sippingteasilently448 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      A Flamingo us too :)

    • @indigowendigo8165
      @indigowendigo8165 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Did you ever forget about it at some point? :?

    • @birdleaf03
      @birdleaf03 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      How does one forget ze Saberspark?

    • @hshiik1469
      @hshiik1469 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Rediscovered??

    • @darcycat
      @darcycat 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I started watching jacksfilms;; Sorry Saber :|

  • @tyxbrrr4812
    @tyxbrrr4812 4 ปีที่แล้ว +124

    46:19
    My group chat when I don’t understand a joke

  • @emilygappel
    @emilygappel 4 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    “Sometimes a no means maybe” “I wanna take you on a trip. Do you trust me?” KID, STRANGER DANGER, OH MY GOD!!!!

  • @para_momal
    @para_momal 6 ปีที่แล้ว +384

    I watched "Joshua and the Promise Land" a few days after the review. This is what transpired in the aftermath:
    It started out as usual, with popcorn and a drink. The narrator start speaking and I felt an odd sensation in the back of my brain. Thinking it may have been from my 6th shot of moonshine, I ignored it. *Dad walks in* My face started to twitch slightly. I laid down. *The angel Chris's introduction* It was then that my brain function began to cease. My motor movement and speech flailed wildly and I lost feeling on my right side. *2nd narrator intro* A bright blazing pain shot through my body as I tried to turn the movie off. I just didn't have the strength to move the 2 feet to hit the button. *The fire of God* Foam bubbled forth from my mouth as I choked on my own bile. *No means maybe* All went black as my vision failed. I laid on the floor in convulsions as the rest of the movie killed what was left of my soul and brain cells.
    In conclusion, I made it only 5 minutes into the movie. I sit here now typing with eye movement from my Steven Hawkin style wheelchair.
    If you value your health, don't watch this movie.

    • @lilpsycho1095
      @lilpsycho1095 6 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Oh my. Im still watching it.

    • @para_momal
      @para_momal 6 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Lil psycho • Don't say I didn't warn you!

    • @lilpsycho1095
      @lilpsycho1095 6 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Para Momal I just watched ten minutes and im cringing at the movie so hard. I regret it, but I have learned something

    • @LapisTheWolf
      @LapisTheWolf 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Holy crap

    • @camerkiddo
      @camerkiddo 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Para Momal Lol. That sounds horrible!

  • @rarekills4649
    @rarekills4649 6 ปีที่แล้ว +559

    WHEN WE READ THE TITLE WE SAID
    LETS NOT :)

    • @darthtigger1
      @darthtigger1 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      GANG GLO TV OR HELL NO BOI!!!!!

    • @aetheryn5622
      @aetheryn5622 6 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Me:**clicks video**
      Sure. Why not loose a couple more stem cells.

    • @imppro
      @imppro 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      GANG GLO TV+ NO LET'S ;)

    • @doctorsex.
      @doctorsex. 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Artistic Art seems like you already did..

    • @gloom_bug
      @gloom_bug 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      No
      We said
      Let's not.
      (Sorry I couldn’t help myself I'm a grammar freak :P)

  • @---------no
    @---------no 2 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    I appreciate how Jim Lion feels the need to explain what pyramids are to the kids back home while also expecting them to know what a leadership training seminar is

  • @Johnwicklover1994
    @Johnwicklover1994 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    11:01 okay but the way that lion is moving on the horse...it’s unnerving

  • @ToonyBandit
    @ToonyBandit 6 ปีที่แล้ว +160

    Wow guys. The new version of "The Prince of Egypt" looks great!

    • @imppro
      @imppro 6 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      Bandit the Wolf You mean the prequel to Zootopia?

    • @dylandanielantoniogalazoya6618
      @dylandanielantoniogalazoya6618 6 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Bandit the Wolf Nah is the crossover of The chronicles of narnia, Lord of the rings, Zootopia and The prince of egypt made by the asylum

    • @reggie9897
      @reggie9897 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Melese Getahun no, the sequel of the Lion King or Leo the Lion where everyone has evolved to naked anthropomorphic animals

    • @dylandanielantoniogalazoya6618
      @dylandanielantoniogalazoya6618 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Rage the Fire-breathing wolf Don't forget that they have no tails and the animals are racist because they killed and fight with black bulls

    • @imppro
      @imppro 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Rage the Fire-breathing wolf My mistake

  • @nathanapplegate5374
    @nathanapplegate5374 6 ปีที่แล้ว +240

    That running animation at 16:05 had me laughing for like 10 minutes. I am not even kidding. That was so bad.

  • @brongis4797
    @brongis4797 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    46:11 I love how the laughing just slowly becomes screams of torment

  • @weirwer9960
    @weirwer9960 4 ปีที่แล้ว +150

    *Funniest Moments To Me*
    "I can barely hear him because the SOUND 👏 EFFECTS👏 ARE 👏SO 👏DAMN👏 LOUD!" 11:29
    16:07 "WHAT WAS/IS THAT??"

    • @celinac5449
      @celinac5449 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Wubbawababewe i thought that was the movie 😂😂

    • @kingexplosionmurder4631
      @kingexplosionmurder4631 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      What about 29:45

    • @kittycawn_
      @kittycawn_ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      "WHAT IS *THAT*?!!!"
      "hohokay moses-"

    • @Watermeloncatisthe
      @Watermeloncatisthe 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      16:07 WAŒÆẼÆĦ ŴĦÆŒŴ

  • @Slonitram
    @Slonitram 6 ปีที่แล้ว +74

    23:18 I love how the sound's like
    *AAA-*

    • @JKVR334
      @JKVR334 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      AAUUGG-

  • @evoltscoffee
    @evoltscoffee 6 ปีที่แล้ว +262

    Saber's laugh is the best thing about this video not gonna lie

    • @maihaiki888
      @maihaiki888 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I know😅😂
      P.S sorry I'm late

    • @MadMamluk88
      @MadMamluk88 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      50:01

  • @penmastery5243
    @penmastery5243 5 ปีที่แล้ว +68

    Hey Kid miss me?
    No... NOOOOO!!

  • @weirdcakes304
    @weirdcakes304 4 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    “put your tent next to my tent”
    ah yes, the new “put your minecraft bed next to mine”

    • @kritzkrieg14
      @kritzkrieg14 ปีที่แล้ว

      haha jk haha….. unless?

  • @orzelgryf
    @orzelgryf 6 ปีที่แล้ว +240

    Did someone say "Mystery Science Theater 3000"?

    • @liquidstereomusic
      @liquidstereomusic 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      I used to watch all of their reviews, I would be ROTFL by the end of every movie.

    • @sweetcinnamonpnchkin
      @sweetcinnamonpnchkin 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Or the evolved form “Rifftrax”

    • @caderamsey8878
      @caderamsey8878 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      orzelgryf PLEASE let that be a episode.

    • @Sand-Walker13
      @Sand-Walker13 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      That show is gold

  • @Frisbeee275
    @Frisbeee275 6 ปีที่แล้ว +71

    25:50 as the glowing orb speaks... "The fitness Gram pacer test is a-"

  • @Gusweb98
    @Gusweb98 5 ปีที่แล้ว +101

    18:26 O O O O O O O H H H H H H H H B A B Y !

  • @janicejohnson8075
    @janicejohnson8075 4 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    The marching is the sound of the chips in your mouth while watching a movie

  • @Gamerguy4567
    @Gamerguy4567 6 ปีที่แล้ว +82

    The "Wabababababab" moment around the 48/49 minute mark absolutely destroyed me. I was in tears.

    • @_marielenag
      @_marielenag 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Silly Sarcasm SAME i was dying of laughter! XD

    • @PrincessGalaxia9
      @PrincessGalaxia9 6 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      if that isn't the epitome of perfect timing, then I don't know what is.

    • @theinglorious8963
      @theinglorious8963 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Why were you crying baby.

    • @faronomus1589
      @faronomus1589 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Silly Sarcasm ikr XD

  • @rararasputin4447
    @rararasputin4447 6 ปีที่แล้ว +389

    Why would he dismount a horse in the middle of a battle.

    • @hankcyrus9776
      @hankcyrus9776 6 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      the romans did that during the battle of cannea and that totally didn't end up being the worst defeat in roman history.

    • @hankcyrus9776
      @hankcyrus9776 6 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      but in this piece of shit movie he prob did it because it was easier to animate, real people might to make them a less of a massive target and it is not like 2 non riders can charge a mob. My biggest annoyance is why the chariots weren't scyted chariots.

    • @imppro
      @imppro 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Ra Ra Rasputin Russia's Greatest Love Machine

    • @davidgeorge1943
      @davidgeorge1943 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Hold on a second, lemme dust off my Thracia 776 jokes

    • @theFakeRed
      @theFakeRed 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      I've seen you somewhere before....

  • @xoxobubonicbaddiebimbo9169
    @xoxobubonicbaddiebimbo9169 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    46:16 DUDE WHY IS iT SO LOUD?!?! I CANT BREATHE 😭😭😭😭😭😭

  • @rolleyarts8919
    @rolleyarts8919 5 ปีที่แล้ว +86

    41:18
    Can i just point out that when Joshua asks the narrator if he's a friend or foe. The narrator says "neither" but immediately says "But as commander of the army of the lord"
    Doesnt that mean he's with god?
    That just confuses me everytime I watch this

    • @itsjustjuju7945
      @itsjustjuju7945 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      That is not the narrator

    • @rolleyarts8919
      @rolleyarts8919 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Colin Shaw go back a little bit and you’ll see the narrator holding the sword and shield

    • @itsjustjuju7945
      @itsjustjuju7945 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@rolleyarts8919 it could've been a transition

    • @rolleyarts8919
      @rolleyarts8919 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @Jake Elliott I watch this video multiple times. This movie is so bad I love it

    • @raidraptor5893
      @raidraptor5893 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      god is only a friend until you piss him off, in which case the earth opens and you are cast into hell. steal a kid's lego? to hell with you! commit murder on a man? also to hell with you!

  • @Nick-cg5hi
    @Nick-cg5hi 6 ปีที่แล้ว +167

    I’m glad it’s all shown, idk I’m so used to copyright and people’s usual watch times shortening up the video to only “the best reactions”.

  • @ZachGWatterson
    @ZachGWatterson 6 ปีที่แล้ว +150

    Why does the Lion's face look like he's going to commit adultery?

    • @delta2372
      @delta2372 6 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Cheeki Breeki adultery is the act of sleeping with someone's spouse, I think the word you mean is rape

    • @Quadrenaro
      @Quadrenaro 6 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      Delta 23 Rape is often considered adultery aswell.

    • @delta2372
      @delta2372 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Quadrenaro was not aware of that

    • @Kimby02
      @Kimby02 6 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      Remember what the best friend said
      Sometimes a no means maybe

    • @Quadrenaro
      @Quadrenaro 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      D:

  • @AnnoyingAsianWitch
    @AnnoyingAsianWitch 5 ปีที่แล้ว +55

    Sometimes a no means maybe.
    No.
    NOOOOOOOOOOO!

  • @JaggSwag230
    @JaggSwag230 5 ปีที่แล้ว +115

    24:17 I couldn't stop laughing at this part 🤣

  • @Bast-hs5sz
    @Bast-hs5sz 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1202

    Is... Is it bad that I want to draw good fanart of random screencaps of this movie?
    Edit: i did it. on Twitter /real_bast6415/status/1261652653702033408?s=20

    • @AnnoyingAsianWitch
      @AnnoyingAsianWitch 5 ปีที่แล้ว +204

      Please do.

    • @charmxsbeanie4726
      @charmxsbeanie4726 5 ปีที่แล้ว +98

      No. I've been thinking the same thing

    • @red_dickfigures
      @red_dickfigures 5 ปีที่แล้ว +93

      I'm honestly gonna try to do an animation on this and tweet it to Saberspark-

    • @Ins0mniac.c0s
      @Ins0mniac.c0s 5 ปีที่แล้ว +64

      i will pay you

    • @fakecore9811
      @fakecore9811 4 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      I feel like this anytime I see really bad character design for films lmao

  • @strawberrycake3474
    @strawberrycake3474 6 ปีที่แล้ว +131

    No NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

    • @alexdionisos
      @alexdionisos 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Can we get a 5 hour loop?

    • @bigmanroadman3910
      @bigmanroadman3910 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Some one should make an edit of empire strikes back where in the scene where Luke learns Vader’s his dad, but before he falls of the thing his lines are replaced with that. Or at the end of episode 3 when Vader screams no.

    • @Watermeloncatisthe
      @Watermeloncatisthe 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Why when I translate to English it says
      “Nothing_you love_you ..”

  • @Stary_star_13
    @Stary_star_13 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    38:49 i love it the joshua's smile

  • @ewanedwards6822
    @ewanedwards6822 5 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    That last fight at the end between Joshua and whatever the hell that floating head reminded me of that skit the AVGN does sometimes at the end of a video, y'know? When he's like shooting a 2d image of a game cartridge with a Nintendo blaster or something.

  • @paintedparadox4664
    @paintedparadox4664 6 ปีที่แล้ว +731

    Yikes, looks like Zootopia 2 had quite a low budget...

    • @theinglorious8963
      @theinglorious8963 6 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      And apparently likes reading a little bit of the bible

    • @pewdiepaulproductions6339
      @pewdiepaulproductions6339 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      This was before zootopia

    • @GodEmperor-of-Mankind
      @GodEmperor-of-Mankind 6 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      r/woooosh

    • @x-fun3149
      @x-fun3149 6 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Kenshirō Kasumi
      I see you're a man of culture

    • @olliegoria
      @olliegoria 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      A comparison that should never be made again.

  • @mikethegrunty5968
    @mikethegrunty5968 6 ปีที่แล้ว +202

    I will never diss my art again

    • @Bee.sBzzwords
      @Bee.sBzzwords 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      The animation makes my art look like famous paintings in an art gallery. I'm with you, never dissing my art again. (○_○)

    • @sugarGlassbunny
      @sugarGlassbunny 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yup I will never say my art sucks ever again no matter what people say

    • @amogusinsuster9560
      @amogusinsuster9560 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Even my drawing looks better

  • @somanypedals
    @somanypedals 5 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    Saber Spark: Watches Joshua and the promise land
    Also Saber Spark: No, no!

  • @P4rz1va1
    @P4rz1va1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Chris convincing Josh that they should take those people's land sounds like he's a villain trying to trick a child. Just because these are "bad people" that means we can do whatever we want to them. I hate that mentality in people and it's pretty common in modern day.

  • @TremossN
    @TremossN 6 ปีที่แล้ว +87

    "Joshuas not even here!" *continues to eat chicken*

  • @alicesidelnikov7769
    @alicesidelnikov7769 6 ปีที่แล้ว +72

    Who brings an 8 year-old to a battle field to fight?

    • @j_stuffmin
      @j_stuffmin 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @AvadaKedavra _Me: Have you read or watched The Chronicles of Narnia?

    • @alicesidelnikov7769
      @alicesidelnikov7769 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      BlyndHydra Oh.
      I haven't thought of Narnia, lmao. But yes, I did read the book.

    • @roykoopa9490
      @roykoopa9490 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Static man

    • @fan-done1856
      @fan-done1856 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Alice Sidelnikov poor kid! He’ll get PTSD way too young

  • @blackholebunny9815
    @blackholebunny9815 4 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    51:17 i figured out why the demon thing dies - It runs into Joshua's sword.

  • @123dididi
    @123dididi 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    29:46 when you realize school isn’t over, it has just begun.

  • @cakepoprock
    @cakepoprock 6 ปีที่แล้ว +305

    i watched this like 5 times i can’t stop laughING HELP

    • @zapato6071
      @zapato6071 6 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      X2 if i Made this for a project in a first year animation school they would expeled me or give me an F. But at leats they would give me points for being funny unintencionaly

    • @anikmonette2140
      @anikmonette2140 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      cakepoprock Looks like me when I watched his Trolland review... Seriously I should try again with a joint! I don't even do drugs and quit smoking a while ago but I really want to try to watch this movie stoned, which seems like the opposite of a good idea since it appears to be quite possible to die from laughter. And seeing how I choked last time from laughing too hard it might actually be a life threatening situation...

    • @Zekushiiido
      @Zekushiiido 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Im sorry for your loss

    • @lemrester
      @lemrester 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      5 times? Oh my-

    • @SuperSansCraftPhone
      @SuperSansCraftPhone 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      No...
      NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

  • @michaelceraaaaa
    @michaelceraaaaa 6 ปีที่แล้ว +390

    mom: don't eat we haven't said grace yet dad:*puts whole chicken leg in mouth* me:*laughs* same

    • @torakunoichi
      @torakunoichi 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      Im Awkward it’s his day off it’s what he’s gonna do

    • @rtc_twisted7952
      @rtc_twisted7952 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      The only time me and my family say grace is before Thanksgiving, and so much people already start stuffing their faces before we even begin to say grace.

  • @GAL-CAKE
    @GAL-CAKE 5 ปีที่แล้ว +177

    Saber: was made it 2004
    Me: I was born in 2004
    Explains A lot not gonna lie

  • @Unnamed0413
    @Unnamed0413 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    44:52 you can diss him all you want but he is the best voice actor in this movie

  • @sansskeleton829
    @sansskeleton829 6 ปีที่แล้ว +69

    29:44
    When finals is next week and you haven't studied

  • @ArashikageSteel
    @ArashikageSteel 6 ปีที่แล้ว +51

    “sometimes no means maybe”

    • @ZbJeeBies
      @ZbJeeBies 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      everyone: *_R A P I S T_*

  • @oliverartzzz
    @oliverartzzz 4 ปีที่แล้ว +65

    Joshua terrifies me!
    Im 10 and im just scared of the way it looks im not even joking I AM SCARED OF A BADLY ANIMATED LION NAMED JOSHUA

    • @HeleentheArcane
      @HeleentheArcane 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      You have a really cute cat 😃

    • @Floonter
      @Floonter 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same but I'm 9

  • @parker-boy98
    @parker-boy98 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    I like to think that Joshua sounds like an adult to them when he talks

  • @pondererofpointlessdreams5029
    @pondererofpointlessdreams5029 6 ปีที่แล้ว +75

    As I stared at Joshua, I could only muster the strength to murmur two words;
    *”h e l l n o”*

  • @T_E_G
    @T_E_G 6 ปีที่แล้ว +271

    *Watches movie*
    *Great now I'm blind..*

    • @snowstarr
      @snowstarr 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      genesis guerra how do you type if you blind XD

    • @T_E_G
      @T_E_G 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Snow Starr I'm feeling the keyboard..:D

    • @newYoshtown
      @newYoshtown 6 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Be happy you’re blind,you don’t have to endure this piece of shit of a doodle

  • @myh6274
    @myh6274 5 ปีที่แล้ว +39

    Mom: Lets go watch a movie with family
    Me: what movie?
    Mom: Joshua and the Promised Land
    Me: NoOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

  • @zawayashi
    @zawayashi 5 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    24:17 The point of the whole movie.