I really needed to have heard this truth 50 years ago. At the age of 24 I had finally gone no contact after a lifetime of Narcissistic abuse by my mother. It only lasted a few months and she contacted me apologizing for her controlling and disrespectful actions. Against my better judgement I continued our relationship and of course the criticism, shaming and abuse continued until she passed. Biggest mistake of my life. As Tony says, returning to a relationship of abuse just further deepens the trauma and affects all other relationships.
So sorry to hear you suffered so much at the hand from someone who was meant to care for your well-being. I hope you can heal and know that you are amazing ❤
Thank you for sharing. I've not spoke to my abusive mother for 20 years including my brother also abusive and violent. Our father recently passed, July 10 2024, my brother was there, my step sister said in conversation, my brother feels alone after dad's passing and thinks all is well between himself and me. I said no i can't go back, the violence, abuse, lies, I have compassion for him, I also forgive him. I've been pondering do I reach out to him and I've been confused, so praying for a sign. This answers my question, now I feel relief. ❤
This came to me at the perfect moment. I have an ex that treated me terribly and now they want to come back into my life. I was considering it up until now
Coming back means they ""can't change"" that's why they want to come back. Leaving means they must change, and the need to return is the tell they can't change. The same program will be served by them, as before. I tried that 1 year back, Same shit just days later.
I agree! When a person leaves you broken, it’s about a choice, their choice. People do what is in their heart to do. I accept their choice and move forward with my life. Their acceptance or rejection of me does not and will never define me!
Your only broken, if you allow yourself to be broken. People who mean you no good if you allow (will stomp on you, walk on you, and maybe spit on you. Don’t be nobody’s door mat). Stand strong.
Get back to us after you have dealt with a pyschopath, a real one. Being broken is not a choice, the most dangerous destroy a persons sense of self before they realise what is happening. PTSD is very common in domestic violence survivors.
This reading is like a fine wine. I am taking it in word by word. It's exactly what I need to hear. I'm going through a traumatic experience with an ex, and I've been thinking (and made to feel) that I'm not good enough. I'm going to have to keep this one and listen to it a few times to truly internalize all the important points made here.
Never take back an ex or anyone who ghosts you. They run off “to play” and then blame you. If someone disappears for 3 or more days remove them from your phone and your life.
Yeah... My ex has BPD :).... Cheated on me, and turned around to call me a cheater... Now she's monkey branched, most likely other hoovers will come... But yeah, for her the 1 year and a bit didn't mean shit, instantly changed, literally, personality and all... She did me a favor but yeah....
Sometimes people break up hoping their mate see the light. But if they are stuck, it is hard for them to understand their own potential. Tried assist with helping secure job but lack of follow through was useless, This was why I Broke up but later regretted. Good guy but something was going on and he failed to explain after 10 years. Very private person. As they say set someone free if they come back yours to keep. He has stated I never go backward. Thx to this video🙏🏾
Really related for this reading thank you for amazing reading to make my self more strong to not looking back my back because its so hurting but now my mind is very clear that not deserve to give a second chance thank you universe
Me, except this is my dad. My entire family. It’s hard to accept that having nothing and no one is better than accepting my role as the family scapegoat without complaint.
I'm in the same situation but it's our brainwashing and gaslighting; our mean inner critic is not ourselves but a recording of the voices of our childhood. The scapegoat role is for life within our families. They can't see us in any other way but they don't know us. We will continue to be the scapegoat everywhere we go unless we heal and we can't heal close to them.
Thank You ! This who hurt , treated me badly unjustly terribly in the past without a second thought or a bit of human conscience and critical thinking about their actions and what they heard from… now I after I lonely have made a lot of effort and time , with God’s grace and blessings to heal and strengthen me to recover my wounds and losses, pains, and evolving, they all now wants to manipulatively come back to my peaceful and better life. Thank you for the valuable advice at the right time after my good heart and big consideration in how you treat them good not to hurt them as an empath . Now I am very clear and have clarity for what u must definitely do and protect myself and my family for the rest of my life. Never Give them the unnecessary good treatment and Forgive Them , Let them Go never welcome them back even in my soul my heart! Set my strict principles and strong solid boundaries!
My son is 50 yrs old …he along with his partner have a history of disrespecting me and his late father …realizing that this was a perpetual pattern and choice of their making …a consistent choice to hurt and still want the last word to overpower his aging parents by manipulation has led me on a path of reflection ….someone he can take his frustration out on whilst remaining in denial …hugs and love to my fellow travelers along our pathways ❤
Awesome motivation! Showed up at the perfect time - to reflect back to me how much I have grown in my self-worth and self-respect. "If someone isn't capable of reflecting your worth, turn away and look for those who are able to so with ease."
Love this, I lost my mentor as a child, and let every one of these negative traits infiltrate my life, slowly I’ve been learning how to better myself. This cements all I know and more, thank you endlessly.
Another perspective on the topic is educating yourself about dark manipulation and all the tactics and manipulation forms that people are so capable of and it's very very scary how real and often people are purposely manipulating honestly every single day and every single way possible. I'm living proof, I'm here today because I'm grateful for what I've learned have come very far, I'm not going to snow at all LOL however please educate yourself! And we are all one we are all collective! I hope everybody loves everybody, one day set a time. ❤
For 11 years, same patern over and over again. His love and care, was transfer to his friends, pastor church. He learned to lie and deceived me. He lies so much that he is going to counseling, and it doesn't matter and can't see himself in a mirror. He failed to protect me from harm and dangers from his pastor and church. The pain is overwhelming. I had done so much for this man and forgot to be grateful .
Sometimes it’s not that some one brakes you. It’s you’re being too weak and insecure, so any one can brake you with very little effort. Sometimes strong people just don’t realize they might hurt someone with the words they choose. Learn to set boundaries and always let people know when they cross the line.
Hi Tony, thank you for this , youve conveyed such a crucial message in the various scenarios this happens. i know this as i had stayed in a abusive narriage for 32 years , i finally managed to walk away and it felt like i was waking up from a self induced coma.! I completely get your message about the intracacies and challenges one faces or endures to get to this point of finally walking away. Thank you again, for raising this much needed awareness, 🦋🙏
I never let people back. They always will be thrown away for testing. I dont doubt that they are permanently like that at that time, and the time that they want to comeback.
I did back to him again broken several times within 5 weeks very deeply…..the pain inside me doesn’t know how to come out from this feel something wired and empty heart
I HAVE TO DO THIS WITH SOME PEOPLE I MEET ONCE THEY BREAK MY TRUST IT IS OVER FOREVER I DONT GIVE THEM A SECOND CHANCE ANYMORE .. AND I HAVE CONTROL OVER MY LIFE NOW AND I AM AT PEACE LIVING IN SOLITUDE ;)
And the way I learned a lot is through Jordan Peterson and I very much apologize if that is offensive to your page however I highly respect his knowledge and care for people in the world and spreading his knowledge like you so please take that as a compliment😊
When you forgive you heal a broken heart. IT will be the MOST empowering ACT you ever do... You are calling ur energy back.This is event that allows you to move past being a victim. How to forgive? Write a letter to each person that has betrayed / rejected or abandoned you. Part 1 - this is what you did. Part 2 - This is how I felt. Part 3 - I for give you. Then put the letter in water and let it dissolve. You cannot just think you forgive a person. There is a process or it doesn't work. PASS the test of the heart.
I'm not enough, I'm too much to handle. I am so heartbroken. I dontvwant to be here anymore. Why couldn't he love me. 💔 😢 all I want is him. I don't want anyone else. I'm so not better than anyone. My heart hurts real bad. I am alone now. I hate my life n pray to not wake up. I AM OLDER N HE KNEW I ONLY HAD HIM. WHY WASNT I ENOUGH , AM I NOT LOVEABLE. MAYBE IM JUST NOT ATTRACTIVE . 😢😢😢😢😢😢😢 HE BLINDSIDED ME. DEVASTATED ME . RIPPED MY HEART OUT , KILLED MY SOUL. 💔 😢😢😢😢😢 10:47. I LOVED HIM . HE MADE ME CRY ALOT . YELLED AT ME. BLAMED ME ALL THE TIME . I CANT GET OVER HIM. Kills me to think of him with other women . I'm alone , ive been staying to myself . All I wanted was for him to love me . 12 yrs on n off n after all I've done for him he just discards me like I'm nothing . Yes I thought if I did something different. 🤔 😢 I remember trying to set a boundary n he said to me. F. YOUR BOUNDARY. He set them n only his matters .
No 1. Self love. It is ok to love another person. If they are not up to your best wishes, you deserve better. Walk away, look after yourself. Your health gets affected. Life is too short to wait on regrets.
Walk away is what people always say!! Please say WHERE???? Find a community who supports you :WHERE ARE THEY?? SEARCHING FOR 50 YEARS you need money And lots of it And since narcs abuse you financially if you walk away You end up in other trouble Cause people esp MEN love to offer their unconditional help to give you a free room or take A shower in their house, or use the the washing machine Which never comes for free And if you don't take their offer You keep being dirty and smelly and people insult and sabotage you more cause it's so much fun to kick someone who's already down That's real life as a single woman on the streets No one seems to get that part!
What if it is your son.? My son is disrespectful towards me since getting this girlfriend. He’s been disrespectful for the past 3 years. He’s aggressive towards me and his tone is unkind. I initially I was heartbroken. Now I avoid my own child.
I was just going to ask, what about my daughter when your comment popped up. I just recently had to make the terrible decision to stop communicating with the most precious person in the world to me. I will not lock this door but nobody is worth giving up who I am.
Maybe the only time this might not be applicable is when a PRESCRIPTION Fentanyl addicted daughter is mean and without consideration; then another time, nice and like her old self. It is a completely different scenario, if this is the case, as they don't realize how bad they have broken you. What does anyone else think, here?
There is an ungodly amount of repetition in this. I do agree with and appreciate every point that is mentioned, but I don't need to hear something over and over again absorb it. This entire speech could be condensed down to 5 minutes or less, and still hit every single point that's mentioned in this 41 minute video.
"People don't break what they value". Tony ROBINS
I really needed to have heard this truth 50 years ago. At the age of 24 I had finally gone no contact after a lifetime of Narcissistic abuse by my mother. It only lasted a few months and she contacted me apologizing for her controlling and disrespectful actions. Against my better judgement I continued our relationship and of course the criticism, shaming and abuse continued until she passed. Biggest mistake of my life. As Tony says, returning to a relationship of abuse just further deepens the trauma and affects all other relationships.
Listen to abraham hicks,
If you believe in things are not coincidence.
Listen to her words xx
So sorry to hear you suffered so much at the hand from someone who was meant to care for your well-being.
I hope you can heal and know that you are amazing ❤
@@Emily-q2zwhat a nasty reply!
I had the same experience although I found out much later. I was badly brainwashed and gaslit.
Thank you for sharing. I've not spoke to my abusive mother for 20 years including my brother also abusive and violent. Our father recently passed, July 10 2024, my brother was there, my step sister said in conversation, my brother feels alone after dad's passing and thinks all is well between himself and me. I said no i can't go back, the violence, abuse, lies, I have compassion for him, I also forgive him. I've been pondering do I reach out to him and I've been confused, so praying for a sign. This answers my question, now I feel relief. ❤
This came to me at the perfect moment. I have an ex that treated me terribly and now they want to come back into my life. I was considering it up until now
Never let them back, no matter "HOW SWEET AND APPOLOGETIC" they are!!!!! NEVER - next time, it will be a lot worse! Mark my words.
Coming back means they ""can't change"" that's why they want to come back. Leaving means they must change, and the need to return is the tell they can't change. The same program will be served by them, as before. I tried that 1 year back, Same shit just days later.
They? It's more than one?
People complain about the Algorithm but sometimes I’ve felt it actually wants to help me.
I agree! When a person leaves you broken, it’s about a choice, their choice. People do what is in their heart to do. I accept their choice and move forward with my life. Their acceptance or rejection of me does not and will never define me!
Surround yourself with people who’s faces light up when you walk in the room they are the ones that you want to be around ❤❤❤
Your only broken, if you allow yourself to be broken. People who mean you no good if you allow (will stomp on you, walk on you, and maybe spit on you. Don’t be nobody’s door mat). Stand strong.
Life is about forgiveness.
Life is about Standing Up for yourself and not allowing someone to mistreat you, always forgive , never forget and move on , Let Go
Get back to us after you have dealt with a pyschopath, a real one. Being broken is not a choice, the most dangerous destroy a persons sense of self before they realise what is happening. PTSD is very common in domestic violence survivors.
This reading is like a fine wine. I am taking it in word by word. It's exactly what I need to hear. I'm going through a traumatic experience with an ex, and I've been thinking (and made to feel) that I'm not good enough. I'm going to have to keep this one and listen to it a few times to truly internalize all the important points made here.
Never take back an ex or anyone who ghosts you. They run off “to play” and then blame you. If someone disappears for 3 or more days remove them from your phone and your life.
Yeah... My ex has BPD :).... Cheated on me, and turned around to call me a cheater... Now she's monkey branched, most likely other hoovers will come... But yeah, for her the 1 year and a bit didn't mean shit, instantly changed, literally, personality and all... She did me a favor but yeah....
100% true.
Thanks so much
Had a friend ghost me I’m clueless to why.. But they are nothing to me now just a stranger
@ 🙏
Listened to this twice for it to sink in.
Perfect timing with what I am currently going through. I am still on the fence, but this talk from Tony is helping make my decision.
Thank you. I needed this this morning.
Sometimes people break up hoping their mate see the light.
But if they are stuck, it is hard for them to understand their own potential. Tried assist with helping secure job but lack of follow through was useless, This was why I Broke up but later regretted.
Good guy but something was going on and he failed to explain after 10 years. Very private person. As they say set someone free if they come back yours to keep.
He has stated I never go backward. Thx to this video🙏🏾
Really related for this reading thank you for amazing reading to make my self more strong to not looking back my back because its so hurting but now my mind is very clear that not deserve to give a second chance thank you universe
Let them think they broke you. Always keep your peace.
Amazing speech and it crossed my path for a reason....nothing is coincidence!!!
Me, except this is my dad. My entire family. It’s hard to accept that having nothing and no one is better than accepting my role as the family scapegoat without complaint.
I'm in the same situation but it's our brainwashing and gaslighting; our mean inner critic is not ourselves but a recording of the voices of our childhood.
The scapegoat role is for life within our families. They can't see us in any other way but they don't know us. We will continue to be the scapegoat everywhere we go unless we heal and we can't heal close to them.
@@Lyrielonwind❤❤❤ thank you for the wisdom
@@brendaholidayI'm a senior mom, and in your same situation with my daughter. Wish we could talk.
@@dlemmon1276I’m so sorry. I don’t wish it on anyone. 😢
Me too
All facts u speak u give me more power to move forward i cut the cord with him even more thanks for this
Thank You ! This who hurt , treated me badly unjustly terribly in the past without a second thought or a bit of human conscience and critical thinking about their actions and what they heard from… now I after I lonely have made a lot of effort and time , with God’s grace and blessings to heal and strengthen me to recover my wounds and losses, pains, and evolving, they all now wants to manipulatively come back to my peaceful and better life. Thank you for the valuable advice at the right time after my good heart and big consideration in how you treat them good not to hurt them as an empath . Now I am very clear and have clarity for what u must definitely do and protect myself and my family for the rest of my life. Never Give them the unnecessary good treatment and Forgive Them , Let them Go never welcome them back even in my soul my heart! Set my strict principles and strong solid boundaries!
5.16
I needed to hear this: ‘you might love someone deeply…’
My son is 50 yrs old …he along with his partner have a history of disrespecting me and his late father …realizing that this was a perpetual pattern and choice of their making …a consistent choice to hurt and still want the last word to overpower his aging parents by manipulation has led me on a path of reflection ….someone he can take his frustration out on whilst remaining in denial …hugs and love to my fellow travelers along our pathways ❤
😢 thanks so much. I needed this. A diamond is still a diamond even though unrecognized ❤
Exatamente, nunca se esqueça do motivo de sua partida.
This video is so profound. Thank you Tony, your integrity, wisdom and grit is inspiring. Thank You again, Amen 🙏
It's not Tony Robbins, it's A.I.
Sometimes.... repetition is needed. Having a hard head, this is needed. Thank you for the reminder. Makes me want to cry. Thank you.
It's ok to cry. It releases cortisol and feeling your emotions is much better than repressing them because they get stuck inside.
Awesome motivation! Showed up at the perfect time - to reflect back to me how much I have grown in my self-worth and self-respect.
"If someone isn't capable of reflecting your worth, turn away and look for those who are able to so with ease."
I go back to them because I have nothing left to break.!!
I understand your statement
I needed this ! The best motivating speech after being treated poorly and devalued for 24 years im starting over. Thank you 🙏
🤝
Yes you can
2nd sign I move seen today and years of conflict
Brilliant. Thank You forever Tony!
I so, so needed to hear this right here in this very moment. 🙏 ❤
Downloaded this to always listen as a reminder to myself😊and new subscriber here,maraming salamat 😊
Love this, I lost my mentor as a child, and let every one of these negative traits infiltrate my life, slowly I’ve been learning how to better myself.
This cements all I know and more, thank you endlessly.
Another perspective on the topic is educating yourself about dark manipulation and all the tactics and manipulation forms that people are so capable of and it's very very scary how real and often people are purposely manipulating honestly every single day and every single way possible. I'm living proof, I'm here today because I'm grateful for what I've learned have come very far, I'm not going to snow at all LOL however please educate yourself! And we are all one we are all collective! I hope everybody loves everybody, one day set a time. ❤
This speech came in time !
For 11 years, same patern over and over again. His love and care, was transfer to his friends, pastor church. He learned to lie and deceived me. He lies so much that he is going to counseling, and it doesn't matter and can't see himself in a mirror. He failed to protect me from harm and dangers from his pastor and church. The pain is overwhelming. I had done so much for this man and forgot to be grateful .
Sometimes it’s not that some one brakes you. It’s you’re being too weak and insecure, so any one can brake you with very little effort.
Sometimes strong people just don’t realize they might hurt someone with the words they choose.
Learn to set boundaries and always let people know when they cross the line.
Love this just helped me make decision
If you want to have value…have values. It requires sacrifice. More accountability…less entitlement.
I just went through with it. For 11 years repeatedly.
They will never forgive us but, it's important for us to forgive them and be free.
amen!!!!
This applies to a business and industry.
Thank you for the wisdom 🙏 I needed it! Needed for you to remind me !❤
Hi Tony, thank you for this , youve conveyed such a crucial message in the various scenarios this happens. i know this as i had stayed in a abusive narriage for 32 years , i finally managed to walk away and it felt like i was waking up from a self induced coma.!
I completely get your message about the intracacies and challenges one faces or endures to get to this point of finally walking away.
Thank you again, for raising this much needed awareness,
🦋🙏
Thank you so much for the valuable information ❤
Definitely learned a lot listening to this… been going through it for to long
Happy feast. May mother mary bless you
Absolutely correct somehow. Nailed it
Thank you coach!
I never let people back. They always will be thrown away for testing. I dont doubt that they are permanently like that at that time, and the time that they want to comeback.
I will make every wrong right.😊
I agree 90%, but think a marriage might be worth a few extra tries..
I did back to him again broken several times within 5 weeks very deeply…..the pain inside me doesn’t know how to come out from this feel something wired and empty heart
Thank you very much for this important advice it’s very helpful ❤❤❤❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏
Much appreciated thank you 🙏 🙏😊👏👏👏
Amen!
I HAVE TO DO THIS WITH SOME PEOPLE I MEET ONCE THEY BREAK MY TRUST IT IS OVER FOREVER I DONT GIVE THEM A SECOND CHANCE ANYMORE .. AND I HAVE CONTROL OVER MY LIFE NOW AND I AM AT PEACE LIVING IN SOLITUDE ;)
Lack of Money limits choices
And the way I learned a lot is through Jordan Peterson and I very much apologize if that is offensive to your page however I highly respect his knowledge and care for people in the world and spreading his knowledge like you so please take that as a compliment😊
Don't sthe where break you constantly
Thank you ❤
GREAT KNOWLEDGE HERE ... :)
Thank you for this❤
That song, “ya find out who your friends are”
absolutely never! Lord i forgive them it's done !
Amen 🙏
I love it❤❤
Verdad
When you forgive you heal a broken heart. IT will be the MOST empowering ACT you ever do... You are calling ur energy back.This is event that allows you to move past being a victim. How to forgive? Write a letter to each person that has betrayed / rejected or abandoned you. Part 1 - this is what you did. Part 2 - This is how I felt. Part 3 - I for give you. Then put the letter in water and let it dissolve. You cannot just think you forgive a person. There is a process or it doesn't work. PASS the test of the heart.
I'm not enough, I'm too much to handle. I am so heartbroken. I dontvwant to be here anymore. Why couldn't he love me. 💔 😢 all I want is him. I don't want anyone else. I'm so not better than anyone. My heart hurts real bad. I am alone now. I hate my life n pray to not wake up. I AM OLDER N HE KNEW I ONLY HAD HIM. WHY WASNT I ENOUGH , AM I NOT LOVEABLE. MAYBE IM JUST NOT ATTRACTIVE . 😢😢😢😢😢😢😢 HE BLINDSIDED ME. DEVASTATED ME . RIPPED MY HEART OUT , KILLED MY SOUL. 💔 😢😢😢😢😢 10:47. I LOVED HIM . HE MADE ME CRY ALOT . YELLED AT ME. BLAMED ME ALL THE TIME . I CANT GET OVER HIM. Kills me to think of him with other women . I'm alone , ive been staying to myself . All I wanted was for him to love me . 12 yrs on n off n after all I've done for him he just discards me like I'm nothing . Yes I thought if I did something different. 🤔 😢 I remember trying to set a boundary n he said to me. F. YOUR BOUNDARY. He set them n only his matters .
You are not alone! 14 yrs for me😢
Leave.
I've been there but when you love yourself the way Jesus does, you will choose yourself and you won't look at them the same, more like not attractive
Let him go for good!!
No 1. Self love. It is ok to love another person. If they are not up to your best wishes, you deserve better. Walk away, look after yourself. Your health gets affected. Life is too short to wait on regrets.
❤
I am unbreakable
Walk away is what people always say!!
Please say WHERE????
Find a community who supports you :WHERE ARE THEY??
SEARCHING FOR 50 YEARS
you need money
And lots of it
And since narcs abuse you financially if you walk away
You end up in other trouble
Cause people esp MEN love to offer their unconditional help to give you a free room or take A shower in their house, or use the the washing machine
Which never comes for free
And if you don't take their offer
You keep being dirty and smelly and people insult and sabotage you more cause it's so much fun to kick someone who's already down
That's real life as a single woman on the streets
No one seems to get that part!
Just a suggestion but your title for this video really should have "has" added. "Never go back to somebody who" has" already broken you."
💖
And what do you do if it is your own daughter? Just BROKEN 💔 How do you not go back to that
100%
🙏👌👌👌👍💯👍❤💐
What happens if it's your dad??
What if it is your son.? My son is disrespectful towards me since getting this girlfriend. He’s been disrespectful for the past 3 years. He’s aggressive towards me and his tone is unkind. I initially I was heartbroken. Now I avoid my own child.
I was just going to ask, what about my daughter when your comment popped up. I just recently had to make the terrible decision to stop communicating with the most precious person in the world to me. I will not lock this door but nobody is worth giving up who I am.
What if those people are your family?
Family is who holds you at your weakest turn not who broke you.
What if it is your daughter?
Maybe the only time this might not be applicable is when a PRESCRIPTION Fentanyl addicted daughter is mean and without consideration; then another time, nice and like her old self. It is a completely different scenario, if this is the case, as they don't realize how bad they have broken you. What does anyone else think, here?
So vz I guess I can't go back to you,
Of course not
Are you really so zik
Nobody is broken, people are not made of glass. What story you trying to tell? Sounds like a bogus falsehood tale.
The American people who voted for Trump did!
God bless DJT
There is an ungodly amount of repetition in this. I do agree with and appreciate every point that is mentioned, but I don't need to hear something over and over again absorb it. This entire speech could be condensed down to 5 minutes or less, and still hit every single point that's mentioned in this 41 minute video.
Fake. They are all fake mate.
I’m 15 minutes in and leaving. A find many of them are like that
It’s AI
Thank you ❤
You're welcome 😊