Matt Rife Hilariously ROASTS Your Dating Profiles | Cosmopolitan
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 มิ.ย. 2024
- Would you let a celebrity read your dating profile 📲 - and critique it in front of millions of people?? Well, Cosmopolitan's new series Read My Profile is ALL about it. Today, we asked comedian Matt Rife to examine dating profiles YOU submitted, and he did NOT hold back 😳 . Watch along as he lets us know if these responses and photos would be a swipe right... or a HARD pass 😂 . Stay tuned for more Read My Profile coming soon. 🔜
Love Cosmo? Then come join our ~ elite ~ members-only crew. Sign up for Cosmo Unlocked: cosmopolitan.com/joinus 🔓
✨COSMO SHOWS✨
Secret Talent Test • Kpop Group MONSTA X Is... 🏆
Expensive Taste Test • We Tortured ‘Stranger ... 💅
Hot Girl Travel Tips • Comedian Naomi Watanab...
Drip or Drop! • BTS Reacts to Their Fa... 💧
That's So Emo • The Cast of Outer Bank... 🦄 😝 💯
Nobody Asked: • Mark Tuan Reveals The ... 👀🙊
The Breakdown • 'Yes Day' Star Jenna O...
The Braid Up • Double-Loop Box Braids...
Cosmo Queens! • Mayhem Miller | COSMO ... 👑
🚨 SUBSCRIBE to our channel and be the first to know who we're hanging with in our studio: th-cam.com/users/cosmopolitan?... 🚨
Catch us everywhere:
www.cosmopolitan.com
Instagram: / cosmopolitan
Twitter: / cosmopolitan
Facebook: / cosmopolitan
TikTok: / cosmopolitan
And in your mailbox! Subscribe to the real deal here: csmo.us/goCcMTY
#MattRife #ReadMyProfile #Cosmopolitan - บันเทิง
“Wanna plug the tour?” “Everything is sold out” is such a flex lmao
I really wish I could have gotten tickets
Took the words out of my fingers! (':
savage move.
Hah ya, found that out when I went to look at it a few weeks back.
😂
"what in the BLACK MIRROR is she talking about??"
😂
Definitely talking about the movie ‘The Prestige’
That Black Mirror comment had me rolling!😂
It's one of the best series out there!
@@amandajoslin-kk5zc Star Trek?
Actually, it's true. At least the version of teleportation being worked on so far. Look up particle entanglement and quantum teleportation.
Me looking at Matt for 12 mins straight is already making my day
Ours too 🤪
Unreal.
For sure 💯 he's really pretty
GIRL YOU AGAIN
Same 😂
I’m in love with the first girl, she is gorgeous.
She looked like such a fun person too
I agree. She's so cute. The hair and the septum. Also seems so fun. 💗
I really appreciate how respectful he was when dissecting the women's profiles.
Except when he talked about the second girl and questioned how she can afford her trips suggesting “she might have nice feet”.
@@tiagomaqzher occupation is not there obviously in this day and age it’s alarming because so many girls are on Onlyfans, strippers, prostitution. You can’t really put that on occupation cause no guy is gonna take you serious unless guys who j wanna smash
this aged the same as rotten fruit
@@llamagaming8498lmao whyyy
@@olugboyeopeyemi2428hes a huge misogynist lol
"everything is sold out" - lol
I'm just some random guy who thinks Matt Rife is super funny, and while this video was definitely not meant for me - I watched it and enjoyed it.
So glad you liked it!!
How did Hannah, 24 turn into Selena, 27💀🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣💀💀💀💀
Me too 😂
I know that was so annoying lol
I saw thatand was like wait me?!?!
I’m glad someone mentioned it
I was coming here looking for this comment. cause like, huh!? crazy oversight in the editing process
I wanna be friends with him. He's so funny 😂
You can be his friend for the price of a lunchable!
“Everything’s sold out”
"If something dark happens ~ are you the person I can laugh through that with?" Solid advice. Look for that!
I saw loads of clips of Matt but never really stopped to watch any of them. Glad I clicked on this! He has such a genuine and sweet personality and he's actually very funny and that is rare for a male comedian these days lol
Rare for a male comedian? Are you from Earth 2.0?
He isn't that funny tho. He's just charming and attractive with decent jokes
Wish he saw this "rare" comment. Anyone that follows his comedy knows what would follow that from Matt...... 🤣🤣🤣🤣
It’s even rarer for female comedians to be funny 😂
@@Steve-hu8px not true Steve 😂 I'm sorry your mom did such a terrible job raising you. Sad boy
Matt: The backward hat is frat boy vibes
Also Matt: puts a shirtless pic of himself on his profile while talking about his gym bro lyfe.
As much as women say they hate it; most don't
most do, you’re not a woman, you don’t know
100% if there's a shirtless photo or you're holding a fish... I'm out@@Captain_Insano_nomercy
he said that the most he would show would be a tank pic so im guessing the editors did that.
@@m.a.1874 if he's a man, and he has relationships with women, and he's posted shirtless pics of himself which attracted a respectable amount of dates, then he would know.
“6ft so really 5’11” is soooo true 😂
Every girl needs to have a boyfriend like Matt
Whaaat😳😅😅😅
I totally agree
boyfriend* not brother.
@@winterycold I edited my comment
Frr
I want to hear how the date between Briana and Matt went 😁
“Lumêr from beauty and the beast”😭😭😅😅
Omg I had this conversation about teleportation with my friend! She went into the theory of it that you're essentially cloning yourself and killing your last version which is just. Wild.
Yup, it is! And makes you wonder...what happens when not all of the information is transferred to your clone 🤔
Woooahh
The same was said about photographs way back in the day.
@@joycechacko8207 with every beam you could eradicate all illness
@@lastskywalker2481 Wow! I didn't think of that. That's another application, I guess. But would they be able to achieve that kind of control? Right now, it's not in their hands, like how much data is retained. Maybe with better technology and knowledge, they could do as you said. But wouldn't actual cloning be a safer option?
I actually thought this was super helpful. Appreciate it. I have really haven't done online dating, so will try it. It's super interesting how a person comes accross in just photos.
10:22 the fear in his face when she said that 🤣
yea I thought she was going to be someone on staff he'd already dealt with that day like someone in hair and make up or something.
“Everything’s sold out” was so smooth of him 😎
“Everything is sold out” 🤣🤣
It's so funny to me that someone can be deathly afraid of the dark while I'm here unable to sleep if there's even a hint of light on. 🤣
I'm terrified of the dark but also can't sleep if there is light on 🤣🤣
This is me... 100% Not even a dot of light. I bought cover stickers off Amazon to hide my computer lights, and have blackout curtains but then in the day I have big windows and love the natural light hahaha
Same
@@hyrum3759are we the same person? I love big windows! Just not at night :D
legit same@@hyrum3759
I thought he was gonna say his irrational fear was heights 😂
Lol right? We watched him on TFIL
That's a rational fear lmao
Me too 😆
matt came a long way from WildNOut. Nothing but respect for mans
I learned about that teleportation thing in philosophy class and she's not wrong lol
Ship of Theseus?
Tell me more! Saw it in a film, interesting to know it's based on some earlier work
Dissing wearing a hat backwards, when he does that all the time 😅
the way all his prompts was literally what i would’ve answered is kinda scary
also the tank top pics were very much appreciated thank u matt ✊🏽
10:59 I’m not someone who is into this but I may need Matt to try on a cowboy hat with this outfit combo…🤔😂
He’s too pretty!! I swear sometimes my brain is like “okay there has to be something wrong here because his face is too nice!!” 😂
Matt, you and Brianna would look CUTE TOGETHER!!❤
The fact that he said he loves otters. I love otters!
Matt should have a Chicken Shop date with Amelia. It'd be funny and cool!
It’s great to know that I’m not the only adult who’s scared of the dark. He would match well with another female comedian.
Which female comedian?
He is hilarious! I've done the same thing on dating apps lol It's more of a roast fest than a seeking someone. I don't think i could take anyone seriously on a dating app. I'm old school, stop me in the street and say hey. PS, Matt, i fit your dating age bracket, i'm a mom and i always have snacks 🤣
That last line’s not creepy at all 🤣
No it’s not creepy. Matt specifically said in a show that moms are the best to date because of snacks! 😂
Brianna looks cool
@@Joy-xe6df In that case… I’m a mom who always has snacks too lol
Yes! Same to the “roast fest” lol. When I was single my best friend would come over for a girls night in, we’d drink wine, and laugh at all the ridiculous messages we received and roast profiles- some of the stuff was wild 😂
Was this a roast? Dude was the nicest, had thoughtful feedback, cracked a few jokes along the way. I don’t think they know what a roast is over at Cosmo…
When he said 2am it immediately was 2am on my clock. So powerful
"Like he's checking his blind spot in 28F" 😂😂😂
To think if Matt Rife didn’t make it in comedy he would be in a trailer with multiple baby mamas 😂😂
LMAO, my opening line to him would be:
"hate to burst your bubble but as a former wildlife nurse, otters are not fun to work with. Never meet your heroes."
Aww, what a fun and snarky man. Love Matt, I wish him all the sucess in the world. Update for the tank top shot. 👏👏👏👏👏
Matt, why are your prompt answers just making me love you more? Lol
this series is so funny!!! please have more of this
All those pics of him and yet the biggest flex is "Everything's sold out" 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥💪
I just continue to love him more and more. Hilarious
Me, a Southwest flight attendant: 😮😂. Had me cracking up lololol
Glad to see him doing fun stuff like this. He won't hold back that's for sure.
Love this so much!!! He’s the best
At 3.10 her name is Hannah, 24 and 6.04 her name is Selena, 27? She aged 3 years and changed her name in under three minutes.
I thought I was high and hungover when I saw it. But then I realized I don't even drink or smoke 🤣🤣🤣
they messed up the video. you can hear him say “sorry hannah” at the end of the selena bit
You're 100% right about the second girl. Super classy
Matt seems like someone I would like to know...
Swiping right at “otters”! I love otters eating stuff with their hands. Swimming all fluidly. Holding hands so they don’t float away. I really identify with them 😆🤪
I like how chill he is 😍
Everything's sold out. LMAO 😂
I'm also afraid of the dark and have tv on all night. This was very fun to watch. ❤
So glad you liked it!!
Do u keep the light on as well? I’m scared of ghosts in the dark watching me sleep. Or someone coming out from under the bed to grab my feet ..
@ABC-ed8cg I have some flameless candles in the room and leave the bathroom light on which shines thru my whole tiny apt. Lol. I've had some experience with dreams and thoughts going through my head hours before the event happened. I've had feelings of being tapped on the head where I'm living now, but not feeling scared by it at all.
did anyone notice at 6:05 the name changed to "Selena, 27"
yes that was so confusing!
"24 years of age" = Red Flag. 👁👄👁 "How dare you be 24??!!"
You are awesome! Been watching vids for three days!!
once you see him in wild n out you never see him the same way again. the change is GORGEOUSNESS
My first official date was a matt rife comedy show at Dec, and it was sold out for this yr!!! We wanted to do it for our anniversary. We love him so much!!! The sold out part was so real, I checked like back in September and it was sold out the whole year. Happy for him tho.
The way he hated Hannah 😂
The second one 😂 "legs crossed (sometimes)" 💀 i would've been done, too lmao
Even the people behind the camera are laughing.
Brianna I have had that EXACT worry since freshman philosophy😂
Super funny! Started watching him 6 months ago. I have 2 sons his age and he reminds me of both of them! ..Keep doing your thing and make us laugh!,, Granny is addicted to his shows and videos. Rock on Matt!
"Ghosts will think he has guests(with tv on) how cute❤
"ESG consultant" "Nightmares are better than dreams" he truly is the bad guy.
I came back and realized the window joke on the airplane was part of his ‘Natural Selection’ on Netflix! Love this guy!
He’s so hilarious 😂 I love him
At 6:55 is that his hair or a hat? lol he kinda looks like he’s rockin “The Bob Ross” hairstyle 😂😂😂
The woman born with 12 fingers could've been the greatest pianist in the world!
I know everyone is in love with Matt because he looks great and is funny, but I love him because of his love for otters
I love how he confidently said "everything is sold out" at the end😅
You wanna plug your tour? "Everything is sold out"
FLEX!!!
i love how he said the same bit about the blind spot and 28F as his shows😂
I def didn’t expect to see my old coworker as the first profile 😂😂😂 bamboozled
I think Matt would be the perfect person to help you find your significant other
Side hustle could be Matt Rife's Dating app
Significant otter *
hhhhh I’m going tomorrow to see him. I can’t wait! 😭🎉
The like button is broken. This have me belly laughs. Thanks Matt!
Morning Matt😊 Having a Wake n Bake and coffee ☕! Thank You for the giggles
ONE OF THEM WAS MY COLLEGE ROOMMATE OMG
can we get a part 2😅
Super excited to see you in Durham on the 27th!!! 😆😆😆
This is soo me 😂😂 i too play songs to feel like im not alone to ghosts
Coming from a 2020 dateline fan and actively on a dating app 😂 This so me!!! Talking or thinking out loud on the type of stuff men post 😂
I always roast dating profile when I’m on Tinder swiping 😂
7:28 oh please I would so win that every time
I absolutely loved your roast . I would swipe right on you instantly
I agree. Mario Kart would be a fun first date. Yoshi is my favorite! ♥️
Yoshi was my fav character in the day lol.....yosshhhiiii...gulump
11:22 what about lunchables? 🤣
I was literally talking on the phone with my homegirl about how everyone should have their profile pics be exactly what they look like when they wake up in the morning lol 😂
I would mop the floor with you in Mario Cart.
I *would* try to find a way to actually challenge you but I love your content and would hate to see you cry.
Lol
Love your stuff - ty
Awesome video ❤!
I just love Matt ❤❤❤❤❤
"where can we find you?" "Oh everythings sold out" this legend lol
Loooove this, and so funny. Matt ❤
Coming from someone who's very very picky, I agree with him. The more genuine you are about your personality, hobbies, work, the better the chances of finding someone you can click with.
As for humor, I adore roasting people, HOWEVER, people seem to fail to realise that the more I roast them, the more I care for them, means I'm comfortable being me around them 😅😭 Because to total strangers I'm usually super nice and welcoming because I don't want to push borders, we ought to be at least that much polite and respectful since it doesn't cost us anything...
That is so weird: I'm a huge fan of Rife's work, and think he's very handsome, and love his mannerisms, but wouldn't swipe right on the profile he put together.
Not weird, I feel like he kind of did almost everything he said no about other people's profiles
hadn't thought of it that way! @@wind10miko
"What business are we talking about?
Wall street or OnlyFans"
Had me rolling 😂
The Lumiere from "Beauty and the Beast"!!!!😄😄😄😄😄