What Suicide Feels Like by Bipolar Major Depression - World Suicide Prevention Day

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 841

  • @dzhettblek5615
    @dzhettblek5615 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +17

    It's lonely, painful & misunderstood disorder. I hate my life, I'm rarely happy, I put on a facade that I am just to fit in.

  • @ritishroypatroo7075
    @ritishroypatroo7075 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +18

    For me depression/bipolar or any other debilitating mental illness is like a Cancer, but one in the mind. Eating up the cells of our soul.

  • @bush2571
    @bush2571 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +25

    I am struggling bad with mental health and suicidal thoughts. People around us try to help but they don't understand. If I don't make it through this at least after watching this I know I'm not alone in these thoughts and feelings. Thank you for opening up

    • @kelseymathias3881
      @kelseymathias3881 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      you are not alone....it hurts a lot....I know

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      You absolutely will make it through it. Very tough for our loved ones to truly get it. Thank you for the kind words and please hit me up on instagram to connect and share more.

  • @RoshannasRhetoric
    @RoshannasRhetoric 3 ปีที่แล้ว +353

    It’s been a horrible life that I didn’t even ask for

    • @falafelfelipe-9849
      @falafelfelipe-9849 3 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      keep on going! life’s not over. look at nature, recognize its beauty and let it fulfill your heart. please overthink the decision to wanna end it all.

    • @RoshannasRhetoric
      @RoshannasRhetoric 2 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      @@falafelfelipe-9849 thank you. I’m still here ❤.

    • @alisonmorgan6600
      @alisonmorgan6600 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      I said this to my mum once. " I never asked to be born". She just looked at me and said " don't evah say that to me again".

    • @Elonmuskateer
      @Elonmuskateer ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Love you! Enjoy the really simple things, nature … animals, get a cat / dog? Really simple things , try meditation, you’re loved

    • @brandonheston8608
      @brandonheston8608 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Same my friend i hate bipolar

  • @frasermorrison7657
    @frasermorrison7657 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    Was 40 in December and I live with this daily , I'm so tired and just want to sleep and go .

    • @SirSonic900
      @SirSonic900 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Don't know if you're still out there. But please don't give up. God promises a better future very soon. Revelation 21: 3, 4, and 5 tell us this. I encourage you to pray to Him. He will hear you.

    • @dianaisaya4644
      @dianaisaya4644 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@SirSonic900Amen,I believe so

  • @LeonHough-b7g
    @LeonHough-b7g 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +15

    Suicide is the worst feeling in the world i swallowed like three bottles of pills once and almost died it hurt so bad. And the worst part is the days leading up to just laying in bed and drinking and not showering

    • @JB-ChildOfYah
      @JB-ChildOfYah 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      This exactly what my daughter just did. She’s been in bed, won’t get out of her room, not showering. 4 days ago, she swallowed a little over 60 pills. They pumped her stomach and saved her life. She’s in the mental health hospital as I type. If you’re still feeling like this, PLEASE get help. The suicide helpline is a great resource! You may not realize how much you mean to so many people but I’ll bet they’d be happy to help you get help. Those feelings mean something needs to change in your life. Figuring it out may take a little therapy but that’s okay! Even “well adjusted” people see therapists. We live in a crazy world and everyone needs someone to talk to. I pray you’re doing okay today! 🙏🏼

    • @Alaskanman
      @Alaskanman 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​​@@JB-ChildOfYahHave you ever used a suicide hotline? Please don't perpetuate that narrative just cause it's a "suicide hotline". People whom are ready to die won't be convinced by words but people whom don't really want to die just needs someone to listen to them. If you have a loved one you can trust, talk to them instead and get support... not from a stranger unless it's a last ditch effort. The hotline might put you on hold for 20-40 mins... like me. You have to understand that it's like any other hotline and people are constantly calling. I gave up and prepared to pull the trigger, the one thing that stopped me were the image of my loved ones persistently flashing into my head. I've also heard horror stories of cops suddenly showing up to your door and ending up in a psych institution... have you ever worked at a hospital and seen how they treat psych patients?

  • @davisanaiz6742
    @davisanaiz6742 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    I came across your video and suffer from depression. And you are so right that it comes in waves. Been battling this affliction since I was 15 years old

  • @hadi20233
    @hadi20233 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +20

    Hello, I watched your video with tears streaming down my face. I'm a mature woman who has always suffered with mental health, suicidal thoughts & have twice gone down that road. I'm still suffering. There's more to this but I don't want to expose everything on TH-cam. I'm alone & I'm struggling. I wanted to say what a lovely person you are.

    • @joegeekohler
      @joegeekohler 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      You are not alone… breathe. You are worthy ❤

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Hey there Hadi. I’m glad my video resonated with you. Really helps to know you’re not alone and that others are surviving. Gives hope that we all can survive and continue surviving.
      I’m sorry that you’re alone and struggling. Feel free to hit me up on instagram at iamrjhen if you want to share more.

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Thank you for sharing this.

    • @SSuinn-mg5es
      @SSuinn-mg5es 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      A friend mentioned ect treatments worked n meds didn't

  • @beckylarsson393
    @beckylarsson393 5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    Thank you for sharing. Im bipolar and what I struggle with the most is the fact that I know that these depressions always circle back. Even when it's good, I know I'll fall again. I've stopped talking to anyone about this because I know there is nothing anyone else can do about it. Thank you for letting me listen a few minutes to a fellow struggler.

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Never stop talking. If you continue to talk there's always the possibility of something new happening, something new discovered, but one things for sure... You'll never know if u stop talking. It sucks to talk especially when you're going through it but it's the best thing for you. Hit me up on IG at iamrjhen. I'm always here to listen and or talk. You're not alone 👊🏽.

    • @estherstone4860
      @estherstone4860 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Talking releases an internal pressure valve.

  • @riarivers-hilton7985
    @riarivers-hilton7985 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Never ever rely on others to make you happy!!

  • @justmadeit2
    @justmadeit2 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

    It’s the most terrifying thing to see what is happening to yourself and not being able to stop it. I’m 49 and just so tired of the pain and self loathing. Im scared, yet I’ve already been in a psychiatric ward for 3 weeks recently. I felt worse in there. Im long term unemployed and have people who care about me including my 18 year old son who lives with his mum. Sadly I can’t hold on to that to pull me through. I crave peace of mind and proper sleep

    • @crownmae9834
      @crownmae9834 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I pray you get the peace you desire ❤

  • @kylemaki6510
    @kylemaki6510 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +37

    Death is a gift, life is punishment and suffering.

    • @dianaisaya4644
      @dianaisaya4644 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      What

    • @খোঁজ-ঢ১প
      @খোঁজ-ঢ১প 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Death is a gift, life is punishment and suffering

    • @weaverdreams
      @weaverdreams 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Life on earth is full of pain & suffering. But life in heaven will be joyous.

    • @charlesmenzies8153
      @charlesmenzies8153 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Yes especially when we love our partner been together many years then in a blink of a second they leave and be with someone else...... actually we never recover from betrayal and heartbreak

    • @sheriricci7589
      @sheriricci7589 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Too true! I completely understand the phrase

  • @reggieking1045
    @reggieking1045 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    I'm glad i found this video and i hope you're still with us. I identify with a lot of what you went through and i'm in crisis now but i'm seeing a doctor about it this week instead of bottling it up and trying to deal with it alone. Like i said i hope you're still alive and in a better place mentally and thanks for sharing your story with us. It must have took a lot of courage to do that so i send my love and respect to you Sir.

  • @ryry8288
    @ryry8288 6 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    RJ...You have become a very important part of my life no matter how small you think you are contributing to it. What you are doing is the bravest thing I've seen a man do in all of my life. Every single person who watches this will be touched by your words and empower every single one of them. I love you man...

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Thanks dude! Sorry for the delay in responding here and thanks a TON for the love, support, and well-received words.

  • @KingTheJim
    @KingTheJim ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Its feels like a constant life of being knocked down and rebuilding, ive lost everything good in my life because of my mental ilness, its really tough just surviving at times. I think about not being here everyday and i cant help it i feel real deep shame and guilt for not being able to help people i tried to save from themselves, i see there faces everyday when i sleep, i lost the love of my life because i didnt know how to handle all of it, ive never had family to help me she was all i had, i never got help because i was scared to admit what was going on. She left and im on my real journey now of healing. I think about her everyday, i live by myself now and have been in and out of hospital, i feel like im broken forever. Im tired of being tired of this shit. I have ptsd, bipolar and schizophrenia, the latter of which i never told anyone about because i was scared everyone would think im mad. Im gonna be okay, ive survived an attempt last year and i know i need to be here and things will get better for me, all you people out there going through this same shit, please stay strong man we all gotta live, just get by man do what you can, it dont have to be big, just survive man i know it will get better. I love you all.

    • @Simplymesf123
      @Simplymesf123 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I understand you. Being exhausted by it all and feeling like why the hell bother?

    • @lynnkay133
      @lynnkay133 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I love you and Jesus loves all us broken ones. Wait for Him and your key to His beautiful kingdom of paradise

  • @denisecox3125
    @denisecox3125 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I’m bipolar and have had a lot of triggers recently. I was at a 8 today. Nobody understands mental illness. My family thinks I’m self absorbed and selfish because I’ve had 2 suicide attempts . I’ve educated myself to recognize when I’m cycling low and can usually ride it out but some family drama and the loss of a good friend to ALS TRIGGERED me this week. Thanks for reminding me it’s the illness and not my weakness. ❤️

  • @justmadeit2
    @justmadeit2 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +16

    Does anyone else stop eating properly and stop sleeping properly when they are at their worst with depression ?

    • @PheladiMphahlele
      @PheladiMphahlele 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Yep. It's common since there's an imbalance in your hormones and your circadian clock.

    • @weaverdreams
      @weaverdreams 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      There’s a patient health questionnaire with 9 questions called PHQ-9 which is used to determine how bad someone’s depression is. Look it up and take the test and give the results to someone who cares in your life or to a doctor. They will see to it that you get help. Look into TMS therapy. It has an 83% success rate helping people with depression.

  • @heather-vs9qe
    @heather-vs9qe 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    Yes not wanting to be a burden 😢

  • @mariascott9101
    @mariascott9101 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +22

    People never care people are alive but once someone dies your loved

    • @HELPforPain
      @HELPforPain 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

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    • @mojo_joju
      @mojo_joju 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I care. Can i be your friend?

    • @h.nicolejorgensen2077
      @h.nicolejorgensen2077 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      It can feel like this. I often feel like that. What makes you feel loved?
      ❤❤ Share what you feel ❤❤

    • @lorrainesmalley2268
      @lorrainesmalley2268 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I am just finding this to be true😢😢 4:24pm

    • @mariascott9101
      @mariascott9101 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Playing my cello and my daughter makes me feel loved

  • @isabella635
    @isabella635 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    I drag my feet every single day. This is a profound sense of desperation 😢😢😢😢

  • @JoinLiparini
    @JoinLiparini 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    This is a great message. I have been struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts daily for the past 3 months. Nobody understands

    • @ChefB1618
      @ChefB1618 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      I also have been struggling with extreme depression and suicidal thoughts and I attempted suicide in March 2024. Hope you know that I actually know how you feel. Good luck 👍.

    • @Akiodio
      @Akiodio 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Stay strong guys 🙏

    • @lynnkay133
      @lynnkay133 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      It's not so much that they don't understand but Ive learned that they do not care about those of us who are struggling and sick

    • @Skye75
      @Skye75 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I understand

    • @ChefB1618
      @ChefB1618 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @Skye75 Thank you for understanding. Life is a struggle right now and hearing your heart felt comment is appreciated. It's nice to know that I'm not alone.

  • @lucidlabyrinth
    @lucidlabyrinth 5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    I've been looking into suicide lately, and was pretty astonished and heartbroken to find that it's every 40 seconds.... yet nobody is talking about it. Why?! I search it on TH-cam and the most popular searches are "suicide squad", "suicide girls", etc.. it's so sad.

    • @lukewilliams7061
      @lukewilliams7061 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Because everyone always acts like we don’t die so they block it out due to in denial.

    • @GavVable
      @GavVable 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I agree, I believe there are answers - I certainly need some right now, The only reason I haven't done it is cause I don't want to go to hell, even though it feels like I'm living it

  • @Goodideame
    @Goodideame 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

    I'm so sorry if anyone reading this feels like ending their life. I know what it's like when things feel unbearable. I'm trying to accept that 'doing my best' is just surviving another day at the moment. What's the reason to survive? I suppose it's because we never know how things will turn out - we might even find ourselves in a future where it was worth sticking around.

    • @OtterOsita
      @OtterOsita 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      You might be right. - Thank you.

  • @RoshannasRhetoric
    @RoshannasRhetoric 3 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    I’m 41 and have suffered from bipolar disorder 1 and severe depression. Every day I feel like not being alive anymore. Life has no purpose, and they LIED. It doesn’t get any better.

    • @austinhousen1501
      @austinhousen1501 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Going through the same. I ignore the thoughts and keep going.

    • @donnamontgomery8127
      @donnamontgomery8127 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I'm bipolar 1 and I notice my life keeps repeating the same crashing cycles. I've lived and forgotten to take care of my mental and physical health. I've lost so much--mostly lost love that I am grieving. I feel that I have failed over and over with this illness and at 56 I'm tired. I wouldn't wish this illness on anyone (why I didn't have kids). This illness runs in my family...no one told me...I didn't understand the severity). The meds have caused weight gain to the point where I don't feel comfortable in my body.

    • @truesoulghost2777
      @truesoulghost2777 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      My mind is so bad now I stop breathing sometimes in my sleep. I’m 35. That’s how deeply imbedded it is in me.

  • @fayethchristina5494
    @fayethchristina5494 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    My son took his life on nov 10 22, this message, the way you describe your experience the depth of your words have touched my life, my heart in more ways than I can express. I needed to hear this, I will share this. Our family has been so devastated in so many ways since he has been gone. Thank you so very much for this message. This message is also saving me. ❤MPAE never forgotten forever loved. ♥️

  • @sarahmartin822
    @sarahmartin822 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I really needed to hear your story. I have fought with bipolar depression my whole life. Never been diagnosed until recently after a mental episode. The hardest thing I'm dealing with is I was so wrapped up in my mental breakdown that I didn't see that my son was spiraling into a deep depression. He took his own life on March 7th. Your story meant a lot to

  • @gavinmcclure8047
    @gavinmcclure8047 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    Unless you go through it you will never understand

    • @ChefB1618
      @ChefB1618 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I couldn't agree more. Bless you

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Soooo true

  • @BrookeRoss-v9y
    @BrookeRoss-v9y 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    BRO IF I DON"T DIE SOON IMA JUST SELL MY SOUL....Even though it'll be all fake love I'll have people around. Being alone for years at a time. It takes a toll. I just want to die man.....ASAP. I pray every night that I don't wake up.

    • @peaceofmindofpeace1650
      @peaceofmindofpeace1650 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      I relate. I really need ppl. If only a few. I have been alone to many days. We need love. We all need love like deserts need water
      Sending you a hug ❤ stay around.

    • @SSuinn-mg5es
      @SSuinn-mg5es 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Hope a miracle meds can help

    • @annt.7785
      @annt.7785 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Selling your soul is just a figure of speech. If you take the money and status away from those celebrities, they'd be living a similar life to yours now, just think about. I've said the same thing myself, because it seems like they get to live so freely and abundantly, but if all the things that God gave us for FREE, wasn't taken away years ago by wicked people who told us everything now has a price, we wouldn't need to "sell our soul", that should tell you that you're not the problem, we're not the problem. We THINK we're the problem, it's all a game and that's the depressing part about it.

  • @lizquinn3568
    @lizquinn3568 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    Depression is like struggling to live in a body with a mind that wants to die 😔

    • @urbansetter1
      @urbansetter1 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Depression is anger self hate shame isolation it stems from childhood trauma

    • @FiveMCity
      @FiveMCity ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I used to try and look at depression from a "fascination" point of view, though experiencing it, I was intrigued, and I wanted to document the stages. Then I got into the 10-13 year mark and I'm honestly burned out. But with that said, in relation to your comment, I've noted that people with depression don't really want to die, but want relief from their depression. There is no relief, so self-deletion is often the only answer it seems. Temporary depression is normal, it is when your brain forgets to turn it off, and then it becomes a problem. I also believe the longer an issue goes unresolved, it actually becomes a habit, referring to the habit of recurring negative thoughts. It is programmed or learned by our brain to do.

  • @Web3Prep
    @Web3Prep ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I really appreciate you sharing your story. I’m in a tough place. Mid 40s and I traded in so much of my life for an addiction that has irreparably changed my life. I’m so discouraged now seeking for God’s help. I’m a few months sober and the emotions are stomach turning. There are times that I am triggered and I become completely hopeless. I’m scared… and I’m full of dysphoria. The only thing I feel I still have left that gives me reason is my family. I couldn’t imagine facing this without them. I need help but can’t even find the energy to call someone. Praying daily.

    • @lisahall1989
      @lisahall1989 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I'll be praying for you. Remember This Side of Heaven we may not get fully healed, but he promises no more sorrow, pain, or suffering once we get to heaven. 🌻

    • @Web3Prep
      @Web3Prep 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @lisahall1989 thanks. Appreciate it. I'm doing a little better since writing this post. Still dealing with the emotions tho but I'm taking it one day at a time. Still sober. Thanks

  • @ThatGero
    @ThatGero ปีที่แล้ว +9

    When you have bipolar depression nothing gets better your doomed to fail at birth I was diagnosed in the 3ed grade now 32 years old and nothing has ever gotten better there no hope for people like us.

    • @lynnkay133
      @lynnkay133 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@ThatGero feel the same way, there's no escaping this disease. I've fought it since I was 15 yrs old, 62 now and I'm simply worn out from the battle if life. People have turned me off to the world, its the ones who say the love you and want to help you that will hurt you the most.the wounds never heal

  • @nodnarbleahcim5097
    @nodnarbleahcim5097 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    I just wish death was like a reset button or a respawn to a different life, but its just so final with nothing after. That's it. And not being able to get this so called love i wanted from the ones to whom i shouldve mattered to in life... it's why i can't go through with it even though it's all i want to do

    • @Ghhh-on3nl
      @Ghhh-on3nl ปีที่แล้ว

      Complete hear you.. you not alone. I feeling this more than normal and due to the holiday time. Let's set some goals for 2024 and fight another year. I'm hitting the.gym twice as hard this year. I gave up alcohol.

    • @dianaisaya4644
      @dianaisaya4644 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      God help all of us 🙏🙏

  • @hayleymcevoy4405
    @hayleymcevoy4405 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

    My mum.died of suicide and my partner I sure and now I am in a dark place I hope I can see the light .
    I pray ro god ro show me

  • @FiveMCity
    @FiveMCity ปีที่แล้ว +8

    The only advice I have for anyone struggling with major depression is to exhaust all help that is available. This means seeing a doctor, a counselor, taking prescribed medication, and stopping any addictive drugs. After that, you've seriously done all you could do. If the meds aren't working or therapy is helping, you have the right to want to go. I've done all the above, but I do not believe we've reached that level in medicine yet to fully understand mental health or how to treat it effectively. It will be decades before we reach that level to where people can feel normal again.

    • @mpilonhlengubane8081
      @mpilonhlengubane8081 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I'm currently suffering from hearing voices and movements in my head, mental health is something we don't really understand. I used to be a Marijuana smoker I quit some time ago, I'm experiencing thought broadcasting, auditory and now visual hallucinations, I've heard that people who have schizophrenic symptoms are sometimes people who have a history of Marijuana use.

    • @ilse-u6x
      @ilse-u6x ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Doctors don't give a shit!

    • @bryanhilton5131
      @bryanhilton5131 26 วันที่ผ่านมา

      gonna pay for that?

  • @latoryswanson9825
    @latoryswanson9825 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I had the cops show this week for a wellness check on me. I just stayed quiet because I don’t want to go back to the mental hospital. I just don’t know why I keep living. Why is life so painful? Why are we here ….just to suffer? I’ve been sad most of my life. 😢I don’t think I’ll make it the rest of this year.
    I’m glad to know I’m not alone. I love god but I’m just too tired. And this video is very relatable!

    • @wonderboyngubeni
      @wonderboyngubeni หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I dont see myself making it passed this year. I feel so worthless and useless. I have days where i dont even get out if bed. I am really in a bad place. I understand what you feeling because i am there too

    • @justinroller6880
      @justinroller6880 หลายเดือนก่อน

      100%

  • @blackdollar2009
    @blackdollar2009 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +18

    Pray for me!!!!! I have those feelings!!!

    • @afraalsamkari2445
      @afraalsamkari2445 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      May god save you from them.❤

    • @RoitiFiamate
      @RoitiFiamate 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Same here 😢😢😢 can't handle this no more

    • @mrsg6264
      @mrsg6264 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I am tired. This life thing is hard. I can't take it anymore.

    • @dianaisaya4644
      @dianaisaya4644 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      They are just feelings that's what I keep telling myself, and they will pass,I just have to live for my daughter

  • @nick5839
    @nick5839 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I just feel like my life has been one horrible joke. Sometimes I start crying and laughing simultaneously for minutes on end and I don’t know why. I just have these horrible thoughts daily man. I don’t even know what’s real and fake sometimes. I feel so lost and hopeless as if I am purposeless and I’m here for no reason man.

    • @lisahall1989
      @lisahall1989 ปีที่แล้ว

      You are fearfully and wonderfully made don't ever give up. Please start watching The Chosen series for hope. 🌻

    • @iankeating2341
      @iankeating2341 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lol​@@lisahall1989

  • @casey778
    @casey778 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    I want out of this nightmare!

  • @Rdafy
    @Rdafy ปีที่แล้ว +14

    The fact I didn't ask to exist, wonder why I keep holding on to this miserable life

    • @lzoltan70
      @lzoltan70 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Nobody asked for his/her own life... we didn't exist then... BUT there are some, literally just SOME people who see you...

    • @doreenplischke2169
      @doreenplischke2169 ปีที่แล้ว

      Sheer life force.

    • @moogs05
      @moogs05 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I’m so done with this life !

    • @lzoltan70
      @lzoltan70 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@moogs05 Life itself would be GREAT. It's "only" people whose first priority is to enslave others and create all kinds of systems to force their will to others. Greed and psychological warfare, basically. BUT every now and then we encounter good people who (can) remind us how it could (and should) be.

    • @Rdafy
      @Rdafy ปีที่แล้ว

      Nobody sees me

  • @gummyalex6708
    @gummyalex6708 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This makes me cry all the time, when i hear this and put it on loop. It makes me feel like it's not only me and my friends at school but it's more people that have more depression

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Absolutely. You're not alone at all. You're amongst a family of great ppl, winners, do'ers. You have something great about you and inside you otherwise you wouldn't have bullies. Haters can only see what's in front of them. Whoever cared about someone enough to expend energy and tk time to F with someone who was less than. There's something about you, in you that they envy, trust me on this one.

    • @riarivers-hilton7985
      @riarivers-hilton7985 ปีที่แล้ว

      🫠❤️

  • @FlexxG103
    @FlexxG103 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

    Trying my best not to give up on life😢

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  7 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Ugh. Flexx! You got this! Survive survive survive. I know I know I know… easier said than done. As much as I know and as many ways as I’ve learned to get bk happy again it all mostly still goes out the window when I’m in that dark place. Please try to find that light, that thing that reduces the “funk” and “cloud” and use it to come out of that low place.
      Hit me up on Instagram if you want to connect and share.

    • @ScaryScared-sq9si
      @ScaryScared-sq9si 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      please don't give up...if you need to talk, I'm here

  • @markhaynes3629
    @markhaynes3629 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    Everyday living is extremely difficult nowadays, there is a lot of pressure & internal pain that we have to deal with. I've suffered so much over the years with a lot of things at the expense with being let down by so called family,friends and a failed 11 year relationship. And on top of that being diagnosed with a potential Life taking disease such as postate cancer, it's not easy man I find myself feeling very empty & emotional 😢 it's tough man really tough.

    • @KristbjorgNymann
      @KristbjorgNymann 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I'm not you, but I understand your words. Suffering hurts. I have Borderline Personality Disorder, Mixed Bipolar, a Traumatic brain Injury that causes cognitive issues among other pains. Never had a relationship that worked, lost my pregnancies and can never have children. As for your diagnosis my very elderly father went through the same and is 10 years free from cancer. I have a 93 year old Korean veteran friend who was diagnosed with prostate cancer 2 years ago and he's doing well today. My favourite cousin, (3 years younger than me is a young mother) is ravaged by cancer throughout her entire body and is actively dying....and I think, "Why not me?" Not her. I understand every day is difficult. I hope you get well. I hope we all get better. Nature and animals help.

    • @mitch5222
      @mitch5222 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@KristbjorgNymann do u have anxiety?

    • @KristbjorgNymann
      @KristbjorgNymann 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      @@mitch5222 My anxieties have anxieties.

    • @mitch5222
      @mitch5222 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@KristbjorgNymann how to overcome sth that u are afraid of?

    • @KristbjorgNymann
      @KristbjorgNymann 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@mitch5222 Well, I have tried. For example, I have crippling Arachnophobia and I did pet a tarantula 5 times. LOL. But hopefully soon my therapist will put me on Ketamine infusions for my actually severe mental issues.

  • @Sage-kj1ik
    @Sage-kj1ik ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Nothing feels as bad as getting to the point of wanting to end your life. I’m there now i’ve never been this sad for this long and this much pain. I take pain killers and drink and drugs but they’re not helping anymore. I don’t know how much longer i can hold out , i’m tired of feeling heavy everyday, nothing feels good , i hate food nothing is good . I want to die but i’m holding on i won’t end it i just want this weight to go away

    • @PounceHeadBall2
      @PounceHeadBall2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Im about to go...

    • @devanteguthrie1541
      @devanteguthrie1541 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Man I feel this so much I'm struggling so bad I just wanna live for my daughter and make her smile but the suicide says let go I just can't leave her 🥺

    • @urbansetter1
      @urbansetter1 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Im going tp do it. Its an overload of childhood ttauma. 1000s of ppl that have had trauma in childhood have suicidal thoughts

    • @Sweetamber222
      @Sweetamber222 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I hope you’re still here. Please don’t harm yourself. I know it’s easier said than done. I found this vid because I’m going through it too, but you have to fight like hell. Overcome your inner demons. You are a prize, and that’s why they want you so bad. Even though I don’t know you, I know you are worthy of a life because you’ve been given one. That’s something we all have to remind ourselves of.
      I recommend you look for holistic solutions to heal/ relieve your depression. Detox your body and restore balance. That’s one step in the right direction.

    • @Sage-kj1ik
      @Sage-kj1ik ปีที่แล้ว

      @@psalm5175 mental i can’t shake this depression, it gets heavier everyday, it won’t stop its taking all the enjoyment out my life i don’t even want to face the light if day. I don’t want to wake up anymore but i will until i can’t

  • @Emmanuela69
    @Emmanuela69 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This is one of the most painful days of my life. I’ve been lied to, used, discarded, I’ve questioned my own sanity, been gaslit…I can’t anymore. I’ve fought for years, prayed, but nothing.. I’m done. I want out of this life

    • @Heidi_K_Girl_444
      @Heidi_K_Girl_444 ปีที่แล้ว

      Sending you Healing prayers and Angels. You matter. Hugs xoxo

    • @davedave8263
      @davedave8263 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I'm sorry this is happening to you. Make sure you try everything before you choose to end your life. Make sure you have exhausted the medication options, SSRIs, stimulants, ketamine assisted psychotherapy, rTMS, ECT, and many others that I have not listed. Make sure to try everything and talk with your loved ones each step of the way.

    • @lisahall1989
      @lisahall1989 ปีที่แล้ว

      Please don't ever give up. Please start watching The Chosen series

    • @dianaisaya4644
      @dianaisaya4644 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Just have alittle Faith in God and He will help you through this, can't say am well off but must attest that it has always been Him

  • @wonderboyngubeni
    @wonderboyngubeni หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I am considering it and so scared of these thoughts. I don't see a future or living past this year. I have lost everything and have nothing to live for

    • @devinlaughton4726
      @devinlaughton4726 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I'm feeling the same way now. Hope you're okay

    • @gingerspain423
      @gingerspain423 หลายเดือนก่อน

      It's not the answer, I can tell you that from experience. The moment you do it.
      you regret it. I couldn't do that to my children. I had this very vivid dream of them being informed of my death. I felt their pain . I don't think children really recover when a parent commits😢 suicide.
      This happened before I had children.
      You absolutely have a purpose here. You just don't know it yet. There is light at the end of the tunnel, and recovery is possible. With the right medication.
      And other means of dealing with it, you can have a happy, successful life.
      😌🙏💫⭐️💜🇨🇦

  • @brianjohnson19901990
    @brianjohnson19901990 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Reading this comment section and hearing others’ cries for help is painful. But if a lot of other people feel this way maybe this suicidal feeling is on the spectrum of normal human behavior. Maybe I’m truly not as alone as I once believed. And maybe I can find just a little bit of strength to keep picking myself up

  • @jplum7708
    @jplum7708 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I get off the train going to work and walk about 5 blocks to my office. I walk over a bridge that goes over a highway. I pause and watch the traffic below me and think how easy it would be to slip over the railing. I could time it so i fall in front of a semi going 55mph. My wife gets the life insurance. Pays off the house and has a good chunk to invest and is set for life. My brother would inherit everything from our parents and would also be financially free. Maybe a younger person gets hired to replace me and would make a good living and raise abeautiful family. So much good would come from just sliding over that railing.

    • @kassidywebb3809
      @kassidywebb3809 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Anyone who ever loved you will wonder what they should have done differently. They will feel a guilt that will never be silenced. Your wife will never love the same and will forever feel like she is drowning, but never actually die. Just the suffering of drowning day in and day out. Your will put your self out if misery but that misery will then spread like wildfire to those who love you and that fire won't be able to be out out. I'm sorry you feel like life isn't worth living but I pray that God deliver you from this feeling In Jesus mighty name.

    • @Sukipouz46
      @Sukipouz46 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      They don't want the money, they want you. You are loved. You are worthy of all the things in your life, the job, the family. I hope you can remember how great you are and that this feeling passes. I'm grateful for you sharing these innermost feelings. Thank you. I feel them too.

    • @ilse-u6x
      @ilse-u6x ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Relief from a fucked up world

    • @monicagarcia2100
      @monicagarcia2100 ปีที่แล้ว

      But God gave you life for a reason...find out why

    • @afraalsamkari2445
      @afraalsamkari2445 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      This is a real bad scenario. I hope you don’t do it. This is horrible 😮.

  • @jennagomez1088
    @jennagomez1088 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    I’m losing control. I feel so alone. Everyone thinks I just want attention.

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      You're in control. You are not alone and I don't think you "just" want attention. Are you on IG? If so hit me at iamrjhen and let's connect. I'm here for u and available to listen and share if need be. Remember, you're not alone, hit me.

    • @laraparks7018
      @laraparks7018 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hang I'm there..studying psychology and scripture helped me a lot.. And mindful self care..xo you are not alone in feeling that way..prayers for it to lift.

  • @ryry6339
    @ryry6339 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Hello. My name is Ryan. I like to say thank you for the message in this video. I've been very stressed out, and I've been having suicidal thoughts. My parents know about it, but they just assume that I need to just talk. But I need more than that, but they ignore me. My therapist tells me that I'm "Too young" to be feeling suicidal. And I'm just doing this for attention. No, I've been this way for years. It's only gotten worse, so why try anymore? My parents never ask "Are you okay?" or "How was school?"
    I haven't heard an "I love you" in awhile.. I haven't gotten a hug in weeks. I feel alone.

    • @nararabbit1
      @nararabbit1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Hey I just wanna say there’s no age at which you “shouldn’t” feel suicidal. Many times it is chemical, not a choice on the part of the sufferer. Who would choose to feel that?! I’m sorry your family and therapist won’t take it seriously. All I can say is some days it’s all you can do to get through it, and it’s terrible, but there will be good experiences in your life as you get older and I hope you stick around for them even though it’s challenging. You aren’t alone.

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hey there Ryan. Sorry for the long delayed response. I haven’t gotten on here in a while. Are you in a better place now? What’s the latest in your world?

    • @samusaran7317
      @samusaran7317 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@nararabbit1 Depressive realism is a thing...

  • @Jay_Segoviano_WC
    @Jay_Segoviano_WC 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Sad that it’s been 5 years since an upload. This man understands.

  • @christopherleubner6633
    @christopherleubner6633 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    Having known a few people that did it, it's haunting. You wonder if there was something you could have done or should of done. On the other side the attempt felt strange. It's a combination of numbness and a feeling of relief. The act itself was surreal, almost like a robot taking the pills and washing them down one by one with liquor. Then jabbing a whole pen of insulin at the end. Then waiting for the end. There was no feeling of instant regret or sudden desire to save myself. Then blacked out and woke up in the bed covered in 💩 with a horrible hang over. The embarrassment and the feeling of failing at the attempt made me dead inside and feeling completely lost. I did everything possible to ensure sucess, told no one, made sure i was alone, the note was placed so it would be found during the clean up but not immediately 😢

  • @davidszweda4371
    @davidszweda4371 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Are you still going to do videos? These are great. My son recently took his life, and while it has been a challenge to process, videos like this really help me understand his thought process. There was no clue, even in hindsight that he would have done something like this. He even said he would never do something like this. It was an impulsive event that was preceded by his girlfriend breaking up with him. Your explanation on how it went for you, gave me some insight into his final moments. My mind does not struggle with depression or these thoughts, so it is hard for me to comprehend, but my heart truly reaches out to those who are struggling. Please seek help. Nothing is hopeless and there are a lot of people who do love you. I know it doesn't seem like that. I feel so bad that my son was stuck in his mind at this time. There were hundreds of people that loved him dearly, and we had no clue he was struggling, despite me having a close relationship with him. Reach out, seek help, do not give up!

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hey David. I got ur comment/message. I’ll respond here shortly.

  • @stephenpisarcik5828
    @stephenpisarcik5828 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Thank You Very Much for sharing the truth about mental health illness that can lead to suicide. My nephew chose to leave this earth in the last month. Unfortunately, family & friends did not know the depth of his despair in recent times. Thank you for mentioning Sept. 10th as World Suicide Prevention Day. Be Well, Therese 🙏⛪️✝️

  • @Alaskanman
    @Alaskanman 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    People say I have the eyes of an animal. I didn't understand it at first, but when I realized that I have bipolar 2 it made sense. I always have my fight or flight on. My body is always on ready to strike mode, but I can't help it. My emotions are extreme or I don't feel anything at all. The "predator" that causes me to always feel unsafe is my own existence

  • @ace6285
    @ace6285 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    Life is actually very short. Then it will all be over. Whatever your beliefs, for sure we will not be on earth in these particular circumstances again. May as well stick around for a few days more, because it will soon be over whether you like it or not. observe the misery.

    • @dahunkisuchiang9108
      @dahunkisuchiang9108 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Yes absolutely why take your own life just to reincarnate here on earth again rather just be patient cuz sometimes suicide thoughts is temporary until things get better again remember life is short and everyone will pass sooner or later .just hang on

  • @icyivy2424
    @icyivy2424 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I really feel this...
    Battling depression since 2005...
    It's too hard...

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hey there. Thanks for saying that. Yeah you’re right. It is hard but we’ve all got this. How are you feeling these days?

  • @notneeded6877
    @notneeded6877 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Life is not for everyone. I am forced to live because others selfish needs. What I can do for them is all that matters they show no love, I have to beg for signs of love. They stopped me from killing myself when I was 22 just to put me through another 20 year's of misery. Not worth it for me.

    • @morningstar7774
      @morningstar7774 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      You sound just like me. I feel desperately bad for you. what you said breaks my heart. No one should ever have to feel like they have to beg to be cared about. Humans need love. I have suffered also from over 2 decades of abuse. I understand you. Please don't feel that there is no love in the universe. I just started a bible course with Jehovahs Witnesses. What i learned is that soon only good people will share this earth, and everyone will care and love one another according to the bible. God wants us to be happy and live forever . Psalms 37:10,11,29. I have been wanting to take my life for a long time.. but when i learned these things i learned that life does have a purpose. That was everything to me. Take care my friend. :)

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Bruh 👀. If their beliefs in God are helping them be a better person a better human being I’m not sure that it matters if God is real or not.
      I salute all who are still fighting to stay alive and those who are left behind.
      Not sure if you’re going through anything currently but if so hit me on Instagram at iamrjhen. Let’s connect.

    • @morningstar7774
      @morningstar7774 ปีที่แล้ว

      @g513 I know it’s hard to see that he is considering all the horrible things going on .. but Satan is real also and it’s His fault this world is so horrible. I feel bad and my heart hurts for you my dear brother because I know u must be in so much pain … the Bible says keep conquering the evil with the good. That means that there is good in the universe, something to hold onto . All this suffering is temporary. The Bible says that things will be so wonderful in the future that we will not even remember our pain. God will also bring back to life people who have died. John 5:28,29… there is justice waiting in the future… I know u don’t believe in God but if you give the Bible a chance maybe your faith will change. 🌻🌻much love .. agape

    • @morningstar7774
      @morningstar7774 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@RJHen it does matter RJ because he is the only hope we have. Have u read the whole Bible? The message is one of peace and hope. We believe in a new coming paradise earth 🌍. A brotherhood of man. That is what is true that is what is reality. Matthew10:29-31🌻🌻🌻 please meditate on that scripture my dear friend. If you ask God RJ to reveal his love to u He will. 🐣 he knows your heart is very delicate as all of us are.. he will deal with u in great kindness if u ask with sincerity to show you the way.

    • @veronicaatkins4417
      @veronicaatkins4417 ปีที่แล้ว

      I sadly can relate to this feeling

  • @Jkl306
    @Jkl306 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Ending the anguish .. Ending the non understanding the being called crazy or emotions. Its hard to be misunderstood

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hey you! Thanks for the comments here. How are you doing these days?

  • @johnpastore7685
    @johnpastore7685 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I am so happy that you are here, bro. God bless you. I will pray for you. I know actually what you went through. I also almost killed myself, a few times.

  • @ZeNaTy-hg4zd
    @ZeNaTy-hg4zd ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Psilocybin containing mushroom saved my life. it made me to quite illicit pill addiction after three years and it has also helped me to survive depression.

    • @Elizabeth-yx2ti
      @Elizabeth-yx2ti ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I was having depression and this constant, unbearable anxiety because of university stress. Not until I came across dr.chris356, a very intelligent mycologist.He saved my life honestly

    • @oliwia-ix5iz
      @oliwia-ix5iz ปีที่แล้ว

      ​@@Elizabeth-yx2ti I'm feeling the same way too. I put too much on my plate and it definitely affects my stress and anxiety level. I am so glad to be part of this community.

    • @AliRamo-xc2ox
      @AliRamo-xc2ox ปีที่แล้ว

      Shrooms was the best trip I had. It was an amazing experience.

    • @Elizabeth-yx2ti
      @Elizabeth-yx2ti ปีที่แล้ว

      ​@Aldair-kq5ztYes he is. (dr.chris356)

    • @craigfaria
      @craigfaria ปีที่แล้ว

      Can dr.chris send to me in ohio?

  • @jumpman858
    @jumpman858 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I want to thank you. My brother took his own life 11 months ago and he jumped, which we believe was a because of a psychosis episode and drugs. I felt like you spoke to me as if my brother survived it. Thank you so much.

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Man I’m truly sorry to hear that. I’m really glad my video gave you some answers and maybe comfort.

  • @valentinahernandez7291
    @valentinahernandez7291 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    Sad to say, it's gotten worse. Now someone dies from suicide every 11 seconds, and it's the second leading cause of death in a much younger age group - 10-14-- 10!!!-- and 20-34. Heartbreaking.

  • @brucealmighty7288
    @brucealmighty7288 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Good video,
    I have lost my family via divorce. My ex wife moved in another guy who isn't bi polar, more consistent, and makes more money. The only person who speaks to me is my 10 year old son. My 13 year old daughter says she doesn't want to speak to me. It has been two months since I have spoken to her. I see her when I pick up my son, and she waves and goes on. My significance is over.
    I am 50, broke and alone...I pray all the time for God to take me home. I think about suicide but to much of a little bitch to do it. I also can not really talk with very many people about this as if my ex-wife finds out. I will never see my kids ever again.

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Oh wow. Sooo sorry to hear that. Life can be extremely challenging at times. Especially when going through a divorce. I was married for 14 years and my first trip to the ER and a mental health facility was when I was going through the divorce and separation. Definitely a tough time.
      I’m here to tell you that it does get better. I promise.
      Hit me up on IG if you want to connect or talk. Also would highly recommend talking to a therapist regularly.

    • @brucealmighty7288
      @brucealmighty7288 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@RJHen thanks

    • @deborahclark2558
      @deborahclark2558 ปีที่แล้ว

      Bruce…How are you today?…Your post resonated with me

    • @brucealmighty7288
      @brucealmighty7288 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Deborah Clark Hello, thank you for checking, and sorry to ramble on. Things are the same, but I am focusing on me right now. I have a counselor and am trying to find one good thing I am thankful for every day..

    • @AlPacenis24
      @AlPacenis24 ปีที่แล้ว

      I feel your pain, but it's coming from a different place. I hope you're well Bruce

  • @urbansetter1
    @urbansetter1 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Doesnt make me feel betrer others are in this. It makes me want to get out more

    • @ozzmosis6544
      @ozzmosis6544 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      me2

    • @FiveMCity
      @FiveMCity ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Haha me too. Knowing others suffer doesn't make me feel any better, it just makes me feel bad for them and me too. Knowing I wouldn't want anyone else to suffer like this.

  • @RobinsonKambi
    @RobinsonKambi 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Just feel helpless,this was my worst Easter;Twice had written a suicide note and ready to end it all.. close friends and family been talking to me ,hate just hearing "everything will be fine" been fighting so long just tired and worn out

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Sorry to hear that bro. I responded to your other comment. Sooooo glad you wrote this second comment. Means you’re still fighting to live. Let’s connect. You can continue to comment here but would be better if you could hit me up on Instagram @iamrjhen

    • @darkchild5
      @darkchild5 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Keep fighting I know how you feel I am bipolar and I’m in jam now it’s not east and you wanna give up but don’t try to hold out for another day

    • @truesoulghost2777
      @truesoulghost2777 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Easter is the worst for me now because it is just a reminder of a day my life changed forever

    • @Jay-rb6er
      @Jay-rb6er 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Still here

    • @MBsUtubey
      @MBsUtubey ปีที่แล้ว

      Year later here🌸🍃 How are you?~•🕊️

  • @timenow5312
    @timenow5312 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    So I smashed things all over the house, even things of memories, because I got angry, I have had more than enough horrible negativity, being accused of bad things, even being sacked at work after 36 years, I was innocent, but the guilty kept very quiet. I just ask.......What the hell have I done to deserve all this hostility and negativity and loneliness. I served on active service for my country in the 1970's, and since then, I just want to make the world a better place, but still the loneliness continues. I ask again, what the hell have I done to deserve this, when horrible people live happy lives.

    • @despatrick5602
      @despatrick5602 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Sorry to hear this

  • @renaelynn6376
    @renaelynn6376 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    My whole family hates me, my 2 old bros shunned me from the whole family the day my Dad died. I feel like I want to die soooo bad. How could my own flesh & blood beat the spirit right out of me?

    • @nerselaydin911
      @nerselaydin911 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      it not you dear it them what the meaning of their birthday?

  • @RemainWoke
    @RemainWoke 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    You haven’t posted in a while, I pray that you’re ok and in a better place!🙏🏽❤️

  • @tango2365
    @tango2365 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    I’m going through this right now i want to but at the same time I’m scared 😢

    • @blessed-are-the-broken7068
      @blessed-are-the-broken7068 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Same❤️. I’m with you

    • @blessed-are-the-broken7068
      @blessed-are-the-broken7068 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Danny Dolan Today started out rough. It’s strange, but as soon as I get to work, I’m much better. Now, I’m off the clock and I’m low again. It’s exhausting. I get so aggravated at every little thing. It’s hard to maintain the relationship I’m in because of my meltdowns. He’s very understanding, but the guilt I feel for acting out is eating me alive, and all I want is to be by myself. I feel I’m too damaged to be good for anybody else, and it’s a tragedy. If this is what it’s like ON medication, I’d hate to know what it would be like off of it at this point. I’ve overcome so much that I’m told I should write a book. No one would believe any of it had it not been for my family who’ve witnessed it all. A “success story,” they say. None of that means anything when another wave hits. It doesn’t mean anything when you feel pressured to be at a 10 when you’re at a 2.
      I’m thankful for this channel. And thanks, for asking, Danny. How about you? How are you holding up?

    • @blessed-are-the-broken7068
      @blessed-are-the-broken7068 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Danny Dolan I absolutely plan to. Hopefully I don’t mess this up. Hang in there, and if you ever need some support, we got you! We aren’t alone, none of us❤️

    • @JesusSavedMeFromASuicideAtempt
      @JesusSavedMeFromASuicideAtempt ปีที่แล้ว +1

      We are in Same boat just different seats..✅💯

    • @ivinpineda1193
      @ivinpineda1193 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Me neither

  • @shaylabetancourt8145
    @shaylabetancourt8145 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    It breaks my heart to know that humans suffer like this. I'm so sorry for anyone that has to deal with depression and suicidal ideations. I know is sounds like BS but you are loved. I love all humans and I value your lives. I know what it's like to struggle with depression and sometimes I want to give up too. But I know I'm not in this alone this. Many of us are struggling. You are not alone. Love you all, we're in this together. 🩷

    • @ericmontgomery7339
      @ericmontgomery7339 ปีที่แล้ว

      You are too sweet. 😊 Keep hanging in there. I'll try to do the same.

    • @MISNM0
      @MISNM0 ปีที่แล้ว

      You wrote a beautiful post.

  • @caitlink9374
    @caitlink9374 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    You are so fucking worthy. You are not a failure. You’re an amazing human being that deserves to still be on this earth.

  • @tbone541
    @tbone541 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    For along time I have strongly felt a sense of worthlessness... Every day and night

  • @gregdoty7746
    @gregdoty7746 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I know the feeling! I go through it everyday! I have good days and way more bad days!

  • @tbone541
    @tbone541 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I have been feeling that way for over 25 years

    • @CHEZZAD1
      @CHEZZAD1 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You are important. Reach out if you feel alone.

  • @RoitiFiamate
    @RoitiFiamate 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    Tears😢 same here sometimes I want to take my own life😢

  • @STEVOLOVESTHAILAND
    @STEVOLOVESTHAILAND 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Lost my mother and brother to suicide, I'm now in a very bad place right now, thank you for sharing

    • @dava73
      @dava73 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      SteveO so sorry for your loss. I’m feeling much the same. Can’t stop crying today. Don’t want to be here anymore. Gotta try and be strong though. Hope you’re ok?

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Steve O... Your mother and brother will always be loved. Guess what though... You are not your mother or your brother. You are not stronger nor are you weaker or an equal. You are uniquely you and your place in this universe is here and now. In a bad place you say? I know a thing or two about those dark places and as a matter of fact I just came outta of one... Hit me up... I'm on IG as iamrjhen . I know how hard it is to reach out to others when you're low son I take my hat off to you for even posting here. Please muster up enough strength to contact me on IG. Lets talk about it.

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Davanan you too, please reach out to me on IG at iamrjhen. Don't go at it alone.

    • @dava73
      @dava73 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      RJ Hen Thank you. I did. Still here. ❤️

    • @STEVOLOVESTHAILAND
      @STEVOLOVESTHAILAND 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@RJHen why me? I'm so freaking tired of hanging on, exhausted, everyday 😢 just need the pain to stop

  • @kennblock1
    @kennblock1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I dont wanna be alive anymore, just been putting it off tbh.

    • @Demon1800e
      @Demon1800e 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I hope u are still here. Please one day at a time.

  • @jaredanderson7203
    @jaredanderson7203 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Stand barefoot in the yard for one hour a day to ground yourself of toxic energy. Then fill yourself with inspiration. Fight to carry on. Search for one reason to live and you will eventually find it. I’m not taking my life today because my kids won’t be better off without me. They’re already without me. My illness separates them from me. My perseverance to change for the better, is what will reconnect me with them. That’s why I struggle on. That’s why I must get better.

  • @tbone541
    @tbone541 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I'm ready to give up every day

  • @jessparsons8515
    @jessparsons8515 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    Through depression I’ve wanted to do away with myself but I had two small kids at the time they stopped me acting on it

  • @maggiebeltaa5421
    @maggiebeltaa5421 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    You may have just saved my life right now. Thank you

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Wow 😳. Soooo grateful you ran across this video. You're supposed to be here. Grateful you are. Please reach out to me on IG at iamrjhen. Would like to know more of your story. Please share and Be well.

    • @maggiebeltaa5421
      @maggiebeltaa5421 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@RJHen Thank you so much for your reply. It means more than you will ever know! I am currently not on social media due to my mental health.. Which I think is important to me & important to mention. Sometimes we need to do what's best for us to make ourselves better & sometimes that means taking a step back & taking inventory of what really matters to us. I watch your video every time I'm having a bad day & it truly helps me. Words can't express the significance of that. ❤Thank you again!

  • @Plagueheart
    @Plagueheart 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    I think about this alot, honestly I don't like reaching out for help because I did before and IRL friends ghosted me when I tried to talk about my problems

    • @Simplymesf123
      @Simplymesf123 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I’m listening ❤

    • @Plagueheart
      @Plagueheart 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@Simplymesf123 thank you, appreciate it

    • @Simplymesf123
      @Simplymesf123 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Same

    • @weaverdreams
      @weaverdreams 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Dont tell friends. Text the suicide hotline. Or people here. We care. ❤

    • @redgereges-dl2el
      @redgereges-dl2el 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      We are here❤

  • @matthewmaxwell1416
    @matthewmaxwell1416 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I was diognosed with bipolar 6 months ago after 23 years of battling everyday, the mania shoots you through the roof and the crash from that throws you so low that your trapped in your own world in the bottom of a pit with no way out, your gripped with worthlessness, hate, anger, pain everything you thought you had has gone and it's just you and suicidal thoughts because you really can't see no way out, it's so intense and so realistic, it's hard for anybody to fully understand how it feels unless they have experienced it, but talking helps them understand where you are with it and it does help. I've self harmed and attempted suicide on more times I care to imagine but nothing matters

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      How are you doing these days? Stable?

  • @BEACHDUDE71
    @BEACHDUDE71 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Sometimes it's the only choice

  • @1995Auburn
    @1995Auburn 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Relate to this so much. Was diagnosed bipolar a month ago. My whole life or at least since i was 14 ive always had little things blow out of proportion in my mind. I start feeling like the world is against me and no one cares. Its such an empty feeling and when you fenuinely feel like you're worthless damn right you will consider killing yourself. Youre not in the right frame of mind. Youre present there but feel like an outsider in your own life. Thats how i feel at least. Im motivated to started making my own videos about my story, and struggles with suicide, depression and mental illness in general.

    • @RJHen
      @RJHen  6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Wow!!! Sorry that I'm now just reading this but I can not even express into words how much this comment means... I'm actually now going through that wave... And was trying to explain to my girlfriend but your comment captures it perfectly. I wasn't supposed to read this 2 months ago. I was supposed to read it now. Thank you and much love. Let me know ur channel too btw so I can subscribe.

  • @Bianca-Crystal
    @Bianca-Crystal ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Lucky those Who leave this fucked up world

    • @omg28374
      @omg28374 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@bigyoutuber0150Nobody is immune to life’s horrors. Beauty and wealth won’t protect against cancer and other horrific medical conditions. Anything can happen on this planet, and we’re all going to die one day. I don’t want to die a natural death because it’s torturous, and I don’t want to be the victim of some horrible crime or die on the streets. I don’t want to live with debilitating depression or suffer from chronic hallucinations and paranoia. And I don’t want to be a burden on others who actually have a life to live.
      Every person should be able to say when they’ve had enough of life without feeling shame or guilt or having people try to convince them to love life no matter what they’re going through. That’s pretty offensive. You want to live your life, live it; but don’t try to make value judgements about other people’s opinion on life. Don’t tell them that their suffering doesn’t mean anything.
      Human are insane, sadistic monsters that haven’t even legalized what should be a right for everyone, not just some domesticated animals: euthanasia. It’s cheap, quick, painless and effective. Why are people still suffering needlessly? What a disgusting waste.

    • @redthenomadicscribe1909
      @redthenomadicscribe1909 ปีที่แล้ว

      Agreed

    • @joecheffo5942
      @joecheffo5942 ปีที่แล้ว

      I agree. @@omg28374

  • @DailydoseBM
    @DailydoseBM ปีที่แล้ว +2

    You've touched another soul today my brother. Thank you for this story. The butterfly effect of this thing is crazy. Had you given in and taken your life that day that would have been the end of your untold story. Miraculously, by fighting through those feelings of worthlessness, you are mending hearts to this day. Thanks for being a voice for the voiceless and never forget that this video saves lives. Thank you for turning your darkness into light for the world ❤😊

    • @melamarcy
      @melamarcy ปีที่แล้ว

      I pray he’s still here 😢

  • @Theo13136
    @Theo13136 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    What is the point of going on. The Life that I have from the day that I can remember is full of suffering. There is no oasis in the horizon.

    • @zambooka10
      @zambooka10 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Feel the exact same

    • @gemmawalker5137
      @gemmawalker5137 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I literally can't go on.....every day cry...... begging god to take me 🙏😢

    • @Rama1288
      @Rama1288 ปีที่แล้ว

      ​@@gemmawalker5137same here I m 24 but due to social anxiety, depression,heart break I don't want to live any more ,I can't tolerate this pain anymore before my birthday I will kill myself

    • @alineted108
      @alineted108 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Rama1288 when is your birthday? Do mind texting me?

    • @gemmawalker5137
      @gemmawalker5137 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@alineted108 2/08/84

  • @tsheidrick
    @tsheidrick ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I just want it to all end

    • @RyanHenderson-qk5bp
      @RyanHenderson-qk5bp ปีที่แล้ว

      Same this my life is not worth liven anymore child hood was great used abused then discarded l hate myself

    • @joecheffo5942
      @joecheffo5942 ปีที่แล้ว

      It's kind of a piece of shit here. @@RyanHenderson-qk5bp

  • @waymilky442
    @waymilky442 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Not even that "everybody will be ok but that "everybody will be better".

    • @MISNM0
      @MISNM0 ปีที่แล้ว

      Everyone includes you, you precious Soul.
      The world is better with YOU in it. Not just for others, for You!!!
      🫂🫂🫂

  • @deemays12
    @deemays12 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    There's nothing like it. Quite unimaginable not only to those who've never experienced it, but also to those who have felt its wrath.

  • @bigjoe119
    @bigjoe119 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Thank you for your story, it struck a cord.
    Obligation to family, friends, kids, is a torture to carry when your mind and inner self wants you to just stop feeling. And the guilt that you live with for feeling so awful, for wanting to take the life you promised to your wife, your kids. How can I, the father of 2 beautiful kids, husband of a beautiful wife consider suicide as an answer. BPD type 2. Medicated, dedicated and striving to find the solution to resolving the broken cog in the machine set to self destruct. To all those in similar situations, I wish you all the best of luck and hope you find the answers to some of the questions that stalk us.

  • @zahorim627
    @zahorim627 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I have suffered from bipolar II for 20 years and I can't do this anymore. I just can't.

    • @lzoltan70
      @lzoltan70 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Maybe you can go down to the roots that caused your "bipolar"... Check out Andrew Feldmar!!

    • @zahorim627
      @zahorim627 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@lzoltan70 haha I don't remember placing this comment, but I will listen to him. There are to many truths and there are too many lies. But thank you for responding.

  • @NovaEnigma
    @NovaEnigma ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Im hanging by a thread. The only reason im still here is because of God and my parents. But still it is so difficult to keep going

    • @ebokaitoo
      @ebokaitoo ปีที่แล้ว

      😭

    • @Angelwings598
      @Angelwings598 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I feel lost, broken, crushed. This mental pain is suffocating 😢

    • @AshLey-cb8yx
      @AshLey-cb8yx ปีที่แล้ว

      😢

    • @mpilonhlengubane8081
      @mpilonhlengubane8081 ปีที่แล้ว

      Keep going. Do you keep a journal?

    • @NovaEnigma
      @NovaEnigma ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@mpilonhlengubane8081 I dont keep one but im still fighting and much better actually.

  • @jaysantanaofficialmusic
    @jaysantanaofficialmusic 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    How am I suppose to speak to my parents about how much I want to die I’m their child …their child hates their life and feels he needs to take his life to do the world better

    • @Allen77x
      @Allen77x 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I know what youre feeling and trust me ive been there, bit you have to remeber that god loves you and theres hope in youre future. Your life matters and if you feel like you have no one just turn to jesus in prayer, fasting and reading the word and let him transform you. Youre life matters, dont do it

    • @weaverdreams
      @weaverdreams 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Reach out to anyone you trust. Try TMS Therapy. 83% success rate in conquering depression.

  • @sakshamchoudhary9203
    @sakshamchoudhary9203 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I have been a horriblr person and burden to my family so why shouldnt i vanish

    • @ekim051084
      @ekim051084 ปีที่แล้ว

      Many people think they're a burden. Nothing could be further from the truth. All that leaving would do is cause unfathomable pain on all the people left behind. I wish I would have talked to someone before I hurt myself. Now I am forever perminantly disabled from my attempt. I sit in a chair all day long every day and do nothing because I have a traumatic brain injury from my attempt.

    • @SuperVladdrakula
      @SuperVladdrakula ปีที่แล้ว

      @@ekim051084 "All that leaving would do is cause unfathomable pain on all the people left behind" Yes, but for now, those "people" are the ones causing unfathomable pain and demand others to just live with it... Why they are more important? " I sit in a chair all day long every day and do nothing" That sounds like a fairly average life, just sitting around, wasting space and doing nothing...

  • @Huckleberry500
    @Huckleberry500 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Suicide prevention day is in 4 days. Seems like an appropriate day to leave this horrible world.

    • @xskares689
      @xskares689 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      No!
      Please see a shrink.
      There's more to live for.
      Suicide doesn't stop the pain, you're only moving it to other people..
      Think of the lives you'll ruin , think of the force of a world without you in it... you're loved dear

    • @elizabethcastro4541
      @elizabethcastro4541 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Don't you hate when people say, "Think of those you'll leave behind" when there is no one?
      I've done enough damage here... I've tried in earnest.

  • @jaysantanaofficialmusic
    @jaysantanaofficialmusic 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I held so much of this in I think I’m doing the world good

  • @SamuelGlover
    @SamuelGlover ปีที่แล้ว +8

    If I die I die. I don’t think I’d be able to take my own life but I just wish I was dead. I’m 34 and still live at home. I have a job but it’s retail. I’m a failure. I’m on disability can’t live on my own. I’m just done.

    • @x_aureum
      @x_aureum ปีที่แล้ว

      keeping you in my heart, friend. its worth it to stay i promise.

    • @darlingnicki4813
      @darlingnicki4813 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I love you for your openness. Let’s help others experiencing the same….continue giving your truth and transparency. You’re here to make a change and a difference…. Please know this. You are appreciated and admired! ❤

    • @SamuelGlover
      @SamuelGlover ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@x_aureum thank you. I’m trying to keep going but it’s just so hard.

    • @SamuelGlover
      @SamuelGlover ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@darlingnicki4813 thank you I really appreciate it :)

    • @x_aureum
      @x_aureum ปีที่แล้ว

      nothing easy was ever worth doing.

  • @lachulaguerra5272
    @lachulaguerra5272 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    My son took his own life 11/04/2023 he will be buried on 11/16/2023 he was 29 yrs old 💔

    • @AnthonyYuenPang
      @AnthonyYuenPang ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I'm sorry for your loss

    • @ChanceInLove
      @ChanceInLove ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I’m so sorry 😞 I’m 28 and it’s been on my mind a lot.
      I know you don’t need to hear that. I’m sorry for your loss. God bless

    • @lisahunter2953
      @lisahunter2953 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I'm so sorry my condolences praying for you

    • @blackdollar2009
      @blackdollar2009 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I never realize this was so real