More like peacefully. Having lost that much blood , he was probably numb at the end , drowsy and just wanting to sleep but with the warmth of Eiji's words from the letter and the calmness of finally escaping his nightmarish life.
Ash’s alive...his death is unknown in the anime the creator wanted to keep him alive so she left his picture in color unlike the dead ones but he’s dead in the manga
Many people don't understand why Ash survived a lot of gunshots and fights but not being stabbed. Many people see that as something pointless. But I think it's much more complex than how simple it looked. I think Ash for a moment thought that he really had the right to be happy, to give up that life of killing to survive and take that flight to Japan. He ran to the airport, but in his low guard and filled in emotions, is interrupted by Lao and as usual, he immediately took his gun and shot Lao. I think that incident felt like a punch in the face, a kind of reminder that said "You are a murderer, you are in danger and put others in danger wherever you go". Maybe that made him think that his whole existence was synonymous of problems and he didn’t want to bring danger to Japan, he didn’t want to continue with that vicious circle. Remember when Ash said he always thought about the worst case scenario? Probably something terrible went through his mind at that moment. But hey, then you start thinking. Ok, I understand that he was stabbed and if he goes to the airport like that he would have worried Eiji and probably that would have result with Eiji rejecting going "back to his safe world", in Japan. And that’s something Ash didn’t want. But then why didn’t Ash go to a hospital? That’s what many people say. I think, in the whole anime Ash never paid attention to his own injuries, everytime he got hurt he continued doing stuff as if he was used to it. It was always Eiji or Blanca who took care of his injuries. Regardless of all the possibilities we can think to change that ending, Ash decided to return to the library to finish reading the letter. (Well, Yoshida did lol). Why doing that instead of anything else? Well, Eiji's letter had a lot of meaning for Ash. Eiji really saw him for who he really was and he accepted it with all its faces. Ash had never received unconditional love after his brother Griffin. Eiji saw the noble human being who lived inside of the boy that had no choice but kill to survive. Eiji saw the real Aslan Callenreese. So, was it very selfish that Ash chose to rest forever with that feeling of warmth that the letter gave him? Because he left this world with a smile, but ... what about Eiji?. I didn't like Lao, so I don't intend to justify his act, but if I think with a cold mind, he had his reasons for doing what he did. Ash never wanted Sing to tell Lao or the other chinese the real reason why he killed Shorter, he decided to be "the bad guy" to not involve others in the banana fish issue, because if they found out about it they were going to be in danger from knowing that information. Also, the fight that was going to happen between Sing and Ash made Lao attack Ash. Probably knew he would lose Sing in the battle. And that ended up provoking what he did. But it was an irony, because Ash keep the chinese away from the drug issue and hid the truth about Shorter but in the end, he was killed by one of those who he was protecting. The wound caused by the knife is something that Ash would usually have survived. And that's why his death weighs. Did he let himself die? Ash fought with everything to live, to be free and to end the drug that should never have existed, banana fish. When he was with Eiji and talked about the Kilimanjaro leopard he said that he sometimes thought that death maybe was the best thing for him but he never wanted to do it. He didn't hurt himself, the stabbing scene was made by Lao, and yet it kind of feel like Ash took advantage of it and let the death come slowly for him. Maybe Ash in his interior always saw death as a liberation, as he said in his thoughts when he was in the hospital after the fight with Arthur: " Am I dying? it feels so calm here, it’s like the pain never existed. Happiness, sadness...it's like death gently takes it all ". So, was death the only freedom for him? If he lived, would he have been able to keep dealing with all the blood he carried in his hands? he felt guilty about it, we saw during the anime how he was tormented by that. Regardless, as a follower of this story I would have really wanted him to have had a chance. I'm not gonna lie, maybe that will make me feel frustrated and sad every time I remember that ending. He deserved to be happy more than anything, he was a broken soul that didn't choose the life they gave him and yet he fought until the end. Anyway, I said it at the beginning and I say it again, the final scene is not as simple as it looks, it's deeper. Well, that if you really take the time to analyze the characters and situations. It's an ending that doesn't match the "they lived happy for ever", many people maybe expected it but this was banana fish... so we had a very "banana fish" ending. The funny thing is that I felt a combination of emotions when I saw that final scene. Disillusion and a incredible sadness, but somehow I also felt something different. Do you remember how Ash suffered while sleeping? then seeing him sleeping in the library with a smile on his face made me feel so strange, shattered but at the same time a bit of peace. It hurts so much and many fans aren't satisfied with that, others think it's an ending that fits with the story. There is a diversity of opinions regarding that ending and it's something that makes this story interesting to discuse. I am happy and sad to have watched this anime,I will remember it always. And I am thankfull to Eiji because he brought love and happiness to Ash. They are bonded by their souls,no matter how far away they are. "My soul is always with them". Thank you so much for react to banana fish, actually I was only into your banana fish videos. I will emigrate to your other anime reactions of this season. Sayonara banana fish reactions, Sayonara pain for re-watching this anime with you, But hey, I'm not gonna say sayonara to you,Teeaboo.
thank you♡ and yet I feel like I didn't say all what I wanted to say. There's a lot to say and discuss but the words don't come out that easy when the heart just want to cry hahaha ^^'
Thank you for sharing your in-depth analysis. So eloquent! I also liked your logic behind the factors that could have possibly culminated towards Ash's final decision. The unconventional ending definitely accentuated the pragmatic nature of Banana Fish because it's an anime where fate and destiny coexist with one another, and it's a constant struggle between them. In this case, fate managed to succeed in keeping Ash and Eiji apart due to Ash's flooded stigma - an object of people's obsession, hatred, and envy. As you said, this is another selfless act of Ash. The quote from Eiji's letter, "My soul is always with you", makes me think that fate may have succeeded in keeping Ash and Eiji apart in the physical world because of the fact they both came from completely different worlds and the repercussions of Ash's stigma; however, fate cannot separate one's soul from another. This is what made the ending so beautiful because Ash was given the greatest gift he could ever ask for - unconditional love and selflessness thanks to Eiji, and that was good enough for him. It's not always about 'saving' a life; it's most importantly about giving someone a good 'quality of life'. That's what makes life truly meaningful.
"Un.. was this Ash person (Eiji's) un.. well lover?" "He was more than that. Which doesn't mean their relationship was sexual because it wasn't, but they do love each other.. maybe the way lovers do."
The snows of kilimanjaro, the way that leopard dies is the same way as Ash, what i mean is, Ash died in a time when he couldn't choose between the two, getting help from others, or choosing a future with Eiji, just same as that leopard, who died in the middle.. And how nobody knows the reason...
I was at work on my break watching the final episode...😢 My boss almost let me go home cause he saw me crying. Lol i was too embaressed to say it was because of this show. Lol
It was so cruel how they made us believe we'd get an airport reunion scene, only for Ash to get stabbed. I think we all felt like we were being stabbed, in that moment. It's been years since I first read Banana Fish and I've watched/read it many times by now but Ash's death makes me cry every time. One of the most painful fictional character deaths of all time. At least there was the Sing and Yut Lung scene to cheer me up. I'm really happy with the ending Yut Lung got, even though many people think he didn't deserve it. He finally got the chance to have a friend :)
1:10:34 you were expecting Blanca, but it was me, Di(n)o! Ok but in all seriousness, I really enjoyed your reaction to this series. You really took your time to take this show in and discuss it in dept. Also the fact that after that ending you took 8 mins to gather your toughts only to return with a flask of (presumably) alcohol? What a mood, what an absolute mood. Thanks for these great reactions!
Yeah, I think we all needed that moment. I didn't skip ahead. Couldn't bring myself too, because I needed that time to process and mourn as much as he did.
Visioning banana fish for the second time with you, I noticed something : in the precedent episode, then in this one, we see Ash looking up above. In the 23th ep, in a plea to God, to take his life instead of Eiji's. Then, in the final, when wounded and gone back inside the library, this look up again. I cannot help but wonder if his decision to let himself die here wasn't like an acceptance of the "deal" he made. Eiji's been miraculously saved, God has done his part of the deal, and now, Ash has to fulfilled his'. When Ash tries to contact Eiji again, at the hospital, the timing of the policeman seems too bad to be a coincidence, as if settled by a master of cards : Ash and Eiji should not be together again, it isn't part of the deal (the picture of their hand reaching but never touching looks a lot like a certain religious painting by the way). And then, in the ending part, Ash let himself hope to go back with Eiji, but is stopped again, by Tao, with a timing that once again is too bad to be a coincidence. So I'm wondering, that look up, back at the library, could it be Ash saying "OK, I get the message, I'll complete my part of the deal, take me" ? I don't know. Anyway, as heartbreaking as this ending can be, I really think it's the only happy ending possible in this world. Eiji is alive, safe, and Ash dies knowing not only that, but also that he's been and will always be truly loved by his soulmate. It's absolutly beautiful, I'll probably cry over and over again thinking about this, re reading this, re watching this, but This. Is. Fucking. Beautiful.
I have so many thoughts and feelings about this ending, so I’m just going to put them below in sections: *On Fate:* As for the ending itself, I feel often times it’s viewed as Ash simply being swept away by fate, which is a valid interpretation, but I’d like to offer something a bit more on the positive side. To me, Ash defied fate, rather than succumbing to it because his fate, in my view, was never death. It *felt* like death to us as an audience because we have no control over it. It’s something we’ve considered as a possibility, and it’s constantly weighing on our minds as something that might be inevitable in the sense that we aren’t the author. However, in terms of the narrative itself, death was not the fate Ash wished to free himself from. What he wished to be free from was the life he was living before - a cold, ruthless killer, destined to remain forever alone in exchange for power he never wanted. I think this is the purpose of episodes 18 and 19. In episode 18, Blanca speaks about “playing the role you’re given.” Well, who’s giving out these roles? Fate. So Ash’s “fate,” the one he wishes to escape, is then depicted in episode 19, where we see Ash at his lowest. He completely breaks because this is the fate that continues to torment him, bending him to its will as if Ash is no more than an unfeeling puppet. "Fate" never wanted him to be free or find love or be cared about, and yet, he completely defies that. He defies fate. He fights for his freedom, and gains it. He finds love. He finds someone who cares about him. He defies everything fate had written for him, so if anything, I think this is a positive message: no matter what odds are stacked against you, you CAN defy that. You can defy fate. Adding to this, I’d like to point to Private Opinion. Blanca muses that, perhaps if Ash had been given “love rather than fear…” then stops himself, asserting that it’s irrelevant because Ash never has had a choice, and never will, but in the end, Ash does choose. He CHOOSES to love (“love and die rather than hate and rule”). I think this defiance of “fate” is also exemplified in many other ways throughout the story. We have Eiji talking about how he wanted to protect Ash from “fate,” which was carrying him further and further away. I view this in a couple ways. To me, this is Eiji saying that he wanted to save Ash’s soul. He wanted to save him from that dark, lonely path that fate had laid out before him, which, I’d say he does. Another way in which fate is defied. The second way this defies fate is, I think, connected to the OP. Whereas we see Eiji and Ash seemingly ripped apart by "fate" in the OP, they both turn into the same thing: snow, then join together to form the show's title, becoming one. In this sense they also defy fate because, although fate tries to rip them apart, in the end it cannot because their souls are forever together. *On the Leopard:* The leopard is an interesting element, which I think ties into what I’ve said above about fate, and how Ash views his own fate. He talks a lot about the leopard’s death, but what I think is important is *how* he talks about the leopard’s death - in other words, Ash talks about the circumstances surrounding the leopard’s death, not just the death itself. Why was the leopard that high? Did it get lost (in terms of Ash, I think the implied question is: “will I lose myself?”)? Or was it seeking something else (in Ash’s case, freedom)? Which way was it facing? Was it trying to climb higher or come back down (in Ash’s case: “will I have regrets?”)? The idea I’m getting at here is that, I feel Ash is looking at the leopard and wondering if its life had *meaning.* It’s not death Ash fears. It’s not death Ash wants to escape - it’s a meaningless life. Eiji replies that Ash is not a leopard. He knows how to climb higher and how to come back down. He can change his fate. I agree with Eiji, but the problem is, for Ash, his freedom is at the summit of this metaphorical mountain, and he has to climb it to reach that freedom… but he still makes that choice. He still chooses, and I’d say he reaches the mountain in an unconventional way (i.e. finding love along the way) and dies facing forwards, having found what he was seeking. Perhaps you could view this metaphor as having a sense that death is inevitable, but I still feel Ash defies his fate by choosing and by reaching the summit. “Fate” never wanted him to find his freedom at the top of the mountain. “Fate” wouldn’t have wanted him to climb the mountain at all, and if he so dared, “fate” would’ve wanted Ash to die climbing… but he doesn’t. *On the Library:* One element of the library that I think is very significant is exactly what you mentioned - it’s the place Ash goes to remove himself from all the pain and violence typically present within his world. It’s his peace. It’s his escape… and this is why I feel he chooses to die there. Another element I feel is important is what Eiji addresses when talking to Ibe. He speaks about how, when he first saw Ash in that library, he was “so alone… such indescribable and sublime loneliness.” The sort of beautiful irony (for lack of a better term) in this is that, now, when Ash is once again alone in the library, he’s not *actually* alone, because Eiji’s soul is, and always and forever will be, with him. *On the Airport:* I have a few different views and I switch between them frequently. On the one hand, I think maybe Ash truly believed that he could live a peaceful life in Japan with Eiji, and that spurred him on… However, on the other hand, I wonder if Ash was perhaps running to the airport to say one last goodbye. He’d already resigned himself to a life without Eiji, and it isn’t the plane tickets that make him start running. It’s Eiji’s letter, which makes me wonder if he perhaps just wanted “a chance for [them] to say goodbye.” As a side note: I know the ED is meant to be about Eiji being shot, but it’s possibly still relevant to the finale as well. *On Death:* Now, some people interpret Ash’s death as his choice, others see it as him not having a choice, but choosing the library. I personally feel that Ash did choose. In the manga, we have confirmation that Lao missed all of Ash’s vital organs, which inclines me to believe that he could have survived and sought help had he wanted to. This is why I think episode 14 is so important. We have a moment in the hospital where Ash says something along the lines of, “Still can’t die, huh?” In the manga, it was translated as, “Guess I missed out on dying again.” This is an instance wherein, we see that Ash does have at least *some* desire for death. So, why does he ultimately choose it? To me, I think Ash felt whole in that moment. He was complete. Eiji’s love filled him up, and I think he wanted to die on his own terms, peacefully, protecting Eiji while basked in the warmth of Eiji’s all-consuming love. *On Death Part 2:* I think Ash’s death comes with a beautiful message in that: some things in life (love, in this case) transcend death. When we love someone, we love them beyond the boundaries that death carries. We have our memories, we have our feelings… and these are things that death cannot take away from us. Eiji and Ash’s souls will always be together and always love each other, even in death, and I think that’s a lovely message. TH-cam hates me for this length and won't let me post the rest, so I'll comment the rest beneath this comment.
*On Love:* I really adore the way love is depicted in Banana Fish. When it comes to Ash and Eiji, it’s like the highest form of romantic love combined with the highest form of platonic love culminating in what I could only define as “soulmates.” It’s a true soul connection. It’s as if, at the very cores of their respective beings, their consciousnesses, who they are fundamentally as people… they just simply love each other. When I think of Ash and Eiji, I get this sense that our bodies are just casings for our consciousness, and loving somebody is something we do from the very depths of our soul, irregardless of that outer casing. I’d never really thought of it in that capacity, and I’ll always be thankful to Banana Fish for introducing me to that idea. *On Lao:* In regards to what you mentioned about Lao being the killer - I think this goes back partly to what Ash said an episode ago about how Lao must hate him because he sees him for the monster he truly is. This is one element of it that I find important. Another element that’s perhaps significant about it being Lao is that Lao is not like Dino or Arthur or Foxx. His motivations are different. He’s not “evil” in the way the other antagonists are. Rather, what he does to Ash is the result of a misunderstanding on Lao’s part. Ultimately, he stabs Ash to protect someone he loves - Sing. Doesn’t mean we have to hate him any less for taking Ash away, but I think these are some important point in regards to Lao. Anyways, thank you so much for everything, Teeaboo! I’m so happy to have found your channel through Banana Fish, and I look forward to seeing more of your content. Thank you for the journey! Also, here’s a happy headcanon to ease the pain: Ash and Eiji live together in Japan. It’s peaceful, quiet. They own a home in Izumo (Eiji’s hometown) - Japanese style. There’s a butsudan (mini shrine) with pictures of Griff, Skip, and Shorter. During holidays, they visit Max, Jess, and Michael. In the winter, the snuggle together underneath the kotatsu. In spring, they view the blooming cherry blossoms. In fall, they watch the leaves change hue. In summer, they slowly die because Japan is hot as fuuu- just kidding. In summer, they watch the fireworks from their rooftop and attend local festivals together. Each day is lived in the comfort and warmth of the other, and both couldn’t imagine a happier life. It’s “the happiest feeling in the world.” The end. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.
After Ash' s death, I was both despaired and reassured. It was a shock, but it also wasn't. I knew, somewhere, deep down, that Ash would never see Eiji again (at least not in the physical world of pain and struggle, but maybe in a far off place of peace and true happiness) or live a normal life. All signs pointed against Ash, no matter how hard he fought. I ignored that dreadful feeling, but was still slapped in the face when what I had feared actually occured. It was such a strange and touching scene. It was realistic, but it wasn't what I wanted. But maybe I like how it ended. It was fitting, but so terribly tragic. But for the first time, in that moment, in the end, I actually didn't try to deny the crushing truth. I knew the moment he was stabbed that that was how he would finally be defeated. Then he went to the library. I didn't expect that. I was surprised and glad that he could still make one last choice of his own. Ash now rests in peace and freedom, no longer a caged bird, set free by the pure love Eiji gave him and the moments they had together. He enjoyed the last months of his constantly brutal life because of Eiji. He could experience something meaningful. He felt complete and allowed himself to love and let go. This story broke me. But I still can't bring myself to hate it. I'll always remember Banana Fish.
Omg I can’t believe I cried AGAIN for banana fish . I thought I was over it but the pain is still there . I loved re watching the whole series as you were reacting, thank you for the company. ❤️
For the scenario it’s in, the calm piano at the end is actually very fitting. Ash didn’t die in the middle of an adreline pumping battle, he died peacefully and willingly in one of his favorite places, his best friends caring letter clutched in his hands. He’s taken much worse wounds, he could’ve gotten to a hospital. But he was okay with dying. He knew someone cared about him and that someone was safe. I don’t think many people notice it, but when the lady in the library comes and tells Ash he can’t sleep there, Ash smiles. It’s barely noticeable, but that’s why the lady says he must be having a good dream. He smiles because he’s content. Ash died with an emotion he hadn’t felt in a long time; happinesses.
Both the anime and the manga, gives us a very important lesson of life and death, no one is exempt from the tragedies and desafortunate events that happen to us in life, no matter how positive or negative your life is, it will always happen an event that marked us in life, and we must know how to overcome these adversities, who else would like (including me) that Ash and Eiji were together. But everything happens for a reason and in life you have to know how to get up, that is not only the lesson that the manga has, this is also a lesson for us as human beings 😉
I don't usually cry over shows, and Banana Fish was no exception, however, I don't think I have ever felt so empty and sad after watching a show, as I did after watching Banana Fish. Like, I stared at my wall for a good 40 minutes trying to process my emotions. I honestly still haven't fully recovered from the sadness that is Banana Fish. I still love the show, how it portrays the character's emotions and thoughts, how it has complex characters with flaws and talents, how it teaches that love isn't always about words or made obvious, but can still be shown in other ways, the soundtrack. It really is a great story.
Yes totally! Your reactions and analysis are the best, I really look forward to your interpretation of Mo Dao Zu Shi. It didn't get as much attention as it should've been since donghua (Chinese counterpart of anime) is not as globally widespread as anime yet.
Aaaah! I thought I was done with crying already..... but everytime I watch that last scene.... it is just too much and I end up crying... I just really loved BANANA FISH, it was an amazing anime. Teeaboo thank you so much for all your reactions! I really love your comments and thoughts!
I am crying not kidding . Eiji didnt say goodbye and the ending song always has the line " i wish i could say goodbye over and over again " my periods arent helping FUCK
When I saw Ash dead I just had to lock myself in my room and cried for quite a while, then a friend came in and asked me why I was crying, but as I told him he just said ,,why are you crying about something like that he isn't even real 😂?" I told him he is an asshole and that he has to show his feelings more often. Now I'm sitting in the corner and I'm trying to get myself together. ,He just wanted to protect Eiji!😭
I’ve basically become vegetative after this. I regret having watched any of this. I always get hurt after becoming emotionally invested in fiction, but this one just goes cuts so deep personally. If it hurts now, I wonder how much it will hurt when I never find my eiji. Sounds cringeworthy but it’s true
The whole story was so intense that I was quite involved in the whole thing.....🤯🤯 I felt every thing from happiness to sadness, anger, remorse everything...😵😵 I was quite disappointed when Ash was not able to reunite with Eiji although he promised to see him again.....😭😭😭😭 Yau si (the Chinese guy) also quite invoked sympathy because of his back story but he was so much jealous of Ash's happiness that he became his enemy although he could join hands and avenge his mother.☹️☹️☹️ This anime left me speechless.. 🤐🤐 Fantastic way of showing the harsh world, the importance of friends, hope !!🙂🙂 Cried a whole awful lot after the series ended.....😭😭😭😭🤧🤧🤧🤧🤧
Okay so I've watched this series of Teaboo's just now for the second time and I dont think I've made a comment on this series before but I honestly have to. This is the most beautiful show and reaction I have ever seen. I balled my eyes out all night last night and all day today simply because of how beautiful the ending was and how much it hurt. I know you probably wont see this comment teaboo but you should review yuri on ice next if you havent seen it! You probably have but maybe! Anywho thankyou so much for making such amazing videos and entertaining me to no extent!
It hurts looking at Yut-Lung cuse In Yasha Volume 49 Yut-lung and Sing are brought up and it reads that Yut-lung got murderd at age 30, and called Sing a friend. We didn’t even see Yut-Kung and Sing’s relationship 😭😭😭
Well sh*t. There are just no happy endings, are there? But when I think about it, I can almost understand what Banana Fish's creator was trying to convey through all the tragedies of this story. It shows us that reality is often cruel, and unless we want people to continue this cycle of suffering and abuse, we need to take action, defy fate, to do what we can to improve the world. Ash's side won through determination, courage, and strength. They rid the world of Banana Fish and exposed the pedophiles. But him and his friends alone weren't enough to completely avoid the crushing truths of reality. People were always going to want to make Ash pay for the countless things he did (even if it was for self-defense or revenge and in the effort of bettering the world). No matter how much good someone tries to accomplish, there will be something or someone in the way who thinks differently, but ultimately, still wants to better their lives in this messed up cycle where almost everyone is both the victim, and the assailant (like in the case of Yut Lung). So yeah, one of the many morals of the story could be that reality is quite unfair, but that we need to make the most of it to do what we can, and to give others a chance to live better lives and survive if you, yourself, cannot be spared (as was with the case of Ash saving Eiji through his death and cutting the ties so no one would pursue Eiji any longer). Sorry this was long, I got carried away. Hope you enjoyed. :,)
The ending reminds me of Ernest Hemingway’s A Farewell to Arms (where a solider falls in love with a nurse in the midst of WWI, get pregnant, and run away to Switzerland; only to give birth to a stillborn and the nurse dies of a hemorrhage, leaving the soldier all alone). If the mangaka was going for a depressing end that paid homage to that painful work of Hemingway, she did a scarily accurate job. Though I...strongly dislike that Ash and Eiji can’t be together in the end, because it ends this way, it’s nice to know this generation is experiencing classic tragic poetry in such a modern take.
Thank you for your reactions, Teeaboo! I'm very glad you liked Banana Fish, I hope more people will start watching it because of you! To complete the story, here you can find New York Sense: ash-callenreese.tumblr.com/scans/new-york-sense It's a canon book of pictures Eiji took in New York City; the first half has actual photos, the second half has Yoshida's official art, there are "new" pictures of Ash (of course "old" in canon because... you know why) and a few pictures of other characters taken about 4/5 years after Garden of Light. I'd love to know what you think! About the ending, there's something else I wanted to say. I expect many fans telling you that Ash "chose to die". That's the most common interpretation of the ending, but apparently only among Western fans. Personally, I'd suggest to read this thread because I like this interpretation (from a Japanese fan) better: www.reddit.com/r/BananaFish/comments/aij0vd/a_different_view_of_the_ending_long_post/ I'm not saying it's the only true way to see it, but I wish more Western fans would at least consider it as a possibility. I might add another comment if I decide to rewatch your video. Anyway, I also want to thank all the other fans here because I love reading your posts too! It was fun, the journey is over... but I won't say sayonara to you, because I'm sure we'll see each other again. :)
God, I’ve watched this ending multiple times, and I’ve read it many more times in the manga...but it never fails to destroy me. There are a couple more side stories - Fly Boy In the Sky, Ura Banana, Cape Cod Story (That Summer), and the “final” epilogue, New York Sense. Anyway, thank for your excellent, contemplative, and studious commentary, and for watching this. It’s been a pleasure.
Seeing Teeaboo's BF reaction episode 24, grabs tissue and popcorn: "Well I guess it's time to cry again" Thank you so much for this amazing ride, your review and comments are quite entertaining and insightful, it just adds more for my love of BF. Keep it up Teeaboo!
I can't really put into words why this show affected me so much more than any other. I watch a lot of anime, including some that are arguably better than BF, if I'm trying to be objective. Several lacked a happy ending. Many had complex characters, and so on. Heck, I wouldn't even give BF a 10/10 rating despite my love for it, but...in the end, *nothing* ever affected me as much emotionally as BF did. The first time I finished it, I cried for hours and was an emotional wreck for months if I so much as thought about it. It took me over a year to be ready to watch this reaction because I hadn't steeled myself enough yet to live through it again. Of course, watching it alongside you made me cry yet again. But I think thanks to your insightful, detailed analysis, I understand a bit better now why I felt so strongly for this show, compared to other ones. So thank you so much for your thoughtful, interesting reaction, and a very belated welcome to the lingering pain that is "having watched Banana Fish" ;)
TT_TT in all honesty I was rewatching Banana Fish with you and it took me three days to allow myself to watch the last episode because I knew it would hurt again. But I can't complain about the ending. No matter how much I wish they got to be happy together this ending was so in theme with the whole anime that I can just sit here and cry about it all.
That's the worst about it, that the ending fits so well that I don't *want* it to be different 😢 There are plenty of not-so-happy endings in media, and plenty of deaths I'm sad about, but usually I can flee to the world of fanworks to be in denial there~ But not with Banana Fish. I don't want a different ending. This one was perfect. But that sure doesn't make it easier to get over it...
Balancing between hope and despair... that's what Banana Fish did with us, giving us hope that maybe Ash could have been with Eiji at the airport... and then the only one who didnt see Ash as we saw him killed him. Those last five minutes i was doing my ugly crying and screaming to my mom that Ash died, even though she doesnt know a thing about Banana Fish. I'm sad your other reactions are not available. I enjoyed watching this with you.
Congrats on making it through, and thanks for the reactions. Some reactors have talked a lot over this ending; we could all see the thousand-mile stare when reality finally kicked in. I actually appreciated the fact that you took the time to really absorb what was happening. It strings you along just when you think that there's a chance of a good end to all the suffering. Nope. It makes it worse. This finale hurts, but it's still amazing that it went there. I'm not a crier, I never have been. This is the one series that really got to me. I haven't seen a reactor get to the end in a while.... I thought I would be okay since it had been a while but I guess I was wrong. I cried again.
but maybe it will hurt forever,even with memes hahaha. I watched maybe 4 reactors for this series and Teaaboo was the last one I was watching. The first 3 ended the anime in december so the pain was mutual for all of us. Then today,3 months after the final episode I thought I had overcomed the ending a little bit but I was wrong. I fucking cried again with teaaboo reaction hahahah
@@Kari_Bunny XD yeah same. I made my friend watch it blind a couple of weeks after it ended. I barely kept it together but I totally lost it this time... Again. It's the only show that's hit me this hard. I can only think of one other show that's made me cry and definitely not as frequently as Banana Fish
I've gotta say I relate to not identifying as a crier. I try my best not to get emotional or get too attatched to things. But this ending. Was fricking. Tragic. I loved Ash and every other character so much. I HAD to care. It hit me like a bus of shock, disappointment, anger, and despair that I just couldn't help but sob over the unfairness of it all. I tear up every time.
Rewatching all your commentary on this series, it's all absolutely amazing and you noticed so many things that I never noticed! I love your react videos because you don't just react, you discuss and analyze in such an engaging and fun way! Your videos are so relaxing and comforting as well, love the calm and good vibes
Thank you so much for sharing your reactions with us! Your commentary throughout was phenomenal. Banana Fish will always be a really special show to me in my heart. I mean, Ash and Eiji are just absolute soulmates. Watching this series with you was so fun from beginning to end, and I look forward to seeing more whether it's Mo Dao Zu Shi (which is incredible) or whatever else fans decide! I know I've commented this once before, but I figured I'd bring it up again just in case it got lost in a sea of other comments. I think a really good option for the polls would be No.6. A lot of Banana Fish fans came directly from that anime, including me. Both are plot heavy rather than just being a mlm romance between two characters. No.6 has many similarities to Banana Fish. For example: they both focus on government corruption and the state of the world they're living in, there's really good chemistry between both main characters (Nezumi and Shion), a lot of danger and turmoil in the process of getting to their end goal, both animes are very underrated lmao, etc. No.6 is an amazing story which I think you would most definitely enjoy, given how much you like this one. Anyway, thanks again for reacting to Banana Fish. It was a wild ride!
The thing that always gets me every single time I watch anything Banana Fish related is how Ash was never allowed to be concerned about himself or his own feelings. Guess that's why he was a leader, but it just hits me hard. He always had to think or take care of others and all he needed was someone like Eiji to come along sooner and change his path. Ugh, Blanca could have taken him away while he was still young. This boy was used for his body in multiple ways since he was young and all he needed was someone to protect him. I may have said this on here before or elsewhere, but that's how this freaking show affected me and it's hard to even watch the happy times without it feeling bittersweet.
I am so sorry if this comment is coming through a second time, I am unsure if it went through properly on my first attempt. Do you think it would be possible for you to upload your Banana Fish reactions to a file sharing site ? Many of them went down due to copyright strikes and I would love to watch them again
I'm sorry but I do not like Garden of Eden Eiji's design, I just feel like I'm looking at Blanca and it's really pulling me out of the story, I really wonder how Ash would feel about that, his boyfriend looking just like his mentor. But I do very much appreciate the confirmation in Garden of Eden that Eiji and Ash's relationship was never sexual, I feel like this adds another layer of purity to their relationship and it's such a huge testament of respect for Ash from Eiji. I know a conversation between them about this subject wasn't necessary because of how things were shown but it would have been such an eye-opening conversation for them to have. Even though Ash weaponizes sex he absolutely hates it because for him it's violence and dominance and trauma and I love that instead of Eiji trying to be like "hey its different when it's real love etc" instead he's like "we don't need that in our relationship, and we don't need it to show love to each other". And when you think about it Eiji and Ash are able to have this relationship and yet they hardly ever touch each other because Eiji is mindful and respectful of how Ash feels about physical contact---but we also get to see that when they do touch hands or hug it's very affectionate and very wholesome and that's what Ash really needed, he needed love that was wholesome and he needed affection that portrayed that wholesomeness and Eiji was able to do that. There's this scripture in the bible, it's 1 Corinthians 13:1 and it goes: Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. And Eiji and Ash's relationship is Every. Single. One of these traits.
I almost feel like Ash was able to accomplish more than that Leopard. He climbed to the top and was able to make it back down and in a way I almost feel like after reading that letter, after his soul confirmed he was loved, he almost seemed comfortable enough to die. And it’s almost as if he was able to climb to warmth to die as well. I feel like a heartless human for not crying at all.
The people in New York finally getting to see Ash as how Eiji's seen him all this time, not a ruthless killer but a human who just needed so much love. This finale makes me kinda sad cuz your reactions to Banana Fish was amazing, thank you very much that I get to relive the show again (even if it hurts) lol. ^^
This is the first time I've watched Banana fish. After three days, I'm still randomly bursting into tears over it. I have a lot of feelings about the ending. I'm sitting here, still crying, thinking about what could have happened. I really dislike Lao, but I understand that he wanted to protect his little brother. I hate the ending, but at the same time I think it's fitting. Ash deserved so much more than what he got and it breaks my heart because I really loved his character. It seems a bit silly but I really wanted a happy-go-lucky airport scene even though I already knew from spoilers that it would end this way, and it still caught me off guard. I didn't expect Lao to be the one who dealt the final blow, but I'm glad Ash got his closure with Dino. I just want to cry because of how much I loved Eiji and Ash. I heard of Banana fish as a BL recommendation, but honestly I loved them as both friends or a couple. They deserved the world and they didn't get it. There are a lot of things in angry/hurt about with the choices of them, like why Eiji decided to go back to Japan, or why Ash didn't get help and then see Eiji once he was healed, but it isn't for me to be upset over those choices. It was a very "Banana Fish" ending, which makes me sad, but it also was a filling ending. Banana Fish is such a good anime, and not every show can make you feel so many emotions at once. It was beautifully created, and I WILL be crying for the next 6 weeks :')
I'm right there with you. I'm new to this anime and finished it within 4 days just yesterday. I wish I could've made it last longer. Ash's death was also spoiled for me in a way. I completely freaked out for 2 minutes when I heard, but decided to deny it because who would kill the main character? But the uneasiness about Ash's fate built up as I watched the last 3 episodes. I was still shocked and broken by the death scene when it occured. I hadn't expected him to end in that way by the hands of someone he had protected from the knowledge of Banana Fish. Ash was my favorite character who went through beautiful character development, and who persisted in a world that was constantly against him. I can't help but feel his fate was extremely unfair. I only wish Ash hadn't been alone in those final hours. It didn't have to be Eiji, who would never be the same after that, but an acquaintance like Sing would've been a nice comfort. I also would've like a proper farewell between Ash and Eiji, like the text Ash sent Max, calling him "Dad." But no. Fate was not so kind. (At least they're together in spirit, never truly seperated.) Yet, I like how it ended. He was rarely able to make his own decisions throughout his life, pushed this way and that by sick and cruel people. He could choose where to die and how he would spend his last moments. He wanted to die with the proof of Eiji's love in his hands, and with that happiness in his heart. He might have been able to survive (I heard Lao missed all his vital organs, but don't quote me on that). But he didn't want to continue the cruel cycle of reality. He believed that he would die as payback for everything he had done and all the people he killed. He wasn't a villain in our eyes, acting in self-defense and revenge, but to Lao, he was. He would always be pursued by someone, no matter how long he lived. So he chose to die and love rather than hate and struggle to live. He was happy. He died knowing that he was saving Eiji by cutting their ties for good, sparing Eiji from those who sought revenge for Ash's many acts. He could die knowing he was loved, that he too could love someone else, and that his last months were worth living, having known Eiji and his unconditional love and friendship. He was to be free, no longer a caged bird, free from his life of struggle and abuse. I rarely cry. But goddamn. I felt like I was hit by a bus. This anime deserves all the tears and love in the world. It's safe to say that I was teary eyed all night and all throughout today. The tears have yet to stop and I apologise if I have prolonged your sadness. Yes, it's fitting. Yes, it's tragic. Never have I loved a story that hurt me so much.
@@citriz Couldn't have said it better myself. I was really sad about the ending and I feel like it was selfish of him to leave Eiji (just me being salty about him not going to a hospital) I think he truly deserved his chance to be selfish for once. He really deserved the world and his happy ending in Japan, but he decided he would be in control of his fate at that moment. The ending was a huge slap in the face for me, because it was spoiled for me too, but I was in denial because I don't usually see something with a not-so-happy ending. I love Ash so much, and I love Eiji too. This anime struck my heart without me realizing it and all of a sudden I was crying over a fictional story. They deserved the world, and the ending was bittersweet, but I really, REALLY enjoyed the show.
@@cydnim.8068 Agreed. So many characters went through crap. But at least Ash won, the pedophiles were exposed, Banana Fish was destroyed, Ash is free, and Eiji is safe. I actually cried a little in front of my younger sister 😂. I don't remember any story that made me feel so sad. I was a little embarrassed at the time. Like you said, it's fiction. But it's an extremely well done piece of art that was able to get me to care about almost every character, as well as worry for them. I know I couldn't have stopped the tears anyway. A good sob or two was much needed after the finale. And I'm glad I could mourn. I don't regret watching Banana Fish despite what it did to my heart. It was an amazing journey and I won't say "Sayonara" to this show any time soon.
Hey dude, today I sat here and binged all your BF reactions only to cry at episode 24 for the umpteenth time. A year later and I still have to live with the fact that my headcanon of Ash and Eiji being alive and living in Japan together is only that, a headcanon. Thanks again for putting so much love and effort into your reactions of this series, it's appreciated.
It’s weird to think what that librarian’s reaction will be when she realizes that was a dead guy and not a sleeping guy. I would probably take some time off work after that.
It’s been 3 months since this show ended, and I’m far from getting over it. I’m sad about so many things today. I’m sad because it’s been 3 months and I’m still in denial. I’m sad because they’re not real but my pain is. (I actually cried a whole lot again watching this reaction video, and I screamed “why!?” At the top of my lungs again watching Lao stabbing Ash.) I’m sad because I’m a sucker for happy endings and I didn’t get one. (I really think Ash deserved a happy life with Eiji, damn it) I’m sad because I remembered Garden of Light exists. (But until is not animated for me it doesn’t, actually in Banana Fish’s official page Ash is not marked as dead) I’m sad because I loved to watch this series with you and now it’s over. (But I’ll still wait for Rambo Ash) But despite all, I’m really thankful for this journey, it was really amazing, thanks for reacting to Banana Fish, now my favorite show of all times. I’ll definitely stick with you in the future ❤️
"I'm sad because they're not real but my pain is." Ohh I never thought of it that way. Growing up, my mom would always scold me for getting emotional about fictional things, saying it's silly because it's not real, and I guess I ended up believing that. But even if the characters aren't, our emotions for them are. I really like that sentence :)
Ishizuka unsyou It was said that all voices were recorded before other voice actors considering physical condition He is the one who played the voice of Joseph JoeStar(Jojo part3 & part4)
Damn, man, what a journey you've made with this series! It's so unusual to see a person reacting commit so much, taking notes and going back to rewatch some parts for quotes or shots frame by frame, I loved your commentary on the plot, the animation and the reaction overall, particularly here in the last episode: not rushing, processing what happened and how it made you feel and why....very powerful
I really appreciate all of your banana fish videos, they are so well thought out with the analysis and I love your interpretation of everything. It’s almost enough to make up for you pronouncing GIF like ‘jiff’ (joke)
Thank you for the great reaction😭this is really late but I just binge watched ur banana fish reaction in one day and still waterfalled for the fifth time watching this show.
Teaboo thank you for uploading all the full episodes and extra parts in the manga 👊 🙇😘 Are you going to keep this posted? Or take it down after a while? I want to know, as my friends are going to have another anime benge night and I really want to watch this with em. I know they'll be just as emotionally effected or even more 😅
Hello. I wanted to say thank you for giving people the opportunity to experience such a unique and beautiful series like Banana Fish. I've already seen the series one time and read the manga as well, so thank you (again) for allowing me to re-experience Banana Fish through your own creative insight and interpretations!
ahhh, whyyyyyy I usuallycomplain about endings always being the same but now I wish this was just another happily ever after, I cant say was crying cause the ending was some wha spoild when I was on tiktik while watching the series.
Loved your reactions to this series, very in depth analysis. The ending hurts every time... my personal thoughts on it are that it’s not a case of Ash being a victim of his ‘fate’ ie: his life of violence was ‘bound’ to catch up to him if he followed Eiji. In my interpretation, it’s his lack of belief in himself that he is capable of living a peaceful life with Eiji, being unable to let go of the ‘Lynx’ and choose to fully become Aslan, that leads to his death. In the scene with Blanca this is the first time where you can argue that Ash has a free choice of how to shape his life. Before then his life path was shaped by the evil all around him and he was just surviving. Now with his enemies dead, we clearly see him choosing to remain with his gang and do what he is used to doing- living a life of violence. At that point he is resolved to be Ash Lynx forever and therefore give up Eiji, because he knows rationally that Eiji’s peaceful world and the world of Ash Lynx cannot coexist without Eiji being hurt. Consider however if he’d had the self belief and resolve to completely disappear- to become anonymous and then find Eiji later on, chose a peaceful life- the boy is smart enough to do it... so why doesn’t he? I think it’s a lack of belief that he is good enough and deserves love and a peaceful life, because a huge part of his core identity is sadly that of the ‘Lynx’, ‘tiger’ ‘demon’ etc that people have always seen him as. It’s when he loses focus and selfishly tries to make the Ash Lynx and Aslan Callenreese identities coexist out of emotional desperation (when he reads Eijis letter and tries to go after him, despite knowing that he’s still deep in the gang world) that he is punished for that selfishness. He’s reminded once again that those worlds can’t exist together. We see when he chooses to die (and earlier in the ‘suicide’ scene with Yut Lung, and the ‘god, take me instead’ scene) that he loves Eiji more than he is capable of loving himself... for me, Ash’s story is a lesson about the importance of knowing who you are and caring for yourself and the people around you, whatever life throws at you.
I'm happy to have found your channel, I've watched your BF in a few days. And I want to thank you for reacting to the series with an open mind, I enjoyed also the time you took to discuss each one of the episodes, I think that is what makes your channel different from others. The ending is bittersweet, I still can not understand why the author decided such an end for a person who suffered as much as ash. Anyway, It's been a pleasure to have watched BF again with you. Definitely, you are one of the best reaction channels and I also wanna thank you for recommending Monster, I decided to give it a try and I'm loving it. I subscribe to your channel and I am also gonna check out Mo Dao Zu Shi, I'm looking forward to what comes next. (sorry if there are grammatical errors, English is not my main language)
I wish there was an another episode where Eiji founds out he dies, and returns to New York and sits down at the funereal site where Ash would be buried. Eiji would talk to him and the clip would fast forward over the years of Eiji talking to him, till he is very old and soon passes away. Once Eiji dies he reunites with Ash in his spirit form. They then walk together hand n’ hand away from the camera view until we can’t see them anymore.
I'm really happy you gave this a long reaction and didn't cut out a majority of your thoughts and silences. It really gives it the appropriate time and energy needed to process all the feelings. :)
A small video of Ash seducing his enemies to escape cought my attention and I immediately searched for Banana Fish. I fell in love with the anime immediately, but when I started watching the memes and vines, I saw how devastated almost everyone was about this episode and I just stopped watching... I didn't want something I just recently found and loved to end in such a bittersweet way, so I put it off for weeks. I came back to it today because I hate leaving things unfinished, so I just sat down and watched. I cried at the end, of course, but it was worth it to finally see how one of my new favourite animes end. I wish we could know what happened to Ash, Eiji, Sing and the other gang members... I love how well the characters grow and change throughout the show, and the moment things started to happen I knew atleast one of my favourites would die... And two did, maybe three... Skipper, Shorter, and possibly Ash.... The reason I say "possibly Ash" is because on the wiki for Banana Fish, everyone who died during the show had a grayed image. But Ash didn't. His was still colourful, which I hope means he didn't just give up his life in the library and leave Eiji, Sing, Blanca and Cain to discover his death.
It hurts.. so sad.. but im sure hes alive.. hes always got shot and stabbed but still alive right..? It won't be that hard for him to survive this time around.. hehe part 2.. part 2.. i hope the production will make for another part.. hehe 😊😊☺☺ hes alive for sure..
Omg this ending is so bittersweet, none the less beautiful I really enjoyed your reviews for banana fish. You should definitely react to mo dao zu shi, it is a beautiful story along with great animation and great characters!thanks again for your amazing reviews.
"Ooooh god da-OH That's a face" 32:18 I'm cackling omg great reaction!!! I've spent the past days binge-watching your videos and they're all wonderful!
I am happy I watched your reaction, I was really waiting for this episode of yours, I watched the end and read the epilogue so many times, I can't count I just can't stop crying every time I'm still in denial, the author said Ash died because he needed to be atone for his sins, but....Sing ... for me Ash is still alive, I want happily ever after and I understand Eiji's feelings ... why did he not come to the library? ... anyway I loved the series and I still waiting another epilogue....where Ash is alive yes denial :(
When you... get.. into a series and just come to relate and rely on the hope everything that just.... something to.. hold onto you really come to forget about reality.. and when it’s over it just ends.. when that character dies it’s as if you die with them... a true ending
I started tearing up when you were looking forward to the airport run spilling but I knew beforehand what was going to happen bus I've watched and read the ending sooo many times and I still tear up over it even tho it was now confirmed by MAPPA that Ash survived and opened a cafe with Eiji in Japan and they are living together happily
August would have been Ash's birthday wish she had chosen pictures of birthdays.christmas..whatever just to show nice moments,events Ash had but she shows him getting dressed..considering his story feels off to me another thing thats off is she is 14,sing in his 20's and marries her when she turns 18 and she becomes china town mafia boss wife! hardly what ash wanted,how does Ibe feel about that? he keeps taking/sending people to NY when they are having problems they then get involved with the mafia! difficult seeing Eiji run after that guy hoping its Ash Cape Cod is where Ash was born,they went theere to try aand get info through Griffs letters makes no sense Sing would have Ash letter in GOL it comes accross that sing has feelings for Eiji! Eiji feeling guilty about the letter I hate Yut talking on the phone so casualy about ash after everything thats happened
Lao hate hate hate Lao but I also hate that the audience has some sympathy with him as he thought he was saving sing he was folllowing sing around and seemed surprised hed gone to see ash but he saw they were fine with each other,so many things happen in life because people miss understand whats going on I hated Ash being upset and saying that Lao sees the real monster in him,Lao and the others always call him that when they are in the wrong,like Dino and others calling hima whore when they rape him I think he only refused to kill eiji because he knows sing would have nothing to do with him otherwwise he would have said no early,that and he knows ash would kill him but he kept quiet,knew they were going to try and kill them I think shorter was just an excuse for his claims of hate earlier he seemed obsessed with Sing being the boss of a larger area saying not even shorter managed that.. he hates the idea of working with anyone outside of the chinese he probably hated shorter been friends with ash its confusing that Lao stabs Ash then seems angry Ash let him!
I can’t accept this ending... I just can’t! But your reaction videos for the whole series is so inspiring and well thought out that I now have to watch some of your other videos! I appreciate the content and insight you give on the anime even if I want to cry forever now!!
Ash was born with the sunrise, and gone with the sunset.
Fuck that shit hurted
Damn I’m crying again, thanks
*CAN U NOT!!?!!* 😭💔
l'm so sorry fam, l just wanted to share my discovery and pain 😔😔
That is so beautiful and painful at the same time.
The greatest anime i've watch everrr... Thankss
I currently hate u u made me re-watch it and now I'm crying more then last time
I love u again nvm
HOW DID U NOT CRY????
Idk fam magic or something
I'm sure he went sobbing in those 8 minutes, don't worry we all did
Ash chose to die... Slowly and painfully. Just sat there and bled out for hours.
Yeah but not painfully he was happy
More like peacefully. Having lost that much blood , he was probably numb at the end , drowsy and just wanting to sleep but with the warmth of Eiji's words from the letter and the calmness of finally escaping his nightmarish life.
No no no he was just sleeping... i canttt 😭
@@fictionlover2064 This makes me feel both better & worse. But no matter how he passed, at least he's finally free :,).
Ash’s alive...his death is unknown in the anime the creator wanted to keep him alive so she left his picture in color unlike the dead ones but he’s dead in the manga
Many people don't understand why Ash survived a lot of gunshots and fights but not being stabbed. Many people see that as something pointless. But I think it's much more complex than how simple it looked. I think Ash for a moment thought that he really had the right to be happy, to give up that life of killing to survive and take that flight to Japan. He ran to the airport, but in his low guard and filled in emotions, is interrupted by Lao and as usual, he immediately took his gun and shot Lao. I think that incident felt like a punch in the face, a kind of reminder that said "You are a murderer, you are in danger and put others in danger wherever you go". Maybe that made him think that his whole existence was synonymous of problems and he didn’t want to bring danger to Japan, he didn’t want to continue with that vicious circle. Remember when Ash said he always thought about the worst case scenario? Probably something terrible went through his mind at that moment.
But hey, then you start thinking. Ok, I understand that he was stabbed and if he goes to the airport like that he would have worried Eiji and probably that would have result with Eiji rejecting going "back to his safe world", in Japan. And that’s something Ash didn’t want. But then why didn’t Ash go to a hospital? That’s what many people say. I think, in the whole anime Ash never paid attention to his own injuries, everytime he got hurt he continued doing stuff as if he was used to it. It was always Eiji or Blanca who took care of his injuries. Regardless of all the possibilities we can think to change that ending, Ash decided to return to the library to finish reading the letter. (Well, Yoshida did lol).
Why doing that instead of anything else? Well, Eiji's letter had a lot of meaning for Ash. Eiji really saw him for who he really was and he accepted it with all its faces. Ash had never received unconditional love after his brother Griffin. Eiji saw the noble human being who lived inside of the boy that had no choice but kill to survive. Eiji saw the real Aslan Callenreese. So, was it very selfish that Ash chose to rest forever with that feeling of warmth that the letter gave him? Because he left this world with a smile, but ... what about Eiji?.
I didn't like Lao, so I don't intend to justify his act, but if I think with a cold mind, he had his reasons for doing what he did. Ash never wanted Sing to tell Lao or the other chinese the real reason why he killed Shorter, he decided to be "the bad guy" to not involve others in the banana fish issue, because if they found out about it they were going to be in danger from knowing that information. Also, the fight that was going to happen between Sing and Ash made Lao attack Ash. Probably knew he would lose Sing in the battle. And that ended up provoking what he did. But it was an irony, because Ash keep the chinese away from the drug issue and hid the truth about Shorter but in the end, he was killed by one of those who he was protecting.
The wound caused by the knife is something that Ash would usually have survived. And that's why his death weighs. Did he let himself die? Ash fought with everything to live, to be free and to end the drug that should never have existed, banana fish. When he was with Eiji and talked about the Kilimanjaro leopard he said that he sometimes thought that death maybe was the best thing for him but he never wanted to do it. He didn't hurt himself, the stabbing scene was made by Lao, and yet it kind of feel like Ash took advantage of it and let the death come slowly for him. Maybe Ash in his interior always saw death as a liberation, as he said in his thoughts when he was in the hospital after the fight with Arthur: " Am I dying? it feels so calm here, it’s like the pain never existed. Happiness, sadness...it's like death gently takes it all ".
So, was death the only freedom for him? If he lived, would he have been able to keep dealing with all the blood he carried in his hands? he felt guilty about it, we saw during the anime how he was tormented by that.
Regardless, as a follower of this story I would have really wanted him to have had a chance. I'm not gonna lie, maybe that will make me feel frustrated and sad every time I remember that ending. He deserved to be happy more than anything, he was a broken soul that didn't choose the life they gave him and yet he fought until the end.
Anyway, I said it at the beginning and I say it again, the final scene is not as simple as it looks, it's deeper. Well, that if you really take the time to analyze the characters and situations. It's an ending that doesn't match the "they lived happy for ever", many people maybe expected it but this was banana fish... so we had a very "banana fish" ending. The funny thing is that I felt a combination of emotions when I saw that final scene. Disillusion and a incredible sadness, but somehow I also felt something different. Do you remember how Ash suffered while sleeping? then seeing him sleeping in the library with a smile on his face made me feel so strange, shattered but at the same time a bit of peace. It hurts so much and many fans aren't satisfied with that, others think it's an ending that fits with the story. There is a diversity of opinions regarding that ending and it's something that makes this story interesting to discuse.
I am happy and sad to have watched this anime,I will remember it always. And I am thankfull to Eiji because he brought love and happiness to Ash. They are bonded by their souls,no matter how far away they are. "My soul is always with them".
Thank you so much for react to banana fish, actually I was only into your banana fish videos. I will emigrate to your other anime reactions of this season.
Sayonara banana fish reactions,
Sayonara pain for re-watching this anime with you,
But hey, I'm not gonna say sayonara to you,Teeaboo.
Karu Bunny 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 couldn’t have said it better
What an amazing comment. Thank you.
thank you♡ and yet I feel like I didn't say all what I wanted to say. There's a lot to say and discuss but the words don't come out that easy when the heart just want to cry hahaha ^^'
welp that made me cry again :'(
Thank you for sharing your in-depth analysis. So eloquent! I also liked your logic behind the factors that could have possibly culminated towards Ash's final decision. The unconventional ending definitely accentuated the pragmatic nature of Banana Fish because it's an anime where fate and destiny coexist with one another, and it's a constant struggle between them. In this case, fate managed to succeed in keeping Ash and Eiji apart due to Ash's flooded stigma - an object of people's obsession, hatred, and envy. As you said, this is another selfless act of Ash. The quote from Eiji's letter, "My soul is always with you", makes me think that fate may have succeeded in keeping Ash and Eiji apart in the physical world because of the fact they both came from completely different worlds and the repercussions of Ash's stigma; however, fate cannot separate one's soul from another. This is what made the ending so beautiful because Ash was given the greatest gift he could ever ask for - unconditional love and selflessness thanks to Eiji, and that was good enough for him. It's not always about 'saving' a life; it's most importantly about giving someone a good 'quality of life'. That's what makes life truly meaningful.
I've watched the ending about 4 times now, but I still cry every time 😂😭😭😭
Mitra 101 I really believed I wouldn’t cry this time
I’m glad I’m not the only one :( I still can’t believe he’s gone 💔
i watch it over and over again and hope that it would end differently but it never does
aestaeticgguk MOOD 😭😭😭😭😭
I’m cold and sadistic. Inflict this pain on myself, rinse, and repeat. All in hopes of feeling something but a flick to my nose every time.
"Un.. was this Ash person (Eiji's) un.. well lover?" "He was more than that. Which doesn't mean their relationship was sexual because it wasn't, but they do love each other.. maybe the way lovers do."
This very long 💀
@@keilamarlene537 ?
@@keilamarlene537 its from the manga
They have a beautiful asexual relationship!!
The snows of kilimanjaro, the way that leopard dies is the same way as Ash, what i mean is, Ash died in a time when he couldn't choose between the two, getting help from others, or choosing a future with Eiji, just same as that leopard, who died in the middle.. And how nobody knows the reason...
NOOOO, DONT USE INTERNET AND ENGLISH TO HURT PPL 😭😭😭 IM CRYING
I was at work on my break watching the final episode...😢
My boss almost let me go home cause he saw me crying. Lol i was too embaressed to say it was because of this show. Lol
Missed opportunity to convert your boss 😉
It's been 3 months and I'm still in denial. Anyway, I feel ya.
Thank you for your amazing reactions throughout this series !
Teaboo: we are not getting a rom com run are we?
2 seconds later
TAKE THE PLANE
It was so cruel how they made us believe we'd get an airport reunion scene, only for Ash to get stabbed. I think we all felt like we were being stabbed, in that moment.
It's been years since I first read Banana Fish and I've watched/read it many times by now but Ash's death makes me cry every time. One of the most painful fictional character deaths of all time.
At least there was the Sing and Yut Lung scene to cheer me up. I'm really happy with the ending Yut Lung got, even though many people think he didn't deserve it. He finally got the chance to have a friend :)
I thought I was prepared to be re-ouched. I was not.
1:10:34 you were expecting Blanca, but it was me, Di(n)o!
Ok but in all seriousness, I really enjoyed your reaction to this series. You really took your time to take this show in and discuss it in dept. Also the fact that after that ending you took 8 mins to gather your toughts only to return with a flask of (presumably) alcohol? What a mood, what an absolute mood.
Thanks for these great reactions!
i love how most of the commentary part is just him. sitting silently. trying to process what happened and his sadness at the same time.
Yeah, I think we all needed that moment. I didn't skip ahead. Couldn't bring myself too, because I needed that time to process and mourn as much as he did.
Visioning banana fish for the second time with you, I noticed something : in the precedent episode, then in this one, we see Ash looking up above. In the 23th ep, in a plea to God, to take his life instead of Eiji's. Then, in the final, when wounded and gone back inside the library, this look up again. I cannot help but wonder if his decision to let himself die here wasn't like an acceptance of the "deal" he made. Eiji's been miraculously saved, God has done his part of the deal, and now, Ash has to fulfilled his'. When Ash tries to contact Eiji again, at the hospital, the timing of the policeman seems too bad to be a coincidence, as if settled by a master of cards : Ash and Eiji should not be together again, it isn't part of the deal (the picture of their hand reaching but never touching looks a lot like a certain religious painting by the way). And then, in the ending part, Ash let himself hope to go back with Eiji, but is stopped again, by Tao, with a timing that once again is too bad to be a coincidence. So I'm wondering, that look up, back at the library, could it be Ash saying "OK, I get the message, I'll complete my part of the deal, take me" ? I don't know. Anyway, as heartbreaking as this ending can be, I really think it's the only happy ending possible in this world. Eiji is alive, safe, and Ash dies knowing not only that, but also that he's been and will always be truly loved by his soulmate. It's absolutly beautiful, I'll probably cry over and over again thinking about this, re reading this, re watching this, but This. Is. Fucking. Beautiful.
Thank you for the journey.
I would like your comment but it's on 69 right now...
@@Trashbox3168 lmao
I have so many thoughts and feelings about this ending, so I’m just going to put them below in sections:
*On Fate:*
As for the ending itself, I feel often times it’s viewed as Ash simply being swept away by fate, which is a valid interpretation, but I’d like to offer something a bit more on the positive side. To me, Ash defied fate, rather than succumbing to it because his fate, in my view, was never death. It *felt* like death to us as an audience because we have no control over it. It’s something we’ve considered as a possibility, and it’s constantly weighing on our minds as something that might be inevitable in the sense that we aren’t the author.
However, in terms of the narrative itself, death was not the fate Ash wished to free himself from. What he wished to be free from was the life he was living before - a cold, ruthless killer, destined to remain forever alone in exchange for power he never wanted. I think this is the purpose of episodes 18 and 19. In episode 18, Blanca speaks about “playing the role you’re given.” Well, who’s giving out these roles? Fate. So Ash’s “fate,” the one he wishes to escape, is then depicted in episode 19, where we see Ash at his lowest. He completely breaks because this is the fate that continues to torment him, bending him to its will as if Ash is no more than an unfeeling puppet. "Fate" never wanted him to be free or find love or be cared about, and yet, he completely defies that. He defies fate. He fights for his freedom, and gains it. He finds love. He finds someone who cares about him. He defies everything fate had written for him, so if anything, I think this is a positive message: no matter what odds are stacked against you, you CAN defy that. You can defy fate.
Adding to this, I’d like to point to Private Opinion. Blanca muses that, perhaps if Ash had been given “love rather than fear…” then stops himself, asserting that it’s irrelevant because Ash never has had a choice, and never will, but in the end, Ash does choose. He CHOOSES to love (“love and die rather than hate and rule”).
I think this defiance of “fate” is also exemplified in many other ways throughout the story. We have Eiji talking about how he wanted to protect Ash from “fate,” which was carrying him further and further away. I view this in a couple ways. To me, this is Eiji saying that he wanted to save Ash’s soul. He wanted to save him from that dark, lonely path that fate had laid out before him, which, I’d say he does. Another way in which fate is defied. The second way this defies fate is, I think, connected to the OP. Whereas we see Eiji and Ash seemingly ripped apart by "fate" in the OP, they both turn into the same thing: snow, then join together to form the show's title, becoming one. In this sense they also defy fate because, although fate tries to rip them apart, in the end it cannot because their souls are forever together.
*On the Leopard:*
The leopard is an interesting element, which I think ties into what I’ve said above about fate, and how Ash views his own fate. He talks a lot about the leopard’s death, but what I think is important is *how* he talks about the leopard’s death - in other words, Ash talks about the circumstances surrounding the leopard’s death, not just the death itself. Why was the leopard that high? Did it get lost (in terms of Ash, I think the implied question is: “will I lose myself?”)? Or was it seeking something else (in Ash’s case, freedom)? Which way was it facing? Was it trying to climb higher or come back down (in Ash’s case: “will I have regrets?”)? The idea I’m getting at here is that, I feel Ash is looking at the leopard and wondering if its life had *meaning.* It’s not death Ash fears. It’s not death Ash wants to escape - it’s a meaningless life.
Eiji replies that Ash is not a leopard. He knows how to climb higher and how to come back down. He can change his fate. I agree with Eiji, but the problem is, for Ash, his freedom is at the summit of this metaphorical mountain, and he has to climb it to reach that freedom… but he still makes that choice. He still chooses, and I’d say he reaches the mountain in an unconventional way (i.e. finding love along the way) and dies facing forwards, having found what he was seeking.
Perhaps you could view this metaphor as having a sense that death is inevitable, but I still feel Ash defies his fate by choosing and by reaching the summit. “Fate” never wanted him to find his freedom at the top of the mountain. “Fate” wouldn’t have wanted him to climb the mountain at all, and if he so dared, “fate” would’ve wanted Ash to die climbing… but he doesn’t.
*On the Library:*
One element of the library that I think is very significant is exactly what you mentioned - it’s the place Ash goes to remove himself from all the pain and violence typically present within his world. It’s his peace. It’s his escape… and this is why I feel he chooses to die there.
Another element I feel is important is what Eiji addresses when talking to Ibe. He speaks about how, when he first saw Ash in that library, he was “so alone… such indescribable and sublime loneliness.” The sort of beautiful irony (for lack of a better term) in this is that, now, when Ash is once again alone in the library, he’s not *actually* alone, because Eiji’s soul is, and always and forever will be, with him.
*On the Airport:*
I have a few different views and I switch between them frequently. On the one hand, I think maybe Ash truly believed that he could live a peaceful life in Japan with Eiji, and that spurred him on… However, on the other hand, I wonder if Ash was perhaps running to the airport to say one last goodbye. He’d already resigned himself to a life without Eiji, and it isn’t the plane tickets that make him start running. It’s Eiji’s letter, which makes me wonder if he perhaps just wanted “a chance for [them] to say goodbye.”
As a side note: I know the ED is meant to be about Eiji being shot, but it’s possibly still relevant to the finale as well.
*On Death:*
Now, some people interpret Ash’s death as his choice, others see it as him not having a choice, but choosing the library. I personally feel that Ash did choose. In the manga, we have confirmation that Lao missed all of Ash’s vital organs, which inclines me to believe that he could have survived and sought help had he wanted to. This is why I think episode 14 is so important. We have a moment in the hospital where Ash says something along the lines of, “Still can’t die, huh?” In the manga, it was translated as, “Guess I missed out on dying again.” This is an instance wherein, we see that Ash does have at least *some* desire for death.
So, why does he ultimately choose it? To me, I think Ash felt whole in that moment. He was complete. Eiji’s love filled him up, and I think he wanted to die on his own terms, peacefully, protecting Eiji while basked in the warmth of Eiji’s all-consuming love.
*On Death Part 2:*
I think Ash’s death comes with a beautiful message in that: some things in life (love, in this case) transcend death. When we love someone, we love them beyond the boundaries that death carries. We have our memories, we have our feelings… and these are things that death cannot take away from us. Eiji and Ash’s souls will always be together and always love each other, even in death, and I think that’s a lovely message.
TH-cam hates me for this length and won't let me post the rest, so I'll comment the rest beneath this comment.
*On Love:*
I really adore the way love is depicted in Banana Fish. When it comes to Ash and Eiji, it’s like the highest form of romantic love combined with the highest form of platonic love culminating in what I could only define as “soulmates.” It’s a true soul connection. It’s as if, at the very cores of their respective beings, their consciousnesses, who they are fundamentally as people… they just simply love each other. When I think of Ash and Eiji, I get this sense that our bodies are just casings for our consciousness, and loving somebody is something we do from the very depths of our soul, irregardless of that outer casing. I’d never really thought of it in that capacity, and I’ll always be thankful to Banana Fish for introducing me to that idea.
*On Lao:*
In regards to what you mentioned about Lao being the killer - I think this goes back partly to what Ash said an episode ago about how Lao must hate him because he sees him for the monster he truly is. This is one element of it that I find important. Another element that’s perhaps significant about it being Lao is that Lao is not like Dino or Arthur or Foxx. His motivations are different. He’s not “evil” in the way the other antagonists are. Rather, what he does to Ash is the result of a misunderstanding on Lao’s part. Ultimately, he stabs Ash to protect someone he loves - Sing. Doesn’t mean we have to hate him any less for taking Ash away, but I think these are some important point in regards to Lao.
Anyways, thank you so much for everything, Teeaboo! I’m so happy to have found your channel through Banana Fish, and I look forward to seeing more of your content. Thank you for the journey!
Also, here’s a happy headcanon to ease the pain: Ash and Eiji live together in Japan. It’s peaceful, quiet. They own a home in Izumo (Eiji’s hometown) - Japanese style. There’s a butsudan (mini shrine) with pictures of Griff, Skip, and Shorter. During holidays, they visit Max, Jess, and Michael. In the winter, the snuggle together underneath the kotatsu. In spring, they view the blooming cherry blossoms. In fall, they watch the leaves change hue. In summer, they slowly die because Japan is hot as fuuu- just kidding. In summer, they watch the fireworks from their rooftop and attend local festivals together. Each day is lived in the comfort and warmth of the other, and both couldn’t imagine a happier life. It’s “the happiest feeling in the world.” The end. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.
After Ash' s death, I was both despaired and reassured. It was a shock, but it also wasn't. I knew, somewhere, deep down, that Ash would never see Eiji again (at least not in the physical world of pain and struggle, but maybe in a far off place of peace and true happiness) or live a normal life. All signs pointed against Ash, no matter how hard he fought. I ignored that dreadful feeling, but was still slapped in the face when what I had feared actually occured.
It was such a strange and touching scene. It was realistic, but it wasn't what I wanted. But maybe I like how it ended. It was fitting, but so terribly tragic. But for the first time, in that moment, in the end, I actually didn't try to deny the crushing truth. I knew the moment he was stabbed that that was how he would finally be defeated. Then he went to the library. I didn't expect that. I was surprised and glad that he could still make one last choice of his own.
Ash now rests in peace and freedom, no longer a caged bird, set free by the pure love Eiji gave him and the moments they had together. He enjoyed the last months of his constantly brutal life because of Eiji. He could experience something meaningful. He felt complete and allowed himself to love and let go.
This story broke me. But I still can't bring myself to hate it. I'll always remember Banana Fish.
Omg I can’t believe I cried AGAIN for banana fish . I thought I was over it but the pain is still there .
I loved re watching the whole series as you were reacting, thank you for the company. ❤️
For the scenario it’s in, the calm piano at the end is actually very fitting. Ash didn’t die in the middle of an adreline pumping battle, he died peacefully and willingly in one of his favorite places, his best friends caring letter clutched in his hands. He’s taken much worse wounds, he could’ve gotten to a hospital. But he was okay with dying. He knew someone cared about him and that someone was safe.
I don’t think many people notice it, but when the lady in the library comes and tells Ash he can’t sleep there, Ash smiles. It’s barely noticeable, but that’s why the lady says he must be having a good dream. He smiles because he’s content.
Ash died with an emotion he hadn’t felt in a long time; happinesses.
One of the few moments that he could find true happiness was also his last. The irony hurts my heart.
Thank you for taking this journey with us. It's been a pleasure.
Both the anime and the manga, gives us a very important lesson of life and death, no one is exempt from the tragedies and desafortunate events that happen to us in life, no matter how positive or negative your life is, it will always happen an event that marked us in life, and we must know how to overcome these adversities, who else would like (including me) that Ash and Eiji were together. But everything happens for a reason and in life you have to know how to get up, that is not only the lesson that the manga has, this is also a lesson for us as human beings 😉
46:37
*[ **_Everybody disliked that_** ]*
この自粛期間中に、私は国内外にBANANA FISHの感想を求めて読み漁りました。最終回で他の人々が受けた衝撃、悲しみ、結末を信じられない気持ちに共感することで、私の悲しみが癒されるような気がしたから。
私が原作を読んだのはほとんど20年も前です。友人の一人に勧められ、軽い気持ちでこの漫画を手に取ったときには、自分がこんなにも漫画の登場人物に感情移入することになる人間とは思っていませんでした。まして、中年になった今でも、毎回同じぐらい深く胸を抉る喪失感を感じるとは。
しかし、多くのアメリカの人々が「アッシュは自分で死を選んだ」と解釈していることは興味深いです。私の知る限りでは、日本では「彼は自分の傷は、即死はしないが、病院に行っても助からないと悟ったから図書館へ行った」と受け止めている感想が多いからです。
私はこのコメント欄の多くの深く掘り下げた考察にも感嘆しました。動画をシェアしてくださってありがとうございます、Mr.Teeaboo.
あなたの他の動画も拝見します。
I don't usually cry over shows, and Banana Fish was no exception, however, I don't think I have ever felt so empty and sad after watching a show, as I did after watching Banana Fish. Like, I stared at my wall for a good 40 minutes trying to process my emotions. I honestly still haven't fully recovered from the sadness that is Banana Fish. I still love the show, how it portrays the character's emotions and thoughts, how it has complex characters with flaws and talents, how it teaches that love isn't always about words or made obvious, but can still be shown in other ways, the soundtrack. It really is a great story.
Mo Dao Zu Shi is a great choice, please do that!
Yes totally! Your reactions and analysis are the best, I really look forward to your interpretation of Mo Dao Zu Shi. It didn't get as much attention as it should've been since donghua (Chinese counterpart of anime) is not as globally widespread as anime yet.
bluesea devotee omg yesss
Aaaah! I thought I was done with crying already..... but everytime I watch that last scene.... it is just too much and I end up crying... I just really loved BANANA FISH, it was an amazing anime. Teeaboo thank you so much for all your reactions! I really love your comments and thoughts!
I am crying not kidding . Eiji didnt say goodbye and the ending song always has the line " i wish i could say goodbye over and over again " my periods arent helping FUCK
When I saw Ash dead I just had to lock myself in my room and cried for quite a while, then a friend came in and asked me why I was crying, but as I told him he just said ,,why are you crying about something like that he isn't even real 😂?" I told him he is an asshole and that he has to show his feelings more often. Now I'm sitting in the corner and I'm trying to get myself together. ,He just wanted to protect Eiji!😭
YES DO MO DAO ZU SHIII
thank you for reacting to this amazing show.
I’m never gonna get over this
The ending just wasn't it chief, but I loved watching your reactions for the past few months and it's been a great journey nonetheless. :')
I’ve basically become vegetative after this. I regret having watched any of this. I always get hurt after becoming emotionally invested in fiction, but this one just goes cuts so deep personally. If it hurts now, I wonder how much it will hurt when I never find my eiji. Sounds cringeworthy but it’s true
After Ash and Blanca shook hands I was like “Okay that’s the end. Stop right there. I dont need anymore feels...”🥺
Thank you for your reactions. I am emo again😭
The whole story was so intense that I was quite involved in the whole thing.....🤯🤯
I felt every thing from happiness to sadness, anger, remorse everything...😵😵
I was quite disappointed when Ash was not able to reunite with Eiji although he promised to see him again.....😭😭😭😭
Yau si (the Chinese guy) also quite invoked sympathy because of his back story but he was so much jealous of Ash's happiness that he became his enemy although he could join hands and avenge his mother.☹️☹️☹️
This anime left me speechless..
🤐🤐
Fantastic way of showing the harsh world, the importance of friends, hope !!🙂🙂
Cried a whole awful lot after the series ended.....😭😭😭😭🤧🤧🤧🤧🤧
Okay so I've watched this series of Teaboo's just now for the second time and I dont think I've made a comment on this series before but I honestly have to. This is the most beautiful show and reaction I have ever seen. I balled my eyes out all night last night and all day today simply because of how beautiful the ending was and how much it hurt. I know you probably wont see this comment teaboo but you should review yuri on ice next if you havent seen it! You probably have but maybe! Anywho thankyou so much for making such amazing videos and entertaining me to no extent!
It hurts looking at
Yut-Lung cuse In Yasha Volume 49
Yut-lung and Sing are brought up and it reads that Yut-lung got murderd at age 30, and called Sing a friend.
We didn’t even see Yut-Kung and Sing’s relationship 😭😭😭
Well sh*t. There are just no happy endings, are there? But when I think about it, I can almost understand what Banana Fish's creator was trying to convey through all the tragedies of this story. It shows us that reality is often cruel, and unless we want people to continue this cycle of suffering and abuse, we need to take action, defy fate, to do what we can to improve the world. Ash's side won through determination, courage, and strength. They rid the world of Banana Fish and exposed the pedophiles. But him and his friends alone weren't enough to completely avoid the crushing truths of reality. People were always going to want to make Ash pay for the countless things he did (even if it was for self-defense or revenge and in the effort of bettering the world). No matter how much good someone tries to accomplish, there will be something or someone in the way who thinks differently, but ultimately, still wants to better their lives in this messed up cycle where almost everyone is both the victim, and the assailant (like in the case of Yut Lung). So yeah, one of the many morals of the story could be that reality is quite unfair, but that we need to make the most of it to do what we can, and to give others a chance to live better lives and survive if you, yourself, cannot be spared (as was with the case of Ash saving Eiji through his death and cutting the ties so no one would pursue Eiji any longer).
Sorry this was long, I got carried away. Hope you enjoyed. :,)
The ending reminds me of Ernest Hemingway’s A Farewell to Arms (where a solider falls in love with a nurse in the midst of WWI, get pregnant, and run away to Switzerland; only to give birth to a stillborn and the nurse dies of a hemorrhage, leaving the soldier all alone). If the mangaka was going for a depressing end that paid homage to that painful work of Hemingway, she did a scarily accurate job. Though I...strongly dislike that Ash and Eiji can’t be together in the end, because it ends this way, it’s nice to know this generation is experiencing classic tragic poetry in such a modern take.
Thank you for your reactions, Teeaboo! I'm very glad you liked Banana Fish, I hope more people will start watching it because of you!
To complete the story, here you can find New York Sense:
ash-callenreese.tumblr.com/scans/new-york-sense
It's a canon book of pictures Eiji took in New York City; the first half has actual photos, the second half has Yoshida's official art, there are "new" pictures of Ash (of course "old" in canon because... you know why) and a few pictures of other characters taken about 4/5 years after Garden of Light. I'd love to know what you think!
About the ending, there's something else I wanted to say. I expect many fans telling you that Ash "chose to die". That's the most common interpretation of the ending, but apparently only among Western fans. Personally, I'd suggest to read this thread because I like this interpretation (from a Japanese fan) better:
www.reddit.com/r/BananaFish/comments/aij0vd/a_different_view_of_the_ending_long_post/
I'm not saying it's the only true way to see it, but I wish more Western fans would at least consider it as a possibility.
I might add another comment if I decide to rewatch your video. Anyway, I also want to thank all the other fans here because I love reading your posts too! It was fun, the journey is over... but I won't say sayonara to you, because I'm sure we'll see each other again. :)
God, I’ve watched this ending multiple times, and I’ve read it many more times in the manga...but it never fails to destroy me. There are a couple more side stories - Fly Boy In the Sky, Ura Banana, Cape Cod Story (That Summer), and the “final” epilogue, New York Sense. Anyway, thank for your excellent, contemplative, and studious commentary, and for watching this. It’s been a pleasure.
Seeing Teeaboo's BF reaction episode 24, grabs tissue and popcorn:
"Well I guess it's time to cry again"
Thank you so much for this amazing ride, your review and comments are quite entertaining and insightful, it just adds more for my love of BF. Keep it up Teeaboo!
I can't really put into words why this show affected me so much more than any other.
I watch a lot of anime, including some that are arguably better than BF, if I'm trying to be objective. Several lacked a happy ending. Many had complex characters, and so on. Heck, I wouldn't even give BF a 10/10 rating despite my love for it, but...in the end, *nothing* ever affected me as much emotionally as BF did. The first time I finished it, I cried for hours and was an emotional wreck for months if I so much as thought about it. It took me over a year to be ready to watch this reaction because I hadn't steeled myself enough yet to live through it again.
Of course, watching it alongside you made me cry yet again.
But I think thanks to your insightful, detailed analysis, I understand a bit better now why I felt so strongly for this show, compared to other ones. So thank you so much for your thoughtful, interesting reaction, and a very belated welcome to the lingering pain that is "having watched Banana Fish" ;)
TT_TT in all honesty I was rewatching Banana Fish with you and it took me three days to allow myself to watch the last episode because I knew it would hurt again. But I can't complain about the ending. No matter how much I wish they got to be happy together this ending was so in theme with the whole anime that I can just sit here and cry about it all.
That's the worst about it, that the ending fits so well that I don't *want* it to be different 😢
There are plenty of not-so-happy endings in media, and plenty of deaths I'm sad about, but usually I can flee to the world of fanworks to be in denial there~
But not with Banana Fish. I don't want a different ending. This one was perfect. But that sure doesn't make it easier to get over it...
Balancing between hope and despair... that's what Banana Fish did with us, giving us hope that maybe Ash could have been with Eiji at the airport... and then the only one who didnt see Ash as we saw him killed him. Those last five minutes i was doing my ugly crying and screaming to my mom that Ash died, even though she doesnt know a thing about Banana Fish. I'm sad your other reactions are not available. I enjoyed watching this with you.
Congrats on making it through, and thanks for the reactions.
Some reactors have talked a lot over this ending; we could all see the thousand-mile stare when reality finally kicked in. I actually appreciated the fact that you took the time to really absorb what was happening.
It strings you along just when you think that there's a chance of a good end to all the suffering. Nope. It makes it worse. This finale hurts, but it's still amazing that it went there.
I'm not a crier, I never have been. This is the one series that really got to me. I haven't seen a reactor get to the end in a while.... I thought I would be okay since it had been a while but I guess I was wrong. I cried again.
Though on a lighter note..... now you can fully enjoy Banana Fish memes.
It's the only thing that makes it hurt less.
but maybe it will hurt forever,even with memes hahaha. I watched maybe 4 reactors for this series and Teaaboo was the last one I was watching. The first 3 ended the anime in december so the pain was mutual for all of us. Then today,3 months after the final episode I thought I had overcomed the ending a little bit but I was wrong. I fucking cried again with teaaboo reaction hahahah
@@Kari_Bunny XD yeah same. I made my friend watch it blind a couple of weeks after it ended. I barely kept it together but I totally lost it this time... Again.
It's the only show that's hit me this hard. I can only think of one other show that's made me cry and definitely not as frequently as Banana Fish
I've gotta say I relate to not identifying as a crier. I try my best not to get emotional or get too attatched to things. But this ending. Was fricking. Tragic. I loved Ash and every other character so much. I HAD to care. It hit me like a bus of shock, disappointment, anger, and despair that I just couldn't help but sob over the unfairness of it all. I tear up every time.
Rewatching all your commentary on this series, it's all absolutely amazing and you noticed so many things that I never noticed! I love your react videos because you don't just react, you discuss and analyze in such an engaging and fun way! Your videos are so relaxing and comforting as well, love the calm and good vibes
Thank you so much for sharing your reactions with us! Your commentary throughout was phenomenal. Banana Fish will always be a really special show to me in my heart. I mean, Ash and Eiji are just absolute soulmates. Watching this series with you was so fun from beginning to end, and I look forward to seeing more whether it's Mo Dao Zu Shi (which is incredible) or whatever else fans decide! I know I've commented this once before, but I figured I'd bring it up again just in case it got lost in a sea of other comments. I think a really good option for the polls would be No.6. A lot of Banana Fish fans came directly from that anime, including me. Both are plot heavy rather than just being a mlm romance between two characters. No.6 has many similarities to Banana Fish. For example: they both focus on government corruption and the state of the world they're living in, there's really good chemistry between both main characters (Nezumi and Shion), a lot of danger and turmoil in the process of getting to their end goal, both animes are very underrated lmao, etc. No.6 is an amazing story which I think you would most definitely enjoy, given how much you like this one.
Anyway, thanks again for reacting to Banana Fish. It was a wild ride!
The thing that always gets me every single time I watch anything Banana Fish related is how Ash was never allowed to be concerned about himself or his own feelings. Guess that's why he was a leader, but it just hits me hard. He always had to think or take care of others and all he needed was someone like Eiji to come along sooner and change his path. Ugh, Blanca could have taken him away while he was still young. This boy was used for his body in multiple ways since he was young and all he needed was someone to protect him.
I may have said this on here before or elsewhere, but that's how this freaking show affected me and it's hard to even watch the happy times without it feeling bittersweet.
I am so sorry if this comment is coming through a second time, I am unsure if it went through properly on my first attempt. Do you think it would be possible for you to upload your Banana Fish reactions to a file sharing site ? Many of them went down due to copyright strikes and I would love to watch them again
I'll see what I can do, but some may be fully lost.
@@Teeaboo Thank you so much ! Best of luck
Fue un placer haber visto este anime contigo... Ahora iré a llorar :'/
aún no lo supero :( lo vi nuevamente en la reacción y sigo llorando!!
I'm sorry but I do not like Garden of Eden Eiji's design, I just feel like I'm looking at Blanca and it's really pulling me out of the story, I really wonder how Ash would feel about that, his boyfriend looking just like his mentor.
But I do very much appreciate the confirmation in Garden of Eden that Eiji and Ash's relationship was never sexual, I feel like this adds another layer of purity to their relationship and it's such a huge testament of respect for Ash from Eiji. I know a conversation between them about this subject wasn't necessary because of how things were shown but it would have been such an eye-opening conversation for them to have. Even though Ash weaponizes sex he absolutely hates it because for him it's violence and dominance and trauma and I love that instead of Eiji trying to be like "hey its different when it's real love etc" instead he's like "we don't need that in our relationship, and we don't need it to show love to each other". And when you think about it Eiji and Ash are able to have this relationship and yet they hardly ever touch each other because Eiji is mindful and respectful of how Ash feels about physical contact---but we also get to see that when they do touch hands or hug it's very affectionate and very wholesome and that's what Ash really needed, he needed love that was wholesome and he needed affection that portrayed that wholesomeness and Eiji was able to do that. There's this scripture in the bible, it's 1 Corinthians 13:1 and it goes:
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
And Eiji and Ash's relationship is Every. Single. One of these traits.
I almost feel like Ash was able to accomplish more than that Leopard. He climbed to the top and was able to make it back down and in a way I almost feel like after reading that letter, after his soul confirmed he was loved, he almost seemed comfortable enough to die. And it’s almost as if he was able to climb to warmth to die as well. I feel like a heartless human for not crying at all.
The people in New York finally getting to see Ash as how Eiji's seen him all this time, not a ruthless killer but a human who just needed so much love.
This finale makes me kinda sad cuz your reactions to Banana Fish was amazing, thank you very much that I get to relive the show again (even if it hurts) lol. ^^
This is the first time I've watched Banana fish. After three days, I'm still randomly bursting into tears over it. I have a lot of feelings about the ending. I'm sitting here, still crying, thinking about what could have happened. I really dislike Lao, but I understand that he wanted to protect his little brother. I hate the ending, but at the same time I think it's fitting. Ash deserved so much more than what he got and it breaks my heart because I really loved his character. It seems a bit silly but I really wanted a happy-go-lucky airport scene even though I already knew from spoilers that it would end this way, and it still caught me off guard. I didn't expect Lao to be the one who dealt the final blow, but I'm glad Ash got his closure with Dino. I just want to cry because of how much I loved Eiji and Ash. I heard of Banana fish as a BL recommendation, but honestly I loved them as both friends or a couple. They deserved the world and they didn't get it. There are a lot of things in angry/hurt about with the choices of them, like why Eiji decided to go back to Japan, or why Ash didn't get help and then see Eiji once he was healed, but it isn't for me to be upset over those choices. It was a very "Banana Fish" ending, which makes me sad, but it also was a filling ending. Banana Fish is such a good anime, and not every show can make you feel so many emotions at once. It was beautifully created, and I WILL be crying for the next 6 weeks :')
I'm right there with you. I'm new to this anime and finished it within 4 days just yesterday. I wish I could've made it last longer.
Ash's death was also spoiled for me in a way. I completely freaked out for 2 minutes when I heard, but decided to deny it because who would kill the main character? But the uneasiness about Ash's fate built up as I watched the last 3 episodes. I was still shocked and broken by the death scene when it occured. I hadn't expected him to end in that way by the hands of someone he had protected from the knowledge of Banana Fish. Ash was my favorite character who went through beautiful character development, and who persisted in a world that was constantly against him. I can't help but feel his fate was extremely unfair. I only wish Ash hadn't been alone in those final hours. It didn't have to be Eiji, who would never be the same after that, but an acquaintance like Sing would've been a nice comfort. I also would've like a proper farewell between Ash and Eiji, like the text Ash sent Max, calling him "Dad." But no. Fate was not so kind. (At least they're together in spirit, never truly seperated.)
Yet, I like how it ended. He was rarely able to make his own decisions throughout his life, pushed this way and that by sick and cruel people. He could choose where to die and how he would spend his last moments. He wanted to die with the proof of Eiji's love in his hands, and with that happiness in his heart. He might have been able to survive (I heard Lao missed all his vital organs, but don't quote me on that). But he didn't want to continue the cruel cycle of reality. He believed that he would die as payback for everything he had done and all the people he killed. He wasn't a villain in our eyes, acting in self-defense and revenge, but to Lao, he was. He would always be pursued by someone, no matter how long he lived. So he chose to die and love rather than hate and struggle to live. He was happy. He died knowing that he was saving Eiji by cutting their ties for good, sparing Eiji from those who sought revenge for Ash's many acts. He could die knowing he was loved, that he too could love someone else, and that his last months were worth living, having known Eiji and his unconditional love and friendship. He was to be free, no longer a caged bird, free from his life of struggle and abuse.
I rarely cry. But goddamn. I felt like I was hit by a bus. This anime deserves all the tears and love in the world. It's safe to say that I was teary eyed all night and all throughout today. The tears have yet to stop and I apologise if I have prolonged your sadness.
Yes, it's fitting. Yes, it's tragic. Never have I loved a story that hurt me so much.
@@citriz Couldn't have said it better myself. I was really sad about the ending and I feel like it was selfish of him to leave Eiji (just me being salty about him not going to a hospital) I think he truly deserved his chance to be selfish for once. He really deserved the world and his happy ending in Japan, but he decided he would be in control of his fate at that moment. The ending was a huge slap in the face for me, because it was spoiled for me too, but I was in denial because I don't usually see something with a not-so-happy ending. I love Ash so much, and I love Eiji too. This anime struck my heart without me realizing it and all of a sudden I was crying over a fictional story. They deserved the world, and the ending was bittersweet, but I really, REALLY enjoyed the show.
@@cydnim.8068 Agreed.
So many characters went through crap. But at least Ash won, the pedophiles were exposed, Banana Fish was destroyed, Ash is free, and Eiji is safe.
I actually cried a little in front of my younger sister 😂. I don't remember any story that made me feel so sad. I was a little embarrassed at the time. Like you said, it's fiction. But it's an extremely well done piece of art that was able to get me to care about almost every character, as well as worry for them. I know I couldn't have stopped the tears anyway. A good sob or two was much needed after the finale. And I'm glad I could mourn.
I don't regret watching Banana Fish despite what it did to my heart. It was an amazing journey and I won't say "Sayonara" to this show any time soon.
I just finished it and I’m not ok
Hey dude, today I sat here and binged all your BF reactions only to cry at episode 24 for the umpteenth time. A year later and I still have to live with the fact that my headcanon of Ash and Eiji being alive and living in Japan together is only that, a headcanon. Thanks again for putting so much love and effort into your reactions of this series, it's appreciated.
It’s weird to think what that librarian’s reaction will be when she realizes that was a dead guy and not a sleeping guy. I would probably take some time off work after that.
how romantic. proposing in a hail of bullets.
It’s been 3 months since this show ended, and I’m far from getting over it.
I’m sad about so many things today.
I’m sad because it’s been 3 months and I’m still in denial.
I’m sad because they’re not real but my pain is. (I actually cried a whole lot again watching this reaction video, and I screamed “why!?” At the top of my lungs again watching Lao stabbing Ash.)
I’m sad because I’m a sucker for happy endings and I didn’t get one. (I really think Ash deserved a happy life with Eiji, damn it)
I’m sad because I remembered Garden of Light exists. (But until is not animated for me it doesn’t, actually in Banana Fish’s official page Ash is not marked as dead)
I’m sad because I loved to watch this series with you and now it’s over. (But I’ll still wait for Rambo Ash)
But despite all, I’m really thankful for this journey, it was really amazing, thanks for reacting to Banana Fish, now my favorite show of all times.
I’ll definitely stick with you in the future ❤️
"I'm sad because they're not real but my pain is."
Ohh I never thought of it that way. Growing up, my mom would always scold me for getting emotional about fictional things, saying it's silly because it's not real, and I guess I ended up believing that. But even if the characters aren't, our emotions for them are. I really like that sentence :)
@@sleepysera of course
Ishizuka unsyou
It was said that all voices were recorded before other voice actors considering physical condition
He is the one who played the voice of Joseph JoeStar(Jojo part3 & part4)
Damn, man, what a journey you've made with this series! It's so unusual to see a person reacting commit so much, taking notes and going back to rewatch some parts for quotes or shots frame by frame, I loved your commentary on the plot, the animation and the reaction overall, particularly here in the last episode: not rushing, processing what happened and how it made you feel and why....very powerful
'Must be a nice dream.'
I've gotten so numb and so use to being hurt that, I couldn't cry.....
Dont deny it, we all cried
Im now gonna go watch banana fish on crack to go heal my soul 😭
I really appreciate all of your banana fish videos, they are so well thought out with the analysis and I love your interpretation of everything. It’s almost enough to make up for you pronouncing GIF like ‘jiff’ (joke)
i think i’ve rewatched the series of your reactions to this show at least five times now. the way you express your feelings of the show is amazing.
Thank you for the great reaction😭this is really late but I just binge watched ur banana fish reaction in one day and still waterfalled for the fifth time watching this show.
Did you read the original manga ?（last one episode) There is a conversation omitted in the animation. Ash's death feels more sad.
Teaboo thank you for uploading all the full episodes and extra parts in the manga 👊 🙇😘
Are you going to keep this posted? Or take it down after a while? I want to know, as my friends are going to have another anime benge night and I really want to watch this with em. I know they'll be just as emotionally effected or even more 😅
Hello. I wanted to say thank you for giving people the opportunity to experience such a unique and beautiful series like Banana Fish. I've already seen the series one time and read the manga as well, so thank you (again) for allowing me to re-experience Banana Fish through your own creative insight and interpretations!
It's been quite the journey. Thanks for reacting to this show.
After watched the ending, i think i'll NEVER see it a second time, but with your reaction video i see and crying again... TT
It,s good ending...
Honestly, I feel like Banana Fish was a study in humanity and how much socially and psychology effect things.
ahhh, whyyyyyy I usuallycomplain about endings always being the same but now I wish this was just another happily ever after, I cant say was crying cause the ending was some wha spoild when I was on tiktik while watching the series.
Loved your reactions to this series, very in depth analysis. The ending hurts every time... my personal thoughts on it are that it’s not a case of Ash being a victim of his ‘fate’ ie: his life of violence was ‘bound’ to catch up to him if he followed Eiji. In my interpretation, it’s his lack of belief in himself that he is capable of living a peaceful life with Eiji, being unable to let go of the ‘Lynx’ and choose to fully become Aslan, that leads to his death. In the scene with Blanca this is the first time where you can argue that Ash has a free choice of how to shape his life. Before then his life path was shaped by the evil all around him and he was just surviving. Now with his enemies dead, we clearly see him choosing to remain with his gang and do what he is used to doing- living a life of violence. At that point he is resolved to be Ash Lynx forever and therefore give up Eiji, because he knows rationally that Eiji’s peaceful world and the world of Ash Lynx cannot coexist without Eiji being hurt. Consider however if he’d had the self belief and resolve to completely disappear- to become anonymous and then find Eiji later on, chose a peaceful life- the boy is smart enough to do it... so why doesn’t he? I think it’s a lack of belief that he is good enough and deserves love and a peaceful life, because a huge part of his core identity is sadly that of the ‘Lynx’, ‘tiger’ ‘demon’ etc that people have always seen him as.
It’s when he loses focus and selfishly tries to make the Ash Lynx and Aslan Callenreese identities coexist out of emotional desperation (when he reads Eijis letter and tries to go after him, despite knowing that he’s still deep in the gang world) that he is punished for that selfishness. He’s reminded once again that those worlds can’t exist together. We see when he chooses to die (and earlier in the ‘suicide’ scene with Yut Lung, and the ‘god, take me instead’ scene) that he loves Eiji more than he is capable of loving himself... for me, Ash’s story is a lesson about the importance of knowing who you are and caring for yourself and the people around you, whatever life throws at you.
I'm happy to have found your channel, I've watched your BF in a few days. And I want to thank you for reacting to the series with an open mind, I enjoyed also the time you took to discuss each one of the episodes, I think that is what makes your channel different from others. The ending is bittersweet, I still can not understand why the author decided such an end for a person who suffered as much as ash. Anyway, It's been a pleasure to have watched BF again with you. Definitely, you are one of the best reaction channels and I also wanna thank you for recommending Monster, I decided to give it a try and I'm loving it. I subscribe to your channel and I am also gonna check out Mo Dao Zu Shi, I'm looking forward to what comes next. (sorry if there are grammatical errors, English is not my main language)
I wish there was an another episode where Eiji founds out he dies, and returns to New York and sits down at the funereal site where Ash would be buried. Eiji would talk to him and the clip would fast forward over the years of Eiji talking to him, till he is very old and soon passes away. Once Eiji dies he reunites with Ash in his spirit form. They then walk together hand n’ hand away from the camera view until we can’t see them anymore.
Need more ice-cream and tissues...I can't I just can't 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
I'm really happy you gave this a long reaction and didn't cut out a majority of your thoughts and silences. It really gives it the appropriate time and energy needed to process all the feelings. :)
A small video of Ash seducing his enemies to escape cought my attention and I immediately searched for Banana Fish. I fell in love with the anime immediately, but when I started watching the memes and vines, I saw how devastated almost everyone was about this episode and I just stopped watching... I didn't want something I just recently found and loved to end in such a bittersweet way, so I put it off for weeks. I came back to it today because I hate leaving things unfinished, so I just sat down and watched. I cried at the end, of course, but it was worth it to finally see how one of my new favourite animes end. I wish we could know what happened to Ash, Eiji, Sing and the other gang members...
I love how well the characters grow and change throughout the show, and the moment things started to happen I knew atleast one of my favourites would die... And two did, maybe three... Skipper, Shorter, and possibly Ash.... The reason I say "possibly Ash" is because on the wiki for Banana Fish, everyone who died during the show had a grayed image. But Ash didn't. His was still colourful, which I hope means he didn't just give up his life in the library and leave Eiji, Sing, Blanca and Cain to discover his death.
It hurts.. so sad.. but im sure hes alive.. hes always got shot and stabbed but still alive right..? It won't be that hard for him to survive this time around.. hehe part 2.. part 2.. i hope the production will make for another part.. hehe 😊😊☺☺ hes alive for sure..
Omg this ending is so bittersweet, none the less beautiful I really enjoyed your reviews for banana fish. You should definitely react to mo dao zu shi, it is a beautiful story along with great animation and great characters!thanks again for your amazing reviews.
Yes please. We need a mo dao Zu shi reaction.
I wish theres a season 2 for this..😥
Unshō Ishizuka...RIP
Btw Sing still comes up in Yoshida's manga Yasha, if maybe you're interested
"Ooooh god da-OH That's a face" 32:18
I'm cackling omg great reaction!!! I've spent the past days binge-watching your videos and they're all wonderful!
I am happy I watched your reaction, I was really waiting for this episode of yours, I watched the end and read the epilogue so many times, I can't count I just can't stop crying every time I'm still in denial, the author said Ash died because he needed to be atone for his sins, but....Sing ... for me Ash is still alive, I want happily ever after and I understand Eiji's feelings ... why did he not come to the library? ... anyway I loved the series and I still waiting another epilogue....where Ash is alive yes denial :(
Oh well my heart is broken again 💔
He lived and died for someone else
When you... get.. into a series and just come to relate and rely on the hope everything that just.... something to.. hold onto you really come to forget about reality.. and when it’s over it just ends.. when that character dies it’s as if you die with them... a true ending
I started tearing up when you were looking forward to the airport run spilling but I knew beforehand what was going to happen bus I've watched and read the ending sooo many times and I still tear up over it even tho it was now confirmed by MAPPA that Ash survived and opened a cafe with Eiji in Japan and they are living together happily
August would have been Ash's birthday
wish she had chosen pictures of birthdays.christmas..whatever just to show nice moments,events Ash had but she shows him getting dressed..considering his story feels off to me
another thing thats off is she is 14,sing in his 20's and marries her when she turns 18 and she becomes china town mafia boss wife! hardly what ash wanted,how does Ibe feel about that?
he keeps taking/sending people to NY when they are having problems they then get involved with the mafia!
difficult seeing Eiji run after that guy hoping its Ash
Cape Cod is where Ash was born,they went theere to try aand get info through Griffs letters
makes no sense Sing would have Ash letter
in GOL it comes accross that sing has feelings for Eiji!
Eiji feeling guilty about the letter
I hate Yut talking on the phone so casualy about ash after everything thats happened
Lao
hate hate hate Lao
but I also hate that the audience has some sympathy with him as he thought he was saving sing
he was folllowing sing around and seemed surprised hed gone to see ash but he saw they were fine with each other,so many things happen in life because people miss understand whats going on
I hated Ash being upset and saying that Lao sees the real monster in him,Lao and the others always call him that when they are in the wrong,like Dino and others calling hima whore when they rape him
I think he only refused to kill eiji because he knows sing would have nothing to do with him otherwwise he would have said no early,that and he knows ash would kill him
but he kept quiet,knew they were going to try and kill them
I think shorter was just an excuse for his claims of hate earlier he seemed obsessed with Sing being the boss of a larger area saying not even shorter managed that..
he hates the idea of working with anyone outside of the chinese he probably hated shorter been friends with ash
its confusing that Lao stabs Ash then seems angry Ash let him!
thank you! チャンネル登録しました☺️
Guys don’t worry 😔 the story that was suppose to go with a happy ending, but the artist 😾
I can’t accept this ending... I just can’t! But your reaction videos for the whole series is so inspiring and well thought out that I now have to watch some of your other videos! I appreciate the content and insight you give on the anime even if I want to cry forever now!!